Her eyes felt like someone had placed ten pounds of weight on each one. She tried to open her eyes, but they just didn’t want to oblige. Her head felt like someone had stuffed it full of cotton. Breathing in and out of her nose was not possible. Swallowing caused her ears to pop. Her tongue felt like sandpaper in her mouth. She tried to lick her lips but it was like rubbing dried leather across them.
“Welcome back.” A voice sounded from next to her. “Need some water?”
Erika tried to nod her head but found that a mistake as well. She heard the person shift and get up. Then felt a straw touch her lips. She took it and sucked on it. The water was room temperature and tasted of chlorine and other ‘purifying’ chemicals. Her mouth was so dry that she didn’t care about the taste. She took a second draw on the straw and swished it around her mouth to wet it. Any moisture was welcome even room temperature water.
“How do you feel?” Her mother’s voice came to her.
Erika licked her lips successfully this time. “Like my head has been packed full of stuff.”
“It has.” Her mother confirmed. “Remember, you just had brain surgery.”
“Yea.” She managed.
“More water?” her mother asked.
Erika managed a slight nod and felt the straw against her lips again.
“You want to sit up? Or are you comfortable?”
Erika’s mind wandered on the cusp of sleep.
“Go back to sleep, dear.” Her mother told her. “Tricia and Samantha will be by later.”
Erika welcomed the comfort of sleep knowing that the surgery seemed to have gone well.
 
 
“Water.” Erika croaked as she began to hear noises around her.
“Oh good, you are awake.” She heard an unfamiliar voice. “I’m going to sit you up.”
Erika felt the bed move beneath her. “Can you open your eyes?”
The weight was still there, but she managed to crack them to a blurry, bright world. “Here is some water.” A nurse held a cup with a straw to her lips. Erika managed to reach and hold the cup as she sucked on the nasty water.
“My mom?” She croaked.
“I believe she went home. Your father just went for some coffee. He’ll be disappointed that he wasn’t here for your return.”
Erika shakily handed the cup back to the nurse and tried to open her eyes further. She felt the crustiness of sleep around her eyes and began to wipe some of it away.
“How are you feeling?” the nurse inquired.
“Like someone broke my nose.” Erika groaned.
“That’s about right. They did break it to perform the surgery but they made sure to fix it and even repaired your deviated septum.”
Erika managed a smile.
“Oh, good you’re awake.” Her dad greeted from the door.
“Hi, Daddy.”
The nurse checked a few monitors and typed some things into the bedside computer. “I just emailed the surgeon that you are awake. “He’ll be with you shortly.” She excused herself.
Mr. Martin stood next to his daughter’s bed and smiled down at her. “You feeling alright, Princess?”
Princess? He had never called her that before. It was a bit of a shock, but she kind of liked it.
“My Nose and face hurts.” Erika explained. Her voice sounded funny with all of the packing stuffed up her nose.
“The surgeon said that everything went well. They were able to take the tumor out and they fixed your nose.” Her father smiled.
Erika managed a weak smile.
“Aunt Carrie will be by in a bit. Samantha and Tricia will be driving over after school.” He explained. “I really like your friends. They seem like good girls who care a lot for you.” He squeezed her shoulder. “Julian and your friend Stan stopped in to see how you were doing. Julian brought you a teddy bear. And there are lots of flowers for you. Most are at home but a few are out in the family waiting room. They aren’t allowed in ICU. But once you get downgraded to a normal room, you can enjoy them.”
“Erika nodded her understanding.
“You go ahead and get your rest.” He instructed her. “I’ll be right here.” He held up a paperback. He just would not join the new millennium and read off of a tablet.
Erika closed her eyes and welcomed the darkness.
 
 
“….. don’t want to wake her.” Samantha spoke just above a whisper.
“Samantha?” Erika peaked through her lashes.
“Sorry.” Samantha apologized. “Go back to sleep.”
Erika opened her eyes wider. “Tricia?”
“Hi Love.” Tricia greeted. “Leeza and the fam send their love.” She took Erika’s hand in hers and gave it a squeeze
“Don’t forget Julian.” Samantha nudged her friend.
“Oh, yeah. He sends his love too.”
“Water.” Erika’s throat and mouth were like an ancient crypt.
Samantha grabbed the cup and looked in to it. “It’s warm. You want some cold?”
Erika nodded.
“I’ll be right back.” Samantha hurried out of the room.
“I miss you.” Tricia squeezed her hand. “Like lots.”
“I miss you too.” Erika managed. “Thanks for coming. I probably look like a mess.”
Tricia nodded. “The Doctor said that the swelling and bruising will go away in a few days.”
“How bad?”
“Looks like your face and a truck collided.” She giggled.
Erika stuck her tongue out at her friend.
“Here’s some ice water.” Samantha hurried in and handed the cool plastic cup to Erika.
Erika took several sips and swished it around in her mouth.
“Much better, Thanks.” Erika was almost full voiced.
“Whoa talk about crypt breath.” Tricia squished up her nose and pulled back.
“Tricia!” Samantha admonished.
“Sorry. But it’s bad.”
“She can’t help it.”
A knock at the door followed by a nurse’s head peaking in interrupted the conversation. “Are you hungry, Dear?” she asked.
“Yes.” Erika nodded slightly.
“I’ll have a sandwich brought up. Turkey okay?”
“Yes, please.”
“We can’t stick around.” Samantha nudged Tricia. “But we will be back tomorrow.”
Erika frowned
“Julian wants to come visit, but he is afraid of hospitals.” Samantha informed her friend. “He says he’ll try to see you after you leave.”
“My dad said that he came by.” Erika remembered.
Samantha nodded. “He did. It took everything he had and Stan’s support to get him here.” Samantha smiled. “Don’t count on seeing him until you get home.”
“Alright, you two.” Aunt Carrie poked her head in. “She needs her rest and you probably have homework.” She looked to Erika. “Glad to see you alert. I’ll be back this evening. Your mom should be here in just a few minutes.”
Erika waved to her favorite crazy aunt.
Erika held her arms out to her two best friends inviting them in for hugs.
The room felt very lonely once they left.
 
 
Erika used the bed controls to sit herself up further in bed as the nurse came in with a tray. She was so hungry that the turkey sandwich seemed like a feast. Vanilla pudding and fruit cocktail went down just as fast.
“Well hello, her mother greeted from the door.
Erika pushed away the tray. “Hi mom.”
“How are you feeling?”
“Like a bus hit me. And ran over my face twice.” Erika sighed. “The food helped, but boy does my nose hurt.”
“I’m sure it does.” Her mother gently swept a loose tress of hair away from Erika’s face. “They had to break your nose to get to the tumor and then fix it. You’ll be sore for a while.”
“When can I get this stuff out of my nose?” Erika asked.
“Another day or two.”
Erika groaned.
“How do you feel?”
“Mostly tired and sore.”
Her mother nodded. “Don’t stay awake on my account. If you’re tired, sleep. It’s the best medicine for you.” Her mother squeezed her arm. “I’m not going anywhere for a while. If you need anything, I’m here.” She sat down in a chair next to the bed.
“Thanks.” Erika closed her eyes.
 
 
Victoria and Samantha smiled as they entered the hospital room.
“Hey, nice new digs.” Samantha greeted. “Glad to be out of ICU?”
“Hi. Victoria? What a nice surprise.” Erika greeted.
Victoria smiled. “I hear you are getting out tomorrow.”
Erika nodded. “I can’t wait to sleep in my own bed.”
“How’s the head?” Victoria asked.
“Fine.”
“How long until you can get back on Rally?”
Erika slumped a bit. “Not for a while, unfortunately.”
“I’m sorry.” Victoria wrapped her friend up in a hug.
“I should probably quit until next year. It’s not fair to the others.” Erika sighed.
“Nonsense.” Samantha scowled. “I know for a fact that Jordon and Taylor are working routines around so that you can stay on.
“Really?” Erika queried.
Samantha nodded. “You are just as part of the squad as you ever were…. With a few modifications.”
Erika beamed.
Samantha looked to Victoria who played with the end of her braid and looked from Samantha to Erika.
“We have some bad news.” Victoria grimaced.
Erika looked from one to the other. “What’s going on?” she asked.
“My dad just got news” Samantha started. She looked for guidance from Victoria who nodded. She looked back to Erika. “The Prosecutor settled with Josh’s family.”
“What?” Erika couldn’t believe her ears.
“They didn’t have enough hard evidence against him.” Victoria stated. “Everything was hearsay and there were no other witnesses except for you and Rachel.”
“They also used our getting even with him as a bargaining chip in the settlement.” Samantha growled. “Can you believe it!” her voice was growing stronger and louder. “He’s going to get away with it again. The scumbag nearly raped me and from what we have been told this wasn’t the first time and he is going to get away with it…. Again!”
Victoria wrapped Samantha in a hug. She directed her look to Erika. “He got some stupid probation and court ordered counseling.”
“But he sexually assaulted you, and beat me up?” Erika protested.
“His parents hired some high-powered lawyers.” Victoria shrugged.
Erika wanted to cry. This was just unfair. A creep like that gets off. She wondered how long it would be until he tried raping another girl.
“Isn’t there anything we can do?” Erika pleaded to her smart friend.
Victoria just shook her head.
“I’m so sorry Samantha.” Erika felt tears on her cheeks.
Samantha sat heavily on the bed and wrapped Erika in a tight embrace. The two cried in one another’s arms.
“Do we know where he lives?” Erika asked.
“No.” Samantha sobbed.
Victoria sat next to Samantha and joined the hug.
“I’m sorry to have told you while you are in the hospital.” Samantha snuffed. “You need to be healing to go home, not worrying about this stuff.”
“I’m glad you told me.” Erika squeezed her friend. “Does Rachel know?”
Samantha nodded.
“We’ll figure out something.” Erika whispered. “Next time we’ll do more than superglue his butt cheeks together.
 
 
Erika stood in front of her mirror. She cocked her head to the side as she placed a hoop earring in her lobe and took a good look from top to bottom. Her dark curly hair had only needed a few spots touched up with the curling iron. Her long bangs were like a black piece of lace showcasing her sapphire blue eyes. Of course, it always helped when she wore a royal blue sweater. A white skirt and blue flats finished her ensemble today.
The Doctor’s orders were to only attend school half days this week. She chose to go back at lunch today after she and her father took Aunt Carrie to the airport.
Aunt Carrie was such a breath of fresh air. She could definitely see why the family called her crazy, but she loved that she was a little ‘off’.
Erika put on touch of lip gloss before padding downstairs to join the family.
“Good morning, Sunshine.” Aunt Carrie greeted from over her cup of coffee. She had donned one of her new wigs and looked lovely.
Erika smiled. “Good morning.
“You look adorable.” She appraised Erika’s outfit.
Erika dipped a curtsy. “Thank you.”
“I’m sure going to miss all of you.” Aunt Carrie took them both in with her gaze. “You’ve made this old broad very happy.”
“You’ll come back at Christmas, won’t you?” Erika asked.
“Oh, I don’t think so.” Aunt Carrie looked into her mug trying to scry the future. “I’ll see about coming for Easter though.” She looked to her Nephew.
“We’d love to have you any time.” He stated.
“Anytime.” Erika’s mom agreed joining them in the kitchen.
Aunt Carrie got up and wrapped Erika’s mother in a huge hug. “Thank you so much.” She blinked back tears. “You don’t know how much that means to me.”
Erika glanced to her father who was smiling and wiping a tear that escaped his eye.
“We have your email and phone number. And you have ours.” Erika’s mother stated. “There is no reason we can’t stay in touch.”
 
 
Erika followed her father and Aunt to the airline ticket counter. Small talk and long silences seemed to be what was called for.
After checking Aunt Carrie in as well as her luggage. Erika’s father wrapped Aunt Carrie up in a hug. “It has been too long, and it had better not be this long again.” He stated. “You are and always will be one of my most favorite people.”
“I Love you, John.” Aunt Carrie stated. “You have such a lovely family. I am so proud of you.”
“Yes I do. Thank you.”
Both turned to Erika. Erika flew into their outstretched arms, her heart near bursting.
“You are a lovely young lady.” Aunt Carrie stated. “I am so glad to have met you.”
“I love you, Aunt Carrie.” Erika squeezed tighter. Tears coated her cheeks.
“I’ll be back. I promise.”
Erika finally released her and stood back. Aunt Carrie blew her a kiss and turned to go through security.
“Will she be back, Daddy?” Erika asked.
“I sure hope so.” He sighed.
Erika took her father’s hand and walked back to the car.
 
 
“Thank you Daddy.” Erika gave her father a hug in the attendance office. She swung her book bag over her shoulder and headed to her locker.
“Hey look decided to come to school.” Jake heckled.
“At least I’ll graduate on time, Dick head.” She retorted.
Several people in the hall snickered at Jake.
Once she put her things in her locker, Erika headed to the cafeteria.
“She returns.” Krystal greeted. “How are you doing?”
“Fine.” Erika shrugged.
“Erika!” Jordon greeted, “Welcome back!”
“Hi Jordon.” Erika greeted.
“So, when will you be able to rejoin us on Rally?”
Erika frowned. “Not for a few more weeks. I’m sorry, Jordon.”
“Don’t be silly. You just had brain surgery. Don’t forget to wear your Rally outfit Friday.”
“Even if I’m not on the squad?”
“You are still on the squad. We’ll just have other jobs for you.”
“Thanks Jordon.”
The Rally squad leader smiled. “See you later.”
Tricia raced up and wrapped her arms around Erika and pressed her lips firmly to hers. Erika would have been flattered, but they were in the middle of the cafeteria. This wasn’t the place.
Erika disentangled herself from Tricia and smiled. “Good to see you too.”
“Don’t stop on account of us.” Greg called.
“Suck it, dumb ass.” Tricia didn’t even look his direction. She just stared at Erika.
“What?” Erika asked.
Tricia just stared at her.
“What?”
“I always forget how beautiful you are and how lucky I am.” Tricia wrapped her in another hug.
“So, I heard you got your nose done.” Krystal teased.
“Sure. After they broke it.” Erika grimaced.
Tricia guided her to their table where they sat with Samantha, Taylor and Jordon.
“So, what did I miss?” Erika asked looking at her friends.
They all looked at one another. “Not a whole lot.” Samantha stated. “At least nothing that we haven’t already told you at the hospital or at home while you were recovering.”
“Did you guys hear about that shooting over at the skate park?” Jordon asked.
“What? What shooting?”
“Some kids from Adams high were involved in a shooting at Heather’s skate park.”
“Do we know them?” Samantha inquired.
“I heard something about twin cheerleaders.”
“Allie and Annie?” Erika gasped.
“You know them?” Taylor asked.
“Yes. I’ve met them. They were very nice.”
“I heard a rumor that one was a tranny.” Jordon made a face.
Erika’s heart skipped a beat. One of the twins was transgender? She exchanged looks with Tricia and Samantha. Could it be true?
“Can you imagine having a tranny on the cheer squad and not knowing?” Taylor made a face at Jordon.
“How could they not know?” Jordon asked back.
“My sister happens to be Transgender.” Tricia growled. “She is one of the most beautiful women I have ever met.”
“She is very pretty.” Samantha agreed. “No one could guess that she was transgender.”
Both Cheer and Rally squad captains looked hard at Tricia.
“I’m sorry, Tricia.” I didn’t know. Jordon quickly apologized.
“No one would know if she didn’t tell them.” Tricia’s hackles were up. Samantha nodded.
“What’s wrong with being transgender?” Krystal asked pointedly not looking at Erika.
“It’s just kind of creepy, isn’t it?” Taylor asked.
“Have you ever met one?” Krystal rebutted.
Taylor shook her head. “No.”
“Are you sure?” Krystal added.
“I think I’d know if I have ever met one.” Taylor stated.
Tricia got up. “I’ve lost my appetite.
Samantha, Erika, Krystal and Victoria all got up as well.
“I didn’t mean anything by it.” Taylor stated. “Drama much?”
Victoria held back. “We have a good friend who is transgender. And you owe Tricia a huge apology.”

“Samantha, can we stop by the hospital?” Erika begged of her friend.

“I thought you’d be sick of that place.” Samantha looked to her friend.

“I am, but I think it would be nice to show Allie and Annie that there are people out there who are thinking of them. Especially if the rumor is true.”

“Sure.” Samantha nodded.

“Do you think it is?” Erika asked.

“That one of the twins is…. trans?”

Erika nodded.

“It’s possible, I guess.”

“I’ll text my mom and let her know that we’ll be late.”

“You two working things out?” Samantha asked.

“It seems like it. I think having Aunt Carrie come to visit might have helped. I don’t know. I guess I’ll find out over the next few days or weeks if she has come to accept me.”

Erika, with a vase of flowers walked down the hall to where a police officer was standing outside of a room. One of the twins and what looked like a big brother were sitting across the hall looking worried.

“Um Hello.” Erika greeted.

The two looked up. “Erika, right?” Allie asked.

Erika nodded.

“You’re a cheerleader for Washington High.”

“Rally squad, actually.” Erika smiled. I heard that your sister was shot?”

“Excuse me.” The guy with a cast jumped up. I’ll be over there.” He pointed with his chin.
Once he was gone, Allie invited Erika to sit. “You’ll have to excuse Evan. He’s pretty worked up over this.”

“I hope you don’t mind me coming by.” Erika smiled. “Your skater friends said that you’d be here.”

“I’m glad you came.” Allie smiled.

“Um.” Erika looked embarrassed. “I don’t know which twin you are.”

Allie chuckled. “I’m Allie. My sister is….”

“Annie.” Erika finished with her.” How is Annie?”

“She lost a lot of blood.” Allie bit her lip. “That asshole.” She shook her head. “Sorry. Annie has been in and out of the hospital more than anyone should. She just got out of here a few weeks ago, from a blood clot that traveled to her lungs. It almost killed her. She was just starting to feel better when that bastard Wexler shot her.” Tears streamed down Allies face.

Erika set the flowers aside and wrapped Allie in a huge hug. “I’m so sorry,” She stated.

“How can anyone have so much hate?” she sobbed. “Annie would never hurt anyone.”

Erika just held her.

Erika’s phone went off. Erika pulled back and checked it.

Samantha: We need to get going.

“Allie. I need to get going. My ride is getting impatient. Can I see your phone?”

Allie wiped away her tears using the back of her sweatshirt. And pulled her cell out of her pocket.

Erika quickly entered her cell number and email address. “Here is my contact info,” she handed the phone back. “Please let me know how she is doing. Let her know that the Washington High cheer and Rally squads are thinking of her. And if you need to talk…… well please…. You have friends on the other side of Constitution.”

“Thank you, Erika.”

“Take care Evan.” Erika said as she passed.

“Ya.” He just nodded.
--oOo--

“Well?” Samantha asked. “Did you find out if the rumor is true?”
“Samantha!” Erika screeched. “Annie is in a very serious condition. There is a family really hurting up there. Allie is a wreck and their older brother is torn up, and all you want to know is if the rumor is true?” Erika was shaking with rage.

“I’m sorry.” Samantha winced. “I thought that is why you wanted to come.”

“I wanted to come because I have met them a couple of times and they were very nice. I wanted to come to let them know that people cared for them regardless of any rumors.”

“I’m sorry.” Samantha pulled out of the hospital parking lot.
--oOo--

“So, Erika.” Dr. Barts broke the silence. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine.”

“How was your surgery?”

“It went good. They got the tumor.”

“Have you had any change in feelings? Emotional swings?”

Erika was silent. “Not really.”

“How is your mom?”

“She is still seeing you, isn’t she?” Erika asked.

Dr. Barts nodded.

“Then you’d probably know better than I.”

“Is there something on your mind, Erika?”

Erika was silent for a moment. “Did you hear about the shooting at the skate park? A cheerleader from Adams High school was shot.”

“I did hear something.” Dr. Barts stated.

“There was a rumor that she was a…. she was transgender.”

“Mmm.”

“Is it true?” Erika asked.

“I don’t know.” Dr. Barts stated. “Even if I did, I wouldn’t be able to tell you. It would be like me telling another patient that you were a boy.”

“I’m not a boy any longer.” Erika stated. “At least, I don’t want to be one.”

“MmHmm.”

“I get a choice now, don’t I?” Erika asked. “I figure with the tumor gone and with puberty yet to set in, I get a choice.”

“And what would that choice be?” Dr. Barts looked over the rim of her glasses.

“Why else would I be here.” Erika stated. “I want to be a girl. “When can I start Hormone replacement? Or blockers?” Erika asked.

“Once we figure out what your brains is going to do.” Dr. Barts stated. “I thought your Endocrinologist explained this to you.”

“He did.”

“I’m just afraid of starting male puberty.” Erika looked out the window. “Do you think she was shot because someone found out that she was transgender?”

“Are you afraid of someone threatening you?” Dr. Barts asked.

“I don’t know. Jordon and Taylor were grossed out by that cheerleader maybe being trans.”

“Many people are uncomfortable with the unknown or things that they don’t understand.”

“I understand not being comfortable, but hate? Taylor’s attitude was bordering hate.” Erika glanced at Dr. Barts then back out the window. “Allie said that the kid that shot Annie was full of hate…. I just don’t understand.”

“Very few do.” Dr. Barts said. “These are all good questions and good things to think about however, if you start getting depressed about any of this, you need to call me right away. These things can lead you to dark places. Places that you really shouldn’t go.”

“Okay.”

“Erika.”

“Yes.”

“You’ll call me, right?”

“Yes.”

“I’m not suicidal or anything.” Erika stated. “I’m just trying to figure things out. Then there is the whole Josh thing.

“What Josh thing?” Dr. Barts inquired. “Do you like Josh?”

Erika looked hard at Dr. Barts. Josh is the guy who tried to rape Samantha at camp last summer. His parents got a good lawyer and were able to settle out of court. He won’t even go to Juvie. Can you believe that? He tried to rape someone and gets off?”

“Did they do a rape kit or collect evidence?” Dr. Barts was concerned.

“No. We kind of washed it off when we got into the lake after knocking him out.”

Erika gave Dr. Barts some of the details of what they did. She left out the part about super gluing his butt cheeks together.

“And you and your girlfriends didn’t get arrested?”

“For protecting ourselves?”

“Knocking him out and reporting him was protecting yourselves. Stripping him naked and taping him to a tree was revenge. Didn’t the football team do something similar to you when you were Eric?”

Erika looked away from the Doctor.

“Erika?”

“I can’t believe that I did that.” Erika’s voice seemed distant, even to herself. “I wanted him to suffer. To feel as helpless as Samantha felt as he held her down. As helpless as I felt when I was on that flagpole.”

“Did you feel vindicated?”
“Yes…… no.”

“Which one?”

“Both?” her mind tried to avoid that incident. “Why would someone just shoot someone that was different?” Erika changed the subject. “Just because someone wants to be a girl?”

Dr. Barts sighed. “Your mom mentioned meeting your Aunt Carrie.”

Erika smiled.

“You like your Aunt Carrie?”

“She was a nice surprise.” Erika grinned.

“Your mother mentioned that Aunt Carrie is transgender.”

Erika nodded. “She scared me when I first met her.” Erika admitted. “She didn’t transition until later in life, after she had been a man for a while. She even fathered kids. They don’t speak to her.” Erika frowned. “There is too much hate. Aunt Carrie is so loving and caring.”

“She scared you how?” Dr. Barts asked.

“She looks like a man in a dress. A great big man, with facial hair and everything.” Erika grimaced. “But once I looked into her eyes, I saw the real person. The loving, wonderful, caring, woman who just wanted to be loved.”

“Is that why you want on blockers so quickly?”

Erika nodded. I don’t want to have to go through that and then try to get back to where I need to be.”
“You need to be?”

Erika nodded. “Dr. Barts.” She looked the Dr. straight in the eye. “I do not want to go through male puberty. I do not want to be a man. I want to be a girl.”

Erika dropped her gaze and looked out the window again. A layer of light snow dusted the bare tree branches.

“Now is by best chance of getting there. Before the testosterone changes me into something I don’t want to be.”

“Something you don’t want to be? Or Something that you are not?”

“Yes?” Erika asked. “I mean…. I don’t know what I mean. I’m at a crossroads. A crossroads that ninety-nine percent of the population cannot be at. A place where I get to choose where I want to go.” She looked back at Dr. Barts. “I want to be a girl.”

--oOo--

Erika sat down at her computer. Listening to make sure her mom was down stairs in the kitchen, she grabbed the waste basket next to her desk, lifted it up high and grabbed a bag of pills taped to the bottom of it. She selected two of the pills and swallowed them before putting everything back the way it was. She turned on her monitor and scanned her email.

Hi Matt.
So surgery went fine. I’m out of the hospital and back at school. Yes, I would love to get together with you while you are in town this weekend. There is a pretty cool food court in the mall here. They have lounge chairs and coffee tables, bar tables and a gas fireplace that we can hand around.
I’ll bring my sketch pad and stuff if you want. Should I bring Tricia and the other girls from Camp K?
Looking forward to seeing you.

Erika.

Hey Rachel.
Sorry I haven’t gotten to you sooner. Been dealing with a brain tumor and stuff. They got the tumor out through my nose. Gross, right? You should see Krystal. She is doing awesome. She has continued slimming down. Jorge says that she may not be losing weight but she is losing fat and gaining muscle mass. You should see how she tosses the cheerleaders around and catches them. You’d be jealous. And it all started with you at Camp K.
Hey. Samantha told me about Josh getting away with it again. I am so spitting mad. I think Samantha and I should drive to where he lives and take a sledge hammer to his Porche that he is supposed to be getting. I still can’t believe that he is getting away with this. What do you think we should do? I think we need to do something to let him know that he won’t get away with it, at least without some sort of payment.
Everything else here seems to be fine. Tricia is going to try out for the diving team. Don’t worry, I’m staying away from the diving boards.
Hope to hear back from you soon.
Erika.

“Erika!” her mother called up to her as she finished her email.

“Yes?”

“Someone is here to see you?”

Erika sighed, and padded down the stairs.

“Julian?”

“Hi, Erika.” Julian smiled shyly.

Stan stood beside him in the entranceway. “Hi Erika.”

“What are you two doing here?”

“Well.” Julian stretched uncomfortably, “I wasn’t able to stop by the hospital to see how you were doing when you were awake, and we were in the neighborhood.”

Stan stood behind him shaking his head ‘no’

“Come on in.” Erika stayed on the bottom step and gave her friend a hug. “I’m glad you came by.” She whispered into his ear. “I heard you aren’t fond of hospitals.”

“Nope.” Julian stated simply. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m glad and kind of surprised you came.” She waited for Stan to give her a hug as well. “I got the teddy you dropped off.” She smiled at the tall swimmer.

Julian’s face reddened.

“It was very nice of you.”

Erika’s mom came out of the kitchen. “I’ve got hot chocolate if you guys are interested. Soft drinks are in the fridge in the garage. Help yourself.”

“Thanks Mrs. Summers.” Julian stated.

Erika’s mom stopped and looked from Julian to Erika. Erika shook her head and mouthed. ‘Don’t’.
Her mom plastered a smile on her face and disappeared back into the kitchen.

“I heard that you were only doing half days at school this week.” Julian allowed Erika to lead him into the family room.

“Doctors orders.” Erika explained it away.

The three flopped into the various chairs and sofas.

Julian moved to the edge of the sofa and leaned forward to speak to Erika while watching for her mother in the kitchen. “Tricia has signed up to try out for diving.” He said. “I have my concerns.”

“Oh?” Erika kept her voice low.

“You know with her extracurricular activities?” He made the motions of smoking a joint.

“I don’t think it will be a problem.”

“They do require a drug test before allowing you on the team.” Stan joined. “She has said that she is good. I’d hate for her to try out and fail the drug test.”

“I honestly think it was that one time.” Erika looked between the two. “And she is very good. I got to watch her at summer camp.”

The two friends looked to one another. “We run a clean program.” Stan said. “We just want to make sure. We’d thought we would run it by you before going ahead with the try outs.”

“Here we are.” Erika’s mom handed the boys steaming mugs of hot chocolate.

They thanked her before sipping.

“I’ll be in the kitchen if you need anything.” She excused herself.

“Why aren’t you two having this conversation with Tricia?” Erika asked.

“We didn’t want her to feel like we were accusing her of something before we investigated a little more into the situation.” Stan stated. “Julian says that he saw her toking at Homecoming and it raised a red flag.”

“Well.” Erika stated. “I think you two need to go talk to her and ask her. But I’m telling you, she isn’t a druggie and she is an amazing diver. You’ll be lucky to have her on the team.”

The two finished their drinks, thanked Erika’s mother and left.

“You haven’t changed your name back to Martin?” her mother had her hands on her hips which did not bode well.

“I haven’t really had the opportunity.” Erika pointed at her head. “Brain surgery.”

“We are going to have to change that. It is on your transcripts and will cause a whole world of issues it we don’t change it.”

“Can we talk to the principal and ask if she can change it this summer?”

“Why?”

Erika took a deep breath. “Eric Martin is too close to Erika Martin. People will make the connection. Erika Summers is working. I don’t want anyone to connect me back to ‘The Plague’.”

“You really need to put this ‘Plague’ thing behind you.” Her mother huffed.

Easy for you to say. Erika thought but dared not speak.

Too cold to be wearing her normal dress or a skirt, Erika resigned herself to wearing a sweater dress over black leggings and boots. The outfit might have been appropriate for the December day, but it was a bit warm sitting in the stands that lined the indoor swimming and diving pool.

Erika waved at her girlfriend who just happened to be wearing a pink one piece bathing suit. Tricia waved back and lined up with the others all trying out for the diving team.

The smell of the heavily chlorinated pool stung her nose, which was a good sign since she had had a hard time smelling much since the surgery. The echoing of voices and other sounds made it impossible to make out let alone hear what the coaches were saying to the nervous group.

“She said she was clean.” Julian sat down next to Erika.

“I told you that it was an isolated incident. Why are you here?”

“As Swim Captain, it is part of my duty to be here to support the Dive team. They are like the Rally squad to the Cheer squad.” He smiled.

Erika watched as a tall thin girl climbed the ladder to the spring board. “I really don’t know much about diving. What am looking for?” She asked.

“Pointed toes, straight lines, grace, and little to no splash.”

Julian critiqued each diver as they entered the water and explained to Erika what they were doing wrong or right.

“Go Tricia!” Erika called as her friend climbed the ladder.

“Well that was clean.” Julian stated as Tricia’s feet disappeared under water.

“I told you she was good.” Erika beamed as she watched Tricia take a couple of strokes to the ladder and hoist herself out.

“That was just one dive.” Julian paused as another diver bounced from the board and tumbled into the water. “I thought that you were interested in trying out for the swim team.”

“I was, but I have a lot going on with Rally squad, homework, dealing with doctors’ appointments, and brain surgery.” Erika tapped the side of her head. “It just isn’t possible. Next year though.”

Julian nodded. “You have had a lot on your plate.” He agreed.

If he only knew, Erika thought.

After a while longer and many more dives, the coach excused the group back to the locker room to change, while he sat down with his clip board going over his notes.

Stan, padded up to his friends. “She made it.” He smiled at Erika. “You were right, she is very good.”
Erika beamed.

“Let’s just hope she can pass the drug test.”

“She will.” Erika stated with confidence she didn’t feel.

--oOo--

“Come on.” Erika pulled Tricia out of yet another store of the mall. “We are going to be late.”

“But that was really cute.” Tricia protested with a jutting lower lip.

If Erika wasn’t in such a hurry, she would have liked to suck on that pouty lip. But they were to meet Matt at the food court and she wanted to get some comfortable seats as well as a caramel latte.

They were in luck. Erika pushed Tricia into a love seat. “Stay here.” She ordered. “I’ll get us drinks. He should be here any moment.”

“I’m not sure if I like this pushy Erika.” Tricia grumbled. “It’s not like Matt is your boyfriend.”

Erika tossed a glare over her shoulder before heading to wait in line for their drinks.

He may not be a boyfriend, but I haven’t seen him since camp. She thought to herself. I wonder if he’ll recognize me. Why wouldn’t he? I haven’t changed that much. Well, physically I haven’t changed that much, mentally? Emotionally?

Erika returned to her girlfriend to find her wrapped up in a hug by her camp friend. Erika handed Tricia her drink and found herself wrapped up in a bear hug by the geeky writer friend.

“You look amazing.” He said pulling back and looking her up and down. Looks like brain surgery was good for you.” He smiled.

Erika flushed. “You are looking good yourself, Matt. How are things? How is the writing?”

The three friends sat down and began catching up on the past few months of events. Erika finally pulled out her sketch pad and pencils.

“So, Let’s get down to business.” She grinned. “I have been so busy, that I haven’t had much time to sketch. I may be a bit rusty.”

“As if that is possible.” Matt shook his head. He smiled at Tricia who took up her usual spot curling up next to Erika to watch and zone out as he began describing new as well as old characters.

The voice of her friend started to sound like it was coming through a tunnel. She shook her head as the edges of her vision began to gray out. Her pencil stopped as she stared at the sketch pad. She felt like she was losing the world around her. The gray edges darkened as her view of the pad narrowed. Erika slumped over as the world went dark.

“What? Erika?” she heard Matt call from a distance.

“Erika?” Tricia’s voice was full of worry. “Erika!?”

Eric looked into the mirror. His eyes ran over his male muscular body. His brain said that this wasn’t right, but he couldn’t figure out why. A baby’s cry sounded from the bedroom next to him. He glanced once more into the mirror, adjusted his boxer shorts and entered the room.

Samantha, her hair much shorter, was sitting in bed switching their daughter Summer from one breast to the other. Samantha smiled up at him warming his heart. She was so incredibly beautiful. Even more so since giving birth to their daughter. How could he possibly love her anymore?
Eric eased himself onto the bed next to his family and lay a hand on Summer’s head as Samantha lay her head against his broad muscular shoulder. Could live be more incredible than this?

Erika felt sick.

“She’s coming back around.” A voice said from nearby.

“Erika?” Tricia’s voice was full of pain and worry.

“The paramedics are here.” Another voice.

“What’s her name? what happened?”

“She just collapsed and started jerking about.” Tricia was almost in tears.

“Does she have any allergies?”

Erika wanted to cover her ears. It was as if the volume nob had been turned to twelve.

“Not that I know of.” Tricia’s voice cracked. “She had brain surgery a few weeks ago,”

Erika felt her body being lifted onto a something.

“Is she going to be alright?” Tricia asked.

“We are taking her to the hospital to have her checked out.” The paramedic’s voice stated.

Erika’s body felt like she had spent all day in the gym and adding rally practice to it. Her head felt very heavy and groggy. She tried to speak but couldn’t.”

“Has she had seizures before?” the paramedic asked.

“Seizures? Not that I know of.”

The ride to the hospital was horrible. Her already aching body cried out with every pot hole and her groggy head became a pounding headache.

By the time, they reached the E.R. Erika’s vision had returned, but it hurt to look around much. As if someone was shining a spotlight constantly in her eyes.

“Are you on any medications?” the Nurse asked

“Antibiotics.” Erika managed to get out. “Brain surgery.” She closed her eyes.

“I’m here, honey.” Erika’s mother sounded concerned.

“Mom?”

“Yes, dear. Your father is on his way.”

“What happened?”

“They think you had a seizure.” Her mother took her hand in hers and squeezed it.

“Everything hurts.” She complained.

“I’m sure it does a new voice said entering the room.

“You will probably be sore for the next few days. “How’s your head?”

“Almost a migraine.” Erika peeked through her lashes at the woman doctor.

“I’ll get you some medicine for that. I see that you prefer to be called Erika?”

Erika nodded, not bothering to open her eyes.

“Well, Erika, I know you aren’t feeling well, but could you tell me what happened before you lost consciousness?”

Erika nodded. She described how her vision narrowed and how sounds seemed to have come from down a long tunnel.

The doctor nodded as she typed on a computer next to the bed.

“I understand that you just had a tumor removed from your brain?”

“Yes. “her mother stated. “It was on the pituitary.”

“Okay.” The Doctor stated. “I’ve ordered a CAT scan and some blood work to be done. Sometimes this is just a side effect of the brain trying to heal its self.”

“Will it happen again?” Her mother asked.

“It’s hard to say at this point.” The Doctor backed herself to the door. “I hope to have answers for you soon.”

“I’m so tired.” Erika mumbled.

“It’s okay.”

Erika closed her eyes.

- - -

“How is she?” her father’s soft voice inquired.

“Resting. The doctor says that she’ll be tired for the next day or so.”

“Daddy?” Erika dared to open her eyes.

“I’m here. How are you feeling?”

“Like a bus hit me.”

“Your fan club is waiting out in the waiting area.” Her father smiled.

Erika smiled as she closed her eyes again. “I’m so tired.”

“Go ahead and sleep.

The next few hours were spent between tests and sleeping. The medicine for the head ache helped. Erika was able to open her eyes without pain, although she was still very groggy.

Finally, the release papers were delivered. Her dad helped her to her feet and let her balance for a moment before she took her first steps.

“Erika!” Tricia ran across the waiting room towards her. Erika braced herself for impact and was pleased when Tricia pulled up short and gently folded her arms around her in a gentle but long hug. “You scared me so bad. Are you alright?”

Erika nodded.

Tricia pulled back. “What happened?”

Erika looked to her parents then back to Tricia. “The doctor says that sometime that seizures can happen after brain surgery.”

Tricia wrapped her up in another hug. “I’m so sorry. Matt stayed for a bit, but had to go home. I’ve got your sketching stuff.”

“Thank you.” Erika gave her a thin-lipped smile. “I need sleep.”

“Tricia, we can drop you off at home on the way.” Mr. Martin offered.

“Really? Thanks.” Tricia took Erika’s hand and walked out to the car with them.

--oOo--

“Are you sure you are for this?” Erika’s mother asked.

“Yes. It is important to me.” Erika affirmed. “Does this look alright?”

“Yes.” Her mother glanced at what she was wearing. “You always surprise me at how well you are trying this.”

“This?” she asked.

“Your trying to be a girl.”

“I’m not trying anymore.” Erika growled. “I am a girl, now.”

“Let’s not start fighting before we get to church her mother waved her hand as if to wave away the argument.

Erika took a deep breath and let it out to calm down. Her mother was right. They shouldn’t try going to the house of God while arguing.

Erika pulled on her coat over a white sweater and red leggings which she paired with the red sandals that Aunt Carrie had bought her. It was a bit cold outside for sandals but they just looked to cute with the outfit.

“And you want to go back to that church?” her mother turned on the cold car.

“Yes. That’s where the twins go. I want them to know that they have a friend.”

Mrs. Martin nodded.

It didn’t take too long for Erika to find Allie and her brother at church.

“Hi Allie. How is Annie doing?”

“She is being released tomorrow.” Allie greeted. “How are you, Erika?”

“Better.” Erika embraced her. “I’m glad to hear that your sister is doing better.”

Annie looked to her brother “It was touch and go for a while. But she made it through. My dad is with her. Mom wanted to get us out of the hospital and what better way to feel better than church?” Her voice dripped with sarcasm.

Evan snorted. It may have been an attempt at a laugh, but he honestly looked miserable.

“Will you join us?” Allie asked.

“I would love too.”

“Mom, this is Erika. She is the cheerleader from Washington High that stopped by the hospital last week.”

“Hi Erika?” Mrs. Wilson greeted. “It was very thoughtful of you to see Annie.”

“I felt a kinship with your daughters.” Erika smiled. “You all were so nice to me when I joined you here a few months back.”

“Oh, yes. I remember you now. Is your mother here?”

Erika waved her mother over and introduced the two women.

Erika and her mother walked into sanctuary and sat with the Wilsons. Erika didn’t know why she needed to be there, but she knew in her heart that she had to be there.

“Erika?” a familiar voice called.

Erika looked around and spotted Julian. “Julian? What are you doing here?” She looked up from her pew to her friend.

“I go to this church.” Julian looked to Allie. “You two know each other?” Julian shook his head. “Small world.”

“We’ve met a few times.” Erika nodded.

“Erika was nice enough to stop by the hospital last week to see how Annie was doing.” Allie explained.

“Are you going to start coming here?” Julian was skeptical.

“I don’t know. Mom and I are shopping for a church.” Erika gestured towards her mother who was speaking with Mrs. Wilson.

