Home can be a lot of things, but sometimes its just the place you sleep. The gang are back in the great US of A at last. Events unfold including but not limited to: Sarah giving Hannah's cold shoulder a poke (not that it helps much) And Hannah gets a bit too close to a mythical mountain.

“Never again..”

My groan got Sarah’s attention, she slowed down her shuffle across the car park to keep pace with me.
“Stop being a baby. We didn't have a single rough flight.”

I groaned louder but stopped quickly to cup my belly instead
“Tell that to my stomach”

Sarah twitched hard and glared at me in warning.
“I swear if you puke in my car, I'm gonna slap you!”

She looked like she’d do it too.

“..See if I put the effort in to save you next time, this is the sympathy I get..”
I trailed off into grumbling when her glare focused back on me again.

Never again!
I don’t care if it brings half the world’s magic users to my doorstep, next time I’m warping home!

==========

“Com’ on sleepy head”
I groaned and tried to wave her away.

She never lets me sleep in.

After a moment’s pause something slapped my butt hard and I jolted up with a yelp.
“Damn it Sarah stop doing that!”
She danced away from me on her crutches with a mischievous grin.
“Pee break, you've been sleeping for hours”
My jaw cracked in a yawn and I swayed dazedly.

For some reason I'm in the back seat of a car..
Sarah’s car I think..
Why am I.. oh.. yeah.
“I hate planes..”

Sarah looked amused for some reason.
“So you've told me.. repeatedly.. for each plane we boarded”

She gave my foot a tug.
“Come on, UP missy!”

I growled at her but shuffled out of the car door to stand up anyway.
Good thing we’ve stopped, I need to pee..
.. oh yeah.. that..
THIS is gonna be interesting.

Sarah turned around and led the way into the services.
I followed behind her reluctantly.

===========

The stall door slammed loudly behind me and I staggered over to the sinks.
My hair looked perfect in the mirror but I could feel that underneath the illusion it was a mess.

Sarah took a bit longer to make her way out, the crutches were awkward to fit into a stall from the looks of it.

“..Women are gross”
Sarah turned on the tap to wash her hands without comment, but glared at me warningly in the mirror.
I threw my hands up in defence and tried to look innocent.
“Just an observation!.. toilet paper is like sandpaper too”
She winced a little and nodded reluctantly in agreement .

“When are you gonna..?”
She waved her hand at her face to show what she meant.
I frowned and twitched a hand toward the rough choker I’d made to hold the enchantment in place.
“Gonna leave it till it dies out. I need to know how long it will last.. amazed it’s lasted this long honestly”

Sarah nodded but before she could speak the door opened and an older woman walked in.
She glanced at us for a moment but headed over to the end stall without comment.

“Come on, Tor’s probably waiting. I’ll buy you a burger and we’ll head out again”

I gave the mirror, with my old ‘clone of Sarah’ face in it, one more fond glance.
Then nodded to myself and followed her out.

===========

“Wha’ time’s it?”
Sarah glanced at me over her shoulder.
“Two-thirty, your illusion faded about three hours ago. We figured we’d let you sleep”

I grunted and ran a hand over my face.
It felt weird still, my cheeks were too puffy, I'm never going to get used to that..

“Fourteen hours in flights, two short layovers, and.. how long have we been driving?”
Sarah shrugged a little.

Tor shifted gear in the driver’s seat.
“About nine hours total, we hit some traffic near Sacramento.”
I grunted and lay my head back down

The face illusion lasted about twenty-one hours then.. I can work with that..
I must have missed a decimal somewhere, the illusion was only meant to last for fifteen hours, at best.

“Don’t go back to sleep. We’re gonna stop off in Cottonwood for food in about twenty minutes”

I grunted and rolled myself up into a sitting position to stare out the window instead.
The parched grass dotted with little puffs of tree whizzing past and my eyes merged them into one long blur.
Every once in a while a few cars or a billboard would break the rhythm but I just leaned my head on the glass and focused on staying awake.
At least I didn't feel ill any more, sleep helps with that when I fly, shame I couldn't sleep while we were flying really.

============

We pulled off the Freeway on exit 664.
The sign for it perked me up a little.
I remember that sign.

“Cottonwood, is this where dad used to pull in for breakfast when he went fishing?”
Sarah shifted in her seat and looked at me in confusion.
“What?”

It took me a moment to realise why she didn't get what I meant.
“You might have been too young”
She frowned at me.

“We’re the same age.. no, you’re younger than me now..”
She started off sounding mad but trailed off thoughtfully with a smug smile.
Obviously she thought I was insulting her and felt the need to retaliate.
She needs to stop with this teasing stuff, I'm all for not addressing the elephant in the room but all this fake happiness about my change is annoying.

Tor silently pulled the car around to take us up across the overpass and back down on the other side, stopping short at the lights.

“I didn't mean it like that, he stopped taking us with him after the incident with the catfish.”
Sarah querked an eyebrow at me, unimpressed.
“We were like three years old, I figured you wouldn't remember it that’s all!”
She settled back into her seat and pouted to herself.

“Why do you think I wouldn't remember if you do?”
The lights changed and we rolled on to the next set, Tor shifted us into the left-hand lane so we could turn off for the little shopping mall.

I moved awkwardly in my seat and looked at the back of Sarah’s head.
“I'm not being mean Sarah, you know I've always remembered stuff better then you.”
She didn't turn around.
“Since.. since my awakening.. the second one. Stuffs been a lot clearer in my head then it was before. Feels like I relived my whole life on top of everything else..”
She didn't answer me but her shoulders lost a little tension so I figured she understood my point at least.

We pulled into the little mall and Tor swung us around into an open parking spot.
There were a lot of them around, business can’t be booming here.
Either that or we managed to come on the day no-one else needs to get food in Cottonwood.

Sarah sighed and her shoulders eased even more.
She turned around to me and smiled a little.
“What do you want then? From the looks of it we have a Subway, two types of pizza place, a coffee place or we could get sandwich stuff from the Grocery.”

I glanced around at the shops and made a considering sound from the back of my throat.
Most of them looked a bit run down.
I know they could be perfectly fine inside but my first instinct was to play it safe and go for the nice freshly painted Subway instead.

Sarah pulled a face I recognised.
She wants Pizza.
She ALWAYS wants Pizza.

“I guess, I’d like some Pizz-AHHH!”
My brand burned hard, it was so bad I couldn't breath!

I rolled around in the back seat trying desperately to make it stop.
Sarah and Tor were shouting but I couldn't tell what.

========

After an unbearable lifetime, the burn faded.
I laid out flat on the seat and breathed heavily.

“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!”
I flinched at Sarah’s volume but tried not to move myself too much, just in case.
“Binding.. It should have been on the video.”
My breathing wasn't steady enough for me to say much more.
Sarah glanced at Tor in confusion, he shrugged helplessly but seemed thoughtful.
After a moment of silence he answered her for me anyway, I almost felt tempted to mark it up as another time I owed him.
“I listened to the video a few more times last night, from the sound of it this Maxarimus guy traded you’re life for Hannah swearing to never tell a lie about her feelings again”

I greedily sucked in a few breaths and tapped his seat to show I’d pick up from there for him.
“He used magic to make sure I didn't break my vow, it’s the same stuff that put you in your coma and changed me into this”
My hand waved vaguely at my body but I didn't sit up yet.

Sarah looked ill.
“That’s so messed up.. Are you gonna be okay?”
I grunted and reluctantly rolled myself back into a sitting position.
“I’ll get over it. It’s just painful for a while, it fades pretty quickly”
She squinted at me, seeming to weight my words against some kind of truth scale only she knew of.

“What set it off?”
I sighed and she frowned at me warningly.

I didn't need to be told that lying would be a bad option at this point.
I don’t think I'm going to even attempt lying again to be honest, it’s too easy to slip out the wrong lie.. I do NOT want to have to go through THAT again any time soon.

“The pizza thing. I wanted Subway but you wanted pizza, so I said I did too”

Sarah glared at me for a moment, with a little huff she turned around in her seat a little more.
“I thought you liked pizza?”
I grimaced and looked to Tor for some help.

He didn't seem to get what I was subtly telling him.
If we’re keeping him around I'm going to have to teach him twin speak..

“It’s alright sometimes”
Sarah looked upset.
“All this time we’ve been having pizza and you don’t even like it?”
I shrugged carefully and popped the door open to get out.
My back was aching a little, I needed to walk it off for a bit.

Sarah got out quickly to follow me.
She was still frowning so I guess we can’t just drop this.
“What the hell Han? Why didn't you say anything?”

I paced in a circle and grimaced.
“Because I wanted to make you ha-”
There was a build-up of pressure in my spine.
I could JUST feel the beginnings of another burn coming up.

Sarah looked at me weirdly when I stood still for a few moments without saying anything.
Slowly the pressure eased and I sighed in relief.
Apparently, if I catch myself soon enough and don’t actually voice the lie, the burn can be avoided.
That’s useful to know.

“What’s-”
I looked up at her apologetically and she stopped talking.

“I originally did it because I was convinced that it was what you wanted and..”
I really didn't want to tell her this.
My head ducked down a little in embarrassment.
Eventually I managed to look back up at her but she still looked a little worried.

“I figured.. with mum and stuff.. well.. ’Sarah always gets her way’, what was the point in arguing, ya know?”

I cringed.
It looked like Sarah was going to cry or something.
She slowly moved closer, pulling me into a tight hug.

“Sorry” I muttered self-consciously.
She moved my head so it was resting on her collar bone.

“Oh Al..”
Sarah sighed with regret.
“I'm the one that should be sorry. I didn't even think..”

We both stood there in a silent hug for a while.
It felt nice.

==========

“Sure ya don’ wan’ one?”
I grimaced and waved her off.
Sarah eating pizza is disgusting, she talks with her mouthful and everything.

Tor chuckled to himself from the driver’s seat and took a big bite of his own pizza.
He’s obviously seen her eat like this before, probably thinks it’s cute or something.
They both keep sharing ‘looks’ every once in a while, then glancing away quickly afterwards.

It’s driving me insane!

I took a nice big bite of my Sub, to hide my annoyance.
Tuna and mayo, Italian foot-long with cucumber and green peppers.
Trust me, it’s sooo good.
Some country should have made this their national dish by now!

For a moment I forgot to be mad and just enjoyed the Tuna goodness.
Then they looked over at each other again, smiled and blushed hard.. again!

“Will you two just get a room”
Both of their blushes went up a few more degrees.

“HAN!”
I leaned back further into the corner and huddled my legs up protectively.
Even while stretching out Sarah could only just managed to swing her fist at my foot.
Another win for the change making me smaller than before!
If this keeps up I'm going to have to start liking this whole situation..

..yeah, not gonna happen.
It still sucks!

“You’re both driving me crazy with all the silent lovey-dovey looks. Can’t you both just admit you like each other and get it over with?”

Sarah growled at the back of her throat and shifted in her seat to open the door.
“Give us a minute Tor”
She climbed out with her crutches, careful to avoid spilling open her pizza box.
After straightening up and taking a deep calming breath she stuck her head back in to glare at me.

“Han, out.. now”
I watched her for a moment and shook my head a little.
..I may have gone a bit too far this time.
“NOW!”

Reluctantly I popped my door open and slid out the other side of the car.
Sarah’s glare didn't get any weaker, she nodded her head off toward the shops and started hobbling along on her crutches.

I glanced back at Tor for some kind of help but he put his hand up to show he was keeping out of it.
Judging by the look on his face he was a bit annoyed at me too.
My shoulders slumped and I followed her.

This is so not fair!
Normally it’s ME that has to do the telling off when SHE mouths off.
I don’t get why them flirting was annoying me so much anyway?
My emotions are just out of whack at the moment for some reason I guess.
I’d love to blame it on hormones but I've got a lot more likely culprit.
The awakening..

Last time I went through this I had no control AT ALL.
One minute I’d be so happy I was glowing.
Literally glowing.. it’s a fire user thing, don’t ask.

The next I’d be sinking into depression because I saw a leaf fall off a tree or something equally stupid and it reminded me of ‘how fragile life is’..

It’s not THAT bad this time in comparison, most likely thanks to Inner-Hannah taking the reins on it all.. but some part of it must still be affecting me..
Maybe I'm getting the emotional run off from Inner-Hannah dealing with it all?

I’ll have to meditate and check on her when we get back ho-

========

Sarah yelped and wobbled dangerously.
I staggered backwards a little, barely stopping myself from falling on my ass from the impact.

She turned around and growled at me angrily.
“What the hell is your problem!”

My shoulders sunk a little.. she's really angry.
Now I'm thinking about it, I could feel something WAS off with me.
Its possibly been going on since I woke up in the hospital honestly.

..I've got a problem..

My vision blurred and I drew in a ragged breath.

..Something’s really wrong with me..

My eyes hurt.
Why am I even bothering? I always mess everything up!

The blob in front of me, that was Sarah a second ago, moved.
Her hand came down on my shoulder but I jerked away from her.

I couldn't hold it in any more, I burst into tears and collapsed.
Somehow Sarah managed to catch me before I hit the ground.
It must have been really awkward with her leg and everything.

..her leg must hurt..

It must really, REALLY hurt an.. and I annoyed her even though she was hurt..

My head kept running guiltily through everything I’d been doing to her since I changed, then it went even further back.

I stole her favourite bracelet when we were kids!
It was really pretty and she wouldn't let me keep it but I took it anyway, I've got it in a box with my photo’s at home.
I'm such a bad sister!

========

“HAN!”
I twitched in my haze but didn't answer.
I shouldn't-

“HAN! Han, com’ on Han. I'm sorry.”
My shoulder twitched, something was poking me.

Slowly I could feel something changing in my head, it felt like someone was tugging me out of a swimming pool of Jello.
It took almost half a minute, Sarah’s voice was getting more frantic as time went on, but eventually the feeling cleared completely and my head felt lighter.

I opened my eyes, breathing out harshly in relief.

My breath misted as if it we were standing in a freezer or something.
My arm’s felt awkward, not cold but cool and a little numb..

“Han?.. Tor, her eyes are open!”

I blinked a few times to clear my eyes, my eyelash’s felt heavy and stiff.

“Han?”

Apparently I’d been laying on the asphalt, all curled up in the foetal position.
With a big shudder I managed to push myself upright.
There was a crinkling sound and some flakes of something drifted off my shirt.

Sarah was standing about a yard away from me.
She looked really worried and she was holding a long, white tipped tree branch for some reason?

“You’re okay..”
She took in a shuddering breath and dropped the stick to hug herself tight instead.

I glanced around.
The car park was still surprisingly empty of people nearby.
Kind of lucky.
It would have been embarrassing to have a freak out with everyone watching me.

“Han, can you step clear of it?”
I glanced at her and frowned.
Clear of where?

She gestured at the floor.
My head followed her finger and I jolted back in surprise.

In a set of expanding rings around me was.. ice?
The asphalt was almost pure white at the center, under my feet, but as it expanded out it thinned into just a smattering of frost.

I tested the ground with my hand and it felt a little uneven, as if the asphalt had buckled from the cold.
My foot caught slightly on a crack that had formed under the thick frost as I gently eased myself up.

“What the hell?”
I shook my leg a little and a thin layer of frost came off of my jeans.

“Hannah! Come on, we gotta go. Quick, before someone notices”
Sarah clapped her hands to get my attention and gestured to the car, her eyes were tight with worry.

I nodded and moved out of the rings toward the car, initially in a slow walk but gaining speed as I went.
She’s right, we need to get out of here.
This kind of thing is bound to attract attention and I do NOT need the MPA on my ass on top of everything else!

========

Tor pulled us quickly out of the car park and back over the bridge to the Freeway.
He looked a bit spooked about it all.
I wasn't feeling much better.

My hand stayed tight on top of the discarded pizza boxes from Sarah and Tor’s forgotten meals.
None of us felt like talking unsurprisingly.
I don’t know what they were thinking but my mind was stuck on the ‘why?’ more then anything.

Why did I just freak out?
Why did it all spiral out of control like that?
Why..

WHY ICE?!

I'm a FIRE user.
If I was going to have a burst of magic, it would have been fire!

Hell, it shouldn't even have been fire!
I got that under control years ago.
At the very worst I should have turned the floor orange..

Why Ice, of all things?!

========

“Han?”
Sarah sounded unsure of herself.
I looked away from the window to watch her.
“Yeah?”
She looked nervous as well, a bit too nervous to be normal honestly.

“You’re not gonna flash freeze my car, are you?”

For a moment we both sat staring at each other.
Her mouth twitched a little, mine did too.

Almost in sync we both cracked up laughing.
It wasn't really funny but we needed to laugh.
It was either laugh or cry at this point and I've done enough of that today so far.

Tor didn't turn away from the wheel, he didn't look angry or anything but I think at this point he just wanted to get the whole journey over with.
It’s a long drive from Los Angeles to home.
I'm kind of glad I slept through most of it.

Come to think of it, where does Tor even live?
He’s not local, I know that much.
Sarah’s production company signed him on.
The Hub staff approved him so I never bothered to really look into it.
What if he lives on the east coast or something?
He’s driving us all this way and he might have to fly home afterwards!

My curiosity was piqued.
I leaned forward in the seat and brought my mouth closer to Tor’s ear.
“Where're ya from Tor?”
He shuddered visibly, my breath on his ear must have tickled.
I felt a little smug for getting the reaction out of him but Sarah’s warning look made me sit back a little further away from him and not try it again.

He’s cute but Sarah’s obviously building up for her big moment to ask him out.
I’d have to be a real bas- a real bitch to poach someone she’s fancied for so long.
She doesn't date enough as it is!

Well.. Tor’s not my type anyway, so there..
It’s nice to know I can still get a reaction out of him though, even with this stupid childish face.

“I'm from Las Vegas..?”
He said it as more of a question then an answer, as if he was confused about why I was asking.

I smirked a little, it was understandable confusion, he’s not privy to how my mind works.

With the awakening, I'm switching mental gears a lot at the moment anyway.
At least I've got an excuse to be spontaneous for a while, that’s a useful card to be able to play if I do something stupid.

“Wouldn't have pinned you for a Vegas kid? Bright lights, casinos and strip joints?”
I tried to catch his eye in the rear-view mirror but he wasn't co-operating.

“I was thinking more.. Kansas farm-boy?.. Oh! Or Texas cow-boy!.. Defiantly a boy scout at some point either way, right?”
I tried to give a big cheesy grin at him in the mirror.

By the time he turned his head to glance at me the grin had gone a little limp.
Grinning wide like that made my cheeks hurt..
..Stupid new face..

Tor’s eyes were smiling, obviously he found something funny.
“What’s so funny huh?”
Impulse control is apparently not something I've got a lot of at the moment.

I reached out and slapped his shoulder lightly when he didn’t answer fast enough, not hard, he’s still driving after all.

He smirked back at me in the mirror.
“Las Vegas, New Mexico”
Sarah giggled.

I huffed and slid back into my seat properly.
“..tease”

He mimed tilting an imaginary hat at me, without looking away from the road.
“Ma’am”

Sarah giggled some more.
I huffed again, louder this time, and turned away to look out the window so I didn't have to look at their smug faces.
Teasing’s only fun when you’re the one doing it..

========

Most of the journey was boring after that.
Sarah turned the radio on so we had some noise but no one seemed to be willing to talk.
Either that, or I was still radiating annoyance at Tor for getting me earlier and they didn't want to argue with me.

For a while I considered going back to sleep but I wasn't sleepy anymore.
The freak-out session in the car park and the resulting Ice magic had woken me up nicely.

I know I should really be trying to work out what the hell happened there, but it’s not like I can do research in the car!
This is why the Hub has its Mage library.
In my case, I’d have a better chance of getting answers if I drop in to see Fena and Edith.
Fena is like a walking encyclopaedia of weird magic stuff.

It’s not life threatening or anything anyway.
I just have to be careful to not let myself get worked up over things until I can sort it out.
Nice and easy..

“Ohh, Lake Shasta..”
I leaned across the back seat and stuck my face against the window.
We went over the bridge slowly, traffic was pretty thick for some reason.

Lake Shasta is huge, well it seems it anyway..
Okay.. maybe that idea is tinged with some leftover awe from my childhood.
It’s not really THAT big, especially compared to the ‘Upper’ back home, but the water looks brighter for some reason and all the rough edges to the riverbank are really interesting.
Put together it makes it look deeper and wider than it really is.
It almost looks like someone just dumped a load of water into a valley, which makes sense I guess.
It’s not really a lake, there’s a Dam somewhere around here that turned it into a reservoir in the fifty’s.

They had a display about the river once, at the end of the tour through the Shasta Caverns.
Dad took us to the Caverns a few times each summer when we were kids, the Air-con at home wasn't working well enough for his liking apparently, he never liked the heat that much.

Caverns are really cool places.. as in they are cold, not like their ‘interesting cool’..
Although I guess they were pretty ‘interesting cool’ too when we were kids.
Sarah didn't like them though.
Mum used to take her to the play area while Dad took me with him on the tour.

I opened my mouth to mention it to Sarah but stopped before voicing anything.
She was sleeping in the passenger seat, her head lolled away from me against the window.

She wouldn't have cared anyway, Sarah doesn't tend to care about stuff if Dad was involved.
I tried to talk about it to her once but she cut me off and didn't want to talk about it for some reason.

A glance at Tor told me that he wasn't up for conversation either.
He looked a bit annoyed at the cars in front of us.
We’d got past the bridge but the traffic hadn't eased at all.
It looked like there was some kind of road works or an accident being recovered ahead of us.

I sighed and settled back in my seat a bit more to stare out the window again instead.

========

We followed the I-5 for another hour or so.
The Traffic eased and Tor seemed to lose some of his tension with it.

He calmed down so much, that I even managed to get him to play a hushed game of ‘l Spy’ with me.
It didn't last long.
Once the initial ‘tree, bush, road, rock, car and hill’ options were used up it just became silly.

Even though the interstate was lined with a pretty thick run of trees I could tell when we got close to Mount Shasta.
No magic user could ignore it.
It’s huge, even for a mountain, but the pure primal energy that was just oozing off of it was much more impressive than its actual size.
The power sent vibrations out for miles that could touch you to your very core!

The Klamath tribes believed that a spirit called ‘Skell’ lived on top of the mountain and fought another spirit called ‘Llao’ by throwing hot rocks and Lava at his home on ‘Mount Mazama’.

No offence intended to the Klamath tribe but I've been to Crater Lake, the giant hole in the ground where Mount Mazama once stood and there’s no magical residue there.
I’d love to put the whole thing off as old superstition.
A god-like being that throws hot rocks and Lava from the top of a volcanic mountain?
Let’s be honest, logic dictates it’s more likely to have just been the volcanic mountain.. ya know..
Being a Volcano.
If I wasn't a mage, I’d probably just write it all off easily but just driving past the Mount Shasta puts me on edge.
It feels like something old and powerful is watching me!

The only other time I've felt that kind of oppressing power before was when I passed one of the True Fae guardians in a hall at the Hub.
Normally they stay out of sight in the halls, I don’t know why she chose to walk past me.

She’d looked a bit weak, really delicate features with an aristocratic feel about her.
She was almost pure white, her skin, her hair, her clothing, all of it as white as the halls of the Hub.
The only splash of color to her was her eyes, dark black pupil-less eyes.
Her eyes looked like tiny black-holes.
It only lasted for a moment, but when we made eye contact I felt pressure crash down upon me.
I get the same feeling from just being NEAR Mount Shasta.

My legs came up to my chest and I huddled into the corner seat furthest from the mountain while we followed the I-5 around it.
The feeling stayed with me, even after we turned off the I-5 at Weed and on to Route 97.

Eventually Tor got us out of the mountain’s ‘range of effect’ and I let out a big sigh of relief.
Being near there is defiantly not a nice feeling!

This is the first time I've had to come near it since I discovered magic.
Normally I just use a waypoint or warp myself around the country in small trips.
I’ll have to make a note to never get this close again.

I feel kind of dirty.
Can’t shake the feeling that whatever gives the mountain its power noticed me.
Don’t ask me why, it’s just my gut instinct, telling me that coming back here would be a very bad idea!

=========

Sarah woke up as we were passing out of a little one-horse town called ‘Macdoel’.
She’s never been good at sleeping in a car, she must be pretty tired for her to have even tried to honestly.

The sign we passed on the way out, assured me that we were ten miles away from ‘Dorris’ and thirty miles from ‘Klamath Falls’.
Home sweet home.

“Are we going straight back to the flat when we get into town?”
It had been bugging me for a while, we barely have enough space for me and Sarah in the flat.
Unless she’s planning to share a bed with Tor.. and let’s be honest, what are the odds of THAT with the way they keep dancing around each other?

“We have to report into the Hub for a scan and debriefing. Probably some decontamination time too”
I blinked at her for a moment in confusion.

Really?.. I never have to do any of that normally?

Sarah must have read my disbelief on my face because she shrugged.
“It’s standard procedure. The real hard work is going back to the studio and trying to pretend everything is normal.”
She frowned and rolled her shoulder uncomfortably.
“Explaining any ‘CGI creatures or effects’ that are on the footage ahead of time is annoying, we had to call in a mage to wipe the studio staff’s memories once because they got the footage before Tor could crop out the unbelievable parts.”

She really didn't look comfortable with the idea of memory wiping people.

It’s understandable, I'm not particularly comfortable with it myself.
I still do it, it’s necessary sometimes, but some low grade mages get a bit too liberal with its use.
After a while, I think they just figure that it’s easier to wipe or modify a memory instead of coming up with a believable cover story.

“But yeah.. Normally we get checked in, spend twenty minutes in decontamination, have a short debriefing to hand over any items we retrieved for inspection and then we can leave.”

I shrugged back at her but didn't argue the point.

For some reason no-one’s ever made me go through that kind of after-mission stuff..
Normally I just go home and then file a report with Felicia, the hub receptionist, in the morning.

Unless I'm injured obviously, then I tend to drop by Fena’s for some healing and sympathy first.

“If it’s standard procedure then it can’t be that bad. What’s the worst that can happen?”

========

We ended up having to park a few streets away from the Hub’s entrance.

I can’t believe I never noticed just how many car’s there are in this area?
There’s only a few empty store fronts and a motel used by Hub guests in this section of town but virtually every inch of side-walk has a car parked alongside it.
You would think the Hub could come up with a more covert way to hide the entrance.
A private car park nearby or something?

Then again, if they ever had the police try to raid them it would only take one mage to get rid of any evidence and the memory of it all.. I guess.

They would do it without blinking too!
I once saw a SWAT mage wipe a year of a woman’s memory clear, just because her boyfriend turned out to be an unregistered Parthax demon!
Parthax demons are vegetarian and, aside from some weird looking toes, they look human too!
The Hub has a few doctors on the payroll who helped her ‘get over her spontaneous amnesia’ but it still doesn't feel right to me..

That’s not even considering when they do memory modifications either.
That’s just messed up.. and awkward for everyone involved.
People who get memory modifications tend to be disorientated for a while because every time they find a situation that doesn't match up with their ‘new’ memories, it takes a few moments for their brain to come up with a ‘believable’ reasoning that fits with the modified memories.

It can lead to some weird situations.

One woman whose dog turned out to be a weird magical cross-breed, she woke up the next morning convinced she’d had to give the dog up.
She loved the dog, so giving it up didn't initially make sense to her, but within minutes she would swear blind that the dog bit her and she’d developed a deep-seated fear of dogs from it.

That’s the problem with memory modification, you can NEVER know which direction someone’s brain will go with the new information you’re dumping in there.
I don’t like using memory modification OR memory wiping.

If a civilian gets caught in the crossfire while I'm on a mission, I tend to send them to the nearest Hub for an induction.
Knowing about magic CAN be dangerous but at least if they get an induction they get to choose if they remember everything or not.
Plus the induction team tend to be a less.. loose.. with their casting.

An onsite SWAT mage will normally just take a whole day from someone rather than trying to find out when during the day they actually came into contact with anything magical.
I've been on the other end of that kind of situation, it’s not nice.

Sarah told the SWAT team who rescued us from Vlad’s place that I got involved ‘after prom’, seconds later and I had no memory of how or why I was waking up in my room.
A moment after that and I was convinced that I got blisteringly drunk the night before.
Despite the fact that I’d never drunk alcohol before that and I was suspiciously lacking a hangover!

For years after that, until Edith’s ‘Juju stick’ gave me the ACTUAL memories back at least, I avoided alcohol like the plague!
It seems irrational to me now, and I can’t help resenting the way it affected me so badly without my knowledge.

=======

“You getting out or what?”
I blinked rapidly and glanced over at Sarah.
She was standing outside the car, leaning back in with a fond smile on her face.

“I don’t know where you go sometimes, the lights are on but no-one’s home.”
I shrugged and shuffled out of the car.
It happens, I get kind of lost in thought.
As Max said ‘one thought does tend to lead to another’
It’s going to happen even more for a while, reincarnation sucks like that.

“Let me do the talking. When we’re cleared I’ll have a word with my supervisor to get everything sorted, have you sorted for a new ID and stuff.”

My eyebrow popped up, I would think that my complete change in gender and apparently age too would be more of a problem for them to handle.
It’s not exactly normal..

“Legal are surprisingly quick about these things. I got them to sort out my passport and renew my driving licence, took less than twenty minutes, beats the DMV at least.”

I grinned and couldn't hold back a snort of amusement.

“What?”
She probably would have slapped my arm just for the sake of it if she didn't need both hands to use her crutches.

“You cheated to get your licence.. explains your driving..”
I didn't wait for her response, just shot off ahead of her to avoid any kind of retribution.
It sounded like Tor found it amusing at least, even if Sarah was yelling after me angrily.
They were both left in my dust as I rounded the last corner and came to a stop near the entrance way to the Hub.

..well.. I think it’s the entrance way at least?
It’s the right place, just..
Where I used to see a tacky disused comic book shop with a terrible name, which just so happened to spell out USMPA G-O.
There was just a blank shop?

Peeling crème paint, empty glass windows which showed nothing but a lot of dust and debris inside.
The door wigged me out the most honestly, it was glowing blue!
REALLY blue, like the color I see if I keep my eyes open when I warp somewhere.

Never let it be said I'm not brave!
..also I could hear Sarah catching up to me and I REALLY don’t want to give her a chance to get back at me so easily.

With a deep breath I stepped up to the glowing blue door and cautiously prodded it with a finger.
My finger tingled for a moment and seemed to disappear the more I pushed at the door.

A glance back over my shoulder showed Sarah and Tor rounding the corner so I figured, to hell with it.
I shut my eyes instinctively and stepped through the glowing blue door.

========

The sound of a lot of feet moving and the muffled rumble of people talking was the first thing I picked up.
I peaked an eye open and sighed in relief when I saw the Hub’s reception area, looking just as it had the last time I saw it.

Feeling a bit stupid for getting so worked up by the entrance way acting weird, I straightened up and tried to look like I hadn't just been worried magic was going to do something screwy to me.
My first step told me that I really had been worried, my shoe crunched a little on a few ice crystals that fell off of it and came under foot.

I glanced down at it and frowned hard.
“Brilliant.. at least I didn't burn anything I guess.”
When I looked back up my eyes met Felicia’s stare.

She was behind her desk as usual, although the paperwork that used to litter it was missing.

I didn't know it until the higher ups called me in to help upgrade the communications system and tools behind her desk, but there really IS a reason why they pay her so much, while putting up with her attitude problems.
Somehow, they wouldn't explain it to me in anything but vague words, her being at that desk allows the Hub to draw power from the laylines around town.

I can guess it’s not a direct connection.
Probably something like her being here completes the ‘circuit’ and lets some remote place draw the power for storage or something.
If it worked as a direct connection then I’d never have been allowed in here..
As bad as it was when my Locus point nature crushed that idiot mages base into a tiny cube, imagine how bad it would be if I managed to collapse a Hub in the same way!

Hub G-0 is almost completely built within the fae realm too.
Maven the fae queen who, for lack of a better word, ‘rents’ the space to us would NOT be happy if I managed to turn her entire N’th dimensional realm into a fist sized cube!
Just the thought of it makes me shudder..

The shudder wasn't helped by the blank look of annoyance on Felicia’s face.
She obviously didn't recognise me.
I tried to not feel hurt by that, I wouldn't have recognised me either I guess..

=======

My mouth stretched into a weak smile and I made my way over to her.
Hopefully she will take this all in stride, she tends to go with the flow on most things, she did when I first turned up for a mission briefing dressed as Hannah at least.

I barely got within a foot of her desk before some kind of alarm went off on it.
Vaguely it felt familiar, probably one of the ones I installed.
The alarm itself at least, not whatever set it off.

I just did the enchanting necessary to give her a computer and newer tools on her desk, with connections to all the old output devices already in place.
The computer let all the other tools be integrated into one messy system.
They got some software guys in, from somewhere, to build a program that let her use everything despite the different kit involved.
I dunno how it works, I just enchanted the computer to run off ambient magic instead of electricity.
I'm a mage, not a computer.. tech-y type person!

The higher ups were really impressed at least, apparently not many people go into the whole ‘enchanting technology’ thing.
I don’t know why, my phone has so many useful extra features because I enchanted it.
Remote dialling and no need to charge it, just being the tip of the iceberg.

Edith gets really grumpy about my phone though.
Apparently she thinks using minor blood magic enchantments to make ‘New’fangled machines’ work with magic is appalling..
Crazy little Yoda woman..

=========

I shook my head hard to clear my train of thought again, this REALLY needs sorting out.
I'm so easily distracted it’s not healthy.
Powers be, if I go on a mission and get distracted it could literally be the death of me!

Felicia was looking at me weirdly.
If I didn't know better I’d say she was afraid of me for some reason?

Come to think of it, the alarms sound has stopped now and-
I glanced around the room a little with nervous gulp.
-there’s a lot of intimidating looking SWAT members with guns, trying to look inconspicuous, in the usual crowd of people moving about.

My head turned back to look at Felicia and she flinched a little.
Before I could voice any sort of question or protest someone clapped their hand down on my shoulder and leaned past me.

“Team Tomb Raider and assistant reporting in for debriefing and inspection”
I let out a breath I hadn't realised I’d been holding, it was Sarah, having caught up with me instead of some SWAT guy getting suddenly physical.

Felicia’s mouth gaped open a little and she shot a nervous look behind us for a moment.
Eventually she shrugged, waving us off down the left corridor out of reception.

Sarah seemed to know where she was going at least.
She led the way, hobbling along on her crutches, while Tor brought up the rear at his usual lumbering pace.

I couldn't shake the feeling of being watched.
It’s probably all in my head but I swear I saw the same, off-duty looking, SWAT members walk past us a few times as we walked the halls.
I guess it COULD just be coincidence, I had first-hand knowledge of how easy it is to end up walking in circles through these halls.

Normally I avoid them, like most mages do.
There’s a specific safe warp point set up in a back room of the motel down the street that most mages tend to use as an unofficial exit for the Hub, if they don’t want to face the hallways at least.

Sarah took a seemingly random right turn at a crossroads, then another sharp right moments later.
I followed along dutifully.

My eyebrow DID raise a little in amusement when we took a final right and ended up in dead-end corridor leading to a single, worn looking, door at the end.
Who said that three rights make a left?
Whoever it was obviously never tried to walk anywhere in the Fae realm!

Sarah stepped aside a little and waved me to the door.
“Ladies first”
She had a smug smile on her face that annoyed me for some reason.

I mimicked her movement and let a mocking look pass over my own face.
“Age before beauty”
She glared at me for that one.

Before we could come up with anything else to needle each other with Tor sighed loudly and squeezed past us to go through the door first.
“Can you both give it a rest?”
We shared a guilty look and shrugged in sync.
I put my hand up for a high five of peace and she easily slapped it in acceptance.

Tor’s right, with everything else going on, we really don’t need to be arguing at the moment.
I think we’re both just a bit edgy and upset, so we’re lashing out a bit.
I know I am a least..

We both turned to face the door and I didn't argue when Sarah hung back on her crutches this time, I just followed after Tor instead.

=========

“You've really never been in decontamination before?”

A grunt came out of me rather than really answering her.
She’s asked like five times now..

I don’t get what the big deal is.
The rules are different for mages, even more so for awakened mages.

Admittedly, I've never actually met any of the other, on staff, awakened mages since I started working for the Hub but the few low grade mage’s I've worked with before had whole teams surrounding them when they got deployed.
I just got given my briefing and had to file for travel expenses after the mission was over, when necessary.

I'm more interested in these ‘decontamination’ rooms anyway.
The glasses wearing lab tech guy who greeted Tor when we came in, seemed to be a bit.. distracted.
I trusted Sarah’s blasé attitude when he waved us toward, what looked like, three solid stone cubical rooms about the size of a small bathroom.

The moment I stepped inside the room had gone momentarily dark, then the door sealed tight and everything lit up again.

The walls MUST be enchanted.
If I run my hands over them all I can feel is cold stone but looking at them.. well..
..They kind of don’t exist?

I mean.. they EXIST but they’re see-through!

Pretty cool little bit of enchanting honestly.
I’ll have to ask someone how it works, when we get out of here.
I've been staring at this wall trying to break it down in my head but all the glyphs they used must be inscribed on the outside because I can’t find anything remotely useful inside by running my hands over the wall.

========

“Han? Give it a rest will you. We’ll be out in a minute, don’t worry.”
She offered me a reassuring smile.

I was tempted to glare at her in response.

I'm not freaking out!
I'm just curious..
It’s not often I get to see magic, this well made, that I don’t already have some kind of inherited knowledge about.

Sarah’s smile slipped a little into worry so I gave my inspection up with a sigh.
We’re going to be in here for who-knows how long.
Best to not start another argument over something petty.

“Hey Tor, you okay buddy?”
He glanced over at me from his ‘room’ and grunted.
He’s probably dead tired.
I would be, having to drive for hours on end, after having so many flights beforehand as well.

Taking a leaf out of his book, I slid myself into a corner of my ‘room’ and tried to distract myself.

Maybe if I inverted a ‘Lux’ rune and connected it to a ‘Speculo’ rune, on either side, I might be able to remake this ‘invisible walls’ enchantment they have?

It would need a LOT of control clusters though and..

DAMN IT! Where’s my notebook when I need it?
Trying to work out a new spell in my head is annoying AND confusing!

=========

We’d been in the rooms for about twenty minutes when the distracted lab tech guy came over to check on us.
He had a clipboard with him and was inspecting something in the top right corner on each of our see-through doorways.

It annoyed me a little that he didn't even bother to greet us, just went about checking whatever was written up there and making notes.

Finally he finished with Tor’s block and lowered his clip board to inspect us curiously.
His eyes settled on Sarah and he walked over to her room.

“Ms.Cooper. I'm getting some readings that are a bit.. well..”
He actually showed an emotion at last, pushing his glasses up his nose nervously.

“Come on Reggie, we’ve done this song and dance enough times. What’s the damage? An extra ten minutes before we’re clear?”
Sarah seemed to be well versed in how this stuff works, probably from personal experience.

I glanced at the lab tech guy again.

Seriously, his names Reggie?..
He doesn't look like a Reggie to me.
Defiantly not a Reginald either!

I shuddered a little.

What do I know about names anyway?
The LAST Reginald I knew turned out to be called Bob!

“uh..”
‘Reggie’ seemed a bit more flustered now.
“A bit longer than that Ma’am. You didn't happen to come into contact with some kind of.. class five or above magical object, did you?”

Sarah looked nervous now.

“Not really..”
She didn't sound sure of that though.

‘Reggie’ sighed and pushed his glasses up to rub his nose a little.
“I'm getting the most residual feedback from your..”
He shot a momentarily confused look at me but seemed to come to some kind of decision eventually.
“..assistant.”

I frowned at him.
I'm getting a bit annoyed with that term.
Assistant, my ass!
How about ‘Savior’ or ‘Long suffering sibling’ instead?

“Mr.Nobbs has the least residue, so little it’s as if he hasn't even been in contact with the object at all?”
‘Reggie’ seemed really confused by that.
I was more interested in the other bit of information he’d said.

Nobbs.. Tor Nobbs..
No wonder the poor guy just goes by ‘Tor’.

For some reason it feels like the name ‘Nobbs’ should mean something to me but I'm drawing a blank on that one.
Probably some Arista incarnation from fifteen-hundred B.C that had a pet cat called Nobbs or something equally inane.
It happens all the time..

Sarah chewed her lip nervously and shot me a worried look.
I shrugged back at her, they are going to find out eventually, what’s the worst that can happen.

“On our last expedition a mage tried to trap us with something called-”
She cut herself off and looked momentarily confused.

I decided to pick up for her, it’s not THAT hard a name to remember.
“The bindings of bad faith”

‘Reggie’ jerked as if someone had electrocuted him.
His head twitched from me to Sarah and back a few times in worry.
“Seriously?”
I shrugged, Sarah nodded.
Tor didn't answer.. well.. unless you consider a rumbling snore as an answer at least?

“This isn't good. Not good at all..”
My lips twitched into a smirk.
“Tell me about it, Max is an utter bastard at times”

‘Reggie’ twitched and shot a nervous look up at the top right-hand corner of my doorway again.
Slowly he brought his eyes down to me, it looked like he was sweating all of a sudden.
I wish I knew what that corner bit said..
Judging by his face, it’s not anything good.

“..Max?”
His voice came out as an almost horse whisper.

I cocked my head to the side and considered him for a moment.
Maybe he’s heard of him.
Awakened mages of Max’s level aren't exactly common.

“Maxarimus.. well, John.. I call him John normally. It really gets his goat, stupid big headed ass-hole”

It felt good to cuss him out AND spread the use of his name at the same time.
Maybe one day I can get us to a point where EVERYONE calls him John.
Just imagine the look on his face!

‘Reggie’s glasses started fogging up, he was sweating so much
He must have heard of Max for sure, I wonder what Max did to him?

Without any form of warning ‘Reggie’ lunged away from us and slapped his palm down hard on a big red button on his desk.
I’d not noticed it before, it looks like it was partly buried under a load of paperwork.
Almost as if it was rarely, if ever, used.

Red lights started flashing around us and a loud whooping warning siren went off, giving me a headache instantly.
In seconds a group of armed SWAT guys came pouring in the door as if they had been just waiting to be called.
I got a glimpse of their nervous, wide eyed stares before everything jolted.

After a moment pause there was another big jolt and I was thrown to the ground as the entire room I was in went shooting backwards somehow.
The invisible walls went back to plain stone and I was plunged into darkness.

I was only just gathering my whit’s from what was happening when it all stopped with another jolt.
A yelp of surprise escaped my mouth but, for the amount of speed and force that seemed to be involved, I didn't actually feel very hurt by sliding across the floor into the back wall so sharply.

I hope Sarah’s okay?
She’s got her leg, and she was the only one standing up when this all happened too..

Slowly I eased my hand along the floor and eventually found a side wall to follow up so I could get into a standing position.

“Hello?”
I felt a bit stupid knocking on the stone wall but there weren't many other options.
What else am I going to do when it’s so dark I can’t even see my-
.. Duh!.. Am I a mage or not?!

With less than a push at my core a blue flame ignited in my palm.
It’s the same type of fire I used to light up the temple entrance in the jungle.
The flame came out a little more violet then my normal sky blue but a flame’s a flame.
It’s a really basic spell.
The ‘Safety flame’ was the first thing Fena ever showed me how to make.
It can’t burn anything and feeds off of ambient magic to pour out light.
Not sure HOW I managed to mess it up enough to change the color so much but it’s not THAT important.

What IS important is that I'm now locked in a stone box, who-knows-where for who-knows-what reason!
I felt little chill of fear go up my spine..

My nose scrunched up and I tried to forcefully warp out of the box to the nearest waypoint.
..Then I tried desperately for the nearest back-alley I could remember.
..Nothing.

"I can't warp out.."
My stomach sunk like a stone.

I'm trapped.
I can't get out..
My breath started coming in short, sharp pants.

The air feels warm, kinda stuffy..
Logically there must be some kind of airflow in here, probably magical, but my chest feels tight.
I can’t breathe properly..

Are the walls getting closer?
It feels like the walls are getting closer..

I sunk to my knees in the corner and tried to get a clear breath in.
Even though I had a light source now, maybe I would be better off without it?
I squeezed my eyes tightly shut and just focused on breathing.

“HELP!”
No-one answered.
I went back to breathing.

Just breath.
It’s okay, just breath..
Without conscious effort my arms came up to hug my knees and I started slowly rocking in the corner.
“LET ME OUT OF HERE!”

No-one answered..

A dark, little stone box is not the greatest of places to start a new life from. Events unfold including but not limited to: Sarah has warm hands (in comparison at least) And Hannah ruins a perfectly good outfit.

Breath, breath, breath..

I can’t focus enough while caged up like this to actually meditate, but by zoning out and just focusing on my breathing I can hold the panic back for a while..

Breath, breath, breath-
My mantra broke when I felt the jolt again

Finally I'm getting out of here..

G-force pushing me into my corner a bit tighter, but it still seemed slightly cushioned.
They probably have some kind of enchantment in place to protect the prisoners during movement.
I could design something to do that pretty easily.. but not right now.

I need to get out of here.
I can’t focus properly like this..

=======

The second jolt made me lean forward a little but didn't leave me sprawling like it did the first time this happened, mostly because I was prepared for it.

I let out a deep breath of relief when the dark stone walls around me became translucent again.
The light hurt my eyes a little but anything is better than being stuck in this tiny box with nothing but stone to stare at.

While I was busy trying not to freak out, the stone cell has been busy moving rooms apparently?

The room outside looks very.. pompous.
A huge difference from the cluttered mess of the lab techs office earlier.

The first thing that comes to mind is that this room’s owner is probably some sort of stuck up politician.
Two of the walls are covered in floor to ceiling bookcases, judging by their neat color coded order, the owner is either obsessive compulsive or has never actually used the books for anything but display.
A thick, dark wooden desk took up most of the floor space in the room with a high backed chair behind it.. another classic, pompous ‘power-play’ move.

A shift in the room’s lighting drew my attention to the thing I’d been trying to avoid.
Standing in front of a large bay window behind the desk, with his back to me, was the silhouette of a man.
The window is most likely a fake enchanted one, you don’t get real windows in the Hub.
Yet again, another detail designed to intimidate and show power..
It’s like this guy has been following some kind of ‘power-play’s for dummies’ book.

He turned slowly from the window to face me.
As he stepped forward he came out if the windows glare and into focus.

His suit screamed ‘I'm in charge’.
Sadly it was undermined a little by the fact that his haircut screamed ‘man who is so old he still believes slicked back, greased hair is fashionable’.
Neither his suit nor his hair suited his surprisingly young looking face though.

“Arista..”
His tone was smooth and silky.
It put me on edge instantly.
I've never met someone who talks like that and wasn't some level of messed up in the head!

“You’re shorter then I was expecting”
I let out an indignant noise and staggered to my feet in defiance.
Judging by his smirk, he was expecting that reaction.

He walked toward my stone cell with the swagger of someone who KNOWS they are holding all the cards.
I’d like to say he wasn't but.. I'M the one trapped in an inescapable box with a bad case of claustrophobia clouding up my thoughts, while he stands outside smirking at me..
Kind of hard for him NOT to be holding all the cards at this point really.

“Who are you?”
It was the first question that came to mind at the moment.
He smiled in pleasure and waved his hand in the air with a dramatic flourish.

“My name.. is not important”
His smirk took on a teasing tone, which showed in his voice as well.

Like a gleeful child he moved up to the front of my cell.
If there wasn't a slab of thick invisible stone between us, I'm sure he would be invading my personal space by now.

“My, my.. your lithographs really don’t do you’re beauty justice”

I shuddered and took a step back from him.
His eyes were wide with wonder and just a hint of madness.

I know those eyes..
I've seen those eyes before..
Max had those eyes when he demanded to know my true feelings for him.
..Obsession.. madness..

“What the hell is a lith-o-graph? I'm sure I've never had one before, whatever it is.”
For a moment his happy smirk slipped and his whole face darkened along with it.

“Let us not play games Arista.. at least.. not yet.”
The darkness eased from his face again but didn't truly leave his eyes.
The hairs on the back of my neck stood up as his eyes slid over my body and slowly made their way back up to my face.

“So much power, in such a little vessel..”
He cupped his hands under his chin and offered me a smile that, I believe, he thought would be charming in some way.
I shuddered hard in response and took another step back toward the center of the cell.
Tight and horrible as it was, I felt slightly glad that there was a solid stone wall between us right now.

“The Fae have been talking about you, you know.. all little whisperings.”
He fluttered his hand as if trying to show me visually what a ‘little whispering’ was.

“The old one, they say. The true partner to Pathos, they call you..”
He leaned forward and pressed his nose up against the see-through stone wall between us like a child at an aquarium.

“..and, my personal favourite.. Death.. They scream it in ecstasy! The death of millions, destroyer of worlds, Queen of the damned..”
His mouth pouted slightly and he seemed to relish the next few words.
“..Arista.. de La Morte”

My head was shaking frantically from side to side in denial before I even realised I was doing it.
That’s not me!
That’s not even Arista!
I have her memories but that’s not me. That’s not HER!
Nothing even hints at something so.. so..

“You've got the wrong girl..”
He perked up again and grinned at me happily.

“Oh, I do so love it when a girl plays hard to get”
With surprising grace he pushed himself away from the stone wall between us and reached for something on his desk.

He leaned back toward me, in his hands he now held some large vanilla folders full of paper.
Carefully, almost lovingly he pulled the first one from the pile and flicked through it until he found what he was looking for.
The rest of the folder dropped from his hand but he didn't seem to notice, now focused solely on the small picture in his other hand.

With surprisingly speed he twisted the picture in his nimble fingers and slammed it against the stone wall.
His grin became slightly manic as he watched me trying to work out what it was meant to mean.

“Kherty, the slaughterer. This is the earliest known depiction of.. him”
I tried not to let my confusion and annoyance show through.
The last thing I need to do is set him off somehow.

“The Egyptians worshiped him as a death deity. What many don’t realise is that, before Egypt’s second dynasty, SHE was worshiped as a deity.”
I frowned at him, not finding this story in any way as amusing as he appeared to.

The picture was of a rough carved sandstone drawing.
Most of the details were useless, I could just make out a generally feminine form and what appeared to be a set of goat horns on the figures head.

“A cult formed up around her actions, as cults tend to do”
He slid the picture off of the wall and stared at it thoughtfully.
“The narrow-minded priests of ‘Leotopolis’ found it more fitting to swear themselves to a male deity, it’s a common problem among their ilk, so they changed her references to suit their needs”

He was losing me quickly, it felt like this tangent he’d drifted into was completely pointless..

“She was deeply connected to Osiris, they were said to share the task of ruling the underworld together.”
His eyes drifted from the photograph, back to me with a considering look on his face.
“We know from confirmed sources that you’re dear.. friend.. Maxarimus was, or at least portrayed himself as, Osiris..”

A cold chill went down my spine.
Oh.. That’s why he’s telling me this.

“You think that.. that Arista was this ‘Kherty’? That she pretended to be a god with her magic, just like Max did?”

He grinned at me with childish glee and dropped the photograph carelessly to the floor.

“I don’t THINK anything, I KNOW you were Kherty. The data all makes sense if you look deeply enough.”
He shifted forward and peered about as if searching for spy’s listening in.

“It’s okay, you can tell me Arista. I'm right aren't I? So many incarnations, and a pattern to all of them.”
His eyes lit up with unholy glee for a moment.
“Death, Goddesses and Maxarimus. Wherever all three are present.. there you are.”

My mouth dropped open in shock.
He’s insane!
I'm not.. I mean Arista’s not.. She’s innocent!

I've got her memories, I KNOW she’s innocent.
There’s not even a hint of some kind of.. of god complex or death fetish in her memories!
Arista may have had some incarnations that were a bit high strung or in positions of power but nothing like this!

“You don’t believe me”
He sounded really disappointed for a moment but flipped back to an excited grin moments later.
“I’ll just have to try harder to convince you”

He grasped the next folder and flicked through it at speed.
With a painful sounding slap he placed another photograph against the wall for me to see.

It was of another engraving.
This one, a lot less rough to the eye, seemingly moulded in clay rather than sandstone.
It showed a woman, being jabbed with spears and held over an open flame by a group of mostly naked men.
Not a very pleasant image..

“Gullveig”
He smiled at me hopefully.
“She is believed to be the same person as the Goddess Freyja, but in human form.”
When I didn't react he frowned and continued anyway.
“They called her ‘she that remembers, the first on earth’. She was stabbed within Odin’s temple and burned as sacrifice.. and then she returned.”
He smirked and wiggled the image a little against the wall.

“They burned her to death three times, and three times she returned to smite them. She was said to be a practitioner of magic.. It was said that she could see and know more than any other of her time, and to the evil, she brought great joys.”
He pulled the picture way and turned it around casually.

“Freyja, her goddess namesake, was the goddess of sex, gold, war.. and death..”
He smirked at me and fanned the picture teasingly.
“She had a husband as well, a fellow god by the name of Odr, not much is mentioned of him in myth.. but some clues can come from his name.”
He leaned toward me excitedly.
“Do you, by chance, know what the name ‘Odr’ translates to?”

I shook my head and held my breath slightly.
His eyes lit up with glee.

“Of the many possible iterations ‘Odr’ could mean, a few stand out.. tell me if they remind you of anyone in particular?..”
He twitched his hand a little and stared meaningfully into my eyes.
“The Divine madness.. the frantic, vehement and eager-”

“ENOUGH!”
I shivered and brought my arms up to hug around my waist.

I knew those words.
In past lives, some people have described Max with EXACTLY those words.
His chasing of m.. His chasing of Arista.. it came across to many people as simply that, a man driven mad by his eager lust for the woman he loved.
No-one ever looked twice at his motives or actions, he was considered a love-struck fool in a lot of incarnations.
It suited him to be overlooked while he chased me.. chased Arista!

This is bad, this guy has my head all mixed up.
I'm not Arista!

She’s in here, I can access her memories but my trick with the ‘Inner-Hannah’ is keeping her at bay.
I'm NOT Arista!

“You are starting to see my side of things, one more perhaps?”
My head shook ‘no’ but he ignored it and flicked open the next folder instead.

As much as I willed him not to, he found the next picture quickly and slid it onto the wall like the others.
It was a picture of a marble statue.
Well.. the head of one at least.
The woman depicted looked a bit moody, her hair was held back by something which made it look like she had two little puff balls of hair on top of her head.
They reminded me of little panda ears, even on a carved statue.

“Dea Tacita”
My eyes cut up to him and he smiled at me warmly.
“The Roman ‘silent goddess of the dead’. She went under other names as well.. Muta, Larunda and Lara.”
He pulled the picture away and stared at it lovingly.
His hand came up to stroke the images face, then he looked up to me and smiled.
“Under the guise of Lara, she was punished by Jove for having a loose tongue.. by having her tongue removed.”
I winced, he seemed to find the movement of my face enthralling for some reason.

“Jove ordered the god Mercurius to escort her deep into the underworld.”
He leaned in again, as if he was going to share some great secret with me.
“During the journey, Mercurius fell in love with Lara and forced himself upon her.. As a result she became mother to twin minor gods, the Lares, guardian deities to the Romans.”

He smirked at me, it wasn't a pleasant smirk.
“There are confirmed reports that Mercurius, Mercury in modern English, was Maxarimus..”
I hissed in a breath and glared at him, daring him to finish that sentence.
He seemed to enjoy my reaction.
“The rest is purely speculation of course..”

A growl came from the back of my throat.

“It’s not me!”
He frowned slightly.
“Arista never did any of that, and beside that I'M NOT ARISTA!”
My arms hugged tighter around my stomach.
“M.. my name is Hannah..”

He drew back, looking slightly offended.

“I thought we were past this Arista..”
His eyes stayed fixed on me as if he was trying to work out some kind of puzzle.
“Very well. Quickfire round..”

He hopped up to sit on his desk and pulled the next folder toward himself, waved it at me slightly, then tossed it over his shoulder carelessly.

“Nyx, lady of the night. Greek, said to have stood at the beginning of creation and with help from her husband Erebus she birthed the twin primordial deities, Aether and Hemera, Brightness and Day.”
He smiled slightly.
“Later, with the loss of Erebus, she either figuratively or literally brought forth a brood of personifications to subjects including; Death, Destruction, Doom, Blame, Pain, Distress, Retribution, Deceit and.. more Death”

My mouth dropped open a little.
It fit with the pattern he’s been trying to establish but that doesn't remove the fact that it’s NOT ME!

I stamped my foot and glared at him.
My foot came down with a crunch, probably from ice forming on my boots.

He pulled up the next folder without breaking eye contact.
“Manea, mother of ghosts. Etruscan Goddess of insanity and madness.”
‘Slap’ went the folder as it impacted the floor.

Slowly, he picked the remaining folders up, and one by one, tossed them onto the floor as he chanted off their contents.
“Lamia, Styx, The Keres, Crete, Marzanna, Pajauta, The Czernobog, Patulas, Oźwiena, Num..”

He looked so smug.

I shuddered hard.
Those aren't me!
I don’t remember any of these!
I didn't recognise even half of those names as WORDS let alone past-incarnations!

He let the last few folders slide out of his hands carelessly.
Slowly he settled his hands back into his lap and smiled at me brightly.

“Asking me to use anything other than your true name would be a waste Arista. You and I both know that any one of these could be as good a fit for you as this new.. Hannah..”
His tone became patronising when he said my name.
As if my name was somehow worth less than all the others he’d listed!

“My NAME is Hannah”
I put a bit of extra effort into that sentence but he didn't seem impressed.

“Call yourself as you will. I’ll not play your games about it, I learn from the mistakes of the others that have come before me. YOU are Arista de la Morte.. I will address you as such”
He slid off the desk and moved closer to my stone cell.

It felt like he was weighing my worth and judging me with his suddenly cold eyes.

“The important question is not what to call you, it’s much simpler than that.”
He took the last few steps forward and placed his hand on the transparent stone between us.
“Why are you here Arista?”

