I just posted the last of God Bless the Child and published Unreachable. That is going to be it for me. It has been a great ride. I had some laughs, shed some tears, but I'm really not cut out to be an author. I don't have what it takes and it has become obvious. There is a certain level of attention to detail to produce a good story, and I don't have that ability. It is more than just not getting reads and comments and kudos and reviews.
For 1. I am too competitive and there is no way I can be number 1. The story with the most hits on this site is less than 200 words long and I can't compete with it. I will never be a best seller on Amazon either.
2. I am too fragile. I take everything personally. Low reviews hurt. Being told that your stupid is one thing, being shown is more damning. I change character names, I don't know punctuation, and I constantly get words wrong.
3. Don't fit in. This crops up every now and again and it did so again today. People do not want to read what I write. I mix two things that probably shouldn't go together and I'm tired of defending my beliefs. I am a transgender Christian. But people from both sides can't accept that the two can coexist. I am not going to leave the Christian part out of my writing because that is a part of me and when I did write, I bore my sole.
So, it's be fun and all. I hope I entertained a few people along the way. I am going to try to work on me for a while. I am close to death as it is, so maybe this is a good thing. Instead of writing, I can go for walks. Take care.
Comments
That's unfortunate. I rather
That's unfortunate. I rather enjoy a great deal of your writing. A Patch of Ice Christmas was a favourite of mine. It's true though that I don't care for heavy mixing of Christianity and transgender writing. I'm not interested in Christianity. But I need to stress that it is not the case that the two cannot coexist. There are clearly quite a few Christian transgender people on this site. In terms of reading material, I love Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. They have very obvious Christian themes and underlying messages. The same goes with your work. That being said, if your writing is going to explicitly focus on the Christian narrative then you're going to alienate readers who don't agree with the lifestyle. For that reason I wasn't able to read Growing Up Jenny. It focused too much, for my tastes, on Christianity.
You should know that I still really enjoyed God Bless This Child and I loved your other works. I didn't re-read it as you posted it again because I've already read it and didn't have time to do it over. You shouldn't feel dejected because there are non-Christians that don't like reading Christian work. That's a fact of the world. There are perhaps 2 billion Christians in the world, that means the overwhelming majority (70%) of people in this world are non-Christian.
You should never expect your messages and your themes and opinions to resonate with everyone. That's impossible. No Christian will fit in with everyone because everyone has a different world view. Some agree with religions, some don't. Some believe in a god or gods and some don't. Some think Muhammad was the final prophet. Some think Jesus was the son of God and humanity's saviour. Some believe the Buddha was an avatar of Vishnu meant to deceive people. Some believe that Prince Shotoku was born walking and talking. Some people believe that Maitreya will one day appear to the masses and teach the pure Dharma. Others believe that when you die you will live eternally. It would be impossible for you to appease everyone or to say something that others wouldn't challenge.
Sorry to hear...
As a 50+ year old combat veteran and Christian I am sorry to hear that you will no longer continue to write. I have enjoyed all of the stories that you have posted here. Even if you don't continue writing, I hope that you continue to remain here at BCTS.
I have enjoyed your writing.
Are you sure you are not measuring things wrong. Some things may not indicate what you think they do.
Note: the following going to be disjointed!
For one example:
I would guess right off the bat that one of the shorter stories would have the most hits, why because its shorter, some people don't read the long stuff, bu those who do usually also read the short stuff too. And there is of some longer stuff here is incomplete. IT makes people shy away from them.
You are selling stuff isn't that a mark of success?
People react to your work, that means it is reaching them. And don't forget that ANY position will be disliked by some.
I have seen plenty of tech writing mistakes in works by long time big name writers and they have paid proofreaders.
You don't fit in, well seems Trans don't fit in period, too bad they better make room!
Yes, take walks, work on you, take care of your health, but don't give up on other things to.
Books on kindle may show less hits here, I don't think that should be seen as negative.
(Excuse the ramblynes,s It is late & I probably should not be posting while my brain is trying to nap.)
Why do you write?
Yes, it's what I've told numerous authors who've got upset because of negative reviews or low numbers of comments, but it's still true.
Why do you write?
Is it because you've got a story in your head that you want to get out, or because you desperately want to be a successful author?
