*****
An Eventful Shopping Expedition
*****

Hi there, my name is Andrew. Here is a short story in which I recount to you, in as accurate a manner as I can remember, what happened one afternoon on a shopping trip, that turned out to be pretty eventful.

I lived in a small town in the North of England. There wasn't much going on there at all, it was pretty dead as a place really, and there were only a few shops to speak of. Fortunately however, there were two larger towns about 10 miles either side of mine. A short bus journey's ride to either.

I should mention here that I'm somewhere on the TG spectrum. I don't know exactly where, as things change within me. Sometimes I think I'm just a CD, other times I feel it's more serious. I'm not fussed, why put a label on it?

I also should mention this happened when I was 20, and before I was 'online', with all the access to purchasing 'things' that that offers. These were the days when one actually had to go to actual shops! Imagine that!

I had a previous shopping experience on another occasion in one of the larger towns. There was a small independent womanswear shop in this town. I had built up the courage to go in and look for something to purchase for myself. I was however, so embarrassed it was cringe-worthy, and the saleswoman could sense this a mile away and I don't think she was amused. I left awkwardly and empty-handed. What an awful experience that was! But we live and learn, it was a lesson in what not to do. Painful, but it was a lesson.

Now, enough waffle, and onto what happened this time. I knew of another small womenswear shop in the other town. It had been there since I could remember, so they must have done quite well business-wise. I planned my attack... I mean, my shopping visit to this place. I knew confidence was key, and don't look and embarrassed or worse, ashamed. It's perfectly normal. I'm sure they get guys all the time coming in and buying things, for their wives or girlfriends of course!

Scenario:
Male customer: I'm looking for something for my wife
Saleswoman: Do you know her size?
Male customer: She's a 12
Saleswoman to herself: Uh huh, funny, she's the same size as you, how convenient...

I digress. Onto this shopping trip.

It was a Thursday afternoon, I didn't know when quiet times in the shop would be, but I figured that that was as good a day/time as any. I didn't want a busy shop with lots of witnesses. I got the bus there, and during the short journey I repeated to myself to stay calm, and have confidence. Confidence is everything, if you can brazen it out, it'll be fine.

I alighted the bus at the right stop, and had a few minutes walk to the shop. Have confidence, I continued to repeat to myself. And smile to the assistant, you're just another normal customer, nothing to see here.

I entered the shop, and my eyes scanned the place, and who was in it, taking as much of it in as I could, as quickly as I could, without looking obviously nervous. It was a fairly small shop, and every space was utilised with efficiency. There was one woman behind the counter, a pleasant looking middle-aged woman, who smiled as I entered the door. There was one other customer at one side of the shop. Good, I thought to myself, it's nice and quiet.

As there was someone at one side of the shop, my avoidance meant I turned to the other side to start looking at what the shop had to offer. I'd clocked that dresses were at the side with the other person, dammit. However, on the side I was at, there was a selection of blouses. Great! This shop was geared to the slightly older woman, I knew that before from glancing through the window on previous occasions. Which was cool, as I liked a whole range of styles, from young to older. Some of the older designs offered a more feminine style, which I quite liked.

I was stood by a rail of blouses, different styles and different colours. Right, look for something nice, in my size (I was a UK size 12). I had been stood there keeping myself to myself and looking through the blouses, trying to appear nonchalant, when I heard over my shoulder a voice saying "Can I help you?." I got a little startle, but I contained myself.

"I'm just looking, thanks"

"Certainly, if there's anything I can help you with..."

"No it's okay"

Keep the nerve, I told myself, you've not been rumbled. I continued to look at the blouses on offer, and my eyes were drawn to a really lovely one in particular. It was an ivory colour, with a really pretty lace detailing trimming the buttons down the front, and a little lace detail on the collar. I picked it off the rail to look at it better, it was a really lovely blouse, and in my size, and the price wasn't too bad. I determined that I was going to get it. This was going to be a short but sweet shopping trip.

I took the blouse over to the counter where the helpful lady was stood. She smiled as I approached and I smiled back, nothing to see here. Though I'm sure my smile was so nervous it betrayed a whole lot of things.

Then it happened. I can't recall what her exact words were, I was taken by surprise. I'd had the whole trip planned, and this wasn't in the version that I'd foreseen. She asked me if it was a gift or if it was for myself. Now I should have said it was a gift, that would have been the end of it, I'd have made the purchase and left. However, in all my self-talk of having confidence, and nothing to be ashamed about etc. etc., I'd talked myself into being a little more honest than I'd reckoned on.

Stupid me I replied that it was for me. D'oh!

The lady behind the counter smiled at that. She was cool with it, I was fine. She probably see's it all the time, comes with the territory of working in a womenswear shop. Then she dropped the question... would I like to try it on for size, and that there was a dressing room over there in the corner.

This wasn't how I'd foreseen things at all, and to say I was on the back foot and taken off-guard would be true, if an under-statement. So stupid me, I agreed to it, what was I thinking!? Really!?

I think with hindsight she was having fun at my expense, it was probably a slow day, and she could see my nervousness.

She guided me over to the dressing room, and I entered the small cubicle, clutching the blouse I coveted. She pulled the curtain closed behind me.

I took my jacket off, and placed it on the chair that was there. And I unbuttoned my shirt, and took it off and hung it on a hook on the cubicle wall. What was I doing? How did I get here? I took the blouse and slipped it on, and set about doing-up the little ivory cloth-covered buttons up the front. Once done I stretched my arms out, and fussed with the blouse a little, it was a really good fit.

Then I heard the lady from the other side of the curtain. Why was I surprised, like things hadn't gone far enough already? She called from the other side of the curtain to come out, and she'll check it for style and fit. Well my brain wasn't functioning, between surprise and nerves I was running on auto-pilot, thinking capacity had largely gone.

I turned around to face the curtain (so to speak, it wasn't the final one), and pulled it aside. She was stood there and smiled when she saw me. "Oh it looks lovely, here, turn around" she fussed a little and concluded, like I had, that it was a nice fit. Thanks for the second opinion.

She remarked that something wasn't right, she thought (or pretended to think) a moment. Then it came to her, she said that I'm not filling it out properly. Excuse me? She continued further, and mentioned that she stocks a small range of underwear 'over there', you need a bra under a blouse like that, to fill it out, and it's pretty sheer in this light. What?

