December 2021 Christmas Holidays Story Contest Entry

Christmas Canon

I enjoyed working, more than being anywhere else—other than my quarterly trip to Nashville—and if the rent in the only apartment complex in town wasn’t twice what I made in a month and if it didn’t have a cockroach issue three hundred and sixty-two point five days, I move out of the shadow of my parents and start again. However, it had never been in the cards for me to win the Tennessee Lottery.
“There’s always Mr. Thomas’ grandson,” I thought to myself as I pulled my motorcycle into the driveway, past my parent’s SUV and another mid-size car with rental plates and into the carport. It was Seth’s 2016 Nakaruru and he had deliberately given me a key before he deployed on what was his final mission:

“Two things,” he said as he cinched up his bag.
“What?”
“Three, actually.”
“Okay.” I replied as I laughed a little at the pink in his hair. He was so going to be reprimanded by a high-ranker or something.
“One, don’t let Adam boss you around. It’s not his house.”
I bit my lip but nodded. Seth reached into his pocket.
“Two, if my ass is toasted, you, Nikki, you will take this key and call my baby your own.”
“Your bike? Seriously?”
“Only if I’m like splattered all over the middle east. Because I swear that even if I’m a quadriplegic, if I can at least turn it on, I will ride it when I get back.”
He dropped the key in my hand and my fingers curled around it. I then looked at his face—he showed no emotion. I guess that was our family way—no visible emotions—but he could see that I was failing in the “stiff upper lip” department and any make-up I had on was all over my face.
“Come here,” he said as he dropped his bag to hug me.
Had I known it would be the last time, I would never have let him go.
“Lastly, always be who you are, Nikki,”
“I will, Seth, thank you."

Two days after we received the call form the Department of Defense, mom demanded that I sell the motorcycle and I told her--three hours later, after I had gained my composure once again about possibly losing a piece of my brother’s memory, I informed her that it was now my bike and I held the key out like it was an academy award.

The bike was in mint condition as Seth had it stored in a climate-controlled warehouse. The maroon finish had an almost pink look in the light and there was a moment that I thought he had either bought it for me specifically, to annoy mom and dad or, perhaps most likely, to piss-off Adam. I kept it in pristine condition the best I could, nearly crushing my leg when I went down, placing myself between the bike and road. In hindsight, Seth would have lightly berated like a drill sergeant, but he would have also said: “it’s just a tool. A sexy and powerful tool, but, still.”

“Nikki?” Mom asked as I opened the side door.
“Yes, mom.”
“Hey!” A voice yelled and a long shadow loomed in from the kitchen. Daniel took a step into the hallway, and it took me a moment to recognize him as he had a beard that would rival the Robertson clan.
“Daniel, good to see you,” I replied as I walked closer. I was about to shake his hand but instead, he leaned in, grabbed me around the waist and hoisted me off the floor.
“Hey, Lena!”
“Yes, Danny” a female voice asked.
“Come here. No wait, I’ll bring her to you.”
Daniel swung me up—like I was still eight or something—and then lowered me down in front of a very long and tall woman, Lena.
“So, you’re the one I hear so much about?”
“Depends on what you’ve heard,” I replied as I unzipped my jacket in order to adjust everything I had in my inside pockets, which promptly fell out and onto the floor.
Lena kneeled to help and whispered to me: “I’ve heard you got a mean right hook.”
I wasn’t sure how to answer so I just shrugged my shoulders as we continued to pick up my pens, server wallet and phone.
“Danny, you said you’d take me Cracker Barrel.”
“I’ll take you anywhere want to go, as long as it doesn’t rhyme with Barfu—”
“Daniel Lee Armitage!” Mom warned as she lightly slapped his wrist with a wooden spoon.

Lena handed me my things. I gave the sign of “one second” and quickly moved down the hallway to my room. I almost slammed the door in my rush to close and lock it. As much as I wanted to see my brother and ask when he decided to go lumberjack I also knew that if Daniel was there then it was only going to be a matter of time before Adam arrived. Maybe I could just live at the restaurant for the week.
I asked—only once—why Adam didn’t stay in a hotel room? I mean, he could get a room on his name alone: he had saved Mr. Thomas from drowning after a bad attempt at ice skating. Reverend Al was almost to give his own version of last rites when Adam jumped into the water and not only saved Mr. Thomas, but also one of his grandsons. After that, Adam could do know wrong; Daniel was expected to follow in his footsteps, Seth was to look up to him, and I was to sit with my eyes aglow at the gift that was my older brother. So, yeah, he could have whatever he wanted from the town so, why not stay for a week at the Drury Inn?
Dad shot back: “We don’t force family to live in isolation!”
Funny, because that’s what happened to me when Adam came home, isolation.
Also, the hotel was next to my job.

Christmas Canon By Trans-Siberian Orchestra

December 2021 Christmas Holidays Story Contest Entry

O Come, All Ye Faithful

“We moved from Seattle to Vaugh last year.”
“Where’s that?” Mom asked as she passed a plate of biscuits to Danny. “You always say you’re in Seattle.”
“To avoid the very same question you just asked, Ma. It makes the conversation easier. I mean, like it was easier telling people there I was from Memphis.”
Dad gave a low, guttural, --no idea how it can be spelled out other than--grumble at the mention of Memphis.
“We like it. The house has a huge window where you see nothing but trees and bears.”
“You could have lived in the Smokies for that, Dan,” Dad replied.
“It’s more than trees and the wildlife, Dad. It’s the grandeur of living in the great state of Washington.”
Dad grumbled again. He had never, not once, ever cared about leaving the state of Tennessee, or at least the tri-state area. He was fine with Adam leaving for the missionary field, and he tolerated Seth joining the armed service. He never understood Danny’s hobo way of going across the country to work at a coffee shop.
“So, you quit working for that coffee place to chopping trees?”
“Yes. The trees don’t complain too much.”
Dad just nodded and then took another bite of roast.
Lena and mom nodded along with pretty much everything Danny said as he went over how he met Lena.
“So, when are you planning your wedding?” Mom asked.
“Haven’t thought about it. It’s not really on our minds.”
Mom and Dad dropped their silverware. I, however, kept eating.
You could have sworn mom was a ghost: “Wh-what?” She stammered.
“No, it’s on our minds, Ma, but we haven’t found the time or place or…”
“Danny’s trying to say that we wanted you to come up to Vaugh, but didn’t know if you could.”
“Then you can have one here,” Dad said as he picked up his fork and knife.
“Yes, oh, that would be so…so sweet,” Mom exclaimed. Sweet was Mom’s catch-all phrase. It could be used in place of anything or as any part of speech.
“What do you think, Lena?”
Lena looked at me from across the table. “Will you be my maiden of honor?”
Everyone else then looked at me.
The third time in my life when I had a whole room starting intently at me. The second time was when I dropped two trays of ribs on to Mr. Johnny’s feet.
“Umm, sure,” I replied.
Mom clapped her hands, Lena smiled, Danny nodded and Dad…Dad… well it was a cross between indigestion and “meh, I’m okay with it.”
Maybe big news would be contagious and since my life was nowhere newsworthy, it would be a quiet week with everyone talking about wedding plans and all.
“We need to take you shopping for a dress,” Mom sprung this on me as I was brushing my teeth.
I was pretty much a captive audience.
“I know you don’t like frilly dresses.”
Actually, this was a half truth. I did like frilly dresses, but only ones I chose to wear, not ones that were decreed on me. Judging by mom’s attitude, Lena and Danny gave her the keys to the kingdom of their wedding bliss. Which, for me, meant trying on dresses that either did not fit my body or ones that did but made me want to bludgeon myself to death.
Any wedding day I had would never be in the state of Tennessee nor would it require dresses. Everyone would be free to wear whatever made them happy because that’s what I was going to do.
“Do you work tomorrow?”
I nodded as I continued to brush my teeth. My molars were either going to be clean or my gums would start bleeding.
“I’m thinking a traditional country theme. Oh, we all come out with our hair in some sweet curls ”
I was close to swallowing a mouthful of toothpaste and spit, causing me almost throw up.
“Yes, and in long, old-fashion dresses and the men folk…ah listen to me saying it like it’s really back in time…They’re in suits that proudly adhere to being from the south.”
“What would Danny and Lena say to that?” I asked while still looking down at the sink—my face splattered with a white and blue mess. Mom was either oblivious or didn’t care.
“I am going to and find out now. Ooh, I’m so excited. Wipe your face, Nicole.”
She then left the bathroom—and the door wide open.

