Anchors Aweigh – 16 With the End in Sight

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Anchors Aweigh – 16
With the End in Sight


By Jessica C


=^_^=~


Dr. Wright was very nice and easy to talk to. She put me at ease and would encourage me not to make any drastic changes. “Since Dort and Rose’s demise was partly responsible for your episode twice over. I recommend that they remain as appropriate for the time being. If that is alright with you I will send that as a recommendation to the School’s Principal and Psychologist. You’ll remain here most of the day just for observation until your doctors here release you.”

She said, “I was moved that another patient was impressed with you as another woman to let you be with her at such a precious time for her.”

I said, “I was surprised too, I thought it would have been a time she wouldn’t want others there. She was probably joking but she said she might call me to babysit in a few months.”

“The way she said goodbye to you, indicated to me she saw you as a girl worthy of what she said. All that I’ve seen published about you indicate you’re respected by the public and those who have come to know you recently.

“I want you to take the coming days, to respect and enjoy who you are. Let each day take care of itself.”

There was a knock at the door, as I asked who it was, Principal Evans identified herself. Dr. Wright invited her in and said, “We were just talking about you and I said, I’d be happy to talk to you about Rose. I’m a little surprised you found Rose as we expected most would be asking for Robert who never became a patient.”

Dr. Wright looked and me, and I nodded that we could talk openly. The short of it was, Principal Evans knew it was not only okay but preferable that I continue as Dort and Rose Anderson along with being Robert.

Dr. Wright left and as I visited with Amanda Evans, it felt strangely nice becoming a friend of hers. Like people seeing me, Robert as Rose; seeing Principal Evans as a friend was seeing her in a new light.

I was able to use her pen to write my name and phone number after our visit I walked down with her to the baby nursery. I took my note and went to Tiffany’s room. I gave her the note, saying, “If you would actually consider asking me to be a babysitter this is my name and number.”

We again enjoyed a visit and Tiffany Streep asked. “Would you be willing to come a few weeks early so Megan can be comfortable with you and you come to know where things are in the house?”

I knew not to stay long and went back to my room. Sierra and Sonja were the first of the family to come. Mom and Dad actually were visiting with Dr. Caruthers. The three of them soon came to my room. Dr. Caruthers said, “Rose I am releasing you, but as I told your parents. I want you to take it easy today. I guess there is an afternoon gathering in town to formally welcome the Girl Destroyers. You can go, but no cheerleading and you are to take it easy. Can you do that or should they take you home and you stay there?”

“Can I at least be standing with the Cheer Team?” Dad was shaking his head, but Sierra came over to me. “Dad, I’ll be with her. You need to allow Robert, Rose to have that time. You saw her last night. You know if anyone earned that right it has been Rose.”

Dad and Mom smiled and agreed. It was like Sierra had loosened a knot in my stomach.

Sonja held up some clothes on hangers and a bag with shoes and the extras that I needed. I took a shower and was soon dressed and with Sierra and Sonja’s help back to looking normal.

We walked to Tiffany’s room, but when I saw she too had company I turned around. Then a man coming out of the room asked, “Are you that one that I heard about? …Tiffany’s mentioned you, so I was hoping to see you. Tiff has a knack of meeting special people. I want you to know, we’re looking forward to seeing you in the future.” He and I hugged and I even gave him a kiss on the cheek as I said goodbye. I find myself doing girl things that I wouldn’t have imagined before.

Once we were on our way out of the hospital Dad said, “I don’t understand that. You actually kissed another man on the cheek in saying ‘Goodbye’.”

I shook my head and just walked on.

=^_^=~

We were half an hour early for the Destroyers’ Rally. The girls’ team had been driven on a firetruck from the park south of town and around with sirens and lights. I forewent the mania outside and was inside with Anne and Therese Jeters courtside.

It was nice as Trish and Kaylea saw me, they and the Cheer team quickly came over and gave me hugs. They went up on the platform and I gathered with the Cheer Team on the floor in front of them.

I hadn’t noticed it until Coach Cathy Daley mentioned the light shining on the Spirit of the Destroyers’ painting and pointed to ‘the Rope’ hanging in the rafters. Jaylene Fox presented two large bouquets of roses from the Ship and crew of USS Cook.

There was no doubt left that this was the prelude to a larger celebration. Coach Daley was cautious and pointed out that a State Championship is uncertain. “We are a small team for Class 2A. It will be very helpful for us to have a better than average fan base when we get t continue in the sub-state playoffs.” It was then that I jumped and kicked up my feet with the Cheerleaders. I wasn’t in uniform, but it felt great. Feeling the bruises from the fall at the game was minor in comparison.

