Hidden Intent Part 3

I kept to the shadows as I walked to the station, feeling the strangeness of the breasts with the tightness of the bra. I had the back-pack on and the shoulder bag on my shoulder and did start to feel as if I was walking into a new future.

The only problem would be that I had no identity now and all my schooling had been for nothing. I had no idea of what I would do but, as I was now a murderer, I had better not muck it up. When I got to the station I had my breakfast while waiting for the early train. I started to relax as we pulled away from the station. Everyone that I had spoken to at the station had been kind and cheerful and the porter even carried my back-pack onto the train for me. We travelled for some time, lunch came around on a trolley, and we finally reached a warmer southern clime. It was early evening when I walked out of the station with absolutely no idea of where I should go.

A block away from the station I noticed a poster that was advertising a visiting circus, with it being one of those newer ones that had less animals and more human input. I asked waiter at a café I passed how to get to where it was playing and he gave me directions. It wasn’t all that far and I wandered around the site looking for somewhere I could hide for the night. I saw a penned off area with a pile of straw bales in it and thought that it would be a good place for me as it was far enough away from everything and they would only need more straw in the morning. I hid my bags in the bales and went to find the toilets before going back and burrowing in. I went off into a deep sleep almost immediately.

What woke me was a steady sound of a cat purring and I wondered if it was all a dream and when I opened my eyes I would be back in my bed with one of my cats cuddled up to me. I did feel the heat and weight of something alongside me and when I opened my eyes I was looking at the most beautiful cat I had ever seen. The only problem was that it was at least five times bigger than any cat I had ever seen outside a picture book. I stroked it and it purred louder so I spoke to it quietly and it opened its mouth so that it could give me a lick. When I saw its teeth I knew I was in trouble, especially if momma tiger was around as well.

I laid there and played with it, being as gentle as I could and hoping that it would reciprocate. It was the most amazing experience that a cat lover could have. It was doubled as the warmth on the other side of be turned out not to be my back-pack but another tiger cub. As the sun came up we became firm friends and I was in seventh heaven. The peace was shattered when a guy came to the fence and asked if I was crazy.

When I said that I didn’t think so, he passed me two big feeding bottles and said that I could at least feed them while I was there. I sat with the cubs and fed them both and when they had finished I looked up to see a small crowd watching. A tall lady told me to pick up my bags and slowly make my way to the gate and they would get me out. This I did and the lady escorted me to her caravan with a stop on the way so I could go to the toilet and wash my hands.

In her caravan she made me some breakfast and a hot drink and asked me how I came to be sleeping with her tiger cubs. I explained that I was on the run from an abusive father who had anally raped me a week before and that the pile of straw had been very inviting. She commented on how good I was with the cubs and I told her that I had a couple of cats at home before I left. She told me that the cubs had been rejected by their mother who had been sent away to a zoo. The circus was mostly human acts but they did have horses still. I told her that I had worked in a stable for a while and, after we had finished eating, she took me to where the horses were tethered. I, naturally, said hello to every one of them and gave them a few strokes as they nuzzled me. She said that I was a natural and asked if I had ever ridden bareback.

I told her that it was frowned on at the stables but that I had tried it a couple of times. She picked out one of the smallest horses and told me to lead it to the circus tent. On the way she banged on the door of a caravan and told the occupant, Jenny, to get over to the tent as soon as she could. When we got into the main tent I saw that there was the usual circus ring with a trapeze rig over it. We waited for Jenny while I spoke quietly to the horse. When Jenny arrived the lady told me that I was to get up on the horse and canter around the ring in an anti-clockwise direction. I took off the bridle rope and gave it to Jenny and pulled my body up onto the horse and we were of at a canter. I was sure the horse knew more than I did at this stage.

I held lightly onto the mane and, at about the third circuit, I heard a call to sit up with my arms out to the side. This I did and we did a few more circuits this way. It was really exciting and I was having a lot of fun. Then I heard her call for me to stand up. It took a couple more circuits before I was able to stand on the horse’s back and that was a totally new experience. We did a few more circuits and then I heard her ask me to do the swan pose. Now this was something I would never have expected to try but, by the second circuit, I was circulating on the back of the horse, on one leg with a bent forward pose, my arms out like wings and my trailing leg level with the ground. My years of gymnastics were paying off.

She called for me to stop and I came down to a sitting position before bringing the horse to a stop beside them. When I slid to the ground, Jenny rushed to me and gave me a big hug, telling me that I was fantastic. That was something I could take any day. She then took the horse back to its corral while the lady led me to a big caravan and knocked on the door. It opened with a jolly looking gentleman asking her what she wanted. She told him that he needed to talk to me and, when he sat us in his caravan, she told him of my antics of the day so far, from sleeping with the tiger cubs to doing almost a full act straight out of the box.

He asked me why I was there and I gave him the same story, I was escaping from an abusive father. He said that, to paraphrase, whatever happened before the circus had never happened and that I had a job if I wanted it. I agreed immediately and he told the lady to arrange my accommodation and to get the circus doctor to examine me. When I looked a bit worried at that he told me that I was not the first she-male he had seen and that it didn’t matter if I did my job. We went back and picked up my bags and I was billeted with Jenny in her caravan. I was quickly taken to another one where a kindly gentleman got me to strip completely while he examined me.

He gave me a shot of pain-killer in my butt and got me to hang on to the table side while he sewed my rectum up, saying that I was lucky that it wasn’t worse as I would have needed a hospital then. Otherwise, he declared me a very fit and healthy person. I had to sit a while as the stitches needed to be rested and we had a cuppa and chatted. I found out that my new employers were Stephano and Melissa Frangopoulos. The lady who had taken me under her wing was Evangeline, the eldest daughter. There was another daughter I had yet to meet, Elliana, who did the books and kept all the employee records. The circus had the horse act and the rest was trapeze, magic acts and various gymnastic acts with ropes and ribbons. Before I left him he gave me a box of pills that I was to take every day if I wanted to remain a girl.

I found Jenny waiting for me to set me to work. We had the horses to look after and groom and then there was the cubs to see to. Jenny was amazed how easily I bonded with the cubs and was even able to play with them. I knew that it would be a few more months and they would need to be sent to a zoo but the cat lover in me revelled in the experience. Evangeline watched us and told me that my first outing in the big top would be to lead the cubs around on leads and to interact with the customers. I was fitted out with an animal print leotard with a tutu and a pair of ballet flats. Jenny made me up and put my hair up with ribbons.

When the circus opened that evening I was standing by the entrance with a couple of boisterous cubs on leads. They loved the attention and I tried to get them into a position where photos could be taken of the more adventurous children in close proximity. At the finale of the show I joined the whole troupe in a grand parade. Everyone said that it was a hit and that I had a real future with them. That was the last night at that town and we upped sticks the next morning to go to the next site, to open a few days hence.

When we had set up I was almost part of the family and was now Tanya with her Tigers. Jenny had organised better breast forms and some casual clothes for me and I was also taking lessons from her and the horses to see if we could put on a dual riding act but it was very hard trying to get everything in sync.

Marianne G 2020