A few days ago I posted a blog entry that, after an hour or so, I realized i should have never have posted. I deleted it, but I had received a couple of responses,one of which I didn't acknowledge, and one I responded to in a totally wrong manner, hurting someone a great deal.
I have no excuse, and I wont even try to attempt one. I hurt a friend who has been nothing but supportive and understanding since we first met, and I feel terrible about it. Since then, she has removed me from her friends list, and ignored me, here. I don't blame her. I blame myself.
I can do nothing but apologize to her, here, and hope she sees it. I was boorish and insensitive, and I have to try to set things right again, if I can. I won't name her, but if she reads this, she will know who she is and, hopefully will know that I feel absolutely awful about my behavior and my unfeeling response to her caring comment. The last thing I ever wanted to do was disappoint her or make her feel unheeded or unappreciated.
If you do read this hon, I hope you can forgive me for my insensitive remarks. From the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. Please contact me and let me know that you are a better person than I am. God knows I have made my share of stupid mistakes in my life, and I'm sure I'll make many more. I only hope that this one will not ruin what was a good friendship.
I am very, very sorry hon. Please forgive me.
Cathy
Comments
Hang in there.
Life's a bitch for T folk in general. Hopefully it will blow over soon. :)
Gwen
I've Done Lots
I've done lots of horrible things over the years. We're not omnicient beings. We're emotional, we're not particularly logical all the time, and we're operating with limited information inputs. It's only natural that we make mistakes.
It's nothing to be proud of, of course. I try to learn from my mistakes. I try to practice patience, and try to train my instincts to serve me better. Where I can, I try to make up for any harm I've caused. If I can't make it good, I at least try to spread a little goodness somewhere else whenever the chance arises. I think that's the best any of us can ever do.
Some of the horrible things we do aren't as horrible as we think they are, of course, and some of the things we think we did well and right turn out to have horrible consequences of which we're never made aware. It's part of the whole living-a-life thing. We exist in a world with other people, who are also driven by emotions and not particularly logical and operating with limited information inputs, too.
All we can do is cut ourselves some slack, and do the same for everyone else we interact with. There will be hurt feelings and misunderstandings and things blown all out of proportion. Don't let those stop you from living, or stop you from doing all the kind and good things you do for other people and for yourself. It's all about the balance, dear. On balance, I'd say you're a much better person than you give yourself credit for.