I walked into the kitchen in my night clothes which consisted of a tie-dye t-shirt and pajama pants.
Mom and Lena had several bridal magazines strewn across the table and both were intently looking at them. I had to wonder if she had a stack of them hidden away for such an occasion. Adam had gotten married in Texas, much to the chagrin of Dad. I had no intention of getting married anytime soon so I guess she pinned her hopes on Danny.
“What do you think of this, Nikki?” Lena asked as she pointed at something one would see Laura Ingalls Wilder wear.
“It’s nice,” I replied.
“I think so too” Lena answered but she shook her head—Mom was too engrossed in another magazine to look up.
“It may be too cold to wear, if you’re doing this outside.”
“Mrs. Armitage?”
“Yes, oh how about this?” Mom spun toward us and showed a picture of a bride and groom that looked like they just went two-point seven seconds on a bull named “Fu-Man-Chu” and were then trampled in the mud.
“That’s a lot of brown,” I whispered.
“Those boots look uncomfortable,” Lena stated.
“But the dress…hmm, do you think a leather dress is too much?”
“Danny wouldn’t mind at all. We have a lot of leather…things.”
I took a step back and tried to not visualize anything.
It was too late for mom.

I left the kitchen—not wanting to talk about chafing to any part of anyone’s body—especially not my brother’s. I walked down the hallway and saw the light in my room was on…which meant the door was wide open. I accelerated, hoping to not see Dad thumbing around—again—asking what such and such was about. Instead, Danny was in the middle of the room looking at the posters and artwork all over.
“It’s different now, more color. Less brown”
“Yeah,” I replied as I breathed half a sigh.
“It’s a bit more, pink.”
I nodded as Danny stepped closer to the wall. “I see you fixed the hole.”
“Mr. Johnny did, actually.”
“He’s still alive?”
“I see him every morning.”
“That was quite a punch.”
“Yes. Yes, it was,” I answered as Danny stepped back and looked at my dresser that was once his but had been re-painted and had a mirror added.
“I was going to take this with me…if I could have lugged it.”
“You can take it if you want to.”
“No, Nikki, I couldn’t do that to you.”
“Thank you,” I replied as I shuffled into my room and stood near my bed.
“How are you doing here?”
“I’m okay.”
“No one giving you any trouble?”
“Not since before graduation.”
“Ah,” Danny replied as he took a hanger with one of my dresses on it. “This looks good.”
“It’s comfortable.”
“Seeing anybody?”
“No.”
“You should.”
“Maybe I should move to Washington as well?”
“You’re welcome to come back with us.”
“Are you being serious?” I asked as I took the dress from him and placed it back into the closet.
“Well, yeah, I mean, I hate to see you not do anything with yourself here, Nicole. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure you love Mom and Dad and your work, but are you really happy here?”
I turned to face Danny, trying to see if his sincerity hid some form of prank, some inner sarcasm—as he was known for it.
“No,” I whispered.

O Come, All Ye Faithful -Trans-Siberian Orchestra

December 2021 Christmas Holidays Story Contest Entry

The World That She Sees

“I hear your brother’s in town.” Mr. Johnny said as I placed a bowl of cornbread rolls down on the table.
“The one who saved your drowning butt?” Reverend Al glanced at Mr. Thomas as his hands reached in and he grabbed two rolls.
“No,” Mr Johnny said he shook his head, “He’s the one who jumped our car after we…went for doughnuts.”
“Ah, the doughnut run,” Mr. Thomas mused.
“Special for today are the waffles,” I replied.
“So, he’s planning a wedding?”
“Mmm-hmm, I replied as I moved strands of hair out of my face. I had woken up early due to a light snowfall and still didn’t have time to do anything with my hair. My helmet completed my masterpiece of Capelli Arruffati.
“Your brother gonna officiate? I’ll take five waffles and stack’em high”
“Most likely. Butter? Syrup?”
“Lay it on me.”
“Yes sir, Mr. Thomas.”
“That grandkid you’ve been yapping about come in yet?” Mr. Johnny asked through a bite of cornbread.
“I assume he’s left his dungeon in Nashville,” Reverend Al said as he looked at Mr. Thomas.
“Oh yeah, Nikki, he is on his way and I told him to come straight here with the biggest bouquet of roses he could possibly find.”
“How he paying for flowers as a college kid?”
“He has some money, Tony. Money for the important things,” Mr. Thomas looked at me with a wink.
“You may have a double wedding,” Mr Johnny said and then took a sip of coffee.
“I’m already a maiden of honor in one wedding.”
“And if I have to change some state laws, Nikki, you’ll be a bride in this state too.”
“Thank you, Mr. Thomas. Mr. Johnny, Reverend, did you want anything?”
Mr Johnny took another roll and then pointed to the empty bowl.
“More rolls. Yes sir.”

I grabbed the bowl and looked out the window at the now steady falling snow. It was going to be Hell getting home. My bike was actually inside the restaurant’s storage area but would I be able to get it out and get home? Maybe it was best to just live at my job to avoid the inevitable arrival of Adam’s family which consisted of his wife Karen Anne and their kids, James and Amelia. I didn’t really want to know what would happen once they knocked on the front door of the house and then started talking with mom and Dad, Danny and Lena.
I was happy to just be at work with the crowded dining room.
Spilled tea? No problem.
Kids flinging mashed potatoes? Like a Bob Ross painting.
Being at work for ten hours? Cake walk, my friend.

By two o’clock that afternoon, management called all of the servers to the nearly empty dining room.
“The snow is not going to let up, so we’re planning to close at three. We’re going to leave the middle section open but close out the sides for the day.”
There were some moans about the snow and about leaving and not leaving. I just went on my way to start cleaning up my section. I would occasionally look out the window to see the drifts build up.
“Yeah, she’s over there. Nikki!”

I looked back to see a young man, perhaps my age standing next to Miriam, our hostess. He held onto a bouquet of flowers as he walked toward me. Miriam pointed at him and nodded her head.
I gave a light smile to acknowledge her and hoped that the guy didn’t completely think it was all for him.
“Are you Nicole Armitage?”
Since we were in a public place with cameras, I felt safe enough to answer him. “Yes.”
“Great. I’m Garrett Thomas,” he replied. “These are for you.”
He handed the flowers to me. They were a mix of multi-colored roses, in a blue, pink and white blooms.
“Thank you, Garrett, umm, I kind of don’t know what to say.”
“Too much too soon? My grandfather always says to go out and make an impression.”
“And he has done that. I’ve heard a lot about you, Garrett.”
“A lot of it is hyperbole, I assure you.”
We both avoided eye contact up until that moment.
“So, I was just wondering if you wanted to spend some time, you know, I mean, I don’t want to say, date, because that carries so much baggage but—Yes, a date with my family. I want to invite you to our Christmas party tomorrow night.”
“Sure,” I replied with a wider smile—anything to get away from my family.
“Thank you. We can handle the logistics tomorrow, I suppose. I’ll let you get back to work.”
I nodded as I walked over to the broom, I was going to pick up earlier.
“Do you prefer Nikki or Nicole?”
I spun around to answer his question. “Anything but Nick,”
“Nicole it is,” he replied as he took a step back—nearly missing a busboy’s loaded tub of dishes—and then left into the gift shop.
Miriam walked over and took the flowers from my hand.
“Was that Mr. Thomas’ grandson?”
“You mean you didn’t know?”
“Honey, I just noticed he looked nice and asked about you.”
“He does look cute.” I had to wonder if he was still in the shop area or had left the store.
“Must get it from his grandfather.”
“Miriam?”
“I’m into older men, I’ll admit it. Put in a good word for me, okay?”
“Okay.”
“I’ll put these in a pitcher for now.”
“Thank you.”

