Stops for help. Problems come up.
And he's punished to behave and dressed as a girl.
=^_^=
It has been a wet spring and everyone’s tired of staying inside. I like video games as well as reading but I can only do so much of either. I’m a twelve years old boy with a great imagination that causes me to do more than kids older than me. The sledding hills of winter had been calling me to get out a disc and treat our sled hill as a water ride. That starts well as a good number of us have the same idea.
Most of the guys quit after it became muddy, but I see myself in competition with two guys who have just outdone me. I decided to give it one more time.
I take a longer, faster run, and make a great belly dive onto the disk. When my disk and I separate going down the hill, I pass the grassy area and into the muddy part before the pond. I make it back up to the top when someone dares us to run and take a sliding dive down the hill. It’s me against Jurgens and I won't back down from dares. Jurgens is a seventh-grader and I always relish beating someone older than me. It never happened enough to suit me.
Jurgens goes first and does well enough that I need to try my hardest, so I take a long run before I leap and dive headfirst onto my belly down the hill. I’m ready for the thud of hitting the ground. I keep my feet up so they wouldn’t drag me slowing down. I feel some mud go down my pants but I don’t mind as I’m easily beating out Jurgens.
It’s a little difficult to get up as my pants want to slide down my butt. Even my underpants are filthy. I have worn a new belt that I can’t tighten enough to hold up my pants. My older brothers got a ride but I too dirty for any car, even a policeman says I need to walk home. One doesn’t realize how far the home is on a regular walk? It becomes more apparent as I’m holding up muddy pants. I didn’t get tired until after passing school, so it is less than half a mile to home.
Okay, I am not as tough as I sound. I don’t mind crying because my face is too wet and filthy for anyone to tell. I don’t like the idea of asking for help but I still have ten blocks to go. And I know how I’ll be harassed by my brothers once I get there and might even be forced to stay outside until mom gets home.
I walk up and rang the doorbell at the Sinclair house. I know Trudy and Melanie’s Mom doesn’t work so she should be home. Trudy is a good three years younger than me; when she answers the door she just laughs and said, “We don’t want any.” I could hear her laughing as she goes running, calling her Mom. I wait. Melanie’s the one in my grade.
Mrs. Sinclair might not want to help me but I am pretty sure she will. I introduced myself, “Mrs. Sinclair, I am Timothy Martin and I need help getting home to 233 Rock Street.” I even cry a little, okay more, than a little.
Mrs. Sinclair says, “I don’t know what I can do to help you? You are way too muddy to ride in my car, plus I don’t have any clothes for a boy.”
“Do you want me to call your mother and see if she can pick you up and get you home?”
Sadly, I say, “My mom’s working and this morning she said, it was going to be a very busy, an important day. She told my brothers and me to make sure we didn’t get into trouble.” Mrs. Sinclair wants to giggle at my predicament but she doesn’t.
“So you are covered in mud, how does that go along with what your mother said?”
I told her, “Well, I am a boy and sometimes things just happen because I’m active. I didn’t mean it to happen. But when I was dared, I just had to run, jump and slide down Montrose Hill one more time. I didn’t know mud could weigh this much.”
When Mrs. Sinclair says, “Well.” I know she’s about to give in. I wait her out. “Okay, go around the back of the house and I will spray you down with a hose to get enough mud off of you. Hopefully, then you can make it home.”
I say, “Thanks.” I scoot around the outside of the house holding up my pants. Mrs. Sinclair shows up outside of the backdoor of her house. Melanie is close behind her. Melanie turns on the hose and her mother starts to spray me down. Between the hose lacking pressure and the dirt being clay and mud, not much of it is not coming off; my clothes are actually getting heavier.
Mrs. Sinclair says, “Melanie, go in the house, don’t look out here. I want you to start the water in the bathtub.” Melanie does so, as Mrs. Sinclair tells me, “Take off your clothes and take that bar of soap and wash yourself down. We’ll get you as clean as possible out here.”
I do try to leave my underpants on. I got a good start, but some of the mess has caked on and won’t come off easily. I’m as good as I’m going to get before I get too cold.
“Now wrap yourself in this large old towel. We’ll get you in the house and taking a good bath.” She says, “You have begun to turn blue; indicating you’re getting dangerously cold.”
I’m glad to have the large towel wrapped around me as I run into the house as she directs me to a bathroom. Mrs. Sinclair had me keep on my underpants until I got in the bathroom. Someone is already running the bathwater with some bubble bath. I drop my underpants on an old towel.
Mrs. Sinclair opens the door a crack and asks for my mother’s phone number.
She’s outside the bathroom door and I can hear her. “Is this Abbey Martin? …Hello, I am Mrs. Jodie Sinclair over on Maple Street. No, it isn’t an emergency as such, but your son Timothy did get himself into a predicament that needed help… Yes, he must have been sliding down the sledding hill and got himself covered royally with mud. It was bad enough that he could not hold up his pants any longer by the time he reached our house… Finally, I got him to the back of the house and tried to hose him clean, but finally, I had him get down to his underpants. They too were ungodly dirty, encased in mud as well. He is finally in the bathtub, hopefully getting clean as well as a warm-up. He had begun to turn blue while he was outside.”
“Abbey, I have one problem in that I do not have any clothes for a boy his size; I was wondering if I could have him wear some of my girls’ clothes until I get him home.”
I hear Mom say, over the phone, “Jodie that is fine with me, though I don’t like bothering you and your daughters. He won’t acknowledge it but he has had to do something similar when he’s been naughty. I just hope his brothers show a little mercy when you take him home.”
Mrs. Sinclair laughs lightly, “He doesn’t know yet about the clothes, but he did say his brothers would be mean to him.”
Mom tells her, “If he gives you any trouble just say: ‘Darby Sue’ that is enough and I am sure he will behave then. I wish I were free to get home as I don’t want his brothers to be cruel. …I’m sorry he’s being such a problem, but that is his problem, not yours.”
Jodie says, “Well if you trust me, he can stay here, have lunch and play with the girls. I am sure Trudy would like to have him to play with. I will have to keep Melanie well behaved so she doesn’t treat him like a Ken doll. He can stay here then until you pick him up. Is that alright with you?”
“That would be great, but I might be here until 5:30 and it will take me at least thirty minutes to get there if traffic’s good. I have no trouble trusting you or your husband Bill. I was over the Sinclair house a lot as I grew up.”
“If I wasn’t sure that Timmy was safe, I would already be in the car and on my way. It could cost me a job, but in today’s world I wouldn’t chance his safety,”
“Well, I suspect you need to get going and I need to get Darby Sue some clothes and feed my three girls some lunch.” Jodie closes the call, “You take the time you need; nothing is pressing here.”
The door to the bathroom again opens a crack. “Timothy, I am putting some clothes here it is the best I can do for now. I called your mother and she knows what has happened. She agrees about your brothers, so you will be staying here. You will be playing with the girls until she can pick you up.”
“Please wash really well, shampoo your hair, rinse it really well and use the conditioner, please do everything twice. You are to clean and rinse out the tub before you get dressed. Your mother doesn’t want you to be any trouble, do you understand?”
I said, “Yes, Ms. Sinclair I know I am already in enough trouble.”
I wash and get clean. It actually took a second tub of clean water to do the job. The second time I shampooed and rinsed my hair even better than the first time. The shampoo worked up a good lather after the first time and after I rinsed and conditioned it until it was squeaky clean.
When I get out of the tub, I clean the bathtub out and I rinse it twice as I was told. It’s not Mom clean but I can’t see the ring as I made sure the visible dirt went down the drain.
Once I get dried off, I get ready to put on the clothes left for me. ‘Yuck, underpants aren’t cotton or white. They don’t look like any underpants that I know. They’re a light lime green with pink trim. The tee shirt looks okay though it’s a soft pastel yellow. That’s when I saw the pink teddy bear on the front of it as I pull it over my head. That’s when I wondered if the panties are Trudy’s or Melanie’s. The blouse has a light pink bow and lacy edging at the top. There is no way I’m wearing this.’
I yell, “Mrs. Sinclair don’t you have some jeans and a plain top?”
“Darby Sue, your mother said you are to cooperate; do we have an understanding?” ‘No, my Mom didn’t tell her? Well, I knew she did by what Mrs. Sinclair said.’
I knew to put on the clothes and get on with the day. There’ a short blue jeans skirt that has embroidery work, angel’s wings on it. They are snug and I fixed my boy self, down there to minimize any pain from embarrassment.
I go out to the kitchen to see what I’m to do next.
“My, don’t you look nice. Let me get Melanie to help with your hair as I get lunch.” She calls out, “Melanie please come here with a styling brush, and we need your help.”
Melanie quickly comes and looks me up and down and is quite amused. “Let’s go to my room and I will brush out your hair. What is your name?”
“You already know my name.”
Melanie turned back to her mother, “Mom, Margaret, and some other girls are to come over this afternoon. This is already the third time I’ve invited them. I don’t want to cancel this time too.”
“Melanie, help with the hair. Tim can go to Trudy’s room and play with her; if he doesn’t want to be around you and your friends.”
Melanie’s Mom says, “Darby is that alright with you?” She wasn’t thinking of Melanie being there. Melanie takes my hand and shows me to her room. She has me sit in front of her and brushes out my hair. Without my realizing it, she uses two barrettes in my hair. “Why did Mom call you Darby?
Without thinking, “My Mom must have said something about when I get in trouble at home. They call me Darby Sue and I know to settle down and not cause any more trouble.”
Melanie asks, “Do they sometimes make you dress like a girl?” I become quiet, ignoring the question. “They do, don’t they? If you are around me and my friends this afternoon, it better be as Darby.”
I speak up, “It is bad enough that you know. I don’t want them seeing me, dressed in girl clothes. I would never hear the end of it.”
Melanie asks me, “Let me hear you sound like a girl.” I respond before I thought to say, ‘I don’t have a girl’s voice.’
“That is very good, you could pass for a girl. If you don’t say too much they won’t need to know you’re Tim. Now let’s go, I am sure my Mom has lunch ready.”
The name or calling one Darby Sue is unique to a certain community and people from there as a discipline used to modify poor male behavior and bring it back into line. It was their term for a modified form of petticoating. It began back in the mid-1800s. It is indicated here that the Rogers and the Sinclairs are two families that used the discipline. But they were not the only ones. It was known and accepted in the general community, and by-in-large, it was not to shame the person to others.
Trudy and Mrs. Sinclair are impressed with how I look. I assumed it was because I was much cleaner.
Lunch is salads with roasted chicken bites and something called tofu. Melanie says, “Tofu doesn’t have much taste but it helps with skin and cell growth.” Trudy suggests that the raspberry vinaigrette dressing is very good with the salad and tofu.
It’s a tasty lunch and much better than I usually have at home, but it wasn’t enough. I’m hungry and while there aren’t more salad or chicken bits, there is the tofu and with the raspberry dressing, it makes a small sundae-like dessert.
Mrs. Sinclair tells me to lie down and take a nap which I do. Trudy’s room has an extra bed, so that is where I lie down. I really didn’t expect to fall asleep; I’m surprised how easy I go to sleep.
Melanie with her girlfriends are now over making enough noise to wake me up.
I go to the kitchen to see what time it is. Melanie’s friend Susan comes over to me, and we introduce ourselves. “Hi.” Then she yells to others “…Hey Darby doesn’t have her nails painted. Melanie is quiet except for asking me, “Come sit down and enjoy Darby.” They chose a bright berry color for my fingers, and paint my toes a raspberry red and blueberry blue on every other toe.
Fifteen minutes later, Melanie’s Mom comes in talking on the phone, “I am sorry but everyone is going to need to go home, we have a family emergency. Trudy and Melanie, your Dad will meet us at Grandma Sinclair’s and we need to get going soon. Darby, you’re going to have to go with us or go home.”
Mrs. Sinclair says, “Darby, it would be an hour and thirty minutes before your mother can leave work and we are traveling in the other direction.”
I say, “But I can’t go home like this and a tee shirt. Have you washed my clothes, please say yes?”
She says, “If you would have gone ten minutes ago, but with your painted nails drying and mascara on, I don’t think it would be wise to take you home. And no, I had to soak your clothes before I could wash them. They finally went into the washer only minutes ago.”
She says, “Melanie, I need you to pack a few things for Darby Sue. We will have to buy some other clothes after we get there.” Melanie leaves taking me along to pack.
Melanie pushes me out of her room with a plastic bag, “Go make sure the car is clean from papers, bottle caps, and wrappers. Check the CDs to make sure they are on their correct covers. Then make sure you have gone to the toilet and have good shoes on.”
When I come back in Mrs. Sinclair wipes her eyes and she’s hugging her girls. There are three packed bags, and three dresses on hangers. I take the bags out to their Nissan Pathfinder and I open the back to put in the three bags I have. Mrs. Sinclair has the dresses and Trudy has another bag. Melanie is already in the front passenger seat, having brought out some drinks.
Melanie put in a Taylor Swift CD and Jodi Sinclair says, “Okay, let’s all sing along it will make the trip go faster. Melanie, Trudy, and Ma Sinclair sing that is until Melanie complains. Mom Darby isn’t singing.”
“Darby Sue, I’m asking you to sing-a-long with us.”
“That’s a girl singing, I don’t want to. I’m no good at singing anyway.” When she insists on Darby’s cooperation I sing. I do it with a funny voice to get my way intentionally, but Mrs. Sinclair becomes upset and wants me to sing properly.
She says, “You want to be silly. I’m sorry but I am not putting up with that Darby Sue.” We are on the edge of a city when she pulls into a Kohl’s parking lot. “I wasn’t sure if I was going to treat you as a girl or not. Now we will buy some clothes so you know enough to behave.”
We’re parked and she soon has me by the hand. “If you need to talk to me, I’m now mom Sinclair to you as well.”
She tells Melanie, “I want you to pick out a pair of panties your size with ruffles, and pick out three pairs for everyday use.” She looks at me, “You, young lady come with me.”
I say, “Can’t I get a pair of boy’s jeans and a sweatshirt?”
She says, “That was a possibility, but you indicated that you won’t behave. Now I need to be prepared to get your cooperation.” She picks up a dress and holds it up in front of me. It is a simple red dress with spring flowers.”
I say, “This is too girly, let me at least get some jeans that Melanie can wear later.” Jodi walks me to the changing rooms and Melanie is soon there. Jodi opens the package of panties and pulls out the pink pair. “Take these and go change into your dress. Make sure you have on that pair of panties. The dress might be a little short, you may want the protection of two panties to keep mean boys from laughing.” Melanie walks in with me to the changing room and I tell her to get out.
She says, “My Mom needs to have the tags because you’re wearing them to Grandma Cole’s. You might be a boy, but I am big enough to beat you in a fight. I will not put up with you making my Mom feel bad! Do you hear me, Darby Sue?”
I am pretty sure I could beat her up, but I knew better than to try.
She unbuttons the top of my blouse and loosens my belt. “You can turn around, so I don’ see your little boy thing.” I am ready to protest, but Melanie shows a fist. I turn around to take what I have on-off. I hear Melanie taking off the stickers as she hands me the pair of pink panties. They only have ruffles on one side which I guess are the back of the panties. I put the plain white panty inside it, I slip them on, and fix myself once again.
Melanie says, “Turn around and lift your arms. You can help me in putting on your pretty dress.” I have settled down and do as I’m told. “Good the dainty boy top will look nice under the dress.” She and I pull the dress down and I even help to smooth it out. Melanie says, “I take it your mother has a dress for you at your house?” She pauses until I acknowledge that I do have one. “Now turn around and I will button up your dress.”
She says, “You know you’re big enough that you should be wearing a training bra. You don’t want to look like you are my sister’s age. You’re too tall.” A pair of pantyhose are put under the door and Melanie tells me to sit down. She shows me how to roll up the legs to the toes. I place my foot in one at a time clear to the toe area. She guides me in rolling them up and keeping them stretched. She has me stop just below the knee. “Now begin the other foot and rolling up the other leg. Too bad you don’t have open-toe shoes, your feet look real pretty.” I had to put back on the pair of shoes I was wearing.
Melanie reaches in her purse, “Pout your lips.” I think of saying something, but Melanie stares like she is upset. I purse my lips and she uses a little lipstick on me.
She brushes my hair back how she likes it. And we leave the changing room.
Mrs. Sinclair says, “It looks like you are in the mood to behave, I’m glad. Now does anyone need to use the bathroom before we check out and go?”
“I need to, but I’m not going in the bathroom like this.” Mrs. Sinclair hands Melanie the bag with my clothes in them and she takes me into the women’s restroom. I look down as two teenage girls are primping themselves and I’m embarrassed. I go into the stall and I need to pull down my pantyhose and panty. And as I am, I need to sit down on the toilet seat to go. I only pee, but I hear Ma Sinclair whisper for me to wipe my front. It seems strange but I do it and drop the toilet paper into the water. I pulled up my panty and pantyhose, but don’t pay attention to it not feeling right.
I hurry out of the toilet to the sink and wash my hands. Mom is there when I turn around saying, “You didn’t take care of how you pulled up your pantyhose.”
One teenager is still there, “Be patient Mom, once she thinks of boys looking to see how pretty she is, she’ll learn better. She will learn to do a much better job.” The girl bends down to look at me, “Take it from me, you are pretty enough that the boys are already looking.”
I know I should say thank you so I do. She turned to Mom, “Would it be okay if I put a dab of blush on her cheeks?” Mom had said yes, the blush is soon in place and I’m turned around to see myself in the mirror. There is now little if any trace of Tim.
Melanie and Trudy are both smiling when they see me.
We are back in the car on our way to Grandma Coles. We’re singing and I am cooperating. Mrs. Sinclair receives a call from her husband, and Mr. Sinclair says, “I’m with my Mom but Grandma could use a woman’s touch.” So we go directly to the Sinclair home.
Mr. Sinclair has two sisters and their families that should be coming, but it will be tomorrow morning or late tomorrow before they’re each there. His sister Karen has two daughters both teenagers and one son who is twelve. Connie has a son and daughters as well as her husband Jeff. His cousin Marie was there and will be back, she needed to get her two girls from school.
We arrive and all of us have to go into the house. Ma Sinclair tells me to stay out of sight and not to talk to anyone. She didn’t give any reason and I’m nervous apart from Melanie. So I follow her as close as possible.
The elder Mrs. Sinclair is at least sixty-five but she looks much younger than my grandma. She cries in Ma Sinclair’s arms, “He was too young to die, I’m not ready for him to be gone.”
Seemingly he was ill and had an unexpected heart attack. His chair had a pad on it and everyone understands not to sit there, except me. Melanie and Trudy naturally go and hug their Grandmother. Grandma Katherine Sinclair noticed me and recognizes I came with Jodie and her granddaughters. She asks, “And who is this darling girl?”
When I’m introduced as Darby Sue Martin, Grandma takes a closer look. “She looks to be a girl to me; I’d suggest you call her just Denise or something else. If we call her Darby or Darby Sue, there are enough people around here who might wonder if she’s a boy.”
Grandma hugs me and then tells Melanie. “You know where the extra things are, go and help her to look the way she should for being thirteen.” I want to say ‘No’ but I knew it would have been rude and I’d get into trouble by not doing as told.
Melanie takes me to an extra room, saying, “We usually stay in this room, if we stay here. This time I suggest you take everything off. You should be wearing your panties over your pantyhose anyway.” I am soon naked and not even mindful that I should be embarrassed. I have my pantyhose and panty back on and Melanie has found a small bra. She holds it up for me to put my arms through the straps. And she helps hook it in the back and places a small sock in each cup.
Melanie looks at me, “So are you okay with being Denise or would you prefer Dana?” I say, “Shouldn’t it be Darby Sue.”
And Mel finally says, “You’re going to mess up with that. Let’s call you Danica Martin instead. You’ll be a distant cousin.”
The emergency is Mr. Sinclair’s father had died and those who are usually nearby are out of town and unable to be reached.
Jodi’s mom calls her Mom, and we’re on our way there. And Jodi tells her, “My Father-in-Law Larry died earlier in the day. Mom I’ve come up to be with Claire Sinclair until Paul’s Sister Karen can get there and the rest of them arrive tomorrow. I want to give her as much support as I can.
“Along with my girls, I’m bringing another girl.” She says, “Listen for a moment Mom, remember Abbie Hammer, she’s now Abbey Martin, her youngest, a daughter has come with us, to the Sinclair’s. …Her name is Darby… How did you know she’s called Darby Sue?
“I didn’t think she would have known about Kevin Sinclair. …So was it you that she got the idea from or us from them? …Well yes, as soon as I called her Darby Sue, she becomes precious. …Abbey told me she will have a credit line at two stores for me, plus a cash advance that I am to use for extras.”
‘’Yes Mom that would be helpful for me, you can take Danica and Melanie shopping tomorrow morning. I will have them ready for you by 9:30 a.m. …Okay they will be ready by 8:00 and go to breakfast with you. …Yes, her hair is long for a boy, but I don’t think she will like that idea. …I just don’t want any headaches with the funeral coming up or else I’d let him be Timmy.”
I swear as I get changed, I feel like I’m more girly, and that my body is turning soft. Melanie’s Grandmother Cole and Aunt Cherise come to pick us up. “You young women need to come with us and go shopping for clothes. I start to give them a hard time, but Aunt Cherise steps forward and lays down the law to me. “Listen cutie, my sister did you a favor and she now has enough to do. You are going shopping with me and we’re getting some pretty clothes for you. Need I remind you that on this trip you’re a seventh-grade girl?”
