What Did We Do Wrong? Chapter 6

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Chapter 6

Hyun Ae was a ball of energy. She didn’t need sugar to fuel her hyperactivity. The prospect of her grandparents coming to see her was all the motivation she needed.

“Mommy! I’ve finished cleaning my room! Come look!”

“Is it mommy clean or Hyun Ae clean?”

Hyun giggled. “Mommy clean!”

“Okay, sweetie. Let me finish here in the kitchen, and I’ll come and check it out. Why don’t you come in here and help me unload the dishwasher”

“Coming, Mommy”

Hyun entered the kitchen at a dead run.

“Hyun Ae!” scolded her mother playfully. “Young ladies do not run everywhere they go”

“Sorry, Mommy. I’m just so excited to see Grammie and Gramps!”

“I know, honey. Just save some of that energy for them, all right?”

Jung kept an immaculate house. What passed for clean for most people was dirty to Jung. She was a homemaker, and a very good one. It was her passion. Her mother was the same way, and it carried down. Jung was a straight A student in school, and could have had her choice of careers, but she chose the simple life of a housewife and had never looked back. Hyun Ae was already developing the same traits. She loved helping her mother clean house and work in the garden.

Jung was teaching her little girl the intricacies of Korean cuisine, just as her mother had taught her. She was an eager student, and remarkable patient for a child of five. School would be starting for Hyun Ae in September, and that was less than ten months away. Jung would miss her little helper. She was growing to really appreciate the change in Hyun’s behavior. She really was a girl, in more ways than one.

Christmas was in Three days, and Jung’s folks would be staying until after New Year’s Day. Jung would be on pins and needles until she could gauge her parent’s reactions in person.

Justin was gone for the day. He had taken a couple of personal days from work. Stacee had given hi a contact to a lawyer, Kaitlin Allegri, who was sympathetic to the transgender cause. He had an appointment to discuss the situation with her.

“Thank you for seeing me on such short notice, Ms. Allegri”

“Kate, please. I got the basics from Stacee, and I am more than willing to take this case on a pro bono basis”

“I can afford to pay you, Kate”

“Maybe so, but I want to do this. People like your daughter have had to suffer discrimination for years, and it’s time we put it to a stop. Why don’t you give me your story?”

Justin gave Kate the full story. He had photos and videos of Hyun Ae from before and after the change. The boy of the past, while not overtly depressed was no comparison to the vivacious girl who appeared afterward.

“Justin, I have to say that I’m impressed with your little girl. It makes me look forward to actually meeting her”

“Thank you, Kate. I know she’ll love you”

Kate smiled. “I’m going to enjoy lighting up your parent’s team, Justin. I know they are your folks, but in this case, you have to put that aside. They chose this path, and we have to cut their heads off, so to speak. We’re fighting for Hyun’s life here. You made a responsible decision, based on a lot of thought and top notch medical advice. Some studies suggest that upwards of fifty percent of people like your daughter will attempt suicide. That is criminal. And it’s because they don’t get the support and encouragement they need. People shun them and wonder what’s ‘wrong’ with them. My uncle was one of those people, hounded until he couldn’t take it anymore. He was born as my aunt. We need to show that, and how well adjusted your daughter is now”

Justin nodded in agreement. “I’m glad you see it that way, Kate”

“In a perfect world this wouldn’t get a second look. However, I think it’s highly likely that this will see court. And when it does, the media will be all over it. They love a story like this. Are you ready for the attention this is sure to bring?”