True to their word, an hour later the lights dimmed, and we closed early. The snow had stopped falling but it was blowing around enough that one couldn’t tell. I went to the breakroom and got my gear to go outside.
I would have to come back for the flowers, hopefully they wouldn’t die.
Miriam stormed into the room and pointed a finger at me.
“Don’t you dare tell me you’re riding that death machine in the snow, Miss Evel Knievel.”
“Can’t walk home.”
“And I’m not going to hear you crashed yourself on the street and busted up that face of yours on the gravel.”
“It would make for a great ‘Instagram.”
“Just get your things. I’ll take the flowers, and you meet me out front.”
I nodded as Miriam grabbed the pitcher. Then, I grabbed my jacket, gloves, and helmet.

We walked into the now darkened dining area illuminated only by the dying light of the day reflecting off the snow.
“Now, my car’s kind of full a lot of crap right now, so, I have a better ride for you.”
“Better ride?’ I asked as Miriam opened the front door to reveal a snow-blown Garrett.
"Remember that good word for me, aight?" Miriam whispered.

The World That She Sees By Trans-Siberian Orchestra

December 2021 Christmas Holidays Story Contest Entry

Wizards in Winter

The town had an eerie silence as Garrett placed my things on the small rear of his truck. It was a new model—like it had just been purchased, in fact, the lack of a real license plate and the drive-out tag in the rear window kind of sealed that deal.
Garret held the door for me to get in and handed the bouquet to me after I sat down.
He then carefully closed the door and walked around the front. The vehicle then started up.
“I love remote starts,” he said as he closed the door. “That and the horn when I’m trying to remember where I parked.”
“It’s nice.”
“Thank you. So, you normally ride a motorcycle in this weather?”
“Only if Miriam doesn’t stop me. But, to be truthful, I didn’t really want to brave the trip home.”
“Well, I am happy to drive you home or wherever you would like to go.”
“Not a lot open now.”
“Yeah,” he replied as he backed up and we drove out of the parking lot and onto the nearly deserted street. “Do you like gas station chicken?”
“KFC?”
“Oh, so you know about the history?”
“I worked at that place,” I said as we passed by a darkened restaurant with a statue of Coronal Sanders decked out like Santa Claus.
“I’ve had to stop at a lot of hole in the wall places while driving back.”
“This town is a hole in the wall,” I mused.
“True. My uncle wants to turn things around and bring in bigger companies but grandpa won’t let him.”
“Won’t let him?”
“There’s something in the town charter that won’t allow for something or other. It’s more family politics then anything real.”
“I know all about family politics,” I said as I looked out the window. We were driving at a slow pace due to the road conditions and the possibility that this brand new truck would take a nasty slide into an embankment or into a lake.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Okay,” I was very close to bailing out of a moving vehicle.
“Did your brother really pull my grandfather out of the lake?”
“Yep.”
“And before that he knocked a door off its hinges during a basketball game?”
“Different brother.”
“Wow…I always thought those were just grandads’s wild stories. He once told me about this time he toilet-papered the park and had this girl drive him away before the police arrived.
“That would be me,” I replied with a smirk.
“I am driving with a legend.”
“I really had no idea what they were doing until they popped the trunk and took out a lot of multi-colored rolls. I became the getaway driver after that.” I replied as I felt a little relieved and no longer had my hand grasping the door.
“What about the maple syrup incident?”
“He said it was for the pancake feast at the VFW and since my brother was one, I talked my manger into letting him have a case.”
On a cold, November morning, 425 West Court Street was flooded with maple syrup flowing out of a malfunctioning pool pump plugged in to about five-hundred feet of extension cord in front of city hall, right into the mayor’s parking spot. Needless to say the mayor was pissed and he tried to find out who did it but the police had no idea—and the syrup in question was NOT from my job, but some Mr. Thomas had stored “for something sweet to happen in this town”—Cracker Barrel’s reputation remained unsullied as the case of syrup was indeed used at the pancake fest.
There’s still an essence of maple syrup in the air at that spot.
“Same brother?”
“No, another one. He’s dead.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. It’s okay.” I replied.
“You miss him.”
“Yeah, he was one of the good guys.”
“We need the good guys,” Garrett said as he slowed down to turn onto my street. “When do you work in the morning?”
“Depending on the weather, we might not open tomorrow.”
“I kind of thought that too. So, can I give you my number to call so I can bring you in?”
“Seriously?”
“I can’t let you walk, right? Or would you prefer to give me your number?”
I looked at him for a second and then down. I could swear he was doing all of this just to get my phone “If not, I can just come by. What time do we need to leave by?”
“Five-thirty.”
“You must love your job.”
“I do.”
“Well, then, I will come by at five-thirty. Does you dad own a shotgun?”
“No, he owns three.”
“How itchy is his trigger finger? I mean this is West Tennessee, but I’m hoping he has issues with loading.”
“I’ll let him know you’re coming.”

Garrett stopped the truck in front of the house. There was another vehicle in the driveway, a minivan with Texas plates.
I almost wanted to tell him to drive on but he had already turned off the engine, gotten out, and walked over to the passenger side.
He opened the door, I looked at his face and tried to show a reaction of being thankful and happy but I could only give a slight smile.
“Shall I walk you to your door?”
“You don’t have to.”
“True, but would you like me to?”
The thought of walking in and seeing my brother’s family-and having to run the gauntlet of greetings and questions terrified me. If Garrett was there, some questions could be deflected and maybe they would barrage him a plethora of questions that he could honestly answer and then they would let him go on his merry way. I would be safely in my room behind a locked door.
“Yes, thank you.”
He helped me out of the truck, passed the flowers to me and carried my work stuff and riding gear.
“You live here all your life?”
“So far,” I replied as we hiked up the snow-cleared walkway to the front door.
I took my keys out, unlocked the door, took a deep breath to try to block out the Hell I was about to undergo, and opened the door.
There were all sorts of voices but the one that send a cold shiver throughout my body was Adam’s as he called out: “Is that you, Nick? How’s my little brother?”

Wizards in Winter—Trans-Siberian Orchestra

Adam had already swung the door hard open so there was absolutely no way to stop the oncoming trauma.
He looked at me with a smile on his face at first, but it slowly faded and while it didn’t go dour, it was a good rendition of man who was extremely constipated all the time. His eyes looked at my face and noticed the make-up and light lipstick. He then noticed my hair was long and in a ponytail. His attention then went to Garret and, seeing that he checked out—to whatever Adam’s standards were—his attention turned back to me.
“You need a haircut.”
“Been considering it,” I replied. I then wanted to give Garrett a chance to bow out with his sanity intact. “Thanks for the lift home.”
Garret looked at me and then at Adam. “Five thirty good?”
“Yes, thank you.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Nicole.” Garett said as he waved to me. He didn’t say it mockingly, but I assumed he was just trying to avoid any hassle with Adam.
“Is that lipstick?” Adam asked as his wife, Karen Anne, came up from behind.
Karen Anne was what could be described as the apex of a Southern woman. She was from Alabama and abhorred wearing anything else but dresses—I mean she never wore pants. I mean, I would for work or if it was required but Karen Anne had some kind of allergy to denim. She had once gone off on a tangent—after several glasses of wine—that she had once dated a guy who, as she said, had “turned into a girl” and how disgusted she was about it all. I wanted to ask for her name at the time but decided not to, lest she ask a question she didn’t want to hear the answer to.

