Eden's Reality

A small 14 year old boy plans on escaping his abusive father and the house where he grew up in by moving to a boarding school with his two best friends, but on the night before he leaves he stumbles across something that changes his life, and his body, forever

(All feedback is appreciated!)

Chapter 1

A plump koala stared blankly at me from the other side of the branch, slowly chewing on its eucalyptus leaf and scratching its filth-covered back. Every now and then it’d grunt with pleasure and stop chewing, its eyes misting over with what I could only assume was pleasure, but after a while it’d shake its head and go back to munching. Its white-grey fur was matted with dirt and there were bare patches around its back and stomach, making me suspect that it was either old or diseased.

‘Well, this was a gigantic waste of time.’ I muttered as I ran my hands through my blonde hair, dislodging a clump of bark that had gotten stuck in it. ‘I almost died climbing up here, you know. You could at least pretend to show some interest in me.’

The koala grunted with pleasure and its eyes glossed over so I sighed and looked down to where the ground was, some hundred meters away. I was in a gigantic eucalyptus tree deep in the woods bordering my parent’s farm, and all around me were similar trees brimming with fresh leaves blowing gently in the cool breeze. Normally I wouldn’t climb up this high because my small body wasn’t all that strong, but I’d heard the sounds of the koala grunting as I’d passed by and my imagination had gone wild. Could that sound be a cute possum with some adorable little baby possums? Or a large stray cat looking for a friend? Or maybe even a huge lizard that might let me pat it!

But, no. It was just an obese Koala with a skin infection. Great.

‘At least you’re happy, I guess.’ I said and smiling slightly. I ran my hands through my long hair again and pushed it behind my ears, enjoying not having to worry about how I looked. Usually I’d keep it down over my right side to hide the brown birth mark that streaked down my right cheek, but out here in the forest I didn’t have to worry about what people thought of how I looked. ‘To be honest though I was kinda hoping you were a possum. You’re…kinda cute in your own way I guess but possums are heaps cuter! They’re like the cats of the marsupial world. Mrrow! Meow!’

The koala continued to stare at me with its empty eyes, not caring in the slightest about anything I had to say, so I kept meowing at it. It was strangely cathartic and I didn’t exactly have anything better to do until my energy returned.

‘Eden?’ a voice called from the ground and I looked down to see Reece squinting up at me through the branches. He wasn’t hard to miss, being far taller than the average sixteen year-old and well on the way to adulthood. Today was our last day of freedom before we went to our new school so he’d joined me on my woodland adventure, along with my other best friend Alexis. We’d been hanging out by the creek but I’d wandered off and ended up here.

‘Reece!’ I called back down and smiled at him, although it was unlikely he saw it. ‘You found me!’

‘I did! What are you doing up there?’

‘I thought I saw something interesting.’ I called down and scowled at the koala, which was joyfully scratching its butt. ‘But I was wrong!’

‘Well get down! You shouldn’t be up that high!’ Reece said. ‘It’s not safe.’

‘Meow!’

‘W-what?’

‘Nothing. I’m coming down now.’ I sighed and slipped myself over to the side of the branch. While I wasn’t very tall or strong, I’d been climbing trees since I’d been able to walk on my own so I wasn’t too worried about getting down. It helped that I was wearing a pair of thick baggy jeans and a long-sleeved blue shirt too, which protect my skin from the trees jagged bark.

‘Reece?’ another voice said and Alexis walked next to him. She wasn’t as tall as Reece so I couldn’t make her out properly, but her spiky black hair was unmistakable. She’d had it cut and styled in the image of one of her favourite artists and it looked really good on her. ‘Where’s Eden?’

‘He’s up there.’ Reece pointed at me and Alexis gasped.

‘Oh god! Eden! Get down from there!’ she cried and I saw her pretty face crease in concern.

‘Meow! I’m fine!’

‘No you’re not! That’s the tree with the spiders in it, remember?’ she shouted and my stomach plummeted.

‘Oh my god!’ I gasped and stared at the thick layer of bark covering the tree. Bark that spiders loved to live under. Holy crap! I’d been so focused on seeing that stupid koala that I’d completely forgotten!

I pushed myself off the edge of the branch and onto the one below, wincing as bark crunched under my sneakers. No spiders revealed themselves though so I continued to make my way down the tree. It was large, thick and old, so I wasn’t too worried about any branches giving way under my slight weight. My panic gave me the energy I needed to be able to quickly scale down the tree.

I made it halfway before a spider appeared. I’d grabbed onto the trunk for more support getting down and it’d crumbled under my grip, revealing a thick circle of webbing and four dead huntsmen grouped together. There was a fifth one, larger than the dead ones and much darker with a reddish-black abdomen, and when it saw me it immediately raised its front legs. It seemed to be a huntsman but I didn’t exactly have the time to study it.

‘Shit!’ I screamed and jerked backwards. My feet slipped on the bark underneath me and I tumbled over the edge of the branch. For a horrifying moment I fell through the air and my heart froze, but I flailed out with my arms and managed to grab onto a smaller branch near me. Pain tore through my arm as my body’s descent was suddenly halted and I screamed, old scars on my wrist tearing open, but I somehow managed to hold on. The branch groaned under my weight and bark showered down onto me, but it somehow didn’t break. I looked down to try and find a place to drop but there wasn’t anything directly below, and while there was a decently-sized branch jutting out to the side I’d have to swing to get to it and my arm wasn’t in any shape to do so.

‘Shit! Are you okay?’ Alexis called up and I gave an affirmative growl of pain. I tried to swing my dangling arm up and onto the branch but I couldn’t muster the energy, having reached my limit.

‘Hold on! I’m coming up!’ Reece cried and I looked down to see him scaling the tree. I was still far too high up for comfort and I closed my eyes as my head swam.

‘Be careful!’ I said as I heard Reece’s feet cracking against the bark. ‘You’re heaps heavier than me, I don’t know if some of the branches can take your weight.’

‘It’ll be fine. Just keep an eye out for spiders.’

‘Okay!’ I did as he said, and froze as I saw the horrible spider from before crawling down the trunk towards me, its front legs still held high. What the hell! ‘Holy crap! You asshole!’

‘What?’ Alexis asked.

‘The spider’s chasing me!’ I cried as it crept closer, its dark eyes shining with hatred. ‘And it’s pissed!’

‘Can you get over here?’ Reece asked and I saw him standing on the branch diagonally beneath me, his arms outstretched.

‘I don’t know! My arm is really sore!’ I said and looked back to where the spider was. ‘Uhm! But I can try! Do you think I’ll die if I miss and fall from this height?’

Reece looked down and then shrugged. ‘Yeah, probably. But you’re not going to fall, I’m going to catch you.’

A strained whimper escaped my lips. ‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes! Now come on!’

‘I-dammit! Okay!’ I gasped, seeing the spider a few centimetres from my hand. ‘I’m coming now!’

I swung back and forth a couple of times to get some momentum and then let go, flying towards Reece at a faster pace than I expected. He didn’t waver though and easily caught me in his arms, absorbing the impact with his legs.

‘I got you!’ he said triumphantly, placing me down next to him and brushing his black hair clear from his eyes. His face was broad and handsome, with the beginnings of a light moustache lining his top lip and making him look rather more mature than he actually was. His eyes were youthful though, a dark hazel that shone kindly whenever he smiled.

‘You saved me!’ I cried and threw my arms around him. He was so tall though that I only managed to reach his shoulders. ‘You’re amazing!’

‘Yeah, I know.’ he grinned. ‘Always saving your ass, huh?’

‘Mm!’ I beamed. I’d first met Reece in year seven when he’d saved me from a psychotic plover that hadn’t liked my attempts to hug it, and we’d become friends a few days later when I’d gotten stuck on the gym roof trying to catch a dragonfly and he’d carried me down to safety. He’d proclaimed himself my bodyguard after that and had proceeded to do his best to keep me out of trouble, which hadn’t gone as well as he’d hoped.

‘Jesus!’ he whistled, looking past me. ‘That’s one huge huntsman.’

I spun around and saw the spider glaring down at us from the branch I’d just vacated, unable to get down to us.

‘Hah! Screw you!’ I made a rude gesture at it and grinned triumphantly. ‘You failed, you stupid jerk! No gross spider’s going to be killing me today!’

‘If that really is a huntsman then it wouldn’t have killed you.’ Alexis said from below us. ‘Their bites just hurt and give you a headache, remember? They’re not lethal.’

I deflated a bit. ‘W-well, that’s true but, it could crawl into my mouth and bite my stomach!’

‘It…could, yes…’ Alexis said slowly. ‘That’s pretty unlikely though.’

‘This one was planning to do it! I can see it in its eyes!’ I said and the spider raised its front legs again. ‘See!’

‘Wouldn’t it die in your stomach acid though?’ Reece asked.

‘It’s prepared to die to kill me!’

‘I don’t th-fuck!’ Reece cried, scooping me up in his arms and placing me on his back. I squeaked in surprise and tried to get down but he held me steady. ‘Don’t! The spider’s gonna jump!’

‘What! It can’t get over here!’ I said, grabbing him around the neck. ‘It’s a –holy crap!’

The spider squished itself down on the log and then rocketed off, flying towards us like some kind of tiny skeletal possum.

Reece jumped down to a lower branch and carefully lowered himself down to another, not at all hampered by my weight. The spider landed exactly where we’d been and then jumped again after a couple of seconds.

Reece got to the lowest branch and tapped my back, so I slipped off and landed safely onto the soft grassy undergrowth. He jumped down next to me and then spun around to look back at the branch he’d just vacated. The spider had just missed us, landing with an uncomfortably audible squish, and crawled to the edge of the branch to stare down at us. It didn’t make a move to jump again though and I relaxed, assuming that it had just wanted to scare me out of the tree.

‘Whoa! That’s not a huntsman!’ Alexis said, coming up next to us. She was half-Japanese and almost as tall as Reece but not as large. Her short, styled hair framed her round face and helped make her light blue eyes shine. She was similar clothes to me, thick jeans and a long-sleeved red shirt, but she also had a pair of silver studs in her large ears and a short gold chain around her neck.

‘What is it then?’ I asked and looked at her as she frowned in thought. Alexis knew far more about animals and insects than I did, despite her living in the city. She loved exploring the wilderness just as much as I did and sketching the many creatures we uncovered.

‘I don’t know. Is it some kind of tarantula?’ she scratched her head thoughtfully. ‘It kinda looks like a funnel-web but they don’t live in trees.’

‘Well, whatever it is, it’s going to die.’ Reece said, picking up a fallen branch from the undergrowth.

‘Wait!’ Alexis and I gasped at the same time.

Reece frowned at us. ‘What? Why? It chased us all the way down here!’

‘Yeah, but it doesn’t seem to care now that we’re out of the tree.’ I pointed out. ‘And it’s got every right to be angry with me, I did accidentally destroy its home. Murdering it after that would just be mean.’

‘It tried to kill you!’

‘Mm, but I’m not dead so it’s okay!’ I beamed.

‘It’s really cruel to kill spiders we find outside.’ Alexis said, grabbing hold of the stick Reece was brandishing. ‘It’d be like breaking into someone’s home and then shooting them in the face for being ugly.’

He grimaced for a moment and then relented, letting Alexis take the stick from him. ‘Fine. Let’s just get out of here then. It’s creeping me out, just sitting there staring at us.’

‘Good idea.’ Alexis said, taking out her iPhone. ‘I just want to take a photo so I can look it up later.’

‘Are you going to sketch it when we get home?’ I asked her and she nodded.

‘Yep! I think I left one of my sketch pads at your place last week?’

‘You did! The one with the drawings of those super cute baby ducks we saw at the creek.’ I smiled at the memory. ‘I wish they’d have been there today.’

‘They’ve probably all grown up by now.’ Reece said and I nodded sadly. Ducks just weren’t as cute as ducklings. ‘Anyway, come on. It’s starting to get dark and I don’t want to be anywhere near that spider at night.’

Alexis finished taking her photos and we began heading off, a cool breeze rustling the multitude of leaves around us. I stopped for a moment and smiled at the spider. ‘You were much more exciting than that koala! Thanks for not making my trip a giant waste of time.’

It stared at me for a moment and then raised its front legs in what almost looked like a gesture of goodbye. I grinned at it and waved back, then blinked as I realised there was blood on my hand. I pulled up my sleeve and saw that some of the old cuts on my wrist had indeed been torn open when I’d grabbed onto the branch, and blood was slowly leaking out of them. It…hurt…

Nobody will know if you’re dead. You can’t hurt anyone if you’re dead.

I flinched and angrily rubbed them against the back of my jeans, then slipped my sleeve back up and hurried after Reece and Alexis.

It’ll only hurt for a moment.

I caught up to my friends at an offshoot of the creek, one that cut through the woods and led to my house. The woods we were in were quite large and I’d never managed to make it out the other side and see what was there, although according to mum there was just a large highway and some factories. Nothing I was particularly interested in.

‘It feels so weird, knowing this was my last day here.’ I said as I jumped along a row of rocks next to the creek bank. ‘The holidays went by really fast.’

‘They did, but I’m so excited!’ Alexis said, walking a few paces behind me with Reece. ‘We finally get to go to Sanders after all this time!’

I shrugged and continued hopping from rock to rock. We’d all applied and been accepted into Sanders Grammar, a private boarding school that had the reputation of being one of the best in the country for aspiring athletes to attend. Reece had enrolled so he could join the basketball team and train under their coach but Alexis and I were more interested in the electives the school offered. While the school was primarily known for its sports it also had a large focus on the arts as well, offering some electives that few other schools in the area did. Alexis was interested in their biology and digital media classes, hoping to increase her knowledge about wildlife and improve her photography skills, whereas I was captivated by their cartooning course.

I’d loved visual storytelling ever since mum had read me storybooks at bedtime when I was a child, but my interest had truly blossomed when she’d bought me a massive Introduction to Comics compendium for my seventh birthday. It had showcased a huge variety of different graphic novel styles, from the superhero genre to the abstract, and I’d spent the next couple of years pouring over it and buying all books it suggested within.

I’d tried to create my own comics but my drawings skills were pretty bad and I wasn’t all that good at scriptwriting or planning ahead, so the chance to actually study was one of the most amazing things I could imagine.

Plus, it meant that I could finally escape from here, and I’d jump at that opportunity even if it didn’t come with a cartooning course.

‘I’m excited too.’ I said after a moment, jumping off the rocks to walk next to Reece. ‘I’m just not sure what to expect. I hope the person who teaches the cartooning class is nice, I wish I’d got to meet them when I was there.’

‘Same! I wish I’d gotten to see Leons when I was there.’ Reece said wistfully, referring to the basketball coach he was hoping to play under. ‘Did you know he makes individual training schedules for all of his players? How awesome is that?! It’s like what the pro coaches do to their players, in the NBA. It’s going to be so amazing! ’

‘You have to try out to get on the team though, don’t you? Do you think it’ll be hard?’ I asked, scratching my sore arm.

‘It’ll be hard, yeah, but I think it’ll be fine.’ Reece grinned. ‘You know how good I am.’

‘What happens if you don’t though?’ Alexis asked. ‘What’ll you do then?’

‘Ehh.’ he shrugged. ‘I’ll still have two more years after this one to join. Even just having him coach me for one year is enough to put me on the fast track to go pro.’

‘Have you been training then?’ Alexis asked and he blushed slightly.

‘Y-yeah…a little bit. I’ve been having these special protein shakes every morning and night, they’re supposed to help you put on weight that’ll turn into muscle mass or something.’ He scratched the back of his head. ‘I don’t know if they’re working to be honest, but I do feel stronger. I think.’

‘That’s your training?’ Alexis smirked. ‘Drinking two protein shakes a day?’

‘It’s better than nothing.’ Reece said defensively. ‘A-’

‘Can I try one?’ I cut in eagerly. ‘I want to join the basketball team too! Do you they’d make me bigger?’

‘Ah...’ Reece looked down at me, his expression softening. ‘I don’t know Eden…I don’t think they’d do much for you.’

‘Why not?’

‘Aren’t you supposed to stick to the meal plan your doctor gave you?’ Alexis asked. ‘You probably shouldn’t drink some weird protein shake just in case it messes with it.’

I grimaced and stopped walking, frustration starting to rise up in me. For a long time now, since I was six, my body had been struggling to develop properly. Due to various…events…in my childhood I had grown slower than most other kids my age. Mum had tried to take me to a doctor but dad had constantly refused, asserting that all I needed was to work hard on the farm and eat lots of meat.

Things got worse though and I ended up in hospital last year, where I finally got to see a doctor. After a lot of physical and mental inspections he suggested that I see a child psychologist, amongst other things.

Unsurprisingly…dad refused to let me see them! So instead the doctor created a meal plan for me in the hopes that eating healthily and regularly would kick-start my body’s development.

It had kind of worked in that I was able to concentrate more on schoolwork and I began to develop stronger muscles in my upper body, but I was still small and had trouble putting on weight. The doctor had said that when I eventually hit puberty I’d start growing, but I had no idea when that would be and neither did he.

The doctor had wanted to do follow-ups and take blood tests but dad had only let me see him once, so I hadn’t gotten the chance to learn what was going on with my body. As it was, right now I was fourteen but I looked like I was ten and as far as I knew I hadn’t started puberty yet.

‘Eden?’ Alexis asked and I jumped, realising that I’d fallen silent for a while.

‘Yes! Sorry!’ I said and hurried over to where they were waiting. ‘What were you saying?’

‘Your meal plan.’

‘Oh. Yeah.’ I shrugged. ‘I guess I probably shouldn’t add a weird protein shake into the mix.’

‘They’re not weird. They’re just healthy.’ Reece muttered. ‘Definitely nothing like that disgusting meaty casserole stew thing your dad used to make you eat.’

I shivered at the memory. ‘Oh god. Don’t remind me about that. I used to throw that up every time he made it for me.’

‘I threw it up too when he made me have some.’ Reece said, shivering as well. ‘He is seriously the worst.’

Alexis made a disgusted expression. ‘Ugh. Is he going to be home tonight?

‘No! He’s at some livestock festival and won’t be back until late. He won’t even be here for dinner!’ I beamed. ‘Are you still staying for it? Mum’s making us roast chicken!’

‘Ooh! I’m definitely staying for that.’ Alexis looked at Reece. ‘What about you?’

‘I can’t. My parents are throwing this going away barbecue for me tonight.’ he said with a smile. ‘Most of my family’s going to be there and we had a guy around to clean the pool last week so we can finally use it again.’

‘Wow. That’s pretty cool.’ Alexis said, sounding slightly jealous.

‘Yeah. Dad never misses a chance to celebrate.’ Reece grinned. ‘It’s going to be really fun.’

‘If my parents did something like that for me I’d make it much harder to leave them.’ Alexis said and he nodded.

‘It’s…yeah…leaving is actually a lot harder than I thought it would be.’ He admitted. ‘I think I’m going to get homesick pretty fast.’

‘You’ll be able to go home on weekends and term breaks.’ Alexis smiled.

‘And you’ll have me as your roommate!’ I said excitedly and pulled on his arm. ‘Remember what you said? We’re gonna play board games every night and eat heaps of chocolate and soft drink!’

‘That’s right!’ Reece said and patted me on the head. ‘It won’t be so bad with you around.’

‘I don’t think junk food is going to help with your meal plan, Eden.’ Alexis frowned.

‘The doctor said that it was okay in moderation, so long as it helps me put on weight.’

‘Every night isn’t moderation. You’ll get sick, Eden.’

‘I will?’ I asked worriedly and she nodded. ‘W-what about every second night then?’

‘Nu-uh! We’re going to have board-game and chocolate parties every night!’ Reece laughed and grinned at Alexis. ‘And you’ll be in the girls dorm so you can’t do anything about it.’

‘She can come and join us!’ I said but Reece shook his head.

‘No she can’t. Girls aren’t allowed in the boys dorm and vice versa.’

‘What? Why not?’

Reece raised an eyebrow. ‘Because the staff are worried about students fooling around, amongst other things.’

‘Fooling around?’

‘Se-’ Reece started saying but Alexis cut him off with a sharp gesture, making him jerk guiltily. ‘Oh! Shit! Sorry!’

‘What?’ I asked in confusion.

‘Don’t worry about it.’ Alexis said quickly. ‘It’s not really important.’

‘I don’t und-’

‘What do you want to do when we get back to your place?’ she asked over me. ‘I was thinking that after I sketch the spider we could do some drawings together? Maybe finish off that comic we were making about the lost kitten?’

I gasped. It was ridiculously obvious that she was deliberately changing the subject but there was no way I could resist her offer. We’d been working on the kitten comic for nearly a year and never got around to finishing it, and I wasn’t about to pass up the chance to finally get it done.

‘Yes! Yes!’ I said and impulsively hugged her. ‘You know what we should do? When we finish it we should get mum to make a copy for us and put them up in our dorm rooms!’

‘That’s a great idea!’ Alexis said, her eyes shining. ‘I want to colour it then! Do you think we’ll have enough time for that? I want to redo the first scene too, and add the kitten’s mum in so…’

Alexis and I lost ourselves in the beautiful world of comics and Reece walked alongside us, every now and then commenting on something we’d said but not really following the conversation.

 

Chapter 2

The woods eventually thinned out and led into a large grassy paddock where my dad kept most of his cows, large black angus that spent their lives wandering around and devouring grass. They were about as exciting as the koala had been and we didn’t pay much attention to them as we passed, nor they us, but I did glare at a particularly large one that almost bowled me over as it lumbered over to the water trough. I tried to angrily shove it away but ended up slipping over and splatting against its side, much to Reece and Alexis’s amusement. The cow hadn’t even noticed.

We reached my house just as the last strands of light started to fade. It was nestled between an old shearing shed and another paddock for the bulls, and had a small front yard that was pretty much just a square dirt patch. The house itself was a two-storey monstrosity that was over a hundred years old. My dad’s great-great-grandparents had built it when they’d begun breeding cattle and it’d been passed down through the West family ever since. It had originally been made out of red bricks and concrete but had been renovated and repaired so many times over the years that it was now a hodgepodge of random materials. Thick brown timber had been used to replace sections of the walls that had been weakened over the years and white clay was used to replace any single bricks that had crumbled or come loose. The majority of the right side of the house had had collapsed during a heavy storm and had been replaced with a limestone wall for some reason, and nobody had bothered to place windows in it.

‘Alright. I’m gonna head off.’ Reece said as he slammed the cows rusty paddock gate shut behind us. ‘I’ll catch the bus at the end of the road, th-.’

‘Oh! You don’t have to do that.’ I said and ran in front of him. ‘You should ask mum to drive you home, I’m sure she’d be happy to.’

‘Nah, it’s okay. I want to chill out with some music on the way home.’ he said and ruffled my hair, knocking a twig out of it. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow! We’re meeting outside the school at three, okay? Don’t be late!’

‘I won’t! Mum’s going to drive me down so everything’s going to be fine. We’re having lunch together and she’s going to buy me a soft toy possum to keep me company!’ I beamed. ‘But if I am late don’t decorate the room until I get there, you promised that we’d do it together!’

‘I know, I haven’t forgotten. Don’t stress.’ He smiled and looked at Alexis. ‘Do you know who your roommate is going to be yet?’

‘No.’ she said with a small grimace. ‘I have no idea who I’m going to be living with.’

‘Awh, well I’m sure it’ll be fine.’ he said. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow too, yeah? Or if not then definitely on Monday.’

‘Yep! Seeya then!’

‘Bye Reece!’ I said and hugged him. ‘I hope you enjoy your party.’

‘I always do.’ He grinned and then walked off; waving at us before disappearing behind a row of large hedges that lined the road.

‘Right!’ Alexis said and began walking to the front door. ‘Let’s get to work!’

‘Aye!’ I hurried after her. ‘I’ll have to wash myself first though, and I’m really hungry! Did you want something to eat? Mum bought me these amazing biscuits, the have marshmallow in the middle and sprinkles on top!’

‘That sounds good to me!’ she said and pulled open the rusting wire door.

The inside of the house was in stark contrast to the outside: the wooden floorboards were finely polished, the cream walls perfectly maintained and the ceiling only had a couple of cracks in it. Mum and I loved collecting old paintings and we’d lined most of the walls with our findings. The majority of them were of animals we both loved, such as lambs, kittens and crabs, but there were a few scenery paintings as well, depicting lush forests and beautiful oceans.

Most of the furniture was very old, probably as old as the house, and it gave the house a very archaic feeling. The only really recent purchases were the massive TV in the living room dad had bought to watch football on and all of the black couches in there. Dad liked to have friends over to watch sports and wanted the room to be as presentable as possible.

‘Eden? Is that you?’ mums voice called from the kitchen and I skipped past Alexis down to the end of the long entrance hallway.

‘Hi mum!’ I said as I bounced into the kitchen, where she was in the middle of cutting up some vegetables. There were two large windows on the opposite side of the room and the last of the sun’s rays were shining through, illuminating the white tiles and making the kitchen seem to almost glow.

