it's the time of the season

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Well that was a bit of a dark patch. Just about all the way through this latest relapse, though it does seem that my left leg isn't going to get back all its function and I will need to carry a cane from now on (I can walk, but if I stay on my feet for more than 15 minutes my leg gets very tired and difficult to move).

I've spent about six weeks away from the office, the longest period for four years, and the place was still standing when I returned (drat I'm not indispensable). With my left hand AWOL I couldn't do most of the thing I enjoy - no typing, couldn't make chord shapes on my guitar, couldn't use a camera & couldn't work in the darkroom - I wrote a little with a pen, but that was about it.

I listened to a lot of music - lots, about twelve hours day - mostly stuff from the late sixties. Some I knew, but a lot I didn't (I think I've personally helped Amazon weather the credit crunch). One huge discovery was the Zombies' 'Odessey and Oracle'... recorded the same year I was born I'd only ever heard one track off it ('It's the time of the season'), but it was an amazing revelation... it added three songs to the select list of songs that make me cry ('Here, There and Everywhere','God Only Knows' and another I'll not mention).

At first I thought I was affected by the sheer beauty of it - the sound's quite spare, but filled out with mellotron and all manner of singing - harmony, counterpoint and even polyphony). However, the more I listened I realised it was largely because many of the songs are about dealing with loneliness or the break up of relationships. I've lived alone for years and haven't had a break up to worry about for years, but when I'm not in work I pretty much spend my entire time inside myself.

The first song 'Care of Cell 44' is a boy writing to his girl in prison... a bit of a reverse from the norm. This is weepy song number one... there's an a capella vocal before a swoosh of mellotron and a key change take you into the chorus. It's so jubilant, it chokes me every time.

It's followed by another weepy track, the very beautiful 'A Rose for Emily'. It's about a woman who has only her pride to protect her from her loneliness - it should be depressing, but the music is so very perfect... and I probably identify with her too much to allow myself to wallow... just shed an occasional tear.

Less emotionally affecting is 'Brief Candles' where each verse is about a separate character reconciling themselves to a break up, either by laughing at themselves, realising they're 'better off that way', or just enjoying the self-pity. On a par is 'Changes' where the singer compares a girl he knew to the four seasons, contrasting that with her now materialistic attitudes.

There's one song I sometimes skip, not because it's bad but because I find it upsetting. 'The Butcher's Tale' is about a young soldier in the Great War, homesick, frightened, possibly shellshocked and forced to look at the decomposing body of a friend hanging on the wire in front of his trench. It's not sung by the band's main vocalist, and the singer's voice is often on the very edge of cracking... I just can't listen to it that often.

Before the final and most famous song on the album is my favourite - 'Friends of Mine' where he sings about how happy he is to have two friend who so obviously love each other, but it also points at a sadness in the singer's life. That may be a bit too deep an analysis of what is a fairly lightweight, jaunty track, but that's how I - and the tears - roll :)

I've just realised that this blog entry reads a little like the interludes in 'American Psycho' where Patrick Bateman shares his views on the significance of the most banal pop acts. Some albums though just become inextricable parts of periods of my life, and I will always associate. 'Odessey and Oracle' has been a good companion through some fairly dark weeks, and with the announcement of a new treatment for MS that can possibly reverse some of the damage already done... I'm seeing a new neurologist in January and I'm hoping to take part in the next round of UK trials (though I've bought a swanky new cane just in case).

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