I huffed and stamped my foot again, ignoring the crackle of breaking ice I got for my efforts.

“I Live HERE!”
I stamped my foot again and continued to stamp with each following point I had to make, it made me feel better for some reason.
“This is MY town! I have family here, I work for the Hub! I AM NOT ARISTA!”
My breath was coming out in frustrated gasps which misted instantly.
“My NAME is Hannah Cooper! I've had ENOUGH of your stories, let me out of this DAMNED BOX!”

With a grunt I swung back my arm and lashed out at the stone wall between us with a solid punch.
Magic was pooling all over my body, I could feel it, colder than usual but still of use.
When my fist made contact with the wall a pressure wave of energy blasted out of it, protecting my hand from damage and multiplying the force of my strike.

A lot of dust came up, it set me off into a coughing spree.
After a few moments, some part of the box’s enchantments must have kicked in because the air cleared sluggishly.
I may have actually damaged the thing?

Right in front of my face, seemingly floating in the middle of the air between us, was a long crack that went from the floor all the way up to the boxes ceiling.

The crazy storyteller’s eyes were wide in shock.
I slowly looked back down from inspecting the crack and smirked at him darkly.
Not so inescapable after all..
One more hit, maybe two?

My fist came back for another punch and the storyteller flew into action.
His hands skittered across the surface of the stone wall between us, obviously he could see something I couldn't, probably the same thing the lab tech guy kept looking at earlier.
I paid it no mind, just focused on gearing up for my next strike.
I will NOT stay in this damned box a moment longer!

As my fist swung forward to strike the wall again the world slowed down.
I couldn't move my head, it felt like my body was trying to swim in treacle.

The storyteller let out a sigh of relief and turned back to me with wide, interested eyes.
“That’s not a skill we have on file.. Very interesting.”

I opened my mouth to cuss him out but my tongue felt like it weighed a ton.
Now my jaw was open it took so much effort to even move it, let alone speak.

“Time dilation field, it’s part of the system we use to block warping from inside containment, I just ramped it up a bit..”
I could hear him fine but my body wouldn't react to my thoughts.
Normally time dilation like this causes words to be muffled and distorted.
The box must have some kind of telepathy based ‘intercom’ system built into its runes to send sound from outside directly into my brain, bypassing my ears.
“The box slows all biological matter inside it like this, luckily, as a mage you can still listen and think just fine..”
DAMN IT!
I WAS SO CLOSE!

“Speaking of the systems we use to contain newly awakened mages..”
He tapped out something on the wall again and something behind me made metallic sounding series of clicking noises.

Just above my lower back, resting on my spine itself, there was a burning sensation.
For a moment I thought it was my ‘no lying’ brand acting up but it was slightly higher up then that should be.

I wanted to scream.
I wanted to thrash around in pain.
I wanted to stop it!.. but I couldn't.
I couldn't move, the time dilation was forcing every mental twitch of my body to take so long just to go down my nerves let alone actually DO something.

The burn increased, my spine flared in so much pain I wished I could black out but I couldn't.
It felt like a torturous lifetime before my body collapsed to the floor.

Whatever was burning me didn't stop, if anything it got worse, but at least my body could move again and it wasn't so mind numbingly slow now.

“Sorry about that, receiving a brand while under time dilation.. how unpleasant.”
He sounded mildly amused.
“You’re lucky I caught it so quickly. Imagine if I’d left you to it until the brand finished?”

I didn't respond to him, I just curled up into a ball on the floor and tried not to twitch too much while the brand did its work.

“I have more questions of course, I doubt that you will be in any state to answer them now though”
He made some kind of gesture at the box’s wall and the burning at my spine increased.

I let out a scream of pain but it didn't seem to affect him.

“I'm not sure why you've come here, I don’t understand your logic behind trying to integrate with the Cooper family of all people.”

My lips twitched slightly.
It took a lot of effort to push past the pain but I needed to get this out now, while I have the chance.

“Screw.. you..”

He made a disgruntled noise but didn't react otherwise.

“The sister is unimportant. Low level eye-candy for the PR departments little TV show project.”
I could hear his feet move as if he was pacing.

“The mother is one of Christian’s many descendants, her mother is a relatively powerful first-generation mage but she has personally shown no talent in any way”
The burn of the brand slowly started to cool, I twitched a few times but tried to focus on his words instead.
I've never heard of mum being even slightly related to some ‘Christian’ guy?

“The father.. we don’t have much on him. Absent at best, derelict at worst.”
I growled at him as much as I could manage.
He shouldn't be talking about my family like this!

“So that just leaves.. the son..”
He stopped pacing and loomed over me.
The brand was apparently finished doing whatever it was doing, the burn was already cooling and I could hear the chain retracting back into wherever it came from.
“Curious case that one. An awakened mage by power levels, but no true awakening. We've been able to make use of him as a free contractor for a few years now”

Free contractor!?
Like HELL I was!
I worked for the Hub as an awakened mage!

“Last report we received, he was in South America on an assassination job.”

It wasn't an assassination!
I had to take out a damn Toraxis demon that had a whole village under his thrall!

“He completed the job and then dropped off the map suddenly, a few days later and his monitor crystal dimmed.”

I got a call from the hospital about Sarah, of course I left quickly!

“You wouldn't happen to know what happened to him, would you?”
I grunted and tried to push myself up so I could see him better.
My legs weren't working properly, the brand must have done something to my spine, hopefully it’s only temporary.

“That sounds like a yes..”
I gave up on standing and just swivelled my head so I could glare up at him instead.
“Did you have to kill him Arista?.. I know it’s your thing but the boy was a useful asset.”

My glare went up a notch.
Why would he instantly jump to THAT.
I didn't kill myself!
I mean.. yeah.. I died.. kinda.. but it wasn't on purpose or MY fault!

The storyteller sighed and rested a palm on the box for support, as if he was tired of standing.
“I think that’s enough for now. I'm sure we will get to the bottom of it all during your therapy sessions, with that brand in place it’s not like you can avoid them.”
I grunted again and made the effort to bring myself up to a kneeling position so I could look at him properly.
He looked a bit regretful for some reason but I was beyond the point of caring.

“What did you do? What’s the brand for?”
He rolled his shoulder and seemed to lose interest in me slightly.

“A basic security precaution. We give it to every awakened mage these days, we’d be stupid not to”
His eyes caught mine and he seemed to get lost looking at my face for a moment.
“If you try to use too much magic at once it will burn, if you are given an appointment at the Hub and do not turn up, we will burn you remotely.”
I flinched away from him hard.
I feel sick..

Another brand.
On top of the other one.

The Hub’s do this to all awakened mages?!
That’s not public knowledge.
Who the hell would want to become an awakened mage with that hanging over you?
Even if you ignore all the possible negatives that can come from the awakening on its own!

“I'm not heartless”
My eyebrow popped up at him instinctively but he didn't seem to be affected by it.
“We will help you settle in with your new.. family..”
What does he mean-
“You’ll love the group sessions and retraining too. Most of the awakened mages we have to hand see them as the highlight of their day..”
He looked amused for some reason.

“I think we are done here Arista. I’ll be in touch eventually. Try to stay out of trouble.. someone like you.. I will be watching”
It felt weird to see his face suddenly so serious.
Weird and scary.

“Bye Arista, have fun”
He started tapping something on the wall.
I growled low in my throat and surged to my feet.

“MY. NAME. IS. HANNAH!”
He didn't react.

He just carried on tapping away on the wall.
A moment later he finished whatever he was doing.

For just a second he made eye contact with me once more and smirked.
“Arista de la morte..”
His voice sounded wistful but his smirk said something completely different.

“Get it through your thick-head my na-“
The stone box jolted, cutting me off.

“..no..”
He seemed a bit amused by my reaction.

“NO! Don’t put me back in th-“
Before I could finish the wall changed back into plain stone and the box went pitch black.
The room around me jolted once more and sent me flying head-first into the wall.

“DAMN IT! DON’T LEAVE ME IN HERE!”
I could feel it already.
I'm trapped again.
I’d forgotten with the light and the room and HIM..

“Damn it..”
I squeezed my eyes tightly shut and slid down to the floor.
My hand moved to my back and cupped around my new, still sore, brand.

Slowly, the air around me chilled and I could feel ice particles forming up on my palm, soothing the branded area.
The room kept cooling but I didn't care at this point.
I'm trapped in here again..

From above me snow started falling.

I couldn't feel the cold..
It was a sensation, but I didn't feel ‘cold’ in itself.. not like I normally would.

“Don’t leave me in here.. don’t.. I can’t..”
A tear came out of my eye and froze solid before it could leave my cheek.

“Please..”

======

“Holy sh-”
The man’s voice I vaguely recognise seemed surprised.
“Why is the time dilation so high?”

I didn't look up.
It’s just my head playing tricks on me again.
Don’t think, don’t feel, just breathe..

“Out of the way, idiot”
There was a scuffling sound and then a few loud thumps of flesh meeting stone.
“Hannah! Hannah, damn it answer me!”

“Sarah..”
Even as a hallucination, it’s nice to hear her voice.

“What are you staring at idiot! Open the door NOW!”

I sighed out a cloud of mist.
Her voice is really loud.

“Ms.Cooper I can’t just-”
There was a meaty slapping sound and the voices turned silent.
My head perked up a little.
Why would I be imagining the lab tech guy’s voice?
Although, the thought of him being slapped IS amusing.
..bastard..

“Open. The. Damn. Door!”
Sarah sounded pissed off.
They’d better do what she says quickly or she’s likely to start biting people on general principle.

There was some more noise and then with a loud ‘Thump’ the wall in front of me disappeared.

A sheet of thick ice came crashing down to the floor without the wall there to hold it in place but I didn't care.
I could see light, real light.
The cold air around me rushed out of the room and for the first time in so long I could feel a gust of warm air rolling around me.

My skin felt so sensitive to the warmth.

“Han? Han, your scaring me here..”
Someone moved in front of the light and I groaned a little.
I want the light.
Don’t take it away again..

“Oh Jesus..”
Sarah sounded worried.
“Somebody help me! Her.. is this.. ice?”

There was a lot of clattering sounds, moving feet from the sound of it, and slowly my cold little prison felt warmer then I can remember it being in so long.
Human bodies throw out so much heat!

“Bash it open, we need to get her legs free”
The speaker was a gruff male.
He got several equally gruff mutters of agreement in response.

After a long pause and some shuffling there was a loud ‘thump’.

“It’s solid, we didn't even make a dent in it..”

Someone bent down in front of me and blocked out even more of my light.
I groaned but they didn't move.

“Han..”
A warm hand stroked my cheek.
I tried to lean into the warmth but it moved away quickly with a hiss.
“Jesus Han, you’re freezing..”

Sarah.. Sarah’s voice, Sarah’s hand..

“Han.. we want to get you out of here but we can’t. Can you do anything?”
I groaned and shook my head slowly.

I don’t feel too good..

“Melt the ice or something? Anything Han.. we need to get you warm fast and we can’t do that in here..”
My head lolled to the side and I sighed deeply.

Warm, fast.. that would be nice..

She wants me to..
.. what can I..
I could..
..yeah..
That’ll work.

I squeezed my eyes shut tight and focused on the spell.
Its basic magic, all I ever seem to do is basic magic..
Usually it’s used to dry wet clothes.. but if I overpower it a little..

Someone gasped and the feet shuffled about a lot.

“Get back”
The feet all moved out of the room quickly but Sarah stayed with me.
Her hand was so warm..

I could feel my legs getting wet.
My jeans soaking up so much water from the ice that they couldn't dry off fast enough.

“This is going to ruin my jeans..”
Sarah let out a choked laugh which may have been a sob.

“I’ll buy you new ones, just get out of here okay.. Deal?”
My lips twitched into a smile and I wiggled my toes in my still frozen boots.

“Need new boots too..”
Sarah laugh-sobbed again and stroked my hair carefully.

“I’ll get you a whole wardrobe. Just hurry up, my feet are getting cold”
I lifted my head and smiled at her shakily.
My brain felt a little slow as if I’d just woken up but I could see that she was trying to be funny.

Behind me there was a loud ‘crack’ and seconds later a lot of crumbling noises.

Sarah stepped away from me awkwardly, it took me a moment to remember about her leg cast.
Some of the gruff men from before picked me up by my shoulders and with a heave I was being dragged limply out of the room.

Finally out..
Finally..

I managed a weak smile before my eyes closed and I passed out.

=======

‘Beep’

I groaned.

‘Beep’

I groaned louder but it didn't help.
Instinctively my hand shot out at the annoying sound and with a sparking crash it stopped.

Much better..

=======

“Whoa..”

I groaned and tried to swat at the annoyance.
The sound got worse for a moment, there was a lot of yelling and frantic footsteps but soon it was back to silence.
I snuggled deeper into the warmth and smiled sleepily.

======

“Han?”
Sarah sounded a bit lost.

My head felt heavy but I shuffled it out of my cocoon of blankets to look in her direction.
She was standing at the door, some kind of riot shield between her and me.

“Sare.. why are you over there?”
She peaked over the shield a little and gave me a tight smile.

“You kinda.. almost killed someone.. they wouldn't let me close without the shield”

WHAT!

I jolted up in bed and got tangled in the blankets.
A strangled yelp came out of my mouth as I slid off the bed in a jumbled mess.

Sarah snorted a laugh but didn't move to help me.

I growled in the back of my throat and gripped the sheets to pull them off.
Seconds later I let go of them with another yelp of surprise.
They’d frozen solid!
She was peeking out from behind the shield, with a weird look on her face.

“What are you laughing at?”
My free arm swung around to point at her in annoyance.
Sarah wasn't laughing anymore.
She dived behind the shield again.

Good thing she did too.
The moment my arm stopped moving a large spike of Ice formed up at my finger tip and flew off at her.
It missed, hitting the door frame to the right of her head but it was close enough to freak me out.

“What the-”
I moved my arm back and stared intensely at my hand.

My magic was bubbling under the surface of my skin.
It felt really cold but under so much pressure, like a fizzy drink bottle someone shook really hard!

I tried to focus my eyes into mage sight.
It’s not one of my better skills.
Normally I prefer to push magic into an object and read the light show it gives off.
It’s easier, works well with my sympathetic magic and hurts my eyes less.

The lines to my eyes finally built up enough magic to access mage sight.
My hand lit up with a deep sky blue color.

I gasped and leaned away from it in surprise.
My aura is wrong!

I'm a fire user.
It should be red!
..well.. more of an orangey red, with some yellow mixing in..

Definitely not pure BLUE though!
..Yeah, I know I've been having this weird problem with ice lately, but I'm still a fire user!

You can’t just.. just wake up and change your elemental affinity!
It’s.. it’s a part of you.
It’s like..
I dunno.

It’s hard to explain.
You have to FEEL it to understand.

The simplest analogy I can think of is with the religious concept of the ‘Soul’.
You are your soul, it makes up everything non-physical about you, your personality, your memories, your thoughts, feelings and opinions.

As a mage your magical core would be the very CENTER of that soul.
It’s the part of you that the rest of you is built around.
Every facet of your.. you-ness?.. is directly connected to your core.
It’s why the awakenings are called AWAKENINGS and not just reincarnation.

Your magical core holds all your past-life memories and experiences together when it passes on.
Its energy.
Energy, even magical energy, can’t be destroyed.
It can be shifted, dissipated into a wider area or have no visible effects but never destroyed.
When someone is born as a mage, they are basically getting a reused ‘soul’.
A magical core that some mage or mages before them had.
Awakenings are just the moments where our core’s finally settle into us properly, the disconnect between our current ‘soul’ around the core fades and the current version of us merges with all the past versions that were dragged along by our reused core.

No-ones sure if there even ARE any truly ‘new’ mages being born.

That’s why the MPA were set up in the first place.
While they have divisions that work as a police force, research teams, Special Forces strike teams and any number of other jobs that you’d normally expect to find in a larger independent country’s government system rather than a relatively small grouping of people hidden within one of the world’s biggest first-world nations, they are the MPA.

The Magical PROLIFERATION Agency.
Their whole ethos is based around finding ways to bringing more magic into the world.
The other jobs, the policing, the research and the special forces.. that’s all there to protect current mages from the public, not the public from current mages.

No-one really knows how the world would react if they found out about magic’s existence all at once.. but judging from similar situations in human history..
People tend to attack what they don’t understand.

A person can be rational, a person can see both sides of an argument and can be talked out of doing something rash or dangerous.
People.. in my experience.. People are stupid.
Get enough individual, rational, ‘persons’ into a group and they become the writhing mass of stupidity and rash, violent, fear mongers known as ‘people’.

It’s not anti-social to say that I don’t like people.
I like a person.
I like a lot of person’s in fact, but there’s a reason I don’t go out to clubs or try to hang out with the off-duty staff of the Hub like Sarah does.

Hell, I don’t even try to hang out with other mages!
I've never seen another awakened mage, outside of Max.
Normal mages, the lower grade ones who fear their awakenings..
They’re people.. They are PEOPLE.
Maybe a better word for them would be ‘sheep’?
They just herd together and gossip or follow the loudest voice.

I walked into the cafeteria of the Hub once and found all the off duty mages playing dodge-ball with fire.
Right in the cafeteria!
No-one had the guts to tell them not to and none of the mages were willing to tell the few voices who came up with the stupid idea that it was so whole-heartedly STUPID!

If you’re curious, I didn't stop them directly.
I sat at a table nearby and every time they tried to launch their ‘ball’ I put the flame out.
It was amusing for a good hour watching them trying more and more ‘complicated’ spells to get their fire balls working again.
One of them even theorised that their game had pissed off some voodoo god or something.
That’s when they all started getting nervous and scattered.
Irrational, stupid, PEOPLE.

.. Where was I..?
.. My hand, my aura..
Oh yeah.
This awakening is getting seriously on my nerves!
I can’t go five minutes without drifting off on some thought tangent.

=======

“Han?”
Sarah looked relieved when I blinked a few times and let my mage sight slip away.

“Sorry, got lost for a second there”
She smiled at me nervously and waved toward me with the hand not holding up her riot shield.
“You okay? Got.. that under control?”

My fingers twitched.
Without any actual conscious thought, a needle like icicle formed out of thin air and slammed itself a few inches deep into the wall to my left.

“Definitely not under control”
I frowned and focused on the feel of the magic in my hand.
“Give me a minute”

It’s a bit harder to do when you’re not working with an element you understand I guess.
I doubt anyone else has had this problem before, but the same trick should work just as well with ice as it did with fire.

The problem is, what can I use to divert the ice effect?
Fire was easy, fire and orange are pretty connected and at that point I was so used to burning stuff and how to stop it that it wasn't even that much of a problem to start with.

Ice though.. and with THIS level of control..
I've never had my magic so eager to be used before that it would spontaneously react with a thought!
Something’s wrong here..

My best working theory at the moment is that whatever the storyteller guy did with that second brand has screwed up my magic somehow.

He mentioned that it should limit me from high level magic but it doesn't FEEL like I'm limited in any way.
If anything I feel BOOSTED, I feel like I could warp to the moon and back just for fun honestly..

My magic’s cold, which is a majorly weird feeling still, but it’s much more concentrated then usual.
I can’t focus on it for too long.
The feeling in my core is just too intense.

It’s almost calling to me to let it lose.
I can tell just at a glance that diving into my core at the moment would be.. euphoric?
It would be disastrous too.
Knowing my luck, I’d end up accidentally causing the next ice-age with THIS much power built up.. but for me it would feel so blissfully nice..

.. damn it! I lost focus again!..

Magic.. Ice.. how to change it.. think..
What do I associate with ice that isn't going to be so blatant when it happens that I can’t go out in public just in case it goes off?
First thought is liquids from ice.. drinks maybe?

Ice goes really well with drinks to cool you down..
Ice can melt into water, which is a drink..
Vodka Martini on the rocks..
Ice-pops.. Slushies!

Okay, liquids are a definite route for now.
I can ask Fena for a better idea later.
Better wet then throwing ice spikes.

Shouldn't take too long.
Take the idea ‘Ice to liquid’, take a sample of my magic, twist the two and seal the connection in my head..

“Oww..”
Last time I did this my head felt nice and warm.
This time I've got brain-freeze.

I hate magic sometimes..

======

My eyes opened and I let out a long sigh.

“Better?”
Sarah looked a bit worried but she seemed to know what I was trying to do at least.

We shared a smile.

She waved at me encouragingly but didn't move from behind her shield.
I don’t blame her for wanting to see proof that it worked before letting her guard down.
I hesitated for a moment but it DID need testing I guess.

“Do something to upset me?”

Sarah’s face lit up in glee.
It was probably a bad idea to give her a blank slate like that..

“MY SISTER HAS A CRUSH ON THE HUB RECEPTIONIST!”

My ears burned in embarrassment.
“SHUT UP!”

A chill went down my spine, pooled at my waist and slowly travelled down my legs to pool again at my feet.

We both stood there stunned for a moment.

“Did you just wet yourself?”
My face burned even brighter red in embarrassment.
Sarah face had a mix of disbelief and amazement on it which didn't suit her at all.

With a careful hold on my embarrassment to not make things even worse I glared at Sarah.
“Would you prefer an ice shard in your face?”

She blanched and shook her head rapidly.
My sister’s not stupid..

“Looks like, instead of making ice crystals, I'm making water from my back now”
Her eyebrow popped up at me.
“Just water” I added to shut up her scepticism.

Sarah considered me from behind her shield for a moment and then slowly let it slide away.
She walked over and gave me an awkward hug, trying to avoid touching any of the water on my back and legs.

“It’s just temporary, I’ll talk to Edith later and see if she has any better ideas”
Sarah seemed reassured by that but didn't comment in return.

“Do you think they can give me some spare scrubs?”
My hospital issue patients dress, gown, thing felt awkward and heavy with all the water trailing down my back.
“I'm not gonna wear my clothes when I'm like this”
Sarah winced but nodded in understanding.
“Wouldn't work anyway, your clothes are a write off. Your jeans and boots.. whatever you did to get free of the ice didn't treat them nicely.”

I frowned and huffed.

“Partly melted, partly charred, missing a lot of the thread and patches of leather?”
Sarah nodded and squinted at me a little.
“I expected it, the heat had to come from somewhere. Usually it’s barely noticeable while using it to dry clothes but I had to kind of supercharge it..”

My frown dipped a bit more and my hand came up to slap my forehead.
“Duh..”
A small amount of focus and a push to my core set off the spell.
The hospital gown dried instantly.
It didn't do anything for my damp legs or the puddle at my feet but at least my back was dry now.
“If you can get me some scrubs I should be able to keep dry better. My legs are still wet at the moment.”
Sarah nodded and made her way out.

=======

I spent the time she was gone practising with the water.
If I forced an emotion forward enough I could trigger it on purpose, a lot like I could do with my fire but even then it came easier than the fire ever had.
For some reason my elemental affinity seems to be on a hair trigger now and I have no idea how to stop it.
At least after a few tries I managed to change where the water formed, instead of getting a wet patch trailing down my back I could make the water come out of my hands and feet.
I even managed to make it come out of my hair, although that just left me with damp hair plastered to my face, so I doubt I’ll be doing it again.

“They didn't have any scrubs, I bribed the ward medi-mage for her spare outfit though. It should fit.. maybe..”
Sarah stepped in the door with a bundle of clothes under her arm.
She didn't seem completely convinced that the clothes would work but anything’s better then what I currently have at least.

Without another word I tugged the hospital gown over my head.

There’s little modesty between us.
It comes from doing quick changes of outfits since we were kids.
Sarah DID seem unusually interested when I stood before her naked though.
I guess the change in body IS a bit off putting.
I'm just trying not to think about it.

When she didn't hand them to me directly I ended up having to snatch the clothing from her instead.
That seemed to break her of her trance-like stare at least.
I laid out the clothes on the bed for inspection.

The undies were utilitarian, white cotton with a wide cut, they looked comfortable so that’s something..
The bra looked a bit big for my shoulders but it would be tight everywhere else, probably a sports bra from the looks of it.
The top was just a plain T-shirt in olive green, nice and boring.
For my legs we had some leggings, a knee-high black pleated skirt and some soft sole ballet flats.
Overall, not a bad haul.
I didn't waste any time getting dressed, I just want to get out of here now.

The bra was a bit awkward, it fit but was generally too tight feeling.
I've never liked sports bras, even when I was just filling in for Sarah with no actual boobs to compress.
They felt too constricting.

Beggars can’t be choosers though.

The ballet flats were nice and soft at least.
I’ll have to look at getting some more of them later.

When I’d finished pulling myself together, Sarah grabbed a brush out of her purse and waved me to sit down.
She hit a few snags but generally just brushed my hair to hang flat down.
I’ll have to see if I can cut it back to our usual length.
Having it hanging around my shoulders like this is annoying..

“We’re cleared to leave, they set you up an appointment with the Rep from ‘Awakened Mage Support’ later this week but physically your fine at least.”

My face scrunched up a little in annoyance.
I'm not up to testing this new brand yet.
I've never heard of this ‘Awakened mage support’ before but I guess it can’t hurt to see what they want.
If it comes to it, I’ll keep my back to a wall and push my new water talent to full blast, if I push hard enough I should be able to imitate a point blank fire-hose with a bit of practice.

“Ready?”
I nodded and she took my hand to lead me out of the room.

The medi-bay mage offered me a strained smile but everyone else seemed pretty tense at the sight of me.
I put my head down and followed Sarah.
If I don’t react maybe we can finally get out of here.
The sooner I can get to Fena’s shop for some research materials and help, the better.

She led me out of the medi-bay and through a lot of turning corridors.
As we walked along there was a general hush that would form up and when we passed the sound would build up again as whispers in our wake.

I could feel myself getting tense because of it.

I don’t like people paying so much attention to me.
My job has made me healthily paranoid against people staring at me.
Especially if they are being so blatant when talking about me behind my back.

We came out of the corridors into the main reception area.
I lifted my head a little to look for Felicia.
She was sat at her desk.

It hurt to see the fear in her eyes.
She tracked me the entire way, while we walked to the exit.
As we stepped out of the entrance way I just caught the huge sigh of relief she gave off before she sunk down in her seat.

“Don’t worry, things will work out eventually. I got a briefing while you were unconscious.”
I frowned and tugged her hand a little for a better explanation.
“I’ll explain at the flat. It’s not great but it could be worse too, so don’t panic”
I opened my mouth to question her logic but stopped short when her mobile started ringing in her purse.

She let go of my hand and fished around frantically for it.
When she finally got it out she stared at the screen a little for some reason.

“It’s mum..”
She sounded confused by that fact.
I stood awkwardly to the side while she answered the call.

“Hey mum I-”
Sarah frowned deeply.
“What?.. I didn't-”
Her mouth pursed tightly in annoyance.
“What are you.. no I.. Mum will you just.. Of course sh- I mean..”

Sarah’s eyes went wide in surprise, her head swung around to stare at me with worry.
“She’s here now.. yeah I g-”
She growled low in her throat and tightened her grip on her phone.
“Yes.. Mother..”
She sounded really angry now, she was talking through clenched teeth.
“We’ll be there soon”
Sarah hung up without saying goodbye and stared at me with a lost look.

“What is it?”

She took a deep breath in and huffed it out.
This is going to be bad..

“Mum’s been trying to call for ages.”
I nodded, it made sense, the Hub cuts off cell phone services.
It cuts off most things actually, if you work in the Hub there’s no TV or radio available sadly.

Sarah’s teeth clenched again and she glared at her phone.
“She wanted to know if I’d ‘stolen Arista on the way home from school again’ and if I was ‘trying to corrupt my poor impressionable little sister’.. and THEN she demanded that I bring you back home RIGHT now or she’s calling the cops on me for kidnapping..”

My jaw dropped.
We both stood there in a kind of stunned silence.

My brain finally tweaked on a forgotten detail..
I was so busy getting worked up at him at the time, it just hadn't registered initially.
The storyteller.. that son of a bitch!

“Crap”
It came out as a whimper.
I could do nothing BUT whimper at this.. things are about to get a whole lot more complicated.

Sometimes.. I REALLY hate magic.

Family is complicated, especially when magic is involved.. It feels like I've said something like that before? Events unfold including but not limited to: Sarah driving carefully (not that anyone cares to compliment her on it) And Hannah discovers a new-found hatred for royal red tartan.

“This isn't going to be pretty Sarah”
She frowned at me but I shrugged down a bit more in my seat instead of explaining again.

We needed to be clear on that fact above all others.
This is NOT going to be fun.

We hadn't really spoken on the ride over to Mum’s place, the radio kept things from feeling too awkward but both of us are pretty tense.
Sarah seems really shaken from Mum’s phone call.
I've been trying to work out all the ways this can go wrong in my head and how I can fix them.

I think Sarah’s worked out at least part of what’s happened.

The Storyteller said he would ‘help me settle in with my new family’.
I didn't even think about it at the time.
As far as he was concerned I've already gotten Sarah ‘on my side’, so he sent someone after Mum..

I don’t know what parameters his memory squad will have set but Mum now thinks I’m her teenage daughter named ‘Arista’ and she’s got some serious trust issues with Sarah out of nowhere.

“Magic did this?”
I glanced at her then turned my head back to staring blankly at the wooded hills that obscured Upper Klamath Lake from view.

We used to go swimming in the Lake when we were kids.
A bit further up, nearer to our h.. nearer to Mum’s place.

I don’t want to go back to that house..

My last visit didn't end any better than the one before it
..the one that saw me kicked out with nothing but the clothes on my back..

Mum couldn't handle one of her kids being anything but a vanilla pure heterosexual.

Considering how messed up I was at the time..
I'm not even sure those sort of labels could have been applied to me back then, let alone now!

A male body with millennia of a women’s thoughts shoved inside it.
Would that mean I was a heterosexual male or a mostly lesbian female in the wrong body?

Now I've got a female body, but Arista’s memories are separated away from me.
I don’t have to let myself accept her tastes anymore..
Is it weird that I've grown to like having both sides of things?

It’s not like I've dated much.
Fena gets my attention, she knows it and enjoys teasing me with her body.
After.. after Karl.. I've not looked at a man in the same way, I’ll flirt for fun or a mission but..

What am I now?
Born male, with a woman’s core, I settled on bisexual reluctantly but I've only truly fallen for one person.
I was always the lesser twin too, which doesn't help my self-image.
Being the one who got roped into crossdressing by Sarah, the favourite, whenever she could.. that only adds more fuel to the complicated mess in my head!

.. Now I'm genetically female with mixed feelings about it all, it would be worse I guess..

Mum freaked out when she thought I was gay.
What the hell is her head going to come up with to fill in the blanks about the ‘new me’ after this memory modification?

Powers help me, if she decides ‘Arista’ is anything but her definition of ‘normal’ I'm in for SUCH a headache!

=======

“Han?”
My head jerked away from the window.

We’d followed the Falls Highway out of town while I was busy thinking.
Sarah was just turning off at the ‘Running Y Resort’ sign to head into the twisting forest roads leading to Mum’s place.

I could just see the Ice Arena’s roof peeking through some trees on the hill as we pulled into the resorts long drive.
The arena’s closed, obviously.
It doesn't usually open up until November, the whole place is an open air Ice-rink, so keeping it going during the Oregon summer heat would be a stupid idea.

Mum used to take use there as kids..
Dad would stand outside and watch, he was never any good at skating.
The only time I saw him even try was during the, semi-regular, ‘Father-Daughter Skate’ evenings they hosted.
He looked like a Giraffe on the ice, all legs flying and unsteady wobbling.
Sarah used to love going on the ice with him on those nights though.
I’d sit in the stands and watch them.

..It felt wholly unfair at the time..

It didn't help that Sarah got to take figure skating lessons but Mum pulled me out of Hockey.
Apparently I got hurt too much.
I wasn't exactly good on the ice, and even at that age the other boys were bigger than me.

I’d watched the Curling and Broomball games a few times, when I was home bored during the holidays.
That route to ‘skating fun’ got dismissed quickly, if anything they looked more violent then Hockey did!

======

“Han!”
My head jerked up to look at Sarah again.
She looked a bit annoyed now.

I mumbled an apology and couldn't fight down a blush.

My brain still isn't right.
Coming back to this area is the last thing I need right now.
Every little thing seems to be setting me off on a trip down memory lane.

We took a sharp left on to Cooper’s hawk road.
The same left we always take..

I managed to get a glance at the little mini-mall of shops put in place for the Running Y Ranch Resort’s customers.
It looks like a new restaurant has open?
If I'm going to be in the area, I might have to drop in and check it out.

While living so far out of town has its bonuses, the thing that made my teenage years more bearable was having the resort nearby.
The Arnold Palmer Golf course, a little further up the road brought in locals who would hang around a lot but as people got to know me and Sarah, most of them tended to avoid me.

The resort isn't huge, it IS pretty popular though, if I dressed nice and hung out near the tennis courts long enough I tended to be able to find some new ‘friends’ to hang out with.
For two weeks I got to be anyone I wanted to be, then they would go home and I could move on with life without all the baggage usually involved in that sort of thing.
..it’s kinda sad in hindsight..

=======

Sarah zig-zagged her way along Cooper’s hawk road, the rocking knocked me out of my thoughts.
I could see a few people in the distance hitting balls on the golf course.

The course is always busy this time of year.
Good weather for it apparently, I wouldn't know, I've never really got into golf.

Mum’s place is downrange to one of the longer, straighter greens.
So golf, to me, brings to mind the sound of smashing windows and Mum arguing with a course rep over the repair cost.
It may have soured me to the sport in general..

======

“Are you okay?”
I glanced at Sarah and offered her a wan smile.

“Don’t think I'm ready to be back here right now..”
My hand came up to tap my forehead.
“Too many memories bobbing around, it’s making me a bit floaty”

Sarah focused back on the road for a second to turn off of Cooper’s and onto Kestrel Road instead, then glanced back over to me.

“We can just go you know? I doubt mum would really call the cops on me..”

I shook my head at her.
It was nice that she would offer but if the situation is as bad as I think then leaving mum alone at the moment could be dangerous.
The woman who lost her magical, mutant dog and gained a fear of dogs in return comes to mind.

“I..”
My voice trailed off a little as I tried to get everything I wanted to say in order.
“..If what’s going on is what I think is going on, then she needs someone with her right now.. and it doesn't sound like you are going to be able to help her.. for once.”

Sarah frowned at me and slowed down as we reached the crossroads into Osprey Court.
Mum’s little cul-de-sac of two houses that she shares with the Martials house is just a left turn away.
The good thing about this area is that during the day there’s very little traffic.
So Sarah coming to a stop in the middle of the street isn't THAT much of a big deal.

I’d not really being paying attention to it but Sarah’s been driving slower than usual, almost cautiously?

A glance down reminded me that she should have a cast on her foot.
She’s got some kind of padded brace on it now, but the big bulky cast is gone at least.
She must have got one of the medi-bay mage’s to heal her up..

..I need to look into healing..

It’s too useful of a skill set for me to overlook.
It would be kind of nice to be able to help people like that too..
If I’d known healing I could have fixed Sarah’s foot before we left Bolivia.
If I’d known healing I could have saved K-

======

My head jerked a little and I finished the motion off by shaking my head violently from side to side.

..No use diving back into that territory.. that way leads to madness..

“Ready?”
I think Sarah had some kind of idea where my mind had gone.
She looked worried and a little sad.
I wasn't ready, but my head bobbed in agreement anyway.

She revved the engine and swung us left onto the cul-de-sac

The Martials house was the same as always.
Someone must be home, there’s a car in their driveway.

Reluctantly I turned my head to face mum’s place.
It hasn't changed either.
The grass is a bit parched near the front of the house, the areas without shade from the tree’s nearby at least, but apart from that..

I huffed in a deep breath and stared up at the house while Sarah pulled us in front of the garage.

It’s a weirdly shaped building.
I think originally it was a lot smaller?

Not sure who did what, but this side of the house is roughly ‘house shaped’.
Well, bungalow shaped at least.
Most of the first floor isn't visible from the driveway, the house is built into the hill a bit.

From this side it looks like a general, single-story box building with a slanted roof.
Most of the wall space is taken up by the garage and mum’s little rockery garden.

If I squint a little it’s pretty obvious that the wood cladding’s paint is a bit chipped.
I guess, without me around to paint it each summer, mum’s let it go a little?

======

“Com’ on. Can’t hide in here forever”
I smiled at Sarah and pouted a little.

“Are you sure we can’t? I think it could work..”
She snorted and pulled herself out of the driver seat.

She seems a lot steadier on her feet without the bulky cast at least.
How I missed that for so long is beyond me?
I guess.. I AM a bit out of it.
Everyone at the Hub treating me weird didn't help much either.

When I got out of the car Sarah shot me a mischievous look and nodded over her shoulder at the drop off, because the house is built into the hill, just past mum’s little rockery is a sharp drop to the second floor.
We used it as a short-cut as kids.

Mum hated it.
The aluminium siding that gives extra support to that side wall also blocks the view of anyone walking around there from both floors.

She used to say something about thinking we were burglars.. or wolves?
She never really explained that one..

Naturally, being kids, it only encouraged us to use it.

======

I hopped over the rockery to the other side easy enough.
Sarah looked slightly annoyed that she had to take the long way around the rockery and stumble her way down the slope instead of jumping.
We met back up at the bottom and quietly sneaked around to the REAL front of the house.

This is where the house gets weird looking.

It’s still generally box shaped, although more of a two-story house then the bungalow you can see from the driveway.
Someone, at some point, added a long porch and equally long balcony, stacked on top of each other to the rear of the house.

If you stand on the balcony you can look out over the trees at the mountains and catch a glimpse of the golf courses in-between.
I used to love standing on the top balcony at night, we’re far enough away from town that the stars out here are amazing.

..It’s one of the biggest things I miss about this place since I left..

Tucked into the far side from us is a round little two-story house extension.
It really shouldn't work with the rest of the house, but it does.
It gives the building some odd charm to it.
The curves are completely at odds with the rest of the houses straight lines though.

The first floor of it is made entirely out of rough cut stone, just to compound how much it stands out.
They have an interesting pattern, but again, don’t match with the wooden cladding around the rest of the house.

The top floor easily explains why it was added at least.

Around the walls of the ‘mini-tower’ built into the side of the house is a ring of small, waist to ceiling, windows.
They give an AMAZING view of the local area.
I don’t know if mums changed it since but we used to have the dining room table tucked in there so we could look out over the mountains with dinner.

In the summer you can pop all the windows wide open and there’s a nice, fresh feeling breeze that blasts through the house.

=======

We stepped carefully though mums Begonia bush and out onto the little built up rocky sloped path leading to the house.

Apparently the family that owned the house before us had their grandmother living with them.
They had the house upgraded to be more wheelchair accessible.
There’s an elevator in the house near the kitchen too.

Mum always told us off for using it, so when she was out we’d use it all the time and giggle to each other about it.

Dad would use it while she was standing in the kitchen watching him, just to annoy her.
He did a lot of things like that.
Mum would act annoyed and shout his name but you could tell she found it funny too.

Before things changed at least..

======

Sarah’s hand came down reassuringly on my shoulder.
I brought mine up and cupped hers back.

I don’t think either of us was REALLY ready to face mum right now.
Sarah’s just better at hiding it then me..

We paced up the stairs to the porch and I gingerly knocked on the back door.
From inside we could hear some footsteps.

I could see some movement through the glass door.
When the dark figure inside came more into focus, I unconsciously held my breath.

She smiled brightly at me but her smile dipped a little when she glanced over at Sarah.

She’s aged a bit since I last saw her.
Her hairs different too, shorter.
She was wearing a lazy pair of jeans and wide necked T-shirt, the uniform she usually dons to do housework.

We both stepped back a little as she swung the door open and quickly came forward to sweep me up into a tight hug.

My mouth didn't want to co-operate.
There was a lump in my throat while mum squeezed me lovingly.

“Hi mum..”
It came out sounding a lot more heartbroken then I’d intended, but it’s not like I could stop that!

Slowly my arms came up to hug her back and I squeezed tightly.
It’s been so long since we’ve hugged..

=======

After almost half a minute we pulled apart.

Mum smiled and cupped my cheek with her hand.
Her eyes jumped from my green T-shirt, down the black skirt and leggings to settle on my comfortable flats.

She looked back up and nodded at me in approval.
It shouldn't have made me feel as good as it did.

She slid her arm around my hip in a loose one sided hug and turned to face Sarah.
Instantly her face darkened in disapproval.

“Sarah”
Even her voice had gone cold.

“Mother”
Sarah matched her tone easily.

I held my breath.
Getting between them when their fighting is always messy.
A little aborted step to the side showed that mum wasn't letting me out of her grip any time soon.

So much for running away from the line of fire..

“Still living the degenerate life-style of Hollywood excess with your.. partner..?”
My breath caught in my throat.

Oh.. crap..

Sarah’s face scrunched up in confusion.
She’s a TV star, not Hollywood.
She doesn't get out enough as it is, always busy working.
.. and partner.. said in that exact tone..

Sarah has less experience with memory modification then I do but I think she’s connecting the dots pretty well..

Mum knew she had two children.
She knew that she loved her daughter very much.
She knew she was angry at one of her children for living a lifestyle she disapproved of and threw the child out of her house for being ‘gay’..
..Then the memory modification came in and told her that she had a second daughter, one who was too young to live on her own and that she loves too dearly to just kick out like that anyway..

Her brain jumped the gates and played mental hopscotch until the facts matched her memories.
So now I'm the apparent ‘golden child’ and Sarah..

“Not that it’s any of your concern, but I'm living alone at the Granvue Apartments on North 5th Street in town.”
Mum’s face went blank and she seemed to be trying to process that information.

Not good!
The more times this happens the worse it will get.

I need to give mum an information dump to get things into a workable story or this is going to go south quickly!

Luckily I had the drive over here to consider things.

I pulled my mouth into my best ‘Sarah being cute’ pout and tugged slightly on mums arm.
Her eyes slid a little down to focus on me but she remained blank faced while her brain worked to fix the broken jigsaw puzzle back together into some kind of order.

“Mum, we need to go shopping for stuff for me soon. I can’t keep borrowing Sarah’s stuff!”

Her eyebrows furrowed a little in confusion as she tried to fit that information into her head too.
Sarah was giving me a suspicious look but a wave of my free hand, out of mum’s view range, told her to just go with it.

“I can’t believe daddy just dropped me on you like this. I'm so sorry it’s made things strained between you and Sarah..”
Mum blinked.

“She showed me the local area today, her boyfriend Tor drove us around in her little old car”
Sarah made a strangled squawk of indignation but didn't argue.
I think she’s starting to understand what I'm doing.

“We bumped into Al near the library too. He was holding hands with a big hairy guy.. it was so gross”
Mum’s eyebrow twitched hard and she frowned a little.

It hurt to have to do this.. but the only way to make mums fluid memories work out properly, without causing even MORE problems the next time she talks to anyone, is to make things as close to ‘normal’ as possible for her.

I have to slander the old me for her, clear Sarah’s name and..
..and make myself into the ‘long lost’ daughter, who’s just returned after leaving with Dad in the divorce.

It’s the only way I can see that won’t lead mum into a meltdown and cause a LOT of trouble in the long run.

I WILL find whoever did this to her and I WILL hurt them!
I'm going to shove their head so far up the storyteller-guy’s ass that they will be known as the world’s first quadruped, non-centaur, human beings!

“I'm so glad I got accepted into the Gladstone advanced tuition program in town, the local schools looked so DULL when Sarah showed them to me.”

‘Gladstone’ is the code name used for the Hub among people that don’t know what’s going on.
They hide under a private company funded by private investors when necessary.
Their lofty goal is said to be ‘to do good in the world’..
Its sanctimonious garbage honestly but it works, most of the time, as a cover story.
So who am I to complain?

Faking paperwork for an ‘advanced tuition program’ shouldn't be too hard.
It will get mum off my back about school and free me up to go to meetings at the Hub when needed which is the important bit.
The last thing I need is to set off my new brand by being dragged to a REAL school instead of turning up to an appointment!

“We were all just going to go inside and have lunch before going to the mall to get me some clothes and stuff for my new bedroom.”

Mum seemed a little less dazed.

That’s a good sign.
It means the story her brain is building isn't as confusing and frustrating for her to handle as the previous one.

Sarah glanced between mum and me but didn't say anything, just in case she messed something up.
I focused on mum and tried not to move.

Her first reaction when she comes out of the daze is key.
If I've covered most things well enough, she should be calm.
If not..

======

After almost a solid minute of us all just standing there in silence, mum blinked her eyes furiously and her face settled into odd mix of emotions.

It finally cleared and she blinked rapidly at me.
Slowly her mouth formed up into a bright smile and she hugged me just as tight as she had the first time.

“It’s so good you girls are home. Come on, I’ll make us some lunch, then we can go shopping”
She smiled teasingly at Sarah and nudged her stunned shoulder a little as she walked past her.

“You can eat, right Sare? You didn't let that Tor-boy get you lunch already did you?”
She walked back in the door with a bounce in her step.
“The way he act’s sometimes, you would think he’s convinced you should be eating for two..”
Her smile was a little mischievous
She gave Sarah a big cheesy wink and moved on to the kitchen with a laugh.

Sarah stood stock still, sputtering in a mix of confusion and denial.
I gave her a sympathetic look with slight nudge to help refocus her attention.

“I'm NOT pregnant!”
I jumped back from her a little in surprise but mums laugh inside got louder for a second in response.

Sarah growled low in her throat for a moment.
As the seconds passed she seemed to come back to her senses with surprising speed.

She looked at me suspiciously and flicked her wrist.

The flick demanded to know what the hell was going on.
Nice to know we can still use twin speak!

I dropped my voice to a whisper and leaned closer to her so mum couldn't hear us.

“It’s the best I could do. Someone modified her memories, she shifted all her hate for me.. for Al, onto you. It was either this or make things even worse by leaving her like that..”

Sarah frowned for a moment and eventually pouted instead.
“Did you have to tell her about Tor? I haven’t even asked him out yet!”

I grinned at her and nudged her shoulder one more time.

“Yet..”
She blushed.
“Anyway, it was either that or she’d be convinced you were a very boring lesbian. Take your pick? I can probably change it back if I hurry..”

Sarah shuddered hard and glared at me.
She knew, as well as I did, just how bad mum could get about anything ‘gay’.

The situation’s not perfect as it is.. not by a LONG way.
I can see so much that could go wrong with just a slipped word at the moment!
But its better she be a perky and annoyingly happy ‘not-herself’ then an angry, distrusting and spiteful ‘not-herself’ at least.. right?

My shoulders shrugged automatically in response to my own question.

“Come on, food”
It’s a no-win situation honestly, all we can hope is that we manage some acceptable level of damage control at this point.

Sarah offered me a weak smile and followed me in through the door.

It felt so weird to step foot in the house again after so long.
Seeing mum smile at me slightly while she puttered around the kitchen making sandwiches didn't help..

======

“Ari sweetie, elbows off the table. Honestly, what HAS that man been teaching you?”
I frowned and ducked my head down so mum couldn't see just how annoyed she was making me.

She was never this bad with Alistor!
If she was this bad with Sarah then I didn't see it.. and she keeps calling me that damned name!

“Ari, have you decided what color you want your room to be?”

I huffed around a bite of my sandwich and opened my mouth to respond.
Mum frowned at me suddenly.
It was such a quick change that it stalled me with my mouth open.

“Don’t talk with your mouth-full.. Honestly, the way you’re behaving, it’s like that man raised you as a boy!”
I flinched automatically at that one.

Mums face went blank, obviously some part of this conversation had triggered her again.

Sarah shot me a worried look.
I tried not to look as worried as I actually felt about it all.
No use in both of us panicking..

When her face finally cleared she offered me a jumbled smile.

Eventually she let out an exasperated sigh and brought her hand up to stroke my hair.
I tried not to enjoy the contact but I’d missed her being this gentle, a lot more then I’d realised at least.

“You’re such a tomboy.”
She sounded like she wanted to be disapproving but also found the situation funny.

Sarah snorted.
Obviously she found it funny too.
Mum’s eyes cut over to her and gave her another weird smile.

She looked like she wanted to tell Sarah off but she also seemed proud of her as well.

“How you got her into a skirt today I have no idea..”
Sarah grinned at me and perked up her eyebrow.
I tried to silently tell her not to provoke the situation.
After a moment she seemed to understand why I thought mouthing off would be a bad idea this time.

“It’s not so hard, I just destroyed her other options”
She smirked at me.

I glanced at mum’s amused face and shrugged back at her.
Good enough, mum’s not gone blank again at least..

Just when I was ready to relax a little and let off a relieved sigh, mum’s head turned back to me.
I plastered on a weak smile and straightened my back a bit to show better posture.
It felt like she saw straight through me pretty quickly.
She still seemed a bit amused but gave me an apologetic look for the teasing at least.

Her eyes went back over to Sarah while her arm came up to pull me into a loose hug.
“Hopefully you can do the same magic on her while we’re out shopping.”

I flinched at the word ‘magic’.
Mum didn't seem to realise the effect of what she’d said but Sarah went momentarily slack faced because of it too.

“I wonder if the Gladstone program has some kind of official uniform?.. It’s such a prestigious organisation..”
She ruffled my hair a little and smiled at me warmly.
“My little genius..”

I blushed and ducked my head down under her praise.

“You’d look adorable in a real schoolgirl’s uniform.. like the girls at Hosanna Christian School!”

My blush died and my face paled completely.
Sarah didn't even try to hide her outright laugh at that one.

I wanted to rally against the idea.. but mums proud smile.. it hurt to even CONSIDER ruining that smile now I could see it again.
Slowly I managed to pull my grimace into a weak smile for her.

..This shopping trip is going to be HELL..

======

“I could have driven ya know..”
Mum glanced over at Sarah and huffed against her childish pout.

“Not with that leg you’re not. If I’d known you were injured, I wouldn't have let you drive home in the first place, a taxi isn't THAT expensive from town you know.”

Sarah settled back in the passenger seat, obviously she could see the logic involved, but she also seemed a bit frustrated by mums change in attitude.

It felt weird for me too.
I’d gotten used to cold and confused looks from mum over the years, she’s not looked at me the same since we were just out of our teens..
I think some part of her never truly forgot what happened at Dante’s base.

It probably made her uneasy, as if there were something about me she didn’t understand or should fear in some way.

Memory wipes are awkward things.
The memories are never REALLY gone.
They’re just sitting there, disconnected from the rest of your brain.
The connections they were tied to tend to do weird things in the meantime..

..Most of my claustrophobia comes from being in that cage with the rat-like man sniffing me..

Without a logical reason for the feelings I had about being stuck in a tight space that I couldn't escape from, my brain sorted itself out.. poorly.
Losing the memories of prom spawned a fair few phobia’s for me.
Most of them I've still not fully shaken off to this day.

Part of me kind of hoped that mum would, someday, somehow remember what happened.
She seemed honestly proud of me at the time.
Really proud that I’d used my only escape route to save Sarah..
Proud of me as ‘Al’.. for once..

======

“Han?”
My head perked up, concentration broken.
We’d come to a stop in the parking lot of the Jefferson Square strip mall.

I rubbed a hand on my cheek, just to make sure my eyes were still dry.
It felt like they shouldn't be.

“..Han?”
Mum sounded confused.

Sarah froze and cringed.

I smiled at her slightly smugly.
We could have put money on her being the first one to slip up and say something without thinking properly around mum!

Hopefully I can work this to my advantage though.

“Hannah”
Mums head swung around to me again.
“It’s my middle name, remember?”
Her eyes went a little vacant.

Obviously not enough information for her to process it properly in her current state.

“Everyone thought my first name was ‘Harry’ with the way you shorten it.”
That one got a reaction, with her being so out of it I can’t tell what kind of reaction but she twitched a little.
“After the fifth person told you how much of an ‘adorable little boy’ I was, you switched to calling me Hannah.. in public at least.”
I’d have loved to just outright tell her my new first name was ‘Hannah’ but that would trigger her brain a bit too much with the conflicting information that she already has.

She already thinks I'm a tomboy, so the little background fluff story shouldn't hurt anything and I can FINALLY get a break from her constantly calling me that annoying derivative to the dreaded ‘Arista’.

Every-time someone calls me by that name it annoys me for some reason.
My brain just yells out that my name is NOT Arista!

There’s probably something going on there.. magical or otherwise.. but I have absolutely NO idea where to start in working out what is causing it..

I'm a mage, not a psychiatrist!

=======

Sarah sighed and gave me a weak smile when I blinked my eyes a few times.
“That was freaky..”

I frowned at her in confusion.

“You and mum both went all ‘blank face’ again, in sync.. I'm getting used to it from you lately but seeing it in stereo just gave me the Heebie-Jeebies”
We both shared an amused smile.
Sarah pretended to shudder dramatically and I snorted out a laugh.

My snort seemed to jolt mum out of her daze.
She shot me a warning look and seemed a bit annoyed.

“Ladies don’t snort Arista”
My face went red again.

Sarah cackled out a laugh and snorted once herself.
Mum didn't even glance at her, let alone tell her off for it!

This is so unfair, why am I being held to a different standard!

I could feel my new face pull into one of Sarah’s pouts.
My cheeks hurt a little from the effort but I didn't stop it.
This is a situation entirely deserving of a good pout!

“Why don’t you tell Sarah off for it too?”
I couldn't hold the question in any longer.

Sarah laughed again and waggled her eyebrows at me.
“She gave up making me a lady years ago”

Mum gave her a disapproving look but didn't seem willing to correct her.

For a moment I expected mum to go back into her daze.
It felt like new information to me at least..
Maybe they've had arguments about it in the past, without me?

Sarah didn't seem annoyed about it.
If anything she was acting like it was something she’d gotten over long ago and she could now see the funny side of..

“Don’t pout Ari, you’re not a little girl anymore”
My shoulders tensed.

I think Sarah could see that I was on my last nerve with mum.
She loudly made her way out of the passenger seat and stretched in a way that even I found obscene.

“Sarah!”
Mum looked scandalised.

She quickly made her way out of the car and came around the other-side to yank Sarah’s arms back down tightly.
Her head swung around the parking lot to make sure no-one else had noticed.

Sarah cracked up laughing.

Mum looked back at her and huffed loudly.
“Wicked child”
She said it seriously but her mouth was trying to twitch up into an amused smile.

Sarah struck an over-the-top sexy pose and poked her tongue out at mum.
“I learnt from the best”

They both smiled and laughed a little at that one.

Part of me felt relieved and thankful to Sarah for distracting mum long enough for me to calm down.
As it is, my hands feel a bit wet and I think my hairs now a little damp too..
..Stupid diverted ice magic with no emotional control..

Another part of me felt a little left out honestly..

It feels like there’s a whole side to Sarah and Mum’s relationship I've never seen before, that’s just suddenly showing through today.
Am I just being paranoid?
Could it be related to the fact that I'm a girl now?..
..was I missing out on THIS many things before?

My lips pulled into a pout again without conscious effort.
My arms folded a little and I huffed to myself.

A glance outside again showed Sarah and Mum talking excitedly about something.

Figures..
I get turned into a girl.
Mum treats me nicely again.. and Sarah’s still the favourite!

=======

Eventually I’d gotten fed up of being ignored and joined them outside the car.
Naturally the moment I was in a position to join their conversation they finished it and started walking toward the shops.
I huffed and trudged along behind Sarah.

“Com’ on Han”
Sarah looped her arm around my shoulders and shook me a little.
Her hand dipped slowly down my arm.

Without warning she shot in some fingers for a quick tickle at my waist.
I jumped and squealed in an embarrassingly loud volume.

Luckily we were still a few car lengths away from nearest storefront and there didn't seem to be many people around to notice but I saw at least one man smirk in my direction!
My shoulders slumped and I huddled down to try to hide from him in Sarah’s shadow.

“Don’t do that..”
She frowned at me with worry.

“You've been really quite since the car.. I could see that Mum was getting to you..”
She wanted me to spill but I felt stupid enough already.

It’s not really about her.
I'm just being stupid..

I guess, at some point..
With this whole ‘mum being memory modified’ thing.. I kinda thought I might become the favourite?
I know it’s stupid, and greedy.. and I should just be happy that she’s willing to smile at me now..

..But somewhere in the back of my head I've always had this nagging feeling that mum would have liked me more.. loved me more.. if I was a girl for real?.. like Sarah..

A.. And now I am one.. but she’s got all these little stories and so much history already with Sarah!
Stuff that I've never even seen before..

I'm shut out still.

It’s different but.. it hurts..
It hurts a lot.
More than I expected it to, honestly.
I thought I’d gotten over this kind of thing..

I'm an adult!

I made up my mind a LONG time ago that I wouldn't let mum get to me anymore!
I'm a powerful mage!
I'm BEYOND caring about her..

..but it still hurts, ya know?

======

I smiled weakly at Sarah and tried to keep my lip from trembling.

She didn't look convinced.
I didn't feel convinced either.

My hands are really damp..
.. stupid diverted ice magic..

“Come on girls!”
Mum waved excitedly from the doorway to the big ‘Ross’ clothing store.
It’s not exactly upmarket, but this is Klamath Falls, Oregon.
It’s not like we’re cruising through Portland or something.

Hell, even Eugene or Medford have better shops then we do!

Maybe I'm being a bit negative?
..I'm not really in the mood for shopping anymore..

Sarah put her hand lightly on my shoulder and steered me towards Mum.
“Let’s just get this over with.”

I couldn't agree with her more.

======

“Hannah, couldn't you just try on one of these?”
Mum sounded frustrated.
I growled at the back of my throat and we locked eyes in a stare off.

I'm not in the mood for shopping!
I'm getting the stuff I need!
I don’t need more stupid dresses and skirts!

Within the first twenty minutes of being in the store I’d gotten everything I needed.
The cart is half full with five pairs of jeans in my new size, a mix bag of T-shirts, two pairs of thick boots and a weeks worth of new undies.

Sarah was bad enough, she kept slipping extra stuff into the cart.
I already caught her putting some cami-tops, leggings, a pair of sandals and a box of starter makeup in there!
Who KNOWS what else she’s managed to put in while I've been distracted with mum?!

