Whisper - Chapter 13

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Whisper
by Sleethr

~o~O~o~

 

Note: I re-added the phone call and some additional supporting behind the scenes storyline back into this chapter. Enjoy.

 

Insert standard disclaimer here: The one that reminds everyone that this is a work of fiction. No one is real and any resemblance to someone who is real is just the reader's imagination. This is also a Fan Fiction set in the Whately Story Universe. No Canon characters were permanently harmed in the making of this story. I hope. :)

 

 

** Chapter 13 **

 

Jennifer sits on the couch comfortably against her husband, Dave, while watching their favorite TV show when a commercial for laundry soap starts to play at high volume.  She sighs with relief as Dave quickly hits the mute button.  One of these days, she thinks that they should figure out how to use the DVR the kids seem to like so much.  Both of the kids are upstairs playing or studying in their rooms.  Everything would be perfect if she wasn’t feeling so worried about Brian. She felt like something was wrong, but her powers just weren’t reliable or strong enough for her to know for sure.  She knows that she has some kind of power inside of her.  She can sometimes feel with absolute certainty when someone is lying to her or is in serious pain and trying to hide it.  She recalls how disappointed she felt when she was tested in high school and failed to even register even a single iota of super powers. 

 

It is that doubt and uncertainty combine with a mother’s concern for her children that are driving her to distraction. “Dave, do you think that Brian is going to be okay?”

 

Dave hugs her tighter to him and gently kisses her forehead, “Of course hon, he’ll be fine.  He’s probably sitting in his room playing that game of his.  What could happen?”

 

“I’m sorry.  I’m just so worried about him. I just feel like something is wrong, but I can’t put my finger on it.” 

 

Jennifer snuggles into Dave’s side a little more as he gives her a brief squeeze in response just before their show restarts and she forgets her concerns as the show’s star makes an important discovery. 


Jennifer feels surprised to discover that forty minutes has gone by without her having a single worry about her son.  The star of the show is just about to make the usual surprising arrest of the bad guy when she feels a stabbing pain from what could only be her son. 

 

“Oh my god!  Brian’s in trouble!” She screams as she bolts up from her husband’s side and frantically runs up the stairs and into her son’s room.

As she enters his room she sees her son’s body slumped over his desk and surrounded by a dense fog of some kind.  She watches in panic and is unsure what to do when the fog starts to form tendrils that defy gravity by slowly creeping up to enclose his monitor and PC. Dave joins her at her side by the door as the plastic casing of the LCD monitor quickly begins to dissolve while the metal of his PC case begins to rapidly tarnish.  She can only stare with horror as Brian’s LCD monitor is completely eaten as the fog begins to take on a darker gray hue. Within seconds of the LCD monitor disappearing into the fog, the PC’s outer metal case is completely gone, while the inner workings are covered with and even denser fog-like haze.   Tendrils of the murky fog randomly extend a few inches from the main mass surrounding the motherboard, sparks shooting inside before it retreats back into the mass.  A larger and more coherent tendril links Brian’s head to the PC’s remains.  Sparks dance rapidly back and forth across that tendril.

 

The sight of the sparks frees her from her paralyses as she feels with absolute certainty the pain that her son is feeling.  She rushes to his side, ignores the sparks and reaches into the fog to grab her son and pull him away.  She is knocked back by a huge jolt of electricity as she touches his shoulder.

 

Dave rushes to her side and helps her to sit back up.  As she looks to her son, she notices a glow beginning to form inside the now black fog that surrounds Brian’s PC.  She tries to get back up to reach her son’s side again, but her husband holds her back.

 

“Jen.  No.  Whatever it is, it could kill you both if you try to touch him again.”

 

Jen feels frantic as the brightness rapidly increases as electrical energy intertwined with an unknown form of energy cracks and hisses while jumping higher and higher into the air above Brian’s PC.  The pain that her son is feeling right now is driving her insane with worry. The energy coalesces around Brian and a ghostly woman dressed like a queen takes shape standing beside her son. 


Jennifer hears Lindsay yell from the doorway. “Mom!  Dad! What’s happening?!?”

 

“Stay there Lindsay! Don’t come in here!” She yells back.

 

The woman begins to speak with a ghostly whisper. “Be still child.  I refuse to give my newest champion permission to die.”  Her voice sounds like it coming from a great distance, but it is filled with power.  Then, the ghost reaches for Brian’s head and an intense light flashes inside the room.  She feels her son’s relief from the pain and that is the only thing that she finds reassuring about this situation.

 

Blinking the spots from her eyes, the ghostly woman is gone and Jennifer can barely see Brian laying on the floor beneath the thick black haze hovering around him where his desk used to be.  Random sparks arc from within the black cloud and back and forth between it and Brian’s body. Before anyone in the room can react any further, the cloud turns completely opaque as it collapses down to completely cover Brian within a flat black coating.  He’s alive. She knows that with one hundred percent certainty.  Just like she knows that her husband and even Lindsay is deeply worried about Brian.  She can feel both of their emotions running with absolute clarity.

