I had signed up for the “Vicksburg’s First Annual Womenless Beauty Pageant” because it was being held to provided relief for the Yazoo Delta, a diamonded shaped region of land that started in Greenville, Ms and ended in my own town The region was known for three things, dockside gambling, cotton, and the Blues. It was also covered in seven feet of water from point to point. The money raised from the pageant was to be used to provided relief from the flood water and help the people of that region recover.
Charity aside, I will say this, I’ve always been on the soft side. I’m the second son of William and Isabella Bell, of the Vicksburg Bells, now before I go any further let me say something. The Bell family is one of the leading families of Vicksburg, we rank among the finest families of the city. And with that position carried with it a certain sense of noblesse oblige.
And thus, having been born into the bourgeoisie of Delta society, I felt it only right that I sign up for such a pageant. That and I wanted to explore the world afford only to the female of the species. My mother, Isabella Bell who herald from Jackson, the state capital had been thrilled with the idea. Having come from a city of almost a half million souls, she always considered Vicksburg to be something of a cultural backwater if you will.
The contest was to be held at the “Vicksburg Convention Center” a handsome brick building located down on Catfish Row. The convention center was the social and cultural center of Vicksburg and the surrounding region if you will. It was also home to Mississippi’s third annual anime convention “Magnolia Anime Festival” or “Magnolia Fest”. It was the third oldest anime convention in the state and the third largest. Coastcon down in Biloxi was the states oldest, followed by MetroCon in Jackson. But I ramble now.
I arrived at the convention center a full hour and a half before the event. Mom wanted us to arrive early so we could secure a dressing room. In her hand, she carried a make-up kit, and in the other, she carried a box of beauty supplies and styling tools. In my hand, I carried the dress, a formal, pink, sparkling gown. And in the other I carried a box of shoes, four-inch high heels, mom demanded that I wear high heels to the event.
“Come along dear.” Mom said as she led the way. “We need to get you ready for the big event.” Mom reached the two double doors that lead into the lobby first. She opened up and held it open for me. As I passed through the lobby I noticed that the whole floor was filled with boys and their mothers. Some where chatting among themselves and others where eyeing each other, sizing each other up if you will. The moms too sized each other up. There was a tension in the air and you could almost cut it like a knife.
I felt a dozen pairs of eyes focused in on me as I walked up to my mom's side, who guided me toward the front desk. Behind the desk there stood a woman dressed in a nice business suit, her brown hair was pulled back in a tight bun and her deep blue eyes seem to sparkle. As we reached the front desk, I noticed her attention was focused on a computer screen that was stuck to the side. After a few seconds, she caught sight of us out of the corner of her eye. Because she quickly turned around faced us. And thin in a very business tone of voice asked.
“Hello, is there anything I can do for you two?” The women’s who name tag read “Ronda” asked us.
“Yes, my son here,” She nodded toward me with a big smile. “Has entered into the Womenless Beauty Pageant, that being held here in an hour and a half. I was hoping you might have a dressingroom, or a spare room we can use.” She said in a very professional and business tone of voice.
Ronda smiled and pointed down the hallway. “We have a few spare rooms set aside. May I please have your first and last name young man.” She said in a gentle tone of voice.
“Daisy. Bell.” I said
The women smiled and reached down into her drawer and pulled out a set of room keys. She handed to the keys to me and in a very professional tone of voice said.
“Okay Ms. Bell, your room is A104. If you go down this hallway and take a left it should the fourth one to your right. Good luck in the pageant.” She said and with that, we were off. Despite being an hour and a half early, the hallway was already filled with people. News crews from the two big TV stations in Mississippi. Linda Parker from JTV and Melody Thompson from WTV were both conducting interviews with those who were already dressed. They were getting there golden fifteen minutes of fame if you will.
“Once you’re dressed. I’ll make sure one of those lovely ladies make time for you too. You're going to get your fifteen minutes of fame too.” She said winking as she reached down and picked the keys out of my hand. She smiled and guided me down the hallway. We soon were standing before a simple, plain door. A big brass “A” followed by the numbers “104” had been nailed into the center of the door. Mom key in hand pushed the door open and stepped in. She pulled me in a few seconds in and then she quickly closed the door
Once the door was closed, she placed the make-up kit and carry case of styling tools down upon the floor. I felt a deep blush coloring my cheeks, as I placed the hanger the dress was hanging from on a hanger mounted on the wall. Mom then reached over and wheeled a chair out and patted it. “Okay, hon we gotta act quick. Now, I’m going to warn you. These people like to play mind tricks with you, they're going to use all kind of tactics to throw you off your game. You gotta keep focused though.” She said as she plugged in a curling iron and started to lay out the varies cosmetics contained in her make-up kit.