Her daughter Madison smiles as she helps me get to the car. She’s in seventh grade and I’m not sure she knows if I’m a boy or not. “My mother says you’re a goofy tom-boy that Aunt Jodi’s helping. Mom wants us to girlify you some more. So you’ll fit in.” We go to an apartment store to the young teen section. They have my mother’s approval to put things on her store card. Madison is the first in the store to ask me if I have a bra with me. This leads to the purchase of another bra and a bunch of panties. I try to refuse another pair of pantyhose. But it becomes another two pairs with my protest and a pair of stockings that are to stay up on their own. The result is I begin to cooperate.
Aunt Cherise and Madi take me to the cosmetic counter. This is not to be a major stop, but I do get two sticks of lip gloss and matching nail polish. Cherise gives my lips a nice coat of fresh lip-gloss as she calls it. I am not use to my lips feeling moist and a little sticky. With Aunt Cherise’s help, I try on a skirt and a print blouse that they’re purchasing for me. She wants me to wear my new bra. ‘My bra’ there was something terribly wrong with that and I told her.
I huffed once too often at Aunt Cherise. Soon we have two outfits and another dress; Aunt Cherise has me quickly in tow. I am not sure where I am going, but I’m fairly sure it is not good for me. Next door to the store is a salon and I’m soon in it.
“Now am I going to have your cooperation?” She then whispers, “Do you want people around here to know you’re a boy? You might be surprised that I know your Mom and your Grandmother and Grandfather Rogers.”
She steps back and awaits my answer to her original question about my cooperation. A woman name Debbie comes up to me. “Madi is already with April, so young lady I welcome you to our salon. Have you been to a salon before?”
“No, Mam.” I am now pretty sure she knows I’m not a girl. “But I’ve been told I need to cooperate and be a good girl.”
Debbie asks, “And what can I do for you?”
Not sure, I only know my mother usually talks about getting a permanent. “So I’m to get a permanent, but I don’t know more than that.”
Debbie hands me a magazine and turns it to a section of perms. “Are you sure a perm is what you want? There’s a good selection here but I don’t want to push one on you.”
I ask, “Do you mean I wouldn’t look good or that my hair's too short?”
Debbie says, “No, you have very pretty hair. I see you’ve shampooed it recently, but it doesn’t look like you’ve ever had your hair properly cared for. I can do most of those shorter styles in the magazine and a lot more. I just want you to be happy.”
I look over to Aunt Cherise and then start to browse the magazine. Thinking about when I go back home. I know I will be teased if and when my brothers ever find out. “I know I don’t want tight curls.” It takes a few minutes but I select three. “Ms. Deb, which of these will be easiest for me to take care of? I might be going to a funeral and I don’t want to be a fuss to others, but I’m not used to taking care of my hair.”
Debbie looks and points to one, “I think this would be both easy to care for and will look cute on you. What do you say, Cherise?”
Cherise says, “It’s her choice. I was going to select something simple, but that is a good choice.”
I say, “I once went with my mother when she went to a salon. A girl was having her hair done and the woman allowed the girl to hand curlers, pins, and combs to her.”
Deb’s face lights up, “Would you like to do that?” She said, “You have shampooed your hair recently, but I’d like to shampoo and use a good conditioner to add somebody to your hair. Would you mind if we do that first?”
It’s the first time someone is really treating me nicely and asking if something is okay. I like that. I say, “I’m glad I got you. I’m sure my mother will be happy that I got you to help me.”
Once she’s done conditioning my hair and has gotten some of the water out, she begins to comb it out. She’s put a tray of curlers and pins in my lap for me to hand to her.
She combs the front of my hair down over my face and cuts it straight across. “I am going to cut a little here and there to fit the style you desire.”
She brushes some goo onto areas of hair she has combed, curls it, and covers it with foil. I guess that is for the highlights I saw in the stylebook. I would have stopped her but after one was done, I thought she needed to do several sections.
I didn’t understand why Madison was done way before me. Cherise asks if she can go back to the store to shop with Madison. Deb says, “This young girl has twenty minutes under the drier as well as being combed out. You might as well go do whatever you need. She’ll be staying here with me.”
I pick up a fashion magazine and see various outfits and dresses, wondering which would look good on me if any. When Deb comes over to check on me, I ask her opinion. She asks me how many dresses and skirt outfits I have. When I say none. She says, “Oh, I can’t believe that is true.”
I realize it sounds like I’m destitute so I say something more. “We received an emergency call to come up here because my Aunt’s Grandfather died. I didn’t have any clothes there to wear. That’s why all this fuss I have to go through.”
Debbie says, “So others are paying for all these clothes and your hair appointment.”
“My Mom is going to cover it all and gave strict orders for me to behave. That isn’t usually very easy for me. Aunt Jodie seems like she has dealt with people like me. I am trying to relax and enjoy all this. I just don’t want others back home finding out about what I’m having to do. My reputation would be shot.”
Debbie says, “With the way you’re behaving it looks like you’re enjoying yourself. Or do I have that wrong?”
“I do kind of like it but you can’t tell anyone else, especially when I protest a little.” Debbie agrees it will be our secret.
To be continued…
Danica’s a Darby Sue
Stopped for help and problems came up.
My Mom told Jodie about Darby Sue
=^_^=
Mrs. Jodi Sinclair teased me when she saw I had been to the beautician and got more clothes. “You know if you had stayed quiet and didn’t let people see you. I was going to get you some clothes so you could be Tim again. But ‘oh no,' you had to go and introduce yourself and be seen by others. Now that’s how you’ll stay until after the funeral. You better hope your mother doesn’t bring your brothers when she comes.”
Jodi had gone back to stay with her husband and her mother-in-law. I protested when her mother, Grandmother Cole told me to go to the bedroom and get in bed. I tried arguing telling her what programs I stayed up to watch. She wasn’t interested if it was true or not; she wanted my cooperation. After I went to the bedroom; I didn’t do what she wanted. Instead, I snuck down to their finished basement to watch TV.
She somehow found me, “Okay, if you’re wanting to be a big girl you can hold this washcloth with ice behind your ear.” She had gone to her room and brought back some things in her hands. When I told her my ear was starting to freeze she had me move it to the other ear. She soon poked my ear with a needle clear through and soon she had an earring in its place. I complained and began to take the ice and cloth away. “That’s fine. You better pray that this old woman lines up the mark right. She poked that ear, placed in it the earring, and put its back on. Then she took me to a mirror. Standing behind me she asks, “Don’t you look pretty and look like you’re an older girl? My daughter says you’re to be thirteen; most thirteen years old’s have their ear pierced.”
“Not boys,” I said.
“You’re a Darby Sue girl who still needs to grow up. Come upstairs and I’ll take care of your fingernails since you want to stay up. What you have on is little girl polish; I suspect it was Trudy’s.” She says, “I have a sixteen-year-old granddaughter who helped me to learn today’s fashions. With that she began tending to my fingers; she took care of cuticles and took off the little girl polish. She was filing, shaping, and finally painting my nails twice, buffing them, and putting a finishing coat on them.
It was now late and I was tired and wanting to go to bed, but she had me stay up and watch the late news with her. I hate watching the news. I only do it to see the sports report. Grams took me up to go to sleep just as my part was coming on at the end. “See you in the morning, Danica. It is nice to come to know you.” She kissed me on the cheek and tucked me in. "I hope we can be friends."
My brothers said that Mom use to kiss us goodnight, but by the time I was three and sleeping in with them it stopped. Here I was just about twelve and supposed to be a thirteen-year-old girl and a grandma gave me a goodnight kiss.
Melanie and her cousin woke up before I was awake and Melanie was on top of me waking me up. “Time to wake up Danica, Sugar Poo. I like the makeover you got from Grandma.” She had a pair of girl’s panties waving in her hand like she was riding a play horse. Just as I was getting angry and going to dump her off onto the floor. She said, “No, no! Don’t lose your temper, remember you’re a sweet girl now.”
I grabbed the pair of panties and put them on while I was under the covers. Melanie was soon off handing me a short denim skirt and a pretty padded bra. I was going to put them on without a fuss, but Melanie said I needed to shower first. She handed me a robe and led me to the bathroom shower.
She stepped out only long enough for me to get into the shower. She said, “I and my Mom shouldn’t need to remind you all day you’re a girl, Danica. You won’t want us calling you Darby Sue around here. If you forget just go and look into a mirror or look down at your fingernails.” Part of me wanted to cry, however, I didn’t want to give Melanie any satisfaction. She stayed to help me dry my hair and to get it brushed out without tangling.
Her cousin Lisa, a true thirteen-year-old girl, now took me in tow. “You’re going to be with me and my friends so that the Sinclairs can be together at their other grandma’s. I want you just to watch us closely and figure out what you’re to be doing. And among other things, you should have a make-believe boyfriend.”
I wanted to be with the Sinclairs, but I knew that they needed to focus on Grandmother Sinclair.
Lisa selected two skater dresses for us to wear, which made me even more nervous. Like Lisa, her friends were very attractive, And once we were at the mall, they attracted many boys as admirers as we started to walk. Like Lisa had mentioned her girlfriends talked a lot and included me in discussing boys. We would look at the boys and the girls talked about which were cute and kissable. Jennifer, who was in eighth grade, called one boy forward and asked him if he would kiss her? Which he did but it was hardly more than a quick kiss. It ended up being on the corner of her lips.
Lisa quietly asked me, “Danica have you ever kissed a person of the opposite sex? Before you agreed that Jonathan there was cute, but instead of saying ‘kissable’ you acted shy and said ‘huggable’. So remember Jon was chosen by you, so I think he should be asked to be your friend as we walk around the mall. That way you’ll look important.” I stuttered as tried to speak Jennifer says, “That’s settled. Hey Jonathan how would you like to meet Danica and be with her while we walk around the mall?”
Jonathan stepped forward and then paused to think. Then Jennifer says, “That’s settled, get over here and introduce yourself to her. You gotta agree she’s pretty and squeezable as you already have your arm around her waist.”
Jonathan comes over and introduced himself. He’s fifteen and in ninth grade. He plays baseball and basketball. He likes that I know about both. He says I’m too small to play either in high school. But then he remembers I’m a girl and have two more years to grow.
He knows the Sinclairs and Melanie’s cousins. We walk around the mall and I look at clothes when the other girls do. By the second store Jon was putting his hand around my waist, this time it was Lisa who noticed him. I was unsuccessful in hushing her. She opened the lipstick that I agreed I was pretty. I thought she would put it on me, but no. She handed it to me and used another red stick to outline my lips. Then she told me to start from the middle and fill in my lips. “Watch yourself and make sure you’re careful and do it well.” It was kind of fun to do it once even if I’m only pretending to be a girl.
Lisa found a dress she liked and I agreed that it was cute. That became my first experience shopping as a girl and trying on clothes. Lisa was ready to buy the dress for me. It did fit well and looked good on me, but I spoke up. “I don’t mean to be unappreciative, but there was that mauve-pink skirt that I liked better.” Lisa giggled and we went and found the skirt and the proper size. She pointed to a blouse that would be nice with it. I had to try on both, but Lisa was patient and enjoyed the fact that I was cooperating.
Lisa was taking both the dress and the skirt ensemble to the register when I questioned her do so. She giggled, “I was supposed to get you at least two outfits and you agreed to both. I appreciate you helping to make this easier than I expected.”
She checked my face and told me I did a great job with my lipstick. We were impressed that I didn’t mess it up when I tried on the clothes.
Then Jennifer asked Lisa, “Has your friend ever been kissed?”
I spoke up for myself, “Aunt Jodi told me I couldn’t that I’m too young and don’t have my mother’s permission.”
Jennifer looks around and then asks Lisa, “Do you see her Aunt or Mother here?”
Lisa looks around giggles and says to Jennifer, “I don’t see Aunt Jodi and I’m sure her Mom isn’t here yet. She probably won’t be here until tomorrow.”
Jennifer calls Jon over and asks him if he likes me and again if he thinks I’m pretty. She says, “Do you know those pretty lips have never been kissed by a good-looking boy like you. How come? I think you should kiss her.”
Jonathan walks over to me and smiles. He asks, “Would you mind if I kiss you?” And I stand there in shock at the idea.
Jennifer’s getting frustrated, “Just tell her you’d like to kiss her. If she doesn’t say no, give her a hug and a nice kiss.”
I can’t believe it, but I don’t want to look like a nerdy girl so I don’t say anything. Jonathan puts one hand on my waist and the other on my chin. I see him moving to kiss me and as his eyes start to close, I close mine and we kiss. It wasn’t much but his lips were warm and soft as they pressed against mine. We kissed, and inside I’m screaming, ‘I just kissed another boy!’
I looked at Lisa and I could tell she said, “Oh my!” We hugged and then looked into each other’s eyes. He pulled me to him and we hugged. He licked his lips and told me that was nice. He said, “I hope you won’t mind that your first kiss was with me.”
I then looked around and it was then that I saw my Mom. She smiled and waved to me when our eyes met. I’m afraid and then hoping that she hadn’t seen the kiss. Mom comes up to me, saying, “I just got here and they said you’d be here. I wasn’t sure if I would find you or even recognize you if I did?” I could see Lisa scratch her head wondering why she wouldn’t recognize me, her daughter.
Mom realized the same thing and said, “I heard you dressed up and weren’t looking like a tomboy. I was not surprised about how pretty you are Danica.”
Jonathan was standing there like a deer in the headlights. I said, “Mom, Jonathan here was walking around with me so I wouldn’t be the only girl alone.” They both shook hands, I knew Jonathan had wiped his lips on his sleeve, hoping there was no trace of lipstick on him.
Lisa came up and introduced herself and then said. “Mrs. Martin, I’m Lisa Cole. I was told to amuse Danica and keep her busy as the Sinclairs had to leave her with us. …We’re planning to go see a movie here tonight. It was for Danica’s sake, so I hope she can still come.”
My mother asks if I’ve been having fun and made friends. Trying to be careful not to hurt feelings. I said, “Yes.”
Mom was thinking, “Well we’ll need to pick up your things and take them over to my parents’ house. We’ll be staying there. What time is the movie?” The movie was to start at 7:15. Mom says, “Well, we’ll need to leave now if we’re to get back on time. I hope your family won’t mind my waiting until tomorrow to visit.”
Mom checked with the other girls and knew where and when we’re to meet them
Mom was amused as we were walking to the car with my clothes. “I heard you were trouble now and then and earned your way into the clothes purchased for you. I think we will need to stay and make good use of them.”
“Mother you don’t know how embarrassing all the things I have been through. Did you see what I just had to bear?”
“I don’t want to hear your trouble right now, we’re on a tight schedule… You know, I wasn’t going to believe it, until I saw it. You chose to get a permanent instead of just getting your hair shaped or style. It does look cute on you. I can at least compliment your good taste. …Did you hear Jodi Sinclair say that if you had stayed quiet and out of sight. You’d have been back to being Tim, but 'no' you couldn’t be quiet or stay out of sight.”
“I think I will enjoy having a daughter for a short time. Do you remember when you were very young like three years old and you would put on one of my blouses and act like my little girl?”
I said, “You’re making that up. I did no such thing.”
We are soon to Jodi’s side of the family and we pick up my belongings. “Cherise was correct in saying you got some nice clothes. That petite blue dress will do well for visitation and the funeral. That is unless we decide you can’t wear the same outfit for both times. A funeral is not a time to worry about fashion. We’ll just see what other clothes you have to choose from.”
We’re soon to Grandma Rogers and Grandpa is quick to tease me, “Well, don’t you look pretty Darby Sue. Is that a wig or did someone go ahead and do your hair young missy?” I run at grandpa and try to hit him but he has long arms and holds me away at arm’s length. “Well, there you are even trying to fight like a girl who doesn’t know better.”
Mom tells me to get upstairs and take a quick shower and change. Then she speaks to her dad, “Dad, please don’t go teasing him like that. I’m going to discipline him this time, and I don’t want you to be mean about it. He already feels you favor his brothers.”
Mr. Rogers says, “The boys are old enough I can do things with them. This would have been his first time.”
“Dad that excuse hasn’t been valid the last three years. He is no sissy. He puts up with enough from his brothers and you fuel they're being mean at times. We will go stay at a hotel if you can’t treat him well.”
Grams followed me up to the guest room I usually stay in. She says, “I’ll get after your Grandfather after I help you two to get on your way. Your second brother was one to push his boundaries and get discipline like this. Sometimes when he’s here, the three of us will have to talk about what he had to do. He was about eight and up to the same age as you now.”
Grams helped me pull off my dress and patted me to get into the shower. She gave me a shower cap and helped to pin my hair up under it.
I could hear her and my mother talk about the clothes I had gotten. Their voices drop, “I am surprised they were able to get him into this short skater dress… We’ll have him wear this skirt tonight and see if he complains.” I wasn’t able to hear all that they were saying, but I was happy that Grandpa stopped being mean.
Once I’m out of the shower and drying myself off. Mom comes in to help me. “I’ll help get your hair looking nice… This lipstick and small makeup kit, who bought that for you?”
“Jennifer saw it. Lisa and she told me I had to buy it so I did. They were treating me like a thirteen-year-old girl.”
“And you make a rather cute thirteen-year-old girl.” I turned away from her as Mom watched as I put on a new pair of panties and then the training bra. She wanted to know how I decided to hide my little self.
“I think it was pure survival Mom. I was afraid I’d get excited at the wrong time and embarrass myself and the Sinclairs. …I’m sorry I was trouble for them, especially when this happened.”
I continued, “But I was angry when you told Mrs. Sinclair about me being Darby Sue. She and Melanie were pretty nice to me. Now Grandma Sinclair and Aunt Cherise know about me.”
I couldn’t believe the short skirt she and Grams made me wear. Mom says, “Like this afternoon you’re wearing these pretty leather strapped shoes. How do you like 2½” heels?” Mom wasn’t waiting for an answer, but rather complimented how well I looked in them.
It amuses me that I like getting compliments on how I look. Grandma asks me how I talked with the others this afternoon. And I went back talking like Danica. My mother said “Grandma, I heard her talking this afternoon before she saw me. I was surprised how convincing of a girl she makes.”
We were on our way back to the mall when I asked. “Mom you said you watched me before I knew you were there. I suspect you saw Jonathan and me.” I didn’t say anything more.
Mom acknowledges, “Yes, I saw you two kiss. I know it wasn’t your idea. I thought you handled it as well as possible. We can talk about it sometime. What did you think of your first kiss?”
“Mom, is it true that people remember their first kiss?”
Mom says, “You first tell me what you thought of his kissing you.”
I said, “I thought only girls were to feel soft, warm, and mushy. I thought he was nice and considerate for a boy.”
“So you, kind of liked it,” Mom said.
“Mom it was by a boy of course I didn’t like it.”
“Well, I only said that because of the look on your face then.”
Lisa was there by the time we got to the theater entrance. Then I heard another voice I recognized, “Woe, Dan-i-ca! Aunt Cherise said you bought some nice clothes. But she wasn’t sure you’d wear them.” Melanie came up and hugged me. “I gather you decided to find out what being a girl is like. Don’t worry it will be our secret back home,” she whispered to me.
Jonathan walked up to me and said to Melanie. “I’ve been asked to be her friend for today.” Melanie introduced herself, telling Jonathan that I had come with her family. He said, “She must be a very good friend of yours then.” Melanie was nice to agree.
Melanie took me to the women’s room saying I should use the toilet before the movie so I didn’t get too nervous. She knew my mother was here but was surprised she let me use makeup. It was then I noticed how pretty Melanie was and that was without much makeup. She looked like a girl of twelve like both of us should have been.
When we went into the movie theater, I was going to sit with Melanie and others. Jennifer and Lisa pulled me away saying, “Those of us with a boy sit several rows back so they don’t look at us. It allows us to feel more relaxed.” There were four of us girls with a date.
‘Ugh me with a boy as a date,’ I thought to myself. For a chic flick, the movie was kind of good. I turned to say that to Jon, but I guess he had been staring at me waiting for me to look his way. He gave me a kiss that hit the corner of my lips. He apologetically said, “I hope you don’t mind.”
I was thanking him for being polite. He took it to mean I liked him kissing me. He kissed me again, and now and then during the rest of the movie. It wasn’t like I was trying hard to kiss him back; it was more like a natural response to being kissed. The movie was about to end and I suggested I might want to refresh my makeup. When I looked in the purse for my lipstick, I found a compact case. It allowed me to clean off the smeared lipstick and apply some again. Somehow for some reason, I felt girly like I was a girl.
Just then I felt Jonathan’s hand on my leg and reacted, slapping his hand and saying “No!” It was loud enough that Melanie turned around and looked at me. At that point, I was naive enough that I didn’t know why Jonathan would do that. It just felt wrong.
The movie was over and I was back with Melanie and Lisa waiting for our moms. Lisa told me not to tell our parents what just happened that they would be angry with us.
The next few days went quickly as there always seemed to be something to do. My Mom was about five years older than Jodi and her husband Bill. She knew an older brother to Mr. Sinclair and that he too had been disciplined as a Darby Sue. Dan Sinclair didn’t talk to me but from his stare; I knew he was amused to see me behaving.
