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As I think about my own SRS and the attendant frustrations, I wonder if Penile inversion is the best route to take? Perhaps it would be best to do an intestinal resection because, what I am hearing, is that lubrication is better and dilation much less frequent after the initial healing period.
Owing to my own lack of diligence perhaps, dilation continues to be about as much fun as scrubbing the toilet. So far, there is absolutely nothing fun about it. All this is simply a question, and a little whining on my part.
I think the people who make these dilators should only be T folk, so they will make the utmost effort to make something that will work for T folk. Grrrrrrrr!
Comments
They're actually made
for genetic women who have reconstructive surgery. The use of a colon resection is a much bigger op and has it's own problems. Interestingly, people who suffer from ulcerative colitis, end up with ulcerative vagina if this op is done.
Angharad
PS I know the dilators are like plastic bullets, so maybe they're made for the military to stop riots in convents or girls' schools.
Angharad
Pro and Con
Dear Gwen,
The discussion ahs been on (and off) ever since the SRS was more than just a pure castration back from the beginning of the modern treatment of our situation. The version where part if the last part of the colon is used for a neovagina has had it's proponent, but as times has passed that method has been used in fewer and fewer cases. It has some drawbacks. One is that the moisturing is not really like the humidity we see in the vagina of GGs, the second is that the fluid is more or less continous and is not stimulated my any arousement of the new female, but I think it is the somewhat odd smell that the fluid that the (ex-)intestin fluid gives is one of the problems science has not yet solved. On the drawbacks of the penile inversion we always have this constant dilatation over the first three or four years after the operation. On the positive side we have that the walls of the newvagina have a structure like our outer skin that is really a stable tissue that is constructed to handle wear and tear. After some time it is changed to look more like the inner tissues that we have, but by that time most of the intense dilatation is over.
A liberal use of KY-cream, or equivalent, will sothen the ordeal. As long as it has to be done four to three times a day it is really a problem, kombining it with job. But then, perhaps after a month or so it might be reduced to a morning and evening practise. To me this was a time to start the day and finish it as well. Giving me time to think about the day to come or the day that had passed. Often the morning was passed while reading the morning paper and the evening dilatation with reading a book or listenning to nice music.
So from my own experiemce I would chose the penile inversion methode if I was to have the op now and knowing how it was for me when that happened more than five years ago.
Your
Ginnie
GinnieG
SRS
Hi Ginnie:
I had it about 15 months ago, and have foolishly not been dilating enough. 1" is OK but with moderate pain. 1 1/4 can be done but I am usually quite cranky afterward. I just curse myself that I had the size up that large and comfortably and then stopped for a while. There were extenuating circumstances but the end result is that I have to stretch it all again, and it is quite, well, awful.
Let this be a warning to those hapless maids who follow.
Now, as far as handling some of the guys I have seen: the idea that I will ever be capable of that is pure fantasy. I sincerely hope that some of these steeds are a rarity. :)
Gwendolyn
Must be disciplined
For me, weekly is preferable and twice a month is not the best, though okay once in a while. However, I can handle a 1.5 inch diameter dilator with little discomfort, but my depth is on the low side. Keep in mind that inadequate dilating can lead to a lack of depth too (stenosis).
Lubrication and patience is absolutely essential else you are begging for a lot of pain. The only way to increase the diameter is to, unfortunately, do it more often - preferably at least twice a day until the diameter increases and then maintaining a schedule to keep it there. You must also leave it in for sufficient time also. I leave it in for at least a half an hour - or until the vagina feels looser.
Yes it is a pain ( literally ! ) but keep in mind that most Caucasian men are AT LEAST 1.25 inches in diameter. 1.5 is not uncommon. It took me eight months to work my way up after SRS to start from 1.125 inches to 1.5 inches in diameter. There is a bit of a trade between diameter for depth btw, increasing the diameter will mean you will not be able to put in the larger diameter dilator as far. There seems to be a fixed amount of volume to play with for a given SRS.
