Tamara's Début   Part One   by Shiraz

Author's note: I am dedicating the reposting of Tamara's Debut to the memory of Gabi Bunton who edited this and other stories before her untimely death. RIP.
 
 
Friday 14th November 2014
 
Tom was walking from his school's dining room when John Hibbert, another sixth former, caught up. Despite his size, Tom was a relatively fast walker and he often used this to good effect in order to avoid unnecessary conversations.

"Tommy, have you heard?"

"Heard what John?"

"About the play?"

"What play?"

"The one at the theatre."

"What theatre?"

This conversation was rapidly going nowhere, Tom decided that he would get away.

"Got to go John, expecting a call from my folks."

"Okay Tommy, check out the web."

Tom reached his room on the third floor, using the stairs, a few minutes later. The school had installed a lift several years earlier under the disability legislation but no-one had ever needed it, so only the staff used it - it was effectively off-limits to all the students.

Tom had lied to John, his parents were somewhere in Europe this Friday night and would probably not call before Sunday, it was always like that. Sometimes, however, he did get an email from them.

First, he checked out the web. In this case it referred to St Andrew's internal website. On the front page was a notice asking for sixth form students to help out with a production of West Side Story at The Mill Theatre in Thurso. The notice did not say what part in the production the students would play, but did state that any students involved in the play would lose Wednesday and Friday evenings, plus all day Saturday, for the rest of November until the 12th of December when the play opened. Three nights were planned, depending on ticket sales.

The notice said to meet at the theatre on Millbank Road at ten the following day and to dress casually. The web notice added that an additional minibus would be available for students going into Thurso at 9am.

Tom then checked his emails and was not overly surprised that there was indeed one from his father. The brevity was not uncommon, "In Geneva. Speak Sun. Dad." It reminded Tom of a telegram where you paid by the word, not that he'd ever seen one. The next email was from Sarah Bonney who owned a clothes shop in Thurso.

Sarah seemed to know a bit more about the school than Tom did at times. In this case her email, timed several hours earlier, informed him that the Mill Players were asking for help from the school and hoped a few would go to the theatre on the Saturday morning. She suggested to Tom that it would be a good idea if he went to the shop first and to go to the theatre afterwards. She said for him to dress 'as usual'.

Tom shut the computer down and tried to watch some TV, but couldn't keep his eyes open. Reluctantly he got ready for bed and was asleep by nine thirty.
 
 
Saturday 15th November
 
Tom was up at seven the following morning and dragged himself into the shower. He spent extra time conditioning his shoulder length black hair, normally tied up into a short pony tail before heading back to get dressed. As with most Saturday mornings he reached for the suitcase that held his secret clothing stash. A pair of knickers went on first, then he picked up a bra. A week earlier he had insisted he would never wear a bra, but now he was holding a 32A training bra.

This is what Sarah had meant by the 'usual' clothing. Tom had felt for years that he should have been a girl but couldn't express himself at the all boys school. Sarah's shop, however, gave Tom a chance to be Tamara for a few hours each Saturday. Sarah had sent him home last weekend with a carrier bag of bits. He'd spent so much time going through the bag that he'd almost missed dinner. In the bag he'd found a selection of lingerie and a note from Sarah.
 

"Dear Tammy, I know you are uncomfortable with the idea of wearing a bra but you need to dress more like a sixteen year old girl than an eighteen year old boy. No-one is going to see you under a sweatshirt and a coat. Don't do this for me, do it for yourself.
Lots of love,
Sarah."

 
Tom had replied to Sarah's note by email the previous Sunday morning and they'd spent several days arguing, no discussing, the merits and risks. Tom was very logical normally, the trouble was that, as Tammy, logic went out of the window and emotions took over. It was true that Tammy did not consider herself to be eighteen, when Tammy was around she looked short for eighteen so always gave her age as sixteen.

Tom fastened the bra, he'd practised each evening for the past week, then pulled a camisole over it. He tugged on some tights and finished with his worn jeans and a sweatshirt. Finally he put some sports socks over the tights and stuck his feet into a pair of comfortable deck shoes that he wore around school outside of teaching hours. Then it was to the dining room for breakfast. The school clock sounded eight am as he reached there.

"Hey, Tommy?"

Tom glanced round, John was catching up.

"Did you check the web?"

"Morning John, Yes. I'll probably go there to see what's up. I've got some things to do in town first though."

"See you on the bus then."

Tom took his normal place after collecting a tray of cold breakfast provisions, washed down with a mug of coffee. He went to the school office and put his name down for permission to go to the theatre, even though he had authority for when he went into Thurso each Saturday. Schools love admin.

Outside the wind was up. The breakfast notices, always read by one of the deputy heads, had today warned of 80mph winds in the Scottish Highlands. Tom walked back to his room and made a check on his appearance before pulling on a winter coat and swapping his deck shoes for trainers.

On the way out the door he picked up his shoulder bag that held his make-up, as well as the more expected items like water, camera, music and spare scrunchies. The bag was unisex in look and didn't raise too many questions amongst the school's population. His seniority helped too.

He made it back downstairs, by the main entrance just before nine and walked out to the first minibus. Normally he would be one of three sixth formers on this bus, most went into town later for 'lunch'. Today however, fourteen sixth formers filled the first bus, many of the lower years might struggle to get into town before the 10am bus.

Tom put his bag on his lap then switched on his MP3 player and lost himself in some Jean-Michel Jarre "Equinoxe", it had a relaxing effect on him. He was jolted back into life as the minibus pulled up on Olrig Street. Today it's final destination was Mill Lane. Tom slipped past the other 17 and 18 year olds who alighted there and headed to Reids' Bakery for two pastries, before hurrying to Bonney's Boutique in a side street.

Once inside he slipped the bolt and went to the back of the store. Sarah was by the kettle.

"Do you have time for a coffee?'

"They said to be at the theatre at ten, so I ought to go straight there."

"You have plenty of time Tammy. I'm told they only want a couple of scenery-shifters, not actors. Once the boys have had the health and safety talk they'll probably be sent away. They want you later."

"Me?"

"Yes, do you remember last Saturday? You were spotted by Jill Davison from the theatre company. They were looking for a girl to play Anita. Your face is perfect, and you won't need much done to your hair."

"Sarah, you must be joking, me, out there?" Tom pointed towards the door.

"Tammy, I'm serious. You can do this. You need to do this if you're ever to survive in the real world. You have natural beauty, you just need to recognise it for yourself."

"I think I need that coffee." "Coming right up."

They sat to drink their coffee but Sarah noticed it was by now almost ten, so she took her coffee into the shop with instructions for Tom to change clothes.

What Tom found was not his normal dress, instead a mid length denim skirt and a woolly jumper. He wanted to ask Sarah but heard the shop door opening and the first customers arriving. Still wondering about the theatre and Sarah's odd statement he undressed and Tamara took over.

After she'd finished her simple make-up, Tamara took a look in the mirror full-length mirror and saw a teenage girl, 16 or 17 years old, stood there. A pair of loop earings completed the look. Outside of Tom's room, Tamara had never dressed like this, and certainly never this well. There was a call from Sarah and Tammy rushed to the shop, forgetting everything.

"Ah Tammy, this is Jill Davison."

"Pleased to meet you Ms Davison."

"Tammy, I just wanted a chat with you before we throw you into the lions' den. Have you done any acting before?"

"Just some small school plays, nothing else."

"And can you sing?"

This was one of Tom's strengths, but not one he bragged about. Tammy would have a different outlook. "Yes, why?"

"There's several songs, including a solo, and we only have 4 weeks to get ready."

"But why me?"

"Sarah told me all about you, about your natural beauty. I came in last Saturday but couldn't speak to you as you had to deal with that little problem."

The previous week Tammy had become very scared when the headmaster's wife had entered the shop. Sarah had covered for Tammy by suggesting it was the wrong time of the month.

"I'd like you to come down to the theatre at one for a try-out. Oh, do you speak Spanish?"

"Por qué?"

"Pardon?"

"That was Spanish for 'why'!"

"Right, because your character is Puerto Rican. Have you ever seen West Side Story?"

"No, but I know most of the songs."

"Right, I'll see you at one."

Jill Davison left, but Tammy was now having second thoughts, despite appearing to be very confident just a minute earlier. Now, however, was not the time to ask Sarah any questions as there was a steady stream of customers. They sat for a coffee and a pastry after Sarah turned the sign around just before one.

"Sarah, what exactly did you tell Mrs Davison?"

"If you mean did I tell her you were an eighteen year old boy, then no I didn't. As far as she's concerned you are my sixteen year old niece and I am your guardian whilst you are in Thurso.

"Oh, so almost the truth then. So what are we going to tell the school?"

"That's easy, so far as they are concerned, Tom Smart will be working in Wardrobe."

"With who?"

"With me, I look after the costumes. I need someone to carry them, hang them, get them ready. In practice I do it all myself, but what's the school going to know?"

"What about the other boys?"

"No more than four of them will get picked, that's the number of unfilled places. They will be so busy they'll not look for you."

"But what about this?" Tammy looked down and flared her skirt. "I can't leave the school like this and I can't arrive at the theatre as a boy!"

"Tammy, don't worry about that now. Get your bag, I need to drive you round to the theatre."

Tammy and Sarah made sure the front door was locked then headed out the storeroom exit, where Sarah had left her car. Five minutes later they pulled up by the old mill. Sarah, sensing Tammy's butterflies, ushered her in through the stage door. Sarah introduced her to Iain Brown, the director.

"Good afternoon Sarah. I take it this beauty is your niece?" Sarah nodded.

"Well, good afternoon Tammy. Jill was not kidding me when she said you'd be perfect for the part of Anita. Come this way and we'll try a few songs."

They walked over to a piano at one side of the stage where the musical director sat. Sandy Franklin was about twenty five and a brunette.

"Hello Tammy, can you stand there. Here's the lyric sheets. Ready?"

"Erm, yes."

She launched straight into 'America' but stopped a few bars in.

"No, no, no. You are Puerto Rican, sing like one."

Another few bars and she stopped again. "Better, but with more feeling, feeling."

Guessing what she meant, and pulling on Tom's knowledge of Spanish, she made it through the song at next attempt, breathless.

"We would have to do some work on that one, but you have promise. Now, the next one is 'A boy like that'."

Tammy worked for another hour before being dismissed finally noticing that another girl with black hair was waiting to audition. Tammy walked out of the theatre and back into the town, forgetting how she was dressed. Ten minutes later she was in Sarah's shop.

There were several ladies in the shop, two of them were waiting to pay. Sarah gestured towards the till and Tammy immediately started helping the first customer there. She had finished the second customer when the Headmaster's wife walked in the shop. The previous weekend Tammy had panicked when she'd seen Mrs McIntosh. This time she wanted to run but somehow stayed there. Mrs McIntosh browsed the rails before selecting a long purple skirt before heading into the changing room to try it on. Tammy looked over at Sarah, who was tidying up the shelves, and pointed at the store room.

Sarah took a moment to realise what Tammy meant and then followed her to the store room.

"She's back. What am I going to say if she speaks to me?"

"Just be friendly, she'll not recognise you."

"Can't you say I'm still on my period?"

"Don't be daft, you don't know anything about that do you? I'll have to educate you but for now, get back out there. I want you to tidy the jeans near the door. They're a mess."

Tammy started refolding the jeans.

"Tammy?" She spun round, Mrs McIntosh was stood there.

"Yes?"

"I understand you tested for the play earlier?"

"Yes Mrs McIntosh."

"I told Jill you'd be perfect." The Head's wife turned back so she could speak to Sarah, who was now stood at the till with a smile on her face. The phone rang and Sarah answered.

"Yes it is, oh she is? Ten? Right, she'll be there."

Sarah had a bigger smile on her face when she put the phone down. "You got the part. They want you there at ten tomorrow."

"But at ten I'm in the chapel! I mean, how can I get here?" Tammy just realised that Mrs McIntosh was still stood in the shop.

"Oh child, don't worry about that. I'm sure your aunt could help."

Tammy just stayed quiet, waiting for Sarah to intervene.

"Yes Mrs McIntosh, I'll sort that out. Can I ask your help on another matter?"

"Certainly."

"I've asked Tom Smart to help me with the wardrobe department. He'll be needed at the first fittings tomorrow morning. Could you take this letter and arrange him to be excused for the day?"

"I'll have to speak to my husband of course, it is his school after all." She laughed lightly, Tammy and Sarah joined in, for the sake of politeness. With that she paid for the skirt and headed out into the street.

"Tammy, I think you should get changed. You have a bus to catch."

"Okay, but how do I get here in the morning?"

"I'll come for you at nine. Can you send me an email later to confirm the school's okay with it?"

Tammy headed back to change and a few minutes later Tom walked back into the store. Sarah was just about to lock the door when their last customer returned.

"I was just about to ask if you'd seen Tom Smart today, but I see you're here. Has Tammy gone?"

"Yes Mrs McIntosh." Tom made an effort to use his southern accent to avoid discovery.

"I'm going back to the school now, would you like a lift?"

"If it's not too much trouble."

"Not at all. Are you ready?"

Sarah was walking back from the store-room with Tom's bag, into which she'd dropped a carrier bag. "I just need my bag. Thank you Sarah."

"Let's go. I'm in the carpark."

Tom wanted a quiet ride back on the bus but couldn't refuse the Head's wife. He ended up being probed about how he knew Sarah, and why he was in wardrobe and not on the stage. He gave her the prepared story of meeting her in the bakery and being asked to help in the storeroom whilst Sarah's daughter was in University. Then the subject of Tammy arose.

They were just coming through the school gates and Tom thought a quick reply would do. She had other ideas.

"What do you know about Tammy?"

"She helps her aunt on a Saturday and goes to a school near here. Apart from that we don't talk."

"Haven't you thought about meeting her of an evening? You might be able to get permission to go into town after dinner as you're in the Upper Sixth."

"I hadn't thought about it, plus a taxi wouldn't be cheap."

"I see."

Tom could sense that Mrs McIntosh was fishing for more information. Was she suspicious or was she trying to act as matchmaker? She pulled up and cut the ignition.

"It's gone five, you had best get changed for dinner."

"Yes Mrs McIntosh."

Tom escaped the car and bolted back inside, making a point of signing back in, something he was slack about.

Tom showered and dressed for the Saturday evening meal. It wasn't normally formal but a couple of the old boys were guests for the weekend so the head had suggested 'smart' wear. That meant suits for the older boys. Tom was uncomfortable in a tie but wore it out of a sense of duty. Dinner included several speeches aimed at the sixth form about careers. One old boy was in the Diplomatic Service, although Tom suspected this was a cover story, realising immediately that right now his own life was a cover. But which way round?

Tom was just about to leave the hall when the Head walked up. He had Sarah's letter in his hand.

"Mr Smart, are you doing this willingly?"

"Yes sir."

"I am just a little concerned that this is not appropriate for a young man."

"Sir, as you know my father wants me to go into international trade, but I have to learn somewhere. I deal with the stock control and ordering at the shop. Working with Ms Bonney has given me an outlook on small business, I am also happy to help her with the theatre."

"Smart, that is what I hoped you'd say. I'm now happy to endorse this. Will you include your experiences in your coursework?"

"Yes sir, definitely."

"Right, to expedite matters I have granted permission for you and two others, Hibbert and Small, to leave the premises at times when you do not have classes, but you must sign out. Understand?"

"Yes Headmaster."

The Head turned and headed back to the small group he had left. Tom, whilst excited, was also full of dread. What had he agreed to do?

Back in his room Tom checked his emails and sent Sarah a summary of his conversation with the head. A swift reply confirmed the nine o'clock pickup, and asked that he wore decent looking jeans, not the same ones as that morning.
 
 
Sunday 16th November
 
The following morning Tom was laying out his clothing for the day on his bed, including his lingerie when there was a knock at the door. He rapidly threw the duvet over the dainty items before heading for the door.

"Morning Tommy," said John Hibbert. "I hear you get to play with the frocks."

"Yeh, but I also get to see the girls at close quarters."

"Not so bad then. I'm going to understudy Lt. Schrank so I have to learn the part."

"When you're not moving scenery around?"

John gave Tom a stare and rapidly changed the subject.

"What are you going later? I could do with a hand with the script."

"Sorry John, I've got to go down to the theatre. I'm being picked up at nine and I haven't had breakfast, or dressed, in case you hadn't noticed."

With that, Tom dismissed the similarly pyjama-clad lad and, once the door was locked, retrieved his underwear and dressed. The previous day's carrier bag, hidden from Mrs McIntosh, had contained a couple of new bras and a pair of jelly-like mounds. Tom, not being completely ignorant, knew what they were but chose not to insert them until after breakfast.

He finished dressing, casually again, and headed to breakfast. Having returned to his room half an hour later he inserted the breast forms and put his sweatshirt back on, then his thick winter coat.

A few minutes later he was in the school's lobby signing himself off the premises. He heard the sound of wheels on gravel and put his head out the door, seeing Sarah's little car.

On the ride into town Sarah sensed he was a little tense so put the radio on and let the music fill the void. Before long she pulled up directly outside the shop. During the rest of the week parking in this area was prohibited, but today was different. Once inside Tom headed for the kettle.

"Tammy, when you've done that can you come to the changing room?"

Tom walked into the shop and saw Sarah stood outside the changing room. "Let's get you undressed. I want to measure you for your dress."

Tom started taking off his sweatshirt then remembered he was stood in full view of the main window. He quickly walked into the changing room itself where he continued his disrobing. Once down to his bra he felt uncomfortable. He'd not considered the breast forms once they'd warmed up but now they were obvious to him, and Sarah.

"Good, you wore them. Now Tammy turn round, your straps are wrong. That's better."

Tom took one last look at his 'breasts' and slipped into Tammy. Sarah picked up a tape measure and measured Tammy from the head down.

"Hmm, you've grown a little since I last checked. Still a size ten though. Wait there."

She returned with a red frock. The bodice was square cut and the dress hung from a pair of wide shoulder straps. Very 1950's.

Sarah's email of the previous day had reminded Tom to bring his half slips to the shop. as usual he had brought his bag with him. Tammy now put all three of the half-slips around her waist, Sarah then dropped the dress over her, zipping her up. Tammy turned to look in the mirror. The image was striking but she could still see Tom's face. Looking further down, however, her bust was very obvious.

"I think we might need a petticoat, these slips don't work. Stand still." Tammy froze, Sarah had a just put some pins between her lips and was now pinning the hem of the dress, and then proceeded to pin the shoulder straps.

"Just a little loose. But I don't think we could get away with any more here!" Sarah rubbed against Tammy's bust. "Slip out of the dress and get your jeans back on. You've an appointment."

"Where? The theatre?"

"No, now get a move on. Then go and sort out your face."

Tammy did as asked and returned ten minutes later, looking more like a girl than she had before.

"So where's this appointment?"

"Just along the street, You're going to see Sandy."

Tammy was about to ask her next question when she was pushed out of the shop door. Sarah stopped to lock the door then went four doors along the street to a hairdressers salon. The sign on the door said 'closed' but Sarah pushed the door and ushered Tammy inside, a middle-aged lady came out to meet them.

"Tammy, this is my dear friend Sandy. Please let her work her magic on you. Don't get worried, she has my instructions and will take care of you."

"Sarah, you promised!"

"Don't get upset. If we're going to do it, we have to do it right. Sandy is very discrete, unlike some of her staff."

"Tammy, I've given Sarah my word that you'll be able to adapt this style." Sandy did her best to calm Tammy. "Sit down at the sink, I need to sort your hair out, I can't do it if you're over there."

Where Tom had always wanted his hair to grow, he took little care of it, beyond regular washing and conditioning. Split ends were the biggest problem, the other being that it was lifeless.

"Not quite as bad as I thought, but we'll be an hour at least. Sarah, I'll bring Tammy along when we're done."

Sarah slipped out the door and along the street. Tammy felt very alone now, up until this minute, only Sarah knew his dual identity. Now Tammy thought she'd been exposed to a stranger, and had no say in the matter.

"Now, Tammy, you'll just have to trust me. I need to work my magic on your hair and repair a few years worth of damage. Now, put your arms through this and put your head over the bowl."

For the next hour or so Sandy worked at Tammy's hair, first cutting then layering. Finally she added some extensions to the sides and brushed her hair out. Whilst Sandy had put her hair up with clips, it was difficult to see what the end product would look like. Now Tammy could see clearly, Sandy had given her a bob-cut. Tammy didn't know what to say. How could she go back to the school like this?

Tammy was still in shock when she reached Sarah's shop, uttering only a weak thanks to Sandy. Inside she ran straight to the back of the shop in floods of tears. Sarah let her weep for a minute before walking up with a box of tissues. She pulled up a chair and sat with Tammy, handing her a tissue.

Sarah, knew that Sandy had got carried away, and perhaps should have told her the full story. Of course, Sandy had simply followed the description of Anita's character literally and created a hairstyle to die for, Unfortunately Sarah had failed to mention that Tammy was a boy attending St Andrews.

Sarah knew she was not helping. The story that Sandy had heard was that Tammy had experienced a few health problems and had been a late bloomer. She'd become a tomboy, finally giving that up when she was fifteen, but hadn't properly looked after her hair. This was to be her first major hairstyle for several years. Her acting and singing skills had won her the part but now her look had to match the character.

It had seemed quite a simple lie to Sarah. Now she was sat with an 18 year old physical boy who looked like a 1950s 16 year old girl. Even with his male clothes back on, Tom would not look like a boy. What could she do? Was it time to tell the truth and expose Tom? did she have that right?

"Tammy, look at me. I need to explain."

Tammy had stopped crying and now sat with her head down.

"Tammy, will you listen then? I wanted to help you and it's gone too far. Firstly Sandy did not know you were a boy so, apart from me, no-one else knows your secret."

Tammy sat up and took another tissue from Sarah. "What about my hair? What about my hair?!" Tammy wasn't shouting but her anger was clear.

"I don't know yet, but I'll think of something. Even if it means cutting it myself."

"That's not what I mean, I love it. I really do. But I can't go back to the school like this. They'd kill me."

"Tammy, you look gorgeous. We've got a few hours before you have to be back at the school so let's go down to the theatre."

"But I can't do the play now."

"Don't be silly girl, of course you can. You could wear a wig if needs must, but real hair looks so much better. Regardless, you are going to do this play. Right?"

"I don't know."

"Look, stop worrying for an hour and let's go have fun. They're expecting you at the theatre at two for rehearsal but we can have lunch first. Come on. Let's fix your make-up. I've got a dress for you to wear."

Thirty minutes later, Tammy's face was repaired and she looked demure in the checked frock. Sarah sprayed a little perfume on Tammy and handed her a short coat. Tammy was bustled out of the shop into the cold air, they walked the short distance to the Castletown Hotel.

They were sat there, having eaten, when one of Tom's teachers, Mr Small, stopped by their table with his wife. Mr Small was subdued, almost bored, his wife however was animated.

"Hello Sarah, what a surprise to see you, I must talk to you early next week about something I've seen. Now, who is this lovely lass?"

"Hello Joan, this is my niece Tammy. I'm sorry but we need to get back, Tammy is in the play next month, she needs to rehearse."

"Of course, don't let us delay you. In any case, I couldn't have George admiring your niece for too long, could I? Bye Sarah."

"Bye Joan, George."

They walked away, but not before the teacher swung his head round to have another look, followed by a rebuke from his wife. Tammy saw nothing of this, however Sarah didn't miss a thing. They left as soon as Sarah settled the bill. Back at the shop, Tammy was shaking. Sarah led her to a chair and sat next to her.

Tammy forced herself to speak, "Sarah, I'm going to get found out. I'll be ridiculed."

"No you won't. I'm going to talk to the Head."

"No! No! No!" Tammy burst into tears. Sarah couldn't console her and left Tammy crying. She went through to the rear of the shop and picked up the phone.

Tamara's Début   Part Two   by Shiraz

 
Sunday 16th November Continued
 

As Sarah went for the shop's phone, Tammy's mobile rang. She took a few moments to realise it was her phone and, although she didn't really want to speak to anyone, retrieved the phone from Tommy's backpack. No number was shown.

"Hello?"

"Tom, are you alright? I tried to get you at the school but they said you were out. The school is also trying to reach you, but they don't have your mobile number apparently."

"Yes mum, but they do have my number. I'm in town at the moment, is something wrong?"

"Yes, apparently there was a severe bout of food poisoning after breakfast. Did you have anything hot?"

"No, just muesli and a black coffee. I wasn't very hungry."

"Well, the school called had to inform Highland Council. The health inspectors have had to close the kitchens, of course that means the school as well."

"Oh."

"Is that all you can say, do you realise what that means? I'm in Lausanne and your father's in Geneva. He's not due back in the UK for two weeks so I'm staying by Lake Geneva. There's no point in me being at home on my own, what about you, I'll get a ticket booked so you can fly out, I said that to the school. You know which hotel I'm in, you stayed here last winter."

"Mum, I'm rehearsing for a play and want to stay close to the school."

"A play? You never said anything about that."

"I only found out yesterday myself."

"So what will you do?"

"I'll stay locally. There's the Castletown Hotel plus some guest houses. The school could be open in a few days."

"I'm not sure about that, it might not be until next weekend."

"Mum, I'm 18 years old and can take care of myself." Tommy did not say that he'd been having to take care of himself for the past ten years. His mother refused to accept that perhaps she had abandoned her son at that school. That she knew so little about what he did, or who he'd become, was no surprise to anyone who knew the family.

"Okay, but I want to be able to check with somebody."

"Mum, I'm with Sarah Bonney. She knows me and is the local businesswoman who's helping me with my Business A Level."

"Can I speak to her?" He handed Sarah the phone who'd been stood there for a few seconds.

"Good afternoon Mrs Smart."

"Ah, hello. I understand you know my son."

"Yes, very well in fact. He is using my business as part of his coursework, with the school's approval."

"He never said, ah well, would you mind keeping an eye on him for me? Here's my mobile number."

Sarah wrote down the number and continued to speak to Tommy's mother for a minute, exchanging contact details. Tammy went to the small bathroom and washed her face, her mascara has streaked. Even without make-up she was still Tammy, Sarah came to find her.

"Tammy, it's settled, you're staying with me. Your mum will expect regular contact and she said you're to fly to Geneva if you feel the need."

"What about the school?"

"I spoke to the school office, they told me the same as your mum, but they've said they want you to collect any clothes and bits you need. Most of the school are leaving now, the rest will be gone later. The school is running coaches to the airport, there's a special shuttle flight to Glasgow being arranged so kids can get south easier. Privately the school secretary thought it could be closed for two weeks, remember that TV Chef who had to close his restaurant?"

"Yes, I remember, the Duck or something. Sarah, how do I get the rest of my bits, looking like this?"

"Let's wait until after 4 when it's getting dark, the airport coaches will have gone by then; we'll find a hat you can wear. You still have the clothes you wore this morning, don't you?"

"I suppose it might work. Don't forget that I need to let the school know where I am, they might want to see me about coursework as I'm staying locally."

"I doubt that, apart from those who live locally, most of the teachers will have left as well, and your mum told the school you'd be in Geneva, didn't she? They wouldn't try to send anything to you there."

"I suppose you're right, it just seems wrong telling another lie."

"I didn't get where I am ... you know what I mean. Look, I've got plenty of experience in making the best of a bad situation. This'll be excellent experience for you, and you'll have time to know the part of Anita to perfection. Let's have a coffee."

Sarah then phoned the theatre to let them know Tammy couldn't make it, but only reached the answerphone, so left a brief message.

An hour later they pulled into the school carpark. Tom was wearing a woolly hat Sarah had found back at her house. "My ex-husband's" she explained. Sarah stayed in the car, that avoided unecessary questions, the few students still there were too busy with their own affairs to worry about Tommy. He grabbed a case, packing all of Tammy's clothes, noting how little he actually had, plus a few changes of Tommy's just in case. He added his wash bag, laptop, camera and a few other bits. He just remembered the charger for the mobile phone as he reached the door.

Down in the foyer he went to the school office and spoke to the Head's secretary, between her many phone calls. His passport was on the table next to a signing-out sheet. There was a form asking for contact details, Tom put the name of the hotel in Lausanne and his mobile number plus outside email address, even though all this was in his file. He made it outside without incident and loaded his bags into her car. Just as Tommy was walking to the car Mr Small approached. This was not good timing.

"Smart, did I see you in town earlier?"

"Sir, I was in town but I didn't see you."

"I may be mistaken but I saw a girl who looked just like you."

"Sir, could that have been Tamara Bonney? She's a cousin who sometimes visits Thurso."

"Right Smart, where are you off to now?"

"I'm staying in town tonight and flying out tomorrow. It's too late to go now, I missed the coaches."

The teacher moved towards the school and shook his head. Tommy got into the car and sat, almost frozen with fear and relief at the same time.

"Sarah, that was too close. If he'd have seen you too, he might have worked it out. I didn't like lying to him one bit, that could get me thrown out of the school."

"Tammy, you did really well. There was always a chance of being seen but you needed to be able to handle it,let's get moving."

Tommy sat there in contemplation for the ride to Sarah's house on the Western side of the town, Once there, they carried his bags in.

"Tammy, use the guest room at the top of the stairs on the left. Have a wash and get changed. Did you bring your make-up?"

"Yes, of course."

Tommy went up and came back down thirty minutes later as Tammy. As they'd eaten well at lunchtime, only a sandwich was needed. By nine Tammy was exhausted but realised she had no nightwear. Sarah loaned her a nightie but commented that Tammy needed some more clothes, that would be tomorrow's job.
 
 
Monday 17th November
 

At breakfast the following morning Tammy was again trying to work out if this was a good idea. She'd tried to think it through in bed but had fallen into a deep dreamless sleep.

"Tammy, your coffee's getting cold. I've got to open up the shop in forty-five minutes and you're not dressed, take your coffee up with you and get in the shower."

Thirty minutes later, Tammy was back down. While she'd been in the shower Sarah had been through Tammy's limited wardrobe and laid out a set of clothes for the day. The wind was still fairly strong, and from the North-West but they would be sheltered in the town centre.

Sarah had chosen a denim skirt but put a pair of opaque tights there as well. A blouse and Tammy's only clean set of underwear finished the day's clothes. As Tammy only normally appeared on a Saturday, she didn't need many clothes, nor undies. Things would be different for now.

They reached the shop just before nine, Tammy was sent to the bakery while Sarah opened up. Once she returned with the usual bag of pastries, Tammy went to clear space for a delivery that was expected. Again, this was new as there were no deliveries at the weekend. The van arrived at ten and Tammy opened the shop's rear doors, she went out to help but was turned back by the driver.

"Leave this to me lassie, what's your name?"

Sarah came into the storeroom just as the driver spoke.

"Bill, please leave her alone, she's only sixteen and doesn't need any attention from you!" Turning to Tammy she asked her to check the shop as the bell had sounded, taking the delivery note to check the order. The driver left a few minutes later, Sarah switched on the kettle and made two mugs of coffee.

In the shop, Tammy was helping an elderly lady she'd never seen before who wanted to know everything about Tammy, who initially struggled to recall the cover story and had to invent a few new details. The lady, who said her name was Elsie, tried on several winter coats before settling on the first one she'd picked up.

"Good morning Elsie, I see you've met my niece." Sarah put the two mugs of coffee on the counter.

"Yes Sarah, she's a lovely lass."

A few minutes later she was gone, having handed over £60. With the shop now empty they sat and ate the pastries.

"Tammy, you could do with some more clothes. I can't completely kit you out and in any case I don't have much in your size. If there's anything you do like, let me know and I'll order it, but you'll have to pay for it at cost. I've afraid business isn't good enough for me to be more generous. Grab your coat and walk into the High Street, get yourself some knickers and bras first, just plain ones will do, you need enough for a week or so, ten of each, right? Then sort out some practical clothes, not party stuff!"

Tammy grabbed her small purse, containing Tommy's Visa debit card. She quickly realised that the three hundred pounds in the account wouldn't last very long and she'd have to transfer some money. First item however would have to be a shoulder bag, her skirt did not have any pockets!

"Sarah, I know I need probably more money than I have in my account right now, so I can't get everything, not right away. When we get back to your house I can use my laptop to transfer some money but right now I have to limit things. If I were to use my Amex card, dad would see the transactions."

"Right, concentrate on the essentials, enough for the next two days for now."

Tammy walked out into the lane and turned towards the High Street. The wind was biting, catching Tammy's skirt. This was a steep learning curve in living as a female. Tammy did a quick reckoning of what she needed and headed to the first of the shops, steering away from the more expensive stores. An hour later she dropped the first two bags into Sarah's Boutique and went back to her retail therapy, some therapy this was.

Finally, cold and hungry, Tammy struggled back to the shop with three more bags. Over her shoulder was a new bag, holding phone, wallet and lipstick. In many of the shops she'd met Sarah's customers who recognised her immediately. Of course, the first thing they wanted to know was why Tammy wasn't at school on a Monday morning. Tammy gave a weak excuse of her school allowing home revision before mock exams.

Tammy had been back in the shop for a few minutes and was making a coffee to warm up. The doorbell went as someone walked in, Tammy paid little attention as Sarah was in the front of the shop and assumed it was a customer.

"Tammy, are you decent?"

"Yes, Sarah. Why?"

"There's a policeman to see you. I'll put the closed sign up and bring him through."

Tammy wanted to run but had nowhere to run to.

"Tammy, I'm PC St James. Do you mind if I ask you some questions?"

"Erm, not at all, constable. Would you like a coffee?"

"Yes please."

The three of them sat on chairs that Sarah had arranged. The constable took a few sips of the coffee before he spoke.

"Tammy, I overheard what you said to a few of the ladies in town and I had a chat with them after you moved on. They told me you normally only worked here on a Saturday and that you were Mrs Bonney's niece. Also, you seem to have spent several hundred pounds in town, that is a lot for a sixteen year old girl."

"Constable, before we go any further, is Tammy being accused of any offence?"

"Not at the moment Mrs Bonney, it's that I'm also the truancy officer and I need to follow up any under school age children seen in town."

"Sarah, I can't lie to the officer. Constable, what I am going to say may sound strange but unless you intend to prosecute me I'd prefer if what I am going to tell you remains confidential."

"You know I can't guarantee that, Miss."

"Okay, officer my real name is Tom Smart. I am eighteen years old, male and a student at St Andrews."

"If you're trying to wind me up, I suggest you start telling me exactly what's going on, Miss."

"Constable, this genuinely is Tom Smart. Tom, can you get your wallet?"

Tammy went to her new bag and pulled out Tom's wallet. She removed his school ID, bank cards, and an ID card for his father's company.

"There's a similarity, but don't tell me you're him."

"Sarah, I have an idea to sort this out, can you ring the school and ask them to contact me? Better still, constable, you call them and ask them to call my mobile to check I'm OK. You don't have to give a reason, I'll deal with any questions from the school."

The Constable rang the school and spoke to the school secretary. She confirmed Tom was a sixth former and agreed to call Tom. Before the Constable had put the phone back down, Tom's mobile was ringing.

"Hello, Tom Smart."

"Hello Tom, it's the school. Are you okay?"

Tom recognised the voice, "yes Mrs Adams. I'm fine. Is there a problem?"

"I'm not sure, a police officer was after you."

"If they call again, can you ask them to contact me direct, it's okay to give my number to the police."

"I will. Goodbye Tom."

"Bye."

Tom put his phone back in his pocket and looked at the officer. "Are you now satisfied that I am Tom Smart?"

"Yes, and since St Andrews is closed this is not a matter for a truancy officer anyway. However, are you going to give me a good explanation for why you are sat there looking like a sixteen year old girl and why you've been fooling everyone in town?"

Between Tammy and Sarah's high-speed explanations the officer found out about Tom's alter-ego, his business course, the theatre and that his mother approved of him staying with Sarah Bonney.

"Well, this qualifies as one of the strangest tales I've been told but, no, you are not committing any offence. I won't be submitting a report, but please don't get carried away and start trying to get any fake ID made up, that would be illegal. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes Constable."

He got up to leave and Sarah led him to the door, locking it behind him. She came back and sat with Tammy.

"Tammy, I should have thought of this, maybe it would be best if you flew to Switzerland?"

"Sarah, we should never have told everyone I was sixteen, then this would never have happened."

"Tammy, we can't be certain of that. Look, if you want to go then I'll drive you to Inverness this afternoon."

"Sarah, I'm happy being Tammy, being me. If I don't get to be Tammy now, then I might never have the chance. I know I have to go back to school as Tom and I have to go home at Christmas."

"Tammy, alright, but be careful. What am I saying? I'm the one who encouraged you. I'm the one who needs to be more careful as well, in case I put you in more trouble."

Tammy was about to answer when there was a knock on the window. Jill Davison was stood there so Sarah let her in and flipped the sign over.

"Sarah, is Tammy alright? A constable was asking questions in the shops and I've just seen him heading from this way."

"She's right here Jill, come through." Sarah led Jill through the shop, Tammy had disappeared into the toilet and wasn't expecting to see Jill when she came out, straightening her skirt.

"Hello Tammy."

Oh, hello Miss Davison"

"Tammy, it's Jill. Please don't be so formal. Are you alright? I saw that police officer leave the shop."

"Yes, thankfully he didn't want to take me away, at least not now."

"I hope you're not in any trouble. I don't want to have to look for another Anita."

"No, I'm still available for the play. Is there rehearsal this Wednesday?"

"Yes, although I'm not sure how many of the boys will be there. You know about St Andrews, don't you."

"Yes."

"Sarah, what about your junior wardrobe mistress?" She giggled at her own pun. "Tom was his name, wasn't it?"

"Jill, take a seat, this is Tom."

Jill shook her head. For the second time in one hour, Tammy was explaining her double life, this time to the lady who'd wanted Tammy for a starring part in her local production of West Side Story.

Jill sat there, listening quietly, Sarah put the kettle on again and quickly made Jill a cup of tea, apparently she didn't drink coffee. Tammy crossed her legs, smoothed her skirt and, mostly in jest, said to anyone listening, "would anyone else like to hear my story, roll up, roll up, to Thurso's latest freak show."

"Sarah, thanks for the tea but I think I need a real drink, it looks like Tammy does too after her stressful day. Unfortunately she doesn't look eighteen so that could be a problem."

"Jill, do you know the little hotel round the corner? They're very discrete and wouldn't have a problem with us. I'll close the shop up, we can leave the cars in town and get a cab home."

The three left a few minutes later and walked to the hotel. Being out of season the place was quiet. In the bar, Sarah was welcomed by Frances, a small man who could have been anywhere between thirty and fifty.

"Miss Sarah, ladies, welcome. I have a corner just for you."

They were led to the far end of the room where they they sat.

"Sarah, this is lovely. Are you sure there won't be a problem?" Jill looked quickly at Tammy.

"Jill, leave this with me. I don't know about you, but I'm hungry and could do with a sandwich."

They agreed to order sandwiches and called Frances over.

"Frances dear, a bottle of a good white Bordeaux, three glasses and a selection of your sandwiches, chef's choice. Could we have some chilled water as well please."

"Certainly."

He left and returned a minute later with the wine, opening it at the table and pouring three glasses. He was back a few minutes later with a jug of iced water and three water glasses.

While they waited for the sandwiches, Tammy was interrogated again by Jill, who was still uncertain if Tammy would keep the role. Thankfully, the wine was easing the conversation and they were finishing their first glasses as the sandwiches arrived. Conversation was brief for the next fifteen minutes whilst they ate, Frances brought some lemon finger wipes for the three girls before clearing away the plates.

Sarah excused herself to go to the ladies room, Jill took that opportunity to ask Tammy some direct questions.

"Tammy, has Sarah forced you in any way?"

"Not really, mostly she's been more than helpful, it's just that this weekend has been madness. I love my hair but I wasn't asked first, I'm also worried that too many people have been told that I'm her niece, and that I'm only sixteen. However, I do love the idea of being on the stage as Anita but again I wasn't asked."

"That may have been my fault, I knew you'd be our Anita after seeing you a week ago in the shop. I told Sarah and you know the rest."

"So, do you still want me?"

"Tammy, yes I do. Regardless of your dual-identity, you are still the best Anita I've seen. You also passed the audition heads and shoulders above the others, but I won't pressure you to stay if you don't want to."

Sarah rejoined them and asked, "so, Jill, where does that leave us?"

Jill picked up her glass and sipped, the other two did the same. "Tammy, I think it's best for you to remain as Tammy, if that's what you want, but you should limit your appearances in town. In the meantime, learn Anita's part. Do you have a copy of the music and script?"

"Yes to the music, it's on my laptop and it'll be on Youtube, but no to the script."

"I'll email you the script. I want you to come to the theatre on Wednesday and Friday evenings at 7 and then come to see me on Thursday morning at ten.

"Where?"

"Sorry, around here everyone knows everyone else so I usually don't have to say. I'm a consultant at Dunbar Hospital, ask for Dr Davison's clinic."

Tammy sat there wondering where this was going. As Sarah had returned from the toilet, Jill took her turn. It seemed clear that neither was going to leave Tammy alone at this time.

"Tammy, did Jill explain what her job was?"

"Only that she's a consultant at The Dunbar."

"Right, I'll tell you more when you get home." Sarah called Frances over and asked him to arrange a taxi and then asked for the bill. Tammy suddenly realised she needed the toilet and made her way, following the signs, almost taking the wrong door; this was her first time in the ladies loo anywhere.

Sarah had settled the bill and they were waiting for Tammy when she re-appeared just as the taxi was just pulling up outside. Some fiften minutes later they arrived back at Sarah's house, having stopped at the shop to retrieve Tammy's shopping.

They sat there giggling as they looked at Tammy's purchases. Some of the clothes simply didn't suit, or fit, Tammy. Unfortunately, she'd been too scared to use the changing rooms. They hadn't gone food shopping, as had been Sarah's original plan, so they ordered a take-away curry, not finishing every container so some went into the fridge.

Sarah sent Tammy to the shower before it got late and made certain that Tammy's hair was dry before she went up to bed. Both forgot about Tammy's appointment with Jill, and Tammy was none the wiser.

Tamara's Début   Part Three   by Shiraz

 
Tuesday 18th November
 
 
Tammy woke at eight and walked into the kitchen bleary eyed. Sarah put a coffee in front of Tammy and sat with her at the kitchen table.

"Tammy, I've had your mother on the phone. She wants you to send her an email when you switch your laptop on just to let her know how you are. You'll need my wireless password obviously."

Sarah handed over a small printed card then continued, "She's sending me some money to take care of you, in fact it is rather more than I reckon I might need. I suggest you follow Jill's advice and stay here, do you have some coursework to do?"

"Yes, I was working on a report on Friday afternoon and have a long-term project that needs some attention."

"Right, I have to go in a minute, I'll go to the supermarket on my way home. If you really need to go out, there's a spare key on the hook over there, but please text me when you go out and when you get back."

"Is that necessary?"

"I gave your mother an assurance I wouldn't let anything happen to you. If you're staying with me, then you have to abide by my rules. They're only for your safety, not to keep tabs on you."

"Okay."

"I'll be off then, have a good day and don't lounge around in your nightie all day. Oh, you'll need something nice for Saturday." Sarah gave Tammy a kiss and went on her way.

Tammy wondered if she had indigestion after last night's curry so simply had some toast for breakfast, washed down with some black coffee. She then went up and, having washed and applied some light make-up, dressed in a tartan mini-skirt and long-sleeved top.

Tammy switched on her laptop only to find the battery had less than 30 minutes remaining. It took her almost that long to find the power supply, but in the meantime she also found her phone charger and a few other necessary bits and pieces.

Once powered, she first connected to Sarah's router and logged into her bank account. The damage to the current account was very visible, although there were a few items to be returned to the stores. Tammy now had just over £50 remaining credit, it was simply not enough. She accessed a second account and transferred £2000 to her current account.

Next, she went to both Tom's Ebay and Amazon accounts to edit her personal details and add Sarah's address. Of course, Sarah hadn't actually told Tammy what her home address was but, as is common with those living on their own, a utility bill was laying on the kitchen worktop.

Before ordering anything, she checked Tom's emails. There was one from the school asking to be kept up to date with contact details and one from Tom's mum.

"Tom, dearest. You know you can always call me if you need something. If my phone's off, leave a message. I'll try to check my emails at breakfast daily if I'm not busy. Can you tell me something about this play? Lots of love, mum."

Tammy looked at the words and was tempted to say something sarcastic but thought a direct approach might work with mother. Then again, maybe not.

Tammy wrote

"Mum, money is okay, will email or call if I need anything. Play is West Side Story, I get my script later. Love, Tom."

Tammy knew it wasn't the whole truth, but mum was difficult to deal with at anything except a superficial level. Her dad was somewhat different, she emailed him next.

"Dad, can you call me later today? I might need another bank account. Will explain. Tom."

She recalled that the Constable had said no fake ID, right? How about legal aliases?

Tammy went into Ebay and did some shopping, gaining several pairs of shoes, boots and winter-wear. Thinking back to Sarah's comment at breakfast, what was she doing on Saturday? Tammy added a few bits of decent lingerie in white, red and black, just in case.

All this effort only took Tammy until 11am when she took a coffee break. Her phone decided to ring as she was making her coffee, no number was shown.

"Hello?"

"Hello Tom, my secretary has read me your email. What's the problem?"

That's the difference between mum and dad.

"Dad, have you got ten minutes?"

"Yes, just give me a moment." Tom heard is father shout a few words across a room then heard a door close.

"Right Tom, we won't be disturbed. Fire away."

Tom told his father about his work with Sarah, the play, how he'd been picked because of his voice. He then explained the problem with his hair, the school's enforced closure and that he was expected to go to the theatre for rehearsals as Tammy, not Tommy. Going back to school, when the kitchens re-opened, was another problem entirely.

"Tom, I know you're pretty good at sorting yourself out so what's really gone wrong?"

"Dad, Sarah made up this story that I was her 16 year old niece so I was interviewed by the Caithness Police Truancy Officer who'd seen me in Thurso. Even the copper had trouble believing who I really was. This little story is getting out of hand."

"So you are coping with living as a girl?"

"That's the easy part, ironically."

"That doesn't surprise me. Remember, I went to St Andrews as well and we had the usual problem when we put on school plays, no females. I once spent a month when I was 15 as a girl in order to get into character and learn the part. Bloody good fun, it makes a man out of you."

"I suppose it does, but you weren't walking around Thurso town centre, were you? I mean, doing it in the school is one thing but ...."

"Sorry Tom, I shouldn't have made light of it. Right, this is what we are going to do; we are going to level with the school, we might need their help later."

"The head's wife has already met Tammy, I don't think she saw through my disguise."

"That should make for an interesting discussion and it helps us. They could hardly disgrace the head's wife could they?"

"I suppose not. What else are we going to do about Tammy?"

"She has to be 18, not 16, so stop Mrs Bonney saying otherwise, she started that one."

"Right, what else?"

"How long before the play?"

"Four or five weeks, why?"

"You'll need to buy things for Tammy?"

"Yes?"

"Then you should have a card with Tammy's name, except it will be Miss Tamara Smart. I'll need an up to date photo today by email, I'll get you a duplicate card for your account. By the way, yesterday's purchases knocked your balance somewhat, have you moved some money across?"

"Yes, thank you, but how?"

"How do I know about the account or how am I going to do this?"

"Both?"

"Firstly, can you remember who gave you the login for your account? Secondly, I don't know but we employ lawyers and senior bankers to sort out each other's expense accounts and contracts, I'm sure they can do some real work for a change. "

"Right."

"Send me that photo, right?"

"Yes Dad."

"Also email Sarah Bonney's full details, including the business address. Do you know who she banks with?"

"Yes Dad." Tammy had seen the business cheque book.

"Tammy?"

"Yes Dad?"

"Just checking."

Tammy was smiling when she finally took the phone from her ear. She looked at the battery indicator, which was flashing, and plugged her phone in.

Owing to her light breakfast Tammy was now hungry, her indigestion was no longer evident. A quick look in the fridge found some smoked mackerel, a few salad leaves and the remains of a mild curried vegetable dish.

Tammy finished her lunch then went looking for the mouthwash. Whilst in the bathroom she tidied her make-up then went to the guest room and located her camera.

Tammy hadn't thought she'd need her tripod so used the dressing table as a perch. She set the self timer and sat on the bed. The first shot was too wide, the second and third were askew. Finally the fourth was okay. She uploaded the decent image into the laptop and edited it down to a reasonable file size before sending it. She included as many of the other details he'd asked for that she could recall.

Job done, Tammy gathered up the clothing that had been rejected, together with the receipts, and got herself ready for the town. She looked at her bare legs and put a pair of opaque tights on under her little skirt.

Her phone now had a little more charge in it so she sent Sarah a text to say she was on the way to the store, via the shops. Tammy picked up the spare key and locked the door behind her.

It was cool outside, but thankfully dry. After seven years at the school, Tammy knew the roads, just not the road names. She'd ran around the town whilst orienteering in previous years, in the winter cross-country running was not advisable for the younger pupils. Twenty five minutes later, using the lanes, she was back in the town centre.

The first thing, seeing as it was still officially lunchtime and many local shops were closed, was to take a seat in the Castletown Hotel's bar for a coffee. In there she found Sandy, the hairdresser, who immediately beckoned Tammy over.

They talked small talk about the town, the weather and the weekend's forthcoming wedding. The latter was news to Tammy. Even when told the names of the pair getting married, she was no better off. Of course, since Sandy was doing the bride's hair, she knew everything. Sandy went off at 1.45 to her salon, Tammy used the toilet and headed back towards the High St.

An hour later Tammy had exchanged or returned the rejected clothes and now carried two new bags. She arrived at Sarah's shop at three, the shop was empty and Sarah was not in a good mood.

"I had your father on the phone."

"I suspected he might, just not so soon."

"You could have warned me."

"I only ever have a 50-50 chance of getting hold of him myself, so I couldn't have known for sure."

"That's not what I said. Anyway, he seems to know alot about you, Tammy."

"I told him almost everything."

"Almost?"

"He thinks my dressing as a girl started with the play."

"I'm not so sure."

"Oh, never mind."

"Never mind?"

"Yes, he doesn't shock easily. He's sorting out some things for me."

"You never told me what he did, only that he was in international business."

"I never saw the point."

"Tammy, he's on the board of a bank!"

"Yes."

"My bank!"

"Yes."

"I need to sit down." Sarah put the 15 minute sign up and locked the shop door. The pair retreated to the store room and made a coffee. There were a few minutes of silence until both had sipped at their mugs.

"Tammy, he's looked at my cash-flow and seen that I am not doing so well. I've told you before that it wasn't good, well it's worse than that. I won't survive beyond Christmas at this rate. It might even have been sooner than that but you were bringing trade to the shop, the older ladies loved to talk to you and spent money here instead of elsewhere in town. The problem was that my trade is down so I'm making less money than last year, whilst rent and electricity cost more. It's not a good business model."

"No, not good, obviously."

"Do you know what he wants to do?"

"I'm not good at guesses like this."

"He wants to buy the business, for you."

"For me?"

"For Tammy."

"Not Tom?"

"No."

"What's he up to?"

"I don't know. But he knows if I don't take the offer, I won't survive. At least I don't have a mortgage on the house so don't have to worry about that."

"What are you going to do?"

"I don't know yet. I think you need to talk to your father."

"That sounds sensible. Look, it's now getting dark out there and there's hardly anyone in the street. Let's close early and go shopping. We could do with eating indoors but your fridge is empty."

"Good idea., just one thing - I normally don't open until ten so I can give myself a chance to sort things out, I'd like to open at nine if you're with me and see if that brings in extra business, starting tomorrow."

"That does sound like a good idea, let's put a notice in the window."

With the shop locked, Sarah recovered her car from where it had been parked 24 hours earlier and they headed to the supermarket. They finally left almost an hour later with a full trolley. Tammy had paid for the shopping, perhaps feeling a little bit guilty for what her father had said.

Back in the house they busied themselves with preparing dinner. Rather than touch on the main topic, Tammy asked about the conversation she'd had with Sandy that lunchtime.

"Of course I know about the wedding, I'm dressing the bride's mother."

"When is it?"

"It's at three on Saturday afternoon at the Registry Office in Davidson's Lane, it's not far so we can walk there, I'll close the shop early."

"Us?"

"Yes, you're invited as well."

"But I've nothing to wear."

"I've sorted that out, your dress arrived today, it's hanging in the storeroom."

"But I won't know anyone."

"Yes you will, the bride's mother is Elsie who you met yesterday. She came back to the shop today and said the bridesmaids had both called to say they were stuck in London and couldn't promise to be there. This qualified as an emergency in Elsie's view and she had no other family to call upon. There will be other people at the wedding who you've met, as well."

"So?"

"So Elsie wants you to be the bridesmaid, she was completely smitten with you."

"I can't do that!"

"Yes you can, and I know Andrea and Alison will be happy for you to take their places."

"But what about the bride and groom?"

"Elsie is arranging the wedding so they don't get a say, but Catherine and David will love you to be there. They've seen a photo that was taken on Saturday at the theatre."

"I didn't know anyone was taking photos."

"Neither did I until earlier today."

The pair sat and ate, wondering who would broach the subject first. Tammy picked up her laptop in an effort to look busy and checked her emails.

There were a couple of emails from Ebay confirming despatch of her orders, as well as the usual selection of advertising emails from retailers and a bit of spam. In the middle of deleting those, a new email dropped in from her father.

"Hi Tammy, Spoke to Sarah, presume she's with you now. You can collect your new card from the bank branch in the town centre at lunchtime. There will be a legal document with it, sign it and get a couple of copies. I will need the original so make sure it gets back to me. The PIN for your new card will be the same. If you've changed your mind about this phone me straight away, I've pulled a few favours to get this done quickly. I've also left a message for the head teacher to call me. Speak tomorrow. Dad."

Tammy smiled, this was her father's usual brief style but there was warmth regardless. She read the whole email to Sarah.

"But why did he have to interfere with my business? He had no right."

"He felt he had a right, after all you are looking after his only child. But he hasn't done anything yet, just looked at the numbers and made you an offer." Tammy let the silence hang for a few seconds then asked the obvious question, "so, are you going to accept it?"

"I don't know. What do you think?"

"You haven't told me how much he's offered."

"No, and right now I'm not really sure I want to."

"That's fine, it's your business, in both senses."

"Your father wants it to be your's. How much are you worth?"

"I don't know, my accountant never told me, and I never asked!"

They both had a bout of the giggles, then hugged.

"You have a good father, Tammy"

"I know, I just wish I could see him more often."

"I get the feeling he's there when you need him."

"Yeah."

The rest of the evening was filled with conversation and a little genuine humour. At 8.30 Tammy went for her shower and slid into bed after drying her hair.

She switched her laptop back on and went back to her emails, sending a short reply to her father, reminding him that she'd be at the theatre from 6.30pm for rehearsal. Tammy then remembered that she'd not received the script from Jill, did Jill have her email address? Tammy hopped out of bed, and found Sarah in her room.

"Jill said she'd send me the script but she didn't ask for my email address, do you have hers?"

"Tammy, I'll find it in the morning, it's been a long day, I'm not firing up the computer now."

Tammy shuffled back to her room and shut down her laptop, plugging the power in to recharge the battery. She climbed into bed and was asleep within minutes.
 
 
Wednesday 19th November
 
Tammy was woken at seven and told to get moving. They were out of the door by eight but Tammy still wasn't sure why they had to be out so early, she'd grabbed her fully-charged laptop and mobile broadband usb stick just in case she got bored.

They reached the shop at 8.15, having got stuck behind several school buses in the narrow streets. Sarah cursed, she'd clean forgotten about the buses and should have taken the other route.

Tammy sensed that it wasn't a good idea to go to the shop with Sarah after she'd parked so took a slow walk to the bakery for some cakes, picking up a cheese and onion French roll for each of them as well as their mid-morning pastries.

Fifteen minutes had passed when Tammy reached the shop and tapped on the glass to be let in. The store didn't open until nine and Sarah was not prepared to have any early callers, she did at least have the kettle ready to make coffee.

"You took your time."

"There was a queue, and I had them make us some lunch."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you. I didn't sleep well, because of yesterday."

"Look, if you want to get out and work things out then I'll look after the shop."

"That would be useful. Wait until we open then I'll go and call on a few people."

