It all started when I was 12. You see I was quite short for my age and very skinny, with long scruffy brown hair. I lived in a cul-de-sac in the near a park in the town of Mount Horeb, WI and in this cul-de-sac lived the only people in the world that I could call friends. Across the street lived Sophie (13) and her brother Timmathy(9), whilst right next-door lived Kaitlyn (14) and her little sister Harpher (8).

Now to my memory, it was a warm summers day, the skies were clear and blue when I decided to head outside. We were a very close bunch of neighbours back then, we would all come into the cul-de-sac and play together, and it was our own little playground.

Happy days. 

The first thing I noticed when I stepped outside was a pink fold-up table sitting on Sophie’s (from this point on will be referred to as Soph) front garden, Soph and Kaitlyn were sitting opposite of each other at the table, which was filled with a ton of cosmetics. Kaitlyn was the oldest of the kids in the cul-de-sac, and had quickly matured into an attractive teenage girl. She had long and wavy dark blonde hair, with brunette highlights. I didn’t know much about makeup but it looked like she only needed to use a little bit, from across the street all I could notice was her lips were all glossy. 

Soph was a year younger than Kaitlyn at 13 years old, I will admit that she was not as attractive as her BFF Kaitlyn, with plain brunette hair and glasses, but her lips were painted a bright red. She was trying to become more feminine and it looked like Kaitlyn was helping her.

I realised, being the youngest of the kids outside today, that going over there would probably be a mistake. I was crazy paranoid back then, especially around girls, as a result of my school years. On many occasions girls would try and give me makeovers in the school hallways, I preferred death to walking around school wearing any sort of makeup. I had to hide in the library as much as possible to convince my brain that I was safe from the mean girls and their mascara.

Kaitlyn and Soph were two of my best friends in the whole world and I love playing in the cul-de-sac with them. But with such a display of femininity and girly-ness going on over there, I had to get away. If only Kaitlyn hadn’t noticed me first.

She waved at me and called for me to come over, I couldn’t pretend I didn’t notice them, as I gave both girls a solid 5 seconds of eye contact. For the sake of our friendship I began to slowly walk towards them, perhaps if they looked away I could jump into a bush and they’d forget about me, but they kept their eyes on me.

The fear running through my body kept my steps as slow as possible, to them it must have seemed like an age. I smiled shyly at them, my hands in my pockets, Kaitlyn stood up and quickly walked to me in 1/5 of the time it took for me to get halfway across the street. 

“Come on, take a seat, we’re just talking” she linked her arm with mine and dragged me along to the pink table. I was forcibly sat down on the seats connected to the fold-up table, Kaitlyn sat back down beside me and gave me a long winded side-hug. When the hug was over, she kept her arm around my shoulders to keep me close, so I could not get away. 

“What are you guys doing with all this stuff?” I asked in a low voice, looking at the all the different jars, tubs, tubes, boxes, bags and cans. I imagined placing all of my toy soldiers on the table, making them use cans of hair spray as cover. 

“This stuff makes us pretty, you wouldn’t know about it” Sophie blurted out, making me feel even more clueless in the situation.

“Soph and I were just talking about what lip gloss we should use” added Kaitlyn
“Any ideas?” 

“I wouldn’t know, obviously” I said with a little smirk on my face, even though I was looking at the table. Sophie nodded in agreement. 

“Don’t you want to know who it’s for?” they both said in unison, I looked up at them both and saw them grin at each other.

“Ok you got me who’s it for?” I asked nervously, they gave each other another look and then smiled at me.

“You” they said excitedly in unison, before I could react Kaitlyn had tightened her arm around my shoulder and grabbed a squeezy tube of lip-gloss, pink and sparkly like she had on her lips. I wriggled and struggled to escape Kaitlyn’s grasp but every move I made seemed to tighten her grip on me. She popped the cap off the tube of lip-gloss using her thumb, and then raised the tube to my face. 

Thing seemed to go into slow motion, I saw Sophie giggling like a maniac in the corner of my eye, my head had turned away from the girls to make it harder for them to get me. Kaitlyn’s arm around my shoulders prevented me from raising my arms, and any hope of overpowering her was lost when she was born three years before me, I could only hope for a miracle now. 

Kaitlyn called for Sophie to turn my head, and in seconds she was behind me with her hands forcefully trying to turn my head to face Kaitlyn. The lip-gloss was getting closer and closer, and now my head was held in place. I was looking Kaitlyn right in the eyes, she had an evil grin spread across her face, and she seemed on the edge of laughter. This was slowly turning into an epic battle of strength, which I was losing. The two girls were much more developed muscle wise, among other things. I was being easily overpowered. 

The lip-gloss was an inch from my lips, I felt Kaitlyn’s grip around my shoulders loosen slightly. She must have been concentrating so much on getting my lips that she forgot about holding me in place. I realised this was my only chance to get away, so I took it. I had to be smart about it. I paused for a moment to make them think I was going to stop struggling; they took the bait and their grips loosened. 

Here I go, this is my chance. 

A blast of energy surged through my body, the adrenaline was pumping, I jerked my head forward and felt Sophie’s hands disappear, but also felt the tube of lip-gloss slide across my cheek. Kaitlyn’s grip was at it’s weakest so far, so I slid down and under the table and leaped out the other side.

I heard the two girls shouting at each other in unison “You let him get away!” but I didn’t care. For the next few minutes I completely forgot that Sophie and Kaitlyn were two of my best friends, I made them chase me through bushes, up and down trees, around houses, over fences and even under cars. Soon I had lost them and quickly bolted for my own garage, they wouldn’t follow me in there. It was a mini junk yard in my garage, bikes, toys, odd bits of wood, the freezer, the boiler and a dangerously placed pair of roller skates would prevent them from getting in there. But I knew my way around. I jumped over the roller skates and hid behind a thick fence made of stacked up bicycles. They stayed away for the next hour or so before I decided it was safe. I snuck out of the garage and hid inside my house for the rest of the day. 

Now that was the vague memory I had, but recently the thought came back to my head and I began to wonder. What could have happened if I never escaped them?
This is a highly fantasised version of what could have happened if Kaitlyn and Sophie kept me in place and painted my lips in a light pink and sparkly lip-gloss. 

- Part 1

I leaped out the other side of the table and ran for my life, I heard the girls shouting at each other behind me in unison “You let him get away!” I ran for the nearest hiding place I could find, Kaitlyn’s house. I knew her mom was probably away at work at this time of day, so the house would be empty. 

I zoomed down the side of the house and into their back garden, the door to their conservatory was hanging open, so I quietly slid into the house and hid behind the sofa. 

It took me a while to realise that I was now stuck in Kaitlyn’s house, I heard her closing the gate to the back garden, and her mom always kept the front door locked during the day. Kaitlyn and her mom were the only ones who had the key! 

I was now trapped, and Kaitlyn was stalking around the house looking for me. She could do anything to me now, since I was technically trespassing. 

When I began to think about what she might do to me, I became frozen with fear. She might pull off all my clothes and push me outside, or lock me in her sister’s room and tell her mom I’m a pervert! 

I didn’t think to move and find a new hiding place, I was stuck in my own mind thinking of my fate. Kaitlyn had already snuck up behind me and had me on my back in seconds. 

The lip-gloss was primed and ready, she had one hand clamped onto my chin to hold me still. 

“It’s not so bad, stop being a baby” she said with an evil smirk on her face. 

I closed my eyes and clenched my fists as she gently slid the lip-gloss over my lips, then used her thumb and forefinger to stretch my lips into a forced smile. 

“There, I told you it’s not so bad”

“I’m a boy!” I shouted at her. “You look more like a girl” she replied coolly.

I had to admit, being only 12 and having long scruffy brown hair, she was right.

Kaitlyn smiled playfully and pulled me up to my feet with one hand, god she was strong. I knew she was just playing games, she didn’t do this because she hated me, I imagined she was just in the mood for some friendly humiliation. 

I remembered this girl was one of my best friends, so I returned her smile with a shy one of my own, even if it was directed at the floor. She lifted my chin up with her thumb and jokily said, “You look pretty”.

I grunted. 

We had about 2 hours before Kaitlyn’s mother got home, so we decided to go up to her room and watch TV. We must have been having so much fun that I forgot about the bubblegum taste on my lips. 

“Kaitlyn, how do I take this off?” I asked when the advertisement break came on. 
“It doesn’t come off” she replied quickly without looking away from the TV. 

Now I didn’t mind watching Girl Meets World in a girl’s room with a girl, but I was not going to wear lip-gloss forever, I had to put my foot down now. 

“I’m serious, how do I take this off!” I wanted to shout but for the sake of all the fun we were having, I only raised my voice slightly. But before Kaitlyn could reply, we heard the front door unlocking, and the voice of Kaitlyn’s mum announcing she was home. 

Kaitlyn didn’t talk, she just went into overdrive as she sprinted about the room gathering supplies. 

“Your mother can’t see me like this! She’ll tell my parents and I’ll never be able to go outside again!” I whispered at her in a nervous and hysterical tone. 

“No she can’t, boy’s aren’t allowed in my room!” she squeaked at me in the same tone. 

I decided what I would do immediately, I ran for Kaitlyn’s closet. My thinking was this was a girl’s closet, so there will be tons and tons of clothes to hide behind.

Kaitlyn was still rushing around grabbing things, whilst simultaneously cleaning up the room and somehow managing to grab the back of my shirt just as I was about to hide in the closet. 

When my momentum was gone, she turned me around by the shoulders and commanded me to put a pink flowery dress on which she held in front of me. I put my foot down again and declared sternly that I would never ever wear a dress, but Kirsty was already pulling the dress on over my head and pulling my arms through the sleeves.

This was not going through my head when I was thinking of things Kaitlyn might do to me. 

By now I understood what Kaitlyn was trying to do, she wanted her mother to think I was just another girl in the room so she wouldn’t get into trouble. I thought the pink dress was enough and she thought so too.

She led me over to the closet that had a mirror on the front of the door. I studied my reflection closely whilst Kaitlyn stood behind me. She was at least a foot taller than me, but I wasn’t looking at her. In my reflection stood a girl in a pink flowery dress.my now curly brown hair (after I finally caved to her wish of curling my long hair)and glossed pink lips, I looked girly enough to pass as a maybe a 12 year old female version of myself. 

I wouldn’t have to worry about Kaitlyn’s mum, Stephanie, recognizing me, or even Kaitlyn’s sister Harpher. Suzanne was at work most of the day, and only got home when most of us had gone back inside, Harpher and I have never even talked once, she always spent her time playing with Sophie’s brother Timmathy. 

Kaitlyn began brushing my shoulder length hair vigorously until it was devoid of knots and smooth, then gathered it together and tied it into a girly ponytail at the back of my head. She made sure to tie my hair closer to the top of my head, so it was clearly noticeable, but much more painful for me. 

I raised my hand to try and loosen it slightly, but Kaitlyn batted my hand away.

“Don’t, it makes you a more convincing girl” she said in a rushed voice

I pouted and looked down at the ground.

“I need you to smile and be a good girl, Courtney” she continued.

I looked at her in the mirror and gave her a confused look, she gave me a quick look in the mirror and smirked for a millisecond, she was still rushing.

We heard footsteps in the kitchen downstairs.

“Kaitlyn?” her mother shouted.

“I’m busy mom!” she shouted back through the door to her room. 

Kaitlyn placed another pink item, a hair clip with a red plastic flower, on either side of my ponytail to keep any loose hairs in place. 

She then reached for her deodorant since I have no body hair except for what's on my head and sprayed my bare chest for a good few seconds. For a moment all I could smell was a flowery fragrance similar to what Kaitlyn always smelt like. She pulled me over to her vanity desk, right next to her bed and the window. She grabbed a glass bottle of another pink liquid spritzed each of my wrists and my neck. Now the flowery smell was gone and all I could smell was a soft fragrance of coconuts.

Without loosening her grip on my hand we sat down at the end of her bed.

I heard the footsteps of her mother coming up the stairs and so did Kaitlyn, she sprinted over to her desk and gathered a bunch of small colored bottles and a small table, the type of table people use when they have breakfast in bed. 

In a matter of seconds, the table was sitting across my legs and covered in all these different bottles of nail polish, Kaitlyn was sitting at the other end of her bed with her legs barely touching my own legs. We were sitting opposite each other with her table of more cosmetics sitting between us. 

Kaitlyn took a few breaths to calm down, then grabbed my left hand and began filing my nails. I had to take a few breaths to relax myself. 

This was the first time I was able to actually study the situation I was in. Back when we were watching TV, all I really focused on was the TV. I didn’t seem to notice the fact I was in a girl’s room with another girl until well, now. 

At this point I think I should say that Kaitlyn is a very girly girl. And her room only helped to reinforce that. I looked at surroundings carefully. The room looked like it hadn’t been redecorated since Kaitlyn was around 6 or 7, the walls were pink, but lined with paintings of bunnies and rainbows at the tops and bottoms of the walls. Her bed was a queen size canopy bed with light pink curtains, the sheets were pink and white, but with white lace around the edges, the pillows too. All her stuffed toys were pilled on the bed behind Kaitlyn, and I’m sure that every single type of animal in the world was in that pile. The carpet was a very fluffy white material, and the furniture, including her vanity table, was all painted a glossy white. The only window in the room was above her vanity table, and looked into the back garden, the curtains were also white and light pink to match her sheets on the bed. All in all, she has a very girly room.

Kaitlyn was busy trying to smooth out my nails when I came back to the present, I looked across the room at the mirror on the closet, I desperately searched for me in the reflection but all I could was two girls doing their nails on Kaitlyn's bed. I honestly felt like I’d fallen into someone else’s life here, but was brought back to reality when Stephanie opened the door. 

If she saw what I could see in the mirror, then we were going to be fine. And I was right. As soon as she entered the room, a wide smile engulfed her face as she spotted me.

“A new friend Kaitlyn darling?” she asked as she gave me another quick smile and began searching for something in her bag. 

“Yeah, Mom this is Courtney, she just moved here” Kaitlyn replied.

Stephanie looked to be in her late thirties, tall and curvy, long brown hair, an everlasting smile and a face that was only just starting to show signs of aging. She was truly beautiful. 

I waved at Stephanie with my free hand and uttered a quiet and shy hello to her.

“Nice to meet you Courtney, I’m glad you met my daughter, she needs another girly girl like herself” she grinned. 

I went red in the face, feeling utterly humiliated by that. 

“Mom, did you get what I asked for?” said Kaitlyn, ignoring her mother’s comment.

Her mother was already walking towards the bed and pulled out a blue package from her handbag. She handed it to Kaitlyn who quickly hid the package behind her.

Stephanie gave me a quick look and asked “Oh Courtney, do you need any? I bought spares.” 

I smiled to distract her whilst I looked at Kaitlyn in the corner of my eye, I’m told I have an infectious smile, so Stephanie would be too distracted to see that her daughter was shaking her head vigorously. 

I took the hint from Kirsty and shyly spoke “Oh no thanks Mrs. Allison, I’m okay for now” 

“Oh please dear call me Mom, all Kaitlyn’s friends do, only the girls though.” She said. 

“You know where to find me if you need these, then” she continued as she pointed at another blue package poking out of her bag, which I guessed were the spares she mentioned. 

I nodded with a little smile. ‘Mom’ leaned over the table to look at what Kirsty was doing with my nails.

“Make sure you paint her nails in the bubblegum pink polish that you have dear, it’ll match her lip gloss and dress dear” she said confidently.

“I know mom, I’ve done this before” Kaitlyn replied, giving her mom an unimpressed look before continuing to file my nails. 

“So am I making dinner for two or three?” She said as she gave both of us looks, clearly she wanted me to stay for dinner, she looked so excited to see a new face. 

One of us had to answer, I would of said no and so would Kaitlyn, but I guess we were just confused as to who was going to say it.

“Three mum, Courtney is staying the night.” Kaitlyn blurted out. Her mother nodded excitedly.

“Dinner is in an hour, make sure your ready by then girls, alright?” She smiled at us both and gave my shoulder another squeeze before she walked out of the room, closing the door behind her. 

“What! I can’t stay here over night and pretend to be a girl! I can’t!” I shouted at Kaitlyn, she just grinned at me.

“You don’t have a chance of walking out of this house dressed as a boy and looking like a boy Kaleb.” She said.

“My mom will see you and she’ll freak out, she’ll be angry with you for being in my bed room and wearing my clothes, she’ll be angry with me letting you in here, and she’ll be angry with both of us for lying to her.” 

“And if you really want to walk out of this house dressed as a girl, go ahead, just know that you’re parents will see you dressed as a girl along with everyone else who might recognise you.” 
“Besides you’re always talking about how your parents don’t care about you, and don’t even notice when you’re gone, I thought you might want to get away from them for a bit” she finished.

Kaitlyn was right, I didn’t have a chance of getting out of the house dressed as a boy. And even if I did manage to sneak out, spending the night with Kaitlyn was much better than spending it in my own house with my parents. I took every chance I got to get away from my mom and dad, they’re always insulting me and making me feel worthless. All I look forward to when I get home is playing with my neighbours. 

“I’m sorry, for shouting at you, you’re right as always.” I said dejectedly as I slid out of the bed and stood up. 

Kaitlyn smiled up at me and nodded. “You’ll just have to pretend to be a girl for now anyway, you can dress as a boy again tomorrow and leave when My mom is at work.”

“Now sit down and let me finish you nails, Courtney” she finished, adding extra emphasis on my new name to try and get me into character quicker. 

“But I don’t want to have pink nails” I moaned at her like a baby. 

“My mom will be disappointed if you don’t come down looking pretty, now sit and please be quiet.” she said with a grin.

I grunted.

“Sit down or I’ll give you a full makeover!” she commanded. 

I sat back down on the bed. Kaitlyn went to work painting my nails in bubblegum pink polish. I began to think about how the evening was going to go, what we would talk about at dinner, where I was going to sleep and all that. 

“Kaitlyn?” 

“Yeah girlfriend?” she snickered at me; I just gave her a serious look. “What?” she asked. 

“What are we going to do tonight? I’m scared I’ll do something wrong and your mum will be onto us…what do we do?” I asked, my nervousness almost exploding in Kaitlyn’s face. 

“Just be polite, think girly thoughts, be girly you know, things will be fine and My mom wont find out.” She replied.

“I’m a boy, I don’t know how to act girly!” I blurted at her, she was obviously becoming more agitated by my nervousness. 

“Courtney, just shush, you’ll be fine, just be polite to my mum, take really small bites of your food, think about pink, think about unicorns, puppies, you know, you’ll be fine, I promise!” she encouraged me with a gentle stroke down my arm, then continued painting my nails in that bright yellow polish. 

“And don’t forget to smooth your skirt before you sit down, do that and Mum will never suspect a thing.” She said with a slight smirk.

“But I’m not wearing a skirt.” I said, confused.

“You will be.” Kaitlyn finished, her grin growing even bigger. 

It took half an hour for Kaitlyn to finish painting all my nails and toenails bubblegum pink, she decided to add little white hearts onto each of my nails and toenails so that her mom would be even more impressed when she saw them. By then it was dark outside and we could smell the food cooking downstairs. 

We began to talk more about what would happen at dinner.