 

Jennifer’s hand still tingles from her previous shock. With that in mind, she crawls cautiously to her son’s side.  She hesitantly reaches out to touch the black substance that now coats her son’s body.  Testing the surface as if it might be a hot pan on the stove, Jennifer is surprised to find that it is slightly cool and hard to her touch, like a shell of some kind.

 

“Dave?  Hand me the phone. I have a lab to call and people to yell at.”

 

**

 

Yawning with boredom, Sergeant Jim Billings sits in the main security room that monitors all of the feeds from the security cameras emplaced in and around the Los Alamos Nanotechnology Research Lab of the University of New Mexico or more as it is more commonly referred to by its military acronym: LANRLUNM. He reaches for his coffee mug and is disappointed to discover that it is empty.

 

Oh, this is going to be another one of those long and boring nights.”

 

Catching a glimpse of movement from one of the cameras, he spots one of the Privates walking the perimeter outside in the cold New Mexico winter weather and shrugs his shoulders. “Oh well, at least this beats walking around outside or shivering in some cave in Afghanistan.”

 

While often boring, detached duty at a DARPA facility is a real plus for your military career. Sometimes it’s not what you know, but who you know. Plus, you get to play with all the newest toys that the brainiacs can dream up. The one year tour of duty is considered a “hardship” tour due to the remote location and non-standard job duties, but the troops hardly consider this place a “hardship”. It’s more like a vacation than anything else and the extra $110 per month of “hazardous duty assignment” is just icing on the cake.

 

Just as he is about to get up to refill his coffee from the pot down the hall in the break room, he is startled by the ringing of the outside phone line. Noting that the time is just past 2300 hrs, he wonders if he shouldn’t have traded duty nights with Sergeant Moseley.

 

He quickly picks up the phone. “Sergeant Billings. L.A.N.R.L.U.N.M. How may I direct your call sir or ma’am?”

 

The sound of a distraught and angry mother on the other end of the line answers his question about switching duties with Sgt. Moselely.

 

Yes Ma’am! Your son visited the labs today for a field trip, okay, I will need to check the visitor logs for his name. No Ma’am. Yes Ma’am. Sorry Ma’am. Certainly Ma’am, I will connect you to my OIC immediately! Sorry ma’am, Officer In Charge. Yes, ma’am. Please hold while I call him.” A now very flustered Sergeant Billings finishes as he puts the woman on hold and dials the extension for Lieutenant Lyon. Suppressing an ambush by AK-47 toting, 7.62 spraying Afgan mujahideen is nothing compared to facing the fury of a distraught mother. Thankfully, the LT answers the line after just two rings.

 

Lieutenant Lyon, L.A.N.R.L.U.N.M. How may I direct your call sir or ma’am?”

 

Sir? Sergeant Billings here. I have a very upset woman on line three who is demanding to speak with whoever is in charge here. She claims that her son was injured from something in the labs during that high school field trip that came through here earlier today.”

 

Why does the night shift get all the nut jobs?” Lt. Lyons asks.

 

Sgt Billings smiles as he reaches for his empty coffee cup. “I dunno sir, but something tells me that this is going to be a long night. I’ll grab the vistor’s log and run it over to you.”

 

Good idea Sergeant. Lyons out.” Lt. Lyons says as he hangs up the phone.

 

Sgt Billings leans back in his chair with a sigh. Ah man, there goes the easy night shift. Reaching a decision, he jumps to his feet to walk down to the front desk to retrieve the log book. I better get that cup of coffee now while I have the chance. Just in case there are more calls, he grabs the cordless phone and exits the security room.

 

The phone vibrates in his hand just after he retrieves the log book. He pauses to answer the phone while trying to not spill his refilled coffee mug. “Sergeant Billings speaking. Yes sir, I have the log book from this afternoon. Yes sir, I’ll be right there.”

 

Sighing, he stops to take a quick drink from his coffee in an effort to try and keep it from spilling. “Ow...Hot, hot, hot!” He mutters before he double times his way to the Lieutenant’s office

 

He manages to arrive at the Lieutenant’s office without spilling a drop, but his tongue is feeling a little sensitive. Lieutenant Lyon is still on the phone with the woman and has a notepad full of notes that include two phone numbers labeled home and cell, the names of the family members and their address.

 

Sorry about the wait Mrs. Peters. Sergeant Billings just walked into my office. We will check the log book to find who signed his class into the complex so that I can start making calls to find your family some help.”

 

Sgt Billings steps to the side of Lt Lyon’s desk and opens the book. He searches for the start of today’s entries for the lieutenant. “Sir, here it is, looks like it was Doctor Edmundson.”

 

Thank you Sergeant.” Lieutenant Lyons says as he cradles the phone between is neck and shoulder as he types Doctor Edmundson’s name into his desktop PC’s employee directory.