“Hey,” She said smiling as she turned toward me and smiled. “I’m glad you're doing this, I always wanted like a second daughter to do girly-girl things with like pageants and stuff. Don’t get me wrong, like I love Sue to death, cause she totally a warrior princess and all. But, she’ll never do something like this.”
I blushed and peered down the floor. I slowly lifted my head up and started to look around, the room was your average room. Small, square with four gray walls a few chairs and table. Soon, I found myself looking once more at the dress. A sudden rush of blood colored my cheeks, in a few minutes, I’ll be wearing that gown, and instead of that fact filling me with dread. It filled me with hope and made me wish time would kind of speed up a little.
I remember when I first spotted that gown, mom and I had taken a trip to North Park, the second largest indoor mall in Mississippi. We were flipping through the mark-down prom dresses at Belk’s and having little to no luck finding that perfect gown. Prom-season had just ended and big-chain department stores had knocked the prices on there prom formals down to rock bottom prices. Now was the time to show, when the prices were really, really low.
I remember that day because it was a Monday and the mall, normally filled from one end to the other with shoppers was something of a ghost town. It was around ten o’ clock in the morning and the mall was just coming to life. Many of the boutique’s that lined the walkways were just now opening there doors to those early morning shoppers. The dozen or so eaters that dotted the mall were just getting there oven heated. the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air around the two coffee houses that called the mall home.
And mom and I were hunting for deals. We’ll mom was, I was standing beside her. Holding her purse while she flipped through the racks. Every so often she’ll run across a gown, she’ll then hold the gown up in front of me and nine times out of ten she’ll shake her head and return the gown to its rack.
An hour passed in this manner and I was starting to grow reckless, mom sensing I was growing reckless told me to go wonder around, that she’ll call me if she needed me for something or if she found that perfect gown that would bring home the crown. I nodded and strayed off from her, I had walked maybe a few yards when, sitting there on a table, ready to be marked down I spotted it. A vision from heaven if you will. A dress that seemed to call for me. Taking a deep breath, I walked up to the sells lady and asked her if the dress was for sale. She said yes, I then asked her if she was about to mark it down. She said yes and that, if I waited a few minutes she’ll be more than happy to mark it down for me.
“Daisy? Earth to Daisy?” A voice, a female voice, one that belonged to my mom knocked me out of my daydream. I slowly regained the focus of my eyes and there she stood in front of me. She was standing behind a simple plastic chair. Her of her hands was resting on the back and in the other, she held a curling iron.
“You okay hon? You kind of spaced out for a minute there. Everything okay?” She asked in a tone of maternal affection as she placed the curling iron down on the table.
I nodded my head. Not trusting myself to speak.
“Okay, we’ll the iron’s ready. So go ahead and sit down and we’ll style your hair. Then I’ll do your make-up and then we’ll get you dressed.” She said in a gentle, yet commanding tone of voice.
I took a deep breath and eased my bottom down upon the seat of the chair. My cheeks bloomed with color as I folded my hands in my lap and took a deep breath. Mom started to whistle a little tune as she walked behind me and removed the elastic band that held my hair up in a low ponytail. My hair was quite long for a guy, I’ve been growing it out for a year or so. It now fell just beyond my shoulders blades.
My mom smiled as she started to wrap a few strains of my hair around the hot tube. She held the tube for a few seconds before moving toward another section of hair, she repeated this over and over again till my whole head was covered in tight, bouncy curls. She then spun the chair around and smiled as she peered into my eyes. A small grin formed upon her face as she picked up the tube of lipstick and the make-up brush. She smiled as she removed the brass cup from the tub and twisted the stick of cherry red lipstick out of its casing.
“Pluck your lips together for mommy sweetheart.” She said in a gentle voice.
I plucked my lips together and a few seconds later I could feel the lipstick being applied to my lips. It took mom thirty full seconds to finish the task. She placed the lipstick down and then picked up what appeared to be a pencil and a brush.
“Close your eyes sweetie.” She said.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Time seemed to slow down and the seconds seemed to drag on as I felt mom using the pencil on my eyes and felt the brush being applied to my cheeks. Finally, after what seemed like a new age of the earth, mom gave me the okay to open my eyes.
“Daisy honey.” She said smiling as she brought up a hand-held mirror. “You look wonderful!”
My breath was almost taken away, my mom had transformed my facial features from that of an androgyny tween to a gorgeous, charming young woman. I must also confess, I’ve always been on the effeminate side. For example, while many of my peers loved to wrestle, fight and built castles/forts out of mud and sticks. And then once the castles where completed, they would then lead there armies of plastic, toy soldiers into battle to take the back the castle. I found it odd that the gray colored ones where always the “Germans” or “Nazis” and the green ones were the “Americans” and the yellow ones were the “British.” But I ramble on. I never played or those kind of games, instead I stuck of reading, and training my pokemon army and playing doctor with stuff animals I shared with my sister.