“Courtney, I was thinking, when you’re at the table, ask Mum lots of questions, that way she wont have time to ask you any questions about where you’re from, you know? And if she does ask you a question, I’ll help you out okay?” 

“Okay, but what if she asks me about my parents? What do I say?” I replied.

“Just tell the truth, but don’t say they live next door, My mom will love you even more when you tell her how your parents treat you” she answered confidently. 

“Now you need some shoes, how about some ope toed sandals?” she asked. 

“OK.” I nodded, she grinned back at me and left the room to get them. While she was gone, I gave the room another look over, I checked out all of Kaitlyn’s shoes, some were girly, some were for sports and the others were for school, those were all black, some had flowers, all very girly. And then I saw them, the open toed sandals. At least they where white and not pink.

Kaitlyn soon returned holding a smaller pair of white open toed sandals.

“My mom bought me and Harpher matching shoes.” She smirked at me and gently sat me back down on the bed. With expert care she fit each shoe onto each foot, whilst having this content smile on her lips.

“Are you enjoying this?” I asked her as she put my shoes on me like a mother would do for a toddler. 

“It’s fun, it’s like dressing a baby.” She snickered.

“Hey, I am not a baby!” I shouted at her. 

“Courtney, honey.” She finished putting my shoes on me and then gently stroked my arm. “You’re acting like one right now.” I pouted at her and she just grinned back.

“Now turn around, there’s one thing missing, essential for a girl your age.” I grunted and turned around on the bed. Kaitlyn pulled my shirts off and walked out of the room again. 

I looked around again, this time at all of her toys stuffed animals that were sitting on the bed. There I noticed the blue package that Stephanie had given to Kaitlyn earlier, I reached out for the package and read the labelling. 

‘Tampax Pearl – plastic – 36 Tampons’ 

I was still reading the box when Kaitlyn was returned, she snatched the box away from me and hid it in her cupboard. 

“What are those?” I asked in my 12 year old’s innocent and confused voice.

“Don’t worry about those.” She replied.

“I bet its sweets made just for girls.” I added coolly, I knew my candy. 

“Not even close, they are for girl’s hygiene and if you’re not careful I’ll make you use one, now hold your arms up.” She made me go silent with that. 

I held my arms up and immediately felt a soft material around each arm sliding down to my shoulders, the same material passed over my face and settled around my chest. I felt Kirsty come closer and fiddle with something behind my back, I could smell the coconut perfume she was wearing, and similar to the one I was forced to wear. 

“This training bra makes it look like your boobies are starting to grow, girls your age wear these.” I nodded slowly, at least the training bra was just a plain white and honestly what was the point in fighting her now. I accepted the bra much easier than I accepted the panties for sure.

Kaitlyn slid the pink dress back over my head. She pulled me up off the bed and into a tight embrace, into my ear she whispered, “Whatever happens tonight, I want you to know that we will always be friends, no matter what.” I nodded slowly in reply.

Just a few moments later, we heard Stephanie shout up the stairs “Girls! Dinner is ready!”

Stephanie’s voice, and once again I found myself frozen to the floor. Kirsty must of felt like she was dragging a dead person as she pulled me down the stairs. 

During our short journey to the kitchen, I noticed an abundance of family photos on the walls. Not one of them had a boy in them, every photo either had Kaitlyn and Harpher together, Stephanie and Kaitlyn, Stephanie and Hayley. There wasn’t anyone who looked like they could be Kaitlyn’s father, which made me feel double as much horrified as I already was.

I joked to myself that one day I might find myself in one of those pictures, and not dressed as a boy. I’d have to be stuck in this house for years if that were to happen. 

At the bottom of the stairs we turned into the corridor, Kaitlyn marched me straight into the kitchen where her mother was setting the table. Kaitlyn’s advice kicked in immediately as I asked, or rather spat out, my first question.

“What are we having for dinner?” 

“Roast beef and potatoes, Courtney, I hope you like it.” She replied.

I was still getting used to my new name, every time Kaitlyn used it I felt my skin crawl.
But this time I had to force a smile so Stephanie didn’t get suspicious.

“Courtney loves roast beef, we were talking about our favourite foods earlier.” Kaitlyn added before I could reply, but she was still right, roast beef was one of my favourite meals. Kaitlyn gave me a sly wink when she realised what I was thinking about. 

“Okay, well take a seat and wait just a minute!” Stephanie said excitedly, she was really enjoying herself tonight.

She turned away to begin dishing out our dinners evenly whilst I sat down at the closest chair with a knife and fork in front of it. Kaitlyn remained standing for a few seconds, inspecting me. 

“Smooth that skirt on your dress before you sit down!” she said in her angry whisper, whilst pointing at the skirt on my dress that I’d never imagined wearing a dress at any point in my life. 

“But she’s not looking, it doesn’t matter if I don’t smooth it!” I whispered angrily back at her, and I was right! Stephanie wouldn’t need to see me being all ladylike, she’d just assume that a girl would of done it anyway. Besides, Courtney would of disappeared by tomorrow morning.

“Just do it, trust me, she’ll know if you don’t!” Kaitlyn gave me a menacing glare to try and convince me to do as she bid.

“I do it all the time and she always notices!” she added. 

I hastily stood back up and watched Kaitlyn as she began descended into her chair opposite me, running her hands down the back of her legs just before she touched the chair.

I nodded and did the same, smoothing the denim skirt before I sat down, at which point Suzanne turned around carrying two plates of roast beef and potatoes. She noticed me and had an impressed look on her face.

“Very ladylike manners you have, Courtney.” She smirked at me and then turned to her daughter. 

“I’m glad you two met, you could learn a lot from her, Kaitlyn.” She gave Kaitlyn a pat on the shoulder before turning away to get her own plate.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I whispered across the table to Kaitlyn, she gave me an evil stare and told me to shush, then returned to a happy smirk just as her mother set her plate down and sat down between us. 

Stephanie placed her hand on top of mine and grinned at me, it was almost like she was examining me closely. Shoot, did she know I wasn’t who she thought? My nerves were getting the better of me, and I nearly spewed out the truth onto the table. But it was Stephanie who spoke first. 

“I’m always trying to make Kaitlyn a bit more ladylike, you know, honestly I don’t think she’s ever smoothed her skirt on her dress before.” She looked across at Kaitlyn, giving me time to take a quick breath, I was safe, she looked me right in the eye and didn’t recognise me!

“I try to, Mother…” Kaitlyn said, trying to apologise.

“You mean, never?” I spoke nervously, still recovering from that close call.

Stephanie turned to me and nodded, “Never, well, perhaps once or twice.” 

Kaitlyn had an evil grin on her face while her mother wasn’t looking. I should have remembered how she liked to trick people, especially after she lured me into that lip-gloss trap earlier. She was making me act more like a girl than she was!

“She’s still a whiz with hair and makeup though, my little beautician.” Stephanie snickered at Kaitlyn and rested her hand on top of her daughter’s. For a moment the three of us were connected, and for a moment I actually felt good. I never really had these family moments at my house, even though this wasn’t my family, and I’d be escaping in the morning. I still felt better than I had been in hours. 

“Now girls, dig in and enjoy.” Stephanie declared, and the moment was over. I immediately skewered a potato on the end of my fork, and then cut it in half. This was how I normally ate at home, but apparently not in this house. Kaitlyn gave me a few discreet hand signals to tell me to take smaller bites, and I quickly cut up my potatoes into smaller bits.
I kept one eye on Stephanie throughout dinner, whenever it looked like she was about to say something, I would ask a question and make her forget what she was going to say. 

“This is a very nice house Mrs Allison.” I said after about 3 minutes of silence, Stephanie looked up and me and smiled contently.

“It’s not much but we can call it home.” She nodded slowly. “What’s it going to take to get you to call me Mom huh?” she grinned at me and took a sip of her wine.

I gave her a confused look, what does a boy disguised as a girl say to that? 

“Maybe it makes Courtney uncomfortable, Mom.” Kaitlyn jumped in, saving me from embarrassment, and now I could think of something to say. 

“I don’t really talk to my parents much.” I said with a bit of genuine sadness in my voice. It was true, I didn’t really talk to my mom or dad, and we didn’t really talk to each other if I’m being totally honest. 

“Oh you poor thing, I’m so sorry for the whole ‘calling me Mom’ thing, you can call me anything you want, okay?” Stephanie was genuinely upset for me, or for Courtney, or both of us, I wasn’t sure.

“Do you mind talking about them Courtney? We can talk about something else if you want.” Stephanie asked. 

I shrugged at her, confused. I didn’t really know anything about Courtney's parents, but she was under the impression that I knew everything about them. I struggled to think of a response, and looked to Kaitlyn for some guidance.

“Well Courtney told me earlier about them…” She looked at me and I just stared back blankly, what was she going to make up now?

“How they… How they disappeared mysteriously.” Kaitlyn nodded slowly and reached for her glass. Realising her daughter wasn’t going to say anymore about this poor little girl’s missing parents, or rather my missing parents, Stephanie's decided to shift her chair closer to mine and wrap her arm around my shoulders. My face was suddenly thrust into Stephanie’s chest, whilst she rested her head on top of mine, effectively clamping me in place. 

My nostrils were filled with her perfume, which I guessed was something made out of roses. It suited her incredibly friendly and loving nature I had to admit. I looked across the table at Kaitlyn who looked as surprised as I was, she also looked like she was about to burst out laughing, and thank god she didn’t! 

When she regained control of herself, Kaitlyn silently instructed me to wrap my arms around Suzanne and return the hug. 

Once I did that, Stephanie went into overprotective maternal mode. 

She began whispering soothing words in my ear, things like “It’ll all be okay”, “You’re safe now” but the one that actually hurt was “How two parents could abandon a pretty little girl like you is beyond me” 

I don’t know what did it, but after Stephanie gave all the loving whispers a rest and just kept me in her inescapable embrace, I began to cry. 

I hadn’t cried for years until now, I didn’t know how, it just happened. It must have been the mixture of the clothes I was wearing and the situation I was in. I couldn’t explain. I’m glad Suzanne didn’t say ‘let it all out’ because then we’d be there for years. 

In my blurred vision I noticed Kaitlyn had an astonished look painted on her face, I had a brief moment of glory when I realised I somehow surprised the ultimate trickster that Kaitlyn is. I didn’t get to see that look on her face for long, as Stephanie quietly commanded her to get some tissues. 

I felt the woman’s grip around me tighten, almost to a frightening level. I guess the story Kaitlyn and I made up… actually no, the story that Kaitlyn made up was tugging all of her mother’s heartstrings. If Stephanie had even more heartstrings than this, good luck to anyone who tugs on all of them. 

We finished dinner early after that, I wanted to rush upstairs and hide in Kaitlyn’s room until I died, but Kaitlyn made me stay to help with the dishes. 

We stood side by side at the sink, with me standing on top of a plastic step that looked like it hadn’t been used in years. Kaitlyn was doing the washing and I did the drying, we had a good rhythm going until Stephanie disturbed us.

“Aprons and gloves girls, we don’t want to ruin those pretty nails now, do we?”

She had snuck up behind us and lowered aprons over our heads, Kaitlyn began tying the apron’s string behind her back, whilst Stephanie had insisted on tying the strings of my apron herself. When the strings were too long to simply tie behind my back, she leaned over me and tied the strings into a bow resting just above my belly button. 

I felt like dying at that very moment because it was so embarrassing.

“Wow, looks like I wont have to do any work tonight, thank you girls. Courtney I’ll go clean up Harpher’s room so you can sleep comfortably tonight, okay?” she asked.

I looked at her closely, she looked like she herself was on the verge of tears, was Courtney’s story that sad? 

“Okay, thanks… Mom.” I replied, I thought I’d call her Mom to see if that’d make her happier, she gave me a knowing smile before disappearing down the hallway. I pondered what it would be like to have her as a mother, and it didn’t take me long to realise that anyone is better than my own mum. Kaitlyn is so lucky to have her. 

I was brought back to the painful reality by a sharp pain on my bare arm, I looked to see Kaitlyn pinching me, and looking at me as if I was some sort of freak.

“What was all that about?” she asked.

“I thought she’d cheer up if I called her Mom.” I replied.

“No, all that crying, was that acting?” she prodded me, a suspicious look on her face.

“No… Yes… I don’t know.” I shrugged at her.

“Your parents aren’t dead or missing you know, they’re just next door.” She smirked and gave me a friendly shoulder nudge. “Now put these on.” 

She handed me a pair of pink rubber gloves for the cleaning, she herself had claimed the less girly yellow pair.

“Do I have to?” I moaned at her, it wasn’t the cleaning I didn’t want to do, it was the pink gloves, and surely I had been humiliated enough.

“Yes, I worked really hard on your nails and I’m not going to let you ruin them.” She replied in a determined tone that meant I dared not refuse her. I slipped on the rubber gloves and continued with drying the dishes. For the next 30 minutes we spent cleaning the dishes, I kept thinking about that hug with Stephanie. Why did I start crying? I know, maybe her perfume was so strong that it made my eyes water? 

“So why did you start crying? Is my Mom’s perfume too strong for you?” Kirsty seemed desperate to find out what happened.

“I don’t know! I’ve never had a hug like that before.” I replied.

“Did your Mom ever hug you?” she asked right after I finished speaking, like some mad interrogator.

I shrugged at her and finished drying the dishes, the truth was my parents were never very friendly. My parents were the exact opposite of Kaitlyn’s mum. 

When we were done with dishes, Kaitlyn and I spent about an hour watching TV in the downstairs living room whilst Stephanie was upstairs in her bedroom - we guessed she was reading. When we were certain that Stephanie wasn’t coming back downstairs, it was around 8pm, we starting thinking of a plan for tomorrow morning.

It was simple really, Stephanie would leave for work at 8am, and Kaitlyn would wake me up at 9am. By 9:30 I would be dressed as a boy again, hair back to normal, nail polish removed and finally ready to leave the house. Nothing could go wrong. Since it was the summer holidays, making the plan was so much easier, Kaitlyn kept on saying how lucky I was that it wasn’t a school week. On a school day, Kaitlyn would wake up at the same time as her mother, has breakfast with her mother and then be driven to school by her mother, there was no free time for her on a school morning, certainly not enough time for a boy to escape the house.

I kept thinking about what would happen if this were a school week, how would I explain to Stephanie that I don’t go to school? I can’t tell her that my parents didn’t bother to find me a new school after I finished primary school, and that because of my parents I’ve missed a year of teaching. Nope, I wouldn’t tell her any of that, Kaitlyn would have to make up another wild story to cover it. 

Stephanie would probably make me tag along with her and Kaitlyn, and then register me at the same school… wait, I can’t think about things like that. If she registered me at a school then that would make this official, I’d be stuck as a pretend girl forever! And then later when I grew up, there wouldn’t just be hair on my legs… how would I explain that?

That familiar feeling of fear surging through my body had returned, again I was rooted to the spot. That is until I felt another familiar feeling, a pinching on my arm.
I jolted back to the present and snatched my arm away from Kaitlyn’s razor tipped fingers. 

“Hey, focus Courtney, what were you thinking about?” she asked me, a hint of concern on her face. 

“I just started thinking about this, if this lasted longer than tonight and tomorrow morning, or even if it became permanent.” I replied. A cold chill ran down my spine as I heard the word come from my mouth. Permanent? I’d be stuck like this, I’d be stuck as Lauren, and I’d have no real parents. It would be like I was born again but started my new life as a 12 year old, with no friends or family…

Kirsty clicked her fingers and waved her hand in front of my face. 

“Focus Courtney! Why would you want this to become permanent? Are you starting to enjoy being a girl?” she asked.

“No! I just keep worrying about things, you know, if they don’t go to plan tomorrow. What will we do then?” I asked.

“Trust me, we don’t need to think about that, the plan can’t fail. Mom is out of the house from 8am to 4pm, for the whole week. The plan will only fail if you’re still in the house when Mom gets back, and even if that happens you’ll just have to stay here one more night. The plan can’t go wrong twice.” She replied confidently, Kaitlyn really had thought this through, she was right. Nothing can go wrong. 

“Fine, just stop calling me Courtney, after tomorrow she doesn’t exist!” I grinned at her.

Kaitlyn pouted at me. “Please? I don’t have any friends called Courtney!” she tilted her head to the side and looked at me innocently.

I grunted. 

Later that evening, Kaitlyn and me were sitting in her room watching Nicky, Ricky, Dicky, and Dawn. We had spent five minutes arguing over what to watch, and then another five minutes for Kaitlyn to convince me that Nicky, Ricky, Dicky, and Dawn wasn’t as girly as I thought.
Stephanie came in during one of the ad breaks, carrying a bundle of clothes in her hands. 

“Hey you two. Courtney, I realised you probably haven’t brought any pyjamas with you so I found some that look about your size.” She said whilst stepping over to where we were sitting on the edge of Kaitlyn’s canopy bed. She sat down beside me.

“Oh thanks Mom, but…” I began to explain that I didn’t need them, since I wasn’t going to be a girl in the morning. But Stephanie was quick to stop me.

“No buts sweetheart, do you really think I’d make you sleep in that pink dress? These will be so much more comfortable.” She handed me the pile of clothes, which at first glance looked like another pile of pink. 

I smiled and nodded slowly, She patted my knee, then took me totally by surprise with a big wet kiss on the top of my head. Before I could say anything, she spoke again. 

“Kaitlyn, dear, could you see me outside for a second?” she asked, already moving to stand up. 

“Sure Mom…what for?” Kaitlyn replied, also standing up even if she didn’t know why. 

“Just come with me dear.” Stephanie replied quickly, and then calmly took Kaitlyn’s hand and led her out of the room.

Kaitlyn gave me one last look of confusion and worry as she slowly disappeared behind the door, which closed shut soon after she left. I didn’t know what to think of that, maybe her Mom had another package for her. I quickly realised this was the first time I was in Kaitlyn’s room alone, and that lead me into a strange train of thought. I’m dressed as a girl, nobody can tell I’m a boy, I’m in a girl’s room and I’m alone in that room. It’s like this is… my room? 

If someone were looking through the window, they’d certainly think that I’m a girl in my room. 

Oh god, this is just getting more and more uncomfortable by the second.

Kaitlyn had been with her mother for much longer than a second, I had to check what was going on. Did Stephanie know about me? Did she know my secret? I stood up from the bed, muted the TV and walked towards the wall. I put my ear against the wall and listened closely, Kaitlyn and her Mom were talking in Harpher’s room next door. 

“So you just met her in the park?” said Stephanie.

“She was sitting on a bench and looked really lonely, I sat with her Mom,” replied her rather nervous sounding daughter. 

“I hope Kaitlyn can make up a good enough story.” I whispered to myself. 

“I see, and there was nobody with her, no parents or guardians?” asked Stephanie. 

“Nobody Mom, she was sitting there all alone, I told you her parents disappeared.” Kaitlyn answered, there was a brief moment of silence, her mother must have been thinking.

“Does anyone look after her? Does she have a home?” asked Stephanie, the worry in her voice starting to grow. 

“She hasn’t mentioned anywhere or anyone.” Kaitlyn replied.

Was she trying to make her mom upset again with another sad story? It didn’t matter anyway, tomorrow I’ll be out of this costume and all the stories that Kaitlyn told her Mom would be forgotten in a few weeks. 

