Chapter 5 The Date
I was now seriously into painting the industrial landscapes and was building up quite a portfolio on the website run by the printers, and sales were going well, the income was now more than enough to pay my household bills. Lexie Robson was gathering a cult following amongst a lot of the art world, and even some well-known smart London Galleries were buying the prints and selling them at a lot higher price than I was getting from the website sales. I had given a set of prints of the images of Killhope to the museum there and they ordered more in various sizes for sale in their shop. Along with continuing to use the Maltby Arms as my personal gallery my studio was becoming a feature of the local tourist trail.
As some of the industrial heritage paintings were quite a niche market I started on other general historic sites, the Roman forts on Hadrians Wall; the ruined Abbeys and Monasteries, relics of the reformation under Henry VIII; National Trust Country Houses; the numerous castles in Northumberland and Cumberland, remnants of the border skirmishes with the Scots: and some of the glorious landscape vistas that I passed through on my travels to the various sites.
Living as Lexie was now becoming normal for me, wearing skirts, dresses, and the occasional leggings or women’s trousers was just an accepted part of my daily life, and I rarely thought that I was doing anything out of the ordinary. I was sleeping soundly, uninterrupted by dreams of visits from Charlotte, and life was generally calm and good.
One morning as i was working in my studio, I was pleasantly surprised to receive a call from Jim at Eggheads. “Hi Lexie, the show with you’ll on should be broadcast the week after next, keep an eye out for it in the schedules and get your DVR set up for it.”
“Thanks for letting me know Jim, do you do that for everybody?”
“No, just for ones we are particularly keen on and the ones who do well. That is not the real reason I called though, I was thinking would you like to get together for a drink or a meal sometime, it would be nice to meet up again?”
I was totally flustered, although I had now been living as Lexie for a few months, it had not even entered my head that anyone would be interested in me in that way. I needed time to think about it and decide whether it was fair to lead him on with him thinking I was a woman, it suddenly brought my situation back into my mind again.
“Thank you so much for thinking about me Jim, I truly appreciate it but I am throwing myself into my work at the moment, and I am not sure if I have the time to spare.”
“Oh, come on Lexie, you need to have a break sometime, you know what they say ‘All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.’or in your case ‘Jill a dull girl.”
“You’re right Jim, that was a bit sharp of me, it will be really good to see you again. How about if I meet you at The Bay Horse in Wolsingham, just for the moment I would like to keep away from St John’s Chapel.”
“I know the place, it sounds ideal. Are you free on Monday, at 7:30?”
“I’m looking forward to it, it will be a nice change.”, little did he know how much of a change it was for me.
I called Josie and arranged to go round to see her as there was a favour I wanted to ask from her. Half an hour later, after quickly changing and freshening my make up I made my way round to her place.
“ What’s all this big secret about Lexie?”
“ I’ve agreed to do something and I am not sure if I am doing the right thing.”
“Stop messing about, just come out with it, you can’t keep me dangling on a string like this.”
“I had a call from Jim, you remember him from the Eggheads. Well, he asked me out for a drink and I agreed to meet him.”
“ And? Why do you so desperately need to tell me this?”
“In case you have forgotten Josie, although I might look and dress as a female and even talk and act like a woman, I am a man, and there is no future in any relationship, so why bother and just lead him on?”
“Just think Lexie, for many months now you have been living totally as a woman, everyone accepts you as a woman, unless you are intending to soon return to life as a man, you need to start thinking like one too. Jim is attractive, pleasant, a bit of a charmer, and he obviously likes you as you are. What is stopping you going for a drink and an evening out with him, you might enjoy it?”
“I’m new to dating as a woman, in fact it is a long time since I dated as a man come to think of it, and I am not sure how to deal with it.”
“Why not give it a try, what harm can one night out do, I’m sure that he will be as nervous as you, and he won’t be expecting you to jump into bed with him.”
“Will you do me a favour? Can you and Russell ‘accidentally’ bump into us and make up a foursome, I will be a lot more comfortable? I’m meeting him in the Bay Horse next Monday.”
“Ok, I’m sure that Russell will go along with that. It will be a pleasant change to go out in a group, not that we need company to keep us amused, it just is nice to mix with someone else occasionally.”
“As I said, this is all new for me, what should I wear, what do we talk about. and how do I behave with him, it’s all so confusing? My mind is all over the place about this, I’m still not sure that I am doing the right thing.”
