My Dreams of Spirit Dancer
by Teddie S.

 
After a visit to the Island of Dreams, Luke has found that he does have two spirits. His male spirit is the wolf, and his female spirit is the fawn. He's danced at a Pow Wow as his girl spirit, Little Fawn. And, had thoughts of becoming a girl. But, is his dance partner his special partner?

Caley liked to run to help keep in shape for dancing. She was a really good runner, and could out run most of the boys. And, she liked to do it in the early morning. But, I didn't like her doing it alone and especially in the early morning. And, I've told her so. I'd had another dream where Nora had again warned me that here was a dark spirit around.

Then one morning something startled me wide awake. Caley! Something was wrong. I jumped out of bed, pulled on my jeans, slipped on my shoes, headed downstairs, and ran for the door. My mom saw me, and asked, "Where are you going?"

"Something's wrong. I've got to find Caley."

And, I ran out the door. I knew that this was the time of day that Caley usually ran, and that she ran through the park as part of her route. And, something drew me there. When I got there, there was no one around. I walked around looking. The early morning was very quiet. Then I heard a muffled scream coming from the pine forest that borders the park. I listened trying to figure out the direction that they came from.

I heard the muffled scream again, and headed, at a full run, in the direction that it came from. As I got deeper into the pine forest, I heard the screams again, and I was closer.

Then I saw them. There was a man and a girl. And, the man was trying to pull the girl deeper and deeper into the woods. And, the girl was struggling to get away from him. As I got closer, I saw it was Caley. Someone was trying to hurt Caley.

I found a big stick, picked it up, and ran after them. My heart was pounding. He was bigger than I was, and I had to figure out how to get him without him hurting Caley any more or me. I knew the woods. And, I loved the girl that he was trying to hurt. He was following the trail that ran beside a fast flowing river. The river was also too deep for him to cross. So, I had an idea of where he was going. I took a short cut that I knew, and ended up ahead of them.

As he pulled her down the trail, he rounded a corner where I was hiding behind a tree. His back was to me, I swung the big stick, and hit him in the head. He let loose of Caley, and she fell to the ground. I knew that I had hurt him, but he didn't go down.

He came after me, and I used the end of the stick to punch him in the stomach. He bent over, but kept coming. I swung the stick again, and hit him in the arm. But, he was able grabbed me, and went to hit me. But, he'd opened himself up, and I kneed him in the groin. This time he went down before he could hit me. I may be skinny, but I'm quick.

I figured that I didn't want him getting up. So, I hit him over and over with the stick until I figured that he was unconscious. Then out of anger, I kicked him a few times. And, I didn't care if he was dead or not.

I went to Caley, and she was laying on the ground, near the river, crying. I knelt down with her. Finally I got my breath back, and was able to ask, "Caley. Did he hurt you?"

She just continued to cry. Again I asked, "Did he hurt you?"

She looked up at me, and pointed to her left arm, and whispered, "I think it's broken."

"Take it easy. He won't hurt you again. But, we've got to get you out of here, and some help."

I checked Caley over, and she wasn't bleeding, but her lower left arm was broken. I took out my cell phone, I figured it wouldn't work here, and I was right, I had no signal. I muttered, "Damn it."

I looked over at where he was laying, and he wasn't moving. Then I said, "No one knows that were here. And, we need to get out of here just in case he wakes up. Do you think you can walk if I help you?"

"I'll try.", she whispered.

"You'll have to support your left arm with your right, and it's going to hurt. Think you can do it?"

"With you here. Yes."

I helped her up, and she cried out in pain. But, she got up, and used her right arm to support her left. I helped her slowly walk down the trail and out of the pine forest.

It took us a little while, but as we walked back into the open area of the park, a tribal police car was just pulling into the parking lot, and I waved them down. The officer got out of his car, and asked, "Are you Luke Overfield?"

"Yes. But, get her some help. Some guy grabbed her, pulled her into the woods, and her arms broken." And, I helped Caley sit on a bench. And, sat with her

He picked up his portable radio and said something. Then he asked me what had happened, and I told him. He was quickly back on his radio.

Then he said, "Your mother called and said you left the house in a big hurry after saying something was wrong. We've been looking all over for you. Who's the girl?"

"She's my girlfriend, Caley Tallchief. Can you call her parents?"

Shortly I heard sirens. Quickly there were two more tribal police officers here, and after again telling them what had happened. They wanted me to take them and show them where I'd left the guy. But, I wouldn't leave Caley until there was an ambulance there to help her.

It wasn't long until an ambulance from the fire department pulled in, followed by two sheriff's cars. And, once I was sure Caley was in good hands, and that her parents had been called, I led the officers back into the pine forest.

We followed the trail, and you could see where the guy had dragged Caley. We got to the spot when he and I had fought, and you could see that there had been a fight here. But, he wasn't where I'd left him. I looked for tracks, and something told me to go west, and I did. And, I found his trail through the thickets. He wasn't hard to track.

We must have followed him for a half a mile or more, and he didn't know these woods, as he kept going deeper and deeper into the thicker woods. And, heading for a river that he couldn't cross at this time of year. We found him unconscious, lying face down in a bunch of poison ivy. If I didn't hate this guy so much, I'd feel sorry for him. He's going to itch for a week.

They were going to have to bring some kind of stretcher in to get him out. I knew that the ambulance guys could probably find their way in, as the tracks that the five cops and I had left made an easily trail to follow. But, one of the cops hiked, actually ran, back out with me, he was going to guide the ambulance crew in, and I was going to check on Caley.

When we got back to the parking area, there were two ambulances, eight police cars, my parents, and Caley's parents there. They all came up to me, and Caley's mother asked, "Honey. Are you all right?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. How's Caley?", I replied.

"She has a broken arm, and would you please talk some sense into her? She won't let them take her to the hospital until she knows that you're all right."

I shook my head, and walked over to the ambulance where they were treating Caley. She was laying on the cot inside the ambulance, with her arm in a splint. I went in, and said to her, "Why are you still here?"

"I just had to be sure that you were okay.", she replied.

"I'm here. And, I'm fine."

"Did they get him?"

"Yeah. We found him face down in a patch of poison ivy. Did he hurt you other than the arm?"

"No. He jumped me while I was running, and started pulling me into the woods. Then you came. Who is he?"

"I don't know. I've never seen him before."

"God I was scared."

I wasn't going to tell her, but I was scarred too. Scarred for her. I sat down on the bench next to her and held her right hand. Then one of the ambulance guys said, "Miss. We really need to take you to the hospital now. Who do you want to ride with you?"

Caley looked up at me, and said, "Him."

"Then I'd better go tell our parents.", I said.

I looked up, and our parents were standing at the open back door of the ambulance, and her dad said, "Luke. Go with her, and we'll meet you at the hospital."

When we arrived at the hospital, they wouldn't let me stay with her as they worked on her. So, I sat in the waiting room with our parents, and I filled them in on what happened. When I was done, her mother asked, "Did you really have a dream about what was happening to Caley, and where to find her?"

I just said, "Yes."

Her dad said, "Luke. I'm so very thankful that you found her before anything else happened to her."

"I'm more than thankful.", her mother said. "And, I can't believe that you had that dream. But, Caley has told me that you're special, and I guess you are."

"I was just glad that I could help her.", I said. Then, I said to my dad, "Dad. Why don't we have better cell service? I can't use my cell phone anywhere but close to the casino. I could have gotten her help a lot quicker if we did."

"You know that we've been trying to get them to expand service here.", my dad said. "And, this just may do it."

"I hope."

"I'll bring it up at the next Tribal Council meeting. And, see if we can push the cell company."

About an hour after we'd gotten to the hospital, another ambulance arrived followed by two police cars. I figured that it was the guy that had grabbed Caley. And, I wanted to go hit him some more.

A short time later, two men, in suits, walked into the emergency room, and talked with one of the nurses. After a minute or so, the nurse pointed to us, and the two men walked over. They identified themselves as police detectives, one from the tribal police and one from the sheriff's office.

Then they explained that they were investigating what had happened to Caley, and that they couldn't talk to her yet, but would like to speak to me. And, I readily agreed to talk with them. They also said, that they'd like, since I was underage, to have one of my parents with me. My dad, being a lawyer, said that he would.

We went into a room, and sat. The detectives asked me to tell them my story from the beginning, and I did. They recorded it and took notes. When I was done, the sheriff's detective asked, "You had a dream that she was in trouble?"

"Yes sir.", I replied. "My Guardian Angel showed me that she was in trouble."

"Guardian Angel?"

"Yes sir. I'm two spirted. And, my Guardian Angel is Spirit Dancer."

The tribal detective broke in with, "Jim. It's something that you probably won't understand. But we believe in dreams, and such." Then he looked at me, and said, "Wait a minute. Spirit Dancer. Why is that name familiar to me?"

"She was my cousin. Nora White-Owl. And, we called her Spirit Dancer."

"Your cousin was the girl that was raped and murdered not long ago?"

"Yes sir. Nora White-Owl."

The detectives looked at each other, then at me, and the sheriff's detective asked, "That case is still open. And, you say she came to you in a dream?"

"Yes sir. Like I said, I'm two spirited and she's my Guardian Angel, and I dream about her all the time. And, she came to me while I was sleeping this morning and told me that Caley was in trouble, and where to look for her."

"Do you think that this could be the guy that hurt your cousin?"

"I'm not sure, but she's warned me about a dark spirit being around."

"And, you believe all of this?"

"Yes sir."

"Jim.", the tribal detective said. "Yes he does. Because it happened. I'll explain all of this to you later. Let's go and see if the girl can talk to us yet. And, we have to try and talk to the guy."

Then he looked at me, and said, "You gave that guy quit a beating. And, what you did probably saved the life of your girlfriend, but you risked getting yourself hurt or worse. It was both brave and foolish. But, you may have brought new light to your cousin's case."

"I knew it was dangerous.", I replied. "But, it was the right thing to do, and I had to help Caley. And, I knew that I could do it. And, I really hope that we've also caught the guy that killed Nora."

The detectives asked my dad to go along when they talked to Caley, and he agreed. I went back into the waiting room and sat with everyone else, including White Antelope. Who had arrived while we were gone.

White Antelope looked at me, and said, "Little Fawn. You doubted the bravery that the Eagle feathers said you had?"

"I should have known that you were right about that.", I replied. "But, what about the second feather?"

"Time will answer that."

As I sat, Caley's mother told me that the doctor had talked with them, and that he'd said that there were no other injuries other than the broken arm.

I asked, "So, he wasn't able to . . . ?"

"No honey. He wasn't able to rape her. And, she's been asking for you. But, you'll have to wait until the detectives are through talking to her."

We sat, and waited. About twenty minutes later my dad and a nurse came over to us, and the nurse took me back to see Caley.

As I walked into her room, her eyes were closed, and she had a cast on her left arm. I just stood there and looked at her. Finally she opened her eyes, looked at me, smiled, and said, "Hi."

I smiled back, and just said, "Hi."

I walked over, bent down, and gave her a little kiss. Then we just looked at each other. Finally, she said, "Thanks."

"Thanks for what? I didn't do anything.", I asked.

"Yes you did. You saved me from that guy."

"It was nothing."

"Nothing! That's not what I saw. I think you saved my life."

I just shrugged my shoulders.

Caley frowned at me, and said, "Stop being so modest. The detectives told me that you beat the heck out of the guy and that there's a possibility that this guy is the one that hurt Nora."

"Yeah. It's possible that he is.", I replied

"They also said that you'd had a dream about what was happening to me."

"Yeah. Nora came to me in a dream and told me that you were in danger."

She shook her head, and said, "You know, you really are special."

"Really?"

"Yes. Really. I don't think I'd be here right now without you."

"I've never told you this, but right after I came back from the island after finding my spirits, I took a nap. I had another dream about Nora, and in that dream she told me that a girl had come into my life. And, that the girl would be a special friend and confidant. And to treat her really well, as she would become very important to me.

"And, I know who this girl is. Do you?"

"No. Who is she?"

"You."

"Me!?"

"Yes you. You are very important to me. And, a very special friend. And, now I want you to promise me one thing?"

"I'd promise you anything."

"Good. Then promise me that you'll never run alone again, or so early in the morning?"

She smiled, and said, "I promise that I won't run alone or so early again. But, you know what that means. Don't you?"

"What?"

"That you're going to have to run with me."

Just then, our parents walked into the room. And, Caley's dad said, "Well young lady are you ready to go home?"

"Daddy. I'm more than ready." Caley replied.

I rode home with Caley and her parents, and helped get her comfortable on the couch in the living room. Then I was going to head home, but she wouldn't let me. She wanted me to stay and keep her company. And, I couldn't turn her down.

As I hadn't taken the time to grab a shirt when I ran out of my house this morning, I was still shirtless. So, I asked Caley's mother if she had something that I could wear. She found me a t-shirt that had the casino logo on the front of it.

Caley finally fell asleep, and I went and found her parents in the kitchen. As I walked in, her mother asked, "I was just going to fix lunch. Would you like something?"

"Sure.", I said. "That would be nice. I haven't eaten today."

I sat at the table, and Caley's dad said, "Son. I can't thank you enough for what you've done for Caley."

"Mr. Tallchief.", I said. "No thanks are necessary. Caley is special to me, and I couldn't see her being hurt. And, I just had to do something."

"But, you put your life on the line for her."

"I know. But, she's worth it."

"You know." Caley's mother said. "Caley really thinks a lot of you. And, thinks you're a special person."

"She saw something in me, even before I knew that I was two spirited. And, she's helped me see what a two-spirit person is. Especially the feminine side. And, she is special to me too."

Then we heard a soft voice say, "Hi guys."

We looked, and Caley was standing in the doorway. Her mother said, "What are you doing up?"

"I woke up, and was alone. So, I came and found you guys. Besides, I'm hungry and smelled you cooking."

I got up, and helped her to a chair. Then Caley asked, "Where's Kimi?"

"At grandmother's.", her mother said. "I didn't want her in the middle of all of this. She should be home soon."

We sat, ate, and talked some more. Then her mother said to me, "You know Luke. The more I see you, the more mature you seem. When I first met you, you came across as a typical teenage boy. But, now you seem to have as much maturity as someone much older."

"You know, some of my friends have said something like that too.", I said

"It's like you've matured quickly over the past couple of months." Caley added.

Caley's dad said. "Do you think it might have something to do with finding out that you are two spirited?"

"Maybe.", I replied. "I know that I've been seeing things differently since I found out. And, more so since I visited the island, and also having had Spirit Dancer as my Guardian Angel."

"Maybe you're picking up Spirit Dancers maturity." Caley's mother said. "I know that she was one of the most level headed dancers that I've met. And, everyone looked up to her."

Just then we heard a car pull into the driveway, a car door open and slam shut, someone run up to the door, and run into the kitchen. And, a small voice say, "Mommy. Mommy. Is Caley okay?"

Caley said, "I'm fine Kimi."

Kimi ran over to her sister and gave her a big hug, and then noticed the cast on her arm. And, asked, "What's that on your arm?"

"A cast."

"Why?"

"Because it's broken."

"Can you take it off?"

"No. It has to stay on until my arm heals."

"Oh. Okay. But, you're okay?"

"Yes I am."

Kimi ran off, just as an older lady walked into the kitchen, and said, "I couldn't keep her in the house any longer. She had to make sure that Caley was all right."

"That's okay.", Caley's mother said. "When we rushed her out of the house and dropped her at your house, I knew she was worried. Oh. And, mom. This is Luke Overfield. He's a friend of Caley's. Luke this is my mother, Mrs. Walking Bear."

We greeted each other. Then she gave me a hard look, and said, "You're the two-spirit boy that Caley's told me about. Aren't you?"

"Yes ma'am.", I answered.

"The one that danced as a girl at the Pow Wow a while back."

"Yes ma'am."

She then smiled, and said, "A two-spirit person is rare. And, someone that can dance that well, is very rare." Then looking at Caley, she asked, "So, young lady. What happened to you?"

Caley started with, "You'd better sit down."

"Oh! It's that bad?"

"It could have been. Please sit."

Caley's grandmother sat with us, and Caley went on to tell her the whole story. Even about my dreams.

When Caley was done, her grandmother sat there in shock for a minute, then said, "Granddaughter. The Great Spirit was really looking after you today." Then looking at me, she said, "And, you young man. I owe you a big debt of thanks for rescuing my granddaughter. It would have killed me if anything had happened to her."

I sat there and didn't say anything.

Then Caley's grandmother said to me, "I'm sorry. I think I've embarrassed you." Then looking at Caley, she said, "He's very modest. Isn't he?"

Caley replied, "Yes he is grandma."

"So, he's your boyfriend?"

"Grandma!"

"Honey. You're old enough to have boyfriends. Your mother did at this age. And, I think this boy is a nice young man. And, I hope that you like each other."

"They do mom.", Caley's mother said.

Caley looked at her mother, and just said, "Mother!" Then she got up, grabbed my hand in her good hand, and said, "Come on. Let's go sit outside. I want to get some sun."

I got up, and walked outside with her. Kimi was playing on her swing set, and we sat where we could watch her. We sat there in silence for a few minutes, then Caley said, "I'm sorry about all of that."

"All of what?", I asked.

"My mother and grandmother."

"Well. Aren't we boyfriend and girlfriend?"

She looked at me, smiled, and said, "Yeah. I guess we really are." Then, she kissed me. Not a short one like last time, but a longer one. A really nice kiss.

We held the kiss until we heard a little voice taunt, "I'm going to tell. I'm going to tell."

Caley looked at her little sister, stuck out her tongue, and said, "Go ahead. I don't care. I'll kiss him if I want to." Then she turned to me, and kissed me again.

When we broke that kiss, I said, "I'm not complaining. But, what was that for?"

Caley grinned, and said, "That was the first of the many thank yous that I owe you for what you did today."

"You don't owe me a thing."

"Yes I do. And, I plan to pay it back."

I wasn't going to argue with her. She was the first girl that I'd ever kissed, and her kisses were very nice. She cuddled up next to me, and I just held her. We just sat there watching Kimi play, and she was keeping an eye on us to see if we kissed again.

Finally I said, "Can I tell you something, without you getting upset?"

"I don't think there is anything that you could tell me that would upset me.", she replied.

"Well. I know we're only sixteen. But, this morning when I saw that guy dragging you through the woods. The only thing that was in my mind was that I've got to stop him from hurting the girl that I love."

She sat up, looked at me, and said, "Really?"

"Yes. It's what drove me to go after him, get you away from him, and want to hurt him really bad."

She cuddled closer to me, and whispered, "Little Wolf. I love you too."

We sat there for a long time. It felt good just to hold her.

I little while later Caley's mother came out, and said, "I just talked to Luke's parents. And, would you two like to go with us to the casino for dinner?"

"Sure mom.", Caley said.

Then I said, "I'd better run home and change."