While they sat and drank their coffees, Sarah pointed at a burgundy off-the-shoulder dress that was hanging a few feet away.

"When I get back I want you to try that on. You'll need a red strapless bra with that, do you have one?"

"No, but I ordered a red lingerie set yesterday morning. The bra was multiway according to the website. I paid for express delivery."

"It could be here this afternoon, more likely tomorrow."

They chatted a bit more, Sarah left just after nine, having made sure the cash float was adequate. She picked up a bag from the safe and dropped it into her bag, her first stop was the bank.

Tammy setup her laptop on the counter and checked her emails but there was nothing new. She realised that she'd forgotten to ask Sarah for Jill's email address so, once again, couldn't learn the script.

There were only a handful of customers before eleven, none of whom Tammy had seen before, but they all seemed to know her name. Tammy cleared £200 in sales during that time.

By eleven thirty she was thirsty so put the kettle on, she was out the back when the bell rang on the shop door. Putting her head around the corner she saw Sarah come in, slamming the door as she did. Tammy did her best to deflate the situation.

"I'm just making a coffee, do you want one?"

"Bloody bankers."

"Pardon?"

"They've pulled the plug on me."

"Why have they done that?"

"It seems your father's little enquiry caused them to have another look at my accounts, they deny all knowledge of course. I have until next week to clear my overdraft."

"How much?"

"Ten grand."

"That much?"

"Yes. When you speak to your father thank him, won't you. I'm afraid you will have to fly to Geneva after all so you can thank him in person."

"Look, leave this with me, I need to go to the bank myself. Sit down so you can have a coffee and your cake. By the way, I took £200 this morning."

"Two hundred? Any other day I'd be grateful for that much, especially midweek, but it doesn't seem like much right now. You can try the dress on when you get back, if I don't send it back. I close at one on a Wednesday."

"I'll be back in an hour." Tammy walked out with her bag over her shoulder.

She went straight to the bank and spoke to a customer advisor who was sat, bored, near the entrance. He was pretending not to notice that Tammy was stood there, she waited patiently for a minute before speaking.

"I believe there is a package for me."

"We only open children's accounts on Saturdays."

"I believe you misheard me, there is a package for me," she examined the name tag, "Jeremy".

"I'll check, but I hope you're not wasting my time."

"You haven't asked my name yet, so how could you check?"

"Well?"

"Tamara Smart."

"Right Miss Smart, if you'd like to wait a minute. Please wait there." He pointed at some seating then picked up his phone and called the back office. After being transferred around a few people, he announced, "there is a package for you, for some reason it's with the branch manager. Could you come with me."

She was led to a security door and into a corridor. They stopped outside the Branch Manager's door, Jeremy left her there and wandered, still bored, back to his perch in the lobby.

She knocked and was admitted after a few seconds.

"Good morning Miss Smart. I'd be grateful if you could tell me what's going on."

"I'm here this morning to collect my new card and to sign a legal document."

"I was told I couldn't open this envelope until you arrived and I had to have my assistant manager present as a witness. This package was delivered by courier half an hour ago, it is not normal practice for customer accounts, it is most definitely not normal for a school girl."

"I'm sure you're a busy man, Mr Doherty, in a very busy branch," the moment seemed to be right for a little sarcasm, "but doesn't this bank have a customers' charter?"

"How very droll Miss Smart." He picked up his phone and summonsed his deputy. The manager opened the package in front of Tammy and the assistant manager, there was a covering letter, an official document, a small sealed envelope and a bank card in its' own envelope. The manager was less than happy that this should be taking up his time, and deskspace.

"The letter asks that I read the instructions out loud."

Tamara nodded, guessing much of the letter's content, and style.

"Dear Mr Doherty, you should have, in your presence, Miss Tamara Smart. Her photo is printed on the reverse of the debit card however I do ask that you establish positive identification first."

"Why can't one of my staff handle this?"

"Mr Doherty, the letter?"

"Enclosed is a document that Miss Smart needs to sign. She should be able to produce a staff identity card in the name of Tom Smart."

"Miss, I don't like cloak and dagger games, do you have this Mr Smart's ID card?"

"Yes, Mr Doherty." She handed the card which described Tom as a junior in the international division of the bank.

"I don't know how you got this, is it your older brother's?"

"No, please continue."

"Please do not ask Miss Smart about the origins of the card she has handed you. I can assure you it is authentic and the reasons will become clear shortly. She now needs to sign the attached legal document, witnessed by you both. I require the original be returned to my office and Miss Smart is to take four copies. You should also retain one copy at the branch."

"This document says that 'until further notice, Mr Tom Smart will also be known as Miss Tamara Smart.' What is this?"

Tammy answered, "this, Mr Doherty, is a document drawn up by the bank's own solicitors in London. You do not need to know the exact reasoning. Please pass it here." Tammy signed the document, signing as Tamara then passed it to the manager who in turn passed it to the assistant. The assistant scurried out of the room holding the document.

"You will now ask Miss Smart to sign the debit card in your presence, you will also return Mr Smart's bank ID. Open the small envelope and hand the contents to Miss Smart. There is a receipt slip enclosed. You should then act on any reasonable instructions from Miss Smart, any queries should be directed to myself."

The manager did as asked and tore open the little envelope. A bank ID pass bearing Tammy's name and photo was inside. Her job title was now 'Assistant to International Director'. The card gave her right of entry into any branch as well as the HQ buildings.

"Mr Doherty, could you please finish the letter."

"I would remind you that any documents you have seen today are confidential and that the party involved is an employee of the bank. Disciplinary proceedings will be started if any information about this letter, the documents or Miss Smart is disclosed. I would also remind you that as my assistant, Miss Smart has privileged access to bank records. Yours, Richard Smart."

"Your father?"

"Yes."

"Why all this kerfuffle?"

"He is a stickler for proper procedure, particularly where there is a sensitive subject."

"I see. Now, I get the feeling you want to discuss something."

"Yes, I understand a Mrs Sarah Bonney visited the branch to deposit some money and was not given a good reception."

"You know I can't discuss customer's accounts."

"Yes you can, Mr Doherty. Didn't the letter ask that you act on any instruction, and didn't it also state that I am an employee of the bank?"

"Yes, but I'm not comfortable with this."

"That's fine, I'll call my father."

"Is that necessary?"

"It is if you won't confirm certain details to me."

"Okay, what are you looking to confirm?" He accessed Sarah's business account on his terminal.

"Her overdraft is £10,000? What is the current balance?"

"£8,850 overdrawn."

"And you are calling in the overdraft?"

"Yes, she has seven days."

"On what grounds?"

"We applied our standard risk assessment for small businesses."

"Did you see her yourself?"

"No, my assistant did, he handles business accounts."

"How long could you have given Mrs Bonney to repay the overdraft, even assuming that the risk assessment was valid?"

"We could have waited twelve weeks, but normal practice is eight weeks for sole-trader businesses. Given the economic situation and the business' recent poor performance it's clear we decided to give her a much shorter timescale, although there aren't many notes on the system."

"So, by giving her one week you are obviously intent on seeing her business fail, however if you allowed her eight weeks, that would move the deadline past Christmas and through the busiest time of the year for her business? I would suggest you do exactly that. You should write to her and have that letter dropped by hand into her shop this afternoon as your actions have left her very distressed. I would also suggest you take more than a cursory look at her business' performance, particularly at the period including December last year and January this year."

The Assistant Manager had walked back into the room as Tammy was saying this.

"Who are you to suggest this?" He hadn't been in the room when it had been established who Tammy was. Tammy reached for the ID card in front of her and hung it around her neck. The manager answered before Tammy did.

"Miss Smart is an employee with the authority of one of the directors. You will act on her suggestion. Please hand Miss Smart her copies. Miss Smart, if we're finished?"

"Thank you Mr Doherty." Tammy left the room as the manager made certain his assistant knew what was expected. She folded the copies into her bag.

Tammy used her swipe card to exit the office suite and return to the lobby. Jeremy was sat bored as she walked past him.

"Miss, did you get your account sorted?"

Tammy stopped and turned to him, her bank ID on display.

"Certainly Jeremy, by the way I won't need a new kiddies account seeing that I'm on the payroll here but if I hear you refer to any other customer like that you will need a new job. Understand?"

"Yes, Miss Smart."

Tammy used the ATM inside the branch, inserting her new debit card to get some cash, checking her existing PIN did indeed work.

She smiled as she walked back onto the street outside the branch, having remembered to remove her bank ID. She walked back towards Sarah's shop but bumped into PC St James on the corner of the High St.

"Good afternoon Constable."

"Good afternoon, er, Miss Smart."

"Could I have a word? Perhaps a coffee over there?" She pointed at a small café."

"I'm due a break so that's fine."

They ordered their drinks and sat in a quiet corner.

"Constable, I recall that you said I should not get any fake ID."

"I did."

"I took your advice and now have that organised. Here's a declaration from my father's solicitor, duly witnessed."

"What? Oh, you have legally adopted this identity. Is this valid under Scottish law? I see that it was issued in London."

They paused while their drinks were delivered.

"If my father's solicitors have drawn this up then I think we can be satisfied that this is valid. I also now have a debit card in this name. My photo is on the rear in case of query," She held up the card. "I'm also an employee of the bank just up the road." She showed him the bank ID then put that and the other items in her bag.

"You didn't have those on Monday."

"No, but it only took a day to organise it through proper, legal, channels. Mrs Bonney is going to ensure everyone knows I'm really 18 years old, as she started that rumour. I hope you're satisfied that there is nothing untoward going on."

"It remains very strange, to be sure, but I can accept what you're saying. You're a very confident young, er, lady, Miss Smart."

"Thank you officer. I hope this has cleared up any issues you may have thought you had."

She got up and paid for the drinks, then headed back into the nearby stores looking at winter clothing. Short skirts, with or without tights, were not recommended for the Highlands during the colder months.

Tammy finally arriving back at Sarah's shop well after twelve thirty.

Tamara's Début   Part Four   by Shiraz

 
Wednesday 19th November Continued
 
Tammy pushed the shop door open and found Sarah looking stunned, thankfully the shop was otherwise deserted although Tammy got the feeling that it hadn't been a busy late morning for Sarah. As Tammy approached she could see tears in Sarah's eyes, Sarah dropped a letter on the counter and wrapped her arms around Tammy.

"I don't know what you did, but thank you. You've allowed me to think beyond the next few days."

"What's in the letter?"

"They've given me eight weeks and stopped my interest payments. They've also said that if I reduce my overdraft by £2000 then they'll reconsider."

"That's great. How did it arrive?"

"It turned up just before you got back, delivered by the same man at the bank who had hauled me into his office. He wasn't happy when he came in so just handed me the envelope and went out, without saying a word."

"All we need to do now is get you the trade you need."

"Yes, but I've been trying to do that for a while and it's never as easy as it sounds. Last Saturday has been by far my busiest day for several months, but I need to get business from those customers who only browse during the week and don't spend."

"If I have helped with the Saturdays then maybe I can help with that as well."

"Yes." Sarah dried her eyes then looked straight at Tammy. "Can you tell me what you did, or is that a secret?"

"I simply spoke directly to the manager and explained that I'm an employee of the bank, he worked out for himself that my dad is a director."

"You're what?"

"I have done work experience at the bank, with Dad. He made me a full member of staff, but I only get paid when I'm working, the rest of the time I'm being sponsored by the bank, that covers my school fees and will include my future university fees."

"You never mentioned any of this."

"I haven't ever needed to use this before, but rank has it's privileges, as they say."

"I'd say, although I've never really approved of that system. Never mind, in this case it's in my favour."

"You're welcome. I did it because you're more than a friend."

"So, did you go there just for me?"

"No. Dad has organised a new debit card for me and I'm now also officially known as Tamara Smart, I have a solicitor's letter that makes it legal."

"Is that everything?"

"Yes, look, you close in quarter of an hour, how about I try on that dress?"

Sarah sent Tammy into one of the changing rooms to strip off down to her underwear, the dress was hanging there ready. She climbed into the dress and tried to pull it up, but couldn't find the fastener.

"Sarah, can you help me?"

Sarah, now with repaired make-up, found a hidden zip up one side and engaged the hook at the top of the zipper after pulling the dress right up. Tammy's white bra straps were very obvious.

"Tammy, the colour's good on you but that bra spoils the effect!"

"I know. As I said I've ordered some lingerie sets on Ebay. The sets were in white, red and black, it said on the website that each of the bras was multiway. Will the red set be alright?"

"Yes, that'll be fine, but if they don't turn up by tomorrow afternoon we'll have to look in town, I haven't the time to take you anywhere."

"If necessary I'll take the bus to Wick and look there."

"Okay, now get changed back."

Ten minutes later Tammy and Sarah were sat eating their lunch when there was a knock on the now-locked shop door. Sarah saw Jill stood there and let her in.

"Hello, I think I owe you an apology, Tammy, I didn't take your email address, did I?"

"No, and I haven't had a chance to phone you, as I don't have your number."

The two of them had a giggle then exchanged details, Jill handed Tammy a business card. Tammy looked at Jill's job title.

"Oh."

"Didn't you know?"

"No."

"That's fine, you know now. Like I said on Monday, everyone in town knows my name and my clinic."

"Yes, but I still wasn't expecting that you'd be a shrink!"

"No, I'm not a shrink, a consultant psychologist with a sideline in psychiatry."

"As I said, a shrink."

"Have it your way, I actually came here to give you a copy of the script so you could have a read through before tonight, not to discuss my doctorates."

"Yes, I'm sorry. It's been an interesting couple of days."

"I'd ask you to talk about it but I'm due back at the hospital and we have an appointment for tomorrow in any case. Bye for now Tammy, bye Sarah."

Sarah had finished her cheese roll, Tammy now did the same as Sarah locked the shop door behind Jill.

"Tammy, I forgot. Your father phoned."

"What did he say?"

"He asked how you were coping but he also said to me, very directly, that I must stop referring to you as my niece and that anyone who asks must be told you are 18. Also, you are to be known as Tamara Smart, not Bonney. Now, how are we going to deal with that?"

"We are going to say that you've always been like an aunt to me, even though we're not related. That will explain the niece element, of course some people may have assumed my surname was Bonney but you didn't like to correct anyone, particularly as it apparently wasn't doing any harm. Most of them will forget that it was you who told them it was Bonney.

"So far as me being sixteen, again that was because some might not believe I was older than that, of course now that I'm old enough to buy & drink alcohol or watch 18 rated movies it would be a problem for me, height or otherwise. You could add, if anyone argues, that you can be a little eccentric, particularly after your husband left."

"I reckon a few do believe I'm eccentric, only they don't say it to my face. Your father said you'd work out a solution. He thinks alot of you."

"I know, I just don't hear it as often as I would like from him. My mother is a completely different story."

"Let's get back home and relax, you have to be back at the theatre in a few hours."

They left shortly after and made it back home without incident. Tammy settled, curled on her bed, holding her script.

She was surprisingly aware of the storyline, despite reckoning that she'd never seen it before. Maybe it was one of those times where you switch on the TV ten minutes after a programme has started, but never look up the name of the show in the guides.

At five there was a shout, reminding Tammy that she had to be at the theatre at half six, they therefore had to eat soon. Fortunately, whilst Tammy had been upstairs, Sarah had made an old fashioned stew, just right for beating the cold air. Tammy wasn't sure if she should would be able to do any dancing at the rehearsal, after finishing her plate.

Sarah dropped Tammy off at the theatre and into the custody of the musical director, Sandy Franklin.

"Nice to see you again Tamara."

"Actually I prefer Tammy,"

"Oh, let's get a song done. I want to hear you again. Have you tried any of the songs since Saturday?"

They spent 30 minutes trying the songs until Tammy and the piano agreed about the tune.

The director then needed Tammy to meet the rest of the cast. Tammy was a little surprised to see John Hibbert there. Otherwise the actors were all locals whom Tammy barely knew. They sat on the stage in a ring and did a walk through the script. It was obvious that some would struggle to make it to opening night but the director, Iain Brown, was kind enough to let the many errors pass by. How long that attitude would hold was another story.

"Everyone, that's enough for tonight but please make sure you take a copy of your script with you, and practice! We meet again here on Friday at the same time. Tammy, could you hang around please?"

The rest of the cast, including John Hibbert, filtered out of the theatre and Tammy was left alone with the director.

"Mr Brown, I need to get home. I've sent Sarah a text to collect me."

"I won't keep you long Tammy, and please call me Iain. It's just that as you're sixteen I need permission from your parent or guardian."

"Iain, I'm eighteen. Sarah can be a little eccentric at times and likes to think of me as a sweet sixteen year old."

"I hope you're not telling me this just to avoid the parental permission."

"Not at all, can you wait a minute?" Tammy retrieved her bag and coat from a hook and returned to the director.

"Here's my work identity card with my name and date of birth under the photo. Is that sufficient?"

"Yes, but I thought you were still at school?"

"I'm just finishing my A levels but the bank sponsors me."

He took a closer look at the card, "it says you are an assistant to the international director."

"Yes, my father, he's in Geneva right now which is why I'm staying with Sarah."

"I hope he comes to the opening night."

"So do I."

Tammy saw Sarah enter the theatre and wave, Tammy said goodbye to Iain and hurried out into the cold. She was very pleased to be back indoors some ten minutes later, the time was now almost nine o'clock. Tammy went for a shower, trying not to get her hair wet then got ready for bed. Her hair, despite best efforts, was a little damp but Tammy did not want to blow dry it because of the noise.

She walked downstairs to make a hot chocolate and took it up to her room, switching on her laptop then propping herself up. There was one from her father asking how her day was. She typed a short reply.

"Hi dad. Picked up the new cards at lunchtime, thanks very much. Think I could have taken a better photo but you didn't give me much time to get it perfected!
 
Hopefully the document will be back with you tomorrow, but what do we tell mum? On other matters the bank had called in Sarah's overdraft, she thinks it was you who set them off. They gave her a week, I've persuaded them to give 8 weeks and suggested they reconsider. The assistant manager is not happy, the manager is a bit better. What's this about me owning the business?
 
Was at the theatre tonight for a walk through. Back there on Friday evening. Have you spoken to the school? Going to a wedding on Saturday.
 
Lots of love, Tammy."

No point in saying she's a bridesmaid, yet.

No other emails of note, and definitely nothing further from mum.

Tammy took her empty mug back to the kitchen before sliding into bed.
 
 
Thursday 20th November
 
Her alarm went off at seven the following morning, Tammy was a little surprised as she hadn't brought an alarm with her. She shut it off and was stretching when Sarah appeared.

"The alarm worked then?"

"Oh, I did wonder."

"Get yourself washed and downstairs, we'll have a decent breakfast this morning. There's snow forecast for later."

They finished off some porridge, bacon and eggs before heading into town. This time Sarah remembered to use the route that took them onto the A9 briefly before their turning onto Olrig Street.

Once again, while Sarah unlocked the shop, Tammy went for the usual mid morning cakes. Once back at the shop they sat for a coffee before any customers arrived.

"Tammy, have you forgotten your appointment this morning?"

"Err, appointment?"

"Yes, with Dr Davison."

"Jill?"

"Yes, silly."

"No, it's at ten at the hospital."

"Hmm, don't you have a diary?"

"It's at the school."

"Well, nip along to the stationers when they open and find a nice diary. Don't forget you need twenty minutes to get to the hospital."

"I'll allow 30 minutes, in the past ten years I've not needed to go to the hospital once and won't know where to go in the building."

"Just look like a lost young lady and they'll be clamouring to help you."

"Thanks."

"Seriously, you will have to watch out for any unwanted attention while you're there. Girls have it harder than boys, believe me, that's why I want you to let me know where you are."

"I'll accept that, it's just I've never had to think about it before."

"No, as a boy you wouldn't have."

Tammmy finished her coffee as Sarah unlocked the shop door at nine. Unusually there were several customers within the first few minutes and Tammy was fully engaged with taking their money, several of the ladies already seemed to know that she was going to be a bridesmaid. Tammy didn't want to be drawn into conversation so she was polite but explained she had someone else waiting to be served or work to do, it seemed to work.

At 9.30am Sarah reminded Tammy about the appointment, causing her to grab her jacket and sped out the door. Sarah explained to a few enquiring customers that Tammy had an unspecified meeting but would be back after lunch.

Tammy, of course, had forgotten about her purchase of a new diary in the rush to get out. The walk to the hospital only took fifteen minutes, plus another five to find the small waiting area for Jill's clinic. Of course, she was recorded as Tamara Bonney, as Jill knew no different yet. Tammy sat not knowing what lay ahead and was shocked back into full attention when Jill approached.

"Good morning Tammy, please come with me."

Jill led her to a small room with some soft furnishings and a coffee table., a coffee filter machine was gurgling in one corner. Otherwise, Tammy noted that the blinds were drawn but the interior lighting was soft; plainly aiming for a relaxed but private environment. Jill pointed at a seat while she went to get the coffee, she poured a cup each without asking Tammy how she took it.

"Tammy, I hope that's the way you like your coffee. Forgive me, I should have asked first."

"It's fine Jill, thank you."

"Tammy, how about you bring me up to speed?"

Tammy explained the conversations with her father and the meeting at the bank. She omitted the business arrangements concerning Sarah, however.

"Did you bring the solicitor's letter with you?"

Tammy nodded and pulled a copy out of her bag.

"Can I keep this one?" Another nod. "Oh, thank you. I see it's a simple statutory declaration but without revoking your original name. Very neat. You said you've already got documents in this name."

"Yes, this is my bank identity card and this is my new debit card."

"Thank you, now how is the play going?"

"It's pretty good. We did a walk through after I practised the songs again."

"Iain said you corrected your name and showed the identity card."

"Yes, I didn't think the solicitor's letter was a good idea."

"I'd agree. Too much information would be dangerous to control right now. You haven't however kept a low profile, have you?"

"No, except for Tuesday morning, but I had to get things done. I've sorted out the policeman, he'll likely not bother me again. I've also agreed with Sarah that she'll make sure I'm referred to as Tammy Smart, age 18, not Tammy Bonney age 16."

That seemed to be a natural break in proceedings so both sipped at their drinks. Jill continued her questioning, "you seem to have most things in hand, how do you feel?"

"I'm fine, I guess. Your question is a bit vague though."

"So perhaps I meant to ask how are you as Tammy and not Tom?"

"It's almost like I should have been Tammy all along."

"But you've only been Tammy full time since Sunday morning, and part time before that."

"So much has happened since Saturday morning when I was offered a part in your play, but I'm not just here for the ride now. I'm think I'm in control, mostly."

"That's an interesting way of putting it. Which parts are outside your control?"

Tammy paused whilst she considered her response.

"Being invited to a wedding, as a bridesmaid. I mean I'm looking forward to it, but I'm scared. It's not my choice but I wouldn't miss it for anything."

"Tammy, every girl wants to be a bridesmaid but is scared stiff. How was the dress?"

"It was lovely, but I'm not sure how there was one in my size ready so soon?"

"Tammy, I don't know the answer to that one. Now, all I see in front of me is a confident young lady, not a shy schoolboy."

"What do you know about Tom?"

"Not much but I have accessed your NHS records and there's nothing there beyond a few prescriptions for antibiotics."

"Have you spoken to the school?"

"I can't unless you give your permission. Similarly, now you're eighteen, I can't speak to your parents without your permission."

"Would you need to do that?"

"Not yet, but eventually you may have no choice."

"I guessed that would be the case, but dad won't be a problem."

"So he's accepted Tammy."

"Yes. He'll have more questions for me, no doubt."

"No doubt indeed, what about your mother?"

"She'll find this difficult to cope with, she's the same with any changes that affect her or the family, except the ones she initiates."

"I believe you're talking about Tammy staying beyond the play?"

"I suppose I am."

"Why do you believe that after such a short time?"

"Because I've spent maybe the last ten years believing that I was Tammy not Tommy."

Both reached for their coffees to find their drinks were now cool. Jill went to a small sink and rinsed the mugs, returning to the filter machine to refill them. Once sat, Jill continued.

"So what about the risks?"

"The risk of being discovered or the risk of having to revert to being Tom?"

"The first, but I'm interested in what you think about the second."

"Dad said he would speak to the school, so they will know anyway. PC St James knows but is under professional restrictions, similarly that bank manager is risking his job and pension if he says anything. Otherwise just you and Sarah."

"How long does the list have to get before you are forced to out yourself?"

"I don't know. I'll just have to deal with it I suppose."

"Have you considered that your medical records need to be updated, that other records will have no trace of Tamara Smart?"

"Not yet, but as you said, I've only been at this full time since Sunday morning."

"So, does this end when your school reopens, or when the play ends, or when you go home for Christmas, or never?"

"I wish I knew. I know I want the last choice but one of the others is more likely."

"What if you could go back to the school as a girl?"

"Two problems, first it's an all boys school, secondly I couldn't board there any more, it wouldn't be safe."

"What if you were a day student and lived in town?"

"That might work, but there would still be ridicule."

"I'm sure the head could cope and deal with that, especially if the school's reputation is at stake. So far as it being an all boys school, there's always a first for everything."

"If ..." Tammy started guessing how things might turn out, but couldn't put it into words.

"Tammy, we're out of time. Can you come back next Thursday, same time?"

"Sure."

They shook and Tammy made her way across the waiting area, heading for the exit.

"Miss Bonney?"

Tammy realised she was being called and spun round, to see a member of staff heading towards her,

"Could you come to the office please, we have a query."

Tammy followed the young man to the office and sat as he accessed the patient database.

"I understand that Dr Davison herself made this appointment but when we attempted to update your records we found that there was no trace of your name."

"Dr Davison said there might be a query, I just wasn't expecting it so soon."

Tammy reached into her bag and pulled out another copy of her solicitor's letter. "This explains who I am."

"I see."

He again searched the database and located Tom's sparse records. It also showed that Jill had recently updated the records.

"Right, I've found you. Are you changing your name permanently?"

"Yes, as far as I know."

"I'll make a notation on your record that you're to be referred to as Miss Tamara Smart but the actual record remains as Tom Smart for now, hopefully you won't be accidentally embarrassed."

"Thank you."

"If you decide to make the change permanent, you'll need a letter from Dr Davison, possibly something else, I'm afraid that's outside of my direct experience."

"Right. Is my next appointment on there?"

"Yes. Next Thursday, 27th November, at 10am."

Tammy thanked him again and headed out into the cold air, a marked difference from the warmth of the hospital. She walked along the road, passing the railway station. Her main thought at this time was that things were moving too quickly and, despite what she'd said to Jill, she was not in control.

How Tammy didn't get hit by traffic when crossing the many roads was a minor miracle, she was still on auto-pilot when she pushed she shop door open. It was nearly midday and her caffeine level had dropped to critical.

"Tammy, are you alright, you look spaced out? Get back here, I'll put the kettle on. You should have put a scarf and gloves on this morning."

"Sarah, please don't mother me. I'm fine, I just need a coffee."

"I'm making one right away but I get the feeling that something else is bothering you."

Tammy sat there for a few more minutes, nursing her mug of hot coffee, before she felt warm enough to take off her jacket. While she drank the coffee, Sarah closed the shop for lunch and joined Tammy in the back.

"So what's the problem?"

"Jill gave me alot to think about, plus I had to explain myself to one of the staff in out-patients. This is happening too fast, Sarah, too fast."

Tammy started to cry, Sarah leant over to comfort her but said nothing. After a few minutes Tammy wiped her eyes with a tissue and got up to go annd check her face. She realised at that point she was also desparate for the loo. She returned to the chair, looking a little fresher and without crossed legs.

"I'm sorry for being so silly."

"Nonsense Tammy, girls cry when they need to. You're no different."

"One day I might understand this."

"One day perhaps, but no-one understands everything, do they? Now, more importantly, why don't you have any gloves or a scarf?"

"I ordered some on Ebay on Tuesday, they haven't arrived yet. My school gloves would give me away."

"You need to get a gloves and hat set in town, go now to buy a set then take the bus home. The parcel vans never get here before lunchtime but it's now well gone one. I'll see you at five thirty."

Tammy did as asked, arriving indoors at two, picking up the day's post as she did. Tammy hadn't even managed to take off her new gloves when the doorbell rang. A courier stood there with three packages. She signed for them then carried them into the kitchen

Although tempted to open the parcels immediately she first identified a letter on the top of the pile of post addressed to Tom, tearing it open she saw it was from her mother.

Dear Tom,
 
I've tried to email you but my laptop has something wrong and I will have to wait until your father can fix it, I don't trust anyone at the hotel to sort it out. I hope you're well. Your father tells me he's in contact with you almost daily so you have someone you can talk to, of course you can always ring me if you want to.
 
He said you were trying to get into character for this play, and you had to learn some songs. I remember you singing a few years ago at a school concert so I hope your voice is still good enough.
 
Lots of love,
 
Your mother

Tammy noted that her dad hadn't told the whole truth to her mother, but he hadn't lied either. Tammy decided to leave the letter for now, and reply when she was able to. Tammy next started opening the various parcels, everything she'd ordered, except the hat and gloves, was there. She left the new lingerie and the other clothing on her bed then went to the kitchen to prepare dinner.

Sarah returned exactly on time. They were both hungry so sat to eat before any other business could interfere. As it was, the day ended peacefully, neither of them had any energy left and any remaining issues could wait until the next day.

Tamara's Début   Part Five   by Shiraz

 
Friday 21st November
 

The day started gently with little discussion between Tammy and Sarah, but once breakfast was out of the way Tammy rode to the shop with faux aunt. After about an hour of slow trading the shop started filling up. Many of the customers already knew that Tammy was going to be a bridesmaid and were asking about where she was from and where she'd been to school.

Of course, Tammy's life history that had sufficed for her Saturday appearances simply did not work on a weekday. Tammy's father had strongly hinted that the truth was needed but the truth right now could cause huge problems for Sarah, not to mention the theatre and the wedding. Tom's place in St Andrew's School was also at risk, at least until his father sorted that out.

So the adjusted story corrected Tammy's age and then included a sweeping statement about taking time out of school to get some practical business experience as part of her studies. Again this was a slanted version of the truth, just not the whole truth.

By lunchtime the shop was still busy, Sarah contemplated taking her usual lunch break but also reckoned on losing all that trade if she did. By 3pm the two of them had taken more money than the whole of the past five days. There was a lull just after 3.15pm when Sandy put her head in the door.

"Tammy, have you forgotten?"

"Forgotten what?"

"Your appointment."

"What appointment?"

Sarah finally heard the conversation, "Oh Tammy, I meant to tell you yesterday. Elsie has arranged for you to have your hair done. You best get going. I can handle the shop."

Tammy went for her jacket but took another full minute to get out the door as several customers wanted to speak. Sandy had already returned to her salon so Tammy shuffled along the darkening lane on her own.

As soon as Tammy pushed the door open Sandy was removing her coat and ushering her into a chair.

"Sandy, you only did my hair on Sunday. Why does it need to be done again?"

"My my, Sarah was not joking. Where did you hide yourself when you should have been exploring your girlhood?"

"Ummm."

"Don't worry dear, we'll get you sorted in no time. Now, we didn't have time to do your eyebrows on Sunday, did we? I really didn't have time to do anything more than a cut and blow dry plus putting in those extensions."

"So what do you want to do now?"

"If you leave this in my hands, I think you'll be surprised."

"Right, I think."

"Tammy, don't worry."

Tammy was calm this time, unlike Sunday's experience when she was dreading returning to school with a very fmale cut. Now she just felt comfortable whilst Sandy worked, knowing that she wanted her image to scream 'girl'. Tammy's natural colour was a mousy brown, Sandy put gloves on and started mixing a hair dye before massaging it into Tammy's hair.

While that was working its magic, she used some wax that was warming on the counter and drew it carefully along Tammy's eyebrows. Tammy was not expecting what happened next.

"What? That hurt."

"Settle down, not much more to do, we all have to suffer a little for our beauty."

Sandy finished Tammy's eyebrows then asked when Tammy had last done her legs.

"Erm, never."

"My dear, we really need to get you sorted. Let's get your hair rinsed first though, good job we're not trying to do this in the morning, although I'll still need you back at one."

"You will?"

"Yes, I've got Catherine and Elsie here at twelve. I've also left a slot for Alison and Andrea in case they can make it in time."

Sandy rinsed out Tammy's hair then picked up a pair of scissors and spent five minutes trimming, "just to tidy it up." She then shampooed and conditioned it before grabbing the nearby handheld hairdryer. Throughout this Sandy kept up a constant conversation, although Tammy didn't recognise many names of the people Sandy was referring to. Finally she switched off the hairdryer, Tammy was suddenly able to hear properly again.

"Lets just brush this out, wonderful if I say so myself. Take a look at this!"

Tammy checked the mirror and saw she was now a brunette. Sandy had also removed some of the layering so her hair hung straight down the side of her face.

Tammy's eyes now looked even less like Tom's. As Tammy she'd taken out her contact lenses and wore glasses instead, It made her look a little less like Tom, but did nothing for her natural beauty. In the past week she'd worn her contacts every day, her brown eyes now matched her hair. With a little mascara and eye shadow there was no trace of Tom.

"That's amazing, Sandy."

"Just my usual magic, but we'll have to recolour it for the play. Now, hop out of the chair, I'll take you to see our lovely Joanne."

They walked to the back of the salon and into a side room. Joanne was just stirring another pot of wax.

"Joanne, this is Tammy. Can you do your usual full treatment? Put it on the Catherine's wedding account, will you."

Sandy left the room, closing the door behind her. Tammy was not entirely aware of what would happen next.

"Right Tammy, slip off those jeans and shoes then get up on the table."

"Oh, I think I need to go."

"Look, you need to do this for tomorrow's wedding. We can't have hair peeking through your stockings, can we?"

"I suppose not, it's just I'm a little scared."

Tammy was more than a little scared, more like terrified. Although she'd opted for, ironically, 'boy shorts' that morning, complete with lace trim, her male equipment would not be hidden to close scrutiny. She started shaking.

"Come on Tammy, it's not that bad, and I've never had a complaint. I'm sure you've got nothing I haven't seen before."

Tammy almost replied to that comment but resigned herself to the waxing, and shuffled out of her jeans and socks before getting on the table. To her great relief, Joanne laid a towel over her knickers.

"We don't want any wax on your clothes, do we? It's a pain to get out. Right, this might sting a bit but you don't have much hair so we won't take too long. I'll go just above your knees, you're not going onto the beach soon are you? I'd hate to waste the time on a Brazilian if you don't need it."

"No, just above my knees is fine." Tammy's relief showed itself a little more than she'd have wished. She was now more confident that her secret was safe, although what was a Brazilian?

After fifteen minutes Joanne asked Tammy to roll over and had whipped the towel away before Tammy could say anything. She then laid the towel back down before waxing the back of Tammy's legs. Ten minutes later she'd finished.

"Roll back over dear, I'll just put some cream on your legs, that will soothe them. The redness will go down in a few hours, don't put any tights on, will you? Give it a minute to be absorbed then get dressed."

Tammy sat on the edge of the table before pulling her jeans back on. She was about to leave when Joanne stopped her.

"Tammy, I don't miss much, but I did see your little secret."

Tammy broke down at that point.

"I didn't want to do this, I didn't."

"Now, settle down before someone comes in an asks what the problem is."

"But I'm ruined. So's the wedding, and Sarah."

"No you're not. I'm not going to say anything, I wax two other transsexuals in town, you're just alot prettier than them and I wouldn't have known if perhaps you'd worn better underwear today."

"So you'll keep quiet?"

"Yes dear. Now, where's your bag? You need to fix your makeup."

"It's on a hook under my jacket."

"Give me a second, I'll go and get it."

Joanne left the room. Tammy knew she'd been discovered but didn't know if she could trust Joanne. She was torn between continuing as Tammy and returning as Tom, giving up the play and her new identity. Joanne returned and Tammy tried to fix her face but her eyes were still a little red.

"Don't worry about that, Tammy. If anyone asks we'll just say it was your first waxing, which is true. They'll understand."

"I hope so."

"Also, think about wearing simple knickers under undies like that."

"Thanks. I think I was in a hurry this morning."

Tammy returned to the main part of the salon and was guided to a nail station. Sandy approached and spoke to a girl, asking her to give Tammy a tidy up and just put a simple coat of Tammy's existing colour, pale pink, back on.

"Tammy, we'll do your nails again tomorrow so they match your dress. Today is just to get them into a better shape, we won't have time for that tomorrow."

The girl worked at Tammy's nails in silence, by the time she was finished he knew nothing about her, including her name. Tammy's nails however did look neater, but weren't very long given Tammy's previous incarnation as Tom.

Tammy was about to get out of the chair when the girl stopped her.

"Get your shoes off, let's have a look at your toes."

Tammy did as asked, although she wondered what was next. The girl produced a bowl of warm water and soaked both feet for a minute before drying one and picking up a rasper. Tammy was treated to a full pedicure, her nails were a glossier shade of pink than her finger nails, multiple layers of polish were applied before the girl was happy.

"You can put those back on." Tammy thought this was a bit abrupt but did as asked. Sandy approached and took a look.

"Tammy, did you enjoy that? You had the full package, all at Elsie's expense."

"I thought it was Catherine's account?"

"It is, but Elsie's picking up the tab. Now, lets have a good look, beautiful! I won't ask you to drop your jeans, I know Joanne always does a good job. That was your first time?"

"Yes, can you tell?"

"Your eyes tell me everything I need to know."

"I did wince a bit."

"So did I the first time I was waxed, don't worry it gets easier next time. I need to book you in for your next appointments, come to the desk with me."

They booked Tammy for her next hair and nails appointment two weeks hence, and for her legs at the beginning of December.

Tammy was painfully aware that she could possibly be back in school after a week but accepted the new dates which Sandy wrote on a card. Of course both appointments were Friday afternoons.

Thanking everyone, Tammy put her jacket on, grabbed her bag and walked out into the cold air. It was now half past five, Tammy had been there for over two hours. She found the shop's door locked and the lights were off, Tammy knew that Sarah had left for the night. She checked her phone and found a text from Sarah.

Meet @ car

Tammy turned around and headed for the carpark, looking in the corner they'd left the car that morning. Sarah's car wasn't there, Tammy started to panic. She spun around wondering if they'd parked somewhere else when headlights came towards her, moving out of the way she saw Sarah waving from behind the wheel. Tammy jumped in, very relieved. She then realised she need the loo, urgently.

"Sarah, I um need.."

"Don't worry, we're going straight home. I've just picked up some fish and chips for us. Sandy phoned to say you were almost finished, you were just a little quicker than I thought."

Sarah turned the car around and headed home. The roads were quiet this late on a Friday and they made the journey quickly. Tammy dashed out of the car and ran inside to deal with her urgent needs. Sarah picked up the hot paper bag containing the evening's meal and was in the kitchen putting out some plates when Tammy returned.

Tammy was surprisingly hungry and finished off her portion. She was going to relax when Sarah sent her to the shower.

"why?"

"We're going out, there's a taxi booked for eight."

"Why, where? It's rehearsal at the theatre tonight."

"It's the hen night, silly. I've spoken to Jill, she understands. Now, get moving. I need the shower as well."

***

Tammy was sat on the edge of her bed wearing only a bath robe when Sarah put her head around the door, similarly attired.

"Tammy, what's up?"

"I don't know what to wear, I mean I've never been to a hen night before, and, something happened."

"I don't have time for twenty guesses, so, tell me."

"I was found out."

"Okay, who and how?"

"I was being waxed, Joanne saw me."

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that."

"No?"

"Sure, she won't tell a soul. I've never heard any gossip from her when she's waxed me."

"She gave me her word, but can I believe her?"

"Yes you can, now get moving. You've got that short red dress over there, put that one. Your legs look nice, by the way. I expect to see you dressed when I get out the shower."

Tammy pulled the red dress out and started getting dressed, using her new black lingerie. She then slid some barely black tights on, sensing how different her legs felt as she pulled them up. Tammy sat in front of her mirror and applied some fresh eyeshadow, mascara and lipstick. She didn't need more than a little blusher on her cheeks. Next she stepped into the dress and pulled a black jacket out of her wardrobe. A pair of red heels were chosen.

"That looks good."

She was startled by Sarah's sudden comment and appearance but didn't show it, Sarah was just in her bra and knickers.

"I hope so, I mean I hope I got it right."

"Yes you did, now get downstairs and open a bottle of red, we need a drink before the taxi gets here."

Tammy wasn't aware of the need to drink before going to a party but guessed this was another girl 'thing' so she poured two glasses of burgundy then sat, waiting. Sarah was down ten minutes later - immaculate in an little black dress. They were finishing their glasses when the doorbell sounded, they headed out to where the taxi was waiting.

The taxi stopped outside the Central Hotel on Traill Street. Sarah paid the driver and dragged Tammy to a door that said Skinandi's. Outside it was peaceful, apart from the sound of taxis. Inside the music was so loud that conversation was difficult. Sarah had obviously been there before and knew how much to pay.

The doorman nearest to Tammy looked at Sarah and shook his head.

Sarah had to shout at Tammy, "have you got your ID with you?"

Tammy produced her bank ID, before long she knew she'd have to get something official, maybe a driving licence? Sarah paid for both of them and they walked onto the dance-floor. Sarah saw somebody wave from the far side and walked over,

"Hi Jill. I thought you might be here."

"I wouldn't miss it for anything. Tammy, there's someone you must meet."

Tammy was introduced to Catherine, the bride.

"Hello Tammy, my mother persuaded me that I'd accept someone I'd never met, but I wasn't expecting a beauty like you."

"I just hope I can do my best for you, but I've never been a bridesmaid before." Tammy did a twirl for Catherine.

"Tammy, it's not the most difficult job and you'll do fine. I just have to make sure David isn't distracted!"

"So do I!" They both giggled. Sarah walked up with two glasses of wine.

"I see you two have met."

"Mmmm." Tammy had put the glass to her lips, it wasn't the best red she'd ever tasted, but it would suffice.

Turning around, Tammy came face to face with one of the staff at St Andrews school, she'd met him a few times but didn't know his name.

"Tammy, this is John. He's the catering manager at St Andrews."

"Cathy, you never told me there would be a new victim here."

"John, I'm well aware of your many previous failed conquests, but be careful with Tammy, she's my bridesmaid."

"Cathy, as if?"

"That's right John." He blew a kiss and returned to his table a few feet away.

Tammy had never been one for nightclubs and given that she had only recently turned eighteen it was previously impossible to get in one anyway. However she was getting comfortable listening to the music and joining in with conversations, when she could hear them.

"Tammy, I'm going to the loo, you coming? Cathy can you keep an eye on our glasses?"

Sarah pulled Tammy across the dance floor and into the ladies. There was a short queue but they were sat in adjacent cubicles within a minute. Although it was quieter in there, neither felt it was worth saying much before they reached the sinks.

"What do you think of John?"

"What am I supposed to think? I mean he looks nice but he's not my sort."

"Let's get back."

This was Tammy's first experience of the necessity for girls to use the facilities in pairs. They reached the table and Cathy pushed their glasses back towards them. The glasses now had plastic lids, Tammy hadn't seen these before and asked Jill.

"I sent John to the bar to get them, you look as if you don't know why they're here?" I shook my head.

"Have you heard of the date rape drugs?"

"Oh, now I understand."

"You must have had a sheltered upbringing." This was said for Cathy's and John's benefit.

"You could say that."

Cathy spoke, "Tammy, we'll have to have a girly talk sometime, but here's the rest of the crew - late as usual."

"Sorry Cathy," was the chorus, then Julie, the apparent organiser, explained.

"The taxi firm said their eight seater was broken and refused to organise anything else. We spent twenty minutes getting through to another firm and then half an hour for it to arrive."

"You could have let me know!"

"We did, where's your phone?"

Cathy checked her phone finding four missed calls and three unread texts.

"Okay girls, thanks for getting here. This is Tammy who mum decided would be my bridesmaid." She feigned disgust, the girls tried not to laugh. There was another chorus, this time it was "hi Tammy".

Two of the girls headed to the bar, and three to the toilet, leaving Julie and an older woman, Debbie.

"So Tammy, how is it we don't know you?"

"I've not been in Thurso long. I'm taking a few months out and can't stay at home as my folks are in Switzerland. Sarah's an old friend so I'm staying with her and working in the shop for my keep. I used to work at weekends when I could but now it's all week."

"Tammy, you haven't told them the good news." Tammy glared at Jill before realising what she meant.

"I'm playing Anita in West Side Story."

Cathy answered, "wow! I'd loved to have done that. How did you get the part?"

"Jill spotted me in Sarah's shop a few weekends ago."

"Can you sing?"

"I suppose so, I can manage the songs for the show."

"I'll have to hear you one day?"

"At the show?" Tammy teased.

"Not sure if I can wait that long."

Sarah worked out what Cathy was thinking but kept it to herself. It was getting more difficult to talk anyway as someone might have turned the volume up. Another glass of wine was put in Tammy's hand and she indicated to Sarah that it should be her last, her throat was becoming dry and her tongue looser, dangerously so.

All the girls were now cooing around Cathy trying to find out what her dress would be like, and complaining that she had taken another previously eligible male off the list. Tammy felt a little left out as she didn't know the girls and, not having been a girl very long, was still learning the right phrases and responses that came so naturally to the group.

While she was looking into space John walked up and mouthed "would you like to dance?" whilst pulling Tammy off her chair and onto the dance floor. This was not like a school disco, or one of those weddings that you have to go to when you're younger. No, Tammy found that she could relax, but was it the alcohol? The upbeat number ended and a slow song started, Tammy recognised it from the Motown stable but couldn't place it. John pulled her tight, Tammy wanted to resist but it seemed futile.

John eventually led Tammy back to her seat, she was tired, no make that shattered, and Sarah saw it. Sarah gave her apologies to all and pulled Tammy out into the street to hail a cab.

Once indoors she made Tammy a coffee and insisted she drank it before it was cold. By the way Tammy was yawning Sarah knew that it wasn't necessarily the alcohol that had got to her, more like an early start and a long day. Sarah helped her out of the heels and the dress before sending her to the bathroom to wash off the evening's make-up. Tammy's lipstick was smeared, Sarah noted.

Sarah sent Tammy to her room so she could get ready for bed. She then went back down and saw the pile of post in the kitchen. Some of it was for Tammy but one letter was from Switzerland.

Dear Mrs Bonney,

I'd like to thank you again for taking care of Tom while the school's closed. Unfortunately I shall not be returning to the UK for the foreseeable future and won't be able to thank you in person.

I enclose a cheque to cover any additional expenses you may have but I regret it may be my last as I have initiated divorce proceedings. I'd be grateful if Tom was not informed as yet.

Kind regards

Tara Smart

Sarah folded the letter back up and put it in her handbag, what was she to do now? She took a look at the cheque, it was for £1000 which seemed alot for what could be one or two weeks. The rest of her mail was bills, which she left for the morning.

When Sarah eventually climbed upstairs she checked on Tammy as the bedroom light was still on. Tammy was dressed in her nightwear but was lying flat out on top of the duvet. Sarah helped Tammy into bed, turned the light off then went to her own room.

Tamara's Début   Part Six   by Shiraz

 
 
Saturday 22nd November
 

Tammy was still tired in the morning, she'd managed seven hours in bed before her bladder rang its' little bell and probably needed one or two more. She realised she'd had three glasses of red wine at the end of a long day and was still feeling the effects.

Once relieved, she noticed that her tongue tasted odd, almost metallic. She reached for the minty mouthwash and was just rinsing when Sarah appeared.

"Leave that out for me, my mouth feels awful. I think we should have ordered a bottle of decent wine instead of just taking the house red. Get into that shower now as you won't have a chance later, don't worry about your hair, you're getting that done at one. Don't put your decent undies on, take them to the shop. I'll see you downstairs in ten with a coffee."

Tammy tried to absorb all of Sarah's instructions then dived into the shower, washing quickly. Feeling fresher, she sprayed and powdered before dashing back to her room. She put clean undies on before heading to the kitchen in a gown.

"That took twelve minutes."

"It can't be done in ten, in any case I always thought girls could take as long as they wanted."

"Get real, we have to be at the shop by 8.30 today and that's twenty-five minutes from now. Your toast is cold."

"I'll get something in town."

Tammy rushed back upstairs and put on a pair of jeans and a sweater after a dab of makeup. She was back down ready for Sarah in ten minutes.

They arrived at the store just after 8.30, the traffic hadn't helped. Tammy headed straight to the bakery and chose some Danish pastries and a bag of filled rolls. She then remembered that she only had £20 left and thought she might need more before the day was out.

Tammy was stood at the ATM outside her bank getting a £100 out when there was a voice behind her.

"Good morning Tammy."

She quickly put her cash, the advice slip and debit card in her bag before turning round.

"Oh, morning John. Sorry, I'm not keen on anyone walking up when I'm getting cash out."

"Sorry Tammy. I must say you looked wonderful last night, but I can't help thinking that we've met before, or that we were destined to meet."

"John, I remember what Cathy said last night and I'm not ready to be another of your victims!"

"You never answered my first question."

"No I didn't, sorry but I need to get back to the shop."

She turned and walked briskly away.

"Bye Tammy, I'll see you later."

Tammy gave a little wave and continued on her way, getting to the shop just before nine.

"Where have you been?"

"To get these, some cash and dispose of an admirer."

"Who?"

"John, he obviously enjoyed himself too much last night, it appears I'm next on his list."

"Tammy, that's wonderful!"

"Why?"

"You're acting exactly like I did when I was your age."

"Oh."

"Look, it's fun. You'll have a breeze later today at the wedding. Now, get to the kettle, I think you could do with that pastry now, and then take lunch early."

"Okay."

The wedding arrangements were not as simple as Tammy thought it would be. At ten, long before she would have had a chance to get any food, a car pulled up and Tammy was told, by a young man, to get herself ready.

"Ready for what?"

"You're off to Cathy's, Elsie's orders."

"Oh."

Sarah had obviously realised what was happening, so quickly bagged Tammy's dress and picked up her lingerie. A few other items went in the bag and she was sent off with her driver.

"I'm Michael, by the way. I'm Cathy's little brother."

"I'm Tammy."

"I know, sit back and enjoy the ride. Oh, John left this for you."

Tammy was handed a small gift box. she decided to deal with it at her destination, her first thought was to hand it back without looking inside.

The journey was ten minutes out of town, to the North-West. Michael pulled into a long driveway and they drove up a gentle slope to the Georgian house. As Tammy got out of the car she turned around and saw the view over the harbour. The sea mist prevented her from seeing any further. At least it was dry today.

Elsie was on the doorstep.

"Come in, come in. Michael, pick up her bags please, bring them upstairs, Tammy has the Rose room."

Tammy, obviously, had no idea what was happening but followed Elsie inside, she was shown into a sitting room where Cathy was waiting with two girls, slightly older than Tammy.

"Tammy, meet Alison and Andrea. Girls, meet Tammy."

Tammy walked over, expecting to shake hands with the girls, instead they stood and gave Tammy a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Tammy wasn't expecting this either, but showed no reaction, other than a smile but returned the hug.

"The girls just arrived here, they managed to make the earlier flight from Heathrow."

"So, Cathy, do you still need me?"

"Don't be silly. My mother would never forgive me, and the girls have been desperate to meet the little one who was brought in without my say in the matter!"

Cathy and the two girls had a giggling fit, Tammy joined in to show she had got the joke, even if she hadn't. She decided to try and understand what was happening.

"Cathy, what's the plan? I mean I was going from the shop at one to get my hair done."

"Sorry Tammy, the girls rang from Wick so I re-arranged the morning. I first sent John to get the them which is why Michael collected you, John was not happy, let me tell you. He's demanded first, second, third and every other dance with you tonight."

"I met him this morning."

"He said he went into town to get you something, do tell us what it was, he was very secretive. Normally he can't keep his mouth shut, so that's not like him. He left it with Michael before he went to the airport."

Tammy reached in her bag and retrieved the small gift box. "I haven't had a chance to open it." She decided she was in a no-win situation, so opened the box to find a pair of diamond earrings. She gasped when she saw the size of the stones.

"Tammy, at this rate he'll be proposing next week, if not by the end of the night!"

"Cathy, I'm not sure I can accept these."

"Don't be silly, he thinks you're playing hard to get."

"He could be right."

"You vixen." The room collapsed in laughter. Michael appeared in the doorway with a silver bucket containing champagne on ice and a smaller bottle containing a red liquid, an older man followed Michael carrying a tray of flutes. Tammy recognised what was about to happen and started having doubts.

"Tammy, are you going to join us for an appetizer? Thomas, could you do the honours, Michael this is a girl only event, sorry, plus you're not quite eighteen. Tammy, you are eighteen aren't you? Oh, you know what this is, don't you?"

"Yes to both, that's Kir Royal if I'm not mistaken, so Bucks Fizz I guess. The Champagne goes straight to my head."

"Does the same to me, wonderful isn't it. Come on, pick up a glass."

"Cathy, I suppose I should propose a toast to the happy couple and a successful day?"

Alison picked up her own glass and there was around of glass hitting glass, until everyone combination had been completed. Their glasses were drained and returned to the drain. Tammy shook her head to attempt to release the gas from her nose.

"Girls, can you get upstairs and shower? There's a clean set of clothes for you Tammy, we've got to be out of here in an hour. Don't worry about your make-up, just use the minimum. Tammy you're in the Rose room, were you told? That's third room on the right at the top of the stairs.

"Cathy, I showered earlier."

"You've been working, haven't you? No excuses, get up there young lady!"

Tammy walked upstairs behind Alison and Andrea, and walked into her room for the day. A skirt and blouse were hanging up, there was a set of underwear on the bed, she stripped off her clothes and walked into the en-suite.

Tammy walked back into the bedroom wearing a towel, hanging from her non-existent bust. Two items had arrived in her room while she had been showering, now sitting on the bed, was a gift bag and a note. She timidly opened the bag and found a bottle of Dior perfume and a diamond necklace that matched the earrings. She felt tears weling up in her eyes, these were unknown emotions for Tammy. She wiped her eyes with a tissue and opened up the folded note.

Dear Tammy,

please accept these small gifts, I have barely met you but feel as if I have known you forever.

John
x x x

Alison chose that moment to knock gently and walk straight into the room wearing a robe.

"Hi Tammy, Cathy said you might not have any body spray with you so I brought my spare, oh is that Dior, I just love it, Tammy what's wrong?"

Tammy started to cry again and sat down on the bed, Alison sat next to her and gave her a hug. "Tammy, what's wrong?"

Tammy handed her the note and pointed at the box containing the necklace. Alison picked up the box and gasped when she saw what was inside. "Tammy, that's wonderful. How long have you known John?"

"Since last night."

"Wow girl. He's after you big time, I've never seen him move this quick before. So, what's wrong?"

"It's too much."

"Look, take it at your speed, don't let him rush you. Enjoy the moment but don't be afraid to say no to him, he's been dumped before so knows what it's like."

"I s'pose so."

"That's it, now dry your eyes." Alison stood up and turned to face Tammy, unfortunately her twoel slipped at that moment, exposing her almost flat chest. Alison looked away but then found the breast forms that had been abandoned on the bed next to that morning's bra. Tammy blushed deeply.

"Oh, late developer? I needed chicken fillets until I was seventeen and I couldn't dare tell anyone, your secret is safe with me. That's not why you're worried about John, is it?" Tammy decided that this might be one of the reasons she was frightened of John's attention and nodded, putting her head down in apparent shame.

"Tammy, look it's not a problem. If he really loves you then it won't matter. You'll get there in the end, right now you just need a little help, there's no shame in that. Like the legs, by the way, when were you waxed?"

"Yesterday."

"Shame it's November, we could all do with a few hours in the sun! At least we'll have stockings on."

Alison now turned and left the room, Tammy walked over and locked the door. She wanted no more unexpected visitors, her other secret could be very damaging if exposed, literally. She finished getting dressed and brushed out her hair before applying light makeup.

Tammy walked back downstairs and found the rest of the group waiting for her, a second glass of Bucks Fizz was poured. Tammy hoped that would be the last, for now at least.

John arrived, "your carriage awaits." His eyes were on Tammy who had achieved the look of an innocent, making her look almost sixteen again. They were handed coats by Thomas and ushered into an eight seat bus. Tammy looked at her coat, it wasn't one of hers but it fitted perfectly, Cathy looked and laughed.

"Another one of Elsie's decisions, I'm afraid. You'll get used to them."