“Hey Nick, how are you doing, I—” She stopped in mid-greeting and did the same thing her husband did: sized me up without asking anything.”
“It’s cold, can I come in?”
Adam looked to Garrett’s truck as it drove off. “You’re boyfriend?”
I held up the bouquet of flowers. “No, not yet.”
Karen Anne had ducked back into the house. Adam followed her, leaving me to close the door with everything still in my hands.

The house was already packed with Danny and Lena over but now there were four-six if one counts egos- additional occupants in the house. I weaved my way to the hallway and to my room.
“Is that uncle Nick?” I heard one Adam’s kids ask and I came very close to having a panic attack. In fact, as soon as I locked my door I placed the flowers on my bed and then collapsed to the floor—no tears at that time, just a repeating vision of the fights that had occurred in the past.
I took off my work clothes while sprawled out on the floor and as ridiculous as it may have looked it gave me a chance to breathe and to try to once again block out those tidings of comfort and joy of Christmas Past and the current present.

I sat up and leaned against my bed, still no tears, but I could feel my face swelling and turning a slight shade of crimson. No, I didn’t want anyone to knock on my door and ask me if I was all right. What I wanted was to be able to walk out of my room, in my own house, and be treated for who I was. I knew it would not happen. Adam and Karen Anne would either ignore me or Adam would make a comment hidden within a compliment and that kind of pissed me off.
It did help me stop crying as I stood back up, went to my closet, pulled out blue skirt and a white shirt and accompanied them with a pair of rainbow earrings.
It would be worth it.

I took a few moments before opening the door but as I did, Lena stood on the other side.
“Dinner, or as your mom keeps saying, suppah, is ready.”
I had to wonder if it was from wine, courtesy of Karen Anne, or just mom trying to live up to her Southern roots.
“Can I ask you a question, in confidence?” Lena asked in a low whisper.
I nodded.
“How did you put up with Adam?”
I took a deep breath and just exhaled.
“I know the feeling,” she replied. “Join the family.”
I walked behind Lena—almost using her as a shield within my own home.

We walked into the dining room that was once again over packed with people: Dad sat at head of the head of the table with Adam and Karen Anne to his right. Danny sat across the table from Adam with Lena taking the seat next to him. I sat next to Lena and avoided eye contact with everyone as we ate. Mom walked back and forth between the dining room and the kitchen table where James and Amelia were sitting.
I almost thought they would make me sit at the kiddie table, but it appeared I was needed at the adult table.
“So, it’s on for the 27th?” Karen Anne asked Lena.
“Yes, in Thomas Park with all those beautiful trees.”
I held a slight grin about how that park once looked covered in blue, pink, and white two-ply.
“Even in the snow?” Dad asked as he took a bite of cornbread.
“As long as it’s not forty below,” Lena said as she “booped” Danny on the nose.
“We’ll need the ceremony to be very short, Adam.”
“Like, do you? Do you? Good. You’re married. Kiss her.”
“Don’t mind if I do,” Danny responded by kissing Lena on the cheek.
“So, if it’s blowing snow, you still want it outside?”
“The back-up plan is the garage,” Lena replied. “We may need to get some snow goggles.”
“We can have some skis in the background,” Mom chipped in as she brought in a pot of chili. “Adam, can you say grace for us?”
“Sure, mom. Kids, come in here to bless the food.”
Everyone stood up and held hands-Lena and Mom held mine as everyone closed their eyes.
I admit, I mentally blotted out Adam’s voice. For as much talk of, peace, love and forgiving us for our transgressions, I could not forget what he had said and done to me so many years ago. I was also convinced that I could never forgive him. I could be the nice person and be happy to help in whatever endeavor Danny wanted—even if it involved Adam—but I would not be insulted, belittled, or told I was some sort of blight on the family. So. Help. Me. God!

“Amen,” mom replied as she scooped up a large amount of chili with a silver ladle and lowered it into bowls in front of her for James and Amelia. I sat patiently as the food went around, counter-clockwise as Karen-Anne asked fifty, give or a take a few, mission questions about the upcoming wedding and the stories Adam brought up from time to time.
“He says these things in sermons and everyone’s thinkin: ‘nuh-uh’, that couldn’t have happened.”
“The truth is stranger than fiction,” Danny replied.
Adam nodded.
“Okay okay…what about the bird incident?”
“Reverend Al-“
“He’s not a reverend,” Adam sharply pointed out.
“Why do they call him one?” Karen Anne asked.
“He’s been married nine times and he performed his own ceremony on the very last one,” I said.
“Yep,” Danny replied as Dad looked back and forth between the conversion.
“Anyway, Mr Al gathered a murder of crows locked them a cage and they broke free while he was moving it across town in the back of his truck. They tore through Mrs. Thomas’—the mayor’s wife’s laundry and hung out on her house for a few weeks. They tried fireworks, the fire department, and firearms, but there were usually two birds that remained to taunt her.”
“Adam, can we go by the mayor’s house and see if there are any birds there?”
“They’re probably gone in the winter.”
“What else?” Karen Anne asked, her eyes were now glowing in anticipation like a kid on Christmas Eve.
“Mr Johnny’s pizza business?” I asked.
“Yes,” Danny yelled as he slapped his knee. Lena and Karen Anne looked at me.
“It only lasted a day,” I chipped in
“Gas explosion that occurred at nine o’clock on the Fourth of July. The store was closed, so no one was hurt, and it rained multiple colors and sparkles.”
“No way! Did he plan it?”
I shrugged my shoulders.
“This town gets crazier every year.”
“You can always move to Pecos,” Adam said.
Dad shook his head as he took a bite of chili.
“What else?” Karen Anne asked.
“There's when Mr. Thomas got his car from Uncle Don’s Shop up onto the roof of City Hall. No one ever figured out how it got there. Just a loud engine bang, some smoke and, poof! There it was on the balcony.”
“Seriously?” Karen Anne asked.
“It was a huge blizzard…and…Seth told this better, I’m trying to remember.”
“How did they get it down?” Lena asked.
Dad pointed at me. “Tell them, Nikki.”
“The official story is that it was a Christmas miracle, but it was really a covert band of men with welding torches who came in the middle of the storm and removed the car before Mayor Thomas returned to see the tire tracks in his office.”
“Adam, is this the same mayor as the one who you saved his grandson?”
“It was one of his nephews. I think his name was Gary.”