“Why, Hello Julian.” She smiled a greeting to him.

“Hello.” Julian nodded. “It’s good to have you here. Welcome.”

During the sermon, Erika looked up to the cross. Was this why you wanted me, needed me here She asked. Because of the Wilson family as well as Julian? Is this where I belong?

The three walked out of the sanctuary and ambled off to one corner.

“I’m happy to see you here.” Julian beamed. “I hope you find a church, and I hope even more that it will be this church.”

“That would be so great.” Allie agreed.

Erika was aware that Evan was ever present. He gave his sister her privacy, but he seemed always nearby. Almost like a body guard. Well her sister had been shot. Would someone try shooting Allie too? Or was this just a case of a big brother being a big brother. Erika would never know, being and only child.

“I know we go to different high schools and across town from one another.” Allie stated, but I’d like it if you would come hang out with us skater girls some time.”

“I haven’t skated in a long time.” Erika thought back. The last time she or should she say, Eric had used his skate board was before he had discovered Erika. Back before the summer spent at Camp Kumoni. “I’m nowhere close to the level of you and your friends, but I would like that.”

“It’s my turn.” Allie held out her hand. “Let me see your phone.”

Erika handed it over and watched as Allie entered her info in Erika’s contacts.

“Thanks for coming to church with us today.” She handed the phone back.

“Let me know how Annie is doing.” Erika begged.

Allie waved as she and her family started for their car.

“Were they the reason for coming to church today?” Erika’s mother put her arm around her.

“I’m not sure. I think so.” Erika was lost in thought. “Is it stupid that I asked God that very question?”

“Not at all.”

Erika and her mother walked back to their car and headed home.

--oOo--

“You really think you should go to school today?” Erika’s mother was concerned.

“The Doctor said that if I was feeling up to it, that it would be alright.” Erika nodded.

Her mother sighed.

“Mom, I took it easy all weekend. I’m going crazy staying in the house.”

Her mother nodded.

Erika squealed and grabbed her coat and backpack before heading out to Samantha’s car.

“She let you” Samantha smiled.

“Barely.” Erika put on her seatbelt.

“So, what was it like?” Samantha pulled away from the house and headed to Tricia’s house.

Erika explained the best that she could about losing control of her body and waking up with a head ache and every muscle in her body being sore. She cringed as she told some of the details.

“And they think it is because of the brain surgery?”

Erika nodded. “The doctor says that some parts of the brain that were affected during the surgery are trying to heal and that this is one of the side effects.”

Samantha pulled up to Tricia’s house and honked her horn.

A moment later, the blonde dressed in pink bounced out of the front door. A huge smile covered her face when she saw Erika. She slid into the back seat and kissed Erika on the cheek before buckling in.

“Are we on for Christmas shopping after school?” Samantha looked to her two friends.

“Sorry. Dive practice.”

“My mom would freak if I didn’t go home. I’m lucky she let me come to school today.”

“We need to go soon. Christmas is just around the corner.”

“What are your plans?” Tricia asked Erika.

“According to my mother, my grandmother is coming for Christmas.”

“Is that good or bad?” Samantha pulled into the school parking lot.

“I don’t know.” Erika unbuckled. “When my mom and dad got into that huge fight, after mom called the cops on me, she spent a few weeks with my grandmother. When she came back she seemed to have changed her mind, but I just don’t know.”

“Sounds like a good thing.” Tricia got out of the car.

The three girls walked towards the front doors of the school. Erika realized that she didn’t cringe while walking by the flagpole any more. In fact, she barely took notice of it anymore. The thought made her smile.

“There you are.” Victoria greeted them in the hall.

Erka smiled.

“The rumor is that you had a heart attack at the mall.” Victoria giggled. “Should I smash the rumor or let it run?”

Erika shrugged. “I really don’t care.

“You are doing okay, right?”

“Yes.”

“Whew. I was worried about you.” She stated. “Hey, I gotta go. See you at lunch?”

The three nodded.

The three girls walked into Mrs. Anderson’s class and walked back to take their seats.

“Hey spaz.” Jake remarked as Erika passed.

Samantha walking behind Erika Smacked Jacob across the back of the head.

“At least I have an excuse.” Erika snapped. “What’s yours for being a dumb ass?”

Tricia and Samantha giggled as well as several other girls in the class.

“Alright everyone!” Mrs. Anderson started class.” Find your seats and pull out your pencils. Pop quiz.”

A grown went up through the class.

As much as she hated pop quizzes, or dealing with Jacob for that matter, Erika smiled to herself. It was good to be back at school.

Still not cleared to practice with the squad, Erika was resigned to create even more posters for the various teams. When that was done, she was tasked with starting smaller, more personal posters for the individual players.

Creating such important works of art was quite difficult when all she kept doing is looking up and watching her friends learn and practice routines.

She would have to definitely push the doctors to allow her back on the real rally squad and not the rally squad support. She almost felt like she was the rally squad manager, doing all of the menial tasks for the squad. Sure, she was on the team, well, kind of on the team.

She sighed heavily and finished another poster and set it aside.

“Turn that frown upside down.” Jordon directed. “I know it doesn’t seem like you are doing much, but it is a big help to us. Beside you are so amazing.

“Okay everyone, take a break and hydrate.” Melinda announced to sweaty, tired cheerleaders.

“Having an artist on squad is making our lives a lot easier.” Samantha plopped down next to Erika.

“Boring as hell for me.” Erika argued.

Samantha managed to down the entire bottle of water without guzzling it. In fact, she looked very lady like while she was doing it.

“What are you staring at?” Samantha tossed the bottle into the recycle.

“In camp, you told me not to guzzle water.” Erika explained. “Yet, I just saw you do just that, but you made it look elegant.”

Samantha tried to hide a smile. “It’s all technique.”

“Hi girlfriend.” Krystal and Jorge approached.

“Hey. I shot an email off to Rachel the other day telling her how great you’re doing.” Erika pushed aside the poster boards and markers.

“Isn’t she though?” Jorge stood back and looked Krystal up and down.

“Definitely.” Samantha added.

“Hey, Erika?” Melinda approached with Jordon and Taylor. “Will you be able to join us for the basketball game Saturday?”

Erika mentally ran through her schedule. “I believe so.”

“No doctor appointments?” Melinda clarified.

“Nope.” Erika smiled.

“Fantastic. We have been missing you.” Melinda smiled. “I know it’s been rough with all of your health issues, but we do want you as part of the squad.”

“I’m meeting with my surgeon tonight. I’ll see if I can get cleared to join in with the squad again.”

“Thank you,” Taylor smiled. “We really do need you.”

“See?” Samantha tossed her second empty into the recycle. “You are loved and missed.”

--oOo--

“I’m home.” Erika called out.

“Just in time. We need to get to your doctor’s appointment.” Her mother was already slipping on her coat and grabbing her purse.

Erika dropped her back pack in the entryway and followed her mom back out into the cold, icy weather.

The Doctor’s visit had gone better than she had hoped. Although there was some concern over the seizure, The Doctor gave her permission to join the Rally squad. The other great thing was that her doctor agreed and prescribed hormone blockers. It was the first step in her getting Hormone replacement therapy.

Mrs. Martin pulled into the Olive Garden parking lot. “I love you very much.” She told Erika, but I still don’t like this changing gender thing.”

“I’m sorry, Mom, but it is my life, my choice and if it turns out wrong, my mistake.” Erika entered the restaurant.

“Hi Daddy.” She greeted her father.

“How did the Doctor’s go?” he asked once they were seated.

Erika detailed the information that the doctor had given her. She witnessed her mother shooting her father certain looks of frustration and doubt. Her father however smiled and congratulated her.

“And since I have been cleared for Rally, there is a basketball game this Friday.”

“You’ll be dancing?” her father inquired.

“Probably not too well since I haven’t been able to practice, but yes.”

“Then we will be there.” He looked to his wife and gave her a look that said we are going.

“So, I got an interesting call this afternoon.” Her father shared. “First off, our family photos are ready for pick up. Second, the photographer would like Erika,” He looked at his daughter, “To come back in for a private shoot.”

“What?” her mother questioned.

“She said that Erika photographed very well and would like to shop her pictures around to a few modeling agencies.”

“How much money does she want for that?” her mother rolled her eyes.

“Actually,” her father went on. “Nothing. she even said that she knew a big-time agent back in Los Angeles.”

“And she is willing to do this for free?” Her mother shook her head.

Her father nodded. “That’s what she said.” He looked at his Daughter and held Erika’s gaze. “What do you think? Would you like to try modeling?”

Erika was flabbergasted. She didn’t know what to think. How was all of this possible? She was living her life as a girl, which seven months ago would have been laughed at. She had friends; good friends for the first time in her life. She was of all things on the Rally squad and now she was being asked if she wanted to be a model?

She actually, physically pinched herself to make sure she wasn’t in a dream.

“Seriously, Daddy?”

He nodded. “It’s all up to you.”

“But she is not a real girl.” Mrs. Martin whispered harshly across the table.

“We need to start thinking in terms of her being one.” He admonished.

“But modeling?”

Mr. Martin pulled out his tablet and pulled up a file. “I did some research this afternoon.” He said showing his wife. “These are male models that pose as women, and to be fair I even found a few female models who pose as men.”

“Transvestites.”

“No. professional models. I’m sure that you’d even recognize a few of these from your magazine ads.”

Erika’s mother just shook her head as she looked through the pictures.

Samantha is way prettier than I. she thought. How could they want me?

The rest of dinner went by in a fog. She couldn’t even have told you what she had eaten or if it was any good.

One home, she raced up to her room and called Tricia, then Samantha and Krystal and told them of the photographer’s offer.

She then got on her computer and emailed Rachel, Katie and Danni. Once that was done, she grabbed two pills from her stash under her trash can and quickly swallowed them. With the newly prescribed blockers and these herbs, perhaps she could get a jump start on her eventual goal.

--oOo--

Friday and even though she had always worn her rally uniform on Fridays, she now felt like part of the squad and part of the team again.

Eric had never been to one of the basketball games. The plague would have been hauled out by the upperclassmen as a bad omen or more likely spat upon, had drinks dumped on or worse.

Tonight, was the first home basketball game and Erika’s first as well. The Rally squad watched from the side of the court as the Cheer squad went through their paces, entertaining the gathering crowd.

Since she had been cleared, Erika worked as much as she could on the newer routines, but really couldn’t get them all down as of yet. The ones that she knew she didn’t know, she would stand off to the side and encourage her squad. The ones she had down but now well, well, she just stood out a bit more than the rest of the squad.

The squad was responsible for holding the paper ‘wall’ that the players were to bust through while the cheer leaders made the short tunnel as the band played the fight song.

Erika spotted Tricia sitting next to her parents just a few rows up in the stands. Tricia waved.

Their football team might have been one of the best in the state, their basketball team however was horrible.

When the rally squad wasn’t cheering on the team or trying to get the fans excited, they knelt on the hard floor just outside the court boundaries.

Jordon had warned her to keep an eye on the game at all times because the basketball could be thrown right at them. Erika was thankful for the warning. Twice in the first half she had to dodge a missed pass or tipped ball. She was already starting to get a head ache and was sure being beamed in the face with a basketball would only have made things worse.

At the half, Washington was down by 20 points and looked like they were going to lose by even more. Both cheer and rally squads took the floor. Erika knew enough of this show that she felt comfortable not sticking out too poorly.

They were almost done with their show when the edges of her vision started to gray. The music they were dancing to sounded like it was coming out of the locker rooms with echo upon echo.

Shit she swore to herself. She took a deep breath and kept with the routine. Maybe she was just imagining things. Her vision started to narrow further. Erika stopped and hurried over to where Tricia and her parents were sitting.

The gray was turning to black. Her mother saw the look on her face and jumped up followed by Tricia.

“Are you okay?” Her mother asked.

“Mom it’s……. “Erika’s world dissolved to black. She felt her muscles begin to lock up as she fell.

--- ---- ---

Pete watched as Erika suddenly started to leave the court. Her face was one of confusion and panic.

He’d seen that look plenty of times on his mother’s face. He jumped three bleachers to the floor and Sprinted to where her mother was approaching her. He fell into a slide with his arms up and caught her before she hit the floor. Her body was already ridged and starting to spasm. He quickly lowered her to the gym floor and rolled out the way. “Someone call 911!”

“What?” She could faintly hear her mother as if she was down a very long corridor.

“She’s having a seizure. My mother has them.” Pete stated. “Talk to him….” Eric was Erika now, dummy. “Um Talk to her and keep everything clear.” Pete hoped that no one caught his slip up.

“I’ve got you.” It was her mother’s voice. It seemed a long way off “I’ve got you.” She heard her mother say again. “It’s okay, honey. You’re okay. I’ve got you.”

Her mother’s voice began to fade away. Erika tried to stay with it, but she wasn’t strong enough silence and true blackness swept over her mind.
--- --- ---

Eric knelt on one end of the living room, Samantha, with shorter hair knelt on the other. Eric’s hands were out in front of him lightly holding Summer’s fingers. The little girl, his daughter stamped her feet and giggled. Eric let go and watched as his little girl wobbled a bit then took a step forward, then another. His heart felt almost as if it was going to explode with love and happiness. The next few steps came even faster as she lunged into her mother’s waiting arms.
“Good girl!” Samantha laughed. “I’ve got you.”

--- --- ---

Jordon did her spin and watched in confusion as Erika left in the middle of their dance. She knew this dance, why was she leaving.

“Oh, my God.” Jordon exclaimed as she watched as Erika’s body seemed to go straight and rigidly fell towards the floor. The nerdy A.V. kid was sliding across the floor, catching her, saving her from hitting the floor.

Holly crap that was cool. What was she thinking? It was horrible. The poor girl was jerking and shaking all over as her mother tried to soothe her.

The other girls on Rally stopped to see why Jordon had stopped.

“Everyone, form a wall around Erika!” Jordon didn’t wait to see if anyone had heard her, she sprinted over to Erika and tried to shield curious eyes. The next thing she knew, all of Rally and Cheer were side by side facing out like buffalo sheltering their young. Guarding from any danger.

“Stay back!” Samantha shooed a curious onlooker.

“An Ambulance is on its way.” one of the game officials called through the wall of cheerleaders.

A middle-aged woman approached Jordon. “I’m a nurse, Let me through.”

Jordon stepped back, then retook her place in the wall.

“There is nothing here to see, people!” the game official was guiding people away.

Jordon looked back to see Erika still lying there. The seizure seemed to be over, but She still lay motionless. He mother had her head cradled in her lap and stroked her hair as the nurse was taking Erika’s pulse and asking questions.

This was her fault. She had pushed to get Erika back to full practice. They were getting ready for competition and Erika was nowhere near ready. She should have just waited. Now her poor friend and squad member was laying helplessly on the floor.

--- --- ---

“I’ve got you.” Her mother said. “I’ve got you. You’re going to be fine. It’s almost over.”

Erika’s head pounded. Her eyes burned

“Sick.” She managed to get out.

“Roll her!” a strange voice commanded.

Erika felt her body being turned even as she felt her stomach heave its contents, then heave again.

“Erika, can you hear me?” the strange voice asked.

“Mmmhmm.”

“Take a deep breath. Try to relax. We’re taking care of you.”

“You are doing well.” Erika, she heard her father’s voice.

“I’ve got you, honey.” Her mother affirmed. “I’ve got you.”

“The paramedics are here.” A voice announced.

Oh, god, I did this in front of the whole school. Now I’ll be teased for this. Perhaps Jake was right. Perhaps I am a ‘spaz’.

Erika felt herself being put onto a stretcher and then wheeled outside. The cold air was almost a blessing. She cracked open her eyes in the dark to see two paramedics, Her parents and Tricia.

“You ride with her.” Her dad instructed her mom. He looked at the very worried Tricia. “Tricia and I will follow in the car.”

Erika closed her eyes again as she was loaded into the back of an ambulance. She was feeling to miserable to protest. Hopefully they would give her some pain killers at the hospital. Her head felt like someone was taking a sledge hammer to it.

“You’re going to feel a squeeze.” The blood pressure cuff began to tighten on her arm. “Do you remember what happened?” the voice asked.

“I started to….. I started to feel like I did the….. the last time.” She swallowed. “Did I really…… have a …..seizure in front of…… the entire school?”

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about.” Her mother’s voice was thick with worry.

It took four hours to finally get released from the hospital. Fortunately, Tricia was allowed in the room with her and her parents. The explanation for the seizures was once again, her brain healing from surgery. The pain meds seemed to help with her head ache. She was given a prescription for some more for the coming day’s muscle pain.

Tricia gave her a huge hug before getting dropped off. “Call me.”

Erika nodded.

When they got home, Erika trudge up to her room and stripped. It may have been very late, but She needed a long, hot shower. Afterwards she lay in her bed and listened as her mother and father spoke in hushed tones. Her mother was crying. She could tell by the change in her voice, her sinuses stuffed up from the tears.

“It’s all my fault.” She sobbed. “I’m the one who made him get the tumor removed. Now he might have to live with seizures.”

“Her.” Erika’s father corrected. “She and her.”

“Whatever. It is my fault.”

“It isn’t your fault. She needed the tumor removed and we could not have known that it would cause seizures.” He insisted. “The doctor has referred her to a Neurologist. I’m sure there are medications that can help with this. You need to stop blaming yourself. We’ll figure this out.”

“I can’t help it.” She cried. “I knew there was something wrong when I saw her face on the basketball court. I…. I ….I couldn’t do anything. She just fell and started convulsing.”

“You did what you needed to do. You spoke to her and reassured her.” Mr. Martin soothed. “I have to say I am pretty impressed with how the rally and cheer squads reacted.”

“Oh?”

“You didn’t see how they created a wall around Erika?”

“I was to focused and worried about Erika.”

Erika, in her nightgown knocked on her parent’s door.

“Yes, Sweetie.” Her father answered.

Erika pushed open the door. She locked her mother’s gaze “I heard you mom.” Her mother winced slightly. “I heard you tell me that ‘You had me’ and that I was ‘going to be all right.” She smiled. “It helped.”

Her mother started crying anew and held out her arms. Erika raced over and was wrapped up in her mother’s arms. She squeezed her tight and then felt her father wrap the two of them up in his.

Erika’s heart pounded against her chest.

“You’ll be fine.” Samantha assured.

“But everyone saw.” Erika wanted to cry, but now wasn’t the time. She had to walk into school after making a total fool of herself at the basketball game.

“If anyone says anything, just ignore them.” Tricia squeezed her hand. “It is none of their business anyway.”

“We’ve got your back.” Samantha nodded. “All of Cheer, Rally, Victoria. We’ve got you.”

Erika wanted to hug and hug her best friend. But the car was getting cold and they needed to get into school.

The three walked in side by side.

Erika could see and even feel the whispers as she passed.

That’s her, the one who convulsed all over the basketball court

Check out the spaz.

Did you see her at the basketball game?

She didn’t actually hear what people were saying but she could imagine the gossip and rumors flying around school. Her stomach was tying its self in knots. It wasn’t nearly as bad as dealing with things as the plague, but it had shades of those days and times.

The three friends walked into Mrs. Anderson’s class. No one said anything, but many watched as the spaz walked by to take her seat. She was waiting for Jake to say something. He always did, but he seemed as if trying to ignore her.

Once she took her seat, everyone seemed to be looking everywhere but at her.

Erika swallowed the lump in her throat.

Jake got up, turned around and straddled his chair. Resting his arms on the seat back, he laid his chin on his forearm and just looked at Erika.

Erika took a deep breath through her nose and tried to calm her racing heart. Here it comes.

“Hey.” He gave her a weak smile.

“What is it, Jake?” She braced herself.

“Just wanted to know if you are okay.”

Erika just stared at him in shock. Where was the punch line?

“Listen,” he glanced at Samantha then to Tricia. “I may give you a bad time.” He paused, “But it’s only because I like you. I’m sorry that you had a seizure at the basketball game. I’m glad you are alright.” A tight smile touched his lips before he launched himself up, turned around and sat back down as Mrs. Anderson walked in to begin class.

Erika could have been pushed over with a feather. What just happened? Jake….. Jake was just nice to her. Jake the smart ass who went out of his way to tease her had just been sweet. She didn’t realize that she had been holding her breath. She let it out slowly and took two deep ones then looked to Tricia who seemed to be beaming then to Samantha who looked almost as bamboozled as she felt.

Last year, Jake had done some teasing of Eric, the plague, but it wasn’t to the horrible degree that some of the others had, like the football players. Eric did try to leave a wide berth around Jake, and Erika had had some rough times earlier this year with him, but this? It had to be a set up for something. It just had to.

Luckily by the time she made it to lunch the school was mostly over the fact that she had made s spectacle of herself at the game.

Tricia guided her straight to their table. “Sit. I’ll get your food.” She ordered.

“I’m perfectly able to get it.” Erika protested.

“Let her do it.” Samantha sat next to Erika.

“But…”

“There were only two people more scared than Tricia at the game.” Samantha made sure Erika was looking at her. “Your mom and dad. Do you realize, that Tricia was crying on the phone to me for a few hours over the weekend?”

Erika shook her head.

Samantha just nodded.

“Nice half-time show, Spaz.” Greg threw as he walked by.

“Greg!” a math teacher heard his remark. “You will apologize to Ms. Summers and then you will see me after school.”

“But…. Fine.” Greg spun approached the table and looked at Erika. “I’m sorry for my comment, it was uncalled for.”

Erika just glared, she didn’t know what else to do, this Ass Wipe had made Eric’s life hell and had been attempting to do the same to Erika.

“After school.” The teacher reaffirmed.

“Hey Pete.” Samantha called. “Pete, yes you.”

Pete came over to the table. “Feeling better, Erika?” he asked.

Erika nodded.

“Do you remember Pete saving you?” Samantha asked.

“It was very cool.” Jordon agreed joining them.

“It was nothing. I’m just glad I was able to break your fall. You might have ended up with a broken nose or concussion.” He stated.

“Break her fall?” Jordon shook her head. “He was amazing. I don’t know how he knew, but he went sliding across the floor under you, catching you and rolling to the side. It was like something Jackie Chan would do.”

Pete was turning bright red.

“Really?” Erika asked with disbelief.

“I wish we had a recording of it. it was amazing.” Samantha agreed with Jordon. “How did you know?” Samantha asked.

Pete shrugged. “My mom has seizures; I’ve learned what to look for and after hearing about the event at the mall…. My mom calls them events…. Well anyway I saw her face and didn’t realize what I was doing until it was done.

“I think I remember your voice.” Erika smiled up at her hero. “Thank you, Pete.” She touched his hand. She was slightly hurt when he quickly pulled away.

“Oh my God, it’s you!” Tricia almost tossed the tray of food on the table. “You’re the one who saved her.” Tricia threw her arms around the geeky guy and held him in a long, tight embrace. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” She pulled back, looked at the poor shocked kid and pulled him back in for another hug. “You are incredible. Thank you.” Tricia let him go this time.

The poor A.V. guy. Even the tips of his ears were red.

“I need to go eat.” Pete made and excuse.

“Eat with us.” Tricia commanded. “Please……”

“Pete.” Erika filled in. Tricia meet my personal hero Pete. Pete meet my girlfriend, Tricia.”

“What would you like to eat?” I’ll go get it.” Tricia hopped up.

“I’m fine.” Pete held up a sack lunch.

“Coffee? Soda?” Tricia went on.

“Sit down Tricia.” Erika directed. “Can’t you see you are embarrassing him?”

“I’m so sorry.” Tricia backed away and took her seat. “You sure I can’t get anything for you?”

“You said that your mom has seizures?” Erika prompted.

Pete nodded. “That’s why when I saw your face, Eric…ka, I kind of went into automatic catch and clear mode.

Erika’s heart skipped a beat. Pete was so flustered that he was forgetting the secret. She hoped that especially Jordon didn’t catch that.

“Catch and clear. I like that.” Erika smiled. “Maybe I’ll use that as my signal, if it happens again.”

Tricia and Samantha both shot Pete and Erika a glance. Erika just nodded her head slightly. Tricia mouthed ‘later’.

“Will it happen again?” Jordon inquired around bites of her yogurt.

“It’s possible.” Erika shrugged. What could she do about it?

“Is it safe for you to be in Rally?” Jordon put forth holding a full spoon inches from her mouth.

“The doctor said to do everything normal. That sometimes there is a trigger and that I’ll start to figure out what it is. He’ll be putting me on medicine to help control anything that might happen. But most likely that it is just my brain healing from the surgery.”

“Pete, how often does your mother have seizures?”

“It all depends. There are times when she has as many as three or four in a day and then she’ll go for weeks without having one.”

“Is she on medication?” Erika asked.

Pete nodded. “She says it helps some.”

The rest of lunch was spent pumping Pete for information.

“Seriously, Pete.” Tricia said. “If you need a favor, just ask.”

--oOo--

As per their schedule. Samantha and Erika waited in the car for Tricia to get out of Dive practice. Finally she slid into the back seat. “Okay, spill.” Tricia directed at Erika. “Pete almost slipped up at lunch. What’s going on?”

“One of my first days of school, when I was just trying to fit in. Greg and Tyler were chasing me, who they thought was Eric down the hall. I ducked into an empty class room but it was the A.V. room and Pete was there. He hid me. He knew me as Eric but said that he wouldn’t tell.” Erika stated. “Lunch was an honest slip up. He said he liked me better as Erika.”

“He must like you, cuz that was an incredible save he did with you.”

“Pete had always been a great guy. He just prefers technology to human interaction.” Erika stated.

“Well, he interacted with humans enough to go to the basketball game and then see and understand what was going on with you.” Tricia buckled up. “I’m tired and hungry.”

--oOo--

“Mom?” Erika called from her bedroom. “Do I put makeup on?”

“You know? I’m not sure.” She leaned against the bedroom door frame. “I’d say put your normal amount on. If they want to fix it, they can. But make sure to bring your makeup with you.”

Erika nodded.

“How many outfits are you bringing?”

“Three.” Erika answered. “Is that enough?”

Her mother shrugged her shoulders. “This is all new to me too. Are you about ready to go?”

“I just need to put on my makeup. I’ll need ten minutes.”

Erika was still having a hard time wrapping her head around this whole modeling thing. The photographer had asked for her to sit for some photos today which she would then shop around with agencies and local businesses.

She finished brushing her eyelashes with the mascara wand and looked in the mirror. Her bangs were in need of a trim. She would have to ask her mother if she could get in with Sasha. Come to think of it, Tricia’s adorable fauxhawk pixie needed to be cut again. She mentally added a visit to Sasha as something to do before Christmas.

She double checked that she had the three outfits and everything she needed to go with them; earrings, shoes etc… She stuffed her makeup bag in the garment bag with everything else and hauled it down stairs. She slid into her ankle boots, pulled on her coat and joined her mother in the car.

“Hello, Erika?” a tall woman with dread locks greeted.

“Yes.” Erika answered. Well she did look like an artist. Strange layering of clothes, long dreadlocks, a nose ring and a few tattoos on her fore arms.

“I’m Bobbie.” She smiled. “I’m so glad that you came in. “Mrs. Martin.” She took Erika’s moms hand in greeting. “When I was going over the family photos, I was entranced with you.” She directed to Erika. “You have such enchanting eyes. I just had to give you a call and ask you to sit for me.”

Erika flushed. “I’m flattered.”

“Please, the two of you, come with me.” Bobbie led them through a set of doors to where they had done their family photos. She then took them through another set of doors into a much larger studio with many more lights, settings and props.

“Wow. I didn’t know this was back here.” Erika looked around in wonder.

“It’s for special shoots.” Bobbie explained. “I see you brought some clothes, great. I’ll be doing mostly torso and face shots, but I’ll need some body shots as well.”

“Just to be clear. There won’t be any explicit photos will there?”

“Heavens no.” Bobbie grinned. “First, she is a minor, It’s against the law. And second, I don’t work in that kind of field.

“Your makeup looks good, but I’ll have you put on a bit more. The camera tends to wash things out.”

Erika bit her lower lip, looking nervous.

“Tell you what.” I’ll help you out.” Bobbie laid a hand on her shoulder. “Mrs. Martin ….”

“Please, Nancy.”

“Nancy.” Bobbie smiled. “Please have a seat over here and make yourself comfortable. There is a Keurig over here with tea and coffee. You’ll be able to watch us as we prepare Erika.”

Bobbie led Erika over to a makeup counter with mirror and lights, just like she’d seen in movies. She switched on the lights which made Erika flinch until she became to the brightness.

Bobbie went through Erika’s makeup and helped her apply what she thought would look right for the pictures. Erika was starting to question Bobbie’s advice when the photographer stood back and smiled. “That will look amazing. Shall we start?”

“Sure.” Erika stepped away from the bright lights and mirror. “Is what I’m wearing okay?”

“It’s perfect for this first step. After all, we have to get comfortable with one another. Before we have you go changing.” Bobbie looked over at Erika’s mother. “Are you comfortable, Nancy?”

Her mother nodded with a smile.

“Okay, we are going to turn on some music, it’ll help you to move and hit poses.”

After just a few minutes, Bobbie asked her to loosen up. She was too stiff as if she was posing for senior pictures.

“Move some more, flick your hair, flirt with the camera. Pretend that the camera is your boyfriend.”
Erika grimaced.

“Okay, pretend that it is your girlfriend then.” Bobbie seemed unaffected by her preferences.

After a few more minutes Bobbie called a halt. “Do you have an outfit that you’d be more comfortable in?”” she asked.

“Sure.” Erika grabbed her bag. “Do you have a dressing room?”
Bobbie smirked. “If you are shy, you can use the bathroom.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Erika saw her mother start to get up.

“I’ve just never done this before.” She said. “I’ll be right back.”

A few moments later, Erika came back wearing a knee length, royal blue , pleated skirt and a white long sleeved blouse with lace that covered her cleavage and shoulders. She smiled to herself as her black three inch heels clicked across the floor.

“this is what you call more comfortable?” Bobbie raised an eyebrow.

Erika nodded with a smile. “I Like being a girl.”

“Okay. Shall we continue?”

Erika did feel more relaxed now, and Bobbie seemed to notice. After a few minutes, she called for a stop.

There are a bunch of props over there, how about you choose one.”

A few minutes later Erika came back with a bouquet of flowers. They may have been fake, but none but a trained eye would have been able to tell.

“Oooh, that’s good.” Bobbie smiled as Erika stuck a few poses. “Now you are getting the hang of it.”

Bobbie kept telling her how pretty she was, how amazing she was. Erika felt like she was glowing from all of the praise.

“Okay, good.” She lowered the camera. “let’s call that a wrap.” She plugged a cord from a laptop into the camera and pushed a couple buttons. “Oh, you can change if you want. This will only take a moment.”

“I’m fine.” Erika stated.

“Well then, here is your copy.” She handed the thumb drive to her mother. “Your husband requested it.” She turned back to Erika. “it was a pleasure meeting and working with you. Once we were able to break the ice, you were amazing. I’m sure we will be able to find you an agent and even a job or two soon.

“You really think so?” Mrs. Martin asked.

Bobbie locked her gaze. “I do.”

Erika switched out of her heels and back into her ankle boots, it was too icy outside to risk falling or twisting an ankle.

“You did very well.” Her mother told her once they reached the car. “what made you pick the flowers?”

“They were pretty and I thought they would go well with this outfit. Was that wrong?”

“No. it was just an unexpected choice. That’s all. You ready to see Dr. Barts?”

Erika shrugged “I guess.” In truth, she was excited and a little nervous to see her psychologist. She needed to talk to her about the visions that she was having during her ‘events’ as Pete called them. It sounded better than seizures.

“How are you, Erika?”

“honestly, on one level, I’m doing great. On another not so well.”

“I heard that you have had a couple of seizures.”

Erika nodded. “is it true what the Dr. said about them being caused by my brain healing?”

“Do you think that the Dr. would lie to you?”

“No, but sometimes they don’t always tell the whole truth either.”

“Do you have a concern?”

“A little.” She bit her bottom lip. “what if it never heals, and I have these seizures for the rest of my life?” her voice began to tremble. She took a deep breath. “they are not fun. They put me out of commission for at least a day.”

“I Won’t lie to you Erika, there is always the possibility that you may have these for the rest of your life. We just don’t know enough about the brain to know for sure. The good news is that there is medication out there that will help control it. Erika,” Dr. Barts made sure she had Erika’s attention. “I think you made the correct, adult, decision on having the tumor removed. No one could have foreseen the seizures as a side effect.”

Erika nodded fighting back tears.

“I’d like to tell you something in confidence. You can’t use this or say anything about this later, okay?”

Erika nodded

“I’ll need a verbal promise.”

“I promise.

Dr. Bart’s paused for a moment. “Your mother is having a hard time. She knows that getting the tumor removed was the right thing, but she feels guilty and slightly responsible for your seizures, by pressuring you to have the surgery.”

“I can tell.”

“Do you feel that she is responsible?”

“No.”

“it might go a long way in your relationship if you explained that to her.”

“Okay.” Erika agreed. “Dr. Barts? Do people experience hallucinations when having a seizure?”

“I’ve heard of such things, it’s possible. Have you experienced one?”

Erika described her two visions while having the seizures.

“They seemed so real. I felt what he felt saw what he saw.”

“interesting.” She remarked “as a psychologist I’d say that it is brought about by your subconscious. Perhaps a buried yearning of being a man with a family.”

“Seriously?”

“It’s possible. Remember the brain is the least understood devise known to man.”

Erika was frustrated. How could any part of her brain want to be a man? Been there done that. Being a girl was far better.

Erika dragged all of her stuff back upstairs. She changed out of her skirt and blouse hanging them back in the closet for later use. She reached under her trash can and retrieved two pills and quickly swallowed them before calling Tricia and Samantha and telling them all about the photo shoot.

“Erika,” her mother called. “I could use some help with dinner.”

“Gotta go. See you tomorrow.” She hung up. “Coming!

“Mom, could you help me?” Erika knocked on her mother’s door.

“Sure, what do you need?”

“Can you put my hair in pigtails? I can’t seem to get them even.”

“Sit down.” She took the proffered brush and began brushing through Erika’s curls.

“What do you want for Christmas?” she winced as her mom pulled hard.

“For my family to be happy.”

“I am happy, mom.” Erika stated. “I’m happier than I have been in years.”

“Are you?” her mother began wrapping an elastic around one section of hair.

Erika fought the need to nod her head. “yes. I have great friends, a girlfriend, I can finally relax at school because I’m not getting picked on so my grades are belter. And a mother and father who love me. Even if they aren’t thrilled with some of my choices.”

Her mother stopped for a moment then continued with her hair.

“I want you to be happy, Erika, I just don’t always think this choice is the right one.” She finished her pigtails.

“I know momma.”

“I wanted a girl too.” Her mother wrapped her arms around her. “In fact, soon after you were born, I got pregnant again.” She sighed. “I Had a miss carriage in the fifth month. It was to be a girl.”

Erika turned and looked at her mother’s sad face. “I didn’t know that.”

“it’s a hurtful subject and many people don’t like to talk about it.”

Erika wrapped her arms around her mother and squeezed. “That must have been horrible.”

“I couldn’t dwell on it. “I had a precocious little boy to look after.” She gave Erika a weak smile.

“now you have had both.” Erika got up

“It’s not the same.”

Erika didn’t hear that last part, she had already left the room. She went back to her bathroom and pulled out two long ribbons which she tied around each sprig of hair. She applied her mascara and combed down her bangs so that her eyelashes occasionally brushed them.

Okay, mom, we’re going shopping. “Erika announced when she heard Samantha’s horn honk.

Erika huddled down into her coat against the sharp, cutting cold. She nearly broke all records for the fastest car entry.

“Let’s go”

“We should have done this a few weeks ago.” Samantha whined. “the mall is going to be packed.

“It’ll be more festive.” Tricia corrected

Erika could hardly believe just how crowded the mall was. There was a line of cars just trying to get into the parking lot. After close to thirty minutes they finally found a parking space in the very back of the lot. It was going to be a long cold walk to get inside the mall

Tricia took her hand as the trudged across the parking lot. “how are you feeling today?” she asked.

“Good, why?”

“The last time we were here you had your first seizure.”

“I was trying to forget.” Erika sighed.

“You’ve been quiet in the car. What’s going on in that brain of yours?”

“My mom and I had a moment while She was doing my hair.”

“It’s very cute.”

Erika smiled “she told me that after I was born that she miscarried a little girl.”

“Oooh, That’s rough.” Samantha joined them

Tricia gave her hand a lingering squeeze.

“She said that she ‘didn’t dwell on it’. My becoming Erika probably brought up some hidden emotions.”

“You think that is why she rejected you at first?” Samantha asked.

Erika shook her head. “I don’t know. “

“How are you doing with this information? “

Erika shrugged. A little sad, but I was too young to know and she was never born, so…. I don’t know what to feel.”

Walking through the doors of the mall was like being slapped in the face by a cacophony of noise. The Christmas music was nearly drowned out by screaming kids, women heals clicking on the tile, and thousands of people talking and calling out to one another. It was so mad, that she and Tricia came to an abrupt halt just inside the door

“holy crap!” Tricia gasped.

“Still think its festive?” Samantha snickered.

The people were moving like a massive herd of water buffalo like she had seen on Animal Planet, surging and morphing, ever on the move.

With her eyes wide with fear she turned to Samantha. “Where do we go?”

“Stay behind me. Hold on to this,” She handed Tricia an end to a belt on her coat.

Samantha charged in with no fear. The two others felt like they were hanging on for dear life.

The girls, working their way through the crowd went from store to store. Erika was starting to get frustrated. She was having a difficult time finding her mother and father something for Christmas. She had found a few things that caught her eye, but nothing that was perfect. Of course, she found lots of things that she liked for herself.

They were closing in on the food court when Erika spotted Santa sitting in a large chair while screaming kids were placed on his lap for pictures.

“That’s it!” she exclaimed. “I’ll get my photo with Santa for my parents”

“Look at the line,” Trisha groaned.

“Sorry, but this will be my only chance.” Erika begged.

“We can get our picture together.” Samantha grinned.

The three friends queued up in the serpentine line. Erika realized that the line was approaching the fountain that Eric had been pushed into. Her heart started to beat faster and she began looking around more and more as they crept closer and closer.

“What is wrong?” Tricia whispered in her ear.

“Just before school started, I was pushed into that fountain.” Erika quickly told her the story of that horrific day, of the raccoon eyes, of her mother’s dismissal.

Tricia gave her a long, gentle embrace, slowly rubbing her back. “that won’t happen today. We are getting our pictures with Santa.” She pulled back and gave Erika a loving smile.

“Hey guys,” Samantha got their attention. “look who’s in line.” She pointed, “Weird Stephanie.”

“The one who always wears cats on her clothes?” Tricia searched through the queue behind them.

“That’s the one. She’s in my chemistry class.” Samantha shivered. “She gives me the creeps.”

Sorrow and embarrassment boiled up in Erika. Especially when she started to snicker. Then she just got mad at herself. “leave her alone Sam.” She pointedly used the name Samantha hated. She lowered her voice. “I was like her last year. Did you say things like that about me?”

“Of course, not.” Samantha went on the defensive.

“Cut her some slack. Her mother is poor and probably has to make her clothes.” Erika scowled at her friend. “I can only imagine what your friends said about me.”

Samantha blanched and looked away.

Erika immediately regretted how that came out her mouth. She touched Samantha’s arm. “I’m sorry. That came out harsher than I thought.”

“No, you are right.” Samantha forced a smile. “It’s just, sometimes I forget that you were in that position.”

“Next.” Santa’s helper called.

Erika explained that she wanted a solo picture and then one with all three.

This had to have been the best Santa she had ever seen. He didn’t wear the typical red Santa jacket and pants, but instead wore a soft flannel shirt with a Christmas print and velvet short pants. Something Santa might wear around the house. His hair and beard were real, all though his hair was looking sparse, his beard was long, and fluffy.

Erika slid off her coat and handed it to Tricia. She wore a red sweater dress over white tights and black flats.

“Oh, my goodness you look adorable.” Tricia squealed.

Erika flushed red, but was pleased.

As she was walking up to the Jolly elf, she realized that as a boy she would have been too embarrassed to have gotten in line let alone have her picture taken with him. The thought thrilled her more than she’d have thought.