The ride down town was full of conversation, with Tammy joining in where she could. They pulled up outside Sandy's salon in the no parking zone but John didn't seem to worry. "In you go ladies, I'll see you at half one."

Of course they were already ten minutes late but, despite that, Sandy fussed over them. Cathy, Alison and Andrea were sent to sinks and the hair dye was mixed up. Tammy heard a voice calling her name and saw Joanne stood there with a beckoning finger. Tammy followed, curious.

"Tammy, we need to tidy you up a little," she whispered. No-one else was paying any attention so Tammy went into the waxing room.

Take off your blouse dear, there's some hair on your arms that could be cleaned off, and your armpits need doing. Don't worry, I'll be gentle. Then we'll go for the Brazilian!"

Tammy looked shocked, but couldn't find the right words. "Don't worry my dear, you just need a little help in disguising your little problem."

Just under an hour later Tammy walked slightly awkwardly into the main area. Cathy was sat at a nail station and saw the discomfort.

"She got you, did she?"

"Yes."

"I remember my first Brazilian, I didn't go in expecting or wanting it, she just told me it was being done, no argument. I bet she did the same to you."

"Yes, I'm not sure I can forgive her."

"You'll get over it, and you'll go back for more, especially when you want to wear a bikini without showing too much."

"I can understand that." Tammy laughed, knowing that she'd achieved a double meaning without trying. Sandy was stood there, looking cross.

"Look Tammy, we're running late as it is and Joanne should have known better. Get in that chair."

As it was, Tammy's hair only took twenty five minutes, and most of that was while she was being blown dry. The nail station was next. Thankfully her nails were a decent length so only needed minimum effort, that was another thirty minutes. Her make-up took a final fifteen minutes, just enough for that innocent look.

By one forty five they were all done, kisses all round followed before they could head back into the bus, again parked illegally. Tammy spotted a notice in the windscreen and tried to read it, but was at the wrong angle, their driver thought he was the subject of her attention. John looked into Tammy's eyes, "where have you been all my life?"

Tammy answered slowly, "everywhere and no where." That earned a round of applause from the girls and stunned silence from the driver. Tammy was quoting a song, 'Hi ho silver Lining' and the lyric actually read 'everywhere and no where baby, that's where you're at,' but Tammy wisely only used the first few words. The intention was to confuse, instead she managed to make John more determined to snare his latest attraction. He felt familiarity with her that he'd seldom felt before.

The ride back included descriptions of their treatments at the salon. Cathy and the two girls had gained highlights, Alison and Andrea now had a cut that matched Tammy. Cathy had her long blond hair partly braided. Their makeup was impeccable. They walked back inside at two o'clock. Cathy sent each of them to their rooms so get ready. Tammy felt a little light headed and mentioned this to Cathy, a minute later Thomas appeared with a banana and a jug of iced water, he carried these to the Rose room and set them down.

"Would Miss require anything else?"

"No thank you Thomas."

Tom had encountered staff previously so knew the routine. Tammy played the sweet little girl act to perfection, perhaps too good. She locked the door and finished her banana before washing her hands in the bathroom. Her nails were now a deep purple. She then peeled off her clothes, leaving her simple knickers on as an added precaution.

Once in her lingerie she found a garter belt and spent a few minutes trying to get it on. She gave up, wrapped a gown around her and knocked on the next door. Alison opened the door and saw the garter belt and stockings in Tammy's hands.

"Come in, you've not worn stockings before, have you?"

"No, I'm getting a bit confused. I don't think the champagne helped."

"You'll do fine, put it round your hips and pull the tabs through your knickers. Oh, why are you wearing two pairs?"

"Um, I didn't want to ...."

"I'm sorry, I suppose you didn't want to stain your nice knickers, it's quite sensible, are you using a tampon?"

"No, I'm not on my period, it's just ..."

"Look, don't be embarrassed, we all have minor accidents at times. I've got some pantyliners here, they'll keep you fresh. I suppose you didn't pick any up this morning?"

"No, could I take a couple, just in case?"

"Sure."

They finished putting Tammy's stockings on then Alison asked Tammy to zip her up. Alison's dress matched Tammy's. She added a tartan sash.

"Come on, let's get to your room and finish you off." The first thing Tammy did was to head into her bathroom and insert the thin liner.

Ten minutes later they walked downstairs together, talking as if they'd known each other for years. Tammy was now wearing her new jewellery and perfume, Alison had insisted that Tammy's normal gold studs wouldn't do, and, in any case, didn't match the necklace.

"Wow, the necklace! Let me guess, John again?" Andrea spotted the sparkling diamonds as Tammy walked into the sitting room. "Come and join us." A small single malt was waiting, Tammy suddenly remembered a dream she'd had a few weeks earlier and visibly shook.

"Tammy what's wrong? Sit down, It'll be alright, you'll enjoy yourself."

"No, it's the scotch, it brought up some bad memories. Can I just have some water?"

"Certainly." A glass was poured for her, which she sipped slowly.

They all stood and slipped on their heels. Tammy now got her first good look at Cathy. She was a picture in cream, wearing a tartan sash like the other girls, fixed with a diamond encrusted brooch.

Thomas walked in the room and coughed gently, Cathy spun round. "Two minutes please Thomas, could you make sure the driver has his instructions."

"Certainly Ma'am."

There was a group check up for their makeup and clothing before they headed out of the house, towards the white Rolls Royce.

Tamara's Début   Part Seven   by Shiraz

 
Saturday 22nd November, 3pm
 

They arrived at the Registry Office a customary five minutes late, according to the clock in the Rolls Royce. Cathy was helped out of the luxurious car by the chauffeur, the three bridesmaids exited shortly afterwards. As Tammy stood on the pavement she felt light headed and would have fallen if Andrea wasn't able to quickly hold her.

"Tammy, just hold onto me and you'll be fine, we all have nerves at weddings."

All Tammy could manage was a swift "thanks" but she wasn't convinced it was nerves. David was waiting for Cathy at the front of the ornate room, the girls took their seats in the front row. Tammy was more than pleased to sit down, partly as she wasn't feeling on top form, and partly as her heels were hurting her.

The ceremony itself was simple, John and Alison acted as witnesses. Photos were taken as the bride and groom signed the register and the flashes did nothing for Tammy's situation. The party moved outside where more photos were taken, once again Andrea helped Tammy stay upright, Tammy felt as if Andrea was fighting a losing battle.

The Rolls Royce took Cathy and Andrea away from the Registry Office, then John appeared with the minibus to collect the bridesmaids, Elsie, and more of Cathy's family. Tammy squeezed her dress onto the narrow seat and buckled up with difficulty. The journey was not as smooth as the ride down, not that Tammy had been told where the reception would be.

Fifteen minutes after extracting the minibus from the centre of Thurso, always fun on a Saturday afternoon, they drove back through the gates of the house where Tammy had spent several hours already. She did not look well when they exited and Alison took charge, taking Tammy straight up to her room. She unzipped the lovely dress then took Tammy into the bathroom. Tammy was promptly sick into the loo. Alison insisted she have a pee as well.

Alison cleaned Tammy up and helped her back to the bedroom. She found a nightdress in a drawer and helped Tammy out of her remaining clothes. When she got to Tammy's knickers, she took off the outer lacy pair but left the second pair on. She dressed Tammy in the nightdress and slipped her into the covers.

When Alison walked back downstairs, the reception was in full swing in the conservatory and a marquee at the back of the house. Andrea saw Alison and took her to one side.

"What's up with Tammy?"

"I'm pretty sure it's the Bucks Fizz on an empty stomach, plus the stress of the day. I'll have to confirm that with Sarah, Tammy's guardian."

Alison walked over the Sarah and prised her away from a very happy Elsie.

"Hi Sarah."

"Hi Alison, how's the job going, you're both at The London Hospital aren't you?"

"That's the one. Now, can I talk about Tammy?"

"Yes, is there something wrong?"

"She's been sick and is in bed right now, I don't think she had much to eat this morning?"

"Only some toast, we were running late. She had taken some lunch to the shop but Michael came for her a few hours earlier than I was originally told."

"That confirms my thoughts. She had two glasses of Bucks Fizz here earlier. She was complaining of being light headed, I just put it down to the day, I should have seen it earlier. Sarah, there is another problem."

"Oh?"

"I undressed Tammy before putting, em, her, in bed. She's very lovely but she's a he isn't she?"

"Yes."

"So what's the story, I mean when I saw her as a lovely girl this morning nothing tipped me off. When I was upstairs just now I helped her to the toilet, I don't even have to be a nurse to work that one out. So, what gives?"

"The short version is that she's been helping me at the shop for months, she's really a boy at St Andrews but is now living full-time as Tammy. She's seeing Jill at the hospital, but she's already changed her name. She's also due to play Anita in West Side Story at the Mill."

"Right, that helps. If you'd like I'll have a word with her when she wakes up. It's only four thirty so we might be able to get her down for some food later after she's slept this off."

Jill saw the pair and wandered over, "When shall we three meet again, in thunder, lightning, or in rain?" She muttered.

"Hey, we're not witches and don't go quoting Shakespeare, and definitely not The Scottish Play, some of us are superstitious." Sarah laughed after telling Jill off.

"So is this a private discussion or can anyone join in?"

"It's about Tammy."

"Where is she? I haven't seen her since the Registry Office?"

"She's upstairs sleeping off a small alcohol problem that wasn't her fault, Alison helped her into bed."

"Oh."

"Jill, her secret is safe with me, you know that I work with transgendered patients, don't you?"

"I didn't but I guess you would in London, TG patients are almost as rare as hens teeth up here."

"As I said, I wouldn't worry. I'll help Tammy get down here when she's had an hour or so. The alcohol should be out of her system completely by then."

The three of them agreed the official line was that Tammy had felt faint and was resting before joining the party later. The only one who showed more than just concern for Tammy was John, who complained bitterly that his dance partner for the evening was missing. The three, apparently unplanned, individually had a quiet word with John and persuaded him that Tammy would appear later.

Alison and Andrea changed out of their dresses and into something simpler for the party, although the new frocks were simpler only in that they finished above the knee and started only just above the bustline. There had been a conspiracy, by Elsie again, so that each of the bridesmaids had the same dress for the party, Tammy's was hanging in her room, she just hadn't see it yet. Sarah had just managed to take the black set of Tammy's new lingerie up to the house when Elsie rang with the plan late that morning.

It was about five thirty when the food was declared open season. Alison went into the Rose Room and gently shook Tammy.

"Tammy, wake up or you'll miss the party."

"Ummmm."

"Come on, let's get you to the bathroom. You need a shower."

"Had two already."

"Yes, but you've been sick and that won't do. Let's get you to the loo first."

Alison had persuaded Tammy as far as the toilet when Tammy objected.

"Tammy, firstly I'm a nurse and secondly I know your secret, but it remains a secret. I promise. I've spoken to Sarah and Jill, I believe they are the only ones here who knew. Now, get on that loo and then into the shower. I'll wait in the bedroom while you're washing."

"Umm, do you promise?"

"Yes, now get moving! I'm missing a party!"

Tammy did indeed move and returned to the bedroom a few mins later smelling a little sweeter. Alison had her clothes ready but grabbed a hairdryer first.

"You've got lovely hair. Is it all yours?"

"I've got some extensions, but apart from that - yes."

"Right get dressed, you'll need a strapless bra again so I've taken the extra straps off your black one. I'm not moving out of here until you're ready, so don't even think about climbing back into bed."

"Yes mum."

"Hmmm, I'm not old enough to be your mum, not by a long way. Now MOVE!"

Fifteen minutes later a dressed and made-up Tammy made her entrance, she could hear light music coming from the rear of the house. Alison made certain Tammy was given some iced water, which she sipped slowly. Although there was no direct suggestion that she should try any food, it was accepted that Tammy could graze later when she was ready. The bride approached, having herself changed out of her wedding dress.

"Hi Tammy, are you feeling better?"

"Hi Cathy, yes thanks. I'm sorry for ruining your day?"

"Nonsense, no-one saw you faint and Alison handled it like any nurse would, you did know both the girls were nurses, didn't you?"

"I didn't but I do now, Alison told me."

"Anyway, you're here now. Circulate, there are plenty of people waiting to meet you."

"Thanks."

Tammy headed for Sarah, who now had Elsie for company again.

"Tammy dear, you do look lovely. Are you recovered?"

"Yes, thank you Elsie. I think the day just got to me."

"I'm not surprised, just take it easy and don't be afraid to take yourself upstairs if you're tired."

"I'll do that, thanks Elsie."

Tammy walked over to the drinks table and refilled her glass of spring water. She headed to a quiet seating area, well away from the band where she sat in silence for a few minutes, just to make certain that she was in full control of her body. Suddenly she felt the urge to go to the toilet, but didn't know anywhere on the ground floor. Once again she went up the stairs, this time moving as fast as she could in heels and her tight frock. She made it into her room's en-suit bathroom but didn't have time to shut the bedroom door as she passed through.

Tammy came out of the bathroom glad that she'd made it in time but upset that this was happening on this day, of all days. She sat on the bed and cried, that's where Jill found her a few minutes later. Jill closed the bedroom door as she walked in.

"Tammy, talk to me."

Tammy continued sobbing but allowed Jill to reach over and give her a hug. She slowly regained her composure, but her make-up was ruined, Tammy's hand was streaked with mascara where she'd rubbed her eyes. Jill pulled out a tissue from somewhere and dabbed Tammy's eyes gently.

"I'm a failure."

"No you're not."

"I am. I am."

"Now, forget that stupid idea. You're a typical teenager who's experiencing her first bridesmaid duty. You made the fatal error of alcohol before lunch, I bet you'll promise not do that again but most of us have repeat offences to our name. So you're not a failure, you're Tammy, you're human."

"But I'm letting Cathy and David down."

"Don't worry about them, they would rather have you in bed than trying to force yourself downstairs. You didn't make a fool of yourself at the Registry office, which is where it mattered. I'm told you were a little faint there, but no-one apart from Andrea noticed. Don't worry."

"Yes, but Alison ..."

"Alison and Andrea are nurses in London, that's why they couldn't be certain about being here. Their hospital is handling a load of winter flu cases and is busier than normal. They have seen just about everything they could possibly see during their careers, plus they are bound by a code of ethics, just like me."

"I see."

"Look, you've got nothing to fear. I'm seeing you on Thursday, aren't I?"

"I think so."

"Let's fix your make-up and get back to the party."

The rest of the evening passed without further incident, although John did attempt to pull Tammy onto the dance floor. He was turned away with vague suggestions about female issues, he felt it wise not to argue the point. Sometime after nine Tammy felt well enough to have a few bits off the cold buffet but this was more from need rather than desire.

The party wound up just after half past ten and most of the guests left, with Michael running the minibus into town ferrying a few dozen guests in the process. A stream of taxis outside the house dealt with many of the rest. Tammy looked for Sarah but couldn't see her.

"She went with Michael on the first bus run," explained Andrea. "Don't worry, we'll get you back in the morning. Now are you tired?"

"No, but I should be. Why?"

"Let's get up to our rooms and get changed, then come into my room, I'd like to talk to you. Alison will be there."

"I think I can guess what this is about, perhaps I should just call a taxi?"

"Tammy, you've got nothing to fear, it's just us three bridesmaids, right?"

They went upstairs to their rooms, Tammy removed her face for the fifth or sixth time of the day and looked at her bed as she re-entered the room. The bed linen had been changed and a new black lacy nightie was laying on the bed, a gown next to it. There was a matching pair of knickers, which Tammy picked up first. As a precaution she put them back down then picked up a plain black mini brief, into which she inserted a panty liner, followed by the fancy knickers.

Tammy tied the gown around her and walked along to Andrea's room and knocked. The door was opened and Tammy joined the other two girls. Each of them was wearing the same nightwear, Tammy looked between the other two girls, now sat on Andrea's bed and smiled.

"Tammy, this is another of Elsie's little jokes. You best get used to them, she's been doing this to us since we were kids, she's our aunt. Cathy is our cousin, but she has no sisters."

"Alison, I get the feeling I've been stitched up, right from when Elsie first asked me to be a bridesmaid, I mean was there ever any doubt that you two would be here?"

Alison shook her head, "Tammy, we honestly didn't know for sure. With the winter flu situation, we could have been told to work the weekend even though we'd booked it off months ago. I hope you don't mind, I told Andrea of your secret, although she'd guessed anyway. Years of training tells me that much, even if you don't have any visible male traits, and that is disconcerting."

Andrea took over, "Tammy, we're not passing judgement and you have carried this off wonderfully, that nightie really suits you, as did the dresses, you just don't have all the right curves yet. How far did you want to take this? You don't have to answer."

Tammy sat down in a chair and hung her head for a few seconds before looking at the girls again.

"I don't know. I don't know. It feels right but I'm frighted it's wrong."

Tammy kept quiet for half a minute before continuing, the girls said nothing.

"I've wondered for years what it would be like to be a girl, I have no sister or female cousins so I have no-one to copy. Then my mother insisted she couldn't look after me while dad was out of the country so I ended up here in a private school."

The Alison and Andrea looked at each other, silently they decided Andrea would ask the next question. She spoke softly, "Tammy, are you at St Andrews?" Tammy nodded, looking ashamed.

"Do you want to go back there?"

"I don't know. It would be difficult. My dad is working on it."

"How much longer do you have?"

"I take my A levels in May next year."

"Shouldn't you be taking Highers as you're at a Scottish school?"

"I'm English so dad thought it would be better to take A levels, my school offers both."

"Your accent is very Scottish, but not quite a Highlands accent. It's difficult to place."

"I've been up here for ten years, I just picked it up. I don't use it at the school, some of the masters might think
I'm taking the piss."

"I can understand that."

Alison took over, "Are you seeing Jill?"

"Yes."

"She's good, don't worry about her. Jill will look after you, Tammy. We've got all of tomorrow to talk, Andrea and me aren't heading south for a few more days but I think you're ready for sleep."

Tammy started to cry. "What's wrong Tammy?"

"You've been so kind, I mean everyone has, but I'm still frightened."

"We'll sort things out tomorrow, somehow. Off you go."

Alison and Tammy went to their own rooms, Andrea waited for a few minutes then listened at Tammy's door. She heard Tammy sobbing gently and pushed the door open.

"Tammy, are you alright?"

Tammy shook her head.

"Would you like some company?"

"Yes."

Andrea went round the king size bed and slipped in next to Tammy. She wrapped her arm around the younger girl, they both fell asleep within a minute.

 
Sunday 23rd November
 

On Sunday morning, just after seven, Alison found the pair asleep. She walked up to the bed and spoke quietly into Andrea's ear, "come on sleepy head, I hope you've been a good girl."

Andrea and Tammy stirred and looked at Alison, now sat on the bed in her gown. Alison continued, "if I'd known this was a group session I'd have joined you."

"Alison, if I'd known you were interested ..." The three girls giggled loudly.

"Come on you two, get showered, breakfast is at eight, Cathy and David are going at nine. We've got to see them off."

The three girls all headed for their respective bathrooms and freshened up. When each girl returned to the bedroom there was another, matching, dress waiting. Tammy found new lingerie on her bed and dressed, slipping her breast forms into the bra. Today's dress was cream with a rose motif, Tammy was just zipping herself up when the other two girls came back into the room. They waited while Tammy put a little lippy on.

"Tammy, do you have to shave?"

"Only once a month or so, why?"

"I can't see any beard at all and you don't use concealer or foundation, do you?"

"No."

"Did you ever think it strange that you have a natural soft complexion?"

"Not really, although I did used to get teased a little, I just thought it sort itself out when I got older."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that, I'd say you're a very lucky girl. Now, get downstairs, it's just gone eight."

The girls walked into the breakfast room, Tammy was beginning to wonder just how many rooms this house had. Elsie, Cathy, David and Michael were already there, Thomas was carrying team and coffee in from the kitchen.

They sat down and Thomas poured them a coffee. Conversation was very light as the others were already tucking into their porridge. Tammy wasn't particularly hungry but made best efforts at some scrambled egg and bacon, followed by two slices of toast. She sensed that Elsie was about to ask a question but Thomas the butler arrived in the room.

"Excuse me Miss Smart, there is a call for you in the Study. If you wish I shall bring some coffee through."

"Thank you." Tammy dabbed her lips with a napkin and followed Thomas to the study. She sat at the desk and picked up the handset.

"Hello?"

"Good morning Tammy."

"Dad! How did you find me?"

"Sarah told me you were with the McPhersons, I've known the family for years so had their number. By the way, that's the reason I chose St Andrews; it was a personal recommendation, Elsie is the current Head's sister."

"Oh. I did wonder why I ended up all the way up here."

"Yes, now Sarah told me you've had an eventful weekend, but I need to speak about something else. Your mother has decided to divorce me. It wasn't a surprise for me, and I don't think it was for you either?"

"I didn't know until just now."

"Sorry, I thought you'd already been told, Sarah said she received a letter from your mother a few days ago."

"Sarah said nothing to me."

“I'll speak to her again. Now, I'm flying from Heathrow at lunchtime and I'll be at Wick Airport a few hours later, Elsie will sort out some transport for me. Stay where you are and I'll see you before dinner this evening. Got to go, love you."

"Love you too, Dad, bye."

Tammy sat there for a minute then there was a knock at the door. Thomas entered with a tray.

"I'm just leaving, Thomas."

"If you'd care to follow me to the sitting room I'll set you coffee there."

"Thank you."

Tammy walked into the sitting room and sat. Cathy walked over and held Tammy's hand.

"Tammy, your father spoke to us earlier whilst you were still upstairs, we're sorry to hear the news. it's a shame I'll not see him, it's been a few years."

Elsie spoke next, "Tammy, you can stay here for as long as you need, your father as well, he's a very good friend we don't see very often. I recommended your school to him, by the way." Elsie winked at Tammy, that's one more person who knows Tammy's secret.

Tammy decided to change the subject, "Cathy, where are you and David going for your honeymoon?"

"To the Bahamas first then onto Australia."

"I hope you'll enjoy yourselves."

"If last night's anything to go by, yes we will!"

There was a noise from the lawn behind the house, where the marquee had been last night. A helicopter landed about 100yds from the house.

"Our transport has arrived! We have a flight from Glasgow at lunchtime, this is the quickest way."

"I'd say."

"I hope that's not envy Miss Smart, I understand that you're worth half a mil yourself." Elsie was smiling as she said it.

"Half a mil? I don't know, I haven't checked my piggy bank recently."

That earned a laugh, Alison and Andrea looked dumbfounded. Outside on the lawn, cases were being loaded onto the chopper. Everyone filed out onto the lawn, somehow Cathy had gained a small bouquet which she carried to the steps of the helicopter. The three bridesmaids lined up, and stood, smiling, as Cathy and David boarded.

As Cathy reach the top of the steps she threw the bouquet, Tammy caught it. Andrea and Alison clapped their hands, then pulled Tammy clear of the helicopter as it got ready to depart. Back at the house they waved as the chopper lifted, then swung to the south. The three girls, Elsie and Michael walked back indoors. Back inside the house, Alison and Andrea pulled Tammy into the sitting room; Tammy was still clutching the bouquet, unsure what to do next.

Tamara's Début   Part Eight   by Shiraz

 
Sunday 23rd November Continued
 
Elsie called Thomas who gently took the bouquet from Tammy. Once he left the room, the questioning began again.

"Aunt Elsie, how much do you really know about Tammy?" Alison tried to prod her aunt for information.

"My dears, a lot more than you may think. I met Tommy before he started school, in fact he stayed here when he was five or six. I also went to most of the school plays and the inter-house rugby matches, you do know I'm on the Governing Body of the school?"

"So, Tammy's real name is Tommy?"

"No Alison, my real name is now Tamara. It was changed five days ago."

"Wow! So you're serious! How long have you lived as Tammy?"

"Full time, since last Saturday."

Alison and Andrea just sat there, uncertain what to say next, Elsie picked up the conversation.

"Tammy, I hope you don't mind but I've been keeping an eye on you, your father and I were somewhat concerned about you, starting from when you were first at the school. But, that's why you were up here, so we could make certain you were ok. I hope you don't mind me saying this but your mother didn't seem to care which school you went to, so long as it was a boarding school. As your father may have said, the Head is my brother, however, I also talk regularly with my sister-in-law, in fact they're invited for dinner tonight."

"You can't!" Tammy was getting upset.

"Tammy dear, don't worry. You were recognised last week by the Head's wife Mrs McIntosh, you don't think she was fooled, do you? She did tell me though that it wasn't until you were out of her car that she finally worked it out. You're quite a good actress."

"So the Head knows?"

"She hasn't told him yet, as far as I know. They'll be here at six so you've got all day, oh and I've invited Sarah, your father's arrival was unexpected but Richard is always welcome. Tammy, have a relaxing day, I'm sure that my nieces will help you."

"Of course we will, Aunt. Come on Tammy, let's get out of these frocks. It's a dry day so we're going for a walk, the air's much cleaner than in London."

The three went upstairs and changed into jeans, pullover and clean walking boots, downstairs they found Barbour coats and thick gloves before heading outside. The gardens backed onto over a hundred acres of land formerly fenced by the McPherson family and now partly open to the public under the Land Reform Act. The land extended to the cliff path and the three girls headed in that direction.

Thankfully, unusually for November, it was a calm day and the three could follow the path safely. After an hour they turned back, although throughout the walk Andrea and Alison had been trying to pry information from Tammy. At first she was rather reticent but eventually opened up, explaining how she seldom saw her mother and was sent to the Highlands without any apparent reason being given. Andrea wondered if anyone at school had suggested that Tom should have been a girl?

"No, not at all. Sarah was the first one who identified me as a girl then helped me with some clothes and showed me how to use make-up. It was then I knew for sure that I should have been a girl, it suited me better than being a boy."

"Did you just go to Sarah and start buying clothes? It's not the cheapest store."

"No, I just hung around looking in the window. As you know the shop's in one of the narrow lanes so few people came down there, especially at nine thirty on a Saturday morning. I was outside imagining myself in the frocks when Sarah pulled me into the shop and worked out what I was doing."

"So why did you started working for her?"

"To pay for the clothes she first gave me, although I could have easily handed over cash for them and walked away. The thing was I didn't want to let my dad know about the extra money I might be spending."

Alison took over, "but you're not exactly broke, are you?"

"No, but most of it is in trust until I finish school. I can keep what I earn during the summer when I work with my dad, but it was there to help me for the rest of the year. Fortunately I didn't spend much of it over the last four years, when I was working, so I had a few thousand available if I needed it."

"Why not spend that?"

"Because dad would have seen me spending, that's exactly what happened last Monday, I had to transfer money because I didn't have enough clothes for the week if I was going to stay as Tammy."

"Why not tell him earlier how you felt?"

"Consider this, I'm in an all boys private school and both my parents are always either out of the country or five hundred miles south of here. Even if I had told him, what could have happened? Mum would disown me, the school would kick me out and dad could get ridiculed at the bank. I'd lose my holiday job, the sponsorship as well. That was my whole life, I had nothing more, I couldn't risk it."

Andrea picked up the thread, "what's changed?"

"Circumstances and good luck I suppose. In the space of two days I was asked to play a female lead in a musical and the school was closed because of a problem in the kitchens. I could finally explore being the girl I am. That's what has changed, I'm not that shy schoolboy anymore."

"I've not seen any shyness in you Tammy, just a girl who's still finding her place in the world."

"Thanks."

"You're welcome. Now, what are we going to do about John?"

"My god, I'd forgotten about him."

"Do you like him?"

"He's a bit creepy."

"Yes, he tried to hit on us once!"

"Both of you at the same time?"

"He thought we came as a package. Obviously he forgot we were his cousins, Aunt Elsie gave him one hell of a dressing down when she found out."

"How did she find out?"

"We told her!"

The three of them laughed at that one.

"John doesn't live at the house, does he?"

"No, Aunt Elsie wouldn't let him bring his so-called girlfriends back to the house so he moved into a flat in town. She wouldn't pay for the flat either as he had moved out of his own accord, that's why he got a job at the school. Aunt Elsie put a good word in for him though."

They were now virtually back at the house so cut the conversation. A few minutes later they were warming themselves in front of the fire in the sitting room. The bouquet Tammy had caught was now in a vase, Thomas brought coffee in and they were told that lunch would be served in an hour.

Elsie joined them shortly after. "Tammy, were the girls easy on you?"

"I've had worse interrogations at school, but only just."

That earned a laugh. The three heard Michael walk into the room so that line of conversation was killed even before it began. Instead, Andrea and Alison told stories about their experiences at The London Hospital. Elsie was called away to the phone and returned a few minutes later.

"Tammy, your father managed to get an earlier flight but is flying into Aberdeen instead, he'll be here in about an hour. I've arranged for a helicopter to get him."

"Do you own a helicopter?"

"Not exactly, but we get a good rate on charters as I own shares in the company. I've told Thomas to delay lunch until one so that your father could join us. I doubt he would get any food on either flight, at least nothing worth eating!"

The conversation turned to small-talk about the town, then to fashion. Michael became uncomfortable when visits to the beautician were mentioned and made his apologies. The all giggled at his sudden departure, Tammy got the feeling it was engineered but didn't dare ask.

"Girls, John is joining us for lunch and Tammy's father won't be long, I suggest you go up and make yourselves pretty."

Andrea and Alison stood then almost dragged Tammy out of the room, up the staircase.

"Tammy, that wasn't a suggestion, it was an order, sort yourself out and freshen up. That breeze has dried your face, use moisturiser."

Tammy walked back into her room, it had obviously been cleaned as the bed had been made but now some of her personal items from Sarah's were on the dressing table. Opening the large walk-in closet she found all of her female clothing. Her few male clothes couldn't be seen, of course most were apparently still at the school. Her laptop and phone were on a desk, both on charge. Tammy checked her mobile, she found eight missed calls, they could wait.

She shed her outer clothes and stepped into the bathroom for a wash, then returned to the bedroom to re-apply her makeup. A second look through her clothes caused ten minutes of indecision before she selected a simple long skirt and sleeveless blouse, choosing a cardigan to cover her shoulders. Finally, in a pair of flat sandals she made her way downstairs, as she reached the bottom of the stairs she saw her father.

Tammy ran to him and flung her arms around her father, then started crying. He led her to the sitting room, everyone else silently left the room and the door was closed behind them. Richard Smart sat on the couch, his former son next to him. He allowed Tammy to continue crying for a few more seconds before speaking gently.

"Tammy, it's alright. I'm here for you, you're my child regardless who you are."

"Dad, I'm sorry." Tammy's voice was strained.

"Tammy, you have nothing to be sorry about. I'm the one who should be sorry."

Richard felt tears welling in his own eyes, he reached for a box of tissues that was sitting on the table and gave one to Tammy, her make-up now ruined, then took one for himself. It was another minute before they both regained their composure.

"Tammy, sit up. I want to see my daughter."

Tammy dried her eyes again, now red from her tears and black from her mascara, not that it mattered right now. She sat upright, then stood and sat down again after smoothing her skirt.

"Tammy, if you want to be my daughter then you shall be my daughter, I'd say you make a beautiful young lady. I wondered if the wedding photos Elsie emailed had been photo-shopped but now I can see they didn't do you justice."

"Thank you."

"Now, give me a kiss and go upstairs, you've messed up your face!"

Suitably chastised Tammy left the room, Alison was waiting outside and walked Tammy to her room, straight into the bathroom. Once again her make-up was cleaned off, then lightly re-applied. It was a different, more confident, Tamara Smart who returned to the sitting room, Elsie gave her a kiss as she walked in, her dad likewise. A jug of water had appeared and Tammy was handed a glass, a gong indicated the start of lunch.

Lunch was a cold platter, very much self-service. Despite the long walk Tammy wasn't feeling hungry and only took one slice of ham and a small wedge of cheese. The bread was still warm, probably baked in the kitchens. A few minutes into the lunch John walked in and took a place at the table. His eyes focused on Tammy who was sat between her father and Alison. Richard saw the look straight away. Elsie, who was to his right, whispered into his ear.

"John, I don't believe we've been introduced, I'm Richard Smart, Tammy's father."

John coughed and nearly splattered everyone with the water he was drinking. The suspicion was that Richard had timed his comments to perfection. John didn't look up for the rest of the lunch, at least not towards Tammy.

Tammy passed on the fruit tart that was offered and asked to leave the table, Alison took a look at her and ushered Tammy back to her room. Once there Alison dived into her own room and found her digital thermometer. She took Tammy's temperature and found it over a degree above normal, Tammy's pulse was also slightly higher than it should have been. Alison insisted Tammy went to the toilet then laid her on the bed.

Alison returned downstairs just as John slammed the front door. She ignored that then found Richard and Elsie, who were now talking in a corner of the sitting room.

"Aunt, who's your doctor? We need him."

"Tammy?"

"A temperature and slightly increased pulse, probably a virus but I'd want a second opinion."

"I'll get Thomas to call, there should be one on duty at the hospital, otherwise we'll get Dr Hoskins out of the Golf Club."

"Alison, is she alright? I mean what's been going on?"

Elsie, Richard and the two girls sat in a small circle near the open fire. Over the next hour Richard was given a summary of what had happened over the past week. It was clear that Elsie had spoken at length with Sarah before lunch, before sending Michael to collect Tammy's possessions. Alison said she'd spoken to Jill but, apart from confirming Tammy was her patient, hadn't managed to get anything out of her. Of course the girls, between them, now had Tammy's inner thoughts. They were careful what they gave to the group, Tammy would have to say some things to her father personally.

Richard thought for a few moments, "so, is Tammy a girl?"

"Mr Smart, Richard, your daughter is a typical eighteen year old girl who's just a little unsure of herself. she's had a sheltered upbringing, hasn't she?"

"Andrea, yes and I'm mostly responsible for that. Are you telling me however that my Tommy has become this lovely young lady in the space of a week?"

Elsie answered, "Richard, I've seen your daughter in Sarah's shop for months. That's not an act, it's natural. She has been your daughter for a very long time, years, but you didn't recognise it and I'm very sure that Tammy was too scared to tell you. I can only imagine what Tara would have said."

"Quite, perhaps it's for the best that she won't be involved in Tammy's future."

Thomas knocked and entered the room, "Doctor Hoskins has arrived."

"Thank you Thomas. Alison, would you like to take the Doctor up to Tammy. Richard, I suggest you wait here." Elsie was in her element when organising everyone.

Alison introduced herself as a nurse then led the doctor to the Rose Room. She quietly told Dr Hoskins that Tammy was likely to be transgendered and was under the care of Jill Davison. As the Doctor was nearly sixty he had his own preconceived ideas as to aware what he might see.

When he walked in the room, however, he saw a teenage girl. Tammy was still dressed but was on her side, hugging a pillow. The water next to her didn't look to have been touched. Tammy was glistening, she'd been perspiring, gently Alsion woke her. Alison felt she should intervene given that Tammy had never met the Doctor.

"Tammy, it's Alison, wake up, wake up. The doctor is here to see you."

Slowly Tammy opened her eyes. "I don't feel well."

"Tammy, my name is Dr Hoskins. Can you sit up? I need to check you and take your blood pressure."

Alison helped Tammy sit on the edge of the bed, supporting her as the doctor carried out his tests, confirming the raised temperature. He pulled out a stethoscope, lifting her top to give him access. Tammy jumped as the cold metal touched her.

"Tammy, I believe you have a mild case of the flu coupled with exhaustion. I suggest you get plenty of rest and please drink plenty of water. I want you to take Paracetamol four times a day and see me on Tuesday, as a precaution I want to take some blood."

He retrieved a cannula and three cannisters from his case, then proceeded to take three vials of blood which he labelled. Alison put cotton wool on Tammy's arm, held down by sticking plaster. The Doctor now left the room so Alison helped Tammy undress and put on her nightwear, finally returning her to bed, propped up with pillows. Alison went to her own room and retrieved some paracetamol which Tammy took, reluctantly, washed down with a glass of water. Alison re-organised the pillows so Tammy slipped down the bed then covered her up. She made sure the curtains were closed before leaving the room. Either she or Andrea would check Tammy every hour, it wasn't absolutely necessary but Elsie would insist regardless.

Downstairs the Doctor asked some questions about Tammy. her father looked around the room then spoke to the doctor.

"Doctor Hoskins, my name is Richard Smart and Tammy is my daughter. I'll be happy to answer any questions, although the girls will know more about what she's been doing this weekend."

"Can I have her details, including her birth name."

Richard gave the details then handed over a copy of the Statutory Declaration that legalised the name change.

"Mr Smart, your daughter has a mild case of the flu but she is also exhausted. I have prescribed bed rest, paracetamol and fluids, however I have taken some blood as a precaution."

He bid his farewells before heading to the hospital's path lab to drop off the blood samples, he had muttered about wanting to get back to the Golf Club before they finished serving lunch. Alison then asked what had happened with John, as she was the only one who'd missed John's departure, Elsie answered.

"As you know, Richard introduced himself to John at lunch. It seems John then recognised the surname Smart and recalled that Richard had visited the family a decade earlier, with a son."

She recounted the exchange, "you knew, you bloody knew. I've been chatting up a schoolboy, a boy from St Andrews no less. He's a faggot and you knew. I will make certain everyone knows."

"John, you'll do no such thing if you want to keep that job."

"I couldn't care less about that job, do you think I'm a fool? You were all in on it, when were you going to tell me, when?"

"John, it wasn't like that. Now calm down."

"Not likely, I'm out of this nut house."

Elsie said how he had turned and stormed out of the door, slamming it. The hallway remained had quiet until Alison had come down from Tammy's room, asking what had happened. Alison wondered what would happen next, then she saw Michael stood in the doorway, having heard Elsie recall the incident.

"Mum, everyone, are you telling me that Tammy is a boy?"

"Michael, no Tammy is a girl but we believe she is transgendered."

"Oh, she looks very nice." He looked at Richard then apologised for his comment.

"Michael, that's okay. I think my daughter looks good as well?"

"If you don't mind, what's her real name?"

"It's Tamara Smart and, yes, she is a pupil at St Andrews. The Headmaster is due here in a few hours for dinner when Tammy's future will be discussed. I'd be grateful if you didn't say anything, but since you now know what the situation is, you are welcome to listen."

"Right."

Michael wandered out of the room. Elsie saw him leave then suggested that Michael wouldn't cause any problems, "he has a few gay friends and is quite receptive to alternative lifestyles. Michael will be supportive, I know he will."

Elsie entered the study then phoned Sarah and asked her to join them a but earlier than planned. Elsie returned to the sitting room where conversation had turned to arrangements for Christmas. Elsie suggested that Richard and Tammy should stay over for the festive period, if Tammy wasn't still living elsewhere .

Sarah arrived half an hour later. Elsie immediately introduced her to Richard, her first opinion was that she found him to be a true gentleman, certainly not a hard-nosed businessman. She recounted to Richard what had happened during the week, as well as the preceding months.

"Where is Tammy?"

"She's in bed with a dose of the flu, the doctor has seen her."

"How is she now?"

"Resting, it sounds like she's had quite a weekend. Can I speak to you alone for a minute?"

Sarah and Richard walked into the study, Richard gestured that they should sit in the large leather chairs.

"Sarah, I understand you have spoken to my wife."

"I spoke once but she's also written to me enclosing a cheque from her, I haven't banked it yet."

"I suggest you don't, I've closed the account she probably used for that cheque, it's nothing that you've done. If you have any expenses then let me know and I'll sort that out. I hope you don't mind but I spoke to Elsie and we thought it best if Tammy stays here for the time being, I know you've looked after her but Elsie is a very old friend and has close connections with the school."

"If you think it's best, then I don't have a problem. Can she still help me on a Saturday?"

"I don't see why not, if Tammy still wants to."

"She's been a great help, my trade is up on days she's at the shop."

"I wanted to mention that, but can we talk later or I can come to the shop tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow might be best."

They returned to the sitting room, afternoon tea had arrived and Richard helped himself to a slice of apple tart. She made a gesture to suggest he should be watching his weight, that earned a mild giggle. Andrea excused herself and went to check on Tammy, returning a few minutes later as the girl was fast asleep.

The rest of the afternoon was spent chatting. Richard recounted stories from the bank, and incidents at the many hotels he used in Europe, the Far East and the States. The girls told of the more humorous stories from their hospital, Sarah told of Tammy's and her stories from the shop. At various times the girls took it in turn to check on Tammy.

At five, Elsie suggested they dress for dinner and sent them all upstairs. Richard's room was the far end of the corridor with a striking view towards the cliffs and the sea beyond. Richard had brought a suit with him which was now pressed ready. First, however, he took a shower; travelling can undo a morning's best efforts in the space of a few minutes.

Refreshed and clean-shaven he returned to the bedroom. several of his shirts were also now hanging, newly ironed. He opted for a Thurso Golf Club tie; he kept his membership even though he was rarely in Thurso more than once or twice a year.

Back downstairs he read the Sunday Times as the others returned to the sitting room. The girls were back in dresses, this time it was the ones they'd worn for barely an hour that morning. Sarah had brought a dress with her and had now changed into it. Richard looked at her for a few seconds before reminding himself that he was still, technically, married. Sarah noticed him but pretended otherwise.

"I just checked on Tammy, she's sleeping. I'll give her another paracetamol when she wakes."

"Thanks Alison." Richard was thankful that he had two lovely nurses available, even if they were just supposed to have just been there for the wedding. The doorbell sounded and Thomas brought the visitors to the sitting room, Elsie welcomed them.

"Anne, Steven, how good of you to come. You know most here of course, but this is Richard Smart."

"Ah, Mr Smart, you are Tom's father?"

"Please call me Richard. Yes to your question, although I'd like to talk to you about that."

"Certainly, is he joining us?"

"I'm afraid Tom is a little unwell."

"I do hope he'll make it back to school tomorrow."

"As I said, can we talk later?"

"Certainly, now shall we rejoin the ladies?"

Anne McIntosh was speaking quietly with Elsie and Sarah. They switched the conversation as Richard and Steven McIntosh approached. They were called for dinner a few minutes later. The meal itself was some of the best food Richard had eaten of late, he had started thinking several weeks earlier about coming back to the UK permanently so he could experience home cooking again, as well as to be near his son. He was now seriously considering his own and Tammy's future.

After the coffee and brandy, announcing the end of the meal, Richard took the Headmaster to the study.

"Now, Richard, what is the problem?"

"It concerns Tom as you can guess, except that's not his name any more."

"Now you're getting me confused."

"Tom is now Tamara, Tammy for short, and is living as a girl."

"I hope you are not winding me up."

"Not at all, I have the necessary legal document with me. Tammy is upstairs with the flu right now otherwise I'd let her explain it to you herself. Your wife has met her, by the way."

"She hasn't said anything to me."

"No, but she has told Elsie."

"Women!"

"If we can get back to the matter at hand?"

"Certainly."

"I take it from your earlier comment that the school re-opens tomorrow."

"Yes, we tried to phone all the students or their parents on Friday. I presume you didn't get the message?"

"No, and Tammy hasn't mentioned it to anyone. Obviously she wouldn't be fit to return to school tomorrow and she's due to see Dr Hoskins on Tuesday."

"I can understand that, but I guess are you wondering if he, she, can return to school at all." The headmaster was getting the distinct idea that his job was about to get complicated.

"Yes, obviously she only has six months left before her A Level exams so switching schools is not an option. I'm not sure she'd want to continue to board and Elsie has, in any case, offered to let her stay here."

"So you're thinking she returns as a Day student?"

"Yes, but there is another problem, isn't there?"

"Quite, as you know, St Andrews is a boys school, there are no female students. We don't have the facilities."

"Apart from access to a female restroom, I can't see that Tammy would have any particular needs."

"I hear what you're saying but I fear the Governors will want to consider the exceptional circumstances. Can you put your proposal in writing and send it to the school? I suggest that a psychological report is needed for the Governors, to make certain that he, she, is sane."

"My daughter is under Jill Davison at the Dunbar, I'll speak to Jill tomorrow and send a letter when I receive something. Shall we rejoin the others?"

Richard Smart and a bemused Steven McIntosh walked out of the study and into the Sitting Room, where the women were cackling.

"Anne, I understand you've met Tamara?"

"Yes dear, several times at Sarah's shop. Last Saturday. I spoke to Tammy at the shop then gave Tommy a lift back to the school. I made the connection after I spoke to Tommy in the car. I must say, Tammy is much more relaxed and talkative than shy Tommy, I do hope we'll have Tammy at the school, she'll be a breath of fresh air."

"We'll have to see."

Tamara's Début   Part Nine   by Shiraz

 
Sunday 23rd November Continued
 

Elsie took her brother, the Headmaster, to one side and spoke quietly.

"Steven I know Richard has spoken to you about Tammy and I must tell you that I fully support Richard and Tammy, I think you'll have guessed that your wife does too. Obviously if you need to speak to the Governors then I'll be there, in fact I'll be speaking to many of the other Governors tomorrow if I can."

"Elsie, you know I want to do this properly as it would require a major policy change."

"Yes, but we might find ourselves in a difficult legal position, the discrimination legislation, as well as the Human Rights Act, will fully apply as Tammy is now over eighteen and not in compulsory education."

"I'm well aware, but from what I've read unless there is a report confirming a medical situation then there is no precursive situation and Tommy Smart would be expelled if he breaks the dress code. Even sixth formers are bound by it."

"Now Steven, don't get wound up. If you're worried about the school's reputation then until this afternoon very few people knew about Tammy being formerly Tommy, although Tommy Smart no longer exists - Tamara Smart is her legal name. Anyway, I digress, one member of staff, your nephew, has found out the connection and is threatening to expose Tammy, with the implication that the school will have to become involved in a damage limitation exercise."

"What is the basis of his problem?"

"He thought Tammy was a real girl and tried to take her as a girlfriend."

"Did Tommy, Tammy, lead him on?"

"No, either myself, Cathy or your nieces were with Tammy at all times. She did everything to reject him short of saying it to his face, indeed I believe that was to have happened today, but Tammy fell ill beforehand."

"So what am I to do?"

"Is the report from Environmental Health available?"

"Only the summary."

"So, what is the conclusion?"

"That there was a hygiene problem, mouse droppings were found."

"So there's the answer. The catering manager, my son, is directly responsible for the kitchen. He will also have signed a non disclosure agreement regarding all pupils and staff so we can either sack him or demote him or move him. If he's sacked the NDA still holds and we take legal action if necessary."

"He's your son and you'd advocate that?"

"Yes."

"I see."

"I suggest you phone him and remind him of the NDA, he can see you and Harry tomorrow."

"You are forcing me into a corner, little sister."

"That's what sisters are for, Steven. Use the phone in the study."

Elsie found Anne and Richard talking. "I've sent Steven to speak to John."

"Will he stop John?" Richard was showing some strain.

"I hope so, but we can only go so far with John, we can't gag him."

"Elsie, Richard, leave Steven to me." Anne was quite formidable at times.

"If anyone can persuade him, I know you will."

"So what do we do next?" Richard posed this to Elsie

"Nothing more tonight, let's wait for tomorrow morning. We need Tammy well so she can speak for herself and we need Jill Davison to see her, I've already organised that. Steven will have to deal with John for now, I'll speak to some of the other Governors."

Andrea and Alison had been talking to Sarah, catching up with the local gossip, but now joined the other three. Everyone was brought up to date before Sarah said she had to get home, but first she went upstairs to see Tammy.

Tammy was fast asleep. She'd been seen half an our earlier by Andrea who had helped her to the toilet as well as administer another paracetamol. Sarah quietly closed the door and went back downstairs, she said her goodbyes and left.

Steven and Anne were next. The Headmaster came out of the study slightly red in the face. He suggested to Anne they needed to get back to the school, their home, and thanked Elsie for a wonderful meal. Richard declined another Cognac and said he wanted to turn in, but first he also had to check on Tammy, giving her a kiss. By nine thirty everyone had gone to their room.
 
Monday 24th November
 
Monday morning brought a flurry of activity starting at seven. Alison checked Tammy, who was still asleep. Thankfully all the rooms had en-suite bathrooms so everyone was down for breakfast at eight, not having to suffer queues for the shower. Half way through a piece of toast Andrea decided she needed to check Tammy, in fact she had meant to go to the Rose Room before heading downstairs.

She entered the room and was surprised and pleased that Tammy was stretching.

"Good morning Tammy."

"Morning? What day is it?"

"Monday and you're missing breakfast. Get in the bathroom, have a wee and a wash and get your pretty rear back in here sharpish. You might want to use some of that mouthwash while you're there."

Tammy returned a few minutes later, looking slightly better. Andrea poured a glass of water and gave her a paracetamol. She then checked Tammy's temperature, it was nearly normal. She held up a gown, which Tammy wrapped around herself and the two walked downstairs.

Tammy was about to be rushed but a look from Elsie stopped that, Andrea helped Tammy to the table, she was plainly weak. Thomas arrived with some tea for Tammy and asked what she would like.

"Just some toast right now please, and strawberry jam if you have it?"

"Certainly, Miss."

Richard decided he would ask the questions, he was sat opposite Tammy. It would of course be an obvious question.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm not sure, I'll might know after some toast."

That was the end of the questioning, Tammy's toast and jam arrived shortly after. She definitely looked a little brighter after the toast and a cup of tea. A second cup was poured and Tammy asked for a second round of toast, this time with marmalade.

Alison helped Tammy back upstairs and sat her on the bed which had been changed whilst Tammy was downstairs.

"Are you well enough to get dressed and go back down?"

"I think so."

"I'll help you and if you need anything ask me or my sister, right?"

"Yes."

Fifteen minutes later they were back downstairs, they walked through to the conservatory and sat on a wicker couch, a pot of coffee was sat in front of them. Tammy poured a cup of coffee, black filter coffee, and sat back to sip it.

Elsie walked in and stepped up to Tammy, quietly she said, "don't feel you have to stay down here, go up if you need to, just make sure one of us knows."

"Yes Elsie."

Richard had disappeared into the study to phone to his secretary. Elsie had plainly been making some calls already and a bouquet of flowers arrived for Tammy, otherwise Tammy was left to talk quietly with Alison.

"When do you have to go back to work?"

"We were due back tomorrow, but I've taken some leave I'm owed. Andrea will fly back after lunch. If all is well I'll go back on Wednesday or Thursday."

"You don't have to stay, I'll be fine."

"You're not fine, not yet. I'll take you to see Dr Hoskins tomorrow morning, he wants you there at nine, first patient, so you won't have to wait."

"Have you heard anything about school?"

"They went back today, but the Head knows you're not well. Aunt Elsie and your Dad are handling the school."

"Will they let me back? What did the Head say?"

"Wait until your Dad sees you, he may know more than me." It was an excuse to stop this line of questioning, Alison wasn't sure Tammy could deal with it yet.

Tammy sipped her coffee, unsure if she should say anything. Michael walked into the conservatory and went straight to Tammy.

"I'm glad you're feeling better, if you need anything then please ask me." He bent down and gave Tammy a kiss on the cheek. Tammy in turn blushed.

"Michael, I thought you were in college?" Andrea asked as she too walked in.

"I don't have any classes before lunch on a Monday, and the food's better here than the cafeteria."

Alison could see that Tammy was still a little unsure what to make of Michael's attention, Alison thought it might be time to talk to Tammy alone.

"Tammy, I think it's time to make yourself pretty, I mean even prettier, come with me."

Tammy reluctantly followed Alison up to the Rose Room and sat her in front of the dressing table. Alison pulled up a chair next to her.

"Tammy, I get the feeling you like Michael."

"I don't know."

"It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, you go wherever your heart takes you. Now, I think the males wouldn't be able to leave you alone after we've applied a little of this." She pointed at the cosmetics, "not too much though."

Ten minutes later they walked back down, just as Richard Smart came from the study. Tammy ran to her father and threw her arms around him, burying her head in his chest. He reached out and in turn held her for a minute, everyone in the hallway made a discrete exit.

"Tammy, let's go to the sitting room, it's empty now." He could see Elsie indicating. They walked slowly, Richard closed the door behind them. They went to the couch, somehow there was a pot of hot coffee waiting there. Richard poured them both a cup.

"Tammy, firstly I think you need to know what's happening. Your school re-opened today and everyone was called on Friday. Did you get a call?"

"I had eight missed calls on my phone but I haven't checked them yet. I haven't look at my emails either."

"That's not a problem, deal with those when you're ready."

"So when can I go back to school, if I can?"

"The Head isn't sure, he needs to speak to the Governors. Officially you are off due to illness and that is all the staff will be told. Did you know that Elsie is a Governor?"

"I didn't, I presume that helps?"

"Yes. We've asked Jill to see you today as the school will formally ask for a medical report before they'll allow you to return as a day student, not a boarder. What they will do is send your coursework and allow you access to the intranet. For now, all your work will have to signed as Tom Smart, do you understand?"

"Yes, if that is what it takes."

"Now, there is another problem. John has found out that you were Tom and he's angry. He thinks you were leading him on, did you?"

"No, I didn't." Tammy started crying.

"Tammy, I'm sorry but I had to ask the question." He picked up a tissue from a strategically placed box and handed it to Tammy.

"Elsie is upset with John and the Head is seeing him today. He's going to remind John that he signed a Non Disclosure Agreement, we hope that will sort John out. Elsie will put pressure on him too. Otherwise we'll go for a gagging order in court."

"Is this all necessary? I mean, this is happening because of me?"

"No, you're not the only reason but I can't say any more right now."

"Okay, but if I stay at the school, where can I stay?"

"Here, Elsie has already offered. You probably don't remember but Elsie's husband was my second in command until he died five years ago. We'd worked together for nearly thirty years, straight from university. I wasn't his boss and he wasn't my assistant, we were a team."

"I don't remember him, or this house."

"That's alright, Elsie remembers you and cares about you."

Tammy shuffled in her seat and was obviously thinking of something. "Dad, what about mum?"

"Tammy, I haven't received her divorce papers yet and I can't tell her about you until I get those papers. My solicitor is working on it. She might try and use you in the divorce, to get to me."

"She can't!"

"She might try, that's why knowledge about you can't go any further than Thurso and the bank's legal team. Don't worry."

"I don't think she ever cared about me."

"Tammy, it's wrong to think that way. She did care, she just didn't show it very well. Regardless of that she is your mother."

"I suppose so."

"You know so. Come on, let's join the others."

They both stood up, Richard gave his daughter a kiss then took her hand as they made their way to the conservatory at the rear of the house. Alison and Andrea were playing chess but abandoned their game to give Tammy a hug.

Richard suggested that Tammy check her emails and phone messages, she went to her room and sat at the writing desk. Firstly she checked her phone calls. She identified all bar one of the numbers, two calls were from the school, three from Sarah, two from her father and an unidentified mobile number. She then played the three voicemails.

"This message is for Tom Smart, this to let you know St Andrews will be open on Monday 23rd November. Please ensure you are back at the school by six PM the previous day."

"Tammy, this is Sarah. Can you call me? I want to know you're alright."

"Tammy, where did you go after the reception? I need to see you again."

Tammy erased all of the messages, how had John got hold of her mobile number? It didn't matter now. Her phone started ringing, it was her mother's number.

"Hello mum."

"Hello Tom. I tried to get you at the school but they said you weren't well. Sarah Bonney said you weren't staying with her any more but my battery died before she could tell me where you were. So, where are you?"

"I'm with the McPhersons."

"What! I don't want you staying there, who put you up to this, was it your father?" She was quite angry.

"No mum, I fell ill during a wedding reception at the house and they looked after me, two of Elsie's nieces are nurses."

"I want you out of there and back at that school, they said they couldn't get hold of you."

"Mum, I was in bed with the flu, today's the first day I've been up. My phone was at Sarah's until yesterday lunchtime and I've only just checked my messages. It's not a problem, dad has spoken to the Headmaster."

"Where is he?"

"If you mean the Headmaster, he's at the school."

"Don't be sarcastic, I mean your father."

"He's here."

"If he's interfering, I'll get every penny he's got."

"I wouldn't bank on that mum, if you'll excuse the pun."

"I'll speak to you later when you're more civil."

"Bye mum." Tammy ended the call. This was not good. She forgot about her emails and went to find her father. Tammy gave him a summary of the call, Thomas brought her a fresh coffee.

"Thanks Tammy. If she calls again, tell her to call me. She seems to have forgotten that you're over eighteen and capable of making up your own mind."