“Honey, now go get changed into that dress of yours.” She said as she gently took me by the hand and helped me stand up. I stood up and moved toward the dress that was hanging from the hook behind the door. Blushing I peeled off my shirt, followed by my undershirt,then I unlaced my sneakers and removed my socks and finally my belt and trousers where removed. Then blushing and taking a deep breath I pushed down my briefs.
My mom collected all my discarded clothing and started to fold them nice and neat. Once the clothing was folded placed in the corner. Mom turned her attention to me again and then smiling softly, she handed me a small box, the box was wrapped in bright pink, pastel wrapping paper.
“Go ahead and remove that wrapping paper.” She said as she turned around. “I’ll be right here if you need some help.” She said smiling.
I blinked and peered down at the wrapping and taking a deep breath, I reached down and removed the wrapping and tossed it into a nearby paper waste basket. Once the paper was removed, I removed the top of the box and there sitting in the bottom of the box was a lacey pink bra and a matching set of lacey panties. I blushed, they kind of matched my dress. I took a deep breath and picked up the panties and slipped them. A deep blush colored my cheeks as I felt them settling around my waistline. I think picked up the bra and slipped it on. Once both were on, I felt another blush blooming in my cheeks.
Mom turned around at that point at smiled as she peered toward me. Grinning she reached into her purse and pulled out two foam pads. She slipped the pads into the cups of the bra and patted them. She then picked up the dress, unzipped the back and slipped it on me. She wasted little time in zipping the back, the dress almost molded to the curves of my body. And with the addition of padding to the chest, the dress really kind of filled out more if you will. Mom nodded her approval and finally, she placed the shoes on the floor. Without giving it a second thought I slipped the shoes on my bare feet and buckled the strap, once both shoes were on, I stood up for one final inspection.
“Daisy, you're going to win this thing.” She said smiling softly as she walked over and wrapped her arms around me. “You look stunning my dear. Now, we need to do a few more things before the rest of the family arrives. First, we need to find one of the reporters and then we need to get you behind the stage. And remember, we're all standing behind you dear. Daddy, Susan, Madeline, Kayla and I.”
I could only nod my head.
he minute I stepped into the hallway, I found myself surrounded by boys who like me had been drafted, volunteered or had been volunteered into dawning a dress for charity. Most of them tried to pass and most did pass. Many of them where being interviewed by the varies reports that where covering the event. Lana Lightcap of WBT had just finished interviewing somebody when she spotted me. She smiled and motioned for the cameraman to follow her as she approached me.
“Hey, sweetie, do you have a few minutes to spare?” She said smiling toward me. She paused and then in a friendly tone of voice she added. “And I love the gown.”
I blushed and smiled. Rolling the mental dice, I decided to go with it. I mean, I had signed up for this event to have fun. And being interviewed seemed like it would be fun enough. So pushing a few strains of my golden hair back and tucking it behind my ear I nodded my head and said. “Sure.”
“Cool, so let's start with your name.” She said as she placed her microphone in front of me.
“Daisy Bell,” I said smiling.
“Cool, so Ms. Bell, could you please tell us a little about you.” She said holding the microphone out in front of me again.
“Sure, I’m like twelve, going on thirteen. I attend St. Katherine’s Episcopal Academy.” I said naming the basic information. Trusting that she’ll poke or prod me if she needed more information. But right now, I wanted to start with the bare minimum. You know, name, rank and social.
“Do you have any hobbies, and why did you decide to enter the pageant?” Lana said as she placed the microphone in front of me again.
“I like reading Manga, Light Novels and watching Anime,” I said into the microphone, chiefly aware that my words where being broadcast into televisions scattered through all of the fifty-two counties of Mississippi. “I also belong to the Anime Club, and I joined because I wanted to help raise money for the Delta. I have family in Benton, and we’ll the flood water is really putting the squeeze on them right now. I mean the whole town of Benton is really feeling the squeeze. With most of the surrounding farmland sitting under seven foot of water.”
Lana nodded her head and smiled.
“Alright, Ms. Bell. We wish you luck and we hope you take home the crown.” And with that Lana and her cameraman moved onto somebody else. As I watched them go, I took a deep breath and tried to control my racing heart. And I mean racing like I could hear it thumping and echoing deep in my chest.
“Hey Dork!” A voice behind me called out. I quickly turned around and there in the hallway stood a collection of people, a teenage girl with sandy brown hair and blue eyes stood there dressed in a simple button-down white blouse and a black pleated skirt. Standing beside her was a girl with brown hair and pink eyes, she wore a floral print sundress. Standing behind them was a woman who appeared to be in her early twenties. She was dressed in a simple blouse and jeans and standing to the side was a tall man who wore a charcoal gray suit.
