Down but not out - Part 10

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“Cat got your tongue?” asked Serena.

“Not really. I was just thinking back to how I got here. To be honest, I’m not sure if I can properly accept all this kindness and stuff.”

“You must have gotten used to fending for yourself while on the road? My brother told me about what had happened to you.”

“He only knew what was needed for the trial but that is all in the past,” I retorted.

Before she could answer, I asked,
“Your brother… if you don’t mind me saying, is as white as me.”

To my eternal relief, she laughed.

“I’m often asked that question. We both have the same father but he is more than ten years older than me. His mother died and a few years later, his father met my mother when he was working in Kerala. That’s in southern India where they were married and came to this country where I was born. They moved back to India after my little problem on the game show. They now run a Hotel there.”

"That wasn't your fault, was it? You weren't to blame if your co-host couldn't keep his trousers zipped up."

She smiled back at me.
“Guilt by association I’m afraid. Once I was tarred with his brush, my name was dirt. That’s what you get for blowing the whistle on him I guess.”

“That’s not right.”

“True but at least I had a career to fall back on. Many ‘Z’ list celebs are all in on the celeb career. If it goes wrong, then they are up shit creek without a paddle. I’ve seen far too many nearly make it but end up much like you in the gutter. Their delusions of grandeur destroyed mostly by the press of a few keys on some hacks computer. They tried hard to make me the person responsible for him having a series of affairs. One even went to print blaming me for enticing him to have an affair.”

"I remember that. You sued the paper, didn’t you?”

She grinned back at me.
“And I won big time. The damages from that case paid for what you see here.”

“Sounds like a good investment what with property prices these days.”

“Possibly. That all depends. If I can’t make this place work then I’ll have to sell up.”

“I hope not. From what I’ve seen so far, this would be a nice place as a home.”

“Thanks for that. It is my home as well as my place of work.”
Before I could respond, she said,

“Come on, let me give you the tour.”


[seven weeks later]

“Come on Craig, one more length,” shouted Serena.

I was in the swimming pool. I’d just completed one mile of a swim. One length of front crawl using only my left arm followed by one length of breaststroke. Rinse and repeat until my slave driver allowed me out of the pool.

The last length was horrible. My slave driver had been increasingly brutal with the tasks she’d set me in the last week. As my shoulder healed, she’d increased the work I’d been doing. Not only did she concentrate on my shoulder, but she also made sure that my whole body had a workout. Plenty of exercises and good food had meant that I was probably fitter than I'd ever been.

I duly completed the extra length and climbed out of the pool.

“I think that you are done.”

I nodded my head.
"I hope so. I've never swum that far before."

“I did say that I’d test you to new limits.”

“You did and my whole body aches as a result.”

“Go and get showered. There is something I want to talk to you about over dinner.”

That sounded decidedly ominous. As I showered, I had visions of me being out on the roads and tracks of England once more. I had to admit to myself that the prospect of being homeless again was not that attractive. I wondered if I'd gone soft in the time that I'd been here but if I was being honest with myself, the need for me to be on the road had gone away with the jailing of my former wife. I'd not completely accepted that I didn't need to be homeless any longer. It was only being relatively settled here for these past weeks that those thoughts had started to rumble around my mind.


Freshly showered and shaved, I wandered downstairs. There was something nice cooking so I headed into the kitchen. Serena was busy chopping veggies. She looked up and smiled at me as I entered the room.

“Can you open the wine?” she said pointing at a bottle that was sitting on the counter near the fridge.
“I’ll just put these onto steam. Everything will be ready in about 15 minutes.”

“It smells good. What is it?”

“I’m roasting the leg of lamb that we bought at the farmers market last Sunday.”

I nodded my appreciation as I walked over to where the wine was sitting on the counter.

The label told me that it was an expensive bottle. I’d not seen it when we’d done the shopping in recent weeks. Whatever it was that Serena wanted to talk about, it must be important. The only thing I could imagine that it would be about would be when I’d be leaving.

I had to admit to myself that I’d been thinking about this very thing in the past week. As my shoulder healed, I had to think about what I’d do next. Without a proper home, the only real alternative was to go back on the road. I'd heard nothing about the status of my former home in Shropshire. One message had said that it was being confiscated and another one was that as it had been my home then it was mine. I hadn't pressed the matter simply because there was nothing there for me any longer. If I never saw the place again, it would be far too soon.