“Yes. Media scrutiny in this case is a sword that cuts both ways. It will show my parents in the harsh light of reality, when they are shown bullying my little girl. I don’t want to make this a cause celebre, but if they want a fight, they’ll find me more than up to the task”

“Good. That will make my job that much easier. I’m good at what I do, Justin. And I play to win. Hopefully, you will be able to salvage a relationship with your parents after I beat them into submission”

Justin shrugged. “I hope so too. But if not, we’ll survive. They’ll be the losers” Justin thought of his idea. “Oh, and one more thing. Our little girl is quite the artist. I’m having her draw her feelings about how she felt before and after her change. She’s already got quite a portfolio, and I have several drawing from before this was an open issue”

“Good! This will give our doctors something to analyze. You do know that they’ll want to have someone interview her too. Probably some quack who thinks it’s a mortal sin for someone to live their life comfortable in their own skin. I think I know who they’ll use. I’ll be ready for him”

“All right, Justin. Let me get started on this, and I’ll be in touch’

“Great. Thank you very much”

Mr. and Mrs. Song arrived on Christmas Eve. They hadn’t spent a Christmas with Jung since she and Justin had married. Mr. Song was very fond of Justin. He embraced Jung’s culture without question, and had made a real effort to become a part of the family. Jung was an only child and was the apple of her father’s eye. Marrying an Anglo was not something Mr. Song had envisioned for his daughter, but Justin was very good man who lived for his family. This new development was a concern. Mr. Song was against it, for his own reasons, but Jung had explained it to him, and he was willing to listen and observe. That was his way. He was a man of few words, and he had escaped the north for that very reason.

Mrs. Song was really not that old. She was almost sixteen years younger than her husband, not yet forty five years old. She was from Seoul originally, and was a runner up in the Miss Korea pageant in 1968. She was still stunningly beautiful, and was totally devoted to her husband. She had a career early, but abandoned it willingly when she had Jung. They had expected a boy, but Mrs. Song was thrilled with Jung. The fact that Jung was a fairly androgynous name was a result of that confusion. She was looking forward to meeting her new granddaughter.

As Mr. and Mrs. Song were pulling into the driveway. It was only about six hours to LA, so they decided against flying. It would be easier on Jung, who really didn’t like driving in LA traffic.

Hyun had seen the car pull into the driveway and recognized her grandparents. “Mommy! Grammie and Gramps are here!”

She burst out of the front door as Mr. Song was exiting the vehicle. “Halmuni! Halabuji! I’m so happy you are here!” She spoke in Korean, which always made her grandparents smile.

Mr. Song was taken aback by the long haired girl in the denim skirt and pink top who came rushing to him with arms open wide. She was the image of her mother at that age.

Hyun Ae? Is that you?”

Yes, Grandfather” She bowed. “I am Hyun Ae”

Mr. Song returned the bow. “Well, come here, jakeun sonyu(little girl)! Give your grandfather a hug!”

She hugged her grandfather with her whole body. Mr. Song had never seen Kwan this happy. She gave her grandmother an equally intense hug. “I’m so happy you are going to be here for Christmas. I know you like to go to Korea, so this is special!”

Mrs. Song kneeled and kissed Hyun. “Well, Hyun Ae. You are a special girl from what I hear. This will be your first Christmas as a girl, won’t it?”

Jung came out of the house. “Mom! Dad! Hi! Thanks for coming!” She rushed to her father and gave him a hug, and did the same to her mother. “So, lets get you unpacked”

“Where’s Justin?” asked Mr. Song.

Jung sighed. “At the attorney’s office, I think. He had an appointment for this afternoon, among other things”

“So his parents are going ahead with this court nonsense?” asked Mrs. Song.

“I’m afraid so, Mom. They have been so hateful since Justin called them. I wish he hadn’t lost his temper with them”

“Justin’s parents need to learn the old Korean proverb. “An empty cart rattles the loudest”

“What does that mean, Dad?”

“He who talks most, knows least. They speak and act before they know. Dangerous combination”

“Hyun, take grammie’s little bag into the guest room, okay?”

“’Kay Mommy” She skipped into the house.

“I’m worried, daddy. She is so innocent. I’m afraid for her”

“She is young and pure in heart. All this must end sooner or later, the good will either remain or it won’t. This depends on you. You know this, Jung”

“I know, daddy. Tears brimmed in her eyes. I just hate that Justin’s parents are so narrow minded. They are helping to hurt my baby. I expect that from strangers, but her own grandparents?”