After the rally, Coach Daley came up to me, “I am sorry for not acknowledging you and what you have done. Please know I was plenty proud of you down at the end of the bench. …I was also proud when you showed respect to the senior girls on the Saints team. That had to be a hard way for them to end their season. You made it a little better for them. It helped silence the ‘nay Sayers’ in their crowd.”

I grinned, “I can only say, I learned a lot from you and your team coach. That maturity wasn’t in me before all of this began.”

There was added joy for me when I saw little Marie run up to me with Audrene Trullo following her. Audrene was sorry to hear I was in the hospital until I mentioned being on the OB floor. I was holding Marie on my hip as Audrene and I talked.

She said, “Sonja told me the good news that you continue to like being Rose. I didn’t see it coming when all this started, but I’m delighted in seeing you Rose. You’ve glowed more and more as Rose became you. I wouldn’t have seen it as natural unless I and others hadn’t seen it with our own eyes slowly changing you.”

“Sonja said you might already have a job as a babysitter. I will have to have you babysit Marie a few more times before I go to the hospital. You could watch Marie when I go to the hospital but I’m afraid the grandmothers would be upset and feel slighted. You do come after them where Marie is concerned.”

When I felt a need to sit from being worn down, I knew I needed to pace myself and eat more regularly. Audrene had me sit down, she said, “We should spend some more time addressing girl talk. I have noticed and I’m sure more of the girls on the basketball and cheer teams have noticed, you are more natural in talking with the others. With the exception of some who are growing interested in you with affection, the others are seeing you like another girl and no longer as Robert. Even your appearance and interest in fashions are like another girl.”

“Mrs. Trullo, I know that should embarrass me more than it does. I’ve been more afraid of my parents, mostly my Dad stopping me now or after the season ends. I know, I’ll eventually have to go back to being Robert. But I’ll be eternally grateful to have this experience. As you said, I’ve learned fashion, makeup, doing my makeup, and more, but most of all how I see things. …Sitting on the bench and watching Ms. Daley guide her players in maturing as women and seeing a larger picture. Then having you and Coach House helping me; I’ve developed a desire in being the best woman possible. And I have trouble translating that into being Robert.”

Sunday evening the Cheer Team would be with the basketball team to review the game film on the teams they would be playing. Coach Daley said she received word on the next two games and their opponents.

Therese and I had gone to church together in the morning, but Therese had made an exception and was coming to my church.

=^_^=~

There was a surprise when I got home. Shannon was home. She decided to come home to study for mid-semester exams. While it was true about her studies. Mom and Dad asked her for help in talking to me. Dr. Caruthers had talked to my sisters’ doctor who I had seen once since this all began.

Shannon invited me up to her room, “Rose, you and I need to have a serious conversation. Dr. Cooley’s office called and wants to see you during your lunch break on Monday. Ms. Cooley is the one I prefer to see, so I think that part is good. I understand she got a call from your Dr. Caruthers and you approved their communicating with each other which was also good. The concern being the weight you’ve lost, where it came from, and the word that your breasts have more fatty tissue around them.”

I couldn’t help but smile a little. I knew it had happened but I stopped eating junk food, and I wasn’t surprised that wearing a bra as much as I have would do it. I didn’t know it was a problem as there was little difference in the way they felt. One boob was hurt when I crashed to avoid the St. Peter’s player.

Shannon looked across to me, “Rob, I understand as Rose you don’t mind the changes, but these disks were found in our room and they aren’t mine. I’m afraid wearing a gaff and using these pills alone shouldn’t be powerful enough, but doing both might have changed things enough to affect your production of testosterone as well as your female hormones.”

I said, “I looked it up on the internet that the birth control pills don’t contain enough hormones to make a difference.”

Shannon had her tablet on and I knew I was going to get a lesson or two. She asked, “Did you know a man wearing something tight around his testes can reduce the production of testosterone because of body heat, that adolescent boys also produced female hormones. Dad told me that if you reduced the testosterone enough and that the pills increased your female hormones enough that change could be significant. Any prolonged use of female hormones could change your testosterone production permanently.”

Suddenly, I wasn’t sure if I might have created a monster or if it was an answer to prayer, but I wasn’t sure any longer than I wanted it. “Dad doesn’t think it had gotten close to that point or thought it was much of a possibility.”

I could tell in the coming days that he wasn’t thrilled that I chose to continue at times to be Rose.

Everyone thought the coming two games would not be much of a challenge. That was with the exception of Coach Daley and her team. She was correct in that Bridgeton played with the energy of a possessed team.

