Today I went shopping at Target (one of the chain stores in Australia). The thing is that I only recently gave myself the go ahead to crossdress. Even if it has mostly been at home (I live on my own). The only time I went into the city with womens clothes was on halloween, and even then some guy on the train did a double take when seeing me - this sort of freaked me out - I'm really worried about being seen in public.
I must be honest, as this is the first time I went into a store to buy woman's clothes, I did feel kind of embarrased. When I wasked the store ladies for help, instead of saying anything to indicate that the clothes were for me, I said 'she wants me to get'.
I got some normal panties, some lovely satin, black panties and a bra.This afternoon I ordered a gaff and some tg panties on the net. I haven't really told anyone of my need or want to crossdress except for my social worker. Yes, I see a mental health social worker, came about because I became depressed. She asked me if I tried to kill myself because I want to be a woman. I was actually surprised by that because I really didn't think about that at the time, so I truthfully told her no.
But then I started thinking about what she said. And I thought, maybe if I shift my thouts around to how I was thinking at the time, maybe that was part of it. Mostly it was other stuff but there probably is something in that statement that is true.
I have a theory that a person would be able to change without any medical work but to get there would mean leaving everything that makes up our current lives behind. But about that later - actually not. (I might turn that idea into a story here).
I was hit by a car when I was 10 and had a brain stem injury. But from there I taught myself to walk, talk almost do everything all over again and I will toot my horn impressively because ... it sort of is; the doctors called me "A WALKING MIRACLE". And so don't go and say straight out - 'Cliff, what is this, you must be insane, that's impossible. Pleeeeeeeeease don't say that, because like Captain James T. Kirk of the USS Enterprise says, "I don't believe in the impossible." (and no, I'm not a trekkie, I just liked the movies.) I have a past to prove it.
What did cause the depression was the fact that all of the aches and pains started catching up with me and I felt like I was going backward, I felt that I had no friends but only aquaintances and I thought, I will not go through all of that again. And that took me to the brink becoming a woman is just a thought of creating your own reality. And I don't know if I have the strength and patience to test my theory out.
But going back to the clothes, I think I need some help. My social worker said I look like a size 14. This really threw me, I mean, can't womens cloting have the same numbers. Yes, I know you probably know all about measuresments...haha...but remember I'm new at this. So I now Know a 14 is about 34 in mens. I got a 14 bra, while it fits, it's reaaally tight. So maybe a 16. What's that a 35-36? And then getting a tg bra is something else completely - maybe I'm stupid- probably not but there's always the possibility *chuckle*.
I bought some really cool, sexy lingere (I think that's the wrong spelling, but I really couldn't care) to sleep in but the panties annoy me 'cos they for any size so you have to tie up the sides and I have had 3 shoulder surgeries this year, so you can see tying tthem up is a tremendous hassle.
Anyways, thanks to all you lovely people out there who have taken thier time to listen...er...read my litte ranting conversation.
I just needed to get that out.
xoxoxo Cliff xoxoxo
I'll say this here because it's my blog and noone can stop me expressing myself...heeeeeeeee...
I LOVE YOU ALL. <3
Comments
Early memories
Well, you brought up some old memories for me.
It was about ten years ago in a Target store (South Bend, Indiana, USA) when I timidly ventured in to acquire a packet of knickers. I used the size label on the packet to determine size. And, truth be told, I didn't believe at that time that it was really possible for me to transition.
Silly me...
I do believe that there are things that are just not possible, right now. (I still haven't gotten the knack that Douglas Adams suggested for flying... throwing one's self at the ground and missing... but this may just be a personal problem.) Still, shouldn't one try? =)
Best wishes,
Janet
Mistress of the Guild of Evil [strawberry] Blonde Proofreaders
Janet
Mistress of the Guild of Evil [Strawberry] Blonde Proofreaders
To be or not to be... ask Schrodinger's cat.
old memories?
F***, if they old memories for you you are lucky! I don't know how old you were when you started but I'm 37 in March. It's a bit scary for me at this stage of the game.
sizes
Go to a store that sells sewing supplies and get yourself a flexible plastic or fabric measuring tape. (The metal ones that rugged manly men use for carpentry simply won't do!) Measure around your nipples; that's your bust - if you're planning on padding your chest measure with the padding in place. Measure at a little below your navel; that's where your feminine waist would be - if you're going to wear a compression garment all the time (a waist nipper or girdle) take this measurement with it on. And measure around the widest part of your hips - if you're going to wear a padded brief take this measurement while wearing it. Then take those three numbers and consult a chart like this one, and you'll see what sizes to take.
Now bra sizing is like doing a math problem. Different countries use different standards, and there's some variation from one manufacturer to another. I'd recommend going to the website for the brand you want and click on their sizing information. Here is a page with a calculator that should give you a general idea.
Whoa! No!
"Measure at a little below your navel; that's where your feminine waist would be."
No. Measure at the narrowest part of your trunk, which should be in between the bottom of your ribcage (at the side) and the top of your hip-bone.
I say this because my navel is about four inches below my natural waistline. Don't assume that your own body proportions are like those of anyone else. Mind you, I have the highest waistline of anyone I know, male or female. Just sayin'.
Also, measuring the widest part of your hips can be interesting. On a Real Female (tm) the widest part tends to be quite high, say 3-4" below the waistline. On a typical male, the widest part of the hip area is often much lower than this, about where your bum sticks out. If you measure higher up and buy clothes to fit that, you might be able to shimmy into them but there's no way you're going to be sitting down any time soon.