The Silent Nutcracker —Trans-Siberian Orchestra

Through the rest of supper, I kept to myself as I repeatedly pondered about how much Adam inadvertently controlled so much of my life. He was the reason there was a hole in the wall in my room, my mistrust of mainstream religions, and the saving the life of a person who, apparently, wanted to make a good impression on me. Adam was once again in front of Garrett and didn’t seem to care about him except to ask if he was my boyfriend. Garrett may have been if the roads had been plowed and we were both able to talk more. I missed most of the conversation until Lena and Danny got back to the wedding and what everyone was going to wear.
“Let’s just keep it in Christmas colors, mom,” Danny called in to the kitchen.
“That will work. We can spend more resources on the food and getting the word out.” Mom said as she brought out two pies.
I skipped the pies and went into the living room to see the tree. It was bare, as mom and dad never decorated it until we were all together. There were several boxes in the corner—filled with every type of decoration imaginable:
Lacquer-spayed popcorn? Four, ten-foot strands.
Hand painted, flour-and-salt ceramic ornaments, over sixteen from various years.
A small, angel with a broken wing wearing a garter belt and a leather jacket? We had one and it was in a box marked with a star and that was the one I went to unbury from the stack. Seth never told anyone where he purchased it but said he had to smuggle it across several nations and past his CO.
Danny has walked into the living room and saw what I was going for.
“Tell me you’re going to hang that last?”
“Of course. Right under the star.”
“Seth would’ve gotten a kick out of that.”
“He would, wouldn’t he?” I asked as Danny smiled back.
“Do you want me hang onto it. That dress doesn’t look like it has pockets.”
“I’m going to sew one on one day,” I replied as I opened the box in question, and then gazed in the direction of the dining room to see if Adam was looking. He wasn’t so I took the ornament out and gave it to Danny.
“He never said where he got this.” Danny stated as he took the figure and went down the hall.
I took more ornaments out and laid them out on the coffee table as Mom came in to look at the tree,
“Oh, we can get an absolutely sweet picture in front of the tree with Danny and Lena right here.” Mom moved her hands around like had just watched a Jackie Chan movie. “David!”
“Yes, dear?”
“Do we have any film in the camera?”
“It’s 2020, Ma,” Danny said as he walked into the room and took out his phone.
“You cannot develop a special picture by taking it on a phone,” Mom replied as she picked up a box and shoved it into his arms.
“Can’t develop film either unless you ship it out to Memphis.”
“Nothing's going to Memphis!” Dad shouted.
“Start taking ornaments out, Danny.”
“Got a better idea, Ma. Hey Adam, do the kids want to help with the tree?”
“They will even if they don’t want to," Adam replied as Jamie and Amelia flew into the living room and stood near the tree. They kept their distance from me. I wanted to believe that it was because they didn’t really know me but, from their eyes darting from looking at me and then to themselves I assumed there was something more, but I wasn’t going to bring it up. I didn’t want to ruin the fragile peace at the time.
Lena and Karen Anne stepped into the living room and at the stacks of boxes.
“Do you just remove everything that isn’t Christmas-y and place something red and or green in its place?” Lena asked.
“That’s about right.”
Karen Anne picked up a clay ornament that looked like a small blob balanced on top or a large blob with toothpicks sticking out. “This has the initials of AA. Adam, what is this supposed to be?”
“It was a penguin,” I replied. “The feet fell off years ago…they could still be in the box.”
“Oh, this is so cute. And he has a little beak too.”
I nodded as Karen Anne looked at me for a moment and turned to the kids. “Jamie, Amy, let’s get you some decorations to hang up, okay?”
She then moved back to the kids. I stepped back to see Danny get out the step ladder.
“Where did Dad get this tree?”
“The VFW brought it in from Wells Tree Farm,” I said as I handed over a length of popcorn rope.
“It’s like the Griswold’s tree.”
“They wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
“Hey Ma! We may need to move the couch.”
“It can go in the sitting room!” Mom called out from the kitchen. Adam stood next to Dad and they both looked at the couch.
“We’ll move it. Let’s get some manly muscle in to move it. Danny, Nick!”
“No, I’ll help you,” Dad gruffly responded.
Danny went to the end of the couch near me and readied to lift.
“Dad, we can get it. Nick, let’s move!”
“Nichole is not going lift the couch. I’ll help you.”
“No, Dad, Adam and I can get this,” Danny replied.
I turned to work on the tree as my face was probably as red as an ornament as I could feel Adam’s stare burning into my scalp.
“Ain’t heavy really,” Danny said as he hoisted up the end. “Just a straight shot.”
“Yeah, let’s take it straight,” Adam muttered, and I was sure that was a shot taken at me.
The living room fell silent for a moment as Danny and Adam moved the couch out of the room.
“Can we open a present on Christmas Eve?” James asked as he eyed a large, wrapped box in the corner.
“I have one for each of you to open,” Mom said in a loud whisper
“How many days?”
“Two,” mom replied as she held up two fingers.
I continued to hang decorations on the tree and wondered exactly where I would put that one ornament. Under the star was the plan but I was sure that Adam would see it and it was disappear into the fireplace or into the trash without a trace. So a part of me just wanted to hold onto it, maybe place it in my window…or maybe I could get one of those “Charlie Brown Christmas” trees that we sold at work and put that lone ornament on my lonely tree.

Ornament Trans-Siberian Orchestra

Years ago, Mom and Dad were on their way back from visiting a friend and Adam was at the church preparing for whatever he was going to do or say at the service that evening. He could do whatever he wanted, I would just stand next to the rest of the family holding onto a candle that was slowly melting away in a cardboard holder and singing Christmas carols that I knew by heart.
Danny and Seth were in the living room watching a Christmas movie of some sorts when I walked in wearing a red and white dress.
“What do you guys think?” I asked.
They turned from the movie and looked at me.
Danny paused the movie, “Uhh, is that new?”
“I got it last year, just never really did anything with it. Now seemed good. How does it look?”
“Looks good, Nikki,” Seth replied.
“You do you,” Danny replied and then unpaused the move.
“Wait a minute. Pause it.”
“I want to watch this.”
“It’s on DVD,” I whined.
“If you want me to say it looks cute? I’m not. I can’t. I don’t’ know what ‘cute’ is.”
“If Angela heard you say that,” Seth said as he shook his head.
“Exactly. I don’t know what’s cute. I’m not a girl.”
“So you wouldn’t say it was sexy?” Seth asked.
“First off, Nikki’s related to us—”
“It’s not suppose to be, as you put it, sexy,” I growled.
“It looks complimentary.”
“He means it looks cute,” Seth replied as he patted Danny on the shoulder. “You unlocked your sensitive side, Danny. Angela would be so proud of you.”
“Shut-up,” Danny replied as the front door opened.
We looked at the door to see Adam step in.
I immediately froze like a cat staring at a red dot. He moved in slow motion as he he walked in and closed the door.
“Mom and Dad aren’t back yet?”
“Nope,” Danny answered as he unpaused the movie.
“Everything ready at the church. I’ll need to be back in an hour.What are you wearing?”
Adam’s hard stare was on me.
“A dress.”
“I can see that. Why?”
“Because it’s hers,” Seth said as he sat up on the arm of the couch.
“Excuse me?”
“The dress is Nikki’s.”
“When did this all start?”
“It’s been a few years,” I replied, in hush tones, like a three year-old who did something wrong.
“You think you’re a girl?”
“I am.”
“You think you are a girl?”
“No, I am one.”
Adam closed the door, locked it, and then took off his jacket.
“So, what I’m hearing is that Nick thinks he’s girl and the two of you have no problems?”
“Mom and Dad don’t have issues with it. I don’t either,” Seth replied.
“You wouldn’t,” Adam said as he shook his head.
“I just. Want to watch. My movie,” Danny replied, Christopher Walken style.
“I have an idea, Nikki: You can wear a choir robe. There, problem solved! Adam’s happy, I’m happy and Danny can get back to…what are we watching anyway?”
“You’re telling me Mom and Dad are okay with you wearing that in public?”
“I haven’t been, like, out and about.”
“Thank God for that.”
“But it’s about time I did. I’m not going to deny who I am.”
Adam put his hands to his forehead. “You need to go change.”
“No.”
“You’re wearing that tonight?”
“Yes.”
“Go change.”
“No,” I replied with a shrill to my voice.
“You have got to be kidding me. If you go to the service tonight wearing that—”
“Then I guess I won’t go.”
“You’re going. We’re going as a family.”
“I’d sooner burn in Hell.”
“Keep talking, Nick,” Adam replied.
“I am going to start this movie over!” Danny muttered.
“If I go. I am wearing this dress.”
“Are you wearing a bra too?” Adam’s hands were shaken like he wanted to throttle something like, me.
“Were you looking for it?” I asked as I lowered my shoulder to reveal that yes, I had one.
“I go to school for six months and this…this all happens?”
“It’s been a bit longer than six months, Adam.”
“How long Seth, how long?”
“You need to ask Nikki.”
“Nick is a bit confused, so I’m asking you.”
“I’m a bit confused myself on why it matters,” Seth asked as he got up from the couch.
“It matters because our family is a pillar of the community.”
Seth shrugged his shoulder. “I don’t recall being nominated for that.”
“I just came home to sit down for a moment and to see if Mom and Dad were home and now I’m witnessing Sodom and Gomorrah in my living room.”
“I’m going to complete this with a set of earrings.”
“Nick” Adam yelled as I walked down the hall.
The lights in the hallway seemed dimmer as I walked back to my room—and that was because Adam’s shadow loomed over as I walked into my room.
“Take the bra and dress off and just wear a decent pair of jeans and a t-shirt for Pete’s sake. You’re not going to embarrass this family by wearing that!”
“I also have a pair of blue and white striped panties. Would you care to see those too?”
“No!”
Adam’s right fist flew into the wall, creating a massive hole. I stepped away, inching back to the door.
He turned back to me. His face was still in a rage. Like I had killed a puppy or something.
“Adam, you need to calm the fuck down!” Seth yelled.
“That! That is exactly the problem with all of you! You’re all perverts, delinquents and sinners!”
“Yes, I am!” Seth replied. “And unless your name is Jesus, so are you, Adam! So settle your ass down!”
Adam grabbed my arm and yanked me across the room like a human version of “Stretch Armstrong”
“Leave her alone!”
“Her?” Adam screeched. “Did you fail sixth grade science?”
“Did you fail seminary?”
“Hey!” Danny stepped in-between them. “We’re all better’n this, right?”
Adam and Seth were nearly at each other’s throats—it was like they couldn’t even see Danny standing in-between them.
“We can talk about all of this like the calm and rational guys we like to think we are when no one’s watching. Right?”
“I can do that,” Seth replied. Both of them looked at Adam.
“How bout you, bro?”
Adam sounded like a growling animal with every breath he took.
“Let’s talk about this, Adam, okay?” Danny asked as Seth waved his hand at me to get out of there!
“Run, Nikki!” Seth yelled as he grabbed one of Adam’s arms. Danny followed suit and tried to tackle Adam.
I ran like Hell down the hallway and sharply turned to the front door.
Seth and Danny were yelling but I couldn’t understand a word as I had my eyes on the door to escape from everything. I hoped they were able to hold Adam back so I could open the door and flee. Maybe I’d come back in a few hours, days, weeks whenever Adam had left.
I had reached the front door only to feel Adam’s still bleeding fingers dig into my back as he once again grabbed me, picked me up, opened the door and threw me out of the house and into the snow—right in front of the headlights of our parent’s car.