Mum seems obsessed with the idea that I need to be more feminine.

Maybe the newest lie I had to spin in the car went a bit too far?
I think some part of her resents the idea someone may have thought her daughter was a ‘son’ at some point in her new made up life-history.

I have no idea what her brain might have done to fill in the blanks, but she seems convinced that I'm the world’s biggest tomboy and in dire need of a complete wardrobe makeover suddenly.
She even tried to take my jeans away!

For a moment I broke eye-contact with mum.
She seemed to take that as a win because she added a few of the dresses in her arm to the cart.

My eyes caught on Sarah.
She looked suspiciously innocent.
There was something, several something’s actually, hidden behind her back.

My view of her became obstructed for a crucial moment.

Mum was holding a red, pleated tartan skirt up to my waist.
By the time I managed to look past her head, I just caught Sarah dropping several pairs of entirely too short-shorts into the cart.
They looked familiar, if I didn't know any better, I’d swear she’d managed to find a few different colored versions of the annoyingly tiny ‘adventurer shorts’ she uses while filming her show!

“Stop fidgeting”
I glanced back down at mum.
She seemed really focused on the tartan skirt.

My temper flared again.
Some part of my mind rebelled against the very idea of wearing that skirt!

It’s offensive!

Why would I, one of the elders of Monadh Rois, wear that filthy English Stewart pattern!
The Graham’s of Montrose have our OWN tartan!

It’s not even the right COLORS, let alone pattern!
I should know, I designed it!
I-

My head throbbed for a second.
It broke off my diatribe mid-thought.

.. what the hell was that?..

I glanced around quickly, mum had seemingly moved on to find more stuff to torture me into getting.
The skirt she’d been holding up to my waist was visible, peeking out of the top of the cart with a few more of its brethren.
Apparently she’d given up all pretence of letting me chose my clothes..

More importantly though.
WHAT the HELL was THAT?!

For a second there I wasn't ME.
I felt a flare of indignation and thoughts that weren't mine came shoving forward with force.

It felt kinda like how I used to feel before Inner-Hannah took over controlling my access to all the past-incarnations.. just a lot more focused, as if there were less interference trying to break the connection.

For a second there, I really WAS Lady Arista Montrose, or Graham or whatever name she was using!
I KNOW that name, I KNOW those memories.
That’s one of my more vocal past-incarnations!

What the hell is she doing showing up like that?!

I’d broken out in a cold sweat too..well.. maybe not a cold sweat after all.
From the feel of it, the more likely cause would be this stupid ‘Ice to water’ filter acting up again.
All of my skin feels clammy and a little wet now.. not a very comfortable feeling.

With a mental push I wordlessly cast the clothes drying spell again on my outfit.
If this keeps up I'm going to end up destroying more than one set of clothes today but I can’t just walk around like that, it would look weird if nothing else.

I've got major problems, I wasn't in the mood to shop beforehand but now..
I need to get out of here!

I need time to calm down and meditate, to find my focus again.

It’s been a rough couple of days.
That’s not even counting all this new weirdness with one of my past-incarnations slipping past Inner-Hannah’s, so far, near perfect control!

I need to meditate as soon as possible and find out just what the HELL is going on with my head!

======

My eyes scanned around me.
Mum seemed to be happily searching through a nearby aisle.
I think it’s the one with handbags, purses and hair accessories in it.

Sarah was further up my own aisle, looking at sleep-shirts and nighties apparently.

If I stop arguing with mum and tell Sarah to give it a rest, most likely with the promise of another shopping trip later on, I can probably cut this shopping trip down quite a bit.
If I feign body-image issues I can hopefully get out of trying it all on right now in-store too.
They have a good returns policy here..

With any luck I can be out of here within an hour.

Thirty minutes’ drive to mum’s place and maybe.. twenty minutes to unpack everything?
Then I can pretend to be tired and get a good hour of solitude in my new bedroom to do a quick dive into my mindscape!

It’s a solid plan.
It may not work, but when do my plans EVER work the way their supposed to?

Some nagging voice in the back of my head finally surfaced enough for me to realise what it wanted.

My eyes cut over to the cart.
It was stupid.
It was pointless.
It would probably start me off on another argument with mum and delay my much needed meditation even more.. but I need to do it, it feels really important for some reason..

My hand slipped carefully over to the cart.
With lose fingers I picked up the offending articles of clothing and slowly slipped them behind my back.

A few steps to my left and I reached their rack.
Slipping them back into place rewarded me with a small rush of happy endorphins.

I’d almost made it away scot-free when my hand twitched and my head pulsed a little.
My eyes trailed back to the racks.
I couldn't help but cringe.

..You've GOT to be kidding me..

My hand slowly came up and with a practised motion I must have picked up from somewhere, I flicked through the rack until I found a few of the new annoyances in my size.
Reluctantly I turned back to the cart and deposited them inside.

I just KNOW I'm going to regret this.

My eyes scanned around to see if anyone noticed what I was doing.
I caught mum’s judging stare.
After a moment her face slipped into a small smile of approval and she turned back to whatever was on the rack in front of her.

Looks like that’s it then..

I'm now the not so proud owner of five freshly replaced pleated tartan skirts.
Apparently the meaningless blue and green version of the skirts, unlike the ‘Royal Stewart’ red ones, were less offensive to the annoyingly vocal Scottish past-incarnation that has decided to stick her nose in to my business so rudely!

I don’t understand why.
They still look wrong to my eyes, the pattern is far more highlander then I should feel comfortable with, especially since the sacking of Mugdock castle..

..Why do I even know that?..

My head throbbed again.

Fine, fine.
Message received.
Don’t argue, just go with it.

I swear, when I can get into my mindscape, some uppity little Scottish bitch is getting her ass handed to her!

======

“Will there be anything else Ma’am?”
I squinted my eyes at the cashier angrily.
He seemed a bit put off by my look but mum didn't notice it.

“That’s all, thanks”
She packed away her card and grabbed a few bags, Sarah grabbed a few more which left me with the remaining ones to carry out.

It had taken a bit more effort than I’d hoped to convince mum to let me skip out of trying the clothes on in-store.
She wasn't happy to miss that part of the clothes shopping ritual apparently.

Sarah came to my rescue at last and between the two of us we convinced her that Sarah would bring me back tomorrow if there are any returns.

I may have had to concede a few things as well to keep the peace afterwards..
To go with the classic ‘catholic school uniform’ style tartan skirts that gave me such a headache until I could swap out their colors, mum added some white blouses, knee high socks and chunky heeled Mary Jane shoes.

.. yep.. she bought me a damn school uniform!..

I SWEAR, if I have to wear that outfit every time I go to ‘advanced tuition’ at the Hub..
I won’t be held responsible if I kill someone, most likely the first guy who makes a comment about it!

I huffed and sloped my shoulders a little to drag the shopping bags across the floor.
If I'm lucky I’ll tear a hole in one and the uniform will fall out before we get to the car.

I’d barely taken a few steps with the bag’s dragging around noisily before mum turned around to glare at me in admonishment.

“Ladies don’t slouch Hannah”

My jaw clenched down hard, biting back the string of profanity I wanted to throw back at her.
After a moment to gather my dwindling calm I pulled my shoulders back and lifted the bags up.
Mum seemed satisfied, she turned back to talking with Sarah at least.

I pouted and slouched down again, not enough to drag the bags but as a sign of defiance nonetheless.

“Ladies don’t slouch Hannah”
I repeated it in a quiet nasally grumble.

“Ladies don’t snort Hannah”
There was a little heat to my voice but I still kept it quite so mum couldn't hear me.
“Ladies don’t, Ladies don’t, Ladies don’t..”

My head throbbed.
I wanted to bring a hand up to stroke it better but my hands were full.
My hands are getting a bit damp too from my lack of control and I could feel my eyes watering a little.

..I'm not a damn Lady, I don’t CARE what they don’t do!..

“Come on Han”
I bit back the instinctive snarl that almost rolled out of my mouth.

Sarah was giving me a sympathetic look, out of mum’s line of sight.
My shoulders lost a little tension and I felt strangely better.

I may be having troubles and we’re not really ‘twins’ anymore but it’s nice to know Sarah’s still on my side.

“..Coming..”
I tightened my shoulders up and cleared my wet eyes with a swipe of my hand.
The shopping bags made it awkward but I needed to get the water away before someone thought I was crying or something stupid..

.. I hate this ice-water magic thing..

======

“How IS Bethany? I haven’t see her in years”
Sarah smiled and explained to mum how her friend Beth was doing in full detail.

I tuned out quickly when she opened with the fact that Beth had given birth to her third kid a few months ago.

Beth is a nice person, I barely know her though.
I definitely don’t want to know the gory details about how long she was in labour for or how much the kid weighed!

My head tilted to the side and I rested my forehead against the window to stare out at the wooded hills around us while they whizzed past.

..I can be a mum now..

My head jerked so hard I ended up bashing my head on the car door-frame.

In seconds I reached my hand up to cup my aching forehead but the damage was done.
A flood of other thoughts started coming in.
Thoughts I’d been keeping suppressed as best I could!

I can give birth..
I'm gonna have a period!..
Guy’s are gonna look at me in THAT way..
..If they wanted to they could..

“I felt sick..”
I virtually breathed the words out rather than saying them.

My shoulders slumped in defeat and I huddled up in my little corner of the car.
I focused on breathing to help the feeling go away and calm out the tide of facts that were assaulting my already fragile ego.

..Sarah’s still prettier than me..

THAT one made me silently growl at myself.
This isn't like me.. what the hell do I care if Sarah’s prettier than me!
Why should I care if she’s popular and famous and mum love her and I-

Water started forming in my eyes again.
My hands almost came up to slap myself for acting so stupid!

At the last second I stalled my arm before it could unwrap from around my knees and I settled for shoving my face hard into my arm to rub my eyes dry.
It would work better if I had longer sleeves but I’ll work with what I have!

======

On the drive home, sitting alone huddled up in the back seat, with the sound of mum and Sarah happily talking away.. I had a silent mini-breakdown.

My arms were shivering.
My eyes wouldn't stay dry and I couldn't stop the tremble of my lower lip.

I felt utterly pathetic.

I'm an ADULT!
I shouldn't be getting worked up like this over stupid jealousy at stupid Sarah when it doesn't even make SENSE!

What do I care if she’s popular and pretty!
What do I care if she’s famous and mum loves her so much!
What.. Why…

Why do I care..

WHY DO I CARE!

My fingers twitched a little and I ended up pinching my thigh hard through my leggings.
The pain gave me something to focus on.
It almost felt good to have something I KNOW I have control over.

It hurt, but I could stop this hurt!
Not like the rest of it..
My fingers let go and I moved my hand down a little to pinch myself again, harder.

It felt good.

The rest of the drive to mums place was a blur to me.
I was lost in my own little world of the sharp pain followed by a soothing release.

The jolt of mum’s car coming to a stop in the driveway woke me up slightly.

I sighed and went to follow them both out of the car.
They were still talking, not that I could focus enough to understand what they were going on about, but they were both smiling still..

My hand scrunched up a little and I forced my nails to dig into the palm of my hand.
It hurt, not in the same way as the pinching had, but the moment of relief and the knowledge that I was in full control of the pain felt good all the same.

When mum popped the trunk I grabbed a few bags with one hand and left the other one free to dig my nails in again.

It felt so good to be in control.
I shouldn't, but I couldn't stop it now!

..I think I have a problem..

The mind is a great and terrifying thing. Events unfold including but not limited to: Sarah not actually being present (except for a short cameo at the start) And Hannah finds more then she bargains for when she eventually manages to meditate.

“I definitely have a problem..”

It didn’t take much to get my sorely needed meditation time.
Sarah shot me a weird look when I used the excuse of being tired but mum drew her back into conversation before she could bring it up.

I’m a bit calmer now, about them at least, after the mini-freakout in the car.
Having half an hour of nothing but my thoughts for company has helped surprisingly well.
Whatever was pushing my mental buttons and making me a big depressive bundle of nerves has eased.
I’m kind of glad my element has apparently changed completely, if I was still a fire elemental I’d probably have turned mums car bright orange along with everything and everyone inside it on the ride home.

I can see why mum and Sarah seem so much closer now at least.
With the change in mums perspective and Sarah not being so tense about the elephant in the room between them, namely me as ‘Alistor’, they’re making up for lost time.

For the last few years every time they’ve met up, it’s only been a short time before one of them would mention me and the argument kicked off again.

I’m happy for Sarah, they have a lot to catch up on.
They were always close, I don’t think I even realised just HOW close before.

Knowing all that doesn’t make my problem any better though..

“Stop it”
My eyes cut down to my hand, my nails were digging down sharp enough to make my wince.

It wouldn’t stop!
My hand keeps going, if I try to pin the hand flat my other one will pinch my arm until I moved it again.

I’ve finally got time to meditate and find out what the hell is wrong with my head but I can’t focus because my hands won’t STOP!

“I don’t need this!”

My hand didn’t listen.
I hissed in a breath when my thumb caught on a particularly sore spot I’d managed to dig into my palm over the last half hour.

“Stop it”
I focused hard on my hand.
My fingers twitched but after a moment they continued digging in with my nails.

“STOP. IT!”
My hand spasmed hard and finally went limp.
For some reason my breathing was coming out a bit harshly.

“I’ve seriously got a problem..”

After a careful pause to make sure neither of my hands were going to start up on their mission to harm me again I let out a sigh of relief and closed my eyes.

Finally I can meditate in peace!
I wasted thirty minutes of perfectly good meditation time with my unreasonable emotions and uncooperative hands.

My legs pulled up into meditation pose slowly.

It still feels weird to have shorter but more flexible legs, not to mention the weirdly shaped hips and less ‘obstructed’ crotch area.
Meditation is going to be overall easier on my joints now at least but it still throws me off a little with the weirdness.

“In.. and out.. from the core find the lines, feed them and follow them to the mindscape..”
I’ve not had to vocalise the steps since the third day Edith spent teaching me how to do this but anything to help keep my focus at the moment is helpful.

It’s an odd feeling to describe, the magic flowing up from my core.
The lines..
It’s another of those things that’s easy to feel but hard to explain.

My core feels like a giant bubble somewhere near my heart.
If I give it a prod, not literally but metaphysically.. well kind of..

I said it was hard to explain!

Basically if I prod my core it tends to ripple, if I prod it hard enough a tendril of power will follow the ‘prod’ on whichever lines I lead it.
Your whole body is like a giant maze of power channels for magic, if you’re a mage.
They are commonly called ‘The Lines’ by most people.

By sending core magic along a certain set of lines you can get a certain outcome.
That’s called ‘internalised magic’.
For most people it tends to usually only be possible with the simple stuff.
The stuff you know well enough to skip some steps with so you can avoid having to vocalise the incantation, the use of hand gestures or having to dance out minor spell components in rituals.

Technically you could make any spell into purely internalised magic, with practice, but the difficulty ramps up the more steps you introduce.
You have to split your concentration with every line you use.
Maintaining more than three separate lines at once is just about the limit for most people.

My limit is usually about twelve lines.
My initial, messed up, awakening was useful for teaching me to multitask if nothing else..

Currently I wouldn’t trust myself to cast anything with more than four lines without adding vocalisation and stupid hand waving.

My bodies acting weird, mostly it’s my magic’s fault.

Normally, for a normal mage, your body in general is devoid of active magic.
The magic stays in the core and will only enter the lines if you pull it toward them.
That makes ‘seeing’ what you’re doing a lot easier.

At the moment I have so much magic in my body!.. too much..

EVERY line I can see is full to bursting.
I can’t even track the line I’m tracing from my core to my brain with my inner-eye!
I’m basically casting this meditation ritual blind, using a kind of magical muscle memory as a map.

The lines can be visualised in different ways, it’s all subjective and symbolic, like most magic sadly.
For me, I see them as little golden channels.
Honestly, they look like a very complicated computer circuit to my inner-eye, if I focus enough.

There’s probably a reason for that, I’ve never looked into the implications of what you see when you ‘look’ at your lines.

All I know is that, normally, my lines are a dull coppery gold with little to no activity on them until I start casting something.
Today..
Today, while I’m using my inner-eye to watch them in real-time, my lines are singing with power!
Every line as far as my inner-eye can see is a sparkling metallic gold, the kind of gold you see with polished high-end jewellery.

Arcing out between the lines in neon greenish-purple sparks of electric-like power is wild magic.
It’s kind of beautiful.. and terrifying.

Have you ever seen neon greenish-purple as a color?
Of course not, it’s not a thing that exists.. outside of wild magic.

It hurts your eyes to see it, most non-mages can’t see active wild magic but it still strains their eyes to look at it.
The fact that so much wild magic is INSIDE ME is what makes it terrifying!

My eyes have never been great with magic.
I don’t know why, but the lines to my eyes are some of the weakest ones within my body.
It takes a lot of fine control and a long, slow build-up before I can activate any form of vision spell.

My inner-eye is more of a mental exercise and symbolic vision, like the way my brain processes the complex spell matrix and mental interactions of my mind as the big white space that represents my mindscape.
..It’s bad that my inner-eye is hurting a little from looking at the wild magic sparking across my lines..
..It’s very bad..

There’s something REALLY wrong with me.
It’s like I’m full to bursting with magic and I have no way to vent it!
On TOP of that I’m having all these mental issues too..

The sooner I can reach my mindscape the better.

I’ve lost trace of the line again but there’s definitely a left-turn coming up.
With a mental push I managed to shove the lines power on track again.. I think..
.. This might take a while..

======

“Finally..”
The glare of my mindscapes endless white abyss never looked more inviting.

I have no idea how long it took me to get here through all the background magic.

I lost the line so many times and had to start over each time.
When this is all sorted out I’m GOING to memorise the EXACT route here, instead of just the directions.
That was-

“What the hell?”
My eyes finally cleared enough from the white rooms glare for me to see my surroundings clearly.
“You’ve got to be KIDDING me..”

From her little camping tent to my left a girl in early twentieth century clothing with Arista’s face and general dimensions shot me an annoyed look.
She gave off a huff, put her book down and walked over to me.

Her face didn’t look inviting.
From a small lectern in front of me she picked up a clipboard and started scribbling on it.

“Name, year of death, any important information or prejudices and any enemies who may become a reoccurring problem in the future?”
My mouth dropped open and I gaped at her.

She huffed again and waved a hand in my face.
“Hey, newbie! I’ve not got all day ya know.”

It struck me as weird that she was talking in such a modern manner, considering how she was dressed.
She sounded a lot like me honestly..

“HEY!”
I flinched and swung my eyes around in awe.

My mindscape.. my nice, clean, empty mindscape..

“What the HELL is going on here?!”

The Arista-lookalike, grimaced and turned away from me.
As bad as the implications could be, she’s most likely a past-incarnation who’s not under Inner-Hannah’s control somehow?
This can’t be good!

She shoved her fingers in her mouth and let out a loud whistle that hurt my ears slightly.
“WE GOT AN IGNORANT!”

From the virtual Shanty town of mixed housing and clutter in front of us there was a collective groan.
Slowly one girl made her way out from the mess of clones around her and huffed loudly.

“I didn’t let anyone else out, she can’t be a-”
Her eyes made contact with mine and she froze stiff.
“…crap”

I squinted at her hard.
Her clothes had changed again, she was in some fancy deep purple robes now.
Her voice wasn’t what I’d expected either.
When I talked to her before she’d used twin speak which is mostly hand-gestures, so I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised, but for a part of my own mind she didn’t talk much like me..

“Inner-Hannah”
She winced and rubbed the back of her head nervously.

“Boss..”
If anything, calling me that seemed to make her even more nervous.
From all around us curious heads were sticking out of little huts and houses or temporary tents.
Slowly a crowd of near identical faces came over to form a rough circle around us.

Some of the girls didn’t look very.. stable?..
One girl to my right was twitching every few seconds.

A girl to my left seemed to be absolutely devoid of confidence, despite being a clone of everyone around her she seemed so tiny and vulnerable in comparison.

Slightly to her right was another girl.
She looked kind of normal, if you ignored the almost bikini like loincloth she was wearing.. and all the little marks and bruises across her arms and legs.
My eyes focused in on her for a second.
She flinched, her lower lip started to tremble and her hands scrunched up into tight, painful looking, fists with her nails digging into her palm..

..son of a-

I swung my angry eyes back around to face Inner-Hannah.
She at least had the decency to look apologetic.

“WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE!”

A few of the girls in the circle backed away from me looking frightened.
At least two of them started muttering under their breaths sadly, as if blaming themselves for my anger.

One of them, the one right behind Inner-Hannah, looked familiar.
When my angry eyes settled on her she didn’t flinch back like the others.
If anything she stepped forward, her chin raising in challenge and her eyes daring me to call her on it.
“Anise..”
The French one!

My eyes shot around the crowd in worry.
Most of the girls blended in to the mass of people there but a few stuck out.

To my right, trying to casually leave the area before I could notice her was Lady Arista Montrose.
The Scottish one!
She’s not under control!

That must be why I had all that stupidity with the tartan skirts earlier!
She must have been projecting and influencing me..
They all must be..

“Inner-Hannah.. what the HELL have you DONE?..”
She flinched and her shoulders slumped in defeat.

“Sorry..”
It came out as barely a whisper.
If this wasn’t MY mindscape I probably wouldn’t have heard it.
Before I could really rip into her for failing so badly at the thing she was CREATED for, there was a giggle from right behind me.

The collective ring of girls took in a single, sharp breath of worry.
All of them.. except the giggler.. she just let out another giggle.

Mechanically I turned to face her, part of me already knew who it would be but I dreaded the very idea of it.

My eyes settled on her.
Her Chiton, an almost toga-like draped dress made of dyed indigo wool, was loose to a point of almost being obscene.
Her face was the same as everyone else around me, but slightly twisted with too wide dreamy eyes and a childish smirk on her face.
Her hair was pulled back, held tightly in place by a crown of sorts.
She giggled again and gave me a slow finger wave of acknowledgement.

I spun on my heels and glared at Inner-Hannah.
Sparks of magic flew between my fingers.
Ignoring the fact that such a thing should be impossible in my mindscape, it also did a very good job of conveying just how ANGRY I was.

“YOU LET THEODORA OUT!”

The crowd of past-incarnations around us scattered quickly to hide in their makeshift homes.
Theodora wandered off casually with her eyes trailing along the blank white ceiling, as if she could see something no one else could up there, I could hear her giggles taper off as she moved further away.

In mere moments it was just me and Inner-Hannah left standing next to the wooden lectern the girl from earlier got her clipboard from.

“I’m sorry..”
My anger cooled slightly at the heart-broken tone of her voice.
“I’m really sorry.. I tried.. I really really tried!”
She looked like she was moments away from breaking into tears.
“There’s too many of them! I tried to keep them all calm but some of them..”

She shook her head and cupped it in her hands as if her head hurt suddenly.

“Some of them are so dominant, they pushed the others around..”
Her face tightened and she shot me pained glare.
“I had to do SOMETHING! They were tearing each other apart, they were tearing ME apart!”
Her breaths were coming in pants and her hands fisted tightly to the side of her head.
“I didn’t have any other choice, I had to get the victims out.”

She moved an arm away from her head reluctantly and swung it out to show who she was talking about.
“A band of strong Arista’s have been terrorising the weaker ones and the only way I could think to stop them was to let the weaker ones out”
Her legs collapsed from underneath her and she sunk to her knees.
“..I’m sorry..”

I stood speechless for a moment.

I hadn’t expected so much emotion from her.
I hadn’t expected the reason she’d done this to be so.. I thought she was just being lazy!
I hadn’t thought I..
I hadn’t..
I..

Slowly I knelt down and gathered her up in my arms.
She was crying, a detached part of me could see how weird it was for me to be comforting a part of myself inside my own mind while she cried.
She needed the release though.

It’s my fault.
I sectioned off those past-incarnations to help me handle all the conflicting minds that are stuck in my head and expected a PART of my mind to be able to handle it.. when the WHOLE of my mind hadn’t been able to handle it in the first place!

“Inner-.. do you have a name?”
She stiffened in my arms and looked up at me with red rimmed eyes.

“Hannah, my names Hannah, Sarah named me.”

She seemed to sulk a little when I flinched at her reasoning.
It’s kind of hard to argue.
Technically she’s my feminine side, she got the name first.

“The others.. they call me Yaoel.. Ellie, sometimes I guess..”
My heart warmed a little at that.
I’m not that religious, mum and dad never forced us to go to church or anything so we didn’t learn much about the bible and even if we had, I’m a mage, the bibles not big on witchcraft.
I have the memories of many different women in my head though..

A lot of them come from pre-christian history.
A lot of them were from other faiths entirely in their lifetimes, but the ones that weren’t..
..Especially the ones I can now feel my deeper connection to, the ‘victims’ that are huddled all around me at this very moment..
They named her ‘Yaoel’, the French version of the English ‘Jehoel’ or the original Hebrew ‘Yahoel’.
It’s the name of an angel.
An angel charged by god with restraining the great monster Leviathan and defeating the followers of false idols.

..It works..
I should probably be worried about the implications involved but the name fits her task.
To hold back the tide of life experience I can’t and, through her own choice, save the weak from Arista’s followers inside her own head..

“Ellie..”
She smiled at me weakly, as if she was unsure how I would take the name.
“I always liked the name Ellie.. its cute.. fits you..”
Her smile brightened and she hugged me a little tighter.

I may not be a psychiatrist but there’s something to be said about self-diagnosis in this case.
My emotional problems, my lack of control, my stray thoughts, my overwhelming tide of fear and self-loathing.. this is why it happened.

If I scan my eyes around the area I can see little signs, little hints of things that have been effecting me.
Inner-.. Ellie’s obvious depression at ‘failing’ her job probably didn’t help.

All of the girls around me are setting up roots in my mindscape, making themselves comfortable in a way none of the incarnations could even attempt to do after my first awakening.

They are all affecting me in some way, and they are all damaged in some way..
Now that I know they’re here I can feel it.
Just like after my first awakening.
Only less painful, vocal or pressurised.

There can’t be more than thirty of them here, fifty at worst.
That’s only a drop in the ocean compared to what I had to handle before Inner-Hannah took the reins!

They’re not fighting me for control either.
There are moments when they will obviously, like with the Scottish one and the skirts, times when their opinions are so drastically different from mine and their strong emotions project on to me.

The big difference is that I know it can happen now, and I know WHY it can happen.
I can use that knowledge to keep calm.
To not let it all boil over into the perfect storm of emotions I reached in the car earlier..
..Where everything becomes negative and it’s all my fault..

My lips pulled back into a little smile.
She’d not done what I expected of her, but given the circumstances she did good..
I leaned forward and gave the newly-dubbed ‘Ellie’ a kiss on the forehead.

“I’m glad you saved them”
She looked up at me with wide happy eyes and nodded without words.
She didn’t need them, even if she wasn’t so choked up with tears.

The other girls, the victims that had moved into my mindscape for protection, they started carefully coming out of their temporary housing to see if the expected emotional explosion had been avoided.
I offered them a smile which seemed to calm them down a lot.

“Do you have a meeting hall or something? I need to get to know them all I guess”

Inner-.. Ellie.. That’s going to take some getting used to..
Ellie smiled at me and nodded.

With surprisingly quick movements she was standing up and dragged me by the hand through the mess of tents and mini-houses to a wide open clearing of stark white floor.
Apparently this is their meeting place.

Over the course of the next half hour the girls started coming over to see me, hesitantly at first, but as word spread that I wasn’t going to yell at them they became emboldened to some degree.

======

I smiled politely as Ellie introduced a sun-tanned past-incarnation wearing a ragged dark black robe and cowled hood.
Her name was apparently ‘Allison of York’.

According to Ellie she was a Carmelite nun stationed at the Cathedral of York Minster, England during the late fourteen-hundreds.

So far, she’s my bet for being the source of my sudden bible knowledge.
Possibly even the source of Ellie’s new name too.

No given prejudices aside from ‘The Heathens’ and no enemies who may become a problem in the future.
She seemed slightly in awe of me as I shook her hand and she scuttled away quickly to her own house, which stood out a little from the rest by its tall spire and detailed glass window.

I shared a small smile with Ellie.
She understood the feeling of contentment and closure I was getting from finally gaining a direct insight into some of the voices sharing my head-space, memories are one thing but talking to them feels a lot more personal.

Before we could speak another girl cautiously moved forward and bobbed an awkward curtsy with her burlap dress.
Behind her there was a slight queue forming.

Considering how long it’s taken for me to meet just the few brave ones so far, this could take a while..

======

“How many more do we have to go?”
Ellie looked down at her clipboard and ticked the latest name ‘Avita of the Vaccai’ from her list with a slight frowned.
Eventually she cringed and shot me an apologetic look.

I struggled to hide my smirk.
We’d bonded a little more while working our way through the ‘victims’.
I could tell that she thought I wouldn’t like whatever she had to report.

Her facial expressions remind me a lot of Sarah’s ones honestly.

That probably says something about me and where I get my idea of femininity from.
She IS my feminine side given form after all, or at least she started as that.
I’m not so sure now.
The fact that she can think her own thoughts independent of me and we’ve been mentally two separate parts of the same mind for SO long makes me wonder..

“It can’t be THAT bad?”
Her face set itself into the same ‘you poor ignorant fool’ look Sarah used to give me if I tried to hang-out with her and her friends in school.
She slowly moved the clipboard over for me to read.

It took me a moment to comprehend just how many names were on that first sheet alone.
Have we really been meeting-and-greeting so many incarnations?
On the top of the very first page were three unchecked names.

I groaned while reading each one.
I don’t know what her sorting system in this list was but I would understand if she’d sorted it by ‘most likely to be a pain in the ass’ after looking at the first page and the missing incarnations.

Ellie turned to a girl nearby.
Megan, a Welsh incarnation, relatively modern compared to the rest.
She’d looked me in the eye when we talked earlier and her posture gave off the feeling that she was usually pretty self-assured.

“Round up some of the braver girls. I need you to bring Anise, Lady M and..”
Ellie paused to look at me pleadingly.

I didn’t want to face it anymore then she did but if I don’t handle all of this now I just KNOW it will come back to bite me on the ass at the worst possible time.
My nod made her shoulders droop a little but she tried to put on a brave face for Megan.

“..and Theodora..”

Megan cringed a little.
After taking a deep breath she nodded and made her way into the shanty town that had sprung up around my mindscape.

“Is this really a good idea?”

This time I cringed.
No it probably wasn’t..
If nothing else, it will probably leave me with a headache.
I never thought I’d see the day when the bitchy French aristocrat Anise would be my favourite incarnation from ANY list.
At least I know what she’s like!

Lady Arista Montrose had, until recently, been a face in the mass of identical faces pressing down on my mind.
Pretty much a non-entity for me, harsh as that sounds.

Her actions with the tartan skirts though.. that changes things..
I need to know how she did it.
I need to know WHY she did it.
Most importantly, I need to either have her word to never do that to me again or find some way to stop her next time!

In comparison, Theodora is both the worst incarnation I could ever have to face and yet probably my easiest to handle.
She tends to live in her own world.
The conversation will hopefully be brief at least.

I can’t stay in my own mind forever, mums bound to come and check on me eventually.
Can you imagine the mess that will kick off if she tries to wake me up and I’m still in here?

======

Ellie stood beside me, her fingers tapping on her clipboard in impatience.
It’s been roughly ten minutes and we’ve not heard much activity from the mental shanty town around us.

A thought occurred to me, while I rocked on my heels and stared out at the strange mix of housing styles around us.
Why are the troublesome three even here?

Ellie said she let out the ‘victims’, the incarnations that were being terrorised by the original Arista and her group of followers.
The reason I know so much about those three in particular is a mix of their strong personalities and their power.
Not typically what you would consider ‘victim’ material.

“Why are those three here?”
Ellie looked confused for a moment until her face dropped into a frown when she realised what I meant.

“Arista, the original Arista, she has it out for them in particular. That’s what started all of this off.”
She winced and rubbed her free hand against her head a little.
“Theodora made a prediction. ‘The works of the daughter will dwarf that of the mother’ something like that, I dunno, she barely makes sense when she’s lucid let alone when she’s doing her mystic from Delphi impersonation..”

I frowned at her.
“You don’t believe in it?”

She shot me a confused look.
“You do?”
I shrugged and considered the idea for a moment.

I don’t really believe in the mystic stuff.

Yeah, I’m a mage, I get that the idea of me not believing in something when I can literally do magic is a bit weird but everyone has their limits.
Fena believes in that kinda thing though.

She tried to show me how to use different mediums to get limited future-sight but it was a complete failure.
I understood the theory but I never managed to get anything out of it all.

Edith said I don’t have what it takes to be a mystic.
Well.. no.. what she actually said was more along the lines of:
‘Ya be full girl, be havin’ the touch f’sure. No stomach to ya! Ya ain’ be havin’ the ‘art till ya have th’a stomach! Bad Juju be cloudin’ ya eye. Come, we be workin’ ya lines t’day’

I mentally translated that as her saying that I’m not mystic material.
Reluctantly Fena agreed with me when I brought it up later.

Personal feelings aside, Fena IS pretty good at future-sight.
There must be SOMETHING to it all.
That doesn’t mean I have to like the idea of it.
Being able to predict the future falls a bit too close to ‘destiny’ and ‘unchangeable fate’ territory for my liking.
Fena tried to tell me it wasn’t like that but she struggled to explain why it wasn’t.

Magic DOES tend to be like that at times.
If you can’t feel it personally then words just aren’t enough to explain it properly.

=======

My eyes batted a few times and I focused back on Ellie.
She looked a bit offended.

“Did you just blank me?”
I frowned and waved my hand for her to explain.

“You did that whole ‘getting lost in thoughts’ thing you keep doing in the real world”

Oh.. well that’s not good..

“Something’s seriously wrong with you, don’t think I didn’t notice the magic flashing through your fingers in here earlier, that’s not normal either..”
I sighed and slumped my shoulders a little.

“I know, there’s so much going wrong at the moment I’m having trouble keeping track of it all honestly.”

Ellie gave me an awkward, apologetic look and wrapped me in a loose hug.
She definitely reminds me of Sarah sometimes.
I feel a bit warm and happy knowing that my subconscious made Sarah into my feminine role-model.

She can frustrate me so much at times, but she’s my sister, she’s GOING to do that.
Just because she can be annoying doesn’t mean I can’t see that she’s a good girl..
..Well, a good girl in the sense that she’s good at being one at least..

I’m pretty sure she would laugh at me if I called her a ‘good girl’ to her face, she spent most of her teen years trying to break out of that ‘all-american nice girl’ mold.

“You’re doing it again!”
Ellie squeezed me a little tighter and gave me Sarah’s award winning pout.
“Seriously, you need to go see a shrink. What if this is infectious? I don’t WANT to spend the rest of MY life spacing out every five minutes!”

I leaned away from her a little and stared aghast.
“You’re ME. If there’s something wrong with me, it’s wrong with you too already!”

She held her worried pout for a few more seconds before dissolving into giggles.

“I know, I know, that doesn’t mean I’m not right though.”
I shrugged a little and we broke our hug with a smile.

“You don’t need to worry too much about a shrink, if the storyteller guy has anything to do with it then I’m gonna be in therapy pretty soon.. as much help as THAT’s gonna be.”
She looked momentarily confused but after a second to focus she got my memory of him and nodded in understanding with a mild wince.

The storyteller guy was such an ASS!
If I’m actually put into therapy by the Hub then my mouth is staying sealed shut now.
What’s the point of having someone to talk to about anything if they are reporting to your enemy?!

I opened my mouth to ask if Ellie had any ideas from her ‘tenants’ about things I could do if the situation does end up going that far with the shrink but shut it without a word passing my lips when a commotion started approaching us from the left.

We both shared a nervous look and turned to face the noise.

A mass of clone-like girls came towards us, visible like a wave through the houses.
Above them, struggling hard and spouting off a lot of rather offensive words in French was another Arista-lookalike.

I let out a breath of relief when her yells increased and they came nearer.
At least it’s not Theodora..

======

She glared at me.
I glared back.
We both seemed perfectly happy with keeping the conversation at that level.

She was the one to finally crack.
Her mouth pulled into a tight lipped smile and she flipped her hair arrogantly.

“You are st’eel ze awkward sissy-boy non?”
My glare went up a level or two.
She smirked a little in victory.

“Still the self-entitled shrew whose father couldn’t even bribe the blacksmiths son to marry her?”
Her smirk slipped and she went back to glaring at me.
Score one for me.

It helps that I have an inside track on her life while she just has what she’s seen of me since my awakening to work from.
If I REALLY wanted to go for the throat, I’d bring up the fact that the foppish man she fell head over heels for in her teens turned out to not only be secretly gay but also considered her ‘a creepy stalker who couldn’t take the hint that she was beneath him both socially, mentally and physically’..
..yeah.. French people can be brutal..

“Can you two try talking instead of lashing out at each other, for once?”
I shot Ellie a hurt look but she wasn’t buying it.

“She started it..”
Ellie glared at me.
Even I could tell it was a childish defence but she DID start it.
I’M the nice one here!

“Why should I listen to ‘im? ’e is not a lady worthy of us. ‘e pollutes our noble line, c’est tres tragique!”
She sniffed and stuck her nose up at me.

…bitch..

“Bitch”
Her eyes flashed.
“Fils de bast!”
My eyes tightened.
“Whore!”
She smirked.
“Fil a putain!”

..you little..
No-one insults my mum like that!

“At least my father didn’t constantly wish he’d drowned me at birth!”
She jolted away from me as if I’d hit her.
Slowly tears came to her eyes and she took in a gasping breath of pain.

Maybe I went too far?

She just sets me off!
Looking around, at the crowd of other incarnations around us, they all looked a bit smug.
She hadn’t made many friends in here with her attitude.

It took me a moment to realise I wasn’t sorry for that, I felt smug too.
..why do I feel smug?

I shouldn’t feel smug for hurting someone.. that’s not me..

Anise growled low in her throat and surged towards me.
A few of the others managed to get a hold on her before she reached me but she smirked through streaming eyes.

“Yours did not wish you dead but ‘e DID run from you, you freakish un-loveable monster!”
My face turned red with anger.
Around me many of the girls had similar looks of rage on their faces.

This is why you shouldn’t fight with yourself, you know JUST how to hurt yourself the most!

My rage took a dark turn.
I wanted to hurt her.
I wanted her to fear me.
I wanted.. I.. wanted..

I DON’T!
Why am I..

DAMN IT!
I cut my eyes around at the near mob of identical looking girls around me.

They all had similar looks on their faces.
She’d insulted me, and in turn insulted them.
THEY wanted to hurt her.
THEY wanted her to fear them.
They..

“EVERYONE STOP!”

Every incarnation in my mindscape came to a standstill.
My hands came up and I pressed hard into the side of my head.
The pressure helped me focus.

This wasn’t me.
This isn’t me.
I don’t treat people like this!
..no matter how much they are asking for it..

“I get that you’re all angry with her but we have to stop!”

Anise stared at me with her mouth open in shock.
Ellie looked relieved for some reason.
Everyone else watched me with obvious confusion.

“Let her go..”
The girls holding Anise reluctantly shared a look and stepped away from her slowly.

She sunk to her knees but didn’t move her awed eyes from mine.

“This.. this collective anger is messing with my head!.. We can’t fight like this!”
A few faces sunk in realisation but a lot of the mob didn’t seem to understand.
“Your here because you had to flee from Arista.. I’m NOT Arista!.. and neither are you..”
A few more faces sunk.
Comparing them to their most recent bully worked better than just stating facts.

“You come here and make yourselves at home in my head.. of course that has consequences..”
Ellie hugged herself a little and gave me a look of pity.

“You’re all a part of me now, YOU decided that when YOU started building this”
My hand waved out at the shanty town they had built.
“What I feel, you feel.. and what you feel, I feel..”

THERE’S the realisation moment I’d been looking for.
With a single gasp of breath all the incarnations realised just how bad our situation could be.

“I’m out of control lately but I’ve just realised why..”

My legs felt stiff, with a bit of force I managed my first step forward.
“.. I’m not just me anymore.. WE are US.”
I waved my arms wide to them and took another step.

“This isn’t like last time, you’re not all parts of Arista taking up space in my head.”
My pace stalled a little but I managed the next step anyway.
“You’re in my head without her.. you’re mine now.. and I’m yours.”

Another step, I was close.

“We can’t fight.. if we fight we will tear each other apart!.. I can’t do this alone..”
One last step and I was within reach of Anise.

“You can dislike each other, you can disagree with my actions.. but if you have a problem we have to DISCUSS it.. you can’t just push your thoughts and feelings on to me.. if you all give me so many mixed inputs at once I might do something we will all regret.”

Anise looked up at me.
She seemed a bit ashamed of herself.
I gave her a tentative smile and opened my arms in invitation.
She hesitated for a heartbeat but eventually she pushed herself up and hugged me back.

I could feel a swell of sappy, happy feelings in my chest.
Judging from the faces I could see, while some of the feelings may actually be mine, most of feelings are probably coming from the other incarnations.
I couldn’t shake the feeling that the way we had gone from fighting to hugging seemed in some way ‘cute’.

My eyes caught on Ellie.
She looked proud but also a bit smug.
If anyone’s the source of the ‘cute’ thought it would be her.
I know it probably counts as an insult to myself, but there’s something not right in her head..

Anise coughed awkwardly to get my attention.
“You can let go now..”
I smirked and hugged her a little tighter for a second before dropping the hug.
She shot me an annoyed look but there was no actual heat in it.

One of the girls from the crowd, Josette I think, she stepped forward to get everyone’s attention.
“How are we going to make this work?”

I sighed and let my shoulders slump a little.
They were all looking to me for guidance now.

Why did I have to open my big mouth and make a speech?..

“Okay..”
What could work?
What would be fair without getting in the way?
I could..
..we could..
..yeah..

“Okay, how about this.. set up a council of representatives, six girls at most.”
That idea got me some confused looks, it took me a moment to realise some of these girls were born before democracy was invented.
“Ellie will be the leader with the tie-breaking vote. Anything that isn’t life or death can be settled by the council, I’ll make an effort to meditate when I can so Ellie can keep me up to date and we can avoid any big blow up’s like we’ve had recently.”
Most of the girls around me nodded in understanding.

“It won’t be perfect. I’ll warn you now that this is MY life, I’m keeping the choice to veto over you if I feel strongly enough on something, but I promise to not abuse that option.”
A few more nodded in acceptance.
“Anyone who tries to go around the council will have to be punished in some way..”

Before I could voice anything else on that front someone pushed her way from out of the crowd and knelt at my feet, her long court dress spread out around her as she bowed her head.
“I wish to offer my deepest regrets for having abused your trust in such a disgraceful manner”

I smiled a little in bemusement but lifted her chin to look at her properly.
Lady Arista Montrose wouldn’t meet my eyes.

“You don’t have to apologise. I can understand your aversion to the Queen’s colors.”
She didn’t seem reassured by my words.
If anything, she looked worse now.

“You have shown yourself to be a wise and just ruler. I humbly request leniency in your punishment.”

I frowned at her slightly.
I only came up with this whole council thing a minute ago, she can’t seriously think I would punish her for something she couldn’t have known she was doing at the time, can she?

Before I could open my mouth to dismiss her demand out of hand Ellie coughed hard.
My eyes cut to her and she shared a meaningful look with me.
Her hand carefully twitched in a pattern I didn’t instantly recognise.
It was twin-speak, obviously, but not the normal short phrases.
She was spelling out a sentence.
‘..Don’t.. say.. it.. they.. need.. you.. to.. show.. your.. power.. or.. else..’

Oh..
…OHHHhh…
Uh.. okay.. I guess?

I hadn’t really thought properly about this whole punishment thing.
It was more of an idle threat.
Ellie’s right, I need to give them proof that I can back up my words.

What the hell kind of punishment could I give her for making me change some skirts because she didn’t like the color?..

It’s not exactly a deep, truly evil, crime!
I mean, yeah, it was awkward and frustrating.. and it’s probably stuck me with a stupid school uniform-

My mouth pulled into a sharp smirk.

A few of the girls shifted uncomfortably.
Lady Montrose cringed in expectation.

Playing the role she put me into for all it was worth I straightened my back regally and rose my hand to slowly place it on her forehead.

“Lady Arista Montrose, you are found guilty of violating the Pact of Hannah, set forth to bring peace to our broken mind”
The whole mindscape had gone deathly silent.
Everyone was hanging on my every word.
“As punishment, I decree that from this day forth, you shall wear the uniform you have bestowed upon me with your careless actions.”

With a forceful shove of magic into my mindscape I took the image of her, current very regal looking medieval gown, and shifted it.
It took a lot of control to hold back the urge to smile when I was finished.

She gaped at me in stunned shock.
From her black mary jane shoes to her pleated blue/green tartan skirt, her puffy white blouse with a cream colored sweater-vest topped off by a matching tartan neck-bow she looked so adorably confused.

I’m not sure where the extra items came from.

The more I look at her the more I’m convinced she’s wearing more of a stereotypical ‘schoolgirl’ outfit then even I intended to give her.
Her hair is tied back in a loose ponytail now with a tartan scrunchie!
..I definitely didn’t think of that one..

It hurts to say that I like the way the sweater-vest looks..
I might have to see if I can get one if I don’t manage to dodge out of mum’s school uniform idea.

The neck-bow is a bit too much cuteness though.
Even I have my limits.

Lady Montrose looked down at herself and let out an indignant squeak that sounded a lot like the one I made in the parking lot earlier.
In one motion she went from gaping at her bare thighs to slamming her hands down to try and tug the, technically, knee-length skirt low enough that it could meet her knee-high socks.

The crowd around us broke out into chaos.
I’d forgotten in my amusement that the past-incarnations around me were just that, PAST-incarnations.
A skirt that ended at the knee offended a fair few of them much more then I’d anticipated!
At least the romans looked amused.

“QUIET!”
They all fell still and watched me cautiously.
I rose my hands in a sign of peace and tried to come up with some form of damage control before they all start panicking about indecency again.

From the back of the crowd one girl started giggling.
It wasn’t a pleasant giggle.
It came out broken and just a little detached as if she didn’t really understand why she was laughing.

I wasn’t the only one who cringed.
“Theodora”

The girls parted out of her way and brought her into view.
The shoulders of her Chiton dress have slid down a bit further on either side since I last saw her.
It’s kind of lucky that we all have the same body shape as the original Arista, if her boobs were a little bigger she would be just plain flaunting herself at this point.

She stopped giggling at last and with a slight skip in her step she invaded my personal space.
Carelessly she flipped Lady M’s new ponytail with her hand and snorted in amusement.

She fixed her wide dreamy eyes on me and snapped herself into a cadet worthy salute with clicking heels and everything.
“Boss..”
She sounded amused at calling me that title.

I watched her for a moment and decided to just run with my instincts, it’s worked out pretty well since I came in here at least.
“Dora..”

Her face lit up in joy.

“You’re fun! Much better then Mother Arista.”
She stepped even closer to me and ended up leaning her full body weight onto me.

Her cheek rubbed happily against mine and she almost purred for some reason.

For a moment I froze in surprise.
Sarah used to use that same affectionate type of cheek rubbing when we were kids.
Back before the other kids made fun of her for it and she stopped.

When her cheek stroked against mine on a second pass Dora whispered in my ear.
“I can see why she fears you”
I blinked a few times to process that and ended up flinching away from her.

It stunned me a little that she actually took the hint and leaned away.
Seemingly without a care, she rolled her whole body away from me and lazily stalked out in a wide circle to catch the eye of all the girls around us.
I tracked her path and felt a bit put off that I recognised her walk.

I recognise most of her mannerisms actually.

She has Sarah’s strut, her arms flutter in the same way I’d been taught to do when I wanted attention fixed on me and every once in a while she would pause for a moment in a perfect ‘sexy pose’ that I could do with my eyes closed.
Sarah taught me a LOT of those poses when I had to do her modelling shoot for her.

She reached nearly the half way mark in her circle parade around me and she suddenly stopped.
Her arms went limp at her side, her legs stumbled a little and she stared off into thin air with a blank look.

My stomach rumbled.
I tried to ignore it but it progressed to a gut deep feeling that something was vaguely wrong.
Just when I was really starting to worry it eased off.

With a deep gasp of air Theodora surged back to the ‘real world’ and almost fell forward in relief.
Her eyes seemed less glazed now.
She shakily pushed herself back to her feet properly and locked eyes on me.

I froze under her intense gaze.
She worked her way over to me, some people went to protest but she waved them off carelessly.
It looked like she wanted to cry.

Slowly she cupped my head in her hand, pulling it to her chest.
Her mouth settled over my ear and I shivered a little as her breath caressed it slightly.

“You are so young.”
Her lip brushed against my earlobe which elicited another uncomfortable shiver from me.
“..So very young.. young and naive.. and they will DESTROY you for it”

I tried to jerk away from her but she held my head tightly in place.

“Your Max, my John.. no, that’s not right.. MY Max.. Your John.. He will love you like no other, but do not trust him.. not even for a single moment should you trust him..”
My attempts to pull away from her became a bit more frantic.

I could feel a few pairs of hands coming around us to try and free me from her grasp.

“Your other half will hurt you, she will cause you more pain than you have ever experienced.. It’s Sarah’s right to do so, a heart of a heart”
Her free hand gently stroked my cheek and she sighed deeply.

“You won’t listen. You never listen..”
She squeezed my head slightly harder in her surprisingly strong arms.
“Someday little Alice, someday you will see just how far the rabbit hole goes and you will remember my words with such regret..”
Without a moment’s notice she tossed me away from her and let off a piercing giggle.

There were a few gasps and some of the girls joined me on the floor with assorted uncomfortable grunts.

By the time I’d gotten myself back together from the fall she was gone.
Some of the girls in the outer ring were looking off to my left but I couldn’t see Theodora from here and none of them seemed willing to go after her.

“Are you okay?”
I looked up at Ellie.
She had her arm out to offer me a hand up which I took gratefully.
She seemed nervous.

“What did she say?”

I frowned and hesitated for a moment.
She said a lot of things.
Arista fears me?.. why?..
Sarah is gonna hurt me?.. She’d never do that..

About the only part of it I can really agree with is Max.
Of course I’d never trust Max.
I’m not stupid!

“She was spouting off a lot of stuff. Not much of it made sense.”
Ellie’s eyes seemed unusually focused.
“Anything important?”
I shrugged helplessly to her.
It’s Theodora.
She’s insane.
Even if she believes she’s some kind of mystic you can’t do magic in your mindscape..
You especially can’t do magic in someone-else’s mindscape!

Fena didn’t do any of the weird stuff that Theodora just did when she used her future-sight.
Hell, Theodora didn’t even have some kind of focus medium!
..The whole thing’s suspicious..

“Nothing important really, she’s crazy”
Ellie let out a relieved sigh and smiled at me.
“You know if she’s crazy and she’s in here, then that must make you a bit crazy too right?”
I smiled back at her.
My nerves eased a bit at her laughing eyes.

“I think I’ll survive being one-fiftieth crazy. I’m a mage, we’re all a little bit not-normal.”
Ellie slung her arm around my shoulders and grinned.
“That’s assuming the rest of us aren’t crazy too, you must be a pretty awesome mage, we’re about as not-normal as you can get!”
We both laughed a little.

The girls around us seemed to be calming down from Theodora’s dramatics.
A few of them were already talking about it all, the general consensus seemed to be that she was crazy, that being the normal opinion with Theodora.

I just had to jinx it earlier by assuming she would be the easy one to handle didn’t I?

I smiled while some of the girls came over to talk with me and Ellie.
For some reason her predictions had shaken me a little still.
My gut instinct says she wasn’t lying, she could still be wrong but she seemed so certain about what she was saying..

“Do I really have to keep wearing this?”
I jolted a little from my thoughts and smirked at Lady M.
Her voice had lost a lot of her previous stiff and regal tone, if anything, the question almost seemed to be more of a whine than anything else.

If I look like she does in the ‘school uniform’ mum’s blatantly been trying to get me to wear for my ‘advanced tuition’ then I can kinda understand why mum would do it..

Even while she’s flustered and grumpy she still looks adorable in it!

“You’re the one who begged for punishment, I was gonna let you go with a warning”
Her jaw dropped and she flushed to the tips of her ears.
“Seriously?”
I barely held back a laugh.

She scrunched up her nose in annoyance.
The expression did nothing to make her look less adorable.

“These.. clothes.. are embarrassing. I’m an elder of-”
Before she could build up a head of steam with her titles Ellie cut in and slung her arm over her shoulders to hug her warmly.
“Welcome to the twenty-first century. The skirts are short, the food is fast and the morals are questionable”
She shot a look over at me and grinned.
“and we wouldn’t have it any other way.”
I grinned back.

Scanning my eyes around the crowd of past-incarnations I couldn’t help but feel a bit warm and happy.

They were weird.
They were most likely going to get annoying eventually.
They were a work in progress.. but they are mine too.

Obviously they are having an effect on me, that’s to be expected with awakenings.
They AREN’T trying to take over me though, that’s important.

One of the biggest reasons I fought so hard against my first awakening and tried every trick in the book to keep myself completely separate from it all when possible was the fear that Arista would just come in and take over.
That I wouldn’t be ME anymore.

These girls though..
I can see so much of ‘me’ in them.. and so much of them in me.
Little things.
Little but important things.

To my right a group of four girls in similar roman style clothing were huddled up chatting.

The roman girls have long or awkward names in general, I struggled to remember them at first.
I know the one with her back to me goes by ‘Dexi’ these days.
For all of her bluster and self-assurance, I could see as she talked excitedly with the others that she waved her hands in the same way I do.
The girl to her left, ‘Lexi’, smiled my smile and flicked her hair in a way that I used to think was unique to me and Sarah.

These girls aren’t some invading force coming to take away who I am.
They are me.
A bit different at times sure, but still me.

The last few days of instability and confusion have been anything but fun.
I don’t think I would change them now though?

If I did, then I wouldn’t be standing here in my mindscape right now feeling so content.
I’m not worried anymore.

They know me as a person now and I know them as individuals too.
A lot of the fear on both sides has been mitigated by our simple introductions.

I know this is just the tip of the iceberg.
I know that without Ellie, without her hard work to keep the thousands upon thousands of other incarnations under control, I would have never had this chance to become comfortable with them at all..
My eyes drifted over to Ellie again.

Ellie suits her better then ‘Inner-Hannah’.
She’s still thinks of herself as Hannah but if she won’t hold it against us for calling her a different name, I won’t hold it against her for wanting to keep that name for her own.
It’s got sentimental value to her.

It should have, it does for me too.
Sarah gave us that name..

“Boss, ya got an opinion on this?”
My head jerked back to the girls talking with Ellie.
They all gave me the exact same smug, superior look.

Is that what I look like when I’m amused?.. I’ll have to work on that one.
It’s kinda annoying.

“Sorry I was-”
They all giggled and I could feel my cheeks flush a little.
It’s not fun to have yourselves laugh at yourself..

..awakenings really ARE bad for pronouns aren’t they?..

Ellie gave me a warm smile and waved the others to stop laughing.
“We get it, of all of us, you’re the one who has the best reason to space out once in a while.”

They all nodded, the other girls looking a bit solemn about it now.

The first girl to speak perked up again quickly and bounced excitedly on her heels.
“So what I was asking was, what you thought about the council makeup? How should we sort out a good representative for all the girls with such a small sample group?”

She stumped me on that one.

I have no idea.
How do they sort this thing out in modern councils?
I’ve never really gone too deep into politics, let alone how government works.

With the amount of time I’ve had to spend out of the country in the last few years, on missions, I’ve barely been able to keep track of who the president is honestly..

My mouth opened to tell her exactly that when my shoulder started wildly shaking without any input from me.
It stopped after a moment and I could just faintly hear someone’s voice calling me.

Ellie shot me an understanding look and waved me away with a hand flick that said she would handle things from here.
I let out a relieved sigh and nodded thanks to her.

With a mental push I broke my connection to my mindscape and came back to the real world.

======

The first thing I saw upon opening my eyes was mum.
She looked a little flustered but calmed down quickly when she saw me looking back at her.

“Oh thank god. I was really getting worried there, are you feeling okay? I tried to wake you up but you wouldn’t respond at first. If you hadn’t twitched and groaned when I shook you we’d be half-way to the hospital by now.”

I smiled at her awkwardly and shrugged.
I can’t lie to her about my feelings.
..stupid brand..

She wouldn’t accept ‘I’m fine’ as an answer anyway.
She never did from Sarah when we were kids.

“I’m a heavy sleeper, shopping really wore me out too.”
Mum looked at me a bit suspiciously.

“That must have been some kind of dream..”
My eyebrow popped up with an unasked question.
“You’re clammy and it looks like you’ve really hurt your hands in your sleep”

I followed her eyes down to my open palm with its deep, sore looking self-inflicted nail marks.
..damn it..

A general pat down of my shirt showed that I wasn’t just ‘clammy’.. I was wet.
My back especially.
.. stupid ice to water thing..

I only just managed to remember mum was watching me before I mentally sunk into trying to work out how to fix the stupid ice thing.
It’s REALLY getting on my nerves.
As casually as I could, I slipped my face into an awkward smile for mum.

“Yeah, it was a pretty bad nightmare”
She nodded and gave me a strained smile back.
“..Do you want to talk about it?”

NO! I don’t want to talk about it, it’s not actually a real thing!
Why did I ever want her to pay attention to me before?

She never would have been this observant with Alistor!

“It’s over now, I’m-”
My brand gave me a warning twitch.
“-I just want a shower, ya know? Being all sweaty is gross..”

Mum didn’t seem to pick up on my slight pause.
She nodded knowingly and waved me towards my new room’s en-suite bathroom instead.

“I was just going to go put the chicken in. It’s a lovely night out, do you fancy a chicken salad on the balcony?”
I smiled a little.