 

Dr. Edmundson’s emergency contact information pops up on his monitor. “Ma’am. Sorry, but I need to place you on hold again while I attempt to contact Doctor Edmundson. Yes ma’am. Thank you ma’am. I’ll let you know as soon as I am able to contact him.” He places the line on hold before pushing the button to open another outside line so that he can place a call to Doctor Edmundson.

 

Standing attentively at the other end of the desk, Sergeant Billings winces as he takes another sip of his coffee while the lieutenant waits to see if the doctor is going to answer his phone.

 

It appears that good Doctor is in when the Lieutenant begins to speak again. “Sir, Lieutenant Mark Lyons OIC at the labs. Sorry to call you at this late of an hour, but we might have a containment issue here at the labs...Yes sir, we have a Mrs. Peters on hold here. She called less than five minutes ago regarding her son’s field trip. Yes, sir. The situation that she described to me sounds like it could have been something from here. No sir, it wasn’t her, but she says that her son’s computer and desk disintegrated by some sort of cloud thing and now he is covered in some black shell thing. Yes sir, a Brian Peters signed in with that high school field trip that visited the labs earlier today. Yes sir, What should I tell her? Yes sir, I will let her know. Thank you sir.” He presses the button to disconnect the call with Doctor Edmundson. Pausing for a second to gather his thoughts, he sighs as he presses the button that will bring Mrs. Peters back on the line.

 

Sorry for the wait ma’am. I was able to reach Doctor Edmundson. He is on his way to the labs right now to check on some things. Either he or I will call you as soon as we have more information. Sorry ma’am. Yes ma’am, he lives nearby. I expect that he will be here soon. Yes ma’am. I will let you know. Which number is the best to reach you at? Home? Yes ma’am. I will do that ma’am. Thank you ma’am.” Lieutenant Lyons says before he hangs up the phone.

 

He pauses briefly to think. “Sergeant. Instruct the guards to alert me the instant that Doctor Edmundson enters the compound.”

“Yes sir!”

 

Also, have the Captain's Humvee fueled and readied with the standard decon load. I think that I have a few more folks to wake up now.”

 

Yes sir!” Sgt Billings says as he takes back all the thoughts about a boring night that jinxed him.

 

**

 

>Unknown BIOS Detected

>Unknown CPU Detected…Analyzing
>-Multi-Core Detected
>-Simultaneous Multi-threading Capable

>Performing Memory Test…
>Physical Memory Total: 2,684,354,560 kb
>Physical Memory Available: 2,040,109,465 kb

>New Boot Image Detected
>Initializing Boot Image…Do Not Turn Off Computer

 

Wha?  Did I die?  If I did, this sure is a weird way to be introduced to heaven.

 

Why can’t I move?  Even worse, why can’t I even feel my body?  No pain is good, but no nothing is bad. I try to open my eyes, but I can’t seem to find them.  I have to be able to see!  Something! Anything!

 

[blink]

 

Whoa!  That’s better.  I can see now, but I am not sure what I am seeing.  I find myself hovering over what looks like a large operating room. The room is more like a really deep well and I am at the top looking down from a great height.  I can’t seem to look up, but looking straight down, the walls and floor are impossibly white.  A bed of some kind is in center of the room and I can see a human body lying on top.  I’m too high to make out any details, but as I think that, I start to descend toward the body.  As I get closer, I see that the body is a girl with short black hair and she is completely naked! 

 

I’m puzzled why there is a naked girl lying on an operating room in my dream.  This better not be one of those dreams where I wake up and have to sneak to the bathroom to clean up.  Having one of those dreams in this kind of room would just be too disturbing.

 

Her features get more distinct the closer that I get.  She’s beautiful.  She reminds me of someone.  Her eyes are closed, but she looks like a younger version of Whisper. She looks like she is in her mid to late teens. The Whisper in the game looked to be in her early twenties. You can’t have virtual characters that appear to be too young.  Pedophiles are such a pain.

 

I sink even closer to her. Yep, she is definitely Whisper, but what is she doing in my dream?  As I continue to study her from my vantage point, I notice that she is slightly transparent and there are thousands and thousands of tiny sparks emanating from inside her body.

 

The sparks inside of her body captivate me. I move myself closer to her to try and get a better look.  I try not to focus on her breasts, but it’s hard not to look.  I’ve never had the opportunity to actually study a girl’s breasts in 3D before.  Sure, I’ve seen pictures and I’ve accidentally caught my sister a time a two, but that just isn’t the same.  Embarrassed, I force my gaze down from her chest to her trim stomach. Her stomach flares into pleasantly rounded hips that act to draw my eyes to the forbidden zone between her legs.  I feel myself blushing, so I try to send apologetic thoughts her way.  Her body is just so wonderfully fit and feminine.   I also notice that she is no longer transparent.

