by Machara and Chryos Stormwing
Special thanks to
my love Chryos who creates this with me
Please note that my editor did not yet get to fully review this chapter. I may update it with corrections later.
“Oh, but the evening has barely begun, hasn't it? Well then… let's get started…“
Horst looked at both of his children and smiled.
“I think it would be far more comfortable and adequate, however, to begin your training in the living room. Why don't you follow me and we'll start?“
He led them down, looked around and then started moving the couch standing near the fireplace to the corner of the room opposite of the entertainment wall, clearing space on the floor. Then he took three big cushy pillows and put them down on the floor. Two of them side by side close to the fireplace, and a third more distant to it, but more centered, having the three pillows form a triangle. Then he went to the fireplace, put quite a lot of logs on it and lay a hand on them. The siblings watched and could feel the heat emanating and air start circulating around the room, and after a quarter of a minute, the logs first singed and then caught fire.
He turned around and looked at their curious and slightly amazed reaction.
“Why don't you seat yourself on a pillow nearer to the fire and face towards the third one, please?“
He waited until they went to their spots and had an amused grin as they bumped into each other, apparently somewhat entranced as they attempted to head to the same pillow. After halting, looking at each other with an apologetic and embarrassed smile, they each found themselves a pillow and sat down.
Then, Horst took the third pillow and faced them.
“So… let’s begin by letting me explain some things to you. I can of course only tell you from my own experiences, however since we all seem very similar, I think most of what I am going to describe will apply to you, too.
However first, really try to make yourself comfortable. Maybe by sitting similarly to me…“
He directed an open hand to his cross-legged stance, his back straight upright, and his hands resting on his knees.
“… might help you too, but any way you feel relaxed should do.
Enjoy the warmth radiating from the fire, feel the air circulating, but don't concentrate on it too much, just let it flow towards you. It will help, later.
The attribute that defines us most, is that we are shapeshifters. We have two main forms we can be in, human and draconic. At least that is what I feel we are… some form of dragons. You may choose other names if that makes you feel more comfortable. However, even in our human form we still remain somewhat draconic in our cores. Our genes may mostly shift to that of humans if we assume our human forms, but in detailed analysis, if you look for it, will always show some differences. Our human form has no real variations, but our draconic one does and can be controlled, to some extent. You always had those genetic variations in you, but until recently they lay dormant. Now that they are active, they will remain so, and you need to learn to deal with the consequences. Learning to shift between human and draconic form is your first and most important task if you wish to live somewhat more easily. Not that you should be ashamed of who you are, but there are too many people that will treat you differently.
Another important attribute that you can use to your benefit and make it easier to manage the rest, is the absorption of light and heat. It allows you to acquire energy which makes shifting easier and less painful. It can also make your day to day lives easier with that additional strength and energy, among other things. I think you already felt the effects of the fire. The absorption of heat and turning it into internal energy is something you do passively. However, if you allow it to happen and make yourself open to it, you can draw more energy. Light can charge you to a lesser degree but that requires more experience. It can also help to avoid sunburns.”
He smirked, at that.
“Rest and calmness makes it easier to draw from this energy. Meditation will help you gain more calmness and learn more easily. This is why we are sitting like this, aside from me preferring this posture.“
Horst smiled at them, and let himself sink deeper into the cushion without losing much of his upright stance.
“Your bodies are currently still in transition, even though I feel the better part of your changes are finished. Basically, your bodies are slowly shifting on their own. When I manifested, the same happened to me, but shortly after finishing the manifestation to the default draconic form it reverted to the human form again. Only later did I learn to control the form, over months and even years.
I will help you gain some control. Shifting is like a muscle you can train. Without training, it will feel difficult, and active shifting can cause some pain, aside from being tiring. As you learn and train it - there is also a mental component to it, of course, more so than normal muscle training - it will cost less energy and happen more quickly, and allow you a greater range of forms.
Without applying some direction to the desired form, your body will slowly return to your default one. For me that is the human one, however, I am not sure if that is the case with you, so you will have to find out by yourselves.
Aside from telling and describing to you what to do and what to feel for, I can guide you in another way, if you consent to it. I think you already have noticed that you are susceptible to feeling some emotions of the people around you, typically when they are more intense. You may even learn to let others feel a bit of what you do. It sometimes happens to you without your control if you feel particularly strongly. That is another reason why you should learn to meditate. It will help to avoid uncontrolled surges since it can be dangerous and I consider it an invasion of free will and even privacy if you force it on others, willingly or not.
If you allow me, I can direct some of my emotions and feelings to you, and it should help you learn and find your way to direct your shifting.