“Ho, ho, ho.” He greeted. “Have you been a good girl this year?”

Erika grinned, “what would be the fun in that, Santa?” She shrugged her shoulders.

St. Nick lost his ho,hos and chuckled.

Erika smiled for the picture, but it was quite difficult because the elf became more dirty than jolly.

Once the picture was taken, Erika wagged her finger “I’m telling Mrs. Clause.”

Tricia and Samantha joined her, all gathering close to the dirty Santa.

Once the picture was taken, the girls went to the purchasing counter.

A scream followed by a splash and laughing captured their attention. Erika looked over to see a soaking wet Stephanie struggling to get out of the very fountain that Eric had been pushed into.

Racing through the throng of people, she made out the backs of Greg and Tyler.
Erika hurried over to Stephanie and took the girls hand and helped her out.

“Are you alright?” Erika was fighting flashbacks of her own.

Sputtering and crying, Stephanie hissed, “You did this to me!”
“What? No.” Erika blanched.

“It was those two jerks, Greg and Tyler.” Tricia appeared next to her.

“I know who you are, plague.” Stephanie growled “ever since You disappeared, I have been their target. This!” She screamed looking down at her soaking clothes. “This is your fault!”

Erika turned white. If Samantha hadn’t caught her arm, she as certain that she’d have crumpled to the floor “This is not your fault.” She insisted in Erika’s ear.

Erika took a deep breath and steeled herself. “Let’s get you dried off.” Her calm voice had an edge to it as she began pulling Stephanie towards the bathroom.

“What are you doing? “Tricia demanded, “She knows.”

Mall security showed up “what is happening here.”

“Two thugs pushed her into the fountain!” Samantha pointed the direction the two football players escaped.

“Officer, could you please bring some towels to the bathroom?” Erika asked .

“Why? Tricia said under her breath.

“We’ll need to take a statement.” the officer stated.

“After she is dry.” Samantha told him. She followed Erika dragging Stephanie.”

“Leave me alone.” Stephanie tried pulling her hand away.

“We are trying to help.” Erika pushed her towards the sink.

“I don’t want your help, Eric.”

Erika flinched.

“Just leave her alone, Erika.” Tricia pulled on Erika’s arm.

Erika looked really hard at Stephanie. She pitied the girl, no she empathized with her, but why didn’t she want any help? She knew who she was, or had been the plague, perhaps knew for a while and hadn’t outed her. To come right down to it, Stephanie was a loose end and Erika needed to figure out why Stephanie hadn’t blown her new identity.

Erika turned on Tricia. “I told you that I was in this same situation just a few months ago, instead of anyone helping me, everyone laughed. I’m not going to let another suffer what I have.”

“But she said she doesn’t want your help?”

“I don’t care.” She turned back to Stephanie, “Let’s get you out of these wet clothes.” Erika reached out.

“Don’t touch me, pervert.” Stephanie batted her hand away.

“Towels are here.” Samantha came in.

Erika turned towards Samantha, gave Tricia a glance. “Please help her. I’ll go outside. She obviously doesn’t want my help.” She bit her lower lip.

Tricia rolled her eyes, but accepted a towel from Samantha.

Erika pushed her way out of the bathroom and leaned against the wall. She looked to the heavens with closed eyes. Is this what my life will be? Always fighting uphill? Always the outcast?

“Excuse me miss.” The security guard approached, “How long will this take?”

“As long as it does! She was just humiliated in your mall,” Erika lost her temper.

The guard put up his hand and in defense and backed away.

Erika was a little surprised at her own boldness. Eric would have shrunk in on himself and taken a submissive position. Erika however seemed to be finding her own voice.

A few minutes later her curiosity got the best of her. She stuck her head into the bathroom door. “How’s it going?” she asked above the sound of the air dryers.

Tricia shrugged, “You need to stay out.” She shooed Erika away.

Erika went back to her spot on the wall. The security guy took so step towards her, but retreated with the gaze Erika shot his way.

- - -

When the three finally emerged, Stephanie’s long dark hair had been French braided, her sweater no longer dripping wet was still damp as well as her pants which she wrapped a towel around. Tricia looked to have done Stephanie’s makeup which looked a bit heavier than Stephanie normally wore it.

The look she gave Erika wasn’t as full of hate, but it wasn’t friendly either. In silence, the security guard walked them to the security office. Erika took up the rear. After giving their statements, the girls left.

“Do you need a ride home?” Samantha offered.

Stephanie shook her head, “I drove.”

“We’ll walk you to your car.” Erika instructed.

“I’m fine.” Stephanie’s voice was heated, but sounded more emotionally drained.

“Well are going to make sure those ass holes don’t try something else.” Erika insisted.

It was just as cold out as it was when they had come in. Erika felt for Stephanie in her still damp clothes.

“why?” Stephanie asked Erika.

“Why what?” Erika needed more

“Why are you dressing like a girl? Why would you want to be a girl? And why would you help me?”

Erika was silent for a few seconds. “Those first two questions are the reason why I am seeing a psychologist.” She paused. “I know what it is like being bullied, having to always be looking over your shoulder, trying to remain invisible so as to not attract more bad attention. Luckily, I found two incredible people who decided to help me. Stephanie, I’m sorry that you are getting bullied. I didn’t know. Now that I do, I’ll do my best to help.”

“Me too.” Samantha stated. “I’m tired of those immature Neanderthal ruining people’s lives.”

“Stephanie, you’ll keep Erica’s secret, won’t you?” Tricia pleaded.

Stephanie looked at each in turn. “I haven’t decided yet.” She stood next to an old beat up car. “I need to go home.”

Erika waved good bye and the three walked to Samantha’s car.

“Damn!” Erika pulled up. “I forgot our pictures.”

“Call and ask them to hold them for you.” Samantha got into the car.

“How did shopping go?” Erica’s mother asked at the dinner table.

“It was so crowded; it was impossible to shop.” Erika tucked into her steaming bowl of chili.

“I heard from the photographer.” her father looked at her mother. “It seems that Erika has got her first client. If she wants it.”

Erika looked in askance at her mom. “Can I mom?”

Her mother looked from her to her father “Do they know that she is…. “

“I hardly think it matters.” Her father finished.

“Couldn’t it be fraud, or false advertising?”

“Who would know?” He raised an eyebrow, “It’s not like she’ll be modeling lingerie, or bathing suits.”

“When?” Erika was so excited, she almost bounced in her seat.

“Bobbie is scheduling you for after school in a couple of days. It might interfere with rally.” He warned.

Erica’s face fell. “I’m already a liability to the squad. Can she do it another time?”

“I’ll check.”

“Um, what will she be modeling for, exactly?”

“I’m not exactly sure. I was told it was for a local company.”

“What should I wear?”

“Bobbie said that wardrobe, hair and makeup would be provided.”

Erika had to swallow a squeal. Her mother would not approve of such at the dinner table.

Erika didn’t taste her food; she was so excited to tell Tricia and Samantha. She was about to head upstairs when her mother brought her to a stop.

“I cooked, young lady, you clean.”

Erika groaned and stomped into the kitchen. At least it wasn’t spaghetti night. Spaghetti sauce usually, somehow ended up everywhere.

Erika rinsed the last pot and set it aside to dry. “Good?” she asked her mother.

“Yes, thank you. “

Erika raced very unladylike up to her bedroom and called her friends.

----

Her dad knocked on the door before entering, “I just got off the phone with Bobbie. Your shoot is scheduled for Saturday morning. I’ll drive you there.”

Erika jumped up and hugged her father, “Thank you, Daddy.”

“It sounds exciting, doesn’t it?”

Erika nodded.

“Okay, good night.”

Erika started to get ready for bed, but decided she should probably shave. Going 2 days without shaving was one thing. Any more than that would feel disgusting, and it had already been two.

Shaving one’s legs was time consuming, but Erika couldn’t figure out why so many girls complained about it. How could anyone not like the feeling of satin smooth legs? Especially slipping in to clean sheets right after.

Erika’s mind Was too excited to sleep. She was going to be a model. Eight months ago, she was Eric, the plague. Defiled, spit upon, unaccepted by his peers. A loner without purpose, destined to be a nobody. Six months ago, he had been kicked to summer camp to suffer at the hands of who knows, only to be saved by his best friend’s sister, who promised a safe summer, but he’d have to dress and take on the persona of a girl. How could Eric have known that not only did he feel safe, but that he enjoyed being a girl. Eric went to school as Erika and with the help of her friends was able to switch identities. It seems that she has passed so well that she was now starting a career as a model. It sounded too good to be true, it sounded like a strange story one would find on some story website.

Erika finally drifted off to sleep

Erika found herself in a large warehouse. Larger than the one that Bobbie had used for her first photo shoot. Three back drop areas had been set up one white, one a green screen, and the last a winter Wonderland with fake trees dotting its area.

“Erika, darling, you’ve made it” Sasha held his hands out in greeting. “You look fabulous.”

“Sasha,” Erika kissed both of his cheeks.

Erika found herself sitting in front of the brightly lit dressing mirror, her hair was full of voluminous curls, her makeup a work of art.

“We are ready for you Ms. Summers Bobbie smiled from the camera in front of the white backdrop. Wearing a bejeweled evening gown, Erika paraded over as smooth as if she was sliding on ice even though she was wearing five-inch stiletto heels. She turned with a whip of her hips and the train of the gown swirled into place around her ankles.

“Perfect.” Bobbie gushed.

Large fans came on and gentle breeze moved her hair as she moved and posed.

Smoke wafted in with the gentle breeze created by the fans. At first, she thought someone was barbecuing, but the smell wasn’t right. She continued moving and posing, she was a professional after all. The loud beeping of a delivery truck sounded just out of sight. This was a photo shoot; didn’t people know to keep those kinds of noises away? The smell became thicker, stronger. She suppressed a cough and hit another pose. The sound of the delivery truck relented. How far was it having to back up? This was becoming ridiculous.

“This is becoming unbearable; will someone please find out where that smoke is coming from? And turn off that blasted alarm!”

No one answered. The smell became stronger. She could no longer contain it. She began coughing,

“Someone please turn off that alarm and do something about this smoke!” she coughed more violently.

A loud smashing of glass jarred Erika awake. Her room was full of smoke but what looked like a flashlight tried to penetrate through it.

“I’ve got her.” A muffled voice called. “Erika! I’m with the fire department, I’m here to get you out!”

Erika’s mind was in a fog and trying to run a million miles per hour. The smoke she was breathing in was making anything but breathing a priority. Fire?

“Mom! Dad!” she called out and caused another coughing fit.

“They are safe outside.” The fire fighter scooped her up in his arms and carried her towards her window which had been shattered. The difference in air quality was a blessing as well as a curse. Even though it was fresh air, it was freezing cold out and all she had on were her pajamas.

Although muffled by her bedroom door, Erika could hear the roar, crackling and popping of an enormous fire.

“Are you able to climb down this ladder?” the fireman asked.

Erika looked out of her window to the very tall ladder reaching up from the ground below. Another firefighter was half way down the ladder and looking up, watching her and his team member.

Erika had another coughing spell, but nodded. She after all was a monkey when it came to climbing through rope ladders, bridges and obstacles.

The firefighter helped her on to the ladder and she quickly repelled down, one wrung at a time as the other firefighter regressed as she went.

She cursed the fact that she didn’t have time to put on her slippers or shoes. Even socks would have been a help against the ice-cold ladder.

Erika gulped in more fresh air and coughed out smoke that seemed to linger in her lungs. How did smokers do this to their lungs on purpose?

The ground was just as cold as the ladder. Erika bounced from one foot to the other trying to keep her feet from too much pain.

Erika looked up at the house which was lit by the lights of emergency vehicles and street lights. Dark smoke billowed from her house skyward. Light and shadow flickered about through the windows as flames continued to eat up her home.

She was numb. She knew this feeling, or a feeling like it, it was the numbness of the flagpole incident, the pushed into a fountain in a mall numb. The I can’t allow myself to feel, or I’ll go insane numb.

“I’m going to carry you out to the front, Darling. You aren’t wearing any shoes.” The firefighter beside her informed before he effortlessly scooped her up into his strong arms and strode with purpose around the side of the house.

A cacophony of chaos crashed down upon her as they rounded to the front of the house. Fire trucks, ambulances, police cars and many people in uniform running around. She frantically searched for her mom and dad.

With a second scan of the helter-skelter, and squinting through the bright lights, she found her parents by the ambulance.

“Erika!” her mother called out, “Oh thank God you’re alright!”

The firefighter set her down on the iced over blacktop not far from her parents.

“Momma, Daddy.” She called.

“We couldn’t get to you.” Her mother began to sob. “We tried yelling to wake you, but you didn’t respond. I…. I…. I thought I had lost you.” Her mother wrapped her up in her arms hugging her.

“I’m okay momma.” Erika tried to disengage from her mother’s death grip.

Finally, her mother let her go. Erika looked from her to her father. Both of their faces were black with soot and streaked from tears.

Her father removed an oxygen mask and pulled her into a hug as well. “I couldn’t reach you. Our bedroom was blocked off by the fire. Oh, sweet heart. I am so glad to see you.”

“Sit up here.” A paramedic instructed. “I’ve got a blanket for your legs and I’ll need to take your vitals.

“What happened?” Erika asked.

“We aren’t sure.” Her father shrugged, tears still glistened in his eyes. “The smoke detector woke us up. By the time I reached our bedroom door the fire had cut us off from you.”

“What started the fire?” she scanned both of her parents.

Her father shook his head as her mother clung to his arm.

“I’ll need you to put this on and breathe for a few minutes the paramedic handed Erika an oxygen mask.

Erika looked over to see large sprays of water dousing flames that had erupted through the roof of the house.

“My stuff.” Erika’s heart hurt. “My computer, my clothes, my medication.”

“Everything can be replaced.” Her father sighed.

“Our photo albums, our genealogy,” her mother paused then started sobbing. “My grandmother’s china.”

Suddenly her computer and clothing didn’t seem like a lost. Her mother’s family keepsakes, passed down through the generations were currently in what used to be one of her few safe havens.

Her father took a deep breath and let out a long sigh that bordered on a heart wrenching sob. “We are all alive. Nothing else is important.”

“But daddy, your grandfather’s war medals, his letters.” Erika’s chest felt like it was going to burst.

“Oh, no.” Erika’s mother wailed. “You grandparent’s letters.”

Her father pulled her mother in to a very tight embrace. “It doesn’t matter.” He stated. “It doesn’t matter.” He repeated as if to reinforce it to himself.

Erika tore off her mask and joined her father’s embrace.

“Erika, it’s time to get up.” She heard her mother’s voice over the rumble of a semi passing by on the freeway.

She opened her eyes. “I was hoping it was all a bad dream.” Erika wanted to cry again but her eyes were cried out.

“I know, sweetie.” Her mother sat down on the bed and brushed her bangs out of her eyes. “Time to see Sasha again.” She stated. “Did you get any sleep?”

Erika shook her head. Some of her bangs fell back into her eyes. “Maybe an hour or two. What happens now? We can’t live in a hotel forever.”

“Your father is talking to the fire department and insurance company as we speak.”

“My phone.” Erika moaned. “Damn it, I wasn’t able to get my phone. I don’t have any of my friend’s numbers. What if they are trying to get ahold of me? How am I going to get ahold of them?”

Her mother tried to soothe her. “We will all be getting new phones today.”

Erika brightened a little bit. “Can I get the new Android?”

Her mother smiled, “We’ll have to ask you father. I’m not sure what all our insurance will cover.” She looked down at Erika. “We will have to get us at least a week’s worth of clothes.”

“My Rally squad uniform was in my closet.” Erika closed her eyes and groaned. “Melanie and Taylor are going to kill me.”

“You couldn’t have foreseen this happening.” Her mother sighed. “I’m sure they and the school will understand.”

“Speaking of which.” Erika searched the hotel room for a clock. She finally spotted it’s red digital numbers. “I take it I’m not going to school today.”

Her mother shook her head. “We all had a rough night, we all need clothes and to figure out what our immediate needs are, then we can work from there.”

Erika rolled over then smiled. “At least I had my breast forms on.”

Her mother rolled her eyes and smiled. Erika giggled.

“Okay, young lady. I’ve already had my shower. It’s your turn. I’ll go get your pajamas from the dryer. Unfortunately, we will be going to our first store in our PJs.”

“I had a shower a few hours ago,” Erika wrapped a sheet around her as she got out of bed.

“That was to get the soot and grime off, this will help make you feel clean and refreshed. We are going to be very busy over the next few days.”

Erika sighed as she walked into the hotel room bathroom.

Her mother was correct, the shower ended up being just the thing to help wake her up and make her feel fresh. As she dried herself, she checked the edges of her breast forms. She was okay for a couple of days, but she’d have to order some glue as soon as she found a computer and credit card. She didn’t sleep in her gaff therefore, it too had burned up. Something else she’d have to replace. She’d just have to be careful.

Scrunching her hair while looking in the mirror, Erika added makeup to one of the first things she’d have to replace, along with regular hygiene stuff.

---

“It’s only to get something to wear to get out of our pajamas.” Her mother promised.

“It’s still Wal-Mart.” Erika protested.

“I don’t want us traipsing through one of the nice department stores in our underwear. “We’ll just get one outfit and some toiletries.”

Erika rolled her eyes. “Fine.” She pushed open the door and immediately wished for her coat. Her feet were still cold, but her mother had purchased some cheap flip-flops for her until they were able to get clothing.

Her father had come back from his meeting with the fire department and insurance company. He set two flip phones on the table and flopped into the chair.

“What are these?” Erika picked one up. “These are so…. so, archaic.”

“They are temporary.” He rubbed at his red, overly tired eyes. “Our numbers have all been programed in already. We’ll look into getting real phones in the next day or two.”

“How did it go?” her mother inquired.

“As well as can be expected.” Her father yawned. “I need a nap.”

“Were you able to go to the bank?” her mother approached her father from behind and began rubbing his shoulders and the back of his neck.

“Yes.” He pulled out an envelope. “I guess we are getting Christmas early this year. Just get the basics for now. New credit cards have been ordered. The bank put a rush on it, but it will still be a few days, but more likely a week. The insurance company still has to do an investigation and paperwork before they write us a check.”

“I used the hotel phone and called our Doctors. I’ll be picking up all of our meds this later.”

“Even my blockers?” Erika was concerned.

Her mother nodded. “Yes, even your blockers.”

“Thank you.”

“Honey, you take a nap for a few hours. Erika and I’ll go get started on getting some clothing.” She helped her husband to his feet and wrapped her arms around him. “I Love you. I don’t know what I would do if I had lost you.” She looked over to Erika. “Either one of you.” She held her arm out for Erika to join them.

---

Erika did her best to run in grab what she needed and got out of Wal-Mart. She exited the store wearing some skinny jeans, a soft blue hoodie, new bra and panties, socks, and a pair of white ‘Keds’ looking knock off tennis.

“Mom?” Erika looked thoughtful as they pulled out of the parking lot. “Can we drive by the house?”

Her mother shook her head, “Your father said it wouldn’t be a good idea. He said that the fire department is still keeping an eye on it to make sure that the fire is out.”

“Just to look at it?” She inquired.

“I really don’t think it would be a good idea, honey. Perhaps tomorrow.”

Erika sighed. “It sucks that they cut the rope course.”

“They had to make sure that the fire wouldn’t spread.”

“I know, but it still sucks.”

Her mother put her hand on Erika’s knee. “This whole thing sucks, honey. But we have each other.”

Erika looked out the window, wishing she had her phone instead of the outdated one that they were to use temporarily.

“You hungry?” her mother asked.

“No, Thanks.” Erika shrugged.

“Okay, lets hit up Macy’s for some clothes.”

Erika nodded. She really wanted Samantha to be the one to go shopping with her. But she doubted that her mother would have just given her money to run off with her girlfriends with.

“I know how we can make this fun.” Her mother smiled at her.

Erika wanted to roll her eyes. “What?”

“You are going to pick out an outfit for me, and I’m going to pick one out for you.”

“Huh?”

“One complete outfit.” Her mother nodded. “We will see how one would like to see the other. We can wear them out to dinner tonight with your father.”

Erika thought for a moment. It would be kind of fun to pick out something for her mother. It wasn’t like her mother wore frumpy house dresses or anything, but it could be fun. “On one condition,” Erika stated. “You aren’t dressing me in boy clothes.”

“I promise.” Her mother’s smile got bigger. “And you won’t make me look like a hooker.”

“Mom.” Erika protested.

“I’m just saying.” She pulled the car up to valet parking. Although still crowded, it was nowhere near as busy as it had been the other day.

“What is my budget?” Erika asked as the two entered the store.

“We need to only get the essentials at this time. Your father wiped out the savings so that we can get some clothes. We’ll be limited on money until the insurance makes good.” Her mother looked at Erika. “Count what you are wearing as one outfit. You are allowed eight or so outfits.”

“And If I can work the sales rack?”

“We’ll see.

Erika tried to channel her ‘inner Samantha’ She found two pairs of pants on the sales rack almost immediately. One was a high-end designer brand that had been marked down. One sweater, Two button Cardigans, four blouses, a black pencil skirt and a baby blue dress with a peter pan collar, capped sleeves and lace along the knee length hem. She had the sales associate hold them while she went in search of an outfit for her mother.

The task of dressing her mother was proving a little more difficult than she thought. There were so many different looks that she wanted to try out, and she kept getting distracted, finding clothes for herself. Once she found the perfect skirt, she began building the outfit. A button-down blouse with little in the way of ornamentation but a lot of tailoring. After calling her mother to find out what size she wore, Erika rounded up black boots, black nylons and accessories, then took them to a dressing room and put it all together for her mother.

“Are you in here, Erika?” Her mother called as she was finishing up.

“Yes. I’ve got your outfit in here.” Erika peeked through the dressing room door.

Her mother smiled. “I’ve got yours down in the one on the end.”

“I’d like to see yours first.” Erika slid out of the dressing room closed the door behind her and smiled at her mother.

“Okay.” Her mother smiled. “But you can’t see yours until after I’m done.” She entered the dressing room and closed the door behind her. “Seriously?” her mother asked once she saw the outfit.

“You promised.” Erika stated, “Besides this was your idea.”

“Isn’t this a bit young for me?” her mother complained.

“You aren’t that old, mom.” Erika rolled her eyes. “Besides you dress too much like a soccer mom. Believe me, Dad will love this.”

A few minutes later, her mother emerged from the dressing room with a big smile on her face. She white tailored blouse showed her mother’s fabulous curves, the leopard print pencil skirt accentuated her hips and added some young sexiness. If it had been summer, Erika would have picked out black heals, however it being close to Christmas, the black, heeled boots were more appropriate as well as sexy. Amber bracelets, necklace and earrings finished off the look.

“I do like this.” She nodded. “but can I really pull it off?”

“You look amazing.” Erika took her mother to the floor length dressing room mirror. She stood next to her mother. “Dad is going to go nuts.”

“A deal is a deal.” Her mother nodded. “Now it’s your turn.”

Erika’s heart was beating stronger than she’d have thought. It was just some clothes that her mother picked out for her. How bad could it be?

She pushed the door open and saw the outfit for the first time. Her heart leaped. “Oh my word! Mother, it’s so adorable.”

“Try it on.” Her mother prompted.

Erika closed the door and stripped out of her Wal-Mart clothing and began donning the outfit her mother had picked out.

She pulled on gray leggings then stepped into a charcoal gray mini circle skirt then slipped a royal blue V-neck sweater over her head. Erika sat down on the bench and slid her feet into gray knee high boots with a two-inch heel and zipped them up. She stood then spun around in front of the mirror and giggled.

“Well?” her mother asked from outside.

Erika stepped out and pulled down on the length of the short skirt. “I love it.” She beamed. “But isn’t the skirt a bit short?”

Her mother looked her up and down, and shook her head, “I think it’s darling. You’ll just have to remember to keep your legs together or crossed when you sit.” Her mother looked down at the outfit she was wearing then at Erika’s. “I say we change, buy the clothes we have then get something to eat.”

Erika nodded in agreement.

She and her mother with arms loaded, walked out the valet parking and had the attendant pull their car around. After loading up the trunk, the two re-entered the mall.

Erika had ditched her cheap white tennis shoes for the gray boots which clicked as they walked down the tiled Mall towards the food court.

“I need to pick something up at the Santa place.” Erika redirected their direction slightly.

“Oh?” her mother was surprised.

“Oh good, you came back.” The clerk at the Santa station greeted.

“So, you held them?” Erika asked.

“Yes.” The clerk reached into a filing folder and pulled out a package and handed them to Erika.

“How much?” Erika asked.

“No charge.”

“What? Really?” Erika questioned.

“We saw what you did to help out that young lady the other day. My manager instructed us not to charge you in the spirit of Christmas.”

“That is so kind of you.” Erika’s mother thanked her.

Once they were away, her mother looked to Erika. “What did you do?”

Erika explained the Stephanie situation

“I’m proud of you.” Her mother beamed. “It takes courage and good character to stand up and help someone in that situation.”

Erika shrugged her shoulders. “I just remember how I felt when it used to happen to me. I don’t want anyone else to feel that.”

Erika found herself wrapped up in her mother’s arms. “You are such a beautiful person, Erika.”

After they had eaten a light lunch, Erika pulled out the folder and slid out the picture of the three friends gathered around Santa. Erika smiled as she looked at the three of them together. She showed her mother who agreed that it was a great photo. Erika then pulled out the solo picture.

“I was going to give this to you and Dad for Christmas, but since Christmas is up in the air, I may as well give it to you now.” She slid the picture over to her mother.

Her mother’s hand went to her mouth. She looked up from the picture, tears filled her eyes and were running down her cheek unheeded.

“What’s wrong?” Erika was anxious. Had she done something wrong?

“It’s perfect.” Her mother smiled. “We lost all of our photos in the fire, and now we have our first Christmas photo of you, Erika.” She dabbed the tears from her eyes and face. “It’s perfect. Thank you.”

Erika felt a little funny. Who was this person sitting across from her? Her mother not only showed no signs of disgust towards her, but showed nothing but love and support all day. It was kind of freaking her out.

She and her mother hit up a few shoe stores on the way to another department store. Where they added two pairs of flats and a set of heels to her small but burgeoning wardrobe.

“Okay.” Her mother grinned at her. “Have you ever had your makeup done before, other than by your girlfriends?”

Erika shook her head.

Her mother smiled big. “Let’s get to it.

----

Erika looked in the mirror at herself and was in absolute awe. She looked amazing, even better than after Bobbie had touched her up at the photo shoot. She just wondered if she could replicate it at home. Sure, the makeup artist explained what she was doing, but there was just so much involved, she didn’t know if she could remember it all.

Then to top it all off, her mother bought each of them most of what was used on their faces. Almost four hundred dollars on makeup. Erika’s mind whirled at the thought of spending that much on makeup. She looked in the mirror again and decided that the money was well spent.

“How was your day?” Her father asked as they entered their hotel room with arms loaded with bags of clothing.

“We got a lot done.” Her mother stated.

“I actually had fun.” Erika smiled at her mother then her father.

“We didn’t forget about you, either.” Her mother kissed her husband. “Shirts, ties, slacks, underwear, socks, toiletries.” Her mother listed.

“Thank you.” He included Erika in his smile. “Shall we go eat?”

“We,” Erika’s mother looked to her, “Have to change first.”

“What’s wrong with what you have on?”

Erika giggled. “You’ll see.”

A few minutes later, her mother emerged from the bathroom. Erika grinned at her mother when she saw her father’s jaw hit the floor. “Told you.”

“You don’t think it’s too young?” her mother asked her father.

All he could do is shake his head.

“You two go out.” Erika decided. “I’ll grab a burger at the diner next door.”

“You sure?” Her mother asked.

“Oh yeah, I’m sure.” Erika winked at her mother.

Samantha, Victoria, Tricia and Krystal, holding hands with Jorge were all out in front of the school waiting for her as her mother pulled up.

Erika decided to wear the outfit her mother picked out for her. She did her best to imitate what the makeup artist had done and instead of wearing her curls, she decided to flat iron her hair.

She stepped out of the car and waited as her mother pulled away revealing her standing in her new look. Jorge and Tricia’s jaws hit the ground.

“Oh my God!” Tricia came around. “Here we thought you’d be all burned up like two face or something and you come back looking like…. Well like the model that you are.” She wrapped her arms around Erika and caressed her lips in a long embrace.

“Where did you find that outfit?” Samantha seemed a bit jealous.

“You’d never believe that my mother picked it out for me.”

“Seriously?”

Erika nodded. She leaned over and spoke only for Samantha to hear. “My mom has been acting very strange. It’s like she has finally accepted me as Erika. We spent most of the day getting new wardrobes because ours are… well, gone.”

“Well?” Victoria interrupted. “Tell us what happened.”

“Can we at least get somewhere warm?” Erika protested. “It’s a bit cold out here.”

Erika suppressed a smile and barely suppressed a laugh as one Junior tripped over the curb, a Freshman bumped into someone in front of him almost causing them both to land in a pile on the ground, and a senior stepped face first into a door.

“That’s right.” Tricia beamed. “My girlfriend is the hottest in the school.”

Once in the library, Erika briefed them all on what had happened the night of the fire.

“Saved by a handsome firefighter?” Victoria’s eyes flashed.

“Everything we owned burned up.” Erika reminded her. “Everything. All I had were my pajamas.”

“I’m sorry.” Victoria apologized. “Do they know what started the fire?”

Erika shook her head. “I haven’t heard yet.”

“You will be at Rally practice tonight, right?” Krystal asked.

“Yes. Although my Rally uniform was in the house.”

Samantha, Krystal, and Jorge all groaned.

“So we need to find Melanie before class starts so that she can find or order you a new one.” Samantha stood up. “We don’t have much time.”

The three best friends entered Mrs. Anderson’s class.

“I knew you were smoking hot,” Jake grinned, “But did you have to burn your house down?”

“Shut up, Jerk.” Samantha slapped him across the back of the head.

“She nearly died in that fire, Jerk off.” Tricia swung, but Jake dodged.

“My family lost everything.” Erika pulled back to slap him as well, but froze. Jake flinched back anyway to the delight of others in the class.

“Alright, everyone, take your seats.” Mrs. Anderson called. “Ms. Summers, I’m glad to see that you are safe.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Anderson.”

“Your mom really pick that out for you?” Samantha whispered.

Erika nodded.

“Wow.” Samantha mouthed. “Where did you find the boots?”

Erika turned to face her. “The whole outfit was at Macy’s.”

“Would you mind if I got a pair of boots like that?” she whispered back.

“Why would I mind?” Erika frowned.

Tricia leaned closer. “It’s a girl thing. And by the way… I want to borrow that skirt.”

“I know, right?” Samantha nodded.

“Girls!” Mrs. Anderson raised her voice a little louder than normal. “Shall I have you share what you are whispering to the whole class?”

Erika turned bright red. Samantha shook her head.

“Zip it then.”

-------

“Are you really doing a photo shoot tomorrow?” Krystal asked as they walked to the gym for Rally and Cheer practice.

“It sounds so surreal, right?” Erika nodded.

“Do they know?”

Erika shook her head. “My dad says they don’t need to.

“What will you be advertising?”

Erika shrugged. “I’m not sure yet.”

“I’d think that would be important.” Krystal opened the door to the gym. The Cheer squad’s music was blasting and echoing through the gym. Taylor and Jordon were working on some new stuff. Taylor’s multitude of braids swung and bounced around her shoulders. Samantha and Melinda were talking off to one side.

Erika took a deep breath and approached. Melinda looked at Erika with frustration written all over her face.

Erika swallowed a lump. The last thing she wanted was to cause Melinda or anyone on the squad’s frustration.

“So, you need a new uniform.” It was stated.

Erika nodded. “I’m sorry. It was in my closet when my house burned.”

Melinda sighed. “I guess it’s the best excuse to need a new one. “I’ll have to check with the office, but we might have to charge you for a replacement.”

Erika hoped that they could get the insurance check soon. Things were starting to add up cost wise. “I understand.”

“Taylor!” Melinda called across the gym. “See if you can find Erika a replacement Rally uniform.” She handed Erika a large key. “Give that to Taylor.”

Erika nodded and as quickly as she could, caught up with the rally squad leader.

“She giving you shit?” Taylor inquired.

“A little.” She handed Taylor the key.

“It’s not like you decided to get a brain tumor and then burn down your house.” Taylor shook her head. “You have the luck of the plague.”

Erika’s heart skipped a beat. She immediately admonished herself. She really needed to stop reacting whenever her old identity was brought up.

“Should I wait out here?” Erika asked as they approached the girl’s locker room.

“Not unless you want to change out here.” Taylor opened the door.

Erika took a deep breath and ducked in after her. Although designed similar to the boys locker room, the girls was fitted out a little differently. The ivory colored tile on the walls was accented by a soft pink tile, where the boys was a blue. The smell was completely different as well. Not nearly as musky as the boys, although it had that locker room smell underneath the new ones that she was smelling.

Taylor took her to a locked closet next to the coaching office. She opened it up and started going through some of the uniforms. “What size are you?” Taylor asked.

Erika told her.

“We don’t have that size. Here is one skirt larger, and one smaller. Try them on and see if one of them will work. Here is the correct sweater size.”

Erika took the proffered clothing and looked around the locker room.

“What’s wrong?” Taylor closed up the closet.

“I um. I am shy.” Erika stated.

“Seriously, girl?” Taylor rolled her eyes. “Just go over behind those lockers then.”

Erika nodded and ducked the wall of lockers that were pointed out. No bathroom door to lock. No place to really change in private. At least everyone else was out in the gym.

Erika stripped out of her blue sweater and pulled the rally one over her head. It fit just like her old one, only this had that not so pleasant locker room scent to it.

She stripped out of her tights and skirt and grabbed the smaller skirt.

“What’s taking….. What the hell?” Taylor was staring at the bulge in Erica’s panties.

Erika jerked the skirt to cover her genitals.

“Oh hell no.” Taylor shook her head. “Hell no. You’re a guy?” Taylor started storming away.

“Wait! Taylor, Wait!” Erika ran after her.

“You’re a dude.” Taylor turned and yelled at Erika “I knew there was something off about you.” She looked Erika up and down. Erika still held the skirt in front of her genitalia. “You’re Erik Martin. You are the F’ing plague. I knew your artwork looked familiar.”

“Taylor, please, let me explain.” Erika pleaded.

“Explain what? That you are a guy? A guy trying to be a girl? Hell, and no. I need to go have a talk with Melinda.”

“Taylor!” Erika screamed.

“What is going on in here?” Samantha burst into the locker room.

Taylor whipped around on Samantha “You are just as guilty. I’ll bet you knew all along.”

Samantha blanched and glanced at Erika who was still half dressed.

“Taylor, take a breath.” Samantha’s voice trembled.

“I knew it.” Taylor growled. “You are part of this too.” She jabbed a finger at Erika over her shoulder. “That she/he is the plague. You knew and you are covering for it? He’s the Tranny you are all protecting?”

Samantha’s face turned beet red. She grabbed Taylor and pushed her up against the wall. “Erika is not a Tranny.” Samantha growled. “She is a wonderful person who has dealt with things that you wouldn’t want to have in your nightmares.”

Taylor pushed back, but Samantha was too angry.

“You have no idea what she has been through and put up with and is still the sweetest most thoughtful person I have ever met.”

“Samantha.” Erika stepped forth. “Samantha, let her go.”

“She needs to calm down and then apologize.” Samantha had tears in her eyes.

“For what?” Taylor growled “for finding out that it has been lying to us all school year?
How many people know?”

“You can’t tell, Taylor.” Samantha barked. “What has she done to you? Hmm?”

“Lied to me and the school.”

“No, she didn’t lie, she just didn’t go around telling everyone. It’s none of their business.”

“What’s going on?” Krystal came in.

“Taylor knows.” Erika wanted to cry. Everything at school had been going so well. How could they convince Taylor to keep it secret too?

“You knew too?” Taylor almost spat. “Let me guess, Tricia of course knew, Victoria? Julian?”

Erika went white at Julian’s name

“Why would they all keep it a secret?” Taylor was losing steam. “What could you possibly have on them to keep them quiet?”

“Nothing.” Krystal told her. “Nothing at all. We all like Erika. She has done nothing to hurt anyone in this school and from what I have heard, she of all people, has every right to hurt everyone in this school.” She looked to Erika then back to Taylor. “She is one of the kindest souls that I’ve ever met. She goes out of her way to make everyone comfortable. Haven’t you noticed how she doesn’t change with the rest of Rally or Cheer? How she always uses the bathrooms to change, how she diverts her eyes or quickly goes off somewhere else when someone might be changing, or heaven forbid, exposing themselves?” Krystal paused. “She doesn’t hold anything over anybody. It’s not in her make up.”

“You can’t tell.” Samantha let go of Taylor. “You just can’t. She has worked too hard, gone through too much. If it gets out, she’ll have to change schools, and I don’t want to lose another sister.”

“She’s a guy.” Taylor insisted.

“You are mixed race.” Krystal shrugged. “You are half black, and half white, yet you identify as black. Why don’t you identify as white?”

“Because I’m black.”

“Are you? Just because Erika was born with different plumbing doesn’t mean she isn’t a girl.”

“Yes, it does.” Taylor insisted.

“Think about it, Taylor.” Krystal looked her in the eye. “What makes you black? Is it how you look how you feel or who you are in your heart?” Krystal smiled at Erika who had already changed back into her cute outfit. “I know in my heart that Erika is as much girl as I am.”

Samantha pointed to Erika. “Take a good look at her, Taylor. Does she look like anything other than a girl? You’ve accepted her as a girl for three and a half months. You’ve even accepted her on the Rally squad.” Samantha lowered her voice, “So why change your mind, just because her plumbing isn’t like ours?

Taylor looked at Erika for a long moment. “Are you really a girl?”

Erika swallowed. “That is something my therapist and I are working on, but yes, I do believe I am.”

“How many cheerleaders does it take to get someone a uniform?” Melinda growled from the locker room door.

All four girls exchanged looks.

Melinda came around the corner and saw the four in a stare down. “What’s going on?” She demanded.

“I’m not feeling well.” Taylor got up. “I’m going home. I think I’m going to puke.” She cast a scowl at Erika and then Samantha. She looked at Melinda, “I’ll see you later.”

“Well?” Melinda looked at the others. “Get back out there? Erika, did you find a replacement uniform?”

“Yes.”

“Well, get it on. You can’t practice in that?” She referred to Erika’s clothing.

“Will she say anything?” Erika looked to Samantha as they sat in the car waiting for Tricia to get out of Dive practice.

Samantha shook her head. “I really don’t know. She was pretty upset.”

Erika just nodded. “I can’t really blame her, though.”

“I’ll call her tonight, after she’s calmed down.” Samantha thought aloud.

“Just leave her be. If she tells, she tells. I’m tired of this emotional roller coaster.”

“You can’t mean that. What if you become the plague again? Or the plaguette? No.” Samantha was adamant. “I’m not going to allow anyone else go through yours or Summer’s pain.”

“You can’t stop it.” Erika stated. “Its happening every day here at school. You couldn’t guess how many of the people here are getting picked on by people like Greg and Tyler.”

“It needs to stop.”

“I agree, but you can’t be everywhere all the time. Look at poor Stephanie.” Erika pointed out. “Remember she said that since the plague has been gone, she has been targeted? The fountain wasn’t the first time. It’s just the only time that we saw it.”

The car door opened. “Ugh, I’m beat. How was Rally?” Tricia dropped into the back seat and closed the door.

“Taylor found out about Erika’s secret.” Samantha stated. “She seems pretty upset and we don’t know if she’ll keep it or not.”

“How did she find out?” Tricia sighed.

“My gaffe went up in flames with the house.” Erika explained. “She walked in on me while I was changing.”

“You didn’t lock the door?”

“It was in the locker room. It would have been even more awkward had I insisted on changing in the bathroom.

“Sorry to say it, but it really isn’t much of a secret, anymore is it?” Tricia sighed. “How many people know now, and how many of those won’t accidentally slip up?”

“Are you saying we should just tell everyone?” Samantha asked backing out of the parking space. “Call a school assembly and announce that Erika is or was Eric ‘the plague’?”