Melanie and I became good friends as it allowed Melanie to act like an older girl. Mom and I, not being close to the family, were free to help with smaller things. That ended up including watching a baby during the visitation and then helping out at the funeral luncheon at the church. My Mom and I got quite a few compliments on my helping the women of the church.
Jennifer, as a friend to the family, found herself stuck helping along with me. Jennifer giggled, “You know you’re going to make it harder on others of us when you leave. If other girls are asked to help in the future, you know it is you I’m going to blame.”
I said, “I can’t help it. Every time I act up, things go against me. I’m behaving so I don’t get into more trouble.” Jennifer giggled and we became better friends.
We had stayed until two days after the funeral. Mom made sure her bills were paid and everyone was reimbursed for their expenses in helping me as Danica. Monday started Spring Break here and at home. My Dad decided to take my brothers to see baseball teams play games during spring training.
My punishment for breaking rules and becoming a muddy mess was to be my Mom’s daughter through spring break. We didn’t just stay with her parents or the girls I became friends with. After the second day, I stopped protesting as we were having a good time together. Mom took me sightseeing and among other things to a women’s professional basketball game. We went to museums and a home and garden show. We entered one department store where the beautician chose me for a makeover. Mom and I were given a certificate for meals for two as a reward for doing so. It was my next to last day fully as a girl but Mom bought makeup, saying she’d use it on me someday.
My girl clothes went to the back of a closet in a clothes storage container where my dresses and more could hang out of sight. I am not sure where my makeup and other things went.
After that weekend several things happened: The clothes bought for me were hidden away by my mother, and Melanie and I had become friends, not like boyfriend girlfriend, just good friends. I would do more things with her and her friends. And come the summer I searched and found the clothes mom hid away. But I knew to be discrete.
There was once in August that my mother came home and found me dressed as Danica. Up to then, only Melanie and Mrs. Sinclair knew I was still dressed as a girl. Mrs. Sinclair thought my Mom knew, because I told her, “I wouldn’t do such a thing without my mother’s permission.”
My Mom knew I was going over to the Sinclairs so once she decided to call Jodi Sinclair, saying, “I hope that Tim’s coming over there isn’t a problem. I am surprised that he hasn’t become a nuisance.”
Mrs. Sinclair said, “I was afraid at first their being friends would be hard on Timothy. He’s mellowed out and become a tender boy and I’m thankful he has your understanding.”
It was after that my mother became suspicious that more was happening. Dad and my brothers went ocean fishing. And I had told her I’d go over to some friends. She called home at noon and when I answered she hung up quickly and decided to leave work early.
Finding I dressed as Danica, she decided to take me where we could visit alone but still be in a public place. She didn’t want to say or do anything she’d regret. I was embarrassed when Audrene a friend of Melanie’s came over and said hello.
She said, “Mrs. Martin, I knew she was Timmy. Because I see him go over to Melanie’s house, but when I go to play with Melanie and Danica; Tim is not there.”
Before going home, I and my mother stop and talked to Jodi and Melanie. The whole truth came out. My mother had liked the improvement she had seen in me her son but wanted the crossdressing to stop.
I started seeing a child psychologist after that. And I had stopped cross-dressing. I only did it with supervision for the next two years at Halloween time and two other times. I learned could be friends with Melanie and her friends without needing to pretend to be a girl...
Story to be continued…
Time Changes, but Not Everything
Stopped for help; bad boy makes it worse…
Time has passed and Tim tried to change…
=^_^=
I should have shared about the name or calling one Darby Sue is unique to a certain community and people from there was a discipline used to modify poor male behavior to bring him back into line. It was their term for a modified form of petticoating. It began back in the mid-1800s. It is indicated here that the Rogers and the Sinclairs are two families that used the discipline. But they were not the only ones. It was known and accepted in the general community, and by-in-large, it was not to shame the person to others.
It was now two years later and I had taken a liking to being around Melanie which was different from when we barely knew each other as classmates. I didn’t dress too much and I was pretty much in control of what and when I did that.
I was in eighth grade when I got in trouble with a teacher. She got in a little bit of trouble when she explained Marti Gras, by having me overtly dressed as a girl. I had acted up in the class a week earlier and took a zero on a quiz. Doing this restored my grade to an ‘A’. I dressed as a girl, overdid my makeup, and had bead necklaces to give out. Someone complained and the teacher was told she and I were too zealous.
It wasn’t until I was sixteen that my being comfortable acting like a girl would be put to a bigger test. There was that Halloween in October when Mom and the Sinclairs, Melanie and her mother, had me use girl clothes for my costume. Our high school had a costume dance. Melanie was a woman superhero and I was dressed with makeup to look like Melanie in regular life.
Melanie had the most fun when someone would complain that I didn’t use much of a costume. And she would say really loud, “You think that’s not much of a costume for him?”
They would respond, “But she can’t be a boy she is too pretty and natural.”
Melanie would pull me skipping away, “Yes, isn’t she.” I got hassled at the Halloween dance when some boys had me dance with them.
Unknown to most, I started to dress in some of Melanie’s old clothes before then. Melanie wasn’t to have known as I had bought some of her clothes that her mother was selling. I had actually bought some items and hid them away.
Melanie approached me as she had wanted one of the items I had taken if I hadn’t worn it... It was two weeks later that Melanie asked, “Did you wear my bluish-grey skirt with my white sweater?” I began to answer before I caught myself and stopped, but she knew I had.
We were in tenth grade by now and she just turned sixteen the week before. Melanie approached me about doing a favor. “You know who Harrison Deters is, don’t you?”
“Dah! Of course, I do.” He’s a football, basketball, and baseball star two grades ahead of us. He’s well-liked in the school. He has some differences that have come to light as he’s grown up. He’s such a good student, a very good athlete, and very well-liked that it hasn’t changed him.
Melanie tells me, “His mother has cancer and is afraid she’s going to die without seeing her son take a girl to the prom.”
Another ‘dah!’, while probably not everyone knows Harrison is gay, nor pushed it in his mother’s face. His mother was again hoping he would take a girl to the prom. “Well, he’s my cousin,” Melanie said, “And I thought of you. My Mom and I talked to him and his Mom, suggesting I could find a boy who liked dressing as a girl sometimes. I told them you even present yourself as a pretty girl.”
“You told them what? How dare you tell them about me?”
Melanie and her Mom stopped me. “No one told them who you are. But both Harrison and his mother are open to the idea.”
Mrs. Sinclair said, “Now Timothy, I talked to your mother and told her we would talk to you about this. So what do you think about dressing up as Danica or Darby Sue?”
I said, “I would definitely not do it as Darby Sue.”
Melanie said, “So okay it will be Danica.”
“Hey!” I said aloud, “I haven’t agreed to do it. I just said I’m not a Darby Sue. My brothers had given me a hard time when I dressed as a girl for Halloween. They still don’t know about me.”
It was a day that Harrison wasn’t home that Melanie and Jodi Sinclair took me to see Christiane Deters, Harrison’s mother. It wasn’t one of her better days as she was undergoing chemotherapy treatments, hoping against hope. I had seen her before at sporting events and around town but that was over a year ago when she looked nice and was thought to be healthy.
I introduced myself, “Hello Mrs. Deters, I’ve seen you before, but I’m sure you can’t remember everyone in town.” She smiled and said she was glad to meet me. I felt bad for her and it was me who said, “I’m the teenager Melanie and her mom told you about. I don’t dress as a girl very much and I haven’t gone out in public.”
Mrs. Sinclair interjects, “It’s not that he couldn’t, because he makes a very pretty girl.” She has me stand and Mrs. Deters looks at me and takes my hand asking me to turn around.
“You have fine features for a boy. You say you have dressed as a girl. Does that mean you like boys?”
“Definitely not,” I said that quickly! Melanie coughed but restrained herself from saying anything at that moment. I calmed down.
She said, “I definitely don’t want to embarrass my son. You would need to be quite presentable as a girl. Would you be willing to dress like a girl so Harrison and I could see you?”
Jodi Sinclair said, “Sis, Melanie brought some clothes that are out in the car. If Timmy would be willing we could have him dressed as a girl in about thirty minutes.”
Mrs. Sinclair apologizes to me for putting me on the spot. I said, “It’s actually better this way before I have time to work myself up and get awfully nervous.”
Melanie goes out to their car to retrieve an outfit. Mrs. Deters gets up thanking me. “I will go put on some water for tea. You could also have a soft drink if you rather. Is it okay if I call Harrison home?”
I went and changed in Mrs. Deters’ room because it also had an attached bathroom. I was surprised when Melanie came in and took the plastic off of her outfit. It was a very pretty knit dress that Melanie got this winter. There was no way I was going to do it justice. I loved it when Melanie wore it. I even dreamed of wearing it but never expected it to happen.
It was a simple enough change. I put on a new pair of panties and wore a pretty bra underneath. I had never worn pantyhose tinted pink, but they did soften my look. Mrs. Sinclair quickly styled my hair as Melanie helped me with the makeup. I wanted to stay with the ordinary lipstick, but Melanie said for the prom you’d need to wear glossy lipstick, so let’s do that.
It was all quickly done and I was afraid it wouldn’t look good until they had me look in a full-length mirror as we went back out. “O my.”
Mrs. Deters came over to have a good look at me. She had just put some small plates and cups on the table. Without a change in expression, she said, “You do make a very attractive young woman, but it takes more than looks to pass.” She had us sit around the table and I was having tea and being in conversation with them.
Melanie whispered to me, “Wet your lips before drinking from the cup.” I forgot why but I did as suggested.
Christiane as she had us calling her, said, “That was really good you didn’t leave a glob of lipstick on the cup.” She commented on my sweeping my skirt under me, my voice like a girl, and keeping a conversation with them. We were visiting when their eyes went looking behind me and over my head.
Harrison spoke, “I got through with practice and came home to check on you, as you asked Mom. I didn’t know you’d have some people over. I thought you hadn’t felt up to it this morning.”
He stepped around my chair and began to say hello to everyone. “I’m Harrison I’m sorry but I don’t know who you are?” He extends his hand as I try to stand. His look changes as he’s wondering who I am.
I introduced myself as Danica. Harrison said, “You make a good-looking girl, but you’re the person my cousin was talking about. I have trouble believing you’re not a real girl trying to deceive me into thinking you’re a boy.”
My voice cracks as I say, “That’s okay because I’m not crazy about the idea.”
He took a hold of me with his hands first on my waist.
“You’re Melanie’s friend Timothy, aren’t you? I once thought of asking you over, but I wasn’t sure how you would react.” It surprised me that Harrison knew who I was let alone thought about me as a possible friend. “I’ve not befriended a guy liking to dress like a girl.”
I said, “Not to offend you, but I was just thinking of dressing as a girl so you might go to the prom as your mother wanted you to please her.”
“So we would go just so a photo is taken? How about dancing and smiling and I being able to have fun and a good time?” Harrison sounded like it wouldn’t be satisfactory for him.
His cousin Melanie speaks up, “Danica can dance and have a good time. She’s even kissed a boy before.” I wish she hadn’t said that. “Why don’t you two go on a date and see if it is possible to enjoy being together.” Melanie says, “You’re open to that aren’t you Danica?”
Harrison looks at me saying, “I’d be willing. It would even be a necessity to make sure it would work. A prom’s too expensive for it to go sour. He’d have to buy a prom dress, shoes and stuff. I’d be paying his ticket and mine, getting a tux and more.”
Christiane Deters said, “I’d like to say I would help pay for the dress. But with all the medical expenses it will be hard enough helping Harrison to go.”
I said, “It’s not like I have a sister or someone I could borrow from. I do have a cousin, but that would require her and others knowing about me.”
Everyone looks at me, and someone says, “Your family doesn’t know about you?”
Harrison says, “You need to go to an LGBT support group. Well, you should go for your own good. I even know a good one the next county over.” Harrison pauses and I’m getting really nervous.
He says, “Forget about the other stuff. I ain’t going to worry about that. Are you willing to dress up and go on a date? We could go see a ball game in the city or something.”
I had hoped Harrison wouldn’t be willing and the gesture would be just that. But I also suspected if Harrison said yes; something like a time out would be needed. It was the beginning of the baseball season so one of the two teams in the city should be playing. I’d like the game idea and there wouldn’t be anyone we knew.
I said, “How about a week from this Saturday?” ‘Hopefully, my mother will say no.’ I turned to Melanie, “You got me into this, so you need to help me in getting something proper to wear.”
Mrs. Deters said, “I made some fish that I can hold down and I need the nourishment. It would be a nice treat to have some company eating. I’m still a good cook, you should enjoy it.”
Mrs. Sinclair agreed for the three of us. She said, “You’ll love her cooking she is a good cook. You three go relax and have some fun. I will help in the kitchen.”
Melanie volunteered, “Two of us can help set the table and clean up.” Harrison said, “I’ve been doing all that and more every night. I could use a break.”
Melanie said, “I was thinking of Danica. She’ll be wanting to get into girl mode again anyway.”
We turned on the TV and Melanie took the single chair with the best view of it. That left the couch. It wasn’t too bad sitting there as Harrison was wanting to get to know me and was good at conversing. He actually got me to talk about the first time I dressed up as a girl and why. He laughed commenting, “But you must have done it some time since then. Melanie was pretty sure you could still look good as a girl.”
Mel said we needed to set the table. I was hoping that would stop the conversation. Harrison didn’t help us but he did come and continue our visit.
When we finally sat down to eat, Harrison told his mother most of the things he learned about me.
When it came time to clean up and clean the dishes Mrs. Deters came out to the kitchen. When the opportunity came up, she asked to talk with me. We were alone for a minute and she asked, “I know you’re a boy and all that. But you seem to converse fairly well as a girl. This is asking more than I have a right to, but I was wondering sometimes if you could come over as Danica and talk to me. It would help you to be speaking as a girl again. And I would enjoy talking to another woman, especially a young high school girl.”
It seemed strange, but then everything about this time seemed strange. I wasn’t intending on saying yes, but I did. I even said, “Seeing how it will be a week from Saturday, we’re going to the ballgame. How about this Saturday or Sunday afternoon if I came over for a visit?” I couldn’t believe I was saying that.
I even turned to Melanie and said, “Would it be okay if I came over to your house to change?” She hadn’t listened in so we had to explain what we agreed to. Melanie had a smile of surprise but quickly said. “You better plan on Sunday afternoon. I’m sure we could help then.”
With everything done, including a good visit we were set to leave. Harrison asked if he could talk to me and so we went into a hallway for privacy. He shook his head, “Tim Martin, I can’t tell you how surprised and thankful I am. I know this might not work out or you might back out. This was really nice that you came over today.”
He gave me a small hug and as I looked up at him. I commented on all his Mom was going through. And then said, “For all you’re going through I haven’t heard of you complaining or say woe with me at school. That’s very impressive.”
On the way back to the Sinclair’s, Melanie and her mother complimented me numerous times. Mrs. Sinclair had also called my mother to pick me up after I changed. I could hear their short conversation about how things went. I guess she had sent my Mom a picture of me.
I went and changed in Melanie’s room, not realizing Melanie was changing in her bathroom to get ready for bed and to finish her studies. I had changed out of everything except my panties. Melanie came in saying, “I think you even impressed my cousin. I didn’t think Harrison was going to agree to it. And then I thought you were going to back out. You actually agreed to do way more, than I would have imagined.
Melanie ponders out loud, “I’m wondering if your mother would be open to taking us shopping Saturday for some clothes for you. My mom’s already agreed to buy two outfits for you.”
I’m quickly saying, “I’m not going to get any kind of a wardrobe again.”
“Do you already have clothes for visiting with Mrs. Deters Sunday and going to a baseball game? What you wore today except for the panties comes back into my wardrobe. You make too pretty of a girl to dress down. If you did that you might be discovered as Tim more easily.”
We’re back down into their living room talking. Mom says, “I’m more than a little shocked at all you’ve agreed to. You impress me to be more mature and considerate than I even thought… I giggled when I heard you considered asking your cousin Cathy about getting some of her old clothes.”
“Your brothers won’t be too surprised about you wearing girl’s clothes. Rick and the others know but have been threatened about giving you a hard time.”
I said, “They know! Is that why they laugh sometimes, but won’t ever say why?”
Mom says, “If they give you a light razzing, then they and you can finally talk about it. They won’t be saying anything to others that is for you to do. Brien is already on your side. You and he have always been close.”
Mom and I are saying goodbye and leaving when Melanie gives me a bag. I’m sure it’s some clothes but I feel some other things. I respond to her saying, “I’m not so sure I should thank you for this or not. You got me into this and I’m more than a little afraid.”
She smiles, “You got yourself into this as a muddy boy. You chose to stop at our house and ask for help.”
The ride home isn’t very long by car. Long enough that Mom reflects, “Are you terribly sorry you got yourself caked with mud now?”
“I didn’t know how much it would cause me to change. Dad had my brothers and I was closer to you. I was glad when Melanie and her mom said that I took after you in looks.”
I could see the glow of her pride from the dashboard lights.
Once in the house, Mom called out, “We’re home!”… There’s a short pause, “I want everyone in the living room!” Dad was already coming to see us. Rick was home from college tonight. Brien came bouncing down the stairs and hugged me as he does while asking, “How was your night?” He sniffed in and held it.
I was sure he smelled a fragrance of some sort from when I was in Melanie’s room or maybe her clothes.
Mom had us all sit down before she was going to tell us what she had to say. “Your Dad and I wanted all of you on the same page. It’s just for us right now, but I expect others will come to know. Tim sees himself as a girl, Danica, as well as himself.”
I speak up intending to correct her. “I just like wearing girls’ clothes sometimes. I don’t…”
Mom says, “You can tell them what you want. But you become too much of a girl to say less. He dressed up as a girl tonight, trying to do someone a favor. It was a favor I thought was right but wouldn’t be accepted. That favor was to go to the prom with someone with him going as Danica.”
“The upper classman’s mother hoped he’d get to the prom with a girl, but the boy is gay. She is very sick and does not do well. Tim isn’t gay but he did offer to go to the prom with him. He dresses quite convincingly as a girl and will appear to be an attractive high school girl. Well, Harrison… oops. I didn’t intend to say a name, but he didn’t say, “No. They’re going out a week from Saturday to see if they get along.”
“You might be seeing Danica sometimes around the house. She needs experience just dressing and living as a girl.” Mom came over to me and put her hands on my shoulders. Then she asked, “Does anyone have a question for Tim?”
My father spoke up, “We’ll be calling your older brother. He and Amanda knew this was coming and Amy’s acceptance has actually made it easier for your brother to accept. I expect they’ll be here this weekend to meet Danica.”
Rick is blatant about it, “Hey Tim, I thought you were a weakling sissy. But you have more courage than I do. If it’s Harrison Deters, you’re going with. I could see a girl seeing him as a stud. I just thought you liked dressing in girls’ clothes. I didn’t know you’re a homo.”
“I’m not gay!”
Mom and Dad both spoke up, telling Rick to be quiet and sit down.
He said, “I didn’t mean anything negative, he knows me. I just said it as I see it. I’ll be okay with it.”
Brien says, “We’ve kind of talk around this Tim. You know I’m your best friend as well as your brother. I don’t fully understand it and I’m not quite sure what to say. Dad and Mom told us before, but I searched your stuff and found no indication it was true.” He paused like he wasn’t sure if he wanted to say something. “If Melanie’s becoming a better friend had anything to do with it. I’m not sure if I should thank her for being a better sister than I’ve been a brother. I just hope it’s not because she leads you that way.”
I stood up to hug Brien and when we hugged I broke down and cried. Mom and Dad and then even Rick came and hugged us.
To be continued…
Danica Sightings
Stopped for help; bad boy makes it worse…
Time has passed; Tim tried to change…
Once again he has desires to wear girls’ clothing…
=^_^=
I was moved by their caring, but then Rick said, “But I can’t accept that you’re dating already, and please don’t tell me you’re going to the Prom with him?
I could tell my parents were going to say something to him, but I wanted to speak for myself. “Rick, it has taken me a long time to get the courage to tell you. And I’m surprised things might be moving a little fast, but I’m not going to stop it because of you.”
Rick and Brien both wanted to know if I was going to school tomorrow as Danica. They were relieved to hear I wasn’t.
Harris did tell some of his friends that he hoped he had a date for the prom. I was worried that my brothers thought I and him announced it. After lunch, Brien saw me in the hallway and asked if I told anyone. He was embarrassed and didn’t know what to say when his friend Jacob asked, “What was he saying?” Neither of us answered.
Brien and I then realized problems like this were going to come up. Later when I saw Melanie and her friend Angie; they too were having trouble between them about what wasn’t being said. Angie asked me, “Do you know what it is that Mel isn’t willing to tell me about?”
She sensed I knew and then insisted: “The next to last period the three of us are going to meet in one of the conference rooms in the library.” When Melanie started to say, “Not then or there,” Angie stopped her, “Yes then, or I’ll start a rumor.” She walked to her next class not waiting for our answers.
Melanie and I were on our way to the same class. We agreed we better do as her friend suggested. Melanie suggested that Angie’s guess would likely be accurate. And I needed to decide if I would trust Angie.
We met with Angie, but it was Melanie that put Angie’s friendship on the line. “We need you to trust me! When we’re ready to tell anyone you’ll be one of the first.”