She could assist me, she insisted, and sized me up pretty quickly, in more ways than one I think. "You stay there, I have just the one." She left me to go to the other side of the shop, which wasn't far, and I could see her at the fore-mentioned small range of lingerie and nightwear. She returned holding a bra, which I was guessing was meant for me, who else could it be for?

"Go back in and get changed into this, then try the blouse on again" she said, handing me the bra.

"Do you need any help?" she asked.

"No, no, I think I'm okay" I replied, flustered.

"Good"

I went back into the cubicle and she pulled the curtain closed behind me again. 'Who's in charge here?' I remember thinking to myself, one of many thinkings. So I did as suggested, and unbuttoned the fussy buttons, and took the blouse off. Then I thought to myself 'Shit', now she'll know I know how to put a bra on, dammit! I did know how, and I reckon she knew I knew. After getting it on and adjusting myself, I noted how accurately she'd sized me up, 32a, just right with a little padding, which I didn't have to hand, obviously. Then I got the blouse back on and fastened it up. Those buttons were ever so dainty and pretty, but a royal pain to do up.

Oh well, in for a penny... I opened the curtain again. I received a glowing appraisal from Irene (she'd told me her name previously). She told me that 'now' it looks really lovely, suits my complexion, etc. I didn't know where to look, and just smiled a lot like an idiot. Thanks Irene.

She asked me if I wanted to purchase the bra too, and how nicely it fit and looked lovely on me. I think I replied that I would.

I turned to go back into the cubicle to get changed back into my male shirt, when she pulled me up short. She had, apparently, just the right skirt to go with that blouse, the perfect companion. Whaaa...? Yes, you just stay there and I'll show you it, see what you think.

She made her way to a rail with skirts on it, and I could see that she knew exactly which one to go to, as she went straight to it. She plucked it from the rail and brought it to me, in my size too, I could see from the label... she was good!

I had to admit, she was right, it was a beautiful skirt. It was navy blue, long (I was guessing mid-calf), and had pleats all the way around. Kind of old-fashioned styling, but I like that.

She asked me if she was right, and that it was lovely wasn't it, and it would go really well with that blouse. I think I agreed. What was I doing? How did I get here? What day is it?

I really must try it on, see how it looks, I think she insisted that I do. I think I was powerless. Too young, nervous, naive, to know my own mind enough to refuse. I just went along with her authority and insistence. And she was so nice and effusive about everything, how could I not go along with it?

So she handed me this skirt, and I turned around again to go back into the dressing room. It's a wonder I wasn't getting dizzy, though maybe I was. I proceeded to unbutton my jeans, and pull them down and off. The blouse really was a nice fit, and didn't restrict this movement. I took the skirt off the hanger and held it in front of me to get it the right way round, and lowered it to the floor and stepped into it, then pulled it up to my waist, where I fastened the button at the back and did the little zipper up. She was good, it was a good fit.

I could say I felt terribly self-conscious. And I would have done, had it not gone past that point some time ago. I was beyond that and a bit like a robot. It was a state of surprisingly little anxiety and nervousness, quite pleasant actually, having surrendered control.

I admired the outfit in the mirror for a moment, before reckoning I had to show the awaiting Irene. I pulled the curtain aside and she looked in the cubicle from the outside. She gushed how lovely I looked, and how darling it was. I think she used the word 'darling' several times, for both the outfit and for me.

At this point now, I think she'd had most of her fun, and there wasn't much more she could do with me there. She sort of wrapped things up, effusing all the time about how darling and lovely. And I went back into the cubicle to get changed into my 'normal' clothes. While I was getting changed back, the glazed-over state I was in sort of came to an end, and I became a bit more aware again of reality. And I got nervous again, but it wasn't so bad this time around. I thought to myself it was actually sort of funny, and that I'll remember this for the rest of my life.

I stepped out of the dressing room, looking like the male that had entered the first time. Only, this time I was clutching a blouse, bra, and a skirt.

Irene took me over to the counter and accepted the items from me, and put them in bags for me. And she totted the items up on the till. Thank goodness she accepted credit cards, as I didn't have enough cash on me. I was only anticipating a single item, and a quick shopping experience.

Then it was all kind of over. I left Irene's little womenswear shop, with my bagged items. I checked my watch, I hadn't been in there as long as it felt. It felt like a lifetime of experience, but was actually not much more than half an hour.

I went to the bus stop, and waited for my bus. Still glazed over slightly, but with a warm feeling inside.

*****
The End
*****

Calum, meet Cassie:

It was a rainy Saturday afternoon, and Calum was daydreaming on the bus. Gazing absentmindedly out the window at the passing scenery, taking in it all and none of it.

He stirred to life as the bus drove into the outskirts of the town he was vacationing in with his Aunt, Anne 'auntie Anne' and his cousin Sarah. 'My stop soon' he reminded himself, cautious of the stop he was to get off at.

On arrival he alighted from the bus with a bounce, he was looking forward to seeing his Aunt again, and Sarah.

The driver alighted to retrieve the boy's rucksack from the luggage compartment, without a bounce in his step.

"Which is your's, son?"

"Erm... what? It's..." He couldn't see his rucksack anywhere. Startled out of his happy mood, he started to panic. "but it must be there, I left it right... there. It's gone, someone must have taken it?"

"I'm afraid I can't help you son, but I can give you the number of the depot, maybe somebody will return it in"

Calum folded the bus ticket with the number on the back, and slid it into his jeans pocket. Now his absent-mindedness was from struggling to think what to do, rather than pleasantly whiling away time.

He took out his phone and called his Aunt, to let her know he'd arrived, and to pick him up from the stop.

"She'll know what to do" he told himself under his breath.

Fifteen minutes passed and Anne pulled up to the kerb, waving and gesturing him into the car.

She noticed his lack of luggage as he deposited nothing in the rear seat, and himself in the front.

"Where's your things?"

Calum relayed to her what had happened. She tried to re-assure the boy that it'll be ok, but Calum wasn't as upbeat.

"We can call the depot on Monday, not much we can do until then I don't think"

"My damn ipod was in that bag too"

***

They pulled up outside Anne's house. It was a nice house, and Calum had lots of nice memories of holidays and visits there in the past.
As they entered, Anne Said "I'll make us some supper if you..." "Oh dear, I was going to say if you want a bath"

"Hmm" She thought.

