You don't say where you are but there are some places where it's better to be, and it sounds like you're not there. Consider arranging your life so that change is easier.

In the USA, Boston is by far the lesbian (and by extension, transgender) friendly town I know, although San Francisco runs a close second, less so mostly because of the very high housing costs.

The City of San Francisco was the first major employer in the USA to offer reassignment surgery under its insurance plan, for example, as does the University of California generally, but a few major employers in the private sector do the same these days.

If the people around you aren't your type of people, it's rarely amiss to consider moving to wherever *your* crowd congregates, wherever that might be, just as you'd probably consider moving to Aspen if you were an avid skier, or to Hawai'i if swimming around semi-tropical lagoons with fins and snorkel is what you want to be doing every weekend. That's what I like, so that's where I am, but I've lived near the ocean for most of my adult life and find it hard to be happy if I can't at least dip my toes in from time to time. Saltwater therapy, I call it.

On the other hand:

http://tinyurl.com/9lurst

Feisty is my middle name.

Puddin'
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When a woman does it, it's "pushy;" but
when a man does it, it's "making sure
that proper credit is awarded when due."