Schoolwork was hard for me to stay focused on until Coach Daley threw me in with her players’ study times. She had a B average standard for her starters. She had extra tutoring for those who weren’t academically inclined to do well. I about went crazy the first day as I could not talk unless it was about my studies.

Trish Dunlavy’s boyfriend broke up with her just before the playoffs began. He said he couldn’t live with her 8 o’clock curfew for another three weeks. Trisha was direct in asking me to go with her places so she wasn’t alone. Once when we were up in her room, we snuggled and I learned how close she wanted to be.

Their contest against Mountain View High was more like a team scoring contest. Even our fans pretty much lost interest by the end of the third quarter. The plus for me was, I felt fully recovered and able to do all my moves. Both my parents and Coach House forbid me to do my flips or anything at a fast speed.

=^_^=~

My second appointment with Dr. Cooley included the results of previous blood tests from the hospital. I was also to take in a disk of pills I had been using. I was able to exchange my disk with someone who got theirs from their college program. I was fairly sure my disk was military issued and I did not want to taint that relationship.

Dr. Cooley was forthright, “I was pretty sure the ones you were taking we slightly stronger than these. Your test results indicate you have a higher amount of female hormones in you and your testosterone is on the low side of normal for a boy your age.”

“I will ask you once again was this something you have been wanting and working towards.”

I said, “I’ve stopped taking the birth control pills, but I plan to do everything else as I have been through the state tournament. That includes using the gaff and hiding my boy parts.”

She took an extra ten minutes and we casually visited about what a boy finds interesting as a girl. She asked if I was in the high school’s LGBT Club. I said yes, and she laughed when I said I am even attending it more regularly again.

She not only gave me the information about prolonged use of estrogen but took time to explain it. What was to be an extra ten minutes went twenty minutes into her lunch time.

=^_^=~

This weekend we would play at the larger gymnasium of the state university for the District championship. With the expected victory, next week the Destroyers would be playing for the region championship and the goal of being one of eight to make it to the state playoffs.

We were to have a rally come Tuesday, so I was back to being Rose. A welcome break from Rob’s clothes. I traded my last disk of pills with Trish Dunlavy, saying to myself, ‘All good things must come to an end.’ I wasn’t really sure what that meant, other than these pills would last through the tournament games.

We had heard from the USS Cook. They would soon be moving out of the Mediterranean Sea and heading for England. Part of it was to do a naval exercise with the British Navy and then to have liberty after that in England. Deb said it would include giving up her Med. tan and switching over to the weather complexion of the British Isles.

Seeing pictures of her tan as well as those of others, became an excuse for shopping for summer swimsuits. With my gaff in place, I have tagged along to the mall to be part of the search. Most, including myself, were surprised to see how good I could look so scantily clad. I had tried on a few swimsuits but wasn’t buying any. Anne, Therese, and Trish had different ideas and received donations to purchase me two swimsuits; one of them from Victoria Secrets.

Thankfully, it was a one-piece fashionably made. Sierra and Shannon were home and amused themselves teasing me about my swimsuits.

I was back to doing all my flips and tumbles.

Beating Pennington to gain entrance to the Regional Championship game was the toughest challenge to date. We were shy two starters due to fouls come the last three minutes of the game. Sharon and Sandy had done the more spectacular moves to that point. I was now asked to do my best two backward flips. But Ms. House was adamant that I was to stop after the first rather than risk injury. While the Cheer team was doing a cheer calling for our fans to stand and cheer. I began my run. One backward hand flip, into a standing backward flip. Catching my breath in midair I ended with a forward flip and then going into a front and rear leg split.

Its purpose drove attention away from me, to rally the fans behind our girls. Coach Daley would later mention Erin Se and Aronia’s play off the bench caught Pennington by surprise. Pennington had more tightly covered the other players daring Erin and Aronia to shoot the baskets. They would make six of seven and all three three-point shots, as well as four from the foul line. The final score did not indicate how tough Pennington had played.

I was emotionally down to tears, come the end of the game. Coach Daley patted me, and said, “That will probably scare the team enough to play hard and win the championship. I want to thank you, Rose. Your jumps probably enable those girls to relax and do their best. …When you communicate to the Ship make sure you thank them for being behind us. I felt their presence tonight.”

Hope High School was a challenge for the regional championship, but unfortunately, they played against a rejuvenated team of Destroyers. My father asked how I could maintain by girl's voice under the stain of so many games. Only Shannon knew what I was afraid to confess that for now, it was my regular voice.