Mum used to make us chicken salads a lot in the summer as kids.
Dad said it was because she couldn’t be bothered to cook a lot in the heat but I think she just enjoyed eating fresh food on the balcony.
I liked it too back then, it’s been so long..

My lips pulled into a wider smile and I nodded happily.

Mum smiled back at me and ruffled my hair a little.
It felt really nice to have her do that.
She always did it to Sarah when we were kids but the only times she did it with me was when she thought I was Sarah.

My smile soured a little at that thought but luckily mum had already turned away from me to walk downstairs.
With a barely audible sigh I got out of bed and cast a quick drying spell on my bedding.
..stupid Ice-water thing..

“Yay, a shower.. Just what I need, an excuse to see myself naked..”
I frowned a little but quickly shook my head to clear the dark mood before it settled in properly.

I should be happy.
My head feels a lot clearer than it has in ages.
I can feel some contentment coming from inside me that is definitely not directly ‘mine’.
I can also feel a lot of contentment inside me that definitely IS mine as well.

Peace in my mindscape.
Mum’s happy with me.
Fresh salad on the balcony.
Sarah’s probably off somewhere having fun with Tor.

I should enjoy it while it lasts.
I have nothing to be unhappy about at the moment.

My eyes cut over to the bathroom.
My minds-eye flashed with an image of water dripping down my curvy new body, washing soap-suds over parts of me that have only recently become a lot more sensitive than they were before.

My cheeks flared a little in embarrassment with just a touch of something else.
.. It’s okay if I blame those thoughts on Theodora, right?..
She’s an insane pervert, she’d happily take the credit for them.

Maybe I do have some reasons to be a bit put-off about things still, but I wouldn’t go so far as to say that I’m ‘unhappy’ with things as they are.
Maybe it’s just the contented feelings that are making me feel all warm and fuzzy talking but..
Who cares?
I’ll just enjoy it for now.

Well.. once I get the shower out the way at least.

“Let’s just get it over with”
Despite my grumble, my cheeks refused to stop glowing.

This new body is going to take some getting used to.
It’s only been a few days, I’m amazed I’m handling it as well as I am so far.
..Let’s not kid ourselves..
The two-thousand years, plus or minus a few centuries, of experience with this exact body in the form of past-life memories that I have comfortably settled in my brain at the moment probably help a lot too.

“Stop stalling”
I nodded to myself forcefully and faced my newest enemy.
Today I shall defeat the great and evil shower monster, then celebrate with a salad!

.. I'm such a dork sometimes..

Coming home can mean a lot of things, some of them are frustrating. Events unfold including but not limited to: Sarah not actually being present AGAIN (no exceptions this time, she's just being lazy) And Hannah faces her rematch with the shower monster by thinking tactically.

I survived my war on the shower monster victorious!.. just about..

Then I topped it off by having a really nice salad dinner on the balcony with mum and we settled on the sofas to watch some garbage TV shows.

The first sign of trouble came when we turned off the TV and went upstairs.
I went up to my new room quickly to get ready for bed but when I came out of the bathroom mum was sitting on it with a bundle of pink in one hand and a warm smile on her face.

That smile looked almost innocent at first.

“We got you a new nighty at the store Ari”
Her wave of the pink bundle made me freeze for a moment.

“It’s okay mum, I normally sleep naked honestly”
I always have.

She used to make me wear shorts to bed as a kid but I moved out over eight years ago!

Even though I shared a flat with Sarah for a while we both aren’t exactly big on body shame around each other, if anything I wore my pyjama’s to breakfast for comfort rather than shame.
My pyjamas are REALLY comfortable for lazing around in on a day off.
I’ll have to get Sarah to drop them around soon, they will be a bit big on me now but that’s okay, they’re pyjamas after all.

When I looked back up at her, Mum’s face was pretty red for some reason.

“No daughter of mine is going to be so indecent under my roof”
For a moment I went to argue but cut myself off at the last second.

I’ve just managed to get peace between us.
Do I really want to stir up trouble now?
We had a really nice night so far, I can pick my battles..

“Sure mum, thanks.”
She gave me another warm smile and passed the nighty over to me.

It was very… pink.
Pink, and fluffy and.. it’s not TOO bad..?

..Who am I kidding?..

It’s a monstrosity!
It looks like something you would dress a very tall, three year old in!

“Thanks mum”
My cheek twitched with the effort of maintaining my smile.

My brand apparently considers saying ‘thanks’ for the monstrosity as ‘lying about my feelings’ judging by the slight twinge of warning pain I got for saying that.

Mum smiled, ruffled my hair a little and made her way out of the room to go to bed herself.

I feel kind of dirty for caving so easily.
It’s like all she has to do is rub my head and I’ll let her do whatever she wants now.
She’s treating me like an obedient puppy!

“I just know Sarah had something to do with this..”
I’ll get revenge on her someday.
She’s enjoying this whole ‘me being female’ and ‘me being younger’ stuff far too much to not get some kind of retribution!

I sighed loudly and fluffed the monstrosity out.

It would hang down to my knees.
The ruffles and the lace are going to be annoying.
I don’t know what material it is but if it didn’t have several layers to it, it would probably be a bit too see-through to be considered ‘clothing’.
My fingers found the shoulder straps from the bundle and I could finally shake it out properly.

..Is peace really worth it?..

I could totally go for all-out cold war between us again..
At least I wouldn’t have to put this.. thing.. on.

“Come on, just do it. Putting on something this ‘girly’ isn’t going to kill you, it’s not like it’s the first time you’ve had to wear something this bad, there was that swimsuit with the little modesty skirt that Sarah got you into after all..”
My pep-talk trailed off as I focused on the swimsuit incident for a moment.

I never got Sarah back for that one either!

She’s going to PAY for this.
I’ll put hair remover in her shampoo!
I’ll call Tor and beg him for sex in her voice from her landline phone!
I’ll order fifty pizza’s to her flat online and pay using her credit card!
I’ll.. I’ll..

“I’ll do nothing”

My shoulders slumped and I dropped my towel to put the nighty/monstrosity on instead.
“I always do nothing..”
Feeling a bit defeated I slipped under the covers and tried to get comfortable in the new bed, with new sheets, in a new room, with a new body and a new stupid nighty.

“The day was going so well too..”
I rolled over to face the window and sighed again.

At least my heads a bit clearer.
I still have that to add to my plus column..

“Tomorrow better be good or else..”
I knew it was an empty threat to no-one, but it felt nice to pretend for a second.

“..This sucks..”

=======

“Rise and shine!”
I almost jumped out my skin in fright.

Instantly I could feel a wet spot forming underneath me.
For one heart-stopping moment I thought I’d actually wet the bed, then my brain caught up with reality and I growled.
..STUPID ICE MAGIC!..

“Don’t growl at me Ari, you can’t waste the day away sleeping.”
My head swung up to look at mum.

She had her hands on her hips authoritatively but it was kind of undermined by the flowery scarf she had tied in her hair like a bandana.
“Come on, UP. We’ve got a lot of housework to do today, the Martials are coming around later for dinner.”
I groaned and flung myself back down onto the bed.

“Oh, don’t be like that. You like the Martials..”
I couldn’t dispute that fact, the Martials have been our neighbours as long as I can remember, their practically family at this point.

When dad left Mr Martial took over all the heavy lifting and garden work for us until mum could get herself back together.
Mrs Martial is practically mums best friend, they have tea and coffee mornings whenever they’re both off work.. well they used to at least, no idea if they still do now.

The only bad thing I can associate with the Martials is that they didn’t have any kids that me and Sarah could hang out with when we were younger.
I get the vague feeling that there’s a reason they haven’t got kids, or maybe ‘can’t have’ might be more appropriate.
We don’t talk about it obviously, but that’s just the impression I got when I was younger.

“.. Their nephew is visiting for the summer.. he’s very cute. You never know what could happen if you dress nice?..”
My mouth dropped open with shock.
Her voice was teasing but she seemed genuinely hopeful that I would hit it off with the Martials new nephew.

I didn’t even know they had other family?
They never seem to visit at least..

“Maybe you can take some of my borrowed cookbooks back over to Lily later and ‘accidentally’ introduce yourself?”
She gave my unmoving shoulder a nudge and winked deviously.

“I don-”
I cut myself off with a heaving breath.

I DON’T NEED HELP GETTING A DATE!

I especially don’t need one NOW of all times!
What the hell is wrong with her?!

“Oh come ON Ari, you’ve shut yourself up in this house since you got here. The only time you leave is when Sarah turns up”
My throat bobbed awkwardly.
Obviously her new ‘life story’ includes a whole backstory of my actions since I got here too.

..This could be bad..

“I understand that your hurting..”
My head shot up to look at her with wide eyes.
She can’t POSSIBLY know, can she?

“Your father is an ass, turning up out of the blue and leaving you here with barely the clothes on your back like that..”
She leaned forward and took my hands in hers.
“Not all men are like your father though sweetie.. you don’t have to hide from boys just because of him, I was your age once, I know you must have noticed them by now”
She squeezed my hands a little and gave me a really warm smile.

I squinted my eyes down tight and groaned.
I think I’m getting a headache..

This new life story is so convoluted!
I’m apparently mums long-lost, tomboy, teenaged daughter who has daddy issues to such a bad degree I’ve become a social pariah who’s afraid of men in some major way..

At least it’s an excuse for why the neighbours haven’t seen me around.. I guess?
Who knew mum had such an active imagination.. and why did I have to find out about it now!?

“Give him a chance Ari. He seemed very charming when I met him, you could do a lot worse than him”
Her superior smile is getting on my nerves!

“With Sarah virtually married to Tor at this point, don’t you feel even slightly jealous?”
I choked on my tongue for a moment.
Mum seemed to take the sound as my attempt at a denial of being jealous from the look on her face.
In truth, I was feeling a bit punch-drunk.

She thinks Sarah and Tor are practically married..
She thinks I’m a lost cause in desperate need of some maternal matchmaking..
She..
She..
SHE READS TOO MANY ROMANCE NOVELS!!

That’s GOT to be it!

No sane mind could come up with a story like that from the information I gave her!
She must have spent the last few years filling her head with paperback drivel about ‘my boss is also my father’s best-friend but isn’t he gorgeous and amazingly young looking and completely willing to throw me up against a wall and-‘

GAH! I’m doing it now!

Damn Theodora and her nasty perverted mind..
I’d never even think about something like that normally!
Who’d enjoy being held against their will by a guy’s strong arms while he kisses them and takes liberties and smiles his stupid charming sharp grin that makes my knee’s weak and-

DAMN IT THEODORA, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

My breath was coming in frustrated pants.
Mum was giving me a really odd look.

“..I worry about your imagination sometimes Ari”

My eyes went wide and I blushed to the tips of my ears.
“MUM!”

She brought her hand in front of her mouth and giggled a little.
“.. at least we know you’ve definitely noticed boys..”
It felt like my face couldn’t turn any redder.

“Mum! It’s not like THAT.”
She shot me her superior smirk and shrugged as she turned towards the door.

A step away from leaving the room she turned, her smile was warm and just a little teasing.
“It’s not THAT cold in here Ari.. come down to breakfast when you’re ready..”
She sounded so amused for some reason.
I watched her leave in confusion.

Slowly my muddled brain came to a conclusion on what she meant.
My head dipped down and with a yelp I folded my arms over my chest.

..STUPID NEW BODY!..

As if having pocket thermometers weren’t bad enough, now they act as pervy thought alarms too!
I HATE this new body.
It’s inefficient, its awkward, its soft, its short, its.. I just hate it!

With a lot more effort than necessary I launched myself out of bed and staggered to my feet.
The pink monstro-nighty swished around my legs.
I don’t want to admit it’s comfortable but I got a surprisingly good night sleep wearing it.
Maybe I can blame that on the new room or new bed instead?

It’s a workable theory at least..
I glanced at the bathroom door and sighed.

Time for round two.

======

The bathroom door slammed shut behind me and I let out another sigh.

I shrugged out of the monstro-nighty and kicked it into a corner.
Maybe if I treat it badly enough it will become unwearable quickly..

It took a bit of fiddling to get the taps right and make the shower useable.
I noticed yesterday that it took a bit more heat to make the water comfortable now.
I’m not sure if that’s related to my new body or the whole ‘suddenly being an ice-type mage’ thing.
It’s not much of a bother but it threw me off a little at first.

With a held breath I slid under the water and shuddered as it cascaded down my body.
Like yesterday, I focused on just getting used to that feeling first.

Showers are a weird thing for me.
While I have memories within easy reach from multiple lives as a women, all of the ones with relevant experiences that come to mind are from times before the concept of a ‘shower’ was a realistic idea.
One or two of them used waterfalls as very rudimentary showers at one stage in their lives but even that isn’t very helpful.

I’ve tried to desperately not think about what happened when I tried to clean down below without looking by moving the showerhead down there.

I have no idea why this bathroom has a pulsing power-shower with such a disturbingly well designed showerhead, and quite honestly I don’t want to find out why either!
..I’m safer in my ignorance on that one..

“This is ridiculous”

I couldn’t look down!
I couldn’t touch myself in any way!
I couldn’t relax!

That’s the whole point of having a nice morning shower, to relax!

My eyes feverishly shot around the bathroom through the shower curtain.
There has to be something I can..
.. I could..
..yeah.
That would work.

With a dangerous wobble I leaned out of the shower and grabbed the pack of toothpicks from the shelf over the sink.

I angled the shower head low and away from me for a minute.
It will only get in the way for this.

I hope mum doesn’t come in and see this.
She’d probably have some kind of over-the-top reaction like fainting or calling an ambulance.

My hand waved over the toothpicks with a quick enchantment.
They don’t need much, I’m only using them to hold my blood while I draw the runes.
With a grimace I put my knuckle in my mouth and bit down hard with my canine.
The blood came easily and I let it drop onto the tips of the toothpicks.

When I figured I’d gotten enough on them I pushed a small amount of power to just touch the line I use to circulate blood magic through myself for healing.
The little cut stopped bleeding and sealed over without leaving a mark pretty quickly.

It would have been near instant if I could trust my magic to behave properly but instead I have to take the long way around at the moment.

I started sketching out the runes on of the bathroom wall tiles, reading them off for added power and stability because of how messed up my magic is currently.
“Aversio.. Nebula.. Corpus.. Mentir”
That’s the first rune cluster done.

I put an ‘Aversion’ rune tied in reverse to a ‘Cloud’ rune with a ‘Body’ rune as its focus and a ‘Mind’ rune as the control.
When I activate it my body should be obscured by a cloud of condensed fog, handily generated by the shower.

“Sensum.. Torpens.. Mentir.. Corpus”
The second one done.

This one is a bit weirder.
Usually I would put something like this directly on my body but that’s not a good idea at the moment with my magic as it is, especially when I don’t want to keep it permanently.

It’s a ‘Sensation’ rune tied to a ‘Numb’ rune with a ‘Mind’ rune as the focus and a ‘Body’ rune as the control.
When I activate it I should temporarily lose all sensation of touch from my body.

With these two rune clusters I should be able to get through my showers a bit easier.

I hovered my hand over the bloody runes, giving just a gentle push of magic to set and charge them.
If I’d used much more then that I’d probably have overloaded them with how much power I’ve got built up.
The runes glowed dark red for a second and then faded back to just being normal blood.

I grabbed the shower and washed the blood away carefully.
The runes stayed behind, in the form of barely visible lines etched into each tile that can hopefully be easily ignored as some kind of persistent water-mark.

I took one deep breath and tapped the top left corner of each tile where the control runes were placed.

In seconds I could tell they’d worked.
My body felt numb all over.
The feeling threw me off for a moment but after staring at my hands and getting used to locating them with my eyes only, I felt a bit better.
The cloud took a little longer to form up but I could see a steady stream of mist traveling from the showerhead to curl around my body like a fluffy moving towel.

“That’s better..”
Without another thought I started scrubbing myself down like I used to.
It was awkward, not being able to tell if I was touching my body or not, but I quickly got used to just pressing my hands on to my body with more force than usual and moving in a grid-like pattern until I felt sure I’d covered everywhere I could.

Once all I had left to do was my hair, I reached out and carefully tapped the second tiles control rune again.

A moment later and sensation returned to my body.
I could feel my feet pressing on the bathtubs wet floor.
I could feel the warm water hitting my back and trickling down my body.
I could feel-

“..oww..”

I could apparently feel my poor abused new boobs, along with my roughly scrubbed skin, slightly bruised ribs and what felt like carpet burn between my legs.

My hand came down to my left breast and brushed a nipple, I couldn’t resist the hiss of pain that came with it.
Without a moment’s thought I pushed a small surge of energy along my healing line and sighed in relief as my aches eased away into nothing.

Okay, so the runes aren’t perfect.
Maybe if I added a collision ward to my skin?

Actually that’s probably not a bad idea in general.
It would be a good way to protect myself from quite a lot of combat magic.
Basically anything that uses solid projectiles or requires some kind of secondary liquid targeting to be effective would be completely countered.

I wonder if anyone’s thought of that before?

From what I can remember Native American, Asian and Indian mages definitely have their own kinds of body modification runes but I’ve got no experience with their systems in any way, shape or form.

My Celtic incarnations, specifically the warrior women, used a really painful process where they took dyes and copper fragments mixed into a paste, and cut themselves open to create surprisingly clear tattoos of different color depending on where they lived.

As tempting as it is to get myself a set of permanent ‘good fortune’ and ‘fair combat’ symbols on my new body, I don’t think I could handle the pain of turning myself into one big full-body scar.

Even worse, unless I can find some research on it by someone else, I’ve got no actual proof that doing something similar with a modern tattoo gun would actually work.
The patterns and symbols involved in Celtic warrior-mage tattoos are pretty complicated and only really work if another mage is the one to put the runes on you.

Most of the historic patterns I’ve seen in books are completely wrong.
They’re the type that were painted on normal warriors for a mental edge, nothing more.

Although a lot of books say they used some strange plant mix commonly called ‘Woad’, it doesn’t look like the stuff I remember people using.
I don’t actually know what our paints were made from honestly, making paints and herbal concoctions tended to be the job of the druids, we just called it ‘Misneach’ because it represented our warrior spirit and the pride of our clan.

======

A knock on the bathroom door shocked me out of my thoughts.

“Ari don’t stay in there too long, you’re going to get wrinkles before your twenty”
I grimaced and ran a hand through my still unwashed hair.

“Love you too mum..”
She didn’t hear my mutter but seemed happy to leave me to get out on my own.

I considered my options for a whole ten seconds.

I can spend another fifteen minutes carefully shampooing and conditioning my far too long hair.. naked, in this awkward shower.. or I can cheat?
..yeah.. it wasn’t THAT much of a choice..

In less than half a minute I was out of the tub and wrapped in a nice warm towel that hid my body from view pretty well.
I settled myself in front of the bathroom mirror and let out a long breath.

This isn’t a spell I’ve cast regularly.
I used it once out of curiosity and ended up with a rather annoying curl to my hair for a week.

There’s a reason you rarely see ugly mages.
One of the most popular books, the only one with a three month waiting list in place to borrow it from the Hub’s mage library, is ‘Magical you, a guide to magical grooming in all its forms’.
..Mages are still human after all..

It helps that, on average, most new non-awakened mages looking for knowledge tend to be young or insecure.. or both.

Not that I can gloat, I read it too after all.
In my defence, there happens to be a few really useful things in there.

I picked up my clothes drying spell from there with Fena’s help.
There’s ones for makeup, clear skin, sparkling teeth, good breath and pressing clothes as well.

The most relevant spell from the book at the moment is ‘Artius Capillatio’, a low level starter spell on page fourteen, the rough translation of its name being ‘perfect hair’.

It’s only a three line spell.
Even with my current overflowing magic I’d have to do something seriously stupid to mess it up.
There’s no point in even vocalising it!

Plus casting new spells using just your lines is an excellent way to boost your overall control.
It’s pretty much the only way that I know of to boost control actually..

I put my hand on my head and opened my inner-eye.
The lines were easy to find but harder to trace.

My whole body is still singing with too much power, if anything it’s gotten worse since I last checked.
Putting that aside for now, I just need to prod my core a few times and lead the power trails..

Three prods, three trails of power following three separate lines.

It’s like juggling to keep it all going the right way.
Finally I reached the end of all three lines and dipped partly back into the real world to finish off the spell.
My hand trailed from the top of my head and slid down my hair to the tip.
That last gesture is a key component of the spell, most of its power is coming through the lines in my hand so it’s un-skippable sadly.

Just before my hand left the back of my head with a flourish I felt it.
A spark of greenish-purple wild magic jumped from one of my other lines and hit directly on the second active one for the spell.

“no!”

There was no point in even trying to stop it.
My hand had already left my head.
With a cringe I froze up expecting.. well, just about anything honestly..

It’s called ‘wild’ magic for a reason.

Slowly my scalp started to warm up.
My hair smoothed out flat with my fringe falling low enough to touch my eyelashes.

For a second it seemed to stop at that.
“.. luckyyy..”
My reflection agreed with me.
With that much power and wild magic I’m amazed it stopped at-

My hair twitched.

-damn it! I had to open my big mouth didn’t I?
My hair twitched again and my scalp started becoming slightly hotter.
With explosive force my hair grew a good five inches longer than it had been before.

“Damn it!”

As if my words were a catalyst the heat spiked again and my hair gained another handful of inches.
I took hold of a piece that had settled on and draped slightly past my boobs for inspection.
The hair was sleek and shiny, absolutely perfect.

To add insult to injury the hair in my hand decided to curl at its tip in a wide barrel curl.
The rest of my hair decided to join suit a moment later.

One glance in the mirror told me everything I needed to know.
I looked like I’d just spent three hours in a salon!

“..stupid beauty magic..”

I was still feeling a bit lost, staring at the strand of hair in my hand and watching the rest of it settle perfectly into place around me as if blown there by a gentle breeze, when mum knocked on my bathroom door and came walking in.

“Ari, what’s taking so.. oh..”
Her eyes went a bit wide and her hand came up to cup her mouth a little.

I awkwardly picked up the brush someone had left by the sink and tried to look like I hadn’t just monumentally messed up a basic hair fixing spell.
“..wow.. Ari, honey.. I know I said to dress nice for him but..”
She seemed a bit lost for words.

Her eyes seemed a bit glazed too.
If I’m any judge, she’s few moments away from dipping back into her trance-like mental fog over this!

Time for more damage control.

I plastered a weak smile on my face and pretended to primp in the mirror a little.
“It’s nothing mum, you know what my hairs like, it’s got such a subtle curl to it normally, people don’t tend to realise how long it really is”

Please buy it, Please buy it, Please buy it..

Her face scrunched up a little but the glaze seemed to drift away over the course of a few painful seconds.
Finally she settled on a smile and came over to hug me.

“I know Ari, it’s just been so long since I saw your hair maintained properly, you should take care of it like this more often..”

I cringed a little but tried to cover it when I met mums eyes in the mirror.
She seemed to buy my weak excuse for now but I’ve most likely just set myself up for more hassle down the line.

..I hate magic sometimes..

“Sure mum, maybe you can show me some new things to do with it at some point?”
Mum’s eyes lit up at that suggestion and she gently patted the top of my head with a smile.

Technically I’m just adding fuel to the fire here but if she can show me ‘officially’ how to braid my hair then half my problems with it are solved.
I can cope with long hair for now, as long as it’s practical.
I’ll find an excuse to cut it as soon as I can get a free moment in town.

From the look on her face, I’m pretty sure mum would do anything to stop me from cutting it short at this point but it’s MY hair.
I’m not THAT far under her thumb yet!

..stupid magic..

“Come on, let’s get a quick breakfast and we can sort out the chores.”
I let her guide me out into my bedroom and split off to my new wardrobe while she carried on into the hallway.

After a moment considering all the new options I grabbed a pair of the short-shorts Sarah chucked into the cart yesterday.
Pairing them up with a long T-shirt and some sandal’s should be casual enough to get the cleaning done while being cool enough that I won’t melt by lunch time.

She MAY have bought them as a joke but I’m perfectly happy to use those shorts when the situation fits.
It’s going to be far too hot today to wear jeans while cleaning.
Only mum and me are here anyway, it’s not like anyone else is going to see me.

I pulled open my dresser and got undies, plain cotton, I made an effort to ignore all the frilly, lacy satin stuff Sarah got me yesterday.
I’m sure someday I’ll run low enough to actually use them but my draws are fully stocked at the moment.

“Toast’s getting cold Ari”
The long T-shirt flowed over my head and settled around my thighs, just long enough to hide the shorts if I stand straight.
It’s a cute look, very comfortable too.
“Coming..”

Hopefully cleaning won’t take too long.
I want to relax after all.

======

“pheeww..”
My butt landed hard on the sofa and I flicked my legs up so I could lay out across the whole chair.

Bonus number two of this new body, my legs are short enough to lay flat out on the sofa without dangling over the edge.
It’s not much of a bonus I’ll admit, but I’m taking my victories where I can!

Cleaning went well, it could have been a lot worse.
Mostly mum just got me sweeping and mopping the floors.

She had all the nasty jobs.
I didn’t argue.

I can’t stand getting cleaning fluid on my hands, it makes them really rough and disgusting.
I’m not sure if that is a leftover from one of my past incarnations or just me being fussy but the smell of cleaning fluid puts me off these days.

My eyes flicked lazily over to the clock on the wall.
One-thirty.
The Martials and their new ‘cute’ nephew are due over at about six, that’s when Mr Martial should be home from work.
Four and a half hours to kill..

I could watch TV.
I could meditate.
I could go for a walk.
I could do practically anything.. or I could lay here and take a nap until mum wakes me up to get ready?

It’s such a nice day.
Mum’s already gone outside to read her book on the balcony.
This sofa’s a lot softer then I remember too..

A little nap won’t hurt.

I stretched out like an overgrown housecat and groaned as my back did the closest thing it could manage to 'clicking' delightfully.
A little nap definitely won’t hurt right about now.

======

“Ari, time to get ready honey”
I groaned and rolled about on the sofa a few times before giving up.
One last push, I managed to roll to my feet.

Mum watched me with amusement.
She’d caught the sun a bit from sitting outside.
A glance at the clock again told me I’d slept for a solid four hours.

Not bad.

Mum followed me up to my room and when I opened my wardrobe she was there, ready with a ‘suggestion’ of what I could wear.
..It was a dress naturally..

I was feeling mellow enough though to not argue, for once.

It’s not a bad dress.
A flowing white, cross-backed beach dress that ended just past my knees with nice blue detailing along the edges.
If I was any taller or better built it would be a problem but it should fit nicely about my, now slender, neck and more importantly it feels light.
It should be comfortable when I get it on, especially in the afternoon heat.

I’d have to skip wearing a bra with it but that’s not exactly a bad thing.

After sleeping in one for the last few hours I’ve come to realise how annoying bras can be.
It’s lucky I can still use my healing blood magic, otherwise I’d have some nasty red marks on my back at the moment.

While mum left to get herself ready I pulled my long T-shirt off and slipped into the dress.

For a second I considered changing out of the short-shorts but a look in the mirror told me that no-one would be able to tell I had them on underneath.
I felt a bit more secure knowing that there was an extra layer of clothing between my new genitals and the open air.

No matter what mum said, it’s still very plausible that the Martials new nephew is a perv.
I know its stereotyping but if mum thinks he might be a good match for me then he’s probably about my age.

Well.. my ‘apparent’ age, it’s a lot creepier if you consider that he could be my mental age instead..
Anyway, teenage boys aren’t known for being mature or even-minded around girls.

Not to be a narcissist but in this dress, with this stupid flowing perfect hair, petite but well developed body and far too cute face.. I’d date me.. if I was a teenaged boy again at least.

I eyed the makeup case sitting on my dresser.

Mum will expect me to do something with it.
If I don’t she’ll probably just make me come back and do it anyway.
If I do it myself, she might even let me get away with barely anything.

I popped open the tube of lip-gloss and gave my lips enough to be visible.

After a moments consideration I grabbed the eyeliner pencil and carefully did my eyes too.
Just enough to make them ‘pop’.
I’ve always been a sucker for pretty eyes and the eyes on my new face just beg for a little something extra.

While I inspected my work in the mirror I had a moment’s pause.

My new eyes are green..
I could have sworn that when I checked the mirror at our hotel in Bolivia they were more of a purple-y blue?

It must have just been the poor lighting..

Hotel bathrooms in the middle of nowhere aren’t exactly known for having the best internal lighting after all and my eyes are definitely green.
A nice muted green that seems to suit my complexion quite well actually.

I turned away from the mirror and almost walked into mum.
She was giving me a fond look.
Her hand came up and cupped my cheek a little.

“You’re getting really good at that, understated but pretty.. I approve”
My belly felt warm for a moment with pride.

It’s nice to have mum praise me even if it IS about my makeup skills.

It seems mum had a similar idea to me.
She’s put on a light blue, ankle-length, halter-neck patterned sundress.
This kind of weather just begs you to wear floaty, light clothes.
The style really suits her too.

“If you set the table, I’ll finish up dinner before they get here. Lily’s always early.”
I nodded and got to work.

It turns out mum never did move the dining table from its little viewing tower.

With the windows open I actually enjoyed setting the table.
The breeze was nice.
I discovered the joys of a cool breeze while wearing a dress a long time ago, it’s not changed since the last time Sarah talked me into wearing a sundress on a hot day.

I moved back into the kitchen to get a jug of juice from the fridge when someone knocked on the front door.

We shared a look but mum had her hands full with dinner so I trudged off to go answer it.
It felt weird walking down the hall to the front door.
We don’t tend to use it that often, the back of the house is the REAL front door.
Most people we know use it instead.

I’m guessing the Martials are using the street-side front door because their nephew’s with them.
It would be kind of rude to bring someone new in the back door like that.

I reached the door and pulled it open with a smile.
“Hi Uncle Jim, Hi Auntie Lil-”

My mouth froze.
The rest of me followed.

“Arista sweetheart, it’s been SO long”
Lily Martial rushed forward to hug me tightly but I was a bit busy gaping at the person standing behind her.
He looked a bit younger than usual, at a guess maybe eighteen or nineteen now, probably just a minor illusion..

His sharp little smile made me want to punch him in his, oh so perfect, teeth!

“Ah, sorry. I completely forgot.”
Aunt Lily let go of me and turned to my side so we were both facing the same way.
“Arista, meet my sister’s son Max.”

His smile took on a lot more amusement from Lily’s introduction.

He stepped forward and reached out a hand to shake mine.
I glared at him for all I was worth but it didn’t seem to affect him in the slightest.
Fully aware of our audience I reluctantly reached out to limply shake his hand.

He grasped my hand gently, in one smooth movement twisted it and planted a kiss on the back.
I almost slapped him right there!

Only the watchful eyes of the Martials held me back.
My face burned red in frustration and suppressed rage though.

My eyes were drawn to the brand mark on his left cheek and I felt my lips twitch a little in amusement.
He seemed to understand what I was reacting to because his smug smile slipped a touch with annoyance.

He covered it quickly enough for most people’s eyes but I know him too well to miss something THAT obvious easily.

“Arista, a beautiful but unusual name, it suits you.”
His smug smile was back in full force.

“Max, short for Maximillian or the more interesting Magnus?”
His smile became a bit strained again.

Two can play the name game Johnny boy..

While I’d been busy having a stare off with John, mum came to see what was taking so long.
I caught her and Aunt Lily sharing a knowing look which annoyed me to no end.

I’m taunting a hated rival, not flirting with the new boy damn it!

“Maxarimus actually, it’s a family name.. from the old country”
My eyes rolled back to him and he got the full blast of my annoyed look.

Mum made her way inside and led the Martials in behind her.

John finally let go of my hand so we could follow them.
We walked side by side into the house, despite every nerve in my body screaming at me to just shove him backwards and slam the door in his face instead.

“Why are you here Johnny?”
I carefully kept my eyes forward and kept my voice at a low mutter, for his ears only.

He turned to me with a blindingly bright false smile.
“I’m visiting my beloved Aunt and Uncle for the summer, why are you here?”
I growled low in my throat.
“I’m living with my mother because some asshole decided to use old magic to fulfil his sick desires and left me looking like a bloody teenager!”

The footsteps in front of us came to a stop.
I glanced up and let off a nervous laugh when I found all three ‘adults’ looking at us curiously.

“No, I don’t have a girlfriend. I tend to be a bit shy around girls my age”
My head swung back around to John.
He gave me an amused eyebrow in response.

Dreading what I’d see, I slowly turned back to the ‘adults’.
Mum and Lily were looking far too amused.

At least Uncle Jim was giving John a warning look.
He’s always been protective over Sarah, I guess that’s carried over to me now too.

We reached the dinner table and before I could move far away from John everyone else had already claimed a seat.
My moment’s hesitation was enough for John to pull my chair out for me like a gentleman.

No matter how much I glared he didn’t seem willing to accept that his help was neither needed nor appreciated.

I carefully sat in the seat and allowed him this victory.
If I did anything else it would only get a bad reaction from mum later for ‘not acting like a lady’ or something equally stupid.

“I’ll go get the starters”
Mum made her way to the kitchen.
“I’ll help”
Lily joined her.

For one awkward moment I realised what they were really doing.
I think John did too.

Uncle Jim seemed cheerfully oblivious at least.
He leaned a bit closer to me and ruffled my hair like a little kid.

“It’s been so long Ari, I’m surprised you remember us. You were barely out of diapers the last time I saw you, how have you been?”
My face pulled into a pained smile.

I would pay ANYTHING to be somewhere else right now.

“It was always funny seeing you trundle along, we used to call you ‘Sarah’s little shadow’ you know? you seemed to follow her so much..”
My ears felt hot and a trickle of either sweat or water rolled down my back.

John carefully hid his laughter from Jim but I could see it.
“You still are her little shadow”
His voice was so quite I’m almost convinced he was using some form of weak telepathy on me instead of talking.

Under the table my hands clenched into tight fists.
I was so tempted to hit him for that one!
Instead I plastered a sweet smile on my face and gave Jim an encouraging look.

This meal is going to be beyond hell!

======

At some point in the meal mum cracked open a bottle of wine.
Naturally I wasn’t offered any of it, although everyone else seemed happy to consume some.

“Where DID the name ‘Arista’ come from anyway?”
Mum didn’t even hesitate before answering.
Her hand reached across the table to pat mine.
“She’s named after my family’s ancestral guardian.”

..what?..

“The family lore says that long ago a beautiful, powerful young woman let several of our family free after their unfair imprisonment by a ruthless baron. I know its superstitious nonsense but my grandmother was a great believer in it all, she told me the story for years before she died and the name stuck with me.”
Her hand moved up a little to stroke my arm fondly.
“The moment she was born I knew that she would be my little Ari.”

..Seriously..
..WHAT?

I’ve never heard anything about this sort of thing before!

Did the memory modification do this?
How weird has mum’s life story become in her head!
She never mentions her extended family normally.
The only person I’ve ever met from mum’s family is Uncle Joe and we can all tell that he’s a special case..

“That’s so weird, my sister has a similar story with Max’s name.”
My head turned slightly to look at him out of the corner of my eye.
He seemed entirely too amused by the conversation.

“In our story Maxarimus was a roman general considered the bravest, most handsome man in the entire empire.”
Lily smirked over at John and drunkenly nudged mum with a giggle.
“He was meant to be the greatest lover too, his wife must have been a lucky lady.”

I almost dropped my fork when I felt John’s hand come to rest on my knee.

The bastard didn’t even react at all!
If I didn’t KNOW him I’d assume it was someone else from his innocently blank face.

“He helped our family escape from Pompeii the day that the volcano exploded, my mother was told his story from her mother and she told us. Tasha always liked his story and talked her husband into giving him the name without a second thought”

His hand slid slightly higher up my thigh and I flinched visibly.

“Are you okay Ari?”
Mum looked at me with some concern through her tipsy eyes.

I quickly faked a shudder and stood up, letting Johns hand fall from my leg in the process.
“Yeah, I’m fine mum. Just getting a little cold, is it okay if I shut the windows?”

Mum glanced out the windows at the last few rays of the setting sun that still crested over the mountains with some surprise.
I didn’t think she was THAT drunk yet but she wasn’t the only one who’d seemingly missed the sun going down.

“Sure Ari, we should start clearing up anyway.. us old people have work tomorrow.”

Lily gave a drunk giggle and waved her finger at me in some kind of false scolding sign.
“One day you’ll be stuck to the job grindstone and know our pain!”

Mum put her hand over her mouth but it did nothing to hide her laugh.
Uncle Jim seemed amused too but he was definitely not as drunk as they were.

Things started breaking up quickly.
After a few minutes of cleaning the Martials were standing at our front door, ready to walk the few meters across the road to their house.

Lily gave me a soppy drunken hug and mumbled something about missing me.

Jim helped her stay upright and kept a firm grip on John’s shoulder.
Judging from the looks he kept shooting John, his little thigh stroking episode earlier didn’t go as unnoticed as I’d thought.

Boy is HE in for a fun conversation when they get indoors!

Uncle Jim once made one of Sarah’s boyfriends publicly beg for forgiveness in the street because he deemed his treatment of her to be ‘ungentlemanly’.
I can only imagine how protective he’s going to be of me now, even if he DOES think John is family.

When they finally left mum shut the front door and leaned heavily against it.
She offered me a wan smile and giggled to herself.

“Sorry honey, I didn’t think I drank that much. It’s gone right to my head for some reason. I’m going to go to bed early, will you be okay on your own?”
I smiled at her and nodded that I would.

I’m kind of glad she’s going to be sleeping honestly.

It will give me more time to set up the protective enchantments I need to put on all the doors and windows.
Now I know that John is living LITERALLY next door I need to block his magical signature from entering the house, FAST!

======

“ugg..”
I rolled onto the sofa and considered just staying there to sleep.

It took me a good few hours of work to enchant all the entrance’s to block out John.

I’m feeling a bit light headed.
That’s one of the downsides to blood magic.
Your body can only make so much blood at a time, unless you use some really dark lich-level rituals to change that of course..

With the ring of blood I had to draw out around all the doors and windows in the house, on top of the runes I needed to add to each ring AND the fact that I had to cycle my blood magic through my body to heal faster which uses some blood up as well, I’m pretty sure I’ve made myself slightly anaemic..

My limbs feel heavy and it’s kind of hard to breathe right.
Hopefully some sleep will help me get some strength back but I’m probably going to feel lousy for a few days after this.

It was worth it though.

Every entrance to the house is now warded against John!
Like an uninvited vampire at someone’s home, he won’t be able to step over the threshold or even climb in through a window.

I’m glad I did mum’s bedroom windows first.

She’s completely out of it at the moment but the way I’m feeling now I’d have probably just ended up tripping over something in the dark and waking her up.
That would lead to awkward questions that I’m REALLY not up to answering at the moment.

My back felt nice on the slightly warm sofa’s material.
I didn’t resist snuggling tighter into it this time.

I’ll have to get to work on a ward-stone for the house at some point.

They can give a lot better protection and it’s harder for anyone to get past their defences.
Maybe I can slip some ‘ill intent’ wards onto it, to stop most baddies from even coming near the house.
I can probably break ground and fit the ward-stone in the elevator shaft by the kitchen.

It’s roughly central to the building and who’s going to look underneath the lift that we aren’t meant to use anyway?

My head drooped a little more.
I feel a little woozy..
Remind me to not use this much blood magic in one go again?

I hate this feeling.

Hopefully I don’t puke.
The last time this happened I had to tell people I had the flu I was so pale and sick.
That’s going to be a hard sell in the middle of July.

My head tucked tightly into the sofa and I sighed.
..There are worse places to sleep then here I guess..

======

“You didn’t stay up all night watching TV did you?”
I groaned and tried to push myself deeper into the nice comfy bed.
“Come on Ari, let’s have breakfast before I go to work.”

My stomach grumbled in joy at the idea of food.

It takes a lot for my body to recover from this much blood-loss.
I need some vitamin C and Iron supplements honestly.

“We got orange juice?”
My mouth felt nasty.
Another annoying side effect of my body trying to recover, a lack of fluids.
Orange has liquids and vitamin C, two birds with one stone.

“Yes, I’ve got a bottle of fresh OJ in the fridge..”
Mum sounded a little confused but didn’t ask why I was asking.

With a groan, usually reserved for the undead hordes of a zombie movie, I shoved myself off the sofa and staggered to my feet.
My balance is a bit off, to add to the fun.

This morning sucks!

“Are you okay Ari? You look pale..”
Mum came over and rested her hand on my forehead a little.
I leaned into her touch without thinking about it.

“You’re not warm, that’s strange..”

It took all of my willpower to not lean into her for some help standing up.
“I just feel a bit ill. I’ll be fine in a while”
Mum didn’t look convinced but she didn’t push me on it either.

“If you’re not better by tomorrow I’ll get Sarah to take you to Doctor Carson for a check-up.”
She took hold of my arm and helped guide me to one of the chairs around the dining table.

“Stay there, I’ll go get you a big breakfast and some OJ, okay sweetie?”

I leaned forward, rested my head on my hands and nodded lazily.
I feel like crap..

Mum took a while making breakfast.

She ended up nudging me a little until I lifted my arms enough to fit the food under them.
For a moment I almost planted my face back down into the plate but managed to keep myself awake enough to avoid that embarrassing mistake at least.

“Are you going to be okay on your own today?”
I slowly shoved a piece of bacon in my mouth and chewed thoughtfully.
When I managed to gulp that piece down I looked up at her and nodded.

“I’m probably just going to sleep a lot, that usually helps when I’m ill..”

Mum nodded and gave me a tender smile.
I tried not to stare at it too much, shifting my focus to the glass of orange juice instead.
With a slightly shaky hand I managed to lift it to my lips.
After the first gulp my eyes perked up a little.

The juice tasted amazing!

Without a thought I started gulping down the rest of the glass, going so far as to tilt my head back so I could get the last few drops quickly.
Mum was watching me with some amusement.

“Thirsty?”

I gave her a weak smile and looked back down at my breakfast.
I hadn’t even registered before that mum had made so much.
It’s been a long time since I last had mums version of a full breakfast.

I’m surprised she had time to make it, she said she had work this morning?

A glance at her told me that she was completely unconcerned with the time at the moment.
As if reading my mind she smiled reassuringly and picked up her own fork again.
“I called in to the office so they would know I will be a little late, I’ll make up the hours later in the week.”
My head nodded to her and I focused back down on the food that my hand was busy shovelling slowly at my mouth.

It seems that mum’s job hasn’t changed much.
They have this ‘flexi-time’ thing that lets them build up overtime and then use it when they need it.

I dunno the actual rules involved, it was kind of useful when we were kids though.
Mum used to take us to doctors and dentists appointments in the morning and be back to work by eleven, a few long lunch’s later, she would be back to working normal hours without a fuss.

When we got older she used to go in an hour early and get herself an afternoon off on Fridays.

I think she really enjoyed that option.
That was the most common day I’d come home to find her chatting on the balcony with Lily Martial over a cup of coffee.

“Are you finished?”
I glanced up at her and back down at my plate.

..Huh.. apparently I am?

I must have been shovelling the food in mindlessly while thinking.
I didn’t know, I knew how to do that?.. Learn something new every day I guess?

Mums hand came up and stroked my cheek.
“Go to bed Ari, you really need some sleep.”
I couldn’t argue with her on that one.

With a lot more effort than I thought necessary I got my feet under me and shambled into my room.

I’ve got to find a new type of magic to specialise in.
Blood magic works with my sympathetic magic and runes really well, with a fair few added bonuses of its own on top, but the after effects are really not worth it sometimes!

======

A knock at the door woke me up.

I tried to ignore it for a while, I figured if it’s the postman he can come back another time.
After almost five minutes he hadn’t stopped casually knocking on the door in random bursts.

Feeling grumpy and just a little off balance still I made my way down the hallway to the front door.

With a sigh I pulled it open.
I could already guess who was on the other side.
He stood there in the mid-day sun smiling at me warmly.
“Arista”

His smile turned slightly smug but he didn’t make a move to approach me at least.

“My names Hannah, I told you that already.”
He frowned at me and folded his arms as if I’d offended him somehow.
“That’s not what your mum said..”
I glared at him and huffed loudly.
“Someone already got to her, Hannah’s my middle name as far as she’s concerned..”

His eyes seemed to twinkle a little in mirth.
“Great minds think alike, as far as Lily and Jim are concerned my name is ‘John Maxarimus Jones’, they just know I prefer to go by Max these days”
He gave me a smug look as if he’d managed his little deception better than I had.

My teeth grit together slightly, it doesn’t help he actually HAD done it better than me.
People actually call HIM his name, I still get called Ari by mum as soon as we’re away from the public eye!

It took me a moment to remember why I couldn’t just step out there into the bright sunlight and punched him in his stupid, perfect teeth.
When my sluggish mind caught up with reality, the reason left me struggling not to smile.

“This isn’t a conversation to be had on a doorstep, why don’t you come in? We can be civilised about this..”
John looked almost pleased at the invitation.
“That’s more like the Ari I know. Decorum above all else, tea can mend any wound..”

I didn’t answer him, just left the door open and started walking back into the house.
In my head I was counting the seconds until he would follow.

It was obvious when he took the bait.
I heard a footstep or two and then the sound of a gong being struck.
As quick as possible I whipped around to watch him sail out across our driveway and bounce a few times before coming to a stop in the middle of the street with a stunned look on his face.

HA!
THAT felt good.
That’s what I needed.
I feel a bit better already!

As a bonus, it also proved neatly that my blood runes are working as planned.
He can’t enter the house even if I invite him!
If anything it’s BETTER than the natural magic’s that block vampires from entering most houses.

“..ow..?”

I grinned at him as he slowly made his way to his feet.
His arm seemed to have some road-rash on it from how fast he was pushed across the rough cement of our driveway.
He seemed kind of stunned still too, as if he wasn’t sure why I would do something like that to him.
..stupid bastard..

“You turned me into a bloody girl John! Did twenty years of friendship mean nothing to you?!”
His face went slack in surprise and he squinted at me.

I don’t hear an apology.. just looking at him is pissing me off even more!

“You get it into your head that I’m the next version of your ex-girlfriend and suddenly you treat me like some kind of prize to be won!”
My foot stamped hard on the floor without conscious effort from me.

“I was the one who taught you how to burp the alphabet! I was the one who showed YOU how to throw a punch! I was the one who listened to you mooning over my sister for years!”
My foot stamped again in frustration.

“Get it through your thick head! I. AM. NOT. ARISTA! My name is Hannah, if you can’t handle that I’ll even accept being called ‘Al’ again as long as no-ones around to hear you!”

He didn’t react.
His mouth was gaping open and he was watching me with a small amount of fear in his eyes.
With one final authoritative stamp I glared at him and slammed the front door.

I want to go back to bed.. I’ve got a headache.
Stupid John, Stupid MAX, stupid, stupid, STUPID!

“Why can’t he just leave me alone..”
I made my way back into my new room, curled up in my new bed and collapsed in exhaustion.

The next time something like this happens I’ll give up all pretence of normality and just let my new ice-talent loose on him!
Let’s see how he likes being the world’s biggest ice-cube for a week or two!

“Stupid John”

I rolled over and grabbed a pillow to hug to my chest.
Maybe if I close my eyes and hope really hard then life will go back to normal again!

No more bipolar mum.
No more annoying new body.
No more unstable emotions.
No more magic troubles.
No more.. No more JOHN!..

I squeezed my eyes shut tight and opened them a moment later.

My hand came up for inspection.
It was still slender with delicate little nimble fingers and smooth hairless skin.

“Figures..”

I rolled back over one more time and tried to get some more sleep.
..I hate magic sometimes..

Trust is something that's hard to build but easy to lose. Events unfold including but not limited to: A hallway getting redecorated. (in a rather cool way) And Hannah plays charades with an excitable imp.

“Lets go”

Sarah’s eyebrow popped up but she didn’t put the car in gear.
“Nice hair.. little tense are we?”

I growled at her and slammed my fist into my leg to resist the sudden urge to hit her.
“Get me out of here now, before I turn your car into a swimming pool and find several people to drown in it”

Sarah’s smile slipped and she turned the key quickly making the engine roar.

“Jesus, that bad?”
I glared at her again and huffed to myself.

Yes, it HAS been that bad.
Did the uniform I’m wearing not tip her off in some small way?
The fact that I had to sprint from the house to avoid Mum AND John’s interference?

It’s been two days since my drowsy face-off with John at our front door.
Ever since then he’s been like a persistent squirrel, every time I think the coast is clear he just appears from nowhere and starts chittering away!

Mum thinks it’s, Oh so funny, naturally.
She’s been finding reasons for me to get out of the house and I can just TELL she’s trying to get me nearer to John.

She made me take the trash out last night.
I wasn’t even done with the first bag before he was there, standing casually against our mailbox with his stupid smirk on his face.

She made me go down to the resort to pick up a takeaway because ‘she didn’t fancy cooking’.
I managed to get to the crossroads safely and then THERE he was!

The bastard was waiting for me!

I tried flat out ignoring him but that didn’t work.
If anything it only encouraged him to carry on talking about whatever popped into his head.
Then.. THEN when we got into the shop and I made my order he added on some food for himself, hit my arm with a mild stunning charm so he could pay for it all first!
The whole walk back home he seemed so disgustingly smug about it.

I thought I’d be free when I got to the front door but mum had other ideas.

When her first attempt to invite him in failed, it seems he’s learnt to not try my blood wards again at least, she decided that we should have dinner on the balcony instead!
Without a thought she sent him around back to wait for us.
The moment he was out of sight she was rushing me through the front door and told me in no uncertain terms that I should go change into something fancier.

I SWEAR I almost decided to just say to HELL with it all at that point!

To add insult to injury, I woke up this morning and mum, very carefully, explained to me that Jeans and a T-shirt are NOT acceptable clothing to wear to my first ‘induction day’ at the ‘Gladstone institute for the gifted’.
It JUST so happens that she had a nice outfit all prepared for me though.
Can you guess what it is?

Chunky Mary Jane shoes maybe?
Knee-high white socks?
A stupid fussy white blouse!
A blue/green Tartan bloody SKIRT!

She got me to wear the DAMN SCHOOL UNIFORM!
I swear to the powers, if John saw me in my mad-dash from the house to the car I’m going to kill someone.. slowly!

Why did I have to tell her I was going to Gladstones?!

I didn’t even get to pick the fake school name!
It turns out the Hub already has a school/college tuition program in place under the Gladstone name.
They have a website and everything!

It shocked the hell out of me I can tell you, mum came bouncing into my room yesterday going on about how much fun I’ll have at their special events, they even run a summer camp!
Luckily I’m a few weeks too late to be shipped off for THAT little slice of hell but the glint in mums eye says that I need a new cover story by next year or I’m going to be one VERY unhappy camper.

Needless to say, I’m NOT in the mood for Sarah’s teasing.
I’m tense.
I’m grumpy.
I still feel a little ill and I’ve had just about ENOUGH of everyone!

We drove into town in silence.
She didn’t even try to put the radio on.
I think, she thought I might open up at some point during the ride.

Not likely!

The last few days feel like they have been personally crafted to drive me insane.
Meanwhile she’s been living the high life!
I bet she spent the last few days lazing about the house, doing whatever she wanted and dragging Tor along for the ride.

I MISS THAT!
I used to have that!

I’m an adult damn it!

It feels like every minute I spend in this new body with mum I’m losing more independence.
If I don’t get some stress relief soon I’m gonna do something everyone around me is going to regret!

On top of EVERYTHING else, I’m worried about what’s going to happen today..

I’ve got my meeting with the ‘Awakened mage support’ people.
I’ve worked in the Hub for years and I didn’t even know their department EXISTED.
The fact that I’ve not even heard their name in passing should be suspicious.

The fact that I’m an ACTUAL awakened mage, and I have been for YEARS, makes it downright worrying.

Sarah pulled us into a free parking spot on the street behind the Hub’s entrance way with a sigh.
“Okay..”
She turned to face me with a look of determination on her face.
“What did mum do now?”

I snorted and gave my stupid tartan skirt a slight tug downwards instead of answering.

“Com’ on Han. We don’t keep secrets. Twins don’t lie to each other, that’s the rule.”
My temper flared again.
“Well we’re not bloody TWINS anymore are we!”
Sarah leaned slightly away from me with wide eyes, I was too worked up to stop now though.
“YOU made that point perfectly clear. I’m the LITTLE SISTER now, I’m not equal anymore in your eyes! Your just like mum you’re treating me like a little kid!”
My breath was coming in short, sharp bursts.

Sarah looked hurt but I don’t CARE!

She’s just like everyone else.
Everyone wants me to be this little, perfect Arista midget CHILD!

Mum is loving it.
Sarah finds it funny.
Aunt Lily likes me better.
Uncle Jim has gotten all defensive of me.

Even JOHN likes me better like this!
Admittedly that’s mostly because he’s got his past-life as Max making him stupid and getting him to treat me like I’m the real Arista or something but he was my best friend DAMN IT!

I’ve got no friends left!

Felicia is scared of me.
John is stalking me.
Sarah is treating me like a child.

I’m afraid to go to Fena’s shop in case she hates me too!

“I’ll get the bus back”
I struggled out of the car as quickly as possible.
Sarah reached her hand out to me but I slammed the door shut and stalked off to the Hub entrance without a thought.

Everything’s so messed up.

I’m a mess.
Two days ago I thought I’d finally gotten a handle on this stuff but I’m not even close.
All the past-incarnations being back under some kind of control is helping, sure, but it’s not fixed everything!
Now I’ve had time to get used to the feeling of not having my head stuffed full of mixed feelings I can see that there’s more than just that going on.

It’s my magic, it’s GOT to be my magic.

I’m twitchy.
I’m grouchy.
Everyone and everything is just so annoying!
I’ve got so much magic inside me I can’t sit still!
I can’t think straight.
I need.. I need help..
I need a RELEASE!

I feel lousy because I used too much blood magic but that’s a physical problem.
I ran out of blood before I ran out of magic!
Do you know how messed up that is?.. of course you don’t..
It’s SCARY.
I shouldn’t have this much power in me.
I shouldn’t have wild magic in me at all!

My feet carried me to the entrance way.
It still looks run down with a blue-glowing space where the door should be.
Normally I’d stop to examine it a bit more but at the moment all its doing is annoying me even more by being yet ANOTHER weird thing in my life.

Without a pause I stomped through the blue space and came out in the Hub’s reception.

The moment I appeared the reception area went deathly silent.
All eyes were fixed on me.
People had paused mid-step to watch me with fear.
At her desk Felicia scrunched down in her chair and tried to avoid eye-contact with me.

I flexed my fingers.
I could feel magic flowing along my skin just from the movement, it’s getting so bad I can feel my skin pulse from all the built up power.

My feet took me to the desk.
Felicia looked like she wished she could be ANYWHERE but here right now.

“Where’s awakened mage support?”
I’m not in the mood for pleasantries.
Her reaction to me is just annoying me even more.

“uh.. I’ll buzz someone to lead you there..”
My eyes settled on hers and she trailed off with a little worried squeak.

She quickly ducked down and typed something on her computer.

It felt like no-one in the reception or the hallway behind it dared to breathe throughout the long minute it took for my guide to turn up.

When it did, I let out a frustrated sigh.
She’s summoned a bloody IMP to lead me around!

..No, it’s fine.. deep breaths..

I can deal with a fae on top of everything else today, its fine.
Imps are normally innocent little things.
It won’t be afraid of me like everyone else seems to be, in theory at least.
I’m not convinced of that fact, judging by the wide awe-filled look in its bulbous little eyes.

It held out a little clawed, red hand for me to take.
With a deep sigh I tried to let some of my anger go and gently took its hand.

I’m angry at life, at the people around me and myself.
This little guy doesn’t deserve any of that, it helps that I’ve always had a soft spot for Imps.
They get a bad rap.
A lot of people mix them up with goblins who are the REAL nasty little buggers.

This one in particular is bright red with leathery little wings, a pointy tail and spindly limbs coming from his little potato-like body.

Imp’s are normally about knee high on me, probably a little taller in comparison with my new smaller legs.
This little guy must be young, he’s barely up to my new knees in height.

Well.. I say little ‘guy’, honestly I have no idea of its gender.

With Imps gender tends to be more of a choice.
They don’t have genitals or anything and in all truth, I think they find humanities obsession with giving them genders and names amusing.
He looks like a little ‘guy’ to me so until he corrects me I’ll run with that.

He flapped his little wings a few times so I didn’t have to stretch down so much to grasp his hand and started leading me off into the maze of hallways within the Hub.

For the first few turns I could feel myself gearing up for another bout of rage.
Everyone we came across in the halls took one look at me and threw themselves back against the nearest wall until I passed them.
I think my little guide noticed their reactions and how it was effecting me because, by the third corridor, we ended up taking a left onto a completely empty hallway.

At first I figured it might have just been a coincidence but by the fifth corridor that we found deserted I could tell he was doing it for my sake.
..bless him..

For a moment I pulled us up short.
He turned to look at me curiously.
The moment he saw the smile on my face he gave me a pointy-toothed grin back.

It was almost cute, if you ignored all the demon-y parts of his general appearance.

Imps are kind of childish, even the older ones.
They love human attention.
Something about us paying attention to them makes them all giggly and happy.

“I’ve noticed what you’re doing little one.”
His grin dipped nervously and he tried to stub his toe innocently, it might have worked better if he wasn’t floating in mid-air.
“I just wanted to say thanks. I’ve not been having the best of weeks and I really appreciate the effort you went to for me..”

I’m pretty sure he’s blushing.
It’s hard to tell, with his natural skin color being bright red, but his chubby little cheeks seem a bit brighter to my eyes.

I rose my hand up and gently brought it down to pat his head.
His bulbous little eyes squinted down happily and he rubbed his head against my hand.
I couldn’t help but laugh slightly.
He looks like an affectionate puppy the way he does that..

When I moved my hand away from his head he tried to follow it.
In the end he got the message and flapped back up to eye level with me.

“Un-drekoo, yab-da bii san-ya.”
His high pitched voice sounded like a string of excited guinea pig squeals to me.