"I think I can handle her, but she won't be terribly pleased, especially as I'm not a little boy any more!"

"I don't think she'd see the joke."

"Perhaps not, but it's true. Anyway, what about the money?"

"Don't worry, it's all safe. She won't get what she expects as I simply don't have it. By the way, your trust fund now owns several houses, businesses and lots of shares, had I mentioneed that?"

"No, aren't you supposed to have told me?"

"Do you remember the documents you signed last birthday? One of them was a financial authority certificate."

"So you used that?"

"Yes, we'll sort out the bits and pieces after the divorce, but you're worth alot more now, alot. Congratulations."

Tammy fainted.

"Tammy, Tammy, wake up."

Tammy opened her eyes and found Elsie looking down on her.

"Drink this." She held a glass of water to Tammy's lips, a paracetamol was popped into her mouth.

"Do you want to go up to your room?"

"No, I'll be alright. Did I faint?"

"Yes, it sounds like you had a bit of a shock. Don't worry dear, it happens to us." She missed off the word 'girls'.

Tammy sat back up. She reached for her coffee but it was now cold.

They all sat and talked about the pending divorce, Alison and Andrea learnt more about Tammy's history as Tom. Elsie just nodded, she obviously knew most of this already. After half an hour lunch was called. They all went to the dining room for a light lunch, Tammy wouldn't have been able anything heavy just yet but this time she did eat more than she'd managed since Thursday evening, three days earlier. They were just finishing lunch when Jill arrived at the house, she joined them for a slice of cake and tea before moving to the sitting room.

They talked about the wedding while Jill finished her cake, she then suggested her and Tammy move to the study, Tammy insisted her father was also there. Tammy introduces Jill to her father, and vice-versa.

"Tammy, you've had quite a weekend, but what is it that can't wait until Thursday?"

"My school."

"In what regard?"

Richard spoke, "the Head is not going to accept Tammy back at the school, not yet at least. He says he can't sanction a change of policy. There will have to be a governors' meeting."

"That partly explains the call from my father. I wasn't able to tell him anything, however. What's this about the Catering Manager, John McPherson?"

"He has discovered that Tammy was a schoolboy at St Andrews and thinks he's been setup. The Head was due to see him this morning."

"My father was in that meeting, it didn't go well apparently."

"Oh?" Tammy couldn't manage anything more.

"I don't have the details and I think it's best if you hear it from the Head. So, how are you taking it, Tammy?"

"I don't know, I only found out all this a few hours ago. If you're going to ask whether I want to be Tommy again, no I don't. I am Tammy. The problem will be convincing everyone else."

"Dr Davison, I realise you don't know Tammy very well, but we might need you to write to the school."

"I can guess what you want me to say, but it is too early to say that Tammy is transgendered. I feel I'll need a second opinion seeing as I've met Tammy in the shop several times. What I might be able to do is say that it is advisable for Tammy's mental health that she remains as Tammy for now, subject to an early examination by a gender identity specialist."

Richard asked, "who would you suggest?"

"Professor Roberts at the Glasgow Royal Infirmary but his NHS list is booked months ahead."

Tammy took over, "does he do private work?"

"Yes, but he's not cheap."

"That's not a problem."

"I'll give him a call then but can you get there?"

Richard intervened, "Tammy is recovering from the flu and isn't going anywhere. Can you find out when he's free then we'll send a helicopter for him."

"Okay, I understand that the McPhersons have access to one."

Co-incidentally there was a loud noise from outside the house, Jill looked out and saw a chopper landing on the lawn. There was a knock at the study door, Elsie opened the door.

"Tammy, Andrea's just going." Tammy got up and went straight to the front door where Andrea was waiting. They hugged each other then kissed.

"Tammy, promise me you'll be careful."

"I promise."

"I'll phone later, bye!"

"Bye Andrea!"

Tammy returned to the study, closed the door and sat down. "Tammy, before I make this call, are you serious about this?"

"Jill, I want to get back to school. If this is what it takes then I want to do it."

"Right, I'll speak to him. Do you two want to speak to Elsie about the helicopter?"

"Dr Davison, Elsie and myself jointly own the company, although currently Tammy has my fifty percent."

"Right, this is beyond belief but I'll accept what you're saying for now."

They walked to the sitting room, a fire was blazing in the hearth. Elsie spoke to Richard briefly before turning to Tammy. She asked how Tammy felt.

"A bit tired, but otherwise okay."

"How about you take a nap, we'll wake you at five."

"Right." Tammy gave Elsie and her father a kiss before heading up the stairs. She kicked off her shoes, cleaned her face and flopped onto the bed. She was asleep within five minutes.

Meanwhile Jill and Richard were talking in the study.

"So will he take it?"

"Professor Roberts can only fit Tammy into his schedule after six on Wednesday, and he's unsure about flying in the dark."

"That's okay, suggest he brings his wife and an overnight case. They can have dinner, he can see Tammy and they can stay the night. We'll have him back at the hospital for nine on Thursday morning."

"I'm not sure, but I'll speak to him again."

Richard went to rejoin the others but his mobile rang, his solicitor told him that the divorce papers had arrived and had been sent to his London home. Richard informed him he was in Thurso with his daughter.

"I thought you had a son?"

"No, now I've got a daughter, it's a long story."

"I think I understand. Anyway, she's saying there's been a irrevocable breakdown. Would you agree?"

"Yes, I don't think I've seen her more than twenty days this year. I won't contest the divorce."

"We'll need to talk about finances, she's asking for sixty percent and the London house."

"That's a shame, I don't own it."

"Who does?"

"My daughter."

"I get the feeling you predicted this."

"Perhaps, but it was my financial adviser who suggested I could reduce my tax bill. All of the financial transactions are based on his recommendations."

"Richard, you have been crafty, but I hope it's safe."

"I wrote to Tara in Lausanne six months ago to let her know I was moving some property, stocks and shares to Tammy's trust fund. I sent it registered, but I doubt if she ever bothered to read it. Do you want a copy of that letter?"

"Please, plus the other documents you mentioned."

"I'll have my secretary collate them and send them round to you." Richard gave him the postal address and fax number of the McPhersons house before ringing off. He then called his secretary and brought her up-to-date before issuing instructions, one of which was to ask the CEO to call him.

The rest of the afternoon passed quietly, Alison was in her room, Elsie was reading and Richard used the PC in the study to get some work done. The CEO phoned after four and was told that Richard would be taking a week's leave, starting the following day, due to a family crisis. No further explanation was needed.

At five, Tammy was woken by Alison and sent into the shower. Tammy arrived downstairs just before six, Alison ensured she had a paracetamol then they all moved to the dining room.

After dinner, Tammy excused herself to check her emails. One was from the school giving instructions on how to access the intranet. The rest were mostly junk, information or commercial in origin. she spotted one from a fellow sixth former, John Hibbert.

Tom,
I missed you at rehearsals on Friday, the girl who's playing Anita was missing too. Anyway, see you at school on Monday.
John.

Tammy sent a quick reply.

John,
gone down with the flu. I'm staying with some friends, not sure yet when I'll be back.
Cheers, Tom

Tammy then went back to Amazon, Ebay and the other sites to change her address. She then realised that she didn't know the address of the house. Looking around the room she found some writing paper on the desk in front of her, the address was printed on each sheet. She finished updating the sites then thought about her bank statements, she should speak to her father about that.

By eight thirty she was fatigued but in need of a hot chocolate. She walked out of her door and almost straight into Alison.

"I was just coming to see you, to see if you were feeling okay; where are you going?"

"To get a hot chocolate."

"I'll sort that out, I see we need to give you an induction and tour of the house."

Tammy was sent back into her room, she was coming out of the bathroom having cleaned her face when there was a knock at the door. One of the staff delivered her hot chocolate then wished Tammy a good night. As the member of staff returned to the kitchen she saw Elsie heading for the study.

Fifteen minutes later the hot chocolate was finished and Tammy was fast asleep.

Tamara's Début   Part Ten   by Shiraz

 
Tuesday 25th November
  

Tammy was awake before seven on Tuesday and feeling considerably better, she virtually danced into the shower and was ready for the day well before eight. She made her way downstairs and was invited to take breakfast immediately. Tammy decided she needed energy and asked if the cook could make her a traditional cooked breakfast, she nibbled on a slice of toast while it was being cooked. Gradually the others appeared at the table, Michael was first.

"Good morning Tammy, how are you today?"

"I feel fine today, thanks for asking. What are your plans for the day?"

"College this morning then a free afternoon, do you fancy a run into town?"

"I don't know, I'll let you know after lunch." Tammy blushed slightly.

This little exchange was not missed by Elsie who had arrived in the doorway. They all concentrated on their breakfasts, Tammy felt she should have had something smaller but she had cleared her plate anyway. At eight-thirty Alison reminded Tammy of her appointment with Doctor Hoskins.

Tammy went upstairs and, after using the bathroom, applied her make-up and checked her hair. She rejoined Alison fifteen minutes later, ready for the outside world. Today Tammy had chosen jeans for a change.

The drive took just over ten minutes and they walked into the surgery with little time to spare. Tammy was called straight in by Dr Hoskins, Alison stayed with her.

"Hello again, you must be Tamara?"

"Tammy."

"Right, Tammy, and if I recall you are Miss McPherson?"

"That's right," said Alison.

"Now Tammy, how are you feeling?"

“Much better Doctor, thanks mainly to Alison and her sister."

"Now, whilst I am pretty certain that your issue over the weekend was due to a mild case of the flu with exhaustion for good measure, there is an anomaly that can't be ruled out."

Tammy and Alison looked at each other, unsure what was coming.

"I sent your blood to the pathology lab at the Dunbar and they have queried it, asking that I submit another sample."

"Why would they do that?" Asked Alison.

"They didn't say, but I'm to take another sample today and you're to see a specialist there on Thursday at ten."

"I have another appointment at ten."

"I'm sorry but the message I received was that they will need to see you as soon as this new sample had been processed, that means Thursday morning. Now, although I don't know what is going on, I'm going to assume it is serious, albeit not a dire emergency. Therefore I'm signing you off for a week with an undiagnosed haematological condition under investigation." He wrote out a sickness form from a tear-off pad.

"I'll need to get this to my school."

"Which school?"

"St Andrews"

"That's an all boys school."

"Yes, I'm in the sixth form."

Any implied confusion on the Doctor's face cleared away quickly. "Now, I'd like to give you a physical while you're here, please undress behind the screen. Would you like Miss McPherson to leave?"

"No, firstly she's seen me naked already, secondly she's a nurse at The London."

Tammy went behind the screen and changed into the gown that was hung there, she did have the feeling that the physical had been planned. Once ready she came out and sat on the examination bed. The doctor examined her without query until he eventually reached her bare genitalia.

"Hmmmm. Your testicles haven't dropped, when was your last physical?"

"About five or six years ago."

"Was nothing said then?"

"No."

"Do you shave here at all?"

"No, I was given a Brazilian last weekend by a torturer. It was in the interest of fashion, apparently."

Alison laughed out loud then said, "Joanne?" Tammy nodded.

"Right, get yourself dressed but leave your top off so I can take that blood sample."

The doctor inserted a cannula and took five vials of blood, Alison recognised this as a full blood screening but said nothing. While Tammy was putting her clothes back on, Alison started asking questions.

"Are you thinking there's a hormone issue?"

"It's possible but I'm not qualified to say."

"What else could it be?"

"There could be a physical cause, but I can't confirm nor rule out anything here, hence the referral."

"Who is Tammy due to see on Thursday?"

"A Doctor Helen Yates, I don't know the name so she must be newly qualified or from another area."

"Does Tammy need to do anything in the meantime?"

"No, how's her appetite?"

"It's returning, she ate a good breakfast."

"Have you discontinued the paracetamol?"

"Yes, I finished it after twenty-four hours, give or take an hour."

"Good."

Tammy had finished dressing and returned to her seat.

"I want you to make an appointment to see me next Tuesday."

"Yes Doctor."

Alison paused at the doorway. "Doctor, could the blood results be copied to us directly?"

"Why?"

"Tammy is seeing Professor Roberts from the Glasgow Royal Infirmary Gender Identity Clinic tomorrow evening and he might ask for bloods anyway?"

"I'll send them over if I have them back in time but they are for medical eyes only."

"Thank you."

After speaking to the receptionist they drove back to the house, Tammy walked inside while Alison parked the car.

She looked at the sick note she was named as Tamara Smart, this could be a problem. Her school, in particularly most of the staff, only knew Tom. The sickness certificate, as it is properly known, would have to be sent first to the school's admin office followed by the school nurse. They were all bound to ask questions and generate gossip. Tammy needed a coffee but still didn't know how to get one, however she was intercepted in the hallway by Thomas.

"Mrs McPherson asked that you see her in the study when you return., Miss Smart. Would you like anything?"

"A coffee please Thomas."

Tammy knocked then pushed the study door open. She found Elsie, the school's chaplin and another man.

"Come in Tammy, sit down."

Tammy did as asked, but was not comfortable, Elsie saw this but before anything was said there was a knock at the door and Thomas entered with Tammy's coffee.

"Now Tammy, you know Reverend Franklin and this is Mr Davison, he's the Chairman of the Governing Body. The Reverend is also a governor and you already know that I am one. We've been discussing your issue but I'd like these gentlemen to hear your opinion."

"Can I have an understanding that anything you hear in this room goes no further without my express permission?" Tammy was being quite serious.

The three nodded.

"Would it be useful if I gave you a summary, then you can ask questions?"

Again the three agreed.

"Firstly, my legal name is now Tamara Smart but I prefer to be called Tammy. Secondly the person you can see here is my true self, I've just been hiding myself for the past eighteen years, or past ten years at the school. Thirdly I want to finish my education. Fourth I'm under a GP who has signed me off for a week starting today." Tammy handed the sick note to Elsie.

She continued,"Fifth as of this morning I am now under two consultants at the Dunbar, I'll be seeing a third here tomorrow. Sixth It's time St Andrews joined the rest of the twenty-first century and admitted girls."

The two men sat stunned, Elsie had heard all this before, just not as forcibly. Tammy waited for one of them to speak. The chaplain was first.

"My, my, how very forthright young, er, lady. I believe you have been taught well, what is your preferred profession?"

"International business."

"Yes, you will be very suited, isn't the phrase 'take no prisoners' very appropriate for your approach. I think the issue is not how you will continue to fit the school, more how will the school fit you? There never has been a female student, but if you'll excuse an impertinent question, you're not strictly female?"

Elsie decided to protect Tammy. "Perhaps not Reverend, but we have received this letter, signed by Harry's daughter. I'll read it."

To whom it may concern.
 
Tamara Smart age 18
 
It is my opinion that Tammy Smart is sane and is likely to be diagnosed as transgendered when she has been able to see a specialist in this field, she will then gain the appropriate protection under discrimination and diversity legislation. I further believe that Tammy's mental health will suffer if she is forced to revert to acting as a male and as such I fully support her.
 
In view of this I have arranged for her to see a leading expert in gender identity within a few days.
 
Yours faithfully
 
Dr Jill Davison

Harry smiled, "she's a clever one."

"She's your daughter, Harry, I hope you haven't just realised that." Elsie was a little smug.

"Let me get this right, she supports you and isn't saying that you're mentally ill, but that you need to do this in order to avoid mental health problems, however she can't give a full diagnosis either, so you're not yet legally female. Where does this leave the school?" The Reverend was trying to find a workable solution, and struggling.

"Obviously I like what she's written, but she's my daughter so I have to declare an interest." Harry sat back.

"Do I get to say something now?" Tammy looked around the three chairs and asked Elsie for the letter, quickly reading it for herself.

"I know this letter doesn't give an absolute answer to the questions, but isn't religion like that?" She looked directly at the chaplain. "This is an indicator of what's to come, the reason that Dr Davison can't give an authoritative answer is that she is not qualified to do so, that's why I'm seeing a Professor from Glasgow Royal Infirmary tomorrow. Dr Davison is however qualified to comment on my mental health, which is excellent by the way. There may be another medical issue brewing, Dr Hoskins has referred me to the Dunbar and I'll know more on Thursday."

"Gentlemen, I think you'll find that Tammy is nothing like the quiet schoolboy who preceded her. I knew that schoolboy and I'm so pleased he has matured into the young lady in front of you. I know it will take some talking to convince a few of the other governors, but I'd like to think you can support me in allowing Tammy to complete her education. Obviously, we wouldn't like to consider the alternative, would we?"

Harry looked blankly at Elsie. "Tammy, tell them."

"I believe you know my father and his occupation? I can easily afford a few solicitors." Tammy smiled sweetly.

"Is that a threat Miss Smart?"

"No Reverend, an observation."

"Tammy, would you care to join your father in the conservatory?"

Tammy left the study, aware that she'd just stirred a hornets' nest. Now it was down to Elsie. Back in the study Elsie had one last word on the subject, "She's good isn't she, must be her education?"

Then the conversation turned to the problem with the catering manager. Jonathan Franklin asked, "did Steven persuade him to keep quiet?"

"No, and it seems that Caithness Council are going to prosecute the school for the kitchen problem unless we can convince them otherwise. That means being seen to take severe action."

"Harry, it sounds like you've made up your mind."

"Yes Jonathan, but it is Steven who employed him so it has to be Steven who makes the decision. No doubt he'll ask for your support."

"Harry, I can give moral support but I don't like getting involved in the hiring and firing department. How else can I remain holier than thou?"

Elsie laughed at that, she'd known Jonathan Franklin since he arrived at the school as a very green newly qualified Anglican vicar. The school also had a Church of Scotland minister but, given the number of English boys, had enlisted Rev Franklin to cater for them.

"Harry, when are you planning on calling a full governors' meeting?"

"Friday morning at ten, I feel it will last most of the day so the school will provide lunch."

"Friday it is then, shouldn't I bring sandwiches?"

"How very droll Elsie. Can you organise an agenda and circulate it?"

"I'll get that done this morning, I'd appreciate it if you'll start phoning all of them, they don't all check their emails and a bit of a prod might be useful."

"Right. Jonathan, could you see if you can speak to John McPherson?"

"If you insist, Harry"

"I do."

The meeting finished but Elsie remained in the study to prepare an agenda which she emailed to each governor. She then sent the sick certificate to the Head's personal fax machine. That would have to handled delicately, the number of people who knew about Tammy was growing by the minute. Her phone started ringing two minutes later, apparently half of them did check their emails after all.

Meanwhile Tammy was speaking with her father. "I don't know what this means."

"Neither do I but you're seeing a specialist on Wednesday and another on Thursday. By the end of this week you'll have a better idea. By the way, the school delivered your text books, folders and some coursework. They also saw fit to send your clothes, I'm not certain there's anything left in your room. Your male clothes have been put in storage, everything else is in your room."

"I should have expected them to empty my room, after all I can't stay there any more, can I? Only thing is, how do I get books from the school library?"

"I hadn't have thought so, can you access the library index from your laptop?"

"Yes, so perhaps I can order a book, can you call the school and set that up for me? I have real difficulty calling myself Tom for the sake of others."

"I'll sort that out, why don't you do some coursework until lunchtime."

"Right, I could do with some water but I don't know how to get that, where's the kitchen?"

"It's that small door off the hallway, on the left, but just pick up one of the phones and dial 20."

Tammy went up to her room and ordered a jug of water before settling in front of the writing table. She had several ongoing projects that needed periodic review and concentrated on these. She came back down when Elsie rang to tell her about lunch but went back up afterwards.

Richard checked on her then said he was going into town. His first stop was the local newspaper office. The editor, Sharon Pike, had called the McPherson house that morning and asked about Tammy. Richard elected to go and see her personally.

"Hello Mr Smart."

"Good afternoon, now can you tell me about this story?"

"Yes, we've been informed that one of the pupils at St Andrews, namely your son, is pretending to be a girl so he can solicit men in the town."

"Your source would be John McPherson then."

"I'm afraid I can't confirm that."

"Don't worry, I don't need confirmation. I believe that the point of this allegation is to shame everyone else for John's own mistake. I had hoped that we could talk to him and rescue his career but I see that's not going to be possible. I will not allow my daughter to become fodder for your paper and I want an assurance that you won't print this story."

"I can't give you that assurance, this is in the public interest."

"That's rubbish and you know it. I could give you the counter story but that would not do any good for my daughter either. I could also tell you things about John McPherson, but I choose not to."

"I'm sure that if there is a story we'll find it."

"Even if it's not true, perhaps?"

Richard left the newspaper office with one of the editor's business cards. He then made a call to his solicitor.

"I want an injunction against the Thurso Echo this afternoon."

"For what reason?"

"The paper is about to print lies about my daughter. This would affect her schooling and her mental health, she is under a psychologist and is due to see an eminent psychiatrist tomorrow. I also want John McPherson of 28a Upper Street Thurso on the injunction. I suggest we also name the local TV stations and radio station."

"I'll see what I can do, but as it's Scotland I'll have to bring in a colleague in Edinburgh."

"Do what you need to do."

"I will."

Richard then went to the bank, he encountered Jeremy in the foyer.

"Can I help you?"

"Yes, I'd like to see Mr Doherty, the manager."

"I'm afraid he doesn't see anyone without an appointment."

"Can you tell him that Mr Smart wishes to see him."

"I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"It's branch policy."

"Never mind, I'll find his office myself."

"Where are you going?"

Richard walked up to the locked door and slid his pass into the reader, he opened the door and walked down the corridor. He reached the manager's door as two members of staff appeared behind him.

"Who are you and how did you get in?"

Richard turned and showed his staff pass. He then turned again and walked into the manager's office."

"Good afternoon Mr Doherty. I'm Richard Smart."

"Are you the cause of the security alert?"

"Yes, and I'm afraid I'm going to ask you to suspend that Jeremy out there. If he's a customer adviser then it would be useful if he gave advice instead of saying 'no' all the time. My daughter had the same trouble."

"I'll speak to him, now what causes you to effectively break into my office?"

"I'd like to thank you personally for helping my daughter last week."

"You could have done that over the phone."

"I could, but then I would like something else while I'm in Thurso."

"Like what?"

"Can you bring up an account for John McPherson of 28a Upper Street Thurso?"

The manager typed a search into his terminal before turning back to Richard. "Yes, I've found him."

"What's the state of the account?"

"£215 overdrawn."

"He's about to be sacked from his job, so I suggest you call him in for a chat and cancel his overdraft facility."

"How do you know he's about to be sacked?"

"He's being named by Caithness Council Environmental Health as responsible for the food poisoning at St Andrews just over a week ago. The report will be released this afternoon, his dismissal will be enacted tomorrow morning."

"I see. Now, this is rather unorthodox but you are certain about this information? What is your source?"

"His employer."

"I see, I believe his account is actually overdue for review, he's missed the last two appointments. I will reduce his overdraft to £100 and write to him this afternoon, he can see my assistant on Friday as he'll probably be free then. He won't be able to use his debit card anywhere until he comes to see us."

"That will do nicely, thank you."

"Thank you Mr Smart, but please ring first in the future. I will deal with Jeremy personally, perhaps some refresher training is needed."

"Perhaps."

Richard left the managers office and let himself into the foyer, Jeremy was gone. He took some cash out of the ATM there then walked the short distance to Sarah's shop.

"Hello Sarah."

"Hello Richard, how's Tammy?"

"She's fine, but Dr Hoskins has signed her off for a week."

"Does that mean she won't be able to work on Saturday?"

"I think that very much depends on Tammy, but I won't stop her."

"Thank you, you won't believe how many people have been asking after her this morning."

"I know she is very popular already."

"More than you could imagine. Now, is there anything I can help you with?"

"I'd like to buy Tammy a nice skirt and a top, you know what she wears."

Sarah and Richard spent twenty minutes looking through the rails for something that Tammy would like. As Richard was stood at the counter paying for it a lady walked in and spoke to Sarah."

"How is Tammy, I understand she's not well and went to see the doctor this morning."

"She's just taking it easy for a few days. I hope she'll be back on Saturday. This is her father. Richard, this is Sandy, Tammy's hairdresser."

"Please to meet you Sandy."

"And you Mr ...?"

"Smart."

"Not Bonney?"

"No."

Sarah started laughing then stopped herself, Richard caught up with what was going on.

"Sandy, could you fit Tammy in on Friday?"

"Yes, I'm free at two."

"Right, I'll bring her down then." He picked up the bag containing Tammy's new clothes and said his goodbyes, leaving the two women talking.

He walked back to his car and drove the few miles to the house. He climbed out of his car as his phone rang.

"Mr Smart?"

"Yes. Who is this?"

"Hello, I'm Jeremiah Smith of Smith, Smith and Smith. I'm at the High Court in Edinburgh but I'd like a little background information before I see the High Sheriff."

"Okay, fire away."

"What is your son's legal name?"

"Tamara Smart. She is my daughter."

"When was her name changed?"

"Last Monday."

"What is her medical status?"

"Physically male but under a psychologist who has said that it is in her interests to remain female. She is seeing Professor Roberts from Glasgow Royal Infirmary tomorrow and a further consultant on Thursday. She's currently signed off by her GP."

"What about this accusation?"

"She was not attracted to him one bit but she was frightened to tell him the truth as he was an employee at her school. She was due to tell him on Sunday to stop bothering her but she fell ill. He only met her on Friday night."

"Is there anything else?"

"Mr McPherson is about to be sacked by his employers, St Andrews School, for gross misconduct, he is however bound by a non disclosure agreement. He has, though, already spoken to one newspaper and may attempt to speak to the rest of the press."

"I'll speak to the High Sheriff in chambers in a few minutes. Can I call you back?"

"Certainly."

Richard walked in and took the bag up to Tammy's room, she didn't hear the door open, her head was in a text book.

"Hello Tammy."

"Dad!"

"I've got something for you." He gave her the bag.

"Thank you daddy!" She threw her arms around him and gave him a kiss. He wondered for a minute if anyone would doubt that Tammy was a girl, if they'd have seen that reaction.

"Give yourself a break, come downstairs for a minute."

They walked into the sitting room, Richard put his head in the study and found Elsie, he signalled for her to join them. He then knocked on the kitchen door and asked for coffee and biscuits. Elsie followed him into the sitting room.

"Tammy, both Elsie and myself have been working on your behalf today. Elsie, do you want to go first?"

"You have the support of the Chairman of the governing body and the school chaplain, both of whom you met this morning. Since then I've spoken to six of the other governors. Four of the rest are parent governors and can't make Friday's meeting due to the short notice."

She paused as the coffee and biscuits were carried in.

"So far as the other problem is concerned, John is being seen by the Headmaster and Harry Davison tomorrow, when he'll be sacked. Although there is a non disclosure agreement, how well he observes it is another problem."

Richard took over, "we had a call from the newspaper, apparently he's told them you were soliciting."

"He can't!"

"Unfortunately we can't gag him, not physically, but I've instructed my solicitor to obtain a injunction to stop the paper printing the story and to stop him spreading the story elsewhere."

"Will that work?"

"If it doesn't then he'll be in contempt of court. Elsie, I've also given him a small banking problem."

"It's probably best if I don't know about that."

They sat and drank their coffee.

At the same time, John McPherson was filling his car with fuel. He went to pay with his card, which was refused. Fortunately he knew he had just enough cash to pay for the petrol and assumed it was a temporary fault.

He was parking outside his flat at the same time as Richard Smart's mobile rang.

"Hello?"

"Hello Mr Smart, this is Jeremiah Smith."

"Hello Mr Smith, do you have some news for me?"

"Yes, a temporary injunction has been granted until next Monday. He will only consider extending the injunction if a full hearing is arranged. What do you want me to do?"

"Can you firstly fax the court order to this number," he read out Elsie's fax number, "then book a hearing. We'll have the paperwork ready by Friday lunchtime."

"I'll book that now Mr Smart."

Richard suggested that Tammy went back to her coursework then went to the study to await the court order; he didn't have to wait long. Richard went back to his car with two copies of the fax and drove into town, firstly he went to see Sharon Pike at the newspaper.

"Ms Pike, I'm afraid you won't be able to print that story." He handed over the injunction.

"That was fast, just who are you exactly?"

"A concerned parent."

"This runs out on Monday, there's always next week's paper."

"I doubt that."

He next drove to John's flat, Richard pressed the buzzer, saying 'delivery' into the microphone, then activated the voice recorder on his phone. John came down shortly afterwards.

"Oh, it's you. Come to pay me off?"

"No, but I'm afraid you won't be seeing your story anywhere. This is an injunction." Richard handed over a copy.

"This won't stop me."

"I suggest you read it fully."

John looked at the first sheet, uttered a crude Anglo-Saxon word, then went indoors, slamming the door. Richard went back to his borrowed car then stopped the recording, out of sight of the flat.

Back at the house he washed and went down for dinner, Tammy joined him and was now wearing her new clothes. A few hours later Tammy was in bed asleep and Richard was finished for the day, having faxed the injunction to the BBC, Scottish TV and an independent radio station. It did no harm to be careful.

 
Wednesday 26th November
 

On Wednesday morning Tammy continued with her coursework until lunch then picked up her West Side Story script and read her part for several hours. Alison popped in to tell Tammy she would return to London, via Glasgow, in the morning using the same helicopter flight as the Professor.

In the study Elsie continued her campaigning on Tammy's behalf, whilst at the school John McPherson was served with his dismissal notice and a copy of the Council report.

When he arrived home he found a letter from his bank and a court summons obtained by the Council. He didn't bother to speak to the newspaper as he knew Richard had been there, so he called the local radio station instead. As soon as he told the newsroom about the story he was told not to call again, John’s world was collapsing around him.

Tammy was finishing another read-through when she heard the chopper touch down, looking at the clock she saw it was just before five.

Tamara's Début   Part Eleven   by Shiraz

 
Wednesday 26th November Continued
 

Tammy walked out of her room and stopped halfway down the stairs, gripping the handrail for security. Thomas was stood at the front door with Elsie and Richard just inside. The Professor walked in with his wife directly behind, one of the staff followed with their bags.

Professor Roberts was a small man but made up for that with a broad smile. Tammy instantly knew she would get along with him. Elsie introduced those present.

"Professor, I'm Elsie McPherson. It is so kind of you to agree to come at such short notice."

"Mrs McPherson, how could I refuse such an offer? I love the Highlands but I seldom escape from Glasgow."

"Please call me Elsie. This is Richard Smart, Tammy's father."

"Please to meet you, and please call me Julian." He placed emphasis on the last letter. "I'd like to introduce my wife, Wendy."

The introductions went round once more, as Tammy finally made her way down the stairs. She was dressed in the skirt her father had bought her the day before, paired with a blouse. Whilst changing, Tammy had looked into her wardrobe and knew she had to buy some more clothes, soon.

"Julian, I'd like to introduce my daughter, Tamara Smart, although she prefers Tammy."

"Enchantée Mademoiselle." He reached for Tammy's hand and kissed it, she blushed.

Elsie escorted them to the sitting room for tea but then suggested Julian and Tammy have a chat in the study. Richard rose to accompany Tammy but she waved him back down.

"Professor, thank you for coming to see me."

"Tammy, it's Julian and I don't mind at all. I'm a little confused, I wasn't expecting a genetic female. Please tell me you're not my patient."

Tammy giggled, "Of course I'm the reason you're here, isn't it obvious?"

"Not at all. How long have you been full-time?"

"Ten days."

"You jest."

"No, what you see is what you get."

That earned her a laugh.

"Now, I've had some background information from Dr Davison but I'd like to hear your story in your own words."

Tammy started to explain her long-held desire to be female, her experiences in the shop, the play, the wedding and the past few days, the Professor listened politely and diligently whilst she spoke, making notes. Tammy had been speaking for nearly ten minutes before she told him about the few negative reaction she'd received including her issues with John McPherson.

"Is he related to Elsie McPherson?"

"Yes, he's her eldest son."

"I take it he troubles you?"

"Yes, especially as I feel I'm not ready for exposure."

"If not now, when? Everyone in this house must know, including the staff. All the governors of your school as well, not to mention a few functionaries and health service personnel. You haven't exactly been in hiding."

"No, I suppose not, it's just the way he wants to get at me."

Tammy uncrossed then recrossed her legs, after smoothing her long skirt. Professor Roberts watched her mannerisms carefully. He posed the next question carefully.

"So, lets assume Tammy becomes a media spectacle because of this John and the whole town knows Tammy is a boy, but I bet virtually none of them will have known Tom Smart. You could return to school as Tom and return to anonymity?"

"No, I wouldn't do it, I couldn't do it."

"Why not?"

"I'm fed up living the lie. I know there will be problems ahead but I think I'm strong enough to deal with most of them. Right now I only have one real issue and he is actually being dealt with."

"You come across as very confident. If that's the hard shell, what about the soft centre?"

"It's there, please ask the rest of the people in this house. What I don't do is turn on the tears to order."

"So what are your aims?"

"Crystal ball time? Firstly I want to finish my education, then decide if I'm going to University or taking a gap year."

"No, what of your aim to be Tammy?"

"Those are Tammy's aims, I have no aim or aspiration to be Tammy, I am Tammy. Tom won't be doing those things, Tom left over a week ago."

"He didn't die then?"

"No, he left, but I have all of his memories; he is a part of the whole me, he just wasn't the true me."

Tammy was starting to cry gently now.

Sitting on the table in front of the Professor was an envelope marked for his attention. He had been so fixed on Tammy, who was now drying her eyes, that he hadn't spotted it until now. He opened the envelope and pulled out a few sheets of paper, with a brief covering note.

"Tammy, according to these blood results, your hormones are out of balance. I can see that you are due to see Helen Yates tomorrow and she will deal with the physical. However, I have to consider if all this is due simply to your body chemistry."

"No! No! No!" Tammy really was crying now. Julian went to the door and opened it, calling for Elsie to comfort her, he explained quickly that he had to get a genuine emotional response from her. As Elsie led the sobbing Tammy from the study, Julian asked Richard to speak to him in the same room.

"Richard, firstly I am struck with how natural Tammy appears."

"Yes, she has that effect on people."

"How long have you known about Tammy?"

"Just over a week, but I only met her on Sunday for the first time."

"You had no idea before?"

"I don't suppose I did, Tom was always quiet, almost withdrawn, but had an analytical mind that more than made up for his shyness. Looking back, however, I can see the signs are there."

"How did you take the change?"

"Tammy told me herself so I was prepared for what I found, someone had come along and replaced my quiet son with a vivacious young lady, my daughter. I'm just pleased that she's happy especially considering the divorce."

"Divorce?"

"Yes, I found out a week ago, we told Tammy on Monday."

"So she couldn't have known about this before she disposed of Tom as an identity?"

"No, and she dealt with her mother very effectively a few days ago. How her mother will cope with having a daughter is another matter but I'll protect Tammy to the best of my abilities. I'm not sure about your use of the word 'disposed', you make it sound like concrete boots in Loch Ness. I prefer to think it as metamorphosis, from the caterpillar to the butterfly."

"Very elegant Richard. Thank you."

They both walked to the sitting room where Julian apologised to Tammy. Wendy, not being used to meeting her husband's patients, chastised him for upsetting 'this poor girl'.

"Mrs Roberts, it's not a problem. Your husband just asked me a very difficult question and I couldn't help myself. He was a perfect gentleman."

"Tammy, I'm relieved, you just don't know how much trouble he would be in otherwise. Please call me Wendy."

Wendy was interested in Tammy's experience in the boutique and Tammy in turn suggested some styles and colours that might work, which Wendy hadn't tried before. Elsie chipped in and the three were talking at such a rate that Julian and Richard slid to the far side of the room.

"Richard, if I didn't know?"

"Julian, my take exactly."

"There are some questions with the bloodwork, but she's seeing Helen Yates tomorrow and I really don't think it's an underlying cause, nor a side effect, merely an adjunct. I will of course, defer to those with greater knowledge in that field than myself, and Helen is one of the best."

Thomas appeared at six o'clock and called them to dinner. The dinner table banter was lively with Michael and Alison joining them after a few minutes. At six thirty the phone rang, Elsie excused herself from the table, returning a couple of minutes later. She walked up to Tammy and whispered in her ear.

"The theatre just called. They asked if you could get there this evening as they haven't seen you for a week. I explained that you'd just recovered from the 'flu but Mr Brown was quite insistent."

"That's okay, I'll go and see them. I'll need transport though."

Richard overhead part of the conversation and offered to take her to the theatre. Wendy, hearing Richard asked if she could go as well. Tammy wasn't quite sure what to make of it, after all she'd been there on her own up till now. her father was now organising the transport and Tammy just felt she was being carried along. This time though, it didn’t matter.

She ran upstairs to tidy her make-up and pull on a cardigan, back downstairs her father held a coat open for her. A few minutes later the two of them, plus Wendy Roberts were on their way into town. Wendy explained that she always had a soft spot for community theatre.

Fifteen minutes later, just on seven o'clock they pulled into the car-park and walked into The Mill Theatre. Tammy was welcomed by Iain Brown, the Director, and then introduced him to her father. Wendy was introduced as a house guest, Tammy asked if they could observe the rehearsal as her father was providing her transport. Iain agreed, so long as they kept quiet.

The main cast was brought together. "Everyone, I'm glad you could all finally make it tonight. Please be here fifteen minutes earlier so we can make a prompt start. When we start costume rehearsals you will need that fifteen minutes so get used to it now."

There were mutterings about missing dinners but no real dissent. "I hope you all had time to read your scripts, you not only need to know your own lines, you need to know everyone else's. How else will you know when to speak?"

There was a chuckle from a few of the cast, then they got down to the serious business. Iain had them do a walk through from the top, less the songs. He insisted they did it in character and, as far as possible, without scripts. Only Tammy and the girl playing Maria had completely committed the script to memory, putting much of the cast to shame.

They took a break after an hour. 'Maria' walked over. Tanya felt she knew Tammy but couldn't place her.

"Hi, I'm Tanya. We didn't get a chance to speak last week and the director said you weren't well on Friday."

"Hi Tanya, I'm Tammy. Have I seen you in town?"

"Maybe, I work in the bakery on a Saturday."

"I come in to buy our cakes for Sarah's Boutique every Saturday morning."

"That'll be where I know you."

"Girls?" That came from Sandy Franklin, the musical director, "can you come over here please."

They did a run through with a couple of songs while the rest of the cast rehearsed the gang scenes. By nine they were pushed but Iain wanted the first two scenes repeated with the whole cast. Tammy saw John Hibbert looking in her direction a few times but maybe he was too scared to say anything to her face. They finally got out at nine thirty.

It was cold when they made their way across the carpark, nobody said anything until Richard had pulled the car across the bridge and onto the A9.

"You're going to have a great production, for a small theatre."

"Thanks Wendy." Tammy was tired and not up for long conversations.

"Seriously, I'm going to have to come back for the show."

"I'm certain that can be arranged, Wendy." Richard spoke as he dropped a gear to take on the long hill.

They arrived at the house a little over ten minutes later, Richard dropped Tammy and Wendy at the front door then went towards the stables to park. There weren't any horses in the stables any more, none of Elsie's three offspring had shown much interest.

Tammy asked for a hot chocolate and went straight to her room. She was asleep before the mug arrived outside her door, the member of staff, not getting a response, returned to the kitchen.

Julian had been working in the study whilst the others had been at the theatre. He now had his preliminary report typed and saved. He knew that there was little male persona in Tammy but he felt he could not make a definitive decision that she was transgendered after just the one session. His report would reflect this and he left a sealed copy for Tammy with her father, whom he found in the sitting room.

"Richard, I'm afraid that I can't give you a copy of my report. Whilst Tammy is your daughter, she is over eighteen, it has to be her own decision whether you see it."

"Julian, I fully understand and I would probably have issues if it were any other way."

"Thank you, in my profession ethics are paramount. If you don't mind me asking, what is your profession?"

"I'm the international director for a major bank, although I'm starting to question that career. I haven't been as good a father as I could for Tammy, or Tommy before, and I want to make amends."

"I think anyone in Tammy's position would appreciate a parent who cares so much. Too many families walk away from transgendered individuals and leave them without emotional support when they need it the most, abuse can easily follow whether it is from a third party or self-induced."

"I'm plainly new to this but Tammy is all I have right now, although perhaps I'm being a little selfish in that regard. I will do anything in my power to protect her."

"Including legal action?"

"Yes."

"She has to be aware of the real world, it can be a challenge for any teenager, especially someone in Tammy's position."

"She has worked with me at the bank and is aware that life is not always fair, but she doesn't have enough experience in the real world due to so many years in boarding school, again that's my fault. What she doesn't need, however, is bigots like John McPherson. She will have a tough time going back to school but she has to do that herself, I'm not going to be in the school every day, although I doubt I'll be far away."

"If you don't mind, I'm going up to bed. Wendy went up a short while ago."

"Good night Julian, and thank you."

"My pleasure."

Elsie had been sat the far side of the sitting room during this exchange and was smiling to herself from behind a novel.
 
 
Thursday 27th November
 
Thursday morning was a rush. Alison had packed her bag before breakfast and was waiting at the front door by eight thirty as the helicopter touched down beside the house. Julian and Wendy Roberts came down from their bedroom and met Tammy in the hallway. Tammy was holding her copy of the report but hadn't opened it as yet.

"Tammy, I'd like to see you again in two weeks, can you come to Glasgow and see me in my rooms there? I'll have my secretary contact you with the details."

"I'll assume for the moment I won't be back at school by then so it wouldn't be a problem."

"If you are back at school let my secretary know and I'll write to your headmaster."

"Thank you."

Julian shook Tammy's hand and Wendy gave her a kiss on the cheek. Alison was the next in line, giving Tammy a hug and a kiss on both cheeks.

"Tammy, I wish I could stay but I have to get back, if only to see what mess Andrea has made of our flat!"

"Alison, you have been wonderful to me. I'm going to miss you." Tammy started crying, Alison wrapped her arms around Tammy and whispered in her ear.

"Tammy, I'll call you later so you can tell me about your hospital appointment, but will you do one thing for me?"

"What?"

"Stop crying so you don't have to redo your mascara." That had the desired effect as Tammy giggled.

One more kiss then Alison followed the Roberts out of the door, turning to wave as she walked out onto the steps. Richard had been watching from a discrete distance and now walked up to Tammy.

"Do you want to read that letter before we go to the hospital?"

"Yes, can I use the study?"

"Of course, although it's not me you should be asking."

Tammy pushed the door open and found the room clear. She sat at the desk and opened the envelope carefully, pulling the single sheet out. One of Professor Robert's business cards dropped out at the same time. Tammy read through quickly then went back to the start to digest the letter fully.

Private and Confidential
 
To Whom it may concern
 
Tamara Smart 01.09.1996
 
I examined Miss Tamara Smart on the 25th of November 2014. She explained that she had been living full-time as a female for eleven days prior to this first session and that she had changed her name by Statutory Declaration three days later. She also told me of long-felt aspiration to be female but her schooling, a private boys' boarding school, had until now prevented this.
 
Her decision to become Tamara (Tammy) fulltime appears to have been an accident or at the least the result of an odd set of circumstances precipitated by a close friend and a temporary closure of her school. The few days that followed appear to have sealed her decision to forgo her previous male existence.
 
I was struck by Tammy's confidence from the moment I met her, this is very unusual in someone who has only recently fully adopted their female persona and it is this confidence that gives me some cause for concern. Any overconfidence is tempered, however, with a vulnerability that should keep her from making rash decisions.
 
I support Dr Jill Davison's view that it would be damaging to Tammy's mental health if she were forced to revert to a male persona, not withstanding the unstated requirement that she would have to undertake another Statutory Declaration to change her name. As such I fully agree that she should continue her schooling as a female.
 
I am minded to accept that Tammy is transgendered but I feel it is too soon for a full, formal, diagnosis. I will be seeing her again in two weeks.
 
Yours faithfully
 
Professor J Roberts

Tammy started to cry for the second time that morning, she felt she was one step closer to full legal acceptance. She walked to the door, dabbing her eyes with a tissue, this time her mascara had run. She called her father into the study, handing him the letter as he walked in. The pair sat in the armchairs and Richard read the brief report, knowing that the Professor's own notes would be much more detailed.

"Tammy, I know that this letter doesn't give you the legal protection that will help you move things forward, but every letter of support is added ammunition. There's a governor's meeting tomorrow morning, we need to draft something for them but I want to know if you're happy for them to see this letter?"

"Yes, they need to see it. I need to take a copy to the hospital too, for Jill."

"What's happened to your appointment with her?"

"I don't know."

"We'll find out when we get to the hospital, be ready to leave at nine thirty."

"Okay, I'll make a couple of copies of this letter. Can we stop in the town when we've finished at the hospital, I want to get a folder and some plastic wallets, I have a feeling there'll be quite a few more letters."

"Sensible approach, as ever."

"When are we going to tell mum?" Tammy's positive expression changed suddenly as she asked the question.

"Why don't we wait until you've seen Drs Yates and Davison, we'll have a better idea. I get the feeling it might be better to write to her first and let her make the next move. That way we can control what she sees and can't argue about the content."

"Now it's your turn to be sensible." They both started laughing, applying a business approach to a set of personal circumstances was typical of Richard, but he had a soft side too. This time however, he needed to deal with Tara very carefully and an argument on the phone was not an approach that would be advisable.

Tammy went up to her room and ordered a coffee. She started drafting a letter to the governors, then deleted the file, unhappy with the way it sounded. Now was not a good time to try and put anything on paper, she could wait until later in the day. She accessed her emails for the first time in several days and deleted the spam. She realised that her current email address was for Tom but she needed an account for Tammy. She accessed Gmail and created a new address, she'd talk to her father later about a new address on the family domain name, which he controlled. She wondered, as an aside, how long her mum would be able to use her own existing email address.

One email was from John Hibbert, sent late the previous evening.

Tom,
 
I'm hearing some strange rumours about you and I want to know you're alright. We've been friends since the first day many years ago and I want you to know you can confide in me. By the way, are you still in Thurso?
 
Anyway, I saw that girl at the theatre tonight but didn't get to speak to her, no sign of you though. Hope you're getting better.
 
John

Tammy sighed, she knew that it would probably come to this. She had known John Hibbert for a long time, but John had known Tom not Tammy, now he'd have to meet Tammy.

John,
 
I'm not sure what the rumours are but many things are happening in my life right now, including my parents divorcing. I'm over the flu but my GP in the town has signed me off until next week. I have a couple of appointments at The Dunbar hospital this morning when I should know a bit more about my health. It's not contagious by the way, at least I don't think so!
 
Yes I am still in Thurso, or just outside, I'm staying with one of my father's friends and her family. I'll see you on Friday night, I promise, then we can talk.
 
Cheers, T.

Tammy couldn't sign herself as Tom but didn't think it was right to sign it as Tammy either, not yet. She'd have to come clean to John Hibbert the following night at the theatre, it wasn't fair on him otherwise. At least that would be after the governors' meeting which would decide Tammy's future at the school, she presumed.

She heard a ping and saw a reply from John, he obviously must have been working on his PC.

Tom,
 
sorry to hear about your folks, you don't need that at the same time as health problems. I'll see you tomorrow.
 
John

Tammy went to her bathroom and cleaned off her make-up, re-applying the minimum she was comfortable with, understatement being the order of the day.

She was back downstairs a few minutes after the specified time, fashionably late.

"Tammy, I said nine thirty, what have you been doing?"

"Just getting ready."

"Have you remembered the letter?"

That sent Tammy running back up the stairs to retrieve a copy from the writing table. Richard, meanwhile went out to the car to find a thick frost, he cursed himself for not checking earlier. It was nearly ten minutes later when they pulled out of the driveway.

It was ten o'clock when they pulled into the car-park at The Dunbar Hospital, some distance from the out patients department. They were now late, Richard remembered that Tom had never been late for anything.

Of course, hospitals are always the same. Even if you're late for the appointment, you still have to wait for ten minutes before being called in. Tammy was starting to shuffle her feet, mostly to maintain circulation in the draughty waiting room, the call from the examining room doorway caught her unaware. Richard grabbed his daughters hand and pulled her across to the door.

"Tammy, do you want me to come in with you?"

"Yes please dad."

Dr Yates welcomed them and asked the pair to sit down at her desk. Tammy introduced her father.

"Miss Smart, Mr Smart, thank you for seeing me at such short notice. I was however originally expecting a Tom Smart but fortunately Dr Hoskins sent a note on Tuesday explaining some changes in your life."

Tammy looked at her father before speaking, "Dr Yates, I understand that you arranged this referral at short notice but can you please tell us what is going on, and what your speciality is."

"Can I answer those in reverse order? I am an Endocrinologist, that is to say that I specialise in hormones. You are here because of the blood taken from you on Sunday showed unusual hormone levels for an eighteen year old male."

Tammy cringed when she heard the last word. Richard picked up the conversation, "such as?"

"Tammy's testosterone and oestrogen levels are both well below what is normal for either male or female late teens."

"So what am I?"

"According to Dr Hoskins your body is male, at least on the outside. However, you do not appear to have been through puberty as yet. We have several options available but I'd like to know more about your current status."

"I have copies of two letters with me, one from Dr Jill Davison of this hospital and one from Professor Julian Roberts of Glasgow Royal Infirmary," she handed over the letters.

Dr Yates quickly read them both, "I see. Initially I thought I would simply be dealing with a hormone issue but can now see that a referral from Professor Roberts would not have been far away, he sends his Caithness area transgender referrals to me for monitoring."

"So what can you do for me now?"

"Normally I would give you a course of testosterone to kick-start male puberty but I can see you would not accept that."

"That's correct."

"My alternative would be to give you a course of oestrogen, but I can't give that to a male patient normally without a formal diagnosis of gender dysphoria."

"You say normally?"

"Yes, but right now I can't take either option without a definitive recommendation from Professor Roberts. When are you due to see him next?"

"Two weeks."

"That delay won't be an immediate problem but I need to act within three months, preferrably one."

"Why?"

"Your hormone levels are too low for your general health and skeletal development. You could have brittle bones if this is left untreated."

"So what can we do?"

"I will write to Professor Roberts and explain my dilemma, but in the meantime I want a CT scan done of your abdomen, I would have already arranged for you to have that done here, today, but there still isn't a scanner on site, despite multiple promises by the Hospital Trust. I've asked for an urgent referral to another unit for the scan instead. I'll see you here again in three weeks, by which time I'll have some more answers."

They shook and walked out into the waiting area, unsure what to do next. Jill was waiting for them and pulled them straight into a side room.

"Tammy, Dr Yates told me in advance what she would say this morning and I wanted to be here for you."

"Dr Davison, I'd like to thank you for your consideration, as you can see Tammy is a little confused and upset."

"Mr Smart, I fully understand. I feel talking through the issue will help, I'd also like Tammy's take on her meeting with Julian Roberts."

Tammy sat down on an sofa with her father, across from Jill Davison. She dabbed damp eyes with a tissue, regaining full composure after a short delay. Both Jill and Richard waited for her, Tammy decided to take control and handed Jill a copy of Professor Roberts' letter, telling her to keep the copy.

"I'm disappointed that he wouldn't give me a full diagnosis but I understand that he cannot do that after one meeting."

"Yes, but from what he's written I believe he's already made up his mind, it's just that he has to follow the correct procedure. The issue is that he would have to justify himself to peer review by another consultant, without you being present. His notes therefore have to cover several meetings with you before he can make any diagnosis."

"So it's a case of self-preservation rather than helping me?"

"No, it is a case of protecting you from rash decisions, both by yourself and your consultant."

"So, how long?"

"Tammy, I don't know, it's out of my hands. I could give you a guess and be badly wrong."

"That doesn't help."

"I know, but you could ask Julian Roberts that question when you next see him. Now, what about your ten minutes with Helen Yates?"

"Two days ago I didn't know there was a problem with my blood, now I might have brittle bones."

"That's not what she said, and there's time to treat the condition. The issue is how it's treated and that depends on Julian Roberts. These are separate issues that are joined at the hip."

Richard, who had been listening quietly now raised an issue that had escaped them.

"What about Tammy returning to school? Can you support her given a potential conflict of interest, what with your father being the Chair on the board of governors?"

"Mr Smart, my professional code of ethics prevents my father from having any involvement in my work, I have to deal with my cases, my patients, at an objective level, to the best of my abilities. My father has to consider his own position, I can't advise him regarding his own ethics."

There was little more they could discuss. Richard and Tammy knew the governors' meeting the following morning was critical, with all the best medical advice available it was still possible for emotion to take over. As they were leaving the waiting area, Tammy was called over to the desk to speak to a female receptionist.

"Miss Smart? You have an appointment to see Dr Yates here in three weeks at nine AM. We've also booked a CT scan at Wick General Hospital tomorrow morning at ten. Can you make that?"

"I think so, dad?"

"We'll get you there."

"I'll write to confirm your appointments here, Dr Davison will see you next week according to your record. Can you confirm your address? We have it as St Andrews School, and that's a boys' school." Plainly she hadn't looked at the gender box on her screen. Richard gave her the address of the McPherson house and they walked out to the car.

Her father resolved to sort out a few issues in his own life before too long, the divorce being one of them. Perhaps it was also time for Tammy to have driving lessons, though previously not a priority, and logistically difficult.

Tamara's Début   Part Twelve   by Shiraz

 
 
Thursday 27th November Continued
 
Once the car started moving towards the car-park exit Tammy realised that she needed a few things.

"Dad?"

"Yes dear."

"Can you drop me in town, I need to do some shopping."

"Don't you want me there?"

"I think you'd get bored, it's clothes shopping and I might have to try on quite a few things."

"I get the picture, it's eleven now so what about lunch?"

"How about meeting me at a little hotel I know?" Tammy gave him directions to the place she'd gone to a week and a half earlier, she knew Frances would supply a good lunch.

"That sounds good, I've a few things to do as well. I'll see you at one."

Tammy was dropped in the middle of town, but the first thing she did was to call in to see Sarah and mention lunch. She then went around the town, then around again. She dropped the first collection of shopping bags at Sarah's before going back out, this time to the chemists for some smellies. She remembered to pick up some panty liners for her protection before she returned.

"Sarah, are you ready?"

"Give me five?"

"I've got to get there, Frances won't know dad if he arrives before me."

"Okay, you go straight there and I'll see you shortly."

Tammy walked around to the little hotel, receiving two kisses from Frances as she entered. There were about ten others in the bar, mostly couples. The conversation level was low and a sixties soundtrack played in the background. She ordered a spring water and took the lunch menu, her dad arrived a few minutes later. He looked lost as he walked in but was intercepted by Frances.

"Your daughter is in the corner over by the window."

"Thank you."

She hadn't told Frances anything so he must have guessed, Frances just gave her a wink. Dad ordered a water as well and took a look at the menu. They both decided to have a simple salad, Sarah arrived as Frances was leaving with their order.

"Sorry I'm late. Frances, a large glass of white please and a cheese salad please."

She sat down in a hurry, taking a couple of deep breaths. She'd recovered by the time her wine arrived.

"Sorry Tammy, things went mad, I could have done with a hand! I had a call for a bulk order of the rose ballgown that's in the window. A man has asked for ten of them, from size ten to sixteen, he said he had an event coming up and he wanted his girls to look just right."

"Ten? It sounds good, but are you sure it's genuine?" Richard was a little concerned.

"He paid there and then, I received authority for the whole sum from his bank. I might have give him a discount, or a credit voucher, but right now I've quoted the full amount."

"Which is?"

"£3290"

"What's your margin?"

"Thirty percent."

"So that gives you a little under a grand?" Tammy suggested.

"Have you thought about getting a better price from your suppliers?"

"Richard, I don't have the time to do that when I'm in the shop on my own, of course the suppliers aren't usually available on a Saturday."

"Would you like me to look into it?"

"If you would, Tammy knows most of the stock so would be able to help. Tammy, are you going to be free on Saturday?"

"Yes, as far as I know, but I just hope I can get through tomorrow."

Their salads had arrived, which curtailed the conversation. Sarah gave her apologies soon after and headed back to the shop. Tammy decided she had a question for her father.

"Dad, when are you going back to work?"

"I've now asked for two months leave, I'm owed a month and I'll take the rest as unpaid. That way I'll be here into January."

Tammy jumped up and rushed into her father's arms, tears poured down her face.

"I love you, thankyou."

"Tammy, I love you too."

Tammy sat back down and put a tissue to her eyes.