Being Rose was as much a need as a desire. Three games in four nights awaited the top two teams at state for each level. The Jersey edition of the Inquirer, as well as the Newark and Jersey City papers, decried the attention our class of schools was getting. Truthfully, the larger schools were worthy of the attention they would get, but so were we.

New uniforms for the basketball team had arrived and as desirable as they were via appearance, Coach Daley turned down their use for now. “We’re not about ready to changing uniforms for chancing our winning ways in these.” The beauty of not changing the uniforms would be that the players could keep their jerseys as mementos.

=^_^=~

Unfortunately for me, Shannon had to be back at her university and could not be my roommate in Atlantic City. Sierra would miss three classes but no exams, so she was willing to be my chaperone. Being there the first night with the basketball team, cost us, Cheerleaders, our own money.

Pool pictures of me would cause a new round of foul-minded critics.

I did receive a new satin blouse with a tied front from the women of the Cook. It was a new look for me to show some of my midsection. The cheer season had been nice to me. I did not have quite the look of the other cheerleaders, but there was no sign betraying me as a boy.

With Audrene Trullo coaching how I handle myself under such pressure; my critics were the ones’ receiving their own criticism. I was blessed to have the unwavering support of Coach House and Principal Evens.

I was told by some, but I never knew if it was true or not that they were under pressure and threats ranging from discipline to the loss of their jobs. Sierra’s statement that I was not responsible for what happened to either of them was little consolation to me.

Unable able to sleep that night, I went out to the hall; having found no one there and no change for the vending machines. I decided to go down to the lobby to get change for my ten-dollar bill. Upon stepping out of the elevator, I was soon pushed back into the elevator and was accosted.

By the time I was found and becoming conscious again; someone in authority asked if it was true? I guess a note had been sent down with me on the elevator. I cried, “You’re going by some lewd note, how about me?”

To be continued…

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Comments

Dad has to make up his mind now.

Monique S's picture

Does he want a seriously depressed son with suicidal tendencies or a healthy daughter?

He needs to start to support and encourage her, now's the time after the assault. After all someone did physically, what he was (is?) doing mentally. Why does he not want to see what most of the females see? I hope Shannon explains it to him.

Monique.

Monique S

Some how I get the feeling

Samantha Heart's picture

Rose's dad my be behind Rose being sexuly acusted. Some people NEVER learn! The aithorties are blaming the VICTUM not the suspect who did it & apparently left a VERY NASTY LUDE note behind. I feel for Rose she never asked for this to happen. She just wants to be her self.

Love Samantha Renée Heart.

I was abused just a little

When I was in the navy a female airman learned about my status as a virgin. She basically raped me. I was not that attracted to her and it led to my depression and finally coming out as bisexual. The result of that was me receiving an other than honorable discharge. Victims are often ignored when they are different.

EllieJo Jayne

Understanding and empathy

Thanks, ElliJo', I'm not sure what a little abuse is, but I'm honored you spoke up here. Rose's dilemma is whoever attacked her and her father, try to justify things for what they want to believe.

Hugs, Jessie C

Jessica E. Connors

Jessica Connors

I had a bit

Wendy Jean's picture

of trouble interpreting those last two paragraphs. Rose was attacked, then accused by someone of doing something wrong? By Who? I think more information was needed there. Still loving the story.

Now who's doing what?

Jamie Lee's picture

Rose taking the pills should signal to someone that being Rose wants to stay, and that by changing her body no one could deny Rose staying.

Changes in Robert as Rose have been seen by those around her, with only a very few refusing to see how much better a person she is as Rose.

So who attacked her in the elevator? Was it planned by someone who hated the fact a boy was living as a girl? Or was it closer to home in an attempt to show Rose the dangers girls can face and force her to return to being Robert?

If what occurred was instigated from home, and it's learned that's why it happened, not only is a marriage over but someone is going to jail.

Others have feelings too.

accosted

Rose was accosted and had a note pinned to her, there is no mention of sexual assault although I think the note would indicate she was offering sexual favors which where turned down in a violent manner. As to who attacked her we have no indication if she saw or knew her attacker.
Dad is an asshole yes, I doubt he would do it. Who ever did do it had to have had knowledge she was on her own and vulnerable, how, her sister Sierra could have tipped them off, very unlikely. More like hotel employs watching security systems telling the attacker who has been siting around waiting with their thumb up their ass for god knows how long in the hopes of getting her alone. As to why, just plain hatred for trans gendered people or someone associated with one of the upcoming teams to put the destroyers off their game but until they are found we wont know.

legofun