 

Forcing my eyes back to her face, I find myself moving closer still.  Her raven black hair and shaped eyebrows accent her flawless white skin.  Laying down, her hair is swept back to expose her elvish ears.  A pert nose and very kissable lips are perfectly matched against her heart-shaped face. She looks so real now.  Sure, she looked good on my computer screen, but without all the rendering and shading, she is absolutely stunning.

 

I try to pull back to get a better overall look again, but I can’t seem to find the reverse switch.  I focus my attention on her face. Somehow, I find myself even closer to her.  I wonder if this is like some fairytale where the hero kisses the sleeping princess to wake her from a cursed slumber.  Her lips sure do look inviting. Do I even have lips to kiss her with?

 

Oh well.

 

I close in and try to give her a hesitant kiss on her lips.  I am pleased to discover that I do indeed have lips. As her lips brush against mine, I feel a spark arc between us.  Her eyes snap open and I can’t help but be captivated by them; large, almond shaped with a deep luminous green color containing silvery traces throughout.  Curious to see if she can see me, I stare into her eyes to see if her pupils are focusing on anything.  I can see the reflection of my face mirrored in her eyes. Then, I start to see what looks like lightening flashing from inside of her pupils. 

 

Now, that’s weird!

 

The green and silver of her cornea added to the lightening flashing from inside of her acts to draw me even closer. Helpless to resist their magnetic draw, I feel myself being pulled into their flashing depths.

 

And..the lights go out again.

 

Damn it!

 

**

 

Jennifer drinks her second cup of coffee while she and Dave stand watch in Brian’s room, anxiously looking for any sign that a parent’s worst nightmare might end. Their child is hurt and they as parents are helpless to help them. She had Dave check every phone in the house to make sure the ringers were at full volume, twice.

 

Except for the time talking to the officer from the labs, she has been burning up the battery in Lindsay’s phone talking to Barb. Thank god for Barb. I don’t know what I would’ve done without her advice.

 

She had to hang up when Lindsay’s battery started to die. Dave tried to sneak into Lindsay’s room to find her charger, only to find her still awake and crying in her bed. After returning to Brian’s room to plug in the cell phone before it quit, he returned to Lindsay’s room to try and comfort their daughter. It took thirty minutes before he was able to return to her side for the vigil over their son.

 

She’s finally asleep, but I don’t think that she will be going to school tomorrow hon.”

 

Sighing as she hugs her husband for comfort. “No, you’re probably right. Even if she did go to school, I doubt that she would get much done. Even though they don’t always get along, they both really do love each other.”

 

Any word from the lab yet?” Dave asks, hopefully.

 

No, but Barb finally had enough. She and Barry will be here tomorrow afternoon. I think that she did that so she could get some sleep.” Jennifer says with a ghost of a smile on her face. “I think she’s almost as worried about Brian as we are.”

 

They are both startled when their quiet companionship is interrupted by all of the house phones ringing loud enough to wake the dead. Jennifer grabs for the cordless phone laying next to her on Brian’s bed and without even checking the caller ID display, she answers it.

 

H..hello?”

 

Hi, this is Doctor Edmundson from the Los Alamos...oh nevermind, I don’t think you really care about that silly stuff right now. I am very sorry that it took me so long to call you, but I needed to check a few things here at the labs and organize the team before I called you back. I’m sure that you are worried, no, frantic about your son and I did not want to be unprepared to assist your family.”

 

Jennifer sobs with relief. “Oh Doctor, you don’t know how glad I am to hear you say that. Brian’s just laying on the floor covered in some black shell thing and we don’t know what to do.”

 

Okay, ma’am...Mrs. Peters, is it okay if i call you Jennifer?” Doctor Edmundson asks with a surprising amount of patience and compassion in his voice.

 

Y...yes.”

 

Okay Jennifer, now I need you to go over to your son and check a few things for me. You might need to move him a little. Do you think that you can do that?”

 

Yes and I have Dave, my husband, here with me just in case.” Jennifer says as she walks over to stand next to her son’s form.

 

Excellent, now can you see his chest?”

 

Yes”

 

Okay, now place your hand on the center of his chest and using your fingertips, see if you can feel a seam in the shape of a small rectangle.”

 

Using her fingers like the doctor asked, Jennifer starts to look for the seam or crack that the doctor is describing. She is worried that she might be doing something wrong until she finds something different. It’s a small seam. Relieved, she traces the seam and is rewarded to discover that there is indeed a rectangular shaped seam on whatever has her son encased. “Okay, I found it Doctor Edmundson. Is this the button that will get him out of this thing?”

 

No, but it is a start Jennifer. What you have just discovered is the diagnostics port for our Individual Land Warrior Medical Emergancy Trauma Survival Suit, but that is a mouthful to say every time so I we just like to call it a METS suit.”

 

Okay, and this Individual Land...umm...METS thing is helping Brian?”

 

I think so, but we need for you to try and open the port.”

 

Okay...what do I need to do?”