“I think that’s a bit extreme.” Tricia put her seat belt on. “Maybe we should start a rumor. That way we control what is said.”

Erika shook her head. “I hate rumors, they tend to change and get more exaggerated as they spread.”

“I agree with her.” Samantha pulled out of the school parking lot.

“I’m going to the hotel remember?”

“Yes, but thanks for reminding me.”

“You know.” Erika smiled. “The hotel has an indoor pool. I don’t have a bathing suit yet, but it is open for us to use.”

“I’m done with pools.” Tricia groaned. “Does it have a hot tub?”

Erika nodded.

“I have a swimsuit you can borrow.” Samantha offered.

“Not a two piece.” Erika was adamant. “Especially since I don’t have my gaffe.”

“When are you getting a new one?” Tricia asked.

“As soon as I get a new credit card and time on a computer.”

“Use mine.” Tricia offered.

“Your what?”

“My computer and credit card. You can pay me back later. Obviously it is something that you need to be wearing.”

Samantha pulled up to Tricia’s house.

“Come on. It shouldn’t take too long.”

The girls filed up to Tricia’s room.

“Use this.” Tricia tossed some fabric at Erika as she finished ordering her gaffe and glue.

Erika pulled it off of her head and held it out to see that it was a black one piece swim suit with red accents. “Where did you get this?” She asked.

“It’s Leeza’s. She won’t mind.” Tricia shrugged. “Too bad it isn’t pink.”

“Hot tubbing is on.” Samantha grinned. “I just need to grab mine.”

Erika’s phone rang scaring all three girls.

“What is that?” Tricia looked at Erika.

“My loaner phone. I haven’t bothered to change the ring tones. I’m supposed to be getting a new one soon.” Erika accepted the call and spoke for a few moments. Before hanging up. “Have to take a rain check on tonight.” Erika stated. “Family has plans. Samantha, can you please take me to the hotel?”

Erika used her key card and entered the hotel room. Her father was sitting at the small table with his laptop and talking on his phone. Her mother came out of the bathroom and put her finger to her lips signaling Erika to keep quiet.

Erika put her few things down on her bed, and kicked off her shoes.

“Don’t just kick those off.” Her mother whispered. “Put them away. This room is too small for us to throw our stuff everywhere.”

Erika put the shoes in the closet. She turned around to see her father, still on the phone beckon her over. As she approached, he picked up a box and handed it to her.

“Oh, Thank you, Daddy.” She tried not to squeal. It was her replacement phone. She flopped back down on the bed and started personalizing her phone, adding apps and making sure that her contacts backed up on the cloud were all there.

“Erika.” Her mother hissed. “Put your legs together, you’re in a skirt. I don’t care if we are not in public. Good habits need to be kept at all times.”

“Sorry.” She adjusted herself on her bed and crossed her ankles. The first thing she did was text her friends to inform them that she had her phone.

“Okay, that is taken care of.” Her father set his phone down. “Shall we get some dinner?”

“Thank you for the new phone, Daddy.” She began getting up but was still on her phone.

“What did they say?” her mother asked her father.

“Apparently, there was some faulty wiring in the kitchen. The wires heated up and caused the fire. So, they have ruled out arson which means we will be getting our insurance money.”

“Oh thank goodness.” Her mother sighed.

The three walked across the street to a restaurant and were seated.

“Now the question is whether we rebuild, or sell the lot and move somewhere else?”

“Stay.” She and her mother said at the same time.

“We were thinking of remodeling. This will give us a clean slate to build the house we want.”

“I’ll check with the bank next week.” Her father nodded. He looked to Erika. “You ready for your shoot tomorrow?”

Erika nodded. “I think so. It’s kind of my first. I’m not sure what I need to do.”

“They want you there kind of early tomorrow. I guess hair and makeup take a while.”

“What am I advertising for?” Erika asked.

“Car insurance.” Her father smiled. “If this works out they may ask you to do a commercial.”

“Seriously?”

Her father nodded.

“Will she be getting paid?” her mother asked.

Her father smiled and nodded.

“How much?” Erika nearly bounced in her seat.

“A lot.” Her father said. “I’m going to have half of it put into your college fund.”

“How much?” Erika couldn’t stand the anticipation.

“Three thousand for tomorrows shoot.”

“That is a lot of money.” Her mother was surprised.

“So I’ll get fifteen hundred?”

“Yes. But you might want to make it stretch. We don’t know if you’ll get other jobs.”

“I’ll need new clothes.” Erika. “and a new laptop.”

“I ordered your laptop today.” Her father smiled. “It’ll be here tomorrow.”

“Which kind?” Erika was skeptical.

“I’ll show you the stats when we get back.”

Erika groaned when she heard the alarm go off. Her brain told her it was Saturday and that she should be sleeping in, but she had her first photoshoot to do. She was excited, but wished that it wasn’t so early.

“Quick shower.” Her mother reminded.

She had taken a long shower the night before to remove all of her body hair. This morning’s shower was to remove the night sweat and wake her a little.

When she came out of the bathroom her father had a latte and scone waiting for her.

“Where are we going?” Erika noticed they weren’t going to Bobbie’s studio.

“I was told to have you at a different studio.” Her father stated as he pulled into a warehouse district. “It should be just up here. Look, there are lots of people at that building, I’ll bet that is where it is.”

Erika finished her latte and tossed it into a nearby dumpster. Then followed her dad through a non-descript door.

The area was huge. Large lights flooded a green screen with light

“Mr. Martin?” a man approached.

“Yes?”

“I’m Trent. Ms. Caine’s assistant.” He glanced at Erika. “You must be Erika.” He took her hand in greeting. Then started leading them further into the building “We are thrilled to have you as one of our models. It’s always great to see our models come early.” He looked more closely at Erika. “No makeup, or hair done, fantastic. Let’s get you over to our stylists and have them get started. Have you eaten? We have a spread set up over there.” He pointed. “Fruit, muffins, dough-nuts, Coffee, bottled water. Help yourself.”

“Thank you.” Erika couldn’t believe how fast this guy spoke.

“Do you have dietary restrictions? Glutton intolerant? dairy issues?”

Erika shook her head

“This is Claire. She’ll be doing your makeup today, and Bree will be doing your hair.” He introduced her to the two women. “Mr. Martin.” Trent went on. “We have a chair over here for you.” He led her father away.

“Hi, Erika.” Claire greeted. “Wow, you have beautiful skin, and look at those beautiful eye lashes. I am so jealous.”

“Thanks.” Erika took a seat in front of the makeup/hair mirror.

“Permed?” Bree asked running her hand through Erika’s hair. “We don’t see that much on girls your age.”

“My stylist Sasha suggested it.”

“Sasha?” Bree looked puzzled. “Sasha from that little town out in the woods?”

Erika gave a slight nod.

“I love Sasha.” Bree broke out into a great big smile. “He and I used to work together way back. “Is he still with his boyfriend?”

“Last I saw him, he was.”

“Okay we are going to start with your hair curly.” Bree stated. “half way through, we’ll run a straight iron through it to change up the look. The company wants you to look like a teenage daughter, so nothing too elaborate.”

“We will also be keeping the makeup very neutral.” Claire added. “It’ll feel and look like a lot, but on camera it’ll just look natural and fresh.”

“Hi Erika.” Bobbie greeted.

“Bobbie!” Erika was happy to see a familiar face. “Are you doing the shoot?”

“Oh, no.” She shook her head causing her dreads to sway. “I’ll be playing the assistant today. Joe is the photographer today. He’s really good. I think you’ll like him.” She turned to Claire. “Erika looks stunning in true, jewel tones. Ruby red, Sapphire blue.”

Claire nodded. “I can see that. Especially with those eyes.”

Erika blushed.

In the reflection of the mirror, Erika could see a woman speaking with her dad. “Is that Ms. Caine?”

Bobbie looked up. “Yes.”

Ms. Caine saw the two looking at her through the mirror. She gave them a tight smile and approached. Her graying blonde hair was pulled up in a tight French twist. She wore a gray business suit with a pink button down blouse and gray two inch, sturdy heals that said all business.

“Hello Erika.” She greeted. “I’m Terri, the insurance company’s representative. How are you doing?”

“Fine, thank you.”

“We are excited to have you do this campaign for us. I hear from Bobbie and your dad that this is your first modeling job?”

Erika nodded.

“Is it as exciting as it sounds?”

“I’m not sure yet. I haven’t done anything.”

“Honest. I like that.” She smiled. “Did Trent see to you?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” She nodded. “If you need anything, just flag him down.”

“Thank you.”

An hour later, Erika was astonished looking in the mirror. It was definitely still her, but a way better version. A dressing screen had been set up in one corner of the building. Three rolling wardrobe racks stood beside it. Ms. Caine and Joe were talking and pointing out different clothes.

“Alright, Erika.” Bobbie took her hand. “Off to wardrobe. Ms. Caine already has some outfits for you.

“We’ve got several looks for you to work with.” Ms. Caine stated. “Once we get the pics back to the office, we’ll figure out which one we’ll use. Shall we start with this?”

Erika took the proffered outfit and quickly changed into a red sweater and black straight skirt.

“Hello, Ms. Martin.” A man greeted with a camera. Erika could only assume that it was Joe. Especially with Bobbie hovering around him. “Let’s start simple, shall we?”

The next two hours were nothing more than a blur mostly of white flashes, wardrobe changes, makeup and hair changes. It was a whole lot less glamorous than she expected and a whole lot more work.

“Okay, everyone, let’s call it a wrap.” Ms. Caine finally called.

Erika’s stomach took that opportunity to growl.

“I hear this is your first time?” Joe asked as he walked with her to the table of food.

“Yes. I’m sure it showed.”

“Only a little. There is something different about you.” He stated. “I can’t put my finger on it. You are a bit shy, but that is understandable, you aren’t one of those girls making duck lips at every opportunity. It’s like you were a tomboy and are just now blossoming.”

If you only knew. Erika thought.

“Most young girls spend a lot of time looking in the mirror practicing poses. This is why I think you are a tomboy. I don’t see you making those ridiculous poses that they post all over face book or twitter. You seem more…… more genuine. I hope you stay this way.”

“Thank you.” Erika didn’t know what to say. She however couldn’t help by see Bobbie, standing behind Joe, beaming as if she had won the lottery.

Bobbie wrapped her up in a great bear hug. “You were wonderful.” She whispered in to Erika’s ear. “You wouldn’t believe the nice things Joe was saying. He usually is like a grouchy bear, but to you, he was more like a teddy bear.”

“Really?” Erika was stunned.

“Yes.” Bobbie pulled back and smiled at her. “And to think that I found you while going through family portraits. You are going somewhere Erika.”

Erika’s stomach grumbled again. “Hopefully to grab a bite before they clear it all.” She watched as staff started clearing the table of food.

She grabbed a banana and a small sandwich triangle.

“Good job, Erika.” Ms. Caine approached. “Joe is not an easy photographer and not only did you put up with him, he seems smitten with you.”

“He seemed pretty easy going to me.” Erika shrugged.

Ms. Caine eyed her looking for hints of sarcasm. When she didn’t, she smiled. “Your father mentioned that your house burned down the other day.”

Erika grimaced. “Yes. We lost everything.”

Ms. Caine looked around as if to make sure that someone else in charge wasn’t eaves dropping. She smiled at Erika. “Take a couple of outfits off the rack.”

“Seriously?” She covered her mouth so not to show the mouthful of food. She did see a couple of items that she had planned on searching on line for.

“Consider it a bonus. If these pictures work out as well as everyone seems to think, it’ll be well worth it.”

“Thank you, Ms. Caine.”

“It was a pleasure meeting you, Ms. Caine.” Her father came up to them.

“You too, Mr. Martin. I have another appointment to make. Don’t forget to grab a few things.” She said to Erika as she left.

Erika’s father looked at her with eyes full of pride. “You looked amazing.”

“Thanks Daddy.”

“What few things do you need to grab?”

“Ms. Caine said that I could take a few outfits as a bonus, especially since we lost the house.”

“Well that was very nice of her.”

Erika nodded as she made a bee line to one outfit in particular.

Erika was on cloud nine by the time they had returned to their hotel room. She hung her new clothes in the closet with the few that she had gotten.

“You’d have been proud.” Her dad was telling her mother. “The way that she handled herself in front of the camera. Here.” He pulled out his phone. “You have to take a look at these. I wasn’t supposed to take them, but I couldn’t help myself.” He began showing her mother.

“Crap, not again.” Erika cursed.

“What is it, Erika?” her mother asked.

“My vision is starting to go. I’m going to have an event.” Erika lay down on the bed as the gray around the outside of her vision began closing off the world to her. Her mother and father’s voice became more distant as if hearing them from down a very long corridor.

“I’ll call 911.” Her father’s voice was fading

She felt her mother cradle her head. “I’ve got you, sweetie. I’ve got you, it’ll be over soon.”

Erika’s world disappeared.

Eric’s strong muscles ached. Ached in the good way after a long hard work out. He flexed his tired, but rock hard biceps and turned to the front door of the duplex he and Samantha were renting as the door opened.

Summer nodded her head. Eric’s heart burst with pride and a fading sorrow. His daughter had inherited her name sake’s love of art.

“Come on back, Erika.” Her mother’s voice cut through her darkness. “I’ve got you. You are safe. I’ve got you.”

“Momma?” Erika croaked. “Why is this happening?”

“I don’t know, sweetie. I don’t know. It’s good to see you back though.” Erika cracked her eyes to see her smile down at her.

“Ambulance will be here in a few moments.” Her father put his phone down and squeezed her shoulder. “How are you doing, sweetie?”

“My head is pounding. I’m going to be sick.!” She lurched from her mother’s lap.

Her dad grabbed a trash can and brought it up just in time to catch the contents of her stomach.

-------

“Can’t you give me something that will get rid of them?” Erika asked the Doctor.

He shook his head. “There are some medications that can reduce how often they happen, but there is still too much we don’t know about the brain that we can’t cure them… Totally.”

“Did the surgeons damage my brain when removing the tumor?” Erika asked.

“We can’t be sure.” The Doctor stated. “It could be that the tumor was putting pressure on a part of the brain and now that it is gone, the brain is reacting in a negative way.”

Erika sighed.

“I’m going to have you see a neurologist that specializes in seizures.” The Doctor stated. “Until you see him, I’m going to have you start taking something. It might help, but again it might not.”

“Let me guess, it’s a brain thing.” Erika was exasperated.

-------

“How are you feeling this morning, hon?” Erika’s mother came out of the hotel bathroom.

“Head ache is gone.” Erika sighed as she rolled over.

“Well that is good.”

“Momma?” Erika asked.

“Yes, Dear?”

“What changed?” She had been pondering it for a few days, did she really want to know?

“What’s that?” Her mother sat on the edge of the bed and stroked a hand through Erika’s hair.

“What caused you to change how you feel about me?” Erika bit her lip. Was she ruining it? “My wanting to be a girl.” She clarified.

Her mother took a deep breath. “It was a number of things.” She sighed. “Mostly it was the fire. When we couldn’t get to you and you weren’t responding to our calls. I was …. I was afraid you’d die in there.” Tears welled up in her mother’s eyes. “I …. I … I’m embarrassed and well…. A bit ashamed. I …. I thought we’d lose you. I promised God that if you came out unharmed that I would do my best to accept you as Erika, my daughter.”

Erika had so many feelings swirling around in her, she didn’t know what to feel. But she could see that her mother needed validation.

“Thank you.” She laid a hand on her mother’s.

The two just looked at one another for a moment.

“Time to get a move on it, young lady.” We have to go.”

“Go where?”

“We need to find an apartment. You think we can live in a hotel forever?”

“Apartment?”

“Just until we figure out what we are going to do. I don’t really want to spend Christmas in a hotel, especially when my mother is coming. Hop to it.”

Erika was ready before the hour was up. She emerged from the bathroom and pulled on her leather boots, grabbed her purse and phone and looked to her mother. “Ready.”

They stopped by the coffee stand before heading out to look at apartments.

The first one they looked at was close to her school, but it was older and had a communal laundry facility. Erika, like her mother, didn’t want others handling her clothes.

The second one they looked at was a bit further away from their neighborhood. It was in a newer part of town in one of the trendy buildings that had businesses on the first floor and large lofts and condos above them. Restaurants, coffee stands, and service businesses would be a quick walk away, but the parking was horrible and the layouts were not comfortable.

They looked at three more places before calling a halt for lunch.

“Grandma is still coming for Christmas?” Erika asked around a fish taco.

“As long as we have a place for her, which means we need a place for ourselves.”

“And how does she feel about my decision?”

“She is not thrilled about it, but as she told me, it could be worse, you could be a heroin addict, or on crack.”

“See, I have that going for me.” Erika smiled. “Seriously? How is she dealing with it?”

“Like the rest of us.” Her mother stated. “Not much we can do about it. If this is who you are, then this is who you are.” She smiled across at Erika. “The old you, Eric, wouldn’t spend time with his mother, go apartment hunting. He’d lock himself away in his room with his computer, so I like this part of it.”

“Sorry, I was so gloomy.” Erika dabbed her mouth with her napkin. “I had a lot going on. Samantha said it was ‘survival mode’. I was so busy trying to survive what was going on, wallowing in depression that I was closeting myself away, trying to disappear. She said that her sister kinda did the same.”

“Well, now we have moved on.” Her mother took a deep breath. “Now I have a beautiful daughter, who is of all things a model.”

Erika giggled. “I know, right? Who would have thought that even a few months ago?”

“I haven’t told your grandmother yet.” Her mother confided.

“Why?”

“I’m kind of hoping that they will get the campaign signs up so that she can be surprised.

“I’m kind of nervous about Grandma meeting me.” Erika took a sip of her tea.

“You are her granddaughter. She has to love you. It’s in the laws of being a grandparent.”

“I hope so.” Erika put her napkin on her plate. “I’m stuffed. Where to next?”

By the end of the day, they found a condo for rent that was already furnished. It was right at the top of their budget, but it being furnished meant that they wouldn’t have to purchase much to move in.

They went back with her father who agreed that it would be ideal until they figured out what they wanted to do with their house. Erika was excited because it had a hot tub, and she had an on-suite bathroom similar to the arrangement in their burned-up house.

A third room was used as an office that converted into a guest room which would be perfect for grandma. The lease was signed and they would have one last night in the hotel.

Once back to their hotel room, Erika found a secluded spot and phoned up Samantha and Tricia to give them the 411 on the situation.

“I have kind of good news, kind of bad news.” Samantha told Erika and Tricia. “I spoke to Taylor. She is still kind of upset.”

“Still?” Tricia protested.

“Anyway. She has promised not to say anything to anyone, with one exception.”

“What exception?” Erika closed her eyes waiting for bad news.

“She said that she feels duty bound to talk to Melinda about it. Melinda is the Cheer and Rally captain.”

“So, she’ll have Melinda kick me off of Rally.” Erika groaned. “Are you sure she isn’t going to blab to everyone?”

“I made her promise.” Samantha affirmed. “As of tomorrow, it will be in Melinda’s court as of what to do.”

“What do you think she will do?” Erika’s chest felt heavy.

“I honestly don’t know.” Samantha sighed. “She could freak out, inform the whole school, she could kick you off Rally, she could do nothing.”

“I don’t like it.” Tricia growled. “Too many people know already, and this tiny back woods town isn’t as open as other places. Given what they did to Eric, I don’t like anyone else knowing about Erika. It could get nasty.”

“There isn’t much I can do about it now, is there?” Erika felt resigned.

“We’ll figure something out.” Tricia tried to encourage her friend.

“I’ll try to see if I can be part of the meeting with Melinda.” Samantha told them. “At least give Melinda another side of the story.”

------

Erika slipped into the hotel room. Her mother was already in her nightgown in bed watching a show. Her father was on the laptop working away at something.

“There you are.” He smiled. “I have something to tell the both of you.”

“Yes?” her mother muted the T.V.

“My coworker is throwing a Christmas party and wants us to go.”

“When?” Erika asked.

“In a few days.” Her father smiled. “He is known to throw a pretty great party and it would be very advantageous for me to attend with my loving family.”

“What kind of party?” her mother asked.

“I don’t know. I’ll email him asking for details.”

“Should we go with everything else going on?” her mother asked.

“It would be a great business opportunity.” Her father pushed.

“It’s kind of short notice. But fine.” Her other un-muted her show.

“Will there be people my age, or just adults?” Erika asked.

“I guess I’ll have to find out.” He shrugged. “I assume there will be people your age. He did say it was for the families.”

Once released, Jorge again looked Erika up and down. “Can’t believe you were Eric Martin.” He shook his head in disbelief. “Did you get breast implants?”

Samantha and Tricia laughed.

“They are falsies.” Erika smirked. “They are glued on until I can grow my own.”

“Wow, they sure look real.”

“Stop staring at her breasts and start staring at mine.” Krystal slapped his arm.

“Yours are much prettier and real.” Jorge assured her.

Samantha picked her up at the hotel before heading to Tricia’s.

“So…” Samantha prompted. “You didn’t tell us about the photoshoot. How did it go?”

“It went good.” Erika shrugged. “I met some interesting people. You should see what they did with my makeup and hair.”

“Oh?”

Erika nodded. “I guess you’ll see when the advertisements are put out.” She teased. “Oh, and I got to keep a few of the outfits. I’m wearing one today.” She beamed.

“I can’t see it through your coat.” Samantha pouted.

“Wait until we get to school. It’s not mind blowing or anything. Just a cute outfit.”

“Well, I can’t wait.” Samantha threw Erika a smile. “By the way, I spoke to Melinda last night.”

“You did?”

“Yes. She said that Taylor wanted to have a meeting with her alone, but I told her that I had information that needed to be considered as well. We will meet after school at the beginning of Cheer practice.”

“Should I be there?” Erika asked.

“In the meeting, no.” Samantha thought. “But be available in case we need you.”

Erika nodded.

Tricia greeted Erika with a long lingering kiss. “Between Dive practice, Rally practice, homework and Christmas, I barely get to see you.” She complained. “We need to have a sleep over.”

“It’ll have to wait until after Christmas.” Erika frowned. “My grandmother is coming into town, and I have a ton of stuff to do with moving into the condo.”

“After Christmas.” Tricia sighed.

“We have to deal with one thing at a time.” Erika stated. “First things first is Taylor, Melinda and Rally.”

The threesome entered the school. Leaving the bone chilling cold outside was a great relief as the School’s furnace pumped out plenty of warm air.

“How did the photoshoot go?” Krystal asked.

“It was very cool.” Erika grinned. “I was able to keep this as a bonus.” She opened her coat to reveal the cute outfit.

“I need a job like that.” Samantha looked Erika up and down with appreciation and a bit of wistfulness.

“Hey hold on.” Erika ran a few steps down the hall. “Hold up Stephanie.” She called.

Stephanie looked around as if stunned that someone might call her name. “Erika?”

“Turn around.” Erika ordered.

Confused, Stephanie did as instructed.

Erika pulled a note taped to her back off. “Sorry, Stephanie, I didn’t see who did it.”

Stephanie’s lips trembled.

“Hey, Where’s your first class?” Erika smiled.

“Chem.” Stephanie wadded up the mean note and tossed it in a nearby trash can.

Erika looked back to her friends and waved them over. “We’re going to walk you to your class.” Erika told Stephanie as well as her friends.

“Seriously, you don’t have to do that.” Stephanie started to walk away.

“I told you we would have your back.” Erika fell instep beside her. She changed the subject. “How was your weekend?”

“Uneventful. Played with my cats. Read some.” The strange girl shrugged.

“Sounds relaxing.” Tricia made an effort.

“What are you reading.” Krystal inquired.

“Just a stupid sci-fi series.” Stephanie shrugged.

“Which one.” Krystal asked

“Dune.”

“One of the best Sci-fi books ever.” Krystal’s face lit up. “Don’t you just Love Channi?”

Stephanie looked at Krystal with an unbelieving look.

“She is the biggest bookworm I have met.” Samantha affirmed that Krystal wasn’t just joking with Stephanie.

“Yes. I like her a lot.”

“We should start a book club.” Krystal offered.

“Uh, sure.” Stephanie wasn’t quite believing what she was hearing.

“There you are, beautiful.” Jorge caught up with the group. H wrapped Krystal up in his arms and gave her a huge kiss.

Krystal pulled away. “Stephanie and I are going to start a book club.” She smiled at Jorge.

Jorge rolled his eyes.

“He doesn’t understand books.” Krystal shook her head at Stephanie.

“Why read them when you can just wait a year or two and watch the movie.” Jorge shrugged.

Stephanie and Krystal both rolled their eyes.

Stephanie stopped in front of her class. She looked at all of Erika’s group. “Thanks for this.” She stated.

“It’s like Erika said,” Samantha smiled. “We’ve got your back.”

“What was that all about?” Jorge asked as they walked away.

Samantha explained about Stephanie getting bullied and that She and Erika had planned to put a stop to the bullying at school.

“There she is.” Samantha leaned closer to Erika. “Just be nice.”

Erika spotted coming down the hall. “I plan to.” she protested.

“Good morning, Taylor.” Samantha greeted.

“Samantha, Eri-ka.” Taylor stressed the last syllable of Erika’s name. She looked to Samantha. “Melinda told me that you wanted to be in the meeting too.”

“I think it’s only fair, that she hears both sides of the issue.” Samantha stated.

Taylor looked at Erika. “Look, it has nothing personal to do with you. I just don’t think it’s right that the others don’t know and well, I’m kind of creeped out.”

Erika closed her eyes for a moment. When she opened them she smiled at Taylor. “I totally understand where you are coming from. I just would rather that the whole school didn’t know about it.”

Taylor nodded. “I won’t say anything to anyone but Melinda …. for now,”

“Thank you.” Samantha and Erika said together.

The group moved on down the hall.

“What am I missing.” Jorge asked. “What does Taylor know that you all don’t want found out?”

Erika blanched. She had totally forgotten that Jorge was with her small posse.

Krystal looked to Erika.

“You haven’t told him?” Samantha asked. “I just assumed that he knew.”

“Knew what?” Jorge looked from one face to another.

“He’ll find out soon enough,” Erika shrugged. “We may as well tell him.”

“I’d kind of like to know what is going on.” Jorge agreed.

“It wasn’t as if I was keeping anything from you.” Krystal asserted.

“Let’s go in here.” Tricia ushered them into the library. They moved to an empty aisle in the back.

“Go ahead.” Erika told Krystal as she studied Jorge’s face.

“How do you say it?” Krystal looked to Erika.

Jorge looked from Krystal to Erika and then back to Krystal.

“Erika is …… someone special.” Krystal blew out the rest of her breath.

Erika watched as Jorge just nodded. “Yes?”

“Seriously?” She flicked a look to Erika again. “I feel like I’m betraying you.”

Erika nodded a smile.

Krystal took a deep breath and closed her eyes. “Erika is actually a guy.”

Jorge just stared blankly at his girlfriend.

Krystal opened her eyes and saw that he hadn’t understood. “Erika was born a boy. She transitioned to a girl this summer.”

Jorge’s brow creased. He turned to Erika. “I thought there was something off about you.” He looked her up and down. “You’re a boy?”

Erika nodded. “I was Eric Martin last year.”

Jorge’s jaw dropped. “No.” he shook his head. “You? You were the Plague?”

Erika sighed. “Was as in past tense.” God, she hated that name.

“Holy shit!” He kept looking her up and down. He shook his head. “I…. really?”

Erika smiled even though her heart was pounding in her chest.

He looked to Krystal. Erika followed his gaze. Krystal was in tears.

“I’m sorry.” Krystal wiped tears away while looking at Erika. She looked to Jorge. “I’m sorry. It really isn’t my secret to tell.”

“Wow, that is a big one.” He wrapped her in a hug. “It’s okay, it’s okay.” He soothed. He released Krystal but held her hand and faced.

“Look, I don’t care how you want to dress, or be addressed. You are one of Krystal’s closest friends who has helped her in ways you can never understand. Eric or Erika, we are good.”

“Really?” Erika asked.

Jorge nodded. Then found himself wrapped up in a hug.

Once released, Jorge again looked Erika up and down. “Can’t believe you were Eric Martin.” He shook his head in disbelief. “Did you get breast implants?”

Samantha and Tricia laughed.

“They are falsies.” Erika smirked. “They are glued on until I can grow my own.”

“Wow, they sure look real.”

“Stop staring at her breasts and start staring at mine.” Krystal slapped his arm.

“Yours are much prettier and real.” Jorge assured her. “So, this is the big thing going on in Cheer and Rally?”

“Yes.” Samantha answered. “Taylor found out Friday and is going to Melinda today about it.”

“Does it make a difference?” Jorge asked. “I’m a guy on the cheer squad.”

“I think it’s more about Erika’s birth gender being kept a secret.” Krystal explained.

“It’s not like she is a pervert.” He looked at Erika and winked. “Are you?”

It was Erika’s turn to slap his arm, and was almost beat by three other sets of hands doing the same thing.

Jorge laughed at the abuse.

-------------

Samantha and Taylor stood in the back part of the locker room eyeing each other while waiting for Melinda.

The dark-haired beauty showed up soon enough. “Okay, what is going on between you two and why is it messing up my squads?” she demanded.

Samantha looked to Taylor to start. She wanted to see how far Taylor was willing to go.

“Well?” Melinda commanded.

“It’s Erika Summers.” Taylor began. “She’s been hiding things about her that I feel that the squad should know.”

“I don’t think it is any of their business.” Samantha butt in.

“Does this have anything to do with her being on squad?” Melinda looked between the two.

“Yes.” Taylor stated at the same time as Samantha said “No.”

Taylor glared at Samantha, “It does too.”

Melinda put up a hand to keep Samantha from speaking. “Taylor is my second and in charge of Rally. If she thinks this is an issue, I should hear it.”

Samantha ground her teeth.

“So out with it, Taylor. We are wasting practice time.”

“Erika is a Tranny.” Taylor spit out.

“She’s a what?” Melinda couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“That’s a derogatory name.” Samantha objected. “You just don’t like her.”

“I did until I found out she’s been lying to us.” Taylor rounded on Samantha.

“Hold on!” Melinda felt like she needed to physically step between the two. “Erika is a Transgender?”

Both girls just looked at one another. Samantha nodded. “Erika is Transgendered, yes.”

“So, she was born a boy, but is living as a girl.” Melinda wanted to clarify.

“Yes.” Samantha stated. “You’ve seen how sweet she has been even though she’s been through hell.”

Melinda looked to Taylor. “Do we not have lesbians on the squad?”

“Yes.” Taylor looked down, then back up, “But this is different.”

“Because she is sporting a dick?” Melinda looked to Samantha. “Sorry.”

Samantha just shook her head.

“Has Erika made unwanted advances towards you?” Melinda asked. “Has she stared at you in the locker room? Wait, I don’t think I have ever seen her in the locker room until Friday.”

“She changes in the bathroom or closet.” Samantha charged to get that in.

“But She used to be…”

“Shut it, Taylor.” Melinda glared at her. “I don’t care who she used to be. I wouldn’t care if she used to be ‘the plague’ himself.”

Samantha suppressed a chuckle.

“She has shown hard work, caring and dedication. Sure, she has had medical issues, but a brain tumor is, in my opinion, an acceptable excuse to miss practice. She has more than made up for that by making all of our posters and signs and doing a damn good job.”

“But she has lied to us?” Taylor was reaching.

“And you haven’t lied to the squad before?” Melinda held Taylor’s gaze.

Samantha saw that Taylor looked away first. She now wanted to know what Taylor had lied about.

“If you have an issue over Erika’s gender, then you can leave the squad.”

Taylor looked like a deer in headlights.

“Is that all?” Melinda looked between the two.

Taylor turned and stormed out of the locker room.

Samantha watched her leave then looked to Melinda. “Thank you.”

“Don’t Thank me yet.” Melinda growled. “I don’t like being lied to either, and you have been just as guilty. Being Transgender is not a reason to be kicked off the squad. I wouldn’t be able to kick off a Muslim for their religion, or a gay person for their sexual preference.”

Samantha stayed quiet. This was going better than she had planned, she didn’t want to jinx it now.

“Who else on squad knows about Erika?”

“Taylor, me, Krystal and Jorge found out today.”

“Can you send Erika in?” Melinda dismissed her.

Samantha exited the locker room. The girls on Rally were confused and gossiping. Apparently, Taylor had stormed out of the building.

“Erika.” Samantha looked to her friend. “Melinda wants to talk to you.”

Erika looked to Samantha in askance. Samantha smiled in response.

Taking a deep breath, Erika pushed into the locker room.

“So.” Melinda greeted. “You have been exposed. Taylor is a great person. I hope she doesn’t quit.”

“Neither do I.” Erika agreed. “I like Taylor a lot.”

“So this isn’t personal?”

“Not on my part.” Erika stated. “I don’t even blame her for being upset. I just don’t want the Squad knowing let alone the whole school.”

Melinda nodded. “That would be uncomfortable, wouldn’t it? Look, just like I told Samantha. Being Transgender isn’t a reason for kicking you off the squad.”

Erika sighed heavily despite Samantha’s reassurance.

“However, I’d like you to continue changing separately, and if anyone complains of pervy stuff, I will kick you off the squad.”

“I’m not a pervert.” Erika protested. “You can check with Krystal, Victoria and Tricia.”

“Victoria knows too?”

Erika nodded.

“How many know?” Melinda was bewildered.”

“Too many.” Erika shrugged.

“So, you like girls and you want to be a girl?” Melinda questioned.

Erika smiled. “Yeah, that sums it up.”

Melinda shook her head. “Just trying to wrap my head around it.”

“So am I.” Erika agreed.

“Okay. I won’t say anything until you give me reason enough to.”

“Thank you.” Erika gushed.

“Wait, does the principal know?”

“Yes.”

Melinda led Erika back out into the gym. “Okay girls, we have a lot to work on. Let’s go! Jordon, you’re in charge of Rally until further notice.”

Jordon looked stunned but nodded.

--------------

“I heard that you had another event.” Dr. Barts closed the door behind them and ushered Erika to her usual place.

“Yes.” Erika sighed.

“What happened?”

Erika told her about the seizure.

Dr. Barts asked questions about events leading up to the seizure. How she felt about those events, when the symptoms started. The same questions that she answered at the Emergency room.

“Doc.” Erika broke off the twenty questions. “I had another vison or hallucination or whatever again.

“During your seizure?”

Erika nodded and shared everything about the strange vision.

“I wasn’t even upset.” She stated. “I was even happy.”

“And you were seeing everything through your own eyes?” Dr. Barts asked.

“Yes.”

“Hmm.” She wrote vigorously.

“On one hand, I’m scared of how I feel and what I experience, but on the other, I feel curious and a longing.”

“Hmm. Have you told anyone else about these visions? Your friends, your parents?”

“No, just you.”

Dr. Barts gave her a tight-lipped smile but kept scratching down notes.

“Why haven’t you shared with your friends?”

“They’ll think I’m crazy.” Erika shrugged. “They are kind of personal.”

“The visions or the feelings with the visions?”

“Both?” Erika looked out at the bare tree branches.

“Do you keep a journal or diary?” Dr. Barts asked.

Erika shook her head.

“Maybe you should start.” She advised. “Start simple with what happened to you during the day and document your dreams and these visions. Not just what happened, but how you felt at different parts of them.”

“I wouldn’t want my mom to read it.”

“You have a laptop or a tablet, right? You could put a password lock on it.”

“Not yet. The fire destroyed everything.”

“Oh, yes. Your mother mentioned that your house burned down. You want to talk about that?”

Erika continued staring out the window. Her imagination was using the branches and the voids to create pictures; animals, faces, state and country outlines. “There isn’t much to say. I’m sure mom told you the important parts.”

“What are the important parts to you?”

“It was scary.” Erika stated. “I woke up to a firefighter breaking in through my window.”

“You didn’t know about the fire until then?”

“I was dreaming that I was doing a photoshoot and someone was using fire as a back drop.”

“Vivid imagination.”

“Mom has been accepting of me since the fire.” Erika smiled. “That is a break through.”

“Yes, it is. You should give your mom credit for a step forward.”

“I have. We talked about it the other day.”

“How does it make you feel?”

“Great of course.” Erika’s voice lifted. “It has relieved a lot of the stress and fighting around the hotel and now condo.”

“Where are you right now?” Dr. Barts asked.

“In your office talking to you.”

“I mean where is your mind?”

Erika was silent. “It’s stupid. She sat up and looked at her Doctor.

“It’s never stupid.”

“I …. “ Erika looked away then at the rug. “I was making pictures with the tree branches.”

Dr. Barts smiled. “I do too sometimes.” She admitted. “Especially with a particularly boring patient.”

“Dr. Barts!” Erika exclaimed with mock surprise.

“How has school been?”

“Interesting.” Erika again shrugged.

Dr. Barts raised an eyebrow.

Erika told her all that had happened with Taylor, Melinda and Jorge.

“Wow, that must have been stressful.”

Erika nodded.

“It sounds like you handled it well. Did you have an event after such a tough day?”

“Nope.”

“Hmmm.”

Erika went through her closet for the third time. “Mom, I really don’t have anything to wear.”

Her mother knocked on her door and entered. “Let’s see.” She began shuffling through Erika’s new wardrobe looking for something for the Christmas party. “I think you are right. Okay. Shopping again.”

“Can I go with Samantha?”

“I’m tired of shopping.” She paused. “Did I really just admit that? Oh well. Yes. You can go with Samantha.”

“Thank you, Momma.”

“Did your dad give you your replacement card yet?”

“Yes. I told you that last night.”

“Okay.”

“Samantha just text. She’s out at the gate. I just buzzed her in.”

“Where are you two off too?”

“Mother. Where is your brain? I explained this to you last night and this morning. We are going to watch Tricia’s dive competition.”

“Oh yes. My mind is going in circles. I have so much to do before my mother arrives.”

“She’ll understand.” Erika told her mother. “We just went through losing our house in a fire. I just went through brain surgery and that is only in the past few weeks.”

“Have fun.” Her mother bid.

Erika pulled on her coat, stuffed her wallet and phone in her pocket and headed out.

The swim/dive meet was busier than she had expected. Only a few of the cheerleaders had shown up to cheer on the team. Erika had been too drained over the past few days to show much interest. She waved at Tricia, who seemed to be concentrating on what she was doing.

A starting pistol cracked, startling her. She looked over to see Julian diving into the water. A few seconds later he came to the surface and began swimming hard.

“Go Julian!” She doubted that he could hear her, but it felt good to support him just the same.

She and Samantha found seats and continued cheering as he made his turn and pushed off for the other wall. He was in second. The person in first was half a body length ahead of him, but Julian didn’t seem to be gaining any. The rest of the swimmers were way behind him.

“Wow, look at his shoulders.” Samantha watched with appreciation. “And you don’t want that?”

“Nope.” Erika stated. “I’m a breast girl.”

Samantha shook her head. “Well, can I have him?”

“Sure. I noticed that you haven’t been dating this year.”

“I want out of the jock arena and something a bit different.” Samantha stated. “I’ve been hurt by too many jocks. Time for some brains with a bit of muscle.”

“You don’t consider Julian a jock?”

“Nah. Oh, he’s athletic, sure. But he is also very smart. And after how I saw him treat you, Well, He’s a good guy.”

Erika nodded. “I think so.”

Samantha waved across the pool. “Hi Stan!” she yelled.

Erika looked up and waved too.

Julian took second as it looked to be expected. He seemed to be happy with that.

Erika smiled as she watched Samantha watching Julian climb out of the pool and grab his towel. “You should come to church with me and my mom.” She told Samantha.

“Why?”

“Because Julian is a regular there.”

“Oh?” Samantha looked surprised. “Maybe I will.”

The Swim team came in second among the five schools represented. They only missed first by a few points.

“I thought I heard familiar voices.” Julian joined them. He wrapped first Erika up in a hug, and then Samantha. “What do I owe this pleasure?”

“Don’t flatter yourself, Julian.” Erika teased. “We’re here to watch Tricia.”

“I should have known. I haven’t seen you two much in a while.”

“I’ve been real busy.” Erika smiled. “Brain tumor, house burning down, finding a new house, getting ready for Christmas….”

