I am now in the process of several legal thingies. One is FINALLY filing for my legal name change. Yeah, I know, just call me the head procrastinator! LOL!
Secondly, I am ready to file paperwork for a Will, a Power Of Attorney, and a Health Proxy. I've finally recognized that there are more miles on my odometer than are left in my waranty, and I don't want my family distorting what I want and need to have done with my corpus delicious, nor do I want restrictions placed on those most important to me, if I should become unable to speak for myself, as regards who can come and see me and who can't. There are too many horror stories about loved ones being restrained from being with the one they love because they aren't family, legally.
It's not an easy thing, confronting ones own mortality, but it NEEDS to be addressed, and with the urging of my dear, trusted friend, Ariel, I am doing it. I have also given instructions to several people here where I live, to notify my online "family of choice" should anything happen to me, rendering me incapable of doing it myself. Too many times, one of us has simply vanished, leaving the rest of us to wonder and worry. I don't want that happening to any of you. If anything untoward happens to me, you will know about it.
Now I DO plan on staying around as long as I possibly can, so I ain't figuring on heading up (or down) to other pastures for a loooooong time, but I guess "be prepared" is my keyword here. It's better to have this stuff done and ready and not need it, than it is to need it and not have it, right?
I have also begun treatment with Chantix, to help me curb and quit my lifelong affair with cigarettes. I've used it before and I know what to expect re: side effects. I didn't have any last time, and I don't expect any this time, but I'm ready for them if they do rear their ugly heads.
You ALL are my "family of choice", and I thank you all from my heart for your kind words of caring and encouragement. You truly don't know what they've meant to a crotchety old broad like me over the years. To know that one's words and efforts have been noticed and appreciated is a wonderful feeling. If I've helped anyone along the way, I am thankful I had the chance and gratified that something I said or did, helped someone. I think in terms of "paying it forward" because of all the help I have received from so many of you.
God Bless each and every one of you.
Hugs and love from my heart,
Cathy
Comments
two thumbs up
Big hugs
Grover
Ditto
A co-worker at my office has an elderly mother in an assisted living facility. His sister lives in the area and has attempted three times to get control of the poor lady's "estate", which consists entirely of a couple pieces of heirloom jewelry and a box of photographs. His mother has assigned him Power of Attorney and also signed a do not resussitate order.
He carries copies of the paperwork in his briefcase wherever he goes so that it is readily available. His sister has shown behavior before that is not in the Mother's best interest.
It has occurred to me before that the transgender and gay communities might do well to do the same. In emergency situations there is often not time to retrieve necessary paperwork, and intrusive do-gooders can usually be counted on to act in their own best interests instead of the affected individual or individuals.
In our tort happy culture, a little advance planning can pay big dividends in situations such as these.
Congratulations for planning ahead.
Hugs
Carla Ann
Body to Science
Well, I have a DNR and have donated my body to science. I do not care if my grave over looks the Ocean or the City Dump. I've already given away anything that means anything to me. I sleep on an Air Mattress, and have furniture totalling about $50. My clothes, those that you can buy, are worth about$100 to replace. I do have a lovely, ornate Abaya that is hand made and from KSA, and a Black Abaya from Jordan. Do ya think I will care about them after? Hopefully, I will know it is coming and be able to give them to a local Mosque. Oh, I do have an aged Toyota Corolla, that I hope runs for a while.
I think that many T folk, me included, lose everything so many times that "things" just don't matter much any more. As for Death, the last part of Briant's, "Thanatopsis", is how I hope that I will confront it. And no, Inshallah, I will not allow the door to hit me in the ass. And, NO, I am not depressed or upset.
So live, that when thy summons comes to join
The innumerable caravan which moves
To that mysterious realm where each shall take
His chamber in the silent halls of death,
Thou go not, like the quarry-slave at night,
Scourged by his dungeon; but, sustain'd and soothed
By an unfaltering trust, approach thy grave,
Like one who wraps the drapery of his couch
About him, and lies down to pleasant dreams.
Gwendolyn
good for you!
i should do something similar. I would not want my ex or even my brother deciding what happens to me if i cant look after myself. The problem i have is i dont have anybody local that i could trust with my gender stuff. Maybe if i can hold on until my daughter is of age, i can come out to her, and see if she would do it.
Will, POA, HCS, LW, HIPPA
RAMI
Everyone, especially those with alternate life styles, people estranged from their families, or with no family, need at least the following 5 documents:
Last Will and Testament, Power of Attorney, A Health Care Power of Attorney/Health Care Surrogate, Living Will, and a HIPPA release.
Without them, you are subject to the statutory laws of your State and federal law when dealing with medical records and information.
The important thing is to designate as you desiganted individual someone who will carryout your wishes.
If you are in a full time relationship, with someone you are not married to, eg. a Gay couple in states that do not have gay marriage or otherwise have laws of some kind recognizing the relationship, your partner is in jeopardy of losing any rights regarding your health or your property.
If you own anything like stocks, bank accounts, and real property make sure they are titled in a proper manner.
If you don't, the people you least want to be responsible for you might be the only ones with a legal right.
RAMI
RAMI