“OMG!” The teenage girl with sandy brown hair cried out as she rushed toward me and threw her arms around me and pulled me close to her chest. “DAISY! LIKE YOU CLEANED UP, AND YOUR LIKE TOTALLY ADORABLE.” Her shrill voice echoed down the hallway. Causing the heads of a dozen or so people to turn and face us.
“I gotta say,” The teen with the pink eyes said. “When you dress up, you dress up little sister.” She said in a teasing tone of voice as she started to circle me in a manner that reminded me of a lioness circling around her pray before she moved in for the kill. “Make-up looks spot on, dress suits you. Nice blooming chest, the only problem I see are those shoes.” She said pointing down at the heels. “Like, I can understand wanting to wear some really high heels, cause high heels are sexy.” She paused and folded her arms under her chest and lowered her head. “But like, the way you walk in them. And I’ve seen you trying to walk in them, kind of reminds me of a fawn learning to walk. That cute and all, but that’s something the others will use to like shake you up. They're going to get catty with you. So, don’t be afraid to get catty back.”
I nodded my head.
“Daisy, don’t listen to Susan too much, for what it's worth, I think you're doing something amazing. Your mom and dad welcoming me and Kayla into your home without a second thought, you and Sue treating us like family. And now you're doing this silly pageant to help raise money to provide relief from the flood.” The older teen said as she hugged me tighter.
“Don’t be silly Madeline,” I said as I pulled my face away from Madeline’s chest. “Your family girl,” I said smiling softly.
Madeline smiled and released me front the hug. Her older sister Kayla then approached me and smiled as she reached down and wrapped her arms around and likewise pulled into a rib-crushing hug. She cradled me there between her breast as she wrapped her arms around me.
“Daisy, no matter what happens. I want you to know, I think you're amazing. So many people have lost everything. And it's going to be a while before we can even think about returning. This season’s crop is ruined and most of the seedlings I’m sure where been washed away when Deer Creek jumped her bank. But none of that matters, we’ve been blessed to have you guys take us in. And I’m sure the money raised from this little thing will really bless people who're livelihood been stolen from them by this flood. And I’m sure you're going to be blessed for helping them.”
“Honey,” The man said as he walked up to me and placed his strong hands upon my shoulder. “I’m very proud of you. I think once we're done here, a little treat would be in order. How about this, once this little show is over. I take everybody over to Kyoto’s Japanese Steak House, would that suit everybody?” He said smiling as he peered down at me.
“Steak sounds good to me!” Cried Madeline as she dropped her arms from around my shoulders.
“I like their seafood.” Kayla chimed in.
“The grilled vegetables are to die for, the grilled fish and rice amazing, a pure treat for the taste buds.” Mom chimed in.
“I like everything! The sodas are super tasty!” Susan added in.
I said nothing and just looked down. My dad took a deep breath and walked over to me and folded his arms around me and pulled me into a hug. It was a tight hug, he pulled me close to his chest and held me there for a good three minutes. Finally, he pulled me away from a little and his face was looking down at mine, and then in a loving voice, filled with the tenderness he said.
“We’ll talk later. But I would love it if you could wear the dress your wearing now. And no matter what happens, no matter if you win or lose. You’ll always be my child and I’ll always be proud of you. No matter what.” With that, he bent down and kissed my forehead.
I blushed and smiled at the kiss. My mother appeared again on the scene, she smiled at me and nodded her head once more in approval. But it was my father’s approval I sought more than my mothers. My Father was a lawyer, and a former commissioned officer in the army. He attended St. Katherine’s Episcopal Academy, the same school my sister and I attend, he graduated valedictorian and from there went on to attend that fable school of Episcopal southern gently Sewanee, his brother younger brother followed a year later and was later ordained to the priesthood in the Episcopal Church, he is the current rector of St. Mary’s Episcopal Church, a medium size Anglo-Catholic parish located in Benton, some sixty miles west of Vicksburg. But returning to my father, once he finished at Sewanee he then traveled up north to receive his law degree from Harvard. He then returned home to his native city of Vicksburg and opened up a law firm.
What I’m driving at is this, my father was what I wished to be, A well-educated man, respected in both the community and in the church, and one who had power and connections. The Bell’s have always been a mysteries kind of family. Our roots run deep and our family tree often overlaps other family trees of sizable power and wealth. From a very young age, I’ve always carried the cross that one day, I will take my father's place and lead this powerful family. A task I feel ill-suited for.
“Hey, Daisy,” I felt somebody touching my shoulder. They were rocking me back and forth, that gentle rocking knocked me out of my pondering. I blinked and there standing before me was my cousin Madeline, who was staying with us. Madeline came from Benton, she and her sister had moved in with us a week or so ago. Both she and her older sister Kayla were among the thousands of refugees escaping the rising flood waters.