“They will reap what they sow now, Jung. They have known nothing but privilege. To be thwarted is something they don’t know. This will be a good lesson for them”

“I hope so. I just wish Justin would get home. I’m dying to find out what is happening”

Mrs. Song hugged her daughter “You’ll know soon enough, dear. This will all work out. You’ve chosen a difficult path, but I think you chose the lesser of two difficult paths”

“Thanks, Mom. Let’s get you inside, and we can have some tea”

Justin arrived home and filled everyone in on the developments of the day. “…So it seems we have a strong case, and Kate is very confident of a win. I hate that it has come to this, but Mom and Dad chose this”

“When do you think it will come to a trial?” asked Jung.

“If it does, and that’s a big if right now, it won’t be until February or later. The wheels of justice grind slowly”

Mr. Song spoke quietly. “Let’s not speak of this anymore. What will happen has already been determined. It is for us to see what that outcome is. We should just enjoy the season, and not let bad thoughts ruin it”

“Agreed. Jung, what’s for supper?”

“Mom’s kimchee for one. Hyun Ae asked for it”

Justin’s countenance dropped. “Oh, wonderful”

Mr. and Mrs. Song laughed. “You’ll never be a true son of mine until you learn to like our national dish. We eat it almost every day”

“Well Dad, It’s not like I haven’t tried to like it, and it’s quite apparent that that particular dish is responsible for growing beautiful women, but I just don’t get it”

Jung playfully punched Justin’s arm. “Listen, big boy, if I didn’t love you so much, you’d get it every day. What a sissy!”

Hyun heard the word kimchee from her room. “Yay! Kimchee!”

Justin looked at Jung. “I guess old ‘dog ears’ in there heard what she wanted to hear”

They ate and enjoyed the Korean meal of kimchee, oritang (duck stew), and spicy bibimbap, a rice dish with egg, beef, spinach, zucchini, and cucumber.

There was plenty, and even Justin had his fill, and true to his word, he had none of the kimchee, giving his portion to Hyun.

After the meal was cleaned up, Justin and Mr. Song retreated to the back porch to enjoy a beer. The women went to the living room to chat, Hyun right along with them.

“You know, Jung, it might be time to get little Hyun her first chima jeogori. She would look so cute. She’s still so tiny, she’d look like a doll”

A chima jeogori a skirt and blouse combination that Korean women wear. Some look at it as the national dress of Korea.
Hyun looked at her mother with amazement. “Really? I ‘d love that, Mommy!”

Jung winked at her mother, “Well, I don’t know mom…It’s awfully girly. I know she doesn’t like to look too sweet”

“MOMMY! I am a girl! Pleeeease! I was looking at one in my book. They’re what we girls wear”

Jung could hold her laughter back no longer. “Okay, honey, you win! We’ll make you one. My mommy made my first one, and I’ll make yours”

Mrs. Song was pleased. “I can see my sewing lessons weren’t in vain”

“Are you kidding? You’ve seen my sewing room?”

“I know sweetie, it’s just nice our little tradition is continuing”

Hyun snuggled up to her grandmother, reading an American Girl magazine. More accurately she was looking at the pictures.

“What do you think about this whole thing, Mom?”

“If Hyun is happy, then so am I. I’ve got to admit she is taking to this with a lot of enthusiasm” She was stroking Hyun’s long black hair. Hyun’s eyes were starting to droop. “I just want you to train her on all aspects of being a female. It’s not all clothes and pretty things”

“She knows, Mom. That’s why I know this is right. She isn’t wrapped up in clothes, and acting all girly. It’s who she is. I’m not very good at explaining myself. It’s just right. I’m just glad we discovered this now”

“Well you take care of her, my girl. Remember your lessons, and pass them on!”

