Well, I'm upset, and it's upset occasionally when I think about it.
Why? Look at my signature. I've been on HRT for 22 months. You would think that I'd have tits, hips, SubCu fat, thinner face hair, and so on, right?
I don't. I still look like a boy in drag, and when my beard pokes through my makeup, I want to die of embarrassment.
I've been on 1.25 mg of Premarin the whole time. When asked to increase the dose, I was told "this is a marathon, not a sprint."
I had hoped that time would make the damned changes I want, and it hasn't.
Except for finishing the RLT (which I will October 12 this year), and actually having the surgeries, I'm a woman. EXCEPT for the blessed hormones.
I've tried to go to another doctor for better, more correct HRT, but I need to get there, a doctor's note from my therapist (who I also haven't seen for a while, mostly because things are going okay), and $150 in hand due to Insurance not paying for the appt when I go.
And I still have to pad my bras out.
Disgusted, tired, pissed and at times wanting to just stop it all are how I feel. The ONLY change I've been able to see is that *occasionally* when I'm doubling up (which means not taking anything the next day), I will be more prone to crying over sentimental stuff. Not always, but sometimes.
Permanent crossdresser at this point. And I don't like it.
So yeah, I'm happy, proud and disgusted.
Does ANYONE know the proper dosage of Premarin that I should be taking at a 6', 230+ lb, 44 year old person? I'd like to know so I can yell at the endo who has been sandbagging me all this time.
Comments
Not everyone reacts the same
Not everyone reacts the same to HRT and some never get the righ dose due to several medical reasons. What are you taking as blockers?Standard practice overhere is to start with blockers (androcure for me) and ad the estrogen (oestrogel for me) later on.
Conserning bodyhair (which facial hair is part of), I found out that it's one of the least affect areas by HRT for me >thinks back to a greek friend, and some others<. Electrolysis or other permanent hair removal methods are the only way to go.
Not a medical proffesional but just my own 2 cents
Lynne
HRT
Are you not taking Spironolactone? That is what kills the production of Testosterone. It is also a Blood pressure medication in the correct dosage. You're taking Premarin? Why? Where do you live? I didn't take the Spiro for very long because I had a castration. I searched for a price and got it for $1000. That way you don't need Spiro. I took 2 mg of Estrodial for a few years and then they put me on Vivelle dot patches, because I had kidney problems.
I think someone is taking you for a ride. Your protocol does not sound like anything I was ever told. 8 1/2 years into it, I have boobs, and had SRS in 2006. The boobs are natural and I likes em a lot.
Not sure if it helps
But...
I had started on 0.625mg over the past year of premarine, and 100mg of spironolactone, from march of last year to march of this year, and then was increased to 1.25mg premarine, with same spironolactone dose; it does take time hunny, i have asked my doctor many times too, as other girls are taking much heavier dosages off the start; hes always saying this way it gets your organs used to it by gradual increases rather then heavy doses off the bat when the body hasnt grown accustomed. I am 23 years old, and 150 pounds...i know i totally gotta loose the weight. I am 5'7 as i shrunk due to my scoliosis. anyways. hunny, it is going to take a long time, this is like puberty sweety, u dont see 14 year olds with double d's u might in 16 year olds because puberty takes sooooo long. and this is a puberty, I still double up even though my girlfriends are always sayigng u dont need to, its more about confidance and stamina. When u think u dont measure up to the other girls, or even when there unintentionally pushing it in your face that they have curves to the extent u havent reached yet, it makes u more subconsious about every aspect of your feminine appearance.
Some even dont increase there busts, and many dont grow there hip fat out enough to give them flirty curves, thats why many of us resort to plastic surgery. This all can take up to 4 years on hrt, before you have crossed the puberty marker, some even longer then that. You have to be pateient hunny, hell i even have to shave my face every day, wear darker concealer, then my skin tone to hide the awful shadow. and if u look around hunny im sure u can find the facial concealer at some tg shops, that is expensive but from what i heard as i dont use it, but have heard that it works rather well.