Angie said, “Well I was just speculating because Tim isn’t the loudmouth guy he was since you two became friends.”
I said, “If I wanted to speculate things about you; I’m sure I’d think of something you wouldn’t like. That’s how it is with you about me right now.” Enough was said and we reaffirmed our friendships.
=^_^=
Dad told my brother, “Rick quit teasing Tim. If it works out after their date that Harrison wants to take him as Danica to the prom; things will need to be decided then.”
Rick thinks he’s being nice as he asks, “Brien do you want to room with me instead of Danica?”
Brien looks at me and I wonder if he now feels uncomfortable with me. But he says, “Why he’s the same brother. I’ve known before this. If he wants, he can dress as a girl in our room.”
Rick was surprised and didn’t know what to say.
The next two days at school were kind of normal. Word was out that Harrison might be going to the Prom; there was uncomfortable speculation after that. Melanie told me that Harrison was pretty sure he liked me and wanted me as his date. Thinking of being his date gave me mixed feelings. Whenever I had imagined myself as Danica going on a date. I liked the idea that a boy would find me attractive. But I wanted to be seen as a girl and I that’s not how Harrison is seeing me.
That day after school I went to Melanie’s house and her best friend Hanna was there. She asked me, and it shouldn’t have been a big surprise. Hanna asked, “So Danica, what do you think of dating Harrison, isn’t he a stud?” She saw my surprise and instantly covered herself. “I knew it had to be you. I force Melanie to spill the beans. I’m still her best friend and as such things are safe with me.”
Hanna said, “I knew ever since fifth grade when I saw you as a girl over here. Something happened when you suddenly became good friends after that. You’re still that goofy boy much of the time, but you’ve also become different.”
We were doing some reading together and then Hanna turned to Melanie, then me, and back to Melanie. Something changed in Melanie’s voice. She kind of whispered to me, but it was loud enough that Hanna could also hear that didn’t quite make sense. “Hanna is wondering if Danica would let Hanna see her”
I looked over to her closet and saw an outfit I liked hanging at the front of the closet. I’m sure I was blushing. Hanna asks, “Don’t you think that would be a pretty outfit to model?”
Melanie says, “If you’re willing to try it on; my Mom says you need to use the bathroom to change.”
I was in the bathroom changing when her mother knocked at the bedroom door bringing us hot chocolate. It was a real cold day for spring. “Danica! I’ll bring you a cup of tea just in case.”
I had changed my hairstyle and put on some makeup. Hanna was surprised to see me. “I’ve seen pictures of you before, but I never knew they were of you. I think you’re very cute… I bet however, Harrison sees you and likes what he sees. Melanie says, "You’re not like him, but that you’re doing him a favor.”
She says, “Whether you’re gay or not it’s apparent that you enjoy being a girl.”
“I don’t know how that can be. I’m not very comfortable right now in front of you,” I said.
Melanie says, “I think it’s the effort to look nice as another one of us.” Her mother brings in the cup of tea.
Mrs. Sinclair says, “Very tasteful Danica. Did you go light on the makeup so they could fuss over you and do more?” I hadn’t purposely done that. It did help me to become more comfortable with Hanna when they did. They shaped my nails and use a clear pink tint that made my fingers look good.
I spoke to Melanie saying, “I told Mrs. Deters I would come over and visit her Sunday. I wonder if she expects me to dress like a girl?”
Melanie says, “I think that is a given. If you want you can go over there tomorrow with me. I’ll be giving her some needed attention. You and Harrison can check out some of his baseball and other sports paraphernalia. That’s if he gets there while we are.”
Mrs. Sinclair poke her head back into the room. “Is everyone ready to get going?”
I was the only one surprised a little surprised. We were going to buy myself some clothes and makeup. I had hoped with the attention I got that was all forgotten.
We stopped at a store the next town over. I already knew two students from our school who work there. “Can we please go somewhere else that I won’t be recognized?”
Mrs. Sinclair says, “The prom is just forty days away. You need to get used to not only dressing as a woman but to act like one as well. Melanie says the students from your school who work here can be a big help.”
We hadn’t taken more than six steps in and Tiffany greets us. “Can I help you?”
I tell her, “I need clothes for everyday wear.”
She says, “That is very smart of you. Please know I will be there for you at school if need be.”
I said, “Does everyone know about me?”
“You’ve become Harrison’s new friend when he’s finally talking about going to the Prom. I think only a few people know so far. I also knew you were a good friend of his cousin Melanie here.”
Tiffany pulls me away from others, “I’m sorry, I should have handled this better. I am serious that most people are in the dark about this. But even if and when it becomes known. Everyone thinks so highly of Harrison and his mother battling cancer. Most will be tickled pink that you’re doing it. You can say whatever you want that you’re not seriously liking him. People are already hoping it will be someone nice like you that they can admire… Sorry we’ll need to talk another time if you wish. It looks like you have some shopping to do.”
I liked the suggestions Tiffany made regarding my selections. She encouraged me to consider a nice blue full skirt that hits me just below the knees and a bright spring blouse of orange and yellow, flowers, birds, and bees. The blouse we chose would snuggly fit me and with a light coat, it could be excellent for the baseball game.
Melanie said, “It might be more girly than Harrison would like, but it is darling and you look very well in it.” Melanie helped me to pick another nice outfit for tomorrow, when she said we were going to the Deters. “Mrs. Deters will like how you look in this one. You could consider the dressy designer jeans or an attractive skirt for Sunday.”
It took us over a half hour just to choose the last outfit, which I thought was ridiculous. Melanie and her mother were both happy that I had relaxed and enjoyed trying on so many outfits. Tiffany was very happy about the sale. She complimented the clothes that I bought at other stores. She said, “I can tell Melanie has coached you on shopping as well as fashion.”
We were walking out to leave when Tiffany came running up to us. “Danica, I seriously think you should consider attending the rest of the school year as a girl, a T-girl.”
My Mom had stopped at the Sinclairs to give me a ride home. I thought the visit at the Sinclairs’ was short with little said. Thus, I was surprised that she said, “We should consider Tiffany’s idea, about Danica going to school.”
“Mom, I’m not transgender.”
Mom says, “I accept you saying you’re not gay. But I am not sure transgender is not a better description of you than being a crossdresser. It will, however, be up to you to decide something like that. I just want you to know, I am open to that.”
Story to continue…
Spinning World of Changes
That day at school was good, but I was distracted by the thought of going with Melanie to the Deter’s home as she took care of her Aunt. I had dropped off an outfit for me as Danica at Melanie’s before we went to school. It was an orange skirt that looked fairly plain as did the blue and orange blouse that coordinated with it.
Silly me as a boy I wondered what boy would pick an orange skirt and that blouse. Melanie finally understood it was bothering me, so when we ate together at lunch. “It might seem silly for a boy to wear what you chose, but it’s Danica who’s going to be wearing it. I think it looks cute on Danica.”
After school when we got to the Deters, Harrison’s Mom complimented on how cute the outfit was, asking, “Did your mother or Melanie pick that out?” When I told her it was me; she said, “I see you already have the eye of a girl in picking out what you’re going to wear.” I was not fully comfortable with that thought.
Come five o’clock I was helping in the preparation of cooking supper when Harrison got home. Once he was changed his mother sent me to look at his sports collections. His Dad had always doted on him taking him to various games and meets and ended up buying him sports paraphernalia of stars and teams. Harrison at 17 already had an extensive collection that was interesting to browse through.
Harrison said, “I guess my Dad knew he wouldn’t always be here and wanted these things to remind me of his love. I think, he also did it so guys would like and accept me despite my being gay and hopefully not beat on me.”
We talked and I asked if he has ever gotten beaten up because of that. I hadn’t known those things happened. Harrison told me, “It first happened when I was eleven. I won a stuffed kitten at a ball toss game and I called it Evie. They teased me that was a girlie name and that a boy would have chosen a puppy. I acknowledged I liked soft things. Two boys beat me up and after that, some people began to call me names more often.
He said, “But being gay wasn’t a bad thing to me. That was when my Dad began explaining things to me. Mom explained I had a very caring heart for a boy and the way I liked people and things were different. I still get in fights at times. Sometimes they say isn’t always because I’m gay but often it is. It is more about them being in denial.”
He began to cry a little and leaned over to hug him. I fell in his lap and he laughed.
“Why are you laughing,” I asked?
He asked, “Are you gay?” And I became upset because I had told him before I’m not gay. He said, “But if someone saw you in my lap they would say you are.” Harrison hugged me, and I thought of pulling away but I didn’t. Instead, I stayed there as he showed me other pictures and things in his collection.
I even realized that he had become aroused. It felt strange but I remained quiet and where I was; we looked at his collection until we were called to supper. When we stood up to go eat he thanked me and kissed me.
When we sat down to eat he told his mother and Melanie, “I guess I found another girl I like?” They paused not quite understanding until I blushed.
It was seven-thirty and we went back to Melanie’s house that she commented. “Well is it time for us to begin looking for your prom dress? Or do we need to wait until after your date?” I still had my time with Mrs. Deters and seven more days before our date to go to the baseball game.
I liked my time with Mrs. Deters, but she treated me more like a regular girl instead of talking to me about Harrison’s stuff. She asked me, “Have you ever massaged your mother’s shoulders or back?”
When I said yes. She hesitated until I asked if she would like one and she cried yes. I began massaging her shoulders, I realized her shoulders and back were a mess of tight knots and sores. I was using as light touches as possible, often using the palm of my hand to massage a wider surface. I knew there was some hurt, but more soothing. She talked about how some friends had stopped visiting as she got sicker. She said I was good for her as well as Harrison.
She and I had cooked the supper that Mrs. Sinclair had sent with me. Here I was becoming a better cook as Danica. It felt good and I liked the time being treated as another woman. My mother, like Mrs. Deters, enjoys having Danica around. I am liking it more and more.
Harrison was home for dinner but it was her who had most of my attention. Harrison hugged me and kiss when I left, but I justified that it was for being nice to his mother.
Another day when my mother picked me up with Melanie from their place. Melanie and my mother told me that Teresa, a senior girl from our school was wanting to go shopping with us.
Teresa was waiting for us at my house by the time we got back. When she saw that I had been doing things and was not quite fresh. She spoke up, “You need to shower and get cleaned up before you go trying on any prom gowns.”
I hadn’t planned on trying on gowns, but Teresa’s point was correct. My taking barely an hour was a rush to her and Melanie, but enough for them to be accepting of Danica. Mom checked and made sure that I had glued on my breastforms and fresh panties before we left the house.
We had seen three gowns or dresses we like but I had not tried on one. That was when Teresa spoke again and my mother agreed, “You need to try on one and then more so we can see how they look on you.” Teresa had me step up on a small platform and a saleswoman measure me. They determined I would be able to try on size four or six gowns depending on the style.
I wasn’t supposed to hear when Teresa whispered to Melanie, “He’s lucky he’s not a girl or I think Harrison’s dick would split her if she was a girl.” I was grossed out and Melanie knew by my facial expression that I heard the statement.
Melanie said, “That’s girl talk just in case you thought we’re ‘just sugar and spice, and all things nice’.”
The first gown I tried on was silver with several blue swirls that accented my curves as if I had them. It would not make the final round of selection, but it was pretty and nice to try on. I liked white with various colors adding to the look. It was after the second such gown; Mom said, “You’re neither going to be a bride nor are you neat enough for predominantly white.” Sadly I knew what Mom was talking about. It was a little while later that Melanie found a soft coral gown with a chiffon overlay. I loved it and it became the first of four gowns I was to set aside. It was beautiful and I loved the feel of wearing it.
We went up to three o’clock looking and my trying prom dresses and Teresa returned the gowns not selected. There it was a pink and lavender gown. I really liked it and I had Melanie send a picture of me in it to Mrs. Deters. Ma Deters text, “You look exquisite like the gown was made for me”. That was actually very close to what Teresa had said when she found it. It cost me fifty dollars to have it held for me. That ended our search for tonight. We were chatting away as Teresa and Melanie sent some pictures to other friends as we rode back home.
It was ten-thirty that night; I was sitting on Mom’s bed with her talking. “Mom, I think I’m just fooling myself if I don’t accept I’m also a girl.” Mom opened her arms to hug me, knowing it was a truth that wasn’t coming easy for me to admit.
The next day at school people was looking at me like there was something different, even more so as the school day went on. Finally, Melanie’s old friend Susan Reid said, “Now that it’s out, why don’t you just come to school as a girl Timothy?”
Some of the photos sent out the night before had made the rounds and had numerous hits. Melanie and Harrison both thought I was acting especially cool. When really I was clueless that others were coming to know about me and I was the talk of the school.
It was Teresa and some of her friends who pulled me aside to talk as the last class of the day was to begin. Teri said, “You probably have seen Beck, Halle, Meg (Brother Brien’s girlfriend), and Steph. We want to talk to you about the prom, but don’t worry it’s all good.” Once others get to classes, they have me follow them into the girl’s room.
“Now that it’s out that you’re going to the prom with Harrison as Danica. We encourage you to come to school as Danica now so it’s not a surprise or taking away from the prom.” Megan speaks, “We even want to take you shopping after school and help get you some school clothes. This way you’ll have more practice as Danica in doing your hair and makeup. …You and I can ride with Teresa to your house. You can change into Danica and then we can go shopping.”
I am looking around and have the feeling this isn’t even a discussion. I say, “I’d need my Mom’s approval.”
“We’d have an hour shopping even before she might first be home. Brien is pretty sure your parents will be okay with it. He doesn’t see it as drastic as you going with Harrison.”
I say, “But, that’s as a favor to Harrison and his Mom. What you’re talking about is for me living as a girl.” I become silent as there are two different pictures of me as Danica being shown on their phones. Meg gives a warm hug holding my arm, “You’re becoming more and more Danica. It’s you that said you’re not gay but a T-girl.” Megan says, “Your brother is the like rest of us, seniors. We don’t want the prom or our senior year hijack by a media circus. …We care about Harrison and no one wants to stop you from being there for him. …I would have thought you’d like the help of us girls encouraging you to be a girl. We even got a nice amount donated to help get you some good clothes for your school wardrobe.”
Megan knew I have a crush on Halle and her. I have their cheer pictures and more on my locker door, and around in my room. My portion of my room is more in girl mode and she knows it. Halle whispers, “If you want, your friend Melanie can come with you. Though I think it’s Sue who has a crush on you.”
My surprised look told them that was news to me. Sue and I are just friends, but my dream as Danica is that someone like Melanie or Sue would be who I fell in love with.
I wanted to get to class, but now it is way too late. Teresa left the girl’s room first to get her stuff to meet me at my locker. Megan came with me to my locker. I love her outfit and look, and I’m excited to be seen with her. The school bell rings to end school. Megan and I meet up with Teresa and Melanie going to the car.
All Melanie says as she smiles at me, “Isn’t this exciting?” I’m sandwiched in the back between Melanie and Meg as Halle is sitting up front with Teri.
When I got home. My brother Brien was already there and he pulled me away from the girls. “Mom says, ‘It is okay to change and go with the girls. If in fact, you are wanting to be Danica until the end of the school year. But you need to know; it is not permanent. Mom and Dad and the counselor will continue to watch you.”
I was excited and started to walk away to my room. Brien blocked me, saying, “Do you understand?” I had to explain what he said. And then he told me. “Mom says, you’re to get the basics on, before Meg, Mel, or anyone can come into the room help you as Danica.”
I used the breastforms I got for the prom gown. Without help attaching them, they were less than their best. I had gone to my room and knew I needed a shower before I went shopping. It was short and not the best but I felt like Danica.
Meg had been in my room and put clothes out on my bed. I smiled, liking what she had chosen for me. She even pulled out a special pair of panties and a nude pair of pantyhose. The skirt she had out was one that I liked. While it was shorter it was not short like hers.
I was soon wearing the panties and pantyhose and the lace bra with my forms. I told Melanie that she and Megan could help me. Halle came in with them asking me to relax.
It was funny because Halle was distracted by how girly my room had become. She said, “Thanks, I like the picture you have of me hanging up.” When she saw a picture of me stuck to my mirror with my makeup on trying to look like her. She said, “Cute, but I liked better the way you looked last night. You do better with finding your own look.”
That is how Meg helped do my makeup. I was surprised by how flawless and light my makeup was. She said, “Watch, I think this will be another good look for you. I want to thin out and work on your eyebrows, but not now. Let’s get going.”
Meg kissed Brien, the others wooed and we were gone. We were soon at the next small city over on a block of chick stores. Megan said, “Halle doesn’t regularly shop here but us girls without her means do when our ‘rents aren’t buying as much.” She said the spring stuff had been picked over but we could find some good things at bargain prices. The better clothes were for summer.
First up they pushed me toward designer jeans, but Halle and Teresa spoke up. “She looks better in skirts for now… She has the legs for it… When she’s more relaxed as a girl maybe jeans then.”
There were a dress and a skirt outfit that was snug and clingy that Meg, Halle, and Melanie liked as well as me. Most were regular skirts and dresses with light sweaters or tops. I had just tried an outfit and we liked it. Halle however asked, “Can we try it with just this sweater?” We all agreed but I guess I didn’t understand what she meant. I head back to the changing room and once in I try to close the door. Halle’s in the way and pushes me a half step forward.
Halle says, “I need you to take off the top and then your bra.”
“But it won’t look right my forms won’t stay on,” I said as I took off the top. Halle helps taking off the bra. She takes the forms and asks me to sit still on the little bench. She marks my right chest saying it looks good. He takes my left breast form and puts it up to my chest and outlines the form slightly different than the marks showed where they were press by the bra. She pulls out a jar from her purse and spreads the mixture over my breast area. Then painstakingly presses the form in place. “Hold your boob please.” With that, she spreads the adhesive on my right breast area. She takes a deep breath, “Take a breath and then hold still until I say so. They are nice forms, do you like playing with yourself? Don’t answer just hold still.” With that, she checks four marks on my chest matching them with those on the breast form. She checks double checks acts like she’s taking another breath. But she has started to press from the side and top, moves slightly, and checks the top to the inside mark guiding the edge of the form as she presses it in place and begins holding it in place.
“Meg, can you please squeeze in here.” Once she’s in, she takes the lightweight sweater and prepares to put it on over my head. “Now Danica gently let go and pull your hands away and to your sides.”
Megan says, “I don’t know how you do that Halle.” Megan gently rubs her fingers along the edge. There’s one spot that could be better but everything is great.” Halle has me let go of the other boob and is checking.
I am lifting my hands and I’m to put them through the arms of the sweater. It is coming down over my head and my arms feel like they are going through the softest of cotton. It is no sweater like I felt going over my body. I know it is sliding over my boobs and I wished they could feel the sensation that I’m feeling elsewhere. My arms are down and I and Megan smooth it out and make sure there are no wrinkles or flaws.
Halle moves away from the mirror in there. “Hey Danica, do you like this look? I think you look awesome.”
My mouth mouths, ‘O M’ and I see two breasts pushing out my sweater. I love a girl with this look, but like Tim, I made sure never to stare as much as I want to. Halle holds a vest for me to put my arms through. It just hangs there framing my breasts and down my side.
Halle opens the door and softly, yet loud enough for others to hear, “We’re coming out.” Megan and Halle step out first and move to stand with the others. Even a saleswoman and two other teen girls are watching.
Everyone is silent as different faces of awe and amazement come to their faces. Finally, Melanie steps forward holding out her arms for a hug. “Oh my Danica, you are awesome like this.” I am sure the other two teen girls are wondering why all the attention. “Look, Ariel, she’s not wearing a bra. I’d die to do that.”
I guess it is special. I’m in awe that I’m able to do it, but I feel like I’m too out there. I want to turn around and go back to the changing room. Halle says, “Oh no, you’re going home and showing your Mom how much of a girl you are.” She hands Steph the price tags, “We can pay for everything now.”
I can’t believe it as I place my purse strap over my head and it falls between my boobs. I see in a mirror how I look like most other girls. I’m definitely younger than the seniors and my breasts appear smaller like soft pillows, my nipples show as pretty dots. I hear some phones click pictures other were too quiet but I can tell Mel’s sending some.
She looks at me, “I sent two one to your mom and Jodi. I hope you don’t mind.”
I ask, “And who else?”
Meg volunteers, “Mrs. Deters, Harrison, and a few friends.” Several phones go off and people are either talking or texting.
Melanie has my phone, “Your mother wants to talk.” She hands me my phone. I was afraid I lost my mother’s call, but she’s still there. “So how are you? I couldn’t fully tell from your expression.”
“I know, I didn’t know what to think. I didn’t know they would do it. …Halle attached them to me in the changing room. …I couldn’t believe it either. I even held one in place as it set. …I’m glad you don’t mind. I know you said, ‘I’m beautiful.’ Thank you. The panty I have on doesn’t show it’s so thin. It feels great. …It and the hose hold me in. I appear to be all girl. …Good, we should be home right after everything’s paid for.”
Susan Reed called and I answer. I’m remembering someone said she had a crush on me. “Hi Susan, O thanks that’s sweet of you. Hope to see you at school. What would you think if I come as Danica? …Really, I’d like to be friends.” I wanted to kiss her over the phone but resisted.
Being a girl having girlfriends would be ideal for me. Halle hugs me. She’s holding me to whisper, “I hope you didn’t feel me too forward. But if I were you, I thought this would top tonight’s experience. I really do appreciate you doing this for Harrison. And I’d love to talk with you sometime, about how this all feels for you. Maybe you could come over for a pajama party?”