Now, before we continue, if you have some questions for me, go ahead and ask them.“
Garrus looked at the 'father figure' as he swayed slowly back and forth, being dazed, entranced and cross-eyed.
“Teach us. The ways of the mind and body….“
He collected himself somewhat and added.
“Seriously? I don't doubt your words but… you're basically saying we're shapeshifting battery packs?“
Horst grinned.
“Did I mention battery packs? It is a bit more complicated than that, but you got the jist of it.“
More seriously, he continued.
“Now…. Drew, Garrus… are you ok with me directing some of my feelings on to you?
I should warn you though, it may be a bit rough at first. I’d like to remind you at this point to please not to try sending feelings to others, even to each other. It could have drastic side effects if not moderated and directed carefully.“
Garrus goggled.
“Okay.“
He tried not to feel anything and eyed Drew curiously to see whether he’d agree, as well.
Drew first looked to his father after a pause of silence, almost coming out of a trance, and then turned to his brother, questioningly, but smiling. He then answered, as well.
“Then I'm fine with it too, dad.“
Horst continued with the lesson.
“So, before you do anything yourselves, just sit there, relax and allow yourself to feel. As you learn to feel and guide your own emotions it will later also allow you to block out unwanted external ones. Your own can never fully be blocked, however, only calmed.“
Horst closed his own eyes, becoming tranquil.
“Close your eyes.“
Doing so, and trying to be calm as well, Garrus felt nothing change. Some thoughts came drifting in and with them, associated emotions, and they seemed to drag at him, at first, somewhat chaotically. However, as minutes drifted by, the crackling of the fire seemed to draw to the forefront, and with it, the heat emanating from it seemed to hit Garrus. Minutes later the feeling of heat subsided somewhat but he then felt it permeating him more subtly and a feeling of being alive came with it.
“Good. Now you are starting to absorb more energy.”
Horst commented as he felt the progress of his offspring.
“Soon you should start to feel something new. Just try to allow the feeling, and don't be scared …“
The last minutes of calmness caused a feeling of security seeping in. Those were then pushed in the background and he at first felt a tingling all over and inside his body which were soon replaced by some twinges. These initially just seemed to tickle but then got more pressing and he felt a bit uncomfortable. A new feeling of soreness and then pricks of pain started. He felt somewhat restless for a minute as that continued but then something felt being pushed and moved. Finally, all those feelings faded out, again.
“Open your eyes again.“
Horsts words pushed Garrus as well as Drew - who had also perceived all those feelings - out of their trance. Following his command, Garrus and Drew saw their father still sitting there, however now fully human, just as they remembered him before all the changes to their lives started.
“What you sensed is to a degree what I felt as I shifted to this form. It is not exactly the same as you will feel, I think, but it should come close enough. Now, if you feel ready, I'd like you to try the same. I should warn you however that some of the feelings may be more intense as it will be your first attempt. Don't try to push too hard, rather allow it to happen. Do so by remembering how your body looked like before your manifestation. Then, once you got a feeling for it and see it before your mind’s eye, recall the feeling of energy and warmth that permeated you when you allowed it to flow through you. Expect some discomfort and pain, but let go if those get too strong.
Just try it. I'll feel out for you. Maybe it's easier if you start first, Garrus.“
“… right. like I could replicate that.“
Totally disbelieving now, Garrus closed his eyes, yet again, trying to focus his mind on what just happened. He felt like he was already missing some of the pieces. Was it more twingy in the stomach or the chest, he wondered.
The room was silent except for an occasional popping in the fire.
He managed to calm himself enough to enter that relaxed state he was in before, again….
Minutes passed and nothing happened. Finally, Garrus sighed deeply, exhaling almost completely and then, slowly, gradually, something started to change.
The clouds of unordered thoughts drifted away, leaving a thick veil of blackness on his mind. He could sense it and then he pictured himself, remembering his own face and body as he had seen himself in the bathroom mirror the last time he had still been in his own apartment seemingly months ago… though something seemed off.
Some of those clouds moved through his consciousness again, altering the vision, giving him fragments of images from other parts of his life and even fictional scenes he had seen on television. And then something within him started incorporating those images into the pictures he had of his life, changing all of it.
The images never formed perfectly, they always seemed somewhat jumbled, but he felt it was enough.
More time ticked by in silence, and finally he felt the vision coalescing into changes and he felt his body shift, similar to how his father had relayed them before.
Garrus awoke again. His body was slender and soft, pointed ears and slanted eyes adorning his face, chiseled from the fairest of marble so that Tolkien himself probably couldn't discern him from an elf now. Almost all the draconic features were completely gone, save for a very slight pointedness of two of his fangs that Host and Drew still noticed.
Garrus started grinning like a fool.