Just be patient hun, 1.25mg of premarine is fine at your level, there are many reasons why doctors are hesitant on increasesing hormonal dosages, especially for those of near senior ages, as premarine itself can increase your risks of heart attacks and strokes, and even some cancers such as of the breast. Spironolatone can do the same, be careful, be aware and do your research hun, i have hundreds of papers that i read and reread constantly, befor i began my transition and still to this day. all so i am constantly aware of everything, to due with this very risky life that my identiy and dreams had pushed my to choose to live.
Hunny, ur a fine girl, and im guessing u wouldn't believe me even if i told u so but i think your a very beatiful woman, i might not see your reflection but i see your spirit, its torn but its radient keep on smiling ok sweety.
Plenty of hugs to your amazingness;
Erin Amelia Fletcher
With Love and Light, and Smiles so Bright!
Erin Amelia Fletcher
How much is enough?
I have been on premarin 0.625mg for 15 yrs now. Im currently a full 'B' cup. They say genetics makes more difference than dosage.
There are almost as many theories as there are drs to perscibe them. You do not need HIGH dose to get you moving. High doeses of estrogenics can cause serious damage to organs specialy the liver and kidneys. Some drs will prrscribe 6 or even 8 mg of estrogen plus patches, creames, and implants. Unfortunately TSes are such a small group that it is difficult if not impossible to say which dosage isbest.
In GGs the amount of estradiol measured in there system varies and is not directly linked 'development' and dosage.
Make sure anyone who perscribes howmones is monitoring your liver and kidneys
Dayna
My 2 pennies worth
What drives the whole process should be the blood tests. Serum levels of estrogen should be in puberty levels for a women. The amount of estrogen you ingest should be set to provide those levels. The levels are also affected by metabolism and size and the amount of fat you have in your body as estrogen gets created (and possibly retained) in fat tissue to a certain extent as I understand it. So the amount of serum estrogen levels is the sum of oral intake plus body generated hormones.
It is not rocket science.
That said, 1.25 mg seems low to me considering your body size. I am 5'7.5" and pre-op I was taking 4 mg of estradiol ( never premarin ) after estinyl estradiol went off the market. For estinyl, pre-op, I was taking about 2 to 3 .05mg tabs per day. I was for the most part of HRT only 110 pounds or so, so I had little body fat to retain it and the stuff did not persist in my system for people with higher body fat levels.
As for results, well that is determined by genes. Hip fat, like other posters have said, is actually relatively rare and that is why some people have turned to silicone (don't do that) to get those curves. I have a shape not really due to a large amount of hip fat but due to the fact I lucked out during puberty and got a considerable amount of hip bone expansion ( still have the stretch marks ) during that brief estrogen ( too brief damn it! ) surge at the start of puberty. By staying thin I have a junior miss figure consequently. I have gained some weight, up to 116 now as I am well middle aged, and have not gained much in hips at all, goes more to my tummy. Having parents who are apple shaped, I know better than to think weight gain will give me the right curves.
You cannot tell your body where to put your fat. I had to have breast implants as I come from a line of women who are small breasted and you tend to be one cup size smaller than that. Since my mom was only a 34A when she was at a healthy weight. Well let's say I developed VERY little naturally.
Only you know your genetic history but losing weight may very well be the most important thing for you.
Edit: As for facial hair, hormones rarely does anything for it. The older you are the less effective hormones is btw, due to longer exposure to testosterone, forgot to mention the age factor, sorry. I transitioned hormonally at about age 24. I know of one TS who works at my local Costco and, nope, very little change in her body shape and proportions. Oh and I did do 100mg spiro like most TS these days.
Kim
Electrolysis
Have you considered electrolysis? I've bee going once a week since 2009. I am a fair haired person however my facial hairs seems to contiue growing. I can say I have no hairs above my lip and no hairs below my lip to my chin. youy may want to see a person to hep you with your makeup so you wont have that boyish look. I'm sure the right colors and base can eradicate that problem.
I've always had breasts, bit the were only a "B" cup in the size all the other women purchase. i had breast implants to go to a "C" cup now I have a better selection of bras.
Just hang in there genetic females did not just suddenly appear to be a stunning person.
Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.
Here's a link
that will give you some information about dosages.
http://www.transgendercare.com/medical/resources/tmf_program...
Portia