I blushed as Halle asked, “Would you like that?”
We arrived home at my house and mother greeted everyone at the door, saying, “Pizza’s been ordered.” She had diet drinks and flavored water to drink. Mom hands me a new outfit she wants me to change into. Instead of letting me go to my room they gather around me and turn their backs. But as soon as I have my clothes off, they walk away and leave me changing there in the open. Mom is first upset but realizes I’m being seen as another girl. And she doesn’t see my boy bits.
There’s a knock at the door and it opens showing Harrison’s here. We meet with him hugging me and a little kiss. “Can we talk, please? I don’t have much time as Mom’s home alone,” Harrison’s talking as we’re walking to get some space. He sits down in a lone chair and pulls me in his lap.
“I saw two of your pictures. You look very nice, but I needed to come and make sure you are alright?” Harrison has a concerned look on his face. “This might be a good idea, but not if you’re being pressured to do it against your desire. I had to come and nip this as soon as possible if need be.”
I hug him as he’s being a dear. I’ve been asking some of the same since the afternoon of shopping began. I give him a kiss and smile, saying, “Thanks. I wasn’t sure at first. It kind of makes sense, but I’m not… No wait, I wasn’t comfortable, but it kind of feels right. I know me and my Momma needs to talk about it.”
I ask, “Are you comfortable with me being out as transgender. I don’t want you if you feel uncomfortable with me out as a girl going to the Prom.”
Harrison waves to prom tickets, “You’re my date, Dani.” 'Dani?' I know he’s aroused, but glad he’s not pressing on me. It is just a huge hug and passionate kiss.
He told me his Mom got sick earlier, but says, “She’s actually getting better. You’ve been good medicine for my mom. She hopes you’re still coming Sunday afternoons to sit with her.”
We talk to my mother and she’s very happy that Harrison was so thoughtful to come over. Harris soon left first, and by a little after nine everyone but Melanie and Megan was gone.
My Dad is out with Mom to talk with me. Megan is in Brien’s arms but is focused on me as is Melanie. My Dad says, “You seem to already be comfortable with this. That you might come to be comfortable isn’t surprising.”
Momma says, “We’re willing to talk more alone and we will be. But if you’re wanting to be starting tomorrow, I, we need to know?”
I’m sitting with Melanie directly across from my momma and dad. “Mom, I can’t believe I’m Danica. I’m actually afraid of trying to go back to being Tim before the Prom. I want to try this. I know we need to talk and that I need to see my counselor.”
I turn and whisper to Melanie, “Did you know about Susan Reed?” She shushes me, “Not now.” I understand, but it also means it’s probably true.
My mother walks me to my room and Melanie and Megan are encouraged to come. Mother says, “You looked very nice when you came home. But you and your girlfriends need to know you’re not going around braless. You’re much too young for that. I’m suspecting Halle was in your bedroom before you left and saw your poster of her.”
“Girls,” my Mom turns to Melanie and Megan, “I will be bringing Danica to school a little late in the morning. I’m hoping the next few school days especially she’ll have girlfriends supporting her.”
Melanie said, “Halle and Megan were here to explain the concern of the senior girls. And I agreed a surprise at Prom time could be distracting. Danica is our chief concern. I’m surprised how all that she did worked this well. Danica needs to sleep on it and see how she feels in the morning. But you know what I suspect we’ll be doing.”
Melanie and Megan give me hugs, as well as my Mom as they say thanks and leave.
“Momma, I’ll help you clean up.”
Mom smiles, “Your Dad and Brien are doing that. You and I will go through your clothes. Putting some things in the wash, having you model and help you put some other things away properly. It will probably be helpful not having you switch back and forth. If it will be Danica taking better care of things in her room.”
I tried a dress last and Momma held it after she helped me out of it. “You young lady go take a relaxing shower and doing your hair and skin. I’ll be back shortly to help when you’re done.”
Taking the shower, I was surprised how nicely my breast forms held. Patting myself dry and having my hair wrapped up was kind of fun tonight. I could see how it could get old, but that won’t happen anytime soon.
Momma and I talk. The decision of how long this lasts will be decided after the prom. We initially talk that all this is temporary. By the time I was ready for bed and ending our talk. We both wondered aloud about me continuing as Danica. That part of the conversation is only for Momma and me for now…
Story to be continued…
A Different Mess at Sixteen
And romantic emotions with Harrison and Prom...
The reality is that I find Susan’s interest attractive…
=^_^=
I went to sleep with a head full of thoughts and emotions and I woke up with more of the same. I did feel rested. I had my mother’s help with combing out my hair as I got dressed for my first day as Danica in going to school. My clothes for this morning were nice but nothing exciting. A video chat with Melanie allowed me to know I looked pretty as Danica, which gave me some confidence as I face my day.
When I got to breakfast, I was surprised Brien didn’t give me any grief. Dad and Megan had both given him orders to behave. He had now shared the bedroom with my brother, Rick. He said it was all his idea to be nice to me. He even complimented how I looked. He said he planned to enjoy having a sister for now.
Momma told me to put a rush on breakfast as we were seeing Dr. Ramona Newsom at the women’s clinic. She has already been my counselor. I saw her twice when things first began again. She had even seen me as Danica.
I was more comfortable in the waiting room presenting myself as Danica. Though two other girls came in shortly before I was taken to be seen by the doctor. Melanie had advised me to relax and expect the others to see a girl as they expected. “Well Danica, I can see things have changed since we last talked.”
“The breastforms and wanting to go to school as Danica shows you’re ready and eager to begin school as yourself. Please explain the change of seeing yourself as transgender? I thought you were just a boy going to do a favor for a sick woman and her son?”
I said, “I was pretty sure you already knew it wasn’t going to be as simple as I expressed it. I’m still Tim as well as Danica and I’m not gay. But Harrison is inviting me as his prom date. What has changed is the senior girls don’t want me to be a surprise at prom time and to spoil it for them. They offered to help me shop for some girl school clothes, so I could attend as Danica. Mom and I are going to the school after this. Hopefully with a note from you that it is okay that I’m doing this.”
Dr. Ramona says, “If I sign a note for today. It will say you are a transgendered girl. That you’re coming out now and you plan to be a date to the prom. It is my understanding this is being done now as a favor to senior girls as well as the person you’re going with to the prom. Is that something you can acknowledge and own up to?”
She said, “I also agree with whoever suggested you should be part of the school’s LGBT support group.” I tried saying I would consider the possibility but didn’t want to formally say it.
My mother agreed with Dr. Newsom that the support group would be a good idea. With tears, I said, “I never intended to be a girl. Somehow I’m just never been able to stop.”
Dr. Ramona gave me a disc of birth control pills instead of a testosterone blocker. “You don’t want to be on these more than two months or they or they can thwart your body from making its testosterone. We will take a maximum of six weeks to decide what you want to do.”
After having explained everything, the Doctor started to see her regular patients, while her assistant Marge was going over the same things. I guess it was all to make sure we knew and agreed with all we’re doing. Nurse Marge gave me her phone number and email to connect with her over the littlest of stuff.
I did so once during school and again when I got home.
We went to school with my letter from Dr. Ramona. The Principal wanted me to go home and wait until Monday to start. Momma was insistent that I was starting today. She even sent me to my fourth-period history class as she kept talking to the principal and my advisor Mrs. Brandt.
I gave the teacher my pass from the secretary and officially my schooling as Danica had begun. Mr. Spalti announced my name and he told Melanie and Susan to quit hooting.
I did get a note to visit with Mrs. Brandt during my study time. She requested I join a bike-riding class for the remainder of the year to count as my gym requirement. There were two girls’ rooms I was to limit myself to using.
Megan and Becky Johnson talked to me at lunch and we agreed I needed to go get my ears pierced. Megan was becoming more like my big sister and special friend.
I wanted to talk with Harrison before getting my ears pierced. He and the baseball team had two games today. I felt like another girl with Megan as we were watching our boyfriends warming up for the first game. I started to walk away to the car before Meg kissed Brien good luck. I looked up to Harrison and he smiled. “Can you believe it; I’ve never had a good luck kiss.” I tried to kiss him on the cheek, but he turned and we kissed lips to lips. He held me around the waist and I began to feel like I was a real girlfriend.
He said, “Brien does it like this?” He placed his hand to lift my chin and we kissed. It felt good. I know Megan and others watched us. Meg’s smile was all that counted. We left the park and were off to ‘Bling and Bangles’. I could see her look over at my legs or skirt as she drove.
I asked, “Is there something wrong, or is it just me in a skirt?”
Megan said, “Just the opposite. I can’t get over how nice your legs are. And you seem comfortable wearing skirts. I have no trouble seeing why. I’m not sure, but I think Harrison even thinks you’re cute.”
Megan looks at me, “You have something else on your mind what is it?”
I was thinking of Susan Reed but wasn’t sure if I should say anything. Megan looks at me again, “So out with the question? It is about you as Danica with her, isn’t it?”
“Yes, but it’s silly. Halle said, something about Susan liking me as a girl. Did you know that?”
She said, “I kind of guess it is true.” Melanie and I talked about it. Melanie said, she’s more comfortable with you as Danica. Do you like her as well?”
We arrive at the mall with all the stores, and we’re walking inside when Rose, she’s one of the senior girls recognizes me. She’s coming the other way with friends. She stops and asks Megan, “Where are you taking her now?”
“We’re going to Bling and Bangles as if you need to know.” Rose perks up after looking at my ears.
“You’re going to have your ears pierced?”
“I’m getting some earrings, what do you think! I’m not going to be wearing them in my purse.”
Rose giggles, “Well you’re the only boy I know who shops with a purse, so I wouldn’t be completely surprised if you did. Do you mind if we come and watch? You can lose your attitude as we’ll follow along anyway.”
Tiff’s with her, saying, “You look too good as a girl to just be doing this as a favor for Harrison. Are you coming to school the rest of the year as a girl? I’d like to get Chuck to do it even for a day.”
It was kind of fun choosing which earrings and get the help of other girls. It would have been easier if we did it alone. But I don’t think they would have been as pretty. Rose and Tiff each bought and gave me a pair as their idea of a peace offering.
Megan decided to look for a skirt she saw the other day. We found it, or at least one she liked as much. I too thought it was pretty. A thought came to me and I said, “Have you ever thought of talking Brien into dressing as a girl?” I giggled uncontrollably when she blushed. “You did! Have you done it yet?”
Megan said, “You can’t say anything. We’re going to try to do it at one of the senior graduation parties. I’m hoping he’ll go on a date with me dressed up. What do you think?”
Once back in the car, we drove back to the ball field to watch the ball games. The first was about over. Our team won three to two. Brien told Megan, “That was supposed to be our easy game. Harrison is supposed to pitch against their best pitcher. I’m afraid their good hitters will be trouble for him.”
I saw Harrison warming up and went over to the fence to watch him. Bart the catcher said, “Don’t distract him, or Coach will get upset.”
“I just wanted to ask if he liked my earrings. No, I wanted to say two things.”
Harrison said the earrings are very nice to me. “I like you got two piercings. …Now, what’s the second thing?”
“I wanted to say I’ll give you a big kiss if you win the game.”
Harrison threw the pitch even harder, and then said, “I wanted something else.”
“Don’t get selfish!”
“Could you come here just for a moment, please?” Harrison came over, saying, “I know I shouldn’t have spoken out like that. I’m sorry.”
I giggle, “Don’t try so hard pitching that you throw your arm out in three innings.” I kissed him and then turned and walked away. I went to where there were other girls and no boys were sitting. Steph and Halle separated and patted the seat they made open for me. Megan went up first and sat behind where I was to sit.
I thanked them as I felt safe being Danica with them. Both teams had scored one run and now in the third inning the other team was threatening to score with two runners on and Harrison was facing McGregor one of their best hitters. Bart and the Coach went out to talk to him. Harrison knew another pitcher was warming up to come in and pitch. I yelled, “He saved himself until now! Let him pitch! Let him pitch!” Others around us yelled with me.
I don’t know what Harrison said, but the Coach left him in. The Coach as he walked back off the field looked up to us and shook his head. The first pitch to McGregor was much faster and he swung late missing the ball. The next pitch if anything was a bit faster. I was both excited and nervous for Harrison as McGregor had just fouled a ball off. I was sure McGregor felt he would hit the next pitch.
Everything looked the same to me, except the pitch was slower. Stephanie jumped up as she saw something. Their big hitter struck out. Stephanie turned and hugged me. “Do you know what Harrison just did?” She was shouting at me, “He did it! He did it!”
I was excited and happy. I knew the hitter was out and Harrison now had a chance to getting out of the inning without a run-scoring. And he did as the next hitter hit a weak ground ball for the third out.
My Dad told me it is a good thing when someone did a good thing on defense and then was soon up to hit. Brien was up first and singled and was now on second base with one out and Harrison was up to hit. Megan was hugging my shoulders as I was cheering for Harrison.
Megan reminded me, “Madison has their best pitcher pitching. Don’t get your hopes too high.” It was the next pitch and Harrison hit the ball hard down the right-field line. Everyone stood up and became quiet to see if it would land foul or fair. Harrison was running hard. Brien was running but a lot slower to make sure it wasn’t caught. Then when the ball came down and hit fair inside the line. Everyone screamed and cheered. Brien scored a run and Harrison slid safely into third as the third baseman caught a throw and tried to tag him.
Harrison and one more player scored before the inning ended. Madison did score one more run, but our Mustangs won the game 5-2. I was with the other girls at the edge of the field as our players came off at the end of the game.
Harrison picked me up and held me as we swung around in a circle. He was letting me down when I felt my skirt riding up. I tried to hold it down but I wasn’t sure how successful I was. He gave me a big kiss as he was still holding me up off the ground. My startled face must have registered with him. He said he was sorry and finished letting me down.
I said, “Don’t be sorry, I want to be your girlfriend.” Harrison whispered, “Boyfriend.” I hugged him around the neck and he lifted me as he gave me a passionate kiss.
It was almost nine o’clock when Harrison and others came out changed into their regular clothes. Some other players asked if he could get something to eat with them. He couldn’t stay as long because of his mother. He was however going to have a good time. He and Brien both looked at me.
Brien came over to me saying, “I’m sure Mom will support you if you decide to go with us. Just text and ask.”
I said, “Are you going to tell her you’re staying out?” When he said yes, I asked, “Could you ask for the both of us. It shouldn’t be as late for me.”
Brien smiled as he said, “I can’t believe I’m asking this for my sister.” His girlfriend said, “And she makes a neat sister if I say so.”
We went for pizza, more to be with everyone. I was tickled for Harrison as he pitched a great game and he was given the game ball signed by his teammates. He’d talk to me as well as visiting with everyone. “It was nice to have you cheering for me. I thought that was you yelling for the coach to give me a chance to pitch to McGregor. …I think he was going too anyway, but it was nice having you cheer me on. …And I did as you said. I didn’t throw everything hard at first.” He kissed me and I could feel his hands under my blouse. He wasn’t wanting my boobs, just to hold me. Hopefully others, especially Brien were too busy and couldn’t see.
We left early and headed toward my house, but he parked, “I hope you don’t mind, but I’d like to kiss some.” He pushed his seat back and when I moved as close as I could with the middle column there. I leaned over to kiss him and he lifted me with his arms and brought me onto his lap.
I was worried, more I was impressed he wanted me so much. It was tight and I knew he was seeing me as a guy. While as a girl I also wanted to treat him special. It took a good effort before I was facing him and straddled over his lap. He was excited and I could feel it the way I was sitting.
When I was ready to move back to my seat, he said, “O how much, I’d like to make love to you.”
I said, “I know but I thank you for being nice.”
When we got to my house he walked me to the door and said, “I’m sorry, it probably grossed you out with what I said.”
“No, and maybe if biologically I was a girl I’d have tried to influenced you.”
He relaxed to kiss me goodnight. I said, “Come, your prom, I think we’ll need to find a way to be nicer.”
Harrison passionately kissed me more than I had ever kissed a girl. When the kiss was over both of us were very pleased. I quickly went through the door and leaned against it heavily to make sure it closed.
Mom waited before she called out, “Is that, you Danica? …It sounded like the games were exciting. But I’m interested in seeing your earrings.” Oh, yea, the earrings, and piercing were tonight. Though it didn’t feel like the same night. I checked how they looked in the hallway mirror. Mom had come out to the living room and turned on a light to see me.
I told her, “Megan told me, you said I should get two piercings for each ear. I got three pairs. Two girls who saw us there gave me another pair.” I was looking into my purse.
Mom said, “So did you end up getting four pairs or five?” I pulled out the other three pairs and showed them to answer her question.
Momma said, “I’m surprised that you kissed him as much as you did.”
“But you don’t sound surprised or angry Mom.” Momma, had me come to the couch and show me the earring and tell me what all happened? I snuggled up near her.
We had stayed up talking and it was well after eleven when Brien came home. He had to tell me about both games. It was near the end of his talking. He kept looking at me and finally asked, “Did Danica tell you how important she was for Harrison?”
“Mommy, I just told him something Brien told me once.”
“She wished him well, but I don’t think any of his friends did that quite like my sister. Plus when he was in little trouble she yelled for him and got some of the other girls and then more fans to yell as well. …You should have seen his next two pitches Mom even McGregor couldn’t hit them.”
I was going to my room to bed when I heard Brien said, “Mom if someone didn’t know whose Harrison’s prom date they will know tomorrow.”
I quickly showered and took my makeup off and moisturized my face. I knew someone was at my door as I slid my nightie down my body and jumped into bed. “If you’re wanting to say goodnight or something; I’m in bed and covered up now.”
My mother knocked at the door and came in. She came and sat down next to me. She cupped my hand and said, “You need to know I am here for you Danica for whenever you might want to talk as mother and daughter. Today had to be a big day for you. It was even bigger than we planned it would be.”
I was fortunate to have a mother I could talk to at such times. “You need to know the same is true if it would be as Timothy changing his mind.”
‘What do I say,’ I’m thinking? ‘Does she want me to change my mind?’ “Mom, I’m scared. I don’t know what you want me to say. Was that a hint that you want me to back out?”
Momma says, “No, I didn’t mean it that way. If this were fully a girl day and night one’s heart might be all aflutter. And you’d be alone with no one to share your feelings with. When you sat with me; I could tell you had got excited. If you and Harrison kissed as I suspect you did. I think he too had feelings for you. That is a lot to take even if you’re older and more experienced.”
I was now shaking and ready to cry. “Thanks, Mom. I wish I were a lot younger and you could sleep with me. I’m too tired to talk now, but I’d like to. I’m worried however what you might think of me.”
My Momma tells me, “Go to sleep knowing I love you very much. I want you to feel free to talk to me.”
I tried to stay awake and run through the day in my mind. However, it wasn’t long that being tired overtook me.
I was up getting ready for school when Melanie came on my computer screen. “Hi, Danica.’ I set my phone on a small shelf before me as I was just beginning my makeup. I had my spring sundress that I was going to wear. It was hanging on the towel rack behind me. Melanie asked, “Are you going to dare wear that with the strap around your neck as I suggested?”
“Yes with the top in halter fashion. Is that okay with you?”
Mel, “Yes you know it is. I just hope your mother doesn’t talk you into changing it.” I asked what she was wearing and it was one of my favorites. I asked about the shoes and she asked my suggestion. It wasn’t long and I was putting the finishing touches on my makeup. She said, “My how quickly you are becoming very good at doing your face. Did your Mom or someone already talk and suggest how to do it?”
When I said no. She was very impressed and complimented me. “After you eat come back and check with me.”
I asked, “So, did someone ask you to the prom as you thought?”
Melanie responded, “Oh, you irritate me…”
To be continued…
Thoughts, Feelings & Emotions
Melanie said, “Oh, you irritate me… You didn’t read my text yesterday. I wondered why you didn’t congratulate me. I thought you were being a tease. Brock Stephens did. Jake Thomas arrived at the same time. I asked him what he wanted, hoping he too was going to ask me to the prom.” She was talking about what she liked about each of them until I interrupted her.
I said, “Tell me already!”
“I could have killed Jacob when he said. If Brock asked you, you wouldn’t consider going with me.”
I yelled at him, “You blockhead, I shouldn’t since I think more of you than you do! Sorry Brock, but I’m going to go with Jacob.”
I told Brock, “I know a person, Sue Reed was wanting to go with someone who already has a prom date. Sue’s both attractive and pretty smart.”
I said, “You didn’t tell him that. I thought you said Sue was interested in me.”
Melanie giggle, “And you already have a prom date don’t you.”
Melanie says, “Change of subject, did your Mom say anything about going up to see your grandparents next week. My mom says we’re both going.”
“My mother said she was planning a getaway. She said that just before I went to school yesterday. Last night I was too tired to hear anything.” I picked up my phone along with a robe to go eat breakfast. There was her text message.
Once in the kitchen, I ask, “Mom are we going to my grandparents the weekend after this?”
Mom says, “Good morning Melanie; I should have suspected you might tell her first. It will be the five of us girls. Your mother thought you two needed to get away and just be friends. And Danica needs some ordinary girl days.”
Mom served me a mix of yogurt, berries, and granola. It was very tasty but not enough of it. I asked, “Mom, is this all I get to eat?”