Garrett was at the house at o’dark thirty and drove me to work the next morning. The roads were sort of clear so the manager decided that we would be open, but the temperature had plummeted into the mid teen so everything had that shimmer of ice all over it.
“I can get your bike home for you unless you want to ride it home. Now, if you ride it home, I am going to follow you in case you slip or something.”
“I appreciate your help,” I replied.
“Glad to be of service. Not a problem.”
I nodded as I looked out the side window and then out front.
“Did you still want to come tonight?”
“Sure,” I replied.
“Great! I mean, great. I can have someone to talk to you. Everyone in the family is so much older than me and I still get relegated to the kids table. Nineteen years old and I still have to sit with the kindergartners.”
“You could tell them a few good limericks.”
“Tried that once. It was about crows and my aunt did not appreciate it for some reason. You wouldn’t know why, would you?”
“Your grandfather can tell it better than I could.”
“I knew it! I knew he or one of the guys had something to do with it. I was born into the wrong side of the family. My dad has to move to the other side of the state and I missed out on all of the shenanigans.”
“Shenanigans?” I asked.
“Is tomfoolery a better way to put it?”
“It’s more West Tennessee, yes,” I replied.
“Well, I am hoping we can get into some tomfoolery. Sorry, that sounded right in my head but saying it out loud…”
“I’m for the tomfoolery, Garett.” I looked at him and caught his eye for a second—fortunately for the both of us he kept more of an eye on the road.
“Really?”
“Surprise me,” I replied with an actual smile.
We pulled into the parking lot near the back door.
“I wish you didn’t have to go work but, I know it’s important”
“It is.”
“Okay, well, I will get some folks together to retrieve your motorcycle and then, I can pick you up this afternoon, if you wish.”
“I wish it,” I replied as I handed one of my keys to him, “You’ll need to unlock the front wheel.”
“Will do.”
I hesitated opening my door. Garrett then placed the truck into park, opened his door, walked over to the side and opened the passenger side. He then reached his hand out to me and all I could do was look at his face for a few seconds before I reached out to him.
“I hope you have a good day.”
“Thank you.”
We stood very close to each other and I really wanted him to just reach behind me and pull me in, and as much as he probably wanted to as well, something held him back.
“Don’t break any dishes.”
“Haven’t done that in three years.”
Garrett looked everywhere expect in my eyes for a moment.
“Listen, Nikki, I don’t know how to say this…”
I tried to smile, but I felt cold—not because it was, maybe, nineteen degrees, but because hardly anything good comes after the phrases “we need to talk” and “I don’t know how to say this” so I braced myself for the inevitable “let’s be friends before anything really starts”. Sure, he would help me with my transportation problem and sure, he would be friendly, perhaps for Mr. Thomas’ sake. I was about to be friend-zoned. Maybe I had thought more into the flowers than I should have. It’s a southern thing to be nice and forward and Garrett was just being that.
“I’ve kind of liked you before even meeting you. My grandfather talks about you so much and I kind of thought that he was spinning another tall tale but, no, he was telling it to me truthfully that I had to meet you. And now that I have, I am willing to do anything you ask.”
“You don’t have to do anything for me.”
“How about for us?”
“Us?”
“Too forward? I knew that was too forward…can I start over with what I was going to do before I started over-thinking?”
“Okay,” I replied.
He leaned in and kissed me.
That was another surprise for the day. It was interrupted by the “whelp” of a police car.

We broke our embrace but stayed close as the patrol pulled into the lot.
The front door of the restaurant opened and Miriam stormed out, first toward the officers.
“It happened in the back!”
“The back?”
“Mmm-mm. Mr. Jones is inside for you.”
The officer nodded and walked towards the door.
Miriam bee-lined to us a moment later.

“What happened?”
Miriam turned her face away from us as the wind blew. I had forgotten that it was freezing.
“You need to come inside, girl.”
“I’ll see you later,” Garret said as he let go of my hand.
“No, you need to come in too."

Garrett went around the the driver’s side, turned the engine off, and we all walked inside the store.

The managers were talking with the police near the entryway to the dining area. I kind of expected a robbery—but Miriam stated it was all in the back. Perhaps the safe?
The manager looked at me and then pointed the officer in my direction.
“Do you own a maroon colored motorcycle?” The officer asked as Mr. Jones took a step back.
“Yes?”
“Do you know your plate number?”
“You are going to let her take the day off, right?” Miriam yelled to Mr. Jones. “See why you’re staying?” She noted to Garrett.

I turned around, ran back to the front door and went outside into the frigid air once again.
I wasn’t upset about the bike being stolen but that someone happened to break into the restaurant that night and simply take it. I mean, they cold have stolen thousands of dollars of Bob Ross dolls and all the salt water taffy their dentist could handle on their next dental appointment; but no, it had to be something sentimental. Something familial, a memorial…and at that time, all I left were the keys.
Sure, I could get another—and if Seth was there he’s state that royal purple would be a good color scheme too.
“Sorry about your motorcycle,” Garrett stood behind me.
“It’s okay. I mean, it’s just a thing.”
“But it was yours.”
“My brother’s. He gave it to me a few months before he died.”
“You okay?”
“No,” I replied as I looked at sun trying to come up from behind the clouds.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
I spun around and looked at Garrett, “Yes.”