‘Hey munchkin!’ she smiled, putting down the knife and coming over to me. She was tall, like everyone else in my family, and had flowing blonde hair similar to mine, just slightly lighter. Her face was soft and petite but had a hardness about it that was intensified whenever she got angry. We slightly resembled each other as I’d inherited her blue eyes and thin eyebrows, but my large nose and thin lips belonged to dad. ‘How was your last day?’

I considered telling her about the spider and how I’d almost fallen to my death, but decided that was a pretty bad idea so just smiled happily. ‘It was great! Nothing dangerous happened at all! I’m fine!’

‘That’s a suspicious way of putting it.’ Mum said, her eyes narrowing.

‘N-no it’s not!’ I said just as Alexis walked in. ‘Look! Alexis is here!’

‘I am! Hey Mrs West!’ she said, a bright smile lighting up her face. ‘How are you?’

‘I’m good thanks Alexis.’ Mum returned the smile, making Alexis’s cheeks redden slightly. ‘How are you?’

‘I-I’m good too!’ Alexis said, somewhat awkwardly. She’d been acting weird around mum for quite a while now and I wasn’t sure why. ‘You look really good today. Are those new clothes?’

‘They are! I’m surprised you noticed.’ Mum said and patted her sides. She was wearing a pair of black shorts and a likewise black tank top underneath her usual white cooking apron. Mum had a slim, curvy body so the clothes did make her look good but I hadn’t really noticed and was surprised Alexis had. ‘I bought them yesterday to replace the dress that someone cut up to get materials for a pair of gloves.’

I blushed as mum glared at me. ‘I said I was sorry! I thought it was a rag!’

‘I wore that dress all the time!’

‘I didn’t recognize it!’

‘How could you not recognize it?’

‘I don’t pay attention to what you wear!’

‘Why were you trying to make gloves?’ Alexis laughed.

‘Oh! I forgot to tell you!’ I said excitedly. ‘I found a bunch of super-cute little frogs in a muddy pond in the back paddock and I wanted to play with them, but I was scared I was going to get warts so I needed protection!’

‘Frogs don’t give you warts.’ Alexis said. ‘Who told you that?’

‘His father.’ Mum muttered darkly.

‘He was wrong though! I didn’t manage to make gloves so I just played with them bare-handed and my hands are fine, see?’ I held them up to show Alexis my wart-free hands.

‘So you ruined my dress for nothing.’ Mum sighed and I blushed again.

‘I’m really sorry! I wouldn’t have cut them up if I had of know it was yours.’

‘Next time ask me before you decided to cut something up, okay? I don’t want to lose any more of my favourite clothes.’

‘I will. I promise.’ I said solemnly and mum put a hand on the shoulder.

‘I hope you keep that promise.’ she said and her grip on my shoulder tightened, ‘Because if you cut another hole in one of my dresses then I’m going to cut a hole in you, understand?’

‘Y-yes.’ I swallowed. ‘I understand.’

‘Good boy!’ she smiled and released my shoulder. ‘Now, where’s Reece? Is he still outside?’

‘Oh, he had to go home so he went to the bus stop.’ Alexis answered.

‘He caught the bus? I’d have been happy to give him a ride home.’

‘I know! I said you would be!’ I said sadly. ‘He wanted to have alone time on the bus with his music though.’

‘Ah. That’s understandable. I imagine he won’t be getting much alone time in the coming months.’ Mum said and patted my cheeks. ‘He’s going to be sharing a room with you, after all.’

‘Yeah!’ I beamed. ‘We’re going to be together all the time!’

‘Are you going to stay for dinner?’ mum asked Alexis. ‘I’m making a whole chicken so there’s plenty to go around.’

‘I’d love to stay! My parents are going to pick me up around eight though…’

‘I should have dinner ready by then so that’s fine.’ Mum smiled. ‘Now, I picked up some muffins on the way home. Would you two like some?’

‘Yes please!’ Alexis said loudly. ‘I haven’t eaten since breakfast.’

‘What are they?’ I asked warily, scared that they might have something horrible in them like blueberries or raisins.

‘Chocolate banana.’ Mum said and looked me over as I clapped my hands in excitement. ‘You need to have a shower and change into some clean clothes before you eat though. You’re covered in dirt and grass and…other things.’

‘Do I have to?’ I asked and mum frowned at me. ‘Okay! Fine. I’ll be back in a minute!’

I hurried off towards the stairs that led up to the second floor. It was where my bedroom was, along with an office where I did my homework and my own personal bathroom. It pretty much belonged to me and was one of the few places in the house where I felt truly safe. That probably had something to do with the fact that my bedroom could be safely locked from the inside.

I walked into the bathroom and threw off my clothes, then looked in the mirror to check for any stray spiders. It wasn’t a good idea for me to stare at my naked body too long, especially my lower half, so I made sure to inspect myself as quickly as possible. I’d gotten relatively used to the cuts along my wrist but the ones on my waist and thighs still upset me if I caught sight of them, so I refused to look down there most of the time.

I shot a quick glance at my upper body and to my surprise actually found something that shouldn’t be there, the small red and black corpse of a ladybug.

‘Owh.’ I said sadly and gently picked it up. ‘Where’d you come from? I hope I didn’t kill you.’

I looked at its red, unmoving body for a moment in the hopes that it wasn’t dead, but I noticed a large hole in its back, probably caused by a spiders bite. It was weird that it wasn’t webbed though, but maybe it’d fallen out of one when I’d scrambled out of the tree.

‘Sorry little buddy.’ I put it in the sink and washed it away. ‘I hope your death wasn’t too painful.’

I watched it wash away, turned off the facet and then screamed as I saw someone standing behind me in the mirror’s reflection.

‘Oh god! What the hell!’

Jon was standing behind me!

‘What are you doing in here by yourself, little girl?’ he asked softly, a smile lighting up his messily unshaven face. He put a thick arm around my shoulders and leant down to kiss the side of my face, while his other hand rubbed my stomach and fell lower…and lower… ‘Were you waiting to see me?’

‘No!’ I threw myself backwards in an attempt to shove him off of me, but I instead just crashed into the ground. I cried out in confusion and crawled backwards against the wall as my head spun and dark lines streaked across my vision. ‘Don’t touch me!’

I could feel his cold hands, grabbing me, pulling me…going into my mouth, thickening as they went down and cut off my breathing. I clutched at my throat and started gasping for air, feeling like I was choking.

‘Struggling will only make it worse.’ Jon’s voice came from somewhere above me. ‘You should know that by now. Just let it in. It’ll make you feel real good one day. Just like a real girl.’

‘Get off me! Get off-’ I screamed and then my stomach erupted in pain as his fist rammed into it. I gagged and fell over, the contents of my stomach spewing out of my mouth and onto the clothes I’d just discarded. I pushed myself away from it, and then screamed again as Jon’s hands grabbed my shoulder. ‘No! No! GET OFF ME!’

‘Eden! It’s me!’ mum’s voice broke over my cries and she turned me around to face her. ‘Calm down! It’s okay! It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you.’

‘Oh my god!’ Relief flooded through me and I dived into her. ‘Mum! Jon was here!’

‘No he wasn’t.’ she said and pushed me back a bit so she could look me in the eye.

‘Yes he was! He was right there!’ I cried and pointed to the sink. ‘He touched me! He…’

‘No one was here, Eden.’ Mum said calmly. ‘You’re seeing things again.’

‘I wasn’t! He was here, I felt him! His hands and…and him! I felt him!’ I shouted. ‘He was real! I’m not lying!’

‘I’m not saying you are, but there was nobody else in here.’ Mum pushed my hair behind my ears and smiled sadly. ‘This has happened before, sweetie. I know it felt real but it wasn’t, I saw you struggling just before you threw up. You were alone.’

‘I…but…’ I gestured weakly at the sink again.

‘It wasn’t real. You were imagining him again.’

Again? Again…

A-oh. Oh.

This had happened before. Like once a month since I’d gotten out of hospital last year. I should have remembered but…I’d gotten lost in the panic and had forgotten. Again. Just like what always happened.

Jon hadn’t been here. I’d imagined him.

Crap.

My face flushed as reality crashed down onto me. I was clutching to mum while naked and there was a pool of vomit behind me. The fear drained out of my body and was replaced with pure shame. Such a familiar feeling these days.

‘Oh…’ I pulled away from her and covered my lap with my arms. ‘I’m s-sorry.’

‘You don’t have to apologise.’ Mum said softly. ‘Have you calmed down now?’

‘Yeah. C-can you turn away for a moment?’ I asked and she thankfully did so, letting me grab a towel and cover myself up. I looked mournfully at my tainted clothes and grimaced. ‘I threw up…’

‘I’ll clean it up, don’t worry.’

‘I’m really sorry.’ I said miserably.

‘Don’t be.’ Mum turned around and looked as miserable as I did. ‘I know you can’t help it. You’re still hurting.’

‘I’m…’ I trailed off, not wanting to admit that I actually was hurting but feeling like it was pointless to deny it.

Mum smiled and put a hand to my cheek. ‘Do you remember me suggesting that you see one of the councillors at Sanders?’

I squirmed uncomfortably. ‘I do.’

‘Are you going to?’

‘W-well, I’m going to see one the doctors there like you said! I know that’s really important.’

‘So is seeing a councillor.’ Mum said patiently. ‘You need to be talking to someone about what happened, otherwise incidents like this will keep happening.’

‘I can’t talk to a stranger about… this stuff.’ I finished unevenly, the very thought making me uncomfortable.

‘You can’t talk to me about it either though.’ Mum said and the raised her hand as I began to speak. ‘And I understand why, don’t worry! God, if something like that happened to me the last person I’d want to speak to about it would be my mother. But you need to be speaking to someone, and the councillors at Sanders are supposed to be very good. Plus, everything is confidential so your father won’t find out, and even if he somehow does he won’t be able to do anything about it.’

Her voice hardened as she finished and I decided that it wouldn’t be a good idea to disagree with her, so I nodded. ‘Okay. I’ll…look into it.’

‘Thankyou.’ Mum smiled and hugged me. ‘I promise you Eden, it will help so much having someone to talk to, someone who you can trust but don’t see all the time. Like a friend that y-’

‘Ah! Alexis!’ I gasped, suddenly remembering that my friend was in the house. I looked past mum to see if she was watching from the doorway but it was empty. ‘Where is she?’

‘I told her to stay downstairs when we heard you cry out.’ Mum said gently. ‘Don’t worry, she understands.’

‘Ah…’ Alexis had seen me like this on more than a few occasions, much to my shame. It was so much more embarrassing to have her clam me down and comfort me than it was mum. Alexis was only two years older than me, I shouldn’t be burdening her with this kind of stuff. ‘I should go see her.’

‘Are you okay to have a shower now then?’ mum asked and I grimaced, hoping she’d let me off from having one. I really didn’t want to be alone in this room again.

‘Uhm…’

‘If something happens I’ll be right downstairs, okay?’ she said and hugged me tighter. ‘And I’ll send Alexis up with some muffins and a can of coke.’

‘Oh!’ I perked up a bit at that last part.

‘You’ll be okay by yourself?’

‘Yes!’ I squashed her tightly and then stood up. ‘I feel much better now.’

‘I’m glad.’ Mum smiled, getting a bag out of the sink cupboard and putting my clothes in it. ‘I’ll probably just throw these out, to be honest. You’ve got more than enough jeans and shirts like this.’

‘I’m fine with that.’ I said and she nodded. ‘Thankyou mum! I love you.’

‘I love you too sweetie.’ She smiled and kissed me on the forehead. ‘I’ll call you down to dinner in an hour.’

Once she was gone I ran to the shower and turned it on, but didn’t go in. There was no way I was getting naked in here again after what had just happened, but luckily I was well practiced in the art of faking a shower.

After the water had been running for a minute I shoved my head under the stream and massaged the water into it, then poked my legs in for good measure. When I pulled my head back out water streamed down my body and soaked into the towel, making it look like I’d just finished drying myself off. I shook my head as violently as possible to clear it of water and then bounced out of the room, satisfied that I’d at least cleaned some parts of my body.

My bedroom was far cleaner than it normally would have been due to mum and I having packed up everything that I needed for school a few days ago. Most of the things we’d stored away had been clothes and textbooks, but I’d packed up most of my graphic novels and video games to take with me as well. Two large wheeled suitcases lay next to my queen-sized bed and opposite that sat my now-empty bookshelf, looking lonely and forlorn.

I perused my wardrobe for some decent clothes that hadn’t been packed away and decided upon a pair of jeans similar to the ones I’d just been wearing and a long-sleeved green shirt with a stupid-looking white dog on the front. Mum had bought them when I was ten and they still fit me, much to my dismay. It’d been years since I’d grown enough to need new clothes.

Once I was dressed I went over to my desk, which was as messy as always. It was covered in half-finished drawings of various animals and buildings with markers littered all over the place. Recently I’d been trying to work on a story about a young girl who’d found a baby snake in the city and raised it up as her best friend, but I’d had trouble drawing the snake and so, like always, gave up on it. I was desperately hoping that the cartooning course at Sanders would help me with that. I’d abandoned so many stories over the years due to either becoming disheartened at my drawings or losing interest half-way through. I loved coming up with stories and writing down summaries and scripts but the moment it came to actually putting those ideas into pictures I faltered. A part of me was scared that I’d never be able to draw well and I’d end up having to partner up with another person to create comics. While I didn’t mind doing that with Alexis on little projects, my dream had always been to be able to write and draw my own series of graphic novels. The idea of holding a graphic novel in my hands that had been written and drawn by me, and was being bought and read by other people, made me unbelievably excited.

I was in the middle of trying to clean up the desk when there was a knock at the door, and after a moment Alexis came in with a plate bearing two muffins and some cans of coke.

‘Hey!’ she smiled warmly. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘I’m fine.’ I blushed.

‘Good!’ she sat down the bed and offered up the plate. ‘Want a muffin?’

‘Yes please.’ I sat onto the bed next to her and grabbed one of the muffins. It was twice the size of my hand, full of chocolate chips and deliciously moist.

‘We should have about an hour to finish our comic.’ Alexis said as she chomped on her muffin. ‘That might be enough time to get it done.’

I smiled up at her, immensely grateful that she wasn’t going to bring up what had happened to me in the shower. ‘Did you still want to sketch the spider?’

‘Nah, I can do that at home tomorrow.’

‘Okay! We should work in the office then, I w-’

‘Wait! You’re soaking!’ Alexis gasped and grabbed my hair, which made a squelching sound. ‘Did you even dry yourself?’

‘Yeah! I was in a hurry though so I mightn’t have done a very good job.’ I said casually.

‘You can’t draw while your hairs this wet, it’ll drip onto the paper and ruin it.’ She grabbed the towel off the ground and sat behind me. ‘Don’t move.’

‘I can dry it myself!’ I grumbled but didn’t resist as she ran the towel down my hair. It felt really nice.

‘Jeeze, there’s so many knots in here. When was the last time you brushed it?’

‘I don’t know. I think maybe when we got our last school portraits taken?’

‘That was almost a year ago!’ She cried and I laughed at the horror in her voice.

‘It’s fine! My hair doesn’t need to be brushed.’

‘Uh…yes it does.’ she said and ran her hand between two tangled locks, making me squeak in pain. ‘If you’re going to have your hair this long you need to take care of it.’

‘Reece says that it looks manlier if it’s messy and all over the place like this.’

‘Well, that’s kinda true…but it also makes you look like a crazy homeless kid’

‘Oww!’ I yelped as she tore apart another group of knots. ‘I’d rather look like a crazy homeless kid than be mistaken for a girl again.’

‘That still happens though, doesn’t it?’

‘Only when someone is looking at my back and hears me speaking. Once I turn and look at them they figure it out.’ I said with a satisfied smile, which immediately faded away. ‘Nobody ever believes that I’m fourteen though. Do you remember that fill-in teacher we had for maths last year, Mr Beech?’

‘The one who sent you to the principal’s office because he thought you were a year seven who’d infiltrated his classroom?’ Alexis said and to my annoyance I could her the amusement in her voice.

‘It’s not funny!’

‘Sorry!’ Alexis said, but I could tell that she was still smiling. ‘I know it annoys you, but sometimes it is funny. Remember when we went on a field trip to the natural museum and you got mixed in with that primary school and ended up spending the whole day with them?’

‘Oh.’ I did smile at that. ‘That was a really fun day! I got to watch that awesome movie about dinosaurs with them and even got a free lunch! And I helped cheer up this sad little boy who was being picked on for being overweight!’

‘Didn’t you only do that so he’d give you some of his chocolate biscuits?’

‘Wha-you ask too many questions!’ I said and tried to pull away from her, but she grabbed my shoulders and pulled me backwards.

‘Hold on, let me finish.’ she said and began drying my hair again.

‘Urgh! Aren’t you done yet?’

‘It’d be going a lot faster if you’d stop squirming about.’

‘It’s taking ages!’

‘It’s only been like two minutes…’

‘That’s nearly half of five minutes!’

‘That’s…true…’

‘I’m outta here!’ I gasped and jumped off the bed and out of her grip.

‘Oi! Stop!’ she jumped up and managed to grab me just before I’d escaped out the door, her legs far longer than mine. I squealed and struggled out of her grip and escaped into the hallway, but tripped over myself in my excitement and crashed onto the ground. Alexis laughed and sat down on me before I could recover, then proceeded to squeeze my sides.

‘Ah! No!’ I shrieked with laughter and chomped down on one of her hands. ‘Sopph if!’

‘Oww! You little ferret!’ she cried and promptly bit one of my hands.

I yelped and she pulled her hand free, then proceeded to tickle me even worse than before

We struggled around for a while, shouting and laughing at each out in a sugar-fuelled explosion of craziness. Alexis was far stronger than me and was careful not to injure me, but I had no such problems and play-attacked her with full force. It was a bit embarrassing how weak I was compared to her but that made it more fun, not having to worry about accidentally hurting her.

We finally stopped when I ran out of breath and collapsed on top of her with exhaustion. We were both red-faced, which reminded me of something.

‘Why were you acting weird with mum before?’

‘What?’ Alexis pushed herself up so I slipped down onto her legs. ‘What do you mean weird?’

‘Like, you were acting embarrassed for some reason. Or nervous?’ Alexis’s cheeks reddened slightly and I gasped. ‘Ah! Like that!’

‘You’re imagining things.’ she said, rubbing her cheeks.

‘No I’m not. You even noticed that she w-’

I froze as a horrifyingly familiar sound came from outside. The sound I’d dreaded hearing every single day of my life.

The sound of dads ute coming up the driveway.

Oh no.

 

Eden's Reality

A small 14 year old boy plans on escaping his abusive father and the house where he grew up in by moving to a boarding school with his two best friends, but on the night before he leaves he stumbles across something that changes his life, and his body, forever

(All feedback is very much appreciated!)

Chapter 3

‘Crap!’ I pushed myself off Alexis and walked into the bedroom, my legs shaking.

‘Was that your dad’s car?’ she asked, following me into the bedroom and closing the door. ‘Your mum said he wasn’t going to be home tonight!’

‘He’s supposed to be at a livestock show on the other side of the city, and then at a bar getting drunk!’

Alexis and I shared a concerned look. Dad hated her. When we’d been in kindergarten dad and Alexis’s parents had gotten into a massive fight and he’d banned me from ever seeing her again. She and I had drifted apart as both of us were terrified of dad seeing us together, but we’d reconnected in year nine and a year later dad had magnanimously “allowed” us to see each other again.

I fell silent as the front door opened and dad’s heavy footsteps creaked along the floorboards. I heard him call out for mum and the creaking disappeared into the kitchen for a while, then the sounds of arguing flooded the house. While I couldn’t make out exactly what was being said it sounded like they were arguing about me, as I heard dad say my name, along with Sanders.

My heart sunk. Dad hated that I was going to Sanders, and the fact that I was studying cartooning only made him angrier. He thought that creating comics was a waste of my time and wanted me to take an agricultural course so I could more effectively help him out on the farm, and one day take it over from him when he retired like just like he’d done with his father.

I couldn’t imagine anything worse. And it wasn’t because of the farm work, I’d been to other farms and met their owners and they were all completely different from dad. They’d been nice, encouraging and seemed to genuinely care for their livestock. Dad, on the other hand, was constantly shouting and swearing at everyone around him and seemed to despise the work he did. It was nightmarish helping him out on the farm, as every time I did something wrong I’d be showered in obscenities and sometimes even punched if he deemed my mistake large enough, which they often were in his eyes.

Herding the animals was almost impossible for me as the sheep ignored me just as much as the cows did, and I was so terrified of the bulls that I was useless around them. I wasn’t strong enough to help carry around supplies, didn’t have the stamina to spend all day outside repairing fences and the like, was far too easily distracted to be even remotely effective at clearing paddocks for ploughing and if it happened to be the birthing season I was always far more focused on playing with the baby animals than actually herding them.

Needless to say, dad didn’t have a very high opinion of me. He’d been hoping for a healthy, energetic son who’d grow up to take over the farm from him, and instead he’d gotten me.

I could understand his disappointment.

Silence fell in the kitchen and then the creaking reappeared in the hallway, stopped for a moment and then began ascending the stairs.
‘Oh no.’ I muttered and jumped onto the bed to stop my legs from shaking. Alexis sat down next to me and smiled reassuringly just as the creaking stopped in front of the door.

‘Eden?’ dad asked and then came in before I could answer, like always. He was a large man with sun-darkened skin and a gigantic beer belly that preceded him everywhere he went. His step was a bit wobbly and as he got closer I could smell the pungent mix of B.O and beer that had become so familiar over the past couple of years.

His hair was blonde like mums and mine, but cut close to this skull in a futile attempt to hide the fact that it was balding. It wasn’t very flattering to the rest of his face either, as his lips were thin and dry, his eyes slightly too large and his forehead wide. He wasn’t exactly unattractive, but as he got older and put on more weight he was starting to veer more and more into that territory. The constant drinking definitely wasn’t helping.

‘Hey dad.’ I said and forced myself to smile. ‘How was the livestock show?’

‘It was a waste of time.’ he said, adjusting the thick back glasses he wore when his eyes were sore. ‘All the cows were milkers and the rest of the animals were just poultry.’

‘Milkers?’ I said and almost giggled. I liked how it sounded. ‘Milkers! What are milkers?’

‘Dairy cows, you idiot.’ Dad said and I blushed.

‘Oh. Right.’

He sighed and looked at Alexis. ‘What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at home spending your last day with your parents?’

‘It’s my aunt’s birthday today so they’re visiting her.’

‘Why didn’t you go with them?’

‘I…didn’t want to.’ Alexis said awkwardly.

Dad frowned. ‘Why not?’

‘No reason.’

‘Well, whatever. I want to speak to Eden alone so go do something else for a bit. See if Erin needs some help preparing the food.’

‘Are you staying for dinner?’ I asked and to my dismay he nodded.

‘I am.’ He frowned at Alexis. ‘Are you going or what?’

‘Umm….’ she said and I looked at me in concern.

‘It’s okay. I’ll be fine.’ I smiled, not wanting her to stay and potentially get hurt by dad.

‘Okay…I’ll be back in a couple of minutes then.’

‘No. I’ll let you know when we’re finished.’ Dad moved out of the doorway and gestured for her to leave, which after a moment’s hesitation she did so. He shut the door after her with more force than was necessary and then dropped down into my office chair. It was in front of my desk and he looked down at the half-finished drawings of snakes with a small frown.

‘They’re uhm…meant to be snakes.’ I supplied after he continued to look at the drawings for longer than I was comfortable with.

‘They look like shit.’ he snorted.

‘I-I’m not very good at drawing them yet.’ I flushed, wishing he’d stop looking at them.

‘What’s this supposed to be?’ he held up a drawing of what was supposed to be a tiger snake sleeping amongst a basket of apples. ‘It looks like a worm that’s been squashed by a rockslide.’

‘It’s supposed to be-’

‘You actually think the cartooning course can help you with this crap?’ he crumbled up the picture and threw it to the ground. ‘Because I think it’s going to be a waste of time. A toddler could draw a better snake than that.’

I suppressed a snarl and tried to speak calmly. ‘The teacher of the course is supposed to be really good at helping beginners like me, and the firs-’

‘You can’t turn shit into gold, Eden.’ Dad said seriously. ‘You’re wasting your time.’

‘No I’m not.’ I said as calmly as possible.

‘Yes, you are.’ His voice softened and he turned from the desk to fully face me. ‘I’m going to ask you one last time to stop this stupidity. It’s not too late for you to go back to your old school and take their agricultural course, they’ve kept all of your records on file and I’ve spoken to the principal. He’d be happy to have you back.’

‘No.’ I said firmly, immensely grateful that mum and I had gone behind dads back and applied for and received an academic scholarship. He had no power over me going to Sanders now, as mum had signed all the forms for me and paid for the uniforms and such. All he could do was try to convince me not to go, and there was no chance of that happening. ‘I’m going to Sanders.’

‘Eden, I’m trying to help you.’ Dad said as his voice hardened. ‘You’re actively destroying your future by chasing this stupid dream. Those shitty drawings of yours aren’t going to land you a decent career or a stable income. ’ he put his arms on his knees and leant forward. ‘But working here will. After a couple of years studying agriculture you’ll be more than qualified to work here under my supervision, and when your body finally fixes itself I won’t even have to worry about keep-’

‘No, dad!’ I interrupted, frustrated. ‘You’ve said all of this before and I don’t care! I’m sorry, I really am, but I just don’t want to work here! I want to make comics.’