“That poor little girl, why would her parents abandon her like that?” asked Stephanie who sounded like she was talking through tears.

“She didn’t say, I don’t think she knows why, Mom.” Kirsty replied. I imagined they would be hugging right now to comfort each other, or at least to comfort Stephanie. 

“So she’s homeless and without a parent or guardian, and you’re her only friend?” asked Stephanie.

“Yes Mom but…” Kaitlyn sounded like she was about to tell her made up story, that would hopefully make Courtney’s disappearance in the morning nothing to worry about. But Stephanie answered her own question herself.

“We’re her only hope in this world, sweetheart, we have to protect her. I’d like her to stay here a bit longer so we can sort something out.” Stephanie was speaking with a determined edge to her voice, she was definitely not joking about that. 

“I’ll be gone in the morning, I’ll be gone in the morning, I’ll be gone in the morning.” I whispered over and over to myself. “She’s talking about someone who doesn’t exist.” 

“I don’t think that’s necessary Mom.” Kaitlyn sounded anxious, she was trying her best to make her Mom think Courtney would be okay. It sounded hopeless to persuade Stephanie otherwise, the story that Kaitlyn came up with was too sad, nobody would let Lauren go alone if they heard her story now. 

“This isn’t something we can say yes or no to Kaitlyn, we –have- to do this. Courtney won’t survive without our help. How long has she been on her own?” asked Stephanie whose maternal instincts were going into overdrive. 

“Her parents disappeared just after she finished junior school at the beginning of the holidays, so two or three weeks? She’s only eleven but she knows how to survive.” 

“I’m twelve, Kaitlyn, twelve!” I whispered to myself, though I partly wanted Kirsty to hear me.

Kaitlyn was still pursuing the hopeless goal of making Courtney look like a natural born survivor, but her mother wasn’t budging. 

“My decision is final sweetheart, I know your just defending her, making it sound like she can cope. But you know the truth, she is a frightened little girl who needs us!” she said.

“Ask her to stay tomorrow until I get back from work, and when I get back I’ll ask her to stay for a few more days, perhaps weeks. We can talk about all the complicated stuff another time, for now just go brush your teeth and get ready for bed, there’s a good girl.” Stephanie rushed the last few words of her little speech, clearly wanting to end the conversation quickly so her daughter couldn’t complain. 

I retreated back from the wall, one thought in my mind, I have to get out of this place.

I left the pyjamas that Stephanie had given me on the bed, I stood on the spot for a good few seconds thinking about them. I have to get out of here, no more girls clothes for me. Here are my options, leave now wearing these girl’s clothes and somehow sneak back into my house without getting caught by either my parents or Kaitlyn’s Mom. 

Or.

Pretend to be a girl for the night and leave first thing in the morning as planned, without any risks. But that means I’d have to wear the girl’s pyjamas, sleep in the room of an eight-year-old girl and for the first time in my life, wake up in someone else’s house. 

It was a decision that took a long time to make, but it was the smart decision. The first smart decision I’d made all day actually. I walked over to the pyjamas and picked up the top half first, because it was on the top of the pile but mostly because it was one of the few things in the room which wasn’t pink! 

I lifted it up and examined it closely, the long sleeves were still pink, but the chest…oh god. This was a Minnie Mouse pyjama set, with Minnie on the front surrounded by pink hearts on a white background. The bottom half were just plain pink pyjama bottoms, reaching down to my ankles when I was finally dressed in the outfit. It had taken a while to get out of those pink and white striped leggings. When I was ready for bed, I sat down on Kaitlyn’s bed and turned the volume back up on the TV, Nicky, Ricky, Dicky, and Dawn was still on and I wanted to see how it ended.

Kaitlyn came back into the room a few minutes later, wearing a silky pale pink shirt with a matching pair of loose fitting trousers. Clearly her pyjamas were for older girls, and mine were for little girls. “This will be over soon.” I told myself repeatedly as Kaitlyn sat down on the bed in silence.

“We have a problem.” Kaitlyn said in a blank voice, looking defeated.
“I heard everything, but it doesn’t change our plan does it? I’m still getting out of here tomorrow.” I said confidently. 

“Yes, you’re right, it’s just Mom, she’ll do anything to keep Courtney here.” She replied. 

There was a brief moment of silence, we looked at each other, Kaitlyn looked as worried as I was.

“We’ll think of something.” We said together, equal amounts of determination in our voices. 

Stephanie came into the room just as Nicky, Ricky, Dicky, and Dawn finished, she was wearing a silky white robe with lace around the edges and white fluffy bits around the neck. 

“Now girls, I know how much we all like Nicky, Ricky, Dicky, and Dawn but it’s really time for bed.” 
She said with a smile directed right at me. “Your room is this way Courtney.” 

She walked over to me and placed her gentle hand on the back of my shoulder, I took the hint and slid of the bed. “Good night Kaitlyn.” I said over my shoulder, Stephanie continued to shepherd me out of her daughter’s room with her arm now around my shoulders.

“Good night sweetheart.” Stephanie said in a gentle voice as she turned off the light and closed the door just as Kaitlyn replied with a long winded “Niiiiight.” 

Stephanie guided me to the right, the door to Harpher’s room was right next to Kaitlyn’s so it wasn’t much of a journey. She turned the room’s light back on to reveal a little girl’s paradise. I thought Kaitlyn’s room was a little girl’s room, but Harpher’s was on another level of girlyness. 

The entire room was pink, except for the chest of drawers below the pink window frame, that was purple. The bed was to the left, against the wall. A much simpler bed compared to Kaitlyn’s, no curtains on this one, but the sheets were pink, the bed frame was pink, the carpet was closer to white than pink, but still looked pink. To the right, against the wall I had listened through earlier was a large white cabinet with its doors open. A small pink TV sat on the center shelf, framed with plastic hearts of different colours, on the top and bottom shelf was a collection of Disney Princesses. I knew from what Kaitlyn told me that Harpher loved everything relating to the Disney Princesses, even the pink bean bag sitting in the center of the room had a picture of Ariel, Rapunzel, Belle and Cinderella sitting together on a pink cloud. The walls were pink, with the bottom sections decorated with different princesses dancing together. To the left of the door, the last thing I noticed was a glossy pink vanity table, complete with several hairbrushes and a load of Disney branded plastic toys. 

I could not wait to get out of this room, I just wanted to turn around, run down the stairs and out the front door, But Stephanie kept me under her control, slowly guiding me towards the bed. I did as I was told, repeating the “I’m leaving this place tomorrow” line in my head over and over. 

“Forgetting something?” Stephanie suddenly asked, pointing at my hair.

“What?” I replied.

“Don’t worry, Mommy can handle it.” She was quick to act, within seconds I was sat down in front of the vanity table, staring at myself in the mirror. Stephanie removed the flowery hair clips and the hair tie keeping my hair in a ponytail, and then spent what seemed like an age on brushing my hair. 

“I always loved brushing my daughter’s hair before they went to bed.” I saw her beaming smile in the mirror. She was getting way too comfortable with this, she’s starting to think of me as her daughter. When she finished with my hair, it was silky smooth like the material of her robe, just as wavy as Kaitlyn’s hair and looked double the length it was when I woke up in the morning, reaching a few inches below my shoulders. Now I really looked like a girl, all traces of my boyishness were gone, replaced by an 11-year-old girl with my face.

“Now for bed, come on you.” 

I was perfectly fine with getting into bed myself, but Stephanie didn’t think that when she lifted me up, cradled me against her shoulder, and then placed me in Harpher’s bed. She sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled the covers over me, tucking me in like a mother would do for her child. She smiled down at me, I gave her a nervous smile back.

“Courtney?” she asked just as I was about to turn over onto my belly to sleep. I really wasn’t used to having someone tucking me in at night like this. I looked at her blankly, forcing a smile, why wont this woman leave me alone? 

“You can stay here for a few days if you want, okay?” she placed her hand on the covers, where my knee was. 

“I know Mom… but I don’t think I’ll stay.” If Kaitlyn couldn’t make Courtney sound like an 11-year-old survival expert, then I’ll give it a try. She smiled knowingly at me, as if she knew what I was doing.

“Think about it, maybe I’ll see you tomorrow and we’ll talk then, okay?” she asked. 

“Good night Mom.” I said quickly and turned to face the wall. I wont be there in the morning to talk to her, she’ll just have to live without Lauren. 

In the corner of my eye I looked at Stephanie as she sat on the bed looking at me, a smirk on her lips. I closed my eyes, thinking she would leave after that, conversation over. Then I felt her weight shift on the bed, her fingers on my face, brushing the strands of hair away from my eyes, and then her soft lips kissing me on the forehead. I kept my eyes closed to hide my discomfort. She left the bed, the light turned off, and her voice turned into a quiet whisper. 

“Good night sweetheart.” Were the last words I heard that night

(This is over tomorrow, this is over tomorrow, this is over tomorrow)

~ The Next Morning ~

I was woken up the next morning at around 9am, as planned, not by Kaitlyn, but by the sound of the front door closing. 

Not as planned. 

I jumped out of the bed, something was definitely wrong. The plan we had made, the plan that we knew wouldn’t go wrong, was already going wrong. Maybe Kaitlyn just slept in… and the door closing, that was just Stephanie leaving late for work, she must have slept in too. Yes, that has to be it.

I looked around the room, I needed to find my boy clothes quickly if the plan was still going to work. I couldn’t find them anywhere in Harpher’s room, so the next stop was Kaitlyn’s room. I quietly snuck out of Harpher’s room, still dressed in my Minnie Mouse pyjamas, and grasped Kaitlyn’s door handle. One simple twist and I was in… a simple twist. I turned the handle and pushed the door, it didn’t budge one bit. I tried again, turning, twisting, pushing, turning the other way, pulling, kicking… every method failed, the door was jammed. But it was working fine yesterday, it must be locked, yes, locked. Why would it be locked? Did Stephanie lock her daughter into her room? Was she onto us? 

It took me a while to notice, but if Kaitlyn wasn’t awake after five minutes of banging on her door, she probably wasn’t in the room. Stupid. Think smart. Kaitlyn must have changed the plan, just to scare me a little more, since her fun was soon going to end when Courtney no longer existed. I rushed back into Harpher’s room to think things over. 

Kaitlyn clearly wasn’t around, her Mom would be on the way to work by now. I was alone in the house. The front door would be locked again, the two keys with Kaitlyn and Stephanie, and I would have to leave through the back gate. Now I just needed to find my clothes so I could actually go outside, Kaitlyn must of put them downstairs. After pacing back and forth for a minute to sort things out, I turned to the door, and there hanging from a hook was a fluffy pink robe, with Minnie Mouse printed onto the breast. 

“This must go with my pyjamas, I might as well put that on too.” I said quietly to myself. 

I pulled the robe on, tied the sash around me into a rough and manly knot and headed downstairs. No sign of my green shirt and shorts yet, I turned into the living room, still no boy clothes. Into the kitchen, still nothing. The last place left to check was the conservatory, Kaitlyn wouldn’t leave boy clothes in her Mom’s room, unless she wanted her to find out about my secret. I stepped into the conservatory, but before I could actually have a good look, I froze. 

There, sitting on a wooden garden chair, sipping her morning tea… was Stephanie. She was wearing a colourful summer dress with some sort of cardigan on top. She hadn’t spotted me, so I snuck back into the house and hid behind the kitchen table. 

This was NOT part of the plan. 

What was she doing here? Shouldn’t she be at work by now? 

(Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap) 

Then that means Kaitlyn was the one of closed the front door to wake me up, why would she leave me here with her Mom? I couldn’t think of why my best friend would betray me like this. She better have a good reason. She probably told her Mom everything, and Stephanie is just sitting there waiting for me to wake up so she can start shouting at me. 

My first thought was to run, but where? The front door was locked, and Stephanie would see me if I left through the back gate. There was no way to get past her. The only chance I had was to climb out of some window, but wearing Minnie Mouse pyjamas? What are my parents going to say when I ring the doorbell? 

I had no choice, I had to escape now, get as far away from Stephanie as possible. I slowly stood up and crept into the living room. There it was, my escape route. The large front window which I hoped wasn’t locked was just a few feet away, I took one step forward, and then everything went dark. 

I heard Stephanie’s familiar voice, but it wasn’t angry or psychotic like I thought it would be, it was sweet, loving, like it was last night. 

“There you are dear, Good morning,” she said, I was not planning on hearing her voice ever again, but a nice “Good morning” was better than “I’m going to kill you!” 

I was still in darkness, I turned to where her voice was coming from, my fists readying themselves to punch something. Stephanie thought nothing of my raised fists and quickly pulled me into her warm embrace once again. She pulled away whatever it was that was blinding my vision and kissed me on the forehead, again something I wasn’t planning on getting in the morning. 

Stephanie was sitting in front of me, her eyes level with mine, and a beaming smile on her face. 

“And your wearing Harpher’s Minnie Mouse robe!” she said, her voice over flowing with maternal love, I still got the wrong idea, thinking I did something wrong. 

“I’ll take it off if…” I began, but Stephanie interrupted me with a finger on my lips. 

“Sweetheart, Harpher is at camp for the summer, she wont mind if you wear her things, and nor do I.” She smiled at me, and then grinned evilly. 

So that’s where Harpher is.

“Besides it makes you look absolutely adoraaaaable!” Her voice seemed to turn into a strange mix of laughing, squeaking and yelling. Her hands crawled up my sides and started tickling beneath my armpits, even through the robe and the pyjamas I was incredibly ticklish. My body collapsed onto the floor in a fit of hysterical laughter, Stephanie was relentless, she moved to sit on top of me, her fingers tickling up and down my sides. 

All my fears seemed to disappear during that fit of laughter, Stephanie clearly didn’t know who I really was, or she was hiding it well, or she knows but just reacted in the exact opposite way Kaitlyn and me expected. I was safe for now at least. 

I had never laughed so hard until that point, Stephanie had to hold me against her shoulder like a baby for a good few minutes before I calmed down. When I was finally feeling normal, I was sitting in the same chair I sat in last night at dinner with a glass of orange juice on the table in front of me. 

I reached for it, and for the first time in a while I noticed my polished pink nails, or bubblegum pink, as Stephanie would say. That was a harsh reminder of my situation, I’m stuck pretending to be a girl here, and I’m still a boy. I had to remind myself of that. 
I think during that laughing fit, I actually felt like this was my home, I felt like I was happy. But I would rather have a happy life as a boy, not as a pretend girl. I would just have to survive my parents until I was eighteen, and then I was free to do what I wanted. A happy life as a boy was all I wanted right now. 

Stephanie rested her hand on mine and gently stroked it with her thumb, bringing me back to the present once more. 

“Courtney?” she asked, concerned. 

“I was… daydreaming.” I replied, and then took a sip of the juice. It was just right, cool, refreshing and only slightly sour. 

“Can we talk?” she asked.

I nodded slowly and waited for her to say something.

Oh god, I forgot… she wants to ask me… it was too late to stop Stephanie from talking without raising suspicion. 

“I was wondering, how do you feel about staying here for a bit longer, maybe something more… permanent?” 

I cold chill ran down my spine.

I didn’t know what to say to her, I knew what she was going to ask, I just hadn’t planned on answering her. I should be in my own house by now eating bacon, not sitting with a near complete stranger in her house, dressed as a girl. I took a few moments to think of an answer, but I couldn’t find one, so I asked her a question in the hope she’d forget what just happened. 

“Why… shouldn’t you be at work Mom?” I asked, I was starting to get used to calling her Mom by now. 

“Oh I decided to take the day off, I didn’t want to wait until later to ask you since you might of disappeared by then.” She replied with a grin, it was as if she enjoyed destroying every chance I had of escaping. 

“Disappeared?” I asked.

“Well Kaitlyn told me about your situation, and she seemed to think you’d be leaving soon.” She replied. 

I grinned and nodded slowly. I am leaving soon, and you can’t stop me woman. She tilted her head and gave me a sad look. 

“Well where do you plan on going?” She asked all the right questions, meaning the questions I didn’t have a straight answer for. 

“I’ll find somewhere.” I nodded and gulped down a load of orange juice. I was hoping the glass would hide my ever-reddening cheeks. 

“So you’re not even certain? Do you really want to leave a warm comfortable house for a world of uncertainty?” It was like she was trying to confuse me on purpose with her long words, so I’d have no choice but to say yes to her. I shrugged at her and said nothing. That wasn’t saying yes and now she had to do all the work. Two can play at this game. 

“I think it would be best if you stayed here for a while.” She leaned closer, her thumb still gently rubbing my hand. 

I shrugged and kept silent. I looked out the window and into the distance, so it would look like I was thinking. I was really just trying to ignore her. 

“I know what’s best for you Courtney, you won’t survive on your own.” 

I continued to ignore her/look like I was thinking. I didn’t care what she said, even if I wasn’t planning on it I knew how to survive on my own. 

The cul-de-sac kids always loved playing with Sophie in the nearby woods. We considered ourselves survival experts, but Stephanie wasn’t going to believe that when it came from someone dressed in pink Disney Princess pyjamas.

Stephanie sighed and leaned back into her chair, she looked defeated. All the rejection she was getting from me was really tearing her up inside, but no amount of tears can convince me to remain a girl any longer.

All I could do was wait until tomorrow, Stephanie couldn’t miss work for two days straight could she? Why would she choose protecting a homeless orphan over keeping her job? 

“Just think about it okay? For me?” she asked with puppy dog eyes, rarely had I seen an adult use that look. 

“I will Mom.” I nodded and finished my orange juice, Stephanie jumped into action as soon as my empty glass touched the table. 

“Let’s get you ready for the day then, up you get.” Stephanie was making a habit of doing things before I could react. She was up out of her chair in seconds, holding my hand and pulling me down the hallway when I finally said “Okay.” As we went up the stairs I got another chance to look at all the family photos hanging on the wall, and the thought of me being in one of them was slowly becoming more and more likely. 

Stephanie dragged me into the bathroom, which was a pleasant change from all the pink I was seeing. The floor was made of a white rubbery material and the walls were decorated with yellow and white tiles. The bathtub spanned from one side of the room to the other, beside it was the sink and opposite that was the toilet. I would of preferred sleeping in here compared to Harpher’s room, if only there was a bed in here. 

“Now when was the last time you had a bath?” 

It looked like whatever I said, Stephanie was going to give me a bath anyway. She already pulled off my Disney Princess robe and placed it on a hook screwed to the bathroom door. 

“A few days ago.” I replied. It was true, we only had one bathroom in my house and mum and dad had been hogging it for three days, there was hardly any hot water left for me. I must have been dirty enough to be a homeless kid. 

“That wont do dear, it’s important us girls stay as clean as possible.” She opened the taps on the bath and it began to fill up with steaming hot water. She poured a purple liquid, among other things, into the bath that turned it into a flowery scented bubble bath. The longer she stayed in the bathroom, the more I began to think that she herself was going to wash me.

That would be the end of me for sure. She would see everything! I was just starting puberty and things were going on down there! The bubbles would be my only hope, they’d hide my hairy legs and my boy parts. Luckily my arms were mostly hairless, and as long as I kept my arms by my sides the small amount of armpit hair I had would be hidden. 

She wouldn’t really stay would she? Does she think 12 year olds cant bathe themselves? I knew I could bathe myself by around 6 years old, by 10 I was making my own meals.

