I would like some advice all please
My dad and i are taking care of my grandmother she is experiencing Alztimer which runs in the family and im certain that her app at the doctors tommorrow is to clarify it. My dad although good natured doesnt know how to properly respond to it and has a tendancy yell or even raise voice etc. But I am wondering of any advice u can give me on how best to carefor my grandmother and make it alittle easier on the rest of us. Let it be known a home' and paid caregivers are out of the question. I have looked up how to bet handle it but I figured maybe some of my friends here could help to give me some advice too.
thankfully yours
Erin Amelia Fletcher
Comments
Background
I have work for over 10 years in dementia care for the elderly as a recreation activity officer.
First of all you must understand that there are different types of Dementia - Alzheimer's is only one of them. Everybody is different and so whatever kind of background, and how difficulties in life were handled how life was enjoyed etc will all be part of how she will carry on with her life.
The best thing to do is for her to keep socially active but with some becvause they know they forget stuff they get embarresed to be around people.
Don't force her to do what she doesn't want to. Sometimes, though, a little prompting is needed and she may need to see you're willing to do the same thing as her before she tries it as well.
There are other things I will tell you, but I'll pm you.
Cheers,
Cliff
my grandmother had Alzhimers
and I helped take care of her. The best things you can do for her is find a routine she likes, and stick to it. Even small changes could make her upset. Try to talk to your dad about being as calm as he can be around her as well. There are medications that might help, and hopefully you can get her on them. Last of all, you may find it easy for her to take up your life, so make sure you are taking care of yourself too. Eat right, get enough rest, and take time to do things that relax you (Like writing?, giggle.) Good luck, and feel free to vent if you need to.
Dorothycolleen
Second Opinions
RAMI
It is important to determine if your grandmother has Alzheimer's or some of form of dementia. Some physicians are too quick to diagnose Altheimer's without doing proper tests. You need to make sure that the Physician doing the assessment asks the right questions, so that the answers are real.
My mom, moved to an ACLF near me. When the neurologist wanted to discuss where she lived, give her address, and things like that, my mom started answering about her old home. The so-called doctor treated her as if she was an idiot because she did not know the address of a facility she did not want to be in and did not care about. Fired that docotr ass real quick and found another doctor who worked better with us.
The need for limitations varies as the degree of demenia/Althzheimer's progresses. If the condition is severe then safety and security becomes a major issue. The location where she is living needs to be secured so that she can not go wondering off. The most frightening thing would be to wake-up in the middle of the night to find the front door open, and her missing.
It is also importnat that you stay, sane and healthy. If you can spread the burden among others that is for the best.
As for your dad, he needs counselling on his own. He needs someone to remind him, that his mother took care of him when he was a baby/child and it is now his turn to return the acts of love, kindness and nurturing she gave him.
RAMI
RAMI
I helped take care of both my mother in law
...and my wife's grandmother, both of who succumbed to Alzheimers. Find out from the local hospital or do an online search to see if there are any AD support groups in your area. Having someone who is already in the midst of this or has gone through it can be a valuable resource. The hospital may also be able to help you connect with whatever help is available from your state or county. As difficult as it is, it can be a very rewarding experience. I am so grateful that I was able to participate in my Natalie's care, and I pray that you find the strength and comfort to deal with this challenge. My heart and my prayers go out to you.
Dio vi benedica tutti
Con grande amore e di affetto
Andrea Lena
Love, Andrea Lena
My prayers to all who suffer this way.
I have not prayed in the name of Jesus Christ in a long time, so you are one of the first. I have no idea what so ever how you feel, but my heart goes out to you. This is gonna be hard and I pray that God gives you strength.
Gwen
Wow...
Wow, have you got your work cut out for you. But, you've already figured that out.
My favorite Uncle was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a few years ago. He has his up and down days (don't we all).
From talking with my cousin (who has the medical power of attorney) and aunt, the best things for him is a steady diet of social interactions... No - not so much he's exhausted by them, but some EVERY day. They also need to be divergent options - not the same thing over and over... But SOME regularity is important as well, or he can become overwhelmed.
Another point that was made to me was that to a point - it's important to empower my uncle... Hold him responsible for his actions, until he proves he can't be... Take steps to HELP him be responsible, etc. Once he starts forgetting things... Provide lists. For Alzheimer's specifically - I've been told that reviewing current events - helps keep them in the mind...
As you figured out - yelling at the patient really doesn't help (though, I've been told that there comes a time where it no longer hurts beyond the moment when the yelling occurs, but I'm not so sure about that).
As was indicated by another - there are OTHER forms of dementia out there. It's important to recognize what form your grandmother's takes. My father-in-law is showing signs of SOME form. (He forgets to take his insulin. He takes the wrong kind. He over packs for trips (but - he's done that for 30 years, so it may not be related). He re-tells the same stories (more often). etc.) What he forgets about events past has a very different pattern from Alzheimer's. We've been told that some of the same things help - the list of meds and other lists certainly help!
So - as you probably already knew - no SIMPLE answer.
Best wishes to you, all of you,
Anne
P.S. as has also been noted - make sure you have plenty of support! It also sounds like your dad needs some help - professional or not... (Though professionals can be expensive - they are also OUTSIDE the family and can be very helpful... The professional would have your dad's best interest in mind - nobody else, including yours.)
Dementia
Run don't walk to a dementia support group and take grandfather with you. Every family member should be encouraged to go as well.
A photo album or scrapbook with photos of people and brief bios will help as well but you have to help HER build it and include recent pictures of herself and why she is making the book
Dayna
Alztimers
Hopefully, there is a medicine that can help her.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
To the good advice others
To the good advice others have given I would add check out the Alzheimer's Association:
http://www.alz.org/index.asp
They have useful information for caregivers, and message boards where you can communicate with others in your situation.
Kris
Kris
{I leave a trail of Kudos as I browse the site. Be careful where you step!}
Ask for some who has had a family member have alzheimers
Since home health care is out of the picture, and your own father tends to yell and exhibit tendencies to think his mom is ok, may havuign someone who has dealt with alzheimers as a care taker can assist you in understanding how you grandmother should be cared for.
It is not something that can be taken lightly, she needs direction with understanding. take her to a Modern maturity center for creative arts classes. take her out to dinner. let her get a set routine, eventually she may forget all that is around her but while she stillhas someof her faculties treat her as you would every day, be kind to her, don't yell at or mistreat her.
I have a friend whose dad has alzheimers and he knows how to do a lot of things but can't remember how or when to take his medicine. he is slowly deeclining in his disease but he still has a good idea of what he wants.
Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.
Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.
ALzheimer's and coconut oil
Recently we've figured out that coconut oil helps a lot.
http://www.google.com/search?q=alzheimer%27s+coconut+oil
IANAMD so read yourself and form your own opinions. I'm eating it now.
- Moni