How Embarrasing

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Author: 

Author’s pre-mumble.
Disclaimer: any claimers or disclaimers that ought to accompany a work of fiction are hereby included by reference.

One of the talking heads here is actually trans. But no one knows, except the other one.

~~~

TH1
(A beautiful strawberry-blond reporter appears on camera, running back to the news desk. As she takes her seat next to the handsome reporter with wavy brown hair and brilliant white teeth, she speaks.)

OK Jim, we have breaking news coming in …

(They smile at each other briefly, then return to their jobs. She composes herself and looks camera-ward.)

In a humiliating defeat, the Russian’s have withdrawn their spy vessel that has been leisurely cruising up and down America’s eastern seaboard.

TH2
What? Are you sure, Ellen?

TH1
(Howls of laughter)

Holy sh … I mean – this is really funny.

Oh, sorry Jim. Yes, we have film coming in momentarily. And there also seems to be a few cell phone videos just now hitting the Internet.
Earlier this morning a helicopter with ten paying passengers – tourists, I suppose you could say – flew out to the Russian ship and started circling. The passengers were taking pictures. With no cell service 20 miles offshore they could not immediately upload to the Net. But several in that first group had called friends before they left and every helicopter charter service in the Carolina’s, where the Russian ship was sailing, began receiving calls for tickets.

Within an hour of the first helicopter heading back to shore, seven more arrived. Passengers with a walkie-talkie function on their phones could talk to others on the other choppers. The choppers took turns doing low and slow passes so everyone could get plenty of pictures.

Apparently there was a lot of encrypted radio traffic between the ship and a Russian plane somewhere nearby. After a third wave of tourists took over from the second, the spy ship stopped for about half an hour then began moving away from the eastern coast.

The final straw, however, happened just after that group of choppers stopped following the ship. They must have been at their maximum safe range because they began hovering instead of following. When the spy ship noticed this it turned around and stopped retreating.
Just as the tourist choppers started heading back for shore however, and the spy ship began to move westward, another chopper showed up.

It was black and had a big TRUMP logo on the side.

TH2
OH! That is funny. That’s really funny. What happened?

TH1
It circled several times. The spy ship stopped again, then turned back to the east and moved out at high speed. It was last seen disappearing over the horizon with that black chopper still following it.

TH2
Well folks. There you have it. Just when you think there is nothing else new that this Weirdo in the White House can do …

TH1
He proves he can.

Oh. And now, a word from …

Comments

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Submitted by on

Veronica,

Thank you for commenting. My first comment to my first story. History in the making. But I broke a rule, so it was "demoted" to a blog. Perhaps I can fix that.

Fiction about the news. Fake news. Out here in the physical world I guess it would be. But in the fake world of fiction, fake becomes real.

After all, there was video ...

; - )

T

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Submitted by on

Dkp,

Thanks for commenting (to a comment, not to me).

You sound very confident. I like confidence. I have confidence as well. Luckily I also have a thick skin, for those times when my confidence turns out to be misplaced.

But in this case it reminds me of the literally hundreds of politicians and reporters and experts of various sort that have been just as positive about this Weirdo, before and after he was in the White House. And they were always wrong. I'm still scratching my head, wondering how he does it.

The answer seems to revolve around his status as a non-politician. But that is still not an answer - just a clue.

Anyway, it is at least possible that you will join those other hundreds in the Ranks of the Wrong. If something like this ever really happens.

Good luck,
T

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Submitted by on

Another Brian,

Thank you for commenting.

It's actually an interesting question. He might, but he has already set the precedent of pledging any profits from his hotel, just down the street, to the US Treasury.

He might do the same thing in a situation like this. (If it were to ever actually happen.)

T

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Submitted by on

Angharad,

Thanks for commenting.

It DOES mess up his hair. Weird.

Regards,
T

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