I opened the bottle of wine and poured her a glass. I held back on pouring myself one. I’d managed all the time I was on the road not to get drunk like all the others and I’d refrained from drinking any alcohol since I came here. If I was going to have a drink then it would be with the food and not before.

I put Serena’s glass of wine down close to where she was standing. All her attention was on making the gravy. She looked over and smiled. Then the smile disappeared.

“Still dry then?”

“Maybe. I might have one with the meal.”

I saw her sigh. I knew what that meant.

“Don’t worry, I’ll soon be out of your hair.”

Serena didn’t respond but I saw her jaw tighten. I wondered if I had got this all wrong after all?


“That Lamb was excellent,” I said as I cleared away the plates.

“Thanks for the compliment but please stop that and sit down. We need to talk.”

I sat down and looked at her right in the eyes. She hesitated for a second so I said,

“I’ll be leaving tomorrow morning if that’s ok with you. I don’t want to put you out any longer than necessary.”

What I said clearly surprised her.
“That’s not what I wanted to talk to you about.”

I had no idea what it was if it wasn’t about me leaving.

“Ok, then why don’t you tell me what it is?”

“Have you been watching the news?”

I shook my head.
“Nah. I gave up on that when I went on the road. Why? What’s the problem?”

“There is a virus spreading around the world. It seemed to originate in China but large parts of Northern Italy has been in a state of lockdown for a couple of weeks and all the rumours point to the whole of the UK following suit very soon. By soon, I mean a few days or at most a week.”

"That would be good. With everyone staying at home it would mean fewer people on the footpaths."

Serena shook her head.
“What the experts are saying is that travel is the major source of how it has been spread from China to just about everywhere. Lockdown means stay at home and don’t go anywhere unless it is really important.”

“Oh! I had no idea.”

“I don’t want you to leave. It seems that I’m going to have to put my grand opening on hold until this is all over. I can’t very well open and close right away. That’s plain silly.”

“How long? When do you think that it will be ok again?”

Serena shook her head.
“I don’t know but it is not going to be a few weeks. My gut feeling is about a year.”

“That’s a bummer. Can you manage financially?”

“I’m going to have to, aren’t I? At least I don’t have any staff to pay. If you hadn’t come here when you did, I might have had a few people on the books.”

I was stuck for words.

“I’d like you to stay here with me for the duration. All the time you have been here, you haven’t come on to me so I’ve begun to trust you.”

Her words stuck a dagger right through my heart. With every day I’d been here it had been harder and harder not to tell her that I fancied her something rotten. Before I knew it, I’d reacted in a way that made it clear that I wanted more from our relationship,

“Oh!” she remarked.

"Sorry, Serena. I didn't mean to react like that. Virus or no virus, I'll leave in the morning."

“No, you bloody well won’t.”

“What? What do you mean?”

“These past seven weeks have been hard on me as well.”

"Hard how? You have been slave-driving me pretty, hard haven't you?"

“I have but you took whatever I threw at you with almost zero complaints.”

I managed a smile.

“If I stayed and there is a lockdown, what would we do all day?”

Serena sat back and grinned at me. Something inside me said that I would not like what she was going to say.

“This place will need maintaining and everything. We could do it together… as a team. Work in the mornings and then use the pool or gym or outside in the afternoon. With spring and summer ahead, using the outside facilities will be good. Besides, I need them tested out before I have paying guests.”

I didn’t know what to say. I could not decide if she was saying that she liked me in a more than just friends way or not.

Then she grinned at me again.

“I wondered if you’d like to spend the time… of the lockdown living as a woman. As there would only be the two of us then…?”

“You’d have a lot of fun at my expense?”

She shook her head.
“That is not what I meant at all. I’d help you in any way I could. If I take the piss of you, you have my permission to throw me fully clothed into the pool.”

“There is one little problem. That is the subject of clothes and shoes and everything?”

Serena nodded her head.
“Then I’d better hit the supermarket then, hadn’t I? That would be a start.”

“We’d better hit the supermarket… That’s if I say yes that is.”

“Haven’t you already decided?”

“I have not. I’ll need to think this through,” I said defiantly.