“Don’t be daft, you need to get out a bit more, other than the weekly quizzes you are locking yourself away working in your studio. You don’t need anything too dressy, but that’s exactly the right question girl, maybe you are more switched on than you realise. Nothing too fancy, just smart, like the stuff you wear for the quizzes down at the pub, but maybe a light blouse rather than the tops you normally have on. Let me know later what you are wearing and I will try not to outshine you. When you are out with us girls, you join in the chat like the rest of us, just be yourself, or yourself as Lexie, and the conversation should just flow. Ask him about his work, men always like that, and act like you are really interested in what he does, ask about his family and friends, When we arrive, if you are unsure just follow what I am doing. Another question for you though, why come to me rather than Julie, you seem to spend most time with her?”
“Oh, that’s easy, I wanted a double-date, you are still in the game, and it is not unusual for you and Russell to have a night out. With the others there would be all sorts of questions from their husbands. I’ll give you a call to let you know what I am wearing and I’ll see you there at 7:45, if you arrive a bit later than us it will seem to be an accidental meeting.”
After a walk-on the fell on Sunday afternoon to clear my head of the doubts I still had as to whether I was doing the right thing, my evening was spent getting ready for my date with Jim, removing all my body and leg hair, covering myself with moisturising body lotion. painting my fingernails and toenails, and then setting my hair in rollers. I thought back to how much easier life was as Leckie, a quick shower, brush my teeth, and I would be ready to face the world.
As Josie had suggested I did not want to appear too dressy, I just put on a cream knee-length straight skirt with side slits and a cyan half-sleeved v-neck satin blouse, which Josie called stylish and sophisticated when I called her to let her know what I had chosen.
When I arrived at the Bay Horse, I entered nervously, it was almost like being a teenager again on a first date, which in some ways it was, it was my first time out other than with the girls, but I just took a deep breath and made my way inside. Jim was already there sitting at a window alcove table and he waved me over, stood up to greet me with a kiss on the cheek, and went to the bar to order drinks.
“I’ve been here for a while, I didn’t want you to arrive and be on your own, I know that a lot of women are not comfortable sitting in bars by themselves, you can be a target for all the boys that are trying to impress their mates by chatting you up.”
“That’s very gallant of you, but you are right, even if they don’t come over to say anything, you can feel their eyes on you, checking you out. Anyway, we are both here now, tell me a bit about yourself, Other than the fact you like quizzes and are involved in TV productions, I know nothing about you.”
Jim was very easy to talk with and we soon knew a lot more about each other. We were comfortably chatting away, and the time quickly passed. I didn’t really notice that Josie and Russell had not arrived, and in a way I forgot all about them, I was enjoying my time with Jim too much.
“Is that one of your cousins that has just come in, over there by the bar?”
Josie was looking around and caught my eye, and walked over to us.
“Hi Lexie, this is a nice surprise, do you mind if we join you or would you rather be alone?”
“Of course Josie, come and sit down. This is Jim, from Eggheads, remember, we’re just out for a quiet drink together, you are not interrupting anything.”
Russell came over with a tray of drinks, he must have looked over to see what Jim and I were drinking, or asked the bar staff, because he got it right. I introduced the guys to each other and we had a quick chat before Josie got up and headed to the ‘Ladies’, “Are you coming too Lexie, there is something I need to tell you?”
When we were safely out of hearing she smiled at me. “How is it going you seem to be getting on ok? Do you want us to hang around or would you rather we say that we have to be somewhere and leave you alone? Sorry, by the way, for being an hour late, I thought that we would let you have a bit of time together first.”
“To be honest, i didn’t realise how much time had passed, we were just enjoying getting to know about each other.”
“That’s a good sign, he seems like a nice bloke, just take it slowly with him though.”
We freshened our makeup and went back to the table and for the next couple of hours we all got on famously, there was a constant chatter between us and it was a shame when it was time to leave.
With hugs and kisses and a whispered” Are you alright being left with him?” from Josie, they left us in the car park.”
“Thanks so much Lexie, I’ve enjoyed tonight, can we do it again sometime soon?”
“Of course we can, give me a call.” I replied, reaching up to put my arms around his neck and drawing him in for passionate kiss. I hadn’t planned that , it just seemed the right thing to do, and I think it surprised him, he didn’t seem to be expecting that.