‘What the fuck is wrong with you?’ he growled. ‘I’m offering you a proper future, one that you can be proud of, one that’ll continue our family legacy! Don’t you care about that?’

‘Not really.’ I said, and immediately regretted it as his whole body spasmed with rage. ‘Uhm! I mean, I d-’

‘This farm has been in our family for fucking generations!’ dad snarled and jumped off the chair to tower over me. ‘Doesn’t that mean anything to you? Your grandparents died here! And their parents before them, all working here on this land so that their children would have a future. So we’d have a future! How can that mean nothing to you?’

‘I don’t know!’

‘You ungrateful little shit.’ he ran his hands over his skull. ‘What the fuck did I do to deserve a son like you?’

‘I’m sorry.’ I said meekly.

‘No you’re not.’ he let his hands drop to his sides and started breathing deeply. ‘Fuck! I’m so tired of going around this, trying to pull you back onto the right path and make you see sense. I should have known that it was pointless. He was right about you, you know. Jon. I should have given up on you years ago.’

I froze. ‘What?’

‘You think I’m an idiot, don’t you? That I actually believe this cartooning bullshit, like your mother does. But I don’t. I know what you’re doing.’

I blinked, completely lost. ‘Huh?’

‘Not even you’re dumb enough to throw away your future like that. You won an academic scholarship for god’s sake, you’re not retarded.’ He pointed at me and came closer. ‘No. No. You’re smart. A dirty, conniving little pervert that manipulates everyone around him.’

‘What are you talking about!?’

‘I found this last night!’ he pulled a folded piece of paper out of his pocket and threw it at me. ‘Packed away in a little box at the bottom of your luggage.’

‘You went through my suitcases?’ I demanded and grabbed the piece of paper and slowly unfolded it. ‘Why would...why…’

My stomach leapt as I realised the piece of paper was a photo, one I recognized. One that I kept hidden amongst various birthday cards in a special little box that I’d decided to take to Sanders with me.

Oh no…

It’d been taken eight years ago, when I was six, outside my old kindergarten. I was beaming at the camera and mum was crouched down next to me with a wide smile on her face. Alexis was on my right side and holding my hand, also beaming, and her mum was the one who’d taken the photo. Alexis and I had been extremely excited because we were about to go to the zoo and…well…

I was dressed as a girl, in a neat pink dress and knee-high socks with black Mary-Jane shoes. The day before the picture was taken I’d stayed at Alexis’s place and when I was there I always dressed in her clothes. I’d liked it for reasons I can’t really explain, looking like a girl and pretending that Alexis and I were sisters, and whenever mum picked me up there was always a struggle to get me back into my boy clothes. Every now and then I’d sneak some of Alexis’s clothes to kindergarten and change into them in the bathroom so I could be a girl around the other kids, and the day of this photo had been one of those instances. Mum arrived at lunch to take me to the zoo and found me dressed like that, and after a small argument decided that she wouldn’t force me to change if I promised not to tell dad, who was spending the day at a friend’s bachelor party.

I promised her I’d not tell anyone, especially not dad, and so began the best day of my life.

Mum proclaimed that if I was going to be dressed as a girl then she’d treat me like one, as her daughter. She used female pronouns to refer to me, didn’t correct strangers when they thought I was a girl (which always happened as my hair was longer then than it was now) and she’d even bought me a red ribbon for my hair and a cute butterfly brooch, both of which had been hidden in the box along with the photo. I really hoped dad hadn’t found them too.

It’s impossible to explain why being treated as a girl made me so happy, but it did and I’d felt closer to mum on that day than I ever had before, like I’d crossed some invisible barrier that had been holding us back from being fully affectionate with one another. Mum seemed to feel the same way too, as she easily slipped into calling me a girl and was more physically affectionate than she ever had been before, hugging and snuggling me every chance she got. When she tied my hair back into a ponytail with the ribbon she'd smiled and said that she'd wanted to do that for a very long time, and was glad that she finally got to spend a day with her daughter.

I'd been so warm and happy in that moment.

Just looking at the picture filled me with confusingly pleasant feelings, but feelings that were now tainted by what Jon had done to me. I didn’t know if I wanted to be a girl back then or if it had been some kind of exploratory phase, but it didn’t matter anymore. I was more likely to kill myself than even dress up as a girl now, as the scars on my body can attest to.

Jon had dressed me up as a girl before he’d…hurt me.

Despite that, I hadn’t been able to throw out the picture. It reminded me of when things had been simpler, before dad had found out about me dressing as a girl and banned me from seeing Alexis, before Jon had hurt me, before my development issues started, before mum had started becoming more and more depressed…

I carefully folded it up and put it in my pocket, my hands shaking. I took a steadying breath and looked up at dad. ‘This picture doesn’t mean anything, I-I only have it because…’

‘Because you want to be a girl.’ Dad finished and I flinched.

‘I don’t! You know I don’t!’

‘Stop fucking lying!’ he shouted and grabbed me by the shoulders. I cried out and tried to push him off but it was futile. ‘I went through the Sanders website last night and I saw their LGBT program, and how supportive they are of trannies. That’s why you’re so intent on going there, isn’t it? You’re going to see one of the doctors there and get them to pump you full of hormones and cut off your cock!’

‘What? No!’

‘Stop lying!’ he slammed me against the wall. ‘That photo proves it! I went looking through your suitcase to see if you had any girl’s clothes or something that would prove me right, and I found that. A picture of you dressed as a girl, hidden away like some fucking treasured gem!’

‘It’s just a p-photo!’ I stammered, my head spinning. ‘It doesn’t mean anything!’

‘Oh yes it does!’ his eyes flashed. ‘You’ve wanted to be a girl ever since you were little and nothing’s changed! I can’t believe I was stupid enough to think I’d managed to beat it out of you after finding you dressed in that bitches clothes. You probably didn’t even listen to me when I told you how disgusting it was! All you did was get better at hiding it from me!’

‘No…I-I did listen…’ I just hadn’t believed him back then.

‘I said stop lying!’ he slammed me against the wall again and pain exploded inside my head. ‘Fuck! You lied about Jon too, didn’t you? You tricked him into fucking you so you could feel like a girl and then when you were found out you pretended it was his idea! He was telling the truth this whole time and you ruined his life for it!’

You liked it, didn’t you? You wanted to feel like a real girl.

I whimpered and began breathing heavily, my head clouding up with horrible memories. What the hell was wrong with dad? He shouldn’t...he shouldn’t …

‘And you’re going to do the same at Sanders, aren’t you? To some poor guy living in your dorm, trick them into thinking you’re a girl and get them to fuck you. And when t-’

Soon you’ll be begging me to put it in you.

‘No! Shut up!’ I screamed through the memories and kicked out, trying to get him to let me go. ‘I don’t want it! You don’t know anything about me!’

‘I know everything about you.’ he snarled, shoving his face up against mine. ‘You’re a dirty little faggot tra-’

I smashed my head against his in a blind panic, unable to handle what he was saying anymore. His nose cracked and blood spurted down his face, causing his hands to finally weaken. I tore out of them and bolted to the door before he could react, but it swung open just as I reached it. Mum stormed into the room with clenched fists, her eyes blazing with rage.

‘What the hell is going on in here!’ she demanded. ‘I can hear you shouting from downstairs!’

‘Mum!’ I cried in relief and threw myself into her, and she wrapped her arms around me protectively.

‘Are you okay?’ she asked and I nodded wearily.

‘Fuck him!’ dad roared. ‘The little cunt head-butted me!’

‘Why?’

‘Because I confronted him with the truth and he didn’t like it.’

‘The truth?’ mum’s eyes narrowed. ‘You mean that insane idea you’ve got about him going to Sanders to be a girl?’

‘It’s not insane.’ Dad hissed, wiping blood from his face and flicking it onto my desk. ‘That photo I showed you proved it. It was in his suitcase!’

‘That doesn’t mean anything!’

‘Why would he have it then? Hidden away in a special little box full of birthday cards?’

‘Because it’s a happy memory!’ mum gently pushed me aside so she could walk up to dad, both their eyes shining angrily.

‘A happy memory of being a girl!’

‘Of going to the zoo with his best friend!’

‘A female best friend, whose clothes he’s dressed in! ’

Mum rubbed her forehead. ‘He was six years old, Daniel. Kids that age always dress up.’

‘What about when they’re twelve then?’ dad crossed his arms. ‘Because I-’

‘Don’t.’ mum said dangerously. ‘Don’t you dare go there.’

‘Why not? You don’t want to hear the truth?’ dad spat. ‘Too bad! Our son was dressing like a girl and getting Jon to fu-’

‘Don’t say that man’s name in this house!’ mum snarled.

‘I can say whatever the fuck I want!’ dad stepped forward so he and mum were inches away from each other, his breathing coming out in shaky gasps. ‘Eden lied about what Jon did to him.’

‘No. He didn’t.’

‘Yes he did! He’s a fucking liar!’

‘Oh, so the doctors were lying too then were they? And the police?’

‘They were retards! Of course they’d believe a sad little kid’s bullshit made-up story over that of a man’s! That’s the kind of bullshit world we live in now!’

‘What about the marks and bruises all over his body then? Were they made up as well?’

‘He did that to himself! Or he got Reece to do it, to make it look like Jon had hit him!’

‘He didn’t know Reece when the bruises first appeared!’

‘Then he did it to himself!’ Dad’s breathing harder now. ‘I’ve known Jon for twenty years and he never, not even once, showed an-’

‘I TOLD YOU NOT TO SAY HIS NAME!’ Mum shouted.

‘I can say whatever the fuck I want in here! This is my house! I was born here!’ Dad shouted back, his hands balled up into fists. ‘Jon! Jon Zeke Hander! My best friend whose life our son ruined with his lies! My best friend!’ Dad’s voice started to shake. ‘Jon was all I fucking had and he took it away from me!’

‘Oh, you poor thing.’ mum sneered. ‘Are you seriously about to cry over him? Fuck you! Jon was a paedophile-’

Dad smashed his fist into her face, throwing her backwards and right into me. I squealed and crawled out from under her as she pushed herself onto her feet, clapping a hand to her beautiful face. Blood streamed through her fingers, coming from her nose and mouth, but her eyes were still wide with hatred. Dad towered over her with clenched fists, seemingly unsure of what he was going to do next.

I stared at them both in horror as my body shook uncontrollably. This had happened so many times before, all because of me. Whenever they argued about me things descended into violence more often than not, and mum was the one who got hurt the most. All I could do was just watch, shaking like a pathetic little coward. I was always so weak and useless…

I looked at mum, dripping blood and staggering to her feet. She’d gotten hit because of me! This was my fault, I had to do something! I had to try and help her, even if it meant dad would hurt me too.

I stepped in front of mum before I could fully comprehend what I was doing and glared definitely up at dad.

‘L-leave mum alone!’

‘Get the fuck out of my way.’ Dad snapped and slapped me with the back of his hand. I cried out and fell onto the ground, tasting blood in my mouth.

Yeah…I was useless…

Mum was in front of me in an instant. ‘Jesus, Dan! Think about what you're doing!'

‘Fuck you.’ Dad said, his eyes red. ‘This is your fault! Why do you have to piss me off so much? You goddam…bitch!’

Mum wiped her face and looked back at me. ‘Alexis went outside looking for the frogs. Go find her.’

I shook my head. Dad was going to hurt her again and I couldn’t just leave her! But what was I supposed to do? He’d just swatted me away like I was an annoying fly, and if I stayed here he might hurt me even more. But he’d hurt mum even more too!

I needed to stay and do something!

But I couldn’t do anything!

What-what-what-

‘Go!’ mum shouted and when I didn’t move she shoved me backwards. ‘Get out of here Eden!’

My will broke and I fled out of the room.

 
Chapter 4

The front door slammed shut behind me as I tore outside, lost in a blind panic. I don’t know where I was even running to, and it didn’t end up mattering as I tripped over a rock jutting out of the dirt a few meters from the house and crashed into the ground. Hard dirt scraped against my face but I ignored the pain and got onto my knees, shame crashing inside of me.

‘Oh god oh god oh god.’ I moaned and grabbed the sides of my head. The world felt like it was tearing itself apart around me, like I was in the middle of an earthquake.

I was so fucking pathetic! I was a boy but I couldn’t even protect mum, or stand up to dad. I was so small and weak and….and disgusting! I should have just died, none of this would be happening if I hadn’t messed up killing myself. Dad never hurt mum this badly before I was hospitalized, before I told them what Jon had done to me. If they didn’t know what he’d been doing to me over the years everything would have been fine! I should have just shut the fuck up and died! Why hadn’t I died?

I just wanted to make you happy.

‘Shut up!’ I screamed and slammed my head against the ground, again and again. ‘Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I’m sick of hearing you in my head! Go away! Go…’

I trailed off as something landed in the dirt in front of me. In the dim light coming from the house I could see the outline of something...familiar, squatting amongst the cracked dirt. As my eyes became used to the darkness I made out eight black eyes staring up at me, shining slightly in the house’s light.

It was the spider from before.

‘Huh?’ I blinked, wondering if I was seeing things. My vision was scarred and blurry from my head hitting the dirt so many times. I looked around and found that I was across the from the cows paddock, a few steps away from dads ute. That was all real, so the spider must be to. I guess? ‘What are you doing here?’

It reared up like before and I jumped to my feet, blinking stupidly at it. What the hell…

‘I’m sorry.’

I flinched as a woman’s voice echoed around me.

‘W-who’s there?’ I turned around but couldn’t see anyone.

‘I don’t know why he wants you dead, but know that this isn’t personal for me. I’m just doing my job.’

‘What?’ I looked at the spider, but the voice wasn’t coming from it. It was as if I was standing in the middle of an empty hall and someone was speaking from directly above me.

‘Don’t fight the spider. Its poison will numb you first, before it becomes fatal. You won’t feel anything and in two minutes you’ll be dead.’

‘Uhm! Excuse me?’ I backed away from the spider as it slowly began walking towards me. ‘I don’t…I know I was just thinking about wanting to be dead but…but…’

‘Again, I’m sorry. Goodbye, Eden.’

‘Wai-’ I cut off with a gasp as the spider’s fangs began smoking and a sharp hissing sound emanated from it. Which was impossible because spiders didn’t hiss. Or have smoky fangs! What the hell!

I took another step backwards just as the spider flung itself at me, its legs stretched out on either side of its bulbous abdomen. A terrified scream escaped my lips and I swatted it away with my right arm, but not hard enough to damage it. It landed safely on the dirt with an audible thud and turned back to face me. Before I could even think about reacting, it reared onto its back legs and shot a multitude of thick strands at me from its abdomen, all of which connected to my chest. I grabbed at one and ripped it off, the slimy silk snapping from just a small amount of pressure from my hand.

There were far too many for me to remove all at once though and the spider was speeding up them, its horrible fangs still billowing with smoke and a silvery spike having appeared where the silk had been shot from.

I realised too late that I should take off my shirt, because just as I grabbed its sides the spider reached my chest. It sunk its fangs right above my heart, and pierced just below with the spike protruding from its abdomen.

A silent scream escaped my lips and I fell backwards, my body freezing up. I could feel the spiders poison pumping into me, into my heart and then all throughout my body. My head became dull and sticky, all of my thoughts and emotions tangling up upon themselves.

What was…going on…was…was I…dying?

You can’t hurt anyone if you’re dead.

Yeah…that was true but…

No. No.

But it would be so easy…I just had to let go…

Stop fighting. You’ll learn to love it one day.

Fuck off!

It’ll only hurt for a minute.

No! No!

Alexis…mum…

Jon…

I said fuck off!

No!

NO!

The spider started shrieking as warmth exploded throughout my body, seeming to come from every single cell inside of me. It almost hurt, like having a shower just on the edge of burning, and I felt the poison stop flooding into me. Only for a moment though, because after a couple of confused seconds my body began sucking it in somehow, pulling it out of the spider. I think? I had no real idea what was happening.
‘What are you doing?’ the woman’s voice demanded and I could hear panic resonating around me.

I looked at my chest to see the spider melting, its legs bursting into streams of blood and its eyes trickling away. My body somehow drew that all inside me along with the venom, and the warmth became more intense. The abdomen exploded like the legs had, revealing what appeared to be a tiny heart, one that was beating frantically.

‘No! That’s a part of m-’ the voice cut off as the heart crumbled and slowly melted into a bloody mess, one that my body slowly absorbed.
The remaining pieces of spider rolled off of me, just two empty fangs and an eyeless head. I began to sit up but the warmth inside of my body suddenly exploded into an ocean of unbearable agony and I began screaming. It felt like every part of me was being torn apart and a blinding white light consumed my body, pulling my consciousness away as if I was being dragged out to sea by a riptide and then…

And then…

And then it was gone. The pain, the tearing sensation, the feeling of being dragged away, and the light. Everything. As if it had never even happened.

I lay on the ground for a moment, staring up at the starlit sky, and then sat up with a gasp.

‘What the hell!’ I croaked and got onto my knees.

That wasn’t real, that couldn’t have been real, I imagined it, hallucinated it or something! I was panicking and I must have…I don’t know…I don’t know! What the fuck!

I looked around for the remains of the spider but couldn’t see them, perhaps because of how dark it was, or perhaps because they weren’t there to begin with. My body seemed fine too despite having felt like it was being ripped apart a minute ago. I put a hand to my chest and found that my shirt was dry despite having apparently been drenched in spider blood and webbing.

‘Okay. Okay.’ I said as I took slow, calming breaths. ‘I imagined it, just like with Jon before. Nothing happened. No spider, no voice, no weird body things. Hahaha! Oh god…I’m losing my mind aren’t I?’

I once again fell backwards and let out heavy sigh. Maybe I should go and see a councillor at Sanders like mum suggested. That had been terrifying, being attacked by the spider. And its venom in me, tearing me up from the insides…it had felt so real, so painful. Almost as bad as what Jon had done to me.

He’d never had the decency to try and kill me though.

A rustling came from the paddock with the cows and I sat up to see a dark figure climb over the fence. I frowned tiredly at it and was relieved to see that it was just Alexis.

‘Eden?’ she asked when she saw me. ‘What are you doing out here?’

‘What are you doing out here?’

‘I was trying to find those frogs you mentioned but it got too dark so I headed back, but I wanted to get a picture of the cows first.’ She said and held up her phone. ‘But the moons not out and the flash on this isn’t good enough to light up a whole cow so I gave up. I was hoping to get some kind of…I don’t know…majestic cow picture.’

‘Majestic cow?’ I asked, the two words not gelling together in my head.

‘It was just an idea.’ She muttered and sat down in front of me. ‘You didn’t tell me what you were doing out here.’

I considered telling her about the weird spider incident and then gasped. Oh god! I’d almost forgotten! ‘Mum and dad! They…they’re fighting…’

‘What! Why?’ Alexis asked just as the sound of glass shattering came from the house. ‘What happened?!’

‘Dad was being really weird, asking me…things.’ I scratched the sides of my head, not really comfortable sharing the stuff dad had accused me of with Alexis just yet. ‘Stuff about Sanders, and he got really angry and…and mum came in and she was really angry too and…and…uh…s-so she told me to come and find you and I did.’

‘Are you okay?’ Alexis turned on her phone and shone the light onto my face. I could only imagine how bad I looked, with a bruised lip and scraped forehead, covered in dirt and blood. ‘Oh my god! That piece of shit!’

‘I’m fine.’ I said and rubbed my face to try and clear away some of the blood, but just made it dirtier.

‘Let me see.’ Alexis reached out to touch my face but I flinched and slapped her hand away, a gross feeling wrapping itself around my stomach. A disgustingly familiar feeling.

‘Uhm! I don’t want to be touched at the moment sorry!’ I took in a shuddering breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm myself down.
Alexis looked at me in shock and then blushed, pulling her hand away. ‘Sorry! I didn’t mean to…’

‘No, it’s okay. I just…I feel weird.’ I shrugged awkwardly, trying to get rid of the feelings crawling down my spine. I don’t know if it was because of the spider or Jon but I didn’t want anyone to touch me right now.

Alexis began to say something but stopped as the front door slammed open, and we both watched as dad stormed out, his whole body shaking. He walked to his ute, which Alexis and I were a couple of meters across from, and when he noticed us he froze. After a moment of tense silence he twitched his shoulder awkwardly and came over to us. Alexis stood up and stared definitely at him but he ignored her and looked down at me. His face was wet with tears and I felt a confusing moment of pity for him.

‘Here.’ he took out his wallet and removed some bills. ‘I wanted to give this to you before. It was why I wanted to talk to you before, I just wanted to give you this and some advice but…’ His face shook and tears leaked out of his red eyes. ‘I…I didn’t mean to…what happened shouldn’t have happened, I didn’t mean to get so angry but…but you…that fucking photo Eden! It just set me off, made me…you know…like I was before but…your mother was right, it was just a photo and I…reacted badly…’

‘Okay.’ I said warily and scooped up the money, wondering how he could afford to give me this much money. There had to be over two hundred dollars here. Had he been saving it to give to me? A pang of guilt ran through me.

‘A-alright then.’ Dad said after I didn’t say anything else for a while. He wiped his eyes and began walking to the ute. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’
He got in and started it, but just sat there staring at the steering wheel.

‘I’ve never seen him cry before.’ Alexis said quietly as she knelt down next to me.

‘He’s been crying a lot since I went to hospital.’ I said, putting the money in my pocket. ‘I really hurt him whe-’

‘You hurt him?’ Alexis said and glared at me. ‘You didn’t do anything!’

This is your fault.

You made me do this. You s-

‘No!’ I clutched at my shirt and shivered. ‘Shut up!’

‘What?’ Alexis looked at me in surprise.

‘Not you.’ I shook my head angrily.

‘Are you sure you’re okay?’ Alexis asked just as we were bathed in the bright lights of a car’s headlights, and we turned to see a red SUV turning into the driveway.

‘Oh!’ I recognized that SUV.

‘My parents!’ Alexis said excitedly and jumped to her feet. ‘Oh thank god!’

Dad’s ute started up with a roar as soon as the SUV approached and he began to drive off. Alexis’s parents beeped at him in greeting but he ignored them and disappeared around the corner just like Reece had, hidden behind the hedges.

‘Eden.’ a voice said from the house and I turned to see mum leaving it, a frozen bag of peas held against her face.

‘Mum!’ I ran over and went to hug her, but the sick feeling stopped me before I touched her. ‘Are you okay?’

‘Here. Put this against your lip.’ She handed me another bag of frozen vegetables. ‘Are you alright?’

‘Are you?’ her face was free of blood but her lip was clearly bruises and her left eye was red and raw.

‘I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.’ She reached out to touch my face but I backed off, making her grimace. ‘Eden…I’m not going to hurt you.’

‘I know.’ I said but when she tried to touch me again I moved away. ‘I’m sorry!’

Mum snarled and clenched her free hand into a fist. ‘That fucking asshole! Look at you! How could your father still think you’re lying?’

I just stared sadly at her, not sure what to say. She went to pat me on the head but stopped herself with a growl, then walked past me and went over to the SUV, where Alexis’s parents were just getting out. Her dad was as tall as his daughter and of Japanese descent, with short black hair and a rather pudgy, kind face. His wife was also slightly overweight and had a kind face like her husband, but she Caucasian and over a head taller than him. Alexis looked like her more than she did her father, which I think is why they named her Alexis and not something Japanese like they had with her sister, who far more resembled their father.

They were both amazing people and I felt myself relaxing just from seeing them. I hurried after mum to greet them and the slimy, cold fingers caressing my stomach slowly disappeared.

‘Hey guys!’ Mrs Nakamura smiled as we approached. ‘Sorry we’re a bit early! We j-ah! What happened to your face?’

‘Don’t worry about it.’ Mum said. ‘Look, c-’

‘Oh my god! Eden!’ she gasped when she saw my face. ‘What happened? Did Dan attack you two?’

‘What?’ Mr Nakamura turned from where he’d been hugging Alexis to stare at us. ‘What’s going on?’

‘Did he do that to your face?’ Mrs Nakamura asked. ‘And to Eden too?’

‘Yes.’ Mum said and rubbed the side of her face, her eyes tired.

‘Are you hurt as well?’ Mr Nakamura asked his daughter and she shook her head.

‘No, I’ve been out here for a while. I don’t even really know what happened.’ She said, staring at mum’s bloodied face with wide eyes.
‘Everything’s fine now. ’ Mum said and looked at Alexis’s parents. ‘I’ll explain what happened later, but…c-can I ask you two for a favour?’
‘Anything.’ Mrs Nakamura said immediately.

‘Can you take Eden home with you tonight, and then take him to Sanders tomorrow?’

‘What?’ I exclaimed, dropping the bag of frozen vegetables. ‘No!’

‘We can do that, sure.’ Mr Nakamura frowned. ‘But you and I should go inside and talk, okay?’

‘Mum! What are you doing?’ I grabbed her hand and forced her to look down at me.

‘Your father’s going to be home sometime tonight or tomorrow. Do you want to be here when he does?’ she said as she pulled my arm off of hers.

