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Here I go again.
No health insurance, which means scripts run out. One of them was my antidepressants. I probably am going to have to go out of pocket with this one.
Problem is the withdrawal. It is a killer, or could be. About a week before Christmas I went into a depression that I would class as life threatening. When I get like that I don't reach out to people, I just shut down. Which probably accounts for why I don't have the meds yet, a positive feedback loop of the worst sort. It broke in time for Christmas, which was good.
I don't like writing these kinds of posts, posting them even less. I feel like I am just bringing everyone else down.
My son left this Christmas to be with his sweetie. I hope he enjoys his holiday. I spent mine with my girl, which was good. But she is staying with her friends, and I am not really comfortable there.
My best friend has left town, I'm taking care of the many pets she has.
I am not alone, but I feel I am sometimes. Thing I hate about this kind of funk is I don't really think rationally. I really do look at it as a form of insanity.
So I'll just keep struggling on, trying to get through this. It is a bit better that when I was fighting myself after having come out, but the feeling is the same.
Comments
Well,
Well, in situations like this. The best thing to do is to do things to take you mind off of such matters. If you have any hobbies do them. Or, read a book. Watch a movie. Write a story. Just stay active, so you don't start thinking about such matters.
Anyway, I hope you get to feeling better.
Withdrawal symptoms
If you know when your scripts are about to run out, why don't you try tapering off your last few doses?
That way the withdrawal won't hit you quite so hard - and your tablets will last a little longer, too.
Penny
Don't know if that would work or not
You are coming down from them in any case, and there was a reason I was taking them.
Next time I need to pay more attention when I get low. Being Christmas isn't exactly conducive to getting new ones in a speedy manner.
It does help
Coming off a half dose or a quarter dose is a lot less shock than just going cold turkey from a whole dose.
I had to do this several times when my doc was experimenting with different anti-depressants to solve a different problem.
[For some strange reason I don't get depressed easily, if at all. I did have side-effects from Fibromyalgia which the doc was attempting to treat, and he was relying on the side effects of the anti-depressants to counteract those. Unfortunately they either sent me to sleep or had other undesirable side effects. With gabapentin I gradually became so accustomed to the drug I was taking stupid amounts and it wasn't doing anything much. It took me three months to taper off those.]
Penny
all I have to offer is huggles
but they're big warm ones.
Huggles, hon.
Thank Dot
They do help. Having friends help.
Bright lights
Sit in the sun if you can, if only for ten or fifteen minutes a day. Failing sunlight, you can use a florescent light combined with an incandescent one at the same time but they should be bright enough that you don't want to look directly at them. This helps your body maintain a healthy balance of brain hormones. Seriously, it works, thought not adequate for everyone and clinical depression is one of the things it sometimes does not help with.
Another trick is to take a bath and do a little primping, putting on some nice clothes. It may not help every time but it often takes the edge off the blues. If you can't get the anti-depressants refilled quickly enough, it may be worth trying.
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.