With a bit of a blush from the kiss, which had sent a shiver of excitement down me, I made my way back to my car and sat for a few minutes just to collect my thoughts and consider what I had just done. When we had planned tonight’s accidental meeting, Josie had told me that i needed to start thinking like a woman, but that kiss had taken it further and I had actually felt like a woman at that moment. As I drove off, I noticed that Jim pulled away after I was on my way, having seen that I had got away safely, it gave me a warm feeling that he was being protective towards me.
I was soon safely home, cleaned up and ready for bed and lay there my mind buzzing thinking about Jim and that kiss. I didn’t know what had driven me to it, but I knew that at that moment I had approached the point of no return, and for the first time began to accept that it wasn’t just convenience that kept me living as a woman, but that it seemed the right thing for me to be doing.
As I was dropping off to sleep , I had a vision of Charlotte standing at the end of my bed.
“Let me sit with you Alexandra, You are beginning to discover where your life may lead you, but I can help you understand a bit more about why you are here.”
“Are you driving me to becoming a woman? Is this a hatred of men for what James did to you?”
“ Far from it Alexandra, I am not forcing you to do anything, any choices you make are your decision, I am just showing you options for what path your life can take. You make a beautiful woman, you have inherited all the best features of the Robson family. You have now with that kiss tasted some of the pleasures of womanhood, enjoy them while you can.”
“Why pick me, Charlotte, there must have been others in your family who could have discovered the truth of you and James.”
“ The truth does not just affect me Alexandra it has influenced your life too.”
“I don’t understand.”
“ Let me put two images in your mind which will help to explain your connection to me.”
I had a vision of James and another man having a fight, which was broken up by several bystanders who gave the other man a severe beating, and left him rolling in agony on the ground. The second image was of Charlotte hugging a younger man who then walked away carrying a small suitcase.
“When Harold, my brother, your great-grandfather found out what James had done to me, he went over to Killhope to have it out with him,.They had a big argument and a fight started between James and him, but some of the mine workers joined in and beat Harold almost to death. As he walked away James told him. ‘If you know what is good for you and your family, I never want to see your face again, get out of my sight and away from the dale.’ Harold managed to get back home, crawling and limping and collapsed at the door. It was a few weeks before he fully recovered from his beating and was able to get about again. He told us about the threat to the family if he did not leave the dale and decided that it would be best if he went away. He packed his few belongings and left, never to return.”
“ So, that is how my family came to be living in the Midlands, well out of the reach of the Graham family?”
“ So you see, it is not only the wrong that James did to me that needs to be righted, but what happened to Harold too. He was forced away from his home and his family. At first there was the occasional letter from him but they did not last long. Until you came back to Manor Lodge to reunite our family, we had no idea of what had befallen him. He did not even dare to return for the Christening when Arthur was born a few months later, he never got to meet his nephew. Think about what I have told you and we will talk again.” She just faded from sight then, leaving me totally confused, I had never before believed in the spirit world or ghosts, but it was too vivid and detailed to just be my imagination in a dream. I slept fitfully, and every time I woke up my mind was buzzing with all the things Charlotte had said, and I was not particularly refreshed as I made my way down to the kitchen in the morning, when I was interrupted by the phone tones.
“ Hi Lexie, you seemed to be getting on well with Jim last night, Russell and I saw you in the car park before we drove off. I know I told you to start thinking like a woman, but you don’t do things by halves do you, that wasn’t just a friendly goodnight and thank you kiss, was it? Are you seeing him again?”
“I guess so Josie, I mean I hope so, I’m glad you convinced me to have a night out with him, I really enjoyed being with him. He said he would give me a call to arrange something else soon. Are you going down for the quiz tonight, there is something more I need to tell you all about Charlotte’s story?”
“I wasn’t going to but now that you have given me that teaser, I have no choice, I’ll see you there later.”
As all the girls were there, Julie agreed to help Kelvin behind the bar, leaving the other four of us to do the quiz. As was now becoming regular, we won again and Julie came to join us with our prize, 3 bottles of Sauvignon Blanc, and a collection of clean glasses.
Josie was not going to let me tell my story in my own time and immediately took over the conversation. “ Right, Lexie, you have kept me on tenterhooks far too long, what is it that you promised to tell us.”
“After I got home from my night out with Jim I….”
“ What night out with Jim and who is he?” interrupted Jane, “You kept that quiet.”
“Jim, from the Eggheads, he called a few days ago and asked me out for a drink. I just met him for a drink and Josie and Russell happened to turn up at the same place. Anyway, I’ll tell you about that later”
“You are going to do that, we want all the details.”