Different stories fit different demographics: TG stories fit a minority demographic, and a story where the protagonist's religious commitment is more than simply turning up at the place of worship once a week (and possibly getting involved in community outreach work) suits an even smaller demographic. Therefore, it's foolish to compare your stories to more mainstream TG fiction or even drabbles / very short stories (which likely have such a high hit count as they can be read in under five minutes, so don't require much time or committment from the reader; unlike even a multi-part story where each chapter's only a couple of thousand words long, where the expectation is the reader will be investing more time in the tale as they read each part).
Look instead on the flip side of the coin: have your stories had any hits / kudos / comments?
Hits are a gross overestimate of how many people have read the tale, as it just counts the number of times the page has been loaded. If someone loads it then hits refresh a dozen times, that's a dozen hits - the vast majority of hit counters aren't smart enough to detect hits from the same computer. Kudos are a slight underestimate, as only one can be recorded per chapter per unique user, but while incredibly quick and easy to fire off, different people have different thresholds of "good story" - some will hit it if they generally liked it and could more-or-less follow it (tolerating the occasional grammatical error), others probably expect it to be almost perfect before they'll hit it. Comments are the ultimate measure of engagement (rather than merely reading or liking the tale) - most people are reluctant to write something as short as "Good story, I liked it," so those writing comments tend to reflect on what they've read and pick out a specific part of the chapter to discuss or speculate on future events (so don't be surprised if chapters where Something Significant Happenedâ„¢ or end in an exciting cliffhanger receive more comments than 'filler' chapters!)
Even though kudos are a slight underestimate, because they're higher than comments but still reflect unique users, if you receive as little as 5 kudos for a chapter, that means five separate people have taken the time to load the chapter, read it, and hit the button at the end. You may not know who they are or whether they liked the chapter a little or a lot, but it's still five people who you've reached. Your story hasn't gone out into the ether and been ignored - you have connected with five other people. Just redefine your expectations: instead of thinking you're reading the story on stage in a giant concert hall, think of yourself reading it in the corner of a library or in your living room to a more select group of people. Don't forget as well that while you may not have distributed millions of copies of your books on Amazon, you've still managed to distribute a few hundred or so, so that's an additional audience you've got.
Still, if negative comments are getting you down, feel free to take a break from writing. Go out for walks, stock up on apples and carrot sticks to snack on, and above all, think positive! :)
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Building Rome in a day
Hi Katie,
I’ll get straight to the point...
Ever heard of subliminal advertising? Something that is underlying other material and lodges in the brain to keep working on it even when the person is unaware it is there or has affected them. A form of conditioning, if you will.
When an author writes, part of what they put on paper (or in electronic formats - and electrons are power (sic) - LOL) is subliminal. It can’t be helped, we all place a bias of a sort into the material we write. If we never write a or any of our characters as partying, drunken abusers of other people, we are unconsciously (or perhaps intentionally) placing a bias into our characters which will affect both the story and our readers, whether they ( or we )are aware of it or not. This means we are having an effect on the reading world. We are demonstrating our viewpoint and that will cause those who do not wish to consider that viewpoint (as well as those who do) to react to it.
Therefore, even though negative criticism hurts... stop and think about what has just happened.
Someone found the material sufficiently disturbing to their own lifestyle to take the time to comment on it or to attack it. Either way you have caused them to halt, consider, and react. That is how you win converts. That is how you cause people to continue to think about alternate views, and that is how you slowly cause them to eventually come to examine their own values and possibly change them. It isn’t done by force-feeding it to the readers but by placing it in every underlying action your characters take.
Positive reactions? Those people are already aware and or agree with your viewpoint as expressed by your characters.
Negative reactions? Congratulations, you are causing someone to question their own morals and to be concerned enough about what they see in themselves that they must try to attack the cause.
No reaction? Again congratulations, they are thinking and while it might take them some time, you have planted a mustard seed.
See?
You have caused people to become aware, to react, to think. That is the purpose of being an author. Yes, it is nice to be able to write about what we like and feel and to place it into our characters and use them to quietly make a statement. If you get negative comments then I’d say you are becoming successful at this. Positive comments, others find your material uplifting, and informative, even entertaining. No comments, your material is still working on them - don’t despair. As they say, “Rome wasn’t built in a day.â€
;-) Anesidora
Lines have no endpoints
As I'm sure you see from the comments here, you have plenty of fans on this site, so you have made an impact. I hope you're not pulling your work from Amazon - it's already done, and you never know, people might buy it even if you're not pushing it. I'm going to go the other way and wish you the best of luck in what you try next. Let us know what it is and how it works - you have friends after all.