 

Now, find the top seam. The one that is closest to your son’s chin.”

 

Okay..found it.”

 

Excellent. Gently and firmly press down.”

 

Jennifer feels excitement and a glimmer of hope spring to life inside her heart. “It opened and there is a little green light in here!”

 

Is there also something that looks like a USB port?”

 

She spots something that looks like it could be one of those things that might be on a computer. “Yes, I think so.”

 

Great! Now we know what equipment that we need to bring with us. Good job Jennifer!”

 

So can we get him out of this now?”

 

Sorry Jennifer, not yet. What the green light is telling us is that the suit is active and that your son is in a state of hibernation. All of his bodily functions have been reduced to assist in the survival of a traumatic injury. Some of the special equipment that we will bring will be able to plug into that diagnostic port and give us a better picture of what is happening to your son.”

 

How long will it take for you to arrive?”

 

We have an advance team lead by Lieutenant Lyon en-route as we are speaking. They should arrive within twenty minutes. Doctor’s Brentwood and Roskaft will be arriving with them and they will assist in the initial site assessment. Myself and Doctor Johannson will be leaving here as soon as I hang up with you and grab a few extra pieces of equipment. So, we should be arriving in about forty five minutes.”

 

Thank you Doctor Edmundson!”

 

Rest assured Jennifer. I will do everything in my power to help your son.”

 

Thank you, I appreciate that.”

 

No problem Jennifer. Well, my ride is here. I need to go.” Doctor Edmundson says just before the line goes dead.

 

Jennifer turns off the phone and turns to her husband to find Lindsay awake and hugging her father. Both of them look at her with questioning eyes.

 

Okay, that was Doctor Edmundson. He said that Brian is in some kind of Army trauma suit thing and that he is on his way with some equipment to help Brian. Also, it sounds like we will have some folks from the Army here in twenty minutes or so and worst of all, the house is a mess!”

 

**

 

Brenda knows that something is wrong the second that she catches sight of the lab’s guard post.  The sound of her favorite CD blaring from her car’s speakers suddenly feels like more of a distraction.  Frowning, she reaches over and turns off her car’s stereo system. Instead of the normal two soldiers on gate duty, there are now four soldiers and a Humvee at the gate.

 

She recognizes the soldier that stops her and smiles at him. Pulling forward and rolling down her window, she is surprised by the serious expressions on his face. 


“Morning ma’am.  Identification please” Private Jacobson asks, all business as she digs through her purse to find her ID badge.  Her badge gets more than just a simple look.  Normally, all she has to do is flash her badge to the soldier manning the gate.  Something is definitely happening this morning.

 

“What’s going on Jacobson?”

 

Her concern deepens with his reply, “Sorry ma’am, but I can’t really say.”  Not “Sorry Brenda” or even “Sorry Ms. Koshnick”. 


Brenda feels a little panic start to set in to the pit of her stomach.I hope there wasn’t an accident in the labs

 

“Thank you ma’am.  You’re cleared to enter” Private Jacobson says as he hands back her ID badge and waves her through.

 

The mystery gets even more alarming when she isn’t able to get her normal parking spot closer to the front.  She’s normally one of the first people to arrive, but this morning even Doctor Edmundson’s car is here already.

 

Entering the building, she is met by another battle ready soldier in full combat gear. “Ms. Koshnick?”

 

Now, she is really starting to get worried. “Yes?”

 

“Major Thole ordered me to escort you to the C-Wing conference room as soon as you arrive.”

 

“Okay?” Brenda says, confused and obviously showing it as she follows the soldier through the halls and to the door of the conference room.  He opens the door for her and gestures for her to enter.  She is surprised to see the room full of research scientists, Major Thole, Captain McKinney, and a very tired and distraught looking civilian woman who looks up at Brenda with desperate hope in her puffy and tear stained eyes. 

 

“Ah, Brenda!” Doctor Edumndson says, looking slightly more wrinkled than is normal for him. He motions for her to join him at the head of the room. “Sorry about all the excitement, but we have a bit of mystery and we are hoping that you might have some additional insights.  I believe that you know or have seen most of the people in the room, but allow me to introduce Mrs. Jennifer Peters.”

 

“Mrs. Peters, this young lady is Brenda Koshnick. She works in our HR department and she is an absolute wizard at helping me get my presentations to work.  She is the one whom I noticed speaking to your son and his young friend during yesterday’s lunch break.”

 

Brenda’s heart skips a beat when she realizes who he is talking about. “Brian? Oh my god! Did something happen to him?”  She quickly glances between Dr. Edmundson and Mrs. Peters.  Dr. Edmundson looks concerned about something, but it’s the desperate and almost pleading expression on Mrs. Peters’ face that really causes Brenda’s heart to beat hard.

 

“We can’t go into the details right now, but I can tell you that he is here and that he is very sick. It could be of great help to everyone if there is anything that he might have said to you or that you might have noticed about him that could help us figure out what has happened to him.”

