"The time has come the walrus said" - OK it was the doctor who told me.

Looks like the expiration date on the bottom of my left foot is becoming visible.

I am diagnosed with kidney failure- singular.

The "fun" part of being a mutant is missing parts- and not knowing about it until you are getting in bad shape. I found I was born without a kidney and other internals are not connected where they should have been, or a few internal skeletal structure defects.

My parents were both exposed to the radiation released from the Hanford WA. Nuclear facility (Both parents and my grandmother died from cancer and were in the exposure area). Added to this is is believed that my mother was given DES to prevent her from aborting my fetus. Her medical records are long gone, but upon much research over a number of years, this appears very likely. She had aborted twins previously.

As screwed up as this sack of meat and water I inhabit is, I am thankful she was not given Thalidomide.

For those who are wondering, I have never been a drinker, smoker of anything, nor a taker of any drugs other than what my doctor has prescribed- and not even all of those because of side effects. (More "fun" from my mutations).

No- They have no idea how long I will be corporeal , but all arrangements are made. My headstone is in place (Seeing them install that can really hit you between the eyes!) . I have come to grips with my demise, and am not afraid of my death. I do hope I will see the love of my life Jillian ( It's been many years now, and I still miss you every day); and my family, friends, and pets again when the time arrives. My only hope is I can outlive my pets so they don't have to be re-homed.

Now for those of you who say "Well you can get a transplant or dialysis". No. I refuse to take a healthy kidney from a younger person who still has a full life to live. I am old enough to be the great grandparent of some of you. As for dialysis, also No. All whom I have known in kidney failure that are on dialysis finally say; " Enough is enough" and stop.

I have made my Peace with the Universe. I am lucky to live in one of the states where assisted death is legal. So I have that option if the pain becomes too great. Meantime, I will continue to go day to day.

If any of you who read this had parents in Eastern Washington State during WW2, especially the Omak/Okanogan area- they were exposed to radiation released by Hanford Nuclear Facility in a government experiment to "See where it would go and what it would do". (and possibly Idaho and Eastern Oregon). If you did have family in those areas during WW2, have them get screened for cancer and you need to have a thorough physical exam also.

(Yes, the U.S. Government used it's unsuspecting citizens as guinea pigs in WW2, just like Germany, Japan, Russia, and other nations. It is part of the "Revisionist History" that has been swept under the carpet.)

I am posting this because few folks know of the "Revisionist History" , and it is important you are aware of the effects of radiation of the human body.

Please- no "pity" posts. I have pretty much lived my life with few real regrets.

Meanwhile, I shall continue to be a PITA to those who deserve it.