Then we heard Kimi run up to us, and say, "Mommy. Mommy. Caley and Luke were kissing."

Caley's mother looked a Kimi, and said, "Kimi. That's none of your business. Now go in the house. Grandma is going to stay with you while we go out to dinner."

"Okay mommy.", Kimi said as she looked a little dejected, and started walking towards the house.

Then Caley's mother looked at us, and said, "Now. You two. I know you've been through a lot today. And, your emotions are still probably running high. But, if you're going to show your feelings for each other, please don't do it in front of Kimi. It'll just add fuel to her ability to tease you."

"Mom.", Caley said. "You're not mad that we kissed?"

"Honey. Like I said your emotions are probably running high. And, you also probably feel very close to each other right now. And, that may change at some time in the future, or maybe not. So, showing affections to each other is okay, but maybe try and keep it a little private.

"Now, Luke. Would you like me to run you home to change?"

"That would be great. Mrs. Tallchief.", I replied.

On the way home, Caley's mother said, "Luke. I know that you and Caley went through a lot today. And, I think that what you did came out of your love for her. Just remember that you're only sixteen. I know I don't have to say this, but all I ask is that you be good to her."

"Mrs. Tallchief.", I said. "She means a lot to me. And, yes we went through a lot today. And, I promise you that I'll be good to her."

"Thank you. That's all I ask."

The six of us had a nice dinner, especially without our little nemesis, Kimi. She's cute, but can be a real pain. And, it appears that the word is getting around about what happened, because we had a few people stop at our table and talk to us. Most were saying that they were happy that Caley was all right. Some told me that I did a good thing.

The next morning, my mom handed me the local tribal newspaper, and the front page article was about what had happened. I just hope this doesn't get blown all out of proportion.

I talked with Caley that morning, and went over and had lunch with her. She was sore and the cast was bothering her. But, I look at it this way, I just very happy that she's alive and not hurt any worse than she is. We spent the afternoon just talking about a lot of things. And, I also stayed and had dinner with her family.

The following day, after I'd had breakfast, I asked, "Mom. Could you help me dress like a girl?"

"Ah. . . . Well. I guess.", she replied. "What brought this on?"

"I had a dream last night that I was Little Fawn. And, this morning it just feels like I need to be Little Fawn. Like I need to find out what it's like to be a girl. Not just a dancer, but a regular girl."

"Sure. But, all you have are the two dance outfits."

"I know."

"So, do you think we should go shopping?"

"Yeah. I guess we might need to."

"Do you want to go as Little Fawn or yourself?"

"Isn't Little Fawn a part of me?"

"Yes. I guess she is. What I meant was, do you want to go looking like Little Fawn or Luke?"

"I don't have anything to wear that's a girls."

"I may be able to find enough. You do have that one bra and pair of panties."

"Yeah. I even thought of putting them on this morning."

"Do you know where they are?"

"Sure. They're in my underwear drawer."

"Why don't you go and put those on, and then we'll see what we can do."

"Sure."

I ran upstairs and took out the bra and panties.

I stripped, and slipped on the panties. Then the bra. At least now I knew how to put on the bra. I wrapped the bra around my chest, hooked the hook and loop things, spun the bra so that the cups were in front, and slipped my arms through the straps. There I was wearing a bra with nothing for them to support.

Then I remembered the nylons. I'd given them back to mom. So, I called down to her, "Hey mom?"

She walked to the bottom of the steps, so that she didn't have to shout. Looked up at me, and said, "Yes honey?"

"Where are the nylons that I used in the bra?"

"There in the second drawer in my dresser."

"Can I use them?"

"Sure honey."

I walked into my mom and dad's room, and over to her dresser. Looked at all the things that were on it, and wondered what they were for. Then I opened the second drawer on the left. No nylons. But, more interesting things. Then I opened the second drawer on the right, and found the nylons that I'd used. And, other nylons and what I knew to be panty hose.

Just then, I heard the phone ring, and I knew my mom would answer it. So, I started putting the nylons in my bra. My bra? Well I guess it is. Then I heard mom call up the steps, "Honey. It's Caley."

"Okay mom. I'll get it up here.", I replied.

I picked up the phone in my mom and dad's room, and said, "Hi. How are you feeling?"

"Sore. But, not too bad.", Caley replied.

"I worry about you."

"I'll be all right. Thanks to you. But, I need to get out of this house. What are you doing?"

"Ah. Mom and I are going shopping."

"Going shopping. For what? Where?"

"Ah. . . . Something for Little Fawn."

"Little Fawn! Why?"

"I just woke up this morning, and felt that I needed to be her."

"You had a dream. Didn't you?"

"How did you know?"

"Just a guess. But, you do things that are in your dreams."

"Yeah. I guess I do."

"I've got to get out. Think I could go?"

"I don't know why not. Let me check."

I yelled down to my mom, and asked if Caley could go with us. She said that it would be fine. So, I told Caley that it was okay for her to go, and I'd call her when we were ready to leave. Then I went back downstairs, in only my panties and bra, and found mom.

My mom looked at me, put her hands on her hips, and said, "Young lady. You don't run around the house in just your underwear. If your father had been home . . . "

"Sorry.", I said meekly. "But, I don't have anything to put on."

"There's a robe in the bathroom."

"But, that's yours."

"You can use it. Now, let's see what we can find for you to wear."

We went back upstairs and to her room, and she started looking through her drawers. She came out with a pair of shorts and a pretty top. She told me that the shorts were too small on her, but might fit me with a belt. I told you that I was skinny.

I slipped the shorts on and they fit, but were a little loose. So, mom got a fancy belt, and that helped. The top was a really pretty print with short loose sleeves. I turned and looked in the mirror, and smiled. Mom was also smiling, and said, "That's cute on you. Now let's see what we can do with your hair and with some make up."

We went into her bathroom, and she first did my hair by putting it into a girl's style pony tail. She used a really cute tie to hold it in place. Then she looked at my face, and said, "We'll keep this light. But, I want to clean up your eyebrows."

I just let her work. The plucking was painful, but she didn't do too much. I hope. Then she went over my eyebrows very lightly with an eyebrow pencil, then a light coat of mascara on my eyelashes. And, a subdued red on my lips. She stood back, looked at me, smiled, and said, "Take a look."

I looked in the mirror, smiled again, and said, "I do look like a girl. Don't I?"

"Yes you do honey."

"Mom. Why are you helping me do this?"

"I guess, because I love you."

"But, I'm your son, not your daughter."

"Aren't you?"

"Aren't I what?"

"Aren't you both my son and my daughter?"

"I . . . I guess I am. Aren't I?"

"Yes you are. And, I love you. And, I'm willing to help you in any way that I can. I know that trying to understand being two spirited is hard on you, and I want to make it as easy on you as I can."

"Mom. I love you."

"Now, let's get you some jewelry."

We went back to her room, and she dug out a really pretty silver and turquoise bracelet. Then a couple of rings, and a necklace. The necklace was a thin chain, with a silver and turquoise pendant. She looked at me, smiled, then said, "Earrings."

She walked over to her dresser and took a big box out of the bottom drawer. She opened the top and said, "Take out your studs, and pick any pair of earrings."

I looked in the box, and said, "Mom. I didn't know that you had so many?"

"It's a woman's thing."

I looked through the earrings and found a pretty pair that matched the bracelet that I was wearing. They were long, dangly, and made of silver and turquoise. I removed the studs, that I'd worn since just after the Pow Wow, and inserted the earrings. Again a look in the mirror, and a smile.

We were at Caley's house about a half an hour later. She heard us pull in, and walked out the front door. Her left arm was in a sling, and I figured that she'd have problems with the car door. So, I got out of the car to help her. She stopped dead in her tracks, looked at me, and said, "Girlfriend. You are so cute."

I just smiled at her, opened the door for her, and said, "And, so are you."

She got in and asked, "So, where are we going?"

"Somewhere where we can buy some clothes for Little Fawn.", my mother replied.

"Cool. A girl's day of shopping. That will be fun."

"I thought we'd go over to the big mall."

The drive to the mall that mom wanted to go to would take about an hour. It's in the biggest town in the area. So, on the way we just chatted.

At some point, I asked Caley, "You going to the Pow Wow on Saturday?"

"Maybe.", she replied.

"Maybe? Why maybe?"

"I won't be able to dance. So, it won't be as much fun."

"Oh. That's right. Dancing with a broken arm would be hard."

"No kidding."

"But, we'd be together."

"Yeah. That would be fun. And, you could even dance."

"Dance? I don't want to compete."

"I know. But, they're also having a fun dance, and the dancers are going to teach the people who want to learn. It could be fun."

"Honey.", my mom said. "You are a good dancer, and good with people. And, as Caley said, it could be fun."

"Maybe."

"Please?", Caley asked.

"Okay. I'll do it. But, only if you're with me."

"Where else would I be."

Our first stop, once we made it to the mall, was the restrooms. I really didn't want to go into the ladies, but I had to go. And, the two of them really had to do some fast talking to get me in there. But, my mom had said, "There's no way you can go in the men's looking like that." And, she was right. So, I made my first visit to the ladies room, and nothing happened.

Then it was to a restaurant in the mall for a nice lunch. And, it was there that my mom told me that everything we buy today for Little Fawn, I was going to pay for. As I stumbled over the thought of spending the money, she reminded me of the money I had from my casino shares. Then I reminded her that I was saving that for college. She just smiled, and said, "Don't worry."

I decided that I might as well pay for the day. So, after I'd paid for lunch for the three of us, we started shopping. The first place we stopped was a lingerie shop. Caley and my mom thought everything they saw would look cute on me. And, I saw a few things that I had to agree with them on. When we left, I had three bras, and a dozen panties.

We found an upscale shop that catered to teenagers, and we were quickly in there. And, talk about cute things with big price tags. We weren't in there long.

We wandered further down the mall and into one of the nationally known stores. We found the teen section, and they had some really cute things at a reasonable price. There I spent a bunch, and we left there with two pair of short, two skirts, two pairs of girls jeans with fancy embroidery on them, and five tops of various kinds.

Further down the mall we found a shoe store, and Caley admitted that shoes were her downfall. She loved them. We went in, and the first thing I got was a pair of girl's sneakers with pink trim. Then we found a pair of sandals with a one inch heel, and we got those.

We dropped all of our packages at a place that had lockable storage, and wandered the mall window shopping. We looked at all the pretty things at all the women's stores. And, there was a lot of things to look at. We even stopped and looked at the dresses in the windows of a bridal shop.

I could tell Caley was getting tired, so I suggest that we stop at the food court, and get something to drink. Mom and Caley sat, and I went and got the drinks. After we'd been there a little while, mom said, "You girls sit here, and I'll be right back. There's something I want to check on."

Mom walked back in the direction that we'd just come from, and Caley and I sat and talked. Caley asked, "Your mom really sees you as a girl. Doesn't she?"

"I think, at times, she does. She understands the two-spirit thing. And, understands that at times I need to be Little Fawn."

"I think my mom really understands it too. She and I had a talk about it a couple days ago. How much dressing, as Little Fawn, do you think you're going to do?"

"I don't know.", I replied. "I just wanted to do it today. I did have a dream about being Little Fawn. So, I just did it."

"Do you like doing it?"

"Actually. Yes. It feels good. And, so far it's been fun. Now. Let me ask you something. How do you feel about me doing it?"

She looked at me, smiled, and said, "I like it. It's fun seeing you like this. And, to have another girlfriend. And, remember, I was one of the first to figure out that you were special. There was just something about you that drew me to you. And, I'm glad that you like me."

"What's not to like. You're cute. You're smart. You're fun to be with. You like to do fun things. And, I think you like me being two spirited."

"I do. Where do you see that going?"

"I'm not sure. I don't know if Nora has any more plans for me. But, I know that being two spirited is important to the tribe. Like White Antelope is the medicine man. But, I got thinking, when I was sitting with you in the hospital the other day, and for some reason I got thinking about going into medicine. Like maybe as a doctor or something."

"Really!"

"Yeah. I know it's a lot of work. But, I've still got a lot of time to decide."

Just then my mom came back with a bag that had 'The Bridal Salon' printed on it. I looked at it, and asked, "Is someone getting married?"

"No honey.", my mom said. "I saw something in that store when we were looking in the window, and had to think about it. But, I decided to get it. Is there anything else you want to see before we head home?"

"Not me. And, I thing Caley is getting tired."

"Me get tired of shopping?", Caley said. "Never. But, you're right. I am getting a little tired."

"Sounds like we're ready to head home.", my mom said.

As we were walking towards were we'd come in, we walked past another store. My mom stopped, and said, "Would you two mind one more stop?"

I looked at Caley, and said, "It's up to you and how you feel?"

"I'm fine.", Caley said.

So, I said, "I guess one more won't hurt. Where?"

"Right here.", my mom said. "You need your own makeup."

"Huh?"

"How much dressing as Little Fawn are you going to do?"

"I don't know."

"Do you think you're going to stop?"

"From what White Antelope has told me. No."

"We shouldn't share makeup. So, you need your own."

We walked into the shop, and looked around. Then one of the clerks approached us and asked if she could help. My mom told her that I needed all new makeup, both day time and night time. The clerk spent some time trying different things on me. By the time the clerk had found what looked good on me, I'd had a good lesson on makeup. And, she left me with a nice daytime look. I left the store with a lot of makeup. And, I felt like I'd spent a small fortune.

After another stop in the ladies room, we picked up our other packages, and headed home. We stopped at a small restaurant on the way home for dinner. Then we dropped Caley off at her house, and I walked with her up to the door. I think we both wanted to kiss each other, but we saw a little pair of eyes watching us. Caley finally said, "See you tomorrow Little Fawn."

I smiled, and said, "See you tomorrow."

When mom and I arrived home, we carried all the packages into the house, and dad saw us. He shook his head, and said, "I see that my two girls have been shopping. How much did this cost me?"

"Not a thing.", my mom said. "We went shopping for Little Fawn and I told her that she was buying everything."

"Good. She needs to learn what things cost."

I said, "Daddy!" There's that daddy again.

"Honey.", mom said to me. "Why don't you take your packages upstairs, and I'll be up in a minute to help you put it all away."

"Okay mom."

As I started up the stairs, I heard my dad ask my mom, "Why the girl look."

Mom answered him with, "He came to me this morning wanting to dress as a girl. This is just part of him being two-spirited. We all need to learn to embrace it like I think Caley has. And, realize that he's going to be her from time to time."

If there was more discussion, I didn't hear it, as I was up in my room. I took everything out of the bags and carefully laid them on my bed. A few minutes later mom came upstairs and started helping me put things away. Then I asked, "Is dad okay with me?"

"Yes, honey.", my mom replied. "Just realize that he has to learn about your two-spirit just like we do.

"To a Native American, a two-spirit person is very special. They have powers that others will never understand. Some can see the future. Some are healers. A two-spirit person sees things through both a man's eyes and a woman's eyes, and their spirits.

"And, you need to realize, that some cultures look at a two-spirit person completely different than we do. Some will shun them, and worse. So, if you are ever away from your people, be careful who you tell that you are two-spirited.

"Your father will eventually learn that you are special. And, become use to your two spirits. It may take some time, but it'll happen. Your friends all understand you, and I think respect you. I know that the tribe is very happy to have another two-spirit person in it. It makes it spiritually strong.

"You are very lucky to have a Guardian Angel like you do. And, I know it must be hard for you to talk with Nora in your dreams. But, she will be good for you.

"I know it's a lot for you, at your age, but it's good that it started now. You will be able to learn a lot. And, I know that there will be times when your female spirit will be strong, and you'll want to look like you do now. I will never have a problem with it, and your father, is a very smart man, and he will learn to accept it."

"Mom.", I said. "You understand this better than I do. And, what you've said, makes me feel good. Thanks."

We set aside part of my closet and my chest of drawers for my girl stuff. I already had the two dance outfits in my closet, and now there was more things.

Then I asked, "Mom. What am I going to do with all of this makeup?"

With a smile, she said, "Wear it."

"Mom!"

"I have a makeup case that you can use. Or, . . . "

"Or, what?"

"We could get you a vanity."

"Ah. . . . I'll take the makeup case."

As mom was walking out of my room, I said, "Mom. I love you."

She turned, smiled, and said, "I love you too Little Fawn."

I did dress as a girl, other than a dancer, and actually went out with my friends, and Caley. My friends treated me the same no matter how I was dressed. Except, that when I was Little Fawn, they treated me more like a girl, and it was like I'd always been a girl. Caley actually had fun giving me makeup lessons. It was fun to be treated as a girl. And, I did this on a regular basis.

A few days after our shopping trip, I was eating breakfast. And, as I was, the phone rang. Mom answered it, and said, "Hello." . . . "Oh. Hi honey. Feeling any better?" . . . "Good. You'll feel better once the cast is off." . . . "Sure. He's right here. Hang on."

Handing me the phone, mom said, "It's Caley." Like I didn't know.

I took the phone, and said, "Thanks mom."

Then into the phone, I said, "Good morning." . . . "Yeah. Sure. What do you want to do?" . . . "Are you sure you want to do that?" . . . "It's not too soon?" . . . "Okay. I'll see you in half an hour." . . . "Me too. Bye."

My mom was looking at me a little puzzled, and asked, "If I'm not being too noisy. What was that all about?"

"It's okay. She wants to go to the park and walk around."

"I see. Are you sure she'll be okay?"

"She said that she needs to face her fears. And, needs to do it soon."

"And, she wants to do it with you?"

"Yeah. I guess she feels safe with me."

"I can understand that. . . . Oh. And, if you want to tell her that you love her. Just do it."

"Huh!?"

With a sly smile, my mom said, "When you said goodbye just now, you said, 'Me too.' I'll bet she had said, 'Love you.' Didn't she?"

I know I blushed.

Then my mom said, "Honey. Don't worry. It's our secret."

Thirty minutes later I was at Caley's house, and after all the hellos, she and I walked to the park hand in hand. As we walked into the park, I asked, "Are you sure you're going to be okay with this?"

She looked at me, and said, "I have to be. I can't let what he did to me control me. I need to get my life back on track, and I want to be able to come to this park, like we did, and have fun. Now just walk with me."

We walked around the main part of the park, then around the swim lake. We then sat at the picnic table that we usually meet our friends at. We sat there quietly for a few minutes. Then without a word, she stood, took my hand, and led me to a spot just outside of the pine forest.

We stood there for a minute, then she said, "This is the place."

"The place?", I asked.

"The place where he grabbed me. I think he was behind that big pine. I ran past here, and just felt someone grab me. I screamed. He put his hand over my mouth, and pulled me into the woods."

She had tears in her eyes. I held her for a while, and then she said, "Take me to the other place."

"The other place?", I asked.

"The place where you rescued me."

"Are you sure you really want to go there?"