Serena smiled back at me.
“Don’t take too long about it. Why don’t you watch the news on TV? That might help you make up your mind?”

She was right. I needed to see what was happening in the world and more importantly, closer to home.


That evening, I watched the news with disbelief. This virus was spreading everywhere and it seemed that governments were powerless to stop it. Even the total lockdown in Northern Italy was not stopping the spread.

I switched off the TV when I could take no more.

I sat silently for a few minutes as I tried to collect my thoughts. It seemed that Serena’s offer was the best I could hope for given the spread of the Pandemic.

It was then that I heard Serena talking. She was in what would become the residents dining room when and if the place opened up.

From the one-sided nature of the conversation, I guessed that she was talking on the phone to someone. That in itself was unusual. I couldn't remember the last time I'd heard her on the phone this late at night.

As I was not in the habit of listening in on other people’s calls, headed up to bed.


There was just far too much on my mind to sleep very well. Every time I began to think about what Serena had proposed, I kept thinking of Yasmin and everything that had happened with her before the trial and… and afterwards.

The images that came into my mind of me being trapped into doing something against my will. All sorts of what if’s rattled through my mind but nothing settled.

The first birds were already announcing the arrival of a new day before I finally stopped thinking of my impending doom and gloom and fell asleep.

My mind was none the clearer when I got up. I was much slower than normal but I put that down to lack of sleep more than anything else. It wasn’t until I wandered downstairs and found the kitchen strangely silent that I looked at the clock.

I was surprised to see that it was almost 09:00 and there was no sign of Serena. I wandered over to the Coffee Maker and gave it a feel. It was still warm. Then I saw a slip of paper under the mug that I used for Coffee.

“Craig,
I’ve gone grocery shopping. There were stories of people clearing the shelves of things like loo rolls and tinned tomatoes. We don’t need any of them but I’m going to see what I can get. I should be back by lunchtime.
Serena

I made myself some coffee and toast for Breakfast, After that... then what? I was at something of a loose end. Every day until today, Serena had been putting me through her version of hell to get my shoulder and the rest of my body into some sort of physical shape. Life on the road had taken its toll on me. Sure, I could walk miles every day while I was on the road but the rest of me had gotten rather soft. I knew that from my stints at the chicken farm. The first few days were absolute agony but the exercise had started to make me all-around fitter by the time I came to leave.

Now, I was as fit as I’d ever been but I had nothing to do.

As I drank my second cup of coffee, I began to think once more about her offer and all it entailed. That depressed me no end so I began to think about the place that Serena was trying to create and all it entailed.

There was no doubting her talents as a physiotherapist and psychologist. She’d done wonders for me. That was only part of the resources that this place would need.

I cleared the things away and went exploring. I soon found the staff changing rooms. There, all hanging up like the kit that a sports team might wear for the game ahead was the uniforms for the domestic staff. Every one of them was for a woman. That sort of made sense.

I was about to take one down to look at in more detail when a voice from behind me said,

“The next one along would fit you… If you want to try it on that is?”

I almost jumped right out of my skin. I turned around to see Serena grinning back at me.

She was still wearing her coat which said loud and clear that she'd just returned from the shopping trip.

“Serena! I didn’t hear you return?”

“I did call out. I wanted some help with unloading the car. When I got no reply, I came looking for you. For a moment, I thought that you had done a runner but then I saw the door to this part of the house was open.”

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.”

“You aren’t prying. Far from it.”

Serena sighed.
“I guess I’d better bring the shopping in on my own then?”

“Eh?”

“While you get changed…?”

I knew that I’d walked right into that one.

“No. I’ll help you. I can’t stand here all day.”

Serena muttered something under her breath that I couldn’t understand so I ignored it.


Serena must have bought out the whole store if the volume of the shopping was anything to go by.
"No toilet rolls then?" I said half-joking.

"There were only bare shelves besides, we have several hundred in the storeroom."

“But what is all this stuff?”

“If the news reports are true and we go into lockdown, it won’t be for a few days. My guestimate is July at the earliest. Everything here is for us to have some fun in the kitchen.”

I didn’t believe a word that she’d said. Somehow, I had become even more suspicious of her good intentions.

“Sorry Serena, I just don’t believe you. I watched some TV this morning. They were saying just a few weeks at most.”