“Modeling at photo shoots.” Samantha added.

Erika slapped Samantha’s arm. “I was keeping that quiet.”

“You are modeling?” Julian beamed. “Wow, I went to Homecoming with a lesbian model. I’ll have to add that to my stories to tell my grandkids.”

“It was only one modeling job.” Erika tried to play it down. I doubt I’ll do much more.”

“Why? You are beautiful.” Julian gave her a knowing look. “I’m sure I’ll see your face on billboards in no time.”

“Perhaps sooner than you think.” Samantha added.

“Samantha, enough.” Erika warned.

“Fine.” Samantha huffed.

“Okay, Julian.” Erika looked to her friend. “Again, I have no idea of what I am looking at when it comes to diving. You’ve gotta help us out.

“Wow, she’s pretty good.” Julian watched as Tricia broke the surface with barely a splash. Watch over there, here goes Stan.”

Erika looked up to a high platform. Stan was balancing on the end with his toes. He leaped up into the air and spun and summersaulted before entering the water.
“Wow. He is amazing.”

“He should be. He practices all the time. He will be trying out for the Olympics this next time around.”

“Wow. That is so cool.”

The three cheered on their friends. Stan ended up scoring the highest in every dive. Tricia fluctuated between second and third in her group. All in all a very good meet.
Julian excused himself and went into the locker room to change.

“Are you up for some shopping tonight?” Erika asked her friend. “I need a dress for my dad’s co-worker’s Christmas party.”

“Oh, I guess I can spare a couple of hours for that.” Samantha teased.

Tricia came out, her hair almost dry was styled kind of messy spiky. She smiled at Erika as she approached, then looked up in the stands and waved. Erika turned around and saw that Tricia’s parents were sitting up there waving back.

“I’ll be right back.” She said passing her two friends.

“I didn’t see them up there.” Erika felt bad for not noticing her girlfriend’s parents.

“Neither did I.” Samantha agreed. “They probably came in after we did.”

A few minutes later, Tricia came back down and gave Erika a big kiss.

“You were amazing.” Erika told her once Tricia had pulled back.

“Second and third. Not too bad.” Tricia agreed. “Did you see Stan?”

Both girls nodded.

“I’ll be as good as him by the time I’m a senior.” Tricia smiled. “This school’s coach is pretty good.”

“You’re almost that good now.” Erika told her. Julian was impressed and told us how great you were doing.”

Tricia blushed a bit.

“We are going to the mall.” Erika changed the subject. “I need a Holiday dress for Christmas parties.”

“Oh, that reminds me.” Tricia interrupted. “Your stuff was delivered today. So we need to stop by my house.”

“Then let’s get going.” Samantha prompted.

Erika carefully removed her breast forms and set them aside for cleaning. She hated taking them off. The weight pulling on her chest felt comfortable after all of these months. Removing them felt as if someone had amputated a part of her body. Erika showered and shaved including the few hairs that had grown under her breast forms.

Once out of the shower, she dried off, and quickly put her gaff on. That appendage was becoming a nuisance. She was starting to wonder what it would be like to no longer have it between her legs. She then went through the task of cleaning her breast forms. She laid them on her bathroom counter to dry as she dried off the skin on her chest.

She touched her flat areolas and wondered what it would be like to actually cup her own breasts. She was on testosterone blockers now, and yes that was a victory and another step towards her becoming a woman, but she wanted estrogen. She wanted to feel softer skin, less body hair. She wanted to see softer fetchers in her face and more curves in her pelvis. She was noticing these subtle and not so subtle nuances in her friends. She was starting to become envious.

She sighed heavily. She’d have to start pressuring her Doctors into allowing her to start hormone replacement.

After finally getting her forms attached and the edges blended, she looked for a long while in the mirror. She was shocked at how she felt ‘whole’ again. She cupped the breast forms in her hands. Her hands and eyes said that they were hers, but her mind and her chest revealed the lie. She picked up on them slightly and felt the pull of the skin on her chest. No, it just wasn’t the same. She wondered what it would be like to have real breasts and how it would feel for Tricia to trace real areolas with her tongue. Or how her lips would feel as she caressed real breast tissue.

Erika dropped her hands and squeezed the counter. She wanted to scream with frustration, but she didn’t want her parents knowing what was going on in her head. These were conversations for her Doctors first.

She’d have to email Aunt Carrie and see if she could get a list of those herbs again. She just wanted to start seeing changes. The right changes.

She had never been to an adult Christmas party. She suspected there would be boring conversations and cocktails, but who knew. She would find out in just a few hours.

Erika slowly pulled the black nylons up over her legs. The feeling of them encasing her freshly shaved legs was intoxicating. She was thrilled to feel the difference. She had spent a lot more money on these and they felt it. These were not they drug store Leggs brand panty-hose, these were high end department store silk stockings. A chill charged through her body as she drew them over her knees. She stood and finished pulling them on. She then reached down and ran her fingertips from her ankle up her calf and to her knee thrilled with how they felt.

Smiling to herself, she slipped into her new red sweater dress that hugged her curves, natural and fake. She pulled on the hem which ended just above her knees and arranged the neckline to show a hint of cleavage but not enough that her father would feel uncomfortable.

The three-quarter length sleeves begged for something on her wrist. She pulled out a small decorative chain bracelet with a charm and secured it in place.

The necklace that her father had given her for the family photos would be perfect around her neck, dainty, but effectively showing some sparkle under her chin, but Enough to draw the eye up from her cleavage.

Erika stood in front of the mirror and smiled, a bit giddy at the reflection that she was seeing. Lipstick matching the color of the dress enhanced her pouty lips and framed her smile. Dark smoky eyes were framed by her natural long dark lashes and blunt, long fringe.

Her long dark curls had been ironed smooth and were shiny with gloss. The ends of her hair brushed and caressed an open back in her dress.

Tear drop shaped glass beads hung from a fine chain attached to her earlobes. She tucked one side of her hair to show off her ears and their adornment and smiled.

“Are you ready, Erika?” her mother called.

“Coming.” She hollered back. She did a split second final inspection then slid her legs into black heeled boots. She pulled the zippers up securing her ankles and calves, grabbed a small purse that already held her lipstick, and cell phone and walked out to join her parents by the front door.

“Holy…..” her father couldn’t finish, His mouth worked like a fish out of water, searching for the right words.

“You are definitely going to draw some attention.” Her mother smiled.

“Too much?” Erika bit her lip suddenly uncertain.

Her father just shook his head.

“No, dear, you look amazing. Who taught you to do your makeup like that?”

“The artists at the photoshoots.” Erika smiled.

“You look incredible, honey.” Her father finally managed.

“Thank you, Daddy.” She took a step forward and planted a kiss on his cheek. She stepped back and giggled.

“I’ll get that.” Her mother chuckled. She pulled out a tissue and wiped Erika’s lip print off of his cheek.

Erika stood behind her parents on the front stoop of the Klaus’ house as her father rang the doorbell.

“John, Nancy.” Mr. Klaus greeted.

“Merry Christmas, Vince.” Her father greeted back as he stepped into the foyer. “Vince, you know my wife, Nancy.” He introduced. “And this is my daughter, Erika.”

“Welcome.” Mr. Klaus greeted. “Aparna, the Martins are here.”

Erika was surprised when a Hindi woman came out of the kitchen wearing a beautiful green with gold accented sari. “Welcome and Merry Christmas.” She approached with a large smile.

“Aparna, this is John, Nancy, and their daughter, Erika.” He introduced.

“Vince has nothing but high praise for you, John.” She greeted. She turned to Erika’s mother. “Nancy, welcome. Please come in, let me take your coats.”

“So good to meet you, Aparna.” Her mother smiled. She held out a bottle of wine awkwardly. “John didn’t tell me that you were Hindi, I brought wine.” She apologized.

“Nonsense.” Aparna waved away the thought. “I converted to Christianity years ago, and I absolutely love a good wine.”

“Your sari is beautiful.” Her mother complimented.

“Very pretty.” Erika added.

“Thank you.” Aparna beamed. “I may be American now, but I still love bits of my old life.”

“With fabrics and colors like that, I would too.” Her mother agreed.

“Grace!” Aparna called again. “Bring the tray.” The Hindi woman took their coats and hung them in the closet off to the side.

Erika was instantly enthralled with the thick braid that fell down Aparna’s back to the back of her knees.

“I had to fill the glasses, mother.” A young woman approached.

“John, Nancy, this is my daughter Grace.” Mr. Klaus introduced. “Grace, this is Mr. and Mrs. Martin, and their daughter Erika.”

“Champagne?” Grace offered.

“Thank you.” Her mother took a glass.

“John, it is fine by us, if it is okay with you, that Erika can have some too.” Vince approached a touchy subject. “It is a Christmas party after all.”

Erika’s father looked to her mother. “It’s a controlled environment.” She told him. “I think it is fine.”

Erika was stunned, but was pleased to see Grace’s smile widen. Erika took a glass and took a small sip of the bubbly.

“Please, come in.” Mr. Klaus invited. “The party is in the back of the house.”

Erika could hear other adult voices coming from what looked to be a family room beyond the kitchen. She caught sight of a few women dressed to the nines shuffling from the kitchen to the back.

“Hi, Grace.” Erika greeted as the parents stepped ahead of them.

“Merry Christmas, Erika.” Grace made a more informal greeting. “I’m sorry, if I looked stunned. My father told me that the Martins had a son.”

Grace had beautiful, mocha-colored skin. Not as dark as her mother’s but nearly flawless. Her nose, Erika decided, she received from her father, it wasn’t nearly as strong as her mother’s. Her ebony hair, not as shiny or as smooth as Melinda’s, bounced in curls just past her shoulders. She was wearing a beautiful red silk sari-like top over a pair of jeans.

“I was a tomboy until recently.” Erika smiled.

“Well, I’m glad you’re here.” Grace walked Erika off to a separate room from the parents. “You go to Washington High, right?”

“Yes. You?”

“I’m a Senior at Adams.”

“Oh, do you know the Wilson twins?”

“Who at Adams doesn’t. They have made quite an impact in the short time that they have been there. Did you know that Annie is a Tranny?”

“Uh, no. I mean I have heard rumors.” Erika professed. So, it was Annie who was just like her. She needed to make more of an effort to befriend the girls.

“It’s kind of weird.” Grace stated. “but hey, to each their own.” Grace grabbed a glass of champagne from a table and took a long sip. “I’m glad that I don’t have to be bored amongst the adults. Thanks for coming.”

“I’m glad that I did.” Erika nodded with a smile. She might actually have a good time after all. She took another draw of her champagne and nearly choked as they entered a garage turned family room. Sitting in a chair playing on the X-box was Jake from Mrs. Anderson’s class.

“Hey, you two know each other?” Grace asked. “Jake goes to Washington too.”

Erika wanted to turn and run out of the room. No, she wanted to run back to her condo, heeled boots or not. Not Jake.

Jake looked from his game to the doorway. His jaw dropped and he just stared. “Erika?”

“Hi, Jake.” Erika hoped her voice didn’t tremble. She finished off the champagne and waved the glass. “anymore?” She squeaked.

“Damn, girl, you dress up nice.” Jake closed his mouth, but his eyes hadn’t blinked. The character on his game died, but he didn’t seem to notice.

“I’ve actually stashed some in my mini-fridge.” Grace went over to a mini-bar and pulled out a bottle.

Jake got up and approached Erika. His eyes scanned her. “Merry Christmas.” He smiled. He enfolded her in a hug.

Erika went stiff at first then began to relax just before he pulled back. “Fancy meeting you here, huh?” he grinned. “You play GTA?”

“It’s been a while.” Erika admitted.

“Here.” Grace poured more champagne into Erika’s glass. She leaned in. “You and Jake have a history?”

“We have a class together.” She drank half of her glass.

“There are drinks in the fridge. I’ve got chips and stuff over there.” Grace pointed. “The fancy foods are out in the kitchen.”

“Thanks.” Erika felt her head start feeling fuzzy.

“Any more coming?” Jake asked.

“I have no idea.” Grace shrugged. “My boyfriend should be here soon. I just knew about you two for sure, but others may come.”

“Come have a seat.” Jake patted the open seat next to him on the loveseat. “You need to see if you have what it takes to kick my ass.”

Erika smoothed her dress under her as she nervously took the offered seat.

“Grace, did you hear that Erika’s house burned down?”

“That, was you?” Grace exclaimed. “I’m so sorry. Did you lose everything?”

Erika nodded. “But hey, I’m getting a new wardrobe out of it.” She’d rather look on the bright side.

“You didn’t lose any pets, did you?” Grace asked.

“No. We didn’t have any. My mom isn’t fond of animals.”

“Well I guess that is a blessing.” Grace smiled. “I’m a dog person. My puppy is shut up in my room, poor thing.”

“Why are you keeping Gisella in there? She is the sweetest puppy.” Jake asked.

“Some people like Erika’s mother don’t like them.”

“I like them.” Erika insisted. “Could you bring your puppy in here?”

“Perhaps, if we keep this door shut.” Grace smiled. “I’ll go get her.”

“So, how are you doing?” Jake inquired.

“Fine.” She didn’t know what to say or even what to talk about with this guy who teased her as Eric and Erika. He wasn’t involved in the flagpole incident, that she knew of but he had tripped Eric in the halls or thrown things at him. As Erika, he only teased verbally, but then there was that weird day when he actually seemed to care if she was alright after her event on the basketball court. “So how do you know the Klaus’?”

“My parents are friends with hers.” He shrugged. “Just about every party, we are invited too. Grace is pretty cool. She’s one of those super smart girls. You know kind of like Victoria.”

Erika nodded.

“You?” He asked, “How do you come by this party?”

“Our dad’s work together.”

“Here she is.” Grace entered with a large dog. She closed the door behind her while struggling to hold onto the large dog’s collar.

“Whoa, that is one big puppy.” Erika was shocked. “What kind is she?”

Grace smiled. “She’s a Ridgeon ridgeback Poodle mix.”

“She is beautiful.” Erika took the eager dogs head in her hands. What’s her name again?”

“Gisella.”

“Beautiful.” Erika giggled as Gisella licked her hand.

“She’ll settle down in a minute. There is just so much activity going on and she wants to be a part of it all.”

“Hey, Grace, did you dad make any eggsnog?” Jake chuckled.

Grace’s rolled her eyes. “He sure did.”

“Do you want any?” Jake smirked and threw Grace a weird look.

Grace had a pure sounding fun laugh, “Sure. I don’t know if he wants us drinking it after last year though.”

“Erika?” he lightly patted her knee. “You want some?”

Grace’s laugh turned to a cackle.

Was he trying to flirt with her? That was what a guy did in the beginning stages of flirting, wasn’t it? “I’m good, but I think I’ll see what is out there to nibble on.”

Jake held out his hand. Erika paused not knowing exactly what to do. She raised her hand which he grabbed and effortlessly pulled her to her feet. He did have the broad shoulders of a running back. Jake’s shoulders were beefy, knotted type muscles, where Julian’s broad shoulders were streamlined but no less powerful.

“Gisella, lay down. Lay down. Good girl.” They heard Grace command as they left the room.

“There you are.” Erika’s mother greeted as they entered the kitchen. “I was just about to check on you.”

“I’m fine.” Erika smiled.

Her mother looked to Jake and smiled.

“Uh, mom. This is Jake. He’s in my Language Arts class.”

“Hello Jake. Your family are friends with the Klaus’, right?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“You aren’t getting drunk or anything, are you?” She looked at Erika.

“Mom?” it was almost a whine.

“You should try the artichoke spread.” Her mother pointed.

“Aparna makes a great hummus too.” Jake pointed to a bowl.

Her mother scooped a large dollop on to her plate and added some pita chips to go with it. “Thank you, Jake.”

Erika began filling her plate with finger foods. There were a lot of things that she didn’t know what they were, but they looked delicious.

“You’ll want a few extra of those.” Jake told her as she picked up some items. “I can’t pronounce them, but they are great. Stay away from that plate.” He cautioned. “but you’ll want to grab some of those.”

Erika followed his lead as he filled a plate as well. She noticed Jake kept looking into the family room full of the adults talking.

“What’s going on?”

“Stand right there and look like you are studying the cheese tray. If the woman in the blue sparkly dress looks this way, warn me.”

“What are you doing?”

“Grabbing the eggnog.” He whispered.

“You have to sneak it?” Erika asked under her breath.

“After last year, probably, yes.” He snickered. “Okay. I’m going to take these back. Meet you there.” He had three large glasses of eggnog in his hands.

“Erika,” her mother called. “Come meet Aparna’s mother.”

Erika set her plate down on the edge of the table and stepped into the living room. Her mother was sitting down next to a very wrinkled, very elderly Hindi woman in a Sari. She even had her head covered in the beautiful purple fabric.

“This is my daughter, Erika.” Her mother introduced. “Erika this is Aparna’s mother, Sadguna.”

Erika almost curtsied, but bowed her head instead.

The elderly woman took her hand in her cold gnarled one and patted it with the other as she smiled at Erika.

Erika wanted to leave, but the grandmother kept a firm hold on her hands. Erika just smiled back as her mother talked to the two of them.

“Nani, I see you have met Erika.” Grace appeared. “I need to introduce her to Gisella.”

Grace’s grandmother released Erika’s hands and smiled as the two girls left. Erika grabbed her plate and another glass of champagne.

“Sorry about that.” Grace grabbed a bottle of the bubbly. “Nani tends to latch on to people. “I wonder if you mother knows that she only understands one in five words of English.” She chuckled. “here, hold this.” She handed Erika the bottle while she grabbed an empty cup.

“I doubt my mother would even care.” Erika took a sip of the sparkling wine.

“Gisella is too wound up. I had to put her back in my room.” Grace apologized.

“Oh?” Erika pouted.

“My boyfriend is here too.” Grace almost bounced down the hall. She probably would have if she didn’t have her hands full. “We’ve decided to put on a movie. Hope you don’t mind.”

“Nope.” Erika bit into something that Jake had recommended. It was incredible.

“Miguel, this is Erika.” Grace introduced as they entered.

“Feliz Navidad.” Miguel greeted from the entertainment center.

“Hi.” Erika turned to Grace. “Is this all yours?” She asked referring to the garage conversion.

“I wish.” Grace filled Erika’s glass then poured each of the guys a glass. “I have an older brother who is in the Navy and a little brother who is spending the weekend with friends. It’s rare that Miguel and I get to have it alone.”

Miguel pushed play and sat in a recliner. Grace handed him his glass and eased into his lap.

“Erika, could you get the lights?” Grace asked.

Erika found the switch and waited by the door for a few seconds for her eyes to get accustomed to the low light.

“Here, Erika.” Jake offered the spot next to him again.

As Erika sat down, Jake stretched his arm across the back of the loveseat behind her. Conscious of it, she didn’t want to call him out. It could be just an innocent way of getting comfortable.

“Erika.” Miguel said with a Spanish accent. “Jake says that you are a cheerleader at Washington high.”

“Yes.” She answered. “Well, actually Rally squad.” What else did Jake tell them about her?

“I heard that one of them has a brain tumor.”

How did he hear about that? It wasn’t a secret, but she didn’t think that everyone in Constitution knew.

“That is me.” Erika tried to shrug it off.

“Hold on.” Grace sat up. “You have a brain tumor?”

“No.” Erika tried to calm her down. “I had it removed a few weeks ago.”

“Seriously?” Grace was having a hard time believing it.

“Yes. I’m fine, now.” Erika finished off the glass and poured herself another. Her head was definitely fuzzy now. “What is this?” She asked. “Even in the dim light put out by the T.V. she could tell that what she poured was not champagne.

“Eggsnog.” Grace laughed.

“Eggnog?” Erika took a sip. It was definitely eggnog.

Jake and Grace both laughed.

“What’s so funny?” Erika asked. “Did you put something in my drink?”

“No.” Grace was definite. “It’s just an inside joke between Jake and I.”

Jake chuckled.

Miguel asked. “Didn’t they have to shave your head or something?”

“They went in through my nose.” Erika explained.

Erika could see Miguel cringe. “Ouch.”

“I got a free nose job out of it.” Erika stated.

“Really?” Jake asked. “I thought your nose was cute before. What did they do to it?”

“Just fixed my deviated septum.” Erika loved telling people that she got a nose job. Did Jake just say that she had a cute nose?

“Did it hurt?” Grace asked.

“I was on pain meds for a while, so I couldn’t really tell you. I think it did.”

“Erika, did you try one of these?” Jake held up a piece of food in his fingers. He held the morsel close to her face. Erika opened her mouth and he popped it in.

“Mm hmm.” She chewed the bit and swallowed. “I did, those are good.”

“How about this?” Jake held forth another.

Erika opened her mouth again as he set it on her tongue. His fingers brushed her lips as he removed them. Erika tasted it “Ooh, what is that?”

“I don’t know. I can’t pronounce half of the things Aparna makes, but they all taste fantastic.”

Erika chased the food with some more of the eggnog. She reached to her plate and picked up something and offered it to Jake. He opened his mouth and Erika placed it on his tongue. His lips closed around her finger as she withdrew, the sensation sent chills up her arm and down her spine.

He swallowed and opened his mouth signaling for more. Erika picked up another bite and did the same. Again, his lips closed around her finger. This time she was slower at withdrawing it.

What are you doing? She asked herself. This is Jake. She pushed the plate aside.

She sipped at her glass some more and pretended to watch the movie as Jake became very present in her mind. He wasn’t touching her, but all either one of them had to do was move a centimeter and they would. His masculine smell was very apparent in her nose. She couldn’t decide if she liked it. She was so used to Tricia’s sweet fragrance.

Erika drained the last of her glass.

“Here, may as well hand her the bottle.” Grace giggled as she handed the bottle to Jake who took a few swallows then handed it to Erika. She took a swallow and set it to the side.

Her eyes were feeling heavy when Jake nudged her. She snapped her head up and opened her eyes. He nudged her again. She looked over to see Grace curled up in a lip lock with Miguel.

She smiled. Grace and Miguel were a cute couple. She hoped the best for them. Her eye lids protested and soon closed again. She eventually became aware that she was leaning against Jake, her head against his shoulder. His arm was wrapped around her protectively. That was something that Tricia didn’t do. It felt good to feel that someone could protect you like that. It made her feel warm and tingly inside. She looked up at the football player. He was watching her. Was he watching her sleep? Was he protecting her while she slept against his shoulder? What a sweetheart. Their eyes locked and gazed at one another.

Erika bit her lower lip, confused at her feelings and what she should do. Should she pull back? His light embrace felt too good.

She didn’t have to figure it out. She felt his lips against hers. Part of her wanted to pull back and run out of the room. After all this was Jake. But a spark in her, an electric feeling connecting her lips to her heart told her not to move, but instead to reciprocate.

Erika Shifted to a better position and felt his large fingers caressing her face like a feather, so gentle, so tender. She kissed back, tasting him for the first time. Her tongue flicked against his lips seeking entry and was granted. Their tongues touched sending sparks up and down her spine. She shifted further, so that she was kneeling, straddling his leg, both of her hands grasped the sides of his face as she kissed him.

Jake pulled back to take a breath. “I didn’t know you liked guys.”

“I didn’t know you could be nice.” She said back through fuzzy thoughts. Her lips met his again.

His hands touched her knee and slowly, but firmly slid up her thigh. She pulled a hand away from his face and pushed his hand down. “No.” She said between kisses.

His hand reached behind and grabbed ahold of her butt and gave it a gentle squeeze. She couldn’t believe she didn’t mind.

A bright light blinded her, causing her to pull back in shock.

“Guess it’s a good thing I decided to come check on you.” Mr. Klaus stood in the doorway.

Erika tried to control her breath as she shakily got her feet under her.

“Dad.” Grace complained.

Mr. Klaus just stood there. “So, Miguel, I think it’s time you went home.” He stated. “Grace, why don’t you take Erika up to your mother’s bathroom. Jake. You should probably go into the bathroom down here.”

Grace got up and tried to pull herself together as Miguel got up and approached Mr. Klaus.

“I… I… um.” Miguel tried to speak.

“We’ll talk about this later.” He told Miguel. “Just be glad I’m in the Christmas spirit.” He made room for Miguel to leave.

“You three will join the adults in the other room when you are done.” He turned and headed back to the party.

“Oh my God.” Grace giggled. “I am so busted.”

Jake grinned. “Eggsnog.”

Grace burst into laughing as she took Erika’s hand and led her upstairs to her mother’s master bathroom.

“Crap.” Erika swore. “Is he going to tell my parents?”

“I doubt it.” Grace laughed. “Um, you have lipstick all over your face.”

Erika joined Grace in cleaning up and reapplying their makeup.

“Jake told me you were a lesbian.” Grace stated.

“I am, I mean, I… I… It has to be the eggnog.” She flushed.

Grace laughed again.

“What is it?” Erika redid her lips.

“Egg snog.” Grace pronounced it slowly separating it into two words. “Last year, Jake and I had too much eggnog and were found in my bedroom in the same position you and her were found in.”

“With Jake?”

“Sure. He’s a good-looking guy. And once you get past his rough defensive barrier, he’s quite sweet.’

Erika thought on that for a moment. She also thought on what her mother might do if she found out what happened tonight.

“How do I look?” Grace asked.

“Beautiful.” Erika smiled at her new friend. “How about me?”

Grace studied her for a moment. “You look amazing. I wish I had your eyelashes.”
Erika blushed.

The two girls joined the adults in the family room. Jake was standing amongst some men. He looked up with a sparkle in his eyes and smiled at Erika. Erika couldn’t help but smile back.

What was she doing? This is Jake. What’s he going to do or say at school? She almost groaned. He was a good kisser, and as Grace pointed out, he seemed to be nice, once you got past his jabbing jibes.

“There you are.” Erika’s mother approached with a smile. “Vince said that you were bored watching a movie and decided to join us.”

He didn’t tell her? Erika’s mind sighed with relief as she pasted a smile on her face.

“Would you like to try some eggnog?” her mother asked.

Both Erika and Grace burst out laughing.

“Did I say something funny?”

“Inside joke, mom.” Erika managed to get out. “I think I need to eat. Grace, can you show me what I’ve been enjoying?”

“Of course,” Grace led her back into the kitchen.

---

“What lovely people.” Erika’s mother stated as they drove home. “You and Grace seemed to have hit it off.”

“Yes.” Erika agreed. “She was very nice.”

“Was it interesting seeing Jake from school there? He seemed nice too.”

Interesting was hardly the word to describe seeing him. She was kissing him. Kissing him and liking it. She kissed Julian. He too was a good kisser, but she didn’t feel the spark with him that she did with Jake.

“Yes, he seems nicer away from school.” Erika commented absently.

How was she going to tell Tricia? Should she tell Tricia? Oh Lord, what has she done? What if Tricia takes it personally again and goes off and does something stupid? No, she shouldn’t tell Tricia. But what if Jake says something? If Jake said something, then She would have to tell Tricia and then Tricia would be even angrier that she didn’t tell her. Should she keep Samantha out of the loop too? Samantha wouldn’t tell Tricia, but what if Samantha slipped and Tricia found out? Oh God, she screwed things up again. Everything was going so well, and she had to go and screw everything up.

She hit her head against the back of her seat and closed her eyes. Eggsnog.

by Anistasia Allread

Erika played with her French toast more than she ate it. She was still trying to figure out if she should admit to Tricia that she had yet again, screwed up her trust.

“So, I just got an interesting email.” Her father came in and piled some French toast on to his own plate.

“What’s that?” her mother asked.

“That photographer who did the last shoot.” Her father perked her up and had her attention. “Well, he has been hired to do another shoot and would like Erika to join in.”

“Joe?” Erika asked.

“That’s the one.”

“What is the product this time?”

“for a local spa? I don’t think I’ve heard of it.”

“Hmm. I’ll ask around. When is the shoot?”

“The twenty-ninth.”

“After Christmas, then. Okay. I’ll ask around and see if anyone has heard of the place.

“If we start getting more offers,” her father stated, “I’ll have to hire you a manager and possibly an agent.”

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” Her mother joined. “We don’t know how or where this will be going.”

“I’m just saying.” Her father said. “I am not an expert in the field. I have no idea what the running rates for models are, or even how to structure their contracts. If this goes much further, we’ll have to hire someone.”

Erika’s mother looked at her phone. “I’ve got to go pick up my mother.” She sighed. “You want to come?” She asked Erika.

“Samantha is coming by. She’s taking me to church.”

“Please clean the kitchen before you go.” Her mother excused herself.

Erika pushed the French toast around her plate a bit more. She barely slept, she kept thinking about her make out session with Jake. Had she really been the aggressor? She knew that he had kissed her first, but she was straddling him and kissing him, not the other way around. Tricia would break up with her for sure if she found out. She’d have to keep it from her. She wanted to tell someone though.

“Penny for your thoughts?” her father tried to lock Erika’s gaze.

“Oh, just stuff at school.” Erika lied.

“You aren’t being bullied, again are you?” her father sounded concerned.

“No. Nothing like that.”

“You have fun at the party last night?”

“Yes. Grace was fun.”

“Okay, just checking in with you.” He smeared his last bite of French toast all through the syrup on his plate before putting it in his mouth. He got up and set his dish in the sink.

Erika didn’t know if she should call Jake and ask him to keep quiet or if that would only make it worse. She took her plate over to the sink, rinsed it before sticking it in the dishwasher. He’d probably hold it over her or tease her even more if he found out that she was nervous about people finding out about it.

She quickly cleaned up the breakfast mess and changed before Samantha showed up.

“So, how did the party go last night?” Samantha greeted as Erika got into the car.

It went great.” Erika flushed. “Met a new friend, Grace from Adams High.”

“Oh?” Samantha urged her to go on.

“Yeah, her dad is German and her mother is Hindi. The food was fantastic.”

“What did you do?”

“Drank too much champagne. Hung out.”

“Anyone else you know, there?”

“You know, it was the strangest thing.” Erika hoped she wasn’t as red as she felt. “Jake and his family are friends with Grace’s family so he was there too, and Grace’s boyfriend Miguel.”

“Jake from Language Arts?”

“Yes.”

“Was he a prick all night?”

“You know, he was actually pretty cool.” Erika looked blankly out the window, primarily so that Samantha wouldn’t see her face.

“Jake? Cool? I find that hard to believe.”

“Maybe he’s different when he isn’t at school.” Erika offered still not looking at Samantha.

Samantha was quiet for a long moment. Erika dared a glance at her friend and found her glancing from the road to Erika and back to the road.

“What aren’t you telling me?” Samantha demanded. “You are acting very cagy and not like yourself. What happened?”

“Well…” Erika began. She stopped. How was she going to do this? “You have to promise not to tell a soul.” She would have stomped her foot if she thought it would have added effect in the car,

“I won’t tell.” Samantha promised.

“No one.” Erika was adamant.

“I won’t tell my own mother.” Samantha was getting frustrated.

“It’s not your mother I’m worried about.” Erika stated.

“What happened, did he kiss you?” Samantha rolled her eyes.

Erika was quiet.

“No.” Samantha burst. “No way. Jake kissed you?”

“I had a lot to drink and my head was fuzzy.” Erika defended.

“Oh, my God!” Samantha exclaimed. “You and Jake kissed!”

“You can’t tell Tricia.” Erika commanded. “You just can’t.”

“Is he a good kisser?”

Sheepishly, “Yes. I guess.”

“Now you have to tell me.” Samantha pulled over and stopped the car.

“No I don’t.” Erika was starting to get agitated.

“Erika Martin.” Samantha rose her voice but she was still smiling. “We know each other’s deepest darkest secrets, we have been best friends for, well since the beginning of summer. You have to tell me.”

“I don’t want Tricia finding out. It’ll crush her.” Erika protested.

“My lips are sealed. But you should do some extra praying in church if you want Jake to keep his sealed.”

Erika explained the best that she could of what happened with Jake at the party.

“You whore.” Samantha giggled. “You really took control? You, Erika Martin, the most submissive person I know, was taking charge of a football player. A cute one too I might add.”

“You think Jake is cute?”

“Duh, and apparently, you do too. Since you’re the one who was all over him.”

“God, I knew I shouldn’t have told you.” Erika hid her face in her hands. “What am I going to do?”

“Well, for starters, hope he doesn’t say anything. But if he does, you can’t let anyone know that it bothers you. Own it. Let them know that he was eating out of your hand, not the other way around.”

“What about Tricia?”

“Yeah, that is a hard one.” Samantha settled down. “She will take it hard regardless.”

“I know.” Erika still had her face buried in her hands. “What do I do?”

“Stay away from alcohol, obviously.” Samantha couldn’t help but snicker.

“Eggsnog.” Erika began giggling.

“What?” Samantha asked.

“Eggsnog.” Erika’s giggling became laughing.

“I don’t get it?” Samantha was trying to laugh with her friend.

Erika had to tell Samantha about eggsnog.

“That makes so much more sense now.” Samantha laughed with her. “I think I need to meet Grace.” Samantha pulled back out into traffic and drove to the church.

“I hope they are here this week.” Erika muttered to herself.

“You said that Julian would be here, right?” Samantha was scanning the crowd heading into the sanctuary.

“He usually is.”

Erika led Samantha into the church. It was much warmer in there and the stained glass as well as the lit candles seemed to give it a warmer feel.

“There they are.” She nudged Samantha.

“Julian?”

“No. The Wilson twins.” Erika muttered only for Samantha’s ears. “Annie looks to be doing better.”

“The Wilson Twins? I thought we were here to see Julian?”

“We are here to worship God.” Erika instructed, “But I also like and would like to spend more time with Allie and Annie.”

“Isn’t one of them the one shot in the park because she is … because she is like you?”

Erika nodded. “They are nice people.”

“Erika? Samantha?” a familiar voice sounded from behind them.

The girls turned. “Julian.” They both greeted at once.

He wrapped both girls a big hug. He looked from one to the other. “How did you get Samantha to come to Mass?” he asked.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” Erika grinned. She looked back over to the Wilson family. There seemed to be a large section of empty seats around them. “Julian, what’s going on with that?” Erika pointed.

Julian grumbled. “It got out that Annie is Transgender and a lot of people of the church have a hard time accepting that.”

“She has always presented as a girl. She looks like girl. Why are they freaking out? Because she has male genitalia?” Erika asked.

“Basically.” Julian shook his head.

“That’s stupid.” Erika walked right over to the Wilson’s “Hello, Allie, Annie.” She greeted. “May my friend and I sit with you?”

“Sure.” Mrs. Wilson smiled.

“Hello, Erika.” Allie greeted. “You sure you want to be seen with us? You have heard the rumors, right?” She was being snarky.

“Even more of a reason for me to join you.” Erika stated. “I was taught that God doesn’t make mistakes. Therefore, Annie is perfect the way she is. If the rest of this church can’t figure that out, then shame on them.”

“Annie, you remember Erika?” Allie asked.

“The cheerleader from Washington.”

Allie nodded. “She came by the hospital while you weren’t doing so well. “and she has been here with us when you were recovering.”

“Thank you, Erika.” Annie smiled. “It sounds like you were a great comfort for my sister.

“It’s called being a decent human unlike some of these people. I can’t believe your church would shun you.”

“They won’t be for long.” Erika didn’t see the priest walk up behind them.

“Father Daniel.” Erika dipped her head. “I’m sorry.”

“You are fairly new here, aren’t you? Haven’t I seen you with Julian?”

“Yes, Father. I’ve only been here a few times. I’m sorry if I’m out of line. I’ll leave if I’m causing too much of a distraction.”

“You are welcome here as are the Wilson’s.”

“Thank you.”

“You need to be as accepting of these scared people as they need to be of this new situation.” He placed a hand on Erika’s shoulder. “People, especially older people don’t like change. We need to allow time for the Lord to open their hearts to these new times and these new changes. It’s not easy for them.” He paused and smiled. “I see the Lord has placed a special heart in you. I hope you will like what I will be talking about today.” He squeezed her shoulder nodded to the Wilson’s and stepped away.

“I think Father Daniel likes you.” Annie smiled at Erika.

Erika couldn’t believe what she had said before Father Daniel had approached. Where had she gotten that kind of courage? Eric would have just cringed and would probably be sitting on the other side of the sanctuary if he would have attended at all. Last night with Jake, helping Stephanie. She was changing in the past few weeks and she kind of liked how.

Erika looked up at the cross Is this your doing? It could have been her imagination, but she felt a warmth flow through her.

“Is it still alright if I sit with you?” Erika asked the twins.

“Please,” Annie patted the pew next to her.

“Where’s your mother?” Mrs. Wilson inquired.

“She had to pick my grandmother up from the airport. I brought my friend Samantha.” Erika looked to Allie and Annie. “She has a crush on Julian.”

The twins started giggling.

“He is good looking, and one of the sweetest guys I’ve met.” Erika went on.

Allie leaned closer to Erika and covered the side of her mouth with her hand. “He is working on becoming a priest.”

“What?” Erika was shocked. “No way. He took me to Homecoming and he did not act like he was looking to become a priest.”

Allie and Annie both laughed.

It wasn’t long before Julian and Samantha joined her and the Wilson’s. The small group like an island on one side of the sanctuary.

During the homily, Erika listened as the Father Daniel hammered in some of the points that she was ranting about. A few older people excused themselves and walked out of church. Quite a few more looked like chastised children. Erika felt a bit of satisfaction, but then remembered Father Daniel’s words to her about being accepting of those with hard hearts and closed minds towards people like Annie and herself.

She and Samantha were unable to take sacrament, but she silently prayed for those with hearts too hurt to accept people like Annie and herself. She included Taylor, Stephanie, and Melinda in those prayers. She then prayed for Annie’s health as well as her acceptance in school and the community.

--oOo—

“Is church always like that?” Samantha asked once they had pulled out of the parking lot.

“Usually not as dramatic. Did you have a nice talk with Julian?”

“Yes. He is such an interesting guy. You know when he’s not swimming, he practically lives at the church?”

“Really?” Erika kept from laughing, but only managed to hold in part of her smile.

“He has a very giving heart.” Samantha was lost in her own mind.

“Yes, he does.” Erika agreed. “He is always, well almost always a gentleman.” She thought back to homecoming dance. She had tempted him to sin. Something about that both saddened and delighted her.

“Are you going to come in?” Erika asked as they pulled up to her condo. “Please.” She added a little beg in there.

“And miss seeing your Grandmother react to you? Are you kidding? Of course, I’m coming in.”

“We’re home.” Erika announced as she and Samantha entered and shed their coats.

“We’re in the kitchen.” Her mother’s voice called.

Erika rounded the corner to see her mother and grandmother sitting at the breakfast bar drinking coffee.

“Erika!” her grandmother got up. “Oh my, let me look at you.”

Erika stood still waiting as her grandmother looked her up and down. “Who would ever believe it.” She said at last and embraced her. She pulled back. “You have breasts? So soon?”

Erika blushed. “They are breast forms, Grandma.” Erika stated. “Falsies.”

Her grandmother took another, closer look. “They look real.”

“That is the whole idea.” Erika smirked. Samantha was standing off to the side. “Grandma, this is my best friend, Samantha.”

“Hello, Samantha. My, aren’t you a pretty one.” She turned and looked at Erika again. “You are right, Nancy. She does look just like you when you were her age.” Her grandmother looked back at Erika. “She does dress and put on makeup better than you ever did.”

“Really mom?” her mother rolled her eyes.

Erika could see Samantha trying not to snicker.

“You know, your mom wanted to be a boy.” Her grandmother shook her head. “Such a beauty and all she wanted to do was get muddy, climb trees and wear grubby clothes.”

“Mother.” Her mom admonished.

“She even smelled like a boy.” Her grandmother wrinkled her nose.

“Mom?” Erika looked to her mother. “I was a tomboy. I grew out of it.”

“You mean you grew breasts and couldn’t keep up with the boys.” Her grandmother corrected.

“You didn’t tell her about the time you and that Billy neighbor came home covered in oil because you were playing in the rainbows?”

“I was four years old, mother.” Erika’s mother growled.

“Okay how about when you were thirteen and you came home the day before school pictures?”

“That was an accident?” her mother protested.

It was her grandmother’s turn to roll her eyes. “She had a goose egg over her eye that was so big and purple it swelled her eye shut, and covered from scalp to sole in scratches. Climbing trees with the boys. She fell and hit her head and fell smack square in a blackberry patch.”