"Yes. I really need to do this"

I took her hand, and slowly led her down the trail that ran along the river that he'd followed. We walked slowly, and you could still see the marks from where she had been dragged. When we got to the spot where I'd hit him with the stick I showed her. Then I showed her where he and I had our short fight, and where I left him when I come back to her.

She turned, looked at me, and gave me a long kiss. When we broke the kiss, she looked at me and said, "I owe you everything."

"No you don't.", I said. "I did it because you were in trouble."

"But, how did you know I was in trouble?"

"You know that I had a dream about it."

"I know. Don't you think that Spirit Dancer might know something about us that we don't even know about ourselves?"

"Yes. Don't you?"

"Yes. Take me to where you found him with the cops."

I led her through the thick pines, to where the cops and I had found him. She looked around, pointed to a spot, and asked, "Is that the patch of poison ivy."

"Yeah.", I said, "He was face down in it."

"Serves him right."

Again, she wrapped her arms around my neck, and we shared a long kiss.

We slowly walked, hand in hand, back out of the woods. When we got back to the picnic table, we sat side by side, I looked at her, and asked, "Have you faced your fears?"

"Yes.", she replied.

"And."

"I'm beginning to like being in this park again. And, when I can come here by myself, I'll know for sure that they're gone."

"Please don't do that until you're sure. And, you know I'll be happy to come with you whenever you want."

Just then a couple of our friends showed up, and walked over to us. Caley said, "Hi. Abey. Hi Kayla."

I knew some of our friends had stop over to see Caley when they had found out what had happened to her, and that she'd talked to some of them on the phone. But, this was first time that we'd been together with any of our friends.

"Hi yourself.", Abey said. "Good to see you out. Are you all right?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. I just needed to come back here and face my fears."

Then looking at me, Abey said, "And, you mister super hero. I hear that you beat the crap out of the guy."

"I'm no super hero.", I replied. "I just did what I had to do to save Caley."

"So, how did you know that she was in trouble?"

"I had a dream. And, my Guardian Angel told me that she was in trouble, and then guided me to where she was."

Kayla then said, "If I wasn't related to White Antelope, I'd say you were crazy. But, knowing what a two-spirit person is all about, I know what you're talking about. He's told us about some of the dreams that he's had. And, it's crazy, but there is something to this two-spirit thing.

"And, I've seen him dressed as a woman a few times. You make a believable girl. He doesn't."

"I didn't know you were related to him.", I said. "But, you know. At first I thought it was crazy too. But, the more I dream about Spirit Dancer and the more I learn from White Antelope, the more I know it's real. I guess you just have to believe. But, it's hard having two spirits. Sometimes I'm not sure who I am."

Caley looked at me, smiled, "Honey. Just be who you feel you are."

"Luke.", Abey said. "I'm just beginning to understand the two-spirit thing. It's beginning to make sense to me. And, seeing you at the Pow Wow that time, looking so much like a girl, and even dancing as one. Made me see that there is something to it."

"I feel it was my cousin Spirit Dancer that was guiding me in that dance. The dress was hers, so maybe her spirit was in it.", I said.

Then I asked, "Guys. Do you think I'm gay?"

Caley said, "What did you say?"

"I said, do you think that I'm gay?"

"God no. You're not gay. Why?"

"I just know that a lot of two-spirt people are gay, or lesbians, or something. And, I just wonder how many people think that I'm gay."

Abey asked, "You don't like boys. Do you?"

"No. Not in that way."

Kayla said, "We've all seen you and Caley together, and the way you two look at each other, there's no way that I'd see you being gay."

"The way we look at each other?"

"You two don't hide your feelings very well. It's obvious that you're more than just friends."

Caley and I looked at each other, and I asked, "It is?"

Abey, smiled, and said, "You know it. I think everyone knows that you're a couple."

I looked at Caley, she smiled, and I said, "Yeah. I guess we are. Aren't we?"

Caley moved closer to me, and just said, "Yes."

We talked some more, and some of our other friends showed up, and we basically went through the same thing that we'd had with Abey and Kayla. Except for the gay question.

My Dreams of Spirit Dancer
by Teddie S.

 
Caley had been abducted, and Luke, because of a dream, was able to save her. And, with Luke's help, and maybe even Sprit Dancer's, the cops were able to apprehend the guy. Caley, Little Fawn, and Little Fawn's mother spend a day shopping. Then Caley needed to face her fears, and she and Luke go visit where she was attacked. And, the gay question was asked and answered.

Finally Caley and I walked back to my house, and we found my mom out back. We sat with her, and she asked Caley, "Honey. Was everything okay?"

"Yes.", Caley replied. "Seeing those places was hard at first. But, realizing that he's in jail really helps. And, of course having Luke with me was a really big help."

"I'm glad honey. Something like that can be really traumatic. But, you have a lot of support."

"I know. Everyone has been really great."

"So Luke.", my mom said to me, "It sounds like Little Fawn is going to the Pow Wow?"

"I guess so.", I replied.

"Do we need to find you a new dance outfit?"

"What's wrong with the white one?"

"You did wear it to the last Pow Wow."

"So?"

"Everyone has seen it."

"Yeah. But, so what?"

"So, it just not done."

"Luke.", Caley said, "It's a woman's thing."

I hadn't noticed the sly smile on Caley's face, until I turned and looked at her as I said, "So, what do we do?"

My mom, as she got up, said, "I'll be right back."

Then I looked back at Caley, and asked, "Just what are you grinning at?"

"Oh. Nothing.", she replied as her smile got bigger.

"You and my mom are up to something."

"No we're not."

"Oh yes you are."

I sat there and tried to figure out what these two were up to.

My mom was back fairly quickly, and she was carrying a garment bag draped over her arm. She walked in front of me, and said, "After the Pow Wow, where you danced with Caley, she and I talked. And, we both knew that you'd want to dance again. And, we figured that you should really have your own dress. So, . . . "

She unzipped the garment bag, and removed a dress from it. I just sat there and looked at it, and did something that I hadn't done in a long time. I cried. I'm a guy, and I cried about a dress.

The dress was beautiful. I reached out and touched it. It was buckskin. It was a white buckskin dress with a lot of fringe work. And, the beading on it was just fantastic. With tears in my eyes, I looked at my mom, then at Caley, and said, "No. You shouldn't have. It's too much."

"Honey.", my mom said, "I knew after I saw you dance with Caley that you were going to dance again. I knew your cousin had more dresses, but I know how special it can be to have your own. Caley and I talked to your aunt right after the Pow Wow, and we decided that you needed to have your own dress to dance in.

"So, I contacted the woman that made most of Nora's dresses, and the three of us met with her. We talked with her about you, and she asked a number of questions. She also said that she had watched you and Caley dance at the Pow Wow, and couldn't believe how you moved. She said it was just like a girl that had been dancing all her life. And, that she would love to make you a dress. If you look closely at the back you'll see your two spirits, a wolf and a fawn, in the bead work. So, . . . "

"But, mom it's too expensive."

"No honey. You deserve this. You deserve to look your best when you dance."

I looked at Caley. She was grinning. And, I said, "And you. You kept a secret this long?"

Still grinning, she said, "It was hard. But, worth it. And, like your mom said, you more than deserve it. Even more now. There's also a new shawl and headdress."

I just sat there shaking my head.

"Honey.", my mom said, "Why don't you try it on?"

I took a deep breath, looked at her, got up, took the dress from her, and slowly walked to the house. As I walked, I was thinking. 'This is just too much. They really shouldn't have done it.'

I walked up to my room, and undressed. I slipped on a pair of panties, and one of my bras. One of my bras? I'm a boy. Why do I have bras? How am I doing this so easy? But, something was feeling good. It was like what I was doing was a good thing.

I found the nylons and stuffed the bra cups. Then I slipped on the dress. It felt so nice. I got a pair of fancy moccasins out of my closet, and put them on. And, just as I was ready to go back downstairs, I heard someone coming upstairs, and mom and Caley walked into my room. I looked at them, and asked, "What's going on?"

Mom said, "We decided that we needed to take some pictures of you in your new dress. So, we decided to come up and do it right."

"Do it right?"

"Do your hair and makeup."

I thought for a second, and said, "Okay. Why not."

"Take the dress off so we don't get any makeup on it."

I took the dress off, and my mom went to work on my hair. But, just as she was getting ready to braid it, she asked, "Do you still have the strings of beads that Mrs. Redcloud wove into your hair for the last Pow Wow?"

"Sure.", I replied. "They're in my top drawer."

"Caley. Honey.", my mom said. "Would you see if you can find them?"

"Sure.", Caley said. As she walked over to my chest of drawers and retrieved the strings of beads out of the top drawer.

Mom then wove the strings of beads into my hair as she braided it. When she was done, she stood back, and asked, "So, how does she look?"

Caley looked at me and said, "That looks very nice. But, you know, with his fine features, his eyebrows need to be thinner."

Mom looked at me, and I was hoping that she wouldn't agree with Caley. But, I was wrong. Mom said, "You know. I think you're right. Let's go to my room, and see what we can do. Little Fawn, bring your makeup case with you."

Carrying my makeup case, I followed my mom and Caley to my mom and dad's room, and suffered the plucking of my eyebrows. When she was done, she said, "Well Caley. Any better?"

Caley smiled, and said, "Much. Much better."

I turned and looked in the mirror, and didn't really like what I saw. They were too thin. Or, at least I thought so. But, I didn't say anything.

Mom was then going to do my makeup, and I said, "Mom. Let me try?"

"Sure.", she said.

I opened my makeup case and took out what I thought I'd need. Remembering what Mrs. Redcloud had done, what the clerk at the makeup store had done, what Caley had taught me, and with guidance from my mom, I started with a foundation to even out my complexion. Then went over my eyebrows with a dark eyebrow pencil to bring them out. Then some mascara to darken and thicken my eyelashes. I wasn't sure about the eyeliner, so I had my mom do that. A lip liner pencil was next to outlined my lips. Then using a little brush I applied a very pale pink lipstick to my lips.

As I was doing this, I was watching Little Fawn appear. I loved what I was seeing. I loved seeing her looking back at me.

Then I looked at mom and Caley, and asked, "Well. How did I do?"

Mom looked at me, nodded yes, and said, "Not bad for a first try. In fact, I think that you look good enough for the pictures."

"You look great.", Caley said. "I think that there's really a girl under that boy."

I put the dress back on. Then Caley tied the choker around my neck. We went back outside, there was a box on the table, and my dance fan was on it. Mom said, "That box is also for you."

I opened the box, in it was the new headdress, and shawl. Both were very pretty. Again, I said, "Guys. This is really too much."

I guess my voice sounded like I was going to cry, as Caley said, "Don't you dare cry. You'll ruin your makeup."

I looked at her, smiled, and said, "I'll try not to."

I ended up posing for a number pictures by a group of pine trees in our backyard. I few standing and a few sitting. And, since mom was using a digital camera, we went in the house and looked at them on the computer. As we went through them, mom and Caley picked out a couple that they really liked. I just looked at the pictures, and still couldn't believe how good I looked as a girl.

Saturday morning I was again sitting in Mrs. Redcloud's beauty shop chair. And, she was working on my hair. This time as she braided my hair, she worked gold ribbons into it. And, then she braided leather over the last three inches of my braids, and left the ends of the leather hang as fringe. And, it looked really cool.

Then, as before, she did my makeup. First a foundation, then my eyebrows. No plucking this time. Then she used a little pink eye shadow. Then the mascara, and a light touch of eyeliner. She outlined my lips, and used the pale pink lipstick again.

When I looked in the mirror, there was that girl again. Smiling back at me. I really liked what I saw. As I was about to thank her, she said, "I have something for you."

"You don't need to do that." I said.

"I know. But, these will look so good on you."

She opened a small box and showed them to me. A pair of earrings, and they were gorgeous. Each one had three pieces of turquoise shaped as teardrops and set in silver, and hanging from each teardrop were two feathers made of silver. She removed the studs from my ears, and slipped the hooks of each earring into the hole. She looked and smiled, and said, "Yes. You are meant to wear these."

My mom, who had been sitting there, looked, and said, "Yes. Those are very pretty."

I turned and looked in the mirror, and they were very pretty. But, I said, "Mrs. Redcloud. I can't accept these."

"Honey.", Mrs. Redcloud said. "I wore these when I danced at your age. These are meant to be seen on a pretty girl. And, you're that pretty girl."

"Thank you. Thank you very much."

"Now don't cry. You'll ruin all of my work."

"Sorry."

"You know. Those earrings that you wore at the last Pow Wow, would really set these earrings off."

"How would I wear two sets of earrings?"

"We'd have to pierce your ears a second time."

I looked at my mom. She looked at me and just nodded yes.

I told Mrs. Redcloud to go ahead. And, shortly I had two piercings in each ear. And. as we were leaving I gave Mrs. Redcloud a big hug.

When we were back home, from the neck down I was still Luke. But, not for long. I headed upstairs to change into Little Fawn. As I ran upstairs, my mom said, "Call me before you put on the dress."

I shouted back, "Okay mom."

When I got upstairs, I went into the bathroom, and looked at myself again in the mirror. I was wearing the earrings that Mrs. Redcloud had given me, and could see the two studs that she'd added. I liked what I was seeing.

I walked to my room, completely undressed, and slipped on a pair of panties, and a bra. I took the nylons and stuffed my bra. Then I called down to my mother and told her I was ready to put the dress on. She said that she'd be right up.

I heard my mom come upstairs, and go into her bedroom. A minute later she walked into my room, and she was carrying the bag from 'The Bridal Salon'. She set the bag on my bed, looked at me, and said, "Those earrings really do look good. Let's replace the new studs with the silver and turquoise earrings that you wore last time. I think they'll look really good together."

Mom removed the studs that Mrs. Redcloud had just put in my ears, and carefully put in the silver and turquoise ones that I'd worn before. There's no mirror in my room, so I couldn't see them.

Then mom picked up the bag from the bridal shop, and said, "I know you're going to be dressing more and more like a girl. And, I think that maybe you need to feel more like a girl."

"Mom.", I asked. "How can I feel more like a girl? When I'm dressed as Little Fawn, I think I'm feeling like a girl feels. And, with Nora as my spirit guide, I really think I am."

"I know honey. But, I don't think stuffing your bra with nylons is what many girls do."

"But, I don't have breasts."

"I know. So, I bought you something when we were out shopping the other day."

I looked at her a little puzzled, as I said, "What?"

She walked over to the bag from the bridal shop, took out two boxes, and set them on the bed. Then she said, "Come on over here."

I walked over, and when I got there she said, "I think that these will feel better than the nylons in your bra. And, if you don't like them, we can take them back."

Still puzzled, I asked, "Mom. What are you talking about?"

She picked up one of the boxes, opened it, and took out something that looked like what I thought a girl's breast would look like. I've never really seen any. Remember I'm only sixteen.

Then I asked, "What are they?"

"Honey.", my mom said. "They're breast forms. They're made to look and feel like a woman's breasts."

I just looked at it.

Mom continued with, "I thought that you might like them. They'll feel just like real ones do."

"Ah. . . . I . . . I don't know." I said.

"Why?"

"I'm not sure. But, . . . I guess . . . maybe I could try them."

"Okay. Remember we can always take them back."

"Okay. I'll try them."

"Take the nylons out of your bra."

I did as she asked. Then she took the form from the box she was holding, and carefully placed it in my right bra. And, as she did, she said, "They have an adhesive on them that will hold them in place."

"They'll come off. Won't they?", I asked.

"Yes honey, they will. It only keeps them from shifting around. And, I only got you a small. I think it will work with your build and age."

Then she took the other form and placed it in my left bra. Then stood back, looked at me, and said, "Those actually look better than the nylons. Let's go to my room so you can see."

I started walking to her room, and just stopped in my tracks. Mom asked, "What wrong?"

"They . . . They moved.", I said.

"I told you that they would move with you."

"But, it feels weird. And, they're heavy."

"You'll get use to them."

We walked over to my mom and dad's room, and I looked in her vanity mirror. It was interesting. They did look better then stuffing the cups with nylons. And, I could see the nipples through the thin material of the bra. Then, I said, "I guess I can try them today and see if I like them."

"Good. I think you'll be happy that you did.", mom said.

We went back to my room, and she helped me put my dress on, and tied the choker around my neck. She smiled, and said, "You look pretty. Very pretty. You finish up. I've got to get ready."

After she left I finished getting ready. I put on the fancy moccasins with leggins, and moved the Eagle feathers from my old headdress to the new one. I made sure that I had everything, my headdress, my shawl, and my fan. And, went downstairs and waited for mom to finish. My dad had some business at the casino, and was going to meet us at the Pow Wow.

When mom came downstairs, she was wearing her fanciest dress, a fancy pair of moccasins, and a headdress that I'd never seen. I looked at her and said, "Mom you look great."

"Thanks honey.", she said. "I just wanted to look really nice today."

A short time later we were getting out of the car at the Pow Wow grounds, and mom helped me put on my headdress. Then we walked into the grounds. Everyone we saw greeted us, and most knew me.

We knew were dad would look for us so we headed in that direction. I was also looking for Caley or really Laughing Maiden. When we got to the picnic table that we usually used, Laughing Maiden and her family were already there. I saw her first, and she looked very pretty. Even though her broken arm was in a sling. She was wearing one of her very pretty dance outfit.

She saw us walking up, came over to us, and said, "Don't you two look great." Then she gave each of us a hug.

"Thanks honey. So, do you.", my mom said. And, she continued to walk towards the table.

Laughing Maiden and I decided to walk around a bit. And, she said, "That dress really looks fantastic on you, and I just love those earrings."

"Me too.", I said. "Mrs. Redcloud gave then to me."

"Gave them to you?"

"She said something about them needing to be seen on someone that's dancing."

"And, you got another piercing."

"Yeah. They thought I'd look good with two earrings."

"You do. You really look fantastic."

"Thanks. You look great too."

Sounding a little down, she said, "Yeah. With a broken arm."

"You'll see. It'll heal quickly."

"I hope, it's already beginning to itch."

We kept walking, and with each step, I could feel the forms move. I thought about stopping and getting something to drink, but we didn't. But, I didn't want to take the chance of spilling something on my dress. Finally we wandered back to the main area, and were there just in time for the Grand Entry. Laughing Maiden didn't really want to do the Grand Entrance, but I talked her into joining me, even if she didn't dance.

We participated in the Grand Entrance with everyone else. I danced and she just walked with me. I figured that she didn't want to dance with her am in a cast. Then we went and sat with our parents to watch the dancing. We got there just in time to watch Kimi dance. This was one of our informal Pow Wow's, so it was a fun time. Everyone was just dancing for a score and not awards.

Kimi looked cute in her outfit, and did really well. I looked at Laughing Maiden, and said, "You better watch out. Kimi's going to beat you one day."

Kimi ran up to us, and said, "Did you see me dance."

"We sure did." I said. "And, you were really good."

"Really?"