“Was that Sky News by any chance?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“That channel is full of shit if you don’t mind me saying so. Murdoch controls it just like Fox News over in the USA. President Trump is downplaying the ‘China Virus’ as he puts it. They are mouthpieces of the US right.”

The way she said it made me think.
“I’ve been out of things remember. I think that yesterday was the first time that I’ve watched any TV since I’ve been here and for months before that if I’m being honest.”

Serena smiled at me.
“That’s ok. I’ll let you make up your own mind but my opinion is that this thing is going to get a lot, lot worse before it gets any better. If the stripped bare shelves in the supermarkets are anything to go by, then I’m not alone in that thought.”

I felt a bit foolish. I wasn’t like this before… Before… That was so long ago now. But back then I’d look for more than one news source.

“I’m sorry for doubting you. I’ll certainly look at some other news channels but they made it seem so convincing. They said that it was like a mild dose of the flu and not very dangerous at all.”

"Please make your own mind up about the virus. From the information I have so far, I think that it will affect everyone on the planet and that includes us does it not?"

“If you put it like that then yes, it does.”

Serena smiled at me. This was not her normal smile. I’d seen that many times in the past weeks but this was something special. I decided to change the subject a little bit.

“If we do go into lockdown what had you planned for me then? You know, what is my sentence and do I get time off for good behaviour?”

Serena looked at me for a second and then burst out laughing.

“That’s a good question. I spent a lot of time last night thinking about me, you and this place. What became clear to me was that I was in no way ready to open for business before you came. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I’d done all the hard stuff but the icing on the cake was missing. One of the ideas I had was that we could work together on them while you learned the ropes… as manager of this place.”

It took me a second or so to digest what she’d said.

“Me? Manager of this place? Are you mad?”

Serena smiled back at me again.

“Not in the slightest. I’ve gotten to know you over these past weeks. You are an intelligent person who should not be homeless and destitute. Your dedication to the tasks I set you proved that you can stick at a task through thick and thin.”

“Bollocks!”

Serena laughed and shook her head.

“Not ‘bollocks’ but the truth and you know what your problem is?”

She didn’t wait for me to answer but gave me one anyway.

“Your problem buster is that you are afraid of your own shadow. So, you got hurt by your ex but she’s behind bars now but you can’t put that ‘I’ve been hard done by’ attitude behind you and as a result, you push anyone who wants to help you away. If you keep on doing that then you will be alone forever and you will be a bitter old man.”

Serena had unloaded both barrels and then some at me. They’d hit me right in the stomach, the heart and everywhere else that mattered.

The problem was… she was perfectly right.

The time for running and self-pity was over. Now I had to move forward and become the person that I had dreamed about becoming for decades.

[to be continued]

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Comments

Hurt by his ex?

That's like saying he was scratched by the nuke that impacted next to him. Her statement just proves that she is totally clueless about what happened to him; and like the two copper ladies she has made plans for his life without considering or consulting him. D*MN Dogooders, always believe they know better what is best for a person than the person themselves.

It's time to run like hell, never mind the lockdown! Relocate to a location he hasn't been previously. If he gets his house back, sell it immediatly and place the money in a secure location only he can access. Like a secure account that he can draw on anywhere he decides to go.


"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin

She's Got Him Right

joannebarbarella's picture

He has to put the injury that his ex-wife inflicted on him behind him and make a new life. So far he has run a mile every time someone has tried to help him. It's time to grasp the opportunity and the pandemic lockdowns that are looming give him a reason to do that.

Serena has pulled him through his physical injury and is offering him a place to live. She is also smart and knows what supposed "News" outfits like Sky are about. They are just propaganda channels projecting right-wing views that coincide with the aims of their owner.

We've got an Australian equivalent which we call Sky No-News.

moving forward

can be really hard, but truly worth it.

DogSig.png

Acceptance?

Robertlouis's picture

Is Craig showing a degree of acceptance for the first time? Serena hasn’t really put him under any pressure. She’s shown understanding and compassion from the outset as well as using him as a Guinea pig to some extent, but their relationship has developed into mutual respect and affection.

There’s a good base which the coincidental circumstances of the lockdown will allow both parties to test without too much stress. It could be ideal if Craig is prepared to let it be so.