Richard went back to the car whilst Tammy collected her shopping from Sarah's. Richard had obtained an envelope of documents whilst in the town and made certain that these could not be seen by Tammy when she found him; he'd show and explain later.

Back at the house Tammy went to her room to stow her purchases into her growing wardrobe. Richard was intercepted by Elsie, they walked into the study and closed the door.

"Richard, I'm getting concerned for Tammy's safety."

"What's happened?"

"A TV crew turned up saying they were here to interview a boy who dressed as a school girl."

"What did you say?"

"I told them there was no-one of that description here. I also told them if they did not leave my premises I would have them removed."

"Did they leave willingly?"

"They did, but we let the dogs have a run around first."

"Which TV station was it?"

"It wasn't one of the stations, it was an independent company, I have the director's card."

"Thanks, I'll deal with this."

"How did Tammy's day go?"

"Good, another step forward with no real issues. Tammy would like it to move faster but that's only to be expected. She does however need hormone treatment sooner rather than later if only for her general health."

Richard briefly explained what Dr Yates had said, and included the conversation with the out-patients receptionist.

"Sometimes I wonder if they require three braincells to work in those places but, in this case, it prevented any odd questions for Tammy."

"It did. By the way, I've picked up a driving licence application for Tammy and booked her driving lessons for a couple of weeks time."

"Good, it'll give her more independence when she's ready for it."

"What about tomorrow?"

"We'll just take it slowly, can you let me have copies of the medical letters? There's a fax from Dr Yates, by the way."

Richard picked up the fax, it confirmed that which they'd been told that morning. He noted that the letter had been copied to Dr Hoskins and Prof Roberts, that saved him a small job.

They headed out into the hallway as Tammy came back down.

"Dad, I received a postcard from Cathy. I wish I could read it to you but it's for girls only!" She giggled loudly.

"That's great, now can we have a chat in the conservatory?"

"Just let me put a cardigan on."

Tammy was back a few minutes later, she'd bought several cardigans that morning and couldn't decide which one to wear. This was going to become an ongoing problem for her.

"Tammy, firstly a TV crew were looking for you this morning, but they've been sent away and I doubt if they'll be back."

"Okay?" She wasn't convinced.

"The company's based in Grays Inn Road in London, I'll have my solicitor deal with them. The injunction is only valid in Scotland so maybe a quiet legal word will suffice."

"Perhaps."

"Now, what are we going to tell your mother?"

The $99 question. Tammy thought about it for a while before giving her response.

"We don't phone or email, we write to her by recorded delivery. Our solicitor gets a copy the day we post it, he can wait a few days and send it to hers."

"That's the logistics, what do we say?"

"No, it's rather what do I say."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, if it comes from you she'll use it as ammunition in the divorce, if it comes from me she can't, I'm not a party to any divorce court proceedings."

"Good thinking so far, what else?"

"A simple letter, no more facts than necessary. We only include one medical report, that of Professor Roberts, but we will have to warn him. The letter needs to make it clear that this started a long time before you arrived back from Geneva, but also emphasises that I am mentally stable and have the necessary proof."

"That'll do nicely, go and draft it."

"Now?"

"Yes, it can go in the late afternoon post."

Tammy went up to her room and typed a letter. She didn't have her own printer or scanner yet so made a note to deal with that later. Back downstairs she printed the letter in the study and made a copy of the Professor's letter. She was back with her father thirty minutes after being sent on her errand.

"Excellent, I'll drop this into the post office as soon as I've confirmed your mother's address in Lausanne. Did you want to go back into town for anything?"

"I still need some bits from the stationers."

First Richard gave Tammy a form to sign, he'd already completed all the other details. She just signed it without looking too closely, her father was trusted that much. They were in the town thirty minutes later, firstly to the stationers.

Tammy went to the rear end of the shop and asked one of the staff to help her with her chosen item, a combined printer/scanner/fax.

"Anything for a wee lass."

Her father was hanging around by the best-selling paperback display when Tammy and her tame assistant arrived.

"Dad, be a dear and carry this for me. Thank you, er, George."

"No problem. Now, can we get some passport photos?"

That was done, however Tammy wasn't quite finished in town, she needed more shoes so spent an hour choosing then rejecting shoes. In the end she gained two pairs of shoes and three pairs of boots. Her father was just beginning to realise one of the downsides of having a daughter.

Richard in the meantime went to the post office where he stuck one of the passport photos to the form before posting it to the Driver & Vehicle Licencing Authority in Swansea. He also made certain that Tammy's letter to her mother was sent air mail.

Despite this he was still upbeat as they drove back. Once in her room Tammy quickly unpacked the multifunction device and plugged it into the phone line, she could use it to send faxes if necessary.It was also a wireless printer so needed configuring for the home network. She checked her emails, there was only one, from John Hibbert.

"Tom,
 
there was a TV crew up here asking asking questions and I thought I heard your name mentioned, but the Head called the police and had them removed. I don't know what was said as we weren't allowed to get close enough to hear too much, but I'm worried for you.
 
John"

 

"John,
 
thanks for your concern, they also came here but I was seeing the doctor at the time. My father is here and he's dealing with it. I can promise I'm quite safe.
 
T."

Tammy had to be a little vague right now, especially with email, as they could be forwarded very easily. She knew that John would never do it deliberately but couldn't take the risk. She went down to find her dad.

"That TV van made it up to the school as well."

"Elsie just told me, the Head's worried about bad publicity."

"I would have thought John McPherson would be a bigger problem."

"Maybe, but the latest issue is always the biggest problem, regardless what that issue is."

"So, do we need to persuade the media that John McPherson is their biggest problem?"

"I already did."

"How?"

"Tomorrow a story will appear in The Scotsman about a catering manager who is due in court next week. That will cause the rest of the media to descend on him. He'll be the headline story on the local news. Elsie has prepared a statement for the press which the school will release this afternoon."

"But this is her son."

"Yes, but you need protecting, and so does your school. By doing this John will have no way to get at you, it would be seen as a futile attempt to divert from his own problems. If he wants help he'll have to beg to his mother, the one he walked out on."

"So this might bring him back?"

"Yes, strange isn't it."

"Strange isn't the right word."

Richard's mobile rang.

"Hello?"

"Richard it's Gerald. About this letter from your daughter, who wrote it?"

"She did, that's her signature. Speak to her as well if you wish, she's your latest client."

"I needed to ask the question, you know I'll be asked."

"Yes, by the way the whole letter was her idea."

"Richard, I can see where she got her tact."

"Like father, like daughter?"

"Indeed. I'll fax the usual new client paperwork for signature."

"We'll return it straight away."

Tammy went back to her room to listen to the radio. She typed a quick email to John Hibbert suggesting he check The Scotsman's website in the morning. He'd know what to do next. Richard meanwhile took refuge in the sitting room with the day's copy of The Telegraph. He fell asleep under the paper and was woken by Thomas informing him that dinner was ready.

They all went to their rooms soon after dinner, the house was quiet before nine that evening.
 
 
Friday 28th November
 
Each of them was up early on Friday morning, for different reasons. Elsie prepared for the governors meeting, copying each of Tammy's letters twelve times. Richard needed to prepare documents for his solicitor relating to the divorce and Tammy had coursework to do, not forgetting rehearsing her lines for the play.

Thomas entered the study after knocking and handed Richard a copy of The Scotsman. The story was on page four, titled

Catering Manager sacked after food Poisoning
 
Twenty eight year old John McPherson is due in court on Tuesday charged with offences under the Environmental Health legislation. It is alleged that he directly caused a food poisoning incident at a private school in Caithness due to negligence.
 
We have spoken to the school, which has asked for anonymity for the safety of the students, and have confirmed that their catering manager has been dismissed but gave no further details. We found Mr McPherson at his address in Thurso but he refused to speak to our reporter.

Richard smiled, he then realised who else needed to see the article.

Elsie slipped out of the house not long after nine with the newspaper under her arm, she needed to be at the school well before the meeting. One of the problems she knew about in advance was the teacher George Small, who was the only member of the teaching staff so far to have encountered Tammy.

About the same time Richard found Tammy in her room and reminded her that they were needed in Wick by ten. She found him outside the front door, the car-door open. As soon as Tammy closed the door they were moving. The journey should take forty minutes, Richard managed it in thirty-five, but they still only just made it to the out patients department at Wick General Hospital on time.

Less than an hour later they were on their way back, the technician not saying anything beyond 'thank you and goodbye'.

Once back at the house Richard decided that the only way he could get his work started was to hide in the study. He'd received a box of documents from his secretary and fortunately had online access to his remaining accounts and investments.

He had instructed his secretary, Tanya, to arrange for a valuation on the London house, and to change the alarm code. Although Tanya was officially employed by the bank, and Richard was now on leave, he also employed Tanya one day per week as his private PA. It was an arrangement that worked for both of them, Tanya was more than compensated for her dual role.

Richard also knew that his prolonged leave of absence would cause the bank to appoint a temporary replacement, probably Richard's deputy, who would cost less than Richard. He was busy establishing himself in Thurso, whether he knew it or not.

During the course of the late morning Tammy made good headway with her coursework, the lack of interruptions helped. She brought several projects up-to-date and found she had full access to the school library index. Those books and documents not available through the library would have to be ordered online. She sent an email to the librarian, asking that any of her reservations be delivered to the school office marked for the McPherson house.

By lunch both Richard and Tammy were ready for a break. Michael had returned from college so the three of them sat in the conservatory at the smaller table, it was ridiculous to use the huge dining room table under the circumstances. Conversation was light, Michael wasn't aware of the latest happenings so kept quiet. Nothing at this point had been heard from the school and Tammy was getting a little twitchy.

"Tammy, there's no point worrying, we'll find out their decision when they're ready."

They both went back to their work, but at one thirty Richard came to find Tammy.

"You've got an appointment, grab your things."

"What appointment?"

"A hair appointment. Get moving!"

They walked into Sandy's salon at two and Tammy was immediately taken to a washing station. She still had extensions in her hair but Sandy removed these before washing and conditioning her hair. New longer extensions would be used.

Richard left them working on his daughter then walked the short distance to Sarah's shop, where he found Mrs McIntosh talking to Sarah.

"Good morning Richard," said Sarah as he walked in. Anne McIntosh repeated the greeting. "Is Tammy with Sandy?"

"Yes, just left her there. I think she'll be some time."

"At least an hour, probably two if you booked the full treatment, I just hope Joanne doesn't get her hand on Tammy this time, although I doubt she needs another one this soon."

"Another what?"

"Waxing."

"Hmmm, I hadn't considered that, are you sure I shouldn't have asked Sandy for that?"

"Yes, Tammy only had her bikini line done a week ago."

"Okay, leave it there. I don't need to know any more."

The two women laughed.

"Richard, I take it you're here for a reason?"

"Yes, is it that obvious? I'm worried how Tammy might take a rejection."

"Richard, I've talked to my husband and I feel that's unlikely but he can't speak for the governors themselves." Anne McIntosh was being open about her interference in the issue.

"Richard, I'll be there for Tammy. I'm the one who put her in this position so I will be there for her."

"Sarah, Anne, thank you. That's what I hoped to hear."

"Richard, you know we will be there for her, Elsie has invited us to dinner tomorrow, weren't you aware?"

Richard wanted to talk to Sarah about her business and his offer to help with the contracts but felt, rightly, that it would not be appropriate to discuss this in front of Anne. He decided to pick up a long skirt in Tammy's size and asked the women's opinion.

"It will suit her." "Good idea."

He realised that they knew he was buying this to make Tammy feel happier, regardless of the outcome today. He paid and walked back to the car. He took a drive round the area, passing John McPherson's flat, spotting John's car with a 'for sale' sign in the window.

Richard knew he was partly responsible for John's need to sell the car but he knew he had a duty to protect Tammy. In this case John had to suffer, at least in the short term, so he would realise that bigotry is not welcome anywhere.

Richard continued his journey until he reached a car dealership. Richard's own car was still in London but he knew the cost of bringing it this far north was excessive. His plan was that he'd have a car both ends of the country until his, and his daughter's, long-term future was confirmed.

Given the extreme landscape and the type of winters northern Scotland has, Richard considered that he needed a 4x4 cars, unsurprisingly latching onto a Land Rover Freelander, identifying and costing some of the options. The dealer offered a credit deal, Richard just suggested they charge it all to his card, after he confirmed a delivery date of the following Wednesday. He also made a note of speaking to his insurance company. By the time he was done with the paperwork he had to head straight back to collect Tammy. She wasn't quite finished when he walked into the warm salon.

"Richard, do you mind taking a seat? she'll only be a minute or two."

"Not at all, I can't see Tammy though."

"She's out the back with Joanne."

"I thought ..."

"Don't worry."

Richard sat and picked up one of the magazines on the adjacent table, he then put Cosmo back down, it wasn't his normal reading material. he barely noticed his daughter returning to the main area.

"Hi dad."

"Hello Tammy, you look lovely, really."

"Thanks." She stretched up on her toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. He paid and they walked to the car.

"What was Joanne doing? I thought you didn't need a wax this time."

"We were talking, that's all. She had some information for me."

Richard knew he shouldn't ask any more so waited before they reached the car. The paperwork from the dealership was spread across the passenger seat, Tammy pretended not to notice it whilst her father moved it to the rear seats. In the process he picked up the carrier bag.

"Oh dad, it's lovely. I'll wear it tonight for the rehearsal. Don't forget I need to be there well before seven."

The ride home was good but both knew there could be some news. When they walked into the house it was apparent that Elsie wasn't there. In fact apart from Thomas there was no-one.

"Miss Smart, there is a telephone message for you in your room. Mr Smart there is some post for you."

"Thank you Thomas."

Tammy scampered up the stairs, dropping the shopping bag on her bed then sat at the writing table to look at the message. It was a very simple request to call Alison.

"Hi."

"Hi Tammy, how are you?"

"I think I'm alright but there's a meeting today about me at the school."

"Tammy, you know things will sort themselves out."

"I know, but what do I do if .." Tammy started to cry.

"Tammy, talk to me."

"Yes Alison." Tammy dried her eyes on a tissue.

"Come on, be strong girl. You have everything and everyone on your side."

"I suppose so."

"I know so. What are you doing this evening?"

"Rehearsal."

"Great, but you can't sing if you're crying, can you?"

"Yeah."

"Look girl, if you don't cheer up I'm jumping on the plane."

"Yes Nurse Alison."

Alison rang off muttering threats as there was a knock on her bedroom door. Tammy walked across and found her father on the other side.

"Tammy, can you come to the study please."

She followed her father into the study where Elsie and her headmaster were waiting.

"Tammy, could you take a seat? This won't take long." Tammy couldn't read Elsie's face. Her headmaster spoke next.

"Tammy, as you know the governors met today to discuss your future at the school. I must say that there was a great deal of discussion and many individual views were aired. What was obvious is that you do have support but with reservations. The meeting has decided to postpone a final decision pending more medical evidence."

Tammy looked relieved.

"However, one member of staff, himself a governor, has made an allegation that you lied to him. He is asking for your exclusion for this reason and for bringing the school into disrepute.

"No!" Tammy collapsed.

Tamara's Début   Part Thirteen   by Shiraz

 
Friday 28th November
 
Tammy came to with Elsie and her father by her side. She was disorientated for a few seconds then remembered what had been said.

"He can't."

"Tammy," Elsie spoke, "the other governors told him to withdraw his remarks. I had already made it clear to them that you had been told to pretend to be someone else for your own safety. I can't say he'll be happy but we'll have to live with that."

"Was it Mr Small?"

"Yes, it was. It is fortunate you told me about those encounters, Tammy. Would you want some water?"

They waited for Thomas to bring Tammy a glass of chilled water before continuing. The headmaster now took back control of the situation.

"Miss Smart,Tammy, can we get back to the main issue? The governors have agreed that a change in policy for the sixth form may be appropriate and we could admit girls over sixteen years old as day students. This is subject to ratification at the next meeting but would remove that obstacle if you're prepared to be a day student."

"I am. Thank you sir."

"Please bear in mind that the policy change cannot take place for another three weeks because it has to be an agenda item at the next full meeting. The time-scale for that meeting takes us almost to the Christmas break. Even assuming that policy change is confirmed, however, we would still need evidence that you are legally female."

Richard asked the obvious question, "why can't Tammy return now?"

"Because she'd have to return as a male, if she was dressed as a female then she would not have the added protection of the law, she could therefore be the subject of discrimination and made a laughing stock by the other students, perhaps also some of the staff."

"I see, what about the meantime?"

"We'll continue to treat Tammy as an extraordinary medical case and supply coursework. I'll have the messenger drop by daily on their way to and from the post-office. Is that acceptable, Miss Smart?"

"Tammy?" Tammy had almost switched off during that exchange.

"Yes sir."

The headmaster got up to leave then stopped at the study door.

"Oh, we have changed your school records to Miss Tamara Smart. I'll write to you to confirm what we've said here, most of it anyway."

That last remark gained a polite chuckle from the others, the head then bade his farewell and walked out into the cold air. It had started snowing and a thin layer was settling on the gravel driveway. Elsie and Richard were stood next to Tammy in the hallway.

"Tammy, why don't you go and have a wash? You still have the rehearsal tonight if you want to go and dinner will be about fifteen minutes."

Tammy walked upstairs to her room; today hadn't been so bad, she thought, but what was happening to her though? She had never become so wound up before.

She was back down with a few minutes to spare. Dinner was a quiet affair, she had the feeling the others present didn't want to wind her up. Michael was sat opposite, constantly looking in Tammy's direction. As they rose to head out of the dining room Michael walked alongside Tammy.

"Would you like a lift to the theatre?"

"Yes please, if you don't mind?"

"I have to go into town anyway, when do you want to leave?"

"Five minutes?"

Tammy rushed back upstairs and decided to put some thicker tights on with the skirt her father had bought that afternoon. A few minutes later she was walking out of the door into the snow, it was falling harder now.

Michael borrowed Elsie's Landrover for the ride into Thurso, dropping Tammy outside the theatre at six forty-five. He reached over and gave her a kiss on the cheek just as she was about to get out of the car. Tammy blushed, having mixed emotion.

"Thank you, er, Michael. See you at nine?"

She hurried in through the door and shook the snow off her coat and hat before hanging them up. She hurried over to join fellow actor Tanya at the piano as Iain Brown addressed the cast.

"Everyone, thanks for being her promptly tonight. What we're going to do tonight is do a complete run through, without the dancing. Just the dialogue and the songs. I'll give you a chance to warm up, we start in five."

Sandy Franklin, the musical director, helped Tammy and Tanya through some exercises, they'd been joined at the piano by the boys playing Tony, Bernardo and Riff. Tammy could see John Hibbert about five metres away, he'd plainly been looking at her but turned quickly away when Tammy smiled at him.

Act 1 went well, with only a few false starts. Some of the gang members had to be told not to shout, and maybe not to sing, "just mime, can you?" suggested the director.

During the ten minute break John started walking slowly over to Tammy. She sensed that she could ruin everyone's evening at this point, she also knew that it had to be done, regardless. She asked him to sit down, not giving him a chance to argue. She had to take control of what happened next.

"John, I needed to speak to you."

"Why?" He was confused, he had only just gained the courage to speak to her.

"John, it's me Tom, or at least it used to be."

John sat there open mouthed, then uttered one word, "what?"

Tammy laughed at him then paused for a few seconds, "you need to ask a more intelligent question John, but I think I know what you mean!"

John smiled, he was still confused but these were Tom's words, not the girl sat in front of him in the long skirt with a wide smile on her face.

"John, let me give you the short version. My name is now legally Tamara Smart but I'm known as Tammy. I'm living as a girl and I'll be returning to school in a few weeks as a girl."

"But, but, it's a boys school." John concentrated on the subject matter he could comprehend.

"Not for much longer, the governors decided today in principle to allow girls in the sixth form. They meet again in a few weeks to confirm that decision."

"But why are you dressed like that?" He finally asked the question that had been bugging him for the past two minutes.

"Because this is who I really am, my shrink agrees with me."

"A shrink, is it a mental illness?"

"No, I'll say it's a state of mind, if that's easier to understand. Inside my outwardly male body is a female soul. Did you imagine for one minute I wasn't a girl before you came over to speak to me?"

"No, and I was coming over to ask you out!"

"Maybe next week?"

John blushed bright red but was saved by Iain calling the cast back together. Tanya hadn't missed John's reaction and whispered to Tammy when they returned to the piano.

"What did you say to him?"

"That would be telling, but I turned down a date so he's all yours if you want him. His name's John and he's a nice guy."

"Thanks, I'm a free agent at the moment."

The second act went well and they were finished just before nine. Iain called them together before they left.

"Everyone, can you be back at three on Sunday please for another run through. I want the gang members here for dance practice on Monday at seven and everyone at seven on Wednesday as usual. We only have a few weeks to get this right and we start full dress rehearsals in just over a week. Goodnight."

As they walked to the coat hooks John caught up with Tammy. "Tammy I still don't understand."

Tammy had a quick idea, "John, how are you getting back to the school?"

"I booked a taxi for nine fifteen in case we overran."

"Cancel it and ride back with me. I'll make sure you get back to the school by eleven."

John thought about it for a few seconds then pulled his phone out to call the taxi company. Michael pulled up in the Landrover and Tammy almost had to put John, who was now having second thoughts, into the rear seats. Tammy rode up front with Michael.

"Michael, this is John Hibbert, a school friend." "Hi John." "Hello Michael."

The ride back to the house was quiet. It wasn't snowing any longer but there was a fair cushion of the fluffy stuff on the ground, and it wasn't going anywhere soon, the road however was clear.

Tammy pulled the still uncertain John in through the front door where one of the staff met them to take their coats. John suddenly realised that Tammy had been holding his hand.

"Ummm, perhaps I should head back?"

"Don't be silly, come with me."

She led him to the sitting room where her father and Elsie were sat.

"Dad, Elsie, I believe you both know John from my year?"

"Tammy, I take it that ..." Richard was about to ask if John knew the truth about Tammy.

Tammy cut him off, "yes." She wanted to say more but felt it was best left unsaid.

"John, this is my father and Elsie McPherson. Elsie is one of the school governors and owner of this house."

"Pleased to meet you Mr Smart, Mrs McPherson, although I'm not sure why I'm here." he tried to laugh at his own joke, Tammy at least knew his humour well and joined in.

"Elsie, could you arrange for some coffee please? We'll be in my room."

She could see her father's eyes suddenly connect with hers."

"It's okay dad, John will be the perfect gentleman. I just need to have a quiet chat with him. Do you think we could arrange for him to go back to the school in perhaps an hour?"

"I'll sort that out, and I trust you young lady."

John registered the last comment but was still trying to make sense of it as Tammy led him up the stairs. She left the door open as she sat in one of the armchairs, John took the other. Nothing meaningful was said until after the coffee had been delivered and the door closed.

"Tom, Tammy, I'm confused, I mean really confused."

"John, I thought you should be the first to know, we've known each-other for so many years, but you only knew Tom not Tammy."

"What does that mean?"

"Inside, in here," Tammy pointed at her bust realising that would have to be mentioned," in here is a female heart, a female soul, a female mind. They've always been there, I've just had to hide my true self."

"I think I understand," he plainly didn't.

"let me put it another way, do you remember how I kept myself to myself? How I played rugby but couldn't have made the first or second fifteen however much I tried?"

"Yes, you were better at running and shooting than the team games."

"That's right. Now think, did I spend time in the common room except when I had to?"

"No, come to think of it."

"I didn't fit in." She left that hanging in the air as she sipped her coffee and nibbled the ginger nuts that had been brought up at the same time. She waited for John to say the next words but he obviously didn't know what to say.

"John, I want you to understand that I'm living as a woman now, a young lady if you prefer. I'm seeing people who understand me and who don't think I have a mental disorder. I hope, in a few weeks, I'll have a letter that says I'm legally female. I've already changed my name, as far as I'm concerned Tom no longer exists."

"Wow, I mean you're serious aren't you?" Tammy just nodded. "So are you going to," he blushed, "have it, umm, chopped off?"

"Not yet, at least, and not without persuading many doctors if I finally decide I want to."

Another coffee sipping break was needed whilst John formulated the next question, although he'd already asked it, "When are you coming back to school?"

"Just after Christmas hopefully, there has to be another governors' meeting and I need more one or two more letters from my doctors."

"I saw them empty your room."

"Yes, I won't be staying at the school any more, I'm living here now."

John looked around the room, trying not to look at the very pretty double bed, "it's bigger than your old room."

"Slightly, I have en-suite and a walk-in wardrobe." She got up and opened the doors. he saw all the feminine clothes hanging there and blushed again. Having been at the school for seven years he was not used to being around the female species.

"John, you need to control yourself," she giggled.

"Tammy, what do I tell the others?"

"I reckon that new rumours will be going round the school very quickly. I'll have an announcement ready for the sixth form by breakfast on Monday. Keep it to yourself until then?"

He agreed and I walked him downstairs. Michael had been nominated to take John back to the school, they left a few minutes later. Outside Tammy could see it was snowing again, only this time it was quite hard. The wind had got up as well, it was blowing a force eight.

Tammy gave her father a quick kiss and went up to bed. She missed seeing Michael and John return to the house, the A9 was blocked and the snowploughs hadn't yet been sent out. Michael wasn't confident driving on heavy snow yet, having passed his test in the spring. The only option was to turn back.
 
 
Saturday 29th November
 
Tammy was therefore surprised to see John Hibbert at breakfast when she came down in her gown after rising late. Elsie just just walking back into the room at that moment.

"John, I've spoken to the school and explained what had happened, they had only just realised you weren't at breakfast and had sent a boy to your room. I said we'd get you back there as soon as the road is open."

"Thank you for putting me up last night."

"It was no trouble, really."

Tammy decided to keep quiet and excused herself immediately after breakfast to shower and dress. She was due at Sarah's shop but had no intentions of going outside into the deep snow so dressed comfortably in a knee length skirt and sheer tights, coupled with a t-shirt. She phoned Sarah and gave her apologies for the day.

She came back downstairs as her father was getting ready to take John back to the school. Richard had opted to drive given the weather, he'd spent over a year living near the slopes west of Geneva. John's jaw dropped as he saw the teenage girl approaching. Richard gave his daughter a kiss, John, almost by reflex kissed her as well, then realised what he'd done, went red and apologised.

"John, there's nothing to apologise for."

"But, but....."

"But nothing, my father's waiting to take you now."

"Yes, bye Tom, er, Tammy."

Richard and John walked out the door and Tammy was left wondering what just happened. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate the peck on her cheek, she just wasn't expecting it from the young man she used to share a room with when they first arrived at the school.

She immersed herself in her school-work for the rest of the morning and again for the afternoon. The house was mostly quiet with everyone else reading or working. Richard had received some faxes from the bank which he was now concentrating on. He'd also received a box of papers from his London house the previous day and had those to deal with. It was the letters from his employer that took preference however. The main board of directors had agreed that savings had to be made in order to prevent direct interference by the government.

The letter Richard was holding right now was an offer of early retirement. At fifty years old he still expected to work for another five years before taking a very decent pension but now they were offering the same deal with some extras thrown in. He wanted to fax his acceptance straight away but knew Tammy's sponsorship would almost certainly end. A little bargaining was needed, as well as a chat with Tammy.

Of course the divorce would have another bearing on his retirement. He'd have to keep Tara away from his pension by making her an offer she couldn't refuse. He then had an idea that might help him, he quickly composed a fax to his solicitor suggesting a little pre-emptive surveillance of his wife but then remembered something. He phoned the hotel in Lausanne.

"Hello this is Richard Smart."

"Ah yes Mr Smart, how can I help you?"

"My wife Tara Smart is using suite 401 but I was thinking of of upgrade. I would like a copy of the last quarter's account first though, could you fax me the latest invoices to this number please?"

"Certainly."

Richard put aside his fax to Gerald, his solicitor, then started going through his files that had been delivered. He starting looking through the folders that contained Tammy's and his own investments but needed more time so vowed to go through them tomorrow. He was pulling out the property folder when the fax started up.

The first page made for interesting reading. Considering that the divorce papers were lodged less than two weeks earlier, his wife had been charging for two breakfasts from the last two weeks of September. The fax machine was still working, the following two months were printed and a similar story was laid bare. Richard screwed up the original fax to Gerald and wrote a new one, enclosing the hotel invoices; the divorce had just become interesting.

After dinner Richard asked Tammy to join him back in the study.

"Tammy, I know you're going through a big change in your life right now but I'd like your opinion on something else."

"What is it?"

"I've been offered early retirement."

"Do you want to retire?"

"I think right now, given the economic climate, it might be a good idea to take the offer." He handed Tammy the bank's covering letter and the pension illustration pages.

"That looks good, but what about the financial impact on the divorce?"

"I'm working on that and I have most of that in hand but right now I have a chance to modify the retirement deal. Is there anything you can think of that could be included?"

"Well, my school fees are paid by the bank, but if I'm not boarding then there's an adjustment to be made."

"Correct."

"And I was going to be sponsored through university."

"So, would you want to keep that?"

"I would have a guaranteed job after three or four years."

"Okay, I'll put that in. Do you think I should take it?"

"Had you considered retiring before they made this offer?"

"I hadn't considered the implications of early retirement, but how does moving up here sound?"

"You know I love this area, it's just a little too far from civilisation!"

"I'm sure we can do something about that. Question is, are you ready for me to be around every day?"

"Yes!" Tammy hugged her father and then started to cry on his shoulder. He said nothing, just held her tight, Richard knew these were tears of happiness.

Tammy was on a high that night when she went up to her room.
 
 
Sunday 30th November
 
The following morning Tammy returned to her studies immediately after an early breakfast and ordered some books from the school library by email; she was now openly using her Tammy email address. She printed off the finished work and bundled it together for the messenger on Monday morning.

Tammy then wrote one of the most difficult letters she'd ever had to write. This was an open letter to her fellow sixth formers, a shorter version would be put on the school's intranet.

Dear friends,
 
By now you will have heard many rumours concerning me, I'd like to be able to be open with you and give you the true version of why Tom Smart is now Tamara Smart.
 
I have for many years felt I was a girl trapped in a boy's body. I kept this hidden from almost everyone, including the school and my parents. It was a few weeks ago, when the school was first closed because of other problems that I became a girl fulltime. I was able to become the real me and stop pretending to be the person that everyone thought they knew.
 
I am still in the sixth form, I have not left, nor been asked to leave, the school. The governors have voted to accept my situation, subject to some remaining issues, and we are working together so I can return to the school itself in the new year. Until then I am living in Thurso, continuing my studies.
 
If anyone would like to contact me they can do so via the school office.
 
Tamara (Tammy) Smart

Tammy re-read the message then sent it to the Headteacher's email address, with a blind copy to John Hibbert.

It was now ten thirty, after a quick check to confirm her coursework was up to date, she made her way down to the sitting room. She was a little stiff from being sat for a few hours so said, to no-one in particular, that she needed a walk. The moment this was mentioned, Michael, who'd been sat in the far corner, stood up.

"Tammy, do you mind if I joined you?"

"Michael, I don't mind at all."

They grabbed their outdoor clothes, including sensible boots and walked out into the snow. They had just turned to head back when Michael starting speaking.

"Tammy, how are you handling all of this?"

"In what way?"

"I mean, your changes, how everyone reacts, my brother?"

"Michael, I used to be a quiet nerdy boy who wanted to hide, I wanted to hide from myself. I have no hang-ups now, I'm the girl I always should have been and I'm not afraid.

"Everyone has been so wonderful, that is everyone except your brother. I think his original problem was blind infatuation, then when he found out about me he feared he'd be laughed at. Of course he could always claim that he was under stress at the time because of the school kitchens problem."

"I suppose so, he might be my older brother but he was still an idiot. I don't know what he'll do now, mum has given him some heavy conditions if he wants her to help him again."

"So she speaks to him?"

"Yes, although shouts might be more accurate."

Tammy laughed, she'd never seen Elsie angry but knew she had a sharp tongue. She hadn't been paying attention to where her feet were going and suddenly slipped. Michael caught her before she hit the icy ground and helped Tammy back up. He kept hold of her arm, then linked his as they continued their walk back to the house.

They stopped on the steps by the side door.

"Michael, thanks for that. I could have hurt myself."

"I'd do anything for a lovely lady."

"Michael, if I didn't know better I thought you'd just made a pass at me."

They both laughed and stepped inside, leaving their dripping boots next to the door.

Richard was waiting for Tammy. "We need to have some lunch and get you to the theatre for three. I want to allow more time than normal so get changed out of those wet things and get back here for lunch. Off you go, girl." He lightly smacked her rear as she scuttled up the stairs.

Tammy came back down in a heavy wool skirt and went straight to the dining room for lunch.

Just after two thirty Tammy and Richard walked into the theatre. Very few people were there, but Tanya had already arrived and was warming up with the help of the piano.

"Hi Tammy. Is this your dad?"

"Yes, my taxi." The girls laughed, Richard looked as if he was going to say something but just smiled, kissed Tammy and walked back to the car.

When Iain walked onto the stage, the girls were on their second run of 'America', complete with the right accents. He applauded as they finished.

"Well done girls, I knew our talent scout was good at her work."

The rest of the rehearsal went smoothly, once the cast had finally arrived. Everyone now knew their parts.

"Everyone, we need to measure you for your costumes. Please get yourself to Sarah's Boutique on Wednesday afternoon, Sarah will be here on Wednesday evening for anyone who can't get to her, but she doesn't have time to see all of you here. I'm told she has a wonderful assistant and that she doesn't bite. Gang members, tomorrow please at seven, otherwise six forty-five on Wednesday. Goodbye."

Richard was waiting outside for Tammy, it was just gone six and it was snowing again but the roads were clear, for now at least. Fifteen minutes later they were back at the house and went straight to the dining room for dinner. Wine was on the table and Tammy allowed herself a small glass.

After dinner, sat by the fire in the sitting room, Richard reminded Tammy about the following day.

"Midday in Edinburgh, are you kidding?"

"No. Jeremiah Smith phoned me this afternoon and suggested it would be good if you were there, Elsie also expects to be there, representing the school."

Tammy decided that she needed to be fresh for the morning so excused herself and went to bed.

Tamara's Début   Part Fourteen   by Shiraz

 
Monday 1st December
 
Tammy was woken by the bedside phone ringing. It was pitch black in her room and she took a few moments to remember where she was. After putting on the bedside lamp she looked at the clock and saw it was only six o'clock, she finally picked up the receiver after what seemed to be an eternity.

"Hello? I hope this is an emergency."

"Almost Tammy, we have the chopper arriving at seven. Get yourself showered, put something decent on and be down to breakfast by half six. There's a coffee on the way up."

"Yes dad." Tammy was less than enthusiastic, even at school she could have lain in bed until at least half six. She dragged herself into the shower and was back in her bedroom in ten minutes, a hairdryer in her hand. The promised coffee was already sat beside the bed, she sipped it carefully as it felt like it was still at boiling point.

Tammy took a skirt suit out of the walk-in wardrobe and found some appropriate lingerie. It wouldn't be seen but she knew it was reinforce her view that she was a woman through and through. She finished with some light make-up before putting on a blouse and her jacket. Tammy made it downstairs a few minutes after six thirty.

"Come on, we don't have much time."

Richard took his daughter into a small room she didn't recognise. It had a breakfast bar and a serving hatch into the kitchen. Richard explained that when Elsie and Michael were on their own they often didn't take breakfast at the same time so used this small room instead of the dining room.

Sat in this inner room they didn't hear the helicopter touch down but one of the staff informed Richard through the open hatch. They quickly finished their toast and coffee before heading outside with their coats and bags.

It was bitterly cold in the open air with a heavy frost, if it hadn't been for the helicopter then it would have been perfectly still. The chopper blades were still turning as the two approached so they had to dip their heads, a crewman escorted them into the cabin. The noise outside had been tremendous but dropped as the door was slid shut. They took off almost immediately. Tammy still felt like she had to shout however, the noise had affected her hearing temporarily.

"Dad, are we going all the way to Edinburgh?"

"No, Inverness. We have to catch the 07.55 train to Edinburgh, the helicopter has other jobs this morning and can only give us an hour or so."

They rode mostly in silence, it was still very dark and only just above freezing. Apparently sensing this, a crewman gave Tammy and Richard a coffee each, in a non-spill mug.

Just after seven thirty-five they were over Inverness, they landed at Fraser Park and a waiting taxi took them along Kingmills Road to the station. A few minutes later they were sat in the first class section of the train. Richard took some papers out of his briefcase and started looking through them, Tammy had bought a copy of the Scotsman as Richard paid for the tickets, she pulled an MP3 player out of her bag and put the earphones on, to the apparent disgust of passengers in the first class area.

Because of the other passengers, most conversation was limited to current affairs, neither of them had a wish to discuss the day's appointment in any detail, nor the divorce.

"Dad, wasn't Elsie supposed to be with us?"

"Yes, but she had other business to attend to. She's given me something in writing and has made other arrangements."

Tammy knew this was code for a solicitor, she wondered who was paying for the day's case, not that she couldn't afford it herself.

They arrived at Edinburgh Waverley station at half past eleven and took a short taxi ride to the High Court on Lawnmarket. Having walked through the security check, including a rummage of Tammy's handbag and Richard's briefcase, they made their way to the correct waiting area. Richard checked in with the clerk.

"Mr Smart?"

"Yes, Mr Smith?"

"At your service, and I presume this is your daughter?"

"Yes, may I present Miss Tamara Smart."

"Pleased to meet you, can we get a private room before we're called?"

They were led a short distance from the waiting area to a side room. It was very spartan, a table and four chairs, all screwed to the floor.

"I'm sorry about the accommodation, but it's all that's available. Now, we don't have much time so can we get straight to the matter? I have also been asked to represent the school as a joint application, I hope this will add weight. I also believe the High Sheriff's father is an old boy."

"Wouldn't that be a problem, a conflict of interest perhaps?"

"Not in this case as the High Sheriff himself is not an old boy. Now, I have some papers from a Professor Roberts and a Dr Davison, as well as the court papers relating to John McPherson. Is there anything else?"

"I don't believe so."

"Good, I hate surprises," he laughed at his own remark. "Now, Miss Smart, you could be asked how this is affecting you. I need to know what you would say in court."

"I would explain that I need to finish my education in peace. However, until John McPherson comes to terms with his own situation I am a potential target. His mother is trying to calm him but he's not answering her calls. I'm also aware that he made several calls to the media in the past week concerning myself and my school."

"That clarifies what I've been told. Now, isn't St Andrews a private boys school?"

"Currently yes, but the governors are about to admit girls to the sixth form as day students, I should be able to return there as a girl in January once that decision is ratified."

"However, according to the papers I have, you aren't legally female yet."

"No, but I have an appointment with Professor Roberts in a few weeks when I hope that will be clarified."

"I see. Mr Smart, do you have anything to add to your daughter's view?"

"No, she has summarised the situation well."

They were interrupted by a tannoy announcement calling them to Court 8.

Half an hour later they were walking back out onto Lawnmarket. Looking to the right they could see Edinburgh Castle, although low cloud today was preventing a good view. They turned around and walked back to the station, it was closer than they'd realised.

"Dad, I'm trying to work out if we won or not."

"Tammy, the answer is yes and no. We've lost the injunction preventing anyone going to the press about you but the school now has a legally enforceable non-disclosure order. That will protect any student until they leave the school, that includes you."

"So instead of stopping John McPherson from getting me on the front page of the newspaper, he can be prosecuted afterwards."

"Yes, I know it's not ideal but it was the best the High Sheriff would accept as you're over eighteen."

The ride back to Inverness was mostly quiet, with Tammy falling asleep. Richard made several phone calls, only to find that the weather had grounded the helicopter. When the guard came round to check tickets, Richard had to buy onward tickets to Thurso, a further three hours into the Highlands, once the connecting train finally left Inverness.

It was gone nine when they eventually arrived back at the house, both were tired and hungry. Richard knew he'd get indigestion if he ate a full dinner now so had a sandwich, Tammy wanted even less and took herself straight to bed.
 
 
Tuesday 2nd December
 
Of course by seven the following morning Tammy was famished. She dashed through the shower and threw some warm clothes on. Out of the window the gales were blowing the fresh snow around, she'd barely registered the weather the previous evening but could now see the ferocity of the storm.

She reached the bottom of the stairs when Thomas appeared.

"Coffee, Miss?"

"Yes please Thomas, and breakfast if you could."

"Certainly."

There were definite advantages to having staff thought Tammy. The coffee arrived swiftly, breakfast followed a few minutes later. Although Tammy felt she had to keep fit and healthy, the occasional full fat breakfast didn't hurt, did it? She'd almost finished when her father wandered in.

"Couldn't wait for me?"

"I needed this, now I just have to work out how to lose the weight I just put on, carefully that is."

"I certainly hope so, I don't want another medical issue on my hands."

There was apparently an understanding between father and daughter that needed no further explanation. Elsie and Michael appeared next, then Andrea. Tammy screamed and ran straight to her.

"When did you arrive?"

"Yesterday evening when you were still on the train."

"What are you doing back here?"

"I have some days off so I came to see you." Tammy gave her a hug and let Andrea take a seat at the table. Tammy wanted to interrogate Andrea but let her finish her breakfast. Elsie was next to speak however.

"Tammy, Dr Hoskins phoned. There's a new certificate at the surgery for you. He's signed you off until the end of the month with stress."

"I'm not stressed."

"Don't worry about that, he had to put something and that's the easiest to justify."

"I suppose so."

"Anyway, I'll have the school messenger collect it on their way back from the post office, after all it's the school that needs it. That will save you going out. What were you planning on doing today?"

"I don't know. I didn't see any new schoolwork this morning and there's no way I'm heading into town. Any ideas Andrea?"

"How about a swim?"

"Swim?"

"Yes, there's a pool in the basement."

"I don't have a cozzie."

"I'm sure one of mine will fit you, let's have a look."

Half an hour later they walked into the steam room and sat there talking, getting the gossip. Of course Andrea wanted to know what Tammy's doctors had said. Tammy in turn wanted to know what Andrea and her sister had been doing since the previous week.

Andrea had lent Tammy a swimsuit, so that when they emerged from the steam room Tammy could dive into the pool without fear of anything coming adrift. They enjoyed almost an hour in the pool before hitting the poolside shower. Once there Andrea started to peel off her bikini then stopped.

"Tammy, we're girls here right? I need a shower and I'm not ashamed of my body, neither should you be."

They were back in the sitting room at half past ten, giggling at some joke that started fifteen minutes earlier. They'd ended up in Andrea's room sharing the hair dryer before Tammy went to get dressed.

Coffee arrived without anything being said, although the girls almost missed it owing to their continued conversation. Richard excused himself to the study to get some peace. Whilst there he took a call from his solicitor.

"Richard, I've seen the report from Edinburgh. I take it you're not happy?"

"No Gerald, but there's a limit to privacy in this country. At least the school aspect is protected."

"True. Now, about these hotel invoices?"

"Yes, interesting aren't they?"

"I need to know they were honestly obtained."

"Of course, I'm still paying for the suite so I'm entitled to the invoices, I probably had copies of them anyway as my PA handles the account."

"That's fine, it's just in case we are challenged in court. What do you want me to do?"

"How about a few photos of the other party?"

"I'm not certain about that, Swiss law could be a problem. How about we raise the issue with her solicitor and see where it goes, without declaring our hand?"

"If you think that's the best approach. Did you get the financial paperwork?"

"Yes, it looks good. We'll have to work on an optimal settlement once we've heard her demands. We'll also have to meet in a few weeks, are there any days to avoid?"

Richard looked through his organiser before he answered, "Tammy has a couple of appointments she can't miss, they're on the 10th and the 18th, plus the play on the 12th to the 14th. Given the distance we'd need two days for travelling, I'd also need a day to see my PA. That makes three or even four days, can we work around that?"

"How about the 8th?"

"That might work, shall we say just after midday?"

"On a Monday? Only if you pay for lunch!"

"I'll book that then, Gerald."

Richard sent his PA, Tanya Harding, a quick email asking her to book a flight from Wick to Stansted on the 7th and to make sure the house was ready for them that night. He also asked her to meet him at the house on the 8th.

It was lunchtime when Richard returned to the sitting room. The girls had disappeared and the house was strangely quiet. Outside the storm had abated but it was still not good weather for going out. Thomas intercepted Richard as he was heading back to the study.

"Mr Smart, there was a delivery for you, and one for Miss Smart. I've placed them in the study." Richard hadn't been out of the study for two minutes and hadn't seen Thomas until just now, so how? He shrugged and went back into the panelled room.

Tammy's bundle was schoolwork, Richard's was more papers from the bank and some post that had been forwarded by his PA. It included a valuation on the London house plus a current statement on all investments, just in case he thought. Richard left the paperwork to one side, he didn't need to review it all yet.

There was a knock on the door, stood outside were Tammy and Andrea. both wearing shorts and polo shirts. Richard had a hard time concentrating on their faces as he spoke.

"I take it you found the games room?"

"Dad, why didn't you mention it before?"

"Because we both had other things to keep us busy, speaking of which there's some schoolwork on the desk," he pointed over his shoulder.

The groan was very audible but any more complaining was interrupted as Elsie arrived and informed everyone that lunch was served.

After lunch Tammy wanted to get back to the games room but Richard had handed her the coursework. She reluctantly took is upstairs and fired up her laptop. Her emails were the next activity, there were two that stood out.

Miss Smart,
 
I have passed your message to the sixth formers as requested.
 
S. McIntosh
Headmaster

 

Tammy,
 
Thanks for the advance notice of the message you sent.
 
It was mostly seen very positive by the rest of the sixth form, although Ben and Sam tried to create an issue from it, although Mr Small said something this morning in the English class. Otherwise there were no real problems.
 
A few of them have come to speak to me seeing as we'd roomed together for several years and I was able to refute several suggestions. I also told them how I'd seen you several times at the theatre without realising exactly who you were. They have asked me for a photo next time I see you and I think most will try to make it to the show.
 
Regards
 
John

Tammy looked at the email from John Hibbert and knew she had judged him correctly. She had been fully accepted by almost everyone. The exceptions were two sixth-formers who always took the opposite view of the majority plus one teacher she'd already had an issue with. Overall, she had thirty-five plus sixth-formers on her side, not a bad ratio.

She got down to her work, partly because it needed to be done and partly as it would distract her from the other issues. After an hour she had completed the first task, without taking a break. Tammy was going to call the kitchen to ask for a glass of water but decided she should collect it herself, apart from the kitchen staff she saw no-one. Tammy returned to her room to work on the second task.

By four o'clock she was shattered, and upset, nagging doubts were returning. She closed her laptop down then laid on her bed for a moment, only waking an hour later when Andrea knocked on the door.

"Hey sleepyhead, are you staying there or coming downstairs?"

A reluctant Tammy slid off the bed and, still yawning, making her way to the door. Andrea caught Tammy as she started to fall, misjudging where the door frame was. Together they made it down to the sitting room without further incidence. Tammy sat in one of the armchairs and almost immediately nodded off.

Andrea gave up trying to wake her and warned Richard not to try either. Dinner was still fifteen minutes away.

Tammy eventually woke at half past six, just as everyone was leaving the table.

"Tammy dear, I wanted to wake you but Andrea told me I shouldn't."

"That's alright dad, I think I've worn myself out today."

"You really ought to have something to eat, I'll organise a tray for you."

"Okay."

Tammy picked at her food for almost an hour but it was plain she wasn't up for eating. At eight she excused herself and went to her room. Andrea followed a minute later and knocked gently on Tammy's door. She didn't wait for an invite and pushed the door open.

"Tammy, tell me what's wrong."

"I'm just tired."

"It's more than that, isn't it?"

"I don't know."

"Tammy, I've seen that look too many times before. You were tired yesterday, rightly so, but you would have recovered by this morning and not fall asleep twice in the afternoon like that. I want to know what's troubling you."

"Andrea, I'm worried. I'm worried that I won't be able to go back to school, even if the governors allow it. I had an email from a good friend," Tammy walked over to her laptop and powered it up, "I've told the sixth form about me, to stop the rumours, but there's one teacher who's going to make my life hell, and he's already tried once before."

"Have you told Elsie or your father?"

"Previously, yes, but not about today's email."

"You should, can I read the message then I'll call them?"

Tammy accessed her emails, while Andrea was reading John's message a few more arrived. One was from Ben apologising for what he'd said earlier, she imagined that John had pulled him aside for a quiet word. The other was a follow-up from John himself, the prefects were reporting that some of the lower years were spreading vile rumours, and a certain master was the common point of origin.

Tammy held her head in her hands, Andrea moved quickly to hug her, reaching for the phone on the writing desk she dialled the number for the sitting room.

"Elsie, can you and Richard come up to Tammy's room please."

Andrea hadn't let go of Tammy, still sat by the desk. Elsie and Richard arrived in under a minute, Andrea just waved them to the message on the screen. They read it, then Elsie reached over and forwarded it to herself. Returning to the inbox she saw the earlier message from John and forwarded that as well. Andrea had indicated that Tammy had agreed to her intervention.

Richard took over from Andrea, who went to the far side of the room with Elsie.

"This is why she's been upset, that first message was received an hour before I found her asleep. She's beyond being upset, this is bullying by proxy and now she doesn't know if she can go back to the school, even if everyone else agrees she can."

"Andrea, leave this with me. Don't say anything beyond the four of us. Can you give Tammy something?"

"Only paracetamol but it won't help the underlying problem, and that's not a medical issue. I'd rather she had nothing except water, no stimulants."

"I understand. Can you stay with Tammy whilst I speak to Richard downstairs, perhaps you can get her into bed where she'll be more comfortable?"

"I'll get that sorted."

Richard and Andrea moved Tammy onto the bed then Richard left, led by Elsie. Andrea spoke quietly to Tammy to tell her what she was doing, as Andrea removed Tammy's clothes and put her into a nightie. Tammy was asleep even before her head landed on the pillow.

Andrea followed the others down to the study where Elsie was re-reading the forwarded email. She picked up the phone and called her brother.

"Steven, yes I know it's late. I'm forwarding you an email and I want to see you tomorrow morning at nine. I'm going to call Harry and get him there as well. Yes it is serious otherwise I wouldn't be doing this."

She put the phone down, then phoned the chairman of the governing body, passing on the same information.

"Richard, Andrea, there's not much I can do before the morning. Andrea, can you check on Tammy when you turn in?"

"Of course."

Andrea went up to her room and put the TV on as she changed ready for bed.

She'd been watching some quiz show when she heard screaming from the next room. She ran into the bedroom, switching on the light as she entered, to see Tammy thrashing around on the bed. Andrea held Tammy while trying to wake her from an obvious nightmare.

"Tammy, Tammy, it's alright, you're safe."

She repeated this a few times before Tammy settled down then slowly opened her eyes.

"It was horrible, horrible." She started to cry.

By now her father and Elsie were in the doorway but Andrea waved them away. She helped Tammy sit up and put a glass of water to her lips. Tammy's nightie was damp where she'd been sweating so Andrea pulled the duvet back. She moved the pillows to keep Tammy from falling then went to the drawer to find another nightie.

Andrea got Tammy into the clean, dry, nightie and helped her into the bathroom to use the toilet. Tammy was now awake enough to be left for a minute while Andrea ran into her room for two paracetamol. Tammy was just walking back into the bedroom as Andrea returned. She swallowed the tablets then got back on the bed, Andrea sat next to her and straightened the pillows.

"Andrea, it was horrible. Don't leave me."

"I won't." Andrea walked to the door to switch off the lights, then slid into the bed next to Tammy, holding her tight.

Tamara's Début   Part Fifteen   by Shiraz

 
Wednesday 3rd December
 
As the dawn light shone through the windows in Tammy’s room, Andrea stirred. She stretched as her eyes opened, then slid out of the bed and quietly padded her way to her room. She used her own bathroom then pulled on a gown before walking back to Tammy’s room. Tammy herself was just opening her eyes and was mildly surprised to see Andrea standing in front of her.

“Good morning, Tammy. Did you sleep well?”

“Yes, but what are you doing in here?”

“You asked me to sleep with you because you were upset. I’ve only just got up.”

“I thought someone had been here, but when I felt, no-one was there.”

“That’s because I needed the loo, talking of which, get your pretty rear end in there then put a gown on, we’ll be late for breakfast otherwise.”

The two girls met Richard and Michael in the dining room and started on their cereal. Elsie came in a few minutes later — she’d been in the study on the phone.

“Sorry, everyone, I might not be in a good mood for the rest of the day; it’s nothing you’ve done. Please excuse me if I’m a bit off.”

Elsie sat down after that short speech and started on her breakfast; she hadn’t been in the dining room for five minutes when her mobile rang. She threw her napkin on the table and stormed into the study, slamming the heavy wooden door behind her.

Those remaining in the dining room decided to ignore what was happening and concentrate on the coffee and toast in front of them. They’d finished when Thomas came into the room.

“Mr Smart, sir, there is a delivery for you outside.”

Richard smiled and gestured that Tammy should follow him. On the gravel facing the front door was a Landrover Freelander 2; Tammy just stood and stared as Richard signed for the car and sent the delivery team away. He clicked the key remote and got in, Tammy slid into the front passenger seat; she wasn’t ready for the next surprise.

“As soon as your provisional driving licence arrives you can have a go."

She reached over and gave him a kiss. Richard stuttered over what he wanted to say next.

“How about we have a drive around, but only after you’ve put some clothes on!”

Tammy looked down at her gown, only to see that it had risen above her knees and was exposing just a little too much for decency. She hopped out of the car and, holding her gown tight, running straight upstairs to her room. Andrea had just emerged from her own room, dressed for the day, when Tammy flew past. She followed Tammy into her room.

“Don’t I get any privacy?”

“Not now you’ve slept with me!”

The two collapsed in laughter, Andrea then told Tammy what she probably didn’t want to hear.

“I’ve have to go back to London, I only had a couple of days off and I’m working again tomorrow morning. Your dad’s dropping me at the station in an hour, so get a move on.”

“I wish you didn’t have to.”

“Sorry, but I can’t take any more time off right now, but I wish I could. Your dad said something about you being in London soon, so maybe we can meet then?”

“Dad’s not said anything to me.”

“Get yourself washed and dressed, then we’ll sort out all of the world’s problems.”

Tammy walked down the stairs thirty minutes later to find her father tapping his foot, Andrea was next to him with a dour face.

“Hey, I wasn’t that long!”

Richard and Andrea both smiled. “Gotcha.”

They headed out to the new car, Richard drove carefully straight into town, stopping outside the station. He stepped out so he could retrieve Andrea’s case from the rear, while Andrea herself descended on to the kerb. Tammy hurriedly undid her seat-belt and went to Andrea, giving her a big hug.

“I wish you didn’t have to go.”

“Tammy, we’ve been through this before.”

“Yes, even so?”

“Look, I’ll see you in a week or so, right?”

Tammy and Andrea hugged briefly before Andrea walked to the ticket office, dragging her case, waving as she turned a corner. Tammy and Richard both returned to the car, Richard pulled away from the station and headed for the A9.

“Where are we going?”

“Wick.”

“Dad, what did Andrea mean?”

“We’re going to London next week for a few days.”

“Why?”

“We have to see our solicitor and I think you could do with a change of scenery. You might also want to pick up a few bits from home.”

“I don’t think of it as home, I haven’t thought of it as home for years.”

“Somehow I got that impression when you were last there, I suppose we’ll end up selling it when the divorce is through. It’s too big for the two of us anyway—it was too big for the three of us.”

They drove in silence along the A9, turning on to the A882 at Halkirk; on entering Wick they passed the hospital where Tammy had her recent CT scan. After crossing the bridge they parked by the river, then walked the short distance to the High Street. First stop was a coffee shop, although the real reason was a need for the toilet.

Over a latte, Tammy raised the new problems at school.

“Dad, I know I had to stop the rumours, but have I just started new ones? I mean, should I have kept quiet?”

“You can’t keep yourself hidden away, not if you want to go back to school, I don’t think you had a real choice, it's really a question of when, not if.”

“I know, but what about Mr Small?”

“Leave that to Elsie and the Headmaster.”

Suitably refreshed, they headed into town. Richard didn’t need much for himself, but grabbed a few bits of clothing. He’d arrived in Thurso ten days earlier with only a suitcase, so many of his clothes remained in Geneva—although Tanya, his PA, was arranging for their repatriation. This was another reason for the London visit.

