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Get your minds out of the gutter, because what I need is someone who is willing to talk about how it feels to be attracted to another woman. I know I have my own experiences, but I'm not sure how much having male bits changes that equation, if it does at all. Do you get lust at first sight or is attraction a slower process? Do you find you have a physical "type"? Is there a part of the female body that gets your motor running, as it were? If anyone is, or knows a GG lesbian willing to share, let me know.
Come now Dorothy.
You are a woman by nature. You have plenty of Estrogen running through your brain, especially when your new double dose gets to work. Why should your attraction to other women be fundamentally different to that of a "naturally female" lesbian?
I don't get your reasoning here.
*Comforting HuggleSnugglePurr*
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BCTS's resident Extravagant Honorable Trans-Cat-MegaTomboy! ;D ...But I do like cuddles from soft but strong arms... ^_^
You should change your name...
...to Extravagance and WISE!
I'm a girl, no matter what lurks down below, and I'm attracted to my wife because she's simply a beautiful caring woman. Physiological adjustments might present themselves someday, but my heart is attracted as much for commonality and oneness as for any other reason. I took up residence on that mythical island of Lesbos a long time ago; I just didn't know where my psychic sailboat had set ground, and I wasn't aware of my enlistment in their Navy, either. You rock, girl!
Dio vi benedica tutti
Con grande amore e di affetto
Andrea Lena
Love, Andrea Lena
^_^
Very nice of you to say so, Auntie 'Drea. ^_^
*HuggleSnugglePurr* <3
It would look rather blow-your-own-trumpet in my username or signature though.
I seem to spout occasional wisdom, but most of the time I'm daydreaming about prawns and fit women. =)
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BCTS's resident Extravagant Honorable Trans-Cat-MegaTomboy! ;D ...But I do like cuddles from soft but strong arms... ^_^
Based on...
Based on conversations with my cousin...
The things that attract me to women are similar to what attracts my cousin to women. Oh, there are superficial cosmetic preference differences - but, she and I both agree on many things there.
The big things are what the person feels like - emotionally. It's not a logical thing at all. One interesting thing was that the person we were attracted to emotionally did not resemble the person we'd prefer we looked like. So, there's obviously more kinds of attraction out there than just the one.
Another difference - she had to work out in head - that she actually did prefer women. (We both were brought up believing homosexuality was evil (and that trans were just sick or worse). I didn't have that issue... I was always attracted to women. :-) (Different kinds of attractions at different ages...)
All that said - I suspect that if you ask 20 different lesbians what attracted them to others you'd get at least 19 different answers (assuming they answered you and didn't turn the question somewhere else). If you really want to try to understand this my best suggestion is to go to a local LGBT group, explain why you want to know, and if any are willing have some long conversations.
Good Luck,
Anne
Well said...
I particularly liked the part about "if you ask 20 different lesbians what attracted them to others you'd get at least 19 different answers"...
I am bi, and was in several lesbian relationships before I married my husband... but as best as I can recall, each of my (GG) lesbian lovers had very different motivations and turn-on's...
As for myself... well, technically I am not a "GG lesbian"... but I transitioned a couple decades back (and live stealth), so in may ways I have noticed that I have long since become pretty much a typical woman. If you are curious, the following is my own thoughts on the matter...
As a bisexual "lipstick lesbian" myself, I was mostly attracted to butch "diesel dyke" lesbians... but the attraction was slower, and not really physical -- and I was perfectly willing to date other lipstick lesbians rather than dykes, if things worked out that way. As with many bisexuals, for me it is about being attracted to the person's personality... rather than anything purely physical. That said... and mentioned only because it was specifically asked about... I suppose I could say that while I am not really "turned on" by the sight of any particular part of female anatomy... taken as a *whole*, I *am* aesthetically attracted to the elegant gracefulness of the female body, and "turned off" by things that mar that overall appearance. [Tattoo's, scars, etc.] But that is a pretty mild turn off -- I have dated women with tattoo's, even if I would have preferred they not have had it...
Similarly on the physical type thing, I prefer physically strong women who are larger than me... but I have dated a really petite lesbian, too. It is just a mild preference, not an absolute.
For me, it is about the personality -- not the body.
By the way... that petite lesbian? I dated her when I was still pre-op -- technically, still a man... albeit, one with breasts. She was an absolute "man-hater"... and yet, did not mind my physical "problem". I asked her why, once, and if I recall correctly (it has been a long time, now), I think she said that I simply did not *feel* like a man to her. That I felt so much like a woman to her, that my physical situation did not matter to her. If I remember correctly, she mentioned that she was originally attracted to me because of my own "graceful femininity" -- she had been dating a more butch type, whose lack of care about their appearance had begun to grate on her. [The petite lesbian was herself somewhere in the middle... not really a lipstick lesbian, but not super butch either. I never saw her in a dress, but she was always well groomed, in somewhat masculine, but female to "at most" androgynous clothing... and she even wore a little makeup on a regular basis...]
By the way... there are two major "types" of lesbians, beyond the physical "lipstick" versus "dyke" thing. Some lesbians are born that way... while a fairly substantial minority are *made*, rather than born. The "man-hater" I just mentioned, for example, started dating other women after being repeatedly sexually assaulted and generally abused by males. And indeed, I had some rather unpleasant experiences with men (see my story "Summer's End", if you are curious), that resulted in my own going back to being a "pure" lesbian for a while. Something I mention, as the motivations and attractions of the two groups tend to be a bit different...