"All my clothes were in my rucksack, I only have what I'm standing in" responded Calum, pretty glumly.

"Tell you what dear, after your bath you can find something of Sarah's to wear, she'll be bound to have something to fit, you's two are about the same size"

"How can I?"

"It's only us, and she won't mind. Tell you what I'll go find something and you go run a bath, then we'll have some supper and catch up on things"

"Well I guess, I dunno, I suppose"

As he bathed he noticed the lotions and potions in the bathroom.

"Damn, my good soap too"

Calum sufficed with what was available to bathe with. Distinctly floral scented soap, and scented shampoo.

He dried himself off after a brief soak, and wrapped a fluffy white towel around his middle and went through to 'his' room.

"What the... hmm... I suppose" He looked at the clothes on the bed laid out for him. 'Nothing that bad I guess', he thought. Jeans are jeans, but the butterfly sequins on the pocket? And a fairly shapeless t-shirt, but with a little heart emblem on the chest? Then he noticed the panties.

"Hmm..." At least they were plain white he thought to himself, though the little satin bow on the front didn't help. It did however cause an uneasy and odd feeling in his stomach which he couldn't explain. Uneasy but not disagreeable... odd.

"Oh well"

He got dressed hesitantly, but hesitancy or otherwise there was little choice in the matter. Good thing he and his cousin were similar in size.

He made his way downstairs, and walked awkwardly into the kitchen.

"Oh there you are Calum", "I made us some macaroni and cheese, you like that"

"Yes, thank you"

Nothing was said about the attire.

The two ate, and talked about what each had been up to. That took the boy's mind off the situation almost completely, and they enjoyed each others conversation.

They played scrabble together, no cheating, besides allowing capitals and acronyms, 'it's our own special rules'.

What with the fun of the flow of conversation and then the game, Calum had stopped thinking about what he was wearing, and was perfectly at ease, as if the clothes were his own.

Come 11pm they were both yawning, and it was obviously time for bed.

Anne read the boy's mind. "I'll get you something of Sarah's to wear, she has plenty of PJ sets" "You have to wear something"

While Calum brushed his teeth, his Aunt left a pyjama set on his bed. It was blue with a floral print on the bottoms, and a plain top.

"Blue for the boys" Calum thought to himself sardonically as he put them on.

He slept well that night... after he managed to get to sleep that is, what with thinking about his predicament and his missing things.

***

"Good morning, sleepyhead" Anne said cheerily.

"Morning"

"How did you sleep?, Okay?"

"Yeah"

"Well you can help me make breakfast, I like a cooked breakfast on Sunday mornings."

Breakfast was made. Breakfast was eaten hungrily.

'She's being nice not mentioning I'm wearing freakin' girls clothes' Calum thought to himself. But then that's auntie Anne, she's always nice.

"You're clothes are in the wash, should be done and dried this afternoon"

"Thank you" "What about these?" he gestured to his pyjamas.

"You can wear Sarah's jeans again if you like, and I'll find another shirt"

"Okay, I guess"

"Unless you want to go pick out something yourself?"

"I guess I could see if there is anything..."

Anne went upstairs to Sarah's bedroom with Calum in tow. She directed him to the girl's wardrobe and said "I'm sure you'll find something dear" She did however, give him a fresh pair of plain white panties before she left the room, her own choosing.

"She obviously doesn't want me looking in Sarah's drawers, understandable".

Calum looked at the array of girls clothing confronting him. That odd feeling growing in him again. 'What is that?' he thought to himself.

He already had the jeans of Sarah's, they were okay enough, and the panties.

After a brief look through the girl's t-shirts, he found about the only one that was plain. It was however, in pink. The boy debated with himself, but decided against it. 'Need something blue godammit', but everything else had designs on.

He settled on a blue t-shirt with a flower pattern on the front.

Once dressed and downstairs, his aunt saw him from the kitchen doorway.

"You found something then?"

"Yes"

"There's a dear" "Mind, Sarah's coming home this afternoon, you'll thank her for letting you borrow some of her clothes"

"I will"

Calum was looking forward to seeing his cousin again. They had a great friendship, and she was almost like a sister to him.

"In the meantime dear, you can help me with this cake" "can you get the bag of dried fruit out of the cupboard?"

The morning was spent baking, followed by dishwashing, too much dishwashing, and pleasant conversation.

***

The front door slammed shut, signalling Sarah's arrival home.

"That'll be her back then" Anne said to Calum.

"Love, must you always slam the door?"

"Yes, mom... hey shorty... I mean cus'"

The pair greeted each other with a hug, quickly followed by Sarah stepping back with a "whoa" "Aren't those mine!?" She looked mystified as to why her cousin should be in her clothes.

"Long story, dear" Her mom told her.

The story was shared between them, and Sarah came to understand the gravity of the situation... with a laugh.

"It's not funny" complained Calum in only half-mock offence.

"It's too funny cus, looks like I got myself a new sis!"

"Very funny, not. Look at me laughing, not"

"Are you weari... you're not weari... I'm not having my undies back after, that's for sure"

Calum shrugged, embarrassed.

"But hey, the shirt looks cute on you, sis" She teased him, ruffling his short hair.

"Maybe we can do something with this hair of yours, not too short for a little styling"

"Stop teasing the poor boy, Sarah"

"When we going shopping then, tomorrow?" asked Sarah.

"Yes, though we won't be able to get much, I'm a little short this month, and you've not got much money on you either have you dear?" Anne enquired of Calum.

"No, not really"

"We'll get at least another change of clothes for you dear, and we can work something out"

The two cousins spent the afternoon talking and mucking about, while Anne was visiting a friend across the way.

Sarah talked Calum into letting her 'style' his short hair, he agreed reluctantly to the pressure from his friend.

"Just long enough for a pixie look... I think I can pull it off..." She fussed somewhat with his hair with her tongue out, and he felt her attach a hair clip or three, he was sure.

The teasing was fun, and Calum was happy to play along with her for the fun she was having with him, and he was enjoying the attention somewhat.

That's when Sarah pulled out her iphone "Gotta get me some pics of you, sis! That's for sure!"