‘N-no, but…you shouldn’t be either then!’

‘You’re more than welcome to come with us.’ Mr Nakamura said.

‘No, I’m staying here. I need to talk to him when he’s sobered up.’ Mum growled.

‘What if he hurts you again?’

Mum laughed bitterly. ‘He’s not going to. He’ll spend the night at some bar getting drunk and then come home full of bullshit apologies and be all loving and shit. If Eden’s here though-’

‘What?’ I demanded angrily.

‘He might get angry again.’ Mum finished heavily. ‘And I don’t want us to have to deal with that.’

‘Then let’s go!’ I tugged on her arm but she once again pulled my hand off.

‘I told you, I want to be here when he gets back, so I can talk to him.’

‘About what?’

‘About what just happened! And how to make sure it never happens again.’

‘What about after that then? Can you come take me to Sanders?’ I grabbed her arm with both hands this time.

‘I don’t think I can, Eden…’

‘But you said that we were going to have lunch at that café near the campus! And you were going to buy me a little soft toy possum to put on my bed so I wouldn’t get lonely! You haven’t bought me it yet! I don’t have it! You have to come with me and buy one!’

Mum’s lips trembled and she wiped her eyes. ‘I…Eden…let me think…’

‘No! Mum!’ I tugged on her arm. ‘You promised!’

‘Eden! Stop!’ Mum said in the same tone that she’s used to make me leave the house. I froze and slowly let go of her arm. ‘I need time to think, okay? Go with Mrs Nakamura. Please. We’ll talk again tomorrow.’

‘But…’ I began, unsure of what else to say.

‘Everything’s going to be fine.’ Mum said and tried to smile, but just ended up looking more miserable. ‘I’ll see you soon, yeah?’

‘I guess…’

I watched in confusion as she tried to smile again and walked back to the house. Alexis’s dad said something to his wife and Alexis but I wasn’t paying attention, and before I knew it he and mum had both gone into the house and disappeared from sight.

‘Why don’t we just call the police?’ Alexis asked as soon as they were gone. ‘This happens like once a month now and Erin never calls them! She always says that she’s going to talk to him about it b-’

‘Alexis. Not now.’ Mrs Nakamura said sharply and put a hand on my shoulder. ‘Come on Eden. Have you had dinner yet? We could pick something up on the way home.’

‘We were going to have roast chicken…’

‘Oh yeah!’ Alexis said unhappily. ‘I was really looking forward to that.’

‘Why don’t we get some KFC then?’ Mrs Nakamura said and Alexis perked up.

‘What about pizza? Can we order from that place down the road from us?’

‘Sure! What about you Eden?’

‘Okay.’ I wasn’t hungry in the slightest, but I did need to stick to my diet and I hadn’t had any meat today.

‘Let’s get going then.’ She smiled and we got into the SUV, Alexis and I sitting in the back. It smelt of doughnuts and coffee, which made me relax a little bit more.

‘I don’t understand why mum can’t take me to Sanders tomorrow.’ I said as we pulled out of the driveway. ‘What does she need to think about?’

‘Adult things.’ Mrs Nakamura said and looked back at me with a smile. ‘She’s doing to do what’s best for you though, honey. Don’t worry about it.’

Don’t worry about it? Hah. That was impossible. Mum had seemed more tired than I’d ever seen her before! Dad had hit her a lot in the past, more times than I’d like to count, but she seemed…exhausted this time, like she’d been about to collapse and break into tears. I’d only seen her cry a few times before, but none of them had been after dad hit her.

She wouldn’t have been this upset if I hadn’t told her what Jon did to me. Or…

I shouldn’t have…failed…trying to kill myself. I should have made sure I died…if I had then both mum and dad would have never known what Jon did to me. They’d be sad I was dead but dad hadn’t really liked me anyway and without me to worry about mum could probably leave him and live in a small apartment by herself, get a job and find someone to love who wouldn’t hurt her. She could even have another kid, she wasn’t too old for that. A better me. A boy who wasn’t a pathetic embarrassment. Same with dad too. They could both live happy lives without me.

My wrists started itching. Itching so badly…I needed to cut…I needed to feel good! I nee-

‘Eden?’ Alexis asked and I blinked, realising that she and her mum had been talking to me.

‘Sorry, what?’

‘Are you okay?’ she asked and looked at me in concern.

‘I’m fine!’ I rubbed my face, realizing that some tears had fallen down my cheeks. ‘What were you saying?’

‘I was asking what you wanted to do when we got home. I was thinking that we could play some video games? We could play some Country on the WiiU?’

‘Okay.’ I shrugged, not really caring. I just wanted to curl up into a ball and wait for mum to call me. I hated being separated from her at times like these, when I didn’t know if she was going to be alright or not. All I wanted to do was hug her and make sure she was okay, that she wasn’t going to start crying or feel lonely.

Alexis gently held my hand and squeezed. I blinked and them smiled, warmth flowing through me from her grip. She smiled as I squeezed back and a warm, comforting feeling ran down my spine.

I…guess this was okay…

To be continued....

Thankyou so much for reading! I apologize if this is moving a bit too slow, towards the transformation part, but it's necessary. Eden's world needs to be shown as it is before so that the changes mean something.
I hope the spider sequence wasn't too jarring, but I needed to add it in to lead into the transformation and later plot-lines.

~ BrokenFox

Eden's Reality: Chapters 5-6

A small 14 year old boy plans on escaping his abusive father and the house where he grew up in by moving to a boarding school with his two best friends, but on the night before he leaves something unexpected happens, and he wakes up the next day a different person.

All feedback is very much appreciated :)

Chapter 5

It was a twenty minute drive to Alexis’s home, which was situated a couple of suburbs deep in the city. The paddocks full of sleepy livestock quickly gave way to dark factories and abandoned warehouses, then spread out into blocks of houses and restaurants. We followed the main road down towards the heart of the city and then turned off into a brightly-lit street full of giant houses with even larger front yards. Dogs barked excitedly as we drove past but were quickly yelled into silence by their owners or grumpy neighbors.

Alexis’s house was at the end of the street, nestled between an empty lot and a house so large that it could almost have been a mansion. Mrs Nakamura parked the SUV outside the front yard just and I slowly climbed out, shivering at how cold it’d become outside.

A neat, colourful garden took up most of front yard, perfectly maintained by Alexis’s mum and younger sister. I knew nothing about gardening but it looked beautiful, with rows upon rows of bright flowers running up and down the fresh grass. There was a large fountain in the centre, depicting resting horse with a couple of birds standing on its back and spewing out water, and a few healthy oak trees were in each of the yards corners. Alexis and I had spent countless happy hours running around here as kids, searching for interesting bugs and playing random make-believe games.

She came over the side of the SUV and smiled at me. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘Better.’ The drive here had helped me relax, but Alexis holding my hand had helped the most. ‘I’m glad I’m here and not at home.’

‘So am I.’ Alexis said as we walked past a cluster of sweet smelling blue flowers. ‘I just wish it was under better circumstances.’

‘So do I.’ I said darkly as we reached the veranda. The house itself was two storeys tall, dark brown and in far better condition than my own. I guess that wasn’t really saying much though...most houses were better than mine.

‘Eden, you go and clean your face, okay?’ Mrs Nakamura said as she opened the front door. It revealed a spacious entrance hall that was almost bigger than my bedroom. ‘And Alexis, could you go see if Nyoko has any clean clothes for him to change into?’

‘What? No!’ I gasped. Nyoko was Alexis’s eleven-year-old sister, who was just slightly taller than me. Whenever I stayed here and needed a change of clothes I wore her ones, as Alexis’s were way too big for me. Luckily Nyoko wasn’t all that feminine and had more than enough pants and shirts to spare, but it still felt weird.

‘I’m sorry Eden, but I’d rather you changed. Your clothes are covered in dirt and grass stains, especially on your back.’ Mrs Nakamura smiled apologetically.

I looked down and grimaced, seeing that she was right. I hadn’t even realised how dirty I’d gotten, but I had lain in the dirt when the imaginary spider had attacked. ‘Oh. Okay then.’

‘Thanks.’ She smiled and then began walking down the side hallway that led to her and her husband’s bedroom. ‘I’m going to get changed and then head off back to your place, but I’ll give you some money for pizza before I leave. Think about what you’d like!’

I nodded and headed off to the bathroom, which was through the massive living room and opposite the guest room that I sometimes slept in. The Nakamura’s house was very, very clean and I always felt slightly out of place when I visited, as if I was some kind of dirty vagrant come in off the streets. They were far wealthier than my own parents, both of them working as a criminal defence lawyers, and it showed in their house. Every room seemed to be twice as large as it needed to be, from the kitchen to the offices right down to the laundry, and twice a week they hired a maid to come in and clean everything. Large paintings hung from the walls, all brand new unlike the ones mum and I bought, and they depicted famous scenes from literary such as Captain Ahab on the deck of the Pequod and Holden Caulfield watching a carousel in the rain. They were all wonderfully painted and I imagined that just one of them would cost more than dad made in a year.

The bathroom was amazing, of course. Its floor was a smooth black marble, the sink was perfectly white porcelain and the bathtub could comfortably fit four of me inside of it.

‘Oh god.’ I muttered as I looked at my reflection, not expecting to look as bad as I did. My forehead was a mass of dirt and blood with matted strands of hair falling around it, and the corner of my left lip was just as bad. It strangely wasn’t swollen though, and when I checked the inside cut I found that it’d already healed.

I quickly washed my forehead and to my surprise found that the scrapes caused by me smashing my head against the hard dirt had healed too, and the scarring was much smaller than it should have been. I hadn’t imagined hitting my head against the dirt had I? Like I had with the spider? Surely not, the scars were there, just…tiny.

Weird. I wasn’t going to complain though. I hadn’t been too keen on the prospect of explaining to the other students at Sanders what’d happened to my face, especially on my first day there.
I made sure to clean my face as thoroughly as possible, not wanting there to be even a hint of blood left when I was done. I was perhaps a bit overzealous though, as by the time I’d finished my hair was dripping wet and most of my face had been rubbed raw. But there was no blood or dirt left!
Alexis came in just as I finished and I grinned as she raised her eyebrows at how wet I was. She sighed, grabbed a towel from the sink cupboard and held me steady with one hand.

‘Here, I’ll dry you.’ she said and began to gently rub my face with the towel. ‘I know how bad you are at doing it yourself.’

‘Thanks!’ I said, not going to argue with her. I hadn’t even thought about drying myself. ‘Did you find some clothes for me to wear?’

‘Yeah, I grabbed some of Nyoko’s old pants and a shirt. I left them on my bed for you to change into when we’re done here.’ she said as she dried the back of my neck, drawing out a surprised squeal from me. ‘Aww! That was cute!’

‘Shut up.’ I blushed. ‘My back’s really sensitive.’

‘I know.’ she grinned and then rubbed the same spot, making me giggle.

‘Stop it!’ I laughed and grabbed her hand, but she just grinned and continued to rub the back of my neck. It felt so good that I didn’t bother resisting after a while, just blushed happily up at her and let the pleasant sensations wash over me. After a while warmth began to grow inside my stomach and I was abruptly consumed by a wave of affection for her.

She was so amazing! I felt so much better than I had an hour ago thanks to her, and all she’d done was hold my hand and dry me with a towel. Just being around her was comforting, like it was with mum but…it was different somehow. Alexis was beautiful, with her silky black hair curling around her long neck and…and her soft, curved lips, smooth cheekbones and deep blue eyes that always made me happy when they looked at me…

Butterflies erupted in my stomach just as my chest welled up with something I didn’t recognize, and before I knew what was happening I’d made a soft squeaking sound and dived into her chest. I wrapped my arms around her and squished myself against her body, for the first time realising how soft and warm she was.

‘Eden? What’s wrong?’ she put down the towel and looked at me in concern. ‘Are you okay?’
‘Mm!’ I smiled and squeezed her harder. ‘I’m just really happy for some reason! I love you so much Alexis!’

‘Y-you do?’ She asked slowly and I nodded. ‘Really?’

‘Yes! You’re my best friend and…and…’ I struggled to put what I was feeling into words. ‘I really like you!’

She at me in surprise as colour flushed into her cheeks. After a moment she put her hands on the sides of my face and leant down slightly so our faces were closer. ‘I love you too Eden! I’ve loved you for so long!’

‘Me too!’ I said and then remembered the photo in my pocket. ‘You’re like an older sister! The best older sister ever!’

‘Wha-huh?’ she blinked and her eyes narrowed. ‘Sister? You see me as a sister?’

‘Oh!’ I flinched at her reaction and loosened my grip around her. ‘Sorry! Was that a weird thing to say?’

‘No! No, of course not!’ she said after a moment and pulled her hands off my face. ‘I just thought that you…I was thinking of…because you said…uh…’

‘What’s wrong?’ The butterflies disappeared as an uncomfortable feeling rose inside of me.

‘I…nothing.’ she muttered and took a step back, looking disappointed for some reason.

‘Are you okay?’ I asked, scared that I’d done something wrong. Was it really bad for a boy to tell a girl that he saw her as an older sister? It was, wasn’t it? Shit! I should have just kept my mouth shut! ‘I’m really sorry! I didn’t mean to say something bad!’

‘It’s okay! I’m fine!’ she said and rubbed her face. ‘Sorry Eden. It’s just been a long day, you know? My mind’s not working at a hundred percent.’

‘Are you mad at me?’ I asked and she looked at me with wide eyes, and then actually laughed. ‘What! What’s funny?’

‘Nothing. Nothing.’ She shook her head, grinning. ‘Jesus. You’re just so naïve sometimes. Or maybe I am, actually. I forgot sometimes that you’re…well, you.’

‘What do you mean?’

She shook her head slightly and let out a heavy sigh, her cheeks still red. ‘It doesn’t matter. I need to get a glass of water from the kitchen, and probably an aspirin too. I think I’m starting to get a headache. You should go change into Nyoko’s clothes!’

‘Wh-’

‘I’ll be back in a minute!’

‘I…okay!’ I watched her hurry out of the room and ran my hands through my hair, completely confused. What had just happened? I guess I hadn’t said something weird, but I’d definitely said something wrong, something that had disappointed her. She seemed to have expected me to say something other than that I saw her as a sister but I had no idea what. Maybe I should have said she was my best friend? I thought that was obvious though! And besides, what I’d felt hadn’t been the same as what I felt for Reece and he was my best friend too. What I’d felt for Alexis had been stronger than best friend feelings. I wasn’t exactly sure what it had been but it’d been nice, and kind of exciting.

It…hadn’t been bad had it? Had Alexis known what I’d felt and that was what had made her uncomfortable? But why? It was a good feeling, not a bad one! I’d felt really nice and warm, and really sensitive and exited too. Just thinking about how it felt made the butterflies in my chest start to appear again, and a strong desire to hold Alexis started to grow. She was so soft and squishy, especially her chest! Her breasts had felt…good…pushing against the top of my head…I wished I was taller so I could feel them against my own chest…I think…did I want that? Would it feel good? I…

‘Uhm!’ I blushed as I felt the warmth growing inside me again. This was weird! I shouldn’t be thinking about Alexis’s body like this! It wasn’t right!

I shook my head and hurried out of the bathroom, trying to ignore the feelings inside me. Now was not the time to be thinking about this kind of stuff. I didn’t know what I was feeling but I was starting to realise that it wasn’t as innocent as I’d first thought. Shit.

I headed for Alexis’s room, which was at the very back of the house. It was opposite her sister’s room and next to a large den that contained a pool table, a couple of overstuffed bookshelves and a massive TV that was primarily used to play video games. Whenever Alexis’s parents had a party all the kids would end up down here while the adults milled about in the upstairs dining room and kitchen.

Alexis’s bedroom door had her name emblazoned upon it in bold, golden text and a beautifully painted baby seal looked happily at me from underneath it. Baby seals were Alexis’s favourite animal and I smiled at the painting as I opened the door, appreciating its cuteness. She’d painted it herself last year and I always felt a small pang of jealousy at that. She was so much better than I was at drawing and she didn’t even want to create comics.

Her room was almost as empty as mine was, with most of her stuff having also been packed away to take to Sanders. Some of her sketchpads and drawing guidebooks were still on her desk though, along with her computer and tablet. Various scientific posters lined the black walls, mainly of animal species but there were a few insect and plant ones as well. There was a shelf above her bed where she displayed her favourite series of beautifully made small animal figurines, and a bookcase on the other side of the room was brimming with others that she’d collected. I’d once wanted to collect them myself but each one cost fifty dollars so…yeah…that dream had died pretty quickly.
A sofa bed that I slept on sometimes was next to Alexis’s queen-sized one, and a large baby seal plushy looked up at me from between the two blue pillows. Nyoko’s clothes were lying just under it and to my relief they were pretty gender-neutral. Just a pair of black track pants and a long-sleeved white shirt.

I closed the door and quickly got changed, then looked at myself in the full-length mirror next to the sofa bed. As expected, the clothes fit me far better than they should have, and they actually looked pretty good. I liked shirts that were comfortably tight with a long bottom, and I far preferred baggy pants over tight ones. Still, it was pretty damn depressing that the clothes of a girl three years younger than me fit so well.

‘I wish you’d hurry up and grow!’ I snapped at my reflection. ‘It’s been nearly five years since I stopped getting taller and I’m still only as strong as I was when I was ten! Why couldn’t dad have let me see a doctor so…so I-’

Dad’s enraged face popped into my head and I flinched. God damn it! I didn’t need to be remembering that right now! He couldn’t hurt me here, I was fine. And mum was…mum wasn’t fine! Shit! Where was Mrs Nakamura? Wasn’t she supposed to be going back to my place and checking on mum? Had she left already?

Anxiety washed over me and I began walking to the bedroom door, but I’d barely taken two steps before a horrible feeling exploded inside of me. For a terrifying couple of seconds I felt like I was falling, like I’d somehow stepped backwards off a cliff and was plummeting towards the ground. A scream tried to rip its way out of my chest but it didn’t make it as I crashed down against the ground and the air was pushed out of my lungs. I moaned and lay staring up at the ceiling in a daze as my whole body tingled unpleasantly.

What the hell just happened?!

I turned over and pushed myself onto my knees, then checked my body to make sure nothing was injured. Everything seemed fine and I wasn’t in any pain, but I felt off somehow, like my centre of gravity had been altered.

S-something was very wrong.

Nyoko’s clothes were looser than they had been before. The shirt wasn’t as tight as it had been and the sleeves were longer, as if the whole thing had grown two sizes. And to my embarrassment when I stood up the pants just slipped right off me, as if they too had grown.

‘Uhm!’ I slipped the pants back up and knelt on the ground, pulling the elastic around the waist tighter and tying it into a knot. I’d never had to do that with any pair of pants before! Oh god…had I just shrunk in size?

That’s what I was feeling, the weird off-balance sensation and messed up centre of gravity. Nyoko’s clothes hadn’t grown, I’d shrunk! Was that possible? I’d never heard of someone shrinking before but my body wasn’t normal, it’d been developing so slowly…had it messed up so badly that it was now growing backwards?

No! That was impossible, I was being stupid! Of course I wasn’t shrinking! I’d heard of other people’s bodies developing slowly like mine had but I’d never heard of someone’s shrinking. This was just another hallucination, like all of the other weird stuff I’d seen today. I’d probably imagined the clothes fitting properly, just like I’d imagined that spider.

But…

I threw off the clothes and put on the ones I’d just taken off, and to my horror they were now larger. The jeans slipped off of me and the shirt was even baggier than Nyoko’s one had been.

‘Shit!’ I quickly took them off and put Nyoko’s back on, feeling horribly small in my own clothes. ‘Oh god oh god…okay. Okay! Uhm…uhm…uhm!’

I dropped to my knees and ran my hands through my hair, trying to comprehend what was happening. This was impossible, I couldn’t have shrunk. It wasn’t real, my brain had gotten confused somehow because of all the stress and it thought that I was smaller than I was. And this had happened right after I’d gotten anxious after seeing dad! So it had to be a stress-hallucination thing! I just needed to calm down and everything would be okay again in a few minutes. God! I wish mum was here! Deep breaths…I needed to calm myself down…

‘Eden? You dressed?’ Alexis’s voice came from outside the door.

‘Ah! Alexis! I’m dressed!’

‘Good!’ she came into the room and closed the door after her, then blinked when she saw me kneeling on the ground. ‘What are you doing down there?’

I jumped to my feet and ran over to her. She was definitely taller than she had been, as instead of coming up to the middle of her chest I only came up to near the bottom of it. That was like a ten centimetre difference! ‘Do I look smaller to you?’

‘What?’ she frowned and looked down at me. ‘No, I don’t think so.’

‘Are you sure?’ I tugged on her arm. ‘Please look really hard!’

Her eyes narrowed and she slowly looked me up and down. ‘…huh. You kind of do seem a bit shorter, actually.’

I stared at her with wide eyes, the bottom falling out of my stomach. ‘I do? This is real?’

‘I…guess so?’ She frowned. ‘Are you alright? What’s going on?’

‘I don’t know! I fell over and then I was suddenly shorter! I didn’t do anything weird, it just happened!’

She knelt down and slowly looked me over again. ‘Well, you don’t seem that much shorter, only like a couple of centimetres. Maybe you’ve…I don’t know…changed your posture or something?’

‘My posture?’ I frowned. That didn’t sound right. ‘When I hugged you before though I was taller!’

‘Yeah but, I was wearing shoes back then.’ she said and I looked down at her feet, which were bare. ‘Only sneakers, but they had a pretty thick bottom.’

‘B-but…’ I stammered and the pointed at my clothes. ‘They don’t fit properly anymore! They feel weird and baggy!’

‘Weren’t they always baggy though?’

‘Yeah but…but…god!’ I threw my hands up in frustration. ‘Do you think I’m imagining this?’

‘No, you’re definitely shorter.’ Alexis said and relief flooded through me. ‘It’s probably just me not wearing shoes or something though. Or maybe I’ve gotten taller! I’m still growing, you know.’

‘That’s-yeah!’ I gasped. ‘You’ve probably had a growth spurt! And I must have imagined all the stuff with the clothes! I’m not going crazy’

‘Nope! You’re not going crazy.’ Alexis beamed and I almost fell over from relief. I reached out to hug her but stopped myself just in time, remembering what had happened in the bathroom.

‘Oh!’ I grabbed her hand instead and looked up at her in concern. ‘What happened before? Are you okay?’

‘Yes! I’m all good now.’ She nodded and swept me up in a hug. It felt different from before due to the change in height, but it was still nice. Thankfully not as weirdly nice as before though. ‘Don’t worry about it.’

‘What happened?’

‘It’s hard to explain and…we don’t need to talk about it now.’ She ruffled my hair and grinned at me. ‘It’s not important. Honestly.’

I was trying to decide if I should push the issue more when there was a jingling from out in the hallway and we both turned to the doorway just as Mrs Nakamura entered. She was holding her car keys and had changed into more comfortable-looking clothes.

‘Knock knock!’ she said as she entered and smiled at Alexis and I. ‘I’m heading off now! I left some money on the kitchen bench for the pizza, you should order it soon so you’re not up too late.’

‘Thanks mum!’ Alexis smiled and detached from the hug.

‘Are you going to make mum come here?’ I asked hopefully but Mrs Nakamura shook her head.

‘I’m not going to force her to do anything.’ She said and smiled tightly. ‘Although I wish I could, to be honest. She knows what’s best for the two of you though, more than I do.’

‘Can you make her take me t-’ I cut myself off, realising that she’d just said she wasn’t going to make mum do anything. ‘Uhm! Can you…uh…’

She put a hand on my shoulder and gently squeezed it. ‘Try not to stress about it, honey. At least not until my husband and I get back.’

‘O-okay.’ I nodded, feeling stupid. ‘Thankyou.’

‘Just try and relax.’ she said gently. ‘Can you do that?’

‘I’ll make sure he does.’ Alexis smiled and patted me on the back.

‘Okay then! I’ll see you guys in a few hours.’ Mrs Nakamura said and nodded at Alexis. ‘Don’t forget to order your sister something as well, okay? She hasn’t had dinner yet.’

‘Ah! Pizza!’ Nyoko came running out of her room, having clearly been eavesdropping on the conversation. She was like a smaller, chubbier version of Alexis with a bowl cut. ‘I want a meat-lovers! A big one!’

‘You can have a small meat-lovers.’ Alexis laughed and looked at me. ‘Did you want to go halves in a Hawaiian?’

‘Okay!’ To my surprise I was actually starting to feel really hungry. ‘Could we maybe get a large one?’

‘What about garlic bread? And coke?’ Nyoko looked up at her sister pleadingly.

‘No coke!’ Mrs Nakamura said as she started walking off.

‘What! No! Mum!’ Nyoko cried and ran over to her. ‘I haven’t had any today!’

‘It’ll keep you up all night if you have some now, and you’ve got school in the morning.’

‘But you can’t have pizza without coke! That’s mean!’

‘What? How is it mean?’

Their voices disappeared down the hall and Alexis and I shared an amused smile. Nyoko was very passionate about pizza.

‘Right!’ Alexis said and grinned at me. ‘Let’s order some pizza and relax!’