[As an aside... the high prevalence rate of previously abused lesbians is something to be strongly cautious of, when dating lesbians. Some manage to move beyond their past... others fall into a cycle of abuse. By which I mean, there is actually a very high incidence rate of abusive relationships *between* lesbians... often as a result of the prior abuse some of the women involved have experienced...]
Anyway, I hope something in this was useful to you...
Oh, not a Governor General?
And here I was thinking you wanted a Governor General who was also a lesbian. Huh. Well, anyway in answer to your question it really doesn't matter. Having "male bits" really only means you had testosterone in your body in greater quantities than a "GG" would. That only affects your sex drive, which can change under the influence of oestrogen.
Your "partialisms," so to speak, are not affected by hormones. That is to say, the body parts you are sexually attracted to are NOT gender specific nor hormone specific. What arouses you could also arouse other men and women. It has nothing to do with your genetic gender.
I realise you're only trying to better understand yourself but I think you're focusing far too much on TG's vs. GG's. The only difference between the two is one got the body they wanted when they were born. Mentally, sexually, personality-wise, etc., women are women no matter how they were born. Experiences shape personality, sure, but women are still women.
that's the answer I was hoping for
as a person who has struggled with the question "Am I really a girl?" I was hoping to find some reassurance that what I am is at least possible. Thank you to all who answered, both privately and publicly.
Dorothycolleen, member of Bailey's Angels
'Regular' Girls
First off all this is second hand or a first hand observation. Got, love unconventional teachers.
The 2 GG's I knew in college that when for other girls and happen to have science lab on attractions, seemed to prefer a good figure and round or plump rear. By good figure I mean not flat of the side and front so, a+ cup. So, it many ways they have some of the same vision cues as a man to a woman. The slope has to be in aspect ratio to the hip:waist:bust. For the rear end is has to be not to full, if you can rest a test cup or more on it it is too much. I happen to agree with there answers to that lab, so I happen to remember them. So, curves and a peasant bottom.
As for personally and morals that is a question you have to ask a perspective other about. If she sees you as a girl and finds you attractive then that is a good start off point to make a more serious date and then from there a better relationship. So, be nice about it and you ask not demand "do, you see me a girl?", and often the the few I have ever had the gut to question will be pretty honest about their view of you. I once ask a neighbor girl that and she said "NO" (which hurt) but knowing me she was not surprised I may see my self that way, because emotional we connected much like her and another girl, friend.
"Sometimes you need a little space to grow up or start over"- Me
I'm just a transgender girl too...
However, I personally find that I'm not much interested in a persons looks. As long as they keep themselves reasonably fit and not obese, bathe regularly, and don't do anything drastic to mar their natural appearance, I'm good on that.
Generally, though, the people who I'd be attracted to in the first place are going to be all the above physically...
BTW, I'm bi, but lean more strongly towards attraction to males.
And what attracts me is personality. Kindness, compassion, quietly strong without being arrogant. Arrogant men can be kinda cute though... but I'm not going to even consider a relationship with one.
I'm attracted to the same personality traits in women.
So, in short, I guess I'm attracted to the "protector" type.
That said, I've had attraction build over time, and also just be instinctual. So I do understand something like "love at first sight", but it's not really physical vision, but the first time our spirits touch.
And that's really what my poem "Month in a Moment" included in Chapter 2 of "Open Your Heart" is about. That instantaneous emotional bond that sometimes forms between people who seem to be very different... (and no, I've never actually had the courage to actually admit my attraction to anyone directly... probably never will unless they admit theirs towards me first, which seems not to be in my cards atm.)
Well, that's what makes me tick, I dunno about anyone else. I've heard that for many people raw physical attraction is more common.
Abigail Drew.
Sharing is good .....
Hmm -- okay --- fact check here. Checking contents of underwear - they may be tighty-whities but those are girl bits swaddled therein -- mark an X in the GG column. Lesbian -- Trap glances over at GF Sparky curled up on the couch napping and looking ever so heavenly -- oh yes -- no doubt -- X in that column!
So here's how my girlfriend Sparly and I met.
My GF Sparky and I met in college. I was very much a sort of soft baby-dyke at the time, a tomboy in formation. I liken it to my tomboy puberty.
So I was at a GLBT union mixer and we're all standing around staring at each other. I see this person enter the room. The person had a certain air about them, and at first sight of the short haircut, shirt, tie and khakis, I thought the person was a twinky gay guy. The lack of a bulge in the crotch of the pants told me otherwise. This was Sparky.
That night I circled her like a moon around a planet. Then finally as she went for a coffee I moved in. I am very 'smell' aware and I recall she had fresh scent about her -- a kind of boys lockerroom clean mixed with Irish Spring soap.
Launch into stupid small talk mode. For some strange reason I found myself hanging around her the rest of the night. Eventually we walked back to the dorms together.
Walk led to coffee a few days later. Coffee led to a date. Date led to sex. All of this was wrappered in finding out that we had a lot in common, gender play, underwear fetish, turned on by gay boy sex, etc -- but she was a lot more daring and advanced than me.
Eventually we moved into an apartment together and of course share the same bed, closet, and chest of drawers.
Physical type -- slim with small breasts, short hairy, boyish well toned frame.
Part of the female body that gets me going -- breasts, go figure. Ah -- but small ones! I like flat chested girls. I will also admit to having a 'thing' for, ahem, er, ah, shall we say, females gifted in the clitoris department.
To be fair, whilst I am not str8, and have never had str8 sex, in a guy I find femininity so very hot. I don't mean over the top drag queen femininity, but soft girlishness. Go figure. These types of guys look so hot in bras and panties. An din my upside down world, that's exactly how it should be.
Staying strapped
Trap