She chased Calum around the house, upstairs and downstairs again. That's when, without thinking, the comical chase led the pair straight out the front door, and onto the front lawn...

"Hey there, Sarah. Who's the new face?" It was Melanie, the next door neighbor.

"Oops, err, hi Melanie, how's you?" "Err, this is Cassie, my friend"

"Nice to meet you, Cassie" Melanie smiled at the young boy, who was caught like the proverbial rabbit.

"Err, hi" He said meekly, and waved a shy wave.

The pair watched Melanie disappear into her house, then they both piled into their own.

"Woah, nearly got busted there!" Exclaimed Sarah.

"What the heck? Cassie?"

"I dunno si...err, cus, it just came out" She pulled a puzzled face.

"Well I had to think of something, you know I'm not good at thinking on my feet"... "And, well, take a look at yourself, you look like a girl"

"But..."

"Take a look for yourself" Sarah led him by the shoulders to the mirror in the lobby.

Calum took a gasp as he saw in the mirror what looked like a cute girl, and was shocked.

"This... this is your fault, cus!" He complained to Sarah.

"Hey, I just did your hair, the rest is you", "heck, you look cuter in my clothes than I do, and that's sayin' somethin'"

"Yeah well, not for long... soon be out these stoopid clothes" was a pretty unconvincing reply, as he couldn't hide much the fact he quite liked what he saw in the mirror.

Not much was else was done the rest of the afternoon. Conversations were on 'other' topics, as if to avoid what had happened.

Anne came home, and when she saw the terrible two-some she asked "So what have you two been up too... Calum, what have you done to your hair?"

"It was Sarah's idea"

"You two... I don't know" she made her way through to the kitchen, calling back "Calum, you're clothes will be dry by now, want to go get changed?"

"Erm... but if I change now, what will I do tomorrow?" He shouted back.

She returned to the living room doorway "Good point, you'll need to be in your own clothes to go shopping, are you okay in what you've got for now?"

"I reckon I'll live, if I have to"

Sarah nudged him with a smirk and said quietly to him "You just like being my sis, admit it"

Calum said nothing.

"Go wash your feet, they're dirty from being out" Sarah said in a faux commanding tone

"I guess"

*****

Monday came around.

After another night in the blue floral PJ's, and Calum's pixie hair-do gone, with the aide of a scented shampoo and brush out the night before.

He had to admit, the odd feelings he had had before, he thought to himself were feelings of pleasantness, if not dare say it, excitement at his clothing options. Almost as if he was happy about his otherwise unfortunate predicament. Strange new feelings these were indeed.

"There you are sleepyhead, give sarah a shout to get up too, she's soo lazy" said Anne, as Calum appeared in the kitchen doorway, still in his pyjamas.

"Sarah! Get your backside out of your bed!"

Once breakfast was out of the way, Calum took his washed and dryed 'normal' clothes to his room to get dressed. It felt unusual to be getting back into his boys things, after this short while, as if it were right... but not right, he wasn't sure.

"You ready gang?" Anne asked.

The trio got in the car and Anne drove them to the mall, and parked far away from the entrance 'to get out quicker'. As they walked to the entrance they chattered about things and nothing.

"Got to get jeans or pants, a shirt, socks, and erm, underwear" he said to the other two, confirming his shopping goal.

"Us two will go get a coffee, if you want to go in and get what you need yourself, okay?" asked Anne, pointing to a cafe across the way.

"Okay"

"Got enough money?"

"I think so, yeah"

"See you in a little bit then"

Calum headed into the department store, and looked for the sign for menswear, located it, and headed in that direction. He found himself being distracted however by the womanswear and girlswear departments he had to traverse. "Focus" he said to himself.

The sight of the clothing though, set off that odd feeling in him, and pangs of something. He thought how different his cousin's clothes had felt, though essentially the same, just fabric, right. How odd, but the difference felt quite nice to him.

Menswear. Go in, get what you need, come out, job's a gud un'. That's the plan, and he performed it well, getting what he needed. 'At least I've got another change of clothes, won't have to borrow Sarah's things anymore'. However he felt a little sad as he said that to himself.

He re-joined Anne and Sarah at the cafe.

"Get everything?" Anne asked

"Yeah"

"Are we for the off then?" He enquired.

Sarah chirped up "You probably won't want to cus, but y'know us girls, we want to have a look around the shops ourselves first, hate to drag you along, but..." She had a little twinkle in her eye.

Calum sighed, and hoped it sounded convincing enough.

So, 'poor' Calum was dragged around umpteen shops. Sarah quipped a "that would look cute on a certain someone" at a few things, only to be sternly looked at by her mom in response.

After they returned to the car, Calum put his bags in the trunk, and the trio departed the parking lot.

"What shall we do next?" Asked Anne. "I thought we'd go for a walk by the lake, it's nice out" she said answering her own question by taking the appropriate turn in the car before a firm reply was procured.

The day passed pleasantly, they enjoyed the lakeside, and had a meal at a nearby restaurant. The trio were pleased though to get back home, tired out by the walk.

"I'm soo outta shape" said Anne with a smile

"Me too, my feet" complained Sarah

That evening when it was getting late, bed conversation came up.

"Hmm, are you wanting to borrow something of Sarah's again tonight dear? It's just a pity we couldn't afford to get you nightwear too, times are tough just now"

"I guess so" Calum responded.

"Sarah'll go and give you something to wear"

"Sarah, go take Calum and give him something to sleep in tonight, there's a dear"

The two trotted upstairs, Sarah in the lead.

Once in her bedroom, they sat on her bed and chatted a little.

"So tell me cou... sis, do you mind me calling you 'sis'?" She teased.

"Call me what you like, just call me"

"You can tell me to shut up if you like, but I must say you're different when you're 'Cassie'"

"I am, how?

"I dunno, maybe it's your feminine side?" she smiled

"It's weird, it does feel different... I mean I can't explain it, but I felt different when I was wearing your clothes"

"Oh yeah, tell me you didn't like it" she nudged him "And you must admit you looked damn cute"

"Don't tell anyone, but I think I did quite like it, it was different, kinda nice in a way" Calum was limiting the strength of his feelings for his own protection, and for his own uncertainty.

"You know you can tell me anything right, I wouldn't judge you"

"I know"

"So what are we wearing tonight, what cute little number have we got our eyes on, eh?" She resumed teasing.

