Hi all,

After a terrible few months in which I hit bottom and tried to end my life, I discovered the difference between a positive or negative outcome is indeed based upon your attitude.

I discovered that my BF was not my best friend after all, and that rain clouds indeed have silver linings, rays of hope and sunshine and that people are willing to help you if you only open yourself and have a desire to pick yourself up and trust in God. Best of all, I met a wonderful person who not only knows everything about me, but still loves me for who I am. It is wonderful to fall asleep next to the one you love, and wake up next to him and SNUGGLE!

I am fortunate that the VA system has come together for me, and while I have to continually educate them on who I am, they are trying and changing the site rules to accommodate and protect me. I was surprised that they really do not know much about transgender/transsexual persons, and that which they do know is often incorrect. It helps that I am willing to be the trail blazer in this case (I still get to hide from public attention), and that my knowledge is sufficient for them. My therapist is wonderful and we frequently go over my alloted time. In fact yesterday we went 2 hours 15 minutes as her next client was a no show. After 8 visits we are still filling out my forms and she is amazed that I survived my hell in the military and childhood life. The wonderful part is I love who I am now and that eases the pain of the past.

So for those of us that are experiencing rain in their lives, look for that silver lining and those rays of sunshine.

Kendra