I know a fair few languages but the fae are surprisingly cagey about teaching outsiders their ones for some reason.
He seemed to realise that I didn’t understand him pretty quickly.

He started waving his hands excitedly instead.

“Un-drekoo”
His little clawed hand pointed at his own chest.

“uh.. you?”
That’s the first thing that came to mind.
I’ve never been good at charades.

He shook his head and tried again.

“Un-drekoo”
He pointed at his chest and then waved his arms out in a big circle.

“..you all?”
..I’m a little lost..

He drooped in the air and put his hand to his face to show frustration.

“Sorry, it’s not my fault you won’t just speak English. You obviously understand ME”
He folded his arms and gave me a slightly offended look.

“Un-drekoo, a-vas den-obo share-vas un-dente vix-us”
My eyebrow popped up suspiciously.
That’s a lot of words, I hope he doesn’t expect me to understand any of that?

With a glance at me he waved his hands dismissively as if what he’d just said wasn’t important.

..heh.. IMP-ortant..
No, focus!
The cute little imp is talking.. sort of.

“Un-vasi”
He pointed at me and puffed his chest up, walking on thin air like a stereotypical macho man.
“Un-drekoo”
He pointed at himself and touched his wings.

I considered it for a second.

“Un-vasi?”
I pointed at myself.
He nodded.
“Human?”
He nodded harder and grinned at me.

“Un-drekoo means Imp? You’re an Un-drekoo?”
He did a happy little mid-air hop and nodded again.

“Okay, progress.”
I smiled proudly and he grinned with his pointy little teeth in return.

“Yab-da”
He pretended to nervously rub his foot on the ‘floor’, then blew me an air-kiss.
“..Kiss?.. Love? H-“
He frantically nodded and waved a little.
“Love?”
He nodded again and grinned at me proudly.

“The imps love..”

“bii”
I frowned at him.
He frowned back thoughtfully.

After a moment he flapped a little harder and quickly grabbed the tips of his wings to give a surprisingly well done curtsy to me.

“Curtsy?.. no.. manners?.. no.. uh..”
What else could he mean?

For a moment I heard mum’s annoyed voice telling me off for my behaviour.
“..Lady?”
He clapped his clawed hands together and nodded happily.

“The imps love lady..”

“san-ya”
With wide innocent eyes he drew his finger across his neck and drooped his head with his tongue hanging out.
I felt a cold chill go down my spine.

“The imps.. love lady.. death..?”
He flapped excitedly and nodded.
With a swoop he dive-bombed me and spread himself out across my chest with his arms stretched wide as if he was trying to give me a hug.

I was too stunned to argue with him.

..Why did I even bother?..
With the way this week has been going I shouldn’t be surprised that even the, seemingly nice, little fae would say something like that.

Damn it!
This is the last straw!

The little imp seemed to notice my bubbling emotions.
He flapped his wings hard and launched himself backwards, away from me.

I can’t hold it in anymore..
I thought I’d finally found something, someone who was just being nice to me for the sake of it and he calls me a disgusting title like that!

My magic, so eager to be used lately, surged forth and with a strained grunt the empty hallway became my own personal ice-cavern.
I let out a calming breath that misted in the cold air around us.

That. Felt. AWESOME..

The little imp shifted his eyes around in fascination at the ice on the walls, floor and ceiling.
"Bii san-ya, tu-vesen iblay-daluna dente?"
He squinted at me for a moment, then shook his head and let off a surprisingly human sounding nervous laugh.
"Bii san-ya, tu-ves hojin-tada. Nof-alplan sevi je-kar fur-daluna"

I squinted at him in warning.
I don’t like having someone say things about me without knowing what it means.
I feel better for having actually released some of the built up magic inside me but I’m still not in the best of moods..

“We should get out of here before someone comes by, I really don’t need any more attention right now.”
The little imp nodded to me and reached his hand out for me to hold.
With careful steps I managed to get within reach.

My footing seemed surprisingly stable, considering I’m walking on ice.
I’ve never been this good on ice before.
Maybe it’s the Mary Janes?
Do girls shoes have extra grip or something?

Behind us I could hear some human voices getting slowly louder.

The little imp frantically tugged my arm forward.
I didn’t need a translation for that one.
We started with me taking one step at a time but as we progressed up the hallway I managed to walk, progressed to a light jog and on the home stretch broke into a run.

My feet didn’t slip once.
It can’t just be the shoes.
There must be some magic involved, probably related to my ice magic.

I wonder if that’s a magical trait I’ve never heard of before?
You would think someone would have mentioned it.. then again, I never thought to try walking on fire or something when I had my fire element.

Why can’t magic just be simple for once?!

We paused against the wall, just out of sight from the now ice-filled corridor.
Behind us I could hear someone talking.
A moment later there was a startled yelp and the sound of someone hitting the floor hard.
I felt a flash of guilt but I suppressed it as quickly as possible.
The imp had no such problem, he let off a string of chirping little giggles.

In the face of his amusement I felt a bit better.
It’s not MY fault my magic’s screwed up.
If I didn’t have this stupid meeting to get to I could be researching ways to FIX that problem too.
So really they brought this kind of thing on themselves.

It’s bad that I’m already resenting this meeting, isn’t it?

It’s the storyteller’s fault, because of the brand he put on me, I’ve not got a choice in being here.
Having a choice right about now would make me feel a LOT better about the situation in general..

“Lead on little guy, I can’t be late for this meeting.. sadly”
The imp gave me an apologetic look and took my hand to lead me through a few more corridors.

We only passed one other human along the way but she seemed a bit lost in her thoughts and didn’t even notice us.
Eventually we came to a stop outside a door, it looked as blank as all the others in the hub do but the imp seemed certain that it was the right one.

“Thanks for the tour little guy. Do you have a name?”
He blushed so brightly I could see it clearly this time, even through his bright red skin.
His little head shook nervously and he gave me a hopeful look.
“You want me to name you?”
He grinned his sharp little teeth and nodded frantically.

I’ve never been good at naming stuff, that’s normally Sarah’s department.

I squinted at him for a second.
My first instinct was to call him Darren but I think that’s just something wrong with my head, I always seem to default to that name.

“How do you say ‘guide’ in your language?”
He rolled his eyes at me.
"Un-vees-pla porte grap-la"

I blinked at him a few times in shock.
“All that.. really?”

He nodded and shrugged his shoulders.

“uh.. how about ‘little one’?”
He shot me a slightly annoyed look and huffed.
“Un-vees-pla porte-la”

I squinted at him hard.
“That’s pretty close to the last one..”
He shrugged and tried to look innocent.

“Well I dunno.. how do you say Darren?.. just out of curiosity..”
He seemed to think hard this time.
“Fii-lex”

I nodded to myself.
I should trust my instincts more often.

“..Felix, I like it.”
He opened his mouth to say something but closed it and shrugged his wings instead.

I smiled at him a little which made him smile back automatically.

Slowly my hand came up to pat his head again.
He brightened up at that and rubbed himself into my hand happily.

"Hip-pal jur-bak sad-in Bii San-ya"

He waved his own hand goodbye to me and shot off down the hallway, weaving a little from side to side.
Just before he turned the corner someone crossed his path.
He dive-bombed them with a high pitched laugh leaving them sprawled out on the floor in surprise.
I tried to not laugh but the look on the guys face when he realised what almost hit him WAS pretty funny.

“..Thanks Felix..”
With a regretful sigh I turned to face my newest challenge.

..This is gonna suck..

======

I pushed the door open and let out a relieved breath when I spotted a sign stuck to the inside wall that read ‘Awakened Mage Support’.
Something about the sign bothered me at first but I couldn’t quite figure out what.
After a moment I shrugged it off and made my way in.

Unlike most of the larger rooms in the hub, this one had been sectioned off into smaller rooms.

It looked surprisingly logical and sane too.
Most rooms in the Hub tend to become a bit.. eccentric after a while.
I can’t tell if it’s a conscious thing or not but the room owners tend to either change the room to suit a theme or just go crazy with colors.
Kar.. HE told me that the current pet theory goes that the ‘bleak unending white’ of the Hub’s hallways make people want to add color and personality to the spaces they actually CAN give some to.
It makes sense to me so that became my personal theory pretty quickly too.

This room just looks like a pretty standard non-magical office.
It kind of reminds me of the guidance counselor’s office in my old school honestly..

The walls are all a cheap looking crème color with motivational posters dotted around the place and a few noticeboards up full of pinned notes or leaflets on them.
The doors all have a little window in them made of that weird, no quite glass, stuff that’s designed to let light through but distorts things too much for anyone to see what’s going on inside that you see in schools.

It felt surprisingly comfortable to be in here.
It’s the first time I’ve been to somewhere in the Hub that’s looked even halfway sane.

Sitting calmly at a desk in front of the door I’d just stepped through, with a gentle slightly curious smile on her face, was a rather overweight older lady in a bright pink wool cardigan.
The poster over her shoulder was of a kitten hanging from a washing line carrying the tag ‘Hang in there baby!’.
For some reason it felt like she would be the one to have put that poster up..

When I made eye contact with her, rather large, cats-eye glasses she smiled at me brightly.

“Hello sweetie, how can I help you? Not lost I hope?”
Her voice was elderly, obviously, but it suited her.
She sounded how I imagine a favourite grandmother might sound when talking to one of their many children’s children.

Normally, being so obviously talked down to like a kid would set me off at the moment, but I felt oddly calm about it now.
She struck me as the type of person who would speak that way to anyone even SLIGHTLY below her own age range anyway.
She obviously didn’t mean anything by it, her pleasant smile put me at ease on that fact at least.

“uh..hi.. I’ve got an appointment with an awakened mage support rep?”
She nodded and smiled at me encouragingly, I couldn’t stop myself from blushing.
“I’m a little early, I made good time through the halls..”

My hands came down to fiddle nervously with the hem of my stupid tartan skirt.
After a moment I mentally slapped myself and dropped it.
I don’t know where that came from, I feel really awkward all of a sudden.

“Take a seat dear, I’ll tell Trudy that you’re here”

Despite all attempts to the contrary, I blushed and quickly shuffled over to one of the stiff little plastic chairs against the wall instead of answering her.

The old lady gave me another smile and picked up a phone handset from her desk.
I blinked owlishly at it for a second.
No-one bothers with technology in the Hub.

When you try to put cables and such into the halls they tend to disappear within an hour.
Nothing beyond the ‘default look’ remains in the halls for long usually.

It takes a LOT of magical power to stop that effect, even then things like the scratch marks on the doors have to be re-done every once in a while because they start fading away.
That’s why Felicia’s job is so important, her ancestor somehow managed to lay the cables and systems in place for her times version of ‘modern technology’ to work throughout the Hub.

Seeing a pretty normal looking telephone in the Hub feels just plain odd.
They must have their phone system LITERALLY just for the rooms they have marked out within this office..
That’s.. weird?

The rooms relatively large, most Hub rooms are really, but they can’t have divided it into more than four or five offices at best.

“Trudy, a lovely young girl is here to see you.. ah, silly me I forgot to ask”
The old lady turned in her seat and gave me a wide smile.
“What’s your name sweetie?”

I flinched at being addressed like that so casually and rubbed my hands together in my lap.
For some reason I feel really nervous at the moment.
“uh.. H.. Hannah?”

She gave me another warm smile and turned back to the phone again.
“She said her name’s Hannah, Trudy.. oh yes, she’s in an absolutely darling school uniform, I think she’s just come from the Christian private school up the road if I’ve not missed my guess.”

I cringed and ran my hands over the stupid tartan skirt again.
I KNEW this thing was gonna cause me trouble..
This is the last time I let mum push me into the bloody thing!

I’ll fake wearing it with an illusion until I’m out of her sight next time if I have to!

“oh.. that’s weird..”
The old lady looked at me over the rim of her glasses curiously.
“hmm..”
She squinted at me a little.

Eventually she seemed to see whatever she was looking for and turned back to the phone.
“Try looking under the name Arista, Trudy. The poor dear, no wonder she changed it..”
I gasped and pushed back into the chair a bit more in worry.

Not another one!

The old lady turned back to me but her smile had, if anything, gotten a bit warmer.
“Don’t worry sweetie, AMS aims to help, we learnt a long time ago to not judge someone because of who they will awaken to be.”

Her head twitched and a look of almost annoyance crossed her face momentarily.
“’AMS aims to help’ is a perfectly nice catchphrase, Trudy.. don’t be such a stick in the mud.”

The person on the other end of the line, apparently called Trudy went off on a long speech of some kind.

The old lady glanced over at me and smiled lightly.
After a moment longer she rolled her eyes and sighed loudly.
“We can talk about this in the break room at lunch Trudy, it’s hardly important right now, is it?”
She listened a while longer and puffed her cheeks up with air.

I wanted to laugh a little, she looked like Sarah does when she’s a few steps away from pouting..
Just.. you know.. older and wider.. with a pink cardigan..

“There’s nothing wrong with having some fun while you work Trudy.”
Her tone shifted back to the ‘grandmotherly’ one she’d used when I first came in.
“Now, be a good girl and come collect your next appointment before the poor dear starves to death.. she looks far too skinny as it is”

My cheeks burned in embarrassment.

That’s the second old person this week to say I’m too skinny now!
The first one being that old doctor back in the Bolivian hospital.
.. I hate this new body..

The old lady hung up the phone and smiled pleasantly at me.
“She’s on her way out Hannah dear.”

I felt a small spark of happiness inside that she called me Hannah.
She’s the first person who knows about Arista that’s done that, aside from Sarah.

Speaking of Sarah.. I really need to apologise to her later.

I shouldn’t have snapped at her like that.
She doesn’t know what kind of indignities I’ve been put through over the last few days..
With a cooler head I can see that she meant well.
I flew off the handle because I was primed and ready for a fight with SOMEONE..
She just happened to be the one nearest to me at the time.

My hand reached down to grab my phone but came up empty.
Oh yeah.. the skirt..

..stupid school uniform..

Not that it would help actually, I can’t remember the last time I saw my phone.
I think I used it to book us a flight across the border in Bolivia when me and Tor were rushing out to the tomb to fight ‘el diablo’.

I’ll have to do the summoning ritual later and draw it back to me.
Leaving something THAT magically advanced out there, for anyone to get their hands on, could be dangerous.
Especially when it’s enchanted with my blood runes on it!

Luckily one of the features I designed my phones enchantments with was a kind of ‘homing pigeon’ rune.
Once I activate it, remotely with a sympathetic ritual, anyone who comes into contact with the phone will have the burning desire to return it to me in some way.

I have a post-box set up for dead-drops of information and things I need but can’t legally be seen in possession of.
The box is miles away in Medford so I’ll have to find a free day and do some creative warping to visit it when I can, but odds are, my phone will be in there when I check.

“Hannah?”
My head shot up.. and up a little more.

“Wow..”
The tall.. really tall.. black woman smiled at me warmly.

She seemed out of place in her skirt-suit.
For some reason it feels like she should be wearing a Greek Stola dress, with thick armor plating and some kind of wide sword on her back.

She had the muscle tone and posture of a true Amazon warrior at least.. either that or an old Norse goddess..
It just feels like she should be out fighting off idiot males who dared to try and claim her.. not stuck in this little place, doing paperwork in a tailored business suit..

I shook my head quickly and blushed at her amused look.
..Where did that all come from?..

She stretched a hand out for me to shake.
Her face smoothed out into a wide welcoming smile when I took it and gave it an awkward squeeze before letting go.

“Hi Hannah, I’m Trudy. I’ll be your rep while you get settled into the AMS program, come back to my office”
She waved me up from my chair and started walking down the little hallway between the divided offices.

I quickly followed her, fidgeting with my skirt a little nervously.
I feel even more out of place in this thing when faced with her.

She’s so.. big.
Not just in actual size either, her shear presence seems to have filled the room since the moment she entered it.
In comparison, I look like I’m skipping out from school.

I FINISHED SCHOOL SIX YEARS AGO DAMN IT!

“Penny for your thoughts?”
I jerked my head up and looked at Trudy.
She smiled at me reassuringly.

“Don’t worry, we’re pretty casual around here. As much as the phrase annoys me, Rosemary is right, Awakened Mage Support ARE here to help you as best we can.”

She brought her hand up and ran it through her short pixy-cut, dark hair nervously.
“Honestly, we don’t get much work usually. A little Hub like Klamath falls doesn’t tend to get THAT many mages permanently living in the area, let alone awakened ones.”

My mouth felt a little dry but I coughed it out and spoke anyway.
“How many are around at the moment?”

Trudy paused and looked thoughtful.
“About a hundred mages, only two awakened ones currently.. don’t worry, they both tend to keep to themselves mostly.”
She smiled warmly.
“Dizzy is a laugh if you get the chance to meet her but..”
She stopped for a moment, she seemed to be judging her words carefully.
“..not to sound harsh or anything.. but try to avoid Johnny. He had some problems with his awakening and he can be a bit.. intense.”

I snorted in agreement without a thought.
She sent me an odd look in exchange.
“You’ve met him?”

I almost laughed at the irony of that question.

“He’s currently living across the street from me.”
Trudy flinched a little.
“oh…”
Her eyes went a little wider suddenly
“Ohhh.. I wondered why the name ‘Arista’ sounded so familiar..”
I flinched this time.

Is she going to be like everyone else?

After a moment to gather herself she looked at me curiosity.
“It’s funny, you’re not at all like how he described you..”

My cheeks flushed and I scowled darkly.
“I’m not her. He thinks I’m Arista and he won’t leave me alone. It.. it’s driving me CRAZY!”
My hands balled into fists.
I could already feel water slowly dribbling out of them from the diverted ice magic.

“Hey, hey, hey..”
Trudy turned around and knelt down so we were at the same eye level.
It annoyed me a little that she was so much taller than me, even if you take away a few inches for her shoes.
She’s got to be over six foot easily, Six-five at worst.

That’s far too tall for a woman who works in an office!

“Hey..”
She nudged my face up with her finger.
The moment her hand touched my chin she pulled it away with a hiss.
“..wow..”
She seemed a little stunned for a moment.
Her eyes were locked on her finger in amazement.

Finally her eyes rolled back up to me with a considering look on her face.

“Come with me, your magic is.. you need some stress relief, I know just the place.”
I opened my mouth to argue but closed it quickly.

Some stress relief would be VERY welcome right about now..

She turned right and led us to a small box corridor between the office spaces.
Her head turned slightly toward me and she smiled conspiratorially.
“I’d appreciate it if you don’t mention this to HR. They’d have a fit if they knew about this place but sometimes you just need to let off some steam, right?”

I nodded and my lips twitched into a weak smile.

Of course I knew what it was like to need to let off steam.
I used to do it literally, now I turn corridors into ice-caves instead.

She reached the door at the end of the hallway and opened it.
I could feel the difference from here.
The door is magical.. I’ve felt this type before.

It’s like the door on the yacht that led us into Dante’s base.

“An expanded room?”
She looked over at me with surprise and smiled a little.
“It used to be our storage cupboard but.. well, it gets kind of boring around here most of the time so I started tinkering and..”

She blushed a little and quickly tried to shift attention away from herself with a nervous laugh.

“It’s fully isolated from the rest of the Hub. It’s more of an expanded space then a real pocket dimension, like those shopping bags they sell at the uptown market in Eugene. The ones with the expansion enchantment on them, so their bigger on the inside.”
I nodded and let her lead me inside.

I’ve never seen one of those bags in person but I understand the theory behind them already.
It’s a tricky little spell to pull off.
It takes some pretty good timing and a fair amount of power to get the initial spell in place and then a lot of time for it to settle in enough to truly become ‘enchanted’.
That’s why the bag’s cost so much.

Any half-whit new mage could expand the inside of a bag, and five minutes later when the initial charge runs out they would have a torn bag with a pool of dropped items around them for their troubles.

That’s the difference between someone who knows magic and a specialist enchanter.
Time, knowledge and pure skill.
Glancing around the surprisingly large room, I had to nod to myself approvingly.

I doubt I could have done better with the space she started from.
The ceiling’s pretty high.
I’d be tempted to put in a few more floors going up but maybe she has a reason for not doing that?

“This is really impressive, what runic language did you use?”

She blinked a few times in surprise and her smile spread even wider.
“Fancy yourself an enchanter, do you? I’ll warn you it’s a hard job, a lot of un-awakened mages can’t handle the workload”
She seemed a bit smug at admitting that fact.

I can understand why.
If she’s not had her awakening then this really IS impressive.

I’d never be able to pull something like this off without the background knowledge I picked up from all of Arista’s incarnations.
They gave me the kick-start I needed to learn enchanting myself.
They made studying a lot easier too, it felt more like revision then actually learning at times.

“I’m an enchanter by nature. My past-incarnations have a thing for sympathetic magic.”
Trudy’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.
“You know about your past-incarnations already? I was wondering why you were here to see me, I normally end up with doing damage control for the new awakenings and helping the locals out when they mess up in some way..”

I perked up an eyebrow in response.

Doesn’t anyone talk to anyone else around here?
Surely she got some kind of message about me.

Not that I’m proud of it or anything but having ‘Arista’ awaken is kind of a big deal usually.
In the memories I have where her incarnations came into contact with some kind of formal magical government, most people tend to lose their minds a bit at first.
Everyone’s so excited to meet Arista.. they used to be at least..
For a while her incarnations started flying under the radar more often than not.
Now everyone’s treating me like I’m a bomb ready to go off..
I’ve got no idea what changed in the meantime.

“I’m already awakened?”

Trudy flinched a little and blinked rapidly at me.
“no way..”
I frowned at her this time.
“yes way.. its not even my first awakening”
I don’t know why but for some reason that felt like important information I should tell her right now.

Her mouth gaped at me.
For a moment there was a flash of fear in her eyes.

I felt my frustration flare again.
So THAT’s why she was being nice to me.. she didn’t think I was Arista.

‘Didn’t’ being the key phrase now..

“How are you.. you said your name was Hannah?”
I glared at her and she shrunk back away from me.

It probably looked kind of funny from an outside point of view.
This statuesque, athletic woman shying away from a teenager in a stupid school uniform.

“My name IS Hannah. Just ‘coz I awakened doesn’t mean I’m going to automatically think of myself as her ya know..”
She straightened up a little and seemed to be considering that.

“You have a point, Dizzy’s like that, it’s rare though. I’ve never heard of such an..”
She seemed to consider her words again.
“You have a long lineage of past-incarnations, usually one of them becomes dominant in cases like yours..”

I smirked to myself a little.

I have a fair amount of experience with that kind of thing.
I beat them all into silence the first time.
Now I’ve found a workaround, of sorts at least.

“I’m just weird like that.”

Trudy smiled back at me.
“Okay, I can see that.. if even half the stories I’ve heard about Arista over the years are true I’m pretty convinced you’re not her..”

My smirk slipped a little.

“.. her reputation precedes me again..”
It was meant it to be a mutter to myself but Trudy seems to have good hearing.
She put her hand on my shoulder and gave me a warm smile.

“Come on, let’s have some fun and burn off some magic.”
I returned the smile and glanced around us.

She’s got some kind of targeting range set up on the far side.
If I’m not mistaken there’s a rack of Icarus wings over in the far corner behind us too.

That must be why she left the ceiling in here as high as she has.

“What do you want to do first?”
I glanced between the two and settled on the targeting range first.
I need to burn magic, the wings would be fun and I might have a go later if we have time but magic takes priority.

Trudy followed my eyes and smiled a little.

She reached over to the wall behind her and tapped something on it.
The targets shuffled themselves around, a few of them tucked back into the side-walls and the remaining three expanded to about ten times their original size.

My eyebrow perked up again in interest.
Nice work.. very nice work..

She’s pretty imaginative with her enchantments it seems.
I wonder what she uses as an etching medium?
I can already guess, by how fast that signal moved to the triggers for all of her separate enchantments on the targets, that it’s not blood magic.

Blood magic is like old magic in some ways.
It’s slower to form and cast itself but as a trade-off blood magic enchantments tend to give you more ‘bang for your buck’ in most situations.

“Take your pick and give it a blast. I’ve not met a spell yet that my targets couldn’t repair themselves from afterwards.”

Ohhh… that sounds like a CHALLENGE!
I pushed the sleeves of my blouse up a little past my wrists and set my feet carefully.

“Brace yourself Trudy, you ain’t seen nothing yet..”
She seemed momentarily worried but with a glance back at the targets she got some confidence back.

She must have put a lot of work into them to be that sure of herself..
I’ll not go ALL out on them then, I don’t want to break her toys so casually.
..That would just be mean..

“I’m an ice mage now. I’ve got a weak diversion on it currently but it’s not helping much, it doesn’t take much of an active push from me to override it completely.”
I turned my head slightly and shot her a cocky look.
“Which would you prefer? Water or Ice?”

She grinned back at me and shrugged a little.
“I HAVE always had a thing for winter..”

..Ice it is..

I pushed into my core.
I barely needed to approach it and my magic was already jumping to be used.

The magic running through my lines started following the string of magic I pulled from my core.
It felt amazing to drain off so much power all at once.

I have to be careful, if I hold it in one spot for too long I’m likely to hurt myself.
My hands used to get burned a lot if I held a spell for too long, I dread to think what internal damage that could happen if I flash-froze my hand because I held on for too long!

My breath came out in a thick fog of condensed water.

My skin was singing with power.
I could feel little tendrils of it breaking away from my flesh and waving carelessly in the air around me.

Trudy had taken several steps away from me.
She reached out to the wall beside her and tapped something.
A near invisible wall of power formed up between me and her.

..Now why didn’t I think of that?..

If nothing else I’m going to have to keep contact with her after all this, just to have someone I can talk to about enchanting with.
She might actually be able to keep up with me..

My magic rolled around my body in one bubbling wave.
I’m pretty sure if I had any form of mage sight on at the moment, I’d be blinded by the corona of power my body is giving off.

Without a word I cupped both hands to my chest and pushed them forward.

A burst of frozen blue power washed across the room in a tidal wave.
I sunk to my knees and panted hard.

That… felt… AWESOME…

My knees are weak.
It felt almost orgasmic when I pushed it all out like that.
I’ve never let off that much magic at once.
I’ve never HAD that much magic TO let off before!

It’s intoxicating.. I could get addicted to this very easily.
Why have I never let magic out like this before?
..It felt SO GOOD..

My head slowly moved up to look forward again.

I feel hollow, so deliciously empty..
It feels like I barely have any magic left at all!

It won’t last, I can already feel more magic pouring in to replace what I just lost.

At the rate I’m going I’ll have barely a minute before I’m at, what I consider to be my ‘maximum power’ level again.
Hopefully it will stop there or at least slow down a bit, otherwise I’m going back to feeling overly saturated with magic within half an hour!

My bleary eyes finally settled on the room in front of me.
.. oh… that’s why I don’t do this more often..

The football stadium sized room around us had turned into a giant ice cave.
Snow was falling down around me.

Thick icicles hung from the ceiling in deadly looking spires of hard ice.
The floor was built up into wide ramp-like snow banks on either side.
I couldn’t even SEE the targets anymore they’re so completely encased in a wall of solid ice!

.. did I really do all that?..

“..wow..”
I jumped a little at Trudy’s voice.
My hand instinctively came up and a blast of water shot in her direction.

The water came out like the hose on a fire-engine.
It missed her by the smallest of margins and splashed against the far wall with a roar of running water.
I quickly cut off the power but it didn’t help much.
A puddle had settled in that corner now, which was quickly becoming a mini-pond, in size at least.

“Sorry, using that much magic made me twitchy..”
She gave me an understanding look but didn’t stay focused on me.
Her eyes drifted around her ‘little’ stress-relief room in awe.

I focused inwards, on my body and groaned.
I think I’ve worked out why I’ve been having so many problems with built up magic lately..

The magic to cast that massive torrent of water a second ago barely touched my still refilling magic reserves.
Hell, it barely took a single lines worth of power to do the whole thing!

No wonder I’ve been building up so much magic.
Making ice from sheer magic alone takes a lot more power than a more ‘basic’ element like fire, wind, earth or water.

I’ve been trying to bleed off my excess magic spikes from when I lose control with an inferior spell!

It’s like trying to empty a river by scooping out a hand full of water at a time.
Even worse, some stupid bastards gone and dammed up one end of the river so it can’t just flow out the other side.

I’m a locus point remember, my magic’s not normal to start with!

I don’t have a set amount of magic I can generate in a day.
I constantly draw in power from the very AIR around me.
Normally it just flows out the other side without a fuss but now..

It’s got to be that stupid brand storyteller put on me!

He said it would stop me casting too many big spells.
On a normal mage that’s EXACTLY what this ‘dam’ would do.

Having a dam at the end of your magical ‘river’ to a normal mage, who barely gets a trickle through it anyway, would end up diluting their magic down over time to a point where their control is nearly non-existent.
Every bit of controlled magic they tried to push through their system would be like peeing in their ‘magical river’, sure at first it would seem potent and you could probably see it go down the lines pretty well but the more their river got stopped up, the more diluted the ‘pee’ would get until you can’t even tell it’s there!

I had enough trouble trying to follow my lines with my body saturated in magic like this and my lines are practically GLOWING with power.
A normal mage would barely be able to find the right lines to start with, without help, let alone follow them all the way to the end!
This brand would be like cutting their power down to a point where doing the same level of magic as a basic, non-awakened, mage was a struggle..

“Hannah?”
I jerked my head out of my stunned thoughts.

This brand is SICK.
It’s worse than the one that I got from Max’s old magic, that one’s an annoyance but at least it isn’t designed to basically cripple my magic!

“Hannah, are you okay?”

My eyes settled on her for a second.
I felt numb.
The storyteller is a twisted man..

..He said that they give these brands to ALL awakened mages like this?..

My eyes trained on her for a second.
She flinched back from me.
She’s scared.. good, she should be.

With a push of my already re-filled magical core I ran all eight lines I needed for a truth spell.

She didn’t have time to react before I’d finished casting it.
It’s so much easier to do when my lines aren’t flooded with power and wild magic.

“Look into my eyes and speak truth.”
I didn’t need the words but it felt good to watch her flinch back from them.
She couldn’t resist the urge to make eye contact with me.

“What do you know of the brand placed upon awakened mages by the Hub?”
Her body locked up, she tried to pull her head away but she won’t be able to.

It’s my magic against hers.
She’s millions of years too young to fight my magic in any meaningful way.

“What brands? There’s no brands put on awakened mages!”

Doubt seeped into my head.
She can’t lie while like this..

She really knows nothing..
It’s her JOB to work with the awakened mages.. how can she not know about the brands?..

I turned around, not even bothering to maintain eye contact.
I don’t need it when the spell is THIS overpowered.
She won’t be able to move until I release it.

“What do you call this then?”
With a yank I pulled my blouse loose from my skirt and showed her my back.

She gasped and struggled slightly against my hold on her.

“That’s.. there's two brands on your skin. One is South American in origin, I recognise the symbols but not the intent. The other..”
Her eyes cut upwards and stared at me.
I stared back at her with determination.

Slowly tears formed in her eyes.

“You poor girl, who did this? This is some bastardised version of the old Japanese wedding brands, their designed to make sure powerful female mages are kept under the strict control of their husbands..”

My control slipped.
The spell ended in seconds.
Trudy collapsed to her knees with heaving breaths.
For a moment I thought she was going to throw up but her head rose to look at me instead.

Her tears hadn’t stopped.

“Who did THIS! What kind of sick fu-”
She cut herself off but I could tell what she was about to say anyway.

It must be the uniform, does she think I don’t know what swearing is?

“Who did this to you Hannah?”
Her voice was cold.
It seemed almost colder than all the ice magic I was just throwing around.

The tone of her voice sent a chill down my spine as she stood to her full height.

She towered over me and for just a moment I could see her again.
Dressed in her stola with the armor plating and a huge sword strapped to her back.

She looked down at me with eyes that have seen more than just war, more than just loss.
Her eyes had seen the fall of empires..
The deaths of millions..

I could feel it!

In the blink of an eye she was back in her skirt-suit.
I blinked frantically but she didn’t change again.

Was that in my head?.. It seemed so real..

“Hannah, who did this? Tell me. I’ll help you find him and we can break the binding.. right after I break HIM..”
Her lips curled up in disgust and she almost seemed to be radiating her outrage into the air around us.

I felt warmer just being near her..

I caught the tell-tale signs of fire magic build up on her.
Her skirt-suit was smouldering in certain places.
She must be a fire elemental!

For her to be chucking out this much power as an un-awakened mage though..
.. wow is she PISSED!..

“HANNAH!”
I jumped and stared up to her in fear.

“I don’t know!”
She deflated a bit at my answer.
“He didn’t give me a name. I was in decontamination and some idiot set the alarms off, before I was let out of it, my box was intercepted.”
Her shoulders sank even more and her tears started falling again.

I watched as one progressed down her cheek and fizzed out into steam before it could hit the floor.
She’s still angry.
She’s smouldering on the inside.

I used to get like that sometimes too.

“He was in a big macho office somewhere in the Hub. He said a lot of stuff, taunted me then set something off in the box that branded me.. he.. he said you do it to all awakened mages..”
My shoulders shook a little.

He lied to me!

I don’t know why I’m so surprised, but I am.
Did he lie about everything else too?
..I don’t know what to believe anymore..

I’m not in the right emotional state to deal with this right now!

With a primal roar I twisted away from her and threw my hands out at the far wall of ice.
Javelin like spikes of ice formed up between my fingers, flying out as a mass of death to lodge themselves deep in the far ice wall.
When one round left my side another would form up to take its place.

“AHHHH!”
It felt so good to be empty before.
It felt so good to just let it go and scream now!

I felt her come up to my side more then saw her.
Her magic was warm, it curled around the waves of power I was throwing off like a soft embrace.

“ARAHH!”
Trudy let off a war-cry of rage and threw her own hands forward.
Flame-throwers worth of fire poured out from her open palms and melted deep troughs in the thick floor ice in front of her.

We both stood there screaming until our throats hurt.

Trudy’s flames died out after almost a minute of pressure.
That’s pretty impressive considering she’s un-awakened.

My ice spikes didn’t stop.
If anything I sped up how fast I was making them.
I made them thicker.
I made them harder.
I made them sharper.

I added every extra step I could think of to make them use up more magic but it wasn’t working!
As fast as I was emptying my body of magic, more of it came pouring in from the saturated environment around us.

I don’t know how long I stood there but eventually Trudy came up behind me and wrapped me in her arms.
The ice javelins I’d just been making fell to the floor half-formed and my knees went with them.
Only Trudy’s arms kept me from landing on the cold floor below.

“We’ll get him Hannah.. we will get the bastard that did this to you and he will PAY!”

I could feel it again.
I’m convinced she means every word of that statement.
Her magic doesn’t lie.
I can feel it rolling protectively over my body, trying to wrap me in a protective shell of her strength.

It won’t work.
She can’t suppress my magic, even if she pushes herself beyond her limits.
The difference in our power levels is just TOO wide of a gap for her to cover.

..I appreciated her trying though..

“Let’s get out of here, I need to start chasing him as fast as possible.”
I didn’t have it left in me to argue.
I just let her gentle movements pull me towards the door.
My eyes drifted blearily down to my feet.
They caught on one detail along the way down and I let out a snorting giggle.

“My skirts ruined..”

It was, the hem is frayed.
Patches of it are singed, others are worn as if they’ve been exposed to the elements for too long.

Our magic did that.
My magic and Trudy’s..

I wouldn’t be surprised if my blouse and socks are ruined too, her suit is probably pretty bad as well.

Hopefully my shoes are okay.
I’m starting to like these Mary Janes, their comfortable.

“Down you go”
I didn’t protest as Trudy eased me into one of the plastic chairs in the old-
In Rosemary’s reception area.
She’s nice. I should remember her name at least..

Trudy walked over to Rosemary who was watching us with wide eyes.

I don’t know what she said but I felt a bit stunned as I watched the change come over the receptionist’s soft, grandmotherly face.
The years seemed to melt off her as her shoulders pulled back tightly and her face tightened in anger.

The sleeves of her pink cardigan started smoking.
They didn’t pay it any mind.

“I’ll get right on it. The paper-trail shouldn’t be too hard to follow”
Her eyes were like hard diamonds, they matched her voice now.

She looked over at me and her look softened just a little.

“Don’t worry Hannah sweetie, leave everything to us..”
Her sweet old lady voice was back, it made me feel calmer along with her smile.

Moments later she slipped back into the cold growl she’d somehow acquired, seemingly out of nowhere.
“..the male will rue the day he drew the attention of the AMS!”

For just a second I could see it.

She was younger, thinner but by no means skinny.
She had a winged helmet on her head, armor perfectly moulded to her breasts in the brightest shade of gold.
Her hands were clutching a spear tightly in her white knuckles..

“Valkyrja..”
The word slipped out of mouth in an awed hush.

The moment broke and she became the pudgy old lady again but I could see it now.
The Valkyrja.. The Valkries.. Holy CRAP these two..

Their MYTHS!

They’re not even awakened!
They CAN’T know about it, but for just a moment I could see it..
Something beyond normal sight showed me what they had hidden at their cores.. and it’s amazing..

Trudy.
She’s an Amazon warrior.
I don’t know how I know it but I can FEEL it.
At least one of her past lives is an Amazon, another one might even be like Rosemary..

Rosemary.. what a name for her?

Imagine one of the Valkyr flying out to battle on her steed, cape floating in the breeze and death at her hands with a name like ‘Rosemary’?!
It would be funny if it wasn’t downright terrifying!

I just showed two of history’s most profound man-hating, tribal warrior, bad-ass women that a man put a messed up marriage brand on me!

I hope your proud of yourself Storyteller..
If I were you I’d be busy kissing my ass goodbye right about now!

“Team AMS, to battle!”
My eyes flew up to stare at Rosemary in awe.

She’d stood up from her desk and dramatically pointed her hand at the door while saying it too.

Trudy didn’t look amused in the slightest.
“Don’t.. ever do that again..”

Rosemary pouted, in a look which really shouldn’t suit a woman of her age, and nudged Trudy a little with one thick arm.

“Oh come on you old prude, live a little.”

I watched them both in shock as Rosemary fled the room with Trudy following close on her heels, muttering something about not being old.

“uh.. guys?”
The only answer I received was the slam of the room’s front door.

“o..kay.. then..”
I glanced around the room one more time and stood up, trying to brush off some of the new wear and tear from my skirt in the process.

“I’ll just.. go then?.. I guess?..”
No-one told me not to, so I took that as acceptance and shrugged to myself.

Just think, when I first came in here I thought this was going to be the only SANE office I’d find in the Hub.. I hope magic doesn’t make people crazy naturally..

I guess, who am I to talk?

I have a small villages worth of voices in my mindscape, that I’m probably going to listen to if they have any good points to make..
I’m twenty-four years old, going on sixteen, wearing a ruined knock-off catholic school girl outfit..

..At this point I think we can agree that ‘crazy’ is an subjective term, in my life..

History has shown that not everything is as it first appears. Events unfold including but not limited to: A snarky public transport representative (it's a shame even magic can't improve that stereotype) And Hannah visits her favourite shop.

“Why can’t I just have a normal day..”
I shot another glance around the AMS office.

The ‘Hang in there Baby!’ poster stared back at me.
It’s probably just my imagination but it feels like his little face is judging me, while he’s hanging there from that washing line..

“They didn’t tell me to stay..”
His cute, fuzzy little judgemental face didn’t change in the slightest.
“HEY, I didn’t ask to be here!”
My hand came up to point at him to emphasize my point.

It took a few seconds of staring at the tip of my finger for me to realise just what I was doing.

“I’m talking to a bloody poster..”
My eyes cut around the room quickly, no-one was here to see me make a fool of myself at least.
“I’m going!”

For a moment I almost poked my tongue out at the kitty poster but managed to restrain the urge by willpower alone.
With a huff I turned away from it and marched towards the exit.

Ever since I stepped into this office I’ve felt a bit weird.

My anger and frustration from earlier seems almost silly now.
I feel pretty guilty for snapping at Sarah.. and for ruining the clothes mum seemed so happy about getting me, even if it DOES look like a stupid school uniform.
I even felt a little upset when Trudy and Rosemary left me behind in their little ‘chase out the room’ game a minute ago.
Overall I just feel a lot calmer in here and.. maybe a bit less sure of myself, emotionally speaking?

My eyes caught on the ‘Awakened mage support’ sign by the door.
Something about it is still bothering me..

I took a few more steps towards it and squinted hard.
It’s something.. I dunno.
My brain just keeps telling me I’m missing something with the-

“No way..”
I squinted a little harder.
“The cheeky cow..”

I pushed magic along the lines necessary to activate mage-sight.
My eyes hurt a little from doing it but that’s normal for me.

It’s only two lines to start mage-sight and of all the lines in the body they’re the ‘straightest’ ones.
Even with my magic as flooded as it was earlier I could have activated it without much effort.
I’m not naturally good at it because of how weak my lines to my eyes are, so I have to slowly let just a trickle of power along them instead and let it build up over time until they’re ready.
It’s still one of the only spells I can feel certain I won’t mess up at the moment, considering I messed up a basic hair spell this morning..

“That’s ingenious..”

The sign was glowing!
I could read the patterns easily now.
This must be how she did her enchanting before.

Water has the best response time of any enchanting medium but its biggest problem is that it’s hard to make it stay in the pattern you set for it.
It’s mostly used by Asian mages these days, they use rice-paper to soak up the water in the right design and then burn the paper while it’s sitting on the item to be enchanted to finish it off.
It’s a fiddly process and it costs a lot, takes too much time for my liking as well.

“What did she..”
I moved really close to the sign and sniffed it.
“..Lemon?.. she used lemon juice!”

How did I never think of that?!
John and I used to use lemon juice to write ‘secret’ messages to each other when we were kids, when they dried they were only visible if you heated the paper by putting it on an exposed light bulb for a minute or two..
I know, it’s stupid, but we were boys playing ‘Spy’ and it was really cool at the time, okay?!

Obviously Trudy played ‘spy’ too.. and never forgot the secret message trick..

She must have used lemon pulp to draw out the runes before the sign was put on the wall.
The process of enchanting would take a bit more power and time then my blood magic to set, but it has the added bonus of leaving no visible trace behind.

The only giveaway that it’s even enchanted is the smell.
That light lemon-y smell won’t go away until the enchantment is broken.

I didn’t even think about it when I came in.
I just dismissed the slight smell as a left over from whatever cleaning products they use around the office!

This whole setup is amazing.

Even the runes are.. weird.
I think she’s trying to make her own runic language?

She’s mixed a few different ones that I can recognise.
There’s a few ‘ormr’, ‘sér’, ‘segir’ and ‘standa’ rune sets from Old Norse.
Mixed in are some ‘Adverto’, ‘Adsuesco’, ‘Assuesco’, ‘Careo’, ‘Credo’ and ‘Dedecus’ rune sets from Latin rune’s too.
The rest seem to be South American, Asian and.. African maybe?

I don’t know many rune languages outside of my favourites sadly, but I should be able to piece together what this thing does from what I know and how it’s laid out.

There’s the ‘Credo’ tied to the ‘Assuesco’ rune.
So that’s Trust tied to familiarity, I can assume the ones in between them are some kind of delay or inversion matrix..

The ‘ormr’ rune means serpent but it’s usually used to show deception.
It’s connected to the ‘sér’ rune in a roundabout way along with the ‘segir’ rune..
So.. Deception of sight and hearing?..

The last ones are related to shame, want and the attraction of attention..
In this kind of layout, even counting in whatever the other random language runes do..

This whole thing is a giant spell used to make people calm, convince them that they can trust the people they see or hear in here and impress upon them a sense of shame if they do something which they think that person would be unimpressed about!

“Trudy you clever bitch..”

THAT’s why I’ve been acting like this!
I’ve been so calm here.
Everything in this office made me feel relaxed, it reminded me of my old school guidance counselor’s office..

They did it on purpose, the whole office is DESIGNED to breed familiarity with anyone who’s been to a school at some point in their lives!

What’s the trigger though?
The only rune I can see that seems completely out of place is the ‘standa’ one.
It’s surrounded by a lot of other language runes I don’t know but I can see that it’s inverted at least..

THE CHAIRS!
‘Standa’ is the Old Norse for ‘to stand’, inverted that’s ‘to sit’!

You sit on the chairs and it triggers!

THAT’s why I calmed down so much and started regretting yelling at Sarah when I sat down!
The sign must have some kind of passive calming effect from looking at it alone, that’s why it’s placed right in the your face when you walk in.. but the chair’s act as an amplifier.

I don’t care if things don’t work out with this AMS stuff or not but I NEED to get Trudy’s contact information.
To hell with her being able to keep up with me, SHE might be able to teach ME some stuff!

My eyes scanned down the wall a little to follow the line of ring runes she’d marked out towards the chairs and settled on my hand for a moment.

The level of magic in my system isn’t too bad at the moment.
My aura looks a lot less full, stressed and glowing at least.

It’s still building back up again though.
I’ve got half an hour tops before I’m back to feeling like I’m bursting with magic at this rate..
Oh well, it was nice while it lasted.
I need to find a solution for it soon but that requires that I get out of here first!

I gave a final glance around the room with my mage sight.
There’s a few enchanted items on the desk but the only thing that really stands out is that stupid ‘Hang in there Baby!’ poster.

I KNEW that thing was dodgy!

A few steps over to it and a sniff told me all I needed to know.
It’s enchanted as well, with lemon juice again.

This time the runes are a lot more standardised, Norse and Latin only.
I can tell what it does at a glance.
If you look at this poster it makes you feel small, less assertive.
You get a feeling of family from whoever is sitting in the chair below it and you feel the need to get their approval.

This office.. this office is a MASTERPIECE!

I didn’t even think.
It’s all so subtle, I didn’t consider that my mood swings could be from outside sources.
I’ve had so many mood swings lately from my awakening that it didn’t even register as a problem honestly..

I feel like I should be annoyed at them for doing this stuff to me but it’s all mostly harmless and they ARE currently on a two-woman mission to find out what the hell the storyteller guy is up to for me.

I can see why they would want to keep newly awakened mages calm and compliant while they’re here as well, just look at how erratic I’ve been for the last few days..

The runes can’t extend into Trudy’s little ‘training room’ though.
I was only in there a short time and my magic started spiking again, the emotions that this office suppressed came pushing back in with ease.

I’ll have to warn Trudy about that when I see her next.
She shouldn’t take anyone into that training room if she’s not SURE how well they react will to her in general without the offices effect or it could be dangerous.

“Okay, enough staring. I need to go.”

I’ll go to Fena’s shop for some research materials and advice, then use her phone to call Sarah and apologise.
The shame may have been magically forced but I can see that I was too harsh with her now at least.

The door to the AMS office shut behind me and I glanced around the empty hallway outside.
I could be nice and try to find my way back out to the reception but I’m a mage, people expect us to skip this little annoyance when we can.

With a squint I focused on the waypoint in the motel across the street from the Hub.
It’s got a special beacon in it that broadcasts throughout the Hub.
I can lock onto it and follow the route it plots back out of here without even leaving warp.
It’s like putting your car in cruise control and following the satnav.. but with magic.

A slightly forceful push of magic down the lines to my feet later I set into a basic warp.
Anything more advanced than that is probably a bad idea with the amount of magic I’ve got at the moment.

There was a bright blue light that blocked out my vision and the world hiccupped.

======

I fell out of warp and literally fell over in the process.

I HATE normal warping, it makes me nauseous.
There’s something fundamentally wrong with tearing yourself apart and throwing your atoms through the air at high speed, suspended in a bubble of magic.

Give me shadow warping any day!
Sure, you have a chance of being intercepted by a lower demon while you’re dropping into a random shadow realm to shortcut from one space to the other, but at least it doesn’t blind you AND you stay mostly in one piece for the whole trip!

“Move along kid, your holding up a party of four mages coming in.”

With a groan I pushed myself back to my feet and gave the waypoint guard an annoyed glance.
He didn’t seem at all bothered with my look and just returned the same blank face you see on all public transport staff who are bored but ready to just do their jobs.

“Exit’s to your left, take three more lefts after that and you will be at the main entrance.”
I didn’t need directions but that’s probably just something he has to say.

My feet carried me over to the door with only a slight wobble.
I’d almost left the room when he spoke again.

“Better hurry kid, your already late for school..”

STUPID UNIFORM!
He must have noticed how messed up my ‘uniform’ is now.
I hardly look ‘ready for school’ at this point, I look more like some kind of apocalypse survivor then a school girl with THIS much damage to my clothes!

My teeth grit hard and I had to resist the sudden urge to turn him into a giant guard-sicle.

In the end I settled for flipping him the bird over my shoulder and marching off with my tattered dignity draped around me like a poorly made cloak.
His laughter followed me for two out of the three left turns I had to take to get out of the motel.

“I hate public waypoints at this time of day..”
The receptionist at the front desk of the motel looked up at me as I walked past and seemed to be trying to give me a sympathetic look.

I didn’t bother acknowledging it, I just want to get out of here as quick as possible now.
..stupid waypoint guard.. stupid uniform..

======

Taking a left from the front of the motel I walked past the entrance to the Hub and carried on along Main Street.
A few blocks up I swung a right by the courthouse and took a short cut across one of the parking lots so I could avoid the Christian ministry on the corner.

After the fifth time they tried to wave me down with leaflets I kind of snapped and told the woman that I was a practicing Wiccan, naturally they didn’t take well to that.
I’ve tried to avoid getting their attention since then.. the last time I walked past the priest was outside and he shot me a nasty look.

Admittedly that was a whole different body ago and I probably have a blank slate with them now, considering I look like an entirely different person.. but that doesn’t mean I’m going to rush over and encourage them to hound me all over again!

A few more blocks up I had to resist the temptation to swing around the supports on ‘Bank of America’ sign on the corner.
I used to do that all the time as a kid when we were walking back to the car from the High street.

One more block, I brushed my hand on the rough wall of the ‘shipping and wireless’ store until I finally eased around the corner onto Fena’s street.

Her shop hasn’t changed, on the outside at least, since the first time I went there.
Which is always reassuring to see, familiarity is comfortable after all.
Fena keeps saying she’s going to change the front displays but she can never decide what to change them to.
Honestly, it really does kind of need updating..

Even I would struggle to believe that a shop, in this day and age, could be charging a hundred dollars for a laptop that looks like it was chiselled from sandstone by cavemen!

======

The bell over the door rang when I opened it.
I was slightly surprised to see that the two male Sib’s weren’t sitting on their ever-present perches behind the front counter.

The whole shop felt deserted.

Normally Lurch comes to the door when the bell rings.
He’s gotten used to me enough now that he doesn’t do his usual ‘big looming scary man’ thing every time I show up, but he still comes to the door anyway.
I think it’s one of his core programmed actions honestly.

Golems have a set of specific reactions they will ALWAYS follow, it’s like the three laws of robotics but without the.. logic?

Some of the worst horror stories that stop non-awakened mages from playing with Golems tend to involve mage’s who design their Golems for ‘self-defence’ and then forget to put the ‘don’t hurt me idiot!’ command into their core or put it a bit too late into the priority list.
The first time they accidentally stub their toes on a table the Golem goes into attack mode to destroy the evil fiend who harmed their master!..
The fact that the ‘fiend’ happened to BE their master doesn’t fit into the Golems logic chain until AFTER they’re done turning said master into a fine paste.
At which point they tend to destroy themselves for harming their master too..

What can I say, magic is complicated, and Golemancy is just one of many fields of study that’s not designed for careless or just plain stupid people..

“Hello?”
I paused for a moment but no-one answered.
That’s really weird, usually there’s at least SOMEONE within hearing range.

I wonder what’s going on?..

It’s probably not good either way..
It’s just been one of THOSE kind of weeks, ya know?

“I’m gonna check through stock for some research materials Fena..”
No-one answered again but I shrugged and made my way over to the back shelves.

It took me a while to learn Fena’s strange filing system for the books back here, I swear she sorts them by smell or something equally weird.
After the third time she had to come rescue me because I got lost in all the randomly placed titles and surprisingly interesting mix of esoteric magics, I ended up just spending a day going over the room while under a memory enhancement charm.

Unless she’s moved something I should pretty much know where all the stock should be right now, it’s only been a few months since I last dropped in and she doesn’t tend to cycle them very often.

“Let’s see..”

‘Powers and counter-powers’
A good guide to innate magic and magical traits.
It should help me work out a bit more information about my new ice magic and that whole ‘being able to run on ice’ thing I did earlier.

‘Elementary Elements’
This is where I got all my references from when I was trying to get a handle on my fire powers.
Edith recommended it.. well.. she threw it at my head when I was about to leave the shop after almost setting fire to her pink fluffy slippers by accident..

That’s about as close as she ever gets to being ‘helpful’ usually, she’s a great source of information when she wants to be and a surprisingly good teacher too but that doesn’t mean she’s not a spiteful old bat about it at the same time..

‘Mind, your own business’
A bit more advanced than the book I used as a reference when Edith was teaching me mind magics.
Written by the same author, judging by his description and dedication on the first page he became a lot more cynical and bitter by the time he made this book.
It should be interesting even if it turns out to be a bust for helping me deal with the past-incarnations that are still filling Ellie’s part of my mind to bursting.

“One more and I’m sorted..”
Where is it?.. I swear it was here last time.

I reached out and grabbed the book that was in the spot I’d expected to find a copy of ‘The Locus Point Compendium’
It’s about as close to a book about ‘Locus points’ as you’re going to get, even if it IS just a load of personal journals from people who have been around them.
Hopefully it’s got something in there about someone blocking off a Locus points ability to vent magic, especially anything about wild magic somehow slipping into the Locus point’s lines like it has in mine.

“..‘Love spells for the lovelorn loser’?”
I feel a bit dirty just from having TOUCHED the cover of that useless drivel..

“There are better books if you want love magic honey. We don’t do love potions or anything though, that’s just too tacky.”
I jolted in surprise at Fena’s voice.

With a single movement I turned to look at her.
For a moment we all just stared at each other.

Then all hell broke loose..

Fena hissed at me angrily and brought her hands up, ready to cast a spell.
“Kinslayer, what are you-”
Rosemary cut across her by pushing her aside slightly and came over to put a gentle arm around my shoulders.

“Hannah sweetie, what are you doing here? I thought you were going to stay in the office?”

She seemed slightly guilty.
If I had to guess, I think she genuinely forgot about me in her rush off for revenge on my behalf.
Even without the AMS office’s poster’s giving me a semi-forced sense of calm and wellbeing from earlier, her hug felt comforting still..

“Hannah?”
Fena looked suddenly lost.
Her arms fell down, out of her previous ready stance, much to my relief.

“Oh yes, that’s her name now. She’s the new awakened I came to you for help with.”

Fena squinted at me hard.
“What’s her true mage name?”

I held a tense breath.
This is the moment of truth, even though I don’t agree with it or even like the name, ‘Arista’ is my true magical name.

Your true mage name is the name used by your very first incarnation, things tend to get complicated if you start using a load of different names over the course of a few centuries.
Plus most awakened mages actually LIKE and feel a close affinity for their ‘true name’.

As always, I’m the exception.

“She started her journey as ‘Arista’ I believe, although-”
Fena didn’t wait for her to finish.
Her hands flew up again, I could feel the beginnings of a pretty major spell building up around her.

“I warned you Kinslayer, the next time you crossed my path I would gut you where you stand!”
My hands came up on instinct to protect my face.

Without conscious effort my magic surged forth.
It took all my precarious control to shift its intent away from the giant spike of ice about to appear and kill Fena, into something more geared towards pure defence.

Rosemary gasped and held on to my shoulders tighter as a dome of thick, crystal clear ice formed up around us cutting off all external sound.

I could see Fena mouth some kind of swear and slam her flaming fist into the ice dome.
A trail of fire followed in her fist’s wake but burned out almost instantly upon contact with the dome.
She drew away quickly and grasped her hand in pain while glaring at me darkly.

If I wasn’t so busy trying to get used to the idea that my last remaining friend just tried to kill me I might have tried to warn her about Edith..

The little old lady was slowly shuffling up behind her, stick at the ready.
It’s amazing how sneaky she can be at times.
From this side of it, I’m pretty amazed she ever manages to sneak up on ANYONE, especially someone with Fena’s annoyingly good sense of hearing…

Fena’s fist came up again, I could see the power building along her fist with my naked eye.
She must be REALLY angry, the magic is trailing along the veins in her forearm as it comes to a stop at the center of her balled fist.

She pulled back with a roar, ready for a second attempt at smashing her way in.

Just before she could let loose with the punch Edith got into position.
With an obviously yelled sentence which I could easily guess to be ‘bad Juju’ she swung down with her Juju stick and clipped Fena with it, right on the top of her head.

Like a puppet with its strings cut Fena fell hard to the floor.

Edith didn’t seem concerned with that though, she huffed to herself and mumbled something then fixed me with a displeased look.
Her wrinkled old hand came up with three fingers raised.
Slowly she ticked them off one by one.

I only JUST managed to understand what she was going to do.
My arms came up and pulled Rosemary down to huddle with me protectively on the floor.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see Edith raise her Juju stick again and smack it hard against my ice dome.

A thin crack formed at the impact point.
Slowly the crack expanded and then quickly spread along the length of the dome, essentially cutting it in half.

With a thundering crash both halves of the dome came crashing down to the floor on either side of us.
On the way down one half crushed a table full of trinkets with its sheer weight and the other destroyed a bookcase on the far wall.

“I be telling that girl, we no’ be fightin’ near the merchandise but is she listenin’?”
Edith seemed completely unshaken by the mess around us or the fact that she just destroyed an ice dome which withstood one of Fina’s most powerful fire techniques, in one hit, seemingly without effort.

“Be sayin’ ya be a wrong’n with fire girl but ya not be listenin’ neither. Ice be bett’a but not too right for ya still..”
She carelessly waved her Juju stick in my general direction making Rosemary squeak in fear and hide behind me slightly.
I can’t blame her, that Juju stick should carry a public health warning!.. and it’s pretty scary how much power Edith can pour through it at times too..