Ironically, I am not oriented towards men - about 30-50% of all TS women are that way - but hey having a vagina is a treasure ? ;-).
Kim
Sexual Orientation
It is really odd. I was married for 39 years and was never even partly attracted to males. I hated them with a vengeance. (In retrospect, I could have been attracted to them but I was so far in denial, I'd have never known it.) I was abused a lot by them when young.
After SRS, and giving the matter a lot of thought, I slowly came round to the idea that I really like them, A LOT! Some of it may simply be a twisted Freudian thing, and I view a desirable and nice male as a Father figure that I never had. For some inexplicable reason, Women are not interested in me.
With all my saucy and provocative talk, I will have to say that I have not had a sex partner since SRS. I could spend the rest of my life and not have sex, or a mate. It is what it is.
Must be disciplined...
Oh the joys of dilation... not
Kim, I suspect that a year after SRS each individual is different based on age and genetics as to the frequency they need to dilate. Activity level, resiliancy of tissue, muscle tone.
When I was much younger one of my early boyfriends was about 6'5" and proportional elsewhere. The set of five acrylic bullets I was given ended at 1.5" and did not come close to my needs. Having a related background I developed "extended sizes" in 1/8" incriments and changed the shape to something bioengineered for the task and of durable sanitary materials. Somehow the word got around and years later I had a company that did nothing else but make stents from something the size of your pinkie to 2.5" the size of a beer can. What we found was that if you wanted to have an active sex life and a comfortable experience, you needed to go much larger than your intended partner (not needing to dilate before sex). Some girls followed this regimen of dilating and found they could have spontanious sex with a partner and easily accomodate them as well as use their internal muscles to vary the degree of pressure. This made for a very pleasurable experince for both partners.
There were a few lesbian and bisexual customers who wanted to have the resiliancy to accomodate a partners hand as a real vagina would as well.
As you pointed out, stenosis is a problem but not just amoung the post op TS community but with natal women as well. Eventually the demand exceeded our ability to deliver.
Another factor
... is what is your size. I can handle your average penis comfortably I am pretty sure. I am a pretty small woman at 112 pounds and around 5'7". I do not like big men. Your ability to accommodate also is determined by your pelvic structure as well. The idea of accommodating a 2.5 *shudder*.
Kim
pelvic limitations
I am sure there are others, I had one close friend in group who like you was petite and when she had her SRS her pelvic bones were so close that Toby told her she may have trouble passing a 1.5" stent, this was distressing as she knew her fiance was easily that large.
2.5" is not a goal for the meek. Each 1/8" increase in diameter is a 3/8" stretch of tissue. Aggressive (daily) dilation going up through a set of five incremental stents would allow clients to move up one size each 4-6 weeks. You can't just shove your largest in there to start a session. It takes time but then you've waited your whole life to get this far, right?
I am not suggesting this as a course of action for anyone.
The source of the solution
Gwen said, "I think the people who make these dilators should only be T folk, so they will make the utmost effort to make something that will work for T folk."
I had to laugh at this comment because of one I heard much like it years ago from a woman who said, "If men had to do laundry, there would be one machine which would sort, wash, dry, iron,fold and probably hang all the stuff up in your closet!"
It reminds me of the situation with Alice of Through the Looking Glass wherein she is running and is dismayed to find out that she ends up in the same place. She comments on how how different things are where she comes from.
"A slow sort of country!" said the Queen. "Now, here you see, it takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that."
It is a sad commentary that we are often at the mercy of others in choosing our equipment for worldly endeavors, but then perhaps it is necessary that it be that way: we could not possibly design everything for our treks through the world and, if we could, we should still be loading the existential minivan in the driveway.
Love may be all we need, but many of us only know it by its shadow.
A small watermellon
One reality about real Vaginas and Cervices is that they are designed to get a lot bigger when needed. They'll pass a two liter baby with facility; a privilege I will never have. I am quite disappointed that God did not give me a real one.