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because some unthinking fool has given them grief has made me very angry! I've spent years here at Top Shelf and, while not every writer is one I read, their work is nontheless important to them and their fans. Writing is a way to deal with the anxiety and even pain that comes with being Transgender and being able to get those anxieties out in writing helps each and every writer to deal with those pains and anxieties.
It also provides entertainment for those who either can't write, or think they can't. Do any of you suppose that Erin has virtually ruined her financial life by keeping this site open and going strong for a lark? If you do, then you are more of a fool than you know. Erin and her friends, co-workers and volunteers have done what they've done for the love of what they do for others and to provide a VITAL service for those of us too timid or unable to "come out!"
Some of the ones who read and write here can only express themselves here at Top Shelf. For them it's the only way they can acknowlege who they really feel themselves to be, and some malcontents choose to deny the others of that respite from what might very well be a grim, half existance, relieved only by writing, reading, or blogging here? For some, who have had the courage to write and publish, the small amount of income might be the difference between them eating and paying the bills, or starving and being homeless and some of you would deny them this?
How much better would this world be if everyone just followed the Golden Rule? No, I don't mean the one about who has the gold, makes the rules. No, I mean the one that says: 'TREAT OTHERS AS YOU WOULD BE TREATED. IF YOU HAVE NOTHING NICE TO SAY, SAY NOTHING! I'm gonna ignore that rule this one time!
This is a PRIVATELY OWNED SITE, AND ERIN IS THE OWNER. If you don't like how she does things, then maybe YOU should leave instead of driving others away with unkind comments and insults. It's NOT a public forum for you to spew hate and say whatever you like! Erin allows a great deal of latitude here, but when it gets too bad, she HAS to step in and remove hateful or harmful comments and stories. That's her RIGHT as the OWNER of the site!
So to everyone who thinks they can do anything they want or say whatever they want, regardless of who it might hurt, I'll say this.
HOW DARE YOU TRY TO RUIN THIS VALUABLE RESOURCE FOR THE REST OF US? If you don't like it here, then maybe YOU should leave instead of driving others away with your ill thought out comments that harm others!
I've been a member here for over 12 years and I'll be DAMNED if I'll see this shit happening without me speaking out against it! SO this is me speaking out! IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT HERE, IF YOU DON'T LIKE A STORY OR AN AUTHOR, DON'T FRIGGING READ IT!!! But don't spoil a good thing for the rest of us!
Now I've had my say and I'm sure that I'm gonna get flamed by the rabble rousers who feel THEY have the right to spew their hatred on others. Well, go ahead. I've remained silent on this whole thing for far too long. Well, I'm a big girl and I can handle any of the crap you wanna try to pile on me. Hell, even Erin might delete this comment, but I had to get this out of me before I lose it completely and REALLY cut loose! If you gotta, Erin... then delete it. You won't hurt my feelings.
A pissed off Catherine Linda Michel said all of that!
Comments
Another form of bulling
I'm not transgender and I have no problems with anyone who is. Life in general is tough and unfair: so I see no point in making it any harder on anyone. But unfortunately the internet has made it easier for bullies. I personally see no difference in physical bullying and cyber bullying. Even our Presidential race or as some called it the presidential demolition derby. Was nothing short of a constant tirade of bullying from both major candidates. One of the main reasons I voted for McMullin. Heaven knows what we have let ourselves in for with the moron that has won!
As a Mom I find it a daily struggle as things, seem to be getting worse at schools and in general. I try and encourage my kids the best way to change the world is start with yourself. It's what my Mom and Dad taught me and I have to say it works. Or at least has worked with me up to now. In essence it means that I have my own morality and belief system, whether religious or otherwise. My friends are of a similar persuasion I do tolerate up to a point those outside that zone. But as soon as they invade that comfort area I ignore them I will not have that in my life. In other words as soon as people show disrespect they are history. Admittedly sometimes that is easier said than done. However, when said parties realize they have no effect on me they grow bored and leave me alone. For myself and my family that has always worked. Like I tell my kids ignoring bullies is not running away from them, it merely reduces how effect they are.
Cheryl X
I posted
I posted along these lines as well. Maybe Catherine will be heard. I was apparently ignored but by a handful of people. I guess they only read it because my name was there and they are my friends. Catherine being one of them*hugs for Catherine*
quidquid sum ego, et omnia mea semper; Ego me.
alecia Snowfall
agree
may I say I whole heartedly agree. I read for pleasure, not to critique the writing of others. if you don't like it no need to get nasty about it.
Amen
Amen , be nice don't make others suffer because you are angry. This is a fun place to read stories and interact with like minded people HUGS to my BCTS family
criticism
what too many people do not realize is there is a difference between criticism and constructive criticism. criticism is to cut people down just to cut them down. while constructive criticism is to help others improve by pointing out mistakes in a kind and loving way. just like there is a difference between a person using a knife to cut others and a surgeon using a scalpel to try to heal.
Guest Account
What has bothered me lately is the posts using the Guest Reader account. It appears there is at least one person using it to snipe at writers and other readers. I have said several times that this person needed to register for a regular account, as have others. We have been ignored and the sniping continues. I don't know if there is a way to add more accountability to the Guest Reader account, so with great regret I suggest the Guest Reader account be disabled, at least in the short term.
I have been thinking this for several years but said nothing as doing so is throwing the baby out with the bath water. The GR access has allowed the occasional visiter to comment on what they have read. However the situation is getting out of hand IMHO, and I think it is time to take action.
"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin
I don't know if it's possible
I don't know if it's possible, but one 'fix' would be to require an email address, and confirmation before sending. This is what StoriesOnLine does for 'anonymous' replies. To the end user, it's still a 'Guest Reader', but they can backtrack the person if necessary.
Another, probably impossible to do, would be to allow 'registrations' for a guest reader account.
The last is simply to do as Karen suggested. Disable it, at least for a while. I know I won't respond to anything posted by Guest Reader anymore.
I'll get a life when it's proven and substantiated to be better than what I'm currently experiencing.
Guest Readers
There's been ten or twelve comments by Guest Reader in the last week, only one was a problem. It was a duplicate. The guest reader account averages fewer flagged and removed comments than a lot of logged in users do. :)
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.
100% right
Catherine has said it well. I cast another vote of agreement.
I posted a note on this subject, on my blog. I was a little hurt when it was removed from the home page. But on reflection, this is a small price to pay to keep this site "friendly".
Demoted blogs
A lot of blogs get demoted off the front page not for what the blogger said but for the virulence of what some of the commenters said. If I judge that the direction of a thread is not good for the site, I will often demote the whole blog rather than remove comments that are not quite violations of the rules.
Hugs,
Erin
= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.