“Edith, what the hell? Is Fina okay?”

She looked over at me and snorted in some kind of amusement.
Her fluffy slippered foot came out from underneath her long flowery dress and, not so gently, kicked Fena in the ribs.
The previously motionless body scrunched up around her stomach and groaned piteously.

“She be fine.”
My glare didn’t seem to get much of a useful response, Edith just glared back at me with her squinted little eyes.

“What ya be doin’ to ya’self girl?”
She shuffled over to my side.

My worried look at Fena’s groaning body was seemingly ignored in exchange for Edith staring at me instead.

She squinted at me hard, and her little eyes flashed for a moment with the unmistakable activation of mage sight.
After a long moment she hissed in a breath between her teeth and looked back up at my face.

“Ya nev’a be borin’ girl, useless t’be sure but never borin’ a’least”
I could feel Rosemary swell up in indignation on my behalf but I’m far too used to Edith and her little quirks to be offended at this point.

Before Rosemary could say anything to her, Edith’s eyes tracked over to her in annoyance.
“Why ya not be sayin’ the girl be the one ya ‘elpin?”

Rosemary seemed to deflate a little under her direct gaze.

I pushed myself forward a step to draw Edith’s attention back to me, for Rosemary’s sake if nothing else.
“Any idea’s how to fix this?”
My hand waved at the fallen halves of the ice dome.
My magic, already refilled to bursting point, flowed eagerly through my fingers in a way that she can probably see with her mage sight on.

Edith gave me a withering look and huffed loudly.

“What ya be tryin’ so far girl?”
Her voice was surprisingly tender for a moment.
It stunned me a little.

“Speak up, I not be a’vin till the powers roam.. useless girl.”
Ah.. that’s better.

“I was just gathering research materials, I tried to divert the ice magic into water-”
Edith cut me off with a withered cackle of amusement.
My teeth grit down a little in annoyance.
“Yes.. I realised my mistake a while ago.”
She doesn’t need to know that it was less than an hour ago..

“Ya be divertin’, ya be needin’ a bett’a medium.”

I sighed and rolled my shoulders a little.
“I figured as much, I can’t come up with a good replacement one though. I only looked into fire magic last time..”

She huffed and waved her Juju stick dangerously close to my nose.

“Ya thinkin’ too right-ways, ya need ta think up!”
It took me a moment to get what she meant.
She’s basically saying I should think ‘outside the box’.

Even I wouldn’t have got that one if she hadn’t said something similar before and Fena explained it to me, to some degree.
I don’t think Fena really understands what those sayings mean either honestly, she just knows what Edith is TRYING to say when using them.

“What else can be connected with ice? It’s frozen water..”
Edith waved her stick one more time and walked past me to slowly pick up a book from the floor.
With a deft flick of her wrist she sent it sailing at my head.
Luckily I’d been expecting as much and had my hands up ready to catch it.

“Page two-hun’red an’ four”
With a mild look of annoyance I started flicking through the book.

It looks like page two-hundred and four has some diagrams about the changing of the seasons and their effects on the life cycle of a rare breed of tree frog used in most sheep husbandry rituals..

Edith didn’t seem impressed by my sarcastically raised eyebrow.

“..ya be useless..”
Her head sunk a little and she released a sigh that sounded honestly disappointed.

“What? I can’t exactly turn Ice into tree frogs, or sheep for that matter.”
She shook her head and her stick waved a little as if she was tempted to smack me with it for some reason.

“Not tha’ frogs girl, the seasons. Do I be havin’ to spell it out for ya?”

The seasons?..
Okay, what about them.
Ice to start with, so Winter..

.. nope.. I’m drawing a blank here..

“Ice be tha’ death of things, ta make way for spring’s new life, ya ig’nant girl!”
Wow.. I think Edith is really losing her temper for once..

“So.. I should make links between Ice and spring?”

Edith’s withered hand came up to squeeze the bridge of her nose as if she had a headache.
A moment later my head whipped to the side, pain blossomed on my cheek and exploded in my head!

Without any form of warning she’d whipped her Juju stick up to smack me with it.

“WHAT THE HELL EDITH?!”
My magic flared, I had a brief moment to panic before it peaked and exploded out from me in a golden wave of power.

..I felt so deliciously empty again..

All my built up magic just SURGED out in that wave, taking the built up pressure inside me with it.
My body shuddered a little at the feeling of it.
As the wash of golden power drifted out to a point that it faded away, the pain in my cheek eased and my new headache followed quickly afterwards.

Behind me I heard Rosemary gasp and before my eyes I could see Edith stand up a little straighter than usual.
To top off all the weirdness, Fena let out a raspy breath and started pulling herself upright with a surprised look on her face.

“There, ungrateful girl! I be doin’ it for ya.”
With an aggravated growl at me Edith shuffled off towards the shops private back area.

I wanted to go after her but the look in her eyes a second ago held me back.
She seemed REALLY annoyed for some reason, as if my failure to understand her was some kind of personal insult.

“Fena! Ya be cleanin’ up ya mess or else’n, an’ NO fightin’ the girl.”
With those last words she slammed the door behind the counter shut and left us all standing there in awkward silence.

Slowly Rosemary raised a hand and cringed a little.
“I’m officially lost, anyone have an idea what just happened?”
I shrugged and shook my head.
Fena shot an annoyed glance at me but shook hers too.

“What I want to know is what I missed after she hit me?”
Fena didn’t need to ask who hit her obviously.. after all, she knows Edith.

I opened my mouth to answer but Rosemary beat me to it.

“You tried to hurt Hannah, so Edith knocked you out, shattered the REALLY impressive ice dome Hannah put up and then started talking to her in that weird way she does.”
It made me wince to acknowledge that Edith talks weird in general, it feels a bit too close to talking behind her back at the moment..
“Then she started quizzing her about how to change her ice powers or something and hit her over the head. Hannah yelled then just EXPLODED with this glorious golden light.. it was beautiful.. before I could react the light hit me and I felt my dodgy elbow stop aching suddenly..”

Fena gave me a curious look for a moment.

“She keeps calling you Hannah.. but you’re not correcting her Kinslayer?”
I huffed and blew a strand of my annoyingly long hair out of my face in the process.

“Can we talk privately for a second Fena?”
She gave me a weird look but after a curious glance to Rosemary she shrugged and waved me over to the front desk.
When we got there she turned sharply and folder her arms across her chest, giving me an impatient eye-roll to complete the look.

“okay.. uh.. Fena.. Something happened and through a chain of events I got turned into a girl by old magic, then forced into a second, more complete awakening that bonded me closer to my past-incarnations.”
Her eyebrow went up in disbelief.
“It changed my element from fire to ice somehow and shifted my magical signature enough that I now come out as ‘Arista’ to any magical means of testing me, which caused problems for me at the Hub and-”

She waved her hand for me to stop talking.
For a long moment she stared at me.
It felt like an eternity before she slowly cocked her hip to the side and gave me an annoyed look.

“..Supposing I believe you, and you’re not the Kinslayer.. who are you instead..?”

My jaw worked for a moment.
I shot a look over at Rosemary who was keeping herself busy reading one of the books that had fallen to the floor from all the mess that had formed in the wake of my broken ice dome.

It’s not TECHNICALLY a secret.
I’m sure someone at the Hub will work it out soon enough, that I was ‘Al’ before my change..
Somehow.. hopefully..

I’ve had some pretty mixed reactions to my change so far though and I REALLY don’t feel up to testing to see if Rosemary is as ‘kind and open minded’ as she seems to be when she finds out that I used to be male, in body at least.
I’ve already got one old lady mad at me at the moment, that’s enough for now!

I leaned a bit closer to Fena and dropped my voice a little before continuing.
“It’s me, Al.”

Slowly Fena’s eyes went wide and her head leaned away from me in shock.
As quick as a flash her expression changed from one of surprise to absolute relief.
Her arms whipped up and pulled me into a tight, desperate hug.

“I thought you were dead!”
Her yell made Rosemary glance over at us but she looked back down at her book quickly to show she wasn’t trying to be nosy.

Fena seemed to notice the unwanted attention anyway, judging by the guilty look on her face and leaned away from me while she continued in a reverent whisper.
“Holy crap Al, what the hell happened? Edith’s tracking crystal went dark. I thought.. we thought you were dead.. well.. Edith wouldn’t admit it but I could tell she believed it too.. and I’m babbling.. and.. I’ll stop now..”
She trailed off with an awkward look.

As if she couldn’t resist anymore she surged forward and pulled me into another tight hug.

“We can’t talk with her here. I’ll tell you about it all later, for now I can say that things were pretty bad but are looking survivable at this point.”
She didn’t look too happy with the idea of waiting for a better explanation but nodded in agreement anyway.

She gave me one more reassuring squeeze and turned us back to go join Rosemary.

“So, what’s going on with the whole ‘littlest school girl’ look?”
I groaned and brought my hand up to my face in frustration.

I should have known she wouldn’t wait long before bringing THAT up..

======

“So.. who do I gut first?..”
I shuffled uncomfortably in my seat.
Fena’s voice has gotten this strange deepness to it the more I’ve explained about the last week or so to her.

While the voice change is worrying, the talking has been kind of a relief for me honestly.

I was never fully open with Fena about my life before.
We were friends, but she never asked me about my life and I never pushed her on hers, it was kind of an equal trade’s deal we had an unspoken agreement about.

She almost slapped me when she found out I’d been going on world-traveling missions for the Hub over the last few years.
Apparently that’s not normal.
Most awakened mages rarely leave their ‘home territory’ according to her, which seems weird to me considering I’ve spent more time in mainland Europe in the last few years then I have in Klamath Falls.

While we’re on the topic of awakened mages, she was pretty pissed that I never told her that I’m the latest incarnation of Arista.
There’s some bad blood between them that seems to really effect Fena just by bringing it up.

She wouldn’t explain what she meant when she called me ‘Kinslayer’ earlier.
Before I could push too much on it she worked out that Edith had known I was the ‘new Arista’ all this time, which sent her off on a rant about her being a sneaky old witch.
I tried to stay out of the firing line on that one by keeping quiet, but privately I could see what she meant..

She demanded to inspect both of my brands.
When she found out that John gave me the first one she swore and glared over at the bookshelves.
He came in to the shop a few days ago apparently and bought a copy of the rare book she had about brands and old magic.

I think he’s trying to find a way out of the one on his cheek that’s stopping him from actively harming me personally.
Fena was more interested in the idea that she should find him somehow and ‘get revenge’ on him for changing me into a girl, more specifically, for leaving me with the young face of her hated enemy.

I tried to calm her down a bit about him with some success.
He’s MY problem, I’m not letting someone else handle him now.
That’s like giving up and admitting that I can’t beat him in his little games without help!

Maybe it’s what little I have left of my ‘macho pride’ showing through but I can’t just let John win like that!

To get her onto a more useful target I told her about the incident with the stone decontamination box and the storyteller.
If I thought she was angry before, it was DWARFED in comparison to her reaction after we looked up some of the old Japanese marriage brands to compare them with my new one.

She pushed me for information on everything, his office, his clothes and just him in general.
She even got to the point of pulling out a copy of ‘Mages through the ages’ and getting me to cast a search spell on it while focused on his looks to find out who he was.
It turns out that things can’t be THAT easy after all, the storyteller must have been wearing an illusion of some kind because his face didn’t show up in any form through the entire book!

That means he’s either not a mage, which is pretty much impossible at this point, or he was lying.. again.

Fena promised to get to work quickly on breaking the brand, or as she called it ‘that sick indignity’ for me.
She also promised that Max would no longer be welcome in her shop on pain of death.

With a little work I even got her to start calling him John, I think she found the idea of passively annoying him like that fun after a bit of thought.
Especially because it was a form of petty revenge I wouldn’t complain about her abusing afterwards.
She even started talking about bypassing the ‘anti-copy’ charms on all her editions of ‘Mages through the ages’ so she could change his name to ‘John-boy’ in them before sale.

We had a laugh at the idea which was a welcome release from the serious and tense atmosphere the conversation had progressively taken on.

I suggested she bring Trudy in on her plans as well, considering Rosemary is involved already but it turns out I’m a bit late on that idea, the only reason Trudy wasn’t in the shop with Rosemary when I got here was that she has her own routes of investigation to use in the hunt to bring the storyteller to justice for me.

“Do you know what’s wrong with Edith?..”
Fena grunted at me curiously.
“..or what she did to my ice magic that made it suddenly become some kind of big healing spell?”
She shrugged and shot me a look that said I should be able to work it out already.

“She’s been worried about you. She doesn’t act like it but she does care you know?”
I shifted in my seat uncomfortably again.

For a chair that’s THIS plush and soft, I seem to be doing that a lot at the moment.

“With the ice magic, I think she linked the idea of ‘death from winter’ with ‘renewal from spring’.”
She frowned and stared thoughtfully at the celling for a second.
“That’s my best guess at least, when she calms down a little I’ll ask her for you but it must be a pretty strong connection she made to cause that much healing..”
Her frown became a bit more pronounced.
“You healed multiple people at once, I didn’t even know that was possible with just one spell.”
She stared at her hands thoughtfully for a moment.
“I don’t think I have enough raw power to pull it off, even if I knew how..”

Her head cocked to the side and she squinted at me hard.

I don’t think I twitched guiltily or anything but she must have seen something because she groaned and put her hand over her face.
“There’s more isn’t there?”
My shoulders shrugged and I pulled my knees up to my chest a little, tugging my tattered tartan skirt back over them.

“I.. I’m a Locus point too..”
She sucked in a breath and fixed me with an annoyed look.

“..You would be wouldn’t you.. why can’t you just be normal for once Al?”

I almost laughed at that, I’ve asked myself that same question a fair few times over the years.
“Even with that, your core must have been nearly completely drained with that explosion of healing magic..”
My shoulder shrugged again awkwardly.

She watched me, waiting calmly for me to crack and tell her everything she wanted to know.

“Fine.. I felt pretty empty for a moment, then the magic started pouring back in. After about twenty seconds I was back to my normal full level. From there I just keep gaining more power in my lines..”
She squinted at me hard and her eyes flashed with mage sight.

She seemed almost hesitant to touch me now that she could see just how full my lines are.
I can’t blame her, I was pretty scared of them myself at first, especially the wild magic in there.

Hell, I’m STILL scared of the wild magic in there..

“We need to get that second brand off you as a priority, it can’t be healthy to have THAT much magic in your body just floating around.”
She seemed to consider something for a moment and nodded to herself.
“Can you get angry for me? Angry enough to set off your magic?”
Her eyes didn’t leave my body, the glint of mage sight still obvious.

“I’m not exactly good at controlling my emotions at the moment.. I..”
Fena cut across me and gave me a worryingly feral smile.
Her wrist came up and did a weird little flick maneuver.

“Just do it Arista, you incompetent Kinslaying bitch.”
My stomach dropped out at her words.

I felt the pain and loneliness hit home all over again.
She really hasn’t forgiven me.. I didn’t even do anything and she hates me!

I hate this, I hate Arista!
She’s ruining everything!

Fena tried to hold my shoulders, she was mouthing something but I couldn’t hear the words.
My magic bubbled up eagerly to be used.
I wrenched my arms free from her grasp and in one motion my magic exploded out from me again.

A golden halo of light formed up around us, my skirt seemed to mend itself from all the damage it received earlier before my eyes.
Fena gasped and threw a hand up to her chest in surprise.

I could hear things again.
For just a moment I rode the pleasurable waves given off by my empty core but quickly, far too quickly, I could feel the magic pouring back in again.

Finally I got a handle on myself and found Fena holding me in a tight hug.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry..”
She had her head buried in my hair so her voice was slightly muffled.

I moved a little and she quickly pulled back to stare at me with teary eyes.
“I’m sorry Al, I didn’t mean for that to happen. I cast a weak auditory illusion on you to get a reaction and it went haywire for some reason, you started freaking out, before I could do anything your magic just..”

My eyes scanned around us.

The old wooden flooring of the shop around us seemed to have gained a perfectly formed circle of wood which looked almost brand-new, expanding out from where I was sitting..
Come to think of it, the chair I’m sitting on feels stiffer too, as if the padding in it has lost some of the comfortable wear that makes it normally so squishy..
“Holy crap..”

Fena grunted and gave me another squeeze.
“You can say that again..”
She seemed slightly distracted, struggling to understand something.

“I don’t think healing is what your magic is doing.. I have no idea what Edith did but that was far too powerful to be just healing.”
She waved her hand around us uncertainly, then brought it up to cup together with her other one at her chest.
“Just LOOK at this place, even your clothes are good as new..”

“..at least it doesn’t hurt anyone like the ice could have.”
She seemed reluctant to agree with me but nodded anyway.

My eyes looked away from her awkwardly while she seemed to go deeper into thought, eventually they settled on the old clock in the corner.

Ah, hell!
Is that really the time?

“I know this has been a lot to handle and stuff, and I REALLY appreciate your help Fena but I need to get moving. With this change and storyteller’s interference I’m stuck living with my mum again for now, if I’m not back soon she’s going to seriously lose it.”
Fena looked up at me with a slightly lost look but nodded in understanding anyway.

“Can I borrow your phone? I need to get a lift with Sarah.”
..and apologise to her for this morning..

After a moment Fena seemed to realise I was talking again, whatever part of my last burst of magic she’s thinking about must be pretty major to leave her so dazed.
“Sure, it’s behind the counter as always..”
I smiled at her and she weakly smiled back, her hands cupping slightly harder at her chest.

“Thanks”

I made my way over to the counter.
Before I could reach the phone, the little door behind it leading to the private back rooms of the shop opened and Edith grumpily pushed her way out of it while staring at me intensely.
I froze like a rabbit in a car’s headlights.

“Ya be needin’ this. Come back when ya done, I be ‘elpin’ ya.. useless girl.”
She tossed a canvas, over the shoulder style, shopping bag to me and then turned back around to shuffle through the door again, closing it tightly behind her.

I stared at the bag in my arms worriedly for a while.
She didn’t seem as angry as earlier but who knows with Edith..

Carefully I eased the bag open and let out a surprised gasp at its contents.

The bag’s full of stuff!
It feels light as a feather though, it must be one of the expanded bags they sell in the Eugene ‘uptown mages market’.
I didn’t know they even sold these in the shop?..

Inside I could see a few different books, some unmarked boxes, what looks like an incense burner and a lot of cloth for some reason.

A glance at Fena didn’t help, she just shrugged at me with that same, slightly lost, look on her face.

Oh well, I’ll check it out later in my room.
I need to hurry before mum blows a fuse because I’m late.

The phone was in the same place as usual.
I dialled Sarah’s phone from memory.

It gave four rings before she picked up.

“Hello?”
Her voice sounded a bit strained for some reason.

My mouth wouldn’t move for a moment.
I wanted to just shout ‘I’m Sorry’ at her and then hang up.
It would be so much easier then what I’m going to face on the ride home instead..

“Hey Sarah.. can you come pick me up from Fena’s shop?.. I need a lift to mum’s place.”
My voice didn’t shake too much but I sounded far from sure of myself, even to my ears.

Sarah sniffed loudly into the phone and made a sound of agreement.
“I’ll be there soon, meet me outside.”
Without another word she hung up.

I felt like a total heel.
It’s pretty obvious she’s been crying just from her voice.
I can’t think of anything else that may have caused her to cry at the moment, which leaves me as the source..

I didn’t mean to upset her so much.
I was so geared up this morning, it feels like a lifetime ago.

I know she’s hurting because of my change too.
We just handle it in different ways.
I lash out when I’m angry, it’s something I picked up while working for the Hu.. well, working for whoever it was that made me THINK I was working for the Hub at least..

Sarah internalises her anger a lot.
She makes jokes and treats the problem as something unimportant so she doesn’t have to face it, in case she loses control.
For such a free spirit, Sarah’s such a control freak.
She even puts me to shame at times, at least I know when to let something go.. most of the time anyway..

I don’t know what I’m going to say to her.
It’s obvious we need to talk about this.
If we don’t then we’re going to end up hating each other for no real, valid reason.

I don’t WANT to be arguing with Sarah.
She’s the one person I trust above all others.
How could I not?
She’s my other half, my twin.

For a moment Theodora’s words came echoing back in my head.
‘Your other half will hurt you, she will cause you more pain than you have ever experienced.. it’s Sarah’s right to do so, a heart of a heart’
I shook my head hard and silenced the memory quickly but I couldn’t shake off the unease I felt from it.

I don’t WANT to hurt Sarah, I don’t want her to hurt me either, especially if she has a valid reason to do it in revenge somehow..

..What am I doing?..

It was THEODORA!
She’s not right, she can’t be right!
She’s insane, she was just spouting off random things she knew would get a reaction from me.

She’s always been like that, doing things just to get a reaction.
I can’t let her offhand little ‘prophecy’ act rule my life!
I don’t even believe in that mystic crap!

I’m going to get in the car, tell Sarah I’m sorry, then she’ll understand and we can move on like we used to.

Just because that two-bit, perverted soothsayer in my head decided to start spelling out my doom and gloom doesn’t mean I have to listen to it!
She’s probably not even right anyway, and I’ll prove it!
I’ll apologise to Sarah and everything will be fine again..

..Why does it feel so unlikely when I say it like that?..

I shook my head a few times to clear away all the mixed up worried thoughts.
It seems like I’ve gotten better at shaking myself out of it when I drop into thought like that now.
It’s probably got something to do with me accepting the ‘victims’ into my head, the girls Ellie let out.

“Fena, I’m gonna grab those books I was looking for earlier. Can you ring them up for me before I go?”

She seemed to jump at my voice.
Her hand quickly flicked down to her waist, away from her chest, as if she’d been caught doing something she shouldn’t be doing.
She nodded her head furiously and quickly walked over to the counter.

I ambled over to the wreckage at the back of the shop.

It’s going to take her a while to fix this stuff up again.
I’m a little surprised she doesn’t have it all enchanted with strength runes or something, it would have saved a lot of hassle if she had.

The books I dropped are easy to find at least..
The ice dome pieces fell on either side of me and Rosemary so the back wall is mostly untouched.
My little pile of thick books was still sat waiting for me by the rear shelves I’d been searching through for the Locus Point book earlier.

I scooped them up and awkwardly carried them over to the counter.

You’d think I’d be used to carrying big piles of books by now but with my new body came a new center of balance.
While most of the problems I SHOULD be having with it are countered nicely by the thousands of years of experience I have available on how this body works, none of my easily accessed past-selves was THAT into books, so carrying so many of them is a new motion I don’t automatically have some kind of muscle memory built up for.
It’s similar to my problems with the feeling of water falling on me from the shower, it’s a new experience that I can’t just rely on their past-knowledge to help me get used to quickly.

Fena flipped each book over casually and dropped them into the bag that Edith gave me when she was done.
For some reason at the last one she shot me an amused look for a moment but didn’t say anything else before dropping it in with the others.

“That will be two-hundred and four dollars Al. Are you paying by cash or card?”
I opened my mouth to answer and then froze.

She seemed to read my face pretty well, judging by her amused huff.

“No money I take it?”
I cringed and shot her an apologetic look.

“No money, no card, no wallet in general. I think I left it at mums place this morning.”
Fena sniggered a little at my frustration.
“It’s this stupid skirts fault. Why can’t they just put pockets in them? This is why I prefer jeans..”

She leaned against the wall behind the counter and gave me a slightly sympathetic knowing look in return for my rant.

“I’ll put the books on your tab for now Al, I know you’re good for it. Can I suggest getting yourself a purse of some kind soon?”
Her lips twitched in amusement.
“Especially if you’re going to insist on running around looking like you’re skipping out of some private school all the time..”
I growled at her in warning and gave my miraculously repaired, tartan skirt an irritated tug.

“I didn’t CHOSE to wear this Fena, I h-”
She leaned forward and rested her chin on her palms.
“I was joking Al, keep calm.. or don’t actually, maybe this time when your magic goes off you’ll fix the loose floorboards behind the counter for me.”
Her tight lipped smile was slightly infectious and I couldn’t help but return it with one of my own.

Hopefully she doesn’t actually think too hard on that idea, I don’t need her intentionally pissing me off every time I visit from now on just so she can get free repairs done or a general healing spell out of it.

“Fena.. can.. since my change, I’ve been going by Hannah instead of Al.. It fits better, could you..”
I didn’t want to finish that sentence.

It was hard enough admitting, aloud, that I preferred being called Hannah over my old name.
At least I didn’t have to tell her that it’s always felt better, ever since Sarah gave the name to me.

That’s a secret I don’t think I’m willing to share with anyone anytime soon..
I think Sarah might know but she’s never openly made a big thing about it so I’m not sure on that one.

It might not completely be my fault.
Even with all the female voices in my head being sealed away at first, they still had an effect on my psyche as I grew up, I doubt people would react well to knowing how weird I really am though..
Being turned into an Arista clone is bad enough.
Now I don’t have the plausible deniability of blaming Sarah for ‘making’ me dress up for her sake.

With mum pushing me to ‘be a Lady’, whatever the hell that means, and John pushing me to be.. HER as well..
I’m getting so stressed out because it’s not JUST them and THEIR want’s I’m fighting against to stay sane.. I’m fighting myself too..

The feeling has only gotten worse over the years, I had a handle on it before because of my male body but now.. it’s slipping out of my control.
I woke up this morning in the monstro-nighty to go have my blind, sensationless shower and I actually enjoyed the feel of the fluffy pink thing slipping over my legs as I made my way to the bathroom.

I caught myself playing with my hair in the mirror too.
Just a little bit, just pushing it behind my ears so it looked right.. but that’s just it.
I shouldn’t CARE about that sort of thing, that’s not a thought I should have!

I’m not stupid enough to think being female innately makes me want to be this feminine little piece of fluff that cares too much about her appearance or something.. but it’s making the thoughts I always used to have when pretending to be Sarah come back too much, too easily.

My body was my break from those thoughts before, it was the cold shower I could use to shut them up quickly.
Now.. now my body is BUILT for that kind of thing.
People will EXPECT me to look nice, to care about my hair, to wear the frilly, fluffy monstro-nighty!

I’m fighting to not lose myself with all that’s been happening, but I can already tell I’ve lost some things.

I’m far more emotionally fragile then I was, I spent four years hunting down the worst magic-abusers and demonic monsters the world could throw at me.
I’ve faced more dark, insidious magic then most people do in their entire lives and I BEAT them!
.. but I can’t stop myself from having mood swings now..

I can’t stop myself from drifting off in thought constantly, my mind keeps moving from one topic to the next as if it’s SEARCHING for things that will tug at my emotions.

It’s happening right now!

I was asking Fena to just use my new name, that’s all.
That’s not even that strange considering the circumstances but it’s set me off like this!

I might seriously need some help here.. I’m not sure I can handle all of this alone for once.
There’s no-one who I can turn to though, no-one who can really UNDERSTAND just what the hell I’m going through!

I’m weird again.
In a world of magic, monsters and fae folk.. I’m the weird one.
..Again..

======

Someone shook my shoulder, jolting me back to the real world.
Fena was giving me a worried look.

“A.. Hannah, are you okay?”
I sniffed a little and pulled my face into a reassuring smile for her, at least as close as I could get to one at the moment.
I’m being weird again.
I need to stop that..

“I’m-”
My brand burned a little in warning.

I’d forgotten about that.
No saying I’m fine when I’m obviously not..

“I think I just need to get some rest. Today’s been a busy day, ya know?”
She didn’t seemed convinced by that.
I pushed my reassuring smile up to maximum and grabbed the bag off the counter in a rush.

“Thanks for putting this on my tab Fena. I’ll drop in with the cash at some point in the next few days. I’ve got to go, Sarah’s probably waiting outside.”
With quick steps I crossed the shop floor and pulled open the door before she could voice some kind of disagreement.

“Al..”
I winced as I heard her slightly hurt tone but carried on walking, pretending that I didn’t hear her speak.

My weirdness is causing too many people I care about to call after me in that tone of voice lately.
I can’t.. I need to get some kind of hold on it before I mess up everything beyond repair.

The shop door shut behind me with a ring of the bell.

Across the street I could see Sarah’s old car parked up.
The paint on her wheel arches is showing signs of rust again..

She wasn’t looking at me, she seemed to have her head resting on the steering wheel.
Her position was making her hair fall across her face so I couldn’t make anything out without getting closer.

With a deep breath for strength I pushed one Mary Jane covered foot in front of the other and started moving towards her car.

..I really don’t want to have this conversation right now..

It's usually hard to pick up the pieces, we tend to think that some things would take a miracle to be repaired. Events unfold including but not limited to: A purring Betty (an amazing thing considering her age) And Hannah gets to enjoy venting, in more ways then one.

“Hey Sare..”

My voice was just a little bit shaky but I think I covered it well.
Sarah’s head shot up the moment I opened the door and she’s staring at me with wide, wet eyes.

I barely managed to get my butt in the car seat before she was reaching across to pull me into a tight hug.

She mumbled something into my neck but I couldn’t understand it at first.
After a moment her head shifted and she sighed heavily.
“I’m so sorry, this is all my fault..”

My hands automatically came up to pat her back but I was a bit lost for words.
It feels like I’ve come into this conversation half way through, AND from the wrong end of it.

“You didn’t do anything Sare? I was gonna come begging forgiveness from you. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that..”
She squeezed me a little tighter and let off a hollow laugh into my shoulder.

“We need to talk. How does lunch at the flat sound?”

I still felt a little thrown off by her apology but lunch doesn’t sound bad right now.
I can pick up a few of my things from the flat while we’re the-
Oh.. yeah..

“I can’t. Mum’s gonna be waiting for me to get back from ‘Gladstones’..”
Sarah’s face mirrored my cringe at the idea of going back to mum right now.
It’s pretty obvious there’s something big going on that I’m missing details on, we really need to get out in the open at the moment..

“Two seconds, I’ll call her.”
She leaned away from me and scooped up her mobile from the hand-free kit on her dashboard.
My hands came down to nervously fiddle with the hem of my, now repaired, tartan skirt.

For some reason the act of fiddling with the cloth in my fingers calmed me down a little.
I’ll have to check with Trudy to make sure there’s no after-effects from the enchantments she has in the AMS office, I’ve never been one to fiddle with my hands before.

Especially with a skirt..

Admittedly I’ve not worn knee-length skirts very often in the past, so it could just be me.
Most of the skirts I ended up wearing while doing ‘favours’ for Sarah or while on a mission were either longer formal things, longer summer things or much shorter ‘distraction’ things.

I heard the call pick up and mum’s muffled voice from Sarah’s phone but couldn’t make out what she was saying.
My hands drifted down a little and tugged my knee-high socks up a bit better, the left one was sliding down compared to the right one.

“Hey mum.. Yeah, I’m good.. Tor’s fine too..?”
Sarah shot me a confused look.
I shrugged and mouthed ‘later’ to her.

She nodded back and refocused on the call.

“I’ve got Hannah with me.. Sorry, I’ve got Ari with me.”
She winced a little.
I don’t blame her, I hate that name too.

“We’re going to drop around to my flat for a bit, I think I have some old clothes she can have and..”
Her voice dipped down as if she was trying to whisper something out of my hearing range.
“..I think she’s having some boy-trouble. I should be a good sister and help her out ya kno-“
Sarah’s eyes went impossibly wide and she slowly turned to face me with worry.

“uh..no.. she’s not mentioned any name’s yet. I’ll see what she thinks about this ‘Max’ if I get the chance..”
I winced but nodded in answer to her unasked question.

Her shoulders sank and she shook her head a little in disbelief.

“That’s great, I’ll drop her home in time for dinner. Is it okay if I stay too? It’s been ages since I last had one of your dinners..”
Despite her obvious shock at Max’s uninvited appearance into the conversation, and my life in general, Sarah’s lips curved up a little in a smile.
I think she really HAS missed a lot of the little stuff with mum, like having dinner at home every once in a while.

“Great, I’ll talk to you later then mum.. love you too.”

With a sigh she hung up and rested her head on the steering wheel for a moment.
Finally she sucked in deep breath and shot back up to give me a pretty unconvincing grin.

“So.. been a girl a few days and already got yourself a suitor huh?”
I cringed a little.

Her smile slipped back into a more serious look.
“Tell me everything, hopefully by the end of it you can tell me something that will stop me from beating that little shit to death the moment I see him..”
She flinched a little and shuddered.
“I’m only hoping for that much because I’m pretty sure he can just magic me out of existence.. or whatever you mages do to people who annoy you..”
My mouth twitched in a slight smile but it didn’t last.

That really isn’t the kind of topic I can laugh about at the moment, even if I have calmed down a bit since this morning.

“Well, for a start he can’t directly hurt me anymore. I got a brand on him while I was leaving the temple with Tor, he’s more of an annoyance at this point than anything else..”
Sarah sighed and pulled me into a relieved hug.

Her hands came up to gently stroke the ends of my, now far too long, hair comfortingly.

“Start from the top Han. The last I saw you seemed okay, a bit flustered from shopping obviously but nowhere near how you were this morning.. even Mum was acting surprisingly nice about everything at the time too.”
She obviously knew what she was getting into the moment I open my mouth, I don’t need much of a push to start ranting when it comes to Max..

She leaned away from me enough that she could turn the key to start the car and she pulled us out onto the street slowly but her eyes kept flicking over to me with worry.

With a deep breath I started.
I’ve needed to get a lot of this off my chest to someone, I told Fena a lot earlier but there are some things I’d only ever tell Sarah..
She’s pretty much the only person I would trust with everything that goes on in my head, let alone being someone who would have even the slightest chance of understanding it all.

“Well it started with me taking a shower..”

======

We pulled up in Sarah’s parking spot outside the flat a bit too sharply.

Her’s knuckles were white on the steering wheel and her face was tight with anger.
There were a few times, particularly when I told her about John slipping himself into the Martials family and what I’d found out about the brand storyteller put on me, where I thought she was going to plough us off the road with her driving.
She’s not the safest of drivers as it is, let alone when she’s this angry.

“So.. just so I’m clear..”
Her head slowly turned to watch me.

For some reason it feels like she should have a twitch forming in her eye with the forced pleasant look she’s got stretched on her face.

“The bastard that turned you into a teenage girl is now living next-door and stalking you. Mum’s convinced I’m practically married to Tor, she’s also convinced that you fancy Max, John, whatever his name is.. she’s convinced you fancy him.. on top of that your magic is so messed up that a simple spell gave you super-model worthy hair, also mum convinced you to wear that stupid outfit to the Hub today.”

I opened my mouth to argue.
There was no convincing involved, she just made me wear it!

..okay.. maybe I could have stood up to her a bit more but it’s been a stressful few days!
I was barely awake and she was REALLY determined that I should wear it..

“On top of all THAT, you found out that this ‘storyteller’ character gave you a marriage brand that’s made your magic even MORE unstable, not to mention him having placed it being completely illegal.. THEN, just to put the icing on the cake, you have two, honest to god, supposedly mythical warrior women on the warpath hunting him down for you and Fena almost killed you.”

My finger came up to argue the point but I slowly dropped it and closed my mouth after a moment’s consideration.
There’s not a single point there I can actually argue with..
Hearing someone else describe it really puts things in perspective honestly.

..Man, my life SUCKS..

Sarah’s death-grip on the steering wheel eased and she started getting things together to get out of the car.

She paused for a second to sigh deeply to herself.
“I really messed up this time Han..”
My eyebrow perked up in curiosity.

She shook her head and gestured towards the flat, basically saying ‘not here’.
I nodded, following her out of the car to go inside, instead of questioning her further.

This feels like the kind of conversation that would be better over a cup of coffee while sitting on our sofa..

======

“Okay..”
Sarah huffed to herself and took a sip of her coffee.

“Okay.. I messed up Han. When they debriefed me on your condition in the medi-bay I was given strict guidelines on what I should and shouldn’t do with you. I agreed obviously, it’s the only way they would let you out of there anytime soon, and we both know how bad you are with hospitals..”

A little smirk formed on my lips.

I’ve never been good at being a patient.
Even when I was little and I got a cold, I’d end up trying to go play in the woods outside while running a high fever instead of resting.
Mum ended up cuffing me to her with a long chain to stop me leaving the house when she was home looking after us on those days, it got THAT bad.

It’s one of the few times where Sarah would be the quiet one and I was the annoying little hyperactive bouncy ball of energy.
I just tend to feel better moving around while I’m ill usually, being all cooped up makes me feel worse from the start.

It’s kind of odd I slept so much the other day after using so much blood magic actually.
Usually I can’t sleep when I feel that ill.
Last time it happened I ended up sitting up for three days straight coming up with new enchantment formula’s until I felt better.

Sarah smiled at me with a bit of a pained look to her face.

“With everything that happened with mum I completely spaced on the guidelines.. I kind of got caught up having mum back, ya know?”
I nodded, much to her relief.

I know what it’s like to get caught up with mum being nice again AND I saw how well they were getting on the other day too..
I doubt I could have done much better in remembering other things in the same situation.

Her smile slipped and she winced after a moment to gather herself.

“Han.. your messed up.. your magic is just WRONG at the moment and your brain..”
Her hands fiddled with her coffee a little nervously.
“The head nurse at the medi-bay didn’t want to let me take you home. She said you were just on the edge of having a full psychotic episode, she said your magic was off the charts and still climbing.”
Her hands fiddled again.
“When you woke up I figured you were acting normally, ya know? I figured she was just exaggerating or something.. you seemed fine to me..”

Her head dipped down and her shoulders shook a little.

“I’m sorry Han..”
Her head came up to stare at me with a broken look in her eyes.
“She told me I should stay with you. That you needed someone watching you constantly.. someone who could take you into the Hub at the first sign of trouble.”
Her chin wobbled dangerously.
“I.. If I’d known you were going to your room to meditate, to try and sort out what was wrong with your head, I would have stopped you and rushed us back to the Hub.. but I wasn’t thinking.”
The hand holding her coffee was trembling too now.
“Her words didn’t even come back to me until I was back here, later on that night.. and I shrugged it off again, like an idiot, thinking that you hadn’t called or shown any problems yet, ya know?”

Her head dipped down to stare at her hands again.

“I forget sometimes, despite how it seems, that you’re not immortal.. you’re not some vengeful guardian angel that always knows what to do and is always there to save me.. Your my sister..”
Her chin gave up all pretence of stability and she shuddered hard against the sofa, almost spilling her coffee in the process.
“You needed help Han.. medical help.. I should have been there for you and I wasn’t.. I convinced myself you were fine an-”
Her voice trailed off into a higher pitch which finally settled into a pained whine as she burst into tears and dived across the sofa to hug me, sending both of our coffees flying across the floor.

“I’m sorry.. I knew from the moment you came stomping out of the house that something was wrong. I tried to cheer you up, I thought.. I HOPED that it was just you being grumpy about the uniform and whatever had happened to your hair but..”
Her cheek nuzzled against mine, the same way she used to do when we were kids.
“I’m sorry..”

My hands came up around her and gave her a tight squeeze in return.

“You don’t need to get this upset over it Sare.. I’m fine now..”
She grunted and shoved her wet face deeper into my hair.

Who knew, this stupid fluffy mass on my head would apparently be useful for something after all?
It seems she finds the annoying loose curls on my head to be a comfortable hiding place for her tears at least..

“I should have-”
I leaned away from her a little and put a finger to her lips making a ‘shh’ sound.

“Sare, I won’t pretend I’m not worried about what you’ve told me. I’ve noticed similar things myself already.. I think we need to set up a meeting with one of the magi-medics at the Hub to get a full run down soon.. but I don’t blame you.”
She opened her mouth to argue but I pushed my finger against her lips a bit harder to stem her words.
“You just said you forget that I’m only human sometimes, that I make mistakes and need help too.. well don’t forget YOUR human as well.. we all make mistakes Sare. As it is, I think I’ve got a pretty good handle on the problems now.”

Her mouth opened again and when my finger didn’t push down to stop her she actually spoke.
“You seem a lot more stable then you were this morning.. what changed?”

I smirked at her and pulled my hand away from her lips to push back my annoying hair arrogantly.
“I’m just amazingly gifted and fixed myself..”

It started small but I could hear it easily.
Sarah made a little ‘snerk’ noise in the back of her throat.
Without any further warning she started laughing.

It was probably more from relief at me being able to mess about after such a serious conversation but her laugh was infectious enough to set me off too.
Her laugh can always set me off, I’m tempted to say it’s a twin thing but I think it’s more of an ‘us’ thing honestly.

“Oh great and powerful Witch of Oz..”
She didn’t finish the line but she didn’t need to, we both laughed a little more anyway.

After watching the Wizard of Oz as kids we had a little in-joke that, whenever one of us did something stupid, we were the scarecrow and had to ask the ‘wise one’ for a brain to make up for it.
It’s been a long times since either of us has brought that up..

I can’t help but feel kind of nice knowing that we can still do silly stuff like that.
For far too long my interactions with Sarah have been a bit too tense and grown up, normally because I only tended to see her when she was in danger or I was in a rush to get to a new mission..

Come to think of it, this last week is probably the most time we’ve spent together in one go for a fair few years..

Our laugher eased naturally but we were both left with warm smiles our faces.
“Seriously though, I managed to find a balance for what was going on in my head a few days ago and with the AMS peoples help today I worked out what’s been going on with my magic lately too, it’s not good but it’s manageable at least.”

I’m kind of glad Rosemary and Trudy’s office has that ‘calming’ rune system all over it.
Without that, I might not have been calm enough to notice what my magic was doing after I vented it all..
I’m sure I would have worked it out at some point, probably when I went to see Fena an..

“Oh.. and Edith did something weird, she kind of fixed my ice magic problem at the same time as making it easier for me to use up my excess magic quickly.”

I could see the curiosity in Sarah’s eyes right away.
She’s always been a bit in awe of Edith’s whole ‘secretive old wise woman of few words’ act.
The one that works so well on a lot of people.. until you actually get to know her for the head hitting, ‘Bad Juju’ yelling, insane little yoda that she is at least..

The idea that I got help from Edith instead of Fena at the shop probably helps too, those two STILL don’t like each-other for some reason.

“Can I see?”
My smile got a bit wider.
I don’t fully understand what Edith did yet but how can I resist showing off for Sarah?
Especially when emptying my body of all this built up magic feels SO good at the moment..

“Hold on to your seat. It’s gonna get bright for a second.”
She actually took me at my word for some reason, her hands reached down and took a tight grip onto the sofa, just in case.

It took a bit of effort for me to bring up what I needed.
Like before, it’s not exactly hard to get my magic to respond at the moment, getting the excess magic in my lines to follow after it isn’t hard either.
For some reason the change from ice magic to whatever it is Edith’s done to convert it into this pseudo-healing magic thing I have now isn’t an instinctive change, if I’m doing it manually like this at least.

I guess.. that’s the difference between my attempts at mind magic and her mastery of it?

While it was obvious in the shop earlier that, while under stress where my magic will spike, I’ll instinctively let off a blast of this stuff.. I think she somehow made the link so that it takes actual concentration for me to do it on purpose.

On the plus side, that means I get to use ice magic still if I want to!
On the downside it means I have to put a bit of mental effort in to do this sort of thing consciously.
Overall, it’s probably a fair trade off.

I’m pretty happy with it at least.
Imagine if I had absolutely no natural offensive spells left?

Magic is magic but in a fight most mages fall back on their natural element, it can pretty much be cast with a thought and comes out with a lot more force than a spell using the same amount of magic would offer.

I really owe Edith for helping me like this, even if she was in a bad mood over it all for some reason.

My magic cycled around my body while I built myself up to pushing it out.
It’s a really weird feeling to describe, I can feel that there’s a kind of ‘mental switch’ I can throw to release all that built up power at my fingertips in one go but finding the switch is awkward at the moment..
If I had to give an analogy I’d say it’s like trying to find a light switch on a wall in a dark room.
I know it’s there, I just can’t quite get-

THERE it is!

With a wave of, what felt like, cold wind ALL of the swirling magic inside me surged outwards in every direction.
It passed through my skin without any effort at all, going out in a roughly dome like shape through Sarah and flooding over the whole flat.

oh.. ohhh that feels good..
..Ohh..

======

“Han?.. Han are you..”

Sarah’s shaking woke me up from my post-orgasmic daze.
I’m feeling too good right now to call it anything else.
If anything THAT one felt even better than the last few times I’ve pushed all my magic out instinctively.

My head flopped sideways to rest on my shoulder and I offered Sarah a goofy smile instead of speaking.

“What the hell did you DO Han?.. that.. you fixed my sofa!.. and the floorboards.. and the lampshade in the corner.. an-”
My floppy arm came up and gently tried to stop her talking but fell short for some reason.
I let my arm fall completely and leaned hard into her body instead with a happy snigger.

“..are you.. drunk?”
That made me snigger even harder and rub my face into her stomach a bit more.

This feeling is so good.
I’m so empty, and I fixed things..
I didn’t break or hurt anyone for once.. and it felt SO good..

“Han..”
Sarah shifted how she was sitting on the sofa and somehow managed to move me over so I was practically sitting in her lap.
I almost fell face-first off the couch in the process but she caught me at the last second with an annoyed huff.

“.. what am I gonna do with you, huh?”
I sniggered again and tried to lean back into her instead of answering.
She doesn’t sound angry, more amused and exasperated than anything.

My head came to rest on her chest, my too long hair fanned out around me perfectly, as always.
I can’t even bring myself to be annoyed at how the ‘perfect hair’ spell is still lingering in my system at the moment.

A hand came up to play with a piece of it.
It took me a moment to realise that it was really MY hand.. I could feel the hair passing through my fingers.

Sarah’s hand came up and carefully cupped mine to bring it back down to my lap.
“Com’ on Han, why don’t you take a little nap yeah? You’ll feel better afterwards I promise.”

..Feel better..
Is that even possible?
A nap though.. naps are good..

Just thinking about taking a nap made me yawn wide.

Sarah let out an awkward breath that tickled my ears by moving my hair.. my long soft hair..
“That’s it Han, let’s have a nice nap and you’ll feel better when you wake up okay?”

I rolled my head to snuggle into her chest a bit more in response.
“mmm-Nr..”
That’s about as much communication as I feel up to at the moment.
My mouth doesn’t want to cooperate for some reason.

“Com’ on Han.. nap time..”

With one last unsuccessful shuffle to bring my legs up onto the sofa I let out a contented sigh and settled in to sleep.
Sarah’s hand feels so nice stroking my hair like that..

======

It’s warm.

It’s really comfortable and warm.
I don’t want to move but I really need to pee and my head feels weird.

My eyes opened and promptly shut again with a groan.
It’s daylight out.
It doesn’t feel like it should be daylight out..

“Awake, are you?”
Sarah sounded really amused for some reason.

“Mmm-nr..”
I rubbed my face into the soft sofa.
Hopefully she got the meaning of my words from that..

Her hands gripped my shoulder and rolled me over so I was face up suddenly.
I groaned and cracked one eye open to give her a beady glare.

“Close enough..”
She had a smug smile on her face for some reason too.
“I should thank you, ya know?”

I grunted and tried to roll back over but she wouldn’t let me.

“Whatever you did fixed my water-heater, I just managed the longest shower I’ve ever had in this place without running low on hot water even once.”
She seemed happy about that, it took me far too long to work out why.
I’m not quite running on all cylinders yet.. my mouth had automatically moved into a smile for her anyway.

If someone smiles at you, you smile back.
That’s just logical.

“Do you think you can walk Han? I need to get you back to mum before dinner..”

With a lot of effort I managed to push myself upright and slowly moved into a wobbly standing position.
Sarah squinted at me thoughtfully.

“Good enough, if mum asks I’ll tell her you felt a bit ill in the car.”
I nodded my head as best I could.
My head is slowly starting to clear.. painfully slowly.

“I felt ill the other.. day.. she-”

I almost lost my balance and had to lean backwards quickly with a yelp.
Sarah surged forward and caught me with a steadying arm.
“..She’ll buy it.”
Sarah smiled at me again and my lips pulled into a happy smile too.

Things are getting clearer but I feel far too happy to be normal right now..

“Com’ on then Han. I’ll put you in the car and you can sleep a bit more on the way there.”
She shifted her arm a little to give me more support and slowly started moving us out of the flat.
“Is there anything else you need while we’re here?”

I rolled my shoulders and laughed a little at the weird heavy, tight feeling on my head.
“My Pyjamas.. my bag.. books and my laptop?”
She nodded her head and focused on getting us carefully down the stairwell.

I spent the descent clinging to the banister for support, the last thing I need to do is fall down the stairs right now..

======

The slam of Sarah’s car boot woke me up with a jolt.
My magic surged forth protectively before I could stop it and with a muted flash, the car shook and Sarah fell on her ass with a surprised yelp.

“Son of a-”
She made her way back to her feet while rubbing her eyes and gave me an annoyed look in the rear view mirror.

I shrugged with an apologetic frown, it’s not like I can help it, she startled me..
For a second she seemed to forgive me but then her eyes drifted and she let off a sharp gasp.

“What the hell did you do to my CAR?!”

My shoulders sunk back into the seat a bit tighter.
I didn’t need to look around to guess what I’d done.
The same thing I’ve done to everything since Edith added this new diversion to my instinctive ice magic.. I fixed it.

Maybe if I stay huddled in this seat and focus on the waves of pleasure rolling around my body from releasing yet ANOTHER wave of oppressive magic build-up from my lines, things will just work out without my input.

The feeling is still so good.
Not quite as good as the last one, that left me in some kind of pleasure induced giggly waking-coma state, but still really nice in general..

“Holy crap Han..”
I chanced a glance up at her face and felt a bit relieved that she didn’t seem angry anymore.

With a squeal she dived into the car to pull me into an excited hug.
“Holy CRAP Han, you fixed my CAR!”
I tried to shift around weakly so I could breathe easier but she let me go quickly enough that it didn’t really matter.

She sunk into the driver seat and rubbed her hands on the steering wheel in awe.

With a yank she slammed her door shut and shoved the keys in the ignition.
The car ticked over instantly and purred like the day it was made, instead of the rough asthmatic wheeze I’m used to hearing from her car at this point.

The poor thing is over ten years old after all.

She bought it ‘pre-loved’ from a rather active past-owner too, so it was never in the best of conditions to start with..
She still loves it though.

I suggested she get a new one at one point a while ago but she refused.
She said some silly stuff about it being like family and if we had a Grandma, that we knew, we wouldn’t throw her out the door the moment she started making old people noises.
At the time I honestly didn’t care enough to argue with her logic.

“oh hoo, your all shiny Betty!”

..oh no.. she’s talking to it again..
THIS is why I didn’t care enough to argue with her logic.

She talks to the bloody car if it’s ‘misbehaving’.. or in this case when it’s suddenly got a magically assisted makeover.

I rolled my eyes and tried to not make eye contact with her.
She’ll only drag me into her madness and make me talk to it too..

I’m kind of impressed by what my new diverted magic has done though.

I don’t have the first clue about how to repair a car but it definitely sounds like my magic managed it somehow.
The seats feel less ‘used’ now too, the paint on the hood is shining brightly in the setting sunlight with not even a scratch visible to my eyes.

Even the mirrors are clean and clear.
Hell, the car actually SMELLS new now!

Just WHAT the hell did Edith set my magic to divert to??

Judging by how much power I use every time my magic sparks off now, it can’t just be a basic elemental change.
I thought doing stuff like changing fire to lava or water to ice would be a big gap in power but this.. this effect I keep having..

It’s off the charts!

If I wasn’t ME, and a locus point..
I’d literally be able to have a single angry outburst per day before I was magically drained into uselessness, and that’s talking best case scenario!

A normal mage with this diversion on them could possibly, no make that PROBABLY, fall into a dangerous level of magic withdrawal where their body starts shutting down from having a near empty core.

..Trust me that is NOT a nice way to die quickly..

======

“We’re going to go to the car place on south-sixth street and get you some nice new fluffy dice to celebrate.. yes we are, yes we are..”
..Now she’s baby talking to the car, while rubbing the dashboard..

Forget ‘magic making people crazy’, I think it’s just something that runs in our family.

With one memory modification mum is convinced she came up with the name ‘Arista’ from an old family myth and that I should dress like a school girl in public..
I’ve got the world’s most complicated form of multiple personality disorder.. and Sarah baby talks to her car..

Our whole family is one big psychologists dream pay-check waiting to happen!

I coughed into my fist a little to get Sarah’s attention.
She stopped rubbing the dashboard and gave me an awkward, apologetic look as a blush formed slightly on her cheeks.

“Sorry..”
It was a struggle not to laugh but I held it down to a simple understanding smile with slightly tweaked eyebrow.
“I’ll just..”
Her blush didn’t dim but she left the sentence unfinished as she reached for her keys.

I let it drop and put my head back against the headrest of the seat.

I feel a lot better now, my head still feels oddly heavy and tight but hopefully that will go away over time, at least my hairs not in the way, the last few times I’ve got in the car I’ve tangled it all over my face getting in or just got it caught in the door somehow.
..stupid long hair..

Sarah gave me one more awkward look but quickly turned back to the car, revved the engine and grinned when it roared in healthy agreement to her plans.

“Buckle up Han, we’re taking the new improved Betty for a spin.”
I scrabbled frantically for my seatbelt.

She’s bad enough normally, I do NOT need to die in a car crash because of an unworn seatbelt thank-you-very-much!

With one more roaring rev of the engine Sarah shot us out of the parking lot behind the flats and whipped into the evening rush-hour.
My hand came up to my mouth and I had to hold back the sudden urge to vomit.

..How does she still have her licence?!..

======

We gently rolled to a stop in mum’s driveway and Sarah let out a happy sigh of satisfaction.
I tried to pry my white knuckles off of the handle above my door and sighed to myself in relief.

All signs of my previous, pleasure induced, sleepy-ness are gone at this point.

The only thing that stopped me from letting off yet ANOTHER set of magical ‘fix everything’ power blasts every time she took a tight corner at speed was the very real possibility that they might somehow fix her car even MORE and make us go FASTER!
I’ve spent the last fifteen minutes with a tight clamp on my magic, to not let even a hint of it escape, just in case.

My sister is a menace to society when driving, especially when she’s enjoying it!

Sarah turned off the engine and almost seemed to fly across the divide between us to hug me tightly.
“You’re the best! I love you, have I told you lately that I love you? Because I love you and you fixed my CAR and it’s so amazing!”

Her hug felt a bit too tight.
I had to wheeze in a breath past her squishing my new, smaller, chest cavity and now-existent boobs too much.

“That was fun right? What about when I overtook that guy in the sports car, the LOOK on his face! I-”
She seemed to notice something about the look on MY face and almost dropped me back into the passenger seat, in a rush her hand flicked open the door and she pushed me sideways so I was leaning out of the car.

“Oh no you don’t! This is my nice shiny new Betty, you’re NOT throwing up in her Han!”
I don’t know what she’s worrying about, I honestly don’t think I’m going throw up right now..

I may have come a bit close at times, like the moment she just mentioned, when she sped past the sports car driver earlier while absentmindedly dodging other cars across all three lanes.. but by now I’m pretty much stuck on simply feeling glad that it’s all over..

Just to be safe, I might have to add ‘Cars’ to my list of things I would rather warp dangerously long distances with shadow magic to avoid using, or even CONSIDERING using.
They could sit nicely underneath ‘Gryphons’, ‘Planes’ and ‘Normal warping methods’ on my list without too much hassle.. and I’d NEVER have to face Sarah’s, so called, ‘driving’ EVER again!

“I’m not going to throw up Sare.. just.. I’m glad you like what my magic accidentally did and all, but just PLEASE don’t drive like that with me in here again..”

She seemed a bit upset I wasn’t sharing her joy and thrill for the insane ride we just had, but after a moment she worked out why I wouldn’t enjoy it at least.
“Sorry Han, I forget you’re not too good with motion sickness sometimes.”

It’s nothing to do with motion sickness!

I used to get that easily as a kid but I got over it as I got older, mostly.
It’s her driving that’s the problem!

I opened my mouth to tell her EXACTLY that but was interrupted by a laugh from the house.
My head moved up the pathway and settled on mum.
She obviously found something amusing.

“Oh Sarah, really? How did you talk her into letting you do something like THAT?”
My eyebrow perked up suspiciously.

I slowly turned to face Sarah, the question all over my face.
She let off a nervous laugh.

She had her ‘I’m guilty and I know I’m caught’ face on for some reason..

I waited for Sarah to explain but she seemed reluctant to do so, her hand was trying to discreetly open the driver side door.
Meanwhile mum made her way over to us and gently touched something behind my shoulder.
The weight and tightness I’d been feeling around my head since I woke up changed slightly at her touch.

“I had enough of a struggle getting her dressed for Gladstone’s this morning. You have her for a few hours and she comes back in platted pigtails..”

Sarah cringed as my eyes went painfully wide.
In all the confusion and pleasure overloaded drowsiness I’d written off the feeling of my head as a simple headache..

“Sarah!”
Before I could say anything else she gave off a yelp and shot out of the door at a, near enough, full sprint.
I tried to get up to chase her but mum got in the way.

Without an easy option to get past her, unless I push her aside and potentially hurt her, I had to stand there outside the car while mum played with my apparently platted hair.. which Sarah must have done while I was passed out earlier!

Mum smiled at me in that horribly warm way that seems to drain my willpower so much lately and flipped one of the braids over my shoulder so I could see it better.
It’s just as long as my hair has been for the last few days, just a lot more compact.

..probably easier to manage too..

NO!
I need to stop thinking RIGHT now, I don’t want to even consider the idea that pigtails could in ANY way be a good or practical look for me!

“It’s pretty. You should keep your hair like this more often, when your home at least.”
Reluctantly I eased out of my tense, ready to run, stance and let my shoulders droop.

“Come on in Ari, dinners cooking and I’ve got news that may be of interest to you and Sarah.”
She slipped an arm around my shoulders and started leading me into the house.
Her smile stayed at ‘slightly amused’ and her free hand kept fiddling with my left braid for some reason.

Someday, in some way, Sarah will PAY for this!