“As I was saying, after I got home and into bed last night, I had another visit from Charlotte, and you may not like what I have to say Josie. Apparently my great-grandfather Harold was badly beaten by James and some of his workers and was forced to leave the area after he confronted him about the way he had treated Charlotte, which is why my side of the family have been living down in the Midlands for the last hundred years or so. So Charlotte is not only asking me to right the wrong done to her, but also trying to welcome me back into the family, which Harold was forced to abandon. That is why she has chosen me me to help her change the destiny of us all. So maybe.James was not just manipulated by his family but that he was knowingly leading Charlotte on and using her, and was not the nice kind genuine lover that we thought he was.”
“That’s a bit of a turn-up, I had a bit of sympathy for him, but, if you are right, he doesn’t deserve it. and maybe it was best that the two families drifted apart and never joined together.” Jane snapped back scowling
Josie sat quietly considering what I and Julie had said. “ But you have met Russell, he is not like that, I am not going to let something that happened 100 years ago spoil what I think of him, just because his ancestors were not nice people doesn’t mean that he is the same.”
“Josie, Has Russell found out any more from his family about the story of James and Charlotte?”
“Not a lot, his parents didn’t know anything about a family scandal, and his grandparents just quickly changed the subject when it was brought up. Obviously they knew something but didn’t want to talk about it, so everything you think you have discovered is all probably true.”
“ Ok,I think that is all there is to that at the moment, now you have to tell us all about Jim, come on girl, spill the beans.” Jane was not going to let the matter of my date drop, and I told them all about the call from him, and meeting him and getting to know him better.”
“You forgot to mention the goodnight snog as you were leaving Lexie.” Josie smiled and brought a blush to my cheeks.”
“It just seemed to be the natural thing to do at the end of a really pleasant night with him.”
“Are you trying to tell us that you didn’t enjoy it, because if you are, I for one don’t believe you. You are becoming more of a girl every day Lexie, I find it hard to think of you as a man anymore.” Jeanette completed the questioning of me.”
Lying in bed later I thought about their reactions. They were just treating me as one of their girl friends now expecting me to continue going out with Jim. Was this what I really wanted, to live my life like any other woman, or was I just playing at it, I really needed to seriously consider my future.
To be continued.
Chapter 6 Commitment
It was several months before I was called up for ‘Millionaire’. I was still living and working as Lexie, regularly going out with Jim, and it was becoming a strain trying to avoid a physical relationship. I still had not told him that I was still a man, despite my appearance and the way I acted, and was not inclined to test him with a proposal for a gay relationship, but my life as a man was becoming a distant memory. Other than my remaining male groin I was now effectively a woman, the way I dressed, carried myself, talked and even how I reacted to events. I had been secretly taking oestrogen hormones since not long after my first date with Jim, unknown to my cousins,, and my skin texture, muscle tone body fat distribution and lengthening thicker hair were definitely combining to give me an even more natural-looking female appearance.
I regularly had dreams of Charlotte in which she was now speaking to me, telling me about her life with George and bringing up Arthur, questioning me about Harold’s life and his family leading down to me. She was becoming more real to me and I was no longer concerned about being visited by the spirit of of ancestors, but was treating her more as a friend and confidante. Although she kept telling me that all the decisions were mine and that she was not influencing my thoughts, she was actively encouraging me to develop my path to femininity.
Julie and Jane had decided to come with me to watch me take part in ‘Millionaire’ and I put all my thoughts of Charlotte and worries about my changing body behind me as we made our way to the studios in Manchester. After a day of introductions and confirming the rules and what was expected of us, I was led along with the other contestants down to the main floor of the arena.
I missed out on the ‘fastest finger’ round at the start of the show, and watched with a bit of jealousy and disappointment as the first contestant made his way up to £64000 before bowing out. I won through second time round, and after being fitted up with a mic made my way nervously to the chair.
“You’re Lexie Robson from Weardale in County Durham and you are now only 16 steps away from one million pounds, do you want to play.” asked the host.
”I am, and it is a beautiful part of the country, and I am here to play.” I replied as I tugged at the hem of my skirt which had ridden up when I perched myself on the contestants high stool.
“What do you do up there.”
“I am an artist, mainly landscapes and heritage scenes.”
“Oh, you are that Lexie Robson, I actually have one of your scenes of the Lead mines at home, you are very talented.. You know the rules, Lexie, let’s get started.”