"You sure were."

She ran away to find some of her friends. And, I said, "She's sure cute."

"You should try living with her.", Laughing Maiden said.

"No thanks. My older brother was enough."

"How's he doing?"

"Okay I guess. He's off somewhere doing an internship."

"Does he know about Little Fawn?"

"I don't think so."

I saw my dad down by the announcer's area, and it looked like he and a couple of the other guys were carrying some boxes. They placed the boxes right at the announcers stand. And, I noticed he was dressed in his best clothes.

He came up to where we were, and sat with us. And, we watched the rest of the dancers. Then the announcer said that it was time for the fun dance, and that anyone that want to learn Native American dancing was to come down to the arena. Laughing Maiden got up, grabbed my hand, and dragged me down to the area. Maybe she did want to dance tonight. There were a number of people who wanted to learn, and by the time we got down there they were all teamed up with someone. Laughing Maiden and I didn't have anyone. Then Kimi came running up to us, and said, "Little Fawn. Little Fawn. Will you teach me to dance as good as you do? Please."

"Kimi.", I said. "You already dance very nicely."

"But, you dance better. Please."

Laughing Maiden just watched while I spent about a half an hour having fun with Kimi, teaching her some new steps. And, it was fun. Finally the announcer said, "Ladies and gentlemen. Would everyone please go back to your seats. We have something very special to do."

I started walking back towards where we were sitting, but Laughing Maiden took my hand, and said, "Not you."

"Why not.", I asked.

"Just come with me and you'll see."

I was thinking, 'Now what?'

She pulled me over to the announcers stand. I saw my parents, Laughing Maiden's parents, my aunt and uncle, White Antelope, the tribal Chief, all the tribe elders, the tribal police chief, and the county sheriff standing there.

Then it hit me, and I thought, 'No. Please no. I don't want any recognition.'

At about the time we were walking up to the announcers stand, everyone else was back in their seats. I looked at my parents, and said, "I hope this isn't what I think it is."

"Honey.", my mother said. "The Tribal Council wanted to do this. And, we couldn't say no."

"But, mom. I don't want any recognition."

"I know. But, please just go along with it."

Laughing Maiden took me aside, and whispered, "Honey. I love you. I love what you did for me. Let them do their thing. And, it should all quiet down."

I looked at her, and said, "I have you and that's all the recognition that I want. But, I'll do this for you, and only you. But, I want you standing with me."

She smiled, and said, "Try and stop me."

The Chief walked out to a microphone, that was placed a short distance out into the arena, turned to the crowd, and after getting every ones attention, said, "Most of you know that we had an incident here that was kept from becoming worse by the quick actions of one of the younger members of the tribe.

"I could introduce you to Little Wolf. But, I'd be only half right. Little Wolf is a special person, a two-spirit person. If you are a Native American, you'll understand what that is. If not, there is a page in the Pow Wow's program that will explain it. But, a two-spirit person is special to Native Americans. They have the spirit of both a male and female in them. They become our great visionaries, dreamers, and medicine givers. And, even warriors.

"Tonight you will meet Little Wolf, but you will really meet his feminine spirit, Little Fawn. Little Fawn is also a dancer. And, a very good one. And, you may have seen her dancing. But, on the morning of the incident, it was Little Wolf that came to the rescue of Laughing Maiden, when she was brutally attacked in one of our parks. In fact, I'm happy to see that Laughing Maiden is standing here with Little Fawn.

"So, Little Fawn would you please come and join me."

I hesitated, but Laughing Maiden pulled me toward where the chief was, and then stood there with me. There was a big round of applause, and I was nothing but embarrassed. If I hadn't promised Laughing Maiden that I'd do this, I'd be running away right now.

The Chief continued with, "Little Fawn didn't know we were going to do this, and I know that she is a very modest person. So, I'm not going to ask her to say anything. But, from what the police chief has told me, what she did took a very bad man off the streets. And, it appears that this man may be charged in the murder of one of our tribe member's, Spirit Dancer."

You could hear a murmur run through the crowd. And, I saw my aunt start to cry.

Then he went on with, "Native American people don't believe in giving the person being honored gifts, but the person being honored has a Give Away Ceremony. They present gifts to others. Since Little Fawn didn't know about this, her family arranged the ceremony. So, I'm going to turn the microphone over to Little Fawn's father."

My father walked up to the microphone, said, "Thank you Chief." Then he looked at me, and said, "Honey. We are very proud of what you've done. And, you didn't know that this was going to happen. Please don't be mad at us. But, your family, Laughing Maiden's family, and the Tribal Council, felt that you deserved recognition for what you've done."

Then I heard drums, and the singers started singing an honor song. I bent down and whispered to Laughing Maiden, "You don't know how embarrassed I am?"

She whispered back, "I know. But, I'm so proud of you."

I squeezed her hand. When the singers were done, a group of men brought some boxes up to the microphone. And, my mother and father started handing out gifts. They gave some very pretty handmade blankets to the Chief, White Antelope, all of the tribal elders, the police chief, and the county sheriff.

Then they walked over to Laughing Maiden, and gave her a really pretty dancer's fan. She started crying, and gave both of them big hugs. They gave Laughing Maiden's parents, and my aunt and uncle, each a very pretty piece of pottery. Then my dad called up the singers and drummers, and handed each of them a box. The men got a blue one and the women got a pink one. I didn't know what was in them, but I'll bet it was very nice.

My dad went back to the microphone, and said, "Chief. I'll turn it back over to you."

The Chief walked back up to the microphone, and said, "Little Fawn. I want to thank you and your parents for the very nice present. And, again from the Tribal Council and the whole tribe, I want to thank you for what you did. And, I think we're now ready for the closing. But, I'll bet that if the audience stays around after the closing, that the drummers, singers, and dancers, like they usually do, will put on a great impromptu show."

We watched as the Eagle Staff was taken down, and I was confused as they walked over to me, and handed it to me. This is usually carried by a veteran, not a sixteen year old. After one of the elders gave the prayer, and we, the dancers, the singers, the drummers, and the elders, were ready to leave the dance circle. I looked around, and saw one of the veterans that had lost an arm during one of the Middle East wars. Laughing Maiden and I walked over to him, and I handed him the staff. He looked at me, and said, "No. You need to carry this."

I looked at him, smiled, and said, "No. You are much braver than I am. You deserve the honor. But, I'll walk with you."

As we led everyone out of the dance circle, Laughing Maiden walked on one side of the veteran, and I was on the other. When we were out of the circle, the veteran handed the Eagle Staff to one of the elders, turned to me, and hugged me. Then, just said, "Thank you."

I just smiled at him, and said, "No. Thank you."

Just then a couple of the dancers grabbed Laughing Maiden and me, and pulled us back into the dance circle. There were a lot of dancers, singers, and drummers there. We were pushed into the middle of the circle that they made. And, the drummers and singers started. Laughing Maiden and I looked at each other and started dancing. We didn't have our shawls or fans with us, but we danced the Shawl Dance. After a few minutes we were joined by more and more dancers.

As I was dancing, I felt someone guiding me. Was Spirit Dancer here?

Then, everyone danced the Round Dance. And, as we were dancing, Kimi came running out to us and joined in. She was cute, as usual, and she danced really well.

The impromptu dancing probably lasted a good half an hour. Once it broke up, I took Laughing Maiden and Kimi to get something to drink. And, Kimi walked between us, holding our hands. We saw a lot of people, and got a lot of smiles.

After we were back with our parents, I said, "You know I'm mad at all of you for pulling this." Then I looked at Laughing Maiden, pointed at her, and said, "And, I'm especially mad at you."

She just grinned at me. Then Laughing Maiden's mother said, "Honey. You probably saved our daughter's life. And, there's no way that we can thank you enough."

I just looked at her, then said, "Just having Laughing Maiden here is enough thanks."

Just then the Chief and a couple of the elders walked up, and the Chief said, "Little Fawn. Again, I want to thank you, from the whole tribe, for what you did. If there's anything that we can do for you just ask."

"Thank you Chief.", I replied. "I will."

Laughing Maiden and I then took a little walk to say good night. As we walked, I said, "My mother got me something strange."

"What?", she said. "The breast forms."

"You knew!?"

"Yes. We talked about it after she'd purchased them. She was worried that you'd be upset that she got them. I told her, that you might be surprised, but not upset. Was I right?"

I looked at her, shook my head, and asked, "You're getting to know me too well."

She smiled, and said, "Do you really mind that I know you so well?"

I pulled her close, kissed her, and said, "Yes."

"Liar.", she said. And she returned the kiss. A nice long kiss.

On the way home, there was one of the programs from tonight laying on the backseat of the car. I usually don't bother to look at these, as they are usually the same. But, I picked it up and started looking through it. When I turned to the middle, there was a full page picture. A full page picture of me. Me in my new dress sitting on the ground by a group of pine trees in my backyard. The opposite page was the detailed description of what a two-spirit person is.

I wasn't mad. But, I wasn't happy. And, I said, "Mom. Is this picture in the program why you took the pictures?"

She turned and looked at me, and said, "Yes and no. They wanted a picture of Little Fawn for the program. And, I also thought that it would be fun to have some for ourselves. And, Caley wanted one too. Why?"

"I just wish I'd know about all of this beforehand."

"Would you have come?"

"Probably not."

"Are you sorry that you did?"

"No. Not really. I had fun, but didn't like getting embarrassed. And, I think all of those gifts cost you too much."

After we'd gotten home, my mom was in my room and helping me out of the dress, and I said, "Mom. I really like them."

"Like what honey?", she asked.

"The breast forms."

"I thought you would."

"They felt a lot better than the nylons. And, it was like they became part of me."

"When you remove them. Be sure you place them back in their boxes to protect them."

The following Tuesday, when I came down for breakfast, my dad was still home, and I asked, "Dad. Why are you still home?"

"We got a call from the tribal police this morning.", my dad said.

"Oh?"

"They want to meet with us, the Tallchief's, and your aunt and uncle at ten. They have some news for us."

"Oh?"

"I guess they've found out something about the guy that attacked Caley."

"This could be interesting."

"Yes it could."

Just before ten we were walking into the tribal police department. My aunt and uncle were already there. And, Caley and her family joined us soon afterwards. The two detectives that we'd spoken to at the hospital came out and took us back to a conference room. Both the county sheriff and the tribal police chief were waiting for us. As was another man.

After all the introductions, in which we found out the other man was an FBI Special Agent, the tribal police chief got up, and said, "We have some very good news for you." Then looking at me, he continues with, "But, first, Little Wolf, we want to thank you for what you did to save Miss Tallchief. If you hadn't have acted as you did, there's no telling what would have happened. Some of what we're going to tell you won't be released to the public until the trial."

"Trial.", Caley said.

"Yes Miss. The man that attacked you will be going to trial."

"So, she'll have to testify?", my dad asked.

"Maybe not. But, we'll get to that." Then the police chief looked at the two detectives, and said, "Gentlemen. The floor is all yours."

The two detectives stood, and the one from the tribal police department, said, "Thank you chief.

"First. We tracked down a lot of information on the man that attacked Miss Tallchief. And, it appears that he is a serial rapist. When we found where he was living and obtained a search warrant, we found a number of interesting things. He kept information on all the girls that he'd raped. So, we were able to contact other police departments, and they are really interested in him when we're through with him.

"We also found a number of pictures of Miss Tallchief and Little Fawn taken at one of the Pow Wows, and other places. So, it appeared that he had been stalking her for a while. We think he was also interested in Little Fawn, but couldn't track her down. Only because, Little Fawn was really Mr. Overfield.

"There were a lot of notes about him following Miss Tallchief, and in particular about her early morning runs that followed the same route. And, how he was going to grab her, take her to his car, and to where he was living. We felt that this was an escalation of what he does. Going from rape, to kidnaping, and who knows what else. And, it was just like what happened, until Mr. Overfield stepped in.

"All I can say is, that what Mr. Overfield did couldn't have turned out any better. Not only did he stop something that was not going to turn out good, but he provided us a way to get DNA evidence. And, that may have solved a number of other cases, as well as a very important one for us.

Looking at the detective from the sheriff's office, he continued with, "Jim. Would you fill them in on the rest."

Jim, the detective from the sheriff's office, then said, "Thanks Bill. Yes, Mr. Overfield. What you did, solved one of our toughest cases. Not to mention bringing a very bad felon to justice.

"Once we has his DNA, which was not on file anywhere, and shared it on the Federal data base, it provided hits in a number of unsolved rape cases. But, more important, it provided a link in the murder case of Miss Nora White-Owl."

I heard my aunt gasp, and start crying. My uncle and mom tried to comfort her.

The detective continued with, "I know this opens some old wounds, but please realize that we have a very good case against him. Since the rape and murder of Miss White-Owl happened on a reservation it's a Federal crime. And, that's why the FBI is here. After looking at our case they felt we have a very good case against Mr. Fleming. So, the county district attorney has been working with a federal prosecutor, going over our reports and the evidence with a fine tooth comb. They wanted to make sure that everything is in order, and it is.

"This afternoon the district attorney and the federal prosecutor are going to file charges against Mr. Fleming for felony murder with a death penalty clause in Federal court. This is because he caused Miss White-Owl's death during the act of committing a felony, her rape. When he's found guilty, and he will be, he will get a minimum of life with no chance of parole. And, of course he could be sentenced to death.

"He's currently being held without bond.

"The reason that we brought all of you in today, is that you are all interested parties in one way or another in both cases. And, we wanted you to know about the charges being filed before the news media got a hold of it. We feel it will be front page news.

"Now, the other case is Miss Tallchief 's abduction."

Caley was sitting next to me, and had been holding my hand through all of this, and when the detective said her name, she really squeezed my hand.

He continued with, "Miss Tallchief. We feel that if the felony murder case against Mr. Fleming goes as we think it will, that your case, unless you want it to, will never come to trial. You and Mr. Overfield may have to testify at his trial as to what happened to you in the park`. But, maybe not. We feel that we have enough evidence that we probably won't need your testimony.

"Both of these crimes happened on reservation land, and only the felony murder case would be held in Federal court. The other would be a tribal matter. Does anyone have any questions?"

Everyone shook their heads no. Then he looked at the sheriff, and asked, "Sheriff. Do you have anything that you'd like to say?"

The Sheriff stood, and said, "I know all of this has been hard on you. And, we appreciate all that you have done. And, all I wanted to do is say to all of you is thank you."

As we were getting ready to leave, everyone was standing around talking. I was standing with Caley, when the FBI agent, Mr. Scott Powell, came up to me, and he said, "Mr. Overfield can I have a minute."

"Sure.", I said. "But make it Luke or Little Wolf."

"Okay Luke. When I first heard your story from the two detectives, I was very skeptical. Dreams, Guardian Angels, and two-spirited people just didn't make sense to me. But, the more they told me about you and how you found Miss Tallchief, the more I thought it possible.

"I attended your Pow Wow on Saturday, my first, and found it very interesting. Especially that they accept you as a girl, and gave you the respect that they did. I also read the information in the program, and it made me curious. So, I did some on-line research. And, it opened my eyes to some of the Native American beliefs. And, gave me more respect for your people."

"Thank you." I said. "It's nice to see someone trying to understand us. My father isn't Native American, and he's still learning. It's not easy to understand something that is foreign to your background. I knew what a two-spirit person was, but is still somewhat strange to me. And, I'm still learning about it."

Just then there was a knock on the door. The tribal police chief walked over, opened the door, and was handed a note. As he read it, I saw a smile on his face, and when he was done reading the note, he said, "Jim. You may want to read this before everyone leaves."

The detective from the tribal police department walked over to his chief, took the note, read it, and then handed it to the sheriff's detective. The sheriff walked over, as did the FBI agent, and read the note. I was seeing a bunch of smiles. I was wondering what was going on.

The police chief said, "Ladies and gentlemen. Before you leave, we have something to tell you.

"We just received a note from the county district attorney. He and the federal prosecutor presented all the evidence against him to Mr. Fleming and his attorneys. And, then told them that they were going to file the felony murder charge with a death penalty clause against him today in the case of Miss White-Owl.

"After a discussion with his attorney, Mr. Fleming agreed to plead guilty, if the death penalty was taken off the table. The DA and prosecutor agreed. So, it looks like, if the judge agrees, that Mr. Fleming will be spending the rest of his life in a Federal maximum security prison with no chance of parole."

My dad asked, "Is there a chance that this judge won't go along with it?"

"No. I think this judge will go along with it. He's tough on people like Mr. Fleming."

"Good."

My aunt looked at my dad, and asked, "What does this mean?"

"Sheila.", my dad said. "Basically it means that it's all over. There won't be a trial. There will be a sentencing before the judge. And, then Mr. Fleming will be off to prison."

My aunt broke down in tears. My mother and my uncle held her. Caley and I hugged. Caley's parents came over to us, and we exchanged hugs. Then everyone thanked the police officers for all their hard work.

My family, Caley's family, and my aunt and uncle went to the casino for lunch. It was like a celebration lunch. But, no one talked about the case. Afterwards we all went back to my house. The adults went out on the deck, and Caley and I went further out into the yard to a secluded group of pines, where my dad had placed a bench. And we sat.

We sat quietly for a long time, then I asked her, "Are you happy how this all worked out?"

"Kind of.", she replied. "Actually I wish none of it would have happened."

"Me too."

"Do you really think the judge will go along with the plea thing?"

"The plea agreement. The cops, and my dad, seem to think he will. So, I don't see why not."

"Good."

She cuddled closer, and whispered, "At least now Nora can rest."

"Maybe rest as far as the murder is concerned. But, I feel she still has a lot to teach me."

We just continued sitting there for a few minutes. Then I said, "I feel like I need to do something."

Caley looked at me, and said, "You need to visit Nora. Don't you?"

I looked at her, smiled, nodded yes, and said, "Yes. How did you know?"

"I just did. And, you want me to go with you."

I looked at her a little puzzled.

And, then she said, "And, you want to go in dance outfits. Don't you?"

I said, "Wait a minute. How did you know all this?"

"I could just sense it. It's like your way to tell her what happened, and that you're happy with the way it turned out. But, I think she already knows."

"She probably does. But, I still want to share it with her."

She turned, looked at me, I looked at her, and we kissed. She got up, offered me her good hand, and led me back to where the adults were. My mother saw us, and asked, "Why so serious you two?"

I looked at my aunt, and said, "Forgive me Aunt Sheila. But, I need to visit Spirit Dancer's grave. And, I want Caley to go with me."

"Honey.", my Aunt Sheila said. "There's no need to apologize. Nora is your Guardian Angel, and you need to be close to her."

Then I said to my mom, "Mom. Could you or dad take us to the cemetery? But, we need to change first."

Caley's parents took her home. I went upstairs, and became Little Fawn. The panties. The bra and forms. Then I took my makeup case, went to my mom and dad's room, sat at the vanity, and added some light makeup. The foundation. The eyebrows. The mascara. Some light eyeshadow. A light touch of eyeliner. The lip liner pencil. And, the light pink lipstick.