I see Melanie’s text, “It’s the pre-prom watching your diet plan.” I text back, “But I’m hungrier than that.”
Melanie says, “You need to train your stomach to shrink and be more girl-like. That also means no seconds at school. SEE YOU THERE!” Her screen goes off.
“Mom, didn’t you put sugar on the fruit?” I could have a little more fruit because there wasn’t sugar on them.
Mom told me to check my makeup better. So I went back finished getting dressed and looked closer at my makeup. I used a makeup triangle to blend my makeup better and smooth it out. I took my triangle pad and went to find my mom. “Mom, can you check my makeup?”
She said, “That is much better, but you do have a makeup mirror on your new vanity. You should be sitting down and take your time doing your makeup. The makeup mirror is designed to help you see better what you’re doing.” She paused, having looked at me. “I think it is a little quick for Danica to wear that sundress, especially halter style. However, you look very nice, and if you want you to have my approval.” She hands me some health forms saying, “Nurse Marie needs to get these for your records.” Two were doctor statements to the school. The third was a letter signed by my parents saying I had their permission to attend school as Danica for the rest of the school year.
I was happy when the week at school was done. Several good firsts, but they were nerve-racking as I went through them.
Saturday rained, so we changed our tickets to Sunday the last game of the series between the Yankees and the St. Louis Cardinals. Harrison felt the need to explain that the Cardinals are from the National League and don’t regularly play the Yankees in the American League.
We’re over at his housekeeping his mom's company some of the time. She just started her fourteen days without any treatments. They will test her in another week to see how she has progressed. Though Melanie or her mother will be over for supper. Mrs. Deters asks me instead of her son for help. Seemingly she likes my massages.
“I’m sorry Danica, I don’t mean to embarrass you or myself. I guess I’m wanting to see it like you do that Harrison is dating a girl.”
I giggle, “I would like him seeing it that way too. I guess this in a way is a chance for me to see myself as a girl by helping you. Could you please tell me about when you went to the prom, was it with Mr. Deters?”
“No, I met him first in college and married him when we got back together.”
“My prom date in my junior year was with a senior boy named Ryan. I was sure he was my true love, so we didn’t worry about what we did. Oh my, um you can’t tell this to Harrison.”
I said, “I guess it’s a secret between us girls.”
“I was 5’ 9” which was tall then for a girl and he was a good-looking hunk much like Harris is for you. I don’t know about my son, but he was a good size where it counts. But it wasn’t the first time we made out.”
I continued the massage for another fifteen minutes. I was caught off guard, when she said, “You look at my son differently now. You were kind of afraid of him at first and were doing it more as a favor to me. Now you seem to have affection for him. I hope you will have protection if you have sex with him.”
Even my cough was that of a girl when she caught me by surprise. “You didn’t expect me to say anything, but I was hoping you and your mother or father would have already talked about this.”
“My mother and I had two nights ago. That was hard enough. She said, ‘I don’t want him to force you to do anything you’re not willing to. I raised him to be good and respect people. And I know he has grown to have affections for you. He has several pictures of you in his room and now even talks to me about you.’”
She had already told me her inhibitions were down, since her brush with death. That she often felt free to say what she thought. She even felt the need to share a hairpin of her grandmother’s. “I would like it back after the prom. My Grandmother said it was a woman’s secret weapon. If you give it to your beautician I am sure she can work it into your hairstyle. You won’t need it with Harrison but other boys maybe.”
Mrs. Deters decided to get up and get dressed after I was through with the massage and her talk with me. She was not steady on her feet. I had to help her get dressed. She did most of it, I mostly helped her keep her balance and hold at the waistband of some clothes. She’s about forty years old. Despite chemo and radiation treatments, one can see she had been a very attractive woman.
“Between Bill’s unexpected death and now my illness; life has been a giant turnaround. Between the Sinclairs and now you with Harrison, it is nice to see some sunshine in our lives.” When we stepped out of her room. She says, “Why don’t you go and find Harrison. If you take the better part of an hour, I can take care of myself. Thanks for your help and for listening to me. It was nice that you are another girl to me. I hope it helps in becoming you inside.”
I called Harrison and he was in their finished basement. I went down and he apologized for his mother wanting my help. I got myself in his arms, saying, “I am another girl to her, I like that. It’s emotional but a lot more so for her. Just hold me and don’t say any more about that.”
We were cuddled together enjoying some music videos. Supposedly we were down here because he didn’t trust himself with me in his room. When he pulls me on top of him; I can tell I am also excited to be with him.
I worked up my courage, “You know I am not used to this. I’ve thought a lot about being a girl with a guy. But I was sure it would never happen. I even think more about us together than I wish right now.”
Harrison says, “But you do know and you seem excited.” He kisses me and we roll on the couch. His hands are on my ass and I am looking at him. My skirt is going up as his hands have gone down. He pauses as to ask a question. I pulled the hem of my dress back down but then stretch and return a passionate kiss.
When he first touched me as another boy, I momentarily froze. I knew it would happen and I knew I might eventually let him. Harrison touched me, but it was his hand guiding me to him that was the big step.
The time was good but went by fast. It was soon time to fix my clothes and to check my makeup before going back upstairs. Harrison was afraid I was tired of my time with his mother and would feel bad about helping her again this afternoon.
“Your mother and I each see the other as being sweet. And we both love… like her son.”
He asked, “What were you going to say?”
The basement must be pretty soundproof as she was upstairs baking some oatmeal raisin cookies. When we got upstairs, the clanging of cookie sheets was loud and she was singing louder. Harrison coughed to get her attention and then I walked up next to her. She gave me a big hug and I soon had flour on me.
“Can I help you,” I asked? She quickly had an apron out for me to wear. I am enjoying these times of being invited to help in a woman’s kitchen.
She asked, “Has Harris been good to you?”
I smiled saying, “Yes, that’s my problem.”
She joked, “If I didn’t give you two enough time that was my fault. …He can go take a shower, but you need to learn to unwind while being creative.”
I turned to Harrison, “Did you hear your mother, get! If and when we stop dating I am keeping her.” She hugged me in agreement.
She asked me, “Do you like Italian food?’ I said ‘Yes.’
Let’s first finish the cookies. Checked the recipe I’m using and learn to copy a mother’s recipe. You can be creative of course.”
We made a second batch of cookie dough and for this one, we used butterscotch pieces. “It looks like that pleases you.”
“I was a boy, this would be for when I am pleasing your son or have a craving for sweets. My mother and Melanie are telling me I need to stay on a strict prom diet.” She hugged me.
“Yes, that is why I was making the other cookies. Maybe we should throw out this batch and take away the temptation.” She was being sweet, but I could not see throwing away a batch of cookies. She opened the oven and took out her first batch of cookies. She had another pan ready and put them in. I mixed up my batch of cookie dough some more and used a spoon to put the dough on a baking sheet. I was able to fit 12 onto the pan. She had taken the cookies off her sheet to let them cool. This time the dollops of cookie dough were smaller and I made fifteen to finish the rest of the dough and a second sheet. Two sheets are ready to go in the oven.
There was a kettle of soup I hadn’t noticed on the stove until Christine took the lid off. My mouth watered as I could smell vegetable soup simmering. She smiled, “Pease go and get your boyfriend and we’ll have a little lunch. If you’d rather, you can sit on his lap and enjoy him.” She smiles, “Most boys don’t know we can be crude and it is better they don’t know. Now go and find him.”
I went amused by the mixed messages she places in my mind. I found Harrison up in his room with his jeans back on and just putting on a tee shirt. I knocked and walked in as the door was already open.
It was liked it was as normal as could be that I walked up to him and on my tiptoes I hugged him around the neck. “You know, I’m becoming attached to you. With that I kissed him, silently praying he’d take me right there. He did hug me and added a lot to his kiss. But the longer the kiss the more certain, I knew he would back away.
“Your mother has soup made for lunch that we can enjoy if we have nothing better to do.”
His hand went to the top of my skirt and I gasped. There was just enough room for him to slip his hand down in it. His hand was even inside my panty. Harrison moaned as he enjoyed how it felt. “Danica, even if this means you are willing to give yourself to me that will need to be enough for now.”
My boyhood was bending until it hurt in my panty and needed relief that wasn’t coming. I figuratively bit my tongue, as we left is room. When we got to the kitchen I went to the refrigerator and got a glass of ice-cold water. I drank one real fast and held another to sip. The chill to my body helped enough and I quickly sat down at the table.
Mrs. Deters served me a bowl of soup and Harrison brought me my silverware. They each served themselves from the counter. I was thankful his mother started the conversation. The soup was excellent giving us something to enjoy and talk about. I had to show pictures of my prom dress again.
She told Harrison that she and I were going to make up some lasagna for supper. But she would nap until four p.m.
I didn’t know if I could manage an afternoon alone with him. I was filled with mixed emotions. “Mrs. Deters, I’m not sure I can stay for supper as I should be home with my family.”
She said, “I’ve already called your mother telling her how we’re having such a nice day. She said, she’d pick you up between seven-thirty and eight so you could get a good night’s rest for tomorrow.”
Harrison said, “I hope you won’t be upset having two days in a row with me. I’m hoping it will be three days if you can come to the game I play on Monday. We’ll be away at Middlesex but you should be able to get a ride with some of the senior girls who usually try to come.”
Mrs. Deters said, “I’m going to take a nap and we’ll make the lasagna around four. Harrison, you need to have some cookies for dessert. Danica mixed and made the oatmeal scotches.” She turns to me and asks, “Did you have as much fun as I did?”
“Harrison, I told your mother if we stop dating. I’m still going to keep her as my special friend.”
He asked, “So we are going to stay together. When did we decide that?” I felt embarrassed and quickly ran for the bathroom. I didn’t know why I said that. But I felt hurt by his questioning.
He was right behind me as I closed the door and he was apologizing. “I’m sorry Danica. I shouldn’t have joked with you like that. I was just joking with you as one of the guys. …You’re right we are going together and I am pleased we’re together.”
I sniffled, “I’m sorry I assumed it. Could you please get me my purse so I can fix my makeup? It’s lying next to my chair.” It took some time for him to find it and bring it back to me. It took another fifteen minutes for me to clean my face and redo my makeup. I went light on the lipstick anticipating our kissing again.
I am upset with myself that I have the feelings of a girl. I’m not used to it and still feel guilty at times. It seems to be more natural for me, especially when I’m around him or girlfriends. I do like being a girl but it clashes with all the years I’ve been programmed as a boy.
It took long enough for Mrs. Deters to put the dishes in the dishwasher. I helped her some and so she could go lay down.
I followed to tell Mrs. Deters I was alright and to thank her again for the morning and lunch. I soon heard a message come to my phone. It was from Melanie, “I hear you’re with my cousin. Have a good time, hehe.”
I see there were messages from Steph and Halle earlier. Steph: “Heard you didn’t go to the baseball game. I hope things are fine between you and Harrison. You looked like you were comfortable with him at their ball games.”
Halle text, “I just wanted you to know people are happy for Harrison. That he found someone as precious as you. I care about you very much. …You make a beautiful girl. Love, Halle”
I text back to each one with a short note, telling them things are good.
I asked, Harrison if we could walk around in his backyard. I had seen Mrs. Deters had a lot of flowering bushes and spring flowers. I had seen Brien and Megan walk around outside at our house. I found Harrison was good about the naming of some shrubs and flowers. But it was evident the yard had not gotten its usual spring attention.
I decided to rake one flower bed and around some of the bushes. Harrison commented that I would get too dirty. But I told him if I rake and you put the leaves and stuff in your mulch pile, I’ll be fine.
He went and changed into some work clothes. I did take off my socks and put them back on my sandals. I had raked around several bushes before he was back out. The first few minutes he spent taking pictures of me. One included a selfie with me. I did appreciate the gloves he brought out for me to wear.
We only worked a little over an hour as I didn’t want to get sweaty. I was sure his mother would appreciate what we accomplished. Harrison half-jokingly said, “You know my Mother is going to be on my case about finishing the yardwork.”
It was only 2:30 with well over an hour before his mother would be getting up. We were now up in his room as he showed me pictures of some of his friends. There were several guys he showed me that I didn’t know.
Here I was, supposedly just doing him a favor by going with him to the prom. I felt jealous that some of his friends liked him as I was beginning to. I kissed him and didn’t stop it right away. I should have known I was getting us both excited.
He put on some soft music and asked me to dance with him. The longer we danced the closer we got. My short skirt was soon up and his hands were on my buns. I found my body reacting to his hands. I whispered, “You know you’re being cruel doing that.”
He softly said back to me, “You can tell me to stop, but it was you who led me to your panties before.” My emotions were strong but mixed to the point of driving me crazy. He turned me half around. He was nibbling at my neck and ears. He had also aroused me and I could feel him pressing on me from behind.
I said, “I know I should try to get used to this before the prom. But my dreams are as Danica were usually with a girl liking me.”
I turned and faced him. I took a deep breath and loosened his belt. I hadn’t said it, but as Danica, I had also dreamt of being with a boy. I always wondered how touching another boy would feel. I was kinda hugging him from the side and slowly slipped my hand down his front.
OM, I was exciting another guy and now I was touching him. I felt him and I got lost in the smile that came on his face and kissed him.
Harrison whispered saying, “The first time can be awkward, but it’s okay about being excited?”
“Excited?” I thought I was scared, but he was correct my body was getting excited. He helped to bring my hand to him. I looked down as I felt he was warm and bigger than I thought. My hand moved slowly and it explored touching him.
We kissed again and my eyes remained closed. He pulled me close to him and walked us over to his bed. I was standing there as he knelt and was touching me. I was getting too excited and began saying I was going to burst and needed the bathroom. I ran and got there in time to sit and release my spurt out into the toilet.
When I came back to him. He lifted my chin and planted a kiss on my lips. “I’m so happy with you. I know this isn’t easy and your feelings are mixed in your head. Thanks for putting yourself through all of this.” He gave me another hug and kiss.
That made me feel good and accepted as someone special to him. I said. ”I hope that my name isn’t going to be shared in the locker room about what we have or haven’t done.”
Now I’m shaking my head ‘that my time is with Harrison. I had always dreamed a time like this would be with a girl, someone like Susan, maybe even… no don’t go there. If anything, I was disappointed that we only went as far as we did. We were on his bed being intimate enough for me and it soon was over. I found it different, I liked the taste of being with him.
However, when I saw the clock and knew I needed a quick shower and to get put back together. I worked to keep my hair dry. I suspected his Mom heard the shower and would easily guess what we might have done? But I was fairly sure she wouldn’t embarrass me by saying anything. Harrison warned me that she might, but I said I didn’t think so.
It wasn’t until I was down to the kitchen that she made her way out of her room. Greeting us and hugging me, she pulled out two clean aprons. She had me boiling the lasagna noodles as she gathered the other ingredients. She told me, where her baking ware was. I was then browning some Italian sausage to mix in with her sauce. She also had a container of ricotta cheese.
I said, “We use cottage cheese at our house.”
Christiane said, “Many do, I guess this is the way my mother taught me. I hope you will like it.”
Harrison came up from behind and cuddled me while I was working. “My Mom’s a pretty good cook. Her mom was Italian; Grandma taught her many of her old recipes and ways. I think you’ll like this.”
“You, my son can get out the loaf of bread and be prepared to make us some garlic bread.”
She said, “I do not want details but do the both of you feel like you will be able to enjoy going to the prom?”
Harrison answered first, “I’m sure we will. It will help to become closer friends. I think Danica is nicely fulfilling your wish of my date being a girl. And I see enough of Tim to be happy as well.”
She asks me, “Danica do you agree that you will be enjoying yourself?” I turned around and hugged Harrison as I went to my toes to kiss him.
“I sure I will enjoy being his date…”
Story to be continued…
Baseball, Susan and Prom Preparations
Unexpected romantic emotions with Harrison...
The reality is that I find Susan’s interest attractive…
=^_^=
Mrs. Deters and I made layers of noodles, sauce with the ground sausage, and the ricotta cheese which we did over and again, and finally the last layer of lasagna noodles with just a light basting. The lasagna was in the oven on time for us to eat a little after six. I made a salad with a little coaching by Mrs. Deters using a vinaigrette dressing. She had a radio on in the kitchen and we found ourselves singing together. In the last twenty minutes, I was able to wash up, lose the apron and relax a little with Harrison.
Each time I was around him, I found myself a little more comfortable to be with him.
We ate dinner and Christiane ate well and enjoyed her meal which she and Harrison said, wasn’t always the case.
The closer we got to seven-thirty when my mother might be coming, I worried about Christiane getting ready for bed. She was getting nervous, so I asked if there was something she needed help with.
“I could use a shower, but I’m not willing to ask that of you or your mother.”
I wasn’t sure my mother would understand my helping her with her personal hygiene. I helped her with the beginning of her shower anyway. It hurt to see how cancer and her treatments had taken a toll on her. I felt bad that I was learning about being a woman through her pain. However, it was easy to tell the shower topped off a good day. She was in her nightgown and robe before my mother arrived a little before eight o’clock.
Riding home Mom commented, “It sounds like you were burning the candle at both ends, young lady. Did you enjoy all you did with Mrs. Deters or were you forcing yourself to be nice?”
“Momma, it’s nice helping her. It was like she’s helping me to be the girl that I want to be. We even told Harrison if we stop seeing each other I will still go to see her.”
“I hope you don’t mind us talking like mother and daughter. But the more I was around Harrison I felt like a giddy girl. I knew he got excited by the way he saw me. I like being with him and I even kissed him as my boyfriend. I don’t think I got excited as a boy, but I do have feelings for him.”
My mother’s look at me is with a smile that I didn’t expect. She stopped in our driveway. “Please don’t get out yet Danica. I am not sure how to say this, but I am very happy you can talk about this with me. I hope you can agree with me that this sounds like an affirmation that you are the girl you say you are.”
“But Mom, neither Harrison nor I am the normal boyfriend/girlfriend. I will stay a girl for the remainder of the school year, but that will be enough for me. I don’t need these funny feelings. I’ll just stuff them down until I get my head back to normal. I will have done what Melanie was asking of me.”
Mom said, “If that is normal for you. I will support you in what you do, but your doctor says there are signs this is you. Even Melanie says you are more relaxed as Danica. Like before you seem to be more natural in girl mode.”
“Mommy that is what Melanie wants to believe.”
Mom leans over hugs me, “Let us go into the house. I am sure I have one very tired daughter and she has a long day again tomorrow.”
I didn’t know with my being over at Harrison’s my brother took advantage of it to have Megan over. He had Mom make Chinese pepper steak; it’s one of her specialties. Megan and Brien were happy to have the TV room to themselves. Though I suspect the TV was more or less background noise.
I poked my head into our bedroom to confirm my thought; Brien had moved into our brother’s room. I decided to leave them alone for now. It was too early to go to bed, no matter how tired I was. Instead, I decided to take off my makeup and get ready for bed. I used my lavender body wash. It was like I could smell the lasagna and cookies washed off of me.
Once out and fairly dry, I wrapped the big bath towel around me and was making sure my makeup all off and starting to cleanse and moisturize my skin. I had opened the bathroom door to freshen the air and went back to attend to my skin. That was when I heard Megan’s voice behind me. “I would make sure that towel stays on until you get to your room. You are impressively girly.
“Your mother said you were over Harrison’s house all day. How were things?” As I began to jump with her voice, I was fortunate to grab the top of the towel. She said, with a giggle, “Your breastforms serve you well.
I wanted to go over to hug and greet her but decided to wait. “Yes. It was a bummer of a disappointment not to go to the game. But I had fun helping his Mom as well as having some time with Harrison. I guess I need to thank you, girls, for getting me to relax by acting like a girl now.”
I was done there and ready to go back to my room. I grabbed Megan’s hand and took her with me. I knew she was surprised I had her come into the room. She didn’t know but my Mom had purchased a changing screen. I grabbed a pair of baby doll pajamas and slipped behind the screen.
Megan sat on my bed facing me. I asked her, “How was her day?” But I ended up telling about baking cookies and making the lasagna with Mrs. Deters. When Megan asked if I spent time with Harrison. I simply said, “Of course, I enjoy being with Mrs. Deters but I went to spend time with Harrison. Some interruptions were helpful so things didn’t go too far. He’s already sure he wants me as it prom date, but we both think it is good to know each other better than we had.”
Brien called into the room making sure Megan was there. I told him to wait we’re having a girl talk. Megan giggled and she called out. “Yes, we’re having fun. Give us fifteen minutes and I think we’ll both be out.”
I had stepped out around the screen and sat on the bed next to Megan. “I am glad you will be with us at the game.” Melanie agreed to work tomorrow so she could have the day off today.
Megan uses her finger to glide over my eyebrows. She commented on how nice they were shaped. I giggled, “I agreed with Melanie I should have them shaped as long as I was dressing as a girl until the end of the school year.”
Megan said, “Look how pretty your legs are and how comfortable you are as Danica. Do you really think it will be easy to go back to being Tim after this?”
I said, “It might not be easy, but it’s a lot of work for a boy being a girl. I think I will have had my fill of it by the time school is out.”
I was up at six excited about going to the New York Yankee-Cardinal game. Megan had loaned me a red and white baseball shirt for girls and Mom had laid out a skater shirt to wear with it. I wore two panties as she suggested to make sure everything stayed in place. The small socks and my new cross-trainers completed my look. I put my hair into a ponytail as Harrison said he would get me a baseball cap.
