Yesterday 11/15 on the Steve Wilkos Show there was a young 15 year old transgender MTF on the show talking about bullying she was prettier than many transgender girls with good clothes & makeup done very tastefully and may I say that it took bigger balls to go on the show that all the bullies put together
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I went out and found the clip. She looks ok, not remarkable. Kids seem more accepting of alternate expressions these days I think because there is more and more of it around them and in the media. Popular media (TV, movies) does not help due to them using it as a gag subject. \
When I was a teen being gay was social suicide. You could not go there. Being transgendered was not something you had any avenue to pursue, find help or expression. You just toughed it out. So many of the friends I met later in life in the gender community were Vietnam vets who signed up and volunterd for some of the worst combat assignments or other dangerous jobs, hopefully let someone else pull the trigger and die an honorable death. Instead they came back, demons intact.
12 November
All I could find on the teen bullying was a clip from the 12 November show, not 15 November. Is this the right clip?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eaJ4o_UkmSc
12 NOV
Yes Edeyn, I belive you are right.
Theres a remarkable difference
Theres a remarkable difference between easing of suffering, telling shades of the truth (outright lieing)and fooling oneself. I have heard people justify their claims of being I/S with the story of hormonal brain/body mismatch in the womb, so that meant they had a female brain therefore they are I/S.
I even met someone who believed this crock and was quite indignant when I mistakenly included them in a reference the the TS community. It was all I could do to not spew Pepsi out my nose.
You seem to carry a great deal of emotion about this.
I wonder if you would care to elaborate further about your feelings? I think that you may mirror the feelings of quite a few people.
One thing about the T arena that I am quite sure of, is that most T folk I have talked to say that it is quite involuntary. A simple lie detector test could yeild some interesting results. I was brutally castigated by my church and it left me quite hurt. They out and out called me a liar. I only wish that I had known what I know now and that I had not been doped out of my mind on legal medication. In retrospect, my medication was because of PTSD I suffered during and after 9/11. Of course I will not even attempt to compare it with your combat experiences. Still, being frightfully abused at the hands of an Amish stepfather, and later seeing my wonderful country nearly fall into the hands of some very unscrupulous power hungry nogs, just frightened me out of my mind. If the American public had any idea what nearly happened right here within the country ... They are and shall remain almost completely clueless about what some people wanted to do here. Homeland Security, as bad as they are, were the compromise.
Much peace
Gwendolyn
Mirth Gwen
Mirth Gwen, amusement as I watch the extent people will go to manipulate reality in order to come up with a story that will get people to buy their presentaton.
We've all been though our own private little hell in order to get here. Now we are here in this moment, not back there. When reality intrudes and the self illusions start to crumble it is easy to fall back on one's treasured wounds. Each time this happens there is a failure that drags that all forward and we start over again, maybe we will set it aside and begin to grow in the moment or maybe we curl up with our treasured wounds as a mantle hoping they will somehow protect us?
Its common Gwen as it is also predictable. So yes, I do feel strong emotion about it, I am feeling amusement and disbelief :)
Gwen said:
"My best wishes for this young child. Hopefully, she will have the sense to come up with a credible "Intersexed" story, and not ever admit that she was ever a genetic male. It is the bane of T folk, I mean the fact that I do not know how many times my past has slashed me from the shadows, inflicting grevious wounds."
-and-
"I don't know what I did to set you off?
Submitted by Gwen Brown on Tue, 2010/11/16 - 12:05pm.
It was my intention to simply try to ease the suffering of those around me."
Gwen, first of all, nothing "set me off" unless writing a reply that is not sympathetic is considered somehow going off? Going back to what started all of this, how about just telling them the truth instead of making up elaborate lies? Lieing to people is not protecting them from pain, its just lieing.
Wilkos Show
Yes Edeyn that is the clip and I got it on monday 11/15 maybe it was friday OH WELL you found the right clip and I still think she looks good and presents herself well.How did my comment get to be a fight of word between you 2 no names needed HUGS RICHIE
Even ten years ago, kids
Even ten years ago, kids could sometimes be more accepting than their parents. I say sometimes because there are exceptions on both sides.
I made the mistake of coming out about being transgendered (I didn't even know that word existed at the time, despite having internet access :-P so I didn't really know what to call it) to someone I thought was a trustworthy friend my Junior year of high school, and I found out a few months ago that apparently to this day, people still think I'm gay because that's what she blabbed all over school :-P
But nobody ever teased or bullied me, or said one word about it, hence my only just finding out this last year that anyone ever even thought such.
That said, I would never have had the guts to publically come out as a teenager, and that was before my emotional trauma that put me firmly back in the closet. I'd go stealth, at best, but I could never go on national TV and out myself.
I love what the other kid said at the end, "At the end of the day, the people that are teasing us? They couldn't last a day in our shoes."
I'd be interested to see how long the apology/truce lasts between the girl and the bully though. Something about his tone when he apologized sounded kind of forced, but maybe that's just the paranoid cynical bitch talking. :-)
I'll keep up hope for the best for both of 'em though. I want to believe that all humans have the ability to grow and open their minds just a tiny bit, especially at that age.
Well said Zoe
You are fortunate that whispers are as far as it went. I'm glad you came away from it without deeper scars.
I feel that being labled as gay would be mild to them compared to a boy saying he is a girl? Bullies feed on the the ones they think are the weaker ones or even just different because they think other people will be of like mind. Maybe it is fear on their part? I wish these shows would spend more time just interviewing the bullies. Not attacking them but some serious Q & A, get in their heads and to the root of their feelings; what drives a bully? I honestly feel they don't think but react taking out their fear, anger and frustrations on an easy target maybe?
I agree
I definitely think you're on to something with what drives a bully. In my writing, my most notorious villain is exactly like that, based off what I watched a friend briefly go through, sort of an Alpha Male mentality thing.
It was only 'briefly' because the aggressor was a 300lb gorilla defensive lineman on our high school football team, and he only had to push my friend around twice before the coach got involved and put a stop to it with threats of being thrown off the team if he kept it up (This was our senior year. He was a dumb ox, but he wasn't dumb enough to risk losing his big fish/small pond star status :-))
Likewise, my half-brother was probably the biggest source of grief in my life. He was always so angry, and he took it out everyone around him.
Sometimes I wonder if peer pressure comes into the picture as well, but without personal experience I can only guess.
I'd be very interested in seeing what makes bullies tick, as you say, getting inside their heads :-D
I belive you are right.
I belive you are right.