 

“Umm, okay.  Well, during lunch I overheard Brian and his friend talking about GEO.” Brenda says.

 

Dr. Edmundson looks confused. “GEO?”

 

“Oh sorry, GEO. It stands for Good and Evil Online and it is an online game that I play.”

 

“Okay, sorry about the interruption Brenda, but I wasn’t sure if everyone else here understood what that term meant.”

 

Brenda smiles at his obvious dissemination.  “So, I heard them talking about GEO and I asked if I could join them for lunch. I was surprised to find out that Brian plays on the same server and even the same guild that I belong to.  I was even more surprised to find out that he plays Whisper.”

 

“Sorry to interrupt you again Brenda. I think we can figure out what this server and guild thing is, but what is a Whisper?”

 

“Sorry Doctor, Whisper is the character that Brian plays in GEO.  She is a high-level rogue and right now she has everyone on the Good side scrambling to find her.”

 

“She? Oh...sorry, I guess that it is a video game thing. A rogue?  Is that like a thief or something?”  Brenda watches as the military folks in the room start to pay closer attention.


“Yes, a rogue is like a thief.  They primarily win by being sneaky and Whisper, I mean Brian is one of the best, if not the best on our side.”

 

“Okay, other than being a rogue. Why is everyone trying to find Brian’s character?”


“Well...”  Brenda hesitates. “Whisper received a quest to assassinate another player’s character.”  She reluctantly admits. Brenda notices the military folks jump with the word ‘assassinate’.

 

“Are you trying to tell us that this kid is not just a thief, but that he’s also a trained assassin?” Major Thole asks, sounding incredulous.

 

“Umm, no sir. Not exactly.  The character that he plays isn’t really an assassin, but as part of his character’s class, his character does have the skills to be an assassin.  Kalisa, the character that I play is a highly skilled swords-woman.  Do I look like I could swing a sword with any degree of skill?” Brenda watches as the room relaxes with a slight chuckle at the thought of her swinging a sword around.  A few of the men do get an interested look on their faces though.

 

“Like I was saying though, his character got this quest or mission, but he didn’t tell anyone that he had it. So, when he stole our guild-leader’s griffon after mentioning having some item to steal, the leaders on the good side went crazy because they thought that he was going to steal our Font.”

 

“He told you about this though?”  Major Thole asks with disbelieve.

 

“Yes, his friend kind of pressured him into telling me after I told him what Lord Vincint thought he was trying to do.”

 

“Okay, then what happened?”

 

“Well, he was looking pretty miserable about the whole thing, so just before he got called to continue the tour, I gave him my phone number in case he needed to talk to someone about it.”

 

“Did he call you?” Mrs. Peters asks, looking up at Brenda with renewed hope in her eyes.

 

Brenda looked directly at her and nodded her head. “Yes, he called me last night while he was waiting in Lady Seramis’s room for her to return from a party that she was hosting at her stronghold.”

 

“Who is this ‘Lady Seramis’?  Was she his target?” Major Thole asks.

 

“Yes sir, she was his ‘target’.” Brenda struggled to contain her annoyance for the Major.  She understood why Major Thole is reacting the way he is, but she still found it slightly annoying.  GEO is just a game.  Why can’t he seem to understand that?

 

“Okay, so did he neutralize his target?” Major Thole asks.

 

Brenda slowly considers her reply as she watches Mrs. Peters anxiously search her face.  Brenda can almost feel what Mrs. Peters must be going through right now.  How could her son coldly assassinate someone.  Even if that someone isn’t real.

 

“I don’t think so...”

 

“Why not?  It sounds like he was in place and ready to carry out his mission.  What could have stopped him?” Major Thole asks, skeptically.

 

Brenda returned her gaze to the Major and hardened her expression.  Why was he being such an ass about it? Couldn’t he see how much pain Mrs. Peters was feeling?  “Because, we talked about how this wasn’t the right thing to do, that it might really be a ‘test’ of his character and finally, just before he hung up on me, he said that a high level enemy player assassin had just entered the room.”

 

“So, do you think that he might have decided to stop this other assassin from killing the target?” Major Thole asks, sounding a little mollified.

 

“I don’t know sir. I’m not sure that he could have stopped the other assassin.  From what I know about the other assassin, I am pretty sure that Whisper was much lower level then the other assassin. Whisper wouldn’t have stood a chance at stopping him.”

 

“This is all fairly complex for a video game, Ms. Koshnick” Major Thole says while most of the people around the table nod their heads in agreement.

 

Doctor Edmunson chooses that observation to step in and take charge of the conversation again. “So, now we know what he was doing just before he was...” He stops what he was going to say as he looks at Brenda then to Major Thole.  Major Thole nods his head in silent agreement before Doctor Edmundson continues with what he started to say. “...before the METS suit that he somehow carried out of here with him was activated.”

 

Feeling confused, Brenda looks to Doctor Edmundson for an explaination. “A what?”

