They say that it's better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.
Today I'd have to say that is very true. I have never been in love. Never been able to have relationships. My issues with my gender and my sexuality make me want to keep myself apart. To protect myself from exposing those hidden parts of my life. The couple people I have dated(very briefly)I went in knowing that it would not work out. I was right. The first person wanted to much, to soon. I was not ready. The second person wanted to meet Hitler. Enough said.
I am going out on a date this saturday with someone new. I meet this person online and she seems like a fellow geek. I know she likes Doctor who, so she does have good taste. But I know it will not work out. I have known my entire life that I would spend my life alone. I accept that. It's for the best.
It's better to have loved and lost, then to have never known love at all. I'd give anything just to know love. Even for only a little while.To have those memory's to hold me through the dark days.
Oh God. Some times I feel so alone.
Jessica Marie.
Comments
Jessica...
I'm not the best person to talk to about relationships, but here's some advice. Don't be so negative! Treat this date as a friendly meeting with a friend. Someone to talk to. Casual, relaxed, and if anything further happens, that's nice, but not worth stressing yourself about.
Relax and have fun.
Brute
Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue
Way too much pressure.
Being alone sucks and most of us are there or have been there. You're putting too much pressure on this date, just be friends, have fun, don't dump negative on it because you're kinda shooting yourself in the foot.
RL friends are important to have and sometimes it can lead to very nice and surprising things.
Bailey Summers
Do the words self-fulfilling prophecy mean anything to you?
If you go into any endeavor with such a negative attitude, you might as well simply stay home. You have doomed it to failure before you have even walked out the door.
You don't necessarily have to be totally positive in life, but a neutral attitude at the very least is a necessity. If you are convinced that you are going to fail, you will fail - if for no other reason than the fact that you expect to fail.
As to whether or not it is better to have loved and lost, well, I guess we'll never know whether that is true or not. The loneliness is still there, but add in the heartache of loss as well. That doesn't even begin to address what caused the loss and whatever problems may ensue from that as well.
It is better to simply have a positive attitude and dare to put yourself out there - to be approachable to others, and to take the chance that you might find someone special.
If we are going to quote platitudes, try these two on for size:
"Nothing ventured, nothing gained."
And one of my favorites:
"Who dares, wins."
Life is only worth living if you make the effort to truly live it, and that requires taking a chance. Taking a chance that there is in fact someone out there looking for you as well. You may never find that one person, but life is all about the journey - not the destination. In the end, we all get to the same place as death will eventually take us all. It is not how you die that makes a difference to the world - but how you live.
At the end of one of my favorite movies, The Last Samurai, the emperor asks Tom Cruise's character to tell him how the samurai lord died - Tom Cruise's response says it all - "Let me tell you how he lived."
Yes, I too want to find that special person that I can grow old with - I thought I had, but it was not to be. But more than that, when my time comes, I want to be able to look back on my life and have no regrets. I want to know that I truly dared.
Hopefully you will take this to heart - for if you don't, I will truly pity you.
Dallas
D. Eden
Dum Vivimus, Vivamus
Never Give Up
I, too, had resigned myself to spending my life a bachelor. However, at 35 years of age I met someone, and we will celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary this June. And she knew about the little girl within me before we started dating. After I had known her for a while, and knew about some of her other friends, I felt I could trust her with my "Big Secret". I have never regretted it for a minute.
I'm sure that there's someone out there who is right for you. Please don't give up.
LittleOne