“Its almost time girl!” She said smiling toward me.
“She right honey, the time has kind of slipped up on us.” My mom said as she reached down and took me by the hand. “Come on, we need to get you signed in.” And with that, she started to guide me down the hallway. Feeling poetic, I looked over my shoulder and noticed my family, Dad, Sue, Madeline and Kayla all standing together. Waving me off. I felt like a soldier going into battle. Only nobody had mentioned coming home carrying my shield or upon it. I suppose that was for the best.
Once I was signed in, mom bent down and gave me a kiss on my cheeks, and then she departed. Leaving me along. The air was filled with nervous chatter. Being true to my nature, I slowly backed myself into the nearest corner I could find and cast my eyes toward the gathering crowds. Now, I understand that popular media has painted the picture of events being something akin to mental fencing, with each person propping the others with catty remarks and teasing insults. The tactic favored the most seemed to display some measure of kindness or compassion before doing a complete turn around and slapping somebody upside the head with a backhanded comment. Now, I do consider myself having some pretty thick skin.
I mean, I'm a seasoned veteran of a thousand flame-wars, having endured the perils of the internet since I was old enough to sit behind a keyboard. Great, now “Veteran of the Psychic Wars” Is playing on loop in my head now. Never question the profound wisdom of BOC ( Blue Oyster Cult) but this, this battlefield was different than the ones I've seen in my time. Not only where the formal dress clad boys going at each other's throats, the judges, most of whom where seniors from St. Katherine's Episcopal School where getting in on the fun as well.
“Oh.” One of the girls said as she spotted me, she was wearing her formal school uniform, a blue pleated skirt, a white blouse with a blue neckerchief draped around the collar, white stockings and black faux leather dress shoes. Pinned to her left breast pocket was a silver oval shape badge engraved in the center of the badge were two letters a capital “H” followed by a capital “G”. Okay before I go on, I think I should say something regarding the uniforms of St. Katherine's, there kind of like those found in the Japanese public school system. The girls wear an outfit that consistent of a white blouse, a blue neckerchief that is normally draped around the collar of the blouse, white stockings and black faux leather shoes. Boys wear dark blue trousers, a white shirt, and over the shirt a dark blue, stiff as a board dress jacket with a stiff, high collar and big brass buttons.
“Oh man, I had no idea that Sue had a little sister.” She said moving toward me, as she peered down at me, I could feel her eyes peering into my soul. “Don't you look cute, got those pink sparkling eyes like your big sister, some tasteful make-up and a cute new haircut.” She said shifting her eyes from the top of my head down to my feet and back up again. “I bet the some lucky boy will be having some fun with you tonight. Your not fooling me, I bet under that little princess look, is nothing more than a little slut waiting spread her wings and take off.” She said smirking as she walked.
I blinked and blinked again as I peered toward her, I felt stunned and shocked. From the shadows I heard a chores of giggles escape into the air. And then into the light stepped another girl. She was wearing a cute half sleeve pink dress instead of her uniform. “Oh man, that was totally so harsh.” She said giggling again. She then turned and like the girl before started to size me up.
“But I gotta hand it to you, your the most passing of the lot. So what's your name sweetie?” She said in an overly fake southern accent that makes my skin crawl. Each word that rolled from the tip of her tongue seemed to drip hot acid.
“Daisy,” I said without thinking. “Daisy Isabella Bell.” When choosing my “Girls” name, I had gone with 'Daisy' as the first name, since it was named, my dad's mother had been given. Mom had decided to let me use her first name as my middle and of course the family name was 'Bell'.
Oh that sounds cute, has something of a high class ring to it. And the more I think about it, the more it sounds like a name from a story book, like the name of a Disney princess or something. Short of has an old southern ruling class ring to it. It echoes that if you will.” She then smiled and then she started to move a little closer, lifting her top lip up a little to show her teeth she then leaned in and whispered.
“Okay, listen here princess. Because I'm only going to say this once, so open those big ears and listen good, because I hate having to repeat myself. This right here is no story book, there is no prince charming for you to charm, you might think your going to fool us with that little outfit of yours. But really, your just making yourself look like a pretty little bitch. You think you can waltz in here and throw around your last name and expect us to fall down and kiss the ground you walk on. If so, you got another thing coming sister.” She then reached down and picked up one of the straps of my gown, she then dropped it with a clear look of disgust.
“Damn girl, the Bell's are supposed to be rolling in the dough, and you show up wearing a gown that looks like it came straight from the racks of the local charity shop. Man it even reeks of mothballs. Maybe mommy and daddy are trying to pawn you off to one of the newer, wealthier families, maybe that why they entered you into this little contest, there trying to show off there slutty daughter, cause there oldest is nothing but a dirty tomboy.” She barked a cruel laugh. “Anyway best of luck, I think your going to need it.”