‘Mm!’ I returned her grin. ‘Can we play pool for a bit?’

‘I thought you wanted to play on the WiiU.’ Alexis asked as she left the room.

‘I do but…’ I began but stopped, a small shiver running down my spine. I felt an uncomfortable sensation, as if I was being watched, and slowly turned around to look at the back of the room.
Where a woman was standing next to the computer desk, staring at me in utter bewilderment and holding a half-eaten slice of cake. She had flowing black hair tied into a loose ponytail with two thick strands falling on either side of her face, which was long and defined with a scar running down from the corner of her bottom lip to under her chin. A loose black nightdress hung off of her bony frame and I could see an array of other scars along her shoulders and legs.

‘Oh!’ she said in a familiar voice and I gasped. That was the same voice I’d heard when the spider had attacked! ‘Bloody hell! What the fuck have I done to you?’

‘Huh!?’ I gaped at her, just as bewildered as she was.

‘Eden?’ Alexis asked and I turned to where she was she frowning at me form the doorway. ‘You okay?’

I stared at her in confusion and pointed at the woman. ‘Look!’

Alexis followed my hand and blinked. ‘See who?’

‘Her! Can’t you s-’ I began but stopped. The woman was gone. ‘What the hell! There was a…’

I stopped myself. There was no way that woman had been real, just like that spider hadn’t been real and I hadn’t shrunk. What was going on with me? Was I losing my mind!? Oh god! I needed to calm down!

‘Are you okay?’ Alexis asked as I frantically rubbed my face and eyes.

‘I-yeah.’ I swallowed. ‘I’m just…I don’t know. I need to relax like your mum said! And I’m really hungry too! We should order the pizza now!’

Alexis grabbed my hand and smiled. ‘Yeah, let’s go. You’ll feel much better after eating something.’

‘I hope so.’

‘Trust me.’ she said brightly and led me out of the room, her warm hand once again starting to calm me down. ‘You’ll be fine.’

I looked back at the corner of the room as we left, but there was nobody there.

 
Chapter 6

The next three hours passed by in a pleasant haze as Alexis, Nyoko and I hung out in the den. We played pool for a bit but after Alexis beat me four times in a row I decided that I didn’t like pool very much anymore and we spent played video games instead. I wasn’t very good at them either but most of Alexis’s games were co-op so it didn’t hurt my pride too much whenever I lost, although the fact that Nyoko was better at them than me didn’t feel good.

I’d felt a bit off for the first hour but as soon as the pizza arrived I devoured a couple of slices and felt infinitely better, just like Alexis said I would. It hadn’t settled well in my stomach though and as the night progressed I began to get mild stomach cramps, which drained what little energy I still had left. I slumped next to Alexis and drifted off into a light sleep, letting her and Nyoko focus on their game. I’d gotten the impression that Nyoko was getting annoyed with how badly I was playing anyway, and she seemed much happier with me gone.

I don’t know how long I slept for but I was woken up by the sounds of the front door opening. As I drowsily pushed myself up into a kneeling position I heard someone enter the bathroom, and after a moment Mr Nakamura came into the room with a pleasant smile. My drowsiness disappeared in an instant and I focused all of my attention onto him.

‘Hey guys.’ He said, brushing his floppy black hair out of his eyes. ‘How’s your evening been?’

‘Good!’ Alexis said. ‘We’ve got some pizza left if you and mum want some.’

‘Thanks! But we’re good, we ate at Erin’s.’

‘The roast chicken?’ I asked and he nodded. ‘Was it good?’

‘It was great. Your mother’s a fantastic cook.’

‘I like turkey.’ Nyoko said happily. ‘Turkeys are ugly but chickens are cute and it’s not good to eat cute things.’

‘That’s why I never eat lamb.’ I said and we solemnly nodded at each other.

‘What about beef?’ Alexis asked and I sniffed unhappily.

‘Cows are jerks. I don’t care what happens to them.’

‘Anyway!’ Mr Nakamura said as Alexis began to ask me something else. ‘Could I speak to Eden for a moment?’

‘Sure.’ Alexis said and got up, pausing the game. ‘Come on Nyoko.’

Nyoko gasped. ‘Wait! We’re nearly finished! We just have to find the DK coin and w-’

‘Nyoko! Come on.’ Alexis said and pulled her to her feet. ‘It’s time for you to go to bed anyway.’

‘No it’s not! What’s the time?’ Nyoko struggled against Alexis’s grip.

‘It’s eleven thirty!’

She stopped struggling. ‘Oh! That’s late!’

‘Yeah, it is! So come one.’

‘Alright.’ She conceded and Alexis let go of her. ‘Goodnight dad. Goodnight Eden.’

We said goodbye and then Mr Nakamura sat next to me, his weight pushing the cushion down and making me lean involuntarily towards him.

‘So, Eden.’ he began but I didn’t let him finish.

‘Is mum okay?’

‘Yes! She’s doing fine now.’ He nodded. ‘But s-’

‘Is she going to take me to Sanders tomorrow?’

‘…no.’

‘Why not?!’

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. ‘She’s worried your dad is going to hurt you if he sees you tomorrow.’

‘Then she should come here!’

‘She can’t. Your dad won’t let her see you by herself and she can’t sneak off because it’ll be pretty obvious where she’s gone, so she’s going to stay at home for a while. She thinks that if she doesn’t visit you then your dad won’t as well, and she can keep an eye on him.’

‘Can’t she get away from him for a bit then?’ I asked hopefully. ‘Like slip out during the day or something when he’s working?’

‘It’s a three hour drive to Sanders from your place. Your dad would definitely notice her absence.’

Crap. I’d forgotten how far away Sanders was. ‘Well…then maybe it’s fine if he comes then? He said he was sorry, and he really seemed to mean it this time! He even gave me money!’

‘Your mum doesn’t want to risk it, and I agree with her.’ Mr Nakamura said tightly. ‘Your father’s become more and more erratic ever since he found out what Jon had been doing to you and frankly, it’s just not safe for you to be around him anymore. It was probably never safe you to be around him, to be honest. I can’t remember a single week over the past year when you weren’t covered in bruises from his fists.’

‘Yeah, but..he…he doesn’t mean it.’ I said weakly and gritted my teeth as a cramp assaulted my stomach. ‘He just gets angry sometimes, and it’s usually my fault s-’

‘What?’ Mr Nakamura growled, making me flinch. ‘It is never your fault Eden!’

‘Yes it is.’ My stomach clenched and all the guilt I’d felt before reared back up. ‘If I hadn’t of kept that stupid photo then dad wouldn’t have gotten so angry and hurt mum. That was my fault. I know it was!’

‘That was your fathers fault! He completely over-reacted, just like he did when he first found out about you dressing as a girl. He takes things way too far.’

‘What about when he found out what I’d told the police about Jon? When he threw me against the hospital wall and broke my arm?’

‘What? Yes!’ Mr Nakamura said, sounding surprise. ‘Of course! That was one of the worst things he’s ever done! You should never have lied to the police about that, he should have been arrested!’

I clenched my fists to stop them from shaking. ‘I lied because it was my fault! Cos if I’d died like I was supposed to then he and mum would never have known what Jon did, and they’d be happy! He w-’

‘Eden, no!’ I jumped and saw Mrs Nakamura standing in the doorway, her face aghast. ‘None of this is your fault! You know that!’

The expression on her face filled me with a new kind of guilt and I stared shamefully down at my lap. Shit. If I kept talking like this I’d just upset her and her husband and I didn’t want to do that, not after they’d been so nice. I shouldn’t even be here! I’d messed up and now I was burdening them with my presence, it wasn’t fair for me to upset them like this.

‘You don’t really think that do you?’ Mrs Nakamura sat down opposite me and put a hand on my leg. ‘That your parents would be happy if you were dead?’

‘…no.’ I shook my head and avoided looking at her. Hearing it out loud from someone else made me feel sick. ‘I was just upset, I didn’t mean it.’

‘Suicide won’t make anything better.’ Mrs Nakamura said gently.

‘I know.’

‘If you’re feeling like hurting yourself the-’

‘I’m not going to hurt myself.’ I said quickly. ‘I was just upset but I’m fine now. I…I don’t want to talk about this…can I call mum and see if she’s okay?’

‘Your mother’s fine.’ Mrs Nakamura squeezed my leg gently. ‘Don’t worry about her. When we left she was just about to go to bed, so I think it’d be a good idea to leave her be for the night. She’s been through a lot today and needs a good night’s sleep.’

‘Can’t I call her just for a minute? I won’t even mention dad or anything!’ I looked up at Mrs Nakamura pleadingly. ‘I just want to hear her voice! Please!’

She began to say no but her lip trembled and gritted her teeth. ‘I…guess that’s fine. But just for a minute, okay? And I want you to promise me that you won’t bring up anything serious. ’

‘I promise.’ I said eagerly and watched as she pulled out her phone and called mum, then handed it to me.

‘Hello?’ Mum’s beautiful, tired voice lit up my ear.

‘Mum!’

‘Eden! Are you okay?’

‘I am! Are you?’

‘Yes. I’m much better now.’ she said brightly. ‘Alexis’s parents made sure of that.’

‘Are yo-’ I began but stopped. I was about to ask her if she was going to come to Sanders tomorrow but I already knew she wasn’t. ‘Uhm. W-when can I see you again?’

‘I was thinking that I’d see you at Sanders on Friday afternoon?’

‘Really?’ I gasped. Mr Nakamura had made me think that I wouldn’t get to see her again for a month or something! ‘What about…uhm…’

‘Your father’s going to be…he’s…’ she trailed off for a moment. ‘We spoke on the phone half an hour ago and decided that it would be best if he moved in with some friends at the end of the week.’

‘He has friends?’ I’d thought Jon had been his only one.

Mum laughed. ‘Yes! He does have friends, strangely enough. The guys he goes drinking with. He’s staying with one of them.’

‘Is he going to come back?’ I asked quietly.

‘I don’t know. But you don’t need to worry about that now, okay? We’ll talk about this more when I see you on Friday.’

I forced myself to not ask any more questions. ‘Okay then.’

‘Are you excited about tomorrow?’

I actually took me a couple of seconds to realise she was talking about Sanders. ‘Oh. I guess so.’

‘You don’t sound excited!’

‘It hasn’t really sunk in yet.’ I shrugged, even though she couldn’t see it. ‘Today kind of threw me off.’

‘I can imagine.’ Mum said sadly. ‘But tomorrow’s going to be a big day for you, so get excited! It’s the start of a whole new era of your life, and the first steps towards you creating comics!’

‘Yeah.’ I tried to sound excited but couldn’t muster up the energy, still hurt by dad’s words. My drawings were shit, he hadn’t lied about that. And now I was starting to doubt that the cartooning class would actually help me. You couldn’t turn shit into gold. ‘I’ll probably be more excited tomorrow when I wake up.’

‘Have Alexis’s parents told you about how you’re getting to Sanders?’

I shook my head and then blushed when I realised she couldn’t see it. ‘Oh, no! How am I getting there?’

‘They have to leave early and won’t get off work until late, so you and Alexis are going to get a train there for the dorm introduction meetings, then they’ll come by after that and drop off your stuff.’
‘Did you give them my suitcases to take?’

‘Yep. You packed everything you needed, right?’

‘I-’ My stomach cramped and I suppressed a grunt of pain, then continued speaking. ‘I think so!’

‘Well, if you’ve forgotten something then give me a call and I’ll bring it on Friday.’ Mum said through a yawn. ‘Sorry about that! I’m a bit tired.’

‘You should go to bed then!’

‘I am in bed! And you should be too, it’s almost midnight.’

‘Can I call you tomorrow?’

‘I’ll call you, okay? Around lunchtime.’

‘Okay!’

There was a brief pause before she spoke again. ‘Alright. I…sleep well, Eden. I love you.’

‘I love you too mum!’

She made a happy sound and then hung up. I let out a heavy sigh and ran my hands through my hair, feeling much better but still…not great. It was weird talking to her on the phone, especially after what had happened, and I was still upset about her not coming tomorrow. I knew why but it didn’t make me feel any better. And while it was awesome that I’d get to see her on Friday that was after a whole week of Sanders! I wanted her to be there at the start, to see my dorm room with me and walk around the grounds and have lunch together. That was what I had been most looking forward to tomorrow, not actually moving into Sanders.

‘Are you okay?’ Mrs Nakamura drew me out of my thoughts.

‘Yes! Thankyou so much for letting me speak to her!’ I said and handed her back the phone. ‘It…helped a lot. I feel better now.’

‘I’m glad.’ she smiled and got off the couch. ‘Now, why don’t you go and clean your teeth? I’m going to set up the sofa bed in Alexis’s room for you to sleep in.’

‘Thankyou!’

She smiled and left the room, and her husband got up as well.

‘You going to be alright?’ he asked and I nodded. ‘Alright then. I’m off to bed. I’ll see you tomorrow!’

‘Goodnight!’

As I watched him leave my stomach cramped again and I grunted in pain. They were starting to get really painful now, and seemed to be spreading out somehow, if that was even possible. My chest was beginning to ache too, as well as my liver. I really hoped I didn’t get worse throughout the night and end up unable to go to Sanders. After everything that had happened today, getting sick from eating pizza seemed like the most embarrassing way possible to miss out on my first day at Sanders.
Once my stomach calmed down I cleaned my teeth and then went to Alexis’s room, where Mrs Nakamura had just finished setting up the sofa bed. She gave me a hug and left after telling me that I should wake her up if I needed anything throughout the night. I thanked her and jumped onto the bed, rolled around for a bit and then burrowed under the covers. Mrs Nakamura had given me two pillows and I gratefully wrapped myself around the largest one just like I did at home. My head was a mess of worry and disappointment but my exhaustion weighted them both down and after a minute I began to doze off. Barely a minute had passed though before Alexis came in, called out goodnight to her parents and shut the door behind her.

‘Eden? You awake?’ she asked and I squeaked tiredly. ‘Did dad tell you about tomorrow?’

‘Yeah. We’re getting a train to Sanders.’ I mumbled and turned over to look at her. ‘We don’t have to wear our uniforms tomorrow, do we? Cos I think mine’s in the SUV.’

‘Nah, tomorrow’s only for people living in the dorms.’ She sat on the edge of her bed and looked down at me. ‘We’re going to have some kind of meeting in the dining hall and meet all of the dorm heads and their bosses.’

‘Have you met yours? Your dorm heads?’ There were six dorms, split in half by gender and each with their own separate dorm heads. I’d met both of mine but I only really remembered one, a kind old man with an oversized moustache that made him look like a video game villain. He’d been really understanding about my height and told me that he’d make sure that none of the older boys bullied me, and if they did to come to him straight away and he’d sort them out.

‘I met one of them. I think her name was Julia, and she was nice I guess. I just…’ she let out a nervous sigh. ‘I wish we lived closer so I wouldn’t have to stay there. I don’t know any of the girls and I don’t like the idea of sharing a room with a stranger.’

‘I’ll be around! And Reece too!’

‘Boys aren’t allowed in the girls section though, and Reece isn’t even in our class. I’ll only see you in classes and the co-ed common room and canteen. Beyond that, I’ll be spending most of my time with a bunch of strangers.’

The bitterness in her voice surprised me and sat up. ‘I thought you were really excited about going to Sanders.’

‘I’m excited about the biology and photography classes. Not the dorms.’

‘You’ve never said anything about it before!’

‘I didn’t want to complain.’

‘It’s not complaining!’ I crawled off my bed and onto hers, ignoring a painful cramp in my side. ‘I’d be terrified if Reece wasn’t going to be with me! I don’t know if I’d even be going if he wasn’t sharing a room with me, so you’re really brave!’

She looked at me sadly through her hair. ‘I wish I could share a room with you instead.’

‘I do too!’ I hugged her tightly, hoping that I was as comforting to her as she was to me. ‘It’s stupid that they don’t let boys and girls share a room. We sleep in the same room all the time and nothing bad ever happens!’

She laughed softly. ‘Not yet it doesn’t.’

‘What do you mean?’

She pulled out of the hug and looked at me seriously. ‘Well, okay. I’d never sleep alone in the same room as Reece, or hug him like this. I do with you because even though I like…I mean, because you’re…you…but one day you’re going to get older and…and be like Reece.’

I processed that slowly, not quite sure what she meant. ‘What do you mean like Reece?’

‘You know. Attracted to girls.’ she said after a moment, seeming embarrassed.

‘Why would that-oh!’ I finally figured out what she meant. ‘Reece wouldn’t try to try and kiss you or something! He’s really nice!’

‘I know, but I’ve caught him looking up my skirt a few times and a f-’

‘What?!’ I gaped at her. ‘He looked up your skirt?’

‘It’s not a big deal. Heaps of boys have tried to look up my skirt. Some girls have too.’ she blushed slightly.

‘Isn’t that scary? I’d never wear a skirt if I caught someone trying to look up it!’

‘You get used to it.’ she said casually. ‘Skirts are…weird. They’re annoying to wear but they look good, especially on girls with long legs. Dresses too. Oh! Have you seen the girl’s school uniform?’ I shook my head and her eyes lit up. ‘It’s amazing! All of the items are fitted, even the shirts, and the blazer looks so professional! But the dress is the best part, it’s short but not too short and the white hemming looks amazing with the white socks we have to wear.’

I'd never really found clothes all that interesting and as such was having trouble following what she’d just said. ‘What does fitted mean?’

‘It means that it’s tight, it hugs your body and doesn’t float out all over the place like our old uniform did.’ she said distastefully. ‘I am so glad I don’t have to wear that stupid thing anymore.’

‘My uniform is like our old one. It’s baggy and horrible, and is way too big for me.’ I said miserably.

‘You’ll grow into it.’ Alexis said confidentially.

‘I hope so.’ I began to say something else but another stupid cramp appeared, this time at the base of my stomach. ‘Ugh! Did that pizza make you feel sick?’

‘No, I feel fine. You don’t?’

‘I keep getting these cramps every now and then around my stomach.’ I said just as another cramp appeared near my kidneys.

‘Did you want me to get an aspirin?’ she asked but I shook my head, the idea of putting something else in my stomach making me queasy.

‘I think I just need to sleep it off.’ I said and crawled back onto my bed. ‘My body’s probably just tired and needs to sleep.’

‘Yeah, it probably does actually.’ Alexis said and got up. ‘I’m going to turn the lights off then, I’m going to sleep too.’

‘Do we have to get up at a specific time tomorrow?’

‘Well, we have to catch the train at one.’ she said as she flicked off the lights. ‘So we’ll probably want to be up by eleven. I’ll set my alarm clock but we’ll probably be away by then anyway.’

‘Probably.’ I agreed, getting under my bedcovers and hugging the pillow to my chest again. ‘Goodnight Alexis!’

‘Night Eden! Sweet dreams!’

‘You too!’ I said and closed my eyes, hoping that I’d feel better in the morning.

I didn’t sleep well. The cramps got worse as the night progressed and I started to wonder if they were even cramps anymore. It felt like my internal organs were being squeezed all at once, from my heart to my intestines down to my kidneys, and it felt disgustingly weird. After a while my head began to ache too, and a burning sensation started encompassing my body.

Dreams assaulted me every now and them, unpleasant ones about dad hurting mum and Alexis screaming at me for some reason, telling me everything was my fault, but they never lasted very long. The woman I’d imagined from before appeared in some of them too, asking me where I lived and telling me that she was sorry, that she didn’t mean for this to happen.

I gasped awake multiple times during the night and the burning sensation got so bad that I ended up taking off Nyoko’s clothes and sleeping naked, something I never did. I was too uncomfortable to be embarrassed though, and fear was starting to creep into the back of my mind. This was not a normal kind of sickness, at least not the kind you’d get from eating a bad pizza. Every cell in my body felt like it was on fire and the horrible squeezing feeling inside of me was getting worse by the minute.

Was this because of the spider!? Had it actually been real and poisoned me? Were my organs failing? Shit! They were, weren’t they! What else could this feeling be! Oh god. I was dying! I needed to get Alexis’s parents! They’d know what to do, and if they didn’t then they could call an ambulance and they’d definitely know what to do!

There room was upstairs though and I didn’t think I’d be able to make it in this state. I needed help.

‘Alexis!’ I croaked and pushed myself up onto my knees, my body drenched in cold sweat and shaking uncontrollably. ‘Alexis!’

I tried to crawl over to her but pain exploded inside of me as the burning sensation intensifying to the point that it felt like my body was actually melting. I tried to scream but nothing came out beyond a pained whimper and collapsed onto the bed, the last of my energy dying. My insides erupted into agony and I thrashed about helplessly as a pain I’d never experienced before wracked my body, both inside and out. My vision blurred and the sensation from before happened again, like I’d fallen off a cliff, and I was suddenly drowning in darkness.

It devoured me.

 

Sorry for the delay with this, I was hoping to post it on Friday but things kept getting in the way, and a small change I made earlier in the story had a horrible domino effect later on and I've had to rewrite entire segments which have had an even larger domino effect and...AGH >.<
My head hurts.

Eden's Reality

A small 14 year old boy plans on escaping his abusive father and the house where he grew up in by moving to a boarding school with his two best friends, but on the night before he leaves something unexpected happens, and he wakes up the next day a different person.

All feedback is very much appreciated :)

Chapter Seven

(So, I moved the end of the last chapter, where Eden wakes as a girl, into here because it flowed better. I altered it slightly but if you read the last chapter then you can skip the first few paragraphs if you want!)

The morning light slowly dragged me back up from the darkness and I opened my eyes, feeling far better than I expected to. In fact, I felt better than I had in a long time, as if I’d had a decent night’s sleep instead of the painful, fractured mess that had actually happened. My chest was a bit sore for some reason but beyond that everything was fine!

I guess it had just been some kind of weird pizza…thing. Indigestion? Whatever! I wasn’t sick anymore, thank god! That had been terrifying, worse than anything I’d ever experience before. What the hell kind of horrible pizza could do that to someone?

I turned over on the bed to see what time it was and came face to face with a seal. I stared at it stupidly for a moment before realising that it was Alexis’s baby seal plushy, for some reason now in my bed. I giggled at its cute, round face and large black eyes, and couldn’t resist reaching out to hug it. For some reason though my arms weren’t…right somehow…and they missed it and thumped against the wooden backing of the bed, then fell onto the beds fluffy pillows.

Something was very wrong. And as my tired mind began to wake itself up I started to realise what.

First off, I was naked. Which made sense because I remembered taking off my clothes in the night when I’d felt like I was burning. And that’d be fine if not for the fact that I was in Alexis’s bed!

The baby seal wasn’t in my bed, I was in hers! The sofa bed didn’t have a wooden backing and its pillows were large and thick, not soft and fluffy.

But worst of all…there was something wrong with my hands.

I stared intently at them and a cold feeling trickled down my spine. They was smaller than they had been, the fingers thinner and more delicate, and callouses that’d built up from my years of forest exploration were gone. My nails were longer than they had been too, were slightly curved at the top and far cleaner than I’d ever seen them.

My arms were thinner as well and not as long as they had been, but the scars were still there. I swallowed uncomfortably and pushed myself up into a sitting position, letting the blankets slide off of me to reveal my torso. I looked down and blinked in confusion.

My...my body wasn’t my body anymore. My waist was smaller, my hips wider and…there were small lumps on my chest, almost like…

‘W-what…’ I stammered and gingerly poked one of the lumps. It wasn’t too large, kind of like a flattish tennis ball. It was as if my chest had started growing for some reason, right where my nipples were. The lump I’d poked hurt slightly even though I’d barely touched it and for one horrible minute I thought that it might be a tumor, that the pain from last night was me getting cancer but…

Another thought occurred to me and I slowly pushed the rest of the sheets off of my lower half, took a deep breath and then stared down at it.
Then gasped and looked right back up. What the fuck!

It was gone. The thing between my legs, the disgusting thing Jon had kept touching, the…the thing men had…that Jon had…a p-p-p-

Wow, it’s finally starting to get hard huh?

I started shaking and crawled over to the mirror, hoping that I was just seeing things and my refection would show my body the way it normally was. I had to be hallucinating, there was no way this was real. I took a shaky breath to stabilize myself and looked into the mirror, hoping against hope that I was going to see myself staring back at me.

I barely recognized the face in the mirror. My cheekbones were higher, making my face heart-shaped like mums was, and my lips were thick and curved like hers were too. The bump in my nose was gone and it was smaller than it had been, making it far less prominent. My eyes were the opposite, having become slightly larger than they had been and ringed by the same thick, long lashes that made mum look so pretty. I also had similar eyebrows to her too, as they were now thinner and longer instead of just small and bushy. For the first time in my life I actually kind of looked like I was older than ten, but…

It seemed like all the features I’d inherited from dad had been replaced by mums, except for my hair. It was thicker and silkier than before but still a dark blonde and incredibly messy. An uncountable number of loose strands were poking out all over the place and thick chunk of them fell over my right side like normal.

The brown mark was still there, although it was thinner and longer than before and seemed to stand out more. For the first time in my life I found myself overjoyed to see it still there, as even though it was slightly different it was a definite marker than I was still…me.