Maybe Stephanie ran things differently in her house, maybe this was what a loving family was like. 

The bath was ready and Stephanie was making no moves to the door, she stood there watching me, I noticed her foot tapping on the floor. 

“Scared of the water Courtney?” she asked.

“No, I just…” I looked at her nervously. Stephanie walked over to me, and began to lift the Disney Princess pyjama top over my head.

“Thought I’d leave?” she finished my sentence. “There’s nothing underneath these pretty pyjamas that I haven’t seen before sweetheart.” She grinned at me as she folded the top and placed it on top of the toilet. Her hands quickly moved the pyjama bottoms that were still hiding the vital evidence between my legs, although she’d still have to remove the white cotton panties I’d worn from yesterday. 

She wouldn’t go that far would she? 

I stepped away from her prying hands before she could pull my pink pyjama bottoms down. I had to put my foot down for once. 

“Mom I’m… eleven, not four.” I wanted to say twelve, but Kaitlyn had already decided I was going to be eleven. Damn that Kaitlyn, wherever she was. 

“I know… I just thought you might want some help, that’s all.” She replied, her hands then made another attempt to pull my bottoms down. I was quick to take another step back, almost falling into the bath in the process, and crossed my arms. Stephanie finally got the message and opened the bathroom door. 

“Well alright, you just call me if you need anything, okay sweetheart?” She asked as she stood in the doorway. I replied with an annoyed sounding “Okay!” and closed the door for her. I waited for a moment before I took off the remainder of my Disney Princess pyjama set, just in case she came back in and saw me naked. She seemed like the sort of woman who liked to surprise people, but it would be me that surprised her if she saw what hung between my legs. 

I waited a good few minutes before I finally decided it was safe to strip off. All this waiting and worrying wouldn’t be necessary if they thought to put a lock on the door. I suppose living in an all female household meant you wouldn’t be seeing anything new if you stepped in on someone.

I pulled the pyjama bottoms and the panties off in less than three seconds and was in the bath after four seconds. I figured the shorter time I was naked, the less chance I had of being walked in on.

Now I was safe beneath the bubbles. 

Stephanie shouted from various locations around the house, asking if I was doing all right. She sounded worried every time, sometimes I shouted, “YES” and sometimes I didn’t even reply. 

She shouted for me every five minutes or so, what was she so worried about? Did she think I might be trying to escape? There was only one window in here, and it wasn’t big enough for anyone to sneak through, not that I hadn’t thought about trying.

The water was high enough for me to fully submerse myself. I could hide there forever if I could breath underwater. I spent about five minutes scrubbing myself with the sponges placed around the bathtub, along with all the other products that these girls seem to need. By the sink there was a counter filled with tubs, cans, boxes and bath stuff. The bottle that Stephanie had used to get the bubbles came with three other bottles, one in blue, one in red and the other in yellow. 

The faint pink colouring to the bubbles meant she had obviously used the pink bottle, which was no surprise to me. Everything that has happened to me in this house so far has had something to do with pink. Stephanie had raised two girly-girl daughters, and in the back of my mind it seemed like she was trying to raise a third, me.

My long hair was the last thing left to wash. I normally left it for last and kept it dry until then, but keeping it dry was so much harder with it being double as long after Stephanie brushed it out. When I wash my hair, I usually just soak it in water a few times and then dry it, that kept it rough and curly like I always had it, but now it was long and smooth.

My hair was always long, but I deliberately made it look messy so people didn’t think I was a girl. But now I had to make it look like a girls hair, and I didn’t know how. I eventually decided I’d just soak it a couple more times than I normally do and then see what happened when it was dry, besides it would be back to normal boy mode soon. 

I was about to dip my head underwater to start the hair soaking, when Stephanie opened the door slightly and poked her head through.

“Courtney? Can I come in?” she asked, already stepping into the bathroom before I answered. 

I was nearly fully submersed so she wouldn’t see anything, it would be fine as long as she didn’t drop something in the bath and go searching for it. 

I nodded at her to come in but she was already inside and closing the door behind her.

“I just wanted to check on how you’re doing.” She walked closer and sat on the edge of the bath, I quickly moved some more bubbles to cover me up even more. I made sure my head was the only thing above the water at this point. 

“I’m fine, Mom, no problems.” I replied. 

“I noticed you haven’t washed your hair yet.” She was looking at my hair closely, it would have been obvious that most of it was still dry.

“I didn’t know what to do.” I said, and it was the wrong thing to say. Without knowing it I’d just invited this woman to wash my hair for me.

“Oh, I’ll do that for you, I knew you’d need help somewhere.” She was smiling from ear to ear as she left briefly and came back with a chair. Within a few minutes she was sitting down beside the bath, with me sitting with my back to her. She was using the adjustable showerhead to soak my hair thoroughly, and so far she hadn’t seen anything suspicious. It was quite a struggle trying to sit like that in a narrow bath, without my lower half revealing itself, but somehow I managed. 

Stephanie spent a couple of minutes spraying my hair with warm water, then moved on to lathering in a load of shampoo. My head was gently being pulled this way and that as Stephanie made sure the shampoo covered every single strand of hair, her fingers constantly massaging my scalp. After a couple of minutes she rinsed my hair with warm water and started over again, it felt like we were there for at least an hour, repeating the process over and over. Stephanie was talking through everything she did, making sure I remembered everything so I could “do it myself in the future.” Yeah right.

I got the feeling that Stephanie had done this many times with her daughters, she was clearly enjoying it and on several occasions called me Kaitlyn or Harpher. I’m glad I was facing away from her, because soon everything she said made me roll my eyes or grimace. Soon every sentence she said referred to me as her daughter or something close to it. 

When she ran out of things to say, things were finally going silent. Stephanie rinsed my hair for a final time and grabbed a new bottle that she referred to as ‘conditioner’ and began to comb the new liquid through my hair with her fingers. 

I had never put this much effort into washing my hair.

The constant massaging of my scalp eventually made me relax, and I started to think. I could of escaped this morning if it wasn’t for Stephanie’s damned maternal hormones. Everything would of gone to plan. Maybe things still would of gone to plan if Kaitlyn was actually there, she could of snuck me out the front door using her key, whilst Stephanie was in the back garden. It all could of worked out fine if Kaitlyn was there, except… where was Kaitlyn?

“Mom, where is Kaitlyn?” I had to ask her, had Stephanie done something with her daughter? Maybe she had some sort of plan to replace her, with me? Well that would explain why she referred to me as her daughter for the past hour of hair washing. What was wrong about Kaitlyn? Why wouldn’t Stephanie want to keep her eldest daughter?

“Oh I just sent her on an errand, to get some milk.” She replied coolly as if replacing her daughter wasn’t such a big thing. 

“Come to think of it, she’s been there for a while, maybe she found one of her friends, she doesn’t see them much.” 

What was she talking about? Kaitlyn spends most of her time playing with the rest of the cul-de-sac kids. 

“Finally she does something I suggest, she spends too much time with the kids that live in the cul-de-sac and forgets about her school friends.” She said.

“What’s wrong with the cul-de-sac kids?” I asked.

“Oh nothing, it’s just that Sophie across the road, she has a deep hatred for my little Harpher. But don’t you worry about them dear, I’m sure we’ll find you some friends, perhaps Kaitlyn will invite you to a sleepover with her friends. Wont that be nice?” she replied.

“I guess so.” I didn’t plan on making any new friends just yet. 

Soph was one of my best friends, but she really did hate Harpher. I remember her calling Harpher a spoiled little brat whenever they were close to each other. Harpher called her an ugly man once, and they’ve been at each other’s throats since then, that’s probably why Harpher was sent to summer camp in the first place. 

After a few minutes, the conditioner was rinsed out from my hair and the bath was over. Stephanie allowed me some private time to dry myself and get dressed, but when I went to get dressed again, the pyjamas and the panties were gone. I shouted through the door asking for them, hoping Mom would hear me.

“I’m putting them in the wash dear, I put a cute little outfit on Harpher’s bed for you!” she shouted back, it sounded like she was downstairs so it was too late to argue for my pyjamas. I would have to wear an outfit picked out by Stephanie herself. I expected the worst.

Stephanie had left the Disney Princess robe in the bathroom, which I quickly put it on before she could sneak into the bathroom again. This was the first time I noticed that the robe had a pink hood attached to it, with two little black ears and a pink bow between them at the top of the hood. That must have been what Stephanie used to blindfold me this morning, I would of looked like a right idiot with that hood up. Clearly she did not think so.

I opened the bathroom door and poked my head out into the hallway, no sign of Stephanie anywhere upstairs. I was very paranoid when wearing that robe, I didn’t want Stephanie anywhere near me. I was certain she wanted to see me naked, she seemed to eager to make it seem okay but I was not convinced. I kept thinking she was going to sneak out of somewhere and pull the robe off me, but thankfully I got into Harpher’s room and closed the door before Stephanie could get me. 

There wasn’t a way to lock the door, so I moved a chair and wedged it beneath the door handle, something I’d learned from the movies. As soon as I turned around I knew I would see an incredibly girly outfit lying on Hayley’s bed, but when I saw it I was definitely surprised. The outfit wasn’t half as girly as I thought it would be, it wasn’t even pink! 

It was a white T-shirt with baby blue polka-dots a pair of blue panties and white polka-dots, black leggings and some shiny looking black shoes.

I pulled the panties on first, then spent several minutes struggling with the leggings. 

I’m pretty sure I had the most miserable face in the world whilst I was doing all of this.

The T-shirt slipped over my head easily and the shoes seemed to slip onto my feet without a fuss, as if they were made just for my feet. But that didn’t mean I liked them any better. I definitely preferred the pink converses to these shoes, they just cover up the toes, have slightly raised heels and a strap across the ankle which I assumed was a girl’s version of shoe laces. 

I took one shoe off and looked at the label inside, it read ‘Angry Angels Girls Innocent Wedge Shoes, Size 5’ 

I used to think I was a bigger shoe size, but since these shoes fit so easily, I guess I was wrong. At least when I put them on I felt a bit taller.

When I was finally dressed, I had run out of things to do. I didn’t want to go downstairs because that would mean talking to Stephanie, and I didn’t think I could handle another couple of hours of her referring to me as her daughter. I decided to stay in Harpher’s room, sitting in front of her vanity table until I could find something to do.

Stephanie came in before I could fall asleep due to boredom, I was resting my head on my hand, glaring at my reflection in the mirror when she asked “Courtney, what’s wrong?” 

I shrugged and said the honest truth “I really don’t know what to do Mom could you possibly help and braid my hair after you dry it.” 

“Well shure sweetie but first we can start with drying your hair, stay right there.” Stephanie rushed out the door and walked down the hallway to what I guessed was her room, she came back holding a lethal looking hairdryer. 

“You look nice in that.” She eyed me up and down whilst she plugged in the hairdryer. “Do you like it?” she asked. 

“It’s not pink.” I said with a smile, I was genuinely happy that I wasn’t wearing anything pink for once.

“We’ll have to get you some new clothes then, nearly all of Harpher’s clothes are pink.” She replied.

“What about this?” I looked down at my partially blue and white outfit and smiled, I didn’t know how but wearing this black dress was making me feel really good.
I'm on
“That’s one of Kaitlyn’s old sleepwear and tights, the rest of her stuff wont fit you dear, so you can wear this for a day and then go back to Harpher’s stuff.”

I nodded my reply and smiled, I wouldn’t be going back to Harpher’s stuff ever again after tomorrow, when I was sure to be a boy again. Stephanie turned on the hairdryer and soon my hair was being blown all over the place, she combed through the dried bits of hair whilst still drying the wet bits. When the hair drying was finally over, she went back to brushing my hair over and over. 

“Have you ever thought about getting your ears pierced Courtney?” she asked, her eyes w asere looking straight at me in the mirror while her hands continued to work with my hair. 

“I don’t know, do I need to?” I replied. I didn’t know what else to say.

“Most girls your age have their ears pierced honey, I got mine pierced when I was ten.” She seemed oddly proud of that. 

I shrugged at her. Piercing my ears was another thing I was never planning on doing. 

“It really doesn’t hurt, they make sure your ears wont hurt one bit, I promise.” It sounded like she was already planning on getting my ears pierced. I looked at myself in the mirror and I had a look of pure fear on my face, Stephanie smirked and continued brushing my hair until it was silky smooth just like the night before.

But she wasn’t finished there, she pinned back some hair behind my right ear using a hair clip cleverly disguised as a large white flower to go with my long blonde hair.

“There, as pretty as a flower.” Stephanie grinned. I grimaced when she wasn’t looking.

I was finally ready to face the day when Stephanie spritzed me with the same coconut perfume I had been forced to wear the day before. We then had breakfast together, watched TV together and then had lunch together. At no point did Stephanie think I was a boy, and if she didn’t see anything suspicious after spending half a day sitting right beside me, then she wasn’t going to see anything suspicious, period. 

Kaitlyn still wasn’t home, she was obviously having more fun with her friends than I was. Every moment with Stephanie was torture, even watching TV was hard when she sat with you. I was the one who suggested watching some TV, and she agreed with me, saying it was a great idea as long as she had control of the remote. Immediately we were watching Girl Meets World, Austin and Ally and Jessie one after the other. 

It was the most boring 2 hours of television ever, at least for a boy, I’d imagine it would be super-fun for girls. 

When Stephanie had finally caught up on all her shows, she took it upon herself to repaint my nails, this time in a baby blue polish from her own collection. She sarcastically said it was made especially for maturing young girls such as myself, as if to humiliate me even more. 

I had continued to chew on my nails during my stay with the Allison family, and this had left them in what Stephanie called ‘an absolutely appalling state’ and decided that she would buy me some fake nails when we went shopping later on. Wait, shopping? 

“We’re going shopping?” I asked her.

“Well I was planning on going shopping today anyway, just for food, but we can pick up some stuff for you too, dear.” She was quick to reply, again it seemed like she had planned this all out very carefully. 

“We?” I said, my voice riddled with fear. I was –not- going outside dressed like this. My parents would just have to look out the window and they’d see their son dressed like some little girl. I still had hope of returning to my own house but I wasn’t going to return to it just to get instant abuse for being dressed like this.

“You’re too young to be left alone, sweetheart, what if you hurt yourself and I wasn’t here to help? I would never forgive myself if something happened to you.” It seemed Stephanie had not turned off ‘mummy mode’.

“Pretty girls like you should always be outside in the summer, you know.” 

There she goes again with that ‘pretty girl’ stuff, and that was it, I’d finally had enough of all this humiliation. 

“You know what, I am tired of being called pretty this and pretty that, it’s time this whole thing ended and I went home.” I looked across the living room and through the large front window, without realising that Stephanie had moved somewhere. My mind must have been thinking ‘she’s still next to you, keep talking’ 

“Courtney doesn’t even exist, she’s someone that Kaitlyn made up so she wouldn’t get into trouble. That’s it. I’m going home.” I tried to emphasise ‘home’ as much as possible, so it was clear that this time, I was really going home. 

I looked around, for some reason wanting to see Stephanie’s reaction to my big speech, but she was nowhere to be found. I walked into the kitchen, thinking she was standing in there in some state of shock, but she wasn’t there either. I soon heard her coming down the stairs and down the hallway, holding a Dalmatian print faux fur jacket in pink that looked like it would fit an 11-year-old girl perfectly.

“It may be late June but today it’s a bit chilly, I had to get one of Harpher’s jackets for you, what were you saying? Something about Kaitlyn getting in trouble?” It sounded like she hadn’t heard any of my speech except for the bit about Kaitlyn, I guess I didn’t say it loud enough.

“It was a different Kaitlyn” was good enough to throw her off the trail. My moment was gone as soon as she wrapped the fur jacket around me and buttoned me up before I could do it myself. 

Why did she always have to be in such a rush? If she had stayed to listen to me when I finally had the courage to reveal all, then I’d be out of this mess. Would she even believe me if she did hear the whole thing? What if she did hear the whole thing but didn’t think anything of it? I do make quite a convincing girl, even I had to admit it.

Stephanie grabbed a hold of my hand and led me out into the great outdoors, it was such a new experience. I’d left my house to play outside thousands of times, but now I was stepping outside as a girl, a completely different person. I started acting like a completely different person as soon as I took the first step onto the Allison’s driveway, it felt like everyone was watching, waiting for me to reveal myself as a boy. But I’d lost all my courage after that speech. I began to cling onto Stephanie’s hand like a 6 year old girl like she was my only source of protection, and she offered a good hiding spot until we got to the car.

“Someone’s Scared.” Stephaniee pulled me into a motherly side hug before she lifted me into my seat at the front.

“I’m just new at this I've never really been out of my house much my parents didn't ever let me outside.” I sank back into the seat as much as possible to stop anyone from seeing my face. 

“Oh poor baby you don’t have anything to worry about sweetheart.” She seemed to think I was talking about going outside. It was true, I was never allowed outside until my parents got home. 

The engine was turned on, the doors locked themselves to prevent my escape, and we were off. A large red van was parked in my parent’s drive way as we slowly drove past, one of those trucks that people use to move loads of stuff around. I thought nothing of it, Mom and Dad never told me anything about what they were doing when I was a boy, that wasn’t going to change when I was a girl. 

We turned out of the cul-de-sac and onto the quiet little road that connected us to a bunch of other cul-de-sacs. It was a quiet little neighbourhood that we lived in, but the site of two more large red trucks parked alongside the road was starting to worry me. I saw that my Dad was lifting a stack of chairs into the back of one truck, while my mother was talking to one of the workmen beside the other truck. 

“Looks like someone’s moving.” Stephanie was quick to point out what my mind wasn’t telling me, the alarm bells were now going off. Stephanie didn’t stop to look, she just kept the car going down the road. The doors were locked and all I could was nervously look over my shoulder as the workmen continued to pack and more furniture into the trucks. 

Why would they move without telling me? Without knowing where I was? Did they even know I was gone? Did they care?

We arrived at the local supermarket after a 5-minute drive. I vaguely remembered going here with my mother when I was very young, but what I remembered more was feeling small and vulnerable when adults surrounded me. As I grew older, the supermarket became a much less scary place, but now… things are different. 

I was returning to the supermarket wearing girl’s clothes, holding hands with a stranger and contemplating what was going to happen after my parents had moved away. It had all happened so fast, we drove past my real house and saw my real parents loading our belongings into three large red trucks. 

Stephanie casually stated, “Someone’s moving” and continued to drive past, but her words were the last push needed to send my brain into super-ultra-panic-mode. The last couple of days I had waited patiently for a chance to escape my neighbour’s house, but Stephanie destroyed every chance I had. 

Even if Stephanie blocked every attempt I made to escape, I knew I would eventually find a way out. But after seeing those three red trucks loaded with all of our belongings, I had to start panicking. I did at least try to escape the car, but the automatic door locks had already gone off. 

I was too scared too make a more obvious effort to escape the car, as I would have to explain to Stephanie why my parents moving away was such a distressing thing. And I did not want to be locked in the car with her after outing myself as a boy. 

Stephanie did not even know my true gender, she was under the impression that I was an 11 year old girl called Courtney, whose parents had deserted her during the holidays. Stephanie had taken it upon herself to protect this 11-year-old orphan, meaning she was always nearby to make sure I never tried to get away. 