"You pick something then, you're the expert"

And so she promptly picked out a pink nightie, and stuck her tongue out at him. "I think this would look adorable on you, don't you think?"

"No comment"

But he took it, and wore it to bed that night. And he slept well.

**********

To be continued...

Foreword: I thought I'd attempt to write a cheerleader themed story. Although I've seen cheerleading happen at football (soccer) matches, I don't think it's very big in the UK, however I've seen that there are UK-based sites/suppliers, so it is a thing for sure. So, I'm coming at it from a position of relative ignorance, please take that into account if you will. I'm not versed in the cultural significances that it may hold to the US reader, or the realities. My naivety may be a good or a bad thing.

*****
Daniel aka Danni: A Little Cheer Story
*****

A small town somewhere in the North-East of England.

It was a slow, dreary, weary, Tuesday afternoon, and Daniel was lying on the grass on the perimeter of the playing field, dodging a P.E. lesson with his two best male friends, James and Craig. He was pretending to be chatting with them, but his attention was only cursory. It was hard to maintain the illusion of interest in their conversation... it was something about the latest sci-fi film, or something like that. He couldn't care less really, truth be told.

What did have more of his attention, on the other hand, were the girls on the other side of the field, practising a cheerleading routine.

Among their number was Kelly... and Daniels best friend, Beth. Daniel and Beth were close friends. They'd been friends since as far back as either could remember.

He was watching them practising, and thinking absent-mindedly what it would be like to be part of the group. Yes, he wanted to join in and feel the bond of belonging as one of them, part of a female group. He was all too acutely aware of what those feelings meant, and the barriers that existed, imaginary and real.

'I like their camaraderie, I like their team spirit, I like their feminine forms, I don't like being this jealous!' He mused.

Daniel knew he was different, he figured out as much from an early age. He knew the expected societal norms, but he always knew there was more to his character or make-up than that. He wanted to join in with the girls, and be one of the girls too. That's what felt natural, but he'd learnt that it also wasn't the thing to do. He learned to keep it a secret from an early age. One learns early on in life what's expected of us behaviourally, particularly in the regard of gender roles, and aberrations are too commonly frowned upon, if not all too readily corrected.

Yes, it's a secret.

Not a complete secret though... Beth knew about this side of Daniel. The two knew each other inside out. He didn't know what he would do without at least one understanding person to confide in, she was a rock. And he, hers.

Tuesday's school day ended wearily too. Beth was waiting at the gates to meet up with Daniel, so that the two could walk home together, they always walked home together and lived just around the corner from one another. Their proximity to one another in all regards was a sort of accident of nature. Their respective parent's were friends, and both their mum's fell pregnant withing 5 months of each other. It was like it was destiny for the two to be close. They joked 'it must have been something in the water'.

"Coming round to mine's after tea?" Beth asked

"Sure"

After his tea, Daniel called around to Beth's and rang the doorbell, Beth's mum answered.

"Hi dear, how are you?"

"Fine thanks, Mrs C, how are you?"

"Good, good"

"Beth! Daniel's here!" Mrs C called upstairs to her daughter

"Come up" was the shout back

Daniel wiped his shoes on the doormat 3 times, and entered the house, and made his way upstairs to Beth's room.

"Hiya!" "Hiya!"

Beth's room was lovely to Daniel, just how he'd like to have his, though he knew he couldn't. Mainly white decor, with baby blue, and lilac accents, it was trés put-together, and distinctly feminine.

"You can help me with this homework, I hate calculus" said Beth.

"Sure, no problem" replied Daniel.

"Are you getting changed first?"

Now here was a question.

See... Beth and Daniel knew pretty much everything about each other, and Beth definitely knew about Daniels gender 'thing'. She'd sussed something long ago, the clues were there to a keen observer such as she, and when she discovered his secret, she swore not to tell a soul.

Now they had an arrangement whereby sometimes he'd change clothes into something more feminine when he was visiting with her. She had a small corner of her wardrobe set aside, with some of his things. Conveniently enough, they were similar enough in sizes to be able to swap clothes quite easily, but they both thought it would be nice if he had a few things exclusively of his own. Online shopping was certainly a godsend for such purchases.

Beth's mum or dad wandering in wasn't an issue, so far at least (touch wood), as they knew and trusted them enough to leave them to whatever they were doing in peace.

"Are you getting changed first?"

"No I don't think I will, I'm not feeling like it tonight" replied Daniel

"Why? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, just I don't feel like it I don't think"

Daniel was feeling a little subdued and wistful, probably from wanting something out of reach.

"Go on, you know you wanna, don't be a misery guts"

"Okay then" he smiled.

He looked at the small selection of his things, and picked out some plain underwear, and his favourite long blue dress. He liked that dress in particular because it covered his whole body, from the crew-neck neckline to the hem at the ankles, apart from the sleeves which were short, and the fabric was smooth and cool to the touch. Pale blue and white flowers on it were subtle, but there, for a definite feminine touch and a 'je ne sais quoi'.

He got changed behind a screen Beth had in the corner of her bedroom. It was a white painted screen which co-ordinated with the décor, and with a blue painted swan stencilled in on the front. Her own handiwork, which she was very pleased with.

"You can help me with this homework after you've finished admiring yourself, girl" Beth said cheekily.

"Righto..." "and I wasn't admiring myself"

He grabbed a white cardigan to put on over the dress as his bare arms felt a chill.

He was glad she'd insisted he got changed, as he figuratively and literally felt a whole new person. The nagging feelings of just before had dissipated.

As he helped Beth with her calculus homework, they chatted the while. He was good at maths but didn't really enjoy it as a subject. English was more his thing.

Time passed too quickly, and it was soon time to be getting ready to go home. They both disliked it, but time's march is inevitable. Danni straightened his dress out, and went behind the screen to get changed. He re-appeared as dreary Daniel, in a t-shirt and jeans, and placed his female clothing back in the wardrobe, his section, neatly folded.

The pair hugged and said their g'night's.

That night Daniel lay in his bed, playing in his head 'Dire Straits - Romeo and Juliet'. I'm just a romantic I guess... He was thinking to himself of Kelly... and in his imagination he was serenading her. He had a vivid imagination while lying in bed, keeping himself awake at nights. To him, she was perfect. He pictured her and him on a beach at sunset... sharing kisses as the sun kissed the sea. Sigh.

