I was hoping that I'd be able to get some writing done this month, but between the depression, anxiety, and sleeplessness it's been difficult to get anywhere Things were bad enough, but Martin broke up with me on Saturday and I've spent most of the time since crying my eyes out. We're going to keep living together for the summer, and I'm going to spend a lot of that time working on myself but now I have to figure out what to do from here. I can't stay in Quebec, hell it hurts too much just to stay with Martin and I need to go somewhere where I can get my medical needs addressed. I'm a mess right now and I'm not even sure where to start. So now I need to figure out what to do, where I can start over, and how I'm going to afford it without much income.
Sorry to be a downer everyone,
Amethyst
Comments
Big Hugs!
Take the time you need for you.
Is there anything we can do.?
Big Big Hugs tmf
Thanks
Right now I just need to figure out where I'm going and how I'm going to raise the money to get there and cover a few months rent and expenses until I can get a day job or something. I have one possibility south of the border but I need to be prepared in case I can't get a visa and have to look elsewhere in Canada.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
All I can suggest is make
All I can suggest is make sure you have some ways for people to get money to you, to get some sort of bankroll together.
Venmo, Paypal, Patreon - somewhere where you can stash money to then be able to put them into a bank account.
Make sure it's in YOUR name, not his.
Maybe touch base with your old doctor, and find out if they have a suggestion for where to go?
I'll get a life when it's proven and substantiated to be better than what I'm currently experiencing.
Resources
I know it is difficult right now but you have to take the opportunity to get a war chest together.
A reconciliation is preferable for you I assume but you have to plan in such a way that you survive.
Provide a way for the folks on this site to help you if they can.
I know you and Martin are barely on your feet again but you have to protect yourself for yourself.
*Hugs*
Yeah
I'm working on ways to gather funds, but my options seem limited right now. I wish we could work things out, I still love him and this hurts so damn much but it doesn't look like that's going to happen. Hopefully the Patreon page will help and if people have ideas, suggestions or want to help in other ways I'll be more than happy to hear from them. I can't afford to let my pride hold me back right now.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
I'm looking into that
Somebody suggested a gofundme, but I'm not sure about that since I heard that there's some loopholes in their ToS and stuff. I spent half the night setting up a Patreon page and if people want to help I have a paypal account too. Both of those are in my name, and I just need to open a bank account to link to them. Hopefully my Patreon will be live soon and I can get some subscribers so I can start squirreling money away.
I have a few possible locations in mind where I can get the medical stuff dealt with, it's just being able to afford travel and start-up expenses and setting up for a month or two where my only income may be what little I can make online.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
Technology
How are you fixed for technology? I know you were having computer troubles a while back.
Paypal is a must as not everybody is comfortable with a recurring payment type thing. Yes Patreon allows for a fixed commitment limit but a Paypal thing gives more sense of control for the giver, at least for me.
Tech-wise
My PC seems to be working fairly well since I fixed it and I have a tablet as well. Those are both coming with me wherever I end up going. I really wish there were a one time donation thing for patreon and I agree paypal gives more sense of control. If people want to support my writing that way then I'll be happy to do that.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
I am so sorry hon
wish I had something more than virtual huggles to give you
Me too
I could use real huggles right now :(
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
Hugs
I’m so sorry to hear that much hugs.
hugs :)
Michelle SidheElf Amaianna
Thanks Michelle
This has hit me pretty hard. This is the first time in days that I haven't spent most of the day crying, just an hour or two here and there :(
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
So Sorry
To hear that. I can only hope things get better for you soon. I'll put you in my prayers and am sending you big virtual hugs.
>----(^_^)----<
Rach
quis custodiet ipsos custodes
Thanks Rachael
I really hope things get better soon, I can't take much more of this.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
Enduring Trials.
Most of us here have been through some very painful times in our lives, including me. Somehow most of us survive, though at times it does not seem that we will.
In my opinion, you are an excellent Writer and many of your works would do well on the non LGBT commercial market. "Twice Removed" is an example of a story like that. Some of your other works would require a bit of editing to remove that content. In my reading, only about 10% of us are LGBT. I think straight stories sell better.
Thanks Gwen
I just wonder sometimes when the painful times are going to end and let me breathe a bit.
I do have some ideas for other non LGBT books, Raven's Blood is one that I could finish and put out in the market that doesn't have an LGBT bent, and I have had a few other ideas too.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
Writing
Gwen brings up a good point. Do you have possibilities of doing regular work.
Depression complicates things a lot with having a regular schedule if one were to have an employer.
My partner tried to get back to work as she is a chronic depressive but ultimately could not manage the regularity needed. I had an employee under me that had the same problem so I understand this a lot.
So it seems priority in addition to money is to get as much medical stuff done as possible so you can take the interim support you need and make the best of it until you can support yourself somehow. I do not know what kind of extended support Canada has but I am sure you have already explored all of those options.
It depends
If I'm on my anxiety meds I could probably handle it, though it would likely depend on the type of work. If I were in any other province right now I'd probably still be on disability. I'd rather be able to live off my writing but I'm not quite at that point yet so I'll have to take care of the medical issued and hope for the best until I can get settled somewhere else and figure things out.
*big hugs*
Amethyst
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
Unfortunately, my family is
Unfortunately, my family is all around the Ottawa area, and I'm not sure that'd be a good place for you. No connections anywhere else in Canada anymore. Not even a NewfieJohn.
I'll get a life when it's proven and substantiated to be better than what I'm currently experiencing.
Ottawa
It wouldn't be far to travel, but yeah, I'm not sure it would be a good fit for me. I can never lie with a straight face or without feeling bad about it and I hate politics.
Don't take me too seriously. I'm just kitten around. :3
My family hates politics and
My family hates politics and we're basically against lying - which gets us on a lot of liste de merde. I'm just thinking about the overall area. East side has a lot of Francophones, a lot of folks live across the river in Aylmer and similar for cheaper housing, and if you're more than 20 minutes upriver, I hope you understand an Irish accent :)
Anyway - it's pretty darn crowded (not as bad as Toronto), and the core of the city _is_ Politics.
I'll get a life when it's proven and substantiated to be better than what I'm currently experiencing.
I'm so sorry to hear about
I'm so sorry to hear about you and Martin. Having to start over is never easy, even when it's planned. I know that you will land on your feet, I just hope that you don't have to wait too long to do so.