As I watched her walk off, I felt my blood starting to come to a boil in my veins, it seemed I had entered into a hidden world, a world I knew only in passing. In this world, women ruled and they ruled using words, words that stung like wasps or hornets. There words where sharper than swords and they used those words to cut deep into the flesh of their enemies. These sword did not leave scars in the flesh, no they shattered pride into a million and one pieces and left unseen scars on the soul. This was not a battlefield, this was a mental chessboard. And right now, they had me pinned down.
Feeling low in the saddle, I started to wish the ground would open up and swallow me, I was new to these kind of mind games, and my legs where starting to shake, and the corner of my eyes where starting to become moist. The moisture threaten to become tears and those tears threaten to spill over, and just when I thought they would. I felt a warm pair of arms fold over me, a second later, I felt myself being pulled into a bone crushing hug.
“Hey, princess.”A voice said to my side. “Its okay, you got this.” The voice belonged to a female. We'll a female cousin call Linda, Linda Perry was her name. Her mother had been some kin to my dad, either through the main branch of the family or one of the cadet branches. I could never keep the tree straight. It's safe to say that Grandmother Bell and Grandfather Bell had produced a brood of children, and those children were now in the process of producing a healthy crop of grandsons and granddaughters. I often joked it would take a dozen or so well trained scholars, a dozen years to make sense of the tangled web our family tree was quickly becoming. But it made for fun family reunions and holidays.
Anyway, returning to Linda, Linda had been born and raised in Benton. She had the name of being something of a bully in her hometown. But since coming to live with us, she had slowly started to turn over a new leaf. I'll go as far as to say this, I think she has taken to the role of being a big sister like a duck takes to water. She does seem to have quite a history with my other cousin Madeline, the air grows icy cold when there together. You can almost cut the tension with a butter knife.
“I heard those remarks, you gotta let it roll off your back okay? Girls love to play mind games with each other. Boys, okay boys will use their fist okay, like say you got a problem with another boy, you can ask him to step outside and throw down with him. We've romanticized it, hell in the south we love nothing more than a good story about a shrimp, no offense, knocking out the big bull-headed bully, double points if the bully happens to be one the dreaded 'Yankee's. But that in the boy's world. Girls, Girls are not supposed to fight, its not 'Lady' like if you will. So instead of using our fist, we gotta use our words. And I know words sting like hell. But listen, you gotta hold your head up high, I know you want to cry, but you can't. If you start to cry, your make-up will run and you'll go from looking like a princess to looking like a clown, and then every one will join in on the teasing. Its like, sharks smelling blood, they thrive on it.” She said hugging me tighter. “So keep it together and bring home that crown! Don't do it for Benton, do it for yourself! Be the best pretty boy you can be!”
“Five minutes ladies!” Called one the women. “Five minutes till we start! I'll like all guest and supports to please leave the backstage area now! Five minutes and counting.”
I wanted to say something, but I could not find the words.
Linda did though, she reached down and kissed my forehead. “Good luck baby girl.” And with that she was gone. Leaving me once more along, along to face a hostel crowd.
What happened when Linda left me? I don't know. I remember taking a deep breath and closing my eyes. I knew I was alone and I was facing a hostile crowd. The minutes turned to hours and slowly I started to sweat. The girl's running the thing had no remorse or empathy. I was treated like a number. One by one the girls in charge dressed us down, most boys shrugged it off. Most of them had been drafted into wearing a frilly gown and three inch heels. And once they completed their walk across the stage, many left.
But me, I had to stay. And since I was the youngest, I would be the last one to walk across the stage. The minutes seemed dragged on like hours. A panel of judges, most seniors from St. Katherine's Episcopal Academy sat in the front and they grilled the ones walking across the stage. I mean they grilled them and sometimes tore them to shreds. The harder they tore into the poor boys on stage, the more the crowd behind them laughed, hooted and cat-called. Some even whistled and a bunch of boys in the back balcony tried to mimic the rebel yell.
I felt like I was walking on eggshells when one of the staffers walked up to and in a cold, commanding tone of voice said.
“Daisy Isabella Bell.” She said tapping her wooden clipboard. “Your next. I need you to please move your pretty little self from the shadows and get into position by curtain.” She paused. “And before you ask, no, we're not going to drop a bucket filled with pig’s blood on you from a hidden bucket on the catwalk. A bunch of dumb asses have been asking that question all night. Trust me, if we were going to dumb something on you guys, I'll pick something more vial than pig blood.” She said as she walked off.