I can only hope that my parents are still home when we get back, so I can tell them I still exist. It would mean Stephanie would find out about the real me, but I was now willing to risk that, knowing that I’d be moving far away from her right away. 

I just had to endure a couple more hours pretending to be Courtney, and then I would have my final chance to escape. 

As we walked through the car park, I could tell these last few hours of being a girl were going to be incredibly uncomfortable. There was not one empty space in the parking lot, the place was going to be full. I clinged to Stephanie’s hand tighter than ever as we walked to the automatic doors of the supermarket, and she made sure I stayed close to her side. 

I was still hoping to go through this experience without being seen, but it was going to be hard not to bump into someone let alone not be noticed. The entrance was filled with adults and their children, all-trying to complete the weekly grocery shopping. There were also a couple of girls who looked about the same age as Kaitlyn, and I really hoped Stephanie wasn’t going to make me talk to them. 

Instead she pulled me through the entrance of the supermarket and grabbed one of the nearby shopping carts. I felt a weird sensation as warm air was blown around my legs and up my dress, making my whole body tingle. It was another new experience for me, feeling the air around my legs like that, but Stephanie kept pulling me along. She was probably used to that sensation by now, with all the dresses she wears.

“If anyone asks, you’re my daughter, alright dear?” It sounded like a rhetorical question, or like she was stating a fact rather than asking for my permission. 

“But you’re not my Mom.” I replied, I was willing to call her Mom to make her happy, but pretending she was actually my mother was going a bit far. Then again this whole thing has gone a bit far.

“I know honey, I know, but it will make it easier to explain if we run into anyone.” Stephanie began pushing the cart along the first aisle in the supermarket, frozen goods. If it weren’t for the incredibly girly faux fur jacket I was wearing, I would be one of those frozen goods. For once I was glad to be wearing something pink and fluffy. 

“Who are we going to run into?” I asked. I really didn’t think anyone would recognise us. I couldn’t remember anyone from my old school days that shopped here, so I was safe. With Suzanne however, I didn’t know where she worked or if she even had any friends. I never noticed her invite anybody to her house aside from Kaitlyn’s school friends, so I just assumed she was friendless.

Besides, if someone I knew did find us here, I’m certain they wouldn’t recognise me dressed like this. I’m not even sure Sophie would have recognised me, and she lives right across the street! 

“Some of my friends from work often shop here honey, and it would just be easier to say you’re my daughter instead of explaining who you really are, alright?” I had to agree with her, it would be easier than explaining I was actually an orphan. And much easier than explaining that I wasn’t an orphan girl at all, but a boy stuck pretending to be a girl.

My reply was to nod slowly, as it didn’t look like Stephanie was in the mood for an argument. I just kept reminding myself that this was over as soon as we got home, and that if we were recognised, it would be Stephanie left embarrassed and not me.

Stephanie was looking in every direction, in case one of her co-workers was nearby, as well as picking out various products and putting them in the shopping cart. She instructed me to hold onto the cart whenever she let go of my hand, in case anyone tried to kidnap me. She was growing more and more protective by the second, almost to the point where I thought I was going to have to sit in the cart itself, in one of the foldable seats that babies used. 

We continued down each of the aisles, picking up all the usual stuff. I watched as the shopping cart gradually grew to a point where I couldn’t even see through the cart. I wasn’t tall enough to look over it like Stephanie could, so I had no idea what was ahead of us. I could only find two positives from all this, I could now hide behind the shopping cart, and there was not enough room for Stephanie to put me in the baby seat. 

In a time like this it was really important that I looked for positives in everything…

Stephanie steered the shopping cart into an aisle lined from one end to the other with thousands of cereal boxes. Her eyes focussed on each of the different brands as we slowly passed by, rarely looking away for second. 

“Why don’t you stand up here and pick what you want?” Again it sounded like she was ordering me about instead of asking. With one gentle tug on my hand, I was standing in front of her, with the cart in front of me. 

“Up here, there you go.” She lifted me up so that my feet rested on the metal bar that ran from one side of the cart to the other. I held onto the handle to keep myself from falling back, but when Stephanie stepped closer and grabbed hold of the cart again, I knew I wasn’t going to be falling off. 

I felt her body pushing against my back, and her flowery scent was now more noticeable than ever. I felt the familiar sensation of being kissed on the head, making me feel even more uncomfortable, and there was no way of escaping it. 

I then had to point out some of the cereals that I liked in my previous life as a boy. Each box had different designs on it, I pointed to the more masculine looking box and Suzanne picked up the girly, feminine version of it. We ended up getting Princess Oats, Disney Stars & Animals, Little Mermaid Sea Biscuits and Coco Pops. 

Even after I’d selected the cereals that I wanted, Stephanie didn’t let me get down from the cart. She seemed to enjoy having me under her thumb like this, or to be more exact, under her breasts. 

She continued to push the cart along the aisle, casually glancing at the other brands that we didn’t see. I looked down the aisle and saw a shapely woman pushing her cart towards us, she looked about the same age as Stephanie and had long curly brown hair. We had passed many different people during our time in the supermarket, some had smiled at us and said hello before walking away, but this woman was even friendlier.

I tapped Stephanie’s hand to get her attention, and she looked straight at the woman. A bright smile engulfed Stephanie’s face as she recognised the woman immediately, the shopping cart suddenly started moving towards this mystery woman. Without telling me what to do or explaining who the woman was, Stephanie began a cheery conversation with what was to be the first of her many work friends that I would be meeting.

“Hi Jan.” Stephanie spoke first just as our shopping carts lined up side by side. 

“Hey Steph.” Jan seemed quite excited as she gave me a quick look over. “And who is this little cutie?” 

“This is Courtney, one of my daughters.” I felt Stephanie stroke the top of my head, as if she was proud to call me her daughter. 

I had no trouble giving Jan a shy and uncomfortable smile, as my discomfort levels were already over the limit. She continued to look at me as if she was waiting for me to speak, so I quietly said hello and waved, which was fast becoming my default way of greeting people. 

“Oh it’s great to finally meet you dear, your Mom talks about you and your sisters quite often. You must be the youngest of the three?” Jan asked as she examined me closely.

Three? Why would Stephanie say she has three daughters when she only has two?

“No, no, little Courtney is the middle child, even though she doesn’t look it, she’s…” Stephanie was about to say I was eleven, I knew it, and so I cut her off quickly and blurted out “Twelve” in attempt to restore some normality to my situation. It was only Stephanie that thought I was eleven, so I would only have to convince her that I was really twelve. I knew it was only a one-year difference, but I wanted at least one thing in Courtney’s life to be real. 

Stephanie made no obvious reaction to my sudden age growth, instead she continued the conversation as if it was no surprise at all.

“She’s two years younger than my eldest Kaitlyn, and four years older than my youngest Harpher.” Stephanie was making habit of speaking proudly whenever I was the topic of conversation, and every time she spoke of Courtney like that it was like another nail in my old life’s coffin. Without realising it, I was slowly becoming a real member of the Allison family.

“I hope to meet the other two some day.” Jan seemed quite eager to see the complete set of Allison ‘girls’ together. 

“Well Kaitlyn should be around here somewhere, I sent her to get some milk a while ago...” Stephanie was clearly starting to get worried. “Have you seen a girl about a foot taller than Courtney, with dark blonde hair?” 

“I know just who you mean, she was standing right outside with a big group of girls, holding a bottle of milk. I’m sure she’s still there.” Jan was quick to reassure my new ‘mother’ that none of her pups had gone missing. 

“Jan, could you look after Courtney for a bit, I have to go check on my eldest.” Before Stephanie had finished speaking, she had already lifted me off the shopping cart and placed me next to Jan, then knelt beside me to quietly whisper.

“Now dear, be good and don’t tell Jan who you really are, I wont be long.” My pretend mother kissed my cheek lovingly, yuck, and rushed off towards the exit. I was left there feeling more humiliated than ever, it was as if she was treating me like a baby, picking me up and kissing my cheek like that.

If only she’d left me alone, I’d of been able to make a break for it and run home, it wasn’t that far away. For now I was stuck with Jan, who was quick to move our shopping cart and myself to the side of the aisle, out of the way. At that point I didn’t know what to do, it was the best chance of escaping that I’d had in a while. I could just run away, since my fear of being outside dressed like a girl had quickly faded. 

The fact that nobody seemed to recognise me was both humiliating and helpful.

I knew I had to get home sooner rather than later, since my parents could of disappeared by now, but what if I ran home and there was nobody there? I would then have to convince Stephanie that I ran home for no particular reason, and there was no way she was going to believe that. I would eventually crack under the pressure and say who I really was. 

But if I outed myself at that moment, where would I be? 

Stephanie would probably throw me out of the house and I’d be nothing more than an orphan, since my parents had now disappeared without sparing a thought for their son. There were so many possible outcomes, so I ended up just standing beside this stranger, remaining silent whilst thinking things out over and over again. 

I looked up at Jan, who was effectively my babysitter for the next few minutes, to see that she was peering around the aisle nervously, never focussing on one thing. I could tell the awkward silence was torturing her. 

“So how do you know my Mom?” I asked politely. I guess I had to play along with Stephanie’s story as well as my own.

“Oh, well we work together in Chicago, hasn’t she said?” Jan looked quite relieved to now be talking. 

“Mom doesn’t really talk about work that much.” I was right, throughout my first few hours as Courtney, my pretend mother had at no point talked about her work. 

“Well we work together for a daily newspaper, you’re Mom is quite the reporter.” 

Jan slowly sat down on the edge of an empty shelf, probably sensing how tall she was compared to me. All I could think of saying was an unimpressive “Heh” since I knew not saying a word would just make this conversation even more awkward. 

“You know honey, we do have a special day coming up, where everybody brings their children to work, you should ask your Mom if you can come in with her.” Jan spoke excitedly, as if this was her one chance to see the three Allison daughters together in person. 

“Can Kaitlyn come?” I had to ask. I would definitely need her with me for that. 

“Of course she can, and Harpher too. Everyone at the office has been so looking forward to meeting Steph’s girls.” 

What exactly has Stephanie been telling people in her office? She can’t have mentioned any names, I mean Courtney didn’t even exist until last night. 

“I guess it could be fun.” I had never been to Chicago before, let alone a busy office, so it could really be fun for me at least. 
“Oh it will be dear, it’ll be like a birthday party, honestly.” Jan grinned at me. It sounded like her office was actually a nightclub, she was hyping it up so much. 

I didn’t really put much thought into going to Stephanie’s workplace, since I was still hoping to escape Courtney’s life when we got back home. But I knew that the longer we stayed here, the more likely it was that my parents had already left. I did manage to see inside one of those big red trucks, and it was quite close to being full, so I knew we didn’t have much time to get back. 

And standing here talking to Jan was not getting me back home any quicker, since the woman was quite fond of conversation. She described me as a little fashionista, and was particularly impressed by the fur jacket I was wearing. I had got quite a lot of looks from people because of this jacket, with most commenting on how cute I looked. I had a feeling that Stephanie had picked this jacket just so people would compliment her on raising such a cute daughter. 

I had to explain to Jan that the jacket actually belonged to my ‘sister’ Harpher, since I would never own something as girly as that jacket, even if I were a girl. But what really irked me was when Jan said, “You seem like the kind of girl who has a bunch of these jackets at home.” 

Did I really come across as girly as that? I mean, I knew I was already pretty good at pretending to be a girl, but for most of this trip I was just moping around waiting for it to end. Apparently I acted like a girl without even trying.

Stephanie eventually returned to us, with Kaitlyn right behind her holding that one bottle of milk that had caused us so much trouble. We said our goodbyes to Jan and continued doing our shopping, until Stephanie decided she could do the rest by herself and allowed Kaitlyn and me to meet her at the checkout later. Kaitlyn kept looking me up and down whilst smirking evilly, I honestly thought that she was in league with her mother in trying to humiliate me. We went and sat down in the small supermarket café as we waited for ‘our’ mother. 

“I love your outfit Court, pick it out yourself?” Kaitlyn was grinning from ear to ear, enjoying every moment of it. 

“No, ‘our’ mother picked it out for me” I replied. I hoped referring to her mother, as my own mother would scare her, just for some sort of revenge. 

“What’d you mean ‘our’ mother Court?” Kaitlyn’s face twisted with confusion. 

“Now I have to pretend to be your sister, as well as pretend to be a girl.” I said. I hated it even more when the words came from my own mouth. 

Kaitlyn started giggling as soon as I said ‘sister’ and found it quite hard to stop after that. I guess she didn’t know about the rather serious business of my parents moving away. 

“Stop giggling! This isn’t funny at all! I could be stuck like this forever!” I shouted at her, but in a whisper so as not to draw any attention. I mean that isn’t really something you’d normally hear in a café. 

“Don’t worry Court, as soon as we get home you’ll have a chance to escape and go back to being a boy, why don’t you just enjoy being my sister for a bit longer okay?” 

Kaitlyn was still having trouble containing her giggles, she had to cover her mouth every now and then just in case one suddenly popped out. 

“You don’t get it do you? My parents are moving away! Didn’t you see the three red trucks outside my house?” 

I kept a close eye on Kaitlyn’s face, and soon after I spoke I saw a wave of seriousness spread across her features. I noticed that her nails looked freshly polished as she rested her hands on the table in front of me. Was that what she doing this morning aside from buying milk? 

“I didn’t know… they must have arrived just after I left Court.” Kaitlyn sounded quite sincere. 

“Yeah, you left, so our plan was ruined and I had to spend the whole day with your mother. I hope you had fun getting your nails done and hanging with your friends whilst I had to sit in a bath and have some stranger wash my hair.” 

I wasn’t really an angry person at heart, but talking to Kaitlyn about my day was really pushing me over the edge. 

This on a day where I had been pushed over many edges.

I was about to cross my arms to show my pretend sister how angry I was, but Kirsty quickly grabbed my hand and squeezed it, much like her mother did.

“I’m so sorry Kaleb, I was just about to wake you up when Mom asked me to go pickup some milk. I couldn’t just say no to her, I had to go. And then when she phoned me to say you were both coming to the store later, I figured I would just wait here. The plan was really going to work, but Mom seemed determined to get me out of the house.” 

Kaitlyn continued her apologetic tone enough for me to believe her, but now I was just upset. It really seemed as if Stephanie was trying to keep me as a prisoner. 

“What am I going to do?” Well I honestly didn’t know what to do, every plan we made was quickly and easily brushed aside by the maternal monster that was Stephanie.

“I’m sure your parents will still be there when we get back, and if they’re not then you know you’ll always have me.” 

Kaitlyn squeezed my hand and looked deep into my eyes. This reminded me of those really dramatic moments in the movies just before the two characters kiss.

“Court since you’re my little sister now.” I groaned at her for ruining the moment, but Kaitlyn grinned playfully at me and I could not help but smirk back. I mean, if I was going to be stuck as girl, who better to have as my sister than my best friend. 

We sat in the café for a good ten minutes at least, waiting for ‘our’ mother to come through the checkout. Stephanie eventually turned around the corner, pushing a cart filled to the brim with plastic bags, whilst talking to what looked like Pam again. 

I quickly alerted Kaitlyn and nodded towards the two. 

“That’s Jan, she works with our Mom or… your Mom.” I whispered in her ear just as Stephanie and Jan got within earshot. Jan waved at both of us with an excited grin on her face, but I couldn’t think of what she was excited about. Stephanie stopped outside the café to wait for us, whilst Jan continued on and out the exit. Kaitlyn and I quickly evacuated our seats and the three of us quickly exited the supermarket, finally.

“Jan is coming over for some tea, so I want you both on your best behaviour.” Stephanie said it quite a strict sounding voice. Now it seemed like she was treating me as her daughter instead of as a guest, and I could tell she was enjoying it. 

“Wear something nice Kaitlyn, and find something for Courtney too.” 

Stephanie was planning some sort of fancy tea party, and it was probably going to be the girliest experience of my life. I just hope I wasn’t going to be there when it started. 

When we got to the car, Kaitlyn claimed the front passenger seat before I could, so I was pushed to the back seats. Now, Stephanie’s car had different coloured seat belts, so I was of course forced to use the pink seat belt. Stephanie buckled me in herself, making me feeling quite useless. If she knew I was a boy then I would probably be helping her put the shopping into the car, but I was stuck being treated like a delicate little girl for now. 

Stephanie came through on her promise to buy me some fake nails, the packet of which she threw to Kaitlyn in the front seat. 

“Kaitlyn dear, I bought those for your sister, would you mind?” 

Kaitlyn turned around in her seat gave me an apologetic look, it looked like she had no choice but to do what her mother asked. I lazily raised my hands up to her and whispered, “Just get it over with” because I just wanted to get home. Stephanie definitely wasn’t rushing. 

I was beginning to think that she somehow knew who I really was, since nobody takes this long to pack the shopping into the car. It was like she was in slow motion, just to punish me. If she did know I was a boy, then making me wait long enough for my parents to abandon me was probably the first of my punishments. 

Each nail that Kaitlyn applied was smooth, curved and distinctly pink. I should of known that my new mother would of picked out the most feminine fake nails there were, not the black ones, or the ones with skulls on them. 

“My Mom is really enjoying having you as her daughter.” Kaitlyn pointed out the obvious. 

“Are you jealous?” I grinned at her.

“Jealous that Mom has someone else she can dress up like a doll? No way.” Kaitlyn snickered and gave me a sarcastic pat on the head, was I the only one not enjoying this? 

We eventually drove home after what seemed like an age of waiting for Stephanie, who seemed to be unloading three shopping carts instead of one. I was so nervous as I sat there waiting to get home, but my usual nervous fidgeting was prevented every time I heard my new nails click whenever they touched something, or the sudden pain I felt whenever I clenched my fists. 

I could tell it was going to take a while to get used to having long nails like these. 

Other than holding the door handle the whole time, whilst nervously fidgeting as Kaitlyn and her mother talked about Bring Your Children to Work Day, the journey home was mostly uneventful. However, when we finally did reach the cul-de-sac, the three red trucks had disappeared and the driveway in front of my house was empty. 

As soon as the car stopped, I pulled on the door handle in the hopes of rushing out to see if anyone was still there, but the door did not budge. I had to wait for Stephanie to unbuckle herself and walk the long way around the car before she opened my door, unbuckled my pink seat belt and lifted me out of the seat. I wanted to argue with her to explain that I could have done all of that myself, but checking my house was my first priority. 

With Stephanie busy with unloading the shopping, I ran across the street to my real house and rang the doorbell, Kaitlyn was right behind me. I could tell she was as hopeful as I was that there was somebody home. We waited a minute before I rang the doorbell once again, but there was no answer. Kaitlyn then pushed past me and shouted through the small letterbox in the door, “Is anybody home?” but again there was no answer. 

For the next few minutes I rang the doorbell without an answer. When at last we did hear a reply, it was not one of my parents, but my fake mother Stephanie shouting from across the street.

“I don’t expect to do all this work myself, Girls!” 

I gave the doorbell one last push, but Kaitlyn grabbed a hold of my hand and gently pulled me back in the direction of her house, or rather, our house.

I found it terribly difficult to carry all those shopping bags into the house, not only because they were heavy but also because of the delicate fake nails that I now had to cope with. I was afraid of breaking them whenever I clenched my fist around one of the bag handles, but at the same time I feared for the bags safety because these nails were quite sharp. 