We sat in the cab of the truck with the engine running.
“I used to love Christmas. Our family was, like, really big on it,” I said as I wrung my hands. “We would all go to church on Christmas Eve, hold the candle, sing some songs and be with others and each others. But the next year, everything changed.”
“What changed?”
“I did-or at least Adam said something like that. I was just thinking that I was being who I really was and…and Seth stood up to him. He cold-clocked Adam because of me and then everyone went their own way. Everyone went and did their own thing for so long and I…I…gave up on everything, Garrett.”

I bawled so much I think most of what I said was completely unintelligible and my face was running so much that I looked like Tammy Faye Baker.
Garrett held his hand out to me. “I’m here. I’m not going away.”
“Yes, you will. You have to go back to school.”
“School follows me now. Virtual classes. You could go too. We could take classes together, you know?”

“I have no idea what I want to do with my life. Been trying to figure that out. Every yea, when I thought Santa was real, I’d ask him what I wanted for Christmas and he asked me if I was asking him to bring what my heart wanted.”
“Tall order for a Santa.”
“Yea. He’d ask ‘what do you want Christmas?’ and I’d point at my myself and he said that.”
Garrett smiled for a second.
“What?”
“I’ve heard that story too. Was this at the old Fred’s store downtown?”
“Yeah.”
“You’ll never guess who that Santa was.”

“You have a lot of dresses.”
Lena and Karen Anne and looked through my closet as I sat at my desk.
“I think they’ve been worn, maybe, once or twice.”
“This one looks so cute,” Karen Anne squealed.
Lena nodded.
“You need to try this one on again.”
They handed over a green dress that I recall I got for my Senior Prom, the one I never went to—and since I never went on any date whatsoever, it remained bagged and hung up.
I took the dress and they left the room.

I got undressed and looked at the person in the mirror. She looked unhappy and hurt, like fifteen years of her life had been Hell and here she was, alive but not living. Was I zombie, a ghoul, or a vampire?
I put the dress on and noticed it was fitting in the right places—but maybe those places stuck out too much from within it.
“Everyone’s going to be staring at me,” I whispered.
“And you want them to,” Lena answered from the hall.
“Kind of the point,” Karen Anne piped up as she walked back into the room. “That looks nice.”
“We can work on your hair, and this will work for the wedding too.”
“I thought it was going to be casual?” Karen Anne asked.
“Nikki, if you want to wear this again in two days, you go right ahead.”
“I really don’t think wearing this is a good idea,” I said as I reached behind my back to unzip it.
Lena moved my hands and secured the clasp. “Nonsense. You look wonderful.”
“Ready to conquer the world in heels or flats.”
“I do not have any shoes for this.”
“KA, do you think she needs fancy shoes?”
“Do you have any boots?”
“Seth’s biker boots.”
Karen Anne stepped back into the closet and pulled out a pair of leather boots that looked thin and shiny. I had never wore them more than once as they were a pain to get off and I had smashed a window trying to remove them one time.
“These are not riding boots,” Lena stated. “They are pretty kick-ass though.”
Karen Anne only nodded as she handed them over.
“Do you have a black shirt? We’ll try to do some layering.”
“When is Adam coming home?” I asked.
“Don’t worry about Adam, Nikki. I know about the wall.” Karen Anne stated and my eyes shot right to her face. “We’ve had a few talks about that. He’s felt bad about that but hasn’t found a way to say anything about it.” Karen Anne stepped back as I unlaced the boots. “He said Seth said something that hung with him. He won’t talk about it.”
Lena and I nodded in-between our attempts to put the boots on.
“Can I borrow these?” Lena asked.
“Assuming we can get them off my feet after tonight.”

Three hours later, Karen Anne and Lena had done their best to tease and adjust my hair—and they did a better job than I could have. They would leave one at a time and each time would come back wearing clothes as if they were going out for a night on the town…in Nashville or somewhere else.
I could hear Amelia and James complaining about wearing “fancy clothes”.
“Everybody ready?” Danny asked as he stepped into my room holding a small box.
“Just about,” Lena replied.
“Where is everyone else going?”
“With you. The whole family’s invited.”
“What?”
Danny walked over to me. “Mr. Thomas invited the whole family. But, I hear you’re the guest of honor.”
“For what?”
“Has Mr. Thomas ever revealed everything?”
“I..I don’t want to be be out in front of everyone.”
“You won’t. You’ll be out in front with everyone.”
“No,” I shook my head firmly. “I’m not going. I’m not, Danny.”
“Can you excuse us for a moment?”
Lena and Karen Anne left the room and Danny closed the door.
“What’s going on?”
“Mr. Thomas is dying. This is kind of like his wake. A party for him to enjoy…I’m not going to try say it like he did, but, he was adamant that you showed up—even if we had to drag you there kicking and screaming.”
“What’s he dying of?”
“He only said of boredom.”
“Even Adam?” I asked.
“Yeah, even Adam. I remember that night too.”
“He threw me out of the house, Danny.”
“I know.”
“And I’m just supposed to forgive and forget.”
“You know we can’t,” Danny replied.
“Is he going to rip this off of me, ignore me or invoke the angels to smite me?”
“I would’ve loved to be able to that when working at Starbucks. Smite me a few Karens.”
“Seriously, Danny,” I was three seconds shy of slamming my own arm through the wall.”
“Here, these belong to you.” Danny held the box out to me and then opened it.
I looked inside to see two battered pieces of metal held together by a chain: Seth’s dog tags.
“He always said that if had to wear ‘em while going through Hell..”

“Then I should too,” I took the tags and threw them over my neck. I already kind of looked like Helena Bonham Carter’s little sister and the splash of metal from the tags added to the ensemble.

Everyone in the house was overly dressed, even my parents, who I had never seen them as such except in their wedding album. We left the house and piled into two SUV’s.
“Adam’s meeting us there,” Karen Anne stated while tying to get the kids buckled in. I helped by holding Amelia’s hands in the air enough for the car seat’s top half to latch.
“Thank you.”

We pulled out the driveway and at that instant the feeling to get out of the car was upon me once again but, since it was for Mr. Thomas and Garrett was going to be there, I moved my hands away from the door, looked straight ahead, and tried to put any thoughts out of my mind.

Maybe the night would end in disappointment, but perhaps it would end on a fun note.
I felt a small smile on my face.

The party was at the Thomas Estate—the largest building next to the Walmart, the High School and the Polycom plant. It was an old house that had several wings and extensions added to it over the years—including a very large room that was dubbed “the ballroom” due to how many golf balls were once stuffed inside. I’m pretty confident it was a record, but Guinness never came out to verify before Mayor Thomas arrived home and cleared the room.

We entered the room from an external entrance looking like a displaced batch of royal cosplayers and were greeted by Mayor Thomas and his wife. Karen Anne came very close to asking about crows but James took that moment to run to see Santa Claus, who was on the far side, so she raced after him.

I looked across the room and saw Garrett. He shook some man’s hand and then walked across the crowded floor to meet me.
“I’m glad you’re here, Nikki .”
“Is Mr. Thomas really dying?”
He nodded and for a moment I didn’t know if I needed scream, cry or shrug my shoulders because, as Mr Johnny would say: “them’s the breaks, keep playing. ”
“I took it hard at first, but then he started talking about pizza, fireworks and how to combine the two. Said he got it from a grunt in the army who knew his way with incendiary rounds. They fired live rounds from a pizza shop and it didn’t even make any news?”
“Didn’t really go like that.”
“Were you involved?”
“Not me, but, I think I know who,” I replied as I flashed the metal tags around my neck.
“I’m going to stay here. Yeah, going to school on the internet is what I need to do. This town really is something.”
I nodded slightly as Mayor Thomas stood up on a make-shift platform.
“Please tell me he’s not going to make a political speech,” I whispered.
“Not until next year,” Garrett replied as he held onto my hand.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for coming to our family’s Christmas celebration. This is not an election year, so I will not bore you with any rigamarole. No, this is a rather a special and for our family, one that tugs at the heart. My father will be joining me on the stage in a few moments and I have invited Pastor Adam Armitage to lead us in a prayers and to say a few words.”