The first few rounds up to £32,000 went without any problems but as I progressed up the ladder, I struggled a bit and by the time I got to £500,000 I had used all my lifelines.
“Right Lexie, you can walk away with the £500,000 now, you are on your own with no lifelines left, so think carefully before deciding on the million pound question. Lets’s have a look at it before you decide. Are you ready?”
“As ready as I will ever be.”
“Lexie, for one million pounds, Segedunum is at the endpoint of what ancient Roman Structure. Is it?:
The Appian Way
The Aqueduct of Segovia
Hadrians Wall
The Pont du Gard “
I almost jumped out of the seat and screamed, but I contented myself with a punch in the air, and a ‘Yeeees’.
“Don’t you think you should give me your answer and get it confirmed before you start celebrating” the host said with a cheeky grin.
“A couple of weeks ago, I was at Chesters Fort on Hadrian’s wall to do some sketches, and read all about the various structures along the route. Segedunum was the garrison fort and supply point at the eastern end of the wall, and there is a charming and really interesting museum there. Segedunum is a part of answer C , Hadrians wall, final answer.”
As the screen turned green in confirmation a cascade of glittery tinsel fluttered down from the ceiling and the host came over, gave me a big hug and shook my hand. “Congratulations, Lexie Robson, you go back to County Durham with one million pounds. As I was leaving the stage Julie and Jane ran on to greet me and join in the celebrations.
We immediately had a meeting with the production team who made suggestions as to how to invest my winnings, and took us all out for an overpriced meal and celebratory drink in one of the smart City-Centre restaurants. They were keen to promote me on the news and current affairs daytime TV shows to raise the profile of the show. Because of my personal circumstances, I was a bit reluctant to get too high a profile, but got carried along on the tide of publicity and celebrity. Julie and Jane went back to St John’s Chapel, but I stayed in Manchester for the rest of the week doing the rounds of the TV studios.
Unfortunately the inevitable happened and some over-enthusiastic journalist dug into my life story and gender situationand it was splashed all over the more popular ‘red-top’ papers. Rather than resulting in a lot of criticism, abuse, and embarrassment, it actually started another round of tv appearances to discuss my life. I avoided any discussion on ‘special friendships’ in general and made no mention of Jim, he deserved better than being dragged into all this with me. However Idid have a long chat with him and I had to accept that he needed time to get his head around the situation and sadly we decided to have a break from each other for a while.
in one of the interviews the presenter was handed anew addition to the script by one of the production crew. “ Some of our researchers have been talking to the people in your home village and we have been told that since you returned to Weardale that you have been visited many times by the ghost of one of your ancestors, would you like to tell us more?”
“ Not really, I will not go into details. When I moved to Weardale It was just to give me a new start in life and to see the area where my Great-grandfather was from and to do a bit of research into my family history. I began to have regular dreams of events of long ago which led me to find out some more details of the family. Gradually the dreams turned into visits, by a long-dead Aunt, what you would call a ghost or a spirit, and she helped guide me along the path I have taken to where I am now.”
“ Are you saying that this ghost encouraged you to become a woman?”
“ Let’s just say this, I have never believed in ghosts or the spirit world but my Aunt has shown me things that I would not otherwise have known, I believe that she may have helped me realise the true purpose of my life which led me to make the decision to live as a woman. Beyond that, things are private and affect other peoples lives so can we leave the discussion there please.”
“ Thank you Lexie, you have definitely led an interesting life since you moved back up North, I am sure that we will be hearing a lot more of you in the future.”
Between living as a woman and the body changes being caused by the hormones I was taking, my contacts with the spirit of Charlotte, and having won a fortune in the quiz, I was feeling a bit of a freak and tried to avoid any contact or discussions with anyone on the journey home. I hoped that my brief moment of fame and celebrity was over and that I could just return to my quiet life in the tranquil dales of the North Pennines. When I arrived back at St.John’s Chapel, other than congratulating me, most people were pleasant and just treated me as they had done before and I soon calmed down, relaxed and considered where I wanted to go from now on.
A week later when the cheque had been cleared by the bank and I had sorted out what to do with the winning we had a private celebration in the Maltby Arms with the girls and all the regulars, At the end of the evening I called for a bit of quiet as I wanted to say a few words.