======

“Can you set the table Ari?”
I moved my eyes away from the window where I’d been glaring at Sarah.
She seemed reluctant to come into the house with me watching her so closely, naturally that just made me watch her even closer.

She’d better apologise when she gets in or I don’t know what I’ll do!
I’m tempted to hit her with the ‘perfect hair’ spell that did such an AMAZING job on my own hair the other day.. but she’d probably thank me for it..

Is there such a thing as a ‘bad hair day’ spell?

It feels like there should be.. it’s just the right level of petty humiliation and annoyance to make a good low-level hex for new mages..

If there isn’t one I might have to just make one myself!
I could write a book about it, ‘One-hundred and one ways to annoy your sister with magic’, has a nice ring to it right about now..

With a huff I started gathering the cutlery.
I heard the backdoor close loudly downstairs but didn’t pause in my steps towards the table.

While I was putting mums stuff in place Sarah’s footsteps came up behind me, judging by her uneven pace she was a bit hesitant to get too close at the moment.

“Han I’m sorry. I.. you looked really sweet sleeping on the sofa like that and when you didn’t wake up no matter what I did. My mind kind of.. drifted..”
I grunted and put a fork on the table a bit harder than necessary.
“Your hair is really nice now, I’m kind of jealous.”

An evil little smirk formed on my lips but I didn’t turn around to face her.

“I can do the same spell on you if you like? You can just tell everyone you got hair extensions or something.”
She caught me off guard by hugging me from behind with an excited squeal.

I thought she stopped squealing years ago but apparently today’s one big exception.

“You can really do that?”
My initial thoughts of revenge melted away at the awe in her voice.

We’ve never really gotten to bond over magic.
We’ve not had the time, more than anything else, honestly..

“Sure, I’ll do it when mum leaves tomorrow. You’re staying here tonight right?”

She let go of me and made an agreeing noise at the back of her throat.
“I have to mention that to mum actually, I’m sure she’ll go for it. Why don’t you leave the rest of the table to me and go get changed?”
Her hand flipped one of my braids playfully.
“When you get back I’ll take them out too.”

My slight annoyance at her reminding me of the braids drained away when I turned to face her and saw the fond look on her face.

It’s been a while since she’s looked at me like that.
Even after everything improved between us again in our teens she’s always seemed more guilty or worried when looking at me then she used to.

It’s amazing the things you can miss without even realising it.
I missed mum being nice to me, and I missed Sarah looking at me without being worried about something..

..If I keep this up I’m just going to end up as a big, walking bag of regrets..

I shook my head a little to clear the intrusive bad thoughts and smiled back at her.
With a sigh I passed over the cutlery to her and made my way back to my new room to get changed.

On the one hand, no more school uniform is ALWAYS going to be a plus.
On the other.. I have no idea what I’m going to wear..

======

The wolf whistle made me jump a little in surprise.
Sarah’s grin gave me a good indicator who the source of it was.

“Looking good han. I knew you’d like those shorts given the chance, I love them for work.”

My hand went down to fiddle with the leg cuffs of the silly tan colored ‘adventurer short-shorts’ that Sarah got me so many of the other day.

I hate to admit it but they ARE kind of comfortable.
Paired with a long t-shirt I don’t feel TOO self-conscious in them either.

They’re better than the school uniform at least.

“Want me to undo the braids for you?”
Mum walked over with a serving dish in her hand and opened her mouth to protest but I beat her to it.

“..maybe later. They’ll stop my hair from falling in my food for now at least.”
Sarah gave me a knowing look for some reason but didn’t argue luckily.

I honestly don’t mind the braids.
They’re embarrassing but I was going to get mum to do something similar at some point anyway.
Maybe not ‘pigtails’ exactly but a braid is a lot more efficient in holding my hair back if I can’t get it cut at some point soon.

If Sarah’s going to get me to use the ‘perfect hair’ spell to give her longer hair too then I’m not even sure if I WANT to get it cut anymore.. at least our hair can be the same again..
It’s not quite ‘being twins’ or anything but it would be something, ya know?

Before I could sink too far into considering the possible meanings behind that idea, Sarah tugged my arm and got me to sit in the seat next to her instead.

I reached out to grab a bit of garlic bread before we served out the meal but mum slapped my hand down gently.
“We say grace first..”

My eyebrow almost shot off my face with surprise.
A glance at Sarah told me I wasn’t the only one feeling a bit wrong footed.
We never said grace before, mum’s not really that big into religion after all..

She bowed her head and cupped her hands over her meal.
With a reluctant glance at each other, me and Sarah followed suit.

“By the grace of Lady Arista we share this meal, in pack, as family. May her blessings bring us strength in our struggles and keep hunt from our door. Amen”
My head had shot up the moment she mentioned that name again.

In a kind of stunned daze I echoed her ‘Amen’ and tried to not look like she’d said something so obviously weird.
From what I could see out of the corner of my eye, I hope I did a better job of it then Sarah.
She was giving me an intensely worried look without even trying to hide it.

While pulling my hands apart I waved a quick message for her to keep calm in twin speak.
She didn’t seem quite ready to give up on how weird mum’s sudden need to say ‘grace’ was, but I can’t really blame her.

I’m not exactly sure what’s going on right now either..

We all silently started piling food on our plates.
For the first time in the last few days, mum didn’t reprimand me for putting so much on there at once.
She actually seemed slightly amused by it instead for some reason.

We spent almost five minutes of silent, awkward chewing.
Sarah kept shooting me looks which I did my best to ignore.

“oh..”
Mum put her fork down and swallowed the food in her mouth.
“I almost forgot. Don’t make any plans this weekend kids”

Sarah shot me yet ANOTHER worried look at that.
“I went to see your Gran this morning, to give her the good news about you getting into Gladstone’s Ari, and she’s invited us all over to the farm for the weekend.”

My mouth dropped open.
I heard Sarah’s fork hit her plate at about the same time.

What ‘Gran’ is she on about?
We don’t HAVE family, not any that we talk to at least.. well.. except for Uncle Joe, but even he’s only over for the holidays once in a while!

“It’s been so long since I’ve been back home, the old den hasn’t changed at all.”
She frowned slightly and cupped her head on a hand thoughtfully.
“..I’d forgotten so many details of it all..”

She seemed to drift off a little with a happy smile before pulling herself back together.

“..Anyway, your Gran can’t WAIT to see you both, she said your cousins and extended family will be there too.”
She smiled warmly at us then got that strangely faraway look in her eyes again as she stared out at the mountains through the window.
“I couldn’t have picked a better time to visit. The big family barbeque is this weekend, I’d completely forgotten, it’s been so long since I celebrated a real Metanoia festival with everyone..”

..Metanoia…festival..?

My brain threw in a handy translation for me, sort of.
The King James Bible apparently says something about ‘Metanoia’ being ancient greek for ‘to repent’. I don’t know any more than that surprisingly…

I’m pretty solid on middle to modern greek from my past-incarnations but I don’t remember any incarnations that spoke real ancient greek sadly..

Mum turned her head back around and shot a strange look between us.
“Come to think of it, I don’t think either of you have ever been to Metanoia, have you?”

I numbly shook my head and I think Sarah did the same.

Mum paused for a second, then shook her own head back at us.
“We took Sarah to Metanoia when she was one or two I think.. god, has it really been THAT long since I last went?..”

Sarah’s foot came down hard on mine under the table.
I shot her an annoyed look and cringed back a little.
She did NOT look happy, her eyes screamed worry and confusion.

I’m pretty lost as well..

This is all too much to be just a ‘side effect’ of mums memory modification.
There’s too much detail, too many wide changes to her personal history..

Either someone’s done something ELSE to her recently.. or she’s actually fine?

Is it possible that we really DO have a Grandmother out there, ready to meet us this weekend?
I mean.. I know vaguely that we must have had one at some point, I think mum mentioned her before..
I must have been a bit busy at the time though, I don’t quite remember when it came up in conversation.

..And.. cousins.. and family?
W..why?.. when.. how.. WHY?!

We’ve spent twenty-four years of our lives without any contact from anyone but Uncle Joe.
Mum never talked properly about her family in all that time!

We kind of assumed they were.. ya know.. dead or something?..

“You’ll love the farm Ari, it’s got everything you could want to keep you entertained.”
Mums smile seemed a bit awkward there, I think she means something more than the obvious meaning I got from it with that look but I’m not getting whatever double meaning she may be trying to give off.

Sarah coughed to get attention and shuffled her fork awkwardly on her plate.

“I’m not sure I ca-”
My foot came down heavily on hers making her wince.

Oh no you don’t sister dearest!
You’re NOT dodging your way out of this one and leaving ME to face it alone!

Mum got something from Sarah’s failed attempt to leave me in the lurch at least.

“I’m sure they won’t mind if you bring Tor with you sweetie, he’s practically family too.”
I discreetly moved my hand over my mouth to cover the huge vindictive grin that formed on my face.

That’s what you get for trying to stick ME with all of this on my own Sarah!

Sarah’s face progressed through a few different colors and finally settled on looking slightly pale.
“I’m sure I can make it mum but I think he might have some freelance camera work this weekend.”
She gave off a nervous laugh and shot me a pleading look.

After a moments consideration, where she seemed to become more worried by the second, I nodded to myself a little.
She’s suffered enough.. for now.

“You haven’t asked about my day at Gladstone’s yet mum.”
Mum’s head turned from watching Sarah to me with an interested gleam already alight in her eyes.

Sarah let off a relieved sigh and nudged me with her knee under the table in thanks.

“How was it Ari? Did you make any new friends?”
Her smile was warm and she seemed to get even more glee at the idea of me making friends.

“well.. there was this one guy, Felix, he showed me around the halls. He was pretty cute honestly..”

From that auspicious start, I twisted most of the day’s events into something that sounded close to a ‘school’ environment situation.
Trudy is my new PhysEd teacher.. it seemed to fit..

The headmistress was a really warm older lady named Rosemary, even though she was open and friendly, she showed a moment of almost scary cold determination when dealing with a misbehaving student who was ‘making up stories’..

I even managed to rope Fena and Edith into it all.

Mum was SO pleased that I already had a friend who would be in ‘classes’ with me, even if she WAS a bit of a goth.
Sarah got progressively more amused as I went on, she couldn’t resist sliding in little snipes about Fena and even backed me up in explaining how informal but entertaining my history teacher Edith was with her when she came to pick me up.

Like all good lies, I stuck to things that were easy to remember and not entirely hard to fake if mum decides to check up on me later.

Who knows, I might be able to even get Fena to wear one of my ‘school uniforms’.
Seeing as it’s not exactly an official thing or anything I’d have to fib a little but..
I mean it’s FENA.. in a school uniform.. how adorable would that be?!

I could get blackmail pictures and everything!

..on second thought..
She could get blackmail pictures of ME too, with a LOT less effort involved..
Probably best not to try and actually enact that little idea/fantasy.
Let the sleeping, photograph taking, dragon lie.

Still, the usually gothic Fena would look amazing in one of my tartan skirts..

Maybe I can talk her into trying on the skirt part of the uniform at some point at least?
I might have to tatter it up a little first, she doesn’t tend to wear skirts unless they’re in SOME way damaged.
It’s a goth thing apparently.

“What about-”
I zoned out a little and let Sarah cover this question for once.
Mum’s enjoying herself at least.

If I didn’t know any better I’d say she’s living vicariously through me to get a feel for what ‘Gladstones’ is like.
Hopefully she loses interest soon, I’ve run out of ideas for things to twist from today into something non-magical..

======

“Night girls”
My head moved automatically to look at mum in the doorway and the piece of popcorn I’d been balancing on my nose fell off instantly.

Sarah let out a victorious ‘whoop’ of success and pointed at me with a laugh.
Mum just seemed amused by it all.

“Try not to stay up too late, you both might have a day off tomorrow but I don’t, okay?”
We nodded in sync.

In the process Sarah’s popcorn fell off her nose too.
For a moment I felt like trying to declare that as a victory of my own but it’s been too nice a night to REALLY be competitive.

After dinner we’d gotten changed into our bed-clothes.

Mum seemed pretty surprised when I turned up in an ultra-baggy pair of men’s pyjamas but when Sarah claimed them as her old ones, she seemed to calm down a little.
The fact that Sarah’s borrowed my pyjamas a few times in the past means she can technically claim them I guess, I can’t blame her, they ARE comfortable after all.

Especially now that the sleeves cover over my hands, it feels like I’m wrapped in a big warm blanket all the time!

We watched some movies, hence the popcorn.
Sarah decided to redo my hair into a less childish style.
Mum had fun huddling with her behind me discussing what they could do with it all while I played ‘hair-stylists doll’ for them both and tried to watch the movie.
I actually really like the end result surprisingly.

Sarah platted the hair along both sides of my head and somehow combined them together at the back of my head with the main mass of hair into one super long, thick braid.
It feels like the style is familiar for some reason, I think one of my incarnations from the middle ages had a similar thing with flowers woven into it.

While the flowers would be a bit too much, I like the style I have now, it’s functional.
Out of the way without looking weird..

Wow, my standards for a ‘good hairstyle’ sound pretty low when I put it like that, don’t they?
It’s true though.

I’m not going to pretend I’m not at least a LITTLE self-conscious about how I look but in general, as long as it’s not constantly in my face or getting caught on things, I’m happy enough.
That’s why I always let Sarah talk me into having a similar haircut to her, despite us having grown out of that whole ‘identical means IDENTICAL’ stage of our lives a long time ago.

Admittedly that was just above the shoulders instead of this long mass I have now but the shoulder length hair WAS different from how we used to keep our hair as kids and took just as much getting used to as the long hair will.

The fact that it didn’t interfere with my life in general was the reason I let her pick whatever she wanted style wise, I think she actually went shorter then she would have liked just for my sake at the time.

As much as we have moved on from the ‘clones of each other’ image we used to give off in our daily lives, I’ll admit that I still LIKE having similarities between us at least.
Even now, when I can’t REALLY pull off pretending to be her anymore without magical assistance.

“I’m going to head off too Han.”

Sarah caught me off guard a little but with a glance at the TV I realised that the credits had actually rolled on the last movie we were watching while we did our little ‘popcorn balancing’ face-off.
“I’ll go too..”

She came over and gave me a quick hug before we started tidying up for bed.

Every once in a while, as we passed each other with trash and cups going between the TV room and the kitchen, Sarah would give me a slight hug as if she couldn’t resist doing it.

I left each hug with a smile on my face.
We’ve not been this openly affectionate in years.

Something about being back here, together like this, is putting us both in a weird but good mood.

When everything was cleared we made our way around the house, checking the door locks, and split up at the stairs with a quite ‘good night’.
I went up to my new room in the old guest bedroom, while Sarah went down the hall to her old room.

I don’t envy her having to fit onto that little bed again.
It was barely big enough for us to sleep on when we lived here and she’s had years to get used to having a double bed to herself at the flat.
I’m glad my new bed is so wide.
Being a guest bedroom, it had to have a double bed for some reason in mums mind.

I’m not sure how I would have handled being on a little narrow bed again, along with everything else.

Single beds just feel really childish to me for some reason..

======

At some point in the night, probably about three in the morning if I’d have to guess, my bedroom door opened quietly.

I’d been dozing for a while but it’s not like I have a clock or phone to check the time with currently.
I tend to be a light sleeper anyway.. well.. when I’m not passed out or completely exhausted at least.

“Han?”
I moved my head up from the pillow and squinted into the darkness but I couldn’t really make out much more than a slightly moving object by the door.

The object, with Sarah’s voice, moved over and came to rest on the side of my bed.
“Is it okay if I sleep in here? It’s weird in my old room without you next door..”
I grunted and rolled over enough to clear the pillow away from my mouth.

Feeling a bit playful despite the late hour I considered saying no for a moment but rolled my eyes and kicked the covers clear slightly for her instead.

“Fine, just don’t grab my ass again.”

She does that in her sleep sometimes, it’s really awkward.
She apologises in the morning but I still end up being the one with handprints on my skin at that point, so naturally, it annoys me every time..

There was a lot of shuffling covers and wiggling before we got comfortable.
Sarah settled herself in the bed facing me for some reason.
I could feel her breath ghosting across my face and collarbone, she was THAT close.

“I’ve missed this..”
She slid her arms around my waist and nuzzled her cheek against mine like she used to do when we were kids.

I didn’t answer for a second but in the end I gave up to the truth of the situation.
“..me too..”

She giggled naughtily and rubbed her cheek on mine again.

“Com’ on ‘anna. Le’s go ‘leep..”
Her voice went up an octave or two as she spoke and she squeezed me tighter to herself with a contented sigh.
I rolled my eyes fondly instead of arguing.

She’s proven many times over the years that her childhood ‘speech impediments’ were almost entirely intentional.
I have no doubt they didn’t START that way, but as time went on she probably liked to sound ‘cute’ or some other silly reasoning.

It’s still one of the few things about her I’ve never managed to copy correctly.
You’d be surprised how hard it is to put, what is essentially a really thick accent, on at the drop of a hat.

“S’top f’inkin ‘anna. Go ‘leep..”
I gave her a mild growl in return, not really in annoyance but more of an acknowledgement that I would when she stopped talking.

Her hand tapped out a twin speak code on my back.
One of the first ones we ever created.
I repeated the code on her shoulder with a little smile.

We both snuggled in to sleep properly this time.

Her hand shifted slightly and she slowly tapped out the code one more time on my back.
My smile spread a bit more and I tapped it out on her arm in return.

..love you too Sarah..

What do you do when the voice's in your head have joined a union and demand workers rights? Events unfold including but not limited to: Sarah waking up in a good mood (eventually). And Hannah's dreams involve a squid.. maybe.

“..Really?”

I jolted awake in bed.
My arms got caught in Sarah’s and for just a second I panicked.

My magic pushed forth and in a bright golden flash the room was covered in my new ‘fix it/heal it’ effect.

Mum batted her eyes frantically from the flash and quickly walked over to the window to shut the curtains tightly.
“..Early morning sun is evil.”

I had to repress a laugh at her mumble, from both relief that she’d come up with her own cover story for the bright light and genuine amusement.
The warm giggly feeling of pleasure inside me from having vented magic again probably helped my mood too, I’ve never really been a morning person before but I feel all warm and happy now.

Sarah grunted and rolled over, her arm slinging around my waist to tug me back to her chest.

Mum seemed a bit exasperated but surprisingly wasn’t trying to stop the situation.
She always used to get pretty angry when she caught us in the same bed as kids.
I guess, the fact that I’m now a girl could make a difference..
Maybe she’s not as worried about it?

“I take it she couldn’t sleep in her old room?”
My shoulders shifted slightly in the best shrug I could manage with Sarah clinging to me.
“She’s probably not used to sleeping alone, I used to struggle without your fath-”
Mum cut herself off mid-sentence, a frown forming on her face for a moment.
With a forced breath she seemed to dismiss the obviously bad thoughts that had risen from accidentally mentioning dad.

I tried not to stare too obviously as she brought a hand up to run through her hair and shifted uncomfortably.
“I’m going to work anyway, figured you should both be getting up. Sarah can cook you breakfast.”
She gave me a strained smile and rubbed one hand into the other self-consciously.

“I can make my own breakfast ya know?”

Mum gave me an odd look for a second and finally seemed to settle on just being amused.
“Sure you can Ari.. I’ll believe it when I see it.”

I huffed and shifted slightly in Sarah’s death-grip which did little more than make her grumble and pull me in for a more secure hug.
My face must have shown my annoyance because mum laughed openly this time and made her way to my bedroom door.

“Sarah always had a thing for cuddling her teddy-bears too tightly..”
She leaned against the doorframe a little and gave me a warm teasing smile.
“From the way she used to practically carry you when you were little, I thought we might have to rename you to suit your station in life.”

Her hand came up to cover her mouth a little and her eyes twinkled slightly in a way I’ve not seen from her in a long time.

“In the end I gave it up, who would be cruel enough to call their daughter ‘Teddy’.. I guess we could have gone for the longer version though..”
She squinted at me thoughtfully and ran a hand along the doorframe casually.

“It’s funny, I could actually see you as a ‘Theodora’, Dora for short obviously..”

My breath had caught in my throat and wouldn’t release from the moment she said that name.
Her smile was warm and happy but it didn’t help much.
I must have had a troubled look on my face because she quickly continued in a rush as if to reassure me.

“Ari suits you better of course. It’s a much better name in general, don’t mind your old mum, I’m just in a silly mood this morning. It must be having you both under the same roof again, it’s made me all nostalgic..”
I almost felt relieved when Sarah shifted in bed and squeezed me enough to force the stuck breath out of my lungs.

..There’s no way mum has ANY idea about Theodora?.. it’s all just one big coincidence..

She gave me one more smile and patted her hand on the doorframe as if signalling the end of the conversation.
“Right, I’m off. Have fun today. Don’t let Sarah sleep in too late Ari.”
With a wave over her shoulder she left the room and a minute later I heard the front garage door open followed quickly by the rev of her car pulling away.

As the garage door trundled closed I let out a sigh and tried to calm myself down.

It was just a coincidence.
She couldn’t POSSIBLY have ANY idea about Theodora, or any of my past-incarnations for that matter..

“Go ‘leep Alis.”
Sarah shifted her head a bit and pulled me back under the covers again, still seemingly asleep or at least unwilling to admit that she was awake.

I cringed a little when she used yet another name I really don’t want to think about right now.
Sarah’s usually careful to not call me ‘Alis’ anymore, ever since dad ruined it for us.
She must be barely half-awake, if that, to have used it so casually.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll go back to sleep Sare.”

Her head shifted and she squinted one beady eye at me for a moment then settled back down with a huff.
I huffed back at her automatically.
We used to make that noise if words would be a waste of effort in an argument.

I kicked my legs a little under the covers and pulled myself into the crook of Sarah’s arms a bit more.

Sleeping a little longer can’t hurt.
It’s not like we’re on a tight schedule today and Sarah DID have me up at three this morning..

My eyes squinted shut and I tried to push out my worried thoughts about mum and Theodora.

I’m just being silly.
I’m far too twitchy when it comes to my past-incarnations names.
It’s not like someone saying it is going to invoke her forward or something equally scary.

It’s just a name after all..

======

“Nice of you to drop by.”
The sarcasm from my own voice threw me off for a moment but after a second to process what was happening I shot to my feet.

She watched me with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

“Ellie’s over at the council chamber, ask someone if you get lost.”
Without another word she turned her eyes away from me to look back down at the book in her lap.

It took me a little bit for my head to clear so I could work out what was happening.

One minute I was dreaming about.. something.. I can’t remember what.. I think there was a squid involved.. maybe.
Anyway, one minute I was dreaming semi-normally, the next I was here.. lying face down on the glowing white floor of my mindscape, surrounded by busy sounds and being talked down to by the same past-incarnation that met me the last time I came in here, minus her clipboard and tent this time though.

A scan of the area left me with no small amount of awe.
They’ve certainly been busy!

It’s barely been a few days since I was last in here and what was a shanty town of mixed tents, campsites and miniature buildings had progressed into a full blown city.
..Well.. town at least.. a relatively small town at that, but the buildings were bigger and looked a lot more permanent at least.
I guess there’s some kind of metaphorical meaning to all this development.

I should probably be worried that so much progress has been made in integrating my past-selves into my mind in such a short space of time, but all I can bring myself to feel is some small sense of pride.

As weird as it sounds, I trust them.

We have a pretty solid understanding between ourselves now.
I can’t feel any mixed emotions or anything either.
It’s a feeling which is usually more noticeable in here than in the real world, so if there WAS any real dissent or unease in their minds about the whole ‘council’ thing I should be feeling it by now..

“Follow the main street, council chambers are in the town center. If you reach the forest then you’ve gone too far.”
I shot a look at the incarnation and she glanced up at me from her book with a quirked eyebrow as if curious why I was just standing there.

Rosaline.. I think that’s her name.
I vaguely remember her introducing herself while her nose barely left another book.
Bit of an odd one, English but easy going enough to adopt a lot of modern mannerism’s as times gone on.
Not many past-incarnations can do that, they all seem to be pretty stuck in the past at times.

My eyes cut across the town within my mindscape again.
Just a little ahead of us the plain white floor gave way to a built up cobbled street with houses lining either side.
Far in the distance I could see some greenery mixed in around the roofs and buildings dotted around.

This must be what it’s like when you change your mindscape.
After I failed at doing it so badly I never bothered looking into the whole system properly.
What would be the point?.. I may have been in a bit of a bad mood at the time too.

“Go on, Sarah’s bound to wake up soon, we haven’t got all day..”
I shot her one more confused look.
“You know what’s going on outside of here?”

She gave me a blatant ‘are you stupid or something?’ look.
I wanted to be offended but what’s the point in arguing when it’s part of your own mind giving you that sort of look?

“Ever since we started settling in we’ve been sharing your senses to varying degrees of success. The council are happy, it helps them keep up-to-date on things.. I’d be happier if you read more though, I could do with some new material.”
Her hand came up with the heavy leather bound book she’d been reading before and she wiggled it lazily to show just how boring she was finding it.
“Third time I’ve read this one in the last few days alone..”

My mouth quirked a little in amusement.
“I’ll grab some light reading at some point and use a memory enhancement spell to speed read them for you. Any preferred genre?”
She huffed in a way that was eerily similar to my last exchange with Sarah and gave me an amused look in return.

“Drama, romance and the classics.. no Shakespeare though.. stupid old hack.”
For some reason she puffed up angrily for a moment but judging by how quickly she let the frustration on her face go away it was probably not directed at me at least.

I gave her an awkward smile and a salute in return.
She saluted me back, a smirk just peeking across her lips as she did so.
I got a few steps away from her before everything clicked in my head.

Rosaline.. Shakespeare..

My head swung to look at her thoughtfully but she’d moved from her previous seat and presumably slipped into her large two-story house.
The outside didn’t give many indications if my suspicions were correct, except for a balcony to the side of it that reminded me of the one we used in my high schools rendition of ‘Romeo and Juliet’.
That, and the odd Blue and yellow family crest above her front door…

“The all-seeing sun indeed.. I think Mercutio’s version is probably closer to the truth, she’s definitely pale and comes across as hard-hearted at first..”

Having spent part of yesterday hanging out with two un-awakened, honest to the powers, myths.. it feels like not much can phase me at this point.
It’s still a strange thought though.
I never really put much weight into Shakespeare’s work before, like most people I figured it was fiction.

Who knows, maybe one day I’ll get the chance to sit down with her and find out what really happened from the one character I can think of from that story that didn’t have some kind of tragic death by the end of it.
The truth is often stranger than fiction, especially if when you consider she’s one of MY past-incarnations, and therefore a mage.
That’s one thing off the bat that wasn’t mentioned in Romeo and Juliet!

I shook my head and laughed at myself slightly.
Now’s not the time for that though.

I really should go find out what’s been going on in my head while I’ve been busy in the real world.
If the ‘council’ found out that I’d dropped in, however unintentionally, and hadn’t gone to visit them they’ll probably find some way to get revenge.

With one final look back at the house of an incarnation which, until recently, I would have labelled as a fictional character I moved on up the cobbled street.. on the hunt for some kind of official, government looking, building.

Shouldn’t be too hard to find..

======

“wow..”

It’s BIG.. very, very big..
It kinda feels like I should have been able to see this building above all the others in my mindscape.. or like.. see it from space or something?

I’m getting the feeling that a lot of my own expectations are being used when these buildings are being formed.
A lot of the houses I passed on my way here seem to be either stereotypically relevant to their owners in design or have parts to them that I recognise from things in my life, the balcony on Rosaline’s house for example, or that little townhouse on the corner with a pair of my favourite boxer shorts hanging from the washing line.

This ‘council chamber’ seems to have been based on the Klamath falls county court house I always walk past on the way to Fena’s shop.. only bigger.. a LOT bigger.

The roughly square red-brick building makes it easy to see where the entrance is because one side of it has a fancy curved, three story high, glass front with a load of railing caged steps leading up to its multiple glass doors.
The scale on this version is definitely off from the original, my mindscapes version seems to have a glass front that’s somewhere between six and eight stories high at least!

I’m tempted to think the size of the building has been taken from my childhood memories of it.
It always seemed huge to me as a kid AND it seemed to come out of nowhere every time we turned the corner on Main Street.
In all likelihood it IS taken directly from those memories now that I think about it..

Just out of curiosity I circled the building before going in.
The parking lot behind it is full of cars like the real one usually is.

I’d hoped if I had a look at the licence plates on them I could tell if the cars were from an old memory and what kind of year we’re talking about here.
Sadly the cars in the lot are just a mix of cars I vaguely recognise from daily life.

The sedan on the far side is the Martials old car, the one they got rid of years ago.
Sitting on its own to my left is the new shiny version of Sarah’s ‘Betty’.. so I can’t really judge anything of use from their presence.

After glancing through a few car windows and finding nothing of interest I moved back around to the front of the council chambers.
I guess I could ask Ellie when I get in there, she’s been pretty good at providing information about things around here for me.

Who knew that magically dividing your brains processing power between yourself and another version of you to help avert the mental overload that comes with having far too many past-incarnations in your head could also give you the mental equivalent of a personal assistant?

I jogged up the short set of steps leading to the chambers front doors , took a fortifying breath before pushing them open and stepping inside.

“Hi”
The sudden voice made me jump with a scream
I whipped around to my left and came face to face with.. my face.

It took me a moment of horror to realise that I should have anticipated that.
Everyone in here has my new face in one form or another.

“Zoete?”
The perky past-incarnation gave a giggle that sounded far too cheerful to suit my new voice.

From what I remember of when we met last time, she can’t really be blamed for being a bit odd.
She died young and never really got out of the ‘giggly, easily excitable’ stage of life experience.
I’m pretty sure if her death hadn’t also triggered her awakening before she breathed her last breath she wouldn’t even be in here in all honesty..

“Hi Boss, your late. The councils through the door on the right.”

My shoulders slumped a little.
There’s no point in arguing with her that I CAN’T be late to a meeting I wasn’t even INVITED to..
She’s got a rather simplistic view of the world from what I’ve seen.

“Thanks Zoete.”
She nodded her head frantically and with another giggle she skipped off to sit on a little stool tucked behind the support column by the doors.
The same column I’d so casually walked past without a thought a moment ago.

I took a few steps towards the door she’d indicated but paused enough to glance back at her.

She’d settled herself comfortably against the column and seemed to be trying to peak from behind it every few seconds with a naughty smile on her face.
She’s probably lying in wait for the next poor unfortunate incarnation to walk through the door so she can scare them like she did me.

I couldn’t help smiling at her.
At least she’s having fun, it must get kind of boring sitting around here just waiting to direct people.
..come to think of it, it must be kind of boring just being an incarnation in general?..

I wonder what they do with their time all day long while I’m busy.. ya know.. having a life?

Questions for another time I guess.
I know Rosaline reads stuff at least, her library seems to be limited to things I have memorised but it’s better than nothing.

The door opened into a surprisingly spacious room with a round table in the center, surrounded by chairs with a diverse range of incarnations sitting in them.
There’s only a few of them here but at a glance they seem to each be members of the different groups who don’t mix too well inside my head.

“Hurry up, we’ve been waiting.”
Ellie gave me an exasperated look and waved toward the open seat beside her.
I went to argue but she used my ‘don’t argue with me’ look somehow.

It’s surprisingly effective, even on me.

When I’d sat down and shared an awkward smile or two with the girls around the table Ellie banged a little wooden hammer on the table for attention.

“Boss is here, time to go over our notes from the formation and the last few days’ business.”
The girls around the table collectively groaned and started shuffling the papers in front of themselves.
“Introductions first.”

Ellie glance at me to make sure I was paying attention, then started quickly pointing at each girl around the table in a clockwise motion.
“The Meretrix Dexi, representing the Roman contingent and the lesser moral brutes..”

She must have seen the look on my face because she glared at Dexi before continuing in an annoyed voice.
“Don’t look at me like that, they CHOSE the name.”

Dexi seemed rather smug for some reason and buffed her nails on her yellow toga-like dress.

“Moving on, we have Hydna of Scione. She’s representing the Greek contingent and most of the girls who worked on or with water in their lives.”
She nodded to me and brushed a string of damp hair behind her ear casually.

I vaguely remember Hydna from the last time I was here and met everyone.
She’d come up to meet me with a larger group of Greek girls but didn’t say much.

Her hair still looks wet, which is kind of weird, I was mildly curious about it last time we met but it’s rather odd that it’s STILL wet for some reason..

“Isabella Bird, representative for the British contingent and the nomads.”
The girl she pointed to seemed oddly pale compared to everyone else and honestly appeared to be more interested in the book in her lap then me or the meeting in general.

I shifted a little in my seat and could just make out that the book was some kind of thick atlas.
It feels vaguely familiar, I think it might be one I looked at back in grade school.

“Representing the Celts, Scottish or otherwise, is Lady M. I’m sure you remember her.”
Everyone at the table smirked a little.
Lady M shot me an embarrassed look and seemed to be trying to tug her skirt down a bit under the table.

If this is the way they’ve been treating her for being stuck in that school uniform I’m going to have to let her out of it.
She’s suffered enough, I wasn’t exactly planning to punish her in the first place..

“Representing the French and the upper-class nobility we have Anise.”
The usually defiant French pain-in-the-ass gave me a bored wave and turned to mutter something to Lady M which made her go bright red in the face.

I shot her a warning look but she just gave me a mild glare back and poked her tongue out at me.

“Representing the Germanic clans and the Eastern bloc we have Greta.”
The surprisingly muscular girl that I specifically remember, ONLY because she gave me a painfully tight bear hug when we met, nodded at me with her tight smile.

Sitting awkwardly in the same type of executive office chair that everyone else was sitting in, she seemed even larger then she had the last time I saw her.
I know she’s technically the same height and body shape as everyone else but her arms are just worryingly muscular when compared to the thin, girly arms of the rest of us.

I’m not being sexist, we’re MAGES!
When have you ever seen a fantasy book, movie or computer game with a muscular mage in it?
..Even the men end up looking more girly then I do most of the time..

Magic is usually at the opposite end of the spectrum, training wise, to the ‘having muscles’ and ‘being in anyway physical’ types of activities.
It’s a stereotype for a reason, mages in general tend to be pretty squishy in the body areas of combat and stronger on the mental forms.

Fena is probably the most active mage I’ve heard of.
Her best spells tend to require some kind of punch or aggressive movement to cast.

I asked her about it, she actually created most of her spells herself.
The movement is directly built into the spells, she factors it into the spell calculations as a force multiplier.
That’s why I was so shocked when her flaming punch failed to break my ice dome yesterday.
Technically speaking, on paper at least, she should have had more than enough power to shatter not just the dome but ME in the process.

I’m still not sure how she managed to NOT kill me honestly.

Even the elemental equations wouldn’t explain it.
If anything fire has a force multiplier against Ice.
If I’d cast a water spell or something then sure, I would have had the advantage, but even THAT wouldn’t be enough to make up for her well-crafted spell.

Especially when mine was cast on instinct compared to her carefully planned and cast attack..

======

“Yoo-hoo, anyone home?”
I just managed to pull my head away before Ellie rapped her knuckles on it to get my attention.
Everyone was giving me sympathetic looks, aside from Ellie who just seemed exasperated.

“..If I may continue?”

My butt shifted slightly deeper into my seat and I nodded to her with what I hope was an apologetic look on my face.
She didn’t give an indication either way and just haughtily turned from me to gesture at the last two remaining girls.

“Blenda, representing the Scandinavian contingent and those who have suffered at the hands of men.”
Blenda was wearing a dress that looked like a more prudish version of the dresses I associate with German bar-maids above anything else sadly.

It’s probably some kind of traditional dress of her people but without open access to her memories within the mindscape I couldn’t tell you what it’s meant to symbolise or be used for.
I just recognise the style from pictures I’ve seen online, it looks the same as the stereotypical bar-maids do in general, just with less cleavage on display and being made from a rougher fabric with a longer skirt.

“..and lastly, Nitocris, representing the Egyptian contingent along with the Arabian Sea cultures and those scorned who sought vengeance.”

Nitocris seems a lot less uptight compared to the last time I saw her.
She was practically a pharaoh in her own time and she’d originally had the haughty demeanour that you would expect to see from one with so much power.

Now she looked calm but like Anise, rather bored about everything going on around her.

“Can we move on to ze point now? Be-fore Sarah wakes up?”
Ellie shot Anise an annoyed look but didn’t argue with her.

We kind of ARE running on borrowed time here, and I’ve still got to find out just how they pulled me from my dream for this meeting in the first place.

“Fine.. I open the floor for new busine-”
Ellie’s words were cut off sharply when Dexi, the roman rep, shot to her feet dramatically.

“NO MORE PANTIES!”

I sunk a bit more into my seat nervously and glanced around the room.
The girls, as a whole, seemed entirely too calm about her shouted statement and were all giving looks that ranged somewhere between exasperated and frustration.

Ellie coughed nervously and shot me an apologetic look.

“We will get to that Dexi, I told you I made it a point to be raised but I won’t do it if you continue to shout out like this..”
Dexi seemed to deflate a little and quickly sat back into her seat with the same look on her face that Sarah used to get when mum told her off for something as a kid.

“Sorry, I promised I’d handle it ya know? The girls are counting on me.”
I almost felt sorry for her with the hang-dog expression on her face but Ellie didn’t let us dwell on the topic for too long.
I think she just didn’t want to let us get side-lined again honestly.

“As I was saying. Any new business?.. no?.. good.”
She huffed to herself and shuffled her papers a little.
“First order of business, a request from the British contingent on propriety, motion seconded by the French. Bella, you have the floor.”

Isabella stood up and turned to me, the others at least pretended to pay attention to her but it was pretty obvious I was the one she would be speaking to directly.

“We, the morally just women of your mindscape, feel that your recent clothing choices have been far too.. risqué.”
To her right I noticed Dexi roll her eyes and a few of the others seemed a bit annoyed about her words too.
“We are part of a long line of proud, noble women who should present ourselves as such. It’s for that purpose, I request that you desist from showing your.. white and dark meat.”
She blushed heavily for some reason.

My mouth dropped.
A few of the girls around the table sniggered at the obviously shocked and confused look on my face.

Ellie leaned on to my shoulder with a poorly hidden smile.
“She means your breasts and your thighs.. it’s a Victorian thing.”
I shrugged her off my shoulder and felt myself flush a little in return.

“It’s not like I planned it or anything. It’s just the fashion these days, Sarah hasn’t helped with those shorts..”
A few of the girls nodded, Bella didn’t look impressed with my argument though.
“..okay, what was the general vote on this point?”

They all looked at me with confusion.

“you know.. that’s the point of having a council, isn’t it?.. so you can voice your problems and vote to see if it’s a majority, minority or rejected idea?”
For a moment no-one said anything, they all seemed to be watching each other to see who would be the first to admit their mistake.

“You all didn’t realise that? It’s pretty much the whole reason I suggested a council in the first place..”
A few of them mumbled something but most of them just seemed a bit embarrassed about it all.

“Okay.”
Ellie softly brought her little wooden hammer down to get attention.
“Votes for the suggested action about Hannah’s recent.. dress code?..”
Isabella’s hand shot up and Anise reluctantly rose hers too.

“Those against?”
Everyone else’s hand rose up in return.

Dexi seemed highly amused by it all, I get the feeling she was the one fighting the idea the most before I got here.
The Roman’s in my head seem to all share a certain.. slack view of morality when it comes to clothing and sex in general..

“Vote deferred, point can be risen again in three months’ time.”
Isabella looked pretty disappointed and slightly annoyed but Anise just settled back in her seat calmly, I get the impression she was only backing it because the ‘French contingent’ wanted to.

“The next point.. we should vote on it before putting it to Hannah this time I guess.”
Ellie shot me a questioning look and I nodded back.
That sounds like a good idea, it will save me some time later down the line at least.

“Point raised by Blenda, seconded by Nitocris. You have the floor Blenda”

“I suggest we take action against John. We know his weaknesses and he’s currently stuck in a passive state due to his brand. We can hit him where it hurts and get revenge at the same time.”
A few of the girls nodded and shot me some cautious looks.

“My proposal is that we look into human transmogrification and turn him into a girl, a young girl, one we can easily defeat in physical combat before exacting retribution.”
Her hard-line stance left me a little surprised, I noticed I wasn’t the only one with that reaction either.
Greta and Nitocris seemed to be in full agreement with her though..

Ellie appeared slightly reluctant to speak for a moment but eventually she coughed nervously.

“Any opposed with points to raise?”
A few of the girls looked at each other but didn’t seem ready to voice their concerns.

I put my hand up.
As much as I’m angry at John and I would love some kind of petty revenge, especially something ironic like turning him into a girl in return, there IS a reason I’ve not just blasted him into oblivion.

“John has wronged me, I acknowledge that, but it’s precisely BECAUSE of the brand you wish to use against him that I feel we should hold off for now.”

Everyone seemed to be focused on me now.
It’s kind of unnerving seeing all those identical looks of curiosity aimed at me.

“The brand was placed on him by old magic. It’s meant to be temporary, holding him back from being able to hurt me physically or taking any form of action which his own conscience considers aggressive or provocative against me.”
The dawning look of understanding on Blenda’s face told me that I’ve probably already got my point across where it matters.
“I need that brand to stay in place, preferably for as long as possible. The moment I take an action against him which my magic considers ‘fair retribution’ for his harming me within the temples grounds he will be released from the brand.”

I glanced around the watching girls with an imploring look.

“I’ve got enough on my plate at the moment as it is, I don’t need him going after me and my family all over again. As it currently stands, he’s neutralised into a mild annoyance.”
A few heads nodded in understanding.
“If I can get a handle on my emotions a bit better, I could even get some fun out of annoying him in return, with him not being able to fight back.. I promise we WILL get revenge on him at some point.. but I just.. I need some time to sort everything out first?..”
The girls all seemed to be considering my words carefully.

The first one to break the silence was the usually quiet Greta.

“Ve only attack enemy while you are strong h’and he is weak, use a ceasefire to build up for war.. da, that is the wise v-ay of a true warrior.”
Isabella puffed up a little in indignation.

“What of honor? It’s underhanded and a foul way to win a battle!”
Everyone, even her recent supporter Anise, gave her a strange look.

“It’s Max, we all have some kind of dealings with him and we all know what he’s capable of.. I’m perfectly fine with cheating to beat him eventually.”
Dexi settled back in her seat and folded her arms self-importantly.

I was a little surprised when Hydna, the Greek water girl, spoke up.
Judging by the looks on their faces a few of the others were surprised too.

“The only honor in war is victory. Any method to attain that honor is worth taking.. at the same time we should not prod the sleeping titan in our midst, Max is a potentially dangerous threat that is currently contained. I say we let him stay contained..”
No-one else seemed willing to speak up so Ellie shuffled her papers.

“The vote to take active revenge on Max.. John..”
She paused and looked mildly annoyed.
“As a side note, can we officially make a decision if we are going to refer to him by his true mage name or his current incarnation? Switching between names is getting annoying..”

Before they could start arguing again I made the decision.
“John, we call him John. It will annoy him more and I honestly can’t help but think of him as John when I see him. After twenty years of friendship it’s kind of a hard habit to break.”

Lady M grumbled something about ‘more like ten years’ but when I glanced at her she didn’t seem ready to repeat it so I let it go.

“John it is, those for revenge now?”
Ellie seemed a little annoyed when no-one seemed willing to raise their hand.
“All opposed?”
Nine hands went up.

After a moment where everyone stared at her Dexi reluctantly put her other arm back down.
She didn’t seem in any way embarrassed for having been so childish though.

“Point unanimously rejected. Open for re-discussion in six months.”

Ellie shuffled her papers again and seemed to be building herself up for her next words.
I think she’s developing a nervous habit or something with all the paper shuffling honestly.
“The final point to raise is from Dexi..”

Before she could reluctantly continue Dexi shot to her feet with a cheer and pointed a finger at my face, her whole pose demanding attention.
“No more panties! Their awkward, and confining and useless and-”
She stalled with a muffled grunt when Hydna reached up and put her hand over her mouth.

Everyone let out a sigh of relief, except for Dexi obviously.

Ellie put a hand up to her face and sighed loudly.
“From what I understand, a lot of Roman women along with the other groups that Dexi represents, including the ex-consorts, entertainers, tribal women and.. well, anyway they all used to go without underwear.. ever since they have started getting flashes of your senses semi-regularly they have been complaining that yours are.. uncomfortable?”

I got the sense that there was another set of words they used to describe them which Ellie was sanitising for my sake.
Judging by the look on Dexi’s face, she thought so too.

“I’m not going without underwear, no matter what.. I can look and see if I can get some looser things and we can see if tha-”
Before I could finish the peace offering my shoulder shook violently to the side.

I almost crashed into Ellie from the force of it.
Just on the edge of my hearing I could detect Sarah calling my name.

“That will do for now, we can discuss this another time, right Dexi?”
Dexi pushed Hydna’s hand away from her mouth and reluctantly nodded in acceptance.
Ellie gave her a warm smile and then glanced at me.

“Go on, before she gets annoyed, thanks for dropping in. It’s been nice to catch up, don’t hesitate to come visit when you sleep next okay?”
She patted my shoulder and let a grin slip across her lips.
“Some of the girls wanted to show you around the things that have changed in your mindscape since you were last here.”

I nodded to her and shot an apologetic look at the girls.
They all seemed to understand why I had to go so quickly at least.

With a mental push I forced myself back out of my mindscape and into the real world.

======

“Hannahhh, Haaannaahhhhh, sleepy sleepy Hannah.. Quick Han, the house is on fire!”

I jolted up in bed with a gasp and wildly swung around to look for signs of danger.
Sarah cracked up laughing, shifting her weight on the bed so she wasn’t practically mounting me anymore.

“I should have guessed using danger would wake you up Han. You’re a surprisingly deep sleeper, is that new? I swear you never used to be like that..”
My eyes settled on her sunny smile and I couldn’t help smiling back.
She seems to be in a really good mood this morning.

She’s also fully dressed.
I didn’t realise I’d slept THAT long.

“Com’ on Han, time to get up. Take a shower while I get breakfast done, then you can do your magic on my hair!”
Without another glance at me she slid off the bed and padded her way out of the room.

If I’m not mistaken she started humming some kind of tune by the time she reached the hallway.

She’s in a REALLY good mood for some reason.
Admittedly I’m not feeling too bad myself, for having woken up repeatedly and then spent the morning in my mindscape instead of dreaming, I feel surprisingly awake for once.

My magic is singing in my lines again, that’s a bit annoying but I’m in a good enough mood to ignore even that problem at the moment.
Not that I have to ignore it.. I’d almost forgotten.

With a single touch I lead a strand of magic from my core and swung it around my lines to collect more and more of the cold magic that had been building up in my body as one mass of raw power.

When it felt like I had enough I cycled it one more time and forced it out all at once.
My body shook with pleasure as the magic poured out of me from every area of my body.

I’ll never get bored of this feeling!
It’s so.. soo good!

The magic’s flow eased off and I collapsed bonelessly back onto the bed with a contented sigh.

I LOVE magic sometimes.
I love this bed.
I love the bumpy ceiling of this room.
I love Edith for changing my dangerous instinctive ice magic into THIS..

I feel all bubbly and happy.
If I could I’d wrap the whole world in a hug right now and never let go.

Everyone should get to feel this good!

======

It took me a moment to realised Sarah was leaning over me with an amused look on her face.

“Are you magic drunk again?”
Reluctantly I shifted on the bed and nodded my head a little in agreement.

For all it matters I might as well be.

I don’t think I want to tell Sarah that when I vent my magic like that it feels more like an intense, extended female orgasm then being ‘drunk’..
I especially don’t want her asking how I know what a female orgasm feels like!

..damn shower monster and his underhanded, yet perfectly shaped, pulsing showerhead..

“I’m okay.. lean a bit closer for a sec.”
She shot me a curious look but dutifully leaned in as if I was going to whisper into her ear.

My hand came up to settle on her head.
With almost all of my magic gone it took virtually no effort at all for me to dip into my lines and light up the three lines needed.
To simulate the surge of wild magic I’d had when casting on myself I pushed a second trail of power into the middle line.
If I’m right that line directs hair regrowth rate, so pumping more power into it should go from fixing split ends to actually growing the hair, like it did for me.

Before she could react my hand swept down from the top of her head to the end of her shoulder length hair.

“Han?”
Sarah sounded worried.
I just smiled at her reassuringly.

I could tell the moment the spell kicked in by the surprised look on her face.
It was kind of fascinating watching her hair grow down her back in rapid succession.

In less than thirty seconds her hair was just a little longer then my own current length.
Although the differences in our height and sizes made it look like we had roughly the same length to my eye.

Not a bad job if I do say so myself.. I thought I’d end up scrimping on the magic too much and having to cast it again but it seems that I got lucky on my first attempt.
Sarah’s mouth was open in shock.

Her hand slowly drifted down her chest following a line of hair that had tangled its way across her front.
Just as she reached the tip of the hair the last part of the spell kicked in and with a slight surge it curled at the ends, smoothing out to settle perfectly around her on all sides.

She gasped, shooting me a wide eyed look for a moment before she broke into a grin and dived at me for a squealing hug.
I managed to get my arms up to catch her but had to grunt when her full weight landed on me making the bed groan a little as well.

“That. Was. SO. Cool!”
Her hand fiddled near my ear for a moment and I could just make out her playing with her new longer hair.
“We have to see what other stuff you can do that’s this useful later!”

She dropped the hair finally and gave me a naughty grin.

Before I could stop her she swooped down and kissed me firmly on the cheek.
Without a moment’s pause she moved over and kissed my other cheek, rubbing her’s against mine to seal the deal.
It really HAS been years since she’s done that.

There was a point where a day wouldn’t go by without her doing her little kiss ritual to thank me for doing the littlest of things.
Admittedly that was back before pre-school, I wasn’t even sure she remembered doing it until now honestly..

“Com’ on Han, breakfast.”
She got up and helped pull me off the bed in the process.

“I’ll be out in a bit. I need a sh-”
Wait a minute..

Sarah gave me an odd look when I lifted my arm and sniffed my armpit slightly.
She REALLY gave me a strange look when I cupped my hand to my nose and breathed out with a sniff.

“huh.. this new diverted magic thing is amazing.. it fixes things, it heals things and it turns out it can clean things too.”
Sarah squinted at me in slight confusion.

“I’ve not had a shower or anything yet but I smell great and I feel clean!”
I stepped closer to her and breathed in her face.

She scrunched her nose automatically but the look eased off a second later.
“Mint?”

With a flip of my hair I gave her an arrogant grin and continued in my best ‘TV advertiser’ voice.
“Minty fresh breath. Try all new ‘Hannah’s vented magic’, it heals, it repairs AND it can replace all your personal hygiene needs.”

HA! Take THAT shower monster!

For the price of a really enjoyable, sudo-orgasm, every morning I’m never going to have to suffer through another shower ever again!
..I’m not sure if I’m more pleased about the ability to avoid awkward showers or the chance to vent magic more often for semi-legitimate reasons..
I think I’ve already mentioned just how GOOD venting my magic feels now..

“None of that Han, breakfast will get cold.”
I jumped a little in surprised but her words shook me out of my thoughts at least.

“Coming.”

She led the way like a conquering hero while I trailed behind, trying to not focus too much on the pleasure still rolling lightly over my body.
I’ve noticed that it tends to take a while to fade away completely, not that I’m complaining.

======

“So, now you’ve done your hair spell on me, what’s the plan for the rest of the day?”
I hesitated for a moment but voiced my thoughts anyway.

If she wants to do something else I can do it later after all.

“I want to clear some space under the elevator to plant a ward stone for the house if you’re up for it?”
She cocked her head to the side and chewed her bacon thoughtfully.

“I’ve heard of those, that’s the big rock thingy’s you put down to hide areas from normal people isn’t it?”
I couldn’t resist a wince at her overly simplified explanation.

While she’s technically correct in that ward stones CAN be used to obscure an area from anyone who’s not magically ‘white listed’ to have access, they do a lot more than that.

You can put practically anything into a ward stone if you’re good enough.
The Babylonians were experts on ward stones.
That’s how they managed to hide the hanging gardens so well.

Hell, the gardens are used to this day by the European magical union as a safe base of operations.

While the place looks amazing and so open, the ward stone it’s built around does everything from filter air, promote plant growth, simulate weather patterns, clean water, maintain masonry, hide the area in general from everything up to global satellites AND they’ve even managed to completely disintegrate rockets that have come a bit too close to the area without anyone outside noticing.

..I’d love to go there someday..

I know you’re not allowed to actually SEE the ward stone or anything but everything I’ve read about the place has people singing its praises for beauty, security and the general environment.

It’s a shame I couldn’t bring Sarah with me if I did go though.
The hanging gardens were a safe haven for mages during some truly dark times, as such, if you don’t have a magical core you can’t come in.
Most normal people who hit the ward line around them get instantly warped to the other side of the line with a minute-long memory charm and a slight confusion hex to send them away from the area.

“Wouldn’t a ward stone be a bit too big for our house?”

I shot Sarah a considering look but shook my head.
The stones are as big or small as you like.
One that will cover most of the forest around our house and even cover the Martials house should be just small enough to fit in the elevator shaft in the kitchen, if I do it right.

“Are you willing to help?”
Sarah shrugged and snagged another piece of bacon with her fork.

“Sure, what else am I going to do with my day? What do we have to do?”
I slid down a little in my chair and glanced thoughtfully at the ceiling.

I’ve got a LOT of calculations to do.
It’s going to take me days to get them all balanced and resolve any conflicts before I’d be willing to start making the stone.
If you mess up a ward stone things can get.. bad.. ‘the whole area your protecting squashed into a small heavy cube the moment someone disrupts your layline power source’ kind of bad.

Luckily I wouldn’t rely on layline power for ours.
I’m not an idiot..

It’s going to take a bit of work to balance an alternative power source though.
I suppose I could attach it to the power of Pan?
He’s the fae king of mountains.
We live pretty near a fair few mountains.

I’m not sure I want to chance drawing the attention of one of the higher powers though..

Power’s be praised, I’ve avoided them so far in this life but some of my past incarnations got on their wrong sides and.. well.. lets just say that one of the girls that Ellie is holding back for me spent most of her adult life as a goat.

I’m SO glad I don’t have to deal with her!
Spend enough time as a goat and you start going a bit weird in the head apparently..

“We need to send the elevator upstairs, then pry the doors open down here. I’ll only clear the area and set the pylon point for now. I need to do some maths before making the actual stone.”

Sarah seemed to perk up a lot more at the idea of playing with the elevator shaft.
She’s always been fascinated by it since we were kids.
Not that I can judge, I played with it just as much as she did.

We never DID find out why mum was so reluctant to let us use it.
I suppose she has her reasons but I don’t THINK she’s afraid of elevators or anything?

“Eat up then. We can have some fun with this after and you can do some more magic.”
Sarah smiled at me and I smiled back.

It’s nice that she’s so interested in seeing me do magic all of a sudden.
It’s even better that we are both feeling so comfortable and close again.

I’ve missed this closeness, I’ve needed it honestly.
I’ve really missed it all a lot actually, now that I think about it..

======

“Elevator up.”
She shot me the same naughty grin she would always do when we played with this thing as kids.

I laughed and rubbed my hands together slightly, more from feeling cold then nerves.
It’s kind of chilly at the moment, the weather finally turned a little I guess.
It probably doesn’t help that Sarah insisted we wear some of my ‘adventurer shorts’ for this.

‘It’s not an adventure without adventurer shorts’.. apparently..

It was kind of awkward when she realised I have slightly wider hips then her though.
I’d not had the heart to tell her that her shorts were cutting into me when I woke up after my change but she’s worked it out for herself now.

She huffed childishly over it but didn’t really seem upset, more amused really.
She made a big scene in a ‘woe is me, the big sister with the smaller hips AND breasts. Fate is a cruel mistress..’ angle.
If she wasn’t grinning throughout the whole thing I would have been a bit worried honestly.

She’s, surprisingly, a pretty good actress.
It probably comes with being on TV or something.

I wonder if the Hub provided her training in that sort of thing?..
It would make sense, from their standpoint at least.

“Stand back Han. I’ll wedge the door open.”

I grumbled at little to myself but didn’t directly argue with her.
I am fully aware that her body is stronger than mine.
She was always physically stronger than me, even when I was still in my male body.

From my position by the kitchen counters I watched carefully as Sarah wedged a screwdriver into the door gap and slowly eased the reluctant doors apart.
We’re kind of lucky the elevator is so old and low budget, I don’t think you can open the doors in modern elevators like this.. at least I hope you can’t?

Sarah’s opening them with worrying ease.
If you can do that to normal elevator doors then I’ve gained another form of transport I’m avoiding from now on!

You don’t want to know how easy it would be for a mage to throw a basic, low level cutting curse at the exposed elevator wires if they could get the doors above one open.
Hell, I don’t want to know and I’m a mage who could do that without batting an eye!

When the doors finally hit their ‘fully open’ limit Sarah grabbed the wedges we’d found in the airing cupboard and slid them into both sides to hold them tight.
She let out a relieved sigh and I copied the action instinctively.

Her eyes seemed to struggle to focus on the bottom of the maintenance pit under the elevator shaft for some reason.

After a moment her body went tense and she let out a surprised gasp.
With a glance over her shoulder she waved me closer.

I cautiously made my way to her side and peered over the edge.

My eyes instantly ached a little, in a way I normally only get when staring at.. oh..
Just to make sure I wasn’t imagining things I pushed a little magic into my eye lines and activated mage sight.

The pit lit up like a Christmas tree with the unmistakeably unnatural greeny-purple shade of wild magic.

Sitting at the very center of the shaft, approximately where I was planning on putting MY new ward stone, was.. a ward stone.
.. correction.. a BIG ward stone..

A big ward stone that seemed to practically GLOW with wild magic at a level that was making my eyes hurt from looking at it, even with mage sight activated..
“Holy crap..”

Sarah pushed my shoulder for attention and glared at me to explain.
I shrugged and stretched out on my belly so I could lean a bit closer to the ward stone.
For a moment I thought I was going to fall headfirst in to the pit but Sarah caught my legs and pushed them back down with an annoyed grunt.