Brien was down to breakfast after me, but for once we were excited to be doing something together. It was cute as Dad offered us both some money, but actually gave me twenty dollars more, saying, “You’re more likely to buy things.”
Dad was driving us into the City to catch a subway to the stadium. He and Mom would stay in the city until our game was over and we were back and would meet up with them. On our way into the city, Harrison told us that Melanie had sold her tickets to Susan and Jacob Thomas. They’re to meet us in the ballpark as our seats are all together.
Megan asked if I took care of the seams of my breastforms as she unbuttons the top of my baseball shirt. They were taken care of, but I felt nervous about showing my breasts even a little. Mom checked me and laughed as I was still modestly attired. It was when we got to the stadium that Megan undid yet another button. Brien grumbled saying, “You’ve mentioned to me before how nice Megan looks relax.”
We were plenty early as the Yankees were out warming up and some players were coming around signing autographs. I had seen Aaron Judge loosening up throwing and catching but he was now running along the back of the outfield with two other players. I called to him, “Aaron Judge, Aaron Judge!” When he stopped and turned our way. I said, “Our boyfriends want us to get your autographs. We’d like selfies with you.” He and his friends came over. The security guard wanted us to lean over and get our pictures. Aaron said, “These are some of the prettiest girls we’ll see today. Let them on the field for a moment.” Sure enough, we were allowed on the field. Susan, Megan, and I posed between Aaron and Aaron Hicks. Even a TV camera came over to get our picture. Harrison and Brien both told that they were high school players.
I got the signatures of Aaron Judge, Aaron Hicks, and Clint Frazier. Megan and I were able to get a picture of us kissing Aaron’s cheeks from both sides. I was graced by him with a hug. Then he said, “Thanks for asking nicely and not being pushy.” And I felt a kiss on my cheek.”
I couldn’t help but hug him again and said, “Thanks, you’re really neat.” When I got to the railing. Harrison picked me up and swung me back over to the seats. And there was a roar from some fans. Megan says, “You gave them a little bit of a show.” I quickly pushed my skirt down but knew it was too late. Again I find myself doing something Timothy never thought he had to worry about.
Harrison had given me some money that Megan and I took to find the souvenir shop. Susan came as well and I found myself enthralled with how pretty she was. She saw me staring and asked what I was doing.
I whispered, “I don’t want to be rude and shouldn’t because I’m someone else’s date.” I became speechless in trying to say what I wanted.
She seemingly knew and said, “I think that's nice of you. We’ll be friends for a long time.”
She helped me pick out a Yankee baseball cap. Paying for it, I said, “I should have bought this first. Maybe Aaron would have signed it for me.”
The cashier in good New York fashion said, “Yeah and maybe he would kiss you and have taken you to dinner after the ballgame.”
Sue said, “Well we already kissed him and we got a picture with him. Maybe you could arrange dinner for us.”
Another woman said, “Button up and move along please.” Megan had her phone camera there and stuck our picture for the women to see.
It was a fairly crowded game as there was a fair size representation of Cardinal red, in the sea of Yankee pinstripes. Aaron Judge didn’t disappoint the Yankee fans as he hit a three-run homer his second time up. Most of the game I wasn’t watching as closely as I might. I found Harrison’s hugs distracting as well as my talking with Megan and Susan.
Come the sixth inning Melanie text me, “We saw Harrison kissing you on the TV. The three guys and cute dates warranted comments from the announcers.” Megan seeing my message. “That was at the beginning of the inning when the camera was here taking our picture.”
I asked, “Is that why he gave me a hug and kiss when I wasn’t expecting it.” Sue commented, “If you had come up for air, maybe you would have seen the TV camera.”
It was the ninth inning and the game was tied. Two runners were on base and there were two outs. Aaron Judge was up he hit the ball hard between two outfielders. Harrison, Jacob, and Brien all yell “We won!”
I’m up in Harrison’s arms, and I feel my buns cradled by Harrison as he continues to hold me. He whispers, “Thanks for sharing the day with me. I’m even more thankful for how nice you’ve been to Mom. I couldn’t have dreamed I could find someone so special.”
Brien broke the moment by repeatedly prodding us, “Hey we should get going.” It was early evening when we finally met up with our family and we're back in New Jersey before we stopped to eat. This time we were four women going to the women’s room to freshen up.
I used a stall as I hadn’t gone while at the stadium. Mom was waiting for me by the sinks asking, “So how was your day?”
Megan remarked, “She did really well. She’s becoming quite the girl.”
A woman who was in there at the same time, finally asked, “Is there a reason you two are concerned for this young lady?”
My Mom said, “Thanks for asking. It was the first time I allowed her to go to a baseball game with her boyfriend. I was worried about how she would do. It might have been a case of a mother not ready to let go of her daughter.”
The woman said, “She is fortunate if she has both a boyfriend and parents who love her.” With that, the woman finished visiting and left.
Brien pulled me aside, he said, “Danica, aren’t you getting a little too close to Harrison?” He quickly walked away.
Another day, when I went to pick up my gown, I look around the store and found a beautiful set of delicates that included a silk pair of panties, a precious bra, and a simple white lace camisole.
Melanie was happy for me as I often accompanied her to visit and take care of Mrs. Deters. Her Aunt was well enough to go out for an hour or two. Sometimes we went to the parks for sun and fresh air. This week we took her shopping. She was wanting to treat us at first. That was until Melanie and I argued whether the dress she likes or the outfit I picked was best for Aunt Christiane. Finally, we were able to get Aunt Chris to try each of them on.
Once out of the changing room Melanie and I helped her with makeup and styling her hair. Aunt Chris finally gasped as she figured out what we were really doing. “You girls have got me looking better than I have for over a year. You don’t know what this means for my spirit.” She had tried on Melanie’s dress and I agreed. She really did look very nice in it.
She wanted to change the bright pastel blue skirt for a drab gray skirt and exchange the blouse for two sizes bigger. She agreed that she would try on what I selected. Thankfully, she and the saleswoman agreed for her to try on what I selected.
She agreed that the skirt-blouse combo was very attractive to her. She put the dress back on as Melanie told her she and her mother bought it for her. Once she brought out the skirt and blouse, I went and bought them for her from me and my family.
Once back at her house we needed to sit and share some ice tea. Christiane said, “I must say, it was nice to be out with two super girls. It makes a woman feel young and alive. …Melanie that is not a big surprise coming from you, but I’m eternally grateful. You, Danica, are quite a different story. Each time I see you, you become more and more the girl I see before me.”
I must have looked very bewildered, because she said, “What I mean is and I hope I don’t offend you. You started out to do this only for Harrison’s prom and to please me. But you are becoming the precious girl you intended to portray. …Ooo I’m not sure I’m saying it right.”
Melanie moved next to me and hugging me, she said, “Yes, you said it well. Danica truly has become a girl. She’ll have a lot of trouble in trying to be Tim.”
I felt all happy and gooey inside that I began to tear up. Melanie and Aunt Chris gave me a big hug and let me cry for a moment...”
To be continue…
A Complication Before Harrison’s Prom
And romantic emotions with Harrison and Prom...
Reality is that I find Susan’s interest attractive…
=^_^=
Mothers’ Day weekend we went up to see Grandmother Rogers on my Mom’s side of the family. Grandma Rogers had encouraged my Mom to bring me along as Danica. Jodi Sinclair, Melanie, and younger sister Trudy rode up to see both Grandmother Sinclair and Grandma Cole. The closer we got to Grandma’s house, the more the memories were coming back to me. I was wondering what Melanie’s Cousins Madison and her brother Cole Taylor were going to think as I was here as Danica again.
This time the Sinclairs came with us to visit our Grandma’s first.
Grandma Rogers hugged me and wasn’t concerned if she embarrassed me in doing so. “My, my how you have grown into such a beautiful young lady. I understand you’re supposedly doing someone a favor. I was told you’re going to the school prom and staying as a girl until the end of the school year.”
Mom interrupted her, “Hopefully she has enough clothes, not to repeat too often.”
“Well I’m happy then that you are here; I heard that Madison Taylor is eager to go shopping with you. When she, Melanie, and you can go shopping, I’ll give you a gift card. Melanie’s Cousin Madison should be here soon and she is eager for the two of you to go shopping for some of your own choices. Her prom is tomorrow so you’ll also get to see her at her prettiest.”
My Mom plans to use some time to visit friends from when she was in school. Mom took Jodi and Trudy to Grandma Cole’s.
Cousin Madison, Melanie, and I went shopping and the women's shops do have some different clothes from what I had seen elsewhere. A short peachy pink skirt caught my eye and I tried it along with a camisole coordinate. But as Melanie told me, “Set it hidden away in the rack. We want the freedom to look and try on oodles of possibilities. We'll come back to it if you still want it.”
By now I am into how girls shop; having fun trying on various outfits. Madi’s gown is in and before paying for it, she tried it on again. She made sure it fitted properly and show it off to us. I like the puffy short sleeves that are worn just off her shoulders.
We were back to selecting outfits and dresses to try. Taking a break we went to the food court where groups of Madison’s friends were. We could tell there was one who was not very happy. The irony was that it was Lisa who gave me a hard time when I first came here as Danica. We found out that a girl from Penfield had just called Lisa last night. She was backing out as her prom date. Lisa is kind of a distant cousin to me, but not and years ago when I first came as Danica she enjoyed giving me a difficult time.
Distant cousin or not we’re like good friends that pick up where we left off. The big difference is as with Danica, my feelings are in tune with how Lisa must feel in being given sad news unexpectedly.
Then I saw Melanie and her cousin Madi looking at me. When I caught what they were thinking of, I said, “No way? I love Lisa but there is no way that this works.”
Madison speaks to Lisa, “I have a good idea how to help you, but I need to talk with you alone before I talk the other person into going with you.”
I hadn’t heard what she said, I was left alone with my imagination of what they were talking about. She walks with her far enough to be outside our ability to hear them. Lisa looked over at us twice. I thought of numerous reasons why it wouldn’t work for me to be Lisa’s date. I didn’t have time to get ready; I’d need a salon appointment. Though I have my gown to show Grandma. I want my prom gown first used at my prom with Harrison.
Lisa desperately wanted to go to her prom, but she backed off when Madison told her. “If you’re okay with someone like Danica we can probably get you a date.”
A smile creeps onto her face, “Are you in fact talking about Danica that would be great. But how is she going to be able to get a gown, and a salon appointment in time?”
Madison told Lisa, “You must put on a sad face to communicate a broken heart until she gives in.” In good temper tantrum form, Lisa kicks a chair across the food court. It was then Melanie and Madison went to work on me as Danica.
The fates were with them as Debbie Montross was just calling. Debbie had been my beautician those many years ago. And she had done my hair again once since then.
Debbie called, “Danica, I heard you were back in town and my niece just lost her prom date for tomorrow. I know this is unfair, but she’s special. If you would be willing her Mom is willing to spring for a special gown that you could wear and even keep if you want. What do you say? We could sweeten the pot a little more, but then I’d question your motive.”
I asked, “Does her first name happen to be Lisa.” Debbie responds, “How did you know?”
“Some friends are already trying to convince me to do it, but I don’t want to. And I’m hoping my Mom will agree with me.”
Debbie says, “Your Grandmother won’t. And as early as tomorrow morning many of us will be loving you for it. I will even do your hair. You should get your ass to the Gown Shack. The first three gowns out for you to try on are my suggestions. The one costing over a thousand dollars is something you will never again get a chance to wear let alone own it.” Believing she has me hooked, she says, “I will need you at our shop at 6:00 a.m. to work you in. I am glad you’re going to help. Bye, I’ll see you in the morning.”
I turn to Madi and Melanie; they already figured out that I’m doing it. “I’m supposed to get to the Gown Shack immediately to select a gown.” I then ask, “What kind of place has gowns but calls itself a ‘Shack’?”
Madi says, “When you see it, you will see the irony of the name.”
We quickly excused ourselves and Madison’s older sister is driving us there. She laughs as she's driving. "Weren’t you trapped into looking like a girl when you first came here?”
Melanie blurted out, “It was Tim’s fault then and Danica’s choosing to do it this time. Plus next weekend Danica is going to a prom with her boyfriend Harrison.”
The Gown Shack is a converted mansion. Many of its customers help Helene Forrest to keep her dream alive. During the 2008 recession, she was in trouble and in danger of losing the place. Eleven of her patrons came forward and paid five to thirty-five thousand dollars to help her save it.
The Gown Shack is just the opposite of the shack it sounds to be. Helene Forrest greeted us at the door. “Are you the special person to do this? I think you will be well rewarded with a prom gown that will be your go-to gown for any formal.”
“I’m only pretending to be a girl to help someone else by going to his prom in another week.”
Helene said, “From what I’ve seen of some others like you; denial is normal for you. If I am correct you can’t deny you’re liking this.” She said, “You call the boy you’re going with your boyfriend. That makes it clear enough to me.”
Lisa’s Mom is there and takes me over to three gowns that she and Deb chose for me to consider. I walk up close for a better look at each and each is beautiful and in vogue for today’s look. There are no prices on the gowns. It is not hard to figure out which of the three is the most expensive, but I had seen a picture of Lisa’s gown. Either of the other two would go better with it. Picking the most expensive gown would be like announcing I was doing it in part for the dress. Lisa found a dress like hers and in comparing them, I chose the pink gown with tooling and pink roses embroidered around the lower half of the gown.
I tried the gown with Lisa’s lookalike next to it. They complimented one another beautifully. Helene called over a seamstress, and I am taken by how nice two simple changes changed the fit and improved the look of the gown on me.
Helene says, “You. Lisa and another couple get to stay the night in a luxury suite. And I remind you the gown is being given to you at no cost.”
I stood my ground and said to Madi and anyone else listening, “Madi, I am willing to go with Lisa to the Prom and act appropriately, but I am not going to promise to do anything more.”
Lisa steps in, “Don’t worry, it will be more like a fancy sleepover. I think it will be a good time, but nothing more is expected or would be forced on you.”
The next half hour was pure pleasure with two women helping me to put on the gown and pin it. Supposedly it is to be ready for me in the morning at the salon where Debbie works.
Lisa takes me out and we walk around to become friends. I am surprised by how warm and soft her lips are when we kiss. I can’t help but correlate this to what I hope to find with Susan Reed. But this isn’t pretending, this is real, and being with Lisa excites me. We didn’t stay out late. Lisa knew where Grandma Rodger lives, and walked me to the door.
Before she left she had to meet my mom, again. “I thank you for allowing me to take Danica to my prom on such short notice.”
As requested, I’m at the salon at six in the morning. The time at the salon is wonderful. My own hair with its extensions went well with the hairstyle Deb was suggesting. This is my feminine side that I could get used to. My nails reflect the pinks and the white of my gown.
I met Tonya and Myla two of Lisa’s friends that will at the prom. We took time for something to sip on and visit before going our separate ways.
Come, the prom it’s new for me to be dancing with another girl. Lisa treats me to a great time at her prom as did her friends. The good news was her friend from Penfield had not been a longtime girlfriend. Lisa and I did well dancing together and I worked hard to help her to have a good time.
We had gone to the after-prom party for a short time, seemingly Lisa was only interested in putting in an appearance. I had asked to go home after that. But now, I was having too much fun being with Lisa that I changed my mind. Melanie had anticipated the possibility and had me take a satin satchel with some delicates.
I could blame my actions on the possibility that I took the spiked punch, but it was purely me and feelings that were coming forward for Danica. I had kissed Lisa once as we were dancing. It was easy to see that our affections for one another were soon mutual.
“Danica, I’m attracted to you as a woman. If you’re not comfortable being in the same bed or room, I can stay out here. I appreciate everything you’ve done to make this night special for me.”
I step towards her and I’ve picked up my skirt to do so. “Please don’t apologize. If I didn’t want to be here, I would have gone back to Grandma’s. I may ask to stop sometime, but I feel an attraction to you as well.”
The other girl was Rachel, Lisa’s best straight friend with her boyfriend Todd. Seemingly, they were quite comfortable with Lisa and her dates. Rachel even put on some mood music we could dance to before each couple went their way.
Lisa encouraged me to use the bathroom to change. There was an extra panty with a note awaiting me. “Please pardon my insistence, but if it causes you to change your mind, I’ll understand. I have no interest in your boy parts nor do I want to chance of getting pregnant. I request that you wear this panty with or in place of your undie.”
I’m sure my giggle could be heard by Lisa. I liked the camisole and the loose-fitting briefs Melanie had chosen. Though it is a bit embarrassing that one of my best friends knew what I was wearing and likely up to tonight.
We were both very shy and uncertain in responding to the other, despite our attraction being quite strong. Lisa was kissing me as she finally guided one of my hands to her breasts. She whispered, “And in case you don’t know a girl being warm and moist down by her legs is good. Just remember girls are more sensitive to a gentle touch.”
The tips of Lisa’s fingers over my back caused a sensation that she continues as it brings a warm response from me. We kiss with more passion as our hands caress the body of the other. It is a joy to discover some touches are more pleasurable. A hand goes to the inside of her upper legs and it is very pleasing to Lisa, but she becomes impatient. And guides my hand, fingers, to touch her gently. The warm moist edge and inside is a discovery of entering a new part of a woman’s world. Our kisses become warm, gentle, compassionate. That is duplicated as I caress her other warm moist lips with my fingers. The sighs that come from Lisa come with whispers encouraging me not to stop. My own body has become greatly sensitized to Lisa’s caressing touches as well.
Lisa had moved and my fingers are trapped between her lower lips and my thigh and she is moving to increase the sensation she is feeling. One of her thighs is rubbing me in a way that arouses me as well. I thought I knew everything about how my body might respond but this is blowing my experiences in new ways. I became nervous and wanted to stop before more happened.
Lisa said, “But we might have an explosion of feelings. It hasn’t happened to me, but I hear it’s wonderful.”
“You might not like a boy exploding, plus I’d think we should be in love more.”
“Enough!” Lisa says empathically, “You’ve disrupted the moment, I’ ewe.” But she hugged me anyway, ”I’m happy Danica’s here.” Soon we’re back to being Lisa and Danica. “I do care a lot about you.”
“But do you love me already,” I asked? We hugged, “I feel like I’m starting to, but then I think about my other prom.”
The mood is definitely changed then... We fall asleep, though it was a restless sleep for me. I showered and got dressed as did the others. Going to breakfast after a prom is so neat. People look at you, you’re not quite as beautiful as before, but the gowns and we are still very pretty. Other women can’t help knowing and some compliment us. One person asked where the other two boys were, thinking there must have been three couples.
Lisa’s Father picked us up after breakfast; he laughed upon seeing me, “I can’t believe my daughter was able to find someone so nice and attractive as you, Danica. I hope you don’t mind if I tease your Uncle Scott how pretty some of the boys are on his side of the family.”
Once back to Grandma Rogers, I was greeted with a big hug by Mom and Grandma Rogers. I said, “Happy Mothers’ Day, to both of you! I’m jealous, I can’t be a mom too!”
Grandma Faye hugs me, “You would make a good mother too. I could easily see you as a beautiful bride…”
I was dressed as Danica as I sat next to Grandpa and we enjoyed watching a baseball game together. He didn’t say much, but I was moved when he said, “Tim, I love you even as Danica. I’m sorry we sometimes joke too much.” I wanted to speak up and promise I wasn’t Danica, but I remained quiet knowing better.
After our time celebrating Mother’s Day, it was time to pack up and head home. Riding home, Jodi Sinclair and mom were busy talking and not paying attention to us. Melanie’s younger sister was looking over my shoulder when she blurted out. “Melanie! She’s got messages both from Lisa and Harrison!”…
To be continued…
Prom Preparations, Expectations
Romantic emotions with Harrison and Prom...
Susan’s Still Attractive…
=^_^=
Going to school as Danica is now becoming my routine. I’m counting off this is the 20th day before school ends. I saw Harrison earlier and remember I have growing feelings for him. With Lisa, the feelings are different as she is further away, even though with my tablet she has some of my attention. Harrison gave me a quick hug as we passed in the hall.
Melanie’s there and quickly reads my thoughts, “Don’t go there, it’s not about what you are, you care about him and he loves you. We have a big week ahead, relax and let yourself enjoy being Danica.” I thanked her, I marvel at the close friends we’ve become. She has her other friends and she’s just a special friend different from Lisa or Harrison.
It was Tuesday after school that I stopped by at the Deter’s home. I was delightfully surprised to see Christiane. Her eyes sparkled and her skin had some color. “I’m happy to see your smile, Danica,” she said, “I was hoping you’d see the difference. Last week was my last set of treatments before they take some new scans and assess my health.”
She said, “Last week my oncologist asked what was different? He said I had a different spirit and my will to live was back… All I could come up with was you were in my life as well as Harrison going to his prom. The oncologist thinks your friendship with Harris is good medicine for me. …I told him most definitely, but that it was your massages and our friendship as well.”
I found myself moved and ready to cry when Christiane began to apologize for upsetting me. Something inside confessed it was something more, “It is not just you Mrs. Deters. I get upset by how much I like being Danica. I talk and feel with you and others, more than I felt and do as Tim. I try denying that I like being me and the way I can talk with you and others.”
She asks, “Does it hurt that Harrison sees you as a boy and you as a girl?”