I blinked and blinked again. It seemed somebody had a twig up her bottom. On second thought maybe it was more than a twig, maybe it was a whole damn forest. Taking a deep breath though I moved toward the edge of the curtain and then I took a deep breath. Somebody else was on stage, and right now the panel of judges were grilling him hard, heck they were picking him apart bit by bit.
I remember catching one of the questions.
“Why did you volunteer for this.. this pageant?” Was the question posed by one of the girls. Who waited for an answer. The stuttering boy responded. “To raise money?” I remember the girl closed her eyes, sighed and leaned back in her chair and started to rub her forehead. That was enough to get the crowd laughing and jeering and hooting. I think the boy wished the ground would open up and swallow him whole. I remember feeling very sorry for the boy.
“That all, trust me, joining the circus and donating your wages to the flood relief would raise a heck more money than what you're doing. Anyway five out of ten.” She said finally, and the other ten judges followed suit awarding the boy fifty points. You could tell he was crestfallen because the way he moved when they shooed him away from the center of the stage. I would never forget the look of his eyes, hollow eyes. Ones void of life, ones that had the sparkle gone out of them.
“Its your turn.” He paused and looked dead at me. And the look of his eyes may me pull back. They were blank, totally blank and gazed over. It reminded me of fish that had just been pulled from the water and tossed on the bank. It chilled my blood. He looked like somebody that had been raked over hot coals.
“How bad is it?” I asked swallowing hard.
“They're going to rake you over hot coals.” He said, smiling a little. “You know, most of the relief money is coming from people who brought tickets. They brought those tickets to laugh at boys in dresses. That panel of judges is there to get a response from the crowd. Their going to tear you up.” I then noticed he was crying. And then he vanished.
“We'll.” The spokesman said on the center of the stage. “That was something!” He said, forcing a laugh. “Anyway, please put your hands together for our next lovely contestant, she the belle of high southern society, the second daughter of those wonderful crazy Bells. Please put your hands together and welcome to the stage, Miss. Daisy Isabella Bell!” He shouted in a loud commanding tone of voice.
At that moment, all of the bedlam broke out. The crowd went wild. I went to move and I felt my knees buckle under the weight of my thin one hundred and ten frame. I felt my chest starting to get tight. I clutched the velvet curtain in my trembling hand and took a deep breath.
“That you princess.” A voice from behind me said, It was the same girl from before the one who had made the off humored joke about dropping a bucket of pig blood on me. “Go on, their waiting for you.”
I looked over my shoulder and paused. Then I felt myself getting pushed. And before I could catch myself I was stumbling out onto the stage. The spotlight shone brightly on me and I just blinked. I must have looked quite comical standing there, peering out into the three hundred or so odd faces. A sea of faces.
And then I lost it, for a moment I just stood there peering out at that sea of faces. My mind went blank and I felt myself starting to panic. I looked down and noticed the panel of judges looking up at me, all ten of them drumming their fingers on the wooden box. After a painful moment, a few of them just rolled their eyes and pulled out their phones. No doubt they started texting or checking their social feeds.
“So.” One of them finally after three more minutes had ticked on by. “Are you done or something?” She said looking down at her phone. “Because you've wasted like four minutes just standing there. If you're just going to stand there and look pretty, you can just move on backstage, because we don't want you wasting our time, and your time too.”
“Savage.” A girl next to her said smirking. “You can really burn somebody.” She then turned her attention toward me, her baby blue eyes seemed to twinkle and a very feral smile started to form upon her face. I felt my blood run cold the moment our eyes connected.
“So, sweetie. Before we boo you off stage.” She said in an over the top southern accent. “You mind telling us a little about yourself. Starting with your name, then maybe following up with a little about what you like. Then tell us a little why you decided to enter into this little thing here. And finally, what you hope to do with the rest of your life.”
I swallowed hard.
“Okay my name is Daisy Isabella Bell.” I paused, “I attend St. Katherine's Episcopal Academy, I'm the girly-girl counterbalance to my tomboy big sister whom I just love and adore.” I then paused again. The crowd started to laugh a little and even the judges cracked a small smile. I felt the tide of battle starting to turn in my favor. Linda was right, I could bring home the crown. I just needed to get them to eat from the palm of my hand.
“That not to say I'm not something of a tomboy myself.” I said hitting my stride. “I play soccer with the 'Vicksburg Belle's' since you know. St. Katherine's disbanded their soccer team.” A chuckle ran through the crowd and a few boos. Nobody in my school really wanted to remember that failed venture that lasted only a season. Though much to my surprise one of the judges, a brunette uncapped her marker and wrote a big “14” on her scorecard and held it up. It seemed the judges were allowed an extra four bonus points to reward if they saw fit.
