As many of you might have realised, I have a questionable love of Limericks, so I thought with the festive season just around the corner, a Christmas Limerickathon might turn out to be quite entertaining.
I shall start the ball rolling with this one.
Our Reverend Mother Superior
Wears transparent scanties
And open-crotch panties,
With tinsel around her posterior.
Come on all you BC/TS-ers, let's see what you can do. (Please try to get the "Limerick form" and scansion right.)
Gabi
Comments
Go Rest Ye Merry Gentlewomen -
God rest ye merry gentlewomen, let nothing you dismay
to steer you from your surgeries upon a christmas day!
With christ as your saviour, the birth defect will lopped away!
Oooh, tidings of comfort(Pads) and joy(Dilation), comfort(Pads) and joy!(Dilation)
Oooh tidings of commmmfffooort(Pads) and joy!(Dilation)
Sephrena
Toy Story
A teddy bear up at the Pole,
told his seamstress elf of his sad soul.
So she gave him a chop
and more stuffing up top,
and then Teddi Bear knew she was whole.
Okay Here U Go
“Yule costume party,†they’d said. “Come hither.â€
Stopping at the door I started to dither.
A size 18 fairy,
Legs - so recently hairy.
"Will I flourish tonight . . . or wither?"
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Tinsel town?
The Christmas fairy on the Christmas tree,
Buttocks clenched, she looked so twee.
Legs were crossed against the spruce
Until she tired and she got goosed,
Next year she'll be there with her own papoose.
Angharad
Angharad
Holidaze
She passed up a pitcher of nog
For a much stronger bucket of grog
She drank until drunk
As a three-legged skunk
And lost her male self in a fog
- Terry
Safe Sex
She put on a holiday dress
And partied with men more or less
With bedroom gymnastics
But no prophylactics
She couldn't get pregnant I guess
- Terry
Limericks
ALISON
A young TG from Khartoum,
Took the Xmas fairy up to her room,
They argued all night,
As to who had the right as to who would do who,
And with what and to whom!!
ALISON
Got bored at work...
Yes, I know these are terrible. Tough.
There was an old man from Up North
Who had to take presents to Borth
When he got there
He forgot little Claire
That silly old man from Up North
There was an old toymaker from Borth
Who thought he'd take presents up North
His van was a mess
He broke down by Loch Ness
And he never did get to the Forth
(OK, so Loch Ness is further North than the Forth - so what? He took the scenic route!)
Just thought of a sneaky variation on the first one - that's even more terrible than the two above.
There was an old man from Up North
Who had to take presents to Borth
Upon arriving there
He forgot Tim was now Claire
So she goaded him backwards and forth.
OK, I think I've tortured you enough - I'll stand back and leave it to the experts :)
--Ben
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Snowy Lament
There once was a frost-bitten caribou
who dreamed about moving to Malibu,
where he'd sip a martini
and wear a bikini
with high-heeled shoes trimmed out in marabou.