“Cousins, friends and neighbours, since I arrived here you have all made me very welcome, you are a wonderful friendly community and I would like to thank you for being so kind to me. I have here five cheques. Firstly for the chairman of the parish council £100,000 to upgrade and give a facelift to the Village Hall which I would like to be renamed ‘The Charlotte Robson Memorial Hall’, as I am sure that you have all had a giggle about my belief that her spirit has guided me along the way to my new life here. Secondly, I came here as a stranger to investigate my roots and was soon welcomed into their family by the four ’Robson Lasses”, and I have a thank-you cheque for each of them for £25000. Enjoy your night everyone and the bar is still on my tab.”
The celebrations carried on late into the night, but my cousins and I had a long private family moment away from the others where we all had a good cry, and they all thanked me for the money but wanted to give back the cheques, which I refused. Josie added to the celebrations by announcing that her and Russell were getting married and that she wanted all the ‘Robson Lasses’, me included, to be her bridesmaids and attendants, All of us were delighted for her, but especially me. I had never, in my wildest dreams, ever expected to take on that role. I now understood what Charlotte had said to me in one of my earlier dreams of her, I had now righted the wrong and united the Robson and Graham families as they should have been all those years ago.
I made my way home, happier than I could remember having been, unlocked the door and was just about to go in when I was grabbed from behind, a hand forced over my mouth and I was pushed roughly inside.
“ Acting like the Queen of the village, you are a queen for sure, you pervert. If you want so much to be a woman I will show you what it really means.” I recognised my attacker as one of the farm hands from a short way up the dale, who had a reputation for violence, particularly against women, usually when drunk. He pinned me against the wall and was running his hand up my thigh under my dress, I was terrified as he was much bigger and stronger than me and there was not much I could do to stop him.
All of a sudden, just as I was about to accept my fate, I heard a loud thump and felt him pull away from me. I opened my eyes to see him lying on the floor in a pool of blood and shards of glass, and standing over him, a worried look on his face was Jim. I ran to him and we hugged silently for a long time until I had stopped crying and had calmed down,
“Thank you so much Jim, I shudder to think what would have happened if you hadn’t turned up when you did. What are you doing here anyway?”
“That’s a nice welcome ! Josie phoned me to tell me about your party tonight and invited me along, but when I arrived I just couldn’t bring myself to come in and just waited outside in my car for you to leave. I was just about to get out to talk with you when I saw that you were being followed and decided to catch up with you to see you safely home, but you were back here before I reached you. I came in and saw and heard what was going on and just grabbed the nearest heavy object i could see, a large glass vase, and smashed it over his head. You are obviously shaken but are you otherwise ok, he didn’t hit you or anything?”
“I’ll be alright, Kelvin had warned me about the dangers of walking home in the dark, but I felt that nothing would ever happen to me, I will obviously have to be a lot more careful in future.”
“Well, that may not be such a big problem, as I’ll always be around to protect you from now on.”
“ Does that mean that you accept as I am, I thought that you would back off and not want to be involved as it is common knowledge that I am not a real woman? We will always be the butt of gossip and innuendo, it is not fair to ask you to put up with all that.”
“ Lexie, you may not have been born and raised as a girl, but you are as much a woman now as most others that I know. Let’s start again and see where it leads us, I will always be proud to have you by my side, no matter what.”
Just then we noticed that my attacker was stirring and groaning and I was worried that when he came fully round that he would be too big and strong for Jim to handle, but Jim just stood over him and shouted him
“Right you animal, you are drunk, but that doesn’t excuse what you have just done. You have two choices, either I call the police and you will end up with a long prison sentence, and I am sure that your fellow inmates will just love the fact that were about to rape a transgender woman, or you leave quietly and never come anywhere near Lexie again. If you do the whole village will get to know what a violent pervert you are, attacking someone who has been accepted by everyone around here and is extremely popular, you will be a laughing stock and a social outcast. It’s not just Lexie that you have to steer clear of. If we hear of any woman in the village being molested, this will all come out, from now on lay off the drink and keep your emotions in check”
He said nothing, just got up, rubbing the lump on the back of his head staggered out of the door and left.
Jim stayed the night to make sure that I was ok and we shared a bed for the first time, with him just hugging me and making me feel safe and protected. After that he was a regular stopover and we spent a lot of time together. He had decided that no matter what anyone else thought that he regarded me as a woman and treated me as such. As Josie knew that Jim had been waiting outside at the party, and asked me whether I had met him, I told her what had happened, how Jim had saved me from the attack and how we were now back together, hopefully for good. To save any further gossip in the village and just let me get on with my life, she promised to keep it to herself, not even telling our cousins.