I noticed other changes too, like my neck being slightly longer and the hints of an Adams apple that had been growing lately were completely gone. My shoulders had lost all of the muscle I’d developed over the past couple of years and were now slim and petite like my arms. In fact, my whole body was smaller than it had been. Not by much but I felt off-balance even kneeling down as my brain tried to adjust to my new eye height. I guess I really had been shrinking yesterday…and I’d shrunk even more now…

I avoided looking at my groin and inspected my legs, seeing that they too had thinned down, but were curvier than before, rounding off the sides and into my wider hips. They weren’t all that wide, but compared to before they were. Definitely enough to be feminine, but not as wide as mum or Alexis’s were. My feet were tiny too, but they’d always been small so that change was probably the least significant.

‘I’m…I’m not….’ I said stupidly and noticed that my voice was softer and slightly more high-pitched than before. I let out a shaky sigh and closed my eyes, took a couple of slow, deep breaths, then opened them again in the hopes that I’d see my normal, male self staring back at me.

A pale, tiny little girl stared fearfully back at me through a mass of silky blonde hair.

Oh god…this couldn’t be real…there was no way…no way…

I checked Alexis’s alarm clock and saw that it was ten in the morning, meaning that her parents had probably left hours ago. Had they seen me like this? Were they the ones that’d moved me into Alexis’s bed? Had they called my parents? I flinched as I imagined dad seeing me like this. Last night he’d slammed me against a wall just for having a picture of me dressed as a girl! He’d probably kill me if he saw me now! There was no way he-

‘You’re awake!’

I yelped in shock and looked up at the doorway, where Alexis had just entered. I’d been so lost in my thoughts that I hadn’t even noticed her standing there. She was wearing a white tank-top and a loose knee-length denim skirt over black leggings, and had put on some pink lip gloss and mascara.

I gasped, slammed my legs together and covered my chest with my hands, feeling horribly vulnerable. Alexis slowly walked over and knelt down in front of her, her eyes huge.

‘Eden?’ she asked, her eyes flashing over my body. ‘Is…is that you?’

‘Yes!’ My throat tightened and I fought off a sob. ‘Of course it’s me!’

Relief broke on her face and she let out a breath. ‘Ohh, thank god! I...I found you like that an hour ago and I didn’t know what to do so I put you in my bed in case….I don’t know! Fuck! Fuck! This is so weird! Eden! You’re a girl!’

‘I know!’

‘Did you…did you do something to yourself last night?’

‘I didn’t do anything!’ I cried and tried to stop my body from shaking so much. ‘I just woke up like this, like two minutes ago!’

‘W-well, have you been taking female hormones or something?’

‘What? No!’ I snapped angrily. ‘Why would you even ask me that? Hormones can’t do this in one night! And they don’t make…they don’t turn genitals into other genitals.’ I finished awkwardly and avoided looking her in the eye.

‘I know, but…’ she ran her hands through her hair. ‘I just-just don’t know what else could have happened! Boys don’t just turn into girls overnight! It’s impossible!’

My throat tightened again. ‘…is this real?’

She swallowed before answering. ‘I’m pretty sure it is. Mum and dad woke me up to say goodbye and then left with Nyoko like two hours ago, and I know that was all real. I haven’t fallen asleep since then and I don’t hallucinate like you do so…so this is real. It doesn’t make any sense but it’s real!’

I forced myself not to whimper and took a steadying breath to try and calm myself down. ‘Did your parents see me like this? Or Nyoko?’
‘No.’

‘Good. O-okay so…’ I rubbed my eyes, which were wet and sore. ‘I t-’

‘Uh! You need to put some clothes on!’ Alexis gasped and I realised with a jolt that I’d left my chest exposed.

‘Oh god! Sorry!’ I cried and covered myself back up as my face burned. ‘I threw off Nyoko’s clothes last night cos I got really hot and I don’t know where they ended up!’

‘I-It’s fine.’ She went over to her wardrobe and looked through it. ‘None of my pants will fit you but a shirt should be fine. You’re small enough that it’ll cover your…everything. Here. This doesn’t fit me too well anymore so it should be good for you.’

She threw me a white shirt with a cute black lamb on the front and I quickly slipped it over my head and stood up. To my relief it fell down to my knees and wasn’t as comically oversized as I’d expected, although it was still far too big for my body. It was infinitely better than nothing though.

The fabric seemed to be irritating my chest thought, as every time it brushed against my breasts it itched horribly, and I refused to scratch them. I didn’t want to deal with the reality of those things any time soon. I just needed to ignore my body and try to figure out how this happened, so I could find a way to fix it somehow.

I knelt down so the shirt didn’t feel like a dress as much and ran my hands though my hair, trying to figure out how this could have happened. I remembered all of the pain last night, but how would that have turned me into a girl? Hadn’t it just been from the pizza? If not, then it was from t-

Oh god!

The spider!

‘Alexis!’ I cried and she looked around at me from the wardrobe. ‘I think I know what happened!’

‘You do?’ she came over and knelt down in front of me again, her eyes narrowed intently.

‘That spider that chased me and Reece, it attacked me just before I saw you outside my house last night!’ I said and clutched my chest, the memory making me shudder.

‘What? Really?’ her eyes widened in concern. ‘Did it bite you?

‘Yeah! But I didn’t think it was real so I didn’t mention it but…it had to have happened!’ I said and then proceeded to tell her everything about the incident with the spider, from hearing the woman’s voice to it biting my chest to me absorbing its heart.

It…sounded insane out loud, and as I kept talking Alexis’s expression gradually changed from confusion to disbelief, and when I finished she just stared at me in silence.

‘Uhm! I know it sounds super weird but, it has to be real right? I was a boy yesterday and after I absorbed the spider I turned into a girl!’
‘I…uh…’ she rubbed her forehead and frowned at me. ‘It kind of makes sense, I guess? But why would absorbing a spider turn you into a girl?’

‘I don’t know! I don’t think it was a real spider though because it had a human heart and red blood.’ I frowned and thought back to the things the woman had said. ‘I think maybe it was a part of her somehow! When I first absorbed it she said something like “that’s part of me!” and
when I saw her in here she said something like, “what have I done to you?” and…and yeah!’

‘You saw her here?’

‘Mm! But it wasn’t real. Or! I mean, I don’t think she was really here…but…I…it was strange!’ I turned bright red. ‘But it happened! Like…ugh! Don’t worry about that! It’s not important, the absorbing the spider stuff is!’

‘O-okay…’ Alexis said slowly. ‘So…you think you absorbed her blood? And it changed you into a girl?’

‘Does that make sense?’ I asked hopefully. ‘Like, her blood has to be special if she could make a spider with it!’

‘No!’ she scowled and angrily rubbed her forehead again. ‘It doesn’t make any sense! People can’t make blood spiders! That’s insane and impossible! And why would your body absorb it, and how would that make you a girl? It doesn’t make any sense Eden!’

I put my hands on her leg and looked up at her. ‘You don’t believe me? I’m not crazy!’

Her expression softened and she put a hand on mine, but she shook her head. ‘I know you’re not crazy, but…there has to be a more rational explanation that you absorbing a spider! That’s insane!’

‘But it has to be true! Look at me!’ I cried, grabbing her hands and squishing them against my face. ‘This is real! You even said it was real before.’

‘You being a girl is real.’ she said, slowly moving her hands along my face with wide eyes. Her fingers gently caressed my cheeks and lips, then moved up into my hair. ‘Way too real. Jesus…you look like a younger version of your mum. And your skin is so soft and…amazing. I can only get my skin like that if I moisturize it every day.’

My face burned. ‘I don’t want to look like mum! And I don’t care what my skins like! We have to fix this! I can’t stay like this!’

She ran her hands through my hair and put them on my shoulders, a strange expression on her face. Kind of like the one she got when she was around mum and the one she’d gotten in the bathroom before, some weird kind of embarrassment. Or disappointment? What was g-
A loud ringing sound coming from the front of the house and we both cried out in shock.

‘Shit! That was the doorbell!’ Alexis jumped up and ran to the doorway.

‘Wait! Who is it?’

‘I don’t know! You should stay here though, just in case. It’s probably someone delivering something dad ordered online.’

‘Won’t they just leave it at the door if nobody answers? Do you have to go?’ I really didn’t want to be alone right now.

‘Yeah, but it could be important! I have to check! Sorry!’ she said and disappeared down the hallway.

I scowled at the empty doorway. This was just like the night before, when she’d gotten weird and ran off! What the hell was wrong with her!
No! No, that wasn’t fair. I couldn’t blame her for running off now, not with me like this. If I’d woken up to find Alexis as a guy for no reason I’d probably want to get out of here and…I don’t know…escape from the strangeness for a moment. I envied her.

I got to my feet and walked over to the doorway, hoping I’d be able to hear who was at the door. There was no way it was mum or dad, but maybe it was Alexis’s parents. What was I going to do if they saw me like this? Would they believe I hadn’t done this on purpose? If Alexis didn’t believe the story about the spider then there was no way an adult would!

Fear rose up in me and I instead ran back to Alexis’s bed and crawled into it, hugging the plushy seal to my chest. Maybe I could just hide under here if they came in and pretend I was sick or something.

What the hell was I going to do? I couldn’t go to Sanders like this! Could I? Maybe I could cut my hair and hide the breasts somehow? Even though they were small they still poked out enough to be noticeable through the shirt, but if I wore two shirts they’d probably be hidden. The school’s uniform came with a jumper so I could wear that! It could be enough to make me look at the very least gender ambiguous, like I used to be when I was younger. I could probably trick the other boys in the dorm if I was careful, and the heads and teachers too.

But what about people who knew me? Reece would see the change right away! And mum too! How was I going to explain what had happened? I couldn’t! And no one would believe I hadn’t done this to myself! I had to find a way to change back!

I hugged the seal tighter against me. Today was Monday and mum was coming on Friday. That should be enough time for me to find a way to fix this. That spider had turned me into a girl in under a day, so if I could find that woman then she should be able to turn me back that quickly! Right? She had to be able to! I couldn’t stay like this. I was a boy! I didn’t want to be a girl! I…

I…didn’t…

I poked my head out of the covers and looked at my reflection again. I really did look like a young mum, and she was beautiful. And that wasn’t just me being biased, everyone who saw her commented on it, and dad constantly bragged about it every chance he got. Jon used to joke that dad was lucky he got mum pregnant so young or she’d have never stayed with him.

I’d never understood why that was funny.

I crawled out of the bed and went back to the mirror to see myself better. If I grew up like this would I look like mum when I was her age? Would it undo all of the weird development problems I’d been having? I stood up and gently pushed the shirt harder against me so that it’d emphasized my body more. My waist was really small compared to my hips, just like mums, and my legs were long as well. There was a nice balance between my shoulder width and hips, and my breasts would probably get larger like a normal girls ones.

I…probably would look like mum if I grew up like this…

Was that…good?

A painfully empty feeling clutched at my stomach and I dropped to my knees, my eyes starting to tear. Fuck! This feeling was so familiar…I used to feel it all the time when I was younger, when I…

When I wanted to be a girl. I’d wanted to be a girl so badly that it’d hurt. I remembered telling mum that I wanted to grow up and be just like her…that’s all I’d ever wanted, to be just like her. I’d never understood why I couldn’t be, especially after the day at the zoo. All that had done was make the desire even stronger. She’d said I was like the daughter she’d never had and…and…

Then Jon had raped me.

And I never wanted to be a girl again.

A sob tore out of my throat and I turned away from the mirror, my vision blurring from tears. This had to be some kind of sick joke. There was no way that…that…

I dropped to my knees and rested my head on the ground, all of my energy disappearing. I couldn’t deal with this. It was too fucked up…too complicated…too…terrifying…

My body was so light and weak now…if someone wanted to do what Jon had done it’d be so easy for them. I couldn’t fight them off. I probably couldn’t have before, to be honest, but I’d looked like a boy then, and a kind of weird, ugly one at that. Now though…
I whimpered and clutched at my head. No no no no no no no no-

‘Eden?’ I looked up to see Alexis in the doorway, her face a mixture of confusion and worry. ‘Are you okay?’

‘No.’ I wiped my eyes and sobbed again.

‘Well…I think…I think that…’ Alexis came into the room and then looked back at the doorway. ‘I think that woman you saw is here.’

‘Huh?’ I blinked and looked at her, and then at the doorway just as a woman entered the room.

My heart leapt and I wiped my eyes again to see her clearly. It was woman I’d seen before!

I stared at her as she approached, for the first time seeing her in the flesh. She was tall, much taller than even mum, and had messy black hair that fell unevenly around her handsome face. Her pale brown complexion was flawless and enhanced her sharp features, making her look almost unearthly beautiful. There was a silver stud in her right nostril and two more in each ear, and even though I couldn’t see them I could hear some bracelets on her arms jingling as she moved. She was wearing a fitted black coat over a white tank top and I could see brown boots peeking out from under the cuffs of her black jeans.

‘Hi.’ she said, kneeling down in front of me. ‘My name’s Yani. We need to talk.’

Eden's Reality

A small 14 year old boy plans on escaping his abusive father and the house where he grew up in by moving to a boarding school with his two best friends, but on the night before he leaves something unexpected happens, and he wakes up the next day as a girl. The woman who he thinks responsible appears, but she's not as helpful as he'd expected

All feedback is very, very much appreciated :)

I am sorry for how long this took to get out. I've had a horrible couple of weeks and it's December so everything's been busy in good and bad ways. Plus this chapter was really frustrating to get right in my head and it took me ages for it to flow properly. I re-wrote it about five times before being happy with it and I'm so glad it's over and I can move on! Wah!

Chapter 8

It took a moment for Yani’s presence to fully sink in through my tired mind, but once it did I gasped and jumped to my feet.

‘Oh my god! You!’ I said stupidly and stared down at her as she slowly looked me over, her eyes dark and tired. ‘You’re real!’

‘I am. Unfortunately.’ she muttered and wiped some drops of sweat from her forehead. She was so tall that even kneeling down I was just barely taller than her, which I think was part of why she’d seemed so unearthly before. Now that we were face-to-face I could see that she was exhausted, with dark bags under her eyes and sweat littered along her face and chest. She was breathing as if she’d just finished running a marathon and smelt quite strongly of sweat and some kind of flowery deodorant that was so sharp it made me almost sneeze.

‘Uhm…’ I backed away from her. ‘Are you going to kill me.’

‘Don’t be stupid.’ she said and got to her feet with a wince. ‘Last night was a bloody shit-show and I have no desire to repeat it.’

I blinked. ‘A shit-show? What d-’

‘I don’t have much time so just shut up and listen, yeah?’ she said and then turned to Alexis, who was tensed up behind her. ‘And you too. I know I just barged in here but I’m not going to hurt either of you, so stop lurking behind me like some kind of bloody cat.’

Alexis relaxed slightly but an unpleasant expression appeared on her face. She came over and stood next to me, placing a protective hand on my shoulder. ‘Who are you? What’s going on?’

‘I’m about to explain that.’ Yani sighed and tiredly rubbed her face. ‘Fuck me. I feel like a sack of shit.’

‘…are you okay?’ I asked after almost a minute passed with her just rubbing her face and muttering.

‘I’m good. Just knackered.’ She sniffed and finally stopped rubbing herself. ‘Right. So, I can’t tell you much about who I am and what I do, but basically, I work for a private organization set up by a special individual, who gave me and my co-workers powers for…various reasons, and we help people. I guess you could see us as a kind of private military, if that works for you. One that works outside the government for the sole purpose of helping people.’

She stopped talking and Alexis and I looked at her expectantly. After she didn’t continue speaking Alexis decided to. ‘Could you explain that a bit more.’

‘No.’ She held up a hand as Alexis began to speak again. ‘I know how frustrating this must be, but just deal with it. I’m already on the verge of being fired for what happened last night and telling you two about our organization will just make things worse for all of us. Right now, nobody knows who you are or what happened, but if they do find out then it’s best if you remain as ignorant as possible so they have no reason to...do anything to you.’

‘What do you mean?’ I asked uncomfortably but she shook her head.

‘Don’t worry about that. I’m going to make sure that they don’t find out what’s happened, for both our sakes.’

‘I don’t understand.’ Alexis said and I nodded.

Yani frowned and rubbed the bags underneath her eyes. ‘Shit. Okay, look. Yesterday morning I got a direct order on my phone from my boss to kill you, without making any verbal or physical contact until your death was assured. So I did, because a direct order from my boss is pretty bloody serious. But an hour after you absorbed my flesh creation, my spider, the order was rescinded and when I asked my boss about it she had no idea what I was talking about.’

‘What does that mean?’ I asked.

‘It means someone set me up.’ she said, her expression darkening. ‘And I have no bloody idea who, or why. My phone disappeared just as I was about to ask my boss about the orders I received so I have no proof of what happened and she thinks I just randomly attacked you for no reason. They don’t know you somehow turned into a girl though, they just think I messed up the attack and you’re going about your life blissfully ignorant of what almost happened. Which, as I said, is good for both of us. They’re ignoring you and focusing on me, hence why I don’t have much time. I’m on probation, I’m supposed to be in the Mansion all day under doing fucking paperwork for god’s sake! If they find out I’m here then we’re both fucked, which is why I need to get this over with as quickly as possible.’

My heart leapt at that. ‘You’re going to turn me back into a boy then?’

She looked at me silently for a moment before gritting her teeth and turning away. ‘No.’

‘What! Why not?’ I gasped and grabbed her arms. ‘You did this to me! You have to undo it!’

She tore her hands out of my grasp and narrowed her eyes at me. ‘I don’t know how to undo it! I don’t even know how this happened! You should be dead, not a bloody girl! It’s impossible!’

‘How is it impossible! You can make spiders with your blood! That’s impossible!’

‘No, it’s possible because I have Ye-I have my bosses blood in me! You don’t. You’re just a human kid!’ Her cheeks turned slightly red. ‘And I make those spiders with my flesh, not my blood. They’re flesh golems. That’s not really im-’

‘I don’t care what they are!’ I cried, my throat tightening. ‘I need to be a boy again! I can’t live like this! My dad’s going to kill me when he sees me! He won’t believe that this was just an accident, he already thinks I want to be a girl! And I start school today! I’m go-’

‘I know!’ Yani cut in angrily. ‘And if you’d have let me finish before, then I’d have been able to tell you that there’s someone there that can help you!’

‘Who?’ I snapped.

‘Julia!’ Yani also snapped and then let out a breath, calming herself down. ‘She used to work with us but quit a couple of years ago, right when I joined. She hasn’t been in contact with the organization since she left but knows far more about…certain things…than I ever could.’

‘How do you know even know what school I’m going to?’ I asked.

‘I looked into you before I tried to…kill you.’ Yani said awkwardly. ‘We have access to a lot of me-’

‘Wait.’ Alexis said slowly. ‘Are you talking about Julia Waters? One of the girls dorm heads?’

‘Yeah, that’s her.’ Yani said and shared Alexis’s disbelieving look. ‘I know, it’s a bloody huge coincidence, huh?’

‘Yeah, it is! Should we even talk to her then?’ Alexis asked. ‘What if she’s the one who planned all of this?’

Yani shook her head. ‘She didn’t. I’d trust Julia with my life, so you can as well. She’s a good person a-’

‘Can she turn me back into a boy?’ I cut in desperately.

‘I’m not sure. If anyone can though, it’s her.’ Yani said and a small ray of hope broke through the cloud despair hanging over me.

‘Okay then! We have to see her! She’s at school, right?’ I grabbed Alexis’s arm and began pulling her to the doorway.

‘Wait! We can’t go now, the school doesn’t open until two!’ she said and looked up at Yani. ‘Have you even spoken to her about this?’

‘I have, and she said she’s happy to see you tomorrow at lunch. She’ll probably t-’

‘No! We have to see her today!’ I cried. ‘I can’t spend the night like this!’

‘You’re going to have to.’ Yani said flatly. ‘She only agreed to help you so long as it doesn’t interfere with her dorm work.’

‘Bu-’

‘I…think it could be fine, Eden.’ Alexis said and I looked at her incredulously. ‘We should be able to make you look more like a boy for the rest of the day, and you can just hide out in your dorm room for the rest of the night and to-’

‘That won’t help! Reece will know I’m a girl as soon as he sees me!’

‘We can talk to him, explain what happened.’

‘He won’t believe us!’

‘Well…’ Alexis trailed off and shrugged. ‘He’ll have to.’

‘No! This is stupid!’ I snapped and glared at Yani. ‘You have to help me!’

‘I have helped!’ she said and gritted her teeth. ‘I know it’s not much but it’s better than nothing, yeah? I’m risking my job by coming here! You should be bloody thankful!’

‘Thankful?’ A burning rage tore through me and my hands clenched into fists. ‘You tried to kill me!’

‘Not on purpose! I was set up! It wasn’t my fault!’

‘How isn’t it your fault? You didn’t even question your boss’s orders and were horrible enough to try and kill me! I’m only fourteen, what the fuck have I done to deserve to die?’ I was shaking now and my breathing was ragged and uneven. ‘Why did you try to kill me!? What did I ever do to you?’

‘I was just doing my job.’ Yani said, avoiding my eyes. ‘You don’t understand w-’

‘I don’t understand because you won’t tell me anything!’ I stamped my foot on the ground, barely thinking straight anymore. ‘You stupid fucking bitch! What the f-’

‘Eden, calm down!’ Alexis cried and stepped in front of me. ‘This isn’t helping anything!’

‘She’s the one who’s not helping!’ I snarled and pointed at Yani. ‘That fucking cun-’

‘You’re acting like your dad.’ Alexis said softly and I flinched, her words hitting me like a punch in the stomach.

‘I-what?’ I gaped at her and stepped away, disgust and shame filling me. ‘N-no! Don’t say that! I’m not!’

‘You are.’ She grabbed my hands and squeezed them. ‘You need to calm down. Getting angry never helps anything, you know that.’

I swallowed and pulled my hands out of hers, knowing she was right. Whenever I got angry I acted like dad and it was disgusting, I needed to calm down. I wanted to be a man again but I didn’t want to be that kind of man. But Yani was pissing me off so much! She was so rude and frustrating, constantly saying it wasn’t her fault and barely answering anything. What if she was just lying about being set up and was just trying to cover up her mistake by hiding me from her organization, when they could actually help? She seemed to be so terrified of losing her job that I could imagine her lying to me to protect herself.

But she said coming here could have gotten her fired, so why would she unless it really was to help? Maybe she just wanted to make sure I didn’t go looking for her myself and end up finding the organization, which would get her in trouble. She’d probably come here so I wouldn’t look for her, was sending me to Julia so she’d be able to keep an eye of me. I bet that was it! That made sense! That selfish jerk!

The anger got worse and my throat tightened again, making me gasp slightly. I felt like was on the verge of tears again and took a shaky breath. I needed to calm down. I did not want to cry in front of Yani.

‘Do you have anything else to tell us?’ Alexis asked Yani as I took a shaky breath in an attempt to calm myself down. ‘If not, then…you should probably leave.’

Yani frowned at me for a moment and then looked at Alexis. ‘Yes, that would probably be for the best. One last thing though, you can’t tell anyone that I was here, or what I told you. You mentioned telling your friend Reece about it, but don’t.’

‘What? How else am I supposed to explain this then?’ I gestured angrily at my body.

‘I don’t know.’ Yani shrugged. ‘Maybe tell him you were bitten by a spider or something and you just woke up like this. It’s almost the truth.’
‘No one would believe that!’

‘Then think of something else. Julia should be able to help with that.’

‘B-’

I was cut off by a sharp beeping coming from Yani’s pocket. She blinked and then pulled out a phone from her jacket. ‘Bloody hell! I need to get going.’

‘Wait!’ I ran after her as she went to the door. ‘Please don’t go! I can’t go to school like this!’

‘I’m sorry, but I have to leave.’ she said and looked at me almost pityingly. ‘Look, I know I’m not the nicest person and I understand if you hate me, yeah? But I am trying to help you, whether you believe it or not. Just find Julia, okay? I don’t know if she can turn you back but she’ll make things better. I promise.’

I looked at her in silence, scared that if I opened my mouth again I’d say something disgusting.

‘We’ll talk to Julia.’ Alexis said in my silence and Yani nodded her dark head one last time.

‘Good. Well then…hopefully we never see each other again.’ she said with a crooked smile. ‘I doubt either of us will be that lucky though. Oh! Which reminds me!’ She pulled a small leather pouch out of her jacket and handed it to me. ‘If someone from my organization makes contact with you then use this, yeah?’

I stared at her and then opened the pouch, which had a silver necklace in it. I slowly pulled it out and to my surprise found that it had a small engraved spider at the end, meticulously painted to make it seem almost life-like. The spider was an adorably cute jumping spider, my favourite kind! It had two huge black eyes at the front and a round, squishy-looking grey body at the back, with eight squat legs spreading out between then. The chain was coming out of its butt and made it look like its web, and the other six black eyes were evenly set around the main two. If I hadn’t been in such a bad mood I’d have probably squealed with excitement just at the sight of it. ‘W-what? What’s this?’

‘I bought that on the way here. I think we have some kind of really small connection, because I saw you last night. Only for a second though, but I think you saw me too.’

‘I did.’ I said slowly. ‘How come?’