Then, for some reason I added some blusher to highlight my high cheek bones.

I undid my pony tail, and brushed out my hair. No braids today. I wanted my hair straight. As I brushed out my hair, I looked at myself in the mirror, and I saw the girl again. Me. Little Fawn. But, the blusher made me look even more like a girl than before.

When I had my hair the way I wanted it. I found a pretty beaded headband in my mother's dresser, and placed it around my head. I then tied my choker around my neck. And, replaced one set of my studs with a very pretty pair of beaded earrings.

I went back to my room. Looked at the three dance dresses that I had, and I chose the one that Nora had asked me to wear when I was in her bedroom and her spirit first told me that I was a two-spirit person. Then I put on a pair of my fancy moccasins with leggins.

I went back to my mom and dad's room, looked at myself in the mirror, and just smiled. I went downstairs to be my parents, and my aunt and uncle, were sitting. My aunt was the first to see me, and she just shook her head, and said, "Little Fawn. Every time I see you, you look prettier then the time before."

Everyone turned and looked at me. My dad said, "I swear that Little Wolf has a girl hidden in his room, and he sends her down when he wants us to think he's a girl."

I looked at my dad, and said, "Daddy!"

"I sorry. It just surprises me that you can look so good as a girl, so quickly."

"Honey.", my mother said. "Would you mind if we all go to the cemetery with you?"

"No. But, Caley and I really want to be alone with Spirit Dancer for a while."

My aunt then said, "We could go visit your grandparent's grave. Then come back."

"That would be good."

"Why don't we go to the cemetery.", dad said. "Then come back here and have a cookout. And, we can invite Caley and her parents too."

With a smile, I said, "You'd better have them bring Kimi."

My mother laughed, and said, "Your other girl friend."

"Mom!"

"Honey. You and Caley were so cute with her at the Pow Wow."

My Dreams of Spirit Dancer
by Teddie S.

 
Little Fawn now has her own dance regalia. Her mother, aunt, and Laughing Maiden had gone behind her back and had a dress made for her. Also behind her back, they set up and held a Give Away Ceremony for Little Wolf at a Pow Wow. Something that she, or even he, really didn't want. Then, a meeting at the police department was very interesting. Everyone found out a lot about the man that attached Caley and murdered Spirit Dancer.

We all went to the cemetery. Caley had gone with her parents and Kimi, and when she got out of the car she looked more like a Native American princess then Caley. There was no way that I could call her Caley, today I just had to call her Laughing Maiden.

After she and I had gotten out of the cars, everyone else drove over to where my grandparents were buried. Laughing Maiden and I walked over to Spirit Dancer's grave, and just stood there. Laughing Maiden reached out and took my hand in hers, and just held it, and we just stood there for a few minutes. Both of us, without talking about it, had brought our dance fans. I started a slow, quiet, in place, dance, and Laughing Maiden joined me. We did sing, but it was very quiet.

When we stopped dancing, we sat on the ground and meditated. I was feeling Spirit Dancer's presence. I don't know if Laughing Maiden was or not. But, I was feeling that Spirit Dancer was happy and was at peace with what had happened today. I also felt that she'd still be around as my Guardian Angel. And, that made me feel good.

When Laughing Maiden and I got up, we looked around and saw the other seven standing by the cars. Kimi broke loose of her mother and came running over to us. When she got to us, she pointed to Spirit Dancer's grave, and asked, "Who's buried there?"

I stooped down, and said, "Spirit Dancer. She was my cousin."

"Oh. Is she the one that was hurt by that bad man?"

"Yes honey. She was."

"That's sad. But, now she's your Guardian Angel?"

"Yes she is."

"I'm really sorry she died."

"Thank you Kimi. She would have liked you."

Kimi then ran back to her mother, as my aunt and uncle walked toward us. The four of us hugged, and then Laughing Maiden and I left them to their thoughts.

When we got back to the group, I asked my dad, "Did we keep you waiting long?"

"No honey.", my dad said. "We gave you all the time you wanted."

"Thanks. It felt good to be with Spirit Dancer."

"Did you feel her spirit?", my mother asked.

"Yes.", Laughing Maiden said.

I looked at her in surprise, and asked, "You felt her spirit too?"

"Yes."

When my aunt and uncle came back to the car, I could see tears in my aunt's eyes, and I hugged her. She whispered in my ear, "Her spirit lives in you."

I didn't say anything, but moved back so I could look at her. And, I saw a little smile on her face. I hugged her again.

The nine of us then headed back to my house for the cookout. When we got there, there was a strange car in the driveway. My mom asked, "Whose car is that?"

"I'm not sure. But, I think it might be Steven's.", my dad said.

"Steven!", I said. "What's he doing home?"

"Maybe his internship is over."

"It'll be good to see him.", my mother said.

"Yeah. Right.", I said.

"What's wrong?"

"Does he know about Little Fawn?"

"I don't think so."

"How about Nora?"

"Yes. He was really sorry that he couldn't be here for the funeral."

"How do we tell him about Little Fawn?"

"Oh. . . . Well . . . I guess we just introduce him to you, and then explain."

"This is going to be interesting."

You see, my older brother Steven, who's Native American name means Charging Bear, hasn't been home since he started college three years ago. He's basically given up his Native American heritage.

"It'll be fine.", my mom said.

"We'll see. But, I'm going to need to take Laughing Maiden for a walk."

"Why?"

"I've never talked much about Steven. And, I want her to know before he sees me."

"Okay honey. We'll go in and talk to him. Then just come in when you're ready."

"Okay."

I got out of my parents car and walked over to Caley who'd just gotten out of her parent's car. And, I said, "We need to go for a walk."

"Why?", she asked.

"That's Steven's car, and before you meet him I need to tell you about him."

"Oh. Okay. Why?"

"I just do."

I took her hand, and as we walked towards the backyard, I saw my mom and dad talking to Laughing Maiden's parents. She and I walked back to the secluded group of pine trees, and we sat on the bench. I didn't say anything right away. Then she said, "So. Tell."

I took a deep breath, and said, "Steven, even though he was born here, has never liked living on the reservation. And, he always want to move to where there was more people. When he got accepted to the university that he did, he left and hasn't been back. He didn't even make it back for Nora's funeral. He's also basically renounced his Native American heritage.

"I figure that he won't understand, or even try to understand, me being two spirited. And, he really won't understand me having the dreams about Nora, and that she's my Guardian Angel. And, seeing me dressed as Little Fawn may really not be good."

She sat there quietly for a short time, then said, "Honey. Just believe in yourself, like I believe in you. Your parents, my parents, your aunt and uncle, and even the FBI guy, believes in you. You know how special you are. I know how special you are. And, they know how special you are.

"You helped me face my fears. Now, I'll help you face yours."

I looked at her, and said, "I love you."

She smiled, and gave me a little kiss.

Then I asked, "So. You felt Spirit Dancer's spirit at the cemetery?"

"Yeah. It was strange. But, I did feel her there. And, it was like she was happy that we were there together."

"That's interesting. No dreams about her?"

"No. You may be."

"Me?"

"Uh huh."

I knew she wasn't going to tell me anything about her dreams, so I didn't even ask.

We then got up, and walked hand in hand to the house.

As we got to the door, she gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, and said, "Everything will be fine."

I looked at her, took a deep breath, opened the door, and walked in. We first saw her mother who was keeping Kimi busy. And, she told us that everyone else was in the kitchen.

We headed to the kitchen, and stopped at the door. Everyone was sitting at the table, and Steven's back was to us. My mom and dad were sitting across from him, my aunt and uncle were sitting on either side of him, and Caley's father was sitting next to my dad.

My mom smiled at us, and said, "Hi kids. Come join us."

Steven turned and looked at us, and said, "You've got to be kidding me!"

As we walked into the kitchen, I said, "What's wrong Steven!?"

Just staring at me, Steven said, "I just heard an unbelievable story about you. And, everyone here has told me things about you and the things that happened. And, now you look more like a girl then I thought was possible. What's happened to you?"

"I've found out that I'm two spirited. And, what you're seeing is my feminine spirit. I guess that it's something that I've been all along, but didn't know it until I had a dream about Dream Dancer, or as you know her Nora. She's my Guardian Angel."

"I just can't believe this. There's no such things as Guardian Angels."

"Then can you explain to me, or to all of us, how I knew that Laughing Maiden was in trouble and where she was."

"It had to be dumb luck."

"Was it dumb luck, as you call it, that I woke out of a sound sleep and knew that she was in trouble, and ran to where she was? There's no way that it was dumb luck."

"So, do you still dress as a boy?"

"Yes. More than I dress as a girl. Now, stop trying to change the subject. And, if you're so damn smart, tell me how I knew."

"Boys.", my mom said. "Stop."

"Mom." I said. "I knew he wouldn't understand. All of you told him the story. And, he still doesn't believe that it happened."

Laughing Maiden had been holding my hand the whole time, and the longer this went on, the harder she squeezed. I looked over at her and she was crying.

Then we heard Laughing Maiden's mother say, "Kimi! You come back here. Right now."

Kimi than ran into the kitchen, with her mother right behind her. Kimi stood next to me, looked at Steven, and said, "Mister. Little Fawn saved my sister. And, my sister might not be here if she hadn't. That would make me really sad. Little Fawn is really nice. Stop talking bad to her."

"Wow!", Steven, in a condescending tone, said. "When a cute little girl like that, tells me I'm wrong. Maybe I am."

"No maybe about it.", my dad said. "And, there's no reason to talk to her that way!"

Steven looked at me, and said, "Luke. No. I guess it's Little Fawn. I'm sorry. I just never believed something like this could happen. Dreams, spirit guides, Guardian Angels, and two spirited people, just don't make sense to me."

Then he looked at Laughing Maiden, and said, "And, I'm sorry that I made your friend cry."

"Steven.", my mom said. "Meet Laughing Maiden. She's the girl that he rescued."

"Oh God no. Now I've really put my foot in it. I believe that he saved you. Everyone knows he did that. I just can't believe that he saw you being attacked in a dream. But, please forgive me?"

"I don't know if I can.", Laughing Maiden said. "You're talking down to everyone here. And, you've hurt someone I care a lot about. She's a wonderful person, and a great friend."

"Sorry."

"I'll think about forgiving you. But, I don't know."

Steven looked me, and asked, "So. You look at yourself as being a girl right now?

"In a way.", I replied. "My feminine spirit is the strongest right now. And, when that happens I feel better looking like a girl. And, when I do, I like to look the best I can."

"I'll be honest. When I first saw the two of you standing there, I saw two pretty girls. I couldn't believe that one of them was you, until you talked."

"Thank you. I know you don't understand everything that they told you about me. It was a lot. I'm still learning about the two-spirit thing myself. But, I believe in myself. I believe that I'm two spirited. I believe that I have a Guardian Angel. I believe that I'm meant to help my people."

"You have really matured since I last saw you."

"Maybe if you'd come around once in a while, you'd know what was happening. Your family misses you."

Then he looked at Laughing Maiden, and asked, "So, my little brother actually rescued you?"

"Yes.", she replied. "He risked his life to save mine."

"And, this was from the same guy that killed my cousin?"

"Yes. And, she's the one who's Little Fawn's Guardian Angel."

"You speak of him so easily as a boy or a girl. Why?"

"Because he is either. And, I see him that way. It's who he is. Who he is meant to be. And, if Nora hadn't told him that he was two spirited, he may have never known. And, that would have been a loss to our people. As was the loss of Nora.

"Nora found out from our forefathers that he was meant to be two spirited. And, came to him in a dream, and told him. It bothered him until he went to the Island of Dreams and found his spirit. Both of them.

"They make him special to his people. To the people who really know him.

"So what if he dresses as a girl at times. It's what's in his heart that's important, and he's pure of heart and mind. It's the people that don't understand that are the looser."

Everyone, including me, just looked at her. Finally my dad broke the silence with, "Ah. Who wants a steak?"

I took Laughing Maiden back to the living room and asked, "Where did all of that come from?"

She smiled at me, and replied, "It's how I feel about you. And, he needed to know."

"I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. Just continue to be who you are."

"You know. It scares me how well you know me."

With a cute little smile, she said, "It should." Then she gave me a quick kiss.

She had brought a change of clothes with her, and she and I ran upstairs to change. She changed in the bathroom, and I changed in my room. I took off my dress, moccasins, choker, and headband. And, put my hair into a girl's ponytail. I slipped on a pair of shorts, and one of my tops. I only have two pairs of girl's shoes, other than the moccasins, so I put on the sandals with a one inch heel. And, I redid my lipstick. God I was feeling like a girl right now.

Caley and I were done changing at the same time, both of us in shorts and a cute tops. And, we ran downstairs together. The women had started working on all of the food, other than the steaks, and the men were doing that. My mom put us to work getting the vegetables ready, then she quietly asked, "You two didn't change together. Did you?"

"Mother! No!", I said.

As my mom walked away, she said, "Sorry."

I looked at Caley, and she was grinning. I asked her, "And, just what are you grinning about?"

With that cute smile, she said, "Oh nothing."

"Oh something."

Caley and I put together a couple nice trays of raw vegetables, and we carried them out to the table on the patio. All the men, except Caley's dad, were standing around the grill watching my dad cook the steaks. Caley's dad was keeping Kimi occupied playing soccer with her.

My dad saw us with the trays of vegetables, and said, "Thanks girls. Those look good."

As Caley and I walked away, I heard my brother say, "Dad. How can you accept Luke as a girl?"

"Because she is a girl. At least one of her spirits is.", my dad replied.

I stopped where I could hear them, but not be seen. Caley was standing behind me. Then, I heard my brother say, "You may believe all of this, but I'm still finding it hard to accept this spirit thing. And, how can he have two?"

"I've learned that there are such things as people having spirits, and that we all do. And, that there are two-spirit people, and spirit guides, and Guardian Angels. That some people have dreams that have a lot of meaning to them. Like the ones he's had. A lot of this I didn't believe until recently. And, it did take me a while to accept it. But, I have. When he's Little Wolf he's all boy. And, when he's Little Fawn she's all girl.

"When she dances, I see a girl dancing. And, her dancing is fantastic. She tells us that Spirit Dancer is helping her. Maybe Spirit Dancer is guiding her in her dancing as well as being her Guardian Angel.

"You should have been here for the last Pow Wow. We had a Give Away Ceremony for her, and she was so embarrassed that I think if she could have run away she would have. He, or she, doesn't want any recognition for what he does for anyone. But, the way everyone accepted her was wonderful."

"Dad. I'm still not sure if I can accept this. It's just not right. It's against everything that I think is right."

"How long are you going to be here?"

"A few days."

"Spend time with him. No matter which spirit he is. See the two sides of him like I have. Do some of the things like you use to with him. Then make up your mind."

"Maybe. We'll see."

Well. To make a very long story short. This was the longest three days of my life. I hung around the house, and Steven and I did do a few things together, but there was a tension between us every time we were together. And, by the third day, we were avoiding each other. Also, over those three days, I talked with Caley on the phone, but hadn't seen her. Which didn't help.

On the third day, I finally had to get out of the house. So, I called Caley and asked her to meet me at the park. There was a little hesitation in her voice when she said, yes. And, I asked her if she was all right? She answered me by asking me to stop by her house and pick her up.

I walked to her house, and as we were walking to the park I asked her, "What's wrong?"

"I'm still just a little nervous about going to the park by myself."

I took her hand in mine, and said, "I can understand that. You went through a lot."

Instead of sitting at our usual picnic table, we sat on a bench, and she cuddle up next to me. And, we just sat there looking at the lake and the ducks. Finally I said, "This thing with Steven isn't going well."

"Why?", she asked.

"I feel a lot of tension between us. And, I'm afraid to bring up my feminine spirit. In fact, I think she's afraid to show herself. I haven't felt her presence, or dreamed about Nora, since he's been home."

"Do you think that he's going to accept you as you are?"

"No. And, in a way I don't care if he does or not. I'm who I am. And, I like who I am. I'm not going to change for him or really anyone."

"I understand. But, I hate to see this happen to your family."

"I know. I really do to. I've accepted him for what he believes."

"Honey. Just remember, that not everyone is going to understand this. You might not fit into what they feel is normal."

"I know. But, it really hurts to not have a member of your own family accept you."

As she cuddled closer, she whispered, "I'm sorry."

We sat there quietly for a long time. Then I looked at her, and said, "There's nothing for you to be sorry for. I'll just have to accept his decision. Whatever that may be. And, move on."

"I know.", she said. "If he can't accept you. It'll be hard on you. But, you are a very strong person, and will work through it. And, you have people that will help you through it."

"You know. I've been told, even by my brother, that I've matured a lot since this two-spirit thing started. But, I think you've matured more. You see things in me that I don't. Some of the things that you said to my brother the other day, I think, stunned him. I know that they surprised me, and maybe everyone else."

"I said what I was feeling. I felt that he was attacking someone that I love, and I reacted to protect that person."

I took her in my arms and kissed her.

A little later we were walking up to my house, and I noticed that Steven's car was gone. I figured that he was out running around. We walked into the hose and found my mother sitting in the kitchen. She looked at us, and said, "Hi kids."

I looked at my mom, she looked sad, and like she'd been crying. So, I asked, "Mom. Are you all right?"

She sighed, a deep sign, and said, "Not really."

"What's wrong?"

Caley and I sat at the table, as she said, "Your brother."

"What happened?"

"He just left. And, said that he won't be back."

"What!"

"He and your dad got into it this morning. And, it wasn't good."

"About what?"

She just looked at me, and I asked, "Don't tell me it was about me?"

She just nodded yes.

"No. Oh God no."

I felt Caley's hand touch mine, and squeeze it. And, then she asked my mom, "Mrs. Overfield. What happened?"

"Well.", my mother said. "Steven's father started talking to him about Luke. He was wondering if he'd had a chance to do things with you, and see what Luke was all about. Steven went off the deep end. I won't tell you everything that Steven said, but he basically said that there was no way that he could accept what was going on. That is was wrong, and just immoral.

"Then they got into a shouting match. And, your father threw him out of the house. And when he left, as he threw his house key at your dad, and he said that he'd never be back."

I sat there, and started to cry. Then I got up, and ran out of the house. I heard my mom say to Caley, "Honey. Go after him."

I ran to the group of pine trees, where the bench was, sat on the bench, and put my face in my hands. I've never cried this hard before. A few seconds later I sensed Caley sit next to me. I felt her arm go around my back, and her pull me close. I buried my face in her shoulder, cried, and she just held me.

I know I cried for a long time, and Caley tried to calm me down. I don't know how long it had been, but I finally heard my dad's voice say, "Luke. Son. It's not your fault. Your brother just isn't opened minded."

