Thank you for all of the supportive comments and Private messages. I went back to my original header on Chapter One and started to rethink things from Chapter 3. I have totally redone this chapter and focused on the underlying resentment that Alyce harbors for her parents not telling her the truth. I have taken this plot in a new direction. I started to think about the motives of the parents . There was a specific reason why they withheld the knowledge from her for so long and it was a very selfish one. Read it and you will find out. I wish to thank Jill Micayla for providing the spark of inspiration for my new direction.
Hugs,
Jen
Comments
Your kindness is appreciated
I've been reading your story and all the comments that have been made. I appreciate the Kudo's but I think everyone who wrote had your best interest at heart. When I tutored research writing in college the one thing I always told my students "Write what you are comfortable with, you are the subject matter expert."
This is your universe, you created it, I agree with Angela keep your readers clued in to whats taking place within reason. When I wrote Plausible Reasoning I talked to the state hospital in North Dakota, I went on line to make sure cities were in proper order and I had an editor who researched with me and kept me on track with the University of North Dakota.
Now I am working on me using what Holly and Angela instilled into me. I think its only fair that those who commented also get the Kudo's.
When I wrote Jolene's new BFF, it was removed after a few days for a major rewrite, again it was with the help of others. I joined with Holly as a co-writer on the story.
Don't rush take your time and do it the way you want to do it. consider this as a lifes moment when you can embrace your self and make it better (Hey Jude)
Jill Micayla
May you have a wonderful today and a better tomorrow
Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.
Well, I am perhaps a bit late
I wanted to say that I appreciate your story, in this new form as well as in the old. I have to admit though that the old chapter 3 was a bit unrealistic, I can't imagine that happening in the real world. But that's not a shortcoming. many of us goes here to dream, especially about unrealistic things. It may be magic, exceptionally successful transitions, being intersex instead of just transsexual ... And an accepting society that encourage finding out your identity (like you portrayed I believe) is not that exceptional.
Sometimes comments can be seen as negative even though they might not originally. At least you know the person have read the story till the end, and must have somewhat enjoyed it not to quit before :) Don't loose faith, your story is also for you, and if people don't like it, their loss. (Still I can't believe no one liked it)
Please continue,
Take care
Millie
Ambivalence?
On the one hand, I wasn't planning to continue reading your "old" story. Inability to suspend disbelief was part of it -- as much for the non-sequitur of disguising a complete lifestyle change as a creative writing paper as for the actual plan. But it was a plot I didn't particularly want to read in any case; we seemed clearly to be heading toward unwanted, forced changes and inevitable public humiliation.
The new story seems more promising from that standpoint.
On the other hand, it bothers me when authors here decide they can't write the story they planned only because their subject matter seems unpopular. I suppose it's related to Voltaire's old "I disagree with what you say but would defend to the death your right to say it." This isn't a commercial site and you shouldn't feel that you need to write what a majority here wants to read.
If you're satisfied pursuing the new path you've set the story upon, great. But if that's not the story you want to write, you may be better off stopping now than keeping it going later out of a sense of duty to your readers.
Eric
You Seemed To Make Assumptions
You seem to be making assumptions on where the story was going and that determination is up to me and not you. You have no idea what my intent is with this story. I am so sorry that you lack an imagination. THIS IS FICTION!!!! If you don't want to read it, you don't have to.
You Write Things...
...and readers make assumptions. That's how the game works. If you can transcend those assumptions, more power to you. If not, as you said, we don't have to read the story.
There's a difference between willful suspension of disbelief and lack of imagination. Ignore that fact and both your audience size and your writing quality will suffer. You don't need to care about the first of those unless you want to.
Judging from your response, my note must have come out much more smug than I intended. The main point I was making was the same as your answer: if you wanted to write your original story, the fact that I (and others who commented publicly, and -- judging from your note -- many more who commented privately) didn't want to read that story shouldn't stand in your way.
You inform us that you've decided to change the focus of your story based on public and private comments. Fine. Please realize that (1) you're not obligated to do so, and (2) it's your decision, not ours, to make.
Eric
You know your story best
I am happy to hear you are continuing.
I see you intend to focus on the feelings/motivtions of the main characters. Motivations of the major characters is a key to my understanding of a story. Without knowing at least some of the reason's behind a character's actions, a story can degenerate into lifeless narative.
I hope our comments have helped you clarify your story in your mind. It is still your story, don't change it unless you feel it needs it.
Best wishes.
John in Wauwatosa
John in Wauwatosa