I'm an expert at telling other people what to do. Results vary, but my satisfaction is consistent.

Don't send me anything that's - like - dumb - or anything, unless it's really, really good. Okay?

You can type it on bond paper, and then leave it in the park under the statue of Edmund Fitzgerald. (The statue is sort of wrecked.) As an alternative*, you can e-mail the material to be edited or read for comment to [email protected]. Tell me what it is that you expect me to do, so I can laugh ("maryly"?) as I do whatever the heck strikes my fancy.

If you're a masochist (who wants her fancy struck) or who's looking for someone to rip your work to shreds - look elsewhere. My style is to dress you down gently. There will be no "cross" dressing on my part, in that way, at least.

I'm not all that much into grammar or spelling, but have some fairly well-developed** ideas about plot and the art of motorcycle maintenance. I know when to say Zen.

You can sample my work here. My portfolio is eclectic and ranges from something even I wouldn't read -- all the way to something slightly better than rancid. If you would like to write a story like one of my offerings, I would be the girl for you. If not, why not? (Hmmmm. If my stories are offerings, would BC be an offertory? An olfactory might be more accurate, given some of my little not-so-gems.)

I'm not at all interested in co-authoring. Did that already. It worked, but I aged almost two years in the process.

I especially like to serve authors who are better than me, who I can drag down to my level.

The only thing I will not edit is a serial that's not completed. (I will critique cereal. How did you think they got the rice to puff? I tell the little rice seeds just how wonderful they are, and then they burst with pride. Which is much better than writing honeymoon reviews and thereby causing brides to burst.) I digress. Too many authors have frustrated me by stopping mid-stream. I'm doing this now for Erin (I'm editing her serial, not stopping mid-stream - she does that all by herself.), but that's only because she's one of those I'm attempting to drag down.

I'm serious (Lassie***) and ready to help.

Angela Rasch (Jill M I)

* Did you ever think about the word "alternative"? I have, but found other things to do that were more interesting.

** Well-developed: I place all my ideas in a bucket, and then lower them into a well until they're developed.

*** Lassie = the dog star.

Have posted in Whateley Fan Fic - at "The Crystal Hall" forums, one of Bob Arnold's sites - and would like to post to here or Stardust or that Sapphire person's site.

Anywho - huh? - my punctuation skills leave much to be desired. Between MS Word 2002, my eyeballs and Miram Webster(C), I manage to catch most of the big stuff. I need someone to clean things up a bit. I'm actually - I hate "actually" - reviewing comma usage and such but it's been years since school and a second set of eyes with brain attached would be welcome.

I just completed my second series of "Timeout" a Whateley Accademy Fan Fic and am starting Series 3. That's 14 chapters per series at an average of ten pages per chapter plus my side story, Glacier Girl, a single chapter story I wrote for the recent - late 2005, early 2006 - Morpheus contest. I've gotten lots of hints from participants at the site and even some of the canon authors but would benefit from some help.

If you're interested, please email me or reply here. In the links section, "other TG" I think, there is a link to The Crystal Hall if you want to see what you'd be getting yourself into.

Thanks for your time, I promise my fiction won't induce too many severe headaches or serious brain damage.

John in Wauwatosa