I looked up, and my mother and father were standing there. Then he said, "You're who you are. It's in your mind and soul. And, if he can't accept it, that's his loss. He's never accepted anything of his Native American heritage, and he doesn't know what he's missing. It took me a while to accept everything that has gone on, but I have. I realize I have a son that is also a daughter. A son that has a Guardian Angel. A son that I feel will do good things for his people. A son that enjoys and embraces his two spirits.

"And, don't worry about Steven. He's very self-sufficient and can take care of himself. And, hopefully one day he'll see the errors of his decision. But, please don't blame yourself for it. Please."

"Dad.", I said. "I love you and mom. You're the greatest." Then I looked at Caley, and said, "And, I love you too. But, I feel like it's my fault and that I've driven Steven away. I love him too, and it hurts.

"But, dad. I think I see what you're saying. He's never enjoyed living here. But, why does he hate me?"

"Honey.", my mother said. "He doesn't hate you. He just doesn't understand you, and the whole Native American thing. Some people who don't understand something react in a very negative way to it. Just give it time."

I sat back, took a deep breath, and said, "I guess. But, it still hurts."

My mom and dad left me alone with Caley. And, we just sat there. I finally looked at Caley, and said, "If I didn't have you. I don't know what I'd do. You understand me. Why I don't know. But, you do."

She finally smiled, and said, "It's a secret. And, I'll never tell."

It was funny, but soon after Steven left I felt Spirit Dancer was back with me.

All of the two-spirit stuff had started towards the end of my sophomore year in high school, and continued through the summer. It wasn't long after Steven had left that Caley and I started our junior year. And, I did continue to dress as Little Fawn, but never at school. And, I continued meeting with White Antelope.

Caley, I, and all of the other kids on the reservation went to a school that was on the reservation. And, there were also a few kids that came from the nearby farms and ranches. The tribal school was really great, thanks to the casino. The school was like a campus. All the buildings for the various grades, elementary, middle school, junior high school, and high school, were separate, but close to each other. All of our classes are small. And, the Tribal Council, had set up a really good School Board, and they are able to pay our teachers very well, so we have some really great teachers. They also offer a lot of college preparatory classes. And, a lot of our teachers are Native American, and a lot of those are from our own tribe. They even offered classes on Native American heritage.

Back during my freshman year, everyone took aptitude tests and I scored high in math and science. So, I've been taking some really tough math and science classes and doing well in them. This year, right after the start of school, they had us take some other aptitude tests. Again I did really well in math and science. And, soon after we found out what our results were, I got called into the junior class's guidance counselor's office. She was new to the school this year, and not a Native American.

As I walked into her office I said, "Miss Thorn. Did you want to see me?"

"Hello Mr. Overfield.", Miss Thorn said. "Yes. Please have a seat."

I sat, and she said, "Your aptitude test scores were really good."

"Thank you.", I replied.

"Really high in math and science. Have you thought about what you would like to do after graduation?"

"Well. I am planning on going to college."

"Any idea what you'd like to study?"

"I was thinking of maybe medicine."

"I was hoping you'd say that. Your scores also indicated a strong leaning that way."

I just smiled. Then she said, "And, some of your other scores were very interesting."

I just looked at her a little puzzled. And, she continued with, "There are some areas of the tests, where girls usually score low and boys score high. And, some areas where girls usually score high and boys score low. And, that's expected. But, you ended up in the middle in a lot of them, and in a few you were well into the ranges where a girl would normally score.

"We do see this in these tests from time to time, but not very often. And, we like to try and figure out why. Would you be willing to talk with me about it?"

I smiled, and said, "Sure. But, I can probably tell you why."

"Oh. And, why is that?"

"I'm two spirited."

"Two spirited?"

"Yes ma'am. Do you know what that is?"

"I do remember reading something about that when I was thinking about taking this job. I wanted to know as much as possible about Native Americans as I could. There was a short article about their belief in spirits, and that sometimes a special person would have two spirts. And, those two spirts are usually male and female. Am I close?"

"Yes ma'am. Really close. And, in some two-spirit people, one of the spirits can be stronger than the other. And, my feminine spirt is stronger than my male one."

"So, you feel that you really have two spirits?"

"Yes ma'am. I know I do."

"And, just how do you know?"

I preceded to tell her about the past summer. She just sat there and took it all in.

When I was done, she said, "You had a really busy summer. I do know what happened to Miss Tallchief. And, that another student rescued her. And, that was you?"

"Yes ma'am."

"And, you had a dream that she was in trouble."

"Yes ma'am."

"And, your Guardian Angel is Miss White-Owl. Who was killed by the same person that attacked Miss Tallchief?"

"Yes ma'am. Spirt Dancer, as we call her, is not only my Guardian Angel, but she was my cousin. And, she was the one that appeared in my dream when Caley was attacked. In fact I dream about her a lot."

She sat there and looked at me for a while, then said, "Mr. Overfield. I tend to believe what you just told me. I know that Native Americans believe in things like this. And, there must be something to it."

"There is. It's true and it happens. If you really want to know more. You might want to talk to White Antelope."

"White Antelope. He's the tribe's medicine man. Isn't he?"

"Yes ma'am. He is. And, he's also my teacher."

"You're teacher?"

"He's been teaching me about two-spirited people."

"Is he a good teacher?"

"Yes ma'am. A very good teacher."

"Maybe I'll just have to meet with him. Maybe he will be able to teach me things about working with you and the other Native American boys and girls here."

"He'd probably be happy to."

"Could you ask him for me? And, if he will, have him give me a call."

"I'm seeing him after school today. So, I'll ask him."

"Thank you. So, you've actually danced as a girl at the Pow Wow."

"Yes ma'am. Actually more than once. With my Guardian Angel being Spirit Dancer, it comes naturally to me. When she was alive she was a fantastic dancer, and she loves to help me dance. And, I really enjoy dancing as a girl."

"You do?"

"Yes ma'am. And, I actually enjoy dressing as a girl and I do it a lot."

"Who knows that you do this?"

"Almost everyone."

"Really?"

"Sure. Being two spirited, and the stronger one being female. When she is guiding me, I feel like being a girl. So, I dress as a girl. And, since I've danced as a girl at the Pow Wows, everyone who was there saw me. And, the people accept me that way.

"I don't try to hide it. My friends are use to seeing me either way, and accept me either way. And, I look good enough when I'm a girl that I could pass you in the street and you wouldn't know it was me."

"That's very interesting Mr. Overfield. Thank you. I think you've opened my eyes to a number of things."

When I met up with Caley later that day, I told her all about my meeting with Miss Thorn. And, she was very interested in what we'd talked about. She grinned, and said, "Outsiders have problems understanding two-spirit people. Don't they?"

"Yes. I think they do.", I replied. "But, I have a feeling that she's trying to understand everything that I told her. It was like she really wanted to know about me. And, she seemed truly interested in talking to White Antelope."

I spoke with White Antelope about what Miss Thorn and I had talked about. And, he seemed pleased that she was interested in talking with him, and said that he would call her.

Later I found out that Miss Thorn and White Antelope did start meeting on a regular basis. And, that I was correct when I thought that she was truly interested in meeting with him. One day at school, I ran into Miss Thorn in the hallway, and she said, "Mr. Overfield. I want to thank you for putting me in contact with White Antelope. He really has taught me a lot about Native Americans, and their beliefs.

"And, he's really opened my eyes as to how important and special two-spirit people are to their people."

I smiled, and said, "I'm glad that you two are getting together. I knew he would be able to answer all your questions."

"He's invited me to come to a Fire Ceremony at the next full moon. And, he said that I should bring two sticks to burn. One would represent something that I'd like to rid from my past. And, the other would represent a request for something new."

"You should come. The Full Moon Fire Ceremony provides a way to release the energy from something in the past that you'd like to get rid of, and a prayer request for something new."

"You seem to know your Native American lore."

"White Antelope is a good teacher."

Two days later I was with White Antelope, and he said, "I've invited Miss Thorn to a Full Moon Fire Ceremony."

"She told me a couple of day's ago.", I replied.

"I thought she would. She's learned a lot about us. And, wants to learn more. Plus, she's very interested in you and you being a two-spirit person. But, I haven't told her much about you, just what a two-spirit person is. And, I think maybe it's time for her to meet Little Fawn."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. And, the Fire Ceremony would be an ideal place to do it. And, I'd like Laughing Maiden there too. We're having the ceremony out behind my house at the teepee. There will be others there. And, I'd like you and Laughing Maiden to dance for us."

"She might like that. She hasn't really wanted to dance much since that day she was attacked."

"That's not good. Do you think she will?"

"I'll ask her. And if she doesn't, I'll talk her into it."

"I hope you can. Because, I want you to make an entrance. I'd like you two to be in the teepee, and come out when I call you."

"How about this. We hide in the teepee, and when the drumming and singing starts, we come out and dance. Then you can introduce us to her?"

"Yes. I like that."

Later that day Caley and I were walking back to her house from the park. And, I said, "White Antelope told me that he's invited Miss Thorn to a Fire Ceremony."

"She really is trying to learn about our people. Isn't she?", Caley said.

"Yes she is. Would you like to go?"

"Sure. I haven't been to one for a long time."

"Since he's talked with her about two-spirit people, he thinks it's time she meets Little Fawn."

"So, Little Fawn would be there?"

"Yeah. Would you like to dance?"

"Huh?"

"White Antelope wants us to dance at the ceremony."

"Us? Like me and Little Fawn."

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Ah. Maybe."

"What's wrong? You haven't wanted to dance since that day. Why?"

"I don't know."

"Honey. This isn't good. You love to dance. You need to dance. Dance with Little Fawn, and I'll bet you'll feel better."

"You think?"

"Yes."

"You really want me to dance with you?"

"Honey. When haven't I wanted to dance with you?"

"I guess never."

"We dance together like we're one. And, I love doing it with you."

She wrapped her arms around me, and kissed me. After we broke the kiss, she said, "Thank you. I needed you to ask me. To show me that you still cared about our dancing together. It'll be just so good to dance again."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know."

"Please. Don't hold things back from me. Talk to me."

"I will. I promise."

I smiled at her, and said, "It'll be wonderful to dance with you again. But, you can't tell anyone."

"Why?"

"Miss Thorn hasn't met Little Fawn. And, we're going to surprise her."

"How?"

"Well. We're going to hide in White Antelope's teepee, and when the drumming and singing starts we'll make an entrance and dance. Then he'll introduce us to her."

"How do you think she'll take it?"

"I think she'll be surprised. And, it should be fun."

My Dreams of Spirit Dancer
by Teddie S.

 
Luke's brother, Steven, came home and found out about his brother being two spirited. He also met Little Fawn and Laughing Maiden, and it wasn't a good thing. Steven left the house after an argument with his dad, and vowed to never come back. Then we found out about Luke's school and how his counselor found out about him being a two-spirit person. And, how she started talking with White Antelope and learning about the Native American people.

It was Saturday, and Caley and I were dancing at the Fire Ceremony. And, as a surprise for Mrs. Lynch, she would be meeting Little Fawn. The full moon would rise at about eight that evening. And, we planned for Caley and me to be there at about eight to hide in the teepee, before others would start arriving at about eight-thirty for the ceremony that would start at about nine.

I decided to wear the dress that mom had gotten me. So, after Caley and I had gone to a movie at one of the casino's movie theaters that afternoon and had a quick dinner. I dropped her off at her house. Yes, I now have my driver's license.

I went home and started getting ready for the ceremony. I undressed, and slipped on a pair of panties. Then I took my makeup case over to my mom and dad's room, sat at my mother's vanity, and braided my hair. Then came my favorite thing to do, my makeup. I just love watching my masculine face slowly transform into a pretty girl's face. So, a thin coat of foundation, a light touch of eyebrow pencil, some mascara, a light touch of eyeshadow, the lip liner pencil in pink, then the lipstick, and finally a little blusher. And, I was seeing Little Fawn again, but not quit feeling her. Yet.

Then it was back to my room. I put on a bra, and slipped the form into place. Then the dance outfit. Which one? I had three to choose from. I looked at them, and picked the dress that my mother had gotten me, and hadn't worn since that Pow Wow where they'd given me the Give Away Ceremony. But, it felt really good to have the buckskin dress on again.

My mother walked into my room, and said, “Hi Honey. I just came up to see if you needed any help. And, it looks like you don’t.”

“Thanks mom.”, I said. "It really feels good to be wearing a dance outfit again."

"Honey. You should really dance more.", she said.

"I know. But, Caley hasn't wanted to since that day. So, I haven't really felt like it either."

"Why hasn't she wanted to?"

"I just think that she was depressed over that whole incident. She never told me until the other day. I just hope she doesn't hold back anything else like that from me."

"How did you talk her into doing it?"

"I just told her that White Antelope had asked us to dance. And, that I really wanted to dance with her. Then she wanted to do it."

"Maybe that's what she needed. Someone to ask her to dance for them. Or, in your case, to dance with her."

"Yeah. I think she really did."

Mom sat with me as I finished dressing. I put on the moccasins with the leggins. I replaced my four studs with fancy earrings. I used the ones that Mrs. Redcloud had given me, for one set. And, for the other set, I used a pair that Caley had given me. They were multiple strands of beads about four inches long.

I put the pretty red and white bone choker that my aunt had given me around my neck and tied it in place. I moved the Eagle Feathers from the last headband that I'd worn to the one that I'd worn the first time that I'd danced. I looked in the mirror, and there was Little Fawn. Now I really felt like I was her. And, I smiled to myself.

And, it felt like someone else was smiling with me. Maybe Spirit Dancer?

Mom walked downstairs with me, and my dad was sitting there. He looked at me, and said, "Honey. You look really nice tonight."

"Thanks dad.", I replied.

"You mother tells me that you and Laughing Maiden are going to dance at the Fire Ceremony."

"Yeah. It's a special one for Miss Thorn. And, she's going to meet Little Fawn tonight too."

"Miss Thorn? Isn't she the guidance counselor from the high school?"

"Yes. She's taken a real interest in Native American culture, and has been meeting with White Antelope. And, wants to learn more about two-spirt people."

"That's good. The more that she knows about the culture. The better she'll be able to work with the students."

As I was walking out, my mother said, "Honey. Have fun. And, don't be too late."

"I will mom. Laughing Maiden has to be home by midnight, so I should be home right after that."

I picked Caley, or really Laughing Maiden, up, and seeing her in her dance outfit again made me smile. She looks so pretty. And, I told her so.

We drove over to White Antelope's house, and got ready for the ceremony. I put on my headdress, and helped Laughing Maiden with hers. He had a lot of firewood stacked for the fire, and had a fire laid, ready to start. Just before the others started to arrive, he lit the fire, and Laughing Maiden and I hid in the teepee. We closed the flap, so no one could see in. And, luckily there was a bench seat inside, so we were able to sit and wait.

We heard people start to arrive, and talk among themselves. Then just before nine, we heard White Antelope ask everyone to sit. He introduced Miss Thorn to everyone, and then gave the opening prayer. And, that was our cue to get ready. I took Laughing Maidens hand in mine, and whispered, "I love you."

She smiled at me, and said, "I love you too."

I carefully unfastened what was holding the flap closed. And, then picked up my dance shawl and fan, as did Laughing Maiden, and we waited.

White Antelope then asked everyone to meditate, and it was silent for a few minutes.

Then the drumming and singing started, and Laughing Maiden and I exited the teepee and started dancing. She danced one way around the fire, and I went the other. I noticed that White Antelope and Miss Thorn were sitting facing the teepee, and could see us as we started dancing. And, I could see that Miss Thorn was smiling.

We danced for a few minutes, then White Antelope held up his hand, the drumming and singing stopped, so we stopped dancing. Then White Antelope said, "Will the dancers and drummers please join us around the fire."

When I'd stopped dancing, I was standing by Miss Thorn. So, I sat next to her. She looked at me, and smiled.

White Antelope then said, probably more for Miss Thorn then the rest of us, "Each of you brought two small sticks to offer to the fire. The first stick will represent something that you would like to be free of from your life. The second stick is a prayer request for something that you want to bring into your life. Both sticks will burn, turn to smoke, and release their energy. This will allow the past energy and the new prayer request to move along to its highest spiritual path.

"Will everyone now toss their sticks into the fire."

Everyone tossed their two sticks into the fire. Then White Antelope started a chant. That was a prayer to the spirits. Everyone that knew the chant joined in. When the chant ended, White Antelope said another prayer.

Then the drummers started, and he invited everyone to join in the circle dance. As I stood up, I offered my hand to Miss Thorn. She looked at me, and said, "I don't know how."

I smiled at her and said, "Join me, and I'll teach you."

She took my hand, and stood up. She watched my first few steps, and attempted them. Then she copied my next few steps. And, she slowly got the hang of it.

We danced one circle of the fire, and stopped. When we stopped, Miss Thorn said, "Thank you miss. You dance very well."

"Your welcome, Miss Thorn. You learn quickly.", I replied.

"You know me?"

"Yes. Do you remember when I told you that you could walk past me on the street and not recognize me?"

She looked at me. Shook her head no. Then her eyes got big, she smiled, and said, "Oh my God! Mr. Overfield."

I smiled back, and said, "No. It's Little Fawn."

"Oh yes. Little Fawn. I can't believe this. You're so pretty, and dance really well. And, you're right, I wouldn't have known who you were. Your outfit is just gorgeous."

White Antelope then gave a closing prayer, and then walked over to us. Laughing Maiden joined us. And, I said, "Miss Thorn. I think you know my friend, this is Laughing Maiden, but I think you know her as Caley Tallchief."

"Yes. Miss Tallchief. You are also a wonderful dancer. Seeing the two of you dance. It was like watching a mirror image. You two were perfect together."

"Thank you.", Laughing Maiden said.

White Antelope broke in with, "We thought that it was time that you met Little Fawn. And, decided to surprise you."

"A very nice surprise.", Miss Thorn said.

Just then the three drummers, being drummers, started drumming. And, Laughing Maiden and I looked at each other, smiled, and started dancing. And, I heard White Antelope say to Miss Thorn, "Sit and enjoy. You're in for a real treat."

Laughing Maiden and I started dancing the Buckskin dance. And, everyone there sat and watched. A few even started singing. After we finished our dance, we got a few others to join us in another dance, and I even pulled Miss Thorn back out. And, this ceremony turned into a fun time.

As we were finally breaking up, Laughing Maiden and I were talking with White Antelope, and Miss Thorn walked over. She said, "I want to thank you three for a fun night. I haven't had this much fun for a long time. Plus finally meeting Little Fawn and Laughing Maiden, and seeing them dance was amazing. And, you even tried to teach me to dance."

"Miss Thorn.", I said. "It was fun having you here and your dancing wasn't bad. And, I'm glad you liked your surprise. You should come to our next Pow Wow, and you'll see a lot of really good dancers and different dances."