“I didn’t fall.” Her mother said with disdain. “I hit my head.”

“How did you do that? Hmmm?” her grandmother asked.

“I was jumping from the branch of one tree to another. They dared me.”

Erika and Samantha could barely keep track of the story they were laughing so hard.

Her mother and grandmother laughed along with them.

“Are you two hungry?”

“Yes.” They both said at once.

Erika’s mother looked at her quizzically. “The Cottage Café?”

“Yes.” Erika bounced.

“You’re coming to, Samantha.” Her mother gave her a look that said that a decline would not be acceptable.

--oOo—

“Are you going to tell her?” Samantha asked as they sat in the car waiting outside of Tricia’s house.

“I don’t think I should, do you?” Erika bit her bottom lip.

“What if she hears it from another source? Like Jake?”

“I know, I know. Will you help me?” Erika asked from the back seat. If she was going to tell Tricia she felt it would be better on equal ground.

“Of course, but do you think it will do any good?”

“I don’t know. Here she comes.”

“Hey! How was church?” Tricia greeted as she slung her bag into the car.

“It was good. We saw Allie and Annie.” Erika greeted. “And Julian.”

“Things went well with your grandmother?”

“Yes.” Erika grinned big. “She scooped on my mom big time.”

Samantha pulled the car into the school parking lot.

Erika grabbed a hold of Tricia and pulled her into a long lingering kiss. She did taste different. Her sweet fragrance was intoxicating. Tricia pulled back, but Erika grabbed her face between her hands similarly to how she did it with Jake. She forced her tongue between Tricia’s lips. Tricia kissed back. Erika’s fingers slid through Tricia’s short hair and grabbed a bit in back and kept their lips locked.

After a few moments, Erika slowly slid back from her girlfriend. Their lips lightly caressed and bit at each other, then separated.

“Wow. What was that for?” Tricia asked after taking a deep breath.

“I want you to know that I love you.” Erika said looking Tricia in the eye. “No matter what, I love you.”

“I love you too.” Tricia smiled.

“Tricia.” Erika tried to swallow a lump in her throat. Her heart raced. Her voice became very serious. “I need to talk with you.”

“I’ll meet you inside.” Samantha opened the door.

“Hey! You were supposed to help me.” Erika growled.

“Okay.” Tricia looked paranoid. “What is going on. You two are kind of freaking me out.”

Erika turned in the seat to face Tricia. “Something happened this weekend that, well, you are going to hate me.”

“What?” Tricia asked. “Why would I hate you? I love you.”

“I got a bit drunk at my father’s co-worker’s Christmas party.” Erika felt the world start to tip. She double checked to make sure her vision wasn’t going gray. Not yet.

“You don’t hold your alcohol well.” Tricia looked concerned. “What did you do?”

“I kinda kissed a boy.” Erika closed her eyes and braced for the tirade. She was met with silence. She opened her eyes to find Tricia’s lips trembling. Tears welled up in them.

“Again?” her voice wavered. “I thought you had moved past that.”

“I was drunk.” Erika excused herself. “My head was fuzzy, and I wasn’t thinking clearly.”

“Obviously!” Tricia yelled. “Did you like it? Kissing a boy? Again?”

“I like kissing you.” Erika stated.

“You haven’t kissed me like that in a very long time.” Tricia screamed.

“I know, and I’m very sorry. Life has been kind of hectic lately.” Erika was crying now. “It just happened.”

“Was it someone I know?”

Erika nodded. “It didn’t mean anything. It was kind of awkward and we laughed afterward.”

“That is supposed to make me feel better?”

“I have no feelings for him. Like I said, it was awkward.” Erika touched Tricia’s hand.

Tricia pulled away. “Seriously? You kissed a boy?”

Erika nodded. “I didn’t want you finding out from anyone but me. I know you are mad at me.”

“You don’t know how I feel.” Tricia wiped tears from her cheeks. “I’m hurt. Very hurt.”

“I understand and you have every right to be.” Erika tried to sooth her friend.

“Who?”

“Who, what?” Erika asked.

“Who did you kiss?”

“Does it matter?”

“Yes.”

Erika steeled herself for another tirade. “Jake.”

“Jake?” Tricia was confused.

“Jake from Language Arts.”

“You kissed that asshole, and then you kiss me?” Tricia grabbed her school bag and threw open the door.

“I told you I was drunk and it was awkward.” Erika pleaded.

“Don’t talk to me.” Tricia turned away.

“Tricia?” Erika was scrambling out of the car.

“I said don’t talk to me!” she screamed loud enough for everyone in the parking lot to hear as she stalked into the building.

“Crap! What have I done?” Erika wailed.

“That didn’t go very well.” Samantha approached.

“You were supposed to help.” Erika swung at Samantha.

“Sorry, but I don’t know what I could have helped with.”

“Leave me alone.” Erika sobbed. “I just need to be alone.”

“Where? We are at school.”

“Can I sit in your car?”

“It’s freezing out here.”

“I don’t care.”

Samantha handed her the keys. “Please lock it.”

Erika climbed into the back seat and curled into a ball and balled.

---

She was about to doze off when someone rapped on the window. Erika sat up and looked out to see Jake with a tight-lipped, hopeful smile.

“What do you want?” Erika’s eyes burned and she was congested.

Jake opened the door letting the freezing cold in. He slid into the back seat beside her.

“I heard that you were out here.” He stated. “I also heard that Tricia was in fetal position in one of the girl’s bathrooms.”

Erika wanted to cry again. The last thing she wanted was to hurt Tricia.

“Eggsnog.” Jake shook his head.

Erika smiled. She wasn’t feeling the laugh just yet.

“I Love Tricia.” Erika told Jake.

“Oh, I didn’t think we were going steady.” Jake grinned. “We were both feeling the eggsnog. You heard that Grace and I had something similar happen last year, didn’t you?”

Erika nodded.

“It was a bit awkward at first. You know, because our families are such good friends. But we just got over it. It has become one of those family stories that will come up when we are adults looking back at all of the dumb stuff we did.”

“But it sometimes hurts people.”

“I wasn’t going to tell anyone.” Jake told her. “What happens at Christmas parties, stays at Christmas parties. Or at least should.”

“I couldn’t know that.” Erika wiped her nose. “I didn’t want her hearing from anyone else.”

Jake nodded. “Totally understand. You know, it may hurt like hell now, and who knows how this may turn out, but you being honest with Tricia will one day be something special.”

“I don’t get it.” Erika looked at Jake.

“What’s that?”

“How can you be such an Ass hole in there, but be so nice everywhere else?”

“I’ve got a rep to protect.”

“Bull shit.”

Jake was quiet for a moment. “It helps me deal with the everyday crap in school. No one expects much from me. I am after all a dumb football jock.”

“But you aren’t dumb.”

“No one in that building except the teachers know that.” Jake told her. “I’d kind of like to keep it that way too.” He cupped her chin and turned it from side to side. “You need to clean that up, you are a mess. I’ll meet you inside and we’ll go find Tricia. I’ll see if I can try to convince her that you haven’t fallen madly in love with me.”

Erika slapped him on the arm but she was smiling.

“You are beautiful when you smile. Too bad you don’t like guys…. unless your drunk.” He got out of the car before Erika could hit him again.

--oOo--

“Jake, Erika, so glad that you could join us.” Mrs. Anderson greeted as they interrupted the class.

“Sorry, Mrs. Anderson.” Erika quickly found her seat. Tricia scooted her chair away from her.

Erika rubbed her temples. She was starting to get a headache. Most likely from all of the crying she had done this morning. She had been afraid that this would happen. She didn’t know that Jake would keep his mouth shut about the party. What she did was right. She told Tricia the truth. Hopefully Tricia would get over it sooner than later.

“Tricia.” Jake whispered back to her.

“What?” Tricia growled.

“I got kind of drunk the other night and so did Erika.” He tried to keep his voice down. “It really wasn’t planned or anything. It just kind of happened. Please don’t be blaming Erika. She really was pretty drunk.”

“Stay out of it, Jake.”

“I can’t. It’s kind of my fault. I like you both, and don’t want to see you upset at one another.”

“Kind of late for that.” Tricia grumbled. “Just leave me alone.”

Erika’s head ache seemed to be getting worse. “Stop yelling.” She hissed.

“We aren’t yelling.” Tricia looked confused.

“Oh my God.” Erika stood up. Mrs. Anderson, I need to go to the nurse’s office.” Erika didn’t wait, she just walked quickly towards the door.

“She’s having a seizure.” It dawned on Samantha.

Tricia jumped up and ran after Erika, with Samantha right behind her.

“What is going on?” Mrs. Anderson demanded.

“Erika’s starting a seizure.” Samantha called out as she left the room.

Erika’s world was closing in on her again. The gray perimeter around her vision was closing. All she could think was to get to the nurse’s office.

“Erika!” Tricia called down the hall.

Nurse’s office. “Oh no, I’m not going to make it.’ Erika half fell half lay down in the middle of the hall and prepared for what was coming.

“I’ll go for the nurse.” She heard Samantha’s voice.

“I’m here.” Tricia told her. She knelt down next to Erika’s head and slid under her so that if she convulsed she wouldn’t hit her head against the hard tile surface. “I’ve got you. You are safe.”

Erika’s world went black.

“You’ve got this babe.” Eric encouraged as Samantha’s face screwed up in pain and exertion. She was absolutely gorgeous. He wondered if all husbands felt this way when watching their wives give birth.

What could be better? He thought as he drifted off to sleep.

“I think she’s coming around.” A strange voice said.

“I’ve got you.” Tricia told her. “Nothing is going to happen to you.”

“Sick.” Erika tried to roll over.

Tricia grabbed her shoulders and helped her turn just in time to vomit. Luckily, she had been too nervous and upset to eat breakfast. Mostly coffee, and water came up.

“I called the ambulance.” A voice called.

“No. I’m fine.” Erika grunted. “No more hospitals.” God, her head hurt.

“You had a seizure.” The nurse told her.

“You think I don’t know that.” Erika was bitter. “All the hospital does is give me pain meds. I can get those at home.”

“We’ll let the paramedics make that call.” The nurse told her.

“The school policy is to send them to the hospital.” The principal stated as if it were writ in stone.

“Can you open your eyes?” Tricia sounded concerned.

Erika slowly opened them. “It’s just the headache. Lights, sounds, everything hurts.” She complained. “No one saw, did they?”

“No.” Samantha joined in. “Everyone is in class.”

“Thank god. Okay. I think I can sit up.”

Tricia guided her as she rose to sitting position.

“Does this mean that you forgive me?” She dared.

“Forgive, yes. Still mad at, yes. “Tricia stated. “You are going to have to be a very good girl for a while to earn back my trust.”

For some reason, Erika felt giddy inside when Tricia mentioned being ‘a good girl’, but her head hurt too bad to ponder it.

“I’m sorry about the vomit.” She just wanted to stuff her head under her pillows and sleep.

“Janitorial is already on their way. “It’ll be clean before this period is over.”

“Okay. I think I can walk. Can we get to the nurse’s office at least?”

With Tricia and Samantha guiding her, the nurse a few steps ahead, but constantly looking back, Erika made it to the bed in the nurse’s office.

“Your mom will be here in just a few minutes.” The principal stuck her head into the room.

Erika barely nodded her head.

“Tricia, Samantha, head back to class.” The Principal instructed. “I’m sure the nurse can handle it from here.”

--oOo—

Erika walked out to the car with her mother. Thankfully she agreed with Erika that home and bed were the best things for Erika right now.

Her grandmother waved from the front seat as they approached. Erika forced a smile and climbed into the back seat.

“Bad morning, huh?” Grandma asked.

“Yeah.” Erika grunted. “I need pain meds and sleep.”

Erika’s mother started the car and started pulling out of the school’s drive. “Erika, you have to check this out.”

“Hmm.”

“Look out the front window.” Her mother pulled the car to the curb.

Erika leaned forward and looked. “Holy Shit. In front of the school?” She swore. “I’m never going to hear the end of this.”

The giant billboard near the school driveway was being changed out. It now had a twenty-foot-tall picture of Erika’s face smiling on an ad with something to do with lowering your car insurance.

“What?” her grandmother questioned. “You look fantastic. Why wouldn’t you want the school to see you?”

“Because only three people at the school even knew that I was doing that.” It was kind of flattering to see herself larger than life. Were her eyes really that blue? Now she knew what people were talking about when asking about her long eyelashes. They were pretty too. “I figured there would be a few posters put up. Perhaps some advertisements on the side of a bus, but a billboard outside my school? Ugh.” Now she wanted to bury her head for completely different reasons.

She made a mental note to have her father write into the contracts that any advertisement she was in couldn’t be posted with in five thousand feet of the school.

--oOo—

“Hand me your phone.” Her mother stated once they got back to the Condo.

“What? Why?”

“You need your sleep. You can’t sleep if your friends all keep texting you.” She held her hand out.

“Fine.” Erika handed it over. Her mom did have a point.

“Here. Take these.” Her mother rummaged through some pill bottles and handed her some tablets and a glass of water.

“Vicodin?”

Her mother nodded. “And a sleep aid, and your after-seizure medicine.”

“Oh, yes. Thank you.” She was happier about the Vicodin than the others. Anything to take away or at least dull the pain.

--oOo—

“Almost done.” Samantha said around a bobby pin in her mouth. She slipped it out and pushed it through Erika’s hair and fastened it into place. “Well?”

Erika turned her head from side to side as she looked at Samantha’s handy work. “I don’t know how you do it.” She was in awe. Samantha had pinned her curls to the top of her head in such and artistic, beautiful way.

“Let me spray it.” Samantha put a hand on her shoulder to keep her in place as she sprayed hairspray to hold her hair in place.

“Sasha would be proud.” Erika beamed. She picked her crystal dangling earrings up from the counter and placed them in her ears. “Wow.” She turned and gave Samantha a huge hug. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. You’re going to mess up my hair.”

“Oh, sorry.” Erika released her. She turned and admired herself in the mirror. She was wearing the red sweater dress that she had worn to the Christmas party. Instead of nylons she wore black leggings and flats. Julian had warned her that Christmas eve mass was not only long, but there would be a lot of standing. “It would look better with heels, wouldn’t it?”

Samantha nodded. “Julian said flats, so…” Samantha looked down at her own feet in flats.

“Are you girls ready?” Erika’s mom called from the hall.

“Yes, we are coming,” Erika answered. She and Samantha met the rest of the family in the living room. “Mom, you look amazing.” Erika beamed. Her mother was wearing the outfit that she had picked out for her on their shopping trip.

“I may have you go shopping for me.” Her grandmother nodded.

“Samantha is the ace shopper.” Erika directed the attention to her friend.

“You all look amazing. “Her dad took them all in. “we need to get going if we’re picking up Tricia.

The car was pretty cozy as they pulled into the church parking lot.

Erika was dazzled by all of the women and little girls all in their best dresses. As Eric, he might have noticed a few of the prettier ones. Now, she was almost overwhelmed.

“Wow, it’s busy.” Erika commented.

“To Catholics it’s a sin to miss Christmas mass.” Her grandmother huddled deeper into her coat.

“Erika, Tricia, and Samantha? “Julian greeted. “that is one Christmas gift to cross off my list.” He smiled. “and your parents? Fantastic.”

“hi Julian. This is my Grandmother.” Erika introduced.

“Hey, I saw your billboard.” Julian smiled. “Looking good.”

Erika could feel her face flush. “I didn’t know they were going to put it on a billboard. Especially right outside of school.”

“I didn’t know you were modeling.” Julian smiled. “You look amazing. People at school are talking.”

“I can only guess what about.” She rolled her eyes.

Samantha chuckled. “Some of the girls are extremely jealous.”

“I’m sure some of the guys are too.” Tricia added. “After all I am now dating a model.”

Julian joined the laughing. “Well, Merry Christmas to you all. Get inside to the warmth. It’s starting to get packed in there.”

Julian was right. Erika almost felt like she was late to the party. Her family found some seats. The church choir was singing, filling the church with beautiful music.

Erika nudged Tricia. “There are the Wilson twins.” Erika pointed out. She waved at Annie who nudged Allie. Both waved back. Thankfully there wasn’t a big area of openness around them tonight.

“The twins from Adams?” Tricia asked. “Isn’t there a rumor that one of them is Trans?”

Erika nodded.

More and more people filed into the church. Soon it was standing room only. People even began standing against the walls along the sides.

The choir changed songs and a hush fell over room as everyone stood. A procession of candle bearers and altar boys filed in. Julian came in holding a Bible high over his head.

Erika was only a little less shocked than Samantha

The evening was filled with prayer, song and praise. Tricia held her hand through most of the service and even nestled against her shoulder during part.

Julian’s face was one of peace and absolute joy as he helped Father Daniel in various tasks as the service progressed.

----

“That was a beautiful service.” Her grandmother smiled as they exited the church. “It seems like you have found a nice church.”

“Well, we have only been a handful of times.” Erika admitted.

“You have friends here already.” Her grandmother remarked.

“Erika.” Father David greeted. “I’m glad you came to celebrate with us.

“Uh, thank you Father.” She almost stammered. He remembered her name. This is my Grandmother visiting for the holidays.” She introduced.

“So glad you could celebrate with us.” He took her hand.

“These are my parents. You have met Samantha, and this is my girlfriend, Tricia.”

Father David greeted them in turn. “You have a very special daughter here.” He stated. “Julian has nothing but high praise for her and that means something coming from him.”

“We think she is special.” Her father agreed.

“I’ve never really been fond of church.” Tricia admitted, “But this wasn’t too bad. This is where you’ve been spending your Sunday mornings?”

Erika nodded. “Samantha has started joining me. Perhaps you will too.”

“I’ll have to think about it. I like my sleep-in days.”

“Erika.” Allie greeted with Annie at her side. “You didn’t’ tell us you were a model.”

Erika wanted to groan.

“We love your billboard.” Annie added. “They put one up near our school.”

“I even saw your ad on a taxi yesterday.” Allie stated.

“Thank you.” Erika blushed. “I didn’t expect the ad campaign to be so wide spread.

“We think it is fantastic.”

“Thanks again.”

“Merry Christmas, Erika.” Annie guided her twin off to rejoin her family.

“They seem like nice girls.” Her Grandmother smiled as Erika and her friends slid into the car. “Are they friends from your school too?”

“No.” They go to the other High school.”

“Twins?” her grandmother asked.

Erika nodded. “And on the cheerleading squad.”

“There is a rumor that one of them is like Erika.” Tricia added.

“Oh?” her Grandmother raised an eyebrow. “I couldn’t tell.”

“Annie was shot by a homophobe last month.” Erika explained. “That’s when it became known.”

“Shot?” That is horrible. I hope she is okay.”

“According to her sister it was touch and go for a while, but yes, everything seems to be okay.”

----

“You girls need to come inside and have some cake.” Her father instructed as he parked the car.

“I can’t stay long.” Tricia nodded. “but cake sounds great.”

“It’s our family’s oatmeal cake.” Erika’s eyes flashed with excitement.

“Oatmeal?” Tricia wondered.

“Wait until you try it. It is amazing.”

The family and friends shed their coats once in the warm condo. Erika’s mother was already cutting pieces of the scrumptious cake.

“Merry Christmas.” Samantha grinned pulling a package out of her purse and handing it to Erika.”

“I got you something too.” Tricia went back to her coat and pulled out a package.

“Hold on.” Erika ran to the small Christmas tree and pulled out two identical packages and handed them to her best friends.

The gift from Samantha contained two pairs of fuzzy socks and a gift certificate for a pedicure.

Tricia’s small package contained a pretty heart pendent and matching earring. Erika squealed and had Tricia help her put the necklace on.

The feeling of Tricia’s lips caressing the back of her neck sent charges of excitement up and down her spine.

“Merry Christmas, I hope you like it.” Tricia smiled at Erika.

Erika pulled her girlfriend in for a long lip lock. “I love it.” She looked into Tricia’s eyes as they parted.

Both friends were excited to receive the framed pictures of them with Santa.

“Wow, this cake is fantastic.” Tricia said with her mouth full.

“It’s one of my favorite things about Christmas eve.” Erika admitted. “It’s a great dessert and breakfast.”

“I need to get home.” Tricia announced. “Samantha, are you ready?”

“Yes.”

“Thank you, Mr., and Mrs. Martin for allowing me to join you tonight.” She stated. “It was great meeting you.” She bid farewell to Erika’s grandmother.

“Did you have a good evening?” Erika’s dad asked after her friends had left.

“Yes. It was wonderful.” Erika collapsed on the sofa.

“You’re not done yet.” Her mother stated.

“Huh?”

Her mother pulled a gift from under the tree and handed it to her. This was different. Normally her family’s tradition was to open gifts Christmas morning.

Erika ripped through the wrapping paper, opened the box and pulled out a pair of pajamas.

Light blue and covered with yellow duckys.

Erika giggled. They were adorable.

“I was hoping you’d like them.” Her mother smiled. “They made me laugh.”

“They are perfect.” Erika stifled a yawn. “I need to get to bed anyway. I’ll go put them on.”

Erika was stunned when reaching room. Her clock read two o’clock in the morning. No wonder she was yawning.

Erika stripped out of her clothes, slipped into her new, soft Pjs and got ready for bed, cleaning her face, pulling out bobby pins and brushing out her hair. She was so tired, she almost forgot to go back out and show off her new sleepwear.

“Oh good, they fit.” Her mother clapped her hands.

“Sorry.” Erika yawned again. “I need to get to bed.” She gave kisses all around and stumbled into bed.

The smell of bacon and coffee brought Erika out of her slumber. She stretched in bed and took a minute or two to be able to open her eyes.

Christmas! It was Christmas morning and she had slept in! She couldn’t remember the last time she slept in on Christmas morning. Perhaps it was how late Christmas Eve Mass ran and then cake and gifts. Two o’clock was late even for a teenager to be staying up.

Erika smiled as she fingered the pendent at her throat and wriggled her toes in the fuzzy socks. She definitely had made good friends.

After using the bathroom, Erika padded out to the kitchen to see her mother and grandmother sipping on coffee at the table as her father was like a whirlwind in the kitchen making breakfast.

“Coffee.” Erika croaked.

“Have a seat, honey, I’ll bring it to you.” Her father spun to the coffee maker. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas.” She greeted back and then to her mother and grandmother.

The coffee had its desired effect as it warmed her and woke her brain up, just in time for her father to place a plate of breakfast in front of her. French toast, bacon, eggs just the way she liked them, and a slice of oatmeal cake.

“It looks and smells amazing.” She inhaled the aroma before tucking in. The oatmeal cake was the first to disappear.

Once she had her fill and groaned with delight, she gathered up all of the dishes on the table and quickly rinsed them before depositing them into the dishwasher.

“Can we finally open gifts?” her father whined.

“Please?” Erika joined.

“Fine.” Her mother tried not to smile.

The family settled in the living room while Erika started divvying up the packages and gift bags. She was a little disappointed with how few she seemed to have, but her parents had just bought her a new wardrobe what could she expect?”

Patience was definitely a virtue that Erika struggled with. She tried so hard to wait for the others to open their gifts before she opened hers.

The first few gifts were clothes. Expected, they were wonderful. Her mother must have really nailed down her style. Of course, the day of shopping for a new wardrobe had to have helped with that.

“It isn’t much, but this is from me.” Her grandmother handed her an envelope.

Erika opened it and pulled out a beautiful card about having a granddaughter. Inside she found a Visa gift card.

“Thank you, Grandma.” Erika wiped away wetness from her eyes as she finished reading the card. She threw her arms around her Grandmother and enveloped her in a big hug.

“This is from me.” Her father handed her a card as well.

Feeling very curious, Erika opened it to find a funny card and a note.

“Seriously?” Erika looked to her father.

“You still need clothes and stuff.” He shrugged.

“Thank you, Daddy.” She gave him a hug as well.

“Then there is the one from me.” Her mother sighed.

“Really?”

Her mother nodded. She pointed to a small box sitting on window sill.

Erika retrieved it and wondered why her mom and dad were exchanging strange looks.

She opened it up and found pill bottles. She looked questioningly at her mother.

“You can start them when you wish.” Her mother stated.

Erika’s face was still blank.

“HRT meds.” Her mother forced a smile.

“What?” Erika screamed. “For reals?”

Her mother nodded. “I spoke to your therapist and your Endocrinologist.”

Erika felt light headed. She forced herself to take a few deep breaths. She became very aware of her vision, hoping that it wasn’t graying around the edges. Nope. Just excitement.

She sat down hard and looked from the box to her mother and back to the box.

“Seriously?” She questioned again.

Her mother nodded.

Erika woke up with a smile. She bounded over to her bathroom sink and happily took the HRT that her mother okayed and filled for her. She never thought that her mother would be okay with her transitioning. Even a month ago it would have been unbelievable.

Erika smiled at herself in the mirror and unzipped her new ducky pajamas and stared at her breast forms. Hopefully in a few months she wouldn’t need them anymore. The thought excited her.

It was Tricia day. She and her girlfriend hadn’t spent much time together since Tricia started Diving practice. It seemed like every moment of every day outside of school was devoted to her leaping off the tall platform, spinning, twisting and summersaulting through the air. Today however, she had Tricia all to herself.

She hopped into a long hot shower and made sure to shave just about every inch of her skin. She spent extra time on her makeup and hair and picked out what she hoped would be a sexy but comfortable outfit. She didn’t know what Tricia was planning, it could be anything from shopping and a movie to just cuddling at home. Personally, she was hoping for the later.

“Good morning.” Her father greeted sipping his coffee.

“Morning, Daddy.”

“I got a detailed email about your photoshoot tomorrow.” He handed her a sheet of paper. “It is going to be a very long day. Six o’clock start time.”

“Ugh.” Erika poured herself a mug of the steaming, dark liquid. She poured in some milk and added a bit of sugar before taking a sip.

“Did you find out anything about the spa?” He raised an eyebrow.

Erika shook her head. “I’ve been distracted at school the last few days before Christmas.”

“It says here that they don’t plan to wrap up your photo shoot until close to nine at night.”

“Seriously?” Erika set down her coffee and began reading the email. “What could they possibly be shooting that would take that long?”

“I guess we will find out tomorrow. I suggest you don’t stay out late with Tricia.”

Erika glanced at the clock on the stove. “She should be here anytime.”

“She is driving now?” her mother asked joining them.

“Leeza is in town for Christmas.” Erika explained. “She is driving.”

“That is nice of her.”

The security gate buzzed letting them know that someone was there to see them.
“We are here.” Tricia’s voice came over the speaker.

Erika’s mother pressed the button to allow them in.

“Have a good day, and remember, you’re going to have a very long day tomorrow.” Her father kissed her cheek.

Erika slipped her coat on and headed out to meet her friends.

“I heard that you are starting HRT.” Leeza greeted as Erika slid into the back seat beside Tricia.

“Yes.” Erika beamed.

“You have been warned about the side effects?”

“I’ll talk to my shrink about them next visit.” Erika brushed the thought away and kissed Tricia good morning.

“Be sure you do.” Leeza insisted. “It’ll be an emotional rollercoaster for a bit. But some of the other changes are incredible.”

“Where are we off to?” Erika asked Tricia.

“I was hoping we could just hang at my place.” Tricia bit her lower lip. “It’ll be nice to relax for a day or two. That is if you don’t mind.”

“I was hoping you would suggest that.” Erika took Tricia’s hand and kissed the back of it as she caressed her fingers. “I have an early start tomorrow and a super long day. I’m supposed to report by six and wrap up around nine at night.”

“Whoa, that is a long day.” Tricia agreed.

“I was hoping to drive by the school and check out your billboard.” Leeza posed.

“It’s kind of embarrassing.” Erika stated. “I didn’t’ know they were going to put up billboards and right outside of school no less.”

“She is beautiful.” Tricia grinned “I like it.” She gave Erika a big smile.

“Is that i?” Leeza asked as they approached the school.

“Oh no.” Tricia’s voice fell.

Erika looked up to the twenty-foot picture of herself and saw ‘FRAUD’ painted across her face in red spray paint. Her heart sunk as the feeling of impending doom overshadowed her thoughts.

“Who would do such a thing?” Leeza voiced.

“Taylor?” Tricia muttered the question to Erika who shrugged.

“It could be worse.” Erika sighed. “It could read Tranny, or he/she.”

I’m sure that the billboard company will be replacing it soon.” Leeza assured as they continued down the road.

A bus pulled up next to their car as they sat at a red light.

“Look!” Tricia exclaimed bouncing in her seat and pointing out the window.

Erika looked to see a large advertisement with her face plastered across the side of the bus and turned three shades of red. Part of her was embarrassed by the ad, but a part of her was quite proud.

“That is so cool.” Leeza joined her little sister’s enthusiasm.

The girls pulled into the grocery store parking lot and entered the store. Twenty minutes later they were loading bags of snacks and goodies into the trunk before heading back to Tricia’s house.

“Leeza?” Erika inquired. “Would it be possible for you to drive by my old house? I haven’t seen it since the night of the fire. My parents have been keeping me away from it.”

“Sure, hon.”

Erika stepped out of the car and walked up the driveway to where her house once stood. “It’s gone.” She stated in disbelief. “They didn’t tell me that they were demolishing it.” She took Tricia’s proffered hand.

The driveway was all that remained of the old house. Bare earth with excavator track marks were all that had remained. Even the rope course and front landscaping was gone. It’s like someone erased it off the Earth as if it was an error on a math test.

“Are they getting to rebuild it?” Leeza asked from the car.

“They haven’t said anything to me.” Erika felt off kilter, as if in some surreal world. “The last I heard, they were still debating whether to rebuild or sell.”

“I guess this makes it one step closer to either one.” Leeza stated.

“I’m sorry, Erika.” Tricia squeezed her hand. “I didn’t know. I haven’t been by since the night of the fire.”

Erika took a deep breath and suppressed the tears blurring her vision. “Let’s go.” She turned back to the car. “There is nothing here for me now.”

The girls unloaded the bags of groceries into the kitchen then Leeza shooed them out.

“You two go start your movie and relax, I’ll take care of these.” Leeza was nearly pushing them up the stairs. “I’ll bring up some snacks in a few minutes.”

Tricia took Erika’s hand and led her into the T.V. room. Still holding Erika’s hand, she picked up a remote and pushed a few buttons. Music for the movie came on almost uncomfortably loud.

“What movie did you put in?” Erika yelled over the soundtrack.

Tricia shrugged and pulled Erika into her bedroom. Once inside, Tricia’s mouth found Erika’s. Erika forgot about the movie and reciprocated. The smell of Lavender filled her nose. It had been too long since she and Tricia had had some alone time. Her blood heated by Tricia’s touch, she couldn’t control herself. Erika’s fingers grabbed a handful of Tricia’s hair at her nape and pulled back her head so that her lips could feather across her girlfriend’s neck causing Tricia to gasp with delight.

“It’s been too long.” Erika’s voice just loud enough to be heard over the movie.

Tricia couldn’t utter a word, just a moan as Erika forced her back onto her bed, her lips once again finding Tricia’s.

“Who are you?” Tricia inquired gleefully between kisses.

“Someone who misses you too much.” Erika unbuttoned Tricia’s blouse and unhooked her front latch bra.

Erika’s tongue kept Tricia quiet as her fingers cupped and then caressed Tricia’s silky breasts. Her girlfriends’ nipples ripened like tiny grapes in Erika’s fingers. Her pelvis arched as she shuddered.

Erika’s hand slid down to Tricia’s jeans and unfastened them. Her fingers slid under her panties and found Tricia quite wet between her thighs. Again and again, Tricia’s pelvis arched as Erika repeatedly brought her to climax.

“What was that?” Tricia tried to catch her breath.

“I think they call it make up sex.” Erika grinned. She caressed Tricia’s cheek and lay next to her, laying her head on her chest.

Erika awoke to repeated knocking on the door. She jumped off of Tricia and smoothed her skirt down over her leggings as Tricia quickly pulled on her blouse without a bra and buttoned it up. Just as she was finishing the last button a much louder knock sounded at her door.

Tricia threw Erika a malicious smile with a sparkle in her eye. “This isn’t over.” Her eyes strayed to the door. “Yes?”

Leeza poked her head in and gave them both a knowing smile, “The ‘rents’ are home.” Leeza cautioned. “And half of your movie is over.”

“We’ll be right out.” Tricia had a hard time not smiling.

“You’ll need to wash your face.” Tricia smiled at Erika. “you’ve got lip gloss smeared all over it.”

Exiting the bathroom, Erika found Leeza sprawled on the loveseat, while Tricia sat on the couch and patted the place next to her.

“I brought your beverages up, but they got warm while you were ‘napping’.” Leeza stated. “and I’m afraid the popcorn is a bit cold now. Sorry.”

Erika took a seat next to Tricia who pulled her back to lay between her legs and lay her dark hair against the diver’s chest. “No problem sis.” Tricia let out a wistful sigh.

At least use the blanket.” Leeza tossed them a throw. Which Erika spread out over the two of them. “What movie are we watching anyway?” Erika asked.

“I think we need to start it over regardless.” Tricia picked up the remote with one hand while the other slid under the blanket to rest under Erika’s breasts and held her close.

--o0o—

“Thank you, both.” Erika waved to her two friends as they drove off. She was feeling such a high that she could have floated to the front door.

“I’m home.” She called out.

“How was your day?” Her grandmother inquired.

“Exactly what I needed.” Erika took off her coat and shoes and entered the main living area. A day of doing nothing but vegging.”

“I hope you got it out of your system, because you’ve got a busy day tomorrow.” Her father reminded her.

A cast of despair washed over her as she was reminded of the billboard. “Daddy, someone spray-painted ‘FRAUD’ over my face on the billboard.” She explained.

“I heard.” Her father nodded. “I got a call that they are replacing it tomorrow.”

“Who would do such a thing?” her mother’s voice was full of disdain.

“Someone jealous.” Her grandmother nodded with finality.

Erika shrugged. “Someone hurtful.” She muttered. “I’m going to bed. See you in the morning.”

“Set your alarm.” Her father reminded as she closed the door to her room.

The morning may have started off with a disappointment, but the rest of the day was as she had explained, ‘exactly what she needed’.

Erika was very thankful for the triple shot expresso which she sipped while her father drove her to her new job.

It was still dark out but the eastern horizon was beginning to silver. Her father covered a large yawn with his hand.

“Thank you for driving me this morning, Daddy.”

Her father nodded and took a sip of his own coffee as they pulled into a parking lot.

“There it is.” Erika pointed to the sign. Serenity Salon and spa.

The beauty spa was relatively new to Constitution, only a few people she knew had heard of it, but a Google search had brought up some good reviews.

Her dad parked next to several cars near the entrance. A sign on the front door read closed for a private event.

The door opened, just as her father reached for it.

“You must be the Martins.” A middle-aged woman greeted. “I’m Jessie, the owner of Serenity. Please come in.”

Erika walked into a small, posh waiting area. A limestone wall framed by potted plants. The scent of lavender and vanilla was soothing.
Jessie led them through frosted glass double doors and into a large waiting room with over stuffed sage green chairs and lounges. Vases of flowers stood on small side tables. A few Chairs framed a limestone gas fireplace on one wall.

“Please have a seat.” She invited. “I’d offer coffee, but I see you have some. I have bagels, fruit and pastries?”

“I’m good, thank you.” Erika smiled.
Jessie took a seat across from them. “I saw your billboard, you look fantastic. When Joe talked to me and showed me pictures of that shoot, I knew you’d I perfect for our ad campaign.”

“Thank you.” Erika grinned. “What is your ad campaign? “

“We’d like you to be our model for the upcoming Prom season.” Jessie smiled. “we would like to do before and after photos of you for our brochures and ads. We Plan to give you a makeover which is why this will be an all-day shoot.”

“that sounds like fun, but I really don’t want to cut my hair.” Erika was a bit apprehensive.

Jessie smiled. “We were actually planning on giving you hair extensions, which you will of course be able to keep and we will remove them when you are done with them.”

“Really?” Erika bounced forward in her seat. How long do they last?”

“With proper care, three months.” Jessie smiled at Erika’s enthusiasm. “We will also be giving you a bit of a spa treatment today, but a lot of it will be while Joe is shooting you. So mixing work with pleasure.”

“Sounds fantastic.” Erika agreed.

“We have a robe for you to change into through these doors.” Jessie directed her to small room.

Erika entered a small private changing area that held a bank of lockers. She shrugged out of her clothes except her bra and panties. A warm, plush robe awaited her on a warmer. Erika sighed with delight as she wrapped up in its softness. Matching slippers enveloped her feet in sheer luxury.

As she emerged, Jessie led her into what looked to be a hair salon. On the far side, two women waited for her with smiles.

“These two will be doing your makeup and hair.” Jessie explained. “First we are going to do a light everyday look. Nothing fancy for the before pictures.”

Erika greeted the two women and sat in a chair as one set her hair on large hot rollers, while the other began her makeup.

“Good morning, Erika.” Joe strode in. “It’s good to be working with you again. I’m set up in the very front room for you.” He looked to the makeup artist. “How much longer?”

“Fifteen minutes?” She confirmed with a look from the woman doing Erika’s hair.

“Wardrobe?” Joe asked Jessie as she emerged from another room.

“I set up the racks in the quiet room.” She indicated the room that had the soft chairs and fireplace. “Slacks, and blouse to begin?”

Joe nodded.

Twenty minutes later, Erika stood in the front room wearing an ivory, button down blouse, charcoal gray slacks, and flats with a small heel.

“Great.” Joe told her as the lights flashed. “look over your shoulder, good, now look at me like you are about to go in to take your geometry test. Fantastic.”

Erika moved and posed for what seemed like hours. She was surprised when she looked at the clock and only thirty minutes had passed.

“Go robe up.” Joe directed.

The next two hours were spent sitting in a pedicure chair, reading a book next to the fireplace, eating finger sandwiches on a covered terrace and getting a facial.

“Okay, Erika. We’ll need you to slip out of your bra and lay face down on the massage table.”

“What?” Erika balked. “I, uh, I can’t take off my bra.”

“Sure you can. We’ll keep you covered. We just need to shoot you getting a massage.”

Erika’s heart was pounding. “I can’t.” She protested.

“I’ve seen thousands of women topless.” Joe assured her. “You don’t have anything I haven’t seen before.”

Erika shook her head. “No, Joe. I can’t.”

Joe’s face was turning red. He tossed his camera for his assistant to catch, grabbed Erika by the arm and led her off to a corner. “What is your problem?” he demanded in hushed tones.

Erika’s heart felt like it was going to pound its way through her chest. “I don’t have breasts, yet.” She squeaked. “I wear breast forms.” She swallowed hard as she looked up at Joe, her face becoming as red as his.

Joe’s eyes flicked from her face to the cleavage showing above her robe and then back at her. “those aren’t real?”

Erika looked away, tears filling her eyes. “No.”

“Hey.” His tone changed. His voice became soft. “There are plenty of models out there who aren’t blessed with breasts.” He stated. “Like I said, I’ve seen thousands, of every size shape and color. We’ll keep you covered until you are in position and then we’ll begin shooting. No one will know except one or two people.” He lifted her chin to look him in the eye. “It’s nothing to be ashamed about. You are a beautiful young woman breasts or no. okay?”

Erika took a deep breath. “Okay.”

True to his word, Joe made sure that Erika was covered the whole time as she lay face down on the massage table.

“Erika, this is Marco. He’ll be doing your massage.”

“A real massage? Not just posing?” Erika inquired. She had never had a massage before.

Jessie nodded. “It’ll be short, but yes. We have to get you back in the salon to start on your extensions.”

Marco’s strong hands lightly worked Erika’s muscles, tense from anxiety and stress of being found out. It wasn’t as relaxing as she would have liked, with Joe buzzing around taking photos of her from all different angles.

Back in her robe, Erika was led to the quiet room. Her dad sat next to the fireplace working on his tablet. He looked up and smiled. “How is it going?”

“Okay.” She shrugged.

“There is a buffet over here.” Jessie called from the opposite side of the room. “You should eat while you can.”