I said, “No, someone reminded me today that is because it’s about love more than sex. Actually, I’m hoping we’re comfortable liking the other as he or she is.”
Mrs. Deters giggles, “I don’t think you need to worry about that.” We hug and go share tea and some sweet bread.
I hadn’t meant to stay but I’m there after 6:00 when Harrison got there. He’s hot and sweaty from practice as he gives me a big hug and kisses. “How’s my girly boy today?” He’s lifted me and one hand is under my buns as he hugs me. It is not any girl that he’s after, nor has he called me ‘girly boy’ unless we're alone.
He lets me down and I smooth out my skirt and blouse, “Yes, I know, I’m your boyfriend as well. I love you too, but I came to see your mother.” His mother insisted that he drive me home and he did.
Wednesday was school miss-match day, and Thursday was pajama day, but every year a few more tempt the school to call it off with the scant clothes some of us wear.
Monday through Wednesday, we had plenty of rain and as fate would have it I passed by my old sliding hill numerous times and I stopped at Melanie’s house to visit with her mother. Mrs. Sinclair showed me files of her photos of Danica, even two of me after I took my first bath there and was dressed and playing with Melanie’s sister Trudy, and one of me having my fingernails first painted by Susan. That was extra funny as neither Susan nor I had any thoughts that we’d become good friends.
I laughed again when Melanie’s mom asked me to call her Jodi as she was Aunt Jodi to Harrison. “I hope you never hold it against me that I’m the one who got you involved with the Deters?”
I said, “I know quite a few people feel bad that I’m Harrison’s prom date, but I would never want you to be one of them. It began out of sympathy for Mrs. Deters, but I think in reality I was Danica or a Darby Sue way before the incident with the muddy mess. I don’t think I could have been any luckier than when I chose your house here to stop at. I bet I looked like the dirty rascal I was.”
Jodi giggled, “It was a time you looked up at me like a little puppy all matted with mud and I saw a cute puppy that I fell in love with. After you were bathed between your longish hair and being in Melanie’s clothes there was no way I could send you home to your brothers. Somehow, your presence with Dad Sinclair’s death eased my grief and helped me to be there for my girls…”
“Your mom informed me two years ago that Danica/Darby Sue never fully left you. I thought the odds were against you helping Harrison, but I thought as Melanie’s friend and knowing what I did; it deserved a chance. I am now worried about you and Harrison being together.”
I asked, “Are you worried that we won’t or that we will have a good time and enjoy one another?”
“You sound like a girl teasing her Aunt Jodi.”
Danica’s happy saying, “I’m not saying any more about that. I am glad to have Melanie as one of my best friends. I can even squeeze in some of her clothes though the skirts are a bit short and my shoulders are different.”
I said, “Aunt Jodi, can I confess that I don’t think it is going to be easy just to be Tim anymore?”
“I don’t think those who love you,” she said, “automatically expect it to be. I think your parents, Christiane and myself as well as your friends just hope in time you find who you are.”
“But what would you think of me, if Harrison causes me to become gay,” I asked?
She hugs me, “I don’t think a dress makes you a girl, and I don’t think an experience makes you a homosexual. I suspect that you’ll find you’re transgender but that will be for you to find out some time. Right now I think you’re one of the healthiest young people I know.”
“Is your mother going to take you to your salon appointment in the morning or would you like me to take you?”
“My Mom is looking forward to doing it. She was going to offer to take Melanie but I was sure you wanted to do that.” Jodi gave me a squeeze, “Good thinking.”
Friday during and after school we girls got together as many times as we could; sharing pictures of our gowns and chosen hairstyles. Some even showed sexy panties and bras. While Melanie knew I had some it was not for others to know, not even our ‘rents.
I still kept my friendships with Stewart and Ben. They were the two guy friends who were most comfortable with me as Tim becoming Danica. Bill Majors a friend of Harrison’s was a self-appointed protector nowadays when I present as Dani. You might have guessed Dani is Harrison’s preferred name for me presenting as Danica. I don’t prefer everyone calling me that but it’s become natural with Bill and Harrison.
Since I’ll be busy at the salon and getting ready tomorrow for the prom; I go again to see Christiane. She’s having another good day and is awaiting word on her last CAT scan. Her doctor’s appointment is this coming Tuesday.
I know she anxious, but she insists it is all for Harrison. “I was afraid I wouldn’t be feeling this good or even wanting to be here now. You agreeing to be here for Harrison gave me the spark I needed. I can’t say thank you enough.”
I responded, “And you’re my inspiration to look and find my love for your son. I have no problem being the girly boy he sees me be. I see myself as a beautiful girl, yet I know I’m also Tim. Even if I were present as Tim, I’d happily wear his ring.” Yes, Monday he asked me to wear his ring; for us, that means I’m his special person.
I had hoped Harrison would come home before I left, but Mrs. Deters reminds me he’s playing two games today instead of having one tomorrow.
I went home to shower and change, staying fresh is something I do much better as Danica. I have a short visit with my parents promising to be home by 10. Melanie and I are going together to Halle’s house to be with a bunch of others girls. It started as a normal girls' gathering, but come eight a bunch of guys showed up. Melanie’s Travis was soon there and I was feeling left out of it and wanted to leave. I had even found my light coat before I hear Harrison call to me. “Sorry, I’m late. I didn’t know about getting together and I wanted to check on my Mom. I guess it’s a force of habit.”
I said, “Well at least you changed your shirt and washed, you smell better than most of the guys.” Eternity for Men was a new fragrance for him. I was with him when he bought it, but this was the first time since then that I recognized his wearing it. I had only used a drop of Melanie’s Love Spell and was glad they didn’t clash. Between his fragrance and his own scent, it was nice to be close.
That some guys were excited including Harrison, didn’t surprise me. And I was glad that Halle insisted that she had spiked two of the bowls as little as they would be. Anyone getting drunk would be out. Her parents there gave her enough authority. When Rick was asked to leave it was neither a surprise nor a problem.
That I didn’t get home until 11:00 was not a surprise to my ‘rents, and I was happy that it was insisted. We had left the party at 10:30 and had enough time. It gave us time to kiss, and snuggle together. It would have surprised me as early as two weeks ago to ponder what I was hoping for tomorrow night. I was in love and I had decided I wouldn’t pass it up.
My gown was hung up on a special hanger on my closet door. I enjoyed getting out my bra, panty, stockings, and body shaper for when I came back from the salon. There on top of my dresser was a necklace, two bracelets, and a sapphire ring in a wooden box near an old jewelry box. My Mom promised me a jewelry box if I decided to stay as Danica. I was dressed in nice workout leggins and a zip-up top.
My mom drove me as I expected and took some photos as she saw me into the salon. Patricia my beautician soon greeted me at the desk and took me to her station. I had three styles I was choosing from and Patti recommended two I should choose between. “I like your choice, I think it’s the best.” That made me feel good.
She asked, “Will it be okay if I shape and thin your eyebrows to go with your hairstyle and look?”
Melanie is soon next to me, and we giggle looking at each other in the mirror. I’m not sure when or how Patti and Melanie’s stylist realized I was a boy. Patti smiled as I said, “I’m only Dani to my date, otherwise I’m Danica.”
Patti says, “To me, you’ll be the most beautiful girl there.” Later she asks, “Are you the one going with Harrison?”
I lift his ring hanging from my neck, “His boyfriend/girlfriend however you look at it I love him.”
Pattie smiles, “He is very handsome.” Even as Danica the salon appointment is changing my appearance. Part of me is afraid, I’m becoming too beautiful for Harrison’s taste.
Melanie must have read my mind as Patti was fixing my hair at the last. “Danica, he knew you’d look beautiful and he wants you to be happy for yourself. He knows his mother will love seeing how beautiful you are.”
It is after one when I get home and my Dad and Brien are there as I come through the door. Brien says, “Megan warned me that little sis will be beautiful.” Cousin Lisha is coming over to help you and mom to get your gown on without hurting your hair and makeup.
Cousin Lisha is twenty-something, lives over twenty miles away, and is related on Dad’s side. I haven’t seen her in years and never as Danica. Mom giggles, “It’s her or Ms. Drake two houses down. She’ll be here after 3:00.”
I was fit to be tied waiting that long to get dressed. I had changed into a skirt and a buttondown blouse before Lisha got here. Lisha confessed, “Your mother had sent me a picture of you and the gown. I had seen a picture of the younger you dressed as a girl. It is nice how you have blossomed.”
I had gone to the toilet one more time and it was well after 4:00 when I’m finally in my gown. My hands were shaking as I reached for my makeup. “I’ll do it until your hands get steadier; don’t worry you’re not the first to shake for a moment.” Lisha, not my mother was enjoying zipping and buttoning up my dress. It was nearly five when Lisha, Mom, and I agreed my makeup was done and my jewelry was right. I stepped into my 3” heels as Lisha spritzed a spray of Ambush into the air and I walked through it. When I looked in the mirror I was both happy and surprised to see the glimmer of my cleavage, under the chiffon tooling of my gown.
It was mere minutes before I heard a car drive up. Harrison had his mother’s Chrysler 300 and I could tell it had been finely detailed. If Melanie hadn’t told me about all the pictures I would have been screaming the next few hours. My parents had pictures taken of me alone, with my parents, Brien and Megan. And now there were more pictures with Harrison and me and my brother and Megan with us.
We went back to see Mrs. Deters for pictures there. There were two other aunts and a few cousins there as well. Melanie was there with Travis as Jodi wanted to see me in my gown and all made up. When I went to get my compact, I looked in my clutch purse and saw a third condom in it. I touched up my lipstick though it was still good. The pictures seemed endless, only Melanie and Harrison’s smiles helped me endure them.
Story to be continued…
Prom with Harrison
The Prom with Harrison...
=^_^=
I hardly ate a thing though we went out for a special dinner before the prom. The saving grace, if I had to pee, was that Melanie would go with me to help with my dress.
I’ll never forget our entrance to the prom and a lot of Harrison’s were applauding as Harrison Deters and I were announced. We applauded others, but this sent shivers down my arms. The love or respect that others had for Harrison was so moving. Harrison said it was as much for me. We were at a table for eight that included Halle and her date, Megan Rossi and Brien, as well as Steph Demure and her date. I couldn’t have been at a more special table. Steph, Megan, and Halle had been the senior girls who encouraged me to relax and blossom as a girl. They encouraged Harrison to let Danica, as well as Dani, be there for the prom.
While I was impressed with how the other girls, their gowns and hair looked; I felt an extra glow as I too was looking beautiful. Maybe I wasn’t as great, but neither did I detract from them or Harrison. Whenever we danced or walked around greeting others he was Harris and I was back and forth from Dani to Danica. I don’t think others cared about the specialness of being Dani. The prom officially ended at midnight, but like others, it was fifteen to twenty minutes later before many of us said our last goodbyes.
We were to be in cottage eleven and I guess Harrison had picked up the room key earlier. I saw other cars that I half recognized and felt eyes watching as we went into our room. I knew the car lights of Steph and her date lit up our doorway.
Harrison was going into a short speech of what I didn’t have to do when I used a finger to shush him. “You’ve been right most of the evening; Dani and I’m delighted to be with you.”
I let him help me out of my gown and I hung it up properly. I use the bathroom to change into a baby doll set. I ask Harrison to look away so I can get into bed. He faked me and caught me scooting to the bed. “You don’t need to be afraid of my seeing how pretty Danica is, I know that’s important to you.” He gives me a hug and kisses and we are both moved. Letting me go, he closes his eyes again, and I am quickly under a sheet.
I so want to be beautiful for him, yet I know I’m Dani and I am willing as well. He jests as he undresses before me, “I hope you’re not disappointed if I don’t glamour myself as much?” Though as he steps out of his trousers I realize he has on satin underwear. He did use the toilet and he washed carefully before coming to bed. I was moved by how warm and tender his touch was.
When he laid down next to me I could tell his body stirred and he was excited we were together. We had intentionally decided we would take time to be romantic. When I slid my hand from his chest downwards, I gasped in anticipation of touching him. My hand first glided over the top of his satin shorts rose like a tent. I was nervous as I reached inside. He whispered an excited ‘boo’ and as I jumped he hugs me and kissed me.
One of his hands slid down on my seat and I was now becoming more excited as well. My hand went around and hugged his back as we came together. I could feel his manhood pressing against me. One thought said I should be repulsed, but my heated emotions were getting the best of me. I felt his strong shoulders and arms as I kissed his lips. I moved to roll on top of him and my legs moved to straddle his body.
Harrison rolled our bodies and said, “Now who has who?”
“I’ll happy to be to change where I am,” I said smiling at him. “But I have a tube of Vaseline that I’d appreciate you using.”
He said, “I’m glad great minds think alike.” He reached and handed me my clutch purse and I handed him the tube.
He asked, “Would you roll off so we can each help the other?” He had a goop of jelly and was applying between my cheeks and I was applying some from my fingers and palm stroking his hardening manhood. Yes, I was responding too. He used two fingers to press inside of me. I sensed he was seeking to widen or relax my opening, I was more excited than worried.
Harrison suggested I roll over but I was wanting to look at him. He helped to lift me as I guided him to me. Feeling his head beginning to push against me, I was afraid I was being stretched too much when my opening gave way and he moved inside me. There was this strange and overwhelming feeling as I felt him moving inside me. There were emotions I had neither expected nor felt before.
Harrison asked, “You feel that? Does it feel good?” I was sure he knew the answers. His cock began to withdraw and I was scared of losing him, afraid he changed his mind. But he was still inside of me when he pushed into me again. It was then that my legs knew to wrap themselves around him. The first time, it was Harrison who knew what to do and I was learning. All I knew was my feelings were rising and then soaring and soon his precum was hot and slippery. When he erupted inside of me; my senses erupted as I had nothing to relate the experience to. I began to kiss and grab onto Harrison. I wanted him to continue whatever he was doing, but I also heard me asking to stop and then saying no. Finally, I hugged him with my arms, legs, and lips until we began to melt together.
“Gee Harrison, do you think that is the way a girl feels?”
He lightly chuckles, “Wow Dani, you couldn’t have responded better if you tried!” Guilt made me quickly wanted to be upset.
Harrison had me like another guy, and I liked, no loved the experience. It was like dueling banjoes, Dani and Danica, both filled with feelings. From the salon on it couldn’t have been better for Danica. I loved my gown and how feminine I looked in it. Even making out once the unexpected feelings came over me. I was taking it in as Danica.
Harrison hugged me to soothe me. He knew my cry was as Dani, “You’re okay, Dani; I love your softer side. You are beautiful. I thought you were ready, I felt guilty when I was younger.” We were quiet as my tears quieted. I felt good to be in his arms and that he cared about me.
It was when he moved to clean himself I realized he was wearing a condom for me.
I had wanted to give Harrison a good time, first for him pleasing his mother’s wish, but somewhere along the way, I developed deep feelings for Harrison. I knew before we began how far I was willing to go to make his day. What I hadn’t known was what it would be like: Tim, Dani, or Danica, I was all the same person. How am I to see myself in all that just happened?
Melanie’s words echoed in my head, “Tonight isn’t about right or wrong but love.”
There was something else back in my mind from something Melanie had told me. “If you’re a girl you’ll be ready again, but you’ll have to wait upon the Harrison.”
Heck, she’s right, I could enjoy him again right now, but I knew as Tim it doesn’t just happen like that for a guy. Harrison rolled off of me and I found my hands feeling him, caressing wanting to please him and to help him recover. I nibbled at him with small tender kisses. I wasn’t holding a girl as you feel her waist being small yet sleek as you move to the curve of her hips. He feels good, but he has more mass and muscle. There is a tenderness to the touch of his hands but it’s different. His lips are tender and warm, but also firmer and despite having shaved somehow his face feels rugged.
We talked about baseball something we both know. We talked about the corsage he gave me, two beautiful flowers framed in baby’s breath, greens, and ribbon. My gown was hanging nicely and while his tux coat was over a chair, his pants, vest, and shirt were on the floor.
I knew it was well over a half-hour when Harrison was active and his vitality returned. He seemed sincere saying, “Thanks for allowing me to make love to you. You don’t need to do anymore.”
I giggled, “You know better, don’t you? We both want each other.”
He was aroused and we had fun together more than I’m willing to admit here or elsewhere. I had showered, change my panties, and put my prom gown back on before going home.
I looked like most any other girl being walked to her house by her date. Like the other couples we kissed and shared our pleasantries and I went in before Harrison went home.
I wasn’t worried when mom came to see if I had a good time. She knew I was with Harrison; she didn’t explore much more than if I had a good time and he was my prince. I need to clean off my makeup and I cleansed and moisturized my skin. Skincare had by now become a common part of Danica’s routine. Instead of talking more and having breakfast, I chose to go to bed.
My sleep world was filled with dreams and memories of the prom and last night. My Mom commented when I awoke was that I must have had good dreams as I was always smiling when she looked in on me.
“You looked in on me?” Then as she said, I saw a chair across from my bed where a mom sat part of the time as she watched her daughter…
Between not having breakfast nor much to eat last night, I was now hungry. “Danica, let me warn you before you shuffle a lot of food down. If you’re like some girls that could cause cramps and a mess at the other end.”
Mom made me a chicken salad sandwich and gave me broccoli, carrots, and some cauliflower. It was nice for Danica’s figure, and it satisfied my immediate cravings.
I’m sure I would have soon raided the kitchen for more, except Melanie called and we got talking. I hid away, use my earbuds, put on some music to stop others from listening in. Melanie quickly asked, “What did you do that made both Aunt Christiane and Harrison so happy?”
She shouted, “You what?” When she found out I was Danica for her aunt and Dani for Harrison.
“You didn’t tell me you were going that far.”
I lied, telling her, “I wasn’t sure what I would let him do?”
“I think you loved him enough to do it, didn’t you?” Melanie laughed. “You were surprised by how nice it felt, weren’t you? You and I need to get together...”
I said, “Stop right there; tell me about your night with Travis. And don’t leave the good stuff out.” I think she described more than she planned to, but for me, it was a sweetness to Danica’s ears.
Monday school would continue and I would continue to be Danica, just a more complex person than before. I received a text from Lisa. She hoped I had a good time but wasn’t wanting to hear about it. She did well in stirring up feelings from our time and our relationship. I could feel myself slip back down to reality.
Brien’s Megan came over after school, but she came to see me. Megan said, “I care about you, even apart from Brien, you’re like another little sister or friend. I want to encourage you to take time to find yourself. That is apart from Harris, Lisa, Susan, or others. Please don’t rush to decide a lot.” We hugged, we hared pictures we had of each other and the prom.
It was Tuesday after school that I went to see Mrs. Deters. She had washed two loads of clothes and cleaned much of her house. I could tell she had tired herself out. Instead of telling her, she did too much, I put on a kettle of water for tea, and I went to where she often kept her sweetbreads. There was a half loaf or banana and nut bread. I used the microwave to warm it up slightly so it would taste fresh. I got out her soft butter and the cups for tea with a teabag for each.
She says, “If I didn’t know better I would think you came here for me and not Harrison? I thank you for your kindness to me and for that, we have become good friends. I would love to hear about what you thought of the prom?”
I say, “You know better than myself that Harris is at baseball practice. Even after he gets home he will be hot and sweaty, and by the time he is not, I will need to be home. I think I love Harris, but I know I love and care about you.” With that, I was pouring the hot water into her ceramic kettle to savor as tea.
She knew better than I the time needed before it would be good and ready to pour into our cups. She had gotten out the small individual plates for our slices of bread. I watched as a young girl wanting to learn more from her mother.
I talked about eating little at the prom dinner, the other students celebrating Harrison having a date, and how wonderful the prom was. He showed me a picture she had made and framed of Harrison and myself from when we were here. It turned out beautifully, but part of me was not happy that there was evidence that I went to the prom with another boy. She taps my hand, concerned about my sad look.
“Yes, it was a beautiful night and I had a wonderful time. I am glad you had us practice dancing together,” I said.
She concerned, “He treated you well and respected you, didn’t he?”
I was afraid she was wanting me to say more, but no, just, “No, he was ever the gentleman and the whole night was wonderful. I think you raised him well.”
Mrs. Deters said, “He said you were the best of Dani and Danica. I gather that means you both enjoyed yourselves at the prom. I so hope and wish to believe that it was a special time for both of you. It was a special time for me as a young woman, and I hope it was for you.” She gave me a hug with the sound of a kiss only my ear could hear.
She continued, “You and Melanie are like my own daughters. Your spirits helped me through some dark hours. Loving my son was better than loving me.”
It was Sunday, before the last week of school. Mom had walked me to my room after dinner. Either my Dad and Brien would be cleaning up or we’d have to do it later. Mom says, “I expect both Tim and Danica to both feel free to continue. I believe you’re both, but your father and I want to support you in making that decision.” She becomes quiet, and I have no problem knowing what a ‘pregnant pause’ might be. She is giving me the time and space to share what it means for me.
“Mom, I think you’re the one here, because you already know I’m more comfortable as Danica and Dani where Harrison is concerned. Part of me sees me as Dani only with Harrison, and part of me hopes in college he moves on apart from me. If and when that happens I will hurt and cry.” Mom hugs me and she says, “Dani, you need to know I love and respect you.”
My voice changes the little it does when I’m Dani, “You’re not at all ashamed of me, Mom?”
“Not the slightest, nor do I want you to be.”
Story to be…