‘I’m guessing it’s because you absorbed my blood. Julia will know more, but I can’t imagine it’s anything else.’ She gestured at the necklace. ‘Wear that and if you need me then squeeze the spider and think as hard as you can about me. Hopefully I’ll hear you or see you or something, and be able to find my way over and help.’

I stared at her in surprise, guilt defusing the anger from before. She…did want to help me? Oh god! I was an asshole! I’d been so mean to her! ‘I’m sorry! T-thank-you! I love jumping spiders!’

‘I thought you might.’ she said and then actually smiled. It lit up her face, making her seem years younger and the unearthly beauty from before reappeared. ‘And I…like spiders quite a bit, which probably isn’t bloody surprising, considering. When I was looking for something that’d make you think of me I saw this and thought it’d be perfect, so bought it.’

I grabbed her arm and looked up at her, feeling like I was about to cry. ‘I’m really sorry I yelled at you! I w-’

‘Don’t.’ she said and shook her head. ‘Like I said before, I know I’m not the nicest person, and I completely understand why’d you be so upset. But I am honestly trying to help you. You know that, right?’

‘I do.’ I nodded.

‘Good.’ She smiled again. ‘I really do hope Julia can turn you back.’

‘I do too!’ I let go of her arm and stepped back. ‘I hope that uhm…you don’t get fired? Or found out? I don’t know what probation is but I hope you get out of it soon!’

‘Thank-you!’ She nodded and lifted her hand in a wave. ‘I’ll see you around. Or maybe not.’

‘Goodbye.’ I said and she nodded, then turned and walked off down the hallway. Alexis came over and said goodbye too, and we watched as Yani vanished down the hallway and out of sight. When we heard the front door open and close I relaxed slightly, as even though I didn’t think Yani was all that bad of a person after all, she was definitely stressful to be around.

For better or for worse though, something inside me knew that this wasn’t the last time I’d see her.

End of chapter 8!

Thank you for reading! Sorry this chapter was short-ish, but it's primarily all exposition and I didn't want to drag it on too long and make it boring, or uncharacteristic for Yani.
Also I know some of this makes Eden look bad, but...for better or for worse (mainly worse) he is his father's son and he's got some work to do when it comes to controlling his anger and swearing.

Eden's Reality

A small 14 year old boy plans on escaping his abusive father and the house where he grew up in by moving to a boarding school with his two best friends, but on the night before he leaves something unexpected happens, and he wakes up the next day as a girl. The woman who he thinks responsible appears, but she's not as helpful as he'd expected, and he's now left to go to his new school

All feedback is very, very much appreciated :)

Chapter 9

I looked down at the spider necklace in my hands and wondered how I was going to keep it on my person while at school. Boys weren’t allowed to wear any form of jewellery and I didn’t want to keep it in one of my pockets, not something as important as this. Even if I couldn’t use it to contact Yani I still wanted to keep it safe. It looked expensive, and besides that, it was super cute! I wasn’t likely to wear it because, well…it was a necklace and a very feminine one at that, but it’d be nice to have it around anyway!

‘Can I see that?’ Alexis asked and I nodded, handing it to her. She looked at it with narrowed eyes for a moment before smiling. ‘It’s quite cute, isn’t it?’

‘It is! I…do you think that Yani…she was…’ I scratched the back of my head, trying to figure out what I was trying to say.

‘She was kind of a dick.’ Alexis finished for me and I giggled, not used to her being so crude. ‘But I think she was telling the truth, and…even if she wasn’t, we’re going to Sanders anyway so we might as well talk to Julia.’

I clutched at the sides of my shirt. ‘Do you think that I was too mean to her? I called her a stupid…a stupid…person.’

I flushed, unable to even swear now that I wasn’t angry. It was scary how much I changed when I got mad, and even scarier when I thought about how much I resembled dad in those moments. I really wish Alexis hadn’t of pointed that out…

She patted me gently on the shoulder and smiled. ‘Don’t worry about it. You were just upset and didn’t mean what you said. She understood. I doubt she’d have given you this necklace if you pissed her off.’

‘That’s true.’ I said and took the necklace back off of her, wrapping it around my arm to keep it safe for the moment.

‘How are you feeling now?’ she asked. ‘You don’t seem to be upset anymore.’

‘I’m not!’ I said and shook my head for emphasis. ‘I know why I’m like this now, kind of, and I know what I have to do to be a boy again!’
‘Yani said she wasn’t sure if Julia co-’

‘She has to be able to!’ I cut in. ‘If I was turned into a girl then I have to be able to be turned back into a boy! It’s like, like…if a cute kitten gets muddy then you can wash it and it’ll be fluffy and huggable again!’

Alexis stared silently at me for a moment. ‘Are you saying that you being turned into a girl is like a kitten getting muddy?’

I blushed. ‘It…sounded better in my head…’

‘It probably should have stayed in there then.’ Alexis said and then laughed in delight. ‘You’re a muddy little kitten!’

‘Meow!’ I beamed, putting my hands on the sides of my heads and flapping them like cat ears. ‘I’m a clean kitten, not a muddy one!’

Alexis stared at me with wide eyes for a moment before blushing and clapping her hands together. ‘Oh my god! That was so cute!’

‘Mew!’ I giggled and continued flapping my hands. ‘Mrow! Meow! Nyaa! Ny-ah!’

I squeaked in surprise as Alexis swept me up into a tight hug. The change in my size was abruptly hammered into me, as I just barely came up to her chest and her waist was almost as wide as my shoulders. My breasts hurt as well, squashed up against her stomach, and I tried to pull away but her hands wrapped around my back and held me there. She looked down at me through a blanket of falling black hair, her expression unreadable. ‘Eden…’

‘What?’ I asked awkwardly when she didn’t continue. ‘What’s wrong?’

‘Are you sure you want to be a boy?’ she asked after a while and I gaped at her.

‘What! Yes! Why would you even ask me that?’ I demanded and slipped out of her grasp. ‘I don’t want to be a girl!’

‘You used to though…’ she said softly and my stomach clenched. ‘Do you remem-’

‘I remember!’ I snapped and took a step away from her, out into the middle of the hallway. ‘But that was years ago, I don’t want to anymore!’

‘Are you sure?’ she walked forward and I backed away again.

‘Yes!’ I scratched my arm shakily and looked up at her. ‘Why are you asking me this? You’ve never brought it up before!’

‘I…seeing you like this…’ she trailed off and rubbed her face with both her hands, then let out a heavy sigh. ‘I know you won’t like me saying this, but I’ve always kind of seen you as a girl. You love cute things and you’re really excitable and playful and really girly and…just, you’re like Nyoko! Except that you’re not Nyoko, you’re fourteen and my best friend and…I feel so comfortable around you and…shit! Look at you Eden! You look right!’

‘I don’t understand what you’re saying.’ I said, very uncomfortable now.

‘You look like you act, you know? Like a cute girl. But you’re more than cute, you’re…beautiful. Really beautiful, like your mum.’

‘I don’t want to look like this!’

Alexis actually looked surprised. ‘Why not? Do you know how many girls would kill to look like you do right now?’

‘I don’t care! I’m not a girl!’ I was annoyed I even had to be saying this to her! ‘I don’t want this! I hate looking like this!’

‘Why?’ she asked quietly. ‘Because of Jon did to you?’

I flinched and jerked backwards, slamming into Nyoko’s bedroom door. ‘Wh-don’t!’

‘I…I know we’ve never talked about what he did to you, but my parents told me what happened. How he kept…dressing you up and...’ she swallowed and looked sadly at me. ‘If you’re scared of someone else hurting you because you’re a girl then I can protect you, Eden. I c-’

‘We’re not talking about this.’ I said shakily. ‘Please, Alexis.’

‘Eden, w-’

‘Shut up!’ I screamed and shoved my hands into her, attempting to push her away. She didn’t budge but it made me feel better, at least. ‘You’re being weird! We never talk about this stuff! Stop it! I don’t like this Alexis!’

She stared at me in shock and then shame flooded her face. ‘Oh my god! I’m so sorry Eden! I didn’t mean to upset you, I was trying to help!’

‘Help? How!?’

‘W-well, because heaps of people would kill to be in your position! Like, transsexuals and stuff, boys who want to be girls. Th-’

‘I don’t care!’ I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. The fear from before was digging into the edges of my mind and my legs were shaking badly enough to make it hard to stand upright. ‘I…I did want to be a girl but not anymore! I don’t feel safe like this! I couldn’t protect myself before and there’s no way I can now, and Jon…people like him will hurt me! J-J-you don’t understand!’ I grabbed her arms to keep me stable and looked up at her, tears leaking from my eyes. ‘I only ever felt safe before because Jon was gone! He was the only person who wanted to…to do those things to me when I was a boy, but now that I’m a girl heaps of other people will, and I won’t be able to stop them!’

‘The world isn’t full of people like Jon, Eden.’ Alexis said gently. ‘There are some people like him, but I can protect you from them. So can Reece, and your mum and-’

It’s your fault. You did this to me!

‘You can’t protect me from myself.’ I cut in harshly.

‘What do you mean?’

I shook my head and pulled away from her, wiping the tears from my eyes. ‘I’d rather die than stay like this. Being dead is better than what Jon did to me, what people like him will do to me! I’m not staying like this!’

‘Eden…’

‘I’m not talking about this anymore!’ I snapped and padded down the hallway. ‘I’m going to have breakfast!’

‘Oh. I can heat up your mums roast chicken if you want.’

‘No! I want to be alone for a bit!’ I heard her walking after me and spun around. ‘I said I want to be alone!’

She stopped and stared at me with a pained expression. ‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes!’

‘O-okay then. I’ll go and find some clothes for you to wear to Sanders then.’

‘Thanks.’ I muttered and turned away, trying to ignore the hurt look on her face. I’d never made her look like that before.

God damn it!

I really was an asshole, wasn’t I?

I wasn’t hungry in the slightest, so when I reached the kitchen I just sat down on one of the wooden stools in front of the bench and slumped over. The kitchen was large and neat, with a long grey bench curving around in a loose “L” shape and a walk-in pantry that was always fully stocked, unlike my own. There was a large window above the sink that looked out into the green backyard and sunlight was flooding through it, lighting up the area and letting me know that today was going to be unpleasantly hot. The silver fridge was gently humming across from me and I could smell the soapy scent of freshly-cleaned dishes emanating from the dishwasher, mixed in with the gentle aroma of freshly-cut grass.

It was unbelievably relaxing and I found myself calming down after a few seconds, the fear and anger slowly ebbing out of me. As much as I wished Alexis hadn’t brought up me wanting to be a girl, I guess I couldn’t blame her. Our whole relationship back in kindergarten had been based around me dressing in her clothes and us pretending to be sisters, and I knew that I acted more like a girl than a boy. But if she knew what Jon had done to me then she’d have to know that there was no way I wanted to be a girl anymore! Wouldn’t she? He’d forced me to dress as a girl, like his daughter, for years…constantly f…

I groaned and sat up, resting my head in my hands. I didn’t need to be thinking about that right now. Alexis couldn’t know all the details of what he’d done to me so there was no reason to get angry at her. I should talk to her about it one day, so she didn’t get any wrong ideas. Mum did seem to think that it might be helpful, talking to someone about what happened.

That wasn’t going to happen any time soon though. I needed to put it out of my head and focus on today, on avoiding Reece and Alexis’s parents and finding Julia. She was going to turn me into a boy and everything was going to be okay. In a years’ time I’d probably forget this had even happened and it’d just be a fuzzy, weird memory along with everything else.

I looked at the microwave clock and saw that it was nearly eleven thirty, half an hour until mum said she’d call. What the hell was I supposed to say to her now? I was more dreading going to Sanders than looking forward to it, and I was honestly relieved that I didn’t have to see her today. I was going to have to pretend that everything was fine and deepen my voice somehow so she couldn’t tell it was different. Maybe I could pretend I was tired, or sick, and wasn’t able to talk for very long. Ugh. I didn’t want to lie to her! But I had to, there was no way she’d believe me if I told her the truth. And she might tell dad, which would end really badly for both of us.

The suns warmth was making me drowsy and I slumped down again, wishing I could go back to bed. I felt like I’d been awake for hours, not just one. What a horrible morning it’d been…

‘Eden?’

I started awake as someone tapped me on the arm, not even realising that I’d fallen asleep. Alexis was standing on the other side of the bench with a can of coke in her hands.

‘Oh…I fell asleep…’ I murmured and rubbed my eyes.

‘Yeah, you did.’ She smiled. ‘I was going to let you rest until you woke up, but it’s nearly twelve s-’

‘Oh god!’ I gasped and carefully slipped off the stool. My body was just small enough now to make the distance from the stool to the ground not as easy to traverse as it’d used to be. ‘Mum’s going to call soon!’

‘That’s why I woke you.’ Alexis said, putting the coke down and coming around the bench. She looked down at me for a moment before blushing and awkwardly putting her hair behind her ears. ‘I’m really sorry about before! I didn’t mean to upset you, I knew I shouldn’t have brought up you wanting to be a girl and what Jon had done but…I don’t know. I was in a weird mood. I wasn’t thinking properly.’

‘It’s okay.’ I said uncomfortably. ‘I’m sorry too, I was really mean…’

‘No, you weren’t. I was the one who was out of line.’ She said and gently grabbed my upper arm. ‘Are we okay?’

‘Yeah!’ I beamed as she squeezed my hands. It felt so nice when she did that! ‘We’re okay! You were just trying to help me!’

‘I…I don’t know if I was…’ she said awkwardly and put her hands on my shoulders.

I blinked. ‘What?’

‘Eden, I think I need to tell y-’

She was cut off by the phone next to the fridge, which abruptly started ringing. I gasped and ran over to it, but just as I was about to answer I abruptly remembered that this wasn’t my home. I looked at Alexis, who nodded, and I smiled gratefully.

‘Thankyou!’ I grabbed the phone and tried my best to deepen my voice. ‘Mum! Hi!’

There was a pause on the line and then a horrible voice spoke. ‘Hello Eden.’

‘D-dad!?’ The last of the warmth inside of me immediately died, and an unpleasant iciness grew in its place. With all that had happened today I’d barely even thought about last night, but hearing dad’s voice brought it all back to me in painfully vivid detail. ‘What do you want? Where’s mum!?’

‘She’s resting.’ His voice was flat and emotionless. ‘She’s not feeling too well at the moment and I didn’t want to wake her just to call you.’

‘She said she’d call me though!’

‘I know. Which is why I’m calling you now, in her place.’

‘I don’t want to talk to you!’

‘Eden.’ he said in a pained voice. ‘I’m sorry about last night. I’d had a bit too much to drink and wasn’t thinking clearly. I already-’

‘Shut up!’ I slammed the phone onto the receiver, unable to handle hearing his voice anymore. I couldn’t get the image of mum’s face covered in blood out of my head and anger was pulsating through my head. Dad usually didn’t come back home for a couple of days after an incident like last night, and Mum had told me he was staying with friends or something! What was he doing home now?

‘That was your dad?’ Alexis asked from behind me and I nodded. ‘What did he want?’

‘I don’t know.’ I said shakily and picked up the phone. ‘I’m going t-’

The phone started ringing again and I almost answered it, but it had to be dad again, probably furious that I’d hung up on him. I hung it up again and then quickly dialed mum’s mobile.

‘What’s going on?’ Alexis asked nervously.

‘I’m calling mum.’ I said just as the call was answered. ‘Mum?’

‘Eden?’ Mum’s tired voice answered and I leant against the fridge in relief.

‘Mum! You’re okay!’

‘Of course I am! What’s wrong? Is everything okay?’

‘No! Dad called me!’ I cried. ‘He said you weren’t feeling well!’

‘Oh. No, I’m still a bit sore from yesterday.’ She said and I heard her rubbing her forehead. ‘My head is killing me and…yeah.’

‘Has he hurt you again?’ I asked fearfully and she didn’t answer for a worrying amount of time.

‘No. Everything’s fine, Eden. Don’t worry about me.’

‘B-’

‘Is that him!?’ my dad’s voice shouted from the other end of the line. ‘Are you talking to him?’

‘He called me.’ Mum said patiently.

‘He fucking hung up on me, the little cunt! Twice!’

‘Can you blame him?’

‘I’m his father! He should show me some fucking respect!’

‘Mum!’ I said and she muttered something I didn’t hear. ‘Mum?’

‘Eden, now’s not a good time to talk.’ She said after dad said something I couldn’t hear. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Are you going to be okay?’

‘I’ll be fine. I told you not to worry about me.’

‘But I made dad angry! He’s going to hurt you, isn’t he?’

‘Eden! Stop worrying.’ Mum said loudly and I heard dad say something again. ‘Look, I have to go but everything’s fine. You need to be focusing on Sanders now, not me.’

‘Are you still going to come on Friday?’

‘Yes. That’s a promise that I’m going to keep.’ She said confidently.

‘Can I call you again?’

‘…maybe not until I see you on Friday.’ She said heavily.

‘Why not?’

‘It’s complicated.’

‘Why?’ I asked and she didn’t answer. ‘Is dad still going to move out? With his friends? Why is he even there?’

‘Eden, I have to go. I’ll talk to you on Friday, okay?’ mum said sadly. ‘I really hope everything at Sanders goes well.’

‘It’s going to be horrible! Everything’s horrible!’ I cried.

‘Don’t say that! It’ll be fi-’

‘Hurry up! You need to be resting!’ Dad said loud enough for me to hear him.

‘Okay! Fuck!’ mum growled and then softened her voice. ‘You’re going to have a great day today, Eden. And a great week. Trust me. Sanders is going to be great for you.’

‘Mum…’

‘See you on Friday!’

‘Bu-I-okay…’

‘I love you.’ She said and then hung up. I looked down at the phone for a moment and then dropped it onto the bench, feeling empty. I wasn’t an idiot. Something was wrong with mum, but…I couldn’t do anything about it and I’d just made things worse by calling her! I’d pissed off dad and he was definitely going to take it out on mum. It was my fault, again! Fuck! Why did I always make things worse?

‘What’s going on?’ Alexis asked and I almost screamed, having completely forgotten that she was there. ‘Is your mum okay?’

‘I don’t know.’ I tugged on the shirt and looked up at her. ‘When you see your parents today can you ask them to check on mum? Tonight?’

‘I can call dad about it right now if you want.’

‘Ah! Yes! Please do that!’

‘I’ll go get my phone. I think I left it on the pool table last night.’ She began walking off but stopped to turn around ‘Oh! You need to get changed! We have to leave for Sanders in about an hour!’

‘That soon?’ I looked down at the shirt and uneasiness washed over me. I really did want to put something else on, but I didn’t like the prospect of undressing and wearing new clothes. Not with this body…

‘Yeah. I picked out a bunch of stuff for you to look through, so you should be able to find something that works. They’re on my bed!’ she said and disappeared into the living room, seeming to be in a hurry. Did we really need to get moving soon?

Crap. I’d been all ready to storm off to Sanders and find Julia an hour ago, but now that I’d calmed down I wasn’t so eager to leave the safety of Alexis’s home. Especially after speaking to mum. That had made me feel even worse, not better like it should have.

I needed to take her advice though. Focus on Sanders! If mum was in trouble then Alexis’s parents would be able to help her. And I’d see her on Friday so everything was going to be fine!

I’d be back to being a boy by then too!

Everything was going to be fine.

End of Chapter 9

Thankyou for reading!
This chapter...I'm not too sure about it. A lot of things were cut and it doesn't feel right, I don't know. But it's a stepping stone to more interesting things so it's all good ^_^ And when i finally finish this story I'll go back and smooth everything out to my liking as well

Eden's Reality

Eden is now a girl, and learns it has more of an impact on herself and her best friend than first expected.

This chapter gets pretty heavy at the end, but the following few chapters won't be as heavy. This is the last chapter before the story finally gets on rolling to Sanders!
Sorry it took so long ^.^'

(Note, I edited the end a little bit to make it less abrupt, and not as final. Just a few extra lines, just to make me satisfied. If you read it before and thought it was fine then don't worry about it ^.^ It was just to satisfy my anxieties. I hate feeling like I left something unfinished or incorrect.)

Oh, and I changed the title format a bit. All of the chapters have names (meow!) but because I originally uploaded 2 at a time I didn't want to make it messy and decided to just leave them out, but this chapter signals the end of the first part of the story (things that take place before going to Sanders) and those chapters will most likely be named as well. So I guess, I'm just adding the name and seeing how it goes :)

Chapter 10 : Clothing, kissing and cruelty

Alexis had picked out quite few clothes for me to go through, far more than I’d expected, and they were all arranged neatly on her bed. She’d put the seal plushy on the pile of shirts and I smiled when I saw it, gave it a quick hug and then placed it on the other side of the bed. It really was cute! I wished I had something like it at home, but dad had banned me from having cute soft toys when he’d found out I’d been dressing as a girl back in kindergarten. He apparently thought that they were having a negative impact on my masculinity and had decided that it was better if I had nothing to do with them.

The asshole.

I looked through the shirts Alexis had chosen and was relieved to see that they were all fairly boyish. There were plain-coloured shirts mixed in with a few flashier ones, but after searching through them for a while I picked out a slim white one that had no real defining features. It was actually blander than the shirts I normally wore, which usually had some kind of cute animal on them, but that was for the best. I was trying to look like a normal boy and as much as I didn’t like admitting it male Eden hadn’t exactly been the picture of masculinity. I tended to unintentionally draw attention to myself with my wild hair, androgynous appearance, cute shirts and feminine mannerisms. Right now I needed to act the opposite of how I normally did so I’d be able to make people think I was a boy.

I was…uncomfortably aware of what that said about me but I didn’t want to think about that right now, so I put the shirt next to the seal and looked over the remaining clothes.

There wasn’t much variety in the pants Alexis’ had chosen, but there was a pair of neat black pants that immediately caught my eye. They were similar to the ones I wore for P.E. lessons at school, made out of soft, slightly thick merino wool, but these were shaped differently. They curved in at the thighs, were wider in the hips and flared out around the ankle instead of just going down in a straight line like my boys ones did. They felt really comfortable so I put them next to the shirt I’d chosen and then looked at the rest of the clothes.

Which was all underwear. A couple of plain-coloured briefs and some bras, with socks scattered amongst them.

I looked at them for a second before spinning around, my face burning. There was no way I was going to wear girls underwear, or a bra! I didn’t care that my body was female now, I was not putting those things on. What had Alexis even been thinking! Had she…oh.

I look down at my chest and winced slightly. My little chest lumps were visible even through the loose fabric, so they’d definitely be visible through the tighter shirt. Did I need to wear a bra to hide them? I looked back at the ones Alexis had chosen and saw that there were two plain sports bras there, and they looked like they’d be tight enough to make my chest appear flatter than it was. I carefully picked up one of them, a thick black one, and held it to my chest.

And then threw it across the room as a horrible memory floated up from the depths of my mind. A memory of when Jon had made me wear his daughter’s bra, telling me that I had to wear it so I’d look more like a real girl. He’d been almost desperate to make me look as much like Miranda as possible…

I shivered violently and quickly grabbed the pants I’d chosen, unable to stand being so exposed anymore. They fit almost perfectly, hugging my thighs and hips, and made me unpleasantly aware of my new anatomy. I took a few cautious steps and winced as the seam dug into my groin and scratched against the surrounding area. It was a horrible feeling and I was abruptly aware of why Alexis had picked out some briefs for me to wear.

Well, whatever. I could deal with the discomfort, and if it was causing damage to the area then too bad. I’d have my proper set of genitalia back tomorrow and none of this would matter.

I slowly slipped off the shirt and let it drop to the ground, a sigh escaping my lips. It felt so good to finally be out of it and wearing pants again. They weren’t the kind of pants a boy would normally wear but they’d draw less attention than the now-oversized jeans I’d been wearing before. At least these ones actually fit, even if they were way too snug.

After a moment’s hesitation I turned and looked at myself in the mirror. The pants did look good, much better than I thought they would. I really liked how they widened as they went past my knees, and even though I didn’t like having wider hips I loved how the pants went half-way up them and curved downwards. Kind of like an elongated hour-glass. It especially looked good sideways, and I noticed that my back seemed to be more curved than before, and my butt was maybe slightly bigger.

I just looked at myself for a while, trying to get used to my appearance. Was it really possible for me to pass as a boy like this? Even if I did manage to hide my breasts, my face undeniably female. I’d seen boys who looked like girls before, I used to be one of them, but this went beyond that. If I looked younger I might have been able to pull it off but my face was older now, more in line with my actual age, and it was on the way to maturity. My features were soft but too well-defined, making them almost impossible to mask. I couldn’t do anything about the shape of my lips, the height of my cheekbones, the size of my eyes or the length of my eyelashes, nor could I really change my complexion. Maybe I could find a big hat to wear and just hunch down all day. That was certainly doable, and wouldn’t require any drastic changes like cutting my hair or something.

I doubted that shaving my head would even help as it’d just draw more attention to my facial structure, and I wasn’t sure that it’d grow back once I turned back into a boy. That was one of the last things I wanted, being bald and having my birth mark shown to the world. Maybe when I turned back it’d stay like it was now, small and thin enough to not really be a problem. As a boy it looked like I’d been punched in the face by an angry can of paint, but now it just looked like someone had swiped me with a thin paintbrush.