Erika was in the middle of loading up a plate when Joe walked into the room with a man a little older than her dad and wearing a very nice, expensive looking suit. A young man in his twenties, also wearing an expensive looking suit followed behind tapping at a tablet.

“Erika, Mr. Martin.” Joe got their attention. “I’d like you to meet Hal Winters.”

Erika’s dad stood and shook Mr. Winter’s hand. “John.”

“Hal.” Mr. Winters returned.

“Hal is an agent from Los Angeles.” Joe introduced. “I sent him some pictures of your last shoot and he was flying through the area and stopped by to meet you.” He smiled at Erika.

“Hello Erika.” Hal greeted. “Please, come have a seat next to your dad.”

“I’ve got to get set up for the next part.” Joe excused himself.

Erika took her plate and a bottle of water and joined her father. Mr. Winters took a seat across from him. The young man stood off to the side.

“Erika,” Mr. Winters greeted. “I understand that this is only your second modeling job?”

“Yes, Sir.” Erika put her plate down on the side table.

“You have done something that doesn’t happen very often.” He continued. “You’ve impressed Joe.” He grinned. “Joe sent me photos of your first shoot and has just shown me some very promising photos from this one.”

“Thank you.” Erika blushed.

Mr. Winters looked from Erika to her father. “I am an agent based in L.A. I work with bands, actors, actresses, models, and singers.” He handed her father a business card and then one to her. “Some of the names you might recognize are Michelle Gray and Tommy Kincaid.” He dropped.

Erika was stunned. This was Michelle Gray and Tommy Kincaid’s agent and he was sitting here in Constitution talking to her? Her heart skipped two beats and then pounded in her chest.

“Devon.” He turned to the younger man. “Some water, please.”

The Young man nodded and swiftly, but elegantly strode across the room and brought a cold-water bottle back to his boss. Mr. Winters took a good swallow and looked back at her and her father.

“I am considering offering my services to you.” He stated. “I could get you on national ads and even commercials depending upon if you can act.” He looked at Erika. “Have you been in any local productions or perhaps sing?”

Erika couldn’t utter a sound. She just shook her head.

“Perhaps in time. Let’s see how you do with print ads first.” He smiled. He looked up at Jessie who had just entered then back at Erika. “Ms. Martin, you are wanted. It was a pleasure meeting you.” He stood as she got up, shaking her hand. “I hope to see you again very soon.”

Erika took her plate and followed Jessie into the salon as Hal Winters, Michelle and Tommy Kincaid’s agent sat down to talk to her dad about her.

She absently age what was on her plate, not tasting a thing. Her stunned mind was still making sense of Mr. Winters wanting to be her agent.

Four women buzzed around her. Two were parting off tiny sections of her hair and using an interesting tool, bonded long lengths of hair to her own. The other two were their assistants.

“Usually it takes closes to six hours to put in extensions.” Jessie had explained. “But with two stylists and two assistants, It should be a lot quicker.

Erika took out her smart phone and turned it on. Several text messages and emails were awaiting her.

Samantha: So excited for you today. Let me know how it’s going.

Tricia: Just checking in, Love. How are you doing?
Tricia: What time are you done tonight? Would love to spend more quality time with you.

Victoria: Hey Girl! Love the Billboard. Everyone is talking about it. So many are so jealous. Hope you’re having a great Holiday.

Tricia: Drove by the school. They are replacing your billboard.

Allie: Hello Erika. Annie and I loved seeing you at Mass. Sorry to see someone defaced your billboard. Hope you are having a good Christmas.

Mom: How are you doing? Your Grandmother is so excited about your modeling. We are hoping you are having a fantastic day.

Tricia: Text me when you can. I miss you.

Erika answered the texts and opened her email.

Hey Erika,
What the hell is going on there? Has everyone lost their minds? Krystal Told me that you were freaking model now. WTF?
You didn’t even like the idea of being a girl at camp and you’re now a model? I must be losing my mind.
Dad’s on a business trip this Christmas as usual. He promised to take me to St. Thomas when he gets back, but I’m not counting on it. If he does it’ll probably be either a business trip or a vacation with a girlfriend.
Hope you are having a better Christmas than I am.
Rachel.

Merry Christmas Erika.
Haven’t heard from you in a while. I heard that the brain operation went well.
Victoria sent me a picture of your face on a billboard. How did that happen?
Would love to hear from you,
Danni.

Erika looked up to see her dad approach. He dragged a stool over to her.

“How are you doing?” he asked.

“Was that seriously a Hollywood agent, Dad?”

Her father nodded. Yes. Hal Winters. He seems to be a pretty big deal in Hollywood. He likes the photos that you are doing. He wants to see how this one turns out. If it is as good as the insurance campaign, he’ll offer you a contract.”

“Holy Shit.” Erika gasped.

“Hey, watch your language.” Her dad admonished, “But yea, holy shit.”

Erika bit her lip. “Does he know about. . . . you know?”

Her father shook his head. “Not yet, but I suspect that is something that he’ll need to know soon.”

“Tricia text and said that they are replacing the defaced billboard.”

Her father nodded. “Good.”

“Have you told mom yet?” she inquired.

“Just about to call her now. How are you holding up?” he leaned over to watch as the women installed the extensions.

“Fine. It’s kind of weird seeing this.” Erika pulled long strands of curly dark hair across her chest.

“It’s looking good.” He smiled. “I’m going to call you mom.”

“Thanks, Daddy.”

Erika looked at her reflection in the mirror in awe. This morning, her dark hair barely brushed past the top of her shoulders, now voluminous curls fell nearly to her belly. “That is amazing. Thank you.” She smiled at the women who had just spent two hours working on her hair.

The makeup artist then stepped in. “You ready for the next step?” she asked.

“Can I use the Ladies room first?”

“Right over there.” She pointed.

Erika had to pull the long tresses over her shoulder for fear of them resting on the porcelain.

This day was almost unbelievable. With instant long hair, bits of spa treatments, Hal Winters wanting to sign her… It was just unbelievable.

Erika washed her hands and sat back down for her makeup.

“This will be a light everyday look as well.” Jessie stated. “You’ll then pose while getting a manicure and pedicure and then we’ll do the final look.”

“Okay.” Erika nodded.

“How are you doing? Can I get you something?” Jessie asked.

“A drink please?” Erika closed her eyes as the artist began applying a base to her face.

An hour and a half later, Erika’s fingers felt relaxed and pretty. A new set of gel nails painted a light pink with tiny metal flecks kept catching her eye as they sparkled in the light. Her feet felt tingly and fantastic, the slippers feeling even softer on her feet.

“Okay let’s break for dinner.” Joe and Jessie agreed.

Erika grabbed a salad and tucked into it as her father worked on his laptop and was on the phone.

“Joe says that he is getting some first-rate photos of you.” Jessie startled Erika as she came up from behind. “We are very excited that you’re doing this for us. Just a few more hours and we’ll be done.”

Erika found herself back in the makeup chair. This time getting a heavier application. As the makeup woman worked on her face, a stylist was curling and styling her hair.

When finished the women refused to allow Erika a glimpse in the mirror, both smiling manically. Erika was then directed to a whole rack of red dresses.

“Blue looks better on me.” Erika informed Jessie and Joe.

“I know it does.” Joe stated, but for sake of these being prom pictures, red is the color that will pop.”

It took trying on a dozen dresses before Joe and Jessie were satisfied.

“Here dear. Put these on.” Jessie handed Erika some simple, but flashy earrings. She stood back and grinned like a proud mother. “Stunning.”

“Can I look now?” Erika asked.

“Yes, of course.”

Erika was speechless as she gazed at the beautiful woman in the mirror. Was that really her? The right side of her ebony hair had been pulled back and clipped just behind the ear with a silver rhinestone hair comb. The curls with the added length of the extensions cascaded over her left shoulder covering her breast. A red beaded dress with a halter neck showed off slim smooth shoulders and tapered in to her waist. The skirt flared, just slightly and cascaded down to her rhinestone strappy sandals that peaked out of a slit that ran up to just past her knee.

“No, no. You can’t cry.” Jessie ran forward with a tissue and dabbed at her eyes. “What do you think?”

Erika just shook her head in wonder. She had always thought that Samantha was the most beautiful girl that she had ever known. This young woman looking back at her now would definitely give her a run for that title.

Erika’s eyes darted from the image of her to that of her father entering the room. Tears flowed freely from his eyes as he gazed with pride upon her. “You look….. you look….. I have no words. Beautiful doesn’t come close to describing how stunning you look.”

“Thank you, Daddy.”

“Okay, we need to touch up your makeup and get your last shoot done.” Jessie physically directed Erika into the other room.

Joe had her posing in the front room again for close to an hour before calling a halt. “Okay, only a few more.” He told Erika.

Jessie and all of the people who worked on Erika throughout the day came in, all dressed nicely. “Group photo.” Jessie smiled at Erika. Erika felt like a movie star as they all gathered around her and posed for a few pictures.

“Only one more quick shoot to go.” Jessie promised Erika. She led her back into the quiet room. “We have to get pictures with a prom date.”

The furniture by the fireplace had all moved to the opposite side of the room. Her father was by the fireplace talking to a young man in a tux with his back to her. With broad shoulders the young man definitely filled a tux nicely.

Her father’s eyes flicked up to hers, they smiled with mirth and he smiled. The young man turned towards her.

“Jake?”

Authors note: I'd like to thank Melanie Brown for permission to use and mention her characters.

“Hel-“ Jake’s jaw dropped open as he just stared at her.

“Oh good, you two know one another.” Jessie smiled.

“Yes.” Erika didn’t take her eyes off of the star running back of her school. “Jake and I have a class together.” His jaw was still hanging open in disbelief which made her a little self-conscious, but part of her was thrilled at the reaction. He did fill out the tux very well indeed.

Jake suddenly became aware of his surroundings as Joe was snapping pictures. “Whoa.” He managed. “You look…. Damn girl, you look amazing.”

Flattered, Erika felt her face flush. “You look pretty good too.” She grinned.

“Okay you two. You seem to like one another, so this will be easier. You are going to come together as if meeting before going to your prom. “Joe instructed. Mr. Martin, stand off to the side, but I’ll need you in a moment.

Erika and Jake stood opposite from one another in front of the fireplace just staring at one another.
Erika saw Jake’s eyes scanning from her eyes down to the ground and back to her eyes.

“Okay give her the corsage.” Joe instructed as his camera went to work.

The two stepped up to one another. Jake held out a small plastic box holding a white flower. Jessie stepped up but remained out of the photos. Jake handed her the box.

His eyes finally left Erika and looked down at the corsage. “It’s a wrist one.” He looked back up at Erika with relief.

“Slowly now.” Joe instructed.

Erika held out her wrist as Jake slid the gardenia on to her forearm.

“Would you two be okay with a kiss or two?” Joe asked.

Erika bit her lip as Jake began to chuckle, which caused Erika to giggle.

“Eggsnog.” They both said at once.

Erika turned to Joe still giggling. “Yes. I think it’ll be okay.”

Jake stepped forward and placed his hands on her hips and leaned in. Erika closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, her heart began to beat a bit faster as her nose filled with his musk. His lips touched hers causing bursts of energy to run through her body. Her toes literally began to curl, in an effort to keep them from curling too much, she lifted her heel.
“Perfect.” Joe sounded excited, “Hold that.”

The instructions eroded some of the romance out of the feeling, but only until his lips parted and sucked on her lower lip which made her gasp as she felt her knee start to buckle. She quickly put down her other foot and grabbed his shoulders tighter to maintain her balance.

“Looking good.” Joe encouraged.

One of Jake’s hands left her waist and moved up to the small of her back. His lips parted and his tongue sought entry. All thoughts of what was happening left her brain as she tasted him.

“Too much.” Joe pulled his camera away. “Too much, you’ve got your faces smashed together. Erika?”

“Erika!” her father’s voice was more firm, snapping her back to what was going on.

She pulled back and bit her lip, Jake’s taste still in her mouth his scent still making her heady.

“Makeup.” Joe called.

Erika stepped back from Jake as the makeup artist came darting in.

“Are you two dating?” She asked as she repaired Erika’s smudged lipstick. “Cuz holy crap girl, you two have got all of the women in here steamed up.”

“Huh uh.” Erika managed. “But we did have a fling at a Christmas party.”

“You two look great together.” She affirmed. She stepped over to Jake and cleaned lipstick off from around his mouth and whispered something to him that Erika couldn’t make out.

“Okay let’s try this again. But you’re going to act like your posing for Prom pictures.” Joe coached. “Jake, stand behind Erika and hold her hips. That’s good, now skooch a smidge to your right. Perfect. Now both of you look at the camera and smile.” Several flashes went off. “Alright, now stay where you are, but Erika lean back into him a touch and both of you look at one another. Good, good.”

“Okay, that is a wrap.” Joe called out. He tossed his camera to his young assistant and stepped forward. He wrapped Erika up in a hug. “That was a long day and you were amazing.”

“Thank you.” Erika was a little put off. Joe was known for being cold and distant and here he was hugging her?

Joe released Erika and shook her dad’s hand. “It was a pleasure.” He nodded.

“Are you two dating?” Jessie inquired of the high school couple.

“No.” Erika gave a nervous laugh.

“Could have fooled, us.” Jessie stated. “We need to get that makeup off of your face and your hair brushed out before we let you leave.” She directed Erika back to the salon room.

Erika turned to look for Jake but he was being directed into a changing room to get out of his tux.

Erika pulled out her phone.

Erika: Of all the people, you had to be my model date? She texted him.
Jake: I was surprised when I met your dad tonight. I was approached yesterday.
Erika: What am I going to tell Tricia?
Jake: Nothing? It was part of the job, it didn’t mean anything.
Erika suddenly felt hurt.
Erika: Didn’t mean anything? You must be an awful good actor,
Jake: I didn’t mean it that way.
Erika: What way did you mean it?
Jake: I meant that. . . . well. . . . I did like it. But I don’t want to get between you and Tricia
Erika: Some ego thinking you are that good.
Part of her had to admit that he was actually an amazing kisser, but seriously.

Erika put the phone down as her head was being pulled as the stylists were brushing out hair spray and pulling out hair pins. Her phone buzzed a couple of times. Then came the makeup remover and a good facial scrub. Her phone buzzed another time or two

“We’re going to shampoo your hair and get the rest of the product out.” The stylist took her to the shampoo bowl. As she shampooed, she instructed Erika on the proper way to care for the extensions.

Suddenly Jake was standing over her while her hair was being conditioned.

“You stopped answering your texts.” He stated. “Listen, I just want to say that I was hired to do a photo shoot for this place. I didn’t know that you were the model that I was shooting with. I like you Erika. I hope that you have seen that in the past few weeks. You are a fantastic kisser and Tricia is very lucky. But if you ever decide to swing the other way, I’ll be here.” He paused and looked down at her worry etched in his face. “I just want to be your friend and I hope that that kiss doesn’t ruin that.” With that he spun on his heels and walked away.

The only think Erika could hear was the water rinsing out her hair.

“He seems like a keeper.” The stylist stated. “Not many men can or will say such heartfelt things.”

Erika’s heart felt like it was imploding. “Yeah, he is a great guy.”

--o0o—

Long hair, Erika decided was as much a burden as it was a blessing. It took an eternity to dry and forever to style. She misted her long dark curls with some light hair spray and began applying her mascara.

“Hurry, we need to get going.” Her mother called.

“Coming.” She finished with a flick of the wand and quickly added a pale shimmering pink gloss to her lips before padding out to where her mother and grandmother were wiggling into their coats.

Erika slid her feet into some boots with a slight heal and pulled a matching leather jacket on over a blue turtleneck sweater.

“I just want to hug you and hold you in my arms for a week.” Her grandmother admitted as she watched Erika flick her long hair out over the lapel of the Jacket.

“You will be coming back soon, won’t you?” She asked.

“Maybe I’ll come back to see you go to Prom.” Her grandmother smiled. “I can’t get over how beautiful you look. Even more beautiful than your mother.”

Erika flushed under the praise.

The three women loaded into the car and drove to the airport.

“Just drop me off here, dear.” Her grandmother directed to a drop off zone.

Erika jumped out of the car as her mother popped the trunk and unloaded her grandmother’s bag.

“Thank you for everything, Grandma.” She hugged the older woman.

“I didn’t do anything.” Her grandmother insisted.

“You talked to mom about me going through with this.” Erika gestured at her body.

“She would have come around eventually.”

“No, Gran, she wouldn’t. Dad was about to leave her. Thank you.”

“You take care and send me pictures of what you and your girlfriends are doing.” Gran gave her another squeeze. “I’ll have my neighbor’s son come and show me how to use that skype thing you were telling me about.”

Erika giggled while tears filled her eyes.

Her Grandmother took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “I love you, don’t your forget it.”

Her grandmother turned away and released her hand, and rolled her bags into the terminal.

Erika sat in the front seat and buckled up. “That was a good visit.” She told her mom.

“Yes, it was.” Her mother agreed as she pulled back out into traffic.

The car felt quieter on the way home and the condo felt emptier. Erika slid out of her coat and boots and went into her room and flopped on her bed.

She had just drifted off to sleep when she heard her mother’s phone go off. In her snoozing state, she heard her mother’s voice getting excited.

Erika rubbed some of the grogginess from her eyes and went in search of the apparent excitement.

“Oh, she’s up.” Her mother said into her phone. “Hold on, I’ll put it on speaker.” She glanced at Erika. “It’s your father.” She pushed a button on her phone. “Okay, you’re on.”

“What’s all this about?” Erika flopped into the sofa near her mother.

“Mr. Winters wants to sign you.” Her dad announced.

It was like someone doused her with a bucket of ice water. All sleepiness was gone. “Seriously?”

“Apparently, Joe sent him some of the photos from the shoot the other day.” Her father’s voice was cracking, he was so excited. “Mr. Winters wants to meet with you to sign a contract asap. He wants to video conference with us tonight.”

“Holy – “

“Watch it young lady.” Her mother admonished.

“Macaroni.” Erika finished

Erika felt like she was in bizarro world. She was going to be signed with a professional modeling agent. She called Tricia, but her girlfriend didn’t pick up the phone so she called Samantha and spilled on the latest. She was so excited, she couldn’t sit still, she was actually bouncing on her bed as she spoke to her friend.

She then emailed Aunt Carrie, Danni, Katie, and Rachel and told them. She was just finishing up the email when Tricia called back.

“Where’ve you been?” Erika asked.

“I was getting my hair done at the salon.” Tricia apologized. “I couldn’t answer.”

Erika told her about her father’s call and the video conference.

“What about our date?” Tricia sounded a little disappointed. “We were supposed to go out tonight for New Years.”

“Oh no, I’m so sorry.” Erika apologized. Maybe if it doesn’t take long, I’ll still be able to come over.”

Tricia sighed. “I’m sorry. I am excited for you. It’s just I was excited to see you tonight too.”

“Ditto.” Erika’s excitement was a bit subdued by her girlfriend’s disappointment. “Still plan on us going out. We’ll just have to get a little later start than planned.”

“Okay.” Tricia didn’t sound convinced. “I hope your conference goes well.”

Erika hung up and started going through her closet. She needed something that would present well for Mr. Winters and then she’d need something sexy and fun for her date with Tricia.

--o0o—

“We have run into a small issue.” Mr. Winters stated after greeting everyone. “We do a back-ground check on all of our talent and have not been able to find any information about Erika Martin.”

Erika’s heart dropped in her chest.

“That is an issue that we have been working on.” Her father nodded. “Erika is currently using a different last name. Erika Summers.”

Mr. Winters nodded and looked over to someone off camera. “I see.” He said. “Is Summers her ‘stage’ name?”

“I haven’t really thought about it.” Erika admitted.

Mr. Winters looked off screen again, his lips tightened. “There’s something you aren’t telling me.” He stated. “As an agent, I need to know about any secrets, or issues so that I can help or correct various things.” He paused. “Erika isn’t part of a witness protection program, is she?”

“No.” her father stated. “The truth is,” he looked at Erika and then back to Mr. Winters, “Erika Summers used to be Eric Martin. She is transgendered and in the process of transitioning.”

“That makes more sense.” Mr. Winters didn’t have any judgment in his voice.

“I began transitioning last summer without my parents knowing.” Erika explained. “To avoid bullying at school, I changed my name to Summers.”

“Did you legally change it?” Mr. Winters cut in.

Both her and her dad shook their head. “It was easier once she was at school to just leave it that way.” Her dad stated. “I figured, once she had graduated, then we could deal with the legal issues.”

“This won’t cause you to cancel our contract, will it?” Erika’s voice cracked.

Mr. Winters shook his head. “I have several talents that are Transgender.” He stated.

“Really?” Erika was surprised.

Mr. Winters nodded. “Of course, I can’t tell you who. Just know that in this industry it isn’t unheard of. Now, are there any other secrets that I need to know about? Drinking? Drug use? Self-mutilation? Domestic violence?”

Erika shook her head as he ticked off different issues.

Mr. Winters looked specifically at Erika. “If there are any of these issues that you find you’d like to talk to me about later, call me.” He directed. “As long as I know about them, no matter how bad they may be, I can get you help.”

“Yes, thank you, Mr. Winters.” Erika nodded understanding.

Hal Winters smiled. “Okay, then. I’ll have Devon draft a contract and send it to you to look over. Can you get away for a few days?” he asked. “I’d like to fly you out here to get some exposure.”

“When?” her mother asked.

“Can you come out next Friday?”

“I’ll be on a business trip.” Her father stated, but Nancy can go with her.”

Her mother nodded agreement.

“Fantastic.” Mr. Winters clasped his hands. “I’ll have Devon make the arrangements and I’ll see you next Friday.”

As soon as they ended the video conference an Erika leaped into the air. “We’re going to Hollywood!” she screamed. “we’re going to Hollywood.” She hugged her mom and then her dad.

The next hour was spent in her room telling her friends. She had almost forgotten about her date with Tricia. She quickly shrugged out of her conservative blouse and jeans and slid into a form fitting royal blue dress that was shorter than her father would have liked, but longer than Tricia would like.

“Mom? Can you take me to Tricia’s? I’m already late because of the video conference.”

“Yes.” Her mother agreed.

Erika skipped into the bathroom and freshened her makeup, adding a bolder look to her blue eyes and touched up her mane of ebony curls before slipping into her stiletto heels and heading to the door.

“Hi.” Leeza greeted. “Tricia’s upstairs.”

“Thanks.” Erika slipped her coat off.

“Wow, don’t you look sexy.” Leeza gave her the once over. “Love the long hair. Are those extensions?”

“Yes.” Erika flushed with pleasure. Compliments from Leeza were always honest and deserved.

“When are, you heading back?” Erika hung her coat on a peg.

“Tomorrow.”

“Will you be hanging out with us tonight?”

“No, I’ll be spending quality time with my parents.” Leeza smiled.

Erika slipped off her heels and padded upstairs to Tricia’s room. She stopped in the doorway and just stared at her girlfriend.

Tricia’s once blonde hair had been shaved around the perimeter. What was left along with the slightly longer top was pastel pink. Even her eyebrows were pink. Thick long false eyelashes accentuated her beautiful eyes, while crystal gems enhanced her strange but sexy makeup.

She wore a pink cashmere sweater that matched her hair and a short, flared, pastel blue skirt.

“What do you think?” She smiled, but seemed a bit uncertain.

“Wow. I like it.” Erika stated. “You becoming a pastel?”

“I kind of always have been. I got a bunch of money for Christmas, so Leeza took me shopping while you were at the spa all day.” Tricia bounced up and touched her lips to Erika’s. “You look edible by the way.”

“I was working, not relaxing.” Erika insisted, “Where are we going?” Erka asked.

“To a New Year’s party, silly.” Tricia sat on her bed and pulled white thigh highs up over beautifully shaped calves. She slipped into some chunky pink shoes which allowed her to look straight into Erika’s eyes.

Erika ran her hand up the back of Tricia’s denuded nape and pulled her lips to hers.

“I think I like this incarnation of Tricia very much.” Erika whispered as they parted.

“The pink won’t stay in my hair with me being in the pool all of the time so I got these.” Tricia pulled out two pink wigs and a pastel blue wig.

Erika giggled.

“What?” Tricia asked.

“We are going to blow people away when we go back to school.

Warning: The characters in this chapter felt that the author was incapable of writing. They have taken over and written most of this chapter themselves. Please do not hold the author responsible for the character’s actions, her muse was held at gun point tied to a train track as a jumbo jet full of acid was about to crash on the tracks being chased by a meteorite threatening to hit the area causing a tsunami. The Author only abided by the characters wishes so that she may maintain her sanity. Any possible deaths in this chapter will be made into a dream sequence so that the author can hopefully salvage the story.

Chapter 19

Erika was happily surprised as Tricia bounded from her door to Samantha’s car. Her girlfriend was really playing up the new pastel look. Her short hair with the shaved sides was still very much a pastel pink. A white over coat hid all but the bottom hem of her midi pink skirt.

“Morning, loves.” She greeted gleefully.

“Wow, liking the new look.” Samantha greeted.

“Thanks.” Trisha smiled. She leaned into the front of the car and gave Erika a peck on the cheek.
‘I feel boring being next to you two.” Samantha shook her blonde head.

The Threesome strolled side by side into the school. Tricia immediately drew a lot of looks and a little attention. There weren’t too many pastel goths at Washington High school.

Many students complimented her on the billboard, while a few threw snide remarks.

“Don’t listen to them.” Samantha squeezed her arm. “They are just jealous.”

“I just wonder who vandalized it.” Erika sighed.

“Do you really think it was Taylor?” Tricia inquired.

Erika shrugged. “She is one of a few people who aren’t happy with my secret.”

“Hey Erika.” Peter greeted. “Really like the posters and stuff. I didn’t know you were modeling.”

“Thank you, that was my first.” Erika smiled.

“She just finished a second.” Tricia bragged.

Pete raised an eyebrow. I can’t wait to see it. Who’s it for?”

“I can’t say.” Erika stepped in as Tricia was about to blab.

Pete nodded in understanding. “How are the episodes?”

“Haven’t had one since the day school let out for Christmas. Catch you later, Pete?” Erika was dragged away by Samantha.

“Hey Stephanie.” Erika greeted as they walked by her locker.

The strange girl’s, optimistic face turned to a glare as they passed.

“Whoa, what’s going on there?” Tricia whispered.

Erika turned around and pulled her arm out of Tricia’s. “What’s wrong, Stephanie?” Erika approached and lowered her voice.

“Your billboard is sickening.” She snarled. “Do they even know?”

Erika stood dumbfounded. She thought that she and Stephanie had worked past the hate and were becoming friends. . . Well not friends, but at least amicable. “What do they need to know?” Erika defended.

“That you are . . . unnatural.” Stephanie nearly spat.

“I thought we were good?” Erika was hurt.

“We were until you had to start broadcasting your sins across town.”

Erika turned white and stood dumbfounded.

“Sins? Really?” Tricia admonished. “After she stuck up for you and even helped you out?”

“She is unclean and I became dirty by associating with her.” Stephanie snarled at Tricia and then actually spat at Erika’s feet.”

Before Erika could even blink, Tricia had slapped Stephanie across the face, the sound brought everyone in the hall to a standstill. If it had been evening, Erika would have sworn she would have heard crickets.

The shock of the slap wore off and Stephanie leapt forward like a jaguar pouncing on prey. Erika jumped back just in time, as Tricia, although smaller, threw Strange Stephanie to the ground, one hand holding on to a handful of hair, the other punching the girl in the face.
“Girls!” a teacher yelled. “Break it up, now! Girls!” The teacher grabbed Tricia and pulled her off of Stephanie, then helped Stephanie up. “To the office, Now!” She had each girl the arm and was marching them both down the hall.”

Samantha and Erika followed. Erika was in shock, why would Tricia do that. She did feel grateful for her girlfriend coming to her rescue, but starting a fight, would only cause the two of them more trouble. All she wanted to do was to find out why Stephanie was so upset and try to soothe things over again.

This was not the Stephanie that they had known before going to Christmas break, what could have happened. It almost sounded like a religious thing. The words ‘unclean’, and ‘unnatural’ hurt her more than being spit upon or even slapped. Was she ‘unnatural’? she had been so determined to be the best girl that she could be, she didn’t really think about it being unnatural since, well since Camp Kumoni.

God, this was such a huge step back after all the leaps she had been taking forward. Most of the school accepted her as Erika Summers. Very few knew that she had once been Eric Martin ‘the plague’. She had made many friends, was doing better in her classes than Eric ever did. She was on the rally squad, at least as far as she knew, where Eric was a loner, outcast.

Crap, what if Stephanie told someone Erika’s true identity. What if she were to tell now? This could be disastrous. Why? Why did Tricia have to start a fight? What was Strange Stephanie’s word against most of the rally squad and her friends?

The teacher spun around. “You two, go to your classes.” She glared at them. “Now.”

Erika and Samantha stopped in their tracks and just watched in disheartened, disbelief as their friend was being marched to punishment.

“Will they suspend or expel her?” Erika’s voice wavered.

“Maybe suspension.” Samantha looked at Erika, her face looked to be just as stunned as she imagined her own to look “She’ll probably get kicked off the Dive team.”

“No.” Erika’s eyes stung as tears began coursing down her cheeks. “They can’t kick her out of Diving. It would kill her.” She cried. “Why would she do such a thing?”

Samantha gathered her in her arms as people started going back to their business. “She loves you.”

--o0o—

Erika and Samantha walked into home room.

“Did you get extensions?” a girl asked as they passed.

“Yes.” Erika answered absent minded.

“Hey there.” Jake smiled up as she approached. “I heard that your body guard broke Strange Stephanie’s nose.”

“It isn’t funny, Jake.” She passed and sat down at her desk.

Jake turned around and watched her for a moment. “I’m sorry.” He stated. “I heard it wasn’t much of a fight. I hope Tricia doesn’t get into too much trouble.”

“You’re a jock.” Erika focused her eyes on Jake. “Do you think they will kick her off the Dive team?”

Jake shrugged his massive shoulders. “I’ve never been in a fight. Well, not off of the field anyway.” He said. “It depends upon who started it, and what happened and if they have any history, I guess.” He leaned in closer. “I’m ashamed to say that some Jocks at this school get a pass when it comes to getting into trouble. I was sick one-day last year but I heard that there was a guy who was duct taped naked to the flagpole by some guys on the football team. The poor guy.” Jake shook his head. “I heard that the jocks involved only got a slap on the hand, while the poor bastard had to move out of state or something.”

“It was horrible.” Samantha quickly agreed.

Erika’s mind was in a whirl. So, Jake wasn’t a party to that, and he genuinely seemed disgusted by the act. She didn’t remember him being there, but he was on the football team so she kind assumed that he might have had a part in it. “Wow that is awful.” Erika agreed. If he hadn’t been sick that day, would he have helped? She wondered.

“Did Tricia start it?” Jake asked.

“She was provoked.” Samantha defended their friend.

Jake shook his head. “Well, I hope for her sake as well as yours that she isn’t punished too harsh.” Jake’s eyes darted from one to the other. “Kept the extensions, huh?” he asked looking at Erika’s very long hair.

“Kept?” Samantha cocked her head at Jake. “You’ve seen her before today?”

“Yeah, at the mall.” Jake lied. He shot Erika a look of apology.

Samantha caught it and looked back and forth from the two. “What am I not a part of?” she demanded.

Erika looked at Jake and sighed heavily. She turned in her chair to look at Samantha. “Jake was part of the photo shoot.”

Samantha looked confused. “I thought it was for a spa advertising for Prom?”

Erika nodded. “Jake was my Prom date.”

“What?” Samantha’s voice shot up in surprise.

“Don’t tell Tricia.” Jake pleaded. “I don’t want to have to go through all of that again so soon.”

“Did you kiss again?” Samantha asked jokingly.

Jake and Erika were quiet and shared a guilt-ridden look.

“Holy Shit!... Again?” Samantha was having a hard time digesting this new secret.

“Language! Samantha.” Mrs. Anderson called “Everyone take their seats it’s time to start class.

Halfway through class, a student came into the class and handed Mrs. Anderson a note. The teacher scanned it and nodded. “Erika, Samantha, you’re wanted in the office.

“Ooooh.” Several students teased.

“Good luck.” Jake wished them as they got up from their seats.

“Take your things.” Mrs. Anderson instructed. “Just in case you aren’t back before the end of class.”

Tricia and Stephanie sat on opposite ends of a conference table with a school security guard standing against the wall, watching them.

“In here.” The Principal called them into her office. “Have a seat.”

Erika’s heart pounded a little harder in her chest as she sat before the principal.

“Tell me what happened between Tricia and Stephanie.” She ordered.

Erika and Samantha took turns detailing what they witnessed.

“Look,” Erika let out a breath. “Stephanie found out who I really am last month and has been threatening to expose my secret to the school. This morning, she called me some pretty harsh names and Tricia, well Tricia defended me.”

“Stephanie started it.” Samantha agreed.

“Stephanie started the fight?” the Principal asked for clarification.

“Yes, she spat at Erika.” Samantha’s voice took on an edge.

“Who threw the first punch?”

“Well.” Erika didn’t want to lie, even to save her friend. She had spent too much time and effort gaining the schools trust, she just couldn’t blow that now. “Tricia slapped Stephanie after she spat at me.”

“But Stephanie attacked Tricia.” Samantha stepped in. “Tricia was just defending herself.”

“Okay.” The Principal put her hands up. “I believe you both, but there are always more than one side to a story. So, I’m going to have you two write down in your own words what you saw happen. Go out and sit in the front office. And no talking. I want you each to tell me in your own words.”

Erika and Samantha got up and passed the conference room again. Tricia sat back in her chair with her arms crossed over her chest in defiance looking at odds with the way she was dressed. Stephanie glowered at them as they passed. One side of her face was bright red, presumably from the slap, and she held an ice pack to the corner of her mouth.

Erika was half way through writing her view of the fight when Tricia’s parents walked in.

“I’m sorry.” Erika wanted to start crying again. “She was defending me.”

“It’s alright, Erika.” Tricia’s mother gave her a tight smile. “We’re not new to this.”

“Leeza was an even bigger handful.” Tricia’s father agreed.

Tricia’s parents joined the Principal in the office for a long while. Erika finished her account and sat fretting as she watched the office door. After a bit, the Principal exited and guided Tricia into the office to join her parents.

Erika’s heart felt like jack rabbits, her stomach felt as if the acid was about to erode right through the lining.

“Deep breath.” Samantha coached. “You aren’t the one in trouble and there is absolutely nothing we can do to change the outcome of this.”

“I know.” Erika’s eyes brimmed with tears. “I just hate that she is getting in trouble over this. . . this stupid situation.”

A few minutes later, Tricia and her parents exited the room. Tricia’s eyes were red and swollen from crying. She stopped in front of Erika as her parents continued to the door.

“I’m so sorry.” Erika’s heart felt like it was breaking.

“Don’t be. It was worth it.” Tricia forced a smile. “I’ll text you later.” She leaned down and kissed Erika on the forehead before following her parents.

--o0o--

“You’re coming to lunch, right?” Victoria touched Erika’s arm.

Erika shook her head. “I don’t want to deal with the crowd.”

“Because of Tricia?”

Erika nodded. “I need to call her and see if she’s alright.”

“From what I heard, Strange Stephanie is the one who got the worst of it.”

Erika sighed. “It’s all my fault.”

“Bull shit.” Victoria swore. “I heard what you did for her at the mall and saw how you went out of your way to make friends with her here at school. That bitch deserves Tricia’s wrath.”

“But what if she tells?” Erika whispered hoarsely.

“I think it’s about time that the world knows.” Victoria put her hands on her hips. “Who cares if people know? You’ve shown your worth these past few months. I think you’d be surprised at how many people would support you.”

Erika shook her head. “You haven’t been on the receiving end of people when they don’t support you.”

Victoria pulled her to a private area and lowered her voice. “The school paper would like to do an article on you, especially since you’re now modeling. This might be the perfect way to let the cat out of the bag.”

“No, and absolutely not.” Erika growled. “It’s bad enough that my picture is on a billboard outside of school, I don’t want an article done on me too. I’ve been trying to fit in, be part of the wallpaper, not stand out.”

“Erika, you wouldn’t know how to be wallpaper. Didn’t camp teach you that? Half the girls at camp wanted to be you and most of the guys wanted to be with you. And that was you just starting to become the wonderful person you are today. You are one of the more popular girls at Washington High and people at Adams High even know about you.”

Erika closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

“If you didn’t want to be popular, why did you go and start modeling?” Victoria went on. “Your face is on posters, buses, taxis and billboards all over Constitution and in a short time, your Serenity Spa ad will be all over the place.”

“I didn’t realize it was going to be such a huge ad campaign.” Erika defended. I figured a few brochures and maybe a poster here or there.”

Victoria shook her head. “Then why did you sign with an agent?”

“How do you know about that?”

“I’m a reporter, duh.”

Part of Erika wanted to just scream and scream. Maybe she should call Mr. Winters and just cancel the whole thing. It was too late to cancel Serenity Spa, but maybe she could convince them to use her photos sparingly.

“I’ve got most of the article on you already written.” Victoria told her. “I’ll email it to you to proof. I won’t print it unless I get your permission.”

“Delete it. You won’t get my permission.” Erika was getting upset. “I can’t believe you’d write an article on me, Victoria. Erika stormed off. She just needed to be alone. She needed to hear Tricia’s voice, to know that she was okay.

Erika walked. She walked searching for a place to call Tricia, to be alone with Tricia. Outside was too cold, the library didn’t allow cell phones. The lunch room was definitely out of the question. She’d go to Samantha’s car, but it was locked and Samantha was in the lunch room.

She didn’t know how, but she did find a private place, a quiet place. She found herself in the audio/visual room. She didn’t know how she got there, or why she went there, but no one else was there.

“Hey.” Tricia answered. “How are you doing?”

“Me?” Erika sounded surprised. “I half expected to hear your mom or dad on the phone, or it going to voicemail. Are you okay? Stephanie didn’t hurt you, did she?”

“I’m fine.” Tricia told her. “Mom and Dad were only a little upset. Once I told them the details of what Stephanie did and said, they relaxed. Leeza used to get in all kinds of fights, so my throwing down Stephanie is nothing.

“You shouldn’t have done that.” Erika admonished.

“I had to.” Tricia stated. “She not only treated you less than human, she spat at you and threatened you. I had to do something.”

“What if she decides to take revenge by telling everyone.” Erika explained. “She could take out an ad in the paper, post a Youtube video, spread it on the school website, Facebook, there are any number of ways that she could tell everyone.”

Tricia was silent.

“My life here in Constitution could be over.”

Tricia was still silent.

“Someone freaking shot the Annie Wilson because she was found out.”

“I’m sorry.” Tricia was crying. “I’m sorry, Erika. I . . . I just couldn’t stand there and let her treat you that way.” Tricia’s voice broke. “Not after how I saw people treat Leeza, not after what they said about her behind her back. I just couldn’t.”

It was Erika’s turn to be silent. Tears fell freely down her cheeks.

“I just couldn’t stand by again.” Tricia’s voice could hardly be heard.

“I’m sorry, Tricia.” Erika managed to get out. “You never told me this about your sister.”

“It’s too painful.” Tricia admitted. “It was horrible, Erika. I don’t know how she made it through as well as she has. I know you are having a hard time, and don’t want anyone to know, but Leeza, she didn’t have that option. The way people treated her. . . You just can’t imagine.”

“I’m so sorry.” Erika cried.

“I know.” Tricia tried to soothe over the phone. “I know.

The phone went silent, all either could hear was the other breathing. They may have been miles apart, but Erika felt that she was closer to Tricia at that moment than she had ever been.

“Crap.” Erika swore. “I’m starting to get a headache.”

“Hang up and get to the Nurses office.” Tricia ordered.

“I love you, Tricia.” Erika told her.

“I love you too. Hang up and go.”

Erika hung up and wiped her eyes on her sleeve. She didn’t care if it ruined her sweater. She exited the door and made it to the Nurses station which wasn’t far from the main office.

“Hello Erika.” The Nurse greeted. “Uh oh, are you having an episode?”

“I don’t know. I’m getting a headache.”

The Nurse came up to her and helped her over to a cot. “Lay down. Should I call an ambulance?”