“I… it didn't work, did it?“
A breath escaped Horst’s mouth. He stared at Garrus, who heard an “Eek“ coming from the other side.
“Um, in some way, it did. I did not expect it like that, though… seems there are some differences, after all.
Wait a moment…“
Horst stood up, left the room and soon returned with a hand mirror. He sat back down.
“Why don't you see for yourself?“
He turned the mirror towards Garrus, who looked at his reflection and saw himself, yet not him, at the same time. Garrus remembered some of the images that just flew by in his mind, a minute ago, and recognized semblance. Startled by his own appearance, he felt a rippling in his body and watched his features shift back to his previous draconic self, just that now those traits seemed a bit more pronounced.
Horst just chuckled, being amused rather than surprised.
“Don't be alarmed. While some details in your human form just now were not expected, your changing back is not. It was a good first attempt, well done. It takes practice for you to 'lock in' to a form. Your body tends to be drawn to either the form your mind imposes, or back to your default. Whichever that is, depends on circumstances. But it does prefer not to be in a form of flux. Your emotions can cause it to shift or ripple, however, or to return back to what it feels is more stable.
I did not manage multiple stable human forms, but yours seemed to be at least semi-stable. Can you explain what you did or how you felt?“
Still confused after a moment, longer than would seem necessary, Garrus finally looked up at his father, then back at Drew.
“What just…“
“I just… tried to clear my mind… didn't work too well at first but then it got better. The problem was that when I tried to imagine myself, other thoughts kept creeping in… I don't think that's something I can control though. It felt… directed.“
“Hm. Something that just happened, or was it something imposed on you?“
Garrus stared, unsure.
“Damned if I know. That's like asking a kid what piece in the carburetor is missing when you see black smoke coming from the exhaust…“
“Ok. Maybe we'll find out as you get more experienced. I don't think it’s concerning, but I am curious why it happened, and whether it was an accident or a trend.
Anyway, Drew, why don't you give it a try now. Meanwhile, Garrus, similarly to how you opened yourself to the fire, open yourself up to Drew’s feelings. It may not work just yet, but if and when it does it will help you with your own efforts.
Drew, just try, just as I described before. Some stray thoughts are common at first, but try to hang only to those that you have in mind or that feel right to you.“
Horst watched his offspring as he sat there, closing his eyes, and Garrus watching him.
For a minute or so, nothing happened but Drew got calmer. Then he felt a tug followed by a rushing flowing feeling, with tingling and small pricks of pain. Those came and went, for a while.
Watching Drew, they saw his features melt and the purple color left his skin, but that soon returned. His features fluctuated back and forth for a few times but then his original draconic form returned.
Drew’s eyes opened, and he looked around frustrated.
“I tried, and I could feel something happening, but something kept pushing back.“
Horst just sat there at first, a humming faintly audible. He looked thoughtful. Then he looked at Drew again, studying his features… her features… then he started smiling.
“I think I know what the problem is. You remembered yourself as you used to be. Unlike Garrus, your natural form has changed more dramatically. Your feminine side is the dominant one now. I have seen you yesterday and today. Not just your body has changed. When you tried to shift back to your old self, your body and part of yourself pushed back.
I'd like you to try again, but before that please remember how you felt and behaved lately and rediscover yourself. I have confidence that you will manage, but it is ok to take your time until it feels right. It needs to, for it to work. Garrus has it easier since he can picture his previous human male form and go with that, but you need to find your new more female form, first. Study yourself in a mirror as you are, it should give you hints.“
Drew looked at Horst, confused, then shocked, and finally angrily. His stare bore into his father’s eyes. He felt frustration and anger. This was his father’s fault, he thought - without him and his damn genes, this would never have happened! He felt hot, but not uncomfortably so. The pillow below him started to smoke, and his clothes singed.
Realizing this, it stopped instantly. Feeling defeated, he slumped forward. His hands shot out to steady himself. Having managed that, he raised his hands towards his face as if to hide, almost touching his face. He began sobbing and tears started rolling down his cheeks, but before they dropped they evaporated into steam, instead.
He looked up again, at his father, angry and in pain.
“I can't. Let me alone, dad!“
Drew stood up and looked around. As his gaze rested on Garrus, he felt better, and he could not help smiling briefly. He looked up towards the stairs and the door to his room, almost longingly, but decided to keep standing.
Horst stood up as well and sighed.
“I understand, dear. Take your time. Please try to practice again soon, though. It is important.“
He looked over at Garrus.
“Let me know if you want me to come again tomorrow evening, ok?“
Horst turned and headed for the door. After it clunked shut it was silent again. Garrus felt Drew’s body trembling as he stood close beside him. He then watched Drew walk away and head for his room, rather quickly.