I didn’t spare much time to examine my new nails, as I hated every moment I spent looking at them. They had this strange effect of making my fingers look longer and thinner, more feminine than they had been before. 

Stephanie had offered me a brief ray of hope when she said I could stop using them if I wanted, but when she continued my heart sank again. 

“But only when your real nails grow back to a proper length, and then we can all go down to the nail salon, won’t that be fun?” Stephanie was speaking to the fridge as she packed various products onto the shelves. 

“Yes, Mom.” Kaitlyn and I said together as we put the last of the shopping onto the table. It seemed that my new sister was looking forward to that as much as I was.

Luckily I wasn’t the one who had to carry the most bags, and the job of looking after my nails without dropping the shopping was done long before I thought it would be. Kaitlyn informed me that her mother usually wasn’t that generous and often made her carry in all the shopping, whilst she herself did the job of putting everything into its correct place in the kitchen.

Kaitlyn quietly thanked me afterwards for making her job slightly easier. 

When we finished, the three of us split off to do what we wanted to. That normally happened in my house after we’d finished helping with the shopping. I would go up to my room and watch TV whilst Mom and Dad went about their own business, but now I was in a different house and with a different family. Stephanie had answered the phone and went off into the lounge, whilst Kaitlyn had gone back upstairs and into her room, leaving me in the kitchen. 

When I realised that this wasn’t my family and I had nothing to do by myself, I ran straight for the stairs. Stephanie was gossiping over the phone with someone who I could only assume was another woman, since they were quite loudly discussing the latest fashions and one prominent topic was what they were going to wear to some office party. 

I truly had no idea what girls talked about when there weren’t any boys around, since I never talked to any of the girls at school and the cul-de-sac girls rarely had their own private conversations. Even if they did, they would never reveal their secrets to the boys. 

But now that I was stuck pretending to be a girl, listening to Stephanie talking about all these girly topics made me realise that I might be stuck talking about the same things for the rest of my life. Surely girls talk about some sports, or the army, perhaps even space travel?

If I was going to talk about clothes, makeup, shoes, boys and the latest pop idol for the rest of my life, I might just pretend to be a mute. I would still have to listen to girls blabber on, but at least the words wouldn’t come from my mouth.

I darted up the stairs and into Kaitlyn’s room, where she was sitting at her vanity table playing with her silly makeup. On the table I could see the tube of sparkly purple lip-gloss that had gotten me into this mess in the first place, it was sitting comfortably on a pile of makeup products that Kaitlyn was using. 

“What are you doing? I thought we were going to finally escape?” It was a stupid question to ask, where would I go when I did escape?

“Where would you go if you escaped?” Kaitlyn said coolly whilst staring at me in the large mirror on the vanity table. 

I had no answer for her so I just shrugged. 

“Exactly.” Kaitlyn fluffed at her face with one of those huge makeup brushes, the end of which was covered in some light pink powder. 

She put the brush down for a moment and looked over her shoulder, looking right into my eyes. “I’m sorry to say this but your home is here now, as Courtney.” 

Kaitlyn turned back to her table and continued doing her makeup, something I hoped I would not be doing myself in the future. 

“My parents can’t just leave me.” I said petulantly. 

“No they can’t, it would be illegal or something, and so they will eventually come looking. Until that time, why don’t you enjoy being my sister for once, it can’t be so bad.” 

“It’s not being your sister that’s bad, it’s being a girl.” I muttered as I went and sat on Kaitlyn’s bed and turned on the TV. Beside me were two outfits neatly laid out side by side, both were fairly pink dresses. The first dress, closer to Kaitlyn rather than me, was a silky light pink material covered in a white floral pattern. The bottom of the dress seemed to flare out quite a bit, and the edge was lined with some sort of thin white lacy material. The second dress, the one closer to me, was actually black underneath but decorated with a pink squares all over. I didn’t know how else to describe it so I checked the label to actually find out what it was called. It would have been awkward if Jan asked what I was wearing and I struggled to explain what she thought were ‘my’ clothes. 

It was a ‘1960s Style Check Dress by Yumi’ apparently. 

I couldn’t help but think Kaitlyn had misunderstood Mum when she said, “Wear something nice.” 

I thought she just meant get changed and wear something different, since the clothes I had on seemed pretty nice to me. Then again I’m not exactly a fashion expert. 

“Isn’t this a bit much?” I said. If Kaitlyn was going to make me wear something like this when I didn’t have to, I had to stop her. 

“When Mom says someone’s coming over for tea, it really means we’re having a little garden party. You’ll learn that eventually.” She grinned at the mirror and started brushing her hair idly. 

“A garden party with just us and Jan?” I thought garden parties had more people than that. 

“Trust me sis, Mom will invite more of her friends, who do you think she’s talking to on the phone?” Kaitlyn said, as if reading lines from a script. This sort of garden party thing must happen quite often.

I stood up from the bed and walked to the window, standing beside Kirsty at her girly table filled with girly goods. I was hoping a quick look outside would show me some dark rain clouds coming in, or snow piled high in the garden, anything to stop a garden party from happening. But the sky was clear, the sun was shining and the grass in the garden was a vibrant green. Elegant white benches were waiting on the patio for a dozen ladies to come and sit on them. 

“How many people will come?” I asked. I figured 20 or so people couldn’t all speak to Stephanie at once, so the spares would have to talk to Kirsty and me. I didn’t want that. 

“Four or five of Mom’s co-workers.” Kaitlyn replied, she knew exactly what to expect. 

“They’ll all have tea in the garden together, we don’t have to join them. But we’re expected to say hello at some point.” 

“What if we don’t?” I asked.

“Then you can expect to be grounded by Mom.” 

“She’s not my Mom.” 

“Yes she is, at least for a couple more days. Now will you please get dressed?” Kaitlyn had briefly stopped doing her makeup and turned around in her chair to face me, so clearly saying that was quite important.

“Can’t I just wear this?” I motioned towards the black dress that I had been wearing most of the day. I had actually grown to like that outfit.

Kaitlyn firmly stated “No.” without really explaining why and then handed me the 1960s style dress, the one with a much more vibrant pink. 
I nodded meekly and slowly walked out of Kaitlyn’s room and into ‘my’ room, partly hoping that Kaitlyn would catch up to me and give me something less pink to wear. I slowly closed the door to my room, giving my sister some more time to come, but she didn’t. 

I moved a chair in front of the door once again and wedged it beneath the door handle, something I imagined I would be doing a lot more unless I wanted Stephanie to see my obviously male groin. 

The black dress looked easy enough to just pull off, but things were made much harder when I heard a loud knocking sound, like wood hitting wood, and was suddenly knocked over by a hard object. I collapsed onto the ground with the black dress pulled over my head and a wooden chair on top of me. It quickly dawned on me that the door had been opened and my attempt at locking it had failed miserably, much like all of my recent attempts to escape the house. 

I struggled to pull myself from under the chair, and when I eventually got to my feet I pulled the dress back down again so that it covered my crotch. When I looked up I was expecting to see Suzanne standing there in complete silence, with her face turning a deep dark red and steam shooting out from her ears. I had made that assumption based on the fact that whoever was standing there was completely silent, it could only of been a psychopathic Stephanie.

Once I successfully brought myself back to reality and actually looked up at the intruder, I found it was just Kaitlyn standing there. Her hand was covering her mouth as she struggled to hold in a quiet giggle, while her other hand was holding a flimsy black material that stretched down to the floor. 

“I thought you were Stephanie.” I said, exasperated.

“Mom is still downstairs silly. Nice panties by the way.” Kaitlyn let loose a little snicker. 

I nervously tugged my dress down a bit further, but it wasn’t needed. The white cotton panties underneath had stayed in place, and successfully flattened any bulges. If it was Stephanie that had barged in she wouldn’t have seen anything out of the ordinary, but it was still quite embarrassing. 
“You haven’t even started to get dressed! Is it such a hard thing to do?” 

Kaitlyn began berating me for being so slow to do what she claimed were ‘the simple things’ such as getting dressed and doing my hair and what not. I had to remind her that I wasn’t actually a girl and that all of this was incredibly hard to get used to, which she eventually agreed with. She decided it would be best if she did all the work and helped me get ready for our little garden party. 

“But what about you?” I asked, worried that I would be stopping her from getting herself ready.

“I’m finished already sis, little events like these don’t require that much work. When its time for the school prom however, you’ll be spending hours getting ready.” 
I examined Kaitlyn closely and she did indeed look quite ready, if not more than ready. She looked stunning in that light pink dress with the white flowers, with her hair tied back in a ponytail that draped itself over her shoulder. She only used a little makeup, but it still made her face glow like an angel. 

I used to have a crush on Kaitlyn when her family first moved into the cul-de-sac, it was the ‘pretty girl next door’ kind of thing for a couple of weeks before we started to get to know each other. Eventually my crush subsided and we became best friends, but seeing her dressed up like this brought that innocent attraction right back within minutes.

When I realised that I was still pretending to be her sister, I put those feelings away. I couldn’t just tell her how I felt, not in this situation at least. 

Kaitlyn rushed from my room to hers gathering a selection of shoes, clothes, accessories and lastly a see through bag filled to the brim with cosmetics. It was soon quite obvious that Kaitlyn was going to contradict herself and spend quite a while getting me ready for this ‘small’ event. I could only assume that she just wanted to spend more time treating me like her doll.
Each delivery she brought from her room made me feel that little bit more sick in the stomach, as I not-so-patiently waited for Kaitlyn to turn her makeup brushes on me.

My room was quickly changed from a little girl’s paradise to a teenage girl’s lair, with ‘facilities’ all around dedicated to making that teenage girl look pretty. I was instructed by Kaitlyn to pull off my dress and stand on top of a small pile of books in the center of the room, which brought me up to Kaitlyn’s eye level.

She took several moments to examine me on my pedestal like an artist looking at a blank canvas, while I could only wait anxiously for what she was going to do. To my left were several more dresses hanging on the edge of the wardrobe, each one more pink or yellow than the last. To my right were about 20 different pairs of girls shoes all lined up beside the bed, some with raised heels which looked quite terrifying, whilst some were flat but had bows, ribbons or flowers attached to make them equally as painful to wear. 

Another revelation was that Kaitlyn had rushed me for no reason, as it became obvious that the party was not for a couple of hours at least. I realised this when we had spend about an hour or two deciding which one of the dresses I was going to wear. Kaitlyn didn’t need to tell me that they were all either Harpher’s dresses, or Kaitlyn’s old ones. Each dress was for a girl of Harpher’s age and they were designed to make the wearer look like a princess, with the puffy and lacy skirts, thin waists and quite strange looking puffy shoulders. Some had ribbons that had to be tied in a bow at the back, while others came with long velvet gloves that almost covered the whole arm. 

I was forced into deciding to wear the original dress that Kaitlyn had picked out for me, the pink check dress that was now lying on Harpher’s bed. Kaitlyn gave me a relieved smile when I finally decided what to wear.

“Good, I was going to make you wear that anyway but now you’ve decided for yourself.” Kaitlyn gave me an evil smirk.

“Is there nothing else I can wear?” I asked, rather desperately. I still hoped I could wear the black dress with the flowers but Kaitlyn insisted on something different.

“Nothing else for this party, nothing that would fit you. You could wear my flower girl dress I wore for Mom’s wedding?” Kaitlyn asked, quite sincerely.

I shook my head, knowing that a flower girl’s dress would probably be girlier than any of the ones hanging to my left. 

When the decision was finally made to wear the pink check dress, I had moved to put it on myself, but Kaitlyn had held me in place on top of the pile of books and insisted that she follow through on her earlier decision to dress me herself. A condition of this was that I was not allowed to complain while she worked, and could only talk if it was important. 

I stood there obediently on the makeshift pedestal and raised my arms up when Kirsty commanded me to. She slowly lowered a soft velvety material over my head and let it drop over my body. It wasn’t the dress like I was expecting, but some sort of long vest which fell down to my to my mid-thigh, just about covering my groin. I decided not to ask what it was, in case I incited the wrath of Kaitlyn. 

I didn’t give the velvety vest much thought, because Kaitlyn was soon lowering the rougher material of the check dress over my head. It felt like some sort of wool or fur or something I couldn’t describe, but whatever material it was it was better than the multitude of princess dresses waiting nearby. 

The dress fit me quite well, and was surprisingly comfortable, combined with the warm leggings and the velvety vest I was already wearing. Kaitlyn adjusted some of the fastenings to make the dress fit even better, constantly tugging on the bottom of the dress until she was satisfied.

“Comfortable?” She asked.

“I guess so, yeah.” I replied. The honest truth, I had never felt more comfortable in girls clothing during my short time as a girl. Apart from the colour, it was far better than the black dress.

Thankfully, I didn’t have to stand in one place for very long. Kaitlyn spent a couple of minutes fidgeting with the dress, flicking my hair this way and that before she finally told me to sit down on the edge of the bed. 

After standing for so long, it was such a relief to be sitting on something comfortable whilst Kaitlyn did all the work. She sat down on the floor in front of me, with the huge selection shoes either side of her, and politely asked me to raise my feet. I did so expecting to feel some girlish shoe slipped onto my feet, but that was the complete opposite of what I felt.

It was instead a tugging feeling, the feeling of leggings slowly being put on me. 

I couldn’t hold my tongue, so I blurted out to Kaitlyn, “What are you doing? I don't have hair on my legs remember!” 

Kaitlyn gave me a thoughtful look and then a slow nod.

“Yes, I know, I’m just putting these cute tights on you. Don’t worry.” She continued.

“What if Stephanie comes in?” I continued, but Kaitlyn pressed her manicured forefinger against my lips to silence me like a child. Without replying she gave my leggings one last tug and pulled them off, tossed them aside and walked to the chest of drawers near the door. 

Still without uttering a word, she pushed the chest of drawers in front of the door, effectively blocking it. It was much better than my stupid chair beneath the door handle plan, this was certain to stop anyone from coming in. Kaitlyn then sat down and grabbed the long, flimsy black item that she had come in with. 

“Better?” she asked.
She pressed her finger to my lips just as I was about to reply, then said, “Nuhuhuh, remember our rule.” 

I gave her an annoyed grunt and crossed my arms, whilst she raised my feet again and started to pull the black flimsy object up my feet and up to my ankles.

So that’s what they were, tights. I watched curiously as the smooth nylon material stretched up my legs. It was much thinner than the leggings I was previously wearing, but no matter how much it stretched it still remained black and opaque. I couldn’t see any of my skin through the material, it was pretty cool. 
“Tonight, we’ll do it tonight.” Kaitlyn said.

“Do what?” I asked. I wondered if she meant escape, but that plan was still on hold until we found my parents.

“Look, its summertime Courtney, My mom will get suspicious if you refuse to show your legs. Besides, if she did see your peach fuzz legs I don’t think she’d realise what you really are. She would just end up shaving your legs herself.” Kaitlyn said.

“Your legs were going to be shaved either way, so would you rather we did it or My mom did?” 

“What do you mean ‘we’?” I asked suspiciously.

“You think I’d trust you with a razor? You haven’t even started shaving.” Kaitlyn had the right of it. 

I nodded meekly at her and listened as she came up with a plan whilst simultaneously pulling the tights up my thighs before they finally reached my waist. 

“We’ll stay up late tonight, just until My mom goes to bed. I’ll knock on your door and then get the shaving things. When you hear me knock, sneak into my room and wait for me. Don’t make any loud noises.” Kaitlyn said as she pulled me up from the bed and made me hold up the hem of my dress, whilst she adjusted the tights around my waist.

“Why do we have to do it in your room and not the bathroom?” I asked, thinking that most people shave in bathrooms.
“Its to risky.” She said. “My mom will eventually hear us in the bathroom. I just have to quickly sneak in and get the stuff, then sneak out.” 

“But why your room?” I asked.

“Look, last night did you hear anything through the wall, in my room?” she asked. I wasn’t sure how it was relevant but I shook my head. “No, why?” I asked.

“Exactly.” Kaitlyn grinned.

She pushed my hands aside, so that the dress fell back down.

“You couldn’t hear anything because the walls in my room are really thick. I was watching TV for hours and neither you nor my mom could hear it. So my mom isn’t going to hear us tonight unless we start shouting. Now, no more questions, just remember the plan.” 

Once again we had conceived a plan, and when all other plans before had failed, I wasn’t so sure this one was going to do much better. It seemed much less risky than our escape plans, the consequences of being caught were nowhere near as bad. The thought of having my legs shaved by Stephanie was enough encouragement to agree with this latest plot.

I was instructed to sit back down on the bed and await Kaitlyn as she selected my shoes, and I sat down without complaint. I couldn’t stop thinking about my leg hair, a strange thing to be obsessing over. As soon as we had come up with a plan to get rid of it, I couldn’t help but notice the feeling of the nylon tights rubbing against my semi-hairy legs. I had rarely been aware of the hair on my legs before but now I was more aware of it than ever, it was like every single hair was shouting at me, “Don’t let me go!” 

Kaitlyn made me try on several shoes before she was happy. Every pair was Harpher’s and they all fit me perfectly, which was satisfaction enough for me but not Kaitlyn. She kept on blabbering about the style of the shoe, and how it fit with the outfit. Several times after trying on a pair of shoes, she would say, “This doesn’t fit” as if it was some sort of puzzle piece.

Honestly, a simple pair of sneakers is good enough for me. Girls make things too complicated.

We, or rather she, narrowed the selection down to three. They were all the sort of shoes that the girls wore to school. Glossy black leather, t-bars, bars and buckles, flowers and bows, that sort of thing. I didn’t care which one I had to wear as long as it was comfortable, but Kaitlyn allowed me the final decision to pick which one I wanted.

I would of just randomly pointed my finger at a pair, but I decided to pick the pair of flat black shoes with a bow over the toes. Kaitlyn described it as a ballerina shoe and that it was a good pick, but I just picked it because it was somehow the least girly looking of the three.

The last step, or the last ‘station’ as I had come to think of it after being shepherded through clothes and shoes, was the vanity table. After seeing Kaitlyn sit at her vanity table for ages, and after watching my mother at her own vanity table back home, I had come to think of it as a place that only girls were allowed to sit. 

As Kaitlyn ushered me towards the small pink cushioned chair, it became an incredibly daunting object, as if sitting on that chair in front of that table filled with hairbrushes and a vast supply of Kaitlyn’s makeup would be the point of no return.

My paranoid mind had decided for me that if I sat at the table, I would be a girl, end of story.

It was much comfier than I expected, the cushion was quite soft and well…cushiony, since Harpher had been away at camp and hadn’t sat on it in a while. Looking at the mirror though, it would of looked like Harpher was back and sitting down exactly where I was sitting. We had striking resemblance, Harpher and me, almost to the point where she was considered the female version of me, and I was the male version of her. The similarity was slightly more obvious now when my hair was long, silky and smooth.

There were still enough differences to make it clear to me that I was –not- Harpher, for example my blue eyes to her brown ones, her slightly larger nose, my brunette hair to her blonde locks.

My penis to her… you know.