"I think I'll do that. And, I really do want to sit down with you and learn more about you.

"You just look so much like a girl. You act like a girl, dance like a girl, and it appears that everyone accepts you as a girl. I think I'm seeing what two-spirit people are to their people.

"I'd be more than happy to sit down with you. Just let me know when."

"Miss Thorn.", Laughing Maiden said. "Little Fawn is very special. And, so is Little Wolf. They complement each other perfectly. And, it's fun being with either of them, because they’re the same person in their heart. And, when I'm dancing with Little Fawn, I feel so alive. It's like I'm with the perfect partner."

"Laughing Maiden.", Miss Thorn asked. "Would you sit down with me too? I'd like to hear what a friend of a two-spirit person thinks about all of this."

"I would, but I may be too close to her to be really a good source of unbiased information."

"Too close? . . . Oh! You two are a couple.”, and with a smile she said. "Now I understand, too close."

"Yes. Maybe some of our friends would be better."

"Yes. You're probably right. But, you speak of her so easily just like she's a real girl. And, you know that there is a boy under there. How do you do it?"

"Miss Thorn. Are you sure that there is a boy under there? I know physically that there is. But, right now there is a spirit of a girl here. I can feel that spirit and that’s who she is. So, it's very easy to talk like there is a girl here."

"Miss Thorn.", White Antelope said. "Now you see how some of our people feel about two-spirit people. They can feel that spirit, and they know that they're special. I think if you asked anyone that was here tonight, that they would tell you that they knew that Little Fawn was really a boy, but that they knew that the boy spirit wasn't here, but his girl spirit was. And, they will treat him as a girl.

"And, Little Fawn is lucky to have a Guardian Angel like Spirit Dancer. She helps her in many things."

Miss Thorn said, "You three have really helped me see this part of Native American heritage, and I really appreciate it. Also, I know I have a lot more to learn, and this will help me do it. And, Little Fawn, I would really like to talk to some of your friends."

As I was taking Laughing Maiden home, I was deep in thought, and not saying anything. I kept seeing her glancing over at me. As I pulled into her driveway, she asked, "Honey. What's wrong?"

I parked, shut off the pickup, turned, looked at her, and said, "Do you remember when I told you about the dream where Spirit Dancer had told me that a girl had come into my life, and that she would become very important to me. And, to treat her like a princess?'

"Uh huh."

"You and I both know that the girl is you. Don't we?"

"Yeah."

"But right now I'm kicking myself for not realizing that she had a problem. That she was depressed. I should have known."

I saw tears in her eyes.

"Baby. Don't cry.", I said. "I'm just mad at myself for not seeing that and helping you before now. White Antelope has told me that two spirited people can sense things about people. When they're in trouble, when they need help, when they're depressed, or troubled by something.

"And, I didn't see it in the most important person in the world to me."

The tears really started. I'm glad I'd taken the pick-up truck tonight. It has a bench seat, and I could hold her. And I did.

Then I thought, 'Wait a minute. White Antelope asked us to dance together tonight. Did he know? Did he want me to see it on my own? Am I too close to Laughing Maiden to see her depression?'

I whispered to her, "Baby. Don't cry. I'm just mad at myself for not seeing this."

She whispered back, "Honey. I'm just so happy that you're holding me. And, knowing that you love me as much as I love you."

Then we were both startled by a tapping on the window. We looked and there was Laughing Maiden's mother, looking at us, and she didn't look happy. I opened the door, and she said, "All right you two in the house. Now!"

Laughing Maiden and I looked at each other. And, she whispered, "Oh God. We're in trouble now."

We got out of the truck, followed her mother into the house, and to the kitchen. Her dad was sitting there. And, neither of her parents looked happy. Her mother said, "Do you two realize what time it is?"

Both Laughing Maiden and I looked at the clock, and it was almost one in the morning. I said, "Mr. and Mrs. Tallchief. I'm really so sorry. I know it's way past her curfew. But, we were at the ceremony until just a little while ago. We must of lost track of time."

"That's no excuse.", her mother said, "She is supposed to be home by midnight."

"Yes ma'am. I know. And, I'm very sorry. But, Miss Thorn from school was there. And, we were teaching her to dance. And, the time got away from us."

"What about what I saw in the pickup?"

"Mom.", Laughing Maiden said, "I've been depressed since I was attacked. And, Luke just found out tonight that I was. I guess I was hiding it really well. And, we were having a serious talk about it. I started crying, and he was comforting me. I'm sorry. We should have come in as soon as we were back."

"Honey. You were depressed?"

"Yes mom. I was. But, dancing with Little Fawn tonight brought me out of it. It was like I was alive again. I wanted to dance, and have fun. And, I didn't want it to stop."

"Why didn't you talk to someone? Are you really all right?"

"Now I am. I really am."

Mrs. Tallchief looked at me, and said, "Luke. . . . Darn! It's so hard calling you Luke when you look like you do right now. But, Luke, I was ready to ground her, and forbid you two from seeing each other. But, I think that would be the worse thing that I could do to either of you.

"Now. You'd better get home before your parents come looking for you."

I quickly said goodnight to Caley's parents. And, Caley walked me to the door, we shared a very nice good night kiss. Then I asked her, "What did your first stick represent?"

"Being attacked by that guy.", she answered with smile.

I smiled, and said, "That's what mine represented too."

"Really?"

"Yes. What did your second one represent?"

"I'm not telling."

"Oh. Come on."

"Okay. I will if you will."

"No. I'm not telling either."

"I didn't think you would. Now get out of here before you get in any more trouble."

"I love you. See you tomorrow."

"Love you too."

Just as she was closing the door, I heard their phone ring.

I drove home, and there were lights on in the house. And, I figured that since it was after one in the morning, that I was in big trouble. As I walked into the kitchen, my parents were sitting there. And, I said, "Mom. Dad. I can explain. We . . . "

My mother stopped me with, "Honey. There's no need to explain. We just got off the phone with Caley and her mom, and we got the full story. And, we're just happy that she's okay."

I just looked at them, and asked, "So, you're not mad?"

"No. Just a little concerned about the two of you."

"I know mom. If they'd fix our cell phone coverage. We could have called. White Antelope's place is in a real dead zone."

My dad smiled, and said, "They'll be here next week to do a survey."

"How did you do that?"

"The Tribal Council told the cell phone company that they had to do something about the coverage on the reservation, or they were going to go with another company that would."

"I guess the only drawback are those ugly towers."

My dad grinned, and said, "We asked them about that too, and they said that they could possibly disguise them as pine trees."

"That would be great."

"But, no more of this late night stuff. I'm getting too old for it."

"Sorry daddy. It won't happen again."

I really don't like putting Little Fawn away. It feels like I'm removing part of me. I guess I really am. But, I'm only putting away what makes me look like her. She's always part of me, and I can always feel her.

The next day, I took Caley to lunch and a movie. At lunch we talked a little bit about us telling each other everything. Then, later as we were leaving the movie, we saw White Antelope and some other tribal elders. White Antelope saw us, excused himself, and walked over to us.

As he walked up, he said, "You two really put on a fantastic dance for everyone last night."

"Thank you.", Caley said. "I really needed to do that. It felt so good to dance with Little Fawn again."

He smiled, and said, "Come. Let's sit and talk."

We walked with him to one of the restaurants, found a quiet corner, and got something to drink. He looked at us, and said, "Little Wolf. You didn't know that she was depressed. Did you?"

"No I didn't.", I replied. "And, that's really bothered me."

"Don't let it. I saw it, and wouldn't have let it get any worse. You are very close to Laughing Maiden, and it's very hard to see things in people that you are this close to. But, it's part of your learning about two-spirit people.

"And, it was one of the reasons that I asked the two of you to dance at the Fire Ceremony. It helped you see her depression and it was a way to help her. With a person as close to you as she has become, you really have to concentrate to feel things."

"But when she was attacked.", I said. "I felt her pain, both physical and emotional. Why not this."

"You two have become much closer than you were then. And, being as close as you are now makes it hard to see the other person. But, you can. You just need to learn how. And, you can learn that. You need to go someplace and be completely alone with each other. Someplace where no one will bother you. Where you can sit a vigil together and your spirits can communicate."

"The Island of Dreams?", I asked.

"No. That is for finding your spirit. And, both of you have your spirits."

Caley looked at him a little puzzled, and asked, "I have my spirit?"

"Yes. Think back to when you were attacked, and Little Wolf saved you. What did you see while you were laying on the ground?"

Caley thought for a minute, then smiled, and said, "The only thing that I can remember seeing while I was laying on the ground was an otter in the river."

White Antelope smiled at her, and said, "Do you know what it means to have an otter as your spirit?"

"My spirit is an otter?"

With a bigger smile, he said, "Yes. And, whoever named you, Laughing Maiden, knew your spirit. An otter is the keeper of laughter. But, Little Wolf had better watch out, because the otter also represents feminine power. But, she is also playful, trusting, and inquisitive."

Caley had a little smile on her face. And, we sat there for a minute, then she asked, "Little Wolf's spirits. What do they mean?"

White Antelope said, "Being two spirited, he obviously has two spirits. The fawn or deer, and the wolf. And, just because it's Little Fawn and Little Wolf doesn't mean that the spirit's power is little. It's just the opposite. It's very strong.

"The deer has spiritual healing powers, and displays compassion, gentleness, and kindness. The wolf leads the way, he is the pathfinder. He's also intelligent and shows leadership. So, both are leaders.

"The most important thing with Little Wolf, is his Guardian Angel. She will guide and protect him."

"When will I ever learn all of this?", I asked.

"Little Wolf. Never. I am older, much older, than you, and I'm still learning. I'm actually learning things from you as I teach you. But, you will eventually be wise beyond your years."

"One thing I have learned, is that when it's time for us to sit our vigil together we will know. And, we will probably also know where we are to go."

White Antelope smiled, and said, "Yes. You will know."

Caley and I were having dinner with our parents at her house one night. And, Kimi was at her grandmother's for a sleep over.

As we were eating we talked about a number of things, and one was Caley and I meeting White Antelope and what we'd talked about. When Caley told everyone, that she'd found that the otter was her spirt. My mom looked at her, smiled, and said, "You're in good company."

"Why?", Caley asked.

"The otter is my spirit too."

Caley looked at me, and said, "You'd better be careful. You have two women in your life with otter spirits."

"Why?" I asked.

"Just remember the otter represent feminine power."

The three women laughed, and I just shook my head.

My dad said, "I'm hurt. I'm probably the only one here that doesn't have a spirit. And, Luke, you're only half Native American, and you've got two."

"Actually.", I said. "Anyone, if they believe, can have an animal spirit. But, I know what dad's would probably be."

"I'm afraid to ask this. But, what?"

"A grumpy old bear."

Everyone, but my dad, laughed. And, he just said, "Nice."

Caley's mother then looked at us, and asked, "Now you two. Care to tell me what White Antelope meant about you two being too close?"

"Mom.", Caley said, "You know that Luke and I are close. We mean a lot to each other, and it's more than from what happened in the park. We feel things together. When we visited Spirit Dancer's grave, we both felt her presence. And, she was happy that we were there together.

"White Antelope even sees it. In the way we dance together. In how I accept Luke's two spirits. And, maybe he sees more than what he's even telling us.

"But, what he was talking about was in Luke not seeing my depression. That we're so close that he couldn't see it. But, when we sit the vigil together our spirits will become closer. And, then he should be able to sense things about me like he can with others."

"You two are only sixteen. And, I know that we all know how you feel about each other. You haven't hidden it very well."

"Mom. I haven't tried to hide anything. And, I don't think Luke has either. We love each other.

"And, there's something that I don't even think Luke knows. When I first met him, I could sense that there was something really special about him. And, I really wanted him to notice me, and he finally did. He's always been special to me."

"What you told his brother that time, really surprised me.", Caley's mother said. "But, it also opened my eyes to where things seem to be going between you two."

"Mine too.", my mother said. "Caley also surprised me. She was right up front about how she felt."

"I've even heard them tell each other how they felt."

"I have too. And, seeing how they react when the other is hurt really tells me how they feel."

We sat there in silence for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, I asked, "Well?"

Caley's dad, who is usually the strong silent type, said, "Kids. We just don't want to see you make any mistakes."

"Daddy.", Caley said, "We do love each other. And, we love you guys. But, we know where to stop. Luke and I both want to go to college, and know that being married and having a child would make that almost impossible. We've never talked about this, but we know how each other feels about it.

"Realize that we respect each other in all ways."

After another one of those silent periods. My mother finally said, "Well. We asked. And, I guess Caley told us."

"Yes.", Caley's mother said, "I guess she did. What do we do now?"

"Nothing. I think no matter what, that these two are going to be together."

"You're right. He did risk his life for her."

"And, I'd risk my life for him.", Caley said.

"This is hard for a mother to admit.", her mother said. "But, I'm beginning to see that you two really belong together."

I looked at Caley, and said, "After all of that, I know for sure that you're more mature than I am." Then looking at our parents, I said, "Guys. Caley surprised me again. She knows me better than I know myself. She said it all. And, there's only one thing that I can add, and that's that I also love her."

Our mothers looked at each other, and my mother said, "I guess we now know for sure what we'd suspected. And, if it's true love, and I think it is, there's nothing that we're going to do about it. Even if we wanted to.

"They know what's in their hearts. And, we need to accept it."

My dad said, "I accepted this a long time ago. Seeing how they've gone through things together. How they interact with each other. How they respect each other. You could feel the love and respect between them. You just knew that they love each other."

I looked at my dad, smiled, and said, "You know. Maybe not a grumpy old bear, but a wise old bear."

That got a laugh, and my dad just shook his head.

Two weeks later, on a Friday, I picked up Caley for school. As she got in the pickup, I asked, "Did you have a dream last night?"

"Yes.", she replied. "And, I figure you did too?"

"Yes. But, tomorrow is the Pow Wow."

"And, your birthday."

"I wanted to dance at the Pow Wow."

"Me too. But, if we're supposed to sit our vigil tomorrow, we need to do it."

"I guess we'll just have to miss the Pow Wow."

"Do you know where we're supposed to go?"

"No. But, White Antelope said that we'd know the way. I'm going to see if dad will let me have the Jeep."

"The Jeep?"

"Not knowing where we're going. I want to be able to use any of the roads, even the fire roads."

"Oh."

Neither of our parents were happy about not knowing where we were going. But, knowing that White Antelope knew about all of this, made them feel a little better.

In my dream about the vigil, I had been Little Fawn. So, on Saturday I became Little Fawn. I sat at my mother's vanity and braided my hair. Then applied my makeup. Not heavy like it'd do if I was dancing, but just enough to bring out Little Fawn. The more I do this, the more I love doing it. The girl looking back at me from the mirror looked so at ease as to who she is, so confidant, so strong, so pretty.

I'd borrowed a fairly plane Native American cloth dress from my mother. But, I wore the choker that I'd worn the first time I'd danced. My moccasins were also plane. And, no head band. It was a simple look. After all, we were probably going into the woods somewhere, and I didn't want to get the good clothes dirty.

When I went downstairs, my mother said, "Honey. You be careful."

"I will.", I replied.

"Do you have everything that you'll need?", my dad asked.

"Yes. I've got water, food, and everything else."

"I sure wish we knew where you're going."

"Me too. But, I think that White Antelope knows where we're going. I think it might be one of his special places."

"Are you taking a rifle with you?"

"Yes. Knowing that we could end up in the back country, and not knowing what we could run into. I figured that it might be a good idea."

"I guess I did teach you at least one thing."

"Daddy. You've taught me a lot."

As I was leaving to pick up Laughing Maiden, I gave my parents a hug. And, my mother asked, "Any idea of when you'll be home?"

"No. I just hope it won’t be an all night thing. But, we’re sitting a vigil, so it probably will be."

"Okay. We won't wait up."

I drove over to Laughing Maiden's house, and went in. She was waiting for me, and was also dressed in a fairly plain dress. Her parents asked basically the same questions that mine had. But, her mother said, "You know. I'll be up all night waiting."

"Mom.", Laughing Maiden said, "Please don't. We'll be fine."

"I know you will. But, I'll still be up."

We gave both of them hugs, and as we walked out the door, I heard her father say, "I can't get over how good Little Fawn looks no matter how she dresses."

As we got in the Jeep, Laughing Maiden asked, "Any idea where we're going?"

"Not really.", I replied. "I did put the G.P.S. in, so that we could back track. But, I don't think that we'll need it."

As we come to an intersection when I knew we had to turn, she'd say, "We need to turn here." And, point in the direction we needed to turn.

It was like we both knew where we were going. And, we were going into the back country of the reservation. And, we were going up into the mountainous area. The roads were getting worse and worse. And, we were finally on one lane fire roads. And, I was glad that I'd brought the Jeep. Because the roads, if you could call them that, were getting really rutted.

Finally we rounded a corner, and the road ended at a drop off. At the bottom of the drop off was a river. And, it was almost a hundred feet below us. We knew that we were where we were supposed to be. We sat there for a minute and just looked at the view. It was spectacular. There was a valley below us, and more tree covered mountains across from us.

When we got out of the Jeep, there was a trail that led further uphill into the woods. We grabbed everything out of the Jeep, my backpack, the blankets, the rifle, and a jug of water.

"Is this one of White Antelope's special places?", Laughing Maiden asked.

"Yes. And, I can see why.", I replied.

We started following the trail, and it ran along the drop off. We hiked about a half of mile, and came to a clearing. And, we both knew this was the place. The clearing had a small wickiup on one side, with a fire pit in front of it. There were a couple of large logs between the fire pit and the wickiup to sit on. There was also a nice stack of firewood that looked like it had been recently added to. The view from in front of the wickiup was better than the one where we'd parked the jeep.

We looked inside the wickiup and there was room for maybe three or four people. There was also a small fire pit in the middle of the floor, and a sleeping mat. And, it looked very clean. We put all of our things inside the wickiup, and I laid a fire in the outdoor fire pit for later.

Laughing Maiden whispered, "I've got to go."

"Go? Go where?", I asked.

"To the bathroom. Where do we go?"

"In the woods."

"In the woods!?"

"Yeah. You've never been camping?"

"No. Not really. Just a cabin in a National Park."

"And, I bet that it had indoor plumbing."

"Yeah. It did."

"And, you call yourself a Native American?"

"You're really a boy. And, it's easy for you. But, I'm a girl."

"Well. I know girls always sit. So I guess just squat and go."

"Oh God. I don't know if I can."

"Just try. You'll be able to do it."

"Okay. I'll try. Do we have any T.P.?"

"Of course."

I took a pack of folded toilet paper out of my backpack, and handed it to her. She looked at me and said, "Where?"

I looked around, and saw a place that would be hidden by some bushes. And, I pointed and said, "Over there. Behind the bushes."

"Okay. I'll try."

"You'll be fine. And, I'm going over this way and go too."

"Okay."