Penny
waisting away
It depends on what kind of garment you're trying to fit into. Measuring your narrowest point of your body will work for many separates, but if you want to know if an off-the-rack dress is going to fit you, you need to measure where the designer of that dress expects your waist to be.
Another important measurement that I left out was height. You need to know whether to shop in regular, tall or petite sizes. As far as I can tell from their website, Target Australia doesn't seem to make that distinction, so if you're outside the average women's height range, you may need to shop elsewhere.
sigh
I'm about 5'6 and 36 waist and chest. Don't know where else I could go. A dressmaker is a bit extreme and expensive (more than I've got). Can you recommend someplace?
I need shoes now *sigh* I'm pretty much dreading learning to walk in heels (maybe I'll start low).
What I'd really like is to meet a tg/cc girl who can show me the ropes.
Cliff ;)
petite
Cliff, a 36 in waist and chest makes you only like a size 12 in the US. Maybe even a 10, depending on the cut (go bigger for a jacket). In the UK iyou would be more like a 14 or 16, and Australian sizes are like the UK I think. There are lots of women in all 3 countries who are similarly sized, and not all of them have narrow waists.
If you're aiming for, say, a 40" bust, you'd be looking at a bigger size, obviously. You can try starving yourself or padding yourself. Up to you how pleasurable you want to make the experience. I starved myself when I was starting out - it's not a sustainable way to live ;)
If you want to order online, check the online sizing at places like http://www.gap.com/customerService/info.do?cid=2312 . For Australia, if it's like the UK, add a size when buying your local brands. I found this with minimal googling: http://www.witchery.com.au/sizes/w1/i2728619/- if I'm doing centimetres to inches right it seems like you would be a 14 in Australian sizing for tops, and probably smaller for skirts. For dresses, go for the size 14.
Some manufacturers do S, M, L, XL, which can be confusing but offers a bit of slack either way. You're probably only an L if the measurements you've provided are accurate.
Check on ebay, it's a good place to get clothes too. :)
You shouldn't have too much trouble buying anything.
Good luck!
not as think as i smart i am
Thanks Rebecca!
Thanks Rebecca!
Sizes
Not sure I'd rely on that Witchery chart too much, it seems very generous. Aus and UK sizes are generally close. US go one down. ie Oz size 12 is US 10. Shoes males size go up 3. ie Mens 7 -- Womans 10...usually. A 36 inch waist puts you well above a 12. When I first started shopping I used a shoe lace. Two knots at the point where my best fitting pants were when flat and buttoned. Or if you can feel it and know that against your body; that is where they sit relative to your hip bones..hey it only takes a couple of seconds. Hangers complicate things*grin*.
For example underbust I'm 34" (86cm), Bust is 38"(96cm) B cup due to broader than average (female) back. That makes me in tops a likely 16, sometimes a 14 depending. clothes are a bitch... that's why girls go shopping. you have to try them on. At 5'6" you shouldn't have any torso or sleeve length problems which is a plus.
Oh my waist line is about 5cm above my navel. 28" (71cm) yeah I haven't been exercising like I should. Hips probably about 10-12cm below the point of your hip bones, about 40" in my case. So I'm an ectomorph, long and lean. And yes I do have the torso and sleeve length problem. Clothes are a bitch, but they can be fun.
Kristina
Here is another
handy size chart. It has a conversion for shoes too. No outfit is complete without the right shoes!
Hugs!
Grover
I've still got a skirt
and two tops I bought in Target in Perth in 1994, the tops were decorated with aboriginal art. They were quite good quality.
Angharad
Angharad
A good start
Dear Cliff,
My sincere congratulations top this first bold step out in the new world. I do so well remember my first step out to the world of womanhood. I cannot tell if you will go "all the way", but do not let that qustion stop your pathes as crossdresser. It took me 5 years to see what would be my true future.
And I have to say that the things that you chosed could have been copied from my personal diary. As things developed some of the arousing clotes came more and more in the background, mostly as they are not always nice to wear.
A couple of things that I found out during those first years that might be of help to you.
1. Fake breasts. From transport protecting foam rupper I nibbled out the forms. That material is so light you will need no gluing, and as it is scrap material you can do them over and over agian till you have found the form and size that will suite you. My advice is tio start on the smaller range.
2. Gaff. Can be uncomfortable to use. I bought some tights with a control top. That allows you to position what needs to be hidden in an upright position against your belly. Those tights are more expensive than normal tights, and they ruin as easily, BUT then you can cut off the ruined pparts and just use the top and keep things in an orderly way.
3. Getting to feel good in the the womens departments in malls (and like places) just look on how GGs walk around there. They do have a hard time to find material colors and cuttings that suite them. Do the same for yourself. Just hold up a dress in front of you at a mirror and then with a nanchalant manor just return it to the place you got it from. Or just walk along and feel the quality of the clotes tesing one to the right and another to the left. And soon you will experience what all women have told you over all yeras. One might walk through a LARGE womens department without finding anything that will get you jubilant. I never believed that until I was there myself.
Again congrats on your first experiences
Your
Ginnie
GinnieG
i remember doing that
i am slowly getting better at just saying its for me. I keep track of the stores that are cool with that, and i will give them all my business. As for sizing, i have found that just knowing your measurements isnt enough. What size fits depends on style, cut, how tight or loose it is supposed to be, and even who makes the clothes. If you can not bring yourself to try on stuff in the store, make sure you keep receipts and keep tags on until you know they fit. with underwear, most stores will not take returns, so it is vital to get the best fit possible, otherwise you will be stuck with stuff you cant wear.
"Treat everyone you meet as though they had a sign on them that said "Fragile, under construction"
dorothycolleen