A part of me wondered if Stephanie was keeping me under her thumb because it was like having Harpher back. She had referred to me as either Kaitlyn or Harpher quite a few times during my stay, but I thought it was just accidental. I began to fear that she was somehow trying to turn me into Harpher, soon she would dye my hair blonde, replace my nose and eyes, and remove my penis…

“Kaitlyn!” I blurted out. I could see her in the mirror, standing behind me with a hairbrush in her hand.

She jumped at the sudden sound of my voice. “What?” she asked, whilst holding a hand to her chest to recover from the scare.

“Do you think your Mom is trying to turn me into Harpher?” I asked as I turned my head around to her.

“Don’t be silly Courtney.” Kaitlyn said with a grin on her face. She placed her hands either side of my head and forcefully turned me to look at the mirror. Once she had me in place, she began brushing through my hair thoroughly.

“I mean it, don’t I look like Harpher now more than ever?” I said.

“I guess so, but what has my mom done? So far it’s only been me that’s changed you.” Kaitlyn said.

It was true, Stephanie hadn’t done anything yet except make me stay in her house and wear fake nails, plus the Minnie Mouse pyjamas and the forced hair wash. Kaitlyn was the one who forced me into being a girl, she was the one who was deciding what I wore and what we did.

“Are you trying to turn me into Harpher?” I looked up at Kaitlyn in the mirror as she busied herself with my hair.

“Trust me, Courtney, the longer Harpher is away at camp, the better. You have no idea how annoying she can be at home.” Kaitlyn said.

“You don’t want her back?” I asked.

“Well of course I want her back, silly, she is still my sister. But she’ll only be back at the end of the holidays, when school starts. During school time I won’t have to see her that much, so that’s good.” 

I nodded slowly. Talk of things happening at the end of the summer was starting to freak me out, what if I was still stuck here when summer ended?

“Kaitlyn, what will happen if I’m stuck here when you go back to school?” I asked.

“Depends on your parents and the police really, I’m sure they’ll pick you up soon.” Kaitlyn said as she knelt down to the wall and turned on one of the plug sockets, then stood back up and placed the hairbrush back on the vanity table. I followed the wire leading from the plug socket and it came to some strange looking tongs sitting in front of me.

“Are you sure you want them to come back?” she asked.

“I… think so.” I said. I wasn’t really sure if I wanted my parents back, but I knew that I’d be a boy again if they did come back.

“You always complain about how they treat you.” Kaitlyn said as she then picked up the strange looking tongs and fiddled with some of the buttons on it. 

“When they come back, I can be a boy again. I don’t care how they treat me.” I said stubbornly.

“Just think about it Courtney, you’ve had more fun in this home than you’ve ever had at your old home.” Kaitlyn pushed the strange tongs closed around a couple of locks of my hair, giving my ears a quiet sizzling sound to listen to. I felt a faint sense of heat at the top of my head, which disappeared as Kaitlyn pulled the tongs away. 

She continued using the tongs, ‘straighteners’ as Kaitlyn later described them, on every lock of hair that I had. If my hair wasn’t already straight, it was now. The effect of the heat seemed to make my hair appear completely straight, smooth and shiny from root to tip. Kirsty ran her fingers through my hair over and over, pushing locks over that shoulder, that ear, tying them up, pinning them this way and that, before she went back to square one and let my hair hang loose. 

She grabbed a black hair band from her box of accessories and placed it on my head. Kaitlyn pushed most of the hair on my left behind my ear, whilst the hair on my right was allowed to flow down my shoulder, all kept in place by the pink hair band that came with a large pink bow attached to make me look like I was somehow gift wrapped.

“Now to put your face on.” Kaitlyn said as she switched off the hair straighteners and turned my chair slightly, so that she could stand in front of me and do my makeup.

“Do I have to wear that stuff?” I whined at her.

“You’ve let me dress you from head to toe and style your hair, why stop me now?” she asked.

“I just don’t like all that stuff.” As my words came out I started to sound more and more like a baby.

“Stop being a baby, I’m only going to use a little bit. It’s not like I’m going to make you look like Kim Kardashian or Snooki.” Kaitlyn had that smirk on her face that meant I couldn’t really trust her on that.

“Just close your eyes and I’ll tell you when you’re ready.” Kaitlyn said as she sat down on the edge of the vanity table, with a pile of cosmetics at her side. I gave her a suspicious look but it didn’t phase her one bit, she simply smiled and pulled my eyelids closed with her middle finger and index finger.

“Will it hurt?” I asked nervously.

“Did it hurt when I put that lip-gloss on you?” she replied with another question.

“No, but…” I wanted to say that it did kind of hurt because she was on top of me at the time, but Kaitlyn placed her finger on my lips to shut me up.

“Shush.” She said. “Now let me work.” 

Kaitlyn didn’t go back on her word at all, she only spent about ten minutes painting my face. It wasn’t the hour of feeling slimy stuff smeared on my lips, or brushes prodding on my eyelids, or struggling not to giggle when a particularly ticklish brush was used under my chin. Kaitlyn spent about five minutes applying some sort of powder all over my face using a large brush. She repeatedly used the words ‘foundation’ and ‘powder’ because, as she had said, eventually I would be doing this myself.

Next I felt the familiar feeling of something being dragged across my lips, it wasn’t the lip-gloss from before but something more solid. Kaitlyn called it lip balm, and that it somehow made my lips look healthier and smoother without using lip-gloss. Kaitlyn claimed it was an essential item for any girl as they moved into their teens, so she forced me to carry the small blue tube of lip balm wherever I went in the future, including the small garden party that we were going to have.

The hardest part of my little makeover was when Kaitlyn did my eyes. She had casually picked up a black tube, unscrewed the top and raised the brush slowly to my eye. I instinctively dodged her by jolting my head to the side, and from that point on it was a struggle for both of us. Kaitlyn had done this herself so many times, but now that someone was being so uncooperative with her, she couldn’t stop herself from showing her anger.

“Stay still!” she shouted. It wasn’t like a raging lunatic shout, just an angry or irritated raised voice shout. Even so, it still made Stephanie come rushing up the stairs to knock on the door.

“Girls? Girls? Is everything alright in there?” Stephanie asked anxiously.

“Yes!” Kirsty and I shouted back. We hoped our combined voices would be powerful enough to reassure Stephanie.

“What was that shouting about?” Stephanie asked. She spoke slowly and carefully, as if she was buying time until the police arrived to ram the door down.

“We were playing Tag…” I said in nervous voice, thinking that the words “Stay still” would often be said when playing Tag.

“With mascara…” Kaitlyn added. It was a few moments before Stephanie replied.

“Playing Tag in such a small room… Girls, what’s going on in there?” Stephanie began to turn the door handle, “I’m coming in.” 

“NO!” Kaitlyn shouted whilst I nervously backed away into the corner.

The shouting and rejection only seemed to encourage Stephanie more, she turned the door handle and pushed the door into the back of the chest of drawers that we had used to block anyone from trying to get in, or out.

“Why is this door blocked? Girls! Open this door!” She shouted.

Stephanie continued to struggle with the door, Kaitlyn stood her ground whilst I knelt down behind the vanity table chair, fearing a beating of some kind.

“Is there a boy in there? Are you hiding a boy in there?” Stephanie was getting angrier with every push she gave the door. Eventually she had pushed the blockage far enough to open the door slightly, but she could only see Kaitlyn from the angle.

“KAITLYN JUNE ALLISON! OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW!” Stephanie screamed at her daughter.

Kaitlyn knew there would be hell to pay if she didn’t open the door now, her mother had just used her full name when she rarely did. She took several quick and small steps towards the door and pushed the chest of drawers aside. Kaitlyn had an ashamed look on her face, and she kept looking down at her feet to avoid eye contact with her mother.

Stephanie burst into the room as soon as she could, without uttering a word but her face growing redder by the second. She began to search the room for this intruder, checking beneath the bed, under the sheets, in the cupboard, behind the door, but she found nothing. When she turned to me, I feared the worst. Stephanie walked up to me, but her expression quickly calmed from psychopath back to caring mother.

“Courtney, darling. Do you mind?” Stephanie looked past me and at the vanity table, but I still had no idea what she meant. Kaitlyn stepped to my side, grabbed me by the arm and pulled me out of her mother’s way.

Stephanie bent over and leaned on the small chair that I had been hiding behind, she checked the small space beneath the table and again found nothing. She turned back to Kaitlyn and I and waited for an explanation, but all we could do was smile shyly at her.

It was then that I realised that we actually didn’t have anything to hide from her. I mean, before she would of seen my hairy legs but not now, not when they were encased in silky nylon tights. I guess we just got scared, when Stephanie started shouting we must of assumed she knew something was happening, so we tried our best to stop her from getting in.

“You girls are just too adorable. I know you’re up to something, I don’t know what it is but I’ll soon find out.” Stephanie bent down and gave both of us kisses on the forehead, before she rested her head between Kaitlyn and I and gave us one big hug. Her raging bull moment was over now and she was back to being the lovely and caring Stephanie.

“The ladies will be over in about half an hour, and it looks like there will be two well dressed girls here to greet them.” Stephanie nodded to herself and gave us a proud smile.

“I’ve invited Emily’s mother to come Kaitlyn, so you might want to say hello to her ahead of your sleepover.” Stephanie stepped into the doorway and gave us one last smile before she headed downstairs. “I will Mom.” Kaitlyn said in a nervous voice, she was still recovering from being shouted out. 

Stephanie was always a very caring and loving lady, but now I knew that I should never push her buttons like that ever again.

“Who’s Emily?” I asked her.

“My best friend, from school. My mom knows her mom from work.” Kaitlyn nodded slowly.

“And you’re having a sleepover?”

“Oh don’t worry about that, you’ll be long gone and living as a boy by the time that sleepover comes about.” Kaitlyn said.

Kaitlyn closed the door to the room and left it unblocked after I explained that we had nothing to hide. We both took a while to calm down after that, before I was once again seated at the vanity table and Kaitlyn was holding the mascara. She was much more patient this time as we continued to struggle with my nervous dodges and blinking. 

Kaitlyn eventually had to hold my head in place with one soft hand whilst the other hand was stuck to the other side of my face, holding the mascara in front of my eye. She instructed me to blink, so that my eyelashes would brush the mascara instead of the other way round. Kaitlyn decided it was the only way that she could put mascara on me, at least until my eyes got used to seeing something coming so close to blinding them.

The thought of my eyes getting used to mascara added another load of fear to my ever-growing supply. The feeling of that extra weight on my lashes was annoying at first, I just couldn’t stop thinking about it, and how different it was to everything else. All the other makeup was hardly noticeable to me, but the mascara was always so obvious.

Following a fresh dose of coconut perfume, I was ready. Kaitlyn led me back into her room and stood me in front of one of her full-length mirrors. I stared at myself for a while, examining every inch of myself until I was satisfied, but I couldn’t get comfortable whatever I tried.

Yes, the clothes were incredibly comfortable, but every time I looked at myself it was like my identity was just disappearing. It was like I was really Courtney and the imaginary person was Kaleb, to boy who used to live next door.

I gave my reflection a shrug and pouted, something I had started to develop after acting like a girl for this long. Whenever I was sad about something I couldn’t help but pout.

I stuffed my hands in my pockets, only to find that I could only fit my fingers into the pockets. I fidgeted with my appearance a couple of times, standing this way and that, putting my hands by my sides, in my pockets, behind my back, but nothing seemed to look right. Eventually I just stuffed my fingers into my pockets, let my arms go limp and gave the mirror a displeased huff.

Kaitlyn stepped closed and wrapped her arms around my chest, her head resting on my shoulder. She smiled at my reflection, an obvious ploy to get me to smile back but I could only manage to give her a tiny smirk.

“What will make my little sister happy?” she asked.

“My old life back.” I said, sounding on the verge of tears.

“If you have fun tonight, will you promise to stop being so sad and start enjoying being Courtney?” Kaitlyn asked. She withdrew her hands from around me and picked up something gold and shiny from her desk.

“I guess I can try.” I said, whilst watching Kaitlyn suspiciously in the mirror.

“Good.” Kaitlyn said as she appeared behind me again. She lowered a thin golden necklace over my head, her manicured nails tickled the back of my neck as she clipped the two ends of the necklace together. Hanging from the necklace was a small, delicate golden heart, which Kaitlyn adjusted to sit perfectly at the bottom of my neck.

Kaitlyn checked me over one more time, moving my hair back and forth before she finished and placed her hands on my shoulders, giving them a gentle squeeze.

“I guess we’re ready” she said. Kaitlyn took hold of my hand and pulled me out of her room.

As soon as we got downstairs Stephanie had pushed us into service, there was definitely no chance of just coming down to say hello. Kaitlyn and I had to carry out trays of biscuits to the garden, until the round table on the patio was filled with little treats, cups and saucers and pots of milk.

Stephanie had placed five matching chairs around the table, so the benches were left scattered around different ends of the garden. I felt a little bit better when I realised that five chairs would not be enough for Stephanie’s friends, Kaitlyn, and myself, so I knew we wouldn’t have to sit with a bunch of ladies drinking tea. 

Only when I got a brief break from carrying trays, I was able to catch Stephanie rearranging the chairs in the lounge. She had brought in some extra chairs so that the whole TV was surrounded, it was definitely enough to seat everybody including the two daughters.

We still had a couple of minutes before any guests were due to arrive, so Stephanie allowed us to sit down and watch TV in the lounge until the first guest appeared. She also forbid us from going back upstairs, preventing us from running off should Stephanie want us to sit down with her. Kaitlyn explained that because of my presence, Stephanie had decided that she was going to ‘show off’ her daughters.

“Because of me?” I asked.

“Well not because of you personally, but because you being here means Mum has two daughters to show.” Kaitlyn said.

“My mom had a small gathering a couple of weeks ago, just after Harpher had gone to camp. I was the only daughter that was still at home and all I had to do was say hello and wave, before I could go back upstairs and watch TV until it was over.”

“I still don’t get it, why do I change anything?” I asked her.

“Its some sort of rivalry she has with her friends, a girly thing. Like, all of her co-workers have at least one kid, so showing off one kid isn’t, you know, cool.” She said.

“But showing off two kids, even three when Harpher gets back, that is definitely cool. Cool among her friends, at least. It’s the same sort of thing with girls at school, with shoes or purses, bags or dresses. You’ll soon find out that girls can be like that.” Kaitlyn finished just as the doorbell rang.

We both rushed to our feet and looked out through the large window in the lounge, to see that there was only one new car parked outside. Kaitlyn turned me to face her and then went through some basic things such as what to say and what to do. I was to place my hands on my lap when I was sitting down. If drinking something I would only take small sips. If forced into a conversation I would speak gently, giggle when appropriate and always remember my manners. 

“If you start to struggle, just look around the room at what everyone else is doing and try to copy them. The ladies will find you to be quite cute if they think you’re trying to take after them. If you cant do that, just sit quietly, say little so they’ll just think you’re young and shy, and let my mom put her arm around your shoulders and boast about how adorable you are.” Kaitlyn gave me a big hug as if to fill me with confidence.

“What about you?” I asked.

“Were you listening to me? I know all of this stuff already sis. I’ll be fine. All of my mom’s co-workers know me, apart from Jan who you met today. You wont have to worry about me at all, alright?” Kaitlyn was quick to comfort me. “I’ll be right next to you if you need help.” 

After the pep talk, Stephanie instructed us to wait in the doorway whilst she opened the door. My ears became filled with ecstatic hellos, kisses on the cheeks and the jingling of jewellery when the two co-workers hugged. 

“I was so glad to be invited over Steph, thank you. So why weren’t you at work today, huh?” said a jolly voice from the doorway. She was yet to step inside the house so I still couldn’t see who it was, I knew at least that it didn’t sound like Jan.

“Come in, come in.” Stephanie said cheerily. “I’ve been looking after my daughter for the day. I did phone in you know.” 

A rather chubby woman, about the same height as Stephanie stepped through the door. She was dressed in a smart blue business suit, and I could hear the sound of her fashionable black heels clicking on the floor. It was a familiar look that my Mom had always worn to work. This woman must of come straight from her office in town.

“You must remember my darling Kaitlyn?” Stephanie directed Kaitlyn to step forward.

The chubby businesswoman stepped forward and gently took Kaitlyn’s hand in her own. She didn’t shake it, but she simply held it gently whilst she smiled at Kaitlyn with her overly painted red lips.

“So good to see you again Kaitlyn, how have you been since we last met?” She asked politely.

“Very good thank you Mrs. Johnson, how are you?” Kaitlyn gave the woman a giddy girlish smile.

“After seeing you, better than ever.” Mrs. Johnson laughed. Kaitlyn gave me a nudge in the arm and we both forced a giggle, Kaitlyn’s giggle was louder than mine.

Mrs Johnson turned to me and stepped closer.

“This is my second eldest, Courtney. Courtney this is Mrs. Johnson, one of my friends from work.” Stephanie informed me. She seemed slightly uncomfortable having Mrs. Johnson so close to her daughters, her look then made me uncomfortable.

Mrs. Johnson began to raise her hand to mine, I smiled shyly and held the woman’s hand just as Kaitlyn had done. Her hand felt oddly slimy, so that explained why I could see Kaitlyn rubbing her hand against the wall in the corner of my eye.

“Very nice to meet you Mrs. Johnson.” I forced myself to give her a more confident, shining smile. Kaitlyn had told me to make a good first impression with the ladies.

“What a delight it is to finally meet you, little one. Why has your mother kept such a beauty from our eyes?” Mrs. Johnson grinned down me. The overwhelming smell of her perfume filled my nose, and it was such a disgusting smell that it almost made me throw up.

I gave the woman an uncomfortable shrug and was about to mumble out some sort of answer, but Stephanie interjected.

“Courtney likes to spend a lot of time with her friends from school, don’t you dear?” she said.

I nodded slowly to confirm the story.
“Ah, another little miss popular just like her big sister. I should have known.” Mrs. Johnson snickered.

I realised that Stephanie had probably used the same excuse to explain why her friends rarely got to see Kaitlyn and Harpher alone.

“I look forward to hearing a little more from you later, Courtney.” Mrs. Johnson finally let go of my hand and was led away by Stephanie. The two ladies got into a conversation of their own and there was no sign from Stephanie to follow, so Kaitlyn and I were able to sit back down. I too found myself rubbing my hand on the wall to get rid of the weird slimy stuff. Kaitlyn gave me a wicked smirk.

“It’s just hand cream. She has really rough hands, but she doesn’t know how to take care of it.” Kaitlyn snickered as she thought about it.

“Mom looked really uncomfortable when she got close to me…” I said.

“Oh yeah, I noticed. Mrs Johnson isn’t really one of my mom’s friends, she’s really her boss. One of her bosses.” Kaitlyn said.

“So she’s playing nice?” I asked. My dad had brought his boss home for some dinner a couple of times, to help him get a promotion that he never ended up getting.

“I guess she is, yeah.” Kaitlyn crossed her arms and pondered what her mother was doing with Mrs Johnson.

Stephanie came in to say that Mrs. Johnson and herself would be having tea in the garden, and instructed us to greet the next arrivals and lead them through to the garden to join the other ladies. We were able to watch about five minutes of The Simpsons before the next guest arrived. 