I pushed away the tendrils of hair covering the mark and was about to start messing around with different hairstyles when I noticed the scars on my wrists. Why were they even still here? Same as with the ones on my side and thighs. The wounds I’d gotten last night had healed within a couple of hours but these were the same as ever. They were even worse actually, due to my complexion being so pale. The scars were a deep, ugly pink and were easily visible amongst the sea of milk-white skin surrounding them. Why had my birthmark changed but these hadn’t?

And actually! Why the hell did I even have breasts for that matter? Didn’t girls only get them when they started puberty? I definitely hadn’t started puberty before I’d changed, I was sure of that. The only thing that’d changed with my male body over the past couple of years were the small muscles that’d developed around my arms and back. I had been starting to grow an Adams apple but it’d been tiny and hadn’t really grown or altered my voice. Maybe it had been a sign of starting puberty, but it’d only appeared a few months ago and these breasts looked like they’d been growing for like a year.

I…think. I actually had no real idea, now that I thought about it. My old school hadn’t taught Sex Ed and I’d nev-

‘You decent?’ Alexis’s voice came from the hallway and I gasped. She’d finished calling her dad!

‘Yes! What did he say?’ I asked eagerly as she came into the room. ‘Can he che-’

‘Oh my god! Eden!’ She stared at me with wide eyes and turned bright red. ‘You’re half naked!’

‘Ah!’ I blushed and spun around, throwing my hands over my chest. ‘Sorry! I forgot!’

I heard her laugh and sit down on the bed. ‘Did you find a shirt to wear?’

‘I did!’ I turned my head to look back at her. ‘But what did your dad say? Can he check on mum tonight?’

‘Yes! He and mum are going to drop by your place on their way home.’ Alexis said as she rustled through the clothes. ‘They’re going to have dinner with her and your dad so I think it should be okay. Your dad isn’t stupid enough to hurt your mum around them.’

‘No, he isn’t.’ I let out a relieved sight and turned around, making sure my hands were completely covering my chest. ‘Thankyou so much for calling him!’

‘No problem.’ She said with a smile, her eyes dropping to look at my chest. ‘Hey…so…I picked out some bras for you to wear b-’

‘I’m not wearing a bra.’ I said immediately and she smirked.

‘Yeah, I thought you’d say that.’ she looked down at the small pile of bras and began to go through them. ‘It’s the only way I can think of to hide your breasts though. Just try on one the sports ones and see how it looks. It won’t be as bad as you think, I promise.’

‘Can’t I just wear a jacket or something really baggy like that?’ I asked hopefully but she shook her head.

‘Today’s going to be really hot, in the mid-thirties, and you’d draw a heap of attention to yourself wearing something so warm on a day like this. Plus, you might collapse from heatstroke or something.’

I scowled and almost crossed my arms before remembering they needed to stay in place. ‘What if I wore a heap of shirts then? Like five or…no, that’d look stupid wouldn’t it! And it’d really too hot. What about tape then? Like mas-’

‘Eden.’ Alexis cut in, walking over to me with a sports bra in her hand. It was a small cream-coloured one that was featureless beyond a white logo on one of the undone straps. ‘Please just try this on. For me.’

I blinked. ‘For you?’

‘Yes.’ She looked embarrassed but didn’t turn away, her ocean-blue eyes locked with mine. ‘Wear it for me.’

‘Uhm…okay.’ I’d never seen her like this before and after a moment’s hesitation I took the bra from her, covering both of my breasts with one arm. I wasn’t sure why she cared so much about me wearing it but I might as well. I still felt bad about snapping at her before and she’d just called her dad for me, so I owed her.

I turned around and looked uncomfortably at the bra for a moment before slipping my hands through its straps and letting it fall against my chest. I grouped around my back to try and clip the back straps together but I couldn’t managed to, and after a couple of seconds Alexis’s hand tapped my back.

‘Here.’ She grabbed the back straps and began pulling them together. I squirmed around uncomfortable and she stopped. ‘Are you okay?’

‘Yes.’ I breathed, completely and utterly embarrassed. I felt like a little girl with her mum, trying on her first bra. But I a fourteen year old boy and Alexis was my best friend! This was so messed up! ‘Just hurry!’

‘Okay. Tell me if this is too tight.’ She pulled the straps tighter and I gasped but didn’t say anything, so she pulled them further and then finally clipped them closed. It was digging into my skin and was a bit too tight, but when I looked down at my chest I couldn’t stop myself from grinning. My chest was almost completely flat! The shape of my breasts could be seen through the cream material but they were flatter and didn’t poke out as much. It felt weird and uncomfortable, but it had worked!

‘Look!’ I beamed and turned to face Alexis, putting my hands on my hips. I felt so much better without those things sticking out of my chest! ‘I’m flat!’

‘You are.’ She smiled warmly and pattered me on the head. ‘How does it feel?’

‘It’s…it’s okay.’ I scratched the back of my head. ‘It feels strange but it’s not as embarrassing as I thought. It’s heaps better than having my chest stick out! I really like it!’ I looked at my reflection in the mirror and grinned again. ‘I look really cool, don’t I? With these pants and bra. Like I’m really fit and strong! I’ve seen girls dress like this when they work out and they’ve all looked really cool! I wish the bra was black though, this one is too…creamy. The black one would have looked heaps better.’

Alexis put her hands on the straps going over my shoulders and began adjusting them so they’d fit better. ‘I think you look more cute than cool.’

I puffed up unhappily. ‘Don’t say that! I need to look cool otherwise people will think that I’m a girl!’

‘So you’re going to just wear that to Sanders then?’

‘What! No!’ I frowned up at her smirking face. ‘I’m going to wear a shirt too, obviously. And socks and shoes! And I was thinking I could wear a big hat to hide my face with!’

‘That’s a good idea.’ Alexis nodded approvingly and I beamed at her.

‘I’m going to look like a super clean kitten again!’

She laughed loudly and patted me on the head. ‘Yes! Good kitten!’

My eyes widened excitedly and I put my hands on either side of my head again, then began flapping them about. ‘Meow! I’m a clean kitty!’

‘Ahh…’ Alexis looked at me warily. ‘Don’t do that again.’

‘Why not?’ I grinned and began pouncing about the room. I was feeling so much better now that I was wearing proper clothes, especially because of how good they made me look. I didn’t think I’d like the bra as much as I did but its tightness was strangely comforting and I was starting to feel like my old self again, like I had before dad had come home yesterday.

‘Eden…’ Alexis said slowly as I bounced into her side and grabbed her arm with a loud meow. ‘Calm down.’

I hissed and stared at her with wide eyes, then lifted her hand to my mouth.

‘Don’t you dare!’ she cried, but it was too late!

I chomped down on her arm and giggled excitedly as she tried to pull it free. She squeezed my side with her free hand and I squealed in laughter, allowing her to extract the trapped hand and grab me by both sides. I gasped and tried to escape but she picked me up and spun me around, then deposited me onto the edge of her bed. I hadn’t expected that and scrambled further onto the bed as she climbed onto it as well, accidentally knocking off some of the clothes. She pounced and pinned me to the bed by the shoulders, then leant down so her head was directly above mine. Her hair fell onto the sides of my face and I tried to push her off but wasn’t even close to strong enough.

‘I warned you.’ she said with a crooked smile. ‘And now…now…I’m…I…’

She trailed off and just looked at me, a strange expression on her face. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes shone with a strange hunger that I’d never seen before. I waited in anticipation, expecting her to tickle me and bite my hand or something, but to my confusion she didn’t move at all.

‘Alexis? Are you okay?’ I asked after a few seconds of silence slowly passed.

She looked at me for a moment and an almost pained expression crossed her face. ‘Fuck.’

‘What’s wro…ng…’

My voice died as Alexis leant down even closer, so much so that I could feel her breath on my lips. I became intensely aware of her weight on my waist and the warmth emanating off of her face. She was so much bigger than me…

My heart began to beat faster and a pulsating warmth appeared in my stomach, making my feel slightly light-headed. Butterflies appeared inside me as well, bringing with them the sweeping wave of affection for Alexis that I’d experience last night.

I…

I think I knew what it meant now…

‘I’d never hurt you, Eden.’ Alexis said, gently grabbing the sides of my face. ‘You know that, right?’

‘I-I do.’ I said breathlessly.

‘Then you trust me?’ she asked as she caressed my cheeks.

‘I do.’ I repeated slowly, my eyes wide with anticipation.

She smiled so brightly that my heart jumped, and she leant down even closer. ‘I love you Eden.’

And then she kissed me.

I’d been kissed before. By Jon. And when her lips first touched mine a streak of terror shot through me and I grabbed her shoulders, intending on shoving her away. But the panic immediately dissipated when I remembered that this was Alexis, not Jon. Her lips were softer than his were, and she was kissing me far more gently than he ever had. Most of the time he’d be holding me against a wall with a hand to my throat as I tried to get him off of me, and his other hand would be…doing other things…

This was far less painful.

Her lips pushed up against mine and I let out a surprised breath. She smiled at me and then I felt her tongue slip into my mouth and touch my own, sending a massive surge of pleasure through my entire body. I moaned and squeezed her shoulders as hard as I could, and she lent down on top of me. Another sure of pleasure ran through me as her breasts squashed up against my own, a form of pleasure I hadn’t even thought possible. A strange, high-pitched sound escaped my lips but Alexis didn’t let up kissing me, and I didn’t fight her. I didn’t really know what I was supposed to be doing so I just clutched at her sides, letting her control what was going on.

I hadn’t ever expected to enjoy something like this after what Jon had done to me, but the feelings coming from my body were completely different from when he’d done this to me. Was it because I was a girl now, or because I was doing it with Alexis?

I’d thought what Jon had done to me was normal, despite it being forced. Mum and dad were always fight and screaming but they still had sex, and it was probably like what Jon did to me. I thought it was how sex was, that it was supposed to hurt and never feel good for…for girls…

Because I was a girl all the time when Jon…hurt me…

And mum was a girl too and dad always hurt her so…so…

I thought there was something wrong with me, that it was my fault because it hurt so badly, and was so terrifying.

But…

But…there wasn’t anything wrong with me! It was violent and painful and terrifying with Jon, and that wasn’t normal! This was normal, wasn’t it! Doing it with someone…

Someone I loved…

‘Oh god!’ Alexis pulled away as hot tears burned my eyes. ‘I’m so sorry! I didn-’

‘He hurt me.’ I wiped my eyes and pushed myself up, still holding on to her sides. ‘I used to say that because it was easier than saying that he raped me but…but it was true! He did hurt me! We didn’t...this isn’t…he raped me! He raped me!’

Alexi’s eyes widened in horror and she hugged me to her chest. ‘Oh, Eden…’

‘It wasn’t my fault.’ I hiccupped and buried my head into her. ‘I didn’t like it and I didn’t want it. It wasn’t my fault!’

‘Of course it wasn’t!’ she said, stroking the back of my head.

‘Dad said it was my fault, that I seduced Jon and that I liked it, but just pretended not to so I wouldn’t get in trouble!’ I squeezed myself harder against Alexis, shaking badly. ‘And Jon always said that I was lying and that I l-loved it, and that if I ever told someone then they’d think I was lying or a pervert! And I…’

‘You’re not a pervert.’ Alexis said shakily, hugging me tighter.

‘But I liked looking like a girl though!’ I whimpered as pain clenched inside my stomach and chest. ‘Jon would always bring Miranda’s clothes with him to dress me up and…and I liked it! I loved looking like a girl and wearing girl’s clothes! Sometimes I even…I even looked forward to it! To him coming, just so I could dress up! I wanted to…I just wanted to be a girl! Like you and mum! I just…I just…I just wanted to be happy…’

I broke down and just sobbed into Alexis, and to my shame I could hear her crying as well. I’d never told anyone what I’d just told Alexis and, even though I was sobbing uncontrollably, something in my chest lightened slightly.

It…it was my fault that Jon had raped me. But, because I wanted to be a girl, not because I wanted to have sex with him. Those two things were separate now, finally, in my head. Everything Jon and dad had said were lies.

It still hurt, so much, but…

Here, in Alexis’s arms…

I could live with it.

It was okay…for the moment.

To be continued!

Eden's Reality

Synopsis: Eden meets her Grandmother.

NOTE: This chapter's end has been re-written, removing the entire "zzt' section.
Sorry for the edit >.<

Chapter 11

I snuggled into Alexis for almost ten minutes, too numb from crying to really have anything of substance to say. That was fine though, as the silence was so comforting that I almost couldn’t believe it. I’d opened up to her, not completely, but enough to crack open the doors inside of my heart and let some of her light inside. And it felt so, so good…

Alexis didn’t say anything either, just held me and rubbed my back every now and then. I hoped this was as comforting for her as it was for me, but I wasn’t so sure. She’d kissed me and had probably wanted to continue, but I’d ruined it by bursting into tears and telling her about the worst experience of my life. I can’t imagine it had been very pleasant for her, now that I thought about it.

‘Alexis…’ I said and looked up at her. She smiled and looked down at me, wiping away the last of my tears.

‘Hi.’ She rubbed the top of my head and I returned her smile. ‘We need to leave in about five minutes so we should get going.’

I nodded and slowly let go of her waist. ‘I have to finish getting dressed.’

‘I’ll go find a hat for you. And some shoes.’ She let go of me as well and went to stand up, but dropped back down with a blush. ‘Are we…okay? I hope it wasn’t too weird that I kissed you.’

‘No, it was nice!’ I said quickly, grabbing the white shirt that I’d picked out from before. ‘I liked it. Did you?’

‘I did.’ She nodded slowly, her eyes shining.

I blushed and hugged the shirt to my chest. ‘You…you said that you loved me…’

‘I did, and I do.’ She smiled, but seemed a bit embarrassed. ‘I wasn’t sure if I did or not for so long, but when you told me you loved me last night it made me so happy, happier than I think I’d ever been, and I knew…I knew right then that I loved you. I didn’t expect it, I’ve never been attracted to a boy before but I couldn’t deny how I felt. I think…’ She swallowed and caressed the side of my face, sending a warm thrill through me. ‘I think you’ve always been a girl, on the inside, and that’s why I was able to fall in love with you. And now that you’re a girl I couldn’t hold myself back, I had to do something so…I did.’

She turned even redder and I digested what she’d said for a moment. Then blinked.

‘Wait. Does that mean you’re a lesbian?’

‘Yes.’ she said after a moment. ‘I never brought it up because it didn’t seem all that important to our relationship, but maybe I should have, I don’t know. I’m sorry.’

‘Don’t be sorry! I don’t mind.’

‘I didn’t think you would.’ She beamed and then kissed me on the forehead, making me giggle and blush. Her lips were so soft and wet, like a puppy’s nose. ‘Can I ask…do you love me?’

‘Of course I love you!’ I gasped. ‘You know that.’

‘I know, but I meant in a…non-sisterly way.’ She waved her hands about. ‘You know?’

I thought about that for a moment. ‘I really liked you kissing me. It made me really warm and happy and…and excited somehow. And I like touching your body and feeling it against mine too! Is that, you know? Sex love?’

Alexis stared at me and then exploded into laughter ‘Sex love? What the hell is that?’

‘Wh-what!’ my face burned at she continued to laugh uproariously. ‘Isn’t that what you were talking about?’

‘Yeah, but don’t call it sex love!’ She shivered through her laughter. ‘That sounds so creepy.’

‘What else am I supposed to call it then?’

‘I don’t know. How about physical attraction? Sexual attraction. Romantically interested? Intima-’

‘Ah! Why didn’t you just say those things then instead of saying “you know”?’ I snapped. ‘You confused me and made me think of weird things!’

‘I did not make you think of sex love.’ Alexis laughed one last time and let out an amused breath. ‘Jesus. Sex love. You’re one odd little kitten, Eden.’

I brightened up immediately and place my hands on my head. ‘Meow!’

‘Mmmm. Meow.’ She purred and kissed me on the forehead again. She looked like she was going to kiss me on the lips again but to my disappointment she shook herself and jumped off the bed. ‘We can’t get distracted, we need to hurry.’

‘Do we have to leave so soon?’ I asked, regretfully getting off of the bed as well. ‘I was only going to Sanders so early to meet Reece at the entrance, but I can’t do that anymore. He’s going to be with his parents and I can’t let them see me like this.’

‘I know, but I was thinking if we got there that early we might be able to find Julia and speak to her before things get too busy.’ Alexis said, rushing to the doorway. ‘Put on your shirt and socks, then meet me in the entrance hall!’

I nodded and watched as she left the room, the reality of my situation dawning on me again. I’d almost forgotten that I was a girl now, so lost had I been in Alexis’s warmth. I wished I could crawl back on the bed with her and lose myself with her again. It had been so nice…

And maybe…maybe she’d kiss me again…

I blushed at that and a warm thrill shot through me, making me giggle. Oh my god! Alexis had kissed me! And she loved me, in a romantic way! Were we dating now? We had to be, right? People who kissed each other were definitely dating!

Ah! She’d kissed me! We were dating! AHH!

I squealed excitedly bounced around the room, lost in the memory of Alexis leaning over me. She had looked so beautiful, and her lips and been so soft and warm…and her tongue…when she’d…she’d…

The burning warmth that I now knew to be arousal flooded through me and I gasped, sitting down on the bed and pushing my legs together. I didn’t know if I liked this feeling or not. It was kind of like being hungry, but instead of just my stomach it was my entire body, tingling with excitement and…lust. I wanted to be touched, and kissed and…

Gah! What the hell was I doing? I was supposed to be getting changed, not thinking about…s-sex stuff! Crap!

I shook myself and then put on the white shirt from before, finding that it was quite long and loose. It came down to just past my hips and thankfully didn’t emphasize the new curviness of my body. A quick glance in the mirror confirmed that it looked quite good with the black pants and I smiled briefly, then grabbed a pair of black socks and slipped them on.

Just as I was speeding out of the room I remembered the money dad had given me last night, and the photo. I ran over to my discarded pair of jeans and checked for the money first, and when I found it I gasped. I’d originally thought that there’d been about two hundred but as I counted the notes I found that dad had given me four hundred dollars! W-what the hell…

This was way more money than I’d ever seen in my entire life. What on earth was I supposed to do with this? Had he been saving it up to give to me, or had he made a mistake and given me way more than he intended to? He’d been pretty upset when he’d handed me the notes…but most people didn’t carry around that much money in their wallets, did they? Why did he have so much spare money on him? He was always complaining about how badly the farm was doing lately and how he couldn’t afford to hire a farmhand, buy any new livestock or repair parts of the house. Surely four hundred dollars could help with that stuff, right? Why…

Ugh. Whatever! I didn’t understand finances enough to be able to come to a proper conclusion, and now wasn’t the time for it anyway. I slipped the notes into the back pocket of the pants, which had a small zipper on it to keep them secure, and then put the photo in after them. I was tempted to look at it but resisted the urge, knowing that it’d only upset me. I took Yani’s necklace off my wrist and put it into my back pocket as well, not really knowing any better place for it.

I quickly glanced around the room for anything else I might have forgotten about and then rushed off to the entrance hall. I arrived just as Alexis was hurrying down the stairs. I noticed that she’d removed her black leggings, probably because of the heat, and was wearing a pair of white sneakers. She was holding a large black flat-cap, one of those hats that had a kind of baggy head section and a small brim. I’d seen her mum wearing it every now and then and it definitely seemed suitable for disguising my identity with.

‘I grabbed those shoes from Nyoko’s room.’ she said as she came down the stairs, pointing past me to the door. ‘If they don’t fit then we might have to buy some on the way there. Your old ones won’t fit you either, will they?’

I turned to look to where she was pointing and saw a pair of brown sneakers next to the door. ‘No. if Nyoko’s don’t fit then there’s no way mine would now.’

I quickly tried them on and to my relief they fit decently enough. They were a bit loose but not enough that they’d come off just from walking or jogging. I might have some trouble if I had to start running but I couldn’t imagine that I’d need to.

‘Good!’ Alexis smiled as she came over from the stairs. ‘I hoped they might fit, Nyoko has pretty small feet. Now here, stand still.’

I did so and she pushed my hair behind my ears, and then carefully put the hat onto my head. It was so large that it initially slipped past my ears and covered my eyes, but Alexis quickly pulled it back up with a laugh as I spluttered unhappily. I moved it around a bit to make it comfortable but it was too big and wouldn’t stay still on the top of my head, so I ended up having to keep it angled down over the left side of my face. Some of my vision was obscured but I could see well enough to safely move around.

‘What do you think?’ I asked Alexis, putting my hands on my hips and staring up at her. ‘Can you tell that I’m a girl?’

She looked at me for a moment and then smiled tightly. ‘…yeah, you can. It actually looks really cute like that. Very stylish.’

‘It’s not supposed to be stylish.’ I muttered and turned it to the front again, where it drooped over my face. ‘Gah! Why is this hat so weird!’
‘It’s not weird, just too big.’ Alexis said as she slipped it back to the side. ‘And I don’t think it should matter too much, you’ll be fine if you keep your head down and don’t look at anyone. That was what you were planning on doing anyway, yeah?’

‘It was…’ I nodded, holding onto the hat with both hands. I definitely felt more secure wearing it but I felt like it was more stylistic than it was feature-obscuring. ‘Do you think if I just keep my head down I won’t draw attention to myself, even in the boy’s dorm?

She scratched her head and thought about that for a moment. ‘I don’t really know, to be honest. Even in those clothes you can still see how small and skinny you are, and your hair’s really silky and quite long for a boys. The hat does help though, so I think if you just keep your head down and stay in your dorm room all night it should be fine.’

‘What about the introduction meeting assembly thing today? Should I go to that?’

‘Oh! Yes, you have to go to that.’ She said intently. ‘It’s really important that you don’t miss it, because that’s when we’ll meet all the staff and go through the rules and dorm activities. We’re going to have dinner right after too, along with the staff, so that might be a good chance to talk to Julia.’

I squirmed uneasily at that. There were close to a hundred students living in the dorms, fifty boys and fifty girls separated into four huge dorm houses. How was I supposed to be around so many people and hide the fact that I was a girl from them? And all of the staff as well, what if they didn’t believe that I was who I said I was? My student ID had a picture of me from when it was taken and I didn’t look like that anymore, not really. I didn’t even have it on me at the moment, it was in my suitcase with the Alexis’s parents at the moment.

Ah! Alexis’ parents! I was going to have to avoid them today, and after everything they’d done for me that felt like such a mean thing to do. I wasn’t even going to be able to thank them, and worse, by deliberately avoiding them I’d seem ungrateful! Oh no…

‘Eden?’ Alexis asked and I realised she’d said something else but I hadn’t registered it. I looked up and her and smiled, not wanting to burden her with my problems any more than I already had. ‘We need to go. Do you have everything you need?’

‘I think so.’ I said and looked warily at the door, my heart beginning to beat faster. Once I went outside I wouldn’t be safe anymore, not like I was in here. There were going to be so many people around, not just at Sanders but on the way there too. And I’d never caught a train without mum before. What was I going to do if a stranger sat next to me? A male stranger! What if he was like Jon? What if he tried to talk to me? Or t-t-touc-

‘Uhm!’ I flinched and clutched at the hat. ‘You’re sure that I’ll look like a boy if I just keep my head down and don’t say anything? Nobody will pay me any attention and try to talk to me or…or hurt me? Even on the train? What happens if someone figures out that I’m a girl? What do I do then? What am I supposed to say? Should I pretend I really am a girl or tell them I’m a boy? Will they believe me and go away? Or-’

‘It’ll be okay.’ Alexis put her hands on my shaking shoulders and gently squeezed them. ‘I won’t let anything bad happen to you. I’m going to be by your side all the way to Sanders, and when we get there Reece will be with you when I can’t be. It’s going to be okay, Eden. Don’t worry. We’ll protect you, just like we’ve always done. I promise.’

I grimaced and pulled down on the hat, believing her but not really feeling much better. ‘Yeah but…what if some-’

‘Eden.’ Alexis swept me up into a hug, actually lifting me off the ground so that our chests squashed together. I gasped and hugged her back, completely forgetting what I’d been about to say. Her chest was so soft and squishy, but firm and…ah…uhm…

My mind went blank for a moment, lost in the feeling of her chest against mine. And my legs, wrapped around her waist…

A new sensation appeared in my abdomen and I impulsively pulled myself harder against her, trying to…to…I don’t know…

Something…I needed to feel her more, somehow. M-

‘I’ll look after you.’ she said softly, her breath brushing against my nose and making it twitch curiously. ‘You trust me, right?’

‘Y-yes!’ I nodded, blushing as I remembered what had happened the last time she’d asked me that. I expected her to kiss me again but to my extreme disappointment she carefully put me back on the ground and grabbed my hand. ‘Huh?’

She squeezed my hand and grinned. ‘Let’s go!’

‘O-okay!’ I said as she walked to the door, gently pulling along after her. I tottered after her, my mind still a fuzzy mess of warmth and lust. My heart was thumping through my chest and I felt far warmer than I had before, almost to the point of burning.

Augh…

Why couldn’t we have just stayed at her place all day? I needed...

I needed more...