Erika shook her head. “Don’t call anyone unless I start seizing, please. I don’t want to cause a false alarm.”

“Have you been crying?” the nurse inquired as she took Erika’s pulse.

“Yes.” She snuffed a little. “It could be just a crying headache.”

The nurse took her temperature and blood pressure. “Just lay back. I’ll dim the lights.”

What a sucky first day back to school. Erika thought as she started to sleep.

Chapter 20

“Erika.” Someone called “Erika? Are you alright?”

Erika opened her eyes. “Yes. I think I fell asleep.”

The nurse nodded. “I checked on you, but you were out. I just wanted to make sure you weren’t having a mild seizure.”

Erika shook her head. “Just sleeping. I feel better now. Thank you. What period is it?”

“Last period.” She looked up from her watch.

Erika stepped into history class and handed the teacher her hall pass before taking her seat. Ugh, another lecture on the fall of the Roman Empire. Maybe she should have stayed in the nurse’s office.

Krystal caught up with her after class. “I heard Tricia was thrown out of school.”

Erika rolled her eyes. “That is a bit of an exaggeration.”

Krystal looked down at her friend. “How was Christmas?”

“Busy. You?”

“The same.” Jorge got me this.” She fingered a pretty pendent on a delicate chain.”

“Very pretty.” Erika smiled. “I’ll meet you at practice. I’ve gotta change”

Erika emerged from the bathroom in her rally practice gear to find Samantha waiting for her.

“Hurry, Melissa has called a meeting.”

“What about?” Erika’s heart skipped a beat.

Samantha shrugged.

When they got to the gym, most of cheer and rally were sitting in the stands. Samantha and Erika took a seat next to Krystal and Jorge.

Melissa, followed by Jordan strolled out of the locker room. Erika looked around, but didn’t find Taylor.

“Listen up!” Melissa began getting everyone’s attention. “I have an announcement Taylor has decided that for personal reasons that she can no longer be part of Rally. So as of today, Jordan will be the leader of Rally.”

“is Taylor sick? One girl asked.

“Its personal.” Melissa repeated more firmly. “Please don’t badger her in the halls or class. Like I said, it’s a personal matter.”

Samantha and Erika exchanged looks. This was not the outcome Erika had wanted. Perhaps she should speak with her. Taylor was a great rally leader as well as an amazing dancer. Erika decided to ask her to come back. She shouldn’t be asked to leave any more than Erika.

So, if Taylor was out who was going to lead Rally?

“So,” Melinda announced, “Jordon will be taking over Rally.

A small applause sounded in the news. Jordon blushed, but smiled.

“Alright, lets get to work!” Melinda directed.

Going through the Rally dance moves was a different experience having long hair. The long hair flicking and into her face or catching in her mouth was not a pleasant experience. About half way through she started to get the hang of tossing her head to keep it clear and even began enjoying the feeling of it brushing against her back and shoulders.

Erika met Samantha at her car.

“Tricia’s?” She asked knowing the answer.

“Yes please.”

The friends got into the car. “You need to tell Tricia about Jake at the spa.” Samantha put her seat belt on then checked both mirrors before backing up.

“I know.” Erika sighed. “I Know. I almost forgot with all that has been happening today. Do you know where Taylor lives?”

“Why?”

“I don’t like how that ended.” Erika stated.

“She made her choice.” Samantha shrugged.

“Still.” Erika purposefully didn’t look at the billboard.

Erika knocked on Tricia’s door. A moment later, Tricia opened it.

“Hello.” She greeted, stepping aside to admit Erika. “You didn’t need to come checking on me, but I’m glad you did.” Her lips feathered across Erika’s.

An electric charge coursed through her body. Erika removed her coat and took Tricia’s hand. “We need to talk.”

The sweet adoring look on Tricia’s face turned to one of concern. “Are you mad at me?” She inquired.

Erika shook her head. Tricia took a deep breath and led her to the formal living room. The two sat down, Tricia holding both of Erika’s hands.

“Okay.” She took a deep breath. “Let’s have it.”

Erika took a deep breath. “First, I didn’t know. I really didn’t, but…” She paused then continued. “Jake was a model at the spa photo shoot. He was my supposed prom date.” Erika closed her eyes waiting for an explosion. She opened them to see Tricia’s face thoughtful but also relaxed.

“I thought you were going to break up with me.” She stated at last. “Jake, huh?”

Erika nodded. “There’s more.” She winced. “as part of the shoot we…”

“Kissed?” Tricia almost growled.”

Erika nodded. “There was nothing in it and it meant nothing, it was only for the shoot.” She rushed on.

Tricia took a deep breath and studied her. “It’s alright.” She finally stated. “Thank you for telling me. I’d hate to have found out when the ad came out.”

Erika released a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. “Really?” She looked hopeful.

Tricia nodded. “I don’t like that you are kissing boys, but I understand that it was a modeling thing. It is something I’m going to have to be alright with if I’m dating a model.”

“Thank you.” Erika gushed. “I was so afraid that you’d break up with me because of it.”

Tricia giggled. “And here, I thought you were here to break up with me.” Tricia lunged forward and hungrily kissed Erika.

Erika awoke, naked between the sheets of Tricia’s bed. She started up, her heart racing. What time was it? She fumbled around looking for her phone. Swiping the screen, she sighed with relief, it was still early.

“Anyone home?” Leeza called. “Tricia?”

Tricia stirred next to her.

“Tricia.” Erika shook her girlfriends shoulder, “Tricia.”

Tricia rolled over and peeked through her eyelashes. “Hmm?”

“Leeza is calling for you.” Erika jumped out of bed and started searching for her clothing. Panties and bra, she found, but her skirt and blouse, were no where to be seen.

The bedroom door opened, Erika snapped her head up to see Leeza in the doorway holding her missing articles of clothing. “Good thing I got here before mom and dad.” She directed to her sister. She then took in the both of them. “I hope you two are being safe.”

Leeza stepped forward and handed Erika her clothing. She then pulled her other hand out from behind her back and tossed Tricia’s clothes on to the foot of the bed. “Some of these were laying in the front room. Mom and Dad would have a fit.”

Tricia’s blush matched her hair.

Leeza turned to Erika. “Just because you are on hormones, doesn’t mean you can’t still get her pregnant.”

“We were safe.” Erika insisted. She held Leeza’s gaze until Leeza nodded.

Leeza turned back to Tricia. “Mom and Dad may be very liberal in how they raise us, but that doesn’t mean you can go flaunting it. Please have a little more respect in the future.”

“Okay.” Tricia didn’t argue.

Leeza’s body relaxed. “So how bad was it today? Mom called me this afternoon.”

Erika and Tricia related the events of the morning while getting dressed.

The sound of the garage door alerted them to the parents’ arrival. Erika found herself wrapped in a hug that enveloped Tricia as well.

“I’m proud of you both. I’m sorry you had to go through that.” She released them and looked at Tricia. “After all of the issues they had to deal with while I was transitioning in school, I’m sure the school admin isn’t sure what just happened.” She smiled.

“We’re home.” Tricia’s father called.

“We brought pizza.” Her mother announced right after.

--o0o—

“Thanks for the ride.” Erika slid out of Leeza’s car and waved good bye. She checked her phone and sighed heavily. Her mother and father had texted her to get home. She was sure that the principal had called them, and now to find out what kind of trouble she might be in.

“I’m home.” She tried to sound cheerful as she entered. She hung up her coat and purse, slipping her phone from it.

“We are in here.” Her father called from the living room.

Erika took a deep breath, slowly let it out and pasted a smile on her face that belied her heart doing acrobatics in her chest. Her heels clicked as she walked down the hard wood floored hall.

“Hi.” She could feel her face heating. Her parents were both sitting on the couch. Her father gestured to a chair placed in front of them.

“Oh crap.” She told herself.

“So. . . “ Her mother began. “We received calls from your school today.”

Her dad continued, “Before we decide anything, we want to hear about your involvement in this. . . this situation.”

“And you had better be honest, because we know more than you think.” Her mother finished.

“I didn’t do anything.” Erika protested as she took her seat. She almost cringed when her mother gave her the one raised eyebrow ‘knowing’ look.

Erika related to her parents what had happened. It was getting easier since she and Tricia had both had to re-tell it a few times already.

“And you didn’t provoke it?” her mother asked. “You didn’t say anything that might have set Stephanie off?”

“No.” Erika shook her head, her long hair bounced around her shoulders. She kind of liked how that felt. “Like I said, before Christmas break, I thought we might have been friends, then she was like a possessed person this morning.”

“Tricia’s parents called and spoke to us while you were on your way home.” Her father stated.

That’s why Leeza insisted on stopping at the grocery store before dropping me. Erika realized.

“They explained what had been said and done at the school. They also said, and Tricia insisted, that you had no part in it.”

“Dad, Mom,” Erika looked at each in turn. “I have been bullied so many times and have been treated like crap by so many people, I could never… ever treat anyone like that. You know me, I’ve always tried to avoid and run away from problems.”

“We know.” Her mother nodded. “We just wanted to make sure that you had no part in it. Or that your girlfriend was just trying to cover for you.”

Erika was shaking her head. Tears were blurring her vision. “I just froze, I didn’t know what to do. I was a coward again. Tricia was so amazing, but I was so scared for her or what they still might do to her.” Her voice was trembling. “They still haven’t said whether or not she will be kicked off the dive team.”

“Maybe we should start those self-defense classes again.” Her father stated.

“Fighting isn’t the answer.” Her mother protested.

“Self defense is an answer.” He stated. “I know our daughter well enough by now to know that she would never start a fight, but I would like her to know how to finish one.”

Inwardly Erika was glowing. Her father was calling her his daughter. It felt so good she almost forgot what they were discussing.

“Mom, Dad?” Erika got their attention. “I’m thinking of dropping Rally. . . “

“What?” her mother exclaimed. “I thought you liked Rally.”

“I do, I do, but with me flying to Los Angeles and maybe doing more modeling, I don’t think it is fair to my team. I’ve already missed so much because of my surgery and it just isn’t fair to them.”

Her mother looked to her father then back to her. “If that is really what you want.”

“No, but it is best for my team.” She stated. “I’m still thinking about it, I haven’t told anyone yet, cuz I haven’t decided.”

Her parents were nodding with understanding.

“Anything else?” She asked. “I’m not grounded, am I?” she looked at each.

“No.” her father began to stand. “You haven’t done anything wrong. You just got mixed up in an unfortunate situation.”

“Thanks Daddy.” She stood and kissed his cheek. “I have homework.”

Her parents nodded a dismissal.

Erika went to her room and tried to concentrate on her school work but gave up. Too many things were happening yet again.

She pulled out her phone.

Taylor, I really need to talk to you. Can you meet me I front of the school tomorrow? She texted. She put the phone down. She really didn’t like the fact that Taylor quit Rally. She was hoping Taylor would be a bit more accepting.

Her phone alerted an incoming text. There’s nothing to say.

Please. She text back.

I don’t know was the response.

Erika then text Samantha to please pick her up a little early in the morning.

--o0o—

“Why won’t you just tell me?” Samantha pleaded. “It’s freezing out here.”

Erika ignored her grumbling and continued to scan the incoming students. She made sure to be warm this morning. Thick leggings under a sweater dress and her boots. Over which she wore her winter coat, and gloves.

Her heart quickened when she spotted Taylor approaching. The former Rally squad mate wore a scowl.

Erika forced a smile.

“You are meeting with Taylor?” Samantha groaned. “Seriously?”

“What do you want.” Taylor growled.

“Thank you for meeting me.” Erika forced a grin. “Taylor, I really like you and respect you and I really didn’t want you to quit the Rally squad.”

“Melinda didn’t give me much of a choice.”

“Look,” Erika continued. “I love being on the squad. I love hanging out with you and being a part of something so cool and full of spirit. But I have a very busy schedule coming up and I have already missed so much practice that it really wouldn’t be fair to the squad for me to miss more. So, I have decided to drop out of Rally and would like to, with your okay, talk to Melinda and ask her to take you back in my place.”

“What?” Samantha and Taylor both exclaimed.

“But we worked so hard to keep you.” Samantha protested.

“Why would you do that?” Taylor said on top of Samantha.

“With one major condition.” Erika raised her voice to be heard over them. “Make it two.”

Both girls looked at her.

“There had to be a catch.” Taylor scoffed. “What is it?”

“One, you keep my secret.” Erika ticked off a finger. “You don’t tell a soul or do anything to ‘out’ me.”

Taylor rolled her eyes, “What’s the second?”

“You’ll still let me help with the posters if and when I have time.”

Both girls stared at her agog.

“Are you sure you want to quit?” Samantha sounded injured. Which is why Erika chose not to tell her beforehand.

“I don’t want to.” Erika affirmed. “But it looks like I will be missing more practices because of other commitments. It really isn’t fair to the squad.”

“And you would go to Melinda on my behalf?” Taylor looked skeptical.

“Taylor, I’ve never had a problem with you.” Erika gave her a friendly look. “I just didn’t want my secret getting out or to be kicked off of the squad.”

“I can’t believe you are doing this.” Samantha bemoaned.

Erika shot her a stern look. “It’s my choice, and it’s what’s best for the squad.”

“When do you plan to talk to her?” Taylor asked.

“Lunch if possible, if not, before practice starts.”

Taylor nodded. “Okay, it’s a deal.” She relented.

“You’ll keep my secret?”

Taylor nodded.

“If she doesn’t, I’ll make sure she gets kicked off.” Samantha promised. “Now can we get out the cold?”

Erika and Taylor gave each other agreeing looks before joining Samantha as she entered the school.

School somehow seemed empty without Tricia. She was to serve a three-day suspension for fighting but allowed to stay on the dive team with the coach’s approval. Strange Stephanie, Erika felt better about referring to her by that name now, also received a suspension

“Really?” Samantha shook her head. “I can’t believe you are quitting Rally.”

“Not quitting, Dropping.” Erika stated. “I offered to still work on the posters.”

“Which they will definitely let you do.”

The two walked into homeroom.

--o0o—

Erika and Victoria walked down the hall towards the cafeteria.

“I heard you wanted to speak with me?” Melinda was waiting for them.

“Hi Melinda, Yes.” Erika greeted. She glanced around. “Can we go somewhere more private?”

Melinda shrugged her gorgeous shimmering black hair waved almost floated near the back of her knees. Erika followed her off to the side to an alcove, the door led to a part of the school that wasn’t frequented as much.

“What do you want?” Melinda inquired.

“I’ve been giving it a lot of thought lately.” Erika began, “I’ve got other things out side of school going on. I’m leaving tomorrow for a week in Hollywood, and with my recovering from brain surgery as well as dealing with our house burning down, well I think it might be best if I dropped Rally squad. It just isn’t fair to the rest of the girls who are there every day, while I have one excuse after another as to why I can’t do this or that.”

Melinda’s eyes became hard. Her face turned pink and she closed her eyes for a long moment before opening them again. “You couldn’t figure this out before this drama with Taylor happened?” she growled.

“Well, I was hoping that since I’ll be dropping out, that you could ask Taylor to come back.” Erika inserted.

“No.” Melinda snapped. “Taylor walked off. She made her choice not to be part of the team.”

“But that was because of me.” Erika was having trouble finding her voice. This should have been easy. She’d quit and Taylor would be back. This scenario she was not prepared for.

“Yes, it was, Erika.” Melinda’s voice was like ice. “And because she is intolerant of people who don’t fit into her mold of the world. I can’t say that I’m sad seeing you leave the squad. We did our best to help you become part of the team. Samantha had to call in a lot of favors to get you that spot. I am very sad however that I had to give Taylor the choice of leaving and she took it, but I can’t have her back on the squad.”

Erika’s vison was blurring because of the tears. “But I didn’t want Taylor to quit, I just wanted her to accept me and treat me like everyone else.”

“Her unwillingness to do so, shows a lack of character.” Melinda stated. “She showed that she can’t treat everyone at this school with the same respect. I don’t want that on my team, especially as a leader.”

“Can’t you give her another chance?” Erika pleaded. “I’m sure she’ll be better.”

“My answer is no.” Melinda spun, her long tresses a black veil billowing in the wind.

“Please Melinda?” Erika’s heart wasn’t in it. Melinda had made up her mind.

Hope flitted across her heart as Melinda turned towards her again.

“Please turn your uniform in as soon as you get back from your trip.” She simply and coldly stated before turning back to where she had been going.

“Oh hell.” Erika cursed under her breath. “Taylor is going to kill me.”

With Tricia not around, she didn’t want to deal with the cafeteria. She retraced her steps down the hall and found the library. This was always a quiet place for contemplation. She pulled out her phone and text Samantha

Erika: Melinda won’t let Taylor back on the squad.

Samantha: I didn’t think she would. I wish you’d have spoken to me about this first.

Erika: Taylor is going to be so pissed.

Samantha: It is a choice that she made.

Erika: She is a great Rally Leader, why won’t Melinda take her back?

Samantha: She has her reasons. And with Melinda, they usually are pretty good ones.

Samantha: Where are you?

Erika: In the Library

Erka: trying to figure things out.

Samantha: Hiding from Taylor?

Erika: That too.

Samantha: Better to get it over with

Erika: I know. I’d even let her pound on me, but I can’t be showing up in Hollywood all bruised.

Samantha: You should have spoken with me and Melinda before approaching Taylor

Erika: I know that now.

Erika: I am so sorry, Samantha. Melinda said you called in a lot of favors to get me on the Squad.

Samantha: Not really, and it was worth it.

Samantha: I’m just sad that you are quitting.

Erika: Not quitting, dropping.

Samantha: same dif.

Erika: Are you angry with me?

Samantha: No

Samantha: disappointed.

Erika: God, that’s worse.

Erika: I love you like a sister.

Samantha: ditto

Erika: Can I get a ride to Tricia’s after school?

Samantha: sorry, I have Cheer.

Erika’s heart felt like it was going to fall through her body and hit the floor. “What have I done?” She asked herself.

The rest of the day dragged on. She had no idea what was taught in any of her classes. She could only think on two things. Disappointing Samantha, and how she was going to tell Taylor.

Chapter 21
Erika goes to Hollywood

Erika sat looking out the window of the Boeing Jet. The planet was somewhere thirty thousand feet below them, but all she could see was the white clouds.

She was only a little boy the last time she had ever flown. She barely remembered it. It was exhilarating as was the whole idea of this trip. She just wished that she hadn’t left everything at school in such a mess. Shannon was disappointed, Tricia suspended, and Taylor hurt and pissed. Samantha had been right, she should have spoken to her and Melinda first.

Erika had met up with Taylor after school and before Cheer/Rally practice.

“Did you speak with Melinda?” Taylor had asked.

Erika wanted to start crying all over again. She nodded.

“So, I’m back on the squad?”

Erika shook her head. “No. Melinda said that once you quit, you weren’t allowed to re-join.”

“What?” Taylor had exclaimed. “I only quit because of you.”

“I know, I know.” Erika had a hard time looking Taylor in the eye.

“Fuck you, you pervert! I went through all of that for you to quit a couple of weeks later?” Taylor was losing it. “Fuck you!”

Erika felt her bottom lip quiver. “I am so sorry, Taylor. I never wanted you to quit, I thought that if I quit, Melinda would let you back on. Honestly, I did.”

“My parents are pissed.” Taylor growled. “I was supposed to try and get a scholarship doing cheer. I walked away because of your sorry, fake, perverted ass! You fucking Bitch!”

“Taylor!” Melinda yelled stopping what ever was going to happen next.

Taylor and Erika turned to face the Cheer leader. Melinda walked right up and stood staring up at the pissed off young lady, “You made a choice to quit Rally. You made a choice to walk away from a possible scholarship. You made the choice to treat a member of the student body let alone a team mate with contempt. Your choice to use this kind of language and your choice to treat Erika in this manner is exactly why I don’t want you back on Rally.”

The two girls stood staring in a standoff. “You are a bigot, disguise it however you want, but you are, and there is no position available on the squad for a bigot.”

Taylor spun and stormed out of the building.
--o0o—

The pilot’s scratchy voice sounded over the P.A. announcing that they would start their decent into LAX.

Erika’s heart fluttered with anxiety. She was so excited she almost bounced in her seat.

Seventy-three degrees, the pilot had said. Oh, to wear short skirts without leggings, to wear sandals instead of boots. Who needs a jacket in seventy-three degrees?

The terminal was all indoors, the air conditioning was keeping the building cool. At the security gate, Erika spotted a man dressed in black and white holding a sign with her name on it.

“Hello.” Her mother greeted. “This is Erika Summers.”

“Hello Ms. Summers.” He greeted Erika. “Mr. Winters sent me to take you to your hotel. Do you have any bags checked?”

“No.” Erika shook her head. “Just these.” She referred to their small carry-ons.

“Please, let me take those.” He reached and both she and her mother gave over their bags.

Erika stepped outside for the first time and rejoiced in the warmth of Southern California. She took in a deep breath and smelled the warm air, the baking concrete, a slight hint of salt from the ocean, the Pacific Ocean, and almost giggled when she saw the palm trees.

They followed the driver out to a black limousine. Just as they were arriving, a beautiful woman stepped out the car and smiled.

“Mrs. Martin, Ms. Summers.” She greeted. “My name is Brook. I’m one of Mr. Winters’ assistants.” She took each of their hands in turn with a light squeeze. “Please take a seat.” She gestured into the limo.

The driver had already put their bags in the trunk and was standing behind the open door waiting for them.

“I’ve never been in a limo before.” Erika gasped as she slid across the back seat to make room for her mother.

Once her mother was in, Brook ducked in and sat across from them facing backwards.

“Won’t you get sick sitting that way?” Erika’s mother asked.

Brook smiled. “Not at all, I’m actually used to it by now, but thank you for asking.”

The driver eased out into traffic

“Mr. Winters is excited to meet with you.” She looked Erika and her mother in the eye. “First things first, is to get you to your hotel. Are you hungry? Have you eaten?”

“I’m fine at the moment.” Erika’s mom smiled.

“Erika?” Brook asked.

“I’m good.” Erika was staring out the window at the massive city with all of its concrete, stucco houses and palm trees.

“Your first trip to Los Angeles?” Brook probed.

Erika nodded.

“Unfortunately, you’re going to be a bit busy, so there won’t be much time for sightseeing.”

Erika pouted. She was hoping to at see the Pacific Ocean, and Hollywood’s walk of fame.

“Mr. Winters will meet with you to finalize your contract after you’ve settled into your hotel, then he would like you to join him for dinner tonight.” Brook explained. “Tomorrow, morning, he has lined up a photo shoot for you then you’ll have the afternoon off.” She paused. “You didn’t bring any formal wear, did you?” She asked.

“No.” Mrs. Martin shook her head. We figured we’d be here for the contract signing and then perhaps a few photo shoots. Why?”

Mr. Winters would like Erika to start getting her face known.” Brook smiled at Erika. “He has arranged for an invite to Tommy Kincaid’s charity ball tomorrow night.”

“Tommy Kincaid?” Erika almost shrieked. He was only one of the best leading men in films. And she was getting invited to his party?

“Since you are underage, your mother will be expected to attend with you.” Brook gave Mrs. Martin a knowing look. “It’ll be helpful for her career and image if everyone knows that you are an involved mother.” Brook tapped at her tablet for a moment then looked back up. “After your contract signing, I’ll take you shopping for some appropriate dresses.”

“I’m not sure we have that kind of money to drop on formal dresses, especially the kind that are expected at a ball.” Mrs. Martin bit her lower lip.

“Mr. Winters has connections.” Brook assured. “I believe he’ll give you and advance that will more than cover it.”

Erika kept looking out the windows at the strange environment. She had never seen so many cars on such wide freeways before. She’d heard that Los Angeles was big, but this was unfathomable. She made a mental note to pull up a map to study as soon as she had the time.

“You flew in at a good time.” Brook commented. “The traffic is light this time of day so we are making good time. I’ll see if you have time for a short nap before meeting with Mr. Winters.”

Nap? Erika thought. Who can nap when in Hollywood? She then stifled a yawn. It had been an early start, but still, there was so much to see and do and she was going to meet Tommy Kincaid. Samantha will be so envious.

It wasn’t long before the limo pulled up to the front of a hotel. One of the valet’s opened the door and allowed the women out. Erika took in the new scent of the city again, feeling the warmth radiating from all of the concrete and stucco seeped into her bones.
Up a few red carpeted stairs and they were in a huge decedent lounge of a hotel. Erika could feel her shoes sink into the thick plush carpets that ran the length of the marbled room.

“Key for room 2057, Martin.” Brook told the front desk.

“Here you are.” The tan, blonde woman smiled at Brook then to Erika and her mother.

Once they had taken the elevator up and walked down the hall, Brook popped the key card into the door lock and pushed open the door to a good sized main room.

“You’ll each have your own room.” Brook waved to a room on either side of the reception room.

Erika accepted her suit case from the bellhop and entered one of the nicely decorated rooms.

“Do we have time to freshen up?” She heard her mother ask Brooklyn.

“Yes, of course.”

Erika explored the connecting bathroom. Bigger than she had at home, but not luxury, it was going to be quite nice. She caught sight of her self in the mirror and cringed. She was supposed to be a model, and Brooklyn saw her looking like this? She quickly retrieved her makeup from her suit case and set to work, trying to freshen up a tired face.

“How are you doing in there, Erika?” Brook inquired from the main room.

She poked her head out of her room, “Um, what shall I wear to the meeting with Mr. Winters?”

Brook’s smile broadened. “You’re in luck.” She chuckled as she walked towards Erika. “One of my main jobs for Mr. Winters is helping his clients get ready for events. I’m kind of a personal shopper. Some of his clients even ask for my help after they become stars.”

“Really? Who?” Erika watched as Brook gracefully stepped over to her bed where her suitcase was opened.

“Unfortunately, I’m not allowed to say,” She sighed. “But you’d recognize the names.”

“I didn’t know what to pack.” Erika bit her lower lip.

“Well, lets see what you have.” Brook suggested.

A few minutes later, Erika stepped out of her room wearing a black, knee-length pencil skirt with a bright red top and black flats.

“Perfect.” Brook nodded.

“Wow, that looks nice.” Her mother joined them.

--o0o—

It was a short ride in the limo to the front of the building where Mr. Winter’s office was located.

After checking through security, Brook took them to the elevators. Getting off on the twentieth floor, she took them through large glass double doors.

“Have a seat here.” She instructed. “I’ll see if he is available yet.”

Erika looked around the posh reception area with its comfortable furnishings. Hundreds of framed pictures of celebrities lined one long wall opposite from the wall of windows looking down over Hollywood and its surroundings.

Too excited to sit, Erika got up and began perusing the pictures of celebrities. Not just celebrities, but musicians, models, and even athletes. “How did we get here?” She wondered aloud.

“I’m not sure.” Her mother sounded just as bewildered. “I think it started when you insisted on going to summer camp.”

Erika stared at her mother for a moment in shock before realizing that she was right. Samantha’s suggestion that she try wearing her shoes started this path in life.

“Here’s Tommy Kincaid and Michelle Gray.” Erika practically swooned. “They make such a great couple. And we might get to meet them tomorrow.”

“Erika? Mrs. Martin?” a deep voice greeted interrupting Erika’s excitement. “I’m Hal Winters, please come with me.”

Erika and her mother followed Mr. Winters into a glass conference room, the opposite wall was window from floor to ceiling.

“Please have a seat.” Mr. Winters indicated.

Erika smoothed her skirt under her as she sat. Why was her heart beating so hard in her chest?

“Welcome to Hollywood.” Mr. Winters took a seat opposite of them. “It’s good to meet face to face.” He smiled at Erika. “You’re even more pretty in person.” He stated. His eyes flicked to her mother and back. “I see you take after your mother.”

“Thank you, Mr. Winters.”

“Please, it’s Hal.” He leaned back in his chair, more relaxed.

Brook entered the room with a file of paperwork and ice-cold bottles of water.

“Water?” he offered. “I don’t know how it is in Constitution, but here, we don’t drink the tap water.

Erika filed that away. Don’t drink the tap water. She took the offered water and took as small sip.

Brook shot her a smile and exited the room.

Hal took a long draw on the water then recapping it, set it aside. He opened the file and took out a stack of papers. “Now down to business.” He scanned the front page and nodded sub-consciously before pushing towards her mother.” This is as your husband reviewed.” He stated.

Erika’s thought drifted to what parties with celebrities might be like as her mother and Hal went over the specifics of the contract.

“Okay, that sounds good.” Her mother nodded.

“Great.” Hal smiled taking out a pen. “I’ll need both of your signatures.”

Both she and her mother signed at the appropriate places.

“Fantastic.” Mr. Winters smiled. “Now, I am going to have Brook spend the rest of the afternoon and most of tomorrow with you. I’m sure she informed you that I have arranged for you to attend Tommy Kincaid’s ball tomorrow evening.”

Erika and her mother nodded.

“Brook will take you to get dresses for the occasion. Tomorrow you’ll have an early start, I have you scheduled for new head shots.” He stopped and looked directly at Erika. “How do you feel about acting?”

“Um, I’ve never really thought about it.” Erika looked to her mother and back to Mr. Winters.

“I have you tentatively scheduled for a call for a commercial. If your photo shoot goes well, I’ll have Brook take you so that you can meet with the director. It’s just a local commercial, not a big deal, but something to get your feet wet with. Just remember that most actors get rejected for quite a while, but it’s my job to work you in to getting a few shots.”

As if on que, Brook opened the room with a smile. Mr. Winters stood and offered his hand to Erika. “Its great to have you on board. I’m looking forward to working with you.” He then took Erika’s mother’s hand. “I’ll see you both for dinner tonight?”

“Yes.” Her mother smiled. “Thank you, Hal.”

“Follow me.” Brook instructed. She paused at the reception room. “Anyone need to use the ladies room?”

Erika paused. “I should probably.”

“Third door on the left.” Brook pointed down the hall.

Erika’s mother joined her in the bathroom. It was the first time she had used the ladies’ bathroom with her mother. It was awkwardly quiet. What does a transgender woman talk about with her mother while using the toilet?

Her mother in the stall next to hers broke the silence. “Wow. Mr. Winters has written you a pretty generous contract. I didn’t believe it when your father spoke to me about it, but it was all there as promised.” She paused. “Erika, you could possibly make enough money to pay for all of your college and a down payment on a house, if things still go as good as they see to be.”

Erika hadn’t even thought about college in…. well…. Since before summer. She had been focused so much on surviving school, a house fire, a brain tumor along with transitioning and for the first time, a social life. College seemed something so far away yet.

She finished up and was washing her hands when her mother joined her at the sink. She straightened a stray hair and smoothed down her skirt before checking her makeup.

“Sometimes I feel like Alice through the looking glass.” Her mother stated after a deep sigh. “Your changing, then modeling, now signing in Hollywood with an agent. It’s just so bizarre.”

Erika nodded in agreement. “Everything has been happening so fast.”

Once in the limo, Brook smiled at them. “Mr. Winters really likes you. He gave me the company charge card to get your dresses for tomorrow night.”

Erika was as shocked as her mother.

“It means that he has faith in your blossoming career. I have only seen him do this a handful of times.”

“Wow.” It came out breathless.

“That is very generous of him.” Her mother too was in shock.

Brook lowered the window between her and the driver. “Rodeo Drive.” She stated. Then put the partition back up.

“Seriously? Rodeo Drive?” Erika couldn’t believe what she had just heard.

“That’s too much.” Her mother stated. Dillard’s or Nordstrom’s will do.”

“This is Tommy Kincaid’s ball. Therefore Rodeo.” Brook affirmed. “Mr. Winters insisted.”

--o0o—

Once they had purchased their ball gowns, that was when Brook took them to the mall. It was like no mall she had ever been to. Palm trees inside the mall, Huge palm trees, lit with white Christmas lights and sun blaring down through sky lights. It was the middle of winter and girls were wearing shorts, tank tops and flip-flops.

So many different types of people, she’d never seen so many people from so many different races all in one place. Not only were there so many different people, but so many different styles and vibes. Asian girls with blonde hair, Africa-American guys with purple dreads, People with piercings in places she didn’t know could be pierced. It was like she was a little girl actually walking through a tropical fish aquarium. It was all so strange, so colorful and so incredibly wonderful.

Brook seemed not to even notice the unique jungle that she was living in. Could someone actually get tired, bored, of seeing so many individuals?

“That’s the dress.” Erika told her mother.

“Erika’s right.” Brook agreed.

“Are you sure it’s not a bit too daring?” She asked fingering cleavage that hadn’t seen the light of day since she had been dating Erika’s father.

“It’s stunning.” Erika smiled. “And dad will love it too.”

Her mother looked at her reflection in the mirror then at Erika and Brook then let out a long breath. “Okay.”

Brook uncrossed long elegant legs and rose as Erika gave a clap of excitement. She hoped that she could someday be as graceful as Brook. She wondered if she was born with that grace or if it was something that was practiced for hours in front of a mirror.

The women, arms full of various bags headed towards the limo.

“Can we try In-n-Out on the way back to the hotel?” Erika wasn’t too hopeful.

Brook paused mid stride and glanced at Erika. She looked at her watch and then back at Erika. “This is your first trip to Los Angeles, Right?”

Erika nodded.

“Have you ever been to In-n-Out?”

Erika shook her head. So many people at school who had heard about this trip told her that she couldn’t come home without hitting up In-n-Out first.

“If we go there now, you will not be able to eat dinner tonight, and believe me, you’ll want to eat dinner tonight.” Brook bit her lip in concentration. “Tell you what. I’ll make sure you get some tomorrow. We’ll make it the event that it deserves.”

Erika was a bit crestfallen. She didn’t know what it was all about, but so many people hyped it up, she really wanted to give it a try. “Okay.” She shrugged. What could she really do? She was at Brook’s mercy for the next day or two. Not that Brook wasn’t fun. It was just well, she kind of wished that Tricia and Samantha were with her on this trip. Where did that thought come from? She hadn’t really thought of them all day, well, not too much. Now her heart was longing for their company and friendly wit.

By the time they reached the limo, she was bushed. Perhaps a nap instead of In-n Out sounded better. It wouldn’t be much of a nap. She’d have to get ready for their dinner with Mr. Winters. She wanted to look the best she could. He was her manager and he knew a lot of people in Hollywood.

Brook helped them get all of their ‘goods’ up to their room. “I’m leaving you for the night.” She told Erika. “I’ll be here first thing in the morning. Make sure to get some sleep. You are going to have a very busy, full day tomorrow.”

“Thank you Brook.”

“It’s what I get paid for.” She smiled. “It’s a good thing I like my job.”

Erika slipped out of her skirt, heels and lay down on her bed. “God, this feels good.” She told the ceiling. She quickly set the alarm on her phone for one hour before updating her social media. She lay her phone down and closed her eyes.

Erika sat bolt upright wondering where she was, it was bright and smelled different than Constitution.

“Duh.” She told herself rubbing her eyes. “Hollywood.”

She got up and gathered all of her hair into a bun on top of her head before stripping and stepping into the shower. She looked down at her chest wishing the hormones would work faster. She shaved her under arms three times. She didn’t want to have any missed stubble. Tonight, had to be near perfect. Tomorrow night would have to be even more perfect. She decided to shave her legs tonight so that she wouldn’t have to early in the morning.

After drying off, she slipped into a fresh pair of panties and bra. She slid her forms into the bra and checked to make sure they were secure. Her dress wasn’t going to show off her cleavage tonight, so she didn’t have to worry about gluing them down.

She looked at her ball gown hanging at the front of the closet. She was going to kill in that. And those shoes. They were sparkling as if encrusted in diamonds, they were amazing. Samantha would kill to have sparkly shoes as beautiful as those. Erika couldn’t stand having them packed in the box. She pulled them out and set them on the table so that the fading sunlight piercing the blinds hit them and caused her to squint against the glare.

A giggle escaped her lips, startling her. She was giggling over pretty shoes. It was again surreal. Just a few months ago, she was into drawing comics on line and trying to not get pummeled in the halls of school. Tonight, she was giggling over pretty shoes and excited to go to Tommy Kincaid’s ball.

She shook her head and brought her thoughts back to getting ready.

“Okay, they are waiting for us down stairs.” Her mother called, “Are you ready?”

Erika stepped out in a deep purple dress with a long skirt that brushed seductively around her ankles. A shear fabric the same color as the purple covered her shoulders in cap sleeves. It was sexy without showing any skin. She had spent the last. . . . well it seemed like an hour, pinning her extensions up on the back of her head in some semblance of a romantic bun. A few tresses were artfully pulled loose.

Her mother looked up from her purse and gasped.

Erika’s heart stopped. “What’s wrong? Is it horrible?”

“Not at all.” She managed. “Erika.” She paused uncertain what to say. “You look quite stunning.” Her mother took her in from head to toe. A sparkle lit her eyes as she snickered. “Couldn’t resist wearing those shoes?”

Erika looked down. “They are just too pretty.” She bit her lip. “Are they too much?”

Mrs. Martin shook her head. “Not at all. They are indeed very pretty.”

“I figured I may as well start breaking them in for tomorrow night.” Erika added.

Her mother nodded. “I need to send a picture to your father. Hold it.”

Her mother took a few pics and looked at them on her phone. “Wow.” She whispered.

“Send them to me so that I can share with Tricia and Samantha.” Erika instructed.

Hal stood in the lobby of the hotel wearing a very nice light weight suit. Erika was suddenly glad she wasn’t ever expected to wear suit again. They were so uncomfortable.

Mr. Winters tucked his phone into his pocket and smiled at them. “Well, you two look lovely.”

Erika felt that he meant it and blushed. When she realized that his words had that effect she felt confused. Part of her was excited and held her head higher. She had a longing to please this man, but the other part of her was embarrassed that she felt that way.

Mr. Winters waited for them to get into the limo before he joined them. “Did you have a good time with Brook?” he asked.

“Yes, she is wonderful.” Erika smiled.

Mr. Winters nodded.

After a twenty-minute drive with small talk and Erika’s attention getting sucked out the window at the new to her scenery, they arrived at the restaurant. A valet helped her out of the car. She couldn’t help notice that he had given her more than a quick look before smiling and releasing her hand.

The salt air was a tang in her nose, a spice against the warmed concrete and other unfamiliar scents. Lit fountains near the door of the restaurant added an undertone of chlorine. It wasn’t unpleasant, but decidedly Los Angeles.

“You may see some celebs in here.” Mr. Winters told her. “You can smile at them, but they come here to eat in peace.”

Erika nodded. Celebs? Here at this restaurant? If I’m dreaming, don’t wake me. She thought.

She felt the large hand of Mr. Winters lightly on the small of her back guiding through the doors. Large windows overlooking the Pacific Ocean were set in the wall opposite of them. The orange sun was darkening the scattered clouds to a fiery red.

“Wow.” Escaped Erika’s lips.

“Hmm?” Mr. Winters questioned.

“I’ve never seen the sunset of the Pacific.” She couldn’t take her eyes off of the colorful view. “Are they always like this?”

“Most of the time.” Mr. Winters nodded. “I guess I’ve become accustomed to them. They are pretty.”

Erika felt her mother’s hand grasp hers. She gave a Erika a loving squeeze before giving her a light tug to signal that they needed to follow the hostess.

--o0o—

Erika slipped off her pretty shoes and carefully set them on the table. They sure were pretty. They did hurt after a couple of hours, but she felt the pain was worth it.

She hardly noticed anything at the restaurant until after the sun had fully set and the sky became dark. That was a magical sunset and all she wanted was Tricia beside her enjoying it with her.

She slipped out of her dress and hung it up. She had caught the eye of more than one guy and that of a woman or two as well. She wondered if it was the dress or her. Did it matter? She began taking the bobby pins out of her hair. Once down, she scratched at her scalp and ran her fingers through the long dark hair.

A yawn stopped her in her tracks. She needed to get to bed. Brook had warned her that it was going to be busy tomorrow. Was it tomorrow yet? She looked at her phone. With her body still in her old time zone it was.

She didn’t recognize any celebs while they ate, but her mom gushed about seeing a singer that she had crushed on and some soap star having dinner with her husband. It was kind of disappointing that she hadn’t recognized anyone, but she figured the roles would be reversed at the ball.

Erika made sure to set her alarm and lay down, quickly losing awareness of the world as darkness took her.