Adam stepped out from a hallway and walked up to the mayor in such a way that you would assume he was the mayor himself: completely confident about standing in front of everyone. I guess he had to get used to that if he was going to stand in front of a church crowd. I hoped he wouldn’t see me but if he did and he threatened to say anything I believe I had the resolve to storm the stage and—since I could never pick him up—body slam him to the ground. Whatever I did after that would be left up to God.

“Would you pray with me?”
I was never a big person on praying. I never felt that link to what or whoever was out there. I was not against anyone as long as they were not against me and since I had not been on speaking terms with Adam for so long I took him on his high ground presence as the symbol of whatever he thought he was selling to the masses to make them feel better. I lowered my head—but my mind was stuck on a ten second loop of a fist going through a wall and then the feeling of being thrown into the air and landing in the snow inches away from the front of a car…and yes, Adam still had great upper body strength.

“Dear God, thank for allowing the storm to pass us by and to allow us to be gathered together in the celebration of the life of a great man—”
“I’m not dead yet!” Came a voice from the side.
“Amen!” Adam shouted as Mr. Thomas walked into the room with thunderous applause. Mr Johnny and Reverend Al slowly followed behind him.

Adam tried to hand the microphone over but Mr. Thomas handed it back to him. Adam turned to the audience.

“I’ve known Mr. Thomas a long time but only got to know him personally on a cold day in November eighteen years ago. I want to say it was heavenly providence that brought us together and on how that night I felt the tugging to help my fellow man. To love my fellow man. And, I love this man, he has taught me so much and continues to teach me from afar. From how to not run a pizza parlor and how not to decorate an office.”

There were a few laughs in the audience…except from the mayor’s wife who looked like she had seen a ghost.

“While speaking with Mr. Thomas, I learned there are things I need to apologize for and so, like a mentor should, he has ordered me,” Mr Thomas nodded and tapped the stage with his cane. “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but, do not have love, I gain nothing.W hat he has tried to teach me the most, I failed to learn and have hurt the ones closest to me. Firstly, my brother Danny, I apologize for locking you out of the bathroom during burrito night.”

I would have buried my head in shame but Danny raised his hands high and nodded.

“Seriously, though, Danny, I wasn’t always there for you, like Mom and Dad wanted me to be, but, in a way, that could be a good thing for the both of us. And, to my lost brother, Seth, who died serving in Afghanistan—”
“This! We’ll! Defend!” Reverend Al yelled and a deafening applause started around us.
“We didn’t see eye to eye on everything and as much as I thought he was rule-breaker and never listened to authority, he did receive quite a few medals and accommodations. He called me before his final deployment and had me swore on several Bibles, which I had with me, to never tell a soul what he was going to say until the time was right. The time is still not right, or at least it’s not my place to tell.” Adam looked at Mr. Thomas who was moving his head to search through the audience.
He looked in Garrett’s direction and pointed his cane; but I realized he was pointing at me.
“And lastly, I need to apologize to my sister. I’m sorry Nikki. We can forgive, but it’s next to impossible to forget.”
Mr. Thomas held his hand out for the microphone and Adam handed it over as I tried to move behind Garrett as everyone was now looking at us.

Mr. Thomas took a large step and nearly fell to the floor. There was a collective gasp and a few muffled shouts as he wobbled back and forth on his cane but kept on going without a fall.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Nicholas Paul Thomas, I am 86 years old and I am dying. But I will say that I felt like like dying on the spot five years ago. There was just this thought that I was just not the person I felt I was in the eyes of others. I felt like a relic and that my time had passed so I thought…’this is it. This’ll be my last day on Earth.’ I’ve done everything I’ve wanted to do. Nothing more under the sun, no one to reach out to me, family excluded, of course, but when does anyone lean on the good when it’s not around at the time?”

Mr. Thomas stopped in front of us. “I sat down at a table, feeling sorry for myself, when this angel came to me and asked how I was doing and when I told her I was feeling down, she sat down with me and we talked over biscuits and coffee. I didn’t feel that weight on my shoulders anymore and I never did. This girl is my hero. So, if there is to be a celebration of my life, I want her to celebrate it with us.”
“Us?” I asked.
“You, me, Garrett, Al, Tony, family, the whole town.”
I took a step forward. “Thank you, Mr. Thomas.”
“No, my dear, thank you and to show you my gratitude, I pulled in a favor or two,” Mr. Thomas said with a wink. “Do you know how hard it is a to find a mechanic who works on a Nakaruru?”
“I do.”
“Well, I found one!” Mr. Thomas turned around and a door opened to reveal a man in coveralls carefully, like he was holding onto the most valuable thing in the world, roll out a freshly detailed maroon-colored motorcycle.

The world didn’t completely change after that night. Sure, some things happened quickly…like Danny and Lena’s wedding, which was held shortly after Mr. Thomas’ proclamation that his son was free to run the town now—something that didn’t sit well with the mayor. Some thought it was just a joke but, most of us, knew that it was one of many of Mr. Thomas’ last jabs at his son’s political career. Adam and Reverend Al took turns with the ceremony while Mr. Johnny obtained the licensing paperwork—there was a question on how he was able to acquire the forms at such a late hour but shortly after afterwards Mr. Thomas handed his son a massive set of keys—one for every governmental building.

Dad was invited to run for city council in the next election and he accepted after learning that there was a former Memphian who was planning to run. Mom supported Dad’s running, but refused to assist with any stump speeches, making phone calls or doing anything that would keep her from being the “sweet” gran-maw maw to three children: Jamie, Amelia and Danny and Lena’s soon to be born.

Adam and Karen Anne continued to live in Texas where Adam kept the size of his church a modest size, stating that the church was the people, not the building. He also sponsored a shelter named after Seth in conjunction with the Erin Collins Memorial Project. Karen Anne even brought in her former girlfriend, Kristina Nelson, onto the board to assist with their mission: that no one is forgotten, left behind, or ever abused again.

Danny and Lena moved to Memphis—well, Germantown, in complete spite to Dad and to finally find out what his problem was with Memphis.
“I’m going to say a short sentence, Danny.”
“Okay. Why do you hate Memphis?” Danny asked as they sat in the waiting room of the hospital. Mom was in the room with Lena.
“There’s a place down there that will steal your wallet, your mind, and any sense of value and decency you got. One should never go there and the whole town needs to be shuttered off because of it.”
“That’s two sentences, but, okay.”
“I went to gentlemen’s club when I was eighteen, before I met your mother, and I was asked if I wanted to go to the back room and play ‘around the world’. I thought, hey, a game room, but it wasn’t.”
“That’s more than I ever wanted to know Dad.”
“What’s worse, Seth went there once time too.”

I remained in town and continued to work at the same Cracker Barrel store, except I was moved to the back of the house to work in accounting along with Garrett. However, there were a few hours of the day where I waited tables: when Mr. Johnny and Reverend Al came in. They would sit with the Mrs. Late Mr. Thomas’ wife, Miriam, who, everyday, would sit in awe at the stories about her late husband that barely scratched the surface of his life.

“How fresh is the meatloaf?” Mr. Johnny asked.
“It was just in the field yesterday.”
“Let’s go with the meatloaf, okra, and the applesauce.”
“I’ll get that for you sir.”
“Thank you.”
“Hey, Nikki, has Paul’s grandkid given you that ring yet?”
“What ring?”
“You gone said too much, Tony, You’ve blown his surprise.”
“Believe me, I’ll be surprised," I replied as I looked to the back of the house at Garrett.
He held up a small, angel with two repaired wings wearing a garter belt, a leather jacket and something golden shining on it head like a crown.