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My wife has been away for three weeks. This has allowed Liz to come out to play. Crossdressing seems to have lost it's zest. And of course, passing was never going to be possible for a girl who was a linebacker in high school, and still looks the part, if somewhat heavier.
Crossdressing and haunting BCTS has been taking too much of my time. I did little else for the last three weeks! I guess I need to spend more time paying attention to my wife and farm, and to just get on with life!
I just deleted all my saved stories from BCTS and elsewhere, and it's time to purge my clothes and shoes, which are the hardest.
I'll miss you all. Be good to each other, but don't be afraid to tell hard truths.
Elizabeth Anne Reynolds (Liz)
Comments
May your path be blessed
Each of us has a path, and none of them are the same. None of us has the right to comment or judge another.
Your posts
have given me the most comfort of any in my time here.
Liz
Stay
Stay logged in if for nothing other than to read stories. This fat little Jewish kid never passed and did not have clothes BUT I like to read.
GOOD LUCK to you and as a family member at BCTS you can always come home to open arms
HUGS for now and kisses when you come back
One good tning about purging...
...is you will have to go shopping soon. :-)
Never heard about someone who had purged and had not restocked their stash. Sometimes it takes some time... Sometimes life prevents us...
Another thing is that for our loved ones we can sometimes sacrifice part of ourselves. But it leads to frustration and tension in relationships far too often. And here comes BCTS, or in my case it was Storysite (as it was more than 10 years ago...). It allowed me keep my frustrations to minimum.
Moderation vs. Binge
Dearest Liz,
Been there, done that! My sympathy for you.
When the boundaries of acceptability are extended to the entry/exit doors (though not to the outside world,) there is, nonetheless, a tendency to overindulge. But the outside world seems not ready for you to drive your tractor or tend your livestock in skirt, heels and wig. So the doors define the boundary when you satisfy the urges. Sudden freedom to satisfy those urges within that boundary is a difficult temptation to resist and, consequently, disruptive to daily responsibilities.
The key is to find satisfaction in moderation. Sometimes, (in)appropriate undergarments, for instance, may relieve the stress and satisfy the urges without interfering with daily life during the intermezzos between opportunities for greater freedom. Avoiding the debilitating binge is more easily said than done. :(
Sadly, periodic purging is the norm for CD's. I've not heard of a "cure," and the cycle repeats. Hopefully, the "period" is measured in decades rather than months. And in a decade, it is probably time to refresh one's closet, anyway. Styles change.
Until we meet again, may the wind be at your back and peace be in your soul.
Hugs,
Sara
Sara
Between the wrinkles, the orthopedic shoes, and nine decades of gravity, it is really hard to be alluring. My icon, you ask? It is the last picture I allowed to escape the camera ... back before most BC authors were born.
And you think it that easy?
I'm going to quit because the feelings are no longer there. So one purges the last of the incriminating evidence and goes "cold turkey". What can I say? Lots of luck with that one. I wish you well. May you find peace in your soul after so many years.
Un huh, right. Well to tell the truth it has happened. I wish I had a chance to speak to you first to give some sisterly advice. First I would have advised you talk to a counselor. Then I would have told you to put all your past in a lockable safe in the barn or shed drop a ratty ol tarp over it so it would be inconspicuous. Then call me back in a year and tell me how you have been.You do know beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I have found true beauty is always inside and makes it to the outside if one is truly beautiful.
Hugs Liz, I truly pray you find that peace inside you which you seek.
always,
Barb
Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl
I Hope...
I hope that you've managed to keep your stories somewhere. It's so terrible for one's creative work to be destroyed; almost like destroying your child.
As for your vestments, try boxing them instead of disposing of them. You don't really want to give up what made you happy and what made you, you.
This brought to mind a story written 19 or 20 years ago, by Malinov. (Erin should remember him.) Burning Letters
-- Daphne Xu
As I said earlier, why cling to the...
...old out of fashion things? It is just the reason to go shopping soon!
It is quite possible that purging is a mechanism developed by the evolution of the crossdresser to force us to go shopping for the new fun and fashionable clothes every so often.
;-)