The Lynx (me)

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(caution tag just because...)

Alright, so this is my 4th blog post in as many days. Out of character much? Maaaybe.

This account has been active a little over 7 years and all that time has seen 5 blogs by yours truly, including this one. No other writing credits and only the occasional comment to say I've ever existed here at BCTS. Why then am I suddenly chatty? Simply put, why not?

Once upon a time I was a rather gregarious and outgoing person, happy with life and my decision to transition. Then there were the physical assaults. The verbal, mental, and emotional abuses. The incidental death threat by my brother during the holidays. Drama, drama, drama, blah-bl-blah. Deep, dark depression inside, "hope my mask looks alright" on the outside. Then tragedy. Or more so, I suppose.

Recently someone very close to me died. Then I almost died... A few times. Again. Hard to think straight when depression's shaking ya like a chew toy. Yup, kinda think some of you might know what I mean. Then it happened... My grief passed.

When I overcame my grief for them something funny happened - I realized I'd been grieving myself as well. I'd already climbed in the hole and pulled the dirt in after. It was just taking awhile for the services to catch up.

Here's the thing - My mom accepted me just as I am before she passed. We both knew I had been her daughter all along, even if it took a long time for it to sink in. It's been 6 months and I can still feel that last hug....

This quote might be familiar to some of you, "Get busy living, or get busy dying." And I'm not dead yet ffs, so guess that just leaves the other, hmm?

My name is Jenna Copeland, sometimes called Lynx or Mystlynx. (Yes, the Lynx is a fairly shy and elusive creature at times) Nice ta meet you all.

PS, I just quit smoking, part of that "get living" bit yanno, so am likely more than a little manic pfft.

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