 

“It’s a prototype nano survival suit that was designed to automatically seal around a wounded soldier and stabilize them until medical help can arrive.”

 

“Would that have anything to do with Brian saying that he thought that the game was acting weird on him?”

 

Dr. Edmundson focuses his full attention on Brenda. “Weird? How?”

 

“Well, he told me that it felt like the game was getting too real for him. He thought that he was able to smell the virtual food being cooked and he mentioned something about a ‘Primary Mission Success’ and ‘ROV Capture’ number showing up on his screen when he wondered what his chances of killing Lady Seramis were.”  She says, feeling concerned as she watches the faces of Major Thole, Doctor Edmundson and a few of the other people sitting around the table turn a little pale. 

 

Doctor Edmundson clears his throat. “Umm, Brenda do you think that it would be possible for you to login to this GEO game of yours and find out what happened with this Lady Seramis person?  Maybe even talk to her?”

 

“I can try, but I will need my computer and I doubt that anyone will be online at this time of the day.  Most of the people on our server are on East Coast time.”  Brenda says as her body starts to buzz with pride and excitement.  Out of all the scientists and soldiers in the room, Brenda, a simple HR clerk, might be able to play a critical role with helping Brian and his family.  On the plus side, it’s not every day that your boss asks you to play a video game and still pay you for it.

 

The glimmer of hope in Mrs. Peters’ eyes brings all of those feelings crashing to a halt.  Brenda walks over and gives the distraught woman a hug. “I’ll do everything that I can to help you and Brian.”

 

“Thank you” Mrs. Peters says as she begins to softly cry on the taller woman’s shoulder while Doctor Edmundson stands awkwardly by their side and the rest of the men sneak out of the room.

 

“Sir, is there someplace that Mrs. Peters can rest?  She’s dead on her feet here.”  Brenda asks.

 

Dr. Edmundson nods and gently reaches down to touch Mrs. Peters on her shoulder.  As she stands, Brenda watches as he guides Mrs. Peters out of the room. “Please, come with me Jennifer. Let me help you find someplace that you can rest a little.  It will be a few hours before we can learn anything else.”

 

Brenda struggles to hold back her tears as clearly distraught Mrs. Peters turns to her with tears in her eyes. “Thank you Doctor Edumdson and Ms. Koshnick.  I don’t know what I would do without your help.”

 

"Please Mrs. Peters, it's Brenda.  You can just call me Brenda."  She says, following them both out of the room to assist Dr. Edmundson with getting Mrs. Peters settled somewhere.

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Comments

Yay!

I wondered if something had happened to you. Revisions are a pain! However this looks pretty good to me!
Grover

Stalker...

Do you have an alert that sends you a text to your pager/phone? :)

-- Sleethr

-- Sleethr

:)

Yay another great chapter ty :)

pffffffft Grover beat me this time :P

I play online games *rolls eyes* yes I am one of those people :P
Fav puplished authors atm are Patricia Briggs (Mercy Thompson series),Carrie Vaughn (Kitty series), Kim Harrision.

We like the same authors.

NoraAdrienne's picture

Jasmyn,
Check out my blog site and see if any of the authors I've reviewed interest you. LOL

www.noraadrienne.wordpress.com and please click one of the Follow This Blog buttons. I'm trying to build up my follower lists so that Penguin books will add me to their "remote reviewer" lists.

loading boot image....

revolution's picture

Do not turn off computer. very nice usage of the standard! great chapter can't wait untill the next.

Hooray! More Whisper!

Okay, I have to admit, I'm not sure if I like the changes, but if you never read the original, it may be true that this eliminates some details that can be left out without changing the story much. Okay, I'm good. I still love the story, and can't wait for more!

Wren

Worth the wait

Good to see the story progressing. Publish when you're good and ready, and don't mind us. Yes I like serials to continue at a steady rate. Yes I get agitated and worried when days pass an there's no new stuff. More than anything though, I appreciate it when a story/episode appears that has received the due care and attention of its author.

This is a great tale, waking all sorts of nostalgia and strange longing. Please keep it coming (at your pace)

Maeryn Lamonte, the girl inside

Maeryn Lamonte, the girl inside

well....

you have definitely wet the appetite for the next chapter.
thanks

Good chapter, looking

Good chapter, looking forward to reading what will happen next, thanks for sharing

Lizzie :)

Yule

Bailey's Angel
The Godmother :p

Too bad

Too bad you cut out parts. More is better with this story! ;)

---------
The world was so full of sharp bends that if they didn't put a few twists in you, you wouldn't stand a chance of fitting in. -- Terry Pratchett

To quote Anton Pavlovich,

"Brevity is the sister of talent." Now if only we were sure it was a wise older sister or an awesome baby sister and not some kind of snotty bratty one or infuriating arrogant one! :)

This is why I am of mixed feelings about leaving parts out.