“It’s a ward stone..”

She made another noise at the back of her throat which sounded anything but amused.
“I guessed that much genius, what the hell is it doing here?”

I squeezed my eyes shut tight and ran some calculations in my head.

This thing is OLD.
It has to have been here since we first moved in, if not before that.
There’s no way it could have gathered this much wild magic without having a lot of time to do it.

Wild magic isn’t some common thing you can pick up off the floor, especially in this area.
All the tree’s and nature around our house tends to leave everything with the clinging power of nature magic to it after a while.

Wild magic tends to only appear in deserts naturally.
Even then it’s only because the lack of any other kinds of active magic generated in the area stops anything from drowning it out and diluting it.

Well, I say it only forms naturally in deserts.. either that or at the sites of magic battles?
..Big magic battles..

The kind of magic battles which go down in history as mythic duels between the gods.
The kind of magic battles that tend to scar the very earth they take place on and leave an area wide mix of curses, which can linger for generations..

“This really isn’t the time Han, I can’t hold your stumpy little legs forever.”

A growl rumbled in my throat as a response but I know she didn’t mean anything by it, she’s just confused and worried.
She tends to make comments like that when she’s worried and no-one will tell her what’s going on.

I opened my eyes again and stared hard at the ward stone.
Mentally cataloguing everything about it that seemed in any way important.

“Okay, pull me up.”
She didn’t even bother taking my hand, instead she took the chance to just scoop me up by my waist and lift me bodily back onto my feet.
I think she got some kind of joy from the indignant squawk of protest I gave off.
Her momentary smirk said as much at least.

“So.. this is your area of expertise, what’s the deal with the magically appearing rock?”
I winced at her weak pun, as usual that seemed to only encourage her judging by the little grin she gave off after saying it.

“It’s old, this things powerful. I have no idea what even half of the enchantments on it are.”
My mage sight chose that moment to give up trying to work.
I winced and shut my eyes tightly to stem off the pain.

Having weak lines to my eyes SUCKS!

“I don’t recognise a lot of the languages involved, I can see a few more standard clusters though, at the very least there’s an ill-intent ward on it.”
Ill-intent wards are pretty recognisable, they have to be laid out in a specific pattern no matter what language you craft them in.

It’s always reminded me of a slightly wonky duck.. design wise.
Edith gets annoyed when I describe things like that but it DOES.

Sometimes when I look at a rune cluster it’s like staring up at the stars, I can see patterns and shapes that no-one else seems to be able to see in them.
Fena humoured me enough to look into it but we couldn’t find anything describing any kind of ‘runic pattern reading’ magical traits.

If it IS a real skill then I’m possibly the first person to have it.

“You okay Han?”
Sarah’s hand came down on my shoulder comfortingly.
I pushed my eyes open and squinted at her with a smile.

“I’ll be okay, it happens if I use mage sight too much.”
Her face plainly said that she wasn’t happy with me brushing it off like that.
Time to change the topic I think.

I coughed nervously and shifted my hips slightly.

“It looks like all the important wards I wanted to put up are already in place at least, I’ll have to give my eyes a few days to settle again and then take another look at the stone. I don’t like having such powerful active magic around us without knowing exactly what it’s doing..”
Sarah winced but nodded in understanding.

“Can’t I take some pictures of it for you? Then you could look at the markings on it at least..”

It’s nice of her to offer but that won’t work sadly.
Some of the wards will have left tell-tale signs or markings behind when they were placed but most of them are only visible under mage sight.

That’s under the assumption that her camera could even TAKE a picture of it.

With that much wild magic moving about the stone, the camera is more likely to explode then actually get a clear picture.
I’m not one of those weirdo cultists who believe ‘magic is alive’ or other such rot, but if magic WAS alive then she’d have to be a bitchy teenager with a bad acne outbreak!
That’s what it feels like at least, seeing how little it likes to be photographed.

The only way you could get a clear, useful image of the ward stone would be if..
..Maybe..
If I..

“Your camera won’t work, it’s too modern.. do you think you could find an old film camera somewhere?”
Her eyebrow popped up curiously.

“How old?”

She’s learning.
A few years ago she wouldn’t have thought to ask me that question.

“The older the better. Don’t get an antique though, those are expensive and I’m going to be modifying the crap out of it.”
Her eyes lit up with interest suddenly.

Who knew the way to get Sarah hanging on my every word was to discuss magic of all things?
I always figured she’d be a bit defensive about it, seeing as I can do magic and she can’t.
She’s not exactly got a good history with jealousy after all..

“You’re going to make a magical camera?”
I nodded and squinted my eyes a little more as my eyes flared up in pain again.

I’m tempted to forcefully vent my magic, to get a quick heal out of it, but normal healing magic has never helped with the pain when I strain my eyes.
It’s caused BY my magic, why would my magic fix it?

“That’s so cool! When you’re done with it can I borrow it or are you going to rent it out like the flute?”
I actually closed my eyes this time and brought a hand up to rub at the bridge of my nose.

“Sure, if you can get me two I’ll even make you your own one. It never hurts to have a spare.”
She squealed and bounced on her toes happily.

I huffed and tried to not wince as my eyes pulsed again.
We’re getting distracted from the main thing we should be talking about..

Mums place, our family home for years, has a pretty major ward stone under it!

That’s big.. that’s HUGE.. that’s.. that’s worrying..
We shouldn’t have a ward stone here yet, especially one that’s THAT old.

“You said the ward stone has an ill-intent ward on it right?.. that’s the one that keeps anyone with dangerous thoughts or who want to hurt someone within the ward from coming within range of their victims.. right?”

Pretty much.. ill-intent ward does what it says, it wards against ill-intent.
It’s mostly used to keep dangerous magical creatures away from buildings but it also works well to create a neutral area of non-combat.

If you try to pass the ward barrier while intending to hurt someone inside, it’ll bounce your ass back to Kansas Dorothy, little dog and all!

They’re hard to craft and even worse to power.
That’s why they’re so uncommon despite how useful they could be.
If they were easy everyone would have one.

“Well, if the ward protects from people who mean us harm.. how is John living next door?”

..ah… good point..
Very good point..
A very worrying and confusing point.. but good point nonetheless..

“I guess.. John doesn’t mean us any harm?..”

..wow..
Never thought I’d be able to say THAT sentence with a straight face..

John..
Asshole, ex-best friend who turned me into a girl and branded me after kidnapping Sarah to act as bait John.. HE doesn’t mean us any harm??

My hand came up again to rub at the bridge of my nose.
This time I’ve got a headache and I’m pretty sure it’s got nothing to do with my weak eyes.

Damn it John!
I was just getting used to the idea of hating you.. DON’T make me have second thoughts on that fact!

“Where are you going?”

It took me a second to realise that I’d started walking out of the kitchen while thinking.
After a moment’s hesitation I carried on walking.
I need this.
I need to find out just what the HELL he’s up to!

“I’m going to visit the neighbours. I’d recommend you stay here, just in case.. but I won’t force you.”

Sarah’s face showed her torn opinions on the matter.
I could tell that she wanted to go with me, just as backup if nothing else, but her logic was telling her to stay far away from the powerful mage who has proven to have a.. skewed moral compass.

“If I’m not back in twenty minutes, call Fena’s shop and hide in my new bedroom. I’ve warded the door enough to delay him at least.”
Without another look at her worried face I moved up the stairs and along the hall to the street-side front door.

“I just KNOW I’m going to regret this..”
The door opened easily and my eyes disagreed with the idea of staying open for a moment when faced with the midday sun.

“I swear, the first smug little word out of his mouth, I’m just gonna just punch him and leave..”

The street felt hot under my thin slip on shoes.
For such a cool day, the direct sunlight is surprisingly intense.

In the Martials driveway I could see the extra car parked up.
Just like it has been for the last few days.. at least it’s pretty easy to tell that he’s home..

“Ready or not John-boy, here I come..”

Doing things when you're angry can often lead to more reasons for you to be angry, not always though. Sometimes life just sucks.. Events unfold including but not limited to: Sarah 'sleeping' through important events. (while John watch's over her, but not in a creepy way) And Hannah confronts more then one situation which gets a little out of hand.

The Martials doorbell is exactly the same as it was when I was a kid..

I don’t know why I’m surprised.
It feels like everything on this little Cul-de-sac has been at a standstill since the moment I left.
The only thing that’s changed is me.

Me, Sarah, Mum and.. I guess.. John.
The people changed.
The place though.. it’s a bit worrying how few things have changed here.

It’s been YEARS since I was last here.
At the very least I would have expected their crappy little doorbell to give up the ghost by now!

“I’m round the back, the gates open.”

My teeth grit down hard at his voice.
It seemed to come from the front door rather than the back of the house though.
Just out of curiosity I placed my hand on the door and gave a little magical push.

Oh honestly!
How lazy can you get!

I stomped around the side of the house and pushed open the little gate along the path to the back of their house.

He pushed a pair of sunglasses up onto his forehead with his cocky smile firmly in place.
We stared at each other for what felt like an eternity.
He’s got to be doing it on purpose..

The Martials have a pool in their back garden.
John apparently decided that this muggy, overcast day would be the perfect time to laze around in the middle of the pool, on a neon orange blow-up sofa chair.. in bright blue swimming trunks decorated with little palm trees.. and what looked like a Piña colada in his hand, little umbrella, pineapple slice and all..

He’s even got a bloody curly straw in it!!

Without breaking eye contact with me he moved his mouth a little to the side and snagged the top of the straw.
My eye twitched at the loud sucking sound, he seems determined to finish the whole drink in one go..

His mouth finally left the straw with a slight pop and he smiled at me again.
“Hello Hannah. How can I help you on this fine summer day?.. want to join me in the pool? The waters lovely.”

My eye twitch extended into an aggravated facial tick for a moment.

His eyes were alight with fun.
“No?.. are you sure? Your missing out..”

My irritation seemed to just amuse him ever more the longer the stilted conversation went on.
“Are you seriously using magic as an intercom so you can answer the door while laying out here?”

His free hand came up and gave me a mocking-salute.

“Naturally, I’m using it to keep this chair from tipping over, keep myself dry and my drinks cool too.”
His face shifted into a manic grin I recognise more from his time as my best friend in high school then my reincarnated stalker.

“Plus, watch this!”
He lifted his glass in the air and waved it around.
A second later he let go of the glass and it stayed floating in the air.

Some clinking sounds from inside the house made me turn and stare as a parade of bottles and fruit made their way out of the back door, listlessly bobbed their way over to him and started pouring themselves out in order.
When the bottles had seemingly finished their jobs the glass sunk in the air and nudged his hand slightly until he grasped it.

Fully aware of my awed look, he rose the glass slightly and took another luxurious suck of his curly straw.

“Your serious..”
His mouth quirked up into a smirk but he didn’t stop sucking the straw until the glass was empty.

“ahhh.. the perfect drink every time.”

He didn’t seem at all phased by the look I was giving him.
“How long did it take you to do all this?.. more importantly WHY did you do it all?”
He shrugged his shoulders, seemingly more interested in the bottom of his empty glass then looking at me for a moment.
“That had to be at least a hundred spells, all working in tandem to pull off your little ‘refill’ trick..”

“One hundred and thirteen actually.. and four rough enchantments. You know I’m no good at those.”
He seemed oddly proud of himself.

My instincts are screaming that he’s up to something.
He’s being far too calm and talkative, not to mention goofy!

The John who’s spent the last few years chasing me, the frantic man who turned me into a girl, he would never waste all this time and magic on something as simple as refilling drinks!

He’d sooner summon the bottles and do it himself.. or more likely mesmerise some normal person into making the drinks for him.
His smile is wrong too, it’s not as sharp as the grin ‘Max’ usually gives off.

Right now he reminds me more of my John, before all the magic got in the way, then he has since the day he showed his true self to me in Dante’s throne room..

“What are you up to John?”
He let his mouth fall open indignantly and placed an offended hand to his chest as if he was shocked by my accusing tone.

Again, the action was too playful, too goofy for the Max I’ve come to know and echoed my old John a lot more.

He seemed to give up his little offended act when it became obvious I wasn’t buying it.
“I got bored.”
He shrugged his shoulders, managing to make the simple gesture look somehow overly awkward.
“There’s only so much you can do around here with no-one to hang out with, you of all people should know that Hannah.”

It took a moment for me to realise what was bothering me most about that last sentence.

“You called me Hannah?.. you never call me Hannah..”
He shrugged again and gave me an impish smile.

“I’ve changed my mind. You’re not Arista.”
His smile dipped a little but didn’t fade completely.
“Simple really, I’d call you Al but that really doesn’t suit you in that body.”
My mouth dropped open in shock.
“I like the hair by the way, I think Arista had an incarnation that braided hers in a similar way a while ago but your hair is a lot better. Have you done something with it? It seems longer..”

I stared at him hard, trying to work out what he was planning.
He’s ALWAYS planning something.

“You don’t change your mind.”
He puffed his cheeks childishly but I wasn’t finished.
“You NEVER change your mind, you’re the GREAT Maxarimus! If your wrong then the world BETTER change before you MAKE it change!”

His lips shifted into a pout and he swirled his curly straw around his glass a little.

“Maybe I don’t want to be ‘the Great Maxarimus’ anymore..”
I stalled in surprise.

He’s got to be joking!
..Tell me he’s joking?

What the HELL has gotten into him?!

“When did you start questioning your own psychotic existence?”
His eyebrow perked up and he grinned with a twinkle in his eye.

“When did YOU become a walking magical time bomb?”
His mouth dipped down slightly and his eyes became suddenly serious.
“By my count you’ve let off a small Sun’s worth of magical energy TWICE in the last few hours alone. What the hell’s going on with YOU Hannah. I know it’s not something I’VE done.”
His smile finally left completely and he seemed to sink slightly into thought.
“I spent far too long researching the old magic for it to have been a side-effect I missed..”

I growled at the back of my throat angrily but the emotion wasn’t really there.
He sounds honestly concerned that he might have caused something bad inadvertently.

I can just about feel his magic from the poolside and, like with Trudy before, his magic doesn’t feel like he’s lying.
He really is worried about me..

My shoulders slumped.
It’s hard to be pick a fight with someone who’s being far too nice about everything suddenly!

I kicked off my thin shoes and slid down to sit on the edge of the pool with my feet dipping in the water.
He was right, the water really IS nice..

“I don’t have to tell you anything.”
His eyebrow perked up again and a shadow of a smirk played across his lips.

“Naturally, but you want to. We know each other too well, unlike the rest of these.. non-magical apes.. we understand each other.”
His head cocked to the side and his smirk got a bit more pronounced.

“I’m NOT Arista!”

Just when I was letting my guard down!
I KNEW he would have an angle.
He’s trying to play me because he thinks I’m HER still!
He-

“I know you’re not, didn’t say you were.. recently at least.. what I meant was that we were best friends for sixteen years before all of this.. AND we’re both powerful mages with some of the longest uninterrupted incarnation chains in the world.”
His shoulders shrugged upwards and he sunk into his blow up chair a bit more.
“No-one can understand us. Hell, I barely understand us and I’m one of us..”

For what feels like the millionth time in this conversation I stalled.
He.. he really means that too.. I can feel it in his magic..

“What the hell happened to you John?.. a few days ago you were practically insane. You’re being far too nice at the moment to be considered normal..”
I squinted at him hard for a moment.
“Did you hit your head when you bounced off my blood wards?.. no.. you were still your normal self the day after that.. what the hell is going on?”

He huffed in a deep breath and rolled his head back a little to stare up in the sky.

“It happens.. every once in a while one of us has an incarnation which rejects us to some degree or another.”
His head lolled back down to stare at me thoughtfully.
“Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE Arista. We’re soul mates, and above that she understands me in a way no-one else could.. that doesn’t mean she’s not a complete bitch at times though.”

I snorted in amusement before I could stop myself.

“Some of the best memories I have are of incarnations where Arista isn’t really ‘Arista’.”
His shoulders tense slightly and he let out a gusty sigh.
“I thought you were her.. just playing with me.. she’s done it before.”
The hand holding his drink released it leaving the glass waving casually in the air.
“Pretend to not remember or reject her own identity and then the moment I fall for it she throws a fit and.. well..”
He winced and rubbed his right arm with his now free hand.

“It’s nice sometimes.. after an awakening I tend to forget how bad she can be, how messed up our relationship really is..”
His lips twitched into a small self-deprecating smile.
“When I found out you were the next Arista instead of Sarah I damn near lost my mind with rage..”

He must have noticed my flinch because he quickly continued speaking to reassure me.

“Not for the reason you probably expect.. I was happy with the idea that Sarah would become Arista.. let’s face it, in high school she was a major bitch at times.. she couldn’t even remember my name!”
His eye twitched a little for some reason.
“I’ll admit, it looks bad that I memory wiped you so often, It probably doesn’t buy me any ‘good friend’ points in general but I was doing it to protect you.”
He winced.
“You know what it’s like if a non-mage finds out about magic, you seemed to almost sniff out EVERY damn TIME I used magic. I didn’t want to draw you into all of this..”
His hand rubbed his arm again and he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

“My plans were already too far ahead to change by the time I found out YOU were the new incarnation. Dante would have killed me if I hadn’t at least pretended to give you to him, and Rastalin demanded Sarah to seal the deal..”
He shifted his eyes up to mine with such a lost look on his face.

“I thought you were doomed.. I’d found a friend, a real friend, do you know how rare that is?”
His frown tightened with no small amount of annoyance.
“I can go LIFETIMES with no-one but Arista for company, but I had you this time.. and then you would awaken and SHE would be back.”
His hand nervously came up to push through his hair and got slightly tangled on the sunglasses he’d left up there.

With an awkward smile he put his hand back down and sighed loudly.
“Your little shadow magic trick after you awakened convinced me you were her, the fire blast you let off afterwards told me I had to be more careful then usual too, it seemed like Arista had woken up as a fire mage in a bad mood for some reason..”
He winced, his hand twitching to go up to his hair again but he stopped short.
“I suspected things were wrong, that you might not quite be a normal ‘Arista’, in the temple after you tricked me into getting branded.”

My mouth felt dry.
This is possibly the most I’ve heard him speak in a long time.
What makes it worse is that I can STILL feel his magic, and it’s plainly stating that he’s not lying.. Somehow..

“H.. What made you suspicious?”
I tried to hold it back but my voice shook a little.
It feels like someone has pulled the rug out from under my feet with the sudden change in atmosphere between us.

This ISN’T how this was all supposed to go!

He looked up at me with that same lost look in his eyes and quirked his lips a little as if he wanted to smile.
“You didn’t kill me.”

I could feel my eyes go wide at that statement.
He said it so calmly, as if commenting on the weather.

“Arista, the real Arista, if she’d gone through what you did and she’d managed to trick me into the same position you did.. she wouldn’t have hesitated to kill me.”
His lips twitched up again but he seemed to lose focus on me and stare off at something else.
“We have a messed up relationship.. show me another couple who are as old as we are and I’ll bet they’ll be just as messed up. I still love her, she understands me in a way no-one else POSSIBLY could.. all we have is each other.. but I can’t STAND her at the same time and the feeling is more than mutual..”
His brow scrunched up as if it hurt to speak but he didn’t stop.
I don’t think he could at this point.
“Death is nothing between us. She killed me once for splashing her cloak with rain water from a tree branch. A few years later she tracked down my next incarnation and had the time of her life pretending to be my ‘mummy’ for a while.. then we both died again..”

He shuddered a little and shot me a sad look.
“Talking about it.. kind of brings home just how wrong it all is.”
His hands tightened on the arm of his silly inflatable chair.
“No-one should get as old as we are, it messes you up in the head, makes you into a monster without you even realising it..”

His hands went slack and sunk down into the pool to stroke calming circles in the cool water.

“I pushed and pushed, chasing you, waiting for the moment you would turn around and kill me to prove you were her.. but you didn’t. As time went on I lost sight of that goal, got caught up in the chase.. “
He huffed to himself.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look so open and vulnerable..

“Since the temple.. on the journey back to Klamath Falls I decided to give it all one last try, a final push to prove it all, one way or the other..”
He blushed for some reason.
“I came back here and pushed.. and pushed.. then you showed me..”
His head rose up again and he smiled at me brightly.

“Arista knows sympathetic magic on an instinctive level.. but she’s never been very good with runes..”
His mouth twitched and his eyes lit up in amusement.

“It’s ironic.. one of the greatest sympathetic mages of all time.. and she’s got NO imagination.”
His body shook a little with a suppressed laugh.
“She knows all the runes, she can use them well.. but she could never seem to make something NEW with them. Everything she’s ever done with runes has been done before.”

My eyes were wide in surprise.
“So when..”

He nodded and twitched his lip again, his other hand going down to paddle in the water gently.
“When I bounced off your blood wards and you gave me your little rant I could see it..”
His lip twitched again.
“Those blood wards of yours, they’re custom made to stop me. That’s NEW..”
He carelessly waved a hand through the water.
“Arista.. Arista could never have made something so.. brilliant..”
His mouth finally gave up the battle and became a full blown smirk.

“I can think of only one person who would be smart enough to do something like that, on such a large scale.. without prior planning, all in one night, using BLOOD MAGIC of all things..”

He paddled both his hand a little to push the chair closer to me and ended up bumping his hanging feet against my legs.
I looked up at him and couldn’t hold back my gasp at the honest joy on his face.

“My best friend.. my only friend..”
His magic was bubbling with a strange mix of sadness and joy but not a hint of a lie.
“I thought I lost you Al, I spent years making your life hell and if I had just LISTENED..”

He planted his feet on either side of my legs and kicked off from the pool side a little.

“I.. I’m sorry Al.. Hannah.. whatever.. I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused you. I didn’t mea.. I shouldn’t have done any of it to you..”

My breath was coming sharply for some reason.
As he’d approached me I could feel his magic even easier.

He’s not lying.. he’s not told a single lie this entire time.
I can FEEL it!

I ca.. I can..
I can’t HANDLE this!

Without a thought I struggled upright and broke into a sprint.
Out the back gate, across the burning hot street and up the path to our still open front door.

It felt like I didn’t breathe for the entire sprint over.

I stepped inside the cool darkness of our hallway and pushed the front door shut before sliding down it to rest on the floor with my knees pulled up to my chest.

I can’t breathe.. my magic is bubbling.. I can’t.. I..

“Han?.. Han are you okay? I-“
Before she could finish another word my magic gave up all pretence of control and exploded out of me in an almost physical wave of golden light.

My breath still wouldn’t come.

I needed to pant, the pleasure of releasing my magic was rolling through me and I couldn’t do anything about it.
The edge of my vision became dark.
I barely registered Sarah’s gasp, or her movement to catch me as I sunk face first to the floor.

I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe.. I can’t-

The world went dark.
Mercifully, mercifully dark..

======

“Go away John!”

I groaned and rolled over.
For some reason the bed feels really hard.

Slowly my brain caught up with what happened.
Did I.. did I just have a panic attack?

“She doesn’t want to see you John, just leave!”
Sarah’s shouting.
Why would she be shouting at-

JOHN!

I surged to my feet so fast I went momentarily light headed.
Sarah must have noticed me moving because she came rushing over to my side and offered a supporting arm to stop me from falling over again.

After a moment to gather myself I waved her off and slowly made my way along the hallway to the front door.

John was standing just outside it.
He looked dishevelled, his hair was a mess and it looked like his stupid bright blue swimming shorts had gotten wet at some point.

“Hannah..”
The word almost came out from him as a single hushed breath.

“What do you want John?”

Why is he here? Can’t he just leave me alone!
I need time to process all this.
I don’t get what’s going on!

I know he wasn’t lying earlier.
Magic doesn’t lie, magic CAN’T lie.
You can’t actively hide your emotions from your magic!

Most people don’t even bother trying, it takes a really powerful mage to read other peoples magic.
It takes an even MORE powerful mage to be able to read emotions from the confusing mass of thoughts that make up someone’s magic in any kind of useful way.

As always I’m the weird one, even if it’s a positive thing this time.

“Hannah, you need to hide.”
My eyebrow perked up, I didn’t look at his face though, I can’t right now.
I’m barely holding it all together at the moment as it is.

“You just let off a blast of magic beyond anything I’ve seen in a long time, people will be coming.. if we’re lucky then it’ll just be the Hub coming to bring you in for questioning, if not..”
His hands twitched.

I think he wanted to reach out, to shake me or something, but it’s pretty obvious he was holding back because of my blood wards.
I’m glad I put them up, I don’t think I could handle him touching me right now..

“Han.”
Sarah’s hand rested on my shoulder reassuringly.

“Hannah, I’m serious, run!”
His hands cupped together tightly as if pleading with me to listen.
I stared at them in surprise rather than look up at him properly.

“Run now, get out of here! There’s a shop in town that should be safe, it’s just off Main Street, owned by a woman named Fena. She can protect you.”
For a moment I could feel indignity well up inside me.

I DON’T need protecting!
But.. why is he suggesting I go to Fena?..

“Han?”
The hand on my shoulder twitched but I didn’t look away from John’s tightly fisted hands.

“Damn it Al listen to me! RUN!”
My head jerked up automatically to stare at him.

John’s face was an open book.
For the first time in what feels like forever I can see every thought in his head flying across his face and none of them are comforting.
Panic, fear, worry, desperation.. and anger.

Oh..boy.. he’s REALLY angry!

“Han..”
Sarah’s voice sounded really worried now.
Behind us there was some kind of crashing sound.

I should turn around.
I know I should turn around but it feels like I’m stuck staring at John.

..He really is JOHN right now..
There’s none of the arrogance, cruelty or just plain madness I’ve become so used seeing in his eyes.
There’s no.. there’s no MAX in him.. at least none that wasn’t there to start with.

I know he was awakened young, before we really became friends to start with, so really he’s ALWAYS been Max.. he just wasn’t chasing me, thinking that I was ‘Arista’ at the time
He was my friend instead..

I said we’ve been friends for twenty years before but if I’m honest it’s a bit less than that.

We’ve known OF each other for twenty years, that’s true at least.
We met in pre-school but he was a pretty quiet kid back then.
It wasn’t until the fight that he even registered as anything but a face in the crowd to me..

“HANNAH! This isn’t the time for you to space out!”

I jerked in surprise.
That wasn’t John yelling, that was Sarah?

Slowly I turned to look at her.
She seemed really scared.

Now that I’m paying attention there’s sounds coming from inside the house.
There shouldn’t be sounds coming from inside the house, there’s only two of us here..

Before I could do more then let my sluggish brain consider what that could mean a flashlight came sweeping down the hallway.
It was followed quickly by the muzzle of the automatic rifle it seemed to be attached to the tip of.
After the gun, came the man holding it.

A large man dressed in full SWAT gear with what looked like a thick motorbike helmet on his head and aiming his gun directly at us!

He let off a shout.
There was the sound of people jogging awkwardly and his flashlight was joined by two others.
Another man in bulky SWAT gear and a shorter figure who was possibly a woman.

“Get down on your knees. We’re operatives of the Hub, you’re coming with us for questioning.”

I lifted my hands up to show I was unarmed.
It doesn’t mean much to a mage but it’s the thought that counts.
Well.. the thought and the fact that they have rifles aimed at us of course.

“You will be handcuffed and we will lead you out of the premises.”

I could hear John shift awkwardly behind me, after a moment he huffed and muttered to himself.
“This doesn’t feel right..”

Damn it John, that’s not helping!

Actually.. what REALLY isn’t helping is that, deep down, I agree with him.
Something about this doesn’t feel right.

I’ve not seen any badges yet.
I was told that Hub operatives have to display their badge on first contact with a target.

It’s not just a formality, the badge activates a snapshot spell when you speak your designation.
It’s a safety measure in case you are ‘taken’ while out in the field.. to make it easier for the Hub to find out who killed you..

“Get on your knees and put your hands on your head.”

John hissed in a breath between his teeth.
“Hannah.. run, take Sarah and run.”
He tried to say it quietly but apparently not quiet enough.

The SWAT team moved forward in a rush.
The woman got a hand on Sarah’s wrists while the two men pointed their guns at me and John respectively.

The one aiming his gun at my head reached out and carefully managed to clip a thick pair of handcuffs on my wrists.
The moment they were in place I felt something.. wrong.

My magic disagreed with the handcuffs for some reason.
All the built up magic in my lines was bubbling angrily.

Something’s not right.. something’s not RIGHT!

Before I could react the woman holding Sarah slapped cuffs on her wrists too and promptly bashed her in the head with the butt of her gun.
Sarah crumpled to the floor, unconscious.

“WHAT THE HELL!”

What about the wards?!
They should be protecting us from harm!
How the hell did they manage to hit Sarah!

John growled behind me but there was nothing he could do, I could hear my own growl bubble up in my chest in concert with his.

They hurt Sarah!

A gun aimed at a mage is often more of a formality then anything major.
A gun aimed at John would usually be useless, but if he even twitch’s, it’s pretty obvious these SWAT guys won’t hesitate to pull the trigger on either me or Sarah.
The same goes for me.

I can’t do anything without risking them killing Sarah.

“UP!”
Reluctantly I staggered to my feet, bringing my cuffed hands down to my waist and staring at the man’s dark reflective helmet with anger.

“You didn’t need to hit her..”
The woman standing by Sarah made some kind of laughing sound and took the chance to kick Sarah’s shoulder hard.

My anger flared and my magic shot up, eager to react.

Before it could do anything, hopefully heal Sarah or in the least do some kind of ice attack to rip these ASSHOLES APART!.. the magic I’d built up started draining away.
The handcuffs on my wrist progressively began heating up to a painful level with the more magic I pushed out.
After less than a few seconds I had to reign in my aura just to stop the effect before they started outright burning through my skin!

“Target confirmed, and contained. Moving to evac point.”
The man with his gun aimed at my head moved slightly and gestured down the hallway.
“Lady’s first..”

I glanced down at Sarah’s unconscious body, the anger still bubbling away inside me.

John growled low in the back of his throat but he still couldn’t move.
If it wasn’t for my stupid blood wards being so powerful he could have DONE something by now!
Why did I design them to work against his magical signature alone?

I could have geared them to block all magical signatures but mine.. not that it probably would have helped here.
These SWAT guys don’t come across as mages to me.

“Hannah, don’t.”
I shot John a warning look which surprisingly shut him up.
With one final glance between him and Sarah I sighed.

“Protect her.”
His face scrunched up angrily but he didn’t say no.
His eyes stayed focused intensely on me.

I turned to walk down the hallway ahead of the SWAT guy.

Behind me I could hear John growl low again.
A second later there was the sound of a gong going off and I could hear him bouncing along the street outside.

DAMN IT JOHN!
Why couldn’t he just listen to me!
I HAVE a plan!

..Admittedly it’s not an entirely ‘good’ plan but it’s still a plan damn it!..

“Keep walking.”
He nudged me in the back with his gun, making me stagger a little as we approached the stairs.

With grunts and waves of his gun he led me through the house to the backdoor.
For a moment he paused and brought his radio up to his helmet.

“Alveres, Pedro report in. Are Maxarimus and the spare contained?”
His radio crinkled with static for a moment.

He tensed and brought his gun up a bit tighter to aim at my face.

“Reporting in, Maxarimus is contained, the spare is unconscious.”
I let out a breath I hadn’t realised I’d been holding.

While on one hand it would have been nice to know Max had done something useful by now, at least he’s not made things worse.

“Okay, we’re going for a walk little Lady.”
He waved his gun towards the door and I reluctantly went outside.
We ended up marching through the forest to the right of the golf course.

There’s nothing out here, he’s literally leading me into the middle of nowhere..

“So.. who did I piss off this time?”

If in doubt, talk like an idiot until they spill something they shouldn’t.
It’s surprising how often that tactic works.
The only thing that works better is seduction but like hell I’ll be able to pull THAT off with this annoyingly young looking body..

He grunted and didn’t slow his pace in the slightest.

“You’re with the government, aren’t you? I knew I shouldn’t have put ‘cleaning demon blood out of my jacket’ as a work expense..”
He didn’t crack at all from the joke, not even a twitch.

It would help if I could see his face but those masks are full coverage.
I have no idea how he can even see where he’s going!

I almost missed a step while looking over my shoulder at his face.

His gun jabbed into my back and he let off a grunt.
I’d been a bit too busy to focus on it before.. but thinking about it.. that grunt doesn’t suit him..

As in.. the grunt doesn’t match the voice he’s been using to speak..

To test the idea partly forming in my mind I let my wrists go limp and awkwardly eased my shoulder back until my hand came into contact with his crotch.

He didn’t even miss a step on contact.

Holy crap.. that’s GENIUS..
I mean honestly, completely genius!

Why didn’t I think of that?
With enough of them I could have finished so many missions with a lot less hassle then I used to have!

I’m pretty sure now that he won’t react, as long as I don’t stop walking.
I just need one last test..

Sadly, I’ll have to go for the kill here.
If I’m right it won’t even phase him.. if not.. well, he DOES have me at gun point.
Let’s not forget that, its self-defence at worst.

Counting my steps I took one slightly further forward than normal to keep a relatively even pace.

My foot swung back and impacted with his crotch so hard it went momentarily numb.
As I turned into my next step my handcuffed arm’s swung up and caught him in the throat with my balled fists.

He didn’t even twitch from it!

His gun jabbed lightly into my back and he grunted, giving me another push to start walking again at a steady pace.
I quickly moved to keep ahead of him but my mind was going a mile a minute.

..Holy crap..

Someone did it, someone actually DID it.
He’s a Golem!
They made a Golem that can be controlled, to some degree, remotely!

THAT’s how they got through the ward stone!

Golems don’t have intent.
An ill-intent ward can no more stop a golem then it could stop a flower or the wind!

He’s a golem.. a big, lumbering, stupid golem.
Like Darren, like Lurch.. only BETTER..

He seems life like in his movements.
The other two did as well.

The little voice trick is what threw me off, whoever’s controlling the golems must have at least three people manning the ‘mics’ somewhere.
It can’t be far, the range on those sorts of charms isn’t great.
His walking pace is even too so the golem is the one controlling movement but it seems like his reactions to things are slightly delayed.
..That could be useful to know at some point..

======

We carried on walking deeper into the forest around the nearest mountain to home.
As we walked I tried to gather together everything I’d noticed so far.

I know golems..
I know enough about golems to use this to my advantage.

Judging by the reactions I’ve gotten so far, or more specifically HAVEN’T gotten, they don’t have visuals at least.
They can hear me and can vocalise somehow, possibly by an enchantment on the helmet.

The helmet is probably filtering sound for the golem too, if it was me I’d put a muffle charm on it.
That way only sound directly inside the helmet would be clear to the golem’s ear.

Something this advanced, you wouldn’t want to set it to one owner in case the owner died.

The only way to do THAT would be to make sure that the only clear voice it can hear is from its controller.
They’re able to send the controllers voices out from the helmet, it stands to reason they would be able to send it inside the helmet too, with only a little extra effort.

What else..

They knew when I stopped walking on several occasions.
How did they work that out?
You can’t enchant golems.

The only way they could tell I’d stopped, aside from sound, would be..
The gun?.. The suits?

Something ON the golem must be enchanted to give some kind of feedback.
If they’re smart, it will be aura related.
Even non-mages tend to have a magical aura if they’ve been around magic enough.

I would be a beacon with my magic like this, John would be a pretty close second too.
After the amount of time she’s spent around me, let alone her own adventures with magic, Sarah should be pretty visible as well..

So they’re giving the golems rough directions and relying on the golem’s vision to help them fulfil the commands, meanwhile they’re tracking our positions and listening in.

They don’t need it to be more complex than that.

Even a basic golem like Darren managed to walk prisoners from one point to another.
The others only have to keep Sarah and John at gunpoint until they have me where they want me.

They divided us quickly, made us have to defend each other and drew us into a standstill.

Really clever.. we completely fell for it.
Not that we could have done anything differently even if we HAD seen the ruse for what it was.

“Hey big, tall and silent. We there yet?”
Naturally he grunted.

Got to love golems, they’re nothing if not consistent.

“So.. who’s in charge?”
He grunted.

“It’s not really the government is it?.. because I swear I got told that mage’s don’t have to pay taxes.. I can’t quite remember who told me that, but I’m pretty sure it’s not my fault.. so you shouldn’t be able to.. ya know.. sue me or anything..”
He grunted again.

Well, he’s just a barrel of laughs isn’t he..

“What’s your designation?”
..Grunt..

It was worth a try.
That’s a default command most Golemancer’s leave in to any golems coding.

The trees were finally starting to thin out.
I could just make out some flickering light in the clearing ahead of us.

It looks like I’m about to meet whoever’s running this gig anyway.
After all this, I hope its someone interesting..

Not that I’m looking for hassle or anything but.. this golem stuff is really impressive, a good switch-out that I’d heard would be near impossible to pull off in real life.
I’d hate to think that whoever came up with it was just some two bit thug with money..

Magic’s magic after all, it’s interesting, to me at least.
Finding people who are INVENTIVE with magic.. that’s been surprisingly hard for me lately.
Even with most of my incarnations blocked off, I know too much about magic.

People, mages specifically, tend to get used to things.
They settle into a rut, become comfortable with their own little domains and get stuck in the petty games of mortal life.

Just because awakened mages aren’t technically mortal, that doesn’t stop us from falling into the same traps as well.

If anything, awakened mages can be worse.
They get stuck in patterns of traps.
Repeating their mistakes, their goals, their lives over and over again to varying degrees of success.

I like to think I’m not like that.

My disagreements with my past-incarnations help in that regard.
It gave me the initial distrust I needed to see through a lot of the bull-crap Arista has been feeding the other incarnations for millennia.

“Almost free little lady, keep walking.”
The golem didn’t twitch.

Now I know what I’m looking for its pretty obvious that he’s not the one talking.

“I’m walking big guy. You’re the one slowing us down..”
The golem grunted but his operator didn’t bother to answer me properly either.

The trees are even thinner.
The light source seems to be some kind of torch or electrical light.
There’s none of the flicker I would expect from a candle or open flame and I doubt the light from a fire would be this visible during the daytime, even if it is pretty overcast today.
..that’s something, they aren’t going to sacrifice me straight away at least..

This should be fun!
It almost feels like doing a mission again.

It helps that John is with Sarah.
As weird as it sounds considering our recent history, I know I can trust him to protect her in any way he has to.

“Pick up the pace big guy, I’m not getting any younger.”

With a, slightly forced, happy laugh I jogged ahead of the golem.
It seemed to stumble slightly in something close to surprise but picked up the pace to follow me again.

======

“FIRST!”

Everyone in the clearing, and there’s a lot of them, looked at me like I was some kind of idiot.
The Golem came to a lumbering stop behind me.

After a moment’s pause it drew its gun again and aimed at my back.

“You’re just a sore loser, ain’t ya big guy?”
He grunted.

I’m not sure what I was expecting.
Golems don’t care about things like competition.
They don’t care about anything, that’s what makes them brilliant as servants!

“I just want it on the record that I won our race!”

My cuffed hands swung around, finally focusing on the one short man in a suit standing among a crowd of taller men in suits to my left.
“You, your my witness, I beat your golem in a race. You all suck and I rule, got me?”
He gulped and shot a nervous look around for help but no-one else would look at him.

Perfect.
If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, blind them with bullshit!

“You should be happy, as the official witness to my victory..”
My face darkened into my most menacing look and I cracked off a broken giggle worthy of Theodora.
“.. you’ll be the last one I kill.”

The whole of them.
Every single man, woman and miscellaneous among them flinched.

THAT was satisfying.

It’s a total bluff.. obviously.
I’ve got nothing up my sleeves right now.
If I could get out of these cuffs maybe, but currently.. not so much..

“Pretty nice setup you got going here.. there’s got to be, what? Fifty of you.. all for little old me?..”
My grin turned sharp, like Max at his smuggest.
“I’m touched. I always like a party, who do I get to gut first?”

Thank you Fena for THAT line.
I never realised how unsettling it is to hear someone say the word ‘gut’ in this context before she started talking about it yesterday.

“You, I’m going to call you.. Paula.”

The little man in his big suit flinched when I pointed to him.
He opened his mouth, probably to argue that point but I steamrolled over him easily.

“Paula, who’s in charge around here? I demand to know who has the AUDACITY to attack me in my own home with third rate golems like some kind of coward.”
The little man’s eyes shot around to everyone desperately for help but they were all pretty much stunned into silence.

It’s surprising how effective acting like you know what you’re doing in a no-win situation can put people on the wrong foot.

I’ve had it done to me a fair few times, but over the years I’ve learned to use this tactic to my advantage too.
I’ve literally learned from the best.. my enemy’s..

“I’m waiting Paula!”
The little man actually gave off a frightened squeak this time.

“I’m in charge.”
The deep voice to my right set me on edge instantly.
That’s not the kind of voice that comes from someone who’s easily intimidated.

I turned to the voice and cringed a little at the sight of him.
He’s old, most of the thinning hair on his square jawed head has already turned grey.

His thick moustache quivered with suppressed anger.
His beady little eyes under his bushy grey eyebrows were fixed completely on me.

I’ll admit, the army greens service uniform he was wearing helped make him look a little more intimidating too.
The medals proudly displayed on his chest didn’t help either.

“At arms!”

The previously floundering group of fifty odd assorted security, soldiers and general staff moved like a wave to reach for their weapons.
They mostly consisted of concealed pistols and, for the more military looking people, fully automatic rifles.

In the space of ten seconds I went from one rather dumb golem aiming at me with a rifle to an entire clearings worth of people.
“..well.. crap..”

Even little Paula had reached into his sock and pulled out a dainty pistol of his own.

“Honestly? Do ya really need all those big hunks of metal for little me?.. I’m unarmed.”
My hands came up above my head to show my handcuffs.
“I’m also restrained surprisingly well..”

A few of the guns wavered uncertainly but after a glance at each other they tightened their stances and aimed at me again.

..So much for that idea..

Slowly I turned back to the old General guy with the deep voice.
His stupid moustache twitched in amusement.

..oh buddy.. you don’t know who the HELL your dealing with..

I’ve been in worse situations then this.
No matter what’s happening, how well these handcuffs are restraining my magic or how many guns they have aimed at me, they’re only human..
They’re just.. people.

People trying to mess with me for ungiven reasons, sure, but that just makes them stupid people.

They hurt my sister.
They came into my family home and took me hostage!

They’ve signed their own tickets, simple as that.
It’s not like it will be the first time I’ve killed someone.. make that a lot of someone’s.

I had to wade my way through a South American village’s worth of mesmerised people in order to reach the insane creature controlling them on my last mission, less than a month ago.

I have blood on my hands.
I try to not think about it like that but it’s true.

I’ve killed.

I’ve killed mothers, fathers, sons and daughters.
I’ve wiped out the human population from entire regions to save the rest of the world before.

That’s just personally too, I dread to think what some of my past-incarnations have done.
I know at least one of the ones Ellie holds back was one of the driving forces behind the crusades.

I’ve killed the evil, the infected, the deserving.. and the innocent.. just over the last few years.
I’ve.. I’ve killed children..

I’m not proud of it.
I did what I had to do to protect the world from evil magic and the shadow realm ‘demons’ that would have easily gone on to destroy humanity itself without my intervention.

The main thing.. the key point I’m getting at here.. is that I’m a killer.

I’ve been in worse situations then this by far and I’ve come out of it alive, whole.
Blood on my hands.
Deaths on my conscience.. but alive and whole.

..Which is a lot more then I can say for the other side..

Those people didn’t come for me.
Those people didn’t hunt me down in my own home!

They didn’t challenge me.
They didn’t Restrain me.
They didn’t PROVOKE me.

Most importantly, they didn’t hurt Sarah!
NO-ONE HURTS SARAH!

“General, your obviously feeling like a big tough man about all of this.”
He glared at me as if I’d insulted him in some way.
Thinking about it I probably have but I couldn’t care less.
“I’m going to ask one last question. If I don’t hear what I want to hear, I’m going to kill you.”

The hands holding guns around me tensed again, several of the soldiers shifted their footing.
It all seemed far too loud in the silent clearing.

“Who was the son of a bitch controlling your female golem at my house?”
The General’s arms tensed slightly, but he’s good, he didn’t even twitch his eyes.

It’s a shame his men aren’t quite as skilled in deception.
Almost half the people in the clearing gave some kind of indication, twitching their heads or eyes in the right direction, as a whole it was enough for me to work out what I wanted to know.

Near the back of the crowd, previously obscured by the people around them, were three people in army clothing lying flat out on some kind of slabs wearing helmets similar to the golems.

My eyes moved back to the General.

He tried so VERY hard to not react, but I know the look on my face.
I know that it’s broken better men then him.
I know.. even with this new, too soft, face.. that I look scary when I’m angry..

“I’m going to kill you General. I’m going to do it unarmed, quickly.. and the real insult is that your own men will help me do it.”
He tried to keep his face passive but I could see his hands twitch nervously.

I’ve killed people.

Over the last six years I’ve trained myself, I’ve trained my body and magic to be a weapon.
They took my magic away and thought they were safe.
..stupid people.. why do I always have to deal with stupid, stupid PEOPLE..

Everyone’s attention was focused on the General.
Waiting for his orders, waiting for some kind of reaction from him.

I wouldn’t have a better time to make my move.
A fact that I think even THEY have forgotten at this point is that THEY need ME, alive.

THEY came after ME specifically.

Whoever is in charge of this whole mess, behind the scenes, isn’t going to react well if they try to kill me.
They had their chance to do that.
They took me prisoner instead.

That puts the ball in MY court.

Before everyone could recollect themselves.
Before anyone could even realise I was moving I’d reached a full sprint.

It’s barely five strides to the General from where I started but they felt like the longest five steps I’ve had to take in a long time.

People were moving, guns going back to track on me, but they were too late.

With a push I threw my body into a flat palmed roll and launched my legs up at the Generals wide eyed face.
My legs went in like a spear, perfectly on target, as I knew they would.

Both of my feet crashed into his throat with full force.
There was a snap sound that I could feel through my legs more than hear.
The General twitched.

Before he could take in a single wheezing breath I finished my roll and dived behind his falling body.

He’s a dead man.
I crushed his larynx with that blow.

There’s no way he can get medical help in time now.. not that it’s going to be a problem in a moment.

Predictably, the moment I finished my movement and came to rest behind his falling body the gunfire started.
I could feel the impacts on his chest but they didn’t go through the other side.

It’s as I thought, he’s wearing some kind of bullet proof vest under his uniform.
Lucky that, if I’d been wrong I’d probably be about as much bullet riddled mincemeat as he’s about to be!

My small size helped keep a lot of the fire off me.
I felt a few bullets graze my skin on my arms and legs, even let off an involuntary scream when one pierced straight into my foot and out the other side.
The blood from my wounds was barely noticeable compared to the amount of it coming from the Generals corpse though.

At least three of the bullets had hit near perfect headshots on him.
It’s a messy way to show it, but this is one bad guy who’s not getting up again..

“CEASE FIRE!”

Oh thank the powers!
I’m not sure my improvised meat shield would have held up much longer under that kind of assault.

Planning my next move carefully I went to shift the General’s body slightly so I could see whoever shouted but before I could I felt the cold metal of an unfired rifle touch the top of my head.

Slowly moving my eyes upwards I stared into the blank mask of the golem.

Why golems?!
Why do I ALWAYS forget the golems?!?

“Lay down arms. We’re taking over, your unit failed in its task.”
Whoever was shouting had a strong commanding tone but it was pretty obvious from the grumbles and general noise around me, that everyone else in the clearing didn’t consider him to be their direct superior.

“She killed Fargas!”
The voices around me seemed to gain some strength from that single shout.
I could hear the guns being shifted back around to aim at me under my protective dead body.

I never said my job was glamorous but this is really going a bit too far.
Even I’VE not bathed in the blood of my enemies QUITE so literally before, this guy is gushing like someone’s putting sticky red water through a sieve at this point..

“Your men will stand down or we will make you..”
The new, commanding voice would have convinced ME at least, if I was a soldier.

These guys.. I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume they’re some kind of mercenaries.
They didn’t seem quite ready to let it all go so easily.

It’s a shame.
The General, Fargas, must have been a pretty good leader to inspire that kind of loyalty in a band of mercenaries..

Shame he had to come here and mess with me.
Shame he had to let one of his men HURT Sarah!

I don’t ENJOY killing people.. but in this case I don’t feel particularly guilty over it either.
His men killed him anyway.

..I just kicked him in the throat..

I don’t know why I’m getting so worked up over this.
I’ve spent too long out of combat maybe?

When I was running missions one after the other, I didn’t have time for all the social niceties normal people can have.
I’ve gotten too comfortable now.

I relaxed by being home, being back with Sarah and mum.
Even having John as something other than a real threat..
I relaxed.. and the moment I let my guard down they came to get me!

I’m such an idiot!

I’m the latest incarnation of ‘Arista’ to the rest of the world.
I’m NEVER going to get to relax, not truly, there’s ALWAYS going to be another threat on the horizon.

I didn’t chose this life but it’s here whether I like it or not.

“Last warning. Cease fire, laydown your arms. The Knights will take it from here.”
The guy with the commanding voice sounded cold this time.

He’s not kidding.
I don’t know what he’s going to do but this IS their last warning.

For a long second the clearing rolled in utter silence.

Then someone cocked their gun and moved.
I cringed, pulling my aching body tighter underneath my sticky, smelly meat shield.
Not in fear.. never in fear.

“Idiot..”
I’d barely said it before gunfire started going off.

After a frantic twenty seconds of blasts and screams the clearing fell silent again.

I yelped when the golem shifted its gun from my head and with one thick gloved hand he dragged me into the open by my shoulder.

It wasn’t particularly hard for him to do.
I’m so coated in blood, a mix of the Generals and my own, so much so that I virtually slid across the uneven terrain.

After a few steps he unceremoniously dropped me back to the ground.
I grit my teeth against the pained scream that wanted to come out of my mouth from landing badly on my wounded foot.
With frantic urgency my eyes tracked around the clearing to assess everything.
My mouth ended up dropping open a little with more than a little disbelief.

..That’s a LOT of golems..

It looks like I’ve found my mage, or at least the one in charge of all the magic involved in this stupid situation.

There’s got to be at least thirty golems.
All standing around the clearings edge.
Guns slowly smoking in the breeze.

These are REAL golems, pale lifeless skin with identical body-builder like physiques.
They didn’t even dress them, it’s kind of off putting to see them all standing there naked.. even if they ARE lacking in genitalia.

It makes sense at least, why bother making them seem normal?

These aren’t some kind of distraction tactic or hidden private army.
They were obviously here for one job.. to kill the mercenaries.

I wouldn’t be surprised if that was the plan all along.
If anything I probably helped them by giving a legitimate sounding reason to take out the hired help once the hard work was done.

“Lady Arista, it’s a pleasure seeing you again. It’s been a while.”
A glance at the commanding-voiced guy told me all I needed to know, mostly the fact that I didn’t recognise him in the slightest.

He’s wearing a neatly pressed white suit of all things.
His face seems young with his hair slicked back in a style that reminded me of the old man style that the Storyteller favoured before.

For a moment a cold shiver went down my spine.

It couldn’t be?
He said he would be in contact but for a man who was so good at covering his tracks this doesn’t fit!
I won’t pretend to know what’s going on in the Storytellers head, obviously, but I think I saw enough to get a good measure of him.

He’d be more likely to just send me a taunting note than go through all of THIS!

“I’m sure you’re enjoying it.. that makes one of us.”
He seemed to like my snippy comment a bit too much to be normal, judging by his chuckle.

“He said you were rather mouthy in this incarnation..”
The chill down my spine decided to go sharply cold again.

..He?.. He WHO??

“Don’t suppose this is the point that you tell me all your secret plans and who sent you, is it?”
His eye twitched for a moment but then his face lit up with another smile.

“Not particularly..”

Figures, I NEVER get the talkative bad guys.
Just for ONCE couldn’t I just have one who tells me everything so I don’t have to find it out for myself?!

The ring of golems moved in to surround us.
The commanding-voiced, white suit guy pulled a pocket watch out of his jacket and glanced at it thoughtfully.

“Can I get your name a least? I’m getting pretty fed up of jackasses who don’t even bother to introduce themselves..”
He grinned appreciatively and shrugged a little as if it was out of his hands.
“If you don’t tell me something, I’ll name you myself.. you look like a ‘Barbie’ to me.. possibly ‘Britney’..”

When in doubt, attack a guy’s macho ego.

It never goes wrong.. except when it does.
When it goes wrong guys tend to get a bit physical, in the fists and shouting way if you get what I mean.

It looks like I scored a direct hit against his ego at least.
He grimaced and stared down at his pocket watch hard for a moment.

“You can call me ‘The Handy Man’.”

My mouth was hanging open.
I could feel it hanging open but I couldn’t quite bring myself to shut it.

After a moment to posture he noticed the look on my face and glared at me.

It took less than a second before I started laughing.
What the HELL is wrong with the bad guys in my life?!

First Vlad and his cliché ‘ohh I’m a vampire’ motif.
Then Dante ‘the dandy man’ Dandes with his desiccated corpse look.
Storyteller with his ‘mysterious history teacher’ act.

.. and now this joker!..

I mean.. it’s not just me is it?..
What is it with the evil men in my life and being melodramatic assholes with the need to give themselves stupid bloody titles!

“You’re kidding right?.. that’s not even original!”

He glared at me.
I think I hurt his little evil, macho pride again.. oops.. I feel SOO bad, honestly I do..

He glanced around the clearing at all the golems.
My eyes went around as well, focusing more on the bodies of the mercenaries.. and all the blood.

..So much blood..

Oh.. now THAT’s an idea..
How would I pull it off though?

..I can’t..
I’d need a distraction at best, a miracle at worst.. and some kind of mage to give the final activation too now that I think about it..

These handcuffs are REALLY annoying!

If there were even slightly less effective I could pour magic out freely and ignore the consequences.
As it is the best I could do is mist the area around me with my aura for a moment before it dies out and I lose a hand or two.

I never thought I’d see the day when I really wished John was here!

He could do it.
The distraction AND the activation.

For some stupid reason I actually paused a moment after that thought, hoping against hope that he would come running out of the trees to my rescue.

It’s a stupid idea.
It didn’t work anyway, there’s still no sign of him..

Let’s face it, I’m far from being ‘damsel in distress’ material.

I mule kicked a guy in the throat while handcuffed a minute ago.
You don’t see useless storybook princesses doing that kind of thing.
John’s so far away from being a knight in shining armor too, it’s not even funny!

..That doesn’t stop the fact that I’m kind of disappointed he didn’t turn up when I wanted him to though..
What’s the point of having a stalker if he’s not there when you want him to be?!
At this point, I don’t care if he’s had this sudden change of heart and wants to be my best-est buddy John again, what’s the point of it all when he’s not here and I’m going to die or get kidnapped or worse!

I can’t think WHAT could be worse but there’s ALWAYS a worse in these situations.

It’s not fair!
Other mages don’t have to put up with this crap!
It’s always me!

“What are you planning to do with me? Why did you come here in the first place?”

The idiot in the white suit, calling himself ‘the handy man’ smirked at me casually.
“I said I wouldn’t bother telling you all our plans, he’s right, you really ARE impatient in this incarnation aren’t you?..”
He cocked his head to the side thoughtfully.

“Such a fiery personality too.. he certainly noticed that as well..”
A growl rumbled at the back of my throat.

“WHO THE HELL IS ‘HE’?!”
The handy man flipped his pocket watch out again and glanced at it without batting an eye, as if I hadn’t said a word.

“DON’T IGNORE ME DAMN IT!”
His eyes cut up to stare at me and he smiled.

“Very fiery personality, I can see why he’s interested in you.. aside from the obvious..”
With a casual flick he flipped his pocket watch closed and looked up into the sky.

I could just vaguely hear some loud sound echoing across the clearing, it was muted as if coming from far away like hearing a helicopter in the distance.
Following his eyes I could just make out a speck in the sky coming towards us, slowly getting bigger as it came nearer.

The outline was unmistakable.
A wide heavy looking body, wings that shouldn’t be able to carry its obvious bulk..

“Looks like our rides here. If you would be so kind Lady Arista, I need to restrain you for the journey. It will take but a moment.”
He started walking towards me.

My eyes shot from him to the bulky beast making its way towards us and back again.

He’s serious.
He’s going to take me and fly off with me on the back of a bloody Gryphon!

That DOES it!

Screw my pride!
Screw my clever plans and ideas!

I’ve got nothing left.
I can’t DO anything!

I can take down a normal person in hand to hand combat but this guy’s a mage!
I can feel it!

The moment he gets close enough all he has to do is cast a minor paralysis charm on me and I’m doomed!

If I had my magic I could stop him.
If I had some backup I could escape him.
If.. If.. IF!

Too many IF’s, not enough solutions!
I run, he’ll catch me.
I fight, he’ll stop me.
I..

Damn it!

This does NOT make me the damsel in distress!
I REFUSE to accept that I’m the damsel in distress!

..damn it..

I slowly paced away from him as he followed me at an equally slow pace.
I’ve got nowhere to go, and he knows it.
He’s enjoying my reaction to that fact.

With a deep breath I did the only thing that was left for me to do.
If this works.. I’m not sure if I’ll be happy or annoyed honestly..

“HELP!”

He glared at me.
He obviously doesn’t like me screaming.

Maybe his poor little ears don’t like the sound..
Well tough luck asshole!

“HEEEELLLPPP!!!”
He lunged for me and I threw myself to the side, just out of his reach.

“HELLLL-”
My last yell cut off sharply with a cough as a wave of heat and what smells vaguely like sulphur filled my lungs.

The world suddenly exploded with fire.
I could hear a near continuous series of pops all around me.
Guns started firing from the golems around us and above all that noise.. there came a sound..

My heart soared from hearing it.
The echoing responses that came afterwards made me feel ten.. no, a thousand times better!

Oh you little bastard..
You glorious.. GLORIOUS little bastard!