He looked at his alarm clock, then at the light creeping around the curtains... 'Jeez, soon be time to get up and I've still not gotten to sleep' he reprimanded himself.

*****

The next days were uneventful, boring really. Though that Thursday night was to be eventful. Beth had invited Daniel around to hers that evening.

Daniel arrived at the front door at approximately 7pm as arranged, and rang the doorbell. He was curious about something Beth had said earlier in the day, which was that she had a surprise for him.

"Hi dear, how are you?"

"Fine thanks, Mrs C, how are you?"

"Good good"

"Beth! Daniel's here!" Mrs C called upstairs to her daughter

"Come up" was the shout back

Daniel wiped his shoes on the doormat 3 times, and entered the proferred door, and made his way up the familiar stairway, meeting Beth at her bedroom door. She was standing with her door closed behind her, and whispered 'Hiya' to him so as the parent's downstairs couldn't hear.

"What? Is everything okay?" enquired Daniel, whispering back.

"Well... you know that I know how you feel about being on the cheer team, and there's nothing I can do about that I'm afraid, but..."

"Yes... what?"

"Well I reckoned, next best thing, we could play pretend you're on the team... So..."

She opened her bedroom door and ushered Daniel in.

"So I thought, why not? It might be fun"

Daniel followed her hand gesture and his eyes were drawn to the uniform that was laid out on Beth's bed.

"Sorry for the drama, but I wanted to set the scene!"

"My spare uniform, it'll fit you"

"Wow, I'm not sure, Beth" said Daniel, thoughts rushing.

"Bad idea?"

"No not that... are you sure it's okay?"

"Of course, Danni"

"Well, it could be fun"

"That's the spirit!" Beth grinned.

The two walked over to the edge of the bed where Beth's spare uniform was laid out.

"Are you getting changed too?" asked Daniel.

"Sure, I'll get changed at the same time as you"

"Okay then"

Beth picked up the garments and laid them on top of a chest of drawers situated near the painted screen.

"Here you go, you get into these things, and I'll change over there, okay?"

"Okay"

Daniel went to his little stash in the wardrobe, and picked out fresh underwear for himself, and then slipped behind the screen.

As he undressed he looked at the uniform, and thought of all the times he'd admired the girls on the team wearing the same thing, and a tingle went up his spine.

He pulled on the knickers he'd selected, and adjusted himself politely, then put on his bra. Back to front then slide it around. He was a slender 32b, with some padding.

'What goes on first...' he thought, of course, and picked up the shorts off the top of the pile. They were blue short shorts, to maintain modesty, he knew that. He slid them on, and pulled them up to his waist and smoothed them down.

Then the top. It was a white, cropped, long-sleeved top. He slid his arms through the sleeves, and noted how close-fitting they were and the fabric clung, stretching to give a little, and then pulled the rest over his head. He pulled it down over his bust, with a little twist. It fitted neatly, and felt nice.

Then he reached over and got the skirt. It was a blue straight skirt with white trim and a notch detail on the front left. He unfastened it, and placed his feet into it, and slid it up over his legs until the waistband was situated around his waist. And fastened it, it was a pretty snug fit, but do-able.

Last thing was the shell top, which was blue and white, and made of a similar fabric to the skirt. He pulled it on over his head, and pulled it down, it fit him pretty nicely.

He straightened himself out a bit until he thought he was looking satisfactory.

"Are you changed yet?" he called out to Beth.

"Just a mo..."

A minute or two later Beth called back...

"Okay I'm ready, are you?"

"Yes" he replied and stepped out from behind the screen.

Beth grinned, and Daniel felt a little shy, but not too much.

"You look great, Danni... how do you feel?"

"It feels funny, but really good I think, it's really smart"

"It is isn't it!" replied Beth.

"Great!"

"Now, let me show you a couple cool moves" Beth motioned the pair towards the full length mirror situated beside her dresser table "First, you'll need these..."

Beth walked over to her cupboard, and produced a pair of pom's "these... essential things" she handed them to Danni.

Positioned in front of the mirror, Beth walked Danni through a few simple steps and basic movements.

"You're a natural, and you look so cute, it really suits you... I'm quite jealous actually" she poked Danni in the side.

"It's a shame you can't join us on the team, I'm sure you'd fit in, well if it wasn't for, you know"

"I know" Danni shrugged in a downbeat manner.

The two mucked about and chatted for a little while, and all too soon enough it was time to get changed back.

"Sigh, I suppose".

*****

The next week, Monday lunchtime, Beth and Daniel were talking alone.

"Y'know Daniel, I was thinking about it, and I think I know a way we can wangle you onto the cheer team, just for a go like"

"Oh? Really? How?"

"Well... we could play it like you lost a bet, and you have to agree to join in for a game 'as punishment'" "Or, it was a dare, I dared that you'd never do it" "But you'd have to pretend like you hate it I think, to keep appearances like"

"Hmm... I'm not sure about that" Daniel pondered.

"Was just a thought, think about it"

"I will"

That evening Daniel thought about what Beth had suggested, laid on his bed listening to music. It did seem an enticing ruse.

"What if... hmm no, but then again... but it could be so much fun... what about Kelly, she'd be there" "I'd die if she found out I wasn't forced into it, about me..." "I'm being stupid... it does sound fantastic though, just imagine..." "I couldn't... could I? "It could just work, if we did it right, it could".

The next day, at lunchtime, the two friends met-up again.

"I was thinking about what you said yesterday" said Daniel to Beth.

"About my idea?"

"Yeah" "Well, do you think it would work?"

"I think it just might you know"

"What would we say, it was a bet?" enquired Daniel

"We could say that, yes"

"What sort of bet though, it has to be plausible"

"We could say we had a race" "You teased me that cheer wasn't a sport and you're fitter than me, something like that, maybe"

"We could, though you know I can run faster than you anyway, and it's not a sport..." teased Daniel, who received a shove as a result.

"Well, you're the greatest smoothest cyclist"

The pair laughed. That was Daniels excuse, if anyone was to notice he didn't have hair on his legs, that he shaved them for his cycling, 'it's a cyclist thing, don't you know'. Well it's only half a lie, nobody else need know the bigger half.