I noticed that the eyes of Whisper in-dream and the eyes of Brian had the same color theme. I do wonder if he'll be able to go back and forth, even theoretically - seeing as what the most likely result of this entire event will be. ;)

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

An alternate opinion

Ummmm ... Okay, remember, constructive criticism.

The story line in this chapter seems muddled and jerks around without any establishing narative for those jumps.

"The woman begins to speak..." Wait, what woman. Ghostly image gone. What, explain please.

Mrs. peters asks for the phone then we cut to Brenda at the labs at night with a security alert in progress. How did they know? The parents don't know anything about the nanites so they didn't tell the lab anything (was there some sort of activation message sent?).

Then, all of a sudden, Mrs. Peters is in the conference at the lab. What? Huh? How did she get here. I could go on but it's a lot of the same.

You obviously cut a lot out that probably set up all of these scenes and the cuts between them. You need to either put it back or write something else for the transitions.

This chapter is simply not anywhere near the high quality of story telling that we've read in the previous chapters. Where the other chapters I would rate 8 out of 10, this one is at best a 4 (closer to a 3 really).

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I'm disappointed and trying to give you both the reason why and some advice on fixing things.

Keep plugging away at it, Choy.

I disagree [rant]

"The woman begins to speak" - just a couple paragraphs before she coalesced in the fog, a ghostly image of a woman. The words she said - are the same ones Aunghadhail aka Seramis spoke at the end of the previous chapter. Jerky narrative not!

The change from Mrs Peters to Brenda does leave a few hours of events worth out. But it is rather clear it is not the night but early morning - after all Brenda noticed that unusually for the time her place for parking was already occupied, and she was usually one of the first to arrive. What's so difficult to guess? That the lab that was called sent people to collect Brian, that scientists working on nanites have seen the shell and recognised it for something they were creating? I think both are rather transparent.

Then all of a sudden everyone is in the conference in the lab? Duh, Mrs. Peters wouldn't have left her child alone, nor would she have allowed his situation to be discussed without her, and Brenda was led there by a soldier.

Okay, [/rant]. Sorry for this, a little, I am.

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Faraway


On rights of free advertisement:
Big Closet Top Shelf

Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

Well, if I was Mrs. Peters.

So, my son goes off to a field trip at some government wierd-science research institution, and a few hours later he's engulfed by an electric fog and then covered in a black thing I can't get off him. Yes, the first thing I'm going to do is call up said institution and ask none to politely what they hell they did to him.

Sure, there are bits missing, but that's fairly normal when a story is following a person and said person is unconscious.

I'm with Faraway on this one.

Stories follow a creative flow

... the reader is also expected to fill in some details that are implied in their imagination. Such styling is perfectly appropriate for highly dynamic and confusing scenarios and confers that sense better than dotting all the i's and crossing all the t's. It would come off as too stiff.

I have absolutely no problem with this at all.

Kim

I'm wondering...

If I hadn't said anything, would people have noticed? ;)

I've looked back over the cut material and maybe I should've kept it. Well, probably the phone call to the labs and their response anyway.

In a blatant effort to try and reach a record comments count, I'll try and get this chapter updated tonight with parts of the cut material for you all.

-- Sleethr

-- Sleethr

Don't bother

Don't bother. Concentrate on the next chapter. I want to know what technomage powers + nanites + magic + virtual elf girl combine into,

----------
The world was so full of sharp bends that if they didn't put a few twists in you, you wouldn't stand a chance of fitting in. -- Terry Pratchett

I think

you're being too nitpicky.
It's obvious from the last chapter that the woman who is described as 'queenly' is Aunghadhail who is Fey's other half. Fey is the player for Lady Seramis.

How they got to the base - he said that there was a team on the way to fetch them. I don't think Sleethr needed to describe the journey to the lab.

Whisper - Chapter 13

Wondered when the Academy would get involved.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Loving the story

Really enjoying the story and looking forward to reading more as you update the story. I will say that I could not wait after reading the last chapter and read all that you had posted on the Crystal Hall and now am really dying to have the story catch-up and find out what happens next. I liked both chapters, but will admit that I like to get the details that where left out. Keep up the great writing.

Cool!

This is really great, I love where it's going and can't wait for more.

Cripes!

So not only is Brian being rebuilt in the image of his GEO character by nanites he somehow managed to (a) extract from the sealed jar and (b) reactivate, but it looks as though they've analysed his computer hardware / firmware / software, and are requisitioning the hardware to break down into components and reuse in the reconstruction of his body. Ooh err.

It'll be interesting seeing what happens in the lab later that day / evening when Brenda logs in with the lab guys (and Brian's parents) watching...


As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

Whisper - Chapter 13

What will Brian become?

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

I really don't like the

I really don't like the interest being shown by the Major in this game and Brian's abilities in it. Does make me think that the Major just might be considering if there is something there that can possibly be used or incorporated into real life military activities. That is when games can be turn really, really bad and go from the "dark side of the Force".