Tammy, however, almost seemed to never wear the same clothes twice. Today’s trip was intended to divert her from the ongoing troubles in Thurso, but put a girl in a different clothes shop and she’ll try half of the stock on. Of course new shoes, accessories and (of course) undies were also needed.

While Richard was elsewhere Tammy walked into a lingerie shop and spoke with the sales assistant. A few minutes later she owned a more realistic pair of breast forms, but maintained her ‘B’ cup. She also picked up her first bikini.

Once reunited they both realised that a visit to the house in Edgware, North London, would put them within reach of the Brent Cross Shopping Centre as well as other retail parks. That was reason enough for Tammy to accompany her father for the trip south.

“Dad, I’m supposed to be helping Sarah at the shop this afternoon.” There was near panic in her voice.

“When was that arranged?”

“On Sunday, at the rehearsal. We really ought to get back.”

Richard helped carry some of the bags that Tammy had gathered in the past hour, she certainly wasn’t a slow shopper. They stopped for petrol before heading north-west across the Highlands towards Thurso. Richard dropped Tammy at the shop before heading back to the house. Tammy arrived there just as Sarah was about to call her.

“Where have you been? Everyone has said you’d be here, except I didn’t know.”

“Sorry, I thought you’d been told. I’ve been into Wick this morning, I needed a break, there’s been some more hassle at school.”

“So I heard, have you had any lunch?”

“Not yet.”

“Right, can you get us both a sandwich or something? A pastry would be good as well.”

Tammy headed round the corner to the bakery. She thought she recognised a girl in there.

“Tanya?”

“No, I’m Debbie, her sister. You must be Tammy.”

“Yes, how do you know?” Tammy was getting a little concerned, wondering if this conversation was a good idea.

“Our mum is Sandy, your hairdresser, she said I might see you.”

“Oh.” Tammy really was worried now, what if Joanne had said anything?

“Don’t worry, she’s really pleased how she got you out of that tomboy look. Now, did you come in here for anything?”

Tammy left the bakery a few minutes later with her purchases, Sarah noticed Tammy was flushed when she arrived back at the shop. Fortunately the shop was empty.

“Come on, out with it.”

“Out with what?”

“Don’t try it girl, who’s upset you now?”

Tammy recounted the short conversation, Sarah started to smile widely.

“Don't be silly, it's nothing to worry about but I meant to tell you Sandy wants to use you for some publicity shots, also the newspaper photographer will be there Friday for cast photos so you have an appointment with Sandy on Friday at two. I thought you knew Tanya was Sandy’s daughter?”

Tammy shook her head. Sarah thought it best not to tease Tammy any further so went to make them both a coffee. She was at the kettle when the bell sounded as the shop door was opened. Tammy walked from behind the counter to help the new customer.

“Hello Tammy, I was hoping to see you.”

“Oh, hi Jill. I thought you were a customer today, not a shrink.”

“A bit of both; any chance of a coffee?”

There was a muffled ‘yes’ from the storeroom. Jill spoke a little quieter so as not to be overheard.

“Tammy, I hear you had a bad day yesterday. Do you want to see me to discuss it?”

“I don’t think so, the problem is being dealt with.”

“So I understand.”

Tammy wondered where Jill’s information was coming from but decided to let the matter drop as Sarah was putting three coffees on the counter.

“Tammy, Sarah, I hear the ticket sales are going well. We’d planned three performances but we have now added a matinée on the Saturday and perhaps on the Sunday as well.”

“Five? I’m not sure.”

“Tammy, don’t worry, I know you can do it. Now, is there any chance of seeing you in your dress?”

Tammy looked at Sarah who gestured towards the storeroom. Hanging on a rail was a simple dress with a nipped waist, typical of the 1950’s. Tammy walked back in to the shop holding the frock.

“I hope you don’t want me to wear this today, I wasn’t prepared for it and don't have the right underwear.” The two women realised that Tammy was quite serious but any further discussion was interrupted by some of the show's cast arriving for measuring. They’d all given their sizes when they’d joined the production but now was the time to check for any slight changes, or fibs, in their measurements.

Sarah took charge of the tape measure whilst Tammy recorded the numbers on a sheet. She saw that hers and Tanya’s names were at the top of the page, and that her own measurements were typed, not handwritten.

Over the next few hours they saw almost all of the female cast, the rest would be seen that evening. Sarah locked the shop at five and offered to drive Tammy back home.

Back at the house Tammy found some mail in her room, one of which was post-marked Switzerland. Not wishing to be upset, Tammy put that aside for later. The other letters included a statement on her investments and confirmation of her appointment with Professor Roberts. Whilst there she checked her emails, the only personal mail was, once again, from John Hibbert.

Tammy,
 
I know I’ll see you tonight but in case we don’t get a chance to talk, I need to tell you about something strange that happened today, just before lunch. Firstly, Mr Small was taken out of my class by one of the Deputy Heads, Mr Thompson, whilst we were sent to the sixth-form common room.
 
Mr Thompson returned and said Mr Small would be taking a break from school, 'gardening leave' he called it, and that he would cover Mr Small’s A level and Highers classes. He then asked Tim Small to go down to the Head’s office. Me and another prefect decided to follow a few minutes later and walked into a blazing row between Tim and his father. Tim kept saying that he would stay at the school, whilst his father was insisting that he left as well.
 
The Head and several of the Governors came out of the conference room, the Head told Tim he had just earned detention, so had to go into the conference room to await further instruction. Mr Small was told to leave the premises, it didn’t look like he was taking leave after all. (I was told later that Gardening Leave is code for suspension.)
 
We were sent into the conference room as well, then Mr Thompson came in to speak to Tim, who was initially very upset, but cheered up soon afterwards. I haven’t had a chance to speak to Tim privately yet, so I’ll let you know later if there’s any more news.
 
Regards
 
John

Just then Tammy’s internal ’phone rang, calling her to dinner. She waited until after the meal before speaking about the day’s events.

“Elsie, I hear Mr Small has been suspended, is it because of me?”

“Partly, but there were other complaints which some of the boys had been frightened to make previously; it appears he has an attitude problem but I can’t go into that just now.”

“What about Tim Small?”

“I don’t know, that’s a matter for the Head.”

Tammy knew she’d not get any more information from Elsie and let it drop.

Michael was her driver for the night again, dropping Tammy at the theatre at six forty-five. Sarah was also there, and passed Tammy a measuring tape. Within ten minutes they had finished the task. The rehearsals then started in earnest, with a complete run through, pausing for two minutes where the set would be changed.

John walked quickly over to speak to Tammy.

“Did you get my email?”

Tammy nodded.

“I still don’t completely know what’s going on, Tim was in class this afternoon but left without speaking to anyone.”

“I tried to find out from Elsie McPherson what was going on,” Tammy said, “but she won’t say.”

“If I hear anything I’ll send you an email.”

“Okay.”

They were called to order and the rehearsal continued. Everyone had now learnt their lines, and very few cues were needed. The songs were also word perfect, just not note perfect. A few more of the supporting cast were asked to sing much quieter—if at all.

As they finished, Iain had a few words with them.

“Well done, everyone, for tonight’s effort, but I think you realise we have a little way to go with only eight days until the first performance. We’re going to have to pick up the pace slightly, so I want everyone back here tomorrow night, then Friday, Sunday afternoon, and Monday through Thursday evenings. That’s every day bar Saturday for the ones who weren’t paying attention.” He glanced at Tanya and John who were more interested in each other than what Iain was saying.

“Tomorrow most of you will be able to try your costumes and we’ll start full dress rehearsals on Friday. The newspaper photographer will be here Friday for the publicity shots for next Wednesday’s paper. They’ll also want to ask a few questions, we’ll get that out of the way before we start. Friday will be extended to 10pm to accommodate this.”

Tammy was beginning to feel a little unsure at this point but Iain dismissed them before she could dwell on it. She had meant to tell Iain about next week but clean forgot.

Michael was sitting outside waiting as Tammy left the theatre. She said very little on the ride home, Michael deciding not to ask any questions as he could sense something was wrong. Tammy rushed indoors and found Richard in the sitting room, the TV was showing a documentary, but no-one was really watching it.

“Dad, I think we have another problem.”

“What makes you think that?”

“The newspaper is taking our photos on Friday at the theatre, they’ll print the lies about me!” She started to cry.

“Tammy, I don’t think you have to worry too much about the paper,” Richard said, but Tammy continued to sob. “Tamara Smart, dry those eyes and listen to me.” It wasn’t a request.

“Yes, Dad.”

“As I said, I don’t think you need to worry much about the paper. Elsie and I have a majority shareholding in the parent company, I’d clean forgotten but I received my annual report today. Elsie knew about the shares but the company only acquired the Thurso Echo a month ago and the new management team wasn’t in place until this week.”

“So?”

“The previous editor has been moved to a different part of the group, there’s a new guy there with clear instructions not to upset the board of directors, that includes you. Apart from that, I don’t think John McPherson will be a problem for a while.” Richard handed his daughter the current week’s paper. The headline was:

School Catering Manager Fined

Tammy skimmed the article: he’d been in court the day before and had been fined £2,500 for breaches of environmental health regulations. He had protested he couldn’t pay it so an order was made to have it deducted from any benefits payments he received, plus he would do twenty hours of community service a week for six months, or until he had paid the fine in full. The school had been given a fine of £100 for failing to supervise him adequately.

She relaxed a little, things were not quite as difficult as she’d thought. Then she yawned and said she was on her way to bed. That effectively ended her Wednesday evening.
 
 
Thursday/Friday 4th/5th December
 
Thursday started with Tammy doing her schoolwork, ending with another rehearsal. She didn’t get a chance to speak to John Hibbert at the theatre during the evening and there was no email with new information.

Friday started much the same with schoolwork taking up the morning. This was interrupted a couple of times by deliveries of fresh coffee, plus the day’s post. One envelope, post-marked Swansea, was of immediate interest.

Tammy tore open the envelope to find her provisional driving licence. She put the plastic photocard in her purse and the paper licence with her personal papers. She wanted to tell her father but he had gone out earlier and wouldn’t be back until the afternoon.

She took lunch in her room and kept working until one thirty. She remembered that she had a hair appointment with Sandy at two and went looking for a driver. The house was empty, she was about to return to her room to phone Sandy when Thomas appeared.

“Miss Smart, I understand you are due in town in half an hour.”

“Yes Thomas, unfortunately I have no transport.”

“I ordered you a taxi a few minutes ago, it should be here shortly.”

“Thank you.”

Tammy ran back up the stairs and located certain purchases from Wednesday morning. She removed the existing enhancers from her bra and inserted the new forms, her figure instantly improved. Tammy grabbed her coat and went down to the sitting room to wait. She wasn’t there more than five minutes when the taxi drew up. The only words she exchanged with the driver were to confirm her destination and, on arrival, the fare.

“Tammy, let me take your coat, Karen’s waiting for you at the sink. Can I get you a drink?”

“Coffee please.”

Tammy was sat in front of Sandy a few minutes later, a towel wrapped around her head.

Over the next hour Sandy worked on Tammy’s hair, whilst Sandy’s tongue never stopped. Tammy was pressed for information but stopped short of admitting her previous existence. Sandy sensed Tammy was holding back.

“Tammy dear, I know you’re trying hard not to tell me everything, but I know most of it anyway, I knew the first time Sarah asked me to sort you out.”

Tammy didn’t know what to say, so said nothing.

“Look, I don’t judge people, I just take as I see. You are a good looking girl, that is what I can see. Whether or not you are, or used to be, a boy is irrelevant. Anyway, Joan Small came in this morning, are you interested in what she said?”

“Isn’t that a breach of hairdresser confidence?”

“Perhaps, but in this case she asked me to pass on a message as I might have mentioned that you were coming in this afternoon.”

“Oh.”

“She said her husband, George, had behaved like an ass. She’s told him to move out, and told me it was a temporary separation while they sort out their issues, but I think she really meant it was permanent. Anyway, there was a huge bust up on Wednesday, George wanted to take Tim with him, away from the school, but Tim didn’t want to leave. Apparently the head gave him detention so he couldn’t leave the premises then cancelled it, after George had left. The governors have apparently agreed that Tim can remain at the school.”

“That explains some of what I heard.”

“Yes, but here’s the interesting bit. George is a big homophobe, and Tim's said he is gay but could never tell his father, or anyone at the school. It was your courage in telling the school about yourself that persuaded Tim to tell his father on Wednesday morning.”

“Woah.”

“It sounds like you have plenty of friends at that school, when are you going back?”

“January, hopefully.”

“Good, they need you. Now, the photographer is due in fifteen minutes, why don’t you have another coffee and wait with my daughters?”

Tammy looked around to see Tanya and Debbie who were now sat behind her, to say she blushed would be an understatement. Sandy however had pulled the chair out, forcing Tammy to stand. Tanya stood and walked over.

“Tammy, don’t worry we won’t bite.” She gave Tammy a kiss on the cheek. “Come and sit down.”

“How long have you known?”

“Since the boy who collected the pastries became the girl.”

“You never said anything at the theatre.”

“No need to, and not the place for a private conversation.”

Tammy looked around the salon, there were at least six more people within earshot of this private conversation.

“Anyway, you’re much better as a girl, and thanks for introducing me to John—he’s a sweetie. He thinks a lot of you, too.”

“No trouble.”

“Perhaps I can help you find the right boy?”

“Slow down, I mean I don’t know.”

“Don’t know what? Oh, if you like boys or girls?”

“Yes.” Tammy was talking quieter now. Any further questioning was halted by the arrival of a man in his fifties carrying a tripod.

“Girls, let’s tidy you up a bit, then we’ll get the photos done.” Sandy was in her element.

Tammy wasn’t sure about the photographer and, if she’d been on her own, probably wouldn’t have hung around. Sandy, however, supervised everything; she was paying for the photos after all. The photos were not only in the salon, they also went for a walk around the town, stopping every few yards when the photographer decided it was a good spot. It took over an hour but eventually Sandy and the photographer were happy.

“Tanya, I’ll see you at the theatre.”

“Okay, Tammy, take care.”

Tammy walked round to Sarah’s but the shop was closed. She was just wondering what to do when her mobile rang.

“Hello?”

“Do you want a ride home?”

“Yes please, Dad. Where are you?”

Richard was waiting just around the corner. Tammy told her father about her afternoon but her father said nothing about his day. Tammy had just ninety minutes before she had to be back at the theatre, but she first had to send John Hibbert an email with what she’d learnt—in confidence of course. That done, she went down for dinner.

At the theatre, once Tammy walked through the stage door, she headed for Iain the director.

“Iain, we might have a problem.”

“You’re pregnant and your doctor’s told you not to do the show?”

“Not exactly, my father and I have to go to London for a few days next week. We’re leaving Sunday afternoon and we’ll be back on Wednesday afternoon.”

“When did you find this out?”

“On Wednesday, but I haven’t had a chance to speak to you.”

“Do you have to go with your father?”

“Yes, my parents are divorcing and I need to see the solicitor as I own the London house.”

“You own the house? What else?”

“Not sure, a few companies? I probably need to see my accountant too.” Tammy laughed.

“Getting back to the issue, apart from tonight you’ll only be at one more rehearsal, next Wednesday.”

“What about Thursday?”

“That’s now going to be the press and invited guests performance.”

“Oh.”

“As it happens, I was already going to let everyone know there’s an extra rehearsal on Saturday afternoon at three, I don’t think you’ll need it but it’ll help the rest of the cast. I think we’ll cope the times you aren’t here as it's the supporting cast that really need it.”

The rest of the evening passed without issue, the cast tried on their costumes and one-by-one the main characters were photographed then interviewed. The press questioning mostly centred on prior acting experience and future aspirations, Tammy answered honestly about school plays but declined to say which school.

The rehearsal itself felt different. The set was now finished and virtually everyone was in their costume. The lighting rig was set, the technician had the lighting plan down. Tammy, Tanya and the other soloists were fitted with radio mics and heard themselves through the monitors.

Tammy hadn’t been aware of the other, non acting, people working on the play, but now appreciated it took everyone else to make the cast look and sound good. Just as the rehearsal ended she saw Tim Small climb down from the gallery. She walked over to him.

“Tim, how are you?”

It took Tim a few moments to work out who was asking the question, but when John appeared at Tammy’s shoulder he relaxed.

“Tammy, I presume. I’m proud of you, what you’ve done.”

“Tim, I was worried about you.”

“Me too.” John felt he had to say something.

“Yeah, sorry I haven’t been able to say much but my father was being a total prat for saying those things about you. I don’t suppose he enjoyed it when I came out.”

“You told him you were gay?”

“Yes, but that wasn't exactly true. You see, I’m like you——”

Tamara's Début   Part Sixteen   by Shiraz

 
 
Friday 5th December Continued
 

John didn’t know what to say after their friend’s revelation; Tammy just took Tim’s hand.

“Tim, I think it’s too late to talk now, why don’t you come down to Sarah’s Boutique tomorrow morning, your mum should know where it is?”

“I’ll do that, thank you.” Tim was openly crying, Tammy took a tissue and had him dry his eyes. She gave him a hug but had to leave as her father was waiting a few feet away, unknowingly stood with Tim’s mother.

On the ride home Tammy didn’t want to say what she knew but her father tried anyway.

“Who was that boy? Was he from your school?”

“Yes.”

“What’s his name?”

“Tim.”

“Is he in the sixth form?”

“Yes.”

“I take it you don’t want to have this conversation.”

“Yes, Dad.”

Richard guessed he would not get any more out of Tammy so the rest of the ride was in silence. Once indoors Tammy went to the kitchen and made herself a coffee, she was becoming a little uncomfortable using staff for seemingly everything. Upstairs in her room she knew she couldn’t go straight to sleep, there was just too much going on in her head.

She booted her laptop and sent a message to John, simply asking him for Tim’s personal email address. She then checked her inbox. Sarah had left a message asking Tammy to be there at nine, there was also one from her mother in Tom’s inbox.

Tom,
 
I phoned the school and spoke to someone in the school office, I think she was a temp. Anyway she said there wasn’t a Tom Smart at the school. What’s going on? You haven’t been answering your phone and I’m getting a little worried. I hope you’re not still with the McPhersons, I’m seriously thinking of coming over to collect you, please respond.
 
Your mother

Tammy looked at the message but decided not to reply until she’d spoken to her father. Tammy's letter to her mother had been posted the day before so wouldn't arrive until after the weekend, plenty of time for her mother to do something silly.

Tammy checked her phone next. There were no missed calls shown so she tried to check the call menu but none of the buttons would work. She removed the battery then switched the phone back on, this time there was apparently no signal. This was something to sort out in the morning. Tammy then closed down the laptop and finished her coffee before changing for bed. She set an alarm for seven and was asleep within a few minutes.
 
 
Saturday 6th December
 
It seemed like the alarm was going off almost as soon as she’d set it. The room was dark apart from the glow of her clock. She switched on the bedside light and dragged herself into the bathroom. Ten minutes later she was fresh and very awake. A coffee was standing on her bedside cabinet, how does that happen? Right now she was thankful to the staff.

She dressed warmly for the day then headed down for breakfast, her father was just coming out of his own room.

“Good morning.”

“Hi, Dad.” They walked into the dining room together where a pot of coffee and glasses of OJ were waiting. “I had an email from mum last night.”

“What did she say?”

Tammy recounted the brief email, showing that she was a little perturbed by it.

“I think we both knew your mother would find out one way or another, although I accept that we’ve just been lucky so far. I spoke to Gerald about this yesterday, he has written to her solicitor with a copy of the statutory declaration and the medical letters as we agreed.”

"Should we have waited until Mum challenged us?”

“If we did that, we would still end up having to send the paperwork. This way, if they challenge your state of mind, they already have the psychiatric reports. As it is, it would require a court order for her to insist you should see another shrink, and the chances of that are as likely as the Dodo returning.”

“I suppose so.” They both reached for the toast and concentrated on the morning's meal.

“I’ve booked some Saturday morning driving lessons for you, starting in a few weeks if the weather's okay.”

“Thanks, I’d like to be able to take myself down to town, previously I would have used the school minibus today.”

“We’ll sort out something for you.”

Elsie was walking into the room. “Not a problem, I need to go into town to get my hair done. I’ll take you down there.”

Tammy arrived at the shop as Sarah was turning the sign around, a bit of sign language sent Tammy towards the bakery. She realised however that she was short of cash so turned the other way to use an ATM. As she approached it she saw John McPherson coming towards her, he was twenty yards away,

His head was down but he looked up just in time to see Tammy turning on her heels and walking briskly away.

“Come here you pervert!” He broke into a run, continuing to call after Tammy, his language becoming fouler by the second.

Tammy now started to run herself, but this wasn’t easy in a long skirt and heels on icy cobbles. John was easily gaining on her.

She turned a corner and ran straight into Tim Small and his mother. As Tammy stopped to avoid crashing into them, John McPherson managed to catch up and swung his open palm at Tammy’s face. She tried to duck, turning sharply, but came crashing to the ground as a heel gave way.

John managed one kick at Tammy as she lay there before Tim put John on the ground, knocking his legs from under him. Joan helped Tammy up as John tried to grab Tim’s leg, being the nearest at that time. Tim easily stepped out of the way and headed away from the pathetic man on the floor, still swearing at the three of them as they quickly walked to Sarah’s shop, Tammy hobbling.

Joan pushed the door open so the three could enter. Tammy reached for the lock as soon as the door was closed.

“Tammy, what’s going on?”

Tammy was too upset to say anything, she was now on the floor trying to get her shoes off but struggling, her anger was evident; Tim crouched down to helped Tammy.

Outside John had now reached the doorway and was rattling the glass door. Failing to open it he started banging the glass with his fist. Behind him other people, some of whom were Sarah’s customers, had gathered. A few were shouting at John to stop. Sarah, meanwhile, was on the phone to the police.

Tim helped Tammy to her feet and guided her towards a chair at the back of the shop. Joan meanwhile, unaware what Sarah was doing, had pulled out her mobile phone and was in the process of telling the police about an assault on her son and his friend.

John stopped banging on the glass long enough to hear a siren in the distance. He looked at the crowd behind him and started to walk away.

“No you don’t!”

That solicited a profanity by John.

“Stop right there.” John kept walking, ignoring the man in jeans and heavy winter coat who was following him, using a mobile phone to call his office.

The siren was much closer now and suddenly ceased. John started walking faster, but didn’t run. He stopped as he reached down to hold his leg, apparently in pain, and didn’t see the two uniformed officers coming towards him until the last second. He spun around to go back up the road, straight into the arms of the off-duty PC Stuart St James. John McPherson was arrested for assault, cuffed and read the caution in the space of a few seconds. He was still shouting expletives, continuing his tirade against ‘that pervert’ as they walked him to the car, so he was also arrested for a public order offence.

Stuart St James spoke to one of the uniformed officers then walked back to Sarah’s shop. He tapped on the glass, holding up his warrant card. Sarah walked over and unlocked the door to let him in, latching it behind him.

“Mrs Bonney, I’m not on duty but I’d like you to know that John McPherson is under arrest.” There was an audible sigh of relief.

“You will be receiving a visit from an officer who will want to take your statements. Miss Smart, I understand you were the subject of an assault?” Tammy nodded, Tim was holding Tammy’s hand and seemingly oblivious to PC St James’ words. “I’ll be on my way, I’ve been told I also need to give a statement, given the circumstances.”

He left the shop, Sarah again locked the door and made certain the Closed sign was showing. Tammy was feeling a bit less wound up so decided that everybody could do with tea or coffee; it would help distract her. She went through to the back of the shop whilst Joan spoke to Sarah and sorted out the introductions.

“Sarah, you’ve not met him before but this is Tim, he’s at school with Tammy.”

“Hello Tim.” Tim looked slightly uncomfortable, Sarah picked up on this. “Tim, why don’t you give Tammy a hand.”

Tim went to the rear of the shop, Joan continued.

“Tim is very proud of Tammy, about what she’s done, and it’s inspired him to come out as well.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t have guessed,” Sarah was genuinely surprised.

“Neither did I, not before Wednesday. Tim wanted to see Tammy this morning after he told her last night. I don’t know anything about all this so I’m frightened for Tim, even more so after what happened this morning.”

“Tammy’s a survivor, she’ll recover very quickly from this, especially as the lousy toad is under arrest. I have no doubt she’ll help Tim. Does he have a female name yet?”

“No, I haven’t asked. How long have you known about Tammy?”

“Ages, if you recall she has been working here each Saturday, as Tammy, for several months.”

Tim fetched the milk from Sarah’s little fridge while Tammy poured boiling water on the teabags. Tim wanted to talk to Tammy about himself but, after his revelation the previous evening, didn’t know what to say next. Tammy took the cups for Joan and Sarah into the shop but left hers and Tim’s cups in the back.

“Tim, how certain are you about yourself?”

“Very, I’ve felt for years that there was a girl inside me but I’ve had to keep her hidden. I couldn’t tell anyone, especially my father, but yesterday I felt I just had to tell mum, it just got too much after what my father said about you, it was as if he hated me even though he didn’t know.”

“Have you told anyone else?”

“No, only you and John Hibbert know, plus Sarah by now I presume.”

“Unfortunately, once a few people know the number grows and grows. I know that from my own experience.”

“I wished it wouldn’t, I mean I don’t want to look like a boy in a frock and have them laugh at me.”

“Tim, it took me months before I would even think about stepping outside this storeroom as Tammy, just don’t rush into anything around Thurso but out of town would be easier.”

“But you make it look so natural, how can anyone—I mean, why was John McPherson after you?”

“He found out about me before I was willing to say anything to him, he wanted to date me until he realised I wasn’t a real girl. I had to get an injunction to stop my name going out in the newspaper and over the radio or on the telly.”

“I hadn’t realised. So what’s his problem now?”

“As you know, he was in charge of the school kitchens and found responsible for the food poisoning. He has been sacked from the school because of that. The local authority then took him to court because of the school kitchens. Somehow he sees me as responsible for his demise.”

“I suppose he’ll get the front page news now?”

“I reckon so. Hold on a minute.”

Tammy pulled out her mobile and tried to call her father, but there was still no signal. Tim offered his phone.

“Dad, it's me. It's an emergency, I broke a heel, can you bring down the long boots? Thanks. Bye.”

“Thanks for that, Tim, I won’t be able to go anywhere without something on my feet. Did you see where the heel went?”

“I picked it up.” He replied, putting his hand in his pocket.

“Thanks, now I can’t keep calling you Tim, can I?”

“No, it’s Angela, but not when others are around, okay? Mum doesn’t know yet, either.”

“I understand. Can you do me a favour, Angela, take these round to the heel bar in the High Street please? I was on my way to the bank when I saw John so I don’t have any money yet, but I don’t think you’ll need any in advance. I also need a new phone, but that can wait for now.”

“For you, anything.” Angela took the shoe and was going to leave through the shop door but Tammy unlocked the rear door and let her out that way. Tammy walked back into the shop as a man came to the shop door. Sarah indicated that she was closed but the man held up a Police warrant card. Sarah let him in, locking the door again.

They all moved to the rear of the shop, out of sight of the windows, Tammy organised chairs and switched the kettle back on. The officer announced himself as Detective Constable Franklin.

“Any relation to Sandy Franklin?” Tammy asked.

“Yes, she’s my wife.”

“I know her from the theatre. I’m playing Anita in West Side Story.”

“In that case, you must be Tammy.”

“Guilty as charged,” which generated a little laughter.

“Now, can I confirm everyone’s name and address. I believe there was a young lad involved?”

“My son, Tim, he was back here with Tammy.”

“Sorry, he went to the heel bar for me, he’ll be back shortly.”

DC Franklin took the personal details then asked for a description of what had happened, starting from the moment Tammy went to the ATM until John McPherson walked away from the shop. Each of them had something to say, including Tim, who had returned in the midst of everything.

It took an hour before each of them had told their story and signed the statements. Richard arrived halfway through the proceedings with Tammy’s boots and was not happy when he found out what was going on.

“Why didn’t you tell me, young lady?”

“One it wasn’t my phone I was using, two you weren’t here and couldn’t have done anything and three you’d only have worried and started calling our solicitor.”

“Even so, you should have told me.”

“Mr Smart, do you mind if I let Mrs Small finish her statement before there are any more discussions?” The DC was quite insistent. Richard was plainly chastised.

“Not at all, please carry on.”

The Detective Constable left ten minutes later with four signed statements, Richard had eventually calmed down after a mug of tea had been placed in his hands. Indeed the rest of them had decided to have another cup each, after Richard was sent to the bakery to get some cakes. Tammy still hadn’t been to the bank.

Sarah decided at eleven that there was no point in opening up before lunchtime, they all needed a little time to calm down. Tammy suggested they met in Frances’ hotel bar at midday, Sarah declined but Joan and Angela said they’d be there after Tammy gave directions.

Although her protagonist was in a cell Tammy was a little unsure. She held her father’s arm as they walked to the bank so she could withdraw some money. Instead of using the ATM outside the branch they walked into the lobby, but the inside ATM now bore an 'Out of Order' sign. She walked up to the sole cashier and handed over her card, asking for £100. A badge declared that he was 'Robert'.

“You should use the cash-point.”

“I don’t want to, not today.”

“I can’t do cash withdrawals under £200 over the counter.”

“Please don’t argue with me, can you not give me my £100? I don’t want to carry £200 around with me.”

“I’m afraid not, it's a new bank policy.”

Tammy was getting a little angry but her father was not paying attention as he was checking the posters on the walls, to see if they were out of date.

“Who is the duty manager?”

“Why?”

“Because I want to complain.” She spoke the last word louder than the rest.

“Tammy, what’s up?” Her father finally hear Tammy's raised voice.

“He is refusing to give me £100. Please let me handle this dad, I don’t want special treatment today.”

“Okay.” Her father took a step backwards.

“Now, Robert, I have had a traumatic day so far and all I want is a measly £100. I do not want to use the cash-point and unless you are going to change your mind, I will have to complain.”

There was movement from behind the counter and Mr Doherty the branch manager appeared, Robert quickly explained the problem.

“I’m afraid my assistant is quite correct. I must insist you use the cash-point.” He went to hand the card to Tammy then noticed Richard loitering. Mr Doherty stopped and looked at the name on the card, he spoke to Robert and withdrew.

“My manager has authorised this transaction Miss Smart. I’ll just process it.”

“You could have done this all along. You could even have asked me why I didn’t want to use the ATM, as I would have told you I had been chased from it then assaulted this morning.” She signed the slip.

“I didn’t know.”

“No, because you didn’t ask, you just imposed the bank policy blindly.” Tammy accepted her card and cash, putting them into her purse. “For the record, seeing as you decided not to tell me, I happen to know that the manager’s name is Doherty.”

Tammy turned and walked out, her father joined her on the street.

“You could have shown him your staff ID.”

“Yes Dad, I could have, but then he would still have imposed that inconsiderate rule on everyone who wasn’t one of the staff. This way he might learn a little about flexibility.”

“I see.”

“Yes, I’ve decided I can’t cure every problem, or live my life, by pulling rank.”

They walked to the nearby mobile phone store. In contrast to the lousy time she'd spent in the bank, Tammy spent ten relaxed minutes there having her phone replaced. Most of that time was choosing the make and model. The battery held some charge, as soon as she switched it on the phone beeped several times with voicemail messages, which she ignored for now.

They next headed round to the heel bar to collect Tammy’s shoe then onto the hotel, they met Joan and Angela outside.

“Good afternoon ladies, Sirs. What can I get you?” Tammy had the feeling that a few glasses of wine would relax everyone but there were two drivers in the small group and two others who had to be at the theatre in a few hours. She ordered Highland water whilst the menus were handed out.

Very little was said before their lunch orders were taken, each had chosen sandwiches, Joan tried to start but couldn’t find the words

“Tammy, how, er, how did?”

“How did I know?”

“Yes.”

“That’s difficult to say, I didn’t have a sister to compare myself with but I’ve suppose I’ve always felt this way.” She looked at her father before continuing, “it just seemed natural that I knew I was a girl inside. I tried not show it, but apparently I didn’t act like a typical boy.”

Angela nodded and picked up the thread; “I wanted to be like my sister, she’s two years older than me. I thought I was jealous of her clothes but it was more than that, she was my role model. I had to pretend to be the boy that dad expected to see. I was mad when he got the job at the school, but then I’d never have met you.”

Joan opened her mouth and shut it again—her son had never said anything like this before.

“Angela, you just need to be yourself, don’t copy anyone.”

It took Joan a few seconds to work out what Tammy meant. “Angela?”

Angela nodded. Tammy continued, “Mrs Small, if there’s anything I can do to support your daughter, please let me help her.”

Frances had hovered until Tammy finished speaking, then began to put plates in front of the small group. “Ladies, Sir, there we are. Is there anything else you need?”

There was a silence hanging in the air as Frances walked away.

“Did I just hear that?” Joan looked uncertain.

“Yes.” Richard responded.

“I’m done for.” Angela groaned, putting her head in her hands.

“No you’re not, Frances is sweet and wouldn’t say anything. He’s just accepted you without a problem, did you see him laugh or anything?”

“No.” Angela was sniffling. Joan reached in her bag and handed her brand new daughter a tissue. “Thanks, Mum.”

“Angela, you will draw more attention to yourself if you react like that to everyone.”

They ate quietly, an elderly couple were sat at an adjacent table, sharing a pot of tea, so discussion was muted.

Tammy looked at her father who seemed to realise what Tammy was thinking.

“Joan, Tammy and I are going to spend a few days in London. How about Angela joining us?”

“But, Mum, I’ve got school.”

“I think you could be excused on the grounds of emotional distress.” Tammy suggested.

“If that’s okay, Mum?”

“I think the Head would understand.” Joan was starting to think this might be a good idea.

“Good, when are you leaving?” asked Angela.

Richard seemed to have it all organised. “The flight’s at three thirty-five from Wick, we’ll leave the house at two. Don’t forget your passport. Perhaps you both can come across for lunch at midday?”

Tammy stood up to go to the loo, Angela followed but stopped as Tammy reached the door to the Ladies. Tammy beckoned Angela but she shook her head and went into the Gents. A few minutes later they met up outside.

“Tammy, I couldn’t. You might see me as a girl but everyone else sees a boy.”

“I see we need to do some work.”

They returned to Joan and Richard who were deep in conversation. Fortunately the old couple had left so they didn’t need to whisper.

“Tammy, what time are you due at the theatre?”

“At three, Dad. If you want to leave the two of us in town we can walk round to the theatre.”

“That’s fine by me,” Joan was in agreement.

Richard paid for the lunch and the four walked out of the door into the cold air. Richard and Joan headed for their cars, Tammy and Angela for Sarah’s shop.

The shop was busy, plenty of people asking about the morning’s events. Of course, as soon as Tammy and Angela arrived they became the centre of attention. Tammy and Sarah both introduced Angela as Tim — it was simpler given the circumstances. They repeated the story for a few minutes but escaped to the storeroom when Angela was obviously uncomfortable with all the attention.

“Right, Angela, I want you to get your coat and jumper off, then loosen your trousers and drop them.”

“Why?”

“I want to get your measurements.”

“What for?”

“So we know what size clothes to get you.”

Angela shook her head but did as Tammy asked. Tammy proceeded to run the tape measure all over Angela.

“Hmm, size twelve, a B cup will suffice. Get your clothes back on.”

“Tammy, why did your dad ask about my passport?”

“It’s the new regulations, haven’t you flown before?”

“No, we always drove. Dad said it was cheaper.”

They headed out into Thurso. It was gone half past one and very overcast, there wasn’t any snow but it was currently below freezing. Tammy dragged Angela into a clothes shop and headed for the women’s section.

“Tammy, I can’t do this!” Tammy was holding a skirt up against Angela, checking the length.

“Look, if anyone asks it’s for your sister who’s the same height as you.”

“Would that work?”

“Possibly. Now, stand still.”

Tammy went round the store and picked up enough outfits for three days plus six sets of underwear and hosiery. She added a couple of nighties to the pile and headed to the cash desk.

“Tammy, I can’t afford this.”

“I know.”

Tammy paid for the pile of clothing and left Angela standing by the till, holding the bags, while Tammy went to find a long coat, scarf and gloves that just screamed ‘girl’. She paid for these and pushed Angela back into the street.

They dropped the bags with Sarah then went to a shoe store. This was when Angela did walk out and got upset with Tammy outside.

“Why are you doing this?”

“Because I want to help you. If you want to be a girl then you have to learn what it means to be a girl, lesson one is shopping.”

“But they’ll look at me if I try those shoes on.”

“No they won’t, not unless you make a spectacle of yourself. Now, lets get you a pair of boots.”

Angela went back into the shop, Tammy led her to the boots display. First she measured Angela’s foot size, then removed his thick socks.

“What did you do that for?”

“Let me put these on, otherwise we’ll get the wrong size. Tammy reached in one of the bags and pulled out a new pair of knee highs, rolling them up Angela’s leg as far as she could.

Tammy then measured again. “Hmmm, size seven.”

She pulled several pairs of boots off the racks and tried them, getting Angela to stand. She deliberately kept the heel low, no need to frighten her.

“Sit down, we’ll take these pairs.” Angela went to put her socks back on.

“Stop right there. I’ll be back in a minute.”

Angela felt very self-conscious without Tammy fussing over her and was relieved when she returned a minute later. She was less pleased when she saw what it was.

“I can’t wear those!” She whispered.

“Yes you can, now try these on.”

“Can I help you at all?” An assistant wandered over.

“No thanks, we’re doing fine although my boyfriend isn’t looking forward to the fancy dress party.”

Angela was blushing bright red.

“I understand. What about the boots?”

“Oh, I’m taking this pair and that pair.”

“I’ll put the rest away, by the way those sandals suit you, sir.”

Angela again did her very best not to cry at that point. Tammy slipped the black sandals off Angela’s feet and only then gestured that she should put her socks and shoes back on, but slapped her hand when she began to take off the knee high stockings.

"Get used to them."

Tammy left Angela to sort herself out as she went to the cash-desk to pay for the three pairs. There was a quizzical look by the assistant when she noticed the boots and the sandals were all size seven but all she got from Tammy was a smile.

Outside, and a suitable distance away, Angela was very upset.

“I could have been thrown out of there, I mean how embarrassing was that. She knew, she knew!”

“Calm down, if she did know then she wouldn’t say anything, a sale is a sale and she’s probably on commission. Look, if you put on that kind of display when you’re in a skirt then you will definitely be the centre of attention. Let’s get these back to Sarah's shop.”

“Good, then we can sit down.”

“Not likely, do you have a flight case?”

“No.”

“Right, we’ll get one plus some toiletries, your skin needs a deep clean.”

Angela shrugged and followed Tammy into Boots. They left twenty minutes later a selection of cleansers, wipes, make-up and some panty-liners. Angela shook her head when those appeared in the basket.

Next they went to the department store and into the luggage section. Tammy chose a purple case and a shoulder bag for Angela before they made their way back to the shop. By now if was almost half-past two. She put the kettle on for coffee then phoned a taxi firm.

They finished their coffee as their transport arrived. The driver loaded the shopping into the back as the girls got in.

“Where to, love?”

“Can you drop us at the theatre then take the shopping to the McPherson’s house?” She handed him a piece of paper with the address, accompanied by a tenner.

Five minutes later they were inside the theatre. Angela stopped Tammy, “please remember that when I'm here I’m Tim.”

“Yes, Angela,” she giggled.

Tammy quickly changed into her costume in the girls' dressing room before heading onto the stage. John Hibbert was waiting there for her.

“How’s Tim?”

“Angela’s fine.”

“Angela?”

“Yes. Her name’s Angela — but not yet in school. By the way she won’t be in school before Thursday next week. The official reason is emotional distress because of her family problems.”

“I think I understand, where will Tim—err—Angela be?”

“With me and my dad in London.”

The rehearsal went well, Iain tried to persuade Tammy to stay in Thurso the following week but she insisted she had to go. He was less impressed with Tim’s announcement.

“You as well? Is Tammy your girlfriend?”

"Not at all but she is a good friend. Unfortunately my father has left my mum so it's not a good time right now. Tammy's father offered to give me a break in London for a few days while my mum sorts some things out."

“You’ll be back on Wednesday?”

“Yes, definitely.”

Tammy arrived home exhausted after the rehearsal, she stayed awake enough for dinner but retired to her room by half-past seven. Angela’s shopping was stacked in a corner.

Tamara's Début   Part Seventeen   by Shiraz

 
 
Sunday 7th December
 

Tammy woke early on Sunday morning and found out very quickly that she was in extreme discomfort. Tammy shifted herself under the duvet, attempting to turn so she could look at the clock. For her efforts she receiving a shot of pain through her back. Now fully awake, and with a pressing need, she dragged herself into the bathroom to relieve herself.

Once she'd climbed back onto the bed she glanced at the clock, seeing it was six thirty; definitely far too early for a Sunday morning. Thinking she might regret her next action she picked up the bedside extension and called her father's room.

"Dad, I might not be able to go today," she briefly explained that she was in pain, her father was there, in his PJ's, within a minute.

"Let me have a look." Tammy rolled over, tugging at her nightie and let him see her back, there was now a large purple bruise, easily the size of a fist, in the small of her back. Richard dropped her nightie and had her turn back over.

"That's not good but I hope it's not going to be a problem, although I think you might need some painkillers; I'll let Elsie know. I'm also going to call the police station."

"Thanks Dad, I'm not sure if that's necessary, but is there any chance of a coffee and a bottle of paracetamol?"

"Coffee yes, bottle no, but maybe a couple of tablets."

"Since I'm wide awake, could you pass me my laptop, phone and that mail please."

"I suppose you'll want breakfast in bed as well?" Richard was being a little sarcastic.

"Yes, please," Tammy gave him the best smile she could manage, a hug was out of the question right now.

Richard left to shower and dress, having spoken to the kitchen staff. Tammy's coffee and pills arrived a few minutes later. Tammy first dealt with her mobile. It now had a fully charged battery but she reluctantly noted that the message symbol was flashing. There were three voicemail messages, all from her mother, along the lines of "call me." Tammy deleted all three.

Next she opened the post, firstly there was a letter from her Headmaster confirming the arrangements that had been agreed a week earlier, Tammy could never understand why such things took so long, then she remembered the comment by her mother about a 'temp'. There were also some bank statements, which she skimmed then put to one side. Lastly, in dread, she opened the plain envelope from Switzerland. It was not what she expected.

"Congratulations, you have won a prize in our lottery ..."

Tammy screwed up the letter and threw it in the direction of the waste paper basket, missing badly. The moment her arm stretched out, however, she regretted the action. She was less than quiet as the pain hit her.

It seemed just a moment later that Elsie and her father were in her room.

"You heard me then."

"Yes, what were you doing?"

Tammy angrily pointed at the crumpled letter, now lying against the far wall. Her pain was forgotten for a short while, "how did they get this address?"

"I don't know but you should take it easy dear; I've called Dr Hoskins, he'll be here in an hour when he's had his own breakfast. Now, how's your appetite?"

"Fine I think."

"Right, I'll have something sent up, but don't expect the works, we're eating dinner at one o'clock today, please don't forget we'll have guests."

The pair walked out the door, Elsie plainly in charge, Tammy was left to her laptop.

Tammy thought carefully before she knew how to write what was clearly going to be a difficult reply to her mother’s earlier email.

Mum,
 
I don't know about the temp, but I've just had a letter from the Head that took a week to get to me. The doctor has signed me off again for a few more weeks but I'm still doing the schoolwork. Dad is looking after me, he's taken some extra time off work.
 
Hope you're alright, weather here is freezing, possibly even colder.
 
Tom

It hurt Tammy to sign the email as her former male self but she had little choice right now. There was another email from John Hibbert, dated that morning.

Tammy,
 
just to let you know the main topic of conversation at dinner was still Mr Small, it seems he'd been threatening some of the boys in the lower years, but they were afraid to tell the prefects or the other masters. They're scared he'll be back, but I get the feeling he won't be.
 
I saw you and Tim arrive together yesterday afternoon, how is he? Since the Smalls don't live in the school I rarely see him outside classes.
 
I hope you'll be able to come to the end of year party in the common room, it's on the 17th, we all head home the following morning. It would be a good time for the rest of the sixth form to meet you.
 
See you next week,
 
John
(ps got a date with Tanya this morning!)

Tammy smiled, those two were meant for each other, but she hadn't intended to be a matchmaker. Tammy shifted on the bed to put the laptop out of the way and instantly regretted the movement. Fortunately it wasn't quite as bad as before, perhaps the pills were working.

There was a knock on the door and breakfast arrived, she was expecting bacon and eggs but found grapefruit, cereal, OJ, tea and toast. She decided quickly that the grapefruit would be heading back to the kitchen untouched.

Tammy had just finished when there was another knock on the door. She shouted for them to wait a minute as she shuffled into the bathroom. A few minutes later she walked back into the bedroom to find a reception committee.

"I thought I asked you to wait," looking at her father and the two others, "and who are you?"

She'd met Dr Hoskins before but the question was targeted at a tall man in a dark suit.

"I'm sorry Miss Smart, my name is Dr Hughes, I'm the Caithness Police Medical Examiner. We've had a complaint of Actual Bodily Harm and I need to check the injury." He put a case on the floor and took out a camera.

Tammy looked unsure but Dr Hoskins nodded, he obviously knew the man. Tammy was asked to climb on the bed and lay on her front; she was obviously in pain as she climbed on the bed. Her father gently adjusted the duvet to protect her modesty but then lifted her nightie to reveal the bruise.

The Police doctor photographed the bruise then felt around it as Tammy winced. Satisfied, he wrote up a description in his notebook and left the room. Dr Hoskins then had a feel.

"Tammy, you can roll over now. I can't feel if there's any damage beyond the obvious heavy bruising, but I want you to take it easy for a few days. I don't believe you need an xray or a scan unless it gets worse. I'll leave you a dozen painkillers, take one every six hours, I want to see you in three days if you're still in pain, sooner if you have any other problems."

"Doctor, Tammy and myself will be in London for a few days from tonight, back on Wednesday late afternoon."

"I can't say I'm happy, how are you travelling?"

"We're flying from Wick."

"At least you're not on a coach or going by rail. When are you leaving?"

"At two."

"Right, Tammy is to take one of these now and another at twelve, then every six hours. If she can walk to the car then she's cleared to fly. I believe there's a swimming pool here?"

"Yes."

"It would be helpful if she can spend half an hour in the water."

"Right, thank you doctor." Dr Hoskins left the room as Tammy looked at her father.

"Dad, can you phone Angela, Elsie will have the number, and ask her to get here by eleven?"

"I take it this has something to do with the swimming pool?"

"Perhaps?" Richard left the room to make the call.

Tammy dozed until gone ten when she needed to go to the bathroom again. This time, however, she felt uncomfortable but not in pain. Instead of going back to bed she wrapped a gown around herself and headed down the stairs.

Tammy found Elsie and her father in the sitting room reading newspapers, as well as a fresh coffee pot so poured a cup, sitting carefully on the couch.

"Feeling better?"

"Yes. Dad, did the police say anything?"

"They phoned after the doctor got back to them, he confirmed it's sufficient for a charge of actual bodily harm. John spent the night in the cells and was due to be bailed this morning but ABH might change that. I have a feeling they'll put him in front of a magistrate tomorrow and hang onto him until then."

"Does that mean I'll have to go to the magistrates court?"

"No, in any case Dr Hoskins has already signed you off, if necessary he'll re-issue the certificate to include your injury."

"Good, I just don't feel I could face that toad right now. Sorry Elsie."

"That's alright Tammy, I sometimes forget that he's my son, I won't tolerate that behaviour from any of my family and I've already told him that. You don't need to be the object of his problems and he'll not be a part of this family until he sorts himself out. You are, however, now my youngest surrogate daughter, and I'll do anything to protect you."

"Thank you, you're too kind."

"Not at all. You've brought joy and excitement into this stuffy house. You know, for the past few years there's only been Michael and myself here daily, and often I didn't even see him for days at a time. Cathy and John would turn up for Sunday dinner then go their own way, although Cathy would sometimes stay to talk for an hour. Then I would be on my own again."

"I hadn't realised."

"That doesn't matter Tammy, I'm just so pleased you are here. I meant it when I said you brought joy, even the staff have said so. They all care for you, I passed on that mention by Dr Hoskins about swimming and it sent them down there to clean the pool and refill it. Normally it's done Monday morning but they decided to do it this morning for you."

"I don't deserve this attention, Elsie. I'd rather not have staff at all but I take it I don't have a choice?"

"Tammy, I can't run a house this size without them. In fact I've just taken on someone else."

"In that case I'd like to do something for them."

"Such as?" Richard was wondering.

"I'll think of something."

The doorbell sounded and a minute later Joan Small and Angela, dressed as Tim, arrived. Tammy stood up to greet them but her discomfort was apparent to Joan who went straight to her.

"Is this a result of what he did to you?"

"Unfortunately, but he'll pay for it."

"So is the trip off?"

"No, but I have some therapy planned. Angela, did you bring a swimsuit?"

"No Tammy, anyway, why? As far as I'm aware the town's pool is closed on a Sunday."

"There's a pool downstairs silly, come with me and we'll find something to wear."

Joan looked at Richard who just shrugged and suggested Joan sat down. Richard guessed he should talk a few subjects over with her.

Tammy pulled Tim up to her room and told him to sit on the bed. like John the week before, he was amazed by the room and stared at the furnishings. Tammy threw open the doors of the walk in wardrobe and started looking through a drawer. She pulled a couple of things out and threw a set at Angela.

She pulled at the straps, wondering what she was holding.

"Don't stand there playing with it, get in the bathroom and put it on!"

"Tammy, is this what I think it is?"

"If you mean is it a bikini, yes."

"I can't wear this, they'll laugh at me."

"Who?"

"Them."

"I challenge you to actually name anyone who'll laugh." She dug into a drawer and pulled out her old enhancers, "you'll also need these."

Angela looked at the jelly in her hands, still wondering if this is what she'd imagined. Tammy pushed her into the bathroom then quickly changed, putting on a towelling robe.

After a few minutes Tammy gave up waiting and pushed the door of the bathroom open. Angela spun round and was about to say something to Tammy but decided against it.

Angela was wearing the briefs but had the top in her hand, the enhancers were on the vanity by the sink.

Angela was sobbing quietly, "Tammy, I don't know if this is right."

"Angela, are you a girl inside?"

"Yes, at least I think so."

"Then be a girl outside as well, If you don't try it you'll never know."

"It's easy for you, you've worn one of these before," she shook the top."

"No I haven't, this is the first time. I wore a one piece last time, they're very different."

"You're kidding me."

"No."

"OK then, when did you grow those?" She pointed at Tammy's breasts.

"These are falsies until I get some of my own." Tammy pulled her bikini to one side to show Angela. "See?"

"But I'll still look strange."

"I don't think so, although I think it'll look odd with just the briefs." Tammy took the top from her and placed it on the reluctant Angela, then inserted the forms. "After all, who else will see you?"

Under a minute later the two girls walked down the stairs. Angela was by now also wearing a towelling robe tightly around her waist. She was petrified by the time they were half-way down, Tammy almost had to drag her. Fortunately Angela didn't shout or scream; that would have earned attention which would definitely not be welcome.

Somehow Tammy got her to the staircase that led down to the pool and games room, the lights were on and the water was glistening on the tiling. As they reached the open doorway, Angela momentarily forgot her problems and just stared, Tammy closed the door behind them.

Suddenly one of the staff came out of a utility room as Angela stood there, Tammy was already taking off her robe and hanging it up. Angela looked up to see the woman coming towards her.

"Good morning Miss Smart, Miss Small, I hope you will enjoy your swim."

"Please call me Tammy, I don't like to be formal; especially when I'm barely dressed! I'm also certain that Miss Small would prefer Angela, wouldn't you?"

"Hmmmm." Angela was cowering in a corner trying, badly, to make herself small.

"If you prefer, Miss Tammy, but I would prefer not when Mrs McPherson is nearby, that is her rule."

"Thank you, anyway I don't think I've seen you before, what's your name?" Asked Tammy.

"Leanne, Miss. I'm new here, I started last week."

"Well, Leanne, thank you very much, we will enjoy this, won't we Angela?"

Angela nodded but was too frightened to say anything. Leanne left the pool and headed up the stairs, Tammy then went to deal with Angela. She'd forgotten her injury for now.

"Now, did Leanne accept you?"

"Hmmmm, yes, I think so." Angela was almost gibbering.

"So, what's the problem? Get that gown off and get in the water."

"I can't!"

"Yes you can," Angela's towelling belt had already come undone so Tammy simply pulled the gown off her. Before Angela could argue, she was pushed into the water. Tammy jumped in a moment later.

"You!" Angela reached for her expletive vocabulary.

"Now, is that any way to say thank you?" Tammy splashed Angela then reached for a small beach-ball that was floating beside her, carefully throwing it at Angela.

This play went on just over half an hour, during which time Angela became less aware of the bikini. Suddenly a phone started ringing, Tammy climbed out and walked towards the door, where the phone was fixed on the wall.

"Hello?"

"Tammy, it's half past eleven, I suggest you two get yourselves dressed. I know how long it will take you, I was young once."

"Yes Elsie!"

Tammy headed towards the showers, telling Angela to do the same. She picked up the shampoo that was sat there and started to wash her hair, after taking off her top and realistic breastforms. Angela just stared.

"Get in here, now! Remember, my body is the same as your's and this is no different than when we've been in the shower after rugby or cricket in an earlier life!" Tammy turned away then eased her way out of her briefs to finish washing before picking up a fluffy towel.

"Hurry up young lady, or you'll miss lunch."

Angela reluctantly got under the shower and washed, five minutes later the two were walking up the stairs, having left their swimming costumes behind. Strangely Angela felt more secure with nothing under her robe than when she'd been wearing the bikini, something she couldn't work understand. She had however slipped the breast enhancers into the gown pocket, unsure of their movement against her. They reached Tammy's room and Angela went looking for Tim's clothes, which had gone.

"Where's my stuff, what am I going to do?"

"Calm down, one of the staff will have taken them to be laundered."

"But what am I going to wear?"

Tammy pointed at the clothes in the corner, mostly now hung on a temporary rail.

"But they're girls' clothes."

"Yes, you got it in one."

"They're the clothes you bought yesterday!"

"Stop stating the obvious, will you. Go and choose something."

"Why can't I get some clothes from my case?"

"Did you bring a case this morning?"

"My mum said she'd sort that out." Angela put her head down in shame, she still relied on her mother for things like that.

"I wouldn't be so sure, especially after my father spoke to her yesterday. I think the idea is that you spend the next few days as a girl so you can confirm to yourself that you want this. I know it'll be scary, but if you can get over three days full-time as a female then you'll survive just about anything, plus no-one will know you."

"I think I should be angry with you for doing this, but then I'd also have to be angry with my mum." She say down and started to cry, Tammy sat next to her and put her arm around Angela. Angela was even more confused and tried to pull away but Tammy wouldn't budge.

"Tammy, this is wrong, I mean we're both still male."

"You're wrong, we're girls and you need to learn that girls are not afraid to show emotion or to comfort each other. Right now you're unsure of yourself and need help. Right now you have two choices, walk downstairs and ask your mum to take you home or explore yourself by coming with my father and I."

"Can I think about this?"

"Sure, I'll get dressed while you're thinking." Angela probably expected Tammy to go into the bathroom with her clothes but instead she pulled a bra and knickers set out of her drawers, turned around, dropped the robe then started putting them on.

"What are you doing?" Angela asked as Tammy was fastening her bra and dropping her breast-forms into the cups.

"I think I'm getting dressed, or did I miss something?"

"No, I mean, but?"

"You're not making much sense. Now, will you let me continue dressing?" Angela nodded as Tammy picked up a new pair of tights and sat to put them on. Angela just stared for a minute then picked up a clean pair of knickers, that were sat on her new case, and stepped into them.

Tammy knew she'd won the first round but ignored Angela while she quickly put the rest of her clothes on. She had chosen a long skirt that matched one of Angela's and added a jumper. Tammy knew she needed to be comfortable for the two flights.