Scott Adams wrote an article recently ( Fail your way to success ) about not following your passion. Rather, passion tends to come from succeeding at something. So by all means, try something new. If it turns out to be successful, I've no doubt you'll find yourself loving that instead.
And hey, if time off gets you to come back to writing, be sure of one thing. We'll all be happy to welcome you back.
Best of luck,
Titania
Lord, what fools these mortals be!
I am sorry to read your decision Katie!!!!
Katie,
I often wonder how many people know the story of that ill fated flight on 03 February 1959, and that of the artists Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens, and J. P. "The Big Bopper" Richardson, that were taken on that day.
Using todays parameters for the music industry, I often wonder if that flight hadn't crashed of the 3, which would have made it big and which would have been a flash in the pan. This I am sure can not be answered.
My point though is this, Richie Valens had made it big and Buddy Holly had faded into obscurity, Richie Valens would still be a house hold name, and it'd be Buddy Who!!!
Thus all three are Famous postumously.
I have not read all of 'God Bless the Child - 10th Anniversary Edition' yet, as I began to read chapters 1+2 for some reason I found myself wanting to read it in its entirety, I can't explain that, I will read it soon, and I will let you know how I feel.
Some people set standards and goals too high, some would say impossibly high, thus the person following them is from the outset is going to be a failure, and some are set so low the person following them will become an adequate person and never reach thier potential.
I believe that you Katie fit into that first category, in that those personal standards and goals that you set for yourself, you have set yourself up to fail. You are overly critical of yourself and of your works, I think that you should ease up on yourself and stop beating yourself up, then you will be happier in yourself.
end of line
Katie
Please PLEASE PLEASE DON'T LET a****** drive your light under a bushell. I for one need your great talent to help me get through day to day.
I love your work and replace my past through it.
Keep the faith and me sane.
LOVE YA GIRL
Oh, Katie, no! Others have
Oh, Katie, no! Others have said lots of good things. I'll be brief.
You are a good writer. Do you sometimes make minor mistakes? Of course, everyone does. That's why God made editors. Do you think that all the successful published writers put their unedited works out there to the public?
Do you really have to be #1? Do 29 baseball teams quit playing forever because they didn't win the World Series? Do the authors who are #2 through #10 on the best seller list quit writing because they weren't #1? If everybody who wasn't #1 quit, there wouldn't be much left, would there? The world would be a rather empty, dull sphere.
There are always going to be negative comments. Some people get off on trying to tear others down. It makes them feel bigger. They are jerks. They are beneath contempt. They don't deserve a moment of you time or attention.
You do need to take time for yourself. Getting healthy should be a priority in your life. In your blog, I sense some depression. If writing helps clear your mind, or helps you make sense of the world, then write. It can be for your own personal therapy, no one else has to read it if that's your choice. But don't give it up.
Kris
{I leave a trail of Kudos as I browse the site. Be careful where you step!}
I'm Sorry
That you feel that way about your writing and that people can't accept you for you. The world would be very boring if everyone believed in exactly the same things and ways of believing. We were given the right to think for ourselves and thus have our own opinions. PLEASE, take a break of unknown length and heal yourself both physically and mentally. Then decide if you want to stop writing.
Christian Transgender.
I too am a Christian Transgender. Though I'll never transition, there's just to much to lose and not much to gain for me. I'm happy being able to dress the way I feel at home and only butch it up in the outer clothes when I go to church, but all except for work, I wear clothes right off the women's rack, only just enough masculine cut to get by... even then, I push the envelope.
I believe that God doesn't much care what we wear and what gender we see ourselves. He only cares where our heart is. If it's with him, we're golden.
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin eine Mann
I'm afraid I have to disagree
I'm afraid I have to disagree with your self analysis as not being an author.
When you wring my heart and make me shed tears, it's not from reading syntax errors, it's from the compassion and heart that is in your stories - which by the way are excellently put together.
Not having a degree in English language is not a problem - that's why they have proof readers and editors.
You do the clever stuff, let the less talented look after the punctuation!!
XXJen