The doorbell rang, and Jung rose to answer it. A man in a cheap suit was at the door, and handed Jung an envelope. “You’ve been served. Merry Christmas!”

Jung looked strangely at the man, and closed the door. “Justin! Come here!”

Justin and her father came into the front room. Jung handed him the envelope. Justin opened it and quickly read it. “Dammit!” he said through clenched teeth. “Mom and Dad are accusing us of child abuse!”

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Comments

Internet

Don't Justin's parents even know to look for transgender descriptins on the net, it is medically described.

good question.

This story is taking place in 1993. In the first chapter, it's revealed that Kwan was born in 1988. Now I'm a little bit young to actually remember that time, but I think it wasn't the big thing it is now, right? Am I wrong?

Peace!
Cindilee

Peace!
Cindilee

No you are right. It was

No you are right. It was still not really talked about. It was worse as a child of the 60's. I still remember my mother referring to my girlish behavior as a stage. lol

Maybe they were still murdering us.

My you did pick a tough row to hoe girl. You are placing this family in the position of being ground breaking pioneers. And, I think there is a real danger that in 1993 a charge of child abuse might gain some support.

By 1993, I knew that I was TG but did not actually come out until 2004. I thought it was evil and to be prayed away. Little did I know that it could not just be prayed away.

This is going to be battle in the trenches, and I hope the child is not hurt to badly. I'd be really worried about custodial interference and even kidnapping, or snatching the child from school.

Gwendolyn

Now you're getting it!

The hardest part about writing it is I'm the same age as Hyun! I don't remember a lot of this stuff.

Peace!
Cindilee

Peace!
Cindilee

Start of the internet

I remember that in 1993/1994 the first e-mail via UUCP was made available here in my country in the heart of South America for an exhorbitant fee. It was in 1997 that I got my first dial-up conection to the internet (each ISP had to install their own satelite ground station) with initially custom software for e-mails and web surfing. Having to pay long distance phone bills was a real pain. And initially the readily available information about gender variance on the web was porn. The initial "search engines" or "web directories" where Yahoo, Altavista and Lycos. In my memory, Google started to gain prominence only around 2005 or so.

Growing up in the 1970s and especially the 1980s, I had to rely on reading dictionaries and outdated encyclopedias to find a diagnosis for my own issues. Though I remember at age 11 praying earnestly every night for several months that I might wake up in the morning as a girl. Ever since my confidence in an allmighty and loving God has been on shaky ground.

Jessica

well, I think you're beautiful!

And you are a girl where it counts to me, inside! South American girls are the BOMB! :)
Things have gotten a lot better for information now, and porn sucks for info and everything else.

Peace!
Cindilee

Peace!
Cindilee

Thank you, Cindilee,

ALISON

Certainly not as much as now, but as my late mother used to say "there are none so blind as those who will not see". They don't understand and they don't want to and will not accept that which is different to what they
think is "normal" and normal is how they want people to be,just like them!! Child abuse, I don't think, so but
that is the way they see it not realizing that what they want to do with the child is exactly that,child abuse.
No wonder the incidence of suicide is so high amongst transsexual people.

ALISON

Alison,

You are too right!

Peace!
Cindilee

Peace!
Cindilee

"50 percent attempt suicide"

That figure is probably low. Great story, I hope they can succeed in protecting her from the grandparents.

Dorothycolleen, member of Bailey's Angels

DogSig.png

I wouldn't be surprised either.

And that's not counting the ones scarred for life emotionally.

Peace!
Cindilee

Peace!
Cindilee

What Did We Do Wrong? Chapter 6

They are cowards!

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Fat chance

Social Services are happy with the family situation, medical professionals are happy with the family situation, one set of grandparents is happy with the family situation, one set of neighbours is happy with the family situation.

If the judge has any sense he'll collect statements from the various agencies involved with the family, look at them and on that basis throw the case out. Let's hope they don't have to resort to getting the media on-side.


As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!