Angela meanwhile was holding a bra that matched her knickers and was wondering how to put it on. She was now realising part of her long-held wishes, but she was as much scared as she was elated, and it showed. Tammy walked over and gently took the bra from Angela's hands and put it on her, teaching would come tomorrow. She picked up the enhancers and dropped them in, Angela jumped slightly. "Don't worry, they'll warm up."

Tammy walked across to the corner and picked up some opaque tights, passing them across.

"Can't I wear socks?"

"No, you need to shave or wax your legs and we don't have the time. Do you think you can put these on yourself?"

"No, I don't think so."

Tammy got down onto her knees and helped Angela, once again there was little time for demonstration; they'd already taken twenty minutes to get Angela into the lingerie.

Tammy handed Angela the skirt, Angela just stared at her.

"But it's a skirt."

"Look, I told you there are no prizes for statements like that. Anyway I don't have any trousers that will fit you so you'll wear that or nothing.

"They'll see it doesn't belong on me."

"No, don't be silly. Hey, we'll even match! What do you think anyone will see, if they look? Two girls in matching skirts. What will they think? They'll think we're sisters! There's a nice jumper there, It's a different colour than mine but it's the same style, just pull it on, you can manage that on your own, can't you?"

Tammy giggled and had Angela step into the long skirt. Angela then put the jumper on, noting how it was shaped around her artificially filled bra.

"Good,now get those boots on and come over to the dressing table."

Two minutes later Angela had discovered that it's easier if you pull the boots' zips all the way down first. Tammy had picked up Angela's make-up and now laid it out, ready for use.

"Again, I don't have time for any lessons so hold still, at least you had a close shave this morning. I'll start with your eyes, try not to blink!" Angela again knew she was both elated and defeated.

Ten minutes later Tammy was able to put her own make-up on, she went for a simple minimalist style. Finally they were both almost ready, Tammy brushed Angela's hair out, noting that it really was too short to do anything useful. Her eyebrows also needed fixing, but not today.

Tammy made a quick call to let Elsie know they were on their way, she then grabbed Angela's hand and marched out of the bedroom and onto the stairway. Angela was as scared now as she had ever been, especially when she looked down the stairs and saw her mother waiting. She lost her footing as she fainted

Tammy held her in a firm grip, grabbing the bannister, as Angela fell onto the stairs, Joan immediately rushed up to them to help Angela back to her feet, Angela was in a daze as Joan and Tammy walked, almost carried, her down the stairs and into the sitting room. Tammy cursed herself, although the boots only had a one inch heel, Angela obviously had little or no experience in heels or boots, and clearly not ever at the same time.

Angela slowly came around, she became aware of where she was but was unsure how she'd ended up in the sitting room, but thankfully felt secure in the chair. Then she realised what she was wearing and started to cry.

"Angela, dear, you'll ruin your make-up," said Joan as she walked over to comfort her daughter.

"Mum I'm sorry, I've been so silly."

"No you haven't, you need to explore yourself, I know you want to do this and I also know you're very scared. Tammy is there to help you, not to push you into something you don't want to do. If you aren't ready then say so now."

Across the other side of the room Richard was nodding, he'd had exactly this conversation with Joan an hour earlier. Joan had initially resisted, this was outside her own experiences but Richard had explained how he'd faced similar issues only a few weeks earlier. Of course, Tammy had lied to Angela; her mother had indeed remembered Tim's luggage but Tammy felt she would never have got Angela into a skirt willingly if she knew there was a set of male clothing available.

Tammy sat down and felt a shock from her back, she cried in agony as the strain from the incident on the stairs had pulled on her bruise. "Dad, tablet."

Richard rushed up the stairs to her room to pick up the tablets, Leanne was there packing Angela's case.

"Excuse me Mr Smart."

"No, please carry on, I'm looking for Tammy's tablets."

"They're in her handbag, on the table."

"Thanks."

"Could you ask Miss Smart to inform me what to pack for her?"

"I'll let her know."

Richard retrieved on tablet and walked back to Tammy, passing on the message. She started to get up but was waved back down by her father.

"No way! We'll sort it out for you."

Elsie stood up, "Tammy what do you need?"

Tammy gave her a list, Elsie then proceeded to walk out of the room and up the stairs.

"You need that much?"

"Yes Dad, I do."

Angela again forgot her own predicament She was shaken back into awareness however when her mother gently made a suggestion.

"Angela, dear, your skirt is bunched up. Stand up and smooth it out. Watch me."

Joan stood and demonstrated, Angela copied but put her head in her hands.

"Stop that young lady."

"But Mum?"

"But nothing."

Angela had little time to argue as lunch was called. Elsie had returned to the sitting room and asked Joan and her daughter to follow her, they obviously weren't familiar with the house. Angela reluctantly stood and held her mother's extended hand. Tammy was helped up by her father and awkwardly made her way to the dining room. Michael had just walked in when he saw Tammy, he rushed over to her.

"My brother did this to you?"

Richard replied on Tammy's behalf, "yes, unfortunately."

Elsie intervened, "Michael, don't get any ideas."

"Mum, would I?"

"Perhaps?"

"Mum, we've never really got on but I wouldn't. I don't agree what he's done but he remains my brother and I can't change that."

Any conversation died that that point. The six of them sat in an awkward silence as lunch was served, then the only noise was that of cutlery on china plates. Michael was almost sat opposite Angela, realising that he'd never met the feminised boy with the ruined make-up. He decided to ask any questions later, if at all, and kept his eyes diverted for the meal.

While they waited for the dessert, Richard asked Tammy if she was capable of travelling.

"Yes Dad, it is getting easier, honest, I'll be better by tonight." Tammy knew she was putting a gloss on her situation, something Richard was well aware of, however he didn't query her answer.

"Tammy?" Elsie left the rest of the question hanging.

"Elsie, I'm sure."

"Tammy, You can twist your father round your little finger, but not me. I know you're still in pain so I want an honest answer."

"Elsie, I can do this, for my own sake, and Angela's."

"Don't divert the issue, young lady." Elsie was quite serious.

Angela stood and walked from the table, but only reached the hallway, uncertain where to go in the unfamiliar house. Joan went to get up to follow but Elsie quietly told her to sit still. Michael had his first sight of her skirt. He quickly rationalised the situation, at least tried to.

Thomas walked in with the custard pot, followed by Leanne carrying the first of the warm plum puddings. The five sat there, spoons remaining on the table.

"Angela, if you don't come back here we'll waste our puddings."

Elsie's voice was partly one of command and partly one of leverage. The distraught Angela walked back to the table, having succumbed to Elsie's instruction. All those years at the school had helped to break her will under similar circumstances.

Finally the custard pot was passed around as the meal continued, as if nothing had happened; a very surreal situation. As the last dish was cleared, Thomas returned to the dining room.

"Coffee is served in the sitting room."

They started to walk out but Elsie took Angela's hand and pulled her to the stairs. Tammy looked at Elsie but understood what was happening and nodded in agreement. Elsie took Angela to Tammy's room and into the en-suite bathroom, using wipes to clean her face. She remained silent as Elsie picked up the mascara.

Tammy had forgotten to buy a make-up bag for Angela but Elsie had lent her one of her own and put Angela's limited make-up in it. The new luggage was now sat at the bottom of the stairs, Elsie sent Angela into the sitting room and placed the make-up bag in the flight case. She walked back to the sitting room, fortunately finding Michael there. Elsie walked over and quietly spoke to him, he nodded in agreement.

As they finished their coffees Richard stood, glancing at Tammy who did likewise. Joan understood what was happening.

"Angela dear, it looks like it's time to go, I'm sure you'll enjoy your time in London." She gave her daughter a kiss, remembering that several hours ago she had left their house with a son.

Tammy took Angela's hand and walked her out to the Freelander; Richard climbed into the driver's seat with Michael beside him. Tammy put Angela in the back then walked round to the other side so she could also get in. As they pulled away Angela's mother was stood in the doorway trying not to cry.

Elsie put her arm around Joan and took her back to the sitting room where the coffee pot had been refilled.

"Joan, I know this is new to you, I also know that your daughter is very scared. You need to let her discover herself, if this is what she wants then she will have to experience life as a girl. I suspect that your main worry is that only Wednesday morning, four days ago, you had a son and now you have a daughter."

"Yes, I'm scared for her, especially after what happened yesterday."

"Yesterday you met my eldest son who, right now, is on the point of being disinherited. As far as I know, apart from your husband, he is the only person who has given Tammy any real trouble. So long as Angela is with Tammy and Richard I promise she'll be safe, I've also made certain that she has one set of male clothes hidden in her bag in case she changes her mind. She won't be forced into anything, but she needs support and maybe a little persuasion."

Joan was still a little unsure, Elsie did her best to reassure her.

"Joan, I know Richard will ensure nothing happens. To you, Angela still looks very much like your son, but to anyone else she looks like a girl with a short haircut. Tammy will sort that out I'm certain, she just hasn't had a chance yet, she's a very bright girl. Your daughter will also gain confidence over the next few days. Also, if she really has second thoughts before the flight, Michael will bring her back."

Meanwhile, Angela had fully accepted her fate. She'd never flown before so this would be a new experience, added to the other new experiences so far today.

Tamara's Début   Part Eighteen   by Shiraz

 
 
Sunday 7th December continued
 

The drive to Wick airport was uneventful to the point of being boring. Michael pulled up in the short stay car park by the small terminal building then went to find a trolley for the luggage. Angela, however, began to have an attack of nerves and firmly refused to open the car door.

“Angela, it’ll be fine, I promise you.”

Tammy walked round the car and swung the door open, holding out her hand.

“I’m not going and I’m definitely not holding your hand!”

“We’ll tell Michael to take you back, if that’s what you want.”

“Fine.”

Tammy closed the door and went to speak to her father who had the tickets plus their passports. Then she began to worry: her passport still said ‘Thomas Edward Smart’ — her former legal name.

“Dad, do you think we can use my driving licence instead?”

“I’ll speak to them, put your passport away.”

Angela was getting confused, “What’s wrong?” She wound the window down after looking around to make sure no-one was nearby.

“My passport has my old name in it, I forgot to change it. I also look nothing like the photo, it was taken four years ago. I might not be able to fly if they insist on it.”

“Why do we need it anyway, it’s not as if we’re going to France or some other country?”

“It’s the new security rules, they have to know exactly who’s on the ’plane. The UK doesn't issue ID cards like other European countries so they say you have to have a passport.”

They waited a few minutes before they saw Richard returning, Angela was becoming less tense although she initially wanted to wind the window back up when a young couple passed him, pushing a small child in a buggy.

“Right, I told the airline you didn’t have a passport so they’ll accept the driving licence photocard. Angela, I had a little chat with them about you, they don’t think it will be a problem. I said you’d be getting your passport changed as soon as you’d had your surgery.”

“You didn’t!”

“No, but your face was priceless.”

She stared at Richard.

“Angela, they really said it was okay provided you still looked like your photo. Don’t worry, once we’ve passed the check-in you can forget about it.”

Somewhat re-assured, Angela began to get out of the car, but stopped again. She now had two contrary problems.

“Tammy, I need a wee.”

“Then come with me,” Tammy held out her hand, “I know where the loos are, I’ve flown from here before.”

“But I’m not holding your hand.”

“Fine, but if you don’t come with me you’ll wet yourself.”

Reluctantly Angela started to get out of the car, after checking again that there wasn’t anyone nearby. She had a fright when a small child ran into the car-park towards her, a parent in hot pursuit. Without a thought for herself she rushed out of the car to intercept the child, scooping her up.

“Oh, thank you, thank you. She’s a little scared and ran from the terminal when I took her out of her buggy.”

“That’s okay, I’m a bit scared myself.”

“Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.” The mother smiled at Angela, who blushed brightly. “You’ll do fine, I love the skirt by the way.”

Tammy walked over and the woman noted her skirt. “Matching, that’s lovely. Are you sisters?”

“No, but I thought it would be good for Angela and I to wear matching clothes today.”

“That’s a lovely name, oh here comes my husband.”

The husband looked at Angela, his eyes showing that he was confused.

“Dear, this is Angela, and,—”

“Tammy.”

“Tammy. Angela just saved our daughter from an accident. You’re grateful, aren’t you?”

“Yes, of course. Come on, we’ll miss our flight.”

Richard, who’d stood the other side of the car after loading the cases on the trolley, now approached.

“Are you on the Edinburgh flight? I’m Tammy’s father by the way.”

The husband was given a jab in the side and held out his hand to shake Richard’s. “Yes we are, I think we need to get checked-in soon.”

They approached the terminal, Richard and the husband in the lead, Michael was pushing the trolley. The girls walked with the mother and daughter, Angela, realised that a tantrum now would be counter-productive, especially as her bladder was complaining bitterly in the cold air; she was far from comfortable.

“Tammy?” She hissed.

“I know, we’ll get right there.” She turned to the mother and said they need to get there quickly.

“I’m heading there myself, I think the little one needs changing. I’m Sally Yates, by the way, my husband is James. The urchin is Becky, she’s two years old.”

“My father is Richard and that’s Michael who’s a friend of the family and our driver today.”

They entered the warm terminal and the three walked to the ladies loo. Angela abruptly stopping outside, shaking her head.

Tammy tried to pull her. “Don’t make a scene!”

Sally quickly realised what was happening. “Come on dear, I guess this is new to you but you’re only going to bring attention to yourself out here. Going into the gents is not an option right now.”

Angela began to cry but accepted Tammy’s hand as they went through the door. Tammy directed her to an empty cubicle then went into one for herself while Sally went to the fold-down changing station. Tammy was out swiftly and went to wash her hands, Sally however was having trouble with her daughter who was threatening to wriggle off the mat and on to the floor.

“Could you help me, dear?”

Tammy dried her hands then went to assist. They’d just finished when Tammy could hear sobbing from a cubicle. She went across to the door.

“Angela, Michael is still out there if you want to go back. Otherwise don’t ruin your make-up, we won’t have time to fix it until we’ve gone through security.”

The sobbing stopped but the door remained closed. Sally decided to intervene.

“Angela, you might have saved my daughter from serious injury, or worse, for that I can’t thank you enough. I also think you are very brave but you need to start believing in yourself, I can’t see much of a boy in you right now, you might not be very girly either but no-one will challenge you in case they get it wrong.”

“I’m not sure.”

“Like I said, when you believe in yourself you’ll find this easier. Would it help if I said that my own brother was like you?”

“Was he?”

“Yes, and had the same problems when he was out and about as a girl. Now, we’re going to miss the flight and I bet the men are starting to wonder what on earth we’re doing.”

Angela slowly opened the door and peeked outside. “Don’t forget to wash!”

She’d been so much in a hurry when she’d entered the loo that she hadn’t looked around. She saw how clean it was, very unlike any male facilities she’d previously used. As she used the dryer a couple more ladies entered. Angela had her back to them but nonetheless felt vulnerable.

“Angela, I’m sure they’re dry by now, come on.” Sally took Angela’s hand and they walked back onto the concourse. As expected the men were stood waiting, not pleased with the delay.

The speaker system announced their flight and Angela was pulled across to the desk. The woman there did a double take when she opened Angela’s passport and found Tim within. She shook her head but processed the tickets regardless. No doubt she’d have a laugh later but her recent training session on equality meant that she knew better than to say anything to the passenger in front of her.

They walked to security and placed their hand baggage on the conveyor before walking through the arch. Angela set off the alarm and froze, a security officer beckoned her forward and used a wand to isolate the problem to the zips on her boots. Satisfied he allowed them to proceed. Richard and James had needed to empty their pockets so had to stand there picking everything up from the trays while Tammy and Angela folded their arms—this was payback for earlier.

As they entered the departure lounge Tammy started to drag Angela towards the ladies room.

“I don’t need to go again.”

“You need to fix your face and we can’t easily sort it out on the ’plane.” Sally nodded in agreement, handed her daughter to James, and the three marched into the loos.

It was apparent to several women who were in there that Angela was not applying her own make-up, a few tried to make comments but Tammy and Sally kept up a near constant conversation.

“Stand still, Angela.”

“How does this colour look?”

“You really should do this yourself.”

“Try this look, here I’ll help you.”

"Come on, keep your head still. I still don't see why that school wouldn't let you wear makeup so you could practice."

Ten minutes later they were finished, having fixed their own faces as well. The two men were sat together with five coffees on the table, the look on their faces showed that they hadn’t seen exactly where the girls had gone, but they didn’t risk asking questions. It also looked like Becky was still restless.

The coffee was still warm and a welcome calming distraction for Angela, indeed she now started to forget what she was wearing and became apprehensive about the flight instead. Richard had spoken to James whilst the girls were absent, James now seemed to have less of an issue with Angela as he spoke.

“Angela, have you flown before?”

“No, never, I’m not sure about this.” Angela was referring to the flight but the statement had another meaning which the group picked up.

“Don’t worry, it’ll be fine. It’s a very safe way to travel, where are you travelling to?”

“London, but I don’t know any more than that.”

Tammy answered, “Edgware, but we’re flying into Stansted as they haven’t built London Edgware Airport yet.”

They all laughed at the joke. Becky started to cry so Sally took hold of her after finding a feeder cup. She had some warm milk in a thermos flask, the security check had missed it somehow.

“That’s a good idea,” offered Tammy.

“It saves asking people to warm it for me especially as most places refuse these days on health and safety grounds. All very stupid.” She handed the cup to Becky who grabbed it firmly. You’ll get used to the rules that don’t make sense if you have your own children.”

Tammy giggled at that, but felt it best if nothing was said, Sally hadn’t identified Tammy yet.

A few minutes later the flight was called. They picked up everything and started towards the door that led to the tarmac. A steward beckoned the twenty or so passengers booked onto the small aircraft, although Angela shook her head. Sally handed Becky—who was still drinking—to Tammy and took Angela’s hand, whispering reassuring words into her ear. Angela nodded and kept walking.

Tammy went to hand Becky back to Sally but Sally shook her head.

The five adults plus child headed up the steps into the cabin. Becky chose that moment to throw her empty cup across the cabin towards the steward.

“Angela, can you get it for me?” Tammy was now able to hand back the wriggling child.

Angela walked over to the steward who was holding the cup. “There you go, Miss.” She blushed and rushed back to the others who were now seated. She ended up behind the others, who were paired. Tammy realised that Angela needed support so switched seats, abandoning her father. It also prevented a stranger from sitting beside Angela.

Angela listened to the pre-flight announcements intently but Tammy and Richard, being seasoned fliers, got comfortable and ignored the information.

Angela actually missed the take-off and when she looked out of the small window saw Wick already disappearing rapidly beneath a blanket of cloud. The rest of the flight proceeded quietly, Angela and Tammy discussing school and Thurso’s characters. Tammy mentioned Joanne and her experiences with the torturess.

“You let her do that?”

“It didn’t look like I had a choice, plus I did it for Cathy, Elsie's daughter.”

“Not for yourself?”

“Well, it’s looks better when you wear a bikini.”

“Why?” Angela obviously had limited experiences. Tammy reached over and whispered in her ear.

“Oh. Did it hurt?”

“I’d be lying if I said no. It was much easier for my legs, you’ll eventually find that out for yourself.”

“Why?”

“Do you want to wear those thick tights every day, even when it's warm?”

“No.”

They continued to chat, barely registering the approach to Edinburgh until the captain made an announcement. Angela tensed up again as the ’plane descended, her knuckles white as she gripped the seat armrest.

They touched down a few minutes early, Angela was pleased to get off the aircraft, temporarily forgetting her fear of being identified as a boy dressed as a girl. Of course, most people were too interested in their luggage to look at the other passengers. Richard held combined tickets for both legs of the journey so didn’t need to retrieve their bags before they headed towards the transfer area. Sally and James had a different onward flight but walked with Richard and the girls.

“Tammy, I hope you don’t mind but something’s been bugging me since I met you. I heard you and Angela talking on the flight and I’m pretty sure you were male once. Please don’t answer that if you don’t want to.”

“Sally, I was male until a few weeks ago andlegally I still am, for now at least. I’m hoping my appointment at the Glasgow Royal Infirmary on Wednesday will solve that administrative issue. By the way, my name is now officially Tamara.”

“Thank you for being honest with me, I should explain I’m a nurse working with transgendered patients at the London. I opted for that because of my brother’s issues, unfortunately he died before he completed his journey into womanhood.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, I’m just angry with myself that I didn’t support him more. He couldn’t take the pressure and threw out all his female clothes, refusing to acknowledge that side of him. He also told me to never refer to him as a girl. It was my regret that made me look for a role in that field, I was already a psychiatric nurse at the Royal Marsden.”

“I’m wondering if you’ve come across Alison and Andrea McPherson?”

“That pair! How do you know them?”

“I’m staying with their aunt in Thurso. I’m hoping to meet up with them while we’re in London.”

“You’ll have fun, I know you will. By the way, who are you seeing in Glasgow?”

“Professor Roberts.”

“I’ve heard of him, but apparently he’s very difficult to see as he only does a couple of days a week with NHS patients.”

“I’m seeing him privately.”

“Oh, I don’t always agree with seeing a consultant privately but unfortunately I do hear of TG patients who have waited a year or more for their initial referral on the NHS.”

“I was referred by an NHS psychologist who said he was the best available, I wouldn’t have gone privately otherwise.”

“If you need to discuss any issues while you’re in London then come along to the London, here’s my number.” Sally handed her card over.

“Thanks.”

Tammy, Angela and Richard were called to the gate for EZY238—their flight to Stansted. Most of them gave a goodbye kiss, Sally’s husband being the exception. The group then separated and the business of flying took precedence.

Once seated aboard the Airbus Tammy spoke again to Angela, whom she’d barely known as Tim.

“Where did you live before Thurso?”

“In Bletchley, Buckinghamshire, not far from Milton Keynes. I almost didn’t go to Thurso, I was offered a place in a private school there after taking some tests. They never told me much about the school but Dad wouldn’t allow it, he said that if he was going to Scotland then I was as well.”

Before long the questions stopped and the two girls fell asleep. With the help of a tail wind the ’plane landed at 1925, ten minutes early. The touchdown woke the girls with a start, Angela forgetting where she was for a moment.

Tammy felt a pain in her back and quickly reached for the pills in her bag. She had no water so had to swallow one dry, something she’d never liked doing.

Baggage retrieval was the usual confusion, with several domestic flights arriving minutes apart. Once they had everything they headed down to the station, underneath the terminal. From there it was a train ride to Liverpool Street station and an underground journey to Edgware Road. Finally Richard took a cab from outside the tube station for the final mile of their travels. It was, however, nine in the evening when they finally arrived. Richard's car was sat in the driveway, where he'd left it a month earlier.

Richard's personal assistant, Tanya, was waiting for them. They could smell a chilli in the kitchen but first had to take their bags upstairs, Tammy showed Angela the guest room and suggested she hang her clothes up. Tanya had made sure the bedrooms were prepared and the fridge had been stocked with essentials for the next few days. Richard knew this was well outside her contract but he would compensate her for the extra effort.

After eating they stayed to have a hot chocolate before heading for bed. Angela had found a nightie in her case so wore it, given no alternative choice. She was asleep within a minute.
 
 
Monday 8th December
 
Richard was the first awake in the morning and called for the girls to get up, with a promise of a hot cup of tea. Downstairs, he sorted out his own breakfast whilst waiting for the two sleepy-heads. A suggestion of a cooked breakfast was quickly dismissed by Richard.

“We have a lunchtime meeting with the solicitor. You won’t want to spoil your appetites.”

After their cereal and toast, Tammy took Angela back upstairs to shower. Tammy seldom needed to shave, and not at all during the past month, however Angela had some light coloured stubble that had to be removed. This was followed by a moisturiser, something Tammy told her, that she’d have to do daily from now. A short make-up lesson followed, concentrating on her eyes and lips. Tammy put a light coating of foundation on her face, Angela could practice that another time.

They then to select that day’s clothes, again Tammy did her best to choose clothes for Angela that she could match from her own limited wardrobe. Given the time constraints Tammy again insisted that Angela wore opaque tights under her long skirt, they would deal with that issue later.

It had taken over an hour for them to return downstairs, by now needing a coffee. Richard was getting impatient; he was not used to this delay.

"Whilst you've been up there I've had a call from Elsie. Angela, apparently your dad was a union representative at the school and the union is claiming your dad was bullied."

"You're joking!"

"No, it's true, apparently this kind of thing does happen, don't worry about it."

Finally the three of them piled into the car and headed across North London towards Brent Cross Shopping Centre. As ever the London traffic caused problems, but today was worse than normal. Richard pulled on to the A5 and immediately was stuck behind a bus trying to pull into the outside lane, past a 40 ton lorry stopped there, behind a police car with lights flashing.

"I bet that lorry was stopped for no good reason, especially on a 'Red Route'!" Richard was never happy with the Don’t Even Consider Stopping Law on that road, which seemed to create more problems than it solved. They made good progress until they were just short of the A406 North Circular Road, the road that only just fails to be the longest car-park in the UK — after the M25.

“What’s going on here?”

Ahead they could see more blue lights, right now nothing was moving. To his left the bottom of the M1 was also stationary, he could have used the Sat Nav travel advice but that would only have told him what he could already see.

“Dad, how long are we going to be here?”

“I haven’t a clue.”

He switched on the radio and tuned it to BBC Radio 5 Live where, every half an hour they were given an update on their own traffic jam. By midday they had crawled as far as the roundabout but the police sent them back down the A5. Tammy called their solicitor as Richard went back the way they’d come.

“We've just escaped from a traffic jam and have turned back for the house, Dad asks if you can meet us there?”

“I’ve just left a meeting in Watford, I’ll be with you at one. I hope the coffee is good?”

“I tried some this morning, and survived.”

“In that case it can’t be too bad. ’Bye.”

It took only twenty minutes to retrace the two and a half hour journey of the morning. The radio was now saying that an Italian registered Ferrari had been involved in a collision with a black cab. The taxi had survived better than the Ferrari.

Back indoors they took stock of the fact nothing had been achieved so far. Tammy went to the fridge and found enough ingredients for a Bolognese sauce, the dried spaghetti was in a cupboard. Angela went for a walk around the town-house, mostly to pass the time. It was too cold to venture into the garden.

Richard found the mail that hadn’t already been dealt with, then checked the fax in his office. An invoice from the hotel in Lausanne said that his wife Tara had checked out and the account closed. He actually had little to deal with, Tanya had handled everything on his behalf. He wondered if he could tempt her to work for him full time.

Gerald arrived just after one and was met by Richard, who introduced his daughter.

“I’m very pleased to meet you, finally. I’ve heard so much!”

Tammy blushed. Her father took over.

“This is Angela, a school friend of Tammy.”

“Please to meet you,” he held out his hand to shake hers.

The introductions over, Richard showed him into the dining room while Tammy and Angela handled the food. A few minutes later they were eating. A suggestion of wine had been turned down on the grounds of driving, the coffee however was strong and black.

Tammy and Angela cleared the remains away, loading the dishwasher before returning to the dining room. The two men now had financial paperwork spread over the table and were going through a bundle of official documents. Very soon both had also found space for their laptops on the table, Tammy suggested to Angela they weren’t needed.

Gerald looked up, “Tammy, this affects you. Can you hang on for a minute?”

“Right, but I’m getting a bit bored.”

The solicitor shifted some papers out of the way and brought a new file to the table.

“This contains the transfer of part of your father’s portfolio. As you may know, your father has at times worked for himself and owns a private company for that purpose. Before you were born, indeed before your parents married, his company bought this house and it is the registered address of the company.”

“I know about Dad’s company, I think it’s called Richard Smart Ltd, but I never knew it owned the house.”

“When you signed some legal documents three months ago, a new company was formed named Thomas Smart Ltd. This property is now owned by that company, as well as some other properties, stocks and shares.”

“But that’s not my name any more.”

“Exactly, which is why I asked you to remain here. Would you sign these documents to transfer all stock to Tamara Smart Ltd?”

Tammy walked round the table and signed. Angela opened and closed her mouth.

“I’d also like you to sign this order to wind up the former company.” Tammy did as asked.

“So, what does that make me worth?”

“We valued this house as £800,000 for the asset register, the apartment in Paris as €650,000 and shares in various companies at £1.4 million.”

“Thanks, I wasn’t entirely sure before now, but I have control of about three million quid?”

“That and a few things I haven’t mentioned, they’re all in this file.”

“I hope I don’t have to read it all before you leave?”

“No, but if there are any questions I’d like them before the end of the week.”

“That’s fine, but if you’re done with me I’d like to take Angela from the room before she faints on me.”

“Certainly.”

“Tammy, more coffee please.”

“Yes, Dad.”

Tammy sat Angela in the kitchen and gave her some iced water to drink whilst she organised some more coffee. Outside it was starting to rain, within a few minutes the garden was soaked.

“You’re worth that much?”

“Yes, but I can’t spend it, it’s a paper valuation.”

“But Tammy, three million?”

“It's a lot of bits of paper, not hard currency right now.”

“You weren’t upset or worried by all this?”

“Not this time, I fainted the first time I heard about it.”

“Oh.”

Tammy took the fresh coffee pot into the dining room, it looked as if her father was going to have a long meeting. She suggested Angela and herself head upstairs.

“Why?”

“It’s time we sorted those legs out.”

“Do I have to?”

“Resistance is futile.”

They returned upstairs to the bathroom that Tammy and Angela shared, Angela was still a little shy about undressing next to Tammy but this was wearing off.

“Okay, ideally I’d take you to see Joanne but she’s a bit far north at the moment. Instead we have this handy cream that my mum kept here. It should be much better than shaving, although we might have to tidy up a little afterwards. Left leg up first please.”

After Angela exited the shower there were indeed a few areas that needed a razor but the overall effect was good. Tammy rubbed in some soothing cream to reduce any soreness.

“You can’t put anything on your legs for a few hours so don’t plan on going outside. I think it's still raining anyway.”

“Are we done?”

“No, now we have to redo your make-up, it’s time for lesson number two.”

Tammy had Angela take off all her make-up and use a cleanser. Then she was shown how to apply foundation, with a stern warning not to over do it. The lesson continued with Angela trying to poke an eye or two out with mascara.

Eventually they went back downstairs at four o'clock, just as the men were finishing. Both seemed happy with the progress, copies of many of the papers would be going to Tara’s solicitor the following day.

As they strolled towards the front door they heard a key being inserted — from the outside.

Tamara's Début   Part Nineteen   by Shiraz

 
 
Monday 8th December continued
 

Whoever was outside was having trouble with their key and resorted to banging on the door. Richard opened it to investigate but the front door swung fully open revealing a soaked Tara, rain water visibly dripping off her nose.

She was carrying a small case and clearly had not expected to find anyone in the house, or that the lock had been changed in her absence. Richard and Tara looked at one another for a few seconds waiting for the other to speak, Tammy and Angela were standing behind Gerald: Tammy could feel the tension so moved forward.

“Hello, Mum.”

“Who? Tom? Why? Richard, did you do this?”

“Mum, my legal name is now Tamara so please call me that. Dad has done nothing to cause this, he’s just been very supportive.”

Richard decided he needed to take control. “Tara, either stay there or come in. Whichever you choose I’m closing this door to keep the rain out and the warmth in.”

Richard’s wife moved through the doorway and put her case on the floor in front of her; a puddle started to form underneath it. She now looked at the others stood in the hallway, starting with the other male. “Who are you?”

“Mrs Smart, my name is Gerald Watson. I am your husband’s solicitor.”

She then stared at Angela. “What are you?”

“Mum, that is not a nice way to treat a guest. She is my friend Angela and is at the same school as me.”

“I want you out of my house, all of you. I’ve had a bad enough day already and I don’t want to be disgraced by boys in skirts and an ex-husband who is no doubt doing this to get at me. Get out now!”

Gerald approached Tara and looked her straight in the eye. “Mrs Smart, this house has never belonged to you and is now owned by your daughter. I have the legal documents here if you wish to see them.”

“WHAT! Get out of my way. I don’t have a daughter, and if that’s what he’s become I don’t want a son either.”

She made a lunge for Tammy but slipped on the damp floor and ended up sprawled on the parquet tiling. She yelped in pain as she landed then found she couldn’t put any weight on her left foot. Despite her attitude issue Richard and Gerald helped her to her feet, removed her sodden jacket, and took her into the lounge, depositing her on the sofa. Tammy moved to check her mother’s ankle. “Keep away from me!”

“Mum, right now you’re in no position to command anything. I can either look at your ankle to see how bad it is or you can fester in your own self-pity, in which case I’ll happily call a taxi for you.”

“You wouldn’t dare?”

“Wouldn’t I? The last person to cross me ended up in a police cell and was almost certainly due to be taken in front of a magistrate this morning. You might be my mother but you’ve hardly been an inspiration to me.”

“You can’t talk to me like that, Tom.”

“Firstly, yes I can, and secondly, it appears that I need to remind you I’m now called Tamara, although I prefer Tammy. I’m sure Dad also has the legal paperwork for that somewhere, even my driving licence agrees with me. If you hadn’t noticed, it was my eighteenth birthday at the beginning of September, that removes several, if not all, of your rights over me.”

Tara began to cry, she hadn’t expected any of this and was having difficulty coming to grips with it. She had understood that Richard and her son were in Scotland, so hadn’t any inkling that the house would be occupied. Whilst she was sobbing Tammy removed her left shoe and knee-high stocking. Her ankle was blue and purple, much more bruising than could be explained from her fall a few minutes ago.

Richard showed some concern. “Tara, how did you do that?”

“I was in an accident this morning.”

“What sort of accident?”

“A car accident, I was on my way here, we went the wrong way round the roundabout by Brent Cross.”

Tammy got suspicious. “In a red Ferrari?”

“Yes——hmmmm, NO.”

“Tara, you said ‘we’, who was with you?”

“Nobody, Richard, I was on my own.” Just then her mobile started ringing. No number was shown, so she answered carefully. “Hello?” She waited, listening, before speaking again. “So when can I see him?” There was another pause. “Okay, I’ll be there at seven.” She killed the call.

“Tara, I guess that was the hospital that your driver is in. You never liked to drive sports cars, but I know you’d always let someone take you for a ride. What’s his name?” Richard was good at getting information.

“Freddy.”

“Now, Tara, if you’ll calm down we’ll organise some tea. Do you want to have that ankle looked at?”

“It’s been examined already, but they didn’t give me anything for the pain, mind you it wasn’t hurting much then: it is now though.”

“Right, I’m sure we can find some aspirin. We might be able to sort something else, as well. The only question is, are you going to be civil to your daughter and her friend?”

“I still don’t like this.”

“That wasn’t my question.”

“If you mean not shouting and screaming, I can manage that. What’s the alternative?”

“Tammy will call that taxi.”

“Richard, I will get everything you own for this, you know that?”

“Tara, we’ll talk when you’re capable of listening. Tammy, could you make a pot of tea?”

“Yes, Dad.” They left the room: Tammy and Angela went to the kitchen, Richard and Gerald to the dining room, leaving Tara on her own to argue with herself.

“Richard, this changes things somewhat but please don’t make any sudden decisions or accusations. Either Tara will tell us here or in court, if it gets that far.”

“Court?”

“If she was the passenger in a case of dangerous driving then she could be called as a witness, she would have to give her account of the accident, including the reason for the journey and her relationship with the driver.”

“I see, can we get anything from the Metropolitan Police?”

“I wouldn’t have thought so, Richard, we can only monitor it as and when the case goes to court. Of course the press might dig something up.”

“Okay. What do we do about her tonight?”

“That’s your decision. Obviously you will be uncomfortable with either option but putting her out would not be in your favour at a later date, do you have a spare room she could use?”

“Yes, the small room. She probably won’t like it though.”

Tammy returned, having heard the last exchange. “The tea’s on the way. D’you want me to make the bed? Perhaps we could also ask the girls to come over?”

“If you mean Andrea and Alison? Yes to both.”

Tammy returned to the kitchen and used her mobile to call Alison. Quickly, she explained the problem and invited them for dinner before heading upstairs, leaving Angela to fill the teapot. Tammy was back a few minutes later but said nothing to her mum. Angela had, in the meantime, distributed tea to everyone. Tara was alone once again.

Tammy and Angela joined the two men in the dining room: Gerald was speaking quietly to Richard, who was typing a statement about that afternoon’s unheralded arrival, which he faxed to Gerald’s office, giving it a date and time stamp, before giving Gerald a printed copy.

The next time any of them went to check on Tara, she’d fallen asleep, the cup of tea virtually untouched. Tammy headed to the kitchen, dragging Angela with her. It was clear to Tammy that Angela didn’t know how to cook, beyond switching on the kettle and burning toast. Tammy however had often cooked for her father, for her mother as well—but less often. Given that dinner was going to be a moveable feast—literally—she switched on the oven and started a casserole, knowing that it could be easily kept warm. Angela was tasked with chopping vegetables, starting with onions.

“My eyes!”

“You’ll get used to it, but don’t put your fingers in your eyes.”

“Why?”

“Just don’t. Wash your hands in the bathroom, I’m using the sink in here for cleaning the spuds. Splash some cold water on your face, it’ll help.”

Angela was back a few minutes later and seemed to cope better, successfully managing, somehow, not to cut herself.

An hour had passed when the doorbell rang. Thinking the girls had already managed to get across London, Tammy went straight to the door. She opened it to find two police officers standing in the rain.

“Hello, Miss, could you tell me if Mrs Tara Smart lives here?”

“Yes, she’s my mother, she’s just returned from Switzerland.”

“We’d like to speak to her.”

Her father, Gerald and Angela all appeared in the hallway behind her, Richard spoke: “What’s this about officer? I’m Richard Smart.”

“It concerns a road traffic accident, Sir, but I’m afraid that’s all I can say until we’ve spoken to Mrs Smart. Is she here?”

“Yes, she’s in there,” he pointed at the drawing room door, “asleep.” They wiped their feet on the mat and came in from the inclement weather. An offer of tea was declined as they entered the drawing room, closing the door behind them.

“Dad, what do you think is up?”

“Tammy, I’d rather not jump to any conclusions right now. Gerald, what’s your view?”

“Richard, the same. The offer of tea sounds inviting though.”

“Didn’t you have another appointment?” Tammy asked.

“Not for another hour, my original plan was to get back to my office first. Unfortunately I feel you may need some of my help here before the afternoon’s out. I’ll not charge for the hour on condition that you can supply anther decent cup of tea.”

“Deal.” The smell of the casserole was filling the air as the group sat in the dining room, wondering what was going on in the drawing room. Suddenly the doorbell rang, Richard decided he should open the door this time.

“Hi, Richard.”

“Hi, Richard, how are you?”

“Come in, girls, we’re in the dining room.” Alison and Andrea put their umbrellas down as the entered the house and followed Richard.

“Tammy!”

Tammy jumped up and ran towards the girls, giving them both a hug. Andrea noticed Angela, sat in a corner. “Hello, I’m Andrea, have we met?” Angela didn’t say a thing, she was definitely not comfortable with the idea of strangers, having two police in the house was bad enough. Tammy intervened. “Girls, this is Angela. She’s in the same year as me at St Andrew’s.”

“Hi, Angela.” This time it was in stereo, Angela started to cry. Tammy moved towards her but Andrea took over.

Alison took Tammy to one side. “So tell me, Tammy, what’s the latest in your life? Found a boy yet?”

“Of course not. I’m not ready for that yet.” Richard had overheard that remark and coughed loudly. “In any case, it looks like my Dad wants to check out any potential boyfriends.”

That had Gerald laughing and had also brought a smile to Angela, who by now was more comfortable with Andrea. Tammy went through the five minute update, finishing with Tara and her visitors.

“You mean they’re still here?”

“Yep.”

“What about her ankle?”

“She’s been asleep, so we haven’t checked it for a couple of hours.”

She had hardly finished speaking, when one of the police officers came out of the drawing room. “Excuse me, but Mrs Smart is complaining about her ankle. Are you aware about this?”

“Yes, she slipped on her way in but the bruising was more severe than if it was just from her fall. These two ladies are hospital nurses, so I’m sure they could offer any medical advice.”

“I’m afraid we’d need her to be seen by the FME¹ at the station.”

Richard spoke, “The station? Why would that be?”

“I’m afraid I can’t go into that.”

“But, she’s my wife.”

“Unfortunately she’s told us that you’ve separated. We have some questions for her that we weren’t able to ask earlier on account of her not waiting for us at Chase Farm Hospital; that’s all I can say I’m afraid. She’ll be at Edgware Police Station for a while, the doctor will check Mrs Smart before we interview her again.”

Richard decided there was little point in continuing the discussion so just stood there as Tara was helped out of the house by the policemen, her only protection from the rain was the still-damp jacket she’d been wearing. The police car was parked further along the street, out of sight of the front door. He noted that they had left her case in the hallway, in fact they’d not asked about it.

“Gerald, is there anything we can do?”

“I’ll give her solicitor a call. I know Terry quite well, we belong to the same golf club.”

“Small world isn’t it?”

“For the legal profession it is.”

Gerald made a call on his mobile then left with the many documents. The four girls moved to the kitchen where Tammy was finalising the casserole; she'd just put the new potatoes and fresh vegetables in the steamer.

Richard went to his office and set about filing the new documents, this would take a while as he also wanted to scan several of them into his computer then upload them to a server.

Back in the kitchen Angela was being questioned, gently, by Alison and Andrea. Tammy warned them to go easy on her, given Angela’s short existence. Of course, plans were made for the following day, Tuesday, as Alison wasn’t working.

“Just my luck,” Andrea was not pleased. “I landed a training course that’ll keep me busy all day. Alison’s is next week.”

“What’s it for?” Tammy tried to sound interested.

“Infection control—all about stopping the spread of winter flu.”

“Oh. I didn’t think that was a problem this year.”

“It isn’t right now, but it will be if we don’t keep the standards up.”

That last comment killed the conversation, Tammy stood and checked the dinner, then turned off the oven.

“Not long now. We’ll eat in here, there’s room for five around the table. Angela, can you give it a wipe, Alison, there are place mats over there,” Tammy pointed at the dresser, “Andrea the cutlery is in the left hand drawer.”

Tammy picked up five plates and popped them in the oven to warm them, then she walked to her father’s office to give him a five-minute warning. Back in the kitchen she served the meal, one idea had been to open a bottle of Merlot but she knew that anything could happen that evening and they all needed to keep a clear head.

Tammy’s concern was valid but nothing of note did happen. Andrea and Alison left just before nine and the others went to bed an hour later, having run out of conversation and energy.

 
 
Tuesday 9th December
 

Tuesday morning started grey, sleet was forecast but didn’t appear. The rain, however, was cold, driven by a stiff breeze.

“Dad, what are we going to do today?”

“Tanya is coming over to see me in an hour, otherwise it’s a clear day.”

“I’d like to take Angela to Brent Cross, but I’m a bit worried about mum—perhaps I should stay here, just in case?”

“Tammy, I’ll speak to Gerald. He might have some news by now from your mother’s solicitor. One thing is that she would have been home last night if it was a minor issue. There’s nothing either of us can do, so how about you and Angela heading down there on the tube? Angela can borrow my Oyster card—yours is probably in your room. I don’t think you took it to Scotland?”

“It wouldn’t be much use up there! I’ll get Angela ready, she still needs help choosing clothes. I’ll let Alison know the plan.”

“Fair enough, I’ll get some coffee going.”

An hour later, just before ten, Angela and Tammy headed out into the foul weather. Given the strong breeze it was pointless to take an umbrella so they used hooded coats, Tara had left a couple in her wardrobe that fitted the two girls. Conversation was impossible until they reached Edgware Underground Station.

“Angela, take this card. I think there’s plenty of credit on it.”

“What is it?”

“An Oyster card, you have heard about them, haven’t you?”

“No, I’ve never been to London before.”

Tammy quickly explained the prepay card and showed Angela how to open the gate by tapping the card on the yellow pad. They headed onto the platform, this was yet another new experience.

“Tammy, I can see Brent Cross on the Underground map.”

“That's right, but it’s not in the shopping centre and there’s a major road in the way can’t get to the shopping centre directly by Tube so we’ll change at Brent Cross and take a bus. It’s near the same area where we turned around yesterday morning.”

Angela found it rather strange on the Northern Line train. Tammy had insisted on a skirt again so, under Tammy's advice, she sat with her knees together trying not to look at the other passengers sitting opposite her. The line was mostly in a cutting although there were sections that were fully underground. Angela spent her time staring at the tube map, counting down the stations. Angela leaned over the whisper in Tammy's ear.

“That guy keeps looking at me, he must think I’m weird.”

“No more weird that half of the other passengers who use the Tube, there are people who spend the whole day going round and round the Circle Line.”

“Oh.”

They exited at Brent Cross station and walked off the platform, up the stairs and into the ticket hall.

"Put the card on that yellow pad and walk through the gate when it opens.”

Tammy’s phone buzzed, there was a text from Alison offering her apologies and wishing Tammy good luck for her appointment the following day. Outside they found a red number 210 bus and took it for the short ride to the front of the shopping centre. Tammy was in her element here, she knew her way through the different levels, but first took Angela to Fenwicks, where she spoke to an assistant in the hat department.

“Excuse me but my friend needs a new wig, do you have something in a brunette, about shoulder length?”

The assistant looked at Tammy then at Angela, who was convinced in her mind that they’d be sent away.

“Real hair or artificial?”

“Real, please.”

The assistant walked across to a cupboard and opened it. She selected three brunette wigs and brought each to the counter.

“Would you like to try them?” She pointed at an area shielded by a curtain. Both girls entered, each carrying one wig, still atop its plastic head.

Neither of the first two wigs suited Angela so Tammy went back for the third. This one was shorter than the others, finishing several inches above her shoulders. It did, however, suit her. They walked back to the counter.

“That looks perfect, Miss. Would you like to wear it?”

Angela nodded while Tammy handed over her debit card with her father’s shareholder discount card. The assistant took both without a second glance and processed the sale. Angela’s eyes opened wide when she saw the price. The assistant handed the cards back to Tammy then boxed the head before handing that to Angela.

As they walked away towards Angela decided she had a long list of questions. Tammy led her to the café, Angela sat, sweeping her skirt under her then pushing the hair from her eyes. She wasn’t even aware what she’d done. Angela’s confidence had also just risen another notch—she had seen nothing of the former schoolboy in the mirror a few minutes earlier.

Tammy organised coffee and pastries for them, returning to find Angela smiling broadly.

“What’s up with you?”

“Thank you.” Angela got up and walked over to Tammy where she kissed her friend’s cheek before returning to her seat.

“Wow, you must really be grateful.”

“I am, you’ve allowed me to realise my dream. I don’t know how I’m going to repay you.”

She started sobbing gently. This time it was Tammy’s turn to get up and walk round the table.

“Angela, you are going to ruin your make-up. Don’t cry, just enjoy this.” Tammy gave her a kiss on her cheek, returning the favour, and returned to her seat to drink her coffee.

Ten minutes later they both had crumbs around their lips, as well as on their laps. As soon as the last of the coffee had been downed, Tammy pulled Angela into the nearby loo.

“We’re going to be hitting the shops hard so have a wee before you redo your face.”

Angela did as she was told. A few minutes later she was standing in front of the mirror applying fresh mascara and lipstick.

Tammy commented on how well she’d done it. “You’re learning fast, but keep it simple.”

Then they made their way around the stores, collecting clothes, shoes and bags. What stopped them, eventually, was they’d run out of hands to carry the bags. Travelling back on a bus was ceasing to be a sensible option. Tammy went to a nearby cash-point to withdraw some cash.

They started walking towards the taxi rank at the front of the mall. They were just short of the glass doors when there was a shout behind them. A man with a swarthy Mediterranean appearance was being chased by two policemen. Tammy had two choices at this point, and she knew which one to use.

She ushered Angela to one side, leaving her own bags with her friend; she then took up position between the pursued man and the automatic doors. The police officers were gaining but she knew they’d never catch him before he left the building. As he approached, Tammy moved forward, forcing him to her left towards a patch of floor marked by a ‘Caution, cleaning in progress’ sign.

As soon as he set foot on the wet patch, his feet slid from under him and he landed hard on the floor in obvious pain. When the officers reached Tammy, she recognised one of them from the previous evening.

“Hello again, Miss. Thank you, but I think that was rather foolhardy.”

“Perhaps, but I figured you were chasing him for a reason and were going to lose him if he made it through the door.”

“As I said, Miss, you could have been hurt. He’s not a nice man, we’ve been looking for him since he assaulted a nurse and a police officer at Chase Farm Hospital. I must admit that he ran well for a man who’d been in a car crash.”

While the officer was talking, his colleague cuffed the man. Other officers had also now arrived to take him to a waiting van. Tammy was, of course, asked to give them her personal details. Angela just stood there—open mouthed.

Tammy grabbed her bags and urged Angela to follow her through the doors. They landed in the back of a Hackney cab before Angela could ask anything. However, Tammy would answer no questions during the fifteen minute taxi ride back to the house.

Tammy's key was somewhere in the bottom of her bag so she rang the bell; as Richard opened the door they burst into the house with the many bags, relieved to be back. Richard closed the door and turned towards the girls, Tammy saw his face and dropped the bags, signalling to Angela to do likewise. Both took off their borrowed coats as Richard ushered them into the sitting room.

“Tammy, apparently your mother’s going to be charged with a serious offence. I can’t imagine for one minute she’s actually guilty but the main suspect is missing. Apparently he’s dangerous.”

“Dad, I’ve a feeling we met him.”

“When?”

“Twenty minutes ago, at Brent Cross.”

“What?”

“There was this man—swarthy, so he could have been Italian or whatever. Anyway, he tried to run away and I stopped him.”

“You WHAT?”

“I blocked him so he slipped.”

“Tammy, was that sensible? I mean, you could have got hurt.”

“That’s what the policeman said. He was one of the coppers who was here last night.”

“Did he say anything else?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Look, it’s the middle of the afternoon and I bet you haven’t had any lunch?”

“Err, no.”

“There’s some fresh bread and chilled soup in the kitchen, can you sort that out?”

“Sure, have you had anything to eat yourself?”

“Not yet, talking to Gerald about Tara took longer than I expected, and then I had to deal with another police officer who called here - this is getting very serious."

Tammy suggested to Angela that she should take the bags upstairs while Tammy headed into the kitchen to start the late lunch.

While the soup was warming she returned to her father.

“Dad, how serious is it?”

“From what Gerald tells me, it seems that HM Customs & Excise are now involved. He doesn’t know the details as her solicitor hasn’t said much so far, but he’s offered me a few guesses based on the way the police are handling the case. An hour ago her suitcase was collected from here and I was asked if anyone had opened, or even touched it. The officer who was here put on a pair of gloves before he took it and then asked me for my fingerprints, for elimination he claimed. I phoned Gerald straight away.”

“What did he say?”

“To co-operate, nothing more.”

“Oh.”

Tammy returned to the kitchen and served the three bowls of soup.

After the late lunch the two girls went upstairs to pack their cases. Richard returned to his office, apparently unaware that Angela was now wearing a wig.

The girls spent several hours upstairs, Tammy giving lessons on clothing and make-up. By six both were worn out and Tammy headed downstairs.

“Dad, what about dinner?”

“I though we could have a Ruby?”

“Sure, who do I call?”

“How about the Raj?”

“What on earth’s a Ruby?” asked a confused-looking Angela.

“A Ruby Murray.”

“I still don’t understand; you seem to be talking in riddles.”

“It’s rhyming slang for curry.”

Angela seemed even more confused, which prompted a few more examples of rhyming slang, mostly clean ones. Eventually she returned to her next question.

“So, who was Ruby Murray?”

“A singer and actress from Belfast.”

That of course added no sense to the conversation.

Tammy had warmed three plates by the time the delivery arrived, although there was a distinct danger of indigestion by the time they had finished. Angela was the first victim, having not realised how spicy it was. She was questioned by Richard as she left the table.

“Angela, I get the feeling you look different?”

Tammy intervened, “Dad, hadn’t you noticed?”

“No, what is it?”

“Doh!”

The table descended into near chaos as Richard finally worked out what Angela was wearing. Finally, they all headed up the apples and pears for a shower before bed, knowing there would be an early start the following day.

(1) Force Medical Examiner (Police doctor)

Tamara's Début   Part Twenty   by Shiraz

 
 
Wednesday 10th December
 

The alarm went off at five o’clock, a time alien to most people — even those at private boarding schools. Tammy forced herself into the bathroom before going to wake Angela.

She found her friend curled up in the duvet, oblivious to the shape looming over her. Suddenly Tammy pulled the duvet off the bed, Angela stirred as soon as cold air reached her skin.

“You!”

“Get up, we’re leaving in twenty minutes.”

“Can’t I stay here?”

“NO!”

To prevent her friend from returning to her slumber, Tammy took the duvet with her, dropping it on her own bed as she headed for her wardrobe. Given the lack of time, Angela was being left to fend for herself, although her make-up could be done later, providing she had a close shave before they left.

Tammy dressed for comfort, not fashion, and pulled on a pair of soft jeans. She went for the many layers approach above her waist, knowing that most could be removed as she warmed up, however unlikely that would be on this December day.

Richard, in the meantime, had dressed and was now pouring orange juice for them. Tammy was the next one downstairs.

“No breakfast, Dad?”

“No, we’ll get some at the airport.”

“Right, I suppose I ought to check on Angela, how long do we have?”

“Ten minutes, no longer. Can you bring your cases down?”

“Sure.”

Tammy found Angela rushing everything and achieving next to nothing. She had nicked her chin with a razor so was trying to stem the blood. Tammy made a cold compress from a towelling flannel and a little of London’s finest tap water, then held this to Angela’s chin for a minute.

Of course, the sight of Angela’s lopsided, twisted, bra, mismatched knickers and a razor caused Tammy to snigger. That was the best she could do, she really wanted to laugh but knew it would hurt Angela.

“What’s funny?”

Tammy quickly said something that she hoped wouldn’t offend Angela, “Oh, I don’t remember the last time I had to shave.”

“Are you sure that’s what it was?”

“Yes, move! Now we've sorted out your legs, you can wear thinner tights today but put on the same skirt you wore yesterday, it’ll do for now. You’ve got five minutes.”

Somehow the two managed to make it to the car, but not quite in the ten minutes Richard had specified. They were, at least, on their way to Stansted just before half-past five in the morning, the plan was that Tanya would collect the car from the airport that afternoon. The head for Angela's wig was also too much for their journey so that would be left in the car ready to be sent to the McPherson's house.

Most of the traffic was heading into London but the North Circular was again awful, but as soon as they reached the M11 the traffic dissipated. Richard drove to a short term carpark and soon found a space, they only had to wait a few minutes for the next bus to the terminal.

At security Angela encountered a problem once again. Not only was there a female holding a male’s passport but this female was a brunette with plenty of hair versus the male with a standard schoolboy cut. An animated discussion took place with Angela having to suffer the discomfort of removing her wig for the purposes of identification. She was somewhat fraught by the time they made it into the departure lounge.

Richard worked out they had at least forty-five minutes before their seven thirty flight. “Breakfast?”

Of course, Richard had asked a stupid question, he and the girls had been up for ninety minutes so far without any chance of food. There are always at least six places to eat in any large airport departure lounge, Stansted is no different. They headed for one that wasn’t crowded.

By the time they finished they were well fed but it hadn’t been cheap; even Richard was surprised at the overall cost. Their flight was called shortly afterwards.

They were flying directly to Glasgow but had allowed for any delays plus an hour to get from Glasgow Airport to the hospital. Angela, however, was still trying to work out why she’d been forced out of bed at five for Tammy’s eleven o’clock appointment.

She decided the only way this would make sense would be if she ordered a coffee on the plane after take-off. She fell asleep well before the seatbelt sign went off, and without that coffee.

Tammy also wanted to doze for a short while but took the chance to check her make-up in the cramped WC before returning to her seat for forty winks.

Both girls awoke as the seatbelt sign went back on and the captain announced their imminent arrival at Glasgow, thankfully the flight had arrived on time and was trouble free. Just after they walked into the terminal, Tammy grabbed Angela and pushed her into the nearest loo.

“I don’t need to go!”

“You do need to sort out your face though.”

“Oh.”

“I suggest you have a wash, but be a good girl and have a wee, you might not get a chance for another hour.”

Angela did as she was told. The girls took a quarter of an hour in total before they rejoined Richard. He knew better than to ask questions, Tara had been just as bad. His face, however, showed impatience.

“Come on.”

