I started to post this as a comment on a specific story, then decided it makes more sense as an observation about tg fiction in general than a criticism on a specific story, because the problem I noticed (if it is a problem) is pretty common.
Namely, an awful lot of characters in tg fiction, when they find out about another character being transsexual or gay or both, have one of two extreme reactions -- total, instant acceptance, with displays of affection (if the author wants us to sypathize with the character) or extreme bigotry, very vocal and possibly violent (if the author wants us not to sympathize).
Sure, those are the most dramatic reactions, and story is built on drama; but intermediate reactions are not uncommon in real life, though much less common in fiction. For instance, being somewhat squeamish or even squicked out by the idea of sex change, or gay sex, yet not disapproving of gays or TSs in principle. Or conversely, disapproving on principle but trying to be nice about it, -- not being mean or loud about their disapproval. Or neither disapproving nor particularly squicked, but still having a lot of annoying misconceptions that make a relationship awkward until they're cleared up.
For a decent fictional example of the former reaction, look at Buffy's reaction to Willow coming out in Buffy the Vampire Slayer -- though there her embarrassed reaction is played for comedy in a way that's not suitable for all genres. I can't think of any fictional examples of disapproving-but-polite, but there are certainly people like that in real life; how common they are I'm not sure, but I suspect they're more common than the vocal, violent bigots that are such a staple of tg fiction. They're less noticeable, of course -- if you don't go out of your way to ask their opinion, or put them in a position where they have to speak up or imply approval by their silence, they may never tell you how they disapprove of you. Or they may say so once, as politely as they can manage, and then shut up about it. That can still be hurtful -- or outright traumatic, depending on the closeness of the relationship and the emotional fragility of the person they're talking to -- but we should try, at least as authors working on characterization, to get in their heads and realize they don't intend to hurt.
Another possible reaction is a "meh" -- "Oh, good for you. Yeah, I know several gay people, being transsexual's not all that different, is it? Fine, but don't expect me to be all vocally affirming and stuff."
Thinking about those, and other possible reactions, could help us work out more nuanced characterization for our stories.
Comments
Real life
can be offer more options than we have time to use in writing fiction. Most people are either for you or have obvious difficulty. Some of those who say supportive things like, "It won't make any difference, only the clothes are different," will become less and less comfortable and eventually avoid you. Others who started off with difficulty will eventually get their heads round it and cope very well.
Again in real life, the way the individual is told might influence they way they accept it. But at the end of the day, it's their problem and they have to deal with it as best they can. I lost people I thought were friends and I gained others I thought had denounced me, but who eventually dealt with it.
We also have to accept that we don't know what other's experiences might be. One colleague had no problem with me because she'd known someone else who'd done the same, perhaps as well, knowing me may help some others deal with it in the future.
But it's a valid point nonetheless.
Angharad
Angharad
I had no one who confronted
I had no one who confronted me face to face. Instead, people whose homes I was welcome in and often invited to simply didn't extend invitations anymore. What I thought was friendship has simply faded away. While I was working, I was sometimes treated as though I might be a ticking bomb, or the way some treat people with a mental problem.
Others are perfectly willing to be in social situations with me, but do not initiate the social events. If they have a party celebrating some milestone of family or themselves, they don't bother telling me. That can make you very lonely, but it is also a measure of the fact they are uncomfortable with you or feel you will make some of their other social friends uncomfortable. You just have to start trying to build new relationships, maybe with people who do not care.
I do have some old friends who are OK with my transition, and I do socialize with, so it is not everyone. However, in some strange way, even then there is a sense of being held at arms length by some of them. I have wondered if this sense is true, or if I am holding myself back because I am diffident about pushing people. I always have been that way, possibly a result of always knowing I was different and just playing a role as a male for so many years?
CaroL
CaroL
Henry Kissinger
Once said when discussing options presented to him by state department analysts it was 1- Nuclear Armageddon 2- Uncondtional surrender or 3- Their plan.
People are either friends, people who dislike you, or persons are apathetic. So you're going to get extreme reactions.
"True friends stab you in the front."- Oscar Wilde.
Daniel, author of maid, whore, bimbo, and sissy free TG fiction since 2000
What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.- Oscar Levant
As far as...
As far as characters are concerned, I think a lot depends on the story. A short story can get away with fewer fully fleshed out characters and the supporter or detractor character makes sense. A novel, on the other hand, can have the time for a character to develop along the lines you (or the others) describe.
I've thought about how folks depict characters in stories... And, suspect that many reactions are based on either expected or experienced reactions with others. And, the strong reactions - those are the most immediately memorable and thus come to mind faster.
Anne
It's a spectrum
There are varying degrees of acceptance and the way people respond. My own family cannot comprehend what transsexual is the associate it with homosexuality. In fact that is the comment I receive the most, "oh, you're gay." Which to me is an entirely different issue. I am talking about gender orientation and they are talking about sexual orientation.
That said. I think I show a good selection of responses to TG in my God Bless the Child series. Melissa was excepting of the cross dressing but wary of transsexualism, Chase was initially against it, but in the end came around. J.D. was totally supportive. Pastor Don was accepting at first but also misinformed (people generally miss his mistake because I didn't have him come right out and say it but he thought Jenny was intersex or had a genetic abnormality that was fixed) Pastor Zarchy was totally against it. Skeeter was initially against it, but became accepting when he was further informed.
But that character is a child and, though it is never said outright, evidently passes for a female very well. I think when it happens to an adult there are other things to consider. Like, does the person feel a sense of betrayal? What do their core beliefs tell them of the obscure (Be frightened or explore)? How long have they known the character? What image did the character portray before they came out (I have always been rough and outspoken, but if I behave docile and submissive because that is my female persona, perhaps the other person would be more upset about the duality of personalities than the transsexual issue).
These are some of the things to explore when considering reactions.
K.T. Leone
My fiction feels more real than reality
Katie Leone (Katie-Leone.com)
Writing is what you do when you put pen to paper, being an author is what you do when you bring words to life
All reactions differ depending on the person
As an example, here comes the shameless plug, read "Show me the Money" for different reactions to coming out. Surprise, Anger, supportive and not. There aren't the Oh God, I'm so glad you're a girl comments, but mixed reactions to the transition. Arecee
Reactions
In my own personal life I've seen a lot of condemnation and very little acceptance from the people that knew me before. Among new acquaintances there was still at least a 60% rejection rate. Anymore I fly under the radar in stealth mode. Nobody gets close to me anymore so there is no lying, and no complaining or rejection. Nuanced? Is there any real difference between "You spawn of Satan, you're going to Hell" and "You nasty pervert, don't you have to register or something?".
Karen J.
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin