So after reading the last episode of bike ( was bonkers as usual :)) I went on to read the comments.
3 out of the 4 comments where about men being just an extension of there genitalia or the likes ( and to make it clear it was far more racy then that). Now I want to ask you , how can a bunch of people who suffer from the wrong doings of society gender classification can be so sexist , so misandric and down right ignorant and offensive toward one gender?
This post will refer to "you" as those who wrote that comments or those who share the same mind state as them on this subject.
Can you not see that what you are saying is hurtful towards the male kind ? Can you truly be parents to male kids or friends with males and think such lowly of them ? Things like this is part of what leads to the lack of proper treatment of male sex abuse/harassment victim and are a sexual harassment by their own right
You just sicken me! You make half of the population look like sex addicts and useless where there are plenty of examples of men that were/are way better then you'll ever be! ( I want to see one of you write a play like Shakespeare , or invent a mathematical system like Newton)
I know some of you will say it was "just a joke" , but I bet that each one of you who will say that will go out against a bunch of men that makes a sexist joke about women/their bodily parts, so spare me your double standard nonsense.
As for me , I have to think if I want to be a part of a community who thinks my amazing brother, my loving dad, my supportive and funny friends and my smart colleges are nothing more then a mere sex driven machine . Right now I think the answer is no.
Very disappointed.
Lily.
Comments
I count my brothers...
my nephews and my brothers-in-law along with friends and especially my son as those who are worthy of honor and esteem and trust as men of character. I cannot say all men I have known are honorable, as some of you already know. But I can say that most men I've known are good men. Especially many of the men who frequent these pages as writers and commentators.
Painting half the human race with a broad brush isn't just misandric, but is very unfair. Portraying male characters in a negative light certainly is the prerogative of any author; it makes literary and personal sense. It does remain disappointing, however, that commentary that makes broad negative statements about men continue to cast the entire gender in a less than positive light.
Love, Andrea Lena
You Both...
...know where I stand on this. There's plenty of good and bad across the entire spectrum. I feel for those that have experienced the bad and hope that they can find some good.
I Have! ;)
Love And Hugs,
Jonelle
[email protected]
Reprehensible!!!
I guess the Closet isn't as big as I thought! How disappointing! Many of us here are still men; are condemned to be men by society, and many while transgendered in some way don't want or can't afford to have SRS.
Does this make us the kind of shits that these comments portray? I don't think so. I'm a second class citizen because I'm TG an now I guess I'm a third class citizen because I'm a man. Disappointing: I thought this community was better than this!
Isn't it bad enough that most of the stories present men as being insensitive, drunken bullies.
You may not have noticed that most of the authors here are still men physically. Do you include them in your diatribes?
What were you thinking?
Ole
We are each exactly as God made us. God does not make mistakes!
Gender rights are the new civil rights!
Hey Ole.
This is exactly what I am going out against! I know there are plenty of men in here and I can't stand to think how hard it is on you guys ( big hug for moral support).
,Ole.
I think you are amazing, and that's a decision that is independent of gender.
It really does seem like folks tend to forget their life lessons very easily.
This too is a human characteristic. For me, I just try to remember that
being transgenderd is not an either/or, and Many fall somewhere nearer middle.
Human isn't either/or, with even nice people being capable of saying really
inconsiderate things. And... if anyone needs to see someone who's really in
need of some 'constructive criticism', that's why mirrors were invented.
So.
Any time either you or Lilly feel disenfranchised or marginalized, you can
join my group: The quiet silly people. We're the largest club, because,
Sooner or later, everyone belongs.
Sarah
Of course, You Are Right
As I am one of those who made the offensive comment, you must realize it was made in jest. While in the military, several of my acquaintences made the comment that a woman was a "life support system for a cunt". I find both comments equally insensitive and inappropriate; however, that's how many in the sexist environment think. Maybe it was alcohol speaking; however, alcohol was not always involved. There are those of either sex, gender, and sexual preference who think of nothing more than the next orgasm, the next conquest. That is reality. Fifty plus years ago, I was pursuaded to follow that mentality even though what I wanted most was a loving, close relationship. That was totally uncool in the group I associated with. Fortunately, I found someone when I was in my late 20's who provided that relationship. We've been married for 42 years.
What we are really talking about is bigotry. Whether it is racial, ethnic, religious, or sexual, it is still bigotry. How many times do the characters, whether protagonists or antagonists, in the stories on this site express one of these forms of bigotry. Many of the authors, including yours truly, lose site of objectiveness. We have been hurt in many ways, and that clouds our objectivity, our perception, and our expression. There are more sexists out there than we would like to admit. Just review the commercials on American TV. Sex sells, and gross sex sells grossly. Society reinforces these attitudes. People wear many faces. Where they are and who they are with affects the faces they wear.
Portia
What bothers me
Isn't the portrait of human beings as a sexual being, as we are due to our mammal heritage, what bothers me is that those kind of comments rob men from there human shadow and that is the worse kind of chauvinism.