She was a tall and slender woman with golden blonde hair who looked to be in her mid twenties at least. She was wearing a large pair of sunglasses, which she raised up and wedged on top of her head when we opened the door. Kaitlyn knew her has Catherine since they had met before and had actually gone shopping together with Stephanie. Catherine was one of the newer employees at the newspaper and worked at the fashion desk, close to where Stephanie worked. Kaitlyn introduced me just like Stephanie had done before, and I said hello shyly just as I did with Mrs Johnson. Catherine was a much more comfortable person to be around with, and eventually I found myself having quite a fun conversation with her about some of the office politics that were going on.

Apparently the women that Stephanie had invited were all trying to impress Mrs Johnson enough to select their stories instead of the stories of a rival group of women on the other side of the office. With this little garden party, Stephanie’s group was sure to gain Mrs Johnson’s favour, Catherine said. When the conversation died down, Catherine arranged to take all three of us shopping, with Suzanne’s permission. Catherine liked to boast that working at the fashion desk allowed her a large sum of money to spend on buying clothes. Kaitlyn was definitely the more excited of the two of us. 

We led Catherine through to the garden and immediately sat back down to watch the Simpsons, but the doorbell rang once again just as our bums hit the couch. The next lady to arrive was Mrs Woods, Emily’s mother. She was essentially a black haired version of Stephanie. Tall, smooth skinned, curvy, in her mid to late thirties and jet black hair that was gathered behind her head and pinned loosely in place by a hair clip that looked not so different from a torture device. 

Mrs Woods was much less gossipy that Catherine, but she still talked calmly and greeted the both of us. She acted just like Stephanie did when she was around children, calling them dear or darling and making all of their movements and words seem incredibly gentle. After a brief conversation about the sleepover planned in a couple of weeks, Mrs Woods decided to invite me along, saying it would be unfair for Kaitlyn to go and for me not to. I retained the hope that I would be a boy again by then, but still accepted the invitation. Kaitlyn had made it clear to always be polite and say what the ladies wanted you to say, so I figured Mrs Woods wanted me to say yes.

Kaitlyn explained that Mrs Woods and Stephanie were quite close friends, and had met each other at a parents evening in the school. At the time Kaitlyn and Emily were already good friends, but when their mothers started to see more of each other after Mrs Woods moved to the same newspaper as Stephanie, they had all become best friends.

Last to arrive was Jan, whose face immediately lit up at the sight of Kaitlyn and me standing in front of her. Kaitlyn had told me that Jan had never been to one of Stephanie’s garden parties before, so that was enough to explain her ecstatic mood that just seemed to ‘turn on’ once we opened the door. 

Jan asked Kaitlyn and I to stand beside each other, arms around one another, so that she could see us ‘just as she imagined it in her head.’

“Your mother has told us all so much about you, but she never said how cute you looked together.” Jan grinned. 

Probably because we’ve never been together until now, I thought.

For once it was Kaitlyn that had to introduce herself to a stranger instead of me, and I found quite a lot of enjoyment in watching her make uncomfortable small talk with Jan just like I had to at the supermarket. Eventually Jan knew us both equally enough to finish off the conversation, so we led her through to the garden and gave ourselves a well-earned break. 

The episode of the Simpsons that we had been watching had finished just as we greeted Mrs Woods, so Kaitlyn forced me to watch a rerun of Kim Possible on the Disney channel. I used to enjoy the show quite a lot when it was originally airing, so I guess it wasn’t so bad. 

Funny enough it was the episode where Kim and Ron switch bodies. Ron was enjoying his time as a girl much more than I was.

“You did well sis.” Kaitlyn playfully nudged my shoulder.

“Thanks.” I said, not taking my eyes off the TV.

“I think we made some of them jealous.” Kaitlyn said.

“How?” I asked. 

“By being Mommy’s two darling daughters.” Kaitlyn giggled.

“I guess it was kind of fun.” I couldn’t help but smile. It felt oddly satisfying to make someone jealous like that.

The Disney channel was showing reruns of Kim Possible for the next few hours, so we found ourselves watching it over and over. About two hours or so after we had led Jan into the garden to join the others, the conversation that the ladies were having began to get louder. Stephanie led them in through the conservatory and into the kitchen where they all got another cup of tea. We knew it was only a matter of time before they all came in and sat around the TV in the arranged chairs, but they weren’t going to be watching the TV unless they enjoyed the cartoons. 

I thought Catherine might enjoy Kim Possible, but maybe not the other much older ladies.

“I’ve got an idea, take off your shoes, and then put your legs up on the couch.” Kaitlyn said when all the ladies were out of view, chatting in the kitchen as Stephanie made them more tea.

I followed her instructions and kicked off my shoes, then lifted my legs up so that my knees pointed to the roof.

“Not like that!” Kaitlyn whispered. “Sit so they cant see up your dress!”

I nodded quickly and readjusted my legs so that my knees bent and pointed towards the TV, with my feet touching the back of the couch. It was a position where I couldn’t help but lean towards Kaitlyn, but apparently that was what she planned. She copied my positioning exactly and pretty soon we were leaning against each other, clutching two soft pink cushions to our chests.

Kaitlyn changed the channel from Disney to Animal Planet, and we found ourselves watching a pack of lions play with their cubs and fight one another. Kaitlyn and I never took our eyes off the TV, but I caught a few smiles directed at us as the ladies began to move into the lounge and sit down.

I swear I heard someone whisper, “Steph has such adorable daughters, do you think she’ll notice if I take one of them?” and it sounded like Catherine.

Catherine was certainly eager to sit as close to us as possible, as she rushed to sit down on the chair closest to the couch. Stephanie sat beside me on the couch, sitting just like Kaitlyn and myself with her arm stretched out on top of the couch behind her two daughters. Mrs Woods sat on the chair closest to the couch on Stephanie’s side, whilst Mrs Johnson sat next to Mrs Woods, closer to the TV. Jan sat opposite Mrs Johnson, but her chair had been moved closer to Catherine’s and the couch.

It all made it look like Mrs Johnson was the farthest away, which I think we were all thankful for. The obnoxious smell of her perfume had now found its way into everyone’s nose and it seemed everyone was trying to avoid her, but without her noticing.

Even though we had all gathered around the TV, I noticed that everyone’s chairs had been turned slightly in the direction of Kaitlyn and myself. It felt like being in the spotlight, with everyone watching, and it was incredibly uncomfortable.

“You two get along much better than my two sons at home.” Mrs Johnson said.

Over the course of a few minutes, I had slid slightly down the couch and my head was resting on Kaitlyn’s shoulder. Kaitlyn was resting her head against mine, whereas before we had just been sitting side by side with our shoulders resting against each other. 

I guess the new position really emphasised the ‘big sister little sister’ thing we had going.

Kaitlyn and I grinned at Mrs Johnson as Stephanie spoke.

“They’ve always been very close.” Stephanie said to Mrs Johnson with a proud smile, before turning back to the TV.

The ladies took turns in talking to us. Catherine started a conversation with Kaitlyn about the outfit she was wearing, wondering how she had pieced it together. She was especially happy with the way Kaitlyn had arranged her hair, claiming that it was “exactly like I had mine a couple of days ago.” 

When Catherine turned on me and began asking about my outfit, Kaitlyn put her arm around my shoulders and held me protectively. 

“Courtney really enjoys watching the lions.” She said. Catherine nodded slowly and continued talking to Kaitlyn instead, who began to explain how she came up with my outfit. Occasionally Kaitlyn would point at my hair or my shoes, the hair band or the necklace she made me wear. Kaitlyn claimed that the necklace I was wearing was a present that she bought me for my 10th birthday, causing Catherine to go “Awww” and place her hand on her heart.

I couldn’t help but grin at how manipulative Kaitlyn was being.

Jan began a general conversation with all of the women about the conditions in the office, and soon they were all expressing their opinions to Mrs Johnson. A simple “I’ll look into it” from Mrs Johnson was enough, at least after saying it a couple of times, to get all the ladies to calm down.

Mrs Woods turned her head towards us and gently spoke, her eyes occasionally turning between the TV and myself.

“So Courtney… How is school going?” Mrs Woods asked.

I wanted to pretend that I hadn’t heard her, but I had already looked at her and smiled. How was I going to answer that question? Kaitlyn and I hadn’t even thought about school, and why would we? I was going to be back to my old self again when my parents were legally obliged to come find me, the thought of Courtney going to school had never crossed my mind.

Well maybe it did, once or twice.

When I realised that neither Kaitlyn nor Stephanie were saying anything to help me out, I had to improvise my own answer.

Things would be so much easier if I really was Courtney, I thought.

“It’s okay… the work is quite hard.” I said. Kaitlyn then whispered in my ear “Good answer sis” and nobody seemed to notice her.

“Yes, my Emily will agree with you there.” Mrs Woods said.

“Courtney starts Year 8 in September, don’t you dear?” Stephanie asked as she stroked the back of my head.

“September.” I repeated, without realising that I was digging my hole even deeper. 

Mrs Woods smiled and nodded, then turned her attention to Stephanie.

“You know Steph, I’ve been thinking about becoming a teacher myself some day.” Mrs Woods said.

“What? And leave the newspaper?” Stephanie asked, sounding quite surprised.“Well, I’ve been thinking about working closer to home, without having to commute all the way to Orlando.” Mrs Woods said.

Stephanie took her by the arm and made her come into the kitchen, quickly saying, “If you’ll excuse us a moment.” The other ladies didn’t seem to be listening, and were all engrossed in their own conversation about one of the new employees, so Stephanie and Mrs Woods were able to sneak out.

Kaitlyn and I continued to watch the Animal Planet whilst the three remaining women bickered between themselves about John, the new office intern. Eventually Mrs Johnson looked at her watch and tiredly said, “Well I better go, Steph I’m leaving!” She shouted into the kitchen. 

Stephanie came back into the lounge. “Leaving so soon?” she asked.

“Yes well I have to get back home and start dinner for the boys.” Mrs Johnson said.

Catherine and Jan were already getting their coats and bags.

“Those boys of yours will never learn to cook for themselves, will they?” Stephanie grinned.

“Well, I still have hope for them yet. Thank you for the tea and the chance to see your lovely girls.” Mrs Johnson said as she and Stephanie kissed each other’s cheeks. 

Mrs Johnson did the same with Mrs Woods, kissing each other’s cheeks. It wasn’t until she did the same for Jan and Catherine that I realised it was the female way of saying goodbye, or something. The chubby woman rounded on Kaitlyn and myself, and I was the first to be subjected to it. 

Kai had no time to give me any advice, because Mrs Johnson was soon bending towards me, her red lips puckered up. I stood on the spot, terrified as she landed a long wet kiss on my cheek which seemed to last forever before I saw her giant face move past me and kiss my other cheek. It felt like it lasted forever, as if it was in slow motion as this monster sucked on my cheeks. I thought I was going to throw up in her face when her lips touched me, and her perfume filled my nose, but fortunately I didn’t.
After she finally stepped away after what felt like an age, I smiled politely at her. Mrs Johnson smiled back as if nothing was terribly wrong and turned her torture on to Kaitlyn. 

It was almost as bad when I watched her do the same to Kaitlyn, who was clenching her fists behind her back when Mrs Johnson landed two giant kisses on her cheeks.

For once I felt like Kaitlyn was enduring more embarrassment than I was.

Mrs Johnson said her goodbyes and was the first to leave. Both Jan and Catherine kissed our cheeks too, but they were much more pleasant. Both women were wearing nice perfumes, and it didn’t feel like they took a piece of my face with them when we kissed goodbye. They were both very delicate about it, in contrast to Mrs Johnson.

“It was really good meeting you two, I hope to see you both again soon.” Jan said as she left and we waved her off.

Catherine bent down and hugged Kaitlyn and myself together before she left, and kissed our cheeks once again as if she hadn’t already done enough. “Kaitlyn has my number, get back to me about that shopping trip wont you?” Catherine asked. We both nodded and smiled at her as she left.

The funny thing was that I wasn’t forcing any smiles, all the kissing and hugging we were doing made me generally happy. Apart from with Mrs Johnson, that was a forced smile since I didn’t want to upset Stephanie’s boss.

Mrs Woods had stayed behind for a few more minutes to talk with Stephanie, but soon she was walking down the hallway towards the door with Stephanie following behind her.

“Emily is always saying how little she thinks of some of the teachers at school, perhaps I might be the one teacher she actually likes.” Mrs Woods said over her shoulder to Stephanie. “To think I might be teaching Kirsty and Lauren as well, isn’t it exciting?” she continued.
“Just think about it a bit more Abby.” Stephanie said.

“I will Steph, don’t worry. I wont be leaving you in a hurry.” Mrs Woods, or Abby, grinned back at Stephanie.

Abby bent down and kissed our cheeks once again.

“Great to meet you Courtney, I look forward to seeing you both at our house for that sleepover, if not sooner!” Abby said as she adjusted the strap of her bag over her shoulder.

Stephanie and Abby hugged and kissed each other’s cheeks once again, then agreed to call each other later on about ‘that thing they were talking about’. There was no point in them hiding it, Mrs Woods clearly wanted to become a teacher and to work at her daughter’s school. She must of thought Stephanie would like the idea because she might also be teaching Kaitlyn, and apparently Lauren too.

When all the ladies had left, the evening seemed to pass by quite quickly. We all had dinner together about an hour later, and Stephanie couldn’t stop repeating how happy she was with how well behaved her two daughters had been. Stephanie added that throughout the time they spent sitting around the TV, she had struggled to contain her pride when she saw her friend’s faces looking jealously at her daughters. 

Apparently Mrs Johnson had seriously suggested swapping her two sons with Stephanie’s two daughters for a few days. Thankfully my new mother had respectfully declined, saying, “I’m not as good with boys as I am with girls.” I found that quite ironic, since I was technically a boy that she was doing her best to keep to herself.

We didn’t talk about much else at dinner, so we all had huge grins on our faces throughout. When I eventually remembered what Stephanie had said about me going to school in September, I had to say something. 

“Mom?” I said.

“Yes dear?” Stephanie said as she slowly quietened down after a long period of giggling.

“Am I really going to school in September?” I asked. I felt like the party pooper when I asked a serious question like that and caused Stephanie’s smile to quickly vanish.

“Well, by law you have to go to school Courtney.” She said. “If you’re twelve like you say you are, you would be starting Year 8 when school begins, right?”

“I guess so, but wont it be hard to get in?” I asked. 

I was thinking that Courtney not being a real person was going to be a big obstacle in the way of getting her into a school, but Stephanie didn’t know that. Stephanie would be worrying about how she could get the school to register an orphan girl that she had only recently met.

“Nonsense, we’ll work something out I’m sure. There’s plenty of time for me to get you registered to go to school with Kaitlyn. I’m sure you’ll be wearing the same school uniform as Kaitlyn come September.” Stephanie said cheerily as we all finished up our dinner.

It was pretty hard trying to think of what Stephanie was going to do. By my thinking all this was temporary, but she was thinking the complete opposite. For all I knew, she could already be planning what I was going to wear to Prom.

I told Kaitlyn about how much planning ahead her mother had done, then joked that she might of already bought my wedding dress. But when Kaitlyn said “I wouldn’t put it past her” that really put the fear of god into me.

Kaitlyn and I spent the rest of our evening sitting together and watching TV in her room, during which time Kaitlyn reminded me of our late night plan. Suzanne eventually came in and said “Time for bed girls, come on Courtney.” 

Stephanie announcing it was time for bed was the cue for the nighttime routine to begin in the Allison household. 

Just like the night before I was ushered into Harpher’s room and left alone, with the same Minnie Mouse pyjamas piled neatly on top of my bed. I was able to undress myself without needing any help, although removing the hair band turned out to be slightly harder when a few strands of hair got stuck beneath the bow.

I was dressed in my pyjamas and lying under the covers when Stephanie peeked her head in to say good night. She kissed me on the forehead once again, and I decided it wasn’t so bad now after I had experienced the feeling of Mrs Johnson sucking on my cheeks earlier.

The lights inside and outside the room were turned off, but it was nearly an hour I had to wait before I heard the quiet knocking on the door. I had forced myself to read one Hayley’s short story books, one all about Beauty and the Beast, but the wording was specifically for little children and reading it actually made me feel silly.
At least the pictures looked interesting.

When Kaitlyn knocked, I swung my legs out of bed and snuck out the door as quietly as possible. Kaitlyn had left the door to her room wide open, so I tip toed through the doorway and sat down on her bed. My new sister took about ten minutes to come back with all of the supplies that she claimed we would need. She brought in several mugs filled with water, a small plastic basin, several thick towels and a white squeezy bottle. I struggled to make out what it was because Kaitlyn had only left a small lamp turned on.

“Where’s the razor?” I asked.

“I saw this and thought it would be better for now.” Kaitlyn said as she put one of the towels at the bottom of the door and plugged up the small gap between door and floor.

I gave her a confused look after she stood back up and turned the room light on.

She looked at me and then down at the towel at the bottom of the door. “It’s so my mom wont see light in my room if she walks past.” 

I nodded slowly. “So what is that stuff?” I asked, pointing at the white squeezy bottle.

“Hair Removal Cream.” Kaitlyn said. “Now off with those bottoms.” 

I pouted at her and pulled down the loose fitting pink pyjama bottoms.

“My hair will grow back though right?” I asked her as I tossed the bottoms behind me and onto the bed.

Kirsty snickered at me and nodded. She was soon squirting the white cream into her hand and spreading it all over my legs whilst I sat on the edge of her bed helplessly.

“Okay now imagine my mom doing this instead of me.” Kaitlyn smirked.

The thought made my skin crawl.

“I guess this is… a bit better than that.” I said with an uncomfortable smile as my legs began to feel tingly.

We waited a couple of minutes before Kaitlyn began to pour the mugs of water over my legs, washing off all of the cream and hundreds of loose leg hairs with it. She tried her best to distract me from the discomforting sight of seeing my hair piling up in that plastic basin.

“Now sis, tell me… did you have fun today?” she asked.

I looked up at her face briefly and thought about it. I guess it was kind of fun making those women jealous, pretending to be two adorable sisters. Kaitlyn and I were quite a good team.

“I guess I did have a bit of fun, yeah.” I told her.

“Good, I knew you would.” 

“Maybe being a girl isn’t so bad after all.” I said.

Kaitlyn washed the remainder of the hair removal cream and leg hair into the basin, and then helped me dry of my legs with the spare towels that she provided. It was a completely different feeling when I pulled my pyjama bottoms back on, with no little hairs catching on the material. Somehow the loss of all my leg hair made me feel slightly more vulnerable, more delicate. 

The sheen on my legs that I saw whenever I looked at them now made me instantly think ‘girl’ instead, when so many times before I had thought ‘boy’ and not noticed it.

I offered to help Kaitlyn clean up but she had sent me straight to bed, saying, “My mom will notice if you’ve been staying up late, she already knows that I like to stay up late.” I nodded in agreement, since it was now about 11pm and I had never stayed up past 11:30pm.

I snuck back out of Kaitlyn’s room and into Harpher’s room, then shut the door as silently as possible whilst Kaitlyn was tiptoeing down the stairs with the empty mugs.

As I lay there under the girlish pink Disney Princess bed sheets with the faint sounds of Kirsty sneaking around still in my ears, I fell asleep once again. But this time I fell asleep feeling genuinely happy, because I had actually had fun…even as a girl.