"Oh. Watch out for poison ivy. You do know what that looks like?"

"Yes! I know what that looks like."

I was back before she was, and when she came back, I asked,"Was it that bad?"

"No. Not really. But, what if I have to go the other way?"

"The other way?"

"You know. The other way."

"Oh that. Well. I've got a small shovel with me. You go back into the woods, dig a cat hole, go, and fill the hole in."

"Oh God."

"We're going to have to take you camping. Real camping. Go backpacking. Sleep in a tent. Cook over an open fire. Maybe even do an overnight canoe trip."

"You've done that?"

"Not recently. But, my dad and I use to do it all the time."

"You know. That sounds like fun. Sleeping in a tent with you."

Then we walked over to the edge and stood looking at the view. Someone had strung a couple lengths of rope between trees, as a kind of fence. It was an almost straight drop down to the river.

Laughing Maiden cuddled up close to me, and I held her close. She said, "I could live here."

"It would be pretty.", I replied. "But, with the snows up here in the winter, you'd be snow bound."

"That would be fun, if you were there."

Then I felt the first rain drop. We'd been looking east, and hadn't seen the clouds approaching from the west. I turned and looked west, and there were some big, black, clouds. Then we heard a clap of thunder. Laughing Maiden jumped. And, I said, "We'd better get in the wickiup, or we're going to get soaked."

I just hoped that the wickiup was as good at shedding rain as it looked. And, I said, "That was stupid of me. Not checking on the weather."

"But, wouldn’t we have come anyway? Because it's the time that we're supposed to sit vigil together.", she asked.

"Yes. We would have. But, I'd have brought the rain gear out of the Jeep."

We got into the wickiup just as it started to rain really hard. And, it looked like it would shed the rain. There was a small pile of firewood in the wickiup, and I laid and lit a fire in the small fire pit. Soon there was a nice fire burning, and we sat there next to each other just watching the fire.

Every time there was a crack of thunder, she jumped and cuddled closer. Finally I asked, "Are you afraid of thunder?"

"Just a little.", she said. "It makes me a little nervous."

Just then there was a lightning strike close by, and she really jumped. She wrapped her arms around me. I looked at her, she looked at me, and we kissed. A nice long, deep, kiss. While we were kissing there was another lightning strike, and she didn't even flinch.

When we broke the kiss, she whispered, "I guess when I'm with you that it doesn't bother me."

"That's fine.", I replied. "I love your kisses. And, if I get one for every lightning strike, I hope this storm lasts all night."

But, it didn't. It was a quick moving storm and was quickly across the valley. We got out of the wickiup, and I re-laid the fire in the fire pit with dryer wood. I also took a quick look around, to make sure that the storm hadn't started a fire anywhere in the woods. And, it looked like it hadn't.

As the sun was setting, I lit the fire in the big fire pit, and we ate the food that I'd brought. As the temperature cooled off, I got out the blankets, wrapped them around both of us, and we cuddled together. We sat there listening to the sounds of the forest, and watching the fire. I made sure that the fire didn't die down.

She laid her head on my shoulder, and I pulled her closer. I laid my head on her head. And, we must have dozed off.

And, sometime later, something startled us awake. The fire had died down to hot coals. And, like it does in these mountains, it had quickly cooled off. So, I quickly got the fire going again, sat back down next to her, and pulled her close.

She whispered, "Did you have the same dream that I did?"

"I don't know. But, I did have a dream.", I replied.

"Was it an otter and fawn playing together?"

"Yes. And, they were joined by a wolf."

"Yes. And, the three of them played together. Did you also dream about the Rite of Seven Steps?"

"Yes."

"What do you think it means?"

"I know what it means. And, I think that you do too?"

"I do. It means that we're to be married."

I smiled at her, and said, "It does. I also dreamed that we were still dancing together at Pow Wows."

"Me too."

"And, something tells me, that because our spirit animals were playing together, that our spirits are now close enough that I'll be able to see your problems. And, anything that's bothering you. Is that too close for you?"

"No.", she replied. "The closer you are to me the better I feel."

I didn't mention it, and neither did she, but when I saw our spirit animals playing together, Spirit Dancer was standing there smiling. Then she sat on the ground, and the otter, fawn, and wolf, came over to her, and laid down in front of her. Maybe she didn't appear in Laughing Maiden's dream. But, maybe she did.

We didn't know what time it was, but I didn't want to drive out of here in the dark. So, we sat together until the fire died down to just glowing embers. And, then we could see the stars, and there were a lot of them. We sat there and looked at them for a while.

We went into the wickiup, and I relit the fire. And, we cuddled together under the blankets on the sleeping pad, and were quickly asleep. The birds singing in the morning woke me up, and I was cuddled up to Laughing Maiden. She stirred, and said, "I love to hear the birds singing in the morning."

"Me too.", I said. "We'd better straighten this place up, and head home."

"Why? I like it here."

"You do."

"Yeah. Because I'm with you."

I rolled her over and kissed her. She looked up at me, and asked, "Is this our first camp out?"

"And, it won't be our last."

"Promise."

"Yes.", and I kissed her again.

Then, I said, "I've got to ask this again. But, are you really okay with me dressing as Little Fawn?"

She smiled at me, and said, "Honey. Yes. I don't love how you look or dress. I love what's in your heart and spirit. But, I do love it when you dress as a girl. You always seems so at ease with yourself. So, at peace. And, honey please stop worrying about if I love Little Fawn. I love Little Fawn as much as I love Little Wolf."

And, we kissed.

Then she said, "Remember when we threw the sticks in the fire at the Fire Ceremony?"

"Of course.", I replied.

"Do you know what my prayer with the second one was?"

"No. You wouldn't tell me."

"It was to spend the rest of our lives together."

"Really. Why do we think so much alike?"

"What do you mean?"

"That's what my prayer was too."

"You're kidding me?"

"No. My prayer was that you and I spend the rest of our lives together."

As she pulled me down into another deep kiss, she said, "I love you so much."

I couldn't answer her in words, as we were in a long, deep, kiss. But, I think she knew that I loved her too.

We finally got the wickiup and the area around the fire pit cleaned up. And, hiked back to the Jeep. We stood there for a while looking at the view. Then started heading back home. Every once in a while we'd check for a cell signal. When we finally had one, Laughing Maiden called our parents and told them that we were alright and on the way home. While she was talking to my mom, she said, "Let me ask him."

Then she said, "Honey. Your mom wants to know if you're up for a birthday dinner tonight?"

"Sure.", I said. "I'm hungry now."

"Did you hear him?" . . . "I wouldn't miss it." . . . "Give them a call. They'd probably be happy to." . . . "Okay. He'll be straight home after he drops me off." . . . "Bye."

"What was that all about?", I asked.

"Just your mom asking me if I wanted to come for dinner. And, if my parents might want to come too."

"You know. Yesterday was the best birthday that I have ever had."

"It was?"

"Yeah. I was camping in the woods. And, I was doing it with you."

We decided to not tell our parents anything until we were all together.

Later that day, we were all together at my house. My parents, Caley's parents, Caley, and me.

I asked where Kimi was, and Caley's mother said, "She's at her grandmothers."

"Why?", I asked.

"She really likes staying at her grandmothers. So, it was a treat for her."

We had a nice dinner, and some great cake. And, I got some nice things. Caley gave me a very pretty blue and white choker.

Then as we were sitting on the patio, Caley's mother asked, "Are you two going to tell us about last night?"

"Sure.", I said. Then I told them about the drive up the mountain, and how happy we were to have the Jeep. We told them about the clearing with the wickiup. About the thunderstorm. About the view. About the drive home. I didn't want to embarrass Caley, so I left out the bathroom incident. But, I did mention about her never camping. My dad commented that we needed to take her camping sometime.

Then her mother asked, "You were sitting vigil. Did anything happen?"

"Oh that.", Caley said.

"Yes daughter. That."

Caley looked at me, and I said, "Go on. You tell them. You'll do a better job."

Caley told them the story of sitting in front of the fire, falling asleep, and having the same dream. She told them that we saw our three animal spirits playing together, and how I felt that it showed me that it brought them closer. So, that I'd now be able to sense things from her. She also told them about seeing us still dancing at Pow Wows. And, we felt that it meant that we'd continue dancing together.

She didn't mention dreaming about the Rite of Seven Steps.

When she was done, her mother asked, "Is that all?"

Caley and I looked at each other. And, I said, "Yeah. That was basically it."

"Was it?", my mother asked.

"Well. Maybe not.", I said. Then I looked at Caley, and said, "Think we should tell them?"

"Might as well.", she replied.

"Go on."

"No. You tell them."

"No you."

My dad said, "Stop! Luke. You tell us."

"Okay dad.", I said. "There was another part to our dream."

"Go on."

"You all know what the Rite of Seven Steps ceremony is. Don't you?"

"I don't.", my dad said.

Caley's mother said, "It's a wedding ceremony."

"Oh!"

"Yes.", I said. "We both dreamed about the Rite of Seven Steps wedding ceremony. And, we were the couple."

"I see."

Our mothers looked at each other. Then my mother said to Caley's mother, "Remember what we talked about with White Antelope?"

"Of course.", Caley's mother said.

"Shall we?"

"Might as well?"

"What's going on?", I asked.

"Just sit there and you'll see.", my mother said, as she got up, and walked into the house.

I looked at Caley, then at my dad, and asked him, "Dad. What the heck is going on?"

He looked at me, and just said, "You'll see."

We sat there and waited for my mother to come back. She was back shortly, and sat back in her chair. Both Caley and I just looked at her trying to figure out what was going on.

Finally she said, "When you told us that you were going to go and sit a vigil together. Caley's mother and I went and talked with White Antelope. He told us a number of interesting things. And, one was about what you told us about, the Rite of Seven Steps wedding ceremony.

"It shocked both of us. Knowing how young you are. But, he pointed out that age has nothing to do with it. It's the connection between the two souls. He told us that he's never seen it in someone your age before. But, he's not surprised that it happened. He says the first time he saw you together that he knew that there was something.

"Caley's mother and I talked long and hard about it. And, we finally decided to, as we've done with Luke's two spirts, support you. And, hopefully guide you to a long and happy marriage when the time comes. And, hopefully that is a number of years from now.

"I also told Caley's mother, that I had something to give you. And, she agreed that it would be a good idea to do it. And, so did White Antelope."

I know, I was just sitting there not believing what I was hearing. I looked at Caley, and I think that she didn't believe any of this either.

"Mom.", I asked. "What are you talking about? Where not ready for something like that."

"Honey.", she said. "The four of us love both of you very much. And, you know that we know how you feel about each other. Back when Caley was attacked, I hurt as much as her mother did. It was like my own daughter being attacked. Caley's mother and I have talked a lot about you two."

"And, Luke. You're like a son to me.", Caley's mom said. "Not because you saved her. But, because of who you are. We know that it will be sometime before you are ready to take the big step, but we know that it will happen."

"Now.", my mother said. "Luke. I have something for you. It belonged to my mother. She gave it to me just before she passed over. And, she told me that I should give it to you or Steven when you found that special person. I don't know if Steven has, but I know you have. This was her wedding ring. It's silver and turquoise. It's your decision if you give it to her now, as a promise ring. Or, keep it until you're married, and give it to her as a wedding ring."

She handed me a ring box. I opened the box, and the ring was gorgeous. It was silver, with some very pretty engravings, and there were pieces of turquoise inlaid into it. I looked at Caley and she was quietly crying. I got up, took her hand, and as I led her off the patio, I said, "Excuse us. We'll be right back."

I led Caley to the bench in the group of pines. We sat quietly for a while. Then I looked at her, and she was still quietly crying. I asked, "Honey. Why the tears?"

She looked at me, smiled, and said, "Because I'm so happy. All the important people in the world know how we feel about each other, and accept it. But, most important of all, I'm with you."

I wiped the tears out of her eyes. Then I took the ring out of the box, and slipped it on her left ring finger. And, I said, "Caley. I didn't need all of this to tell me that I love you. Someday I will marry you. And, I want you to wear this ring as the promise of my undying love for you until such time that I give you an engagement ring."

She looked at the ring on her finger, looked up at me, wrapped her arms around my neck, and we just held each other. She finally pushed back, looked at me, and she was still crying. But, she said, "Luke. As the Great Spirit is my witness. I pledge my love to you and only you."

We kissed for a long time. Then, Caley looked at me, and said, "I'll wear this ring until we decided it's time to become engaged, then I'll wear your engagement ring. But, I would love to have this ring as my wedding ring."

We kissed again, then we got up, and walked back to where our parents were. We walked up to where our parents were sitting hand in hand. No one said anything, but just looked at us.

Caley held up her left hand. And, I saw our parents smile.

Caley and I survived the rest of high school together. I did continue to learn more about being a two-spirit person from White Antelope. Little Fawn and Laughing Maiden also danced together at Pow Wows, and Caley started competing again, and did very well. Well enough to become the youngest female Head Dancer in our tribe's history.

My parents and I took Caley camping a number of times while were in high school. The first time, was a little rough on her, but she adapted to roughing it fairly quickly. She actually took to cooking over an open fire or cook stove fairly quickly. And, she didn’t mind even carrying a backpack.

Our first camping trip alone, was right after we'd graduated from high school. She and I took a week long canoe trip together. I did spend some time teaching her the proper way to paddle a canoe before we went. On that trip, we learned other things about each other. Like, how much we could enjoy each other in a double sleeping bag. And, there were many camping trips after that.

We also survived college, and did so even though we were at separate universities. I was pre-med at one and she was studying education at another one. But, we were both close enough to come home every weekend, and of course on those weekend Little Fawn was around, and if there was a Pow Wow that weekend we danced together.

We were married right after Caley graduated with her bachelor's degree in education. And, we held our Rite of Seven Steps wedding ceremony during one of the Pow Wows. We wanted everyone there, and they were. Caley was dressed in a very pretty white buckskin dress and white moccasins. Her headdress was also very pretty.

If you don't know what the Rite of Seven Steps wedding ceremony is, it's a beautiful and meaningful wedding ceremony. The family and friends of the bride and groom make a circle around the fire and hold hands. Then the bride and groom take seven steps clockwise around the sacred fire. Each time a step is taken, a vow is said. The groom takes the first step and says his vow, and then the bride takes a step to join him and says her vow. And, they continue this until they've made seven steps, which makes one complete circle around the fire.

White Antelope performed our marriage ceremony. And, he was accompanied by a friend playing softly on a flute. When White Antelope was done, and we were married, a group of men playing a large two headed drum started playing and singing. Caley and I led a circle dance, and it was a big circle. The reception was fun, a lot of dancing, singing, good food, and good friends.

I still remember what our seventh vows to each other were. And, I cry every time I think of them. I had said, "O' my beloved goddess, as you have walked the seven steps with me, our love and friendship have become inseparable and firm. We have experienced spiritual union in God. Now you have become completely mine. I offer my total self to you. May our marriage last forever."

And, Caley had said, "My husband, by the law of the Creator, and the spirits of our honorable ancestors, I have become your wife. Whatever promises I gave you I have spoken them with a pure heart. All the spirits are witnesses to this fact. I shall never deceive you, nor will I let you down. I shall love you forever."

She's now wearing my grandmother's wedding ring as her own wedding ring.

Somehow I made it through medical school, and Caley earned her master in education as the same university. I did my residency at the hospital close to the reservation, which meant that we were close to home, and we lived with Caley's parents. We had our first child while I was in residency. And, after I finished my residency, we stayed on the reservation. And, our second and third child was born.

I drove Caley crazy by knowing what sex our children were going to be well before they were born, and I wouldn’t tell her. And, just before our children were born, Caley and I also had the same dreams about what our children's names should be. The first boy's name means Strong Deer, because we both dreamed of a big buck deer. We call him Buddy. The second boy's name means Spirit Warrior, because we dreamed of a warrior and of Spirit Dancer. And, we call him Tommy after my father. The girl's name means Star Dancer, as we dreamed of dancing under the stars. And, we call her Shelly. Our children even took to me being Little Fawn, as they became use to her as they grew up, and could understand what a two-spirit person was.

I became the doctor for the reservation, and I worked at the local hospital. I also had a free clinic for another small reservation that was about thirty miles south of us. And, even though I was a man of medicine, I still knew I was a two-spirit person, and I used that to help our people. What White Antelope had taught me, was always with me. And, Spirit Dancer seemed to always be there.

I continued to become Little Fawn, and Laughing Maiden and I continued to dance at Pow Wows. And, I guess my leadership showed, as I became head of emergency medicine at the hospital, and a member of the Tribal Council.

Kimi made a wonderful aunt. And, there was always a fight between her and our parents who would watch our children. The grandparents usually won out, and took turns, but Aunt Kimi was always there to help.

We taught our children their Native American heritage, and Laughing Maiden and Kimi taught them to dance. Our daughter was really a good dancer, and as she got older she looked remarkably like Nora, or Spirit Dancer, had. One of the boys was also a good dancer. But, the other one, not so much, but he loved the drum and to sing. But, all three of them loved to camp, and the five of us spent many nights sleeping under the stars.

One of the things that my spirits showed me, that I really didn't want to learn, was how sick my dad was becoming. I sensed it before he even knew. And, it took me a long time to get him to see the specialists. But, it was too late. I even went to where Laughing Maiden and I had sat our vigil, and spent a day in prayer. But, it didn't do any good. The vision of Spirit Dancer that I had that day, told me that a sad time was coming, and that I needed to be strong for my mother and the rest of the family. A month later he passed over. At least his three grandchildren got to know him.

My brother Steven? We, unfortunately, have no idea what he's up to. I even tried really hard to find him before our father passed over. But, couldn't locate him.

No, I didn't become a medicine man, but used the knowledge that White Antelope had given me to help our people. And, after White Antelope passed over, I helped our new medicine man, Gray Owl, learn. He, as White Antelope had, saw the strength of my spirits, and the knowledge that White Antelope had passed on to me. We visited all of White Antelope's sacred places together, including where Laughing Maiden and I had our vigil. And, when we visited that place, and were walking up to the clearing, Gray Owl stopped, and said, "There are a lot of strong spirits here. I also feel that your spirt is very strong here."

We sat at the fire ring, and I told him the story of our visit here. He smiled and told me that he could sense only good things from the visit that Laugh Maiden and I had made here. Then as we were standing looking at the view, Gray Owl said, "Your Guardian Angel is very strong. Isn't she?"

"Yes.", I replied. "If I didn't have Spirt Dancer for a Guardian Angel, I don't think that I'd have Laughing Maiden. And, I'd be very lonely and sad."

"I know of the ordeal that the two of you went through. And, I also know that your marriage was meant to be. So, Laughing Maiden had to be saved. And, your Guardian Angel will always be strong, and will always be with you and your family."

One thing that still puzzles me. Why did I receive two Eagle feathers when I sat my vigil on the Island of Dreams?