Homecoming, so to speak

Yesterday was just a little bit rough, with the combination of medicines having an adverse reaction that both made my stomach turn, and dropped my blood pressure to a dangerous level. Both of those issues were resolved safely and without need for a visit to the E.R. thankfully, and this morning I have to admit I’m feeling pretty good all in all. It probably has to do with this being the first time in two months that I’ve truly been able to “feel” like Zoe inside and out. Let me explain. :-)

This morning, Mom made the comment that she thought I’d lost weight with all that’s been going on. I never paid much attention to what the scales say, so the day’s reading didn’t mean much to me (that and I couldn’t remember what the hospital scales said two months ago either). There was only one other measure I could think of.

A few months ago I had the great fortune to luck upon a beautiful summer dress on sale (pictured here — note, that is not me :-P), but the fit was just a little too tight. Somehow, today, it feels like it fits much more comfortably, and as an added bonus brings that unique “How could I ever doubt this is who I’m meant to be?” feeling I’ve missed these last months.

It isn’t the clothing, but what it represents, the affirmation of my inner being … Well, that and the number of times, including when out on a date once, I’ve been called “Miss”, “Ma’am”, or in a group, “Ladies” :-) Or when I wear jewelry with androgynous clothing, little, subtle hints as to who I am.

It’s like someone once said here on the site. When it comes down to it, it’s all camouflage to help others see us as we see ourselves.

But I digress. It’s just too bad summer’s over, but there’s always next year.

Now, my doctor’s orders are to take it easy, so I’m going to do exactly that. I have lots of writing to catch up on. I’m already working on at least one Halloween story though whether it will be TG-themed or not I haven’t determined yet, plus I need to finish BDC and of course, the next chapter of Robin

As a final aside on the weight loss thing, part of it is because of a radical shift in my diet, but now that the heat wave has finally broken here, I plan to get back to regularly exercising again too.

All my best,
~ Zoe

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