“Of course Grace is going to give her a fourteen.” One of the girls said with a roll of her eyes. That same girl, a blonde with blue eyes also wrote down “14” on her scorecard and held it up. I blinked and blinked again. I was only a few minutes into my counter attack and I had already scored twenty eight points. That was something..
“Also. I'm in anime. I love to cosplay.” I added before I paused again to collect my thoughts. “I also entered into this pageant to help raise money, because I have family being affected by the flood. My cousins, Kayla Brewer, Madeline Brewer and her girlfriend Heather Ford, were forced to leave their homes because of the rising waters. I wanted to help them.. not only did I volunteer to shack sandbags to build a make-shift levee around their house to keep out the rising water. But I helped to move what we could.”
“I just want to raise as much money as possible to help them. And all the family members who are trapped in Benton. I daily pray the Rosary for them.. and their daily prayers to them at the daily Mass.”
Once more a hushed silence had fallen over the room. I expect many of the people were hoping I'll say something funny or fumble through a poorly written speech. Instead, I surprised them I think. I had spoken from the heart and that had stunned them into silence.
“So.” Another girl said. “So what are you going to do with the prize money, if by chance you win and are awarded the title of 'Ms. Jr. Vicksburg'?” Another girl asked.
I did not miss a beat and responded quickly with.
“I would take my family out to eat.” I said smiling. “Including Madeline, Kayla and Heather because they are staying with us. And after all the trauma they've been through. I think they deserve something nice. I mean having to leave your home because of all you have, and not being sure that it would be there when you return. It must be taking a really bad emotional toil on them.”
Another hushed silence fell over the room.
“Okay..” The girl said as she reached down and picked up a marker. “I'm going to go ahead and give you a fourteen.” She said holding up her scorecard. The girl beside her card held up her car. It was ten, and the girl beside her held her card. It was another fourteen, and the girl sitting beside her, who was dappling her eyes with a tissue, held up her card. It was another jaw dropping fourteen. The girl beside her, whom up to this point had only awarded a seven held up a nine. The girl beside her, who had again up to this point rewarded everybody with a big fat zero surprised and shocked us all by holding up a fourteen. She even gave me the thumbs up. And I think caving into peer-pressure the last girls gave me a solid fourteen each.
My mind started to race as I did the mental math, one hundred thirty one points! An amazing total, I had blown the rest of the boys out of the water. It felt I had just scored the winning touchdown, or scored a mind blowing home run, you know the ones you see in the movies, the one where the ball flies over the old cyclone fence that rings the old dirt field and vanishes into the setting sky in a twinkle? Yes it was that kind of feeling.
“Wow.” The girl who had been doing most of the speaking said. “I can't believe it, you scored a total of one hundred thirty one points! And since you're the last one, that means you're the winner.” She said smiling. “So congratulations! On being crowned the very first 'Ms. Jr. Vicksburg'!” She shouted as she started clapping her hands together.
At that moment the whole crowd rose to their feet and started to clap and whistle. It was a bedlam of noise and above the noise and confusion I could hear my own family starting to celebrate. Loudest of them all was my oldest sister, Susan. Who's voice carried over the crowd like a bull horn.
“That my sister!” She shouted. “Go Daisy!” She shouted again. “You rock them girl!” She added again. Then I heard Kayla adding in, her country swag cut through the noise like a hot knife through a stick of warm butter. “You go sweetie! Knew you had it in you!” Then Heather's refined southern voice. “Congratulations Ms. Bell! I'll have to have you at the House Party before long!”
And that my story and I'm sticking with it. What happens next? Nothing much, I was given a crown and a sash, I took a lot of pictures, dad took us out to eat. Though something odd did happen, Madeline kept giving me this look through dinner and late into that night. It was like she was expecting me to say something. Like she was expecting at any moment me to make some big announcement.
But a little after midnight when I was about to turn in, I mean we partied hard into the night, and it was clear everybody had enjoyed themselves a little too much and it was well into the wee hours of the morning when we came stumbling, Sue, Kayla and Heather and Linda crashed the moment we got in. Mom and Dad were.. taking their flirting to the next level and had retreated to the bedroom to do.. nope, I'm not going to think about that.
Anyway after I had removed the gown, hung it up, showered and changed into my night clothing, Madeline appeared in the doorway of my bedroom. She propped herself up against the door frame and gave me a small smile. I blinked, she was giving me a strange look.
“So kiddo, Is Daisy here to stay or was this a once in a lifetime thing?” She asked.
I could only shrug my shoulders.
“Fair, just wanted you to know, I enjoyed having her around. And she can come out anytime she wants.” She then walked up to me and hugged me, “And if you're both. Then I would love both. Just wanted to say I support you, in whatever you decided.” And with that Madeline ruffled my hair and headed off to bed.
Leaving me with a lot to think about.
The End.