It seems that in our society it's ok and just to describe men as a primal being that only works on the basics of instincts while doing so to females is down right sexist. As I don't believe in double standard I feel that it's my duty to speak up when no one says so.
While I am not a theist I have one story that I do like from the Jewish bible : When god wants to destroy Sedom and Gamora he checks to see if there is a certain number of righteous men in there ( 37) ,proclaiming that we shouldn't classify the entire city as sinners if there is a portion of them that aren't ones and thus hurting them is unjust. The thought behind it is that you shouldn't make broad generalization because it might cause harm to innocent human beings.
I appreciate the fact that you can look at your own comments and see the wrong in it, it takes a great human being to do so .
Lily.
Repeat and rinse
This is an old issue.
My opinion has always been, of course there are good men out there. However Portia brings up a good point that there is enough alpha males in the world coercing other males into wrongful thinking that it causes a problem. One bad apple, etc. There is enough of bad male behavior out there that it IS a problem much like Jihadists influence perceptions of that group also. Sure they may not be everyone, but the damage they cause?
And men, especially young men are driven by their hormones if you remember unless you transitioned so young that you don't recall. I remember being men in groups and yes there is the obsessiveness. Keep in mind that there has always been that 'boys will be boys' attitude in society and not enough reining in of them. Let them 'sow their wild oats' BS. And they do do it. Simon is young enough to still be hormonally driven and he still seems to be the little ol' immature school boy type really so his behavior fits his characterization.
Kim
You understand
That the term alpha was first applied to wolves where there is an alpha male and alpha female, the breeding pair and mated for life. It is not an insult to be labelled an alpha and it implies characteristics in direct opposition to the way in which it is generally used.
I apologise, but
My experience of boys/men has generally not been good. They either wanted to beat me up or take advantage of me in some way.
I was fortunate in having a good father and have considerate and accepting brother and friends. Too many times, though, they were 'always right' and discounted my opinion .
My neighbour was widowed nearly 2 years ago and has recently joined a 'friendship' website. She has found, however, that virtually all the men that she has met have merely wanted sex.
S.
Hear, hear!
As a cis male, I have to say we're as diverse as the rest of human society. While there are unfortunately far too many males who think they're [insert deity here]'s gift to humankind and apparently believe it's their mission in life to scatter their seed far and wide (regardless of the opinion of those at the receiving end), there are exceptions - of all ages.
Having said that, Simon Cameron has often demonstrated that it's possible to want as much bedroom time with his wife as possible (hence the jibes about thinking with his 'built-in hosepipe'), while still being an adoring daddy who supports his ever-growing collection of children (and even young adults regarding him as a father figure!)
Personally, I couldn't give two hoots about "bedroom aerobics" - I'd be far more interested in companionship and company (besides which, I like having a bed to myself!) and as for children... try spending a few hours in the presence of an under five who expects you to interact with them (I'm sure what he says makes perfect sense to him - but it sounds like incoherent gobbledegook to me! Never mind having been to nursery / play 'n' stay, he's been introduced by peers to the concepts of play warfare - ugh!), or living next door to one and hearing the inevitable regular bedtime "I don't want to sleep!" tantrums (which often turn into shouting matches between mum and daughter)... ugh, no thanks. I'm sure they can be darlings occasionally...
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Defending the indefensible: So sad...
I was raised by a father and mother who taught me not only tolerance but acceptance and who taught me to love others and to not only accept but rejoice in diversity. They taught by example.
My father was big on honor and acting honorably. He was manly and adventurous in all the best ways. He played golf but didn't ignore his wife and son to do it, maybe 4 to 6 times each year. He raced power boats on Lake Michigan when he was in his twenty's but gladly gave it up to spend time with his wife whom he adored and when I came along he spent all his spare time with his family.
I was taught not to fight except for defense or to help others who couldn't defend themselves. An honorable person could not allow the innocent or the weak to be abused. That, of course, included women who any decent man would go out of his way to protect.
He also believed that women were autonomous, separate, intelligent people who were to be consulted, and listened to with respect.
I never saw him drunk! when he taught me about drinking, his only rule was, "control it, don't let it control you." His exact words were more earthy: "stop drinking BEFORE you get stupid!"
My father never was violent toward women. I have never been violent toward women. I accept EVERYONE as they see themselves and without question! There are lots of good men and I honestly believe we outnumber the total assholes you seem to have met.
But please, don't tar us all with the same brush! To say, "All men" is no less bigoted than saying, "All Catholics", or "All Blacks" or "All Whites" or "All Jews" or "All Polish". The only ALL is that we're all different. I had an aunt who hated "All Belgians". Now, I ask ya? I always thought she was playing with a really short deck. But is that any less reasonable than putting down "All men"?
Ole
We are each exactly as God made us. God does not make mistakes!
Gender rights are the new civil rights!