The two discussed it further, before the bell rang. It did seem a shame that such subterfuge and intrigue was necessary, but thus was the situation.

"Maths next... sigh" groaned Beth.

"I've got art, and you know I can't draw to save myself... and Mr Walker's annoying" replied Daniel.

*****

*
Plan's a go-go
*

Beth and Daniel met up at Beth's house that Tuesday evening.

"So it's on then?" asked Daniel.

"Yeppers, it's looking like it, you're not having second thoughts about it are you?"

"Of course"

"Well it's too late now, I've arranged it with the others'"

Beth had told a couple of friends from the cheer team that she'd bet with Daniel, and that he'd lost. She'd beaten him in a sprint race. As he'd been dismissive of the girls' and cheerleading as a whole, she had thought it would be funny, and appropriate, if he had to join them for a short half-time routine at a football game in a few weeks time. And that she hadn't thought through the implications prior, but she had it worked out now. If only the others agreed first.

Then the question of a boy in the team arose, 'how would that work?'. Beth had informed them that he'd wear her spare uniform, and she'd thought about all that stuff. He'd fit in her spare, and she'd give him a proper make-over... 'don't worry, you wouldn't know it wasn't your long lost sister!'.

This whole thing was apparently a bit weird to a couple of the girls, but they were okay, and to the rest there was amusement, teamed with a playful sense of 'we'll show him'.

"I hope it's not going to be vengeance time?" asked Daniel, questioningly, and a bit apprehensively.

"No no, it's all in good fun, I was careful to frame it right".

The two discussed how it was going to work. Beth was going to teach Daniel the moves they were going to be doing. It was only a brief routine. Half-time football show consists of 'we run on, do a quick routine, and run off, it's all over in 10 minutes'.

"You'll walk it" Beth re-assured.

"You'll have to come to a couple of our practices, to learn what to do with the others." "Don't worry, it's simple enough, you won't have a starring role" "You've come to watch us a few times before, you'll already know what to do I bet".

"Anyway, nobody appreciates us, there's only a few people there, and they're busy on their phones at half-time, or wondering what to have for tea". "It's a travesty really, such a travesty" Beth held the back of her hand to her forehead and feigned indignation.

That night Daniel lay in bed, unable to sleep again, with wandering thoughts in his mind. How will he act in front of the others... be confident, that's it, confidence. And if you don't have confidence, then 'fake it until you make it'. What's Kelly going to be like, he wondered. Him almost like an intruder in the group, though he wasn't intruding, they'd agreed to this. Confidence.

He played music around in his mind, one lyric appealed to him - "If you were a season you would be in bloom, I wish I had good reason to see you soon".

*****

As planned, Daniel met Beth at her house the next evening. The two were to walk from there to the sports centre where the girls practised for an hour or so. He was attired in his shorts, t-shirt, and training shoes (there was no need to look passable for practice), Beth was similarly attired in female versions.

"Hiya" said Daniel

"Hiya... ready Freddy?"

"Ready as ever" was Daniel's reply

"Let's do it! Positive mental attitude!" enthused Beth

They arrived at the sports centre soon enough, and the two signed-in at the reception, and Beth led Daniel through a corridor to the hall where practice was held. Daniel could hear the chatter from the far end of the corridor, and his stomach turned knots. He reminded himself 'be brave' and 'fake it until you make it', though his stomach was telling him different.

Beth greeted her friends cheerily, and introduced the loser of the bet. As had been planned, he looked rather like he didn't want to be there, but was only there as a good sport. It wasn't hard to play the part though, as he was nervous enough to be sure it showed on his face. But the story had to be adhered to. That he was a good sport, and that 'if a job's worth doing...'.

After the introductions, and some friendly banter, the group settled into getting some work done. They guided Daniel in some basic steps that he was privately already familiar with, and did a good enough job that a couple of the girls commented that he was a natural and 'sure you haven't done this before?'. A question answered with a sheepish denial.

One keen observer noticed his legs were shaved, and enquired if he was practising shaving in readiness too. To which he replied that he was a keen cyclist, and it was a cycling thing... don't you know. The answer sufficed, and she learnt something new.

Time past too quickly. By the time Daniel was settling in and relaxed enough to enjoy things, it was time to wind things down. Lots of friendly banter and goodbye's were exchanged, and Daniel and Beth departed together.

"That went well I think, don't you think?" asked Beth

"Yeah... it was fun actually, I was starting to enjoy it"

"I knew would, I knew you'd fit in, they're a good bunch" "And notice you didn't get too much stick, I warned them not to milk it"

"Thanks Beth" Daniel smiled

Next practice was Friday evening, same time, same place. Though when they said practice, most of the time was spent chatting and messing about, as Daniel found out to his amusement.

"More of a social get-together isn't it" he joked to Beth

"Shh... don't let on" was the reply

The plan was that they'd meet together again next week, Wednesday and Friday evenings. And that that following Sunday was a football game that he'd be participating in the half-time routine in. That was the plan.

Further, he was to go to Beth's house that Sunday morning to get changed into their uniforms, and do make-up and get ready. Then they'd walk the 5 mins to the football park where the match was, meeting the other girls there. This would be do-able, and Beth's parents were due to be out of the house all morning visiting relatives. This allowed the two to sneak out without the parents catching them and recognising Daniel/Danni. That would cause a whole world of problems.

The intervening days dragged slowly, and much of Daniel's attention was on what was going to happen, how fun it could be, or how badly it could go wrong. Too much time to think is a bad thing, for sure.

Sunday morning came around soon enough, and Daniel was in his bedroom, just out of the shower, when he got a text from Beth. The text caused alarm and increased anxiety immediately, and was followed a minute later with a call from Beth. Disaster had struck, Beth's parents weren't going visiting relatives after all, they had changed their plans last minute.

"What are we going to do now? They can't see me, I'm not 'that' passable that they wouldn't know it's me!?"

"I know, I know... I'm thinking..." Beth replied

"How about... I have an idea... I'll get back to you in a few minutes, got to make a call" Beth added

Daniel wondered what her idea was, and who she was calling now, he was soon to find out, and if he thought his stomach did all sorts of turns before, now there was worse to come.

"Danni?" Beth had called him back on his phone

"Yes?"