Over the next few months a lot of time was taken up by the big wedding planned by Josie and Russell. I was surprised at the amount of effort and planning that Josie put into her big day. The obvious things like the church ceremony, the reception afterwards, and the honeymoon, were all arranged by her and Russell and their families, but Josie involved Julie, Jane, Jeanette, and me to a large extent in the selection of her wedding dress, our bridesmaid’s dresses, the flowers, how she wanted us to style our hair and what do for her ‘hen party’.
The weekend before the wedding the five of us went to stay in Newcastle and enjoyed a raucous time partying at the venues down on the quayside, one of the social centres of the city. Although we were all a bit older than most of the girls out on the town we joined in with the spirit of the place, going from bar to bar to club dressed up in matching quite cheeky and revealing mini dresses, with sashes showing pictures of Josie and Russell. By now the hormones had begun their work and I had no problems wearing the skimpy low-cut dresses revealing my now fairly obvious cleavage and to everyone we met I was just another one of the girls out for a good time.
Things calmed down for the rest of the week until the wedding day. Josie had a beautician booked to do her hair and makeup but the rest of us had early appointments at a local beauty salon, where we had the full makeover, hair, makeup, nails. By the time we left we were all looking so alike that I felt myself as one of their sisters. After a quick trip to collect our dresses we joined Josie to help her get ready, before putting on our dresses and shoes and escorting her to the waiting cars, one to take us to the church first and the main car for Josie and her dad.
We all made our way into the church and along with the others I nervously walked down the aisle behind Josie, wondering what those people who knew about me were really thinking, and whether it was appropriate for me to be taking attention away from Josie. After the ceremony we followed Josie and Russell into the vestry for the signing of the register and then processed back down the aisle being joined and escorted by Jim, Kelvin and Richard and James, the husbands of Jane and Jeanette. Amongst a lot of happy faces and lots of camera flashes. as we approached the door, in the back row, smiling and looking at me I saw Charlotte, dressed in her Edwardian ‘Sunday best’. She waved a hand at me and silently mouthed “Thank you Alexandra”.
The rest of the day, the reception and the evening party all passed in a bit of a blur, I was so caught up in the emotion of the day, and I wondered whether I would ever be going through anything like this myself. As we were seeing off Josie to go on her honeymoon, she pulled me close and whispered “Thank you so much for bringing us together, and just so you know, I saw Charlotte too as we left the church, she just gave me a big smile and mouthed ‘Good luck Josephine.”
Life soon returned to normal, my artwork sales were going well and although I had been worried that now my story was common knowledge, that my work would be shunned, it actually had the opposite effect. It created a lot of interest in the local area and the Maltby Arms was booked up with guests all through the Summer and Autumn.
I told the girls that after all the excitement I needed a break and that I had booked a long holiday and would be away in the far East for a couple of months and asked them to keep an eye on the lodge for me. Despite constant questioning I did not tell them where I was going, only that I needed a change.
I was actually back after 6 weeks and called them all together to the Lodge for an announcement.
“You look like you have had a good time Lexie, you are looking radiant and happy and relaxed, where have you been?”
“ There was something I had to do first, but then I had a few weeks in a spa retreat.”
“ Well it seems to have done you a lot of good, would you recommend it?”
“ I don’t really think it is your type of place, it runs special programmes for people recovering after
gender re-assignment surgery. to help them adjust to their new bodies.” there was a stunned silence for a while before Julie came over to me.
“ You haven’t?”
“I have. Now I really am one of ‘The Robson Lasses’, come here and lets’s have a girly group hug. it is something else to celebrate”
The end
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Authors notes.
The villages, towns, and features of Co. Durham and Northumberland are real, although the Maltby Arms does not exist. Robson is a common name in the area and the Graham family did own Killhope lead mine, but individual names and events are purely fictional.
For those of you that are interested in any of the places mentionedI have included a few links for further information, click link to open.
St John’s Chapel http://www.discoverweardale.com/explore-weardale/our-village...
Chapel Fell http://mynorthpennines.co.uk/hills-moor-fells/chapelfell-top/
Killhope https://killhope.org.uk/about-us/history/
Segedunum https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Segedunum#Subsequent_history
Hadrians Wall https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hadrian%27s_Wall
Appian way https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Appian_Way
Aqueduct of Segovia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aqueduct_of_Segovia
Pont du Gard https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pont_du_Gard