☠️

Fallout Shelter

BarbieLee's picture

Remember those? Build one, plan on living isolated in it for a year or more as the earth cleansed itself from mankind's madness. Covid was no different. Most of us wore those stupid masks for a month and then quit. A box of them in the car for going to the VA or Amarillo or OKC where everyone was foolishly thinking the silly things protected them from covid because gov said so.
Our two actors-actresses are in for a long haul hoping to stay financially solvent as utilities and overhead never stops. There is safety in numbers and maybe staying with Serena will keep both of them sane. A problem shared is a problem halved.
Samantha, my pet, look in Serena's closet and see if she has a long black suede black riding skirt. I'm getting desperate. Been looking for a couple weeks now and still haven't found one in my size. I'd ask Bru but she'd probably come up with harem pants.
Hugs Sam
Barb
When life hands out lemons it's time to make lemonade.

Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl

Time to fish or cut bait

Dee Sylvan's picture

Serena laid things out pretty well. Time to 'woman up' and get on with life. I have enjoyed your story and it looks like it's coming to an end. Yes his ex-wife is a scumbag, we've all met someone like her. I wonder if he is going to get something financial from his former life (his house or business) that he can put towards his new life (with Serena?).

DeeDee

Where does the Fosse Way lead?

In the previous episode, I mentioned the old Roman Road, 'The Fosse Way'. It runs in a generally southwest direction from Lincoln.
Craig was looking at it and there are some as yet undocumented thoughts building in his mind. I'd love a bit of speculation about where he ends up and how this brings the solution to his puzzle a lot clearer.
Speculate away people but no peeking at my blog where the remainder of this story is posted.
Samantha
Now back to dinner. Some excellent cheese from here in Brittany to follow some duck Breast with a light mustard sauce, local asparagus and pollenta (never seen the attraction for that but hey-ho). Some delicious langostines made for a lovely starter.

If you are in Brittany

Shouldn't it be duck Brest?

As to being a Peeking Duck; I've already visited your blog so I'll keep silent.

With the risk of repeating myself: I like your story.

The Fosse Way

Maddy Bell's picture

is a sad road that goes from a busy dual carriageway to little more than a footpath and everywhere between. The only sizeable places it goes through are Leicester, Cirencester and Bath before reaching Exeter. As a route from a to b it works but its relentless in its tedium as any straight road will be, thats almost 230 miles of no bends as only the Romans could!

No idea what Craig might find of interest along that route having ridden or driven pretty much the entirety of it.


image7.1.jpg    

Madeline Anafrid Bell

On the menu

A plate of wait and see. All will be revealed including a ditch full of nettles.
Samantha

Other then the variations

In the road, you've pretty much described the Interstate Highway system here in the US. 230 miles is barely getting the car warmed up. There are places that stretch 600 miles or more, straight driving all the way.

When one of our crane operators was coming to visit one of our guys in Dallas, I mentioned the idea of them heading up my way for a visit. When he asked how far it was, I said it was 300, 350 miles. His reaction was "Blimey! I've only got two weeks!" The other American and I laughed. "You can do the round trip in one day, leaving plenty of time to look around, eat, etc. Hit I-35 and head north, 70mph, piece of cake!"

His mind was truely boggled!


"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin

Yes, Craig.

Podracer's picture

It's about time to damp down the doubt and paranoia, and start living again.

"Reach for the sun."

Broken trust hard to mend

Jamie Lee's picture

Craig's trust got shattered by his non-wife, who keep ruining anything he tried to do once she kicked him out.

Trust is fragile to begin with, and once it's betrayed, it can't be repaired by a snap of the fingers. It takes time for some to trust again, and for some, never again.

Serena believes she can snap her fingers and Craig will trust as he once did; she actually wants him to trust her but for a different reason. Her reason is to help manage her facility, making plans for him without finding out what he wants.

She also wants him to become the woman he once talked about, so she can be with his as a woman. This is another plan without finding out what he actually wants.

Craig needs left alone so he can get used to the idea that his non-ex can't harm him any more. So he can shift through his thoughts to determine what he really wants to do now. So whatever he does, it will be because he chose to do it and not because of a suggestion or plan from others.

Others have feelings too.

Little Shop of Horrors

"Be a Dentist" should be "Be a Physiotherapist."