"I've got a solution, but I'm not sure how you'll like it"

"I don't know, what is it?" Daniel was apprehensive at the words and tone

"Well we can still do this... if we go round to Kelly's house and get changed there, her parents are out and she said she's cool with it"

There was a pause.

"Shit... I don't know about that, you know how I feel"

"I know Danni, but it's our only option if we want to do this, and she really is cool about it, you can do it, I know you can"

"Can I call you back, I need to think about this" said Daniel

"Sure, okay, but we don't have long"

Inner turmoil struck hard. Oh what a tangled web we weave... The best laid schemes of mice and men... 'Oh shut up' he told himself. Daniel thought, he had to go with the change of plan, he wasn't going to pull out now. Be brave, be a man! He called Beth back.

"Okay, let's do it then"

"Good, you know it'll be good, we'll have fun, you'll see"

Daniel made his way round to Beth's house and rang the doorbell.

"Hi Daniel!"

"Hi Mrs C!"

"She's just coming" "How are you?"

"I'm fine thanks Mrs C, you?"

"Good, good"

"Well you two have fun!" Beth's mum said as the two left together.

"Got everything?" asked Daniel

"I sure do, we'll have a blast, you'll see"

The two arrived at Kelly's house, and Daniel was filled with trepidation, his stomach was turning again, and his heart beating fast... 'be strong', 'fake it until you make it'.

"Hi Kelly!" chimed Beth as Kelly answered the door

"Hey you two!" she smiled

"Well? All clear?" whispered Beth

"All clear" was the reply "You know you really are a great sport doing this Daniel, most guys would have backed out, but not you" "I'm impressed" Kelly smiled at him

"Erm... thanks" Daniel smiled back nervously

"I thought you can get changed in the bathroom if that's okay, you'll have privacy there, while us girls get changed in my room"

"Yeah... erm... okay"

Kelly led the way upstairs to her bedroom. As they entered Daniel took in the scene, Kelly's room was decorated even more nicely than Beth's. White decor mainly, with lots of pink accents. He admired it inwardly. Beth placed her bag down on the pink carpeted bedroom floor, and proceeded to take out her's and Daniels uniforms. Well, this was it.

"Here you go Daniel, the bathroom's just on the left if you want to go through and get changed"

"Sure... okay" he said, taking the items gingerly from Beth's hands, blushing slightly at the underwear on top of the uniform and what Kelly must be thinking.

"Do you know how everything goes on?" enquired Kelly

"Yes, we did a trial run the other day" Beth replied for Daniel

"Oh good, such a trooper"

Daniel took his things through to the bathroom, and locked the door behind himself. 'Deep breaths' he told himself. He remembered the first time he'd tried the uniform on, those short weeks ago. And repeated the process again, he took his time making sure everything was just right and he was presentable. 'Here goes nothing' he said to himself, pulling at the hem of his skirt and straightening it, before unlocking the bathroom door and stepping out. He crossed the landing over to Kelly's bedroom door.

"Are you two ready? Can I come through yet?"

"Give us a minute..."

"Okay, you can come through now"

He thought he heard Kelly saying something along the lines of she was dying to see what he looked like. He braced himself and peered round the half-open bedroom door.

"Don't just stand there dopey" said Beth "Come in"

He entered rather shyly, though as confidently as he could. There they were, the three of them, looking at each other, and Beth laughed a little.

"You look so nervous, chin up Daniel, it'll be okay"

Daniel smiled.

"We'll have to get our make-up done now, and I'll do yours and your hair Daniel" said Beth "I wonder what we can do with you"

She pretended like she wasn't sure what to do. On the contrary, the two of them had experimented with styles and looks plenty of times, and Daniel knew how to do his/her own make-up and hair. But, now was not the time for such honesty. Pretences had to be maintained.

Daniel sat down on a chair beside a dressing table, at Beth's behest.

"What to do, what to do" she feigned ignorance

Kelly looked on observantly.

"Your hairs just long enough to do something nice with, and I'm glad you washed and conditioned like I suggested" "Here, I'm sure I can work wonders with you".

And she did work wonders, soon Daniel was pretty unrecognisable as his former self, and to the casual observer looked like a girl, very passably so.

"He has got great eyelashes" remarked Kelly "I wish mine were like that" "And the bone structure"

"I know, huh" said Beth "He makes a pretty convincing girl, I did tell you"

At that moment Kelly's face lit up like a light bulb had gone off above her head.

"Ooh! Ooh! I know..."

"What?" Daniel and Beth replied together

"Well I just thought, we can't call you Daniel, not looking like that, so how about... Danni!!!"

"That's a brilliant idea Kelly!" exclaimed Beth, looking at Daniel, the pair trying to stop from laughing.

"Rub it in why don't you" was Danni's reply, trying to look po-faced, and a grudging sport.

"Danni it is then!" said Beth, nodding approvingly.

"We all ready to go then? Don't want to be late"

"Ready Freddy"

The three made sure they were looking their best, and left Kelly's house for the park, a good ten minutes walk away. They chatted along the way, the two other girls checking that Danni knew what to do, and what was expected.

Upon arrival at the park they met-up with the rest of the group, and with amongst the greetings were astonished comments about Daniel's transformation.

"You weren't kidding when you said you'd give him a good makeover" was one girl's comment

"I told you, didn't I, have a little faith" replied Beth

Danni wasn't sure where to look at times, but tried to be relaxed as much as she could, like how she was with the other girls during their practice get-togethers.

They watched a boring football match ensue, chattering and sharing tit-bits of gossip all the while.

There was a small spectatorship, mainly of friends and family of the players, a few family of the girls', and a few passers-by, oh, and one man and his dog.

They got ready for action when it got nearer the time, and when the whistle blew for half-time they readied to go onto the pitch and do their show for the spectators and assembled adoring masses.

All went well, and all looked and performed their parts with practised ease, including the new girl that nobody paid much attention to. She performed her role admirably.

Then almost as soon as it had begun, their time was up, and they departed the field for the sidelines again.

"Told you nobody appreciates us here" said Beth, mock indignation on her face again.

"You did really well!" was heard from several of the team, directed at Danni.

"You did really well Danni, you were great!" chirped Kelly.

"Yes, you're a natural, you'd be an asset to the team, really... it's a pity you couldn't join in more often!" was one girls' comment.

Beth looked at Danni with a smile.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking...?"