They marched to the taxi rank, Richard having decided it was the easiest and quickest way for the three of them, plus cases, to get into the city. The journey wasn’t too difficult and placed them, at Queen St Station, half an hour later.

Richard made his way to the left luggage office and deposited their bags. Then they caught another taxi to the hospital. Tammy later noted that they could have walked the route without difficulty.

“Dad, why did we just leave the bags at the station?”

“There’s no direct flights to Wick from Glasgow today, so it’s easier to take the train, albeit more time consuming.”

Glasgow Royal Infirmary is an impressive building by any standards; they entered by means of the marbled steps and sought directions from the information desk. A few minutes later the three of them arrived in a small waiting area outside Professor Robert’s office just after ten thirty.

Richard wanted to go and find some coffee for the three of them but knew this was a bad idea. His fortitude paid off when Tammy was invited early into the Professor’s room, Richard started to rise but one look by Tammy kept him in his seat next to Angela.

“Good morning, Tammy.”

“’Morning, Professor.”

“How are you today?”

“Tired: just in from London.”

“I’ll keep this short then, if that’s alright with you?”

“I’ll bow to your better judgement.”

Julian Roberts guided Tammy to a coffee table and low comfortable chairs, his oak desk sat to one side, some papers were on the table. He poured both of them a glass of water before continuing.

“That makes me sound more important than you, Tammy you’re the most important person in this room right now—and don’t forget it.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Enough of that, how are you finding life as a girl?”

“I’m doing fine, I’ve only had a couple of recent problems and the last one was my mother.”

“Do you want to discuss it?”

“No, it resolved itself.” Tammy felt she may have said that a little too abruptly.

Julian decided to leave that topic so asked Tammy first about progress at her school then the theatre and her personal life before returning to the earlier topic.

“So did you have any doubts after seeing her? After all, this was your own mother?”

“No, I just surprised her, it seems that she hadn’t known about me until that point, although I'd notified her in writing last week.”

Julian Roberts paused and made a few notes on a pad.

“Why hadn’t you told her on the phone?”

“I wasn’t sure how she’d react, in that respect I was proven right.”

“How did you handle it?”

“I threatened to put her in a taxi and send her away from the house.”

“Would you have done?”

“Yes.”

“What about your father?”

“He had no say in the matter; I own the house.”

“I see——” Julian Roberts paused again and wrote more notes, leaving his last words floating. He put down his pen after a minute and looked straight into Tammy’s eyes.

“There’s something you’re not telling me.”

“There is?”

“You’re protecting something, or someone. If it isn’t your mother, who is it?”

“I’m not sure if I have the right to say anything.”

“This will be in complete confidence, you know that.”

“Right, but she’s very insecure.”

“Who?”

“Angela.”

“Who is Angela?”

“She’s at my school—she’s like me.”

“And you’re helping her?”

“Yes, she’s been in London with me and is outside this room right now.”

“How long have you been helping her?”

“A week.”

“We’ll come back to her in a minute, if that’s okay? I have your last blood results here and Dr Yates’ report. She is transferring a decision to me that I’m not normally ready to make at this stage.”

“I understand.”

“I hope you do, because this is quite unusual. Your body is not producing enough hormones, male or female. Helen Yates believes you’ll start having real medical problems soon, building to serious issues within a few years, she recommends hormone treatment immediately.”

“So she said.”

“My problem is that under the usual protocol I’m not happy to prescribe hormones after only two consultations.”

“So you won’t do anything now?”

“I didn’t say that, Tammy.”

“Sorry.”

“I should think so. As I was saying, this is an unusual case. I have therefore spoken to a colleague in London, it turns out you have already met one of her team.”

“I have?”

“Yes, Sally Yates works for Tricia Jacobs at the London.”

“Oh.”

“Did you also know that Sally is Helen Yates’ sister-in-law?”

“No, that must be why she was in the area.”

“Perhaps she didn’t mention that for a reason?”

Tammy wondered back to her meeting with James, Sally and Becky a few days earlier. Had she said anything wrong? Julian Roberts must have seen her fear.

“Tammy, don’t worry. She was very impressed, especially the way you handled Angela.”

“You knew!”

“Yes, I suppose it’s now my turn to be sorry. Look, the whole point of this is that Dr Jacobs has looked over the same reports that I have seen, with the bonus that Sally has spent over an hour in your company. Sally Yates described you in her report as very confident, very natural.”

“She wrote a report on me? How could she?” Tammy was becoming upset, the Professor handed her a tissue and paused while she dabbed her eyes.

“Tammy, it was at my request, and helped making my decision a little easier.”

“So what was your decision?” Tammy had calmed but was still clenching the tissue.

“That I’ll recommend you commence oestrogen straight away. We’ll start with a low dose to satisfy Helen Yates’ request and increase the dosage after we’ve met a few more times.”

“Is that it?”

“No, you need something else.” He handed over an envelope. “There’s a letter in there you’ll want. Congratulations.”

Tammy carefully opened the unsealed envelope and pulled out three copies of the same letter, advising anyone that Tammy was transgendered and, as such, protected by the full extent of the law, he’d quoted both Scottish and English law as a precaution. She re-read the letter several times before she was satisfied she understood it. She noticed he had written that Dr Jacobs had reviewed the decision and concurred, that looked to Tammy like a little insurance on the Professor’s behalf, but decided not to mention it.

She shook the envelope and a prescription fell out, attached to a note to her GP. She put all of these back in the envelope.

“I thought you couldn’t do this yet? I mean I wanted this but I wasn’t expecting it.”

“Tammy, I had to weigh up the issues here so I could do my best for you. The concerns here are your physical health, followed by your mental health. As I said, I would not normally prescribe anything until we had met a few more times, even then I could not promise anything without very careful consideration. The issue is that after a while, perhaps six months, your body would not react kindly if we replaced those hormones with male ones because you have changed your mind. Are you likely to do that?"

“No, of course not.” Tammy began to cry, this time it was tears of happiness as she realised what the Professor had done for her..

“Tammy, why don’t you go and speak to your father, perhaps you could send Angela in here?”

Tammy stood up slowly. Julian Roberts rose at the same time and held out his hand. Tammy shook it before she left the room clutching the envelope.

Richard and Angela rose, ready to leave.

“No, Dad, he wants to see Angela now.”

“Me, why?”

There was a voice behind Tammy: “Because I’d like to get to know you better if you are going to be one of my patients.”

Angela was still unsure. “Angela, it’s fine—he’ll be gentle, at least more gentle than with me.” She spun round and fixed her eyes on the Professor.

“Of course I will. Now, dear, come in here.” He closed the door behind Angela.

“Tammy, did you arrange that?” Richard was unsure what to make of it.

“No, he already knew about Angela through Sally Yates. She works for a colleague of his at the London.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got the letter, and a prescription for the pills.”

Tammy sat down and started to sob again, her make-up was definitely ruined. Richard handed her a coffee, it wasn’t very hot but was welcome, regardless.

“When did you get these?”

“I didn’t, I asked Angela to go to the café for us. I’m sorry it’s cooled a little but we didn’t know how long you’d be.

Tammy sipped the coffee, it was still warm but wouldn’t be for long. She decided half way down the plastic cup that she’d had enough and excused herself to the nearest Ladies, taking her cold coffee and shoulder bag with her.

Tammy poured the cold coffee down the toilet before using it herself. Once done she disposed of the cup and washed her hands and face before re-applying her make-up. It only took her ten minutes—practice definitely helped.

Back in the small waiting area she saw Angela coming out of the Professor’s room, a broad smile on her face. Julian Roberts shook everyone’s hand before they headed out of the hospital at eleven thirty. Angela wasn’t saying much and Tammy decided not to ask yet.

A taxi took them back to Queen Street station where Richard bought tickets to Aberdeen, after retrieving their luggage.

“Dad, why Aberdeen?”

“Because we’ll not get back to Thurso in time for your rehearsal tonight if we take the train the whole way.”

“Oh, I’d forgotten about that.”

“It’s a good job I hadn’t.”

Tammy wanted to ask another question but they were alerted by a call for passengers to board the waiting train.

“You two, get some rest, I’ll wake you at Aberdeen.”

That simple statement brought no arguments from either girl, who were asleep within a few minutes. Angela had wondered how they would get from Aberdeen to Thurso but Tammy already knew the answer to that question so said nothing.

Richard had been sitting there for a few minutes when his mobile rang.

“Hello?”

“Richard, it’s Gerald. I have an update for you.”

“Good afternoon, Gerald, fire away.”

“Right, Tara was charged with money laundering and is out on bail. She was warned not to go back to the house and the magistrates court have put a temporary seizure notice on her assets.”

“Oh, how’s she going to manage?”

“I’m told she has access to a Swiss account, which wasn’t declared to the court.”

“I set up that account for us a couple of years ago.”

“So you could close it?”

“Yes, but let’s leave it for now, I can keep an eye on what’s being spent.”

“If you think that’s a good idea. Anyway, the charge relates to half a million euros found in the car along with a kilo of cocaine.”

“Coke?” Richard whispered the word so as not to attract unwanted attention from fellow travellers. “she’d never get involved in that.”

“The police would seem to agree with you, the driver has been charged with smuggling and intent to supply, as well as several other offences.”

“I take it he’s not been bailed?”

“That’s right, especially as the police don’t know for certain who he is. So far they believe he is Alban Berisha, an Albanian. He was travelling in a false Italian identity, Alfredo Giovanni.”

“Freddy?”

“Yes, it appears Tara knew him as an Italian and was quite taken by him and his cars.”

“That’s what I thought, he had been staying in the apartment, hadn’t he?”

“I don’t know for certain, but you may be correct.”

“So, what’s next?”

“Tara has to return to court on Monday and can’t leave the country. She’s booked into an hotel, a cheap one apparently, and has gone to Brent Cross to buy clothes and other bits, the police haven’t yet returned her case.”

“Thanks for the update, Gerald, of course you have my fax number in Thurso if you need to send anything.”

“I do, bye for now, Richard.”

Richard spent the next hour wondering what Tara had become involved in, and whether he would be questioned. The police who had collected Tara’s suitcase hadn’t asked for Richard’s mobile number but Tammy had given her details when Freddy had been caught. Richard’s other concern was whether he ought to be in London the following Monday? Despite the divorce, the apparent infidelity and everything that had happened over the past two days he still cared what happened to Tara.

They pulled into Aberdeen mid afternoon, Richard ushered the two girls, now fully awake, to a taxi and told the driver to take them to the airport. Once there they boarded the waiting helicopter for the 45 minute ride to Thurso, arriving just after five.

Elsie was waiting for them and insisted they headed for the dining room as soon as they’d washed. Angela stood in front of the large mirror in her bathroom, at least the one she’d used a few days earlier, and contemplated changing her clothes so Tim would reappear. Any thought disappeared when Tammy grabbed her.

“Come on, you’ll miss dinner, Miss.”

Not spotting the pun, Angela followed Tammy down the wide staircase and into the dining room where Elsie and Richard were waiting. They sat down to a wholesome plate of stew, exactly what was needed on this cold December evening. While they were waiting for the dessert Elsie spoke to Angela.

“Angela, you’ll be staying here for a few days. Unfortunately your mother has had to go south as your father had lodged divorce papers in an English court, she’ll be back at the weekend if all goes well.”

“I need to change Elsie, did mum leave me some clothes?”

“I’m afraid not, she left in a hurry. Because of the divorce she had the locks changed and hasn’t given anyone a spare key as far as I know.”

“What about the clothes I took off here?”

“She took them home with her.”

“Oh, what about school?” Angela was becoming fraught by now. She’d been growing comfortable as Angela away from Thurso but had expected to revert to being Tim on her return.

“I’m waiting for a call from Steven, I mean the headmaster. Don’t worry about it.”

“But I’m due at the theatre soon! I can’t appear like this!”

“I’d have to agree with you, you could really do with smartening yourself, you’re not acting are you.”

“No, I may have to climb into the gantry, that’s if I don’t get laughed out of the theatre.”

“How many there have met Tim?”

“Not many Elsie, why?”

“So if Angela was there we’d only have to speak to a few people.”

“But how do we explain this?” She tugged at her skirt.

Tammy answered that one, “How about you explain you’ve come from a party and didn’t have time to change? It isn’t that far from the truth.”

“Are you sure that will work, I mean what if John Hibbert recognises me? My name will be round the school like wildfire.”

“Leave John to me. Look, I agree on one thing though, you can’t climb up to the gantry in a skirt, however, I’ve got some trousers that’ll fit you.”

The dessert — apple pie with custard — arrived, concentration soon returned to the food and not Angela’s issues. Having eaten, Tammy persuaded Angela to head up to her room, as they arrived Leanne came out of the room Angela had used.

“Excuse me, Miss, I’ve emptied your case and hung the clothes that didn’t need cleaning, the rest are in the laundry room. Madame McPherson tells me that you’ll be staying with us for a few more days.”

Leanne then disappeared along the corridor and through an unmarked door. The girls continued to Tammy’s room to find the trousers, which Angela soon discovered to be bright pink.

Tamara's Début   Part Twenty One   by Shiraz

 
 
Wednesday 10th December Continued
 

“Pink?”

“Why, Angela?”

She fumbled for a reason. “It's not my colour.”

Tammy went back to her wardrobe and pulled out a black pair of leggings. Angela slipped off her shoes and skirt then pulled them over her tights, fortunately her top was long enough to cover anything questionable. She replaced her heeled shoes without thinking.

“Come on, let’s get going.”

Tammy opened the door and headed downstairs, Angela followed but was becoming unsure of herself—again. They put on heavy winter coats for the ride to the theatre.

Richard was holding the car door open, they could hear that the engine was already running. The girls jumped in, fastened their seat-belts, Richard set off for the theatre a few moments later.

They were halfway there when Angela finally realised what was bugging her—her shoes!

“Tammy, I’ve got to go back.”

“Why?”

“I have to change my shoes, look.”

Tammy looked down and saw the kitten heeled shoes that Angela had already been wearing for thirteen hours without complaint. “What’s wrong with them?”

“I can’t wear them.”

“Why not, they go well with the leggings.”

“That’s not the point, I mean I can’t wear them at the theatre; they think I’m a boy.”

“That would be hard to justify, given the rest of you.”

Angela was silenced by the remark. A few hours earlier, in Professor Roberts’ room, she’d explained her feelings and had heard nothing but words of support. Of course Julian Roberts hadn’t actually asked too many questions, he’d mostly listened to the effervescent Angela. The issue right now was that Angela had regained her doubts as soon as the real world re-imposed itself.

She wanted to cry but knew it would ruin her make-up: there was no doubt that Angela had mixed emotions. Within a few minutes they were pulling into the Mill Theatre’s car park. Angela had regained her composure and allowed Tammy to take her to whatever fate awaited.

“Tammy, get into your costume—now!” Iain was obviously not having a good evening.

“And who the hell are you?” He was staring at Angela.

“I’m the assistant lighting technician, Mr Brown.”

Iain wanted to ask questions but urgently needed a lighting technician, the senior one had slipped on ice that morning and this had been just one of his many problems, now at least he could concentrate on the other issues.

“What are you waiting for, off you go!”

Angela needed no other prompt and headed for the lighting desk. She knew the routine; she’d just never run through it for real. Angela set the stage for the start of the performance, Iain noticed the lights change and relaxed slightly.

Tammy was getting changed with Tanya, who was playing ‘Maria’.

“Did you have a good time in London, Tammy?”

“Let’s just say it was memorable.”

A girl Tammy hadn’t seen before was visiting each of the dressing rooms checking names against the cast and backstage crew list, looking for any changes. They were given a five minute warning and just had time for Joanne to put on the make-up. Joanne whispered “good luck” into Tammy’s ear before sending them to the stage.

At the interval Tammy was parched, and tired, but the rehearsal was going well. She took some water in the dressing room as Joanne touched up her make-up.

“Tammy, when are you going to make another appointment to see me?”

“I don’t know.”

“My diary is filling up, it’s only just over two weeks before Christmas. Give Sandy a call in the morning.”

“Okay.”

Tammy didn’t have the energy to argue, she just wanted to finish the show and get home.

The stage call came sooner than she hoped and she was thrown back into the lion’s den. Fortunately she managed to make it to the end without any hiccups. What really helped was that Tammy had known the songs before she was offered the part, she only had to learn the dialogue.

Iain thanked the cast before allowing them back to the dressing rooms, there was a sigh of relief as he closed the show.

As she finished changing back into her own clothes, Iain knocked on the dressing room door. Tanya had already left so Tammy was on her own.

“Tammy, that was wonderful.”

“Thank you.”

“You look tired. I’m glad you decided to be here tonight, I wasn’t certain you would be.”

“Neither was I, it was an earlier start for myself and Angela this morning.”

“Angela?”

“I mean Tim.”

“I meant to ask earlier what was going on but there were just too many problems. I saw you both arrive but I thought the assistant lighting technician was a sixth former at St Andrews School, perhaps you can answer?”

“I’d love to but I feel it would be best coming from her. Let me just say that if you’re satisfied with the job she did tonight then allow her to do the same for the real performances.”

“So this isn’t a wind-up?”

“No.”

“I see.”

“I suggest you speak to Jill Davison if you have any queries, I’m sure she could help.”

“If you say so, anyway great performance, I hope you can do the same tomorrow onwards.”

“So do I.” Tammy made a mental note for herself to speak to Jill in the morning. She met Angela outside where Richard was waiting with a warm car.

“Angela, did you have any problems?”

“No, I was on my own most of the time, but I did get asked my name by a girl, I just told her I was Angela.”

“Okay, Iain asked me about you.”

“Oh.”

“I know we said we’d tell him this was just a prank, but I said to him that Angela would be back there for the performances.”

“Why?"

“That girl you saw will be changing Tim’s name on the backstage list to Angela. Angela has to be there, not Tim.”

Angela sat in silence as they drove back to the house, the snow was falling heavier and Richard had difficulty seeing the road: thankfully his car had sufficient grip to keep them safe, apart from Richard having Alpine driving experience.

Back in the house, both Angela and Tammy headed straight to their beds, declining an offer of hot chocolate. Angela continued her nightly routine—started only a few nights earlier—and finally slipped into bed in a cotton nightie.
 
 
Thursday 11th December
 
The next morning started much as any other and Angela went straight into the shower after her alarm sounded at seven. Somehow her mobile was now plugged into its charger, having last been seen in her case with a dead battery.

The ’phone was ringing as Angela, in a kimono style gown, headed back into her bedroom.

“Hello?”

“Hello is that Tim Small? This is Mrs Adams at St Andrews. I understand you’re staying with the McPhersons?”

Angela suddenly realised that today was a school day and she was expected there before nine. Her next few replies were cautious.”

“Yes, is that a problem?”

“Not at all, I have been told that your mother won’t be back for a few days and you have no access to your house.”

“That’s right, although I’m still seeing if I can get into school this morning.” She was not entirely sure how that would be achieved—she needed to go shopping for some male clothes but would have to go into town as Angela. School would become a serious problem were she to arrive there en femme.

“Don’t worry, Mrs McPherson has explained how anxious and worried you are and has suggested we send some work over to you. The school messenger will be there at about ten, he will have some work for Tom, I mean Tammy, Smart too.”

“Okay, is that all?”

“I think so, if I need to call you again I’ll use the house phone—unless that’s a problem?”

“Not at all.”

“’Bye then.”

“’Bye, thank you.”

Angela sat on her bed and put her head in her hands, she was still there several minutes later when Elsie McPherson knocked gently on the door before entering.

“Angela, it’s alright. Come on dear, sit up.”

Angela took her hands from her red face, Elsie was holding a tissue which she used to dab Angela’s eyes.

“What have I done, what have I done?”

“Angela dear, you’re done nothing apart from let your true self surface. Now, come with me and we’ll get you decent for the day.”

Half an hour later Angela arrived in the dining room, now wearing jeans and a sweater. She was wearing minimal make-up and in her wig still looked nothing like Tim. Tammy was already sitting there, munching some toast.

“Good morning, sleepy-head!”

Angela just glared at Tammy, clearly Tammy knew nothing about Angela’s phone call and the thoughts it had stirred but that did not excuse her flippant remark. Angela decided that silence was the best offence so reached for the coffee pot instead.

At that moment Elsie entered the room. “Tammy I’ve spoken to Dr Hoskins, he can see you at ten if the road is open.”

Tammy instictively flexed her back, she could just feel where the bruise Elsie's eldest son had caused. She finished her breakfast a few minutes later and was debating what to do next, Angela wasn’t hungry and was pushing cereal around the bowl in front of her. Richard walked into the room and asked Tammy to follow him into the study, meanwhile Elsie went into the sitting room, accompanied by Angela.

As Tammy sat down there was a knock on the study door and Thomas entered with a tray. Tammy saw the large coffee pot and guessed this might take a while.

“Dad, what’s this all about?”

“Your mum’s on bail but has been charged with some serious offences.”

“Such as?”

“The main one is money laundering, but she might face a charge of conspiracy to import drugs.”

“Drugs?“

“Yes, the police found cocaine in the car, as well as half a million Euros.”

“Is that why Freddy absconded?”

“Probably; actually, that's an alias and he’s an Albanian. Gerald gave me his real name but I can’t remember it at the moment, not that it’s important.”

He reached for the coffee pot and poured a cup for each of them.

“Okay, so what happens next?”

“Tammy, I wish I knew. Your mother has become caught up in a very nasty situation, I hope she is simply a pawn, but I don’t know.”

“And if not?”

“Then it’s likely she’ll go to prison.”

“Oh.”

“Look, until we know a little more it’s difficult to speculate. Gerald is keeping me informed as best he can: he's talking to your mother’s solicitor.”

Tammy sipped her coffee and sat quietly for a minute, thinking.

“Dad, is there anything we can do to help her?”

“Not right now, the problem is that we can’t interfere directly, or the police will think we’re involved. I’ll have Gerald try and find out if she needs anything and we’ll sort it out through the solicitors.”

“I understand. Is there anything else?”

“There was a fax waiting for me when we got back yesterday, the bank have accepted my terms.”

“So what’s the plan?”

“That depends on you. Do you still want to continue your education here?”

“Yes, if they’ll have me back there.”

“I don’t think that will be a problem now. Elsie is having a word with the Head and a few of the governors about you returning before Christmas.”

“Really? I thought I’d have to wait for the next governors’ meeting?”

“They’ll probably want to rubber stamp the decision but I think you could spend some time back there from next week.”

“I’ll need some more clothes, suits and blouses unless they will impose a female uniform?”

“Perhaps I’ll leave that to Elsie and the new Deputy Head?”

“New Deputy Head?”

“When it looked like you’d be returning to school, the Head felt that it would be useful to have a female teacher on the staff, I don’t have a name yet but I’m told she starts next week.”

“Right. What about Angela? Oh, I need to call Jill.”

“Use the phone here.”

Tammy made her way around the large desk, carrying her recently refilled coffee cup. She called the hospital but was told that Dr Davison was working somewhere else that day. She put her head out of the door to find Elsie just as Angela screamed and ran upstairs. Elsie followed Angela and waved Tammy back into the study, now was clearly not the time to ask for phone numbers.

Richard had also heard the scream and was behind Tammy as she reversed into the room.

“Oww, that was my foot!”

“Sorry, Dad. Do you have any idea what’s going on?”

“No. We’ll find out in due course, try the phone book for Jill’s number.”

Tammy found Jill’s home number, which surprised her. She dialled and left a short message, Jill wasn't at home either.

“Dad, you said the future would depend partly on me, so what else is there?”

“Your exams are in May, that’s only six months away, but where do you want to live? Do you want to work or go to university?”

“Too many questions. I’d like to get a degree but maybe take a year out first, I think I’d also like to stay in this area, I have plenty of friends here but I know virtually no-one in London.”

“I thought you’d say that. Elsie’s happy for us to stay with her until we can get our own place, she’s also prepared to let us have some land from the estate if we want to build a house rather than buying one.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea.”

“I agree, but that’s why I said it was only six months before you finish school; it could take that long to get the designs agreed and then planning permission, let alone build it.”

“Can we have a look in the estate agents later?”

“No, I’ll phone them and ask if they can bring the information here—if they want my business, that is.”

“Right.” Tammy checked the time, “I need to be at the doctor’s in twenty-five minutes and it’s still snowing hard.”

“I’ll go and get the car warmed up, you’d better find some decent boots to put on.”

“Okay.”

Tammy ventured out into the hall before heading up to her room. She felt an icy draught as she passed Angela’s room. Pushing the door open she saw Angela sitting on the windowsill, her legs outside the window. As Tammy called out, Angela pushed herself off the ledge, falling to the ground below.

Tammy screamed for help and rushed to the window, Angela was lying motionless, face down, on the snow below. Michael was the first to reach Angela and was trying to speak to her. Tammy ran to the stairs, bumping into Elsie who had just come out of her own room. Together they descended and went to the side door, nearest to where Angela lay.

Michael was now comforting Angela, who was crying, Tammy was just grateful that she was alive. Elsie took over from Michael and quickly checked for broken bones before helping Angela to her feet and into the house. It looked like the deep snow had prevented a more serious accident.

Now inside the house, Angela was visibly shivering, Thomas brought a blanket for her. Tammy decided to keep out of the way, Angela did not need a crowd right now, Elsie however caught Tammy’s attention and mouthed “doctor” to her.

Tammy wondered if this was a reminder about her own appointment then realised what Elsie had meant, she went into the study and pulled Dr Hoskins’ number from the ‘useful phone numbers’ list pinned to the wall beside the desk. She called the doctor's surgery and spoke quickly to the receptionist about the incident, the receptionist obviously knew the house.

“I have an appointment myself in a few minutes but there’s no way I can get there under the circumstances, Mrs McPherson thinks Angela needs to be checked over.”

“I’ll speak to him, but he might suggest calling an ambulance.”

Tammy waited for a minute before getting her answer.

“Dr Hoskins is on the way to his car and will be with you shortly.”

“Thank you.”

As soon as she’d put the phone down it rang.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is that Tammy? This is Jill Davison.”

“Ah Jill, thanks for calling back. I was going to ask you about Angela and if she could see you, but we’ve had an incident, could you come here?”

“What kind of incident? I presume you mean Angela Small?”

“Yes, Angela jumped out of her bedroom window, she was really upset shortly before but I don’t know why.”

“I’m on my way.”

Tammy put the phone down, wondering what to do next. Her father then put his head around the door.

“I don’t think we should go to the surgery, we might be more useful here.”

“I agree, Dr Hoskins is on his way here, as is Jill Davison.”

“You got hold of her? Good.”

“Have you any idea why Angela would do that?”

“No, I was going to ask you the same question.”

Thomas came to the door.

“Excuse me Miss Smart, Mr Smart. Mrs McPherson requests Miss Smart’s assistance in her room.”

Thomas turned and left, Tammy just looked at her father and laughed.

“What’s funny?”

“He could have just said ‘Tammy, get to Elsie’s room now’ !”

“That’s not the way things are done, and you know it. Now get going before Elsie comes here herself.”

Tammy just missed the slap that accompanied her father’s last comment as she walked into the hallway and up the stairs, leaving her soggy slippers behind her. Angela was curled up, sobbing, on Elsie’s bed, covered by a blanket. Her face was a real mess, she was bruised from the fall.

“Tammy, did you get hold of the doctor?”

“Yes, he’s on his way. I’ve also spoken to Jill Davison, she’ll be here shortly.”

“Good thinking, thank you.”

“Do you have any idea why Angela would do this?”

“Her mum has been taken to Bletchley Accident & Emergency unit, apparently she was attacked by Angela's father.”

“Oh no.”

“Thankfully, nothing's broken apparently and it looks like she’ll be out of hospital later today.”

“When did this happen?”

“Late last night, I found out early this morning.”

“If it was that homophobe, I hope they don’t let him anywhere near me.”

“The police can’t find him. They suspect he’s heading back to Thurso——”

Tamara's Début   Part Twenty Two   by Shiraz

 
 
Thursday 11th December Continued
 

There was a stony silence, Tammy now knew why Angela had thrown herself from the window, but probably it really was just a cry for help as well as a deep concern for her mother. Angela had never really said very much about her father, but she had freely admitted that she was afraid to come out to him, what form did that fear take? Even when she'd told him on that fateful day she was not the son he expected, it wasn't the whole truth, Angela had known that it would be too much for her homophobic and transphobic father. What was unknown at the moment was what had her mother said to George Small, was it the cause of her beating?

Unsure what to do next, Tammy just stood there, looking at the sobbing girl who had now become separated from her wig. Elsie wasn't saying anything so Tammy eventually walked over to the bed, picked up a tissue and did her best to give Angela a hug. Angela muttered one word.

"Sorry."

"Angela, don't be. You need help, it's just that we didn't know - I for one haven't looked at the bigger picture."

"Tammy, please don't leave me and don't blame yourself."

"I'm staying right here."

Angela managed to pull herself up and was hugging Tammy when Dr Hoskins arrived in the room, Elsie walked in with him although Tammy hadn't seen her leave the room.

"Tammy, would you mind getting off the bed so I can examine the young lady."

Tammy did as asked and stood to one side. Dr Hoskins now examined Angela, starting with her bruised face, she winced when he touched her left cheek.

"You are very fortunate, as well as a little foolhardy perhaps. Unfortunately there's little I can do to treat a bruise, although I would suggest some paracetamol for the pain."

He lifted the blanket revealing that Angela's sweater and jeans had been removed, this at least made it easy for him to examine the rest of her, the bruising here was less severe.

"Now, have you felt dizzy at all?"

"No, Doctor."

"What about light-headed?"

"A bit."

"When?"

"Before breakfast."

"How is your appetite?"

"Awful."

The doctor reached for his thermometer and stethoscope before continuing his examination.

"Now, Miss Small, firstly you are ordered to rest for the next two days before coming to see me on Monday morning."

"But ..."

"But nothing, whatever you were going to do is now cancelled, do you understand me?"

"Yes doctor."

"Secondly, if you feel dizzy at all, call me. I hope you realise you could be in hospital right now, or worse, instead of this house. I get the impression that they care for you alot."

"Hmmmm."

"They do." This was a new voice.

"Good morning Doctor. Angela, my name is Jill Davison. I would like to talk to you for a while, privately."

"Tammy has to stay."

"If you insist." Jill had fully expected Angela's remark.

"I'm confused, who are you and why are you here?"

"Partly because Tammy asked me to be here and partly because I've had a fax from Julian Roberts concerning you. I was going to ask you to see me at the hospital but this will do just as well for an initial consultation."

Tammy decided she needed to intervene, for Angela's sake.

"Jill, would you mind if I took Angela down to her room and organised something for her to drink while she puts herself into her own bed?"

"Not at all, I had nothing planned for the rest of the morning." Tammy couldn't work out if there was any sarcasm in the shrink's voice.

Tammy helped Angela onto her feet and wrapped her in the blanket, to protect her modesty, before heading along the landing. Angela's room had warmed after the intake of cold air and her bed had been remade; a cotton nightshirt was waiting for her. With a little help, after washing her face to remove the remaining makeup, Angela finally put herself into bed - by which time a mug of hot chocolate had been delivered by Leanne. Tammy noticed the key that was normally left in one of the window locks was now missing, but said nothing.

Jill knocked on the door a minute later, Tammy let her in but stayed at the back of the room while Jill sat in the edge of the bed.

"Are you Doctor Davison?"

"I am, but you can call me Jill."

"Okay Jill, you said you were at the hospital, but I don't see a stethoscope or a white coat, are you a shrink?"

"No Angela, I'm primarily a psychologist with a sideline on psychiatry. I'm the one who put Tammy in touch with Professor Roberts."

"So what are you going to do with me? Am I heading for the nut-house?"

"Hopefully we'll just talk, if you're willing, and I have no plans to relocate you."

"I can live with that."

There was another knock on the door, Elsie put her head in the room.

"Tammy, Dr Hoskins would like to see you if you're free, he's gone downstairs."

Elsie disappeared, leaving Tammy looking between Angela and Jill and shrugging.

"Tammy, I'll be okay."

With Angela's permission Tammy left the room, finding the doctor in the study.

"Now, Miss Smart, your father has given me a copy of your letter from Professor Roberts, I must say he came to a decision very quickly."

"To me it took too long."

"Quite, anyway I see it has been supported by Dr Jacobs at The London and Dr Yates here."

"Yes, is there a problem?"

"No, I'm just still a little surprised at the speed and that I wasn't informed directly. Regardless of that, I've written an NHS prescription for two months to replace Professor Robert's private one, plus as the prescription is for the contraceptive pill you don't need to pay anything. I'll have the local NHS Trust update your records on the paper records here, such as they are now, but how long before the new central computer system catches up is anyone's guess."

"Thank you."

"By the way, you can expect invites to Well Woman Clinics and smear tests in due course."

"Okay." Tammy wasn't entirely sure what the GP had meant by his last statement but resolved not to show any confusion.

Dr Hoskins shook Tammy's hand and left, heading towards his own snow-covered Landrover. Richard intercepted Tammy as she turned from the front door and walked towards the stairs.

"I'm a little concerned, was he alright?"

"Yes, it's just that I'm not certain he's overly happy with the decision, not that he could block it."

"That's the same impression I got, leave it for now. Are you going back upstairs?"

"Yes."

"Elsie has just phoned the hospital in Bletchley, Angela's mum was released an hour ago, she's on her way to Luton airport and will be flown directly here."

"That's a bit far for the helicopter?"

"No, we've chartered a private plane to Wick then the chopper will collect her from the airport and fly here, we've also arranged to have a nurse on the flight from Luton. Given that George is on the loose we're not taking any chances."

"What about the house in Bletchley?"

"Her solicitor is handling that, but George had tried to put it up for sale."

"Oh, what do I tell Angela?"

"Tell her that her mother will be here later, but no more."

"Right."

Tammy had just reached the top of the stairs when Jill came out of the bedroom.

"She's asleep for now, can we talk downstairs?"

"Sure, coffee?"

"I thought you'd never ask!"

Somehow the staff always seemed to know when such things were needed and the hot drinks were delivered to the sitting room a minute later.

"Tammy, Angela thinks highly of you but you have really put her through the mill over the past week."

"We've been busy but I thought I was helping her."

"You have helped her but you haven't resolved Angela's issues, only she can do that. The problem is that you hadn't asked Angela what her main issues were, so when something happens neither of you is prepared."

"So I've been selfish?"

"I didn't say that, it's just that you're a great talker and a lousy listener."

"Oh, so I'm not to help any more, is that what you're saying?"

"Don't be stupid, of course you can, I just want you to slow down and let Angela develop at her own pace. Right now she needs protection and support, you can help but don't discount her own mother or Elsie either. I'll be back tomorrow to see her."

"There's some news, I almost forgot, Angela's mum should be back here this afternoon. We haven't told Angela yet."

"She can be told when she wakes. I'll see both of them tomorrow, do you have your pills organised?"

"No, Dr Hoskins has only just given me the NHS prescription."

"Give it to me, I'll collect your pills and bring them here in the morning, I'm certain you can wait one more day. I've also prepared a sick note for Angela, can you make sure it is taken to the school?"

"I'll sort that out, the school messenger was due an hour ago but he's not made it here yet. Do you know why Dr Hoskins didn't write out a sick note?"

"If he thinks Angela's injuries will be sorted out in just a few days he can't write a sick note. Unfortunately, Angela's mental injuries won't be fixed in the same timescale. I've signed her off for a week for now."

"What about the play?"

"What about it, Tammy?"

"She's the lighting technician, the only one now the main one is injured."

"Oh, I'll have to talk to Iain in case we have to cancel. Are you sure no-one else can do it?"

"Tim was the only other one, and he's gone for now."

"Quite."

"Look, Jill. I'm hoping to get back to school next week - at least for the end of year party. Do you think Angela could be there?"

"It is way too early for that young lady, congratulations by the way."

"Thanks."

Jill pulled her coat tightly around herself and headed out of the door. She hadn't been gone for more than a few minutes when the school messenger arrived.

"Excuse me, I have a delivery for Miss Smart and Mr Small."

"I'm Tammy Smart."

"Right, here you are, is Mr Small here?"

"Yes, I also have a sick note for the office."

Tammy handed it over before she noticed it was written out to Angela Small. Unfortunately the messenger was swiftly on the way back to his van. Uncertain what to do next, she settled on the 'do nothing' option, she'd already interfered enough if she accepted Jill's opinion.

She carried the bundles upstairs, depositing one in Angela's room where the injured girl was sleeping. She took her own bundle into her room and placed it on her desk. Opening her laptop Tammy plugged in her headphones and put on some music before checking her emails, something she hadn't done for days. The first was from her mother, sent on Sunday morning.

Tom,
 
I'm heading for London later today, perhaps we could meet?
 
Mum

It was a little late to worry about that message now. Tammy had been considering closing her 'Tom' email address down but had since decided to leave it until the new year, just in case.

The next mail was from her headmaster.

Miss Smart,
 
I have now received a copy of your letter from Professor Roberts.
 
This letter will be passed to the Governors for their consideration. Please note that their meeting has been brought forward to next Monday, 14th December. Subject to their decision I may be able to welcome you back to St Andrew's.
 
S. McIntosh MA, MEd
Headmaster
St Andrew's School
Thurso

Tammy wondered about how the Head had seen the letter but then remembered what her father had said, Elsie was handling the communications.

Next was one from John Hibbert

Tammy,
 
The rumour mill is running red hot!
 
It seems we are gaining a female teacher, a new deputy head no less! The governors meeting to discuss you has also been moved from the last day of term and is now on Monday, talk is that you'll be here on Tuesday.
 
There's a few idiots who don't like the idea and their parents have apparently written to the Head, he's just told them that it's a matter for the Governors, adding that there's no refunds if any of the boys are pulled from the school!
 
None of us have seen Tim Small for a week and the cottage is unoccupied right now, I walked by there yesterday. I thought Tim was working at the theatre but didn't see him, there was another Small on the list though, are they related?
 
I met Tanya in town on Saturday, we spent most of the day together but it was a bit cold for walking so we just talked over a few coffees, thanks for putting the two of us together! I've told the boys you're becoming a matchmaker as you seem to know all the girls in town.
 
See you tonight?
 
John

Tammy considered a reply but there was little she could, or was willing, to add. There was the usual few spam messages, how did they get her new email address? Reluctantly she opened the bundle of books and started work. She'd been working for an hour when she was called for lunch.

Angela had stirred a few times but was plainly suffering from exhaustion as well as stress, she was woken a couple of times by mid afternoon to drink water and once to swallow paracetamol, usually followed by the toilet.

Tammy finally called a halt to her schoolwork at four, deciding that she'd stared at books and her laptop screen long enough. Stretching, she slowly made her way to the sitting room, asking Thomas for a coffee en route.

"Hello dear, how is the work going?"

"It's slow, Elsie, I'm also a little bit behind because of the last few days. Anyway, how do you know?"

"I checked on you and Angela about an hour ago, it was too quiet in the house."

"I guess I should have realised. Where's Dad?"

"He's outside with Michael and the groundsman trying to clear a path to the helicopter landing pad, I mean the side lawn."

"How bad is it?"

"If it doesn't stop snowing soon we'll be cut off within the hour, I've been talking to Mrs Doherty just down the road, she says her husband has closed the bank and is heading home now."

"Will Joan arrive here safely?"

"Yes, if the boys can clear that path. The helicopter is on the ground waiting for her flight to land from Luton, I just need to tell the pilot the lawn is clear for them. It's a good job the wind has died down, this is the worst snow for several years."

Tammy suddenly realised where she was due to be that evening.

"The play!"

"Oh, I forgot to tell you - Iain Brown called, the press night has been cancelled, half the cast is stuck at home or at work. I told him that Angela was poorly and he said something I couldn't possibly repeat."

"Okay, it's probably just as well, hopefully we'll be able to do tomorrow's show as planned, with or without Angela."

"Did someone mention my name?"

Tammy turned and hugged Angela, Elsie stood up and did likewise. She had wrapped a gown around herself and was wearing fluffy slippers. It wasn't high fashion, but who cared?

"Sit down and make yourself comfortable, would you like some coffee?"

"No thanks Elsie, hot chocolate please. Is there any chance of some food?"

"How about a slice of cake now, dinner is in an hour. Your mum should be here by then."

"Mum?"

"Yes, she should be touching down in Wick about now, the helicopter is waiting for her."

"What will I say to her?" Angela suddenly looked afraid.

"Tell her everything, she needs to know you're alright."

"But my face, and her?" Angela broke down in tears, Elsie looked at Tammy who squatted down next to Angela's chair.

"Angela, your mum would not have been allowed out of hospital if she was in danger. As for your father, I believe Thurso, or at least our bit, is cut off. We can be fairly certain that nothing is going to happen today. One thing is clear, however, your mum needs our support."

"I've missed her!"

"I know, I know."

The truth was that Tammy hadn't realised how close Angela was to her mother, but she couldn't admit that. There was a noise in the hallway heralding the arrival of three men, one of whom disappeared immediately into the kitchen. Michael and Richard took off their hats, boots and waxed jackets, which were immediately taken by Thomas.

"Mum, can you call the pilot, we've cleared it."

"Thank you Michael, Richard."

Elsie picked up her mobile phone, speaking a few words before hanging up.

"She's on board, leaving in a few minutes. We can expect them in ten or less."

The house phone then rang, Elsie answered it then passed the phone to Tammy.

"Hello?"

"Hi Tammy, it's Cathy."

"Hi, when did you get back?"

"On Sunday while you were in London."

"When can you tell me all about the honeymoon?"

"Tomorrow, if the road's open."

"See you then."

"Bye Tammy."

"Elsie, why didn't you tell me?"

"I forget sometimes, anyway it wasn't the most important thing was it?"

"I suppose not, but you could have said."

"Cathy asked me to give her and David a few days to get straight."

"Okay."

"Tammy, who's Cathy?" Angela had recovered her composure.

"My daughter, her and David will be here for lunch tomorrow." Elsie replied.

"Good," said Tammy. "Angela, why don't you have a quick shower and put on a clean nightie?"

"If you think it's a good idea?"

"I do, get moving."

The two girls headed upstairs, Tammy intent on staying with Angela to make certain she wouldn't do anything stupid. Elsie and Richard sat, meanwhile, discussing Christmas arrangements. Angela was just out of the shower when they heard the helicopter land.

"Where's my wig?"

"Sorry, it was dirty and damp, Leanne had taken it to the laundry room to see what she could do, but I had her call Sandy for instructions, you should have it back tomorrow. There won't be any strangers here this evening so I wouldn't worry."

"If you say so."

"Angela, you don't have to accept everything I say."

"That's what Jill said, but I trust you."

"Hmmm, come on let's get downstairs."

Angela almost tumbled on the stairs as she rushed to her mother who was now stood in the hall shaking the snow off her coat and hat.

"Mum!"

"Angela dear."

The two hugged but Joan was not comfortable, her injuries were to her ribs which were badly bruised but thankfully not broken. Joan noticed the bruises on Angela's face but for now said nothing.

"Come on, I'm sure you want to freshen up after your trip. The clothes you left here last weekend have been cleaned and are in the guest room upstairs."

"Thank you Elsie, but I need to get home."

"Don't be silly, dinner's in half an hour, your house will be cold and it's the other side of the hill, I would think the road is closed, you must have seen what it's like? How about we see if you can reach your house tomorrow morning?"

"I don't want to impose myself."

"You aren't, now go and sort yourself out."

Joan reluctantly, and carefully, made her way up to the guest room she'd last used. A small suitcase had followed her from the helicopter and was taken up the stairs by Leanne. Tammy was left stood in the hallway with Elsie, Richard and Michael having disappeared.

"Tammy dear, how about you go and freshen up too?"

"If you insist?"

"I do."

Tammy arrived in the dining room fifteen minutes later, with the others trickling in behind her. Angela had made an attempt to obscure the bruising with a little foundation and concealer, but it wasn't perfect and Tammy suspected Angela knew so. Dinner was a quiet affair, neither Joan or Angela had much of an appetite but did the best they could, it seemed the kitchen knew about this when the desserts arrived, their portions were smaller than the rest.

Elsie shepherded Angela and her mother into the study as dinner ended. Tammy understood what was happening but said nothing. She followed Michael into the hallway, he appeared to be heading to his room.

"Michael, do you have a minute?"

"Yes, why?"

"Do you know what happened to your brother?"

"He pleaded not guilty and claimed provocation but the magistrate wouldn't accept it. He was given two weeks but swore at the magistrate so was given another week for contempt."

"Where is he?"

"I don't know, mum would."

"Thanks."

Michael continued on his way, Tammy decided to head upstairs herself and listen to the radio. Her mobile decided to ring, however. There was no number shown.

"Hello?"

"Is that Tom Smart?"

"Who's calling?"

"This is George Small. You will pay for what you did to my son."

The line went dead, Tammy just sat there shaking, mostly with rage. How had he got her number? Of course, he'd been a teacher so had access to the pupil records.

She walked, very deliberately, down the stairs. Her father saw the anger in her eyes and knew something was wrong. The sitting room was empty so he guided his daughter in there, closing the door.

"What's wrong Tammy?"

"Angela's father."

"What?"

"He rang me just now to blame me for Angela."

"Could you tell where he was? Were there any noises in the background?"

"No, and there was no number."

"Leave it with me. Do you know how to record calls?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Then make sure you record the next call."

"Next, Dad?"

"He'll almost certainly call you again. He probably won't have the number for here and won't know that Angela and Joan are here, not for sure anyway. Your number is his only link right now."

The sitting room door opened and Elsie walked in, followed by Angela and her mother. Both had been crying, it was fortunate Angela hadn't worn any mascara. Joan however had black streaks on her face.

"Elsie, can I have a word?"

Richard led Elsie out of the room and they exchanged a few works before Elsie headed back to the study, armed with Tammy's mobile number.

Joan was the first one to speak, "what's up Tammy?"

"Your husband just called me. He didn't say much except to blame me for Angela. I've no idea where he was, of course there's no way he could get here before tomorrow - regardless."

This set Angela back off, Joan equally showed she wasn't comfortable. The house phone rang but was answered in the study, Richard and Elsie returned a few minutes later with a joint statement.

"We've passed the new information onto the police, they're now liaising with Thames Valley Police. Joan, your solicitor called and we've given him the same information, we'll warn the school next."

"Thank you, but what if he comes here?" Joan was plainly concerned as she looked at Elsie.

"The road is blocked and I understand that the trains are terminating at Inverness at the moment. By the morning your husband's details will be known by all the police officers in the Highlands. I'll also have the gates to the estate closed in the morning and think I'll let the dogs have a run in the snow. I also reckon the gamekeeper could take a stroll with his shotgun, will that do?"

"Yes, thank you. If you don't mind, I'm going upstairs to take a painkiller and I'll turn in, I didn't get much sleep last night in hospital. Angela, could you come up with me?"

The two of them walked out of the sitting room, it was barely six thirty but Tammy was shattered and started a yawn - the early start the previous day had caught up with her. She waited until Angela and Joan had made it to the top of the stairs before she started her own move, giving the mother and daughter their own space.

Tammy used her headphones again after deciding to listen to the radio for an hour, before she eventually submitted to slumber.

Tamara's Début   Part Twenty Three   by Shiraz

 
 
Friday 12th December
 

The morning started early for Tammy when her mobile phone rang at five thirty, in reaching for the device she knocked it to the floor causing the battery to fly out. Partially awake she dragged herself into the bathroom before falling back into bed.

The next noise Tammy heard was a gentle knock on her door.

"Come in."

"Good morning Tammy, do you have any plans today?" asked Joan.

"I'm at the theatre tonight - hopefully - apart from that it's a quiet day. I'd also like to get some coursework done."

"That's good, I'd like to distract Angela with some ordinary activities, could you work together?"

"We share two subjects, maths and english, so that shouldn't be a problem. Angela doesn't have a laptop here though, I wonder if it could be collected?"

"She doesn't have one, her father forbade it. We only have an old PC, one of the school's cast-offs, in the cottage she could use to type stuff, but we had no internet access."

"Okay, but she really needs one if she's going to succeed. Do you plan to go back to the cottage today?"

"Yes, but I'm not sure how long we can keep it, the governors have a motion to dismiss George and the cottage is part of his contract."

"You know Angela is welcome here for as long as she needs, Elsie would almost certainly make the same offer to you."

"She already has, I'm just not sure of staying. Perhaps Angela needs a clean break?"

"Perhaps but she should finish her schooling. Now, I won't interfere apart from getting her a laptop, if that's alright?"

"You've already spent too much."

"I can afford it. By the way, what was your work before you came here?"

"I was a school teacher, that's how George and I met."

There was another knock at the door, Elsie put her head round.

"Ladies, breakfast in twenty minutes, we have much to discuss."

That broke up the discussion as both Tammy and Joan headed for their showers. Twenty five minutes later Tammy walked into the dining room, the last one to arrive. She sat down to a bowl of porridge, followed by a cooked breakfast. With that out of the way Elsie ushered everyone into the sitting room where extra chairs had appeared. Once all were seated, Elsie addressed the gathering.

"Right, I've spoken to Caithness Police this morning. I'm sure they were breaking some confidentiality rule but I can be quite persuasive at times."

That generated a polite laugh.

"George Small was identified in Aberdeen last night but has since disappeared again."

Tammy suddenly remembered her early morning alarm.

"Elsie, my phone rang several hours ago, it was still dark. I couldn't get to it in time."

"Thomas, could you retrieve Miss Smart's mobile phone?" Tammy hadn't seen him hovering at the back of the room.

"Certainly Ma'am."

"Now, so far as the police are concerned, Thames Valley Police have obtained a bench warrant for him from a magistrate. That warrant, unfortunately, is not valid in Scotland so the local police are seeking a similar warrant from a procurator fiscal. Mrs Small, I have taken the liberty of waking up your solicitor and suggesting you apply for a restraining order in the Scottish courts. That's been taken care of and our tame barrister will be making an application within the next twenty four hours."

"Elsie, that's very kind but perhaps I could have a say in this?"

"Sorry, Joan, but we had to move fast."

"Elsie, I can't afford it, but won't the police be able to obtain a warrant quickly?"

"There's no guarantee that the warrant can be issued before the weekend, but don't worry about the cost. We'll cover it for now and you can repay us when you receive the settlement from your husband."

"I get the feeling I shouldn't mess with you, with respect Elsie."

"Joan, I support my wider family in any way I can. Sometimes I ruffle a few feathers, but it gets the job done."

"I'm sorry I accused you."

"Don't be, even I need to be taken down a peg at times."

Outside there was the sound of dogs barking. Thomas now returned to the sitting room, Leanne followed with coffee.

"Miss Smart, your phone I believe?"

"Thank you Thomas." Tammy re-assembled the phone and switched it on to retrieve a voice mail. She switched it to loudspeaker for everyone.

"Tom Smart, your appearance this evening will be memorable. I'm sure I'll enjoy it."

Angela started to weep and was hugged by her mother. Tammy went to delete the voicemail but decided against it. After hanging up she checked the call records for a missed call, this time there was a number.

"Elsie, I have the phone number that he used."

"Richard, can you pass that one to the police?" On Elsie's instruction, Tammy handed her phone to her father who headed for the study.

"Now, onto other matters, I've spoken to the school and they are well aware of the situation. Nothing will be done concerning your husband's employment, Joan, until Monday but they are prepared to make a few concessions subject to your agreement. Can we speak later?"

"Yes, Elsie."

"Anyway, the school is still cut-off for normal traffic but they have grounds staff clearing the driveway all morning, checking the gate regularly. Their CCTV will be able to monitor the access road beyond the inner gates. Perhaps we can get you over to your cottage in a few hours when the ploughs have been through? I'm certain there's a few things you need."

"Thank you."

"Tammy, do you still want to do the performance tonight?"

"Yes."

"I do too." Angela now spoke for the first time.

"Angela dear, are you sure?"

"Yes Mum, I am. I promised I would be there, or at least Tammy did." She looked straight at Tammy and giggled. "Honestly, I don't mind, I would have said the same."

"Okay girls, I have tickets for tonight for everyone so we travel as a group, in the two Landrovers. That's this evening. We'll eat at lunchtime and just have a light tea before we leave. I believe you're needed there by six?"

"I think five-forty-five would be best."

"Thank you Tammy, I'd agree with that."

Richard returned to the room.

"I've spoken to Acting Sergeant St James, he seemed to know you, Tammy. Anyway, he's already aware and has taken the threat seriously. There will be at least one officer on duty at the theatre tonight."

"Thank you Richard, I believe that's everything for now."

That was Elsie's signal to disperse the group. Tammy took Angela's hand and mentioned the coursework. A few minutes later both girls were in Tammy's room, her laptop between them.

That's how it stayed for the next few hours, with both girls finishing more work than they had for several weeks. Exhausted they closed down Tammy's laptop just as they heard the dogs barking furiously, followed by a shotgun discharging.

The two girls scurried downstairs.

"Slow down girls, it could be nothing." Elsie mildly chastised them, Joan stood there quietly.

They waited for a few minutes until one of the groundsmen came into the house.

"Excuse me ma'am, the dogs caught a smell and went flying off towards the woods. They were heading for a stag in the trees, he'd have ripped the dogs apart so I fired a shot to warn him off."

"Thank you William."

"Ma'am."

"So, it was nothing after all. Come and sit with us for a minute, lunch won't be long."

The four of them sat and talked, fashion and the social scene being the main topics. Michael, fresh from his own endeavours outside, headed up to his room for a shower. Richard, however, braved the female orientated discussion and walked into the sitting room.

"Elsie," when he finally was allowed to get a word in, "the driveway is now clear and we have seen a snowplough on the road. I think it's fair to say that we can get into town."

As if to prove that point, Jill joined the throng in the sitting room, led by Thomas. Richard headed up to his room to freshen up.

"Have you eaten, Jill?"

"No, I came straight from the hospital."

"We're sitting down for lunch shortly, I'm certain the kitchen can include you."

"Thank you, with the play tonight I might get any decent food at all."

"Thomas, could you arrange a place for Dr Davison?"

"Certainly, Ma'am."

"Mrs Small, perhaps we could have a word in the study?"

"Elsie said you were a Doctor?"

"That's right, Tammy has been one of my patients for a while and now Angela is on my list."

"Why do you need to speak to me?"

"I think that's best said in private, don't you?"

"I understand, I think."

Jill and Joan left the room for their chat, although Joan was still unclear why they needed to talk, getting out of her chair however had reminded her of the injuries sustained two days earlier.

Tammy's father now returned and asked Tammy to follow him to the conservatory.

"What's up Dad?"

"We need to be careful this evening, George Small has met you out of costume so would likely be able to identify you. Angela might be harder for him to see but our group will be easily spotted. Therefore, don't go anywhere on your own."

"Don't worry Dad, I have the whole cast to look after me, plus a few hundred in the audience."

"I know, but I still worry."

"Don't, although I hope Jill can speak to Iain Brown to let him know the situation."

"I'll remind her, but she's probably already covered that."

"Probably!"

As they walked back into the hallway lunch was called, the two of them headed directly into the dining room, followed by the rest, with the exception of Jill and Joan. After two minutes Richard rose from the table and went to the study door.

He knocked gently, Jill opened the door after a few seconds.

"Jill, lunch is ready."

"We'll be along shortly, don't wait for us."

Richard returned to the dining room and passed the message to Elsie. The lunch was brought in and served to the collective, it was several minutes before the two women arrived. Joan had clearly been crying, nothing was said, however.

After lunch Jill asked Angela to join her in the study. Tammy was wondering whether to return to her studies when a cold breeze heralded the front door being opened. She turned around to see someone running towards her.

"Tammy!"

"Cathy!"

They hugged briefly then Tammy started her interrogation.

"Hold on, let a poor girl get out of these boots and put some comfortable shoes on."

"Green wellies, very chic."

"They're only Hunters, not YSL."

"I was kidding."

"I know, like your hair, by the way."

"Thanks, but it needs doing again. Woah, I've got to call Sandy and get an appointment."

"I have an appointment on Monday morning, I'm sure she can squeeze you in."

"I'm supposed to be going back to school on Monday."

"You're not back already?"

"No, my paperwork was only issued this week, there's a Governors' meeting on Monday that has to ratify the decision, but I'm pretty certain there won't be a problem."

Tammy stopped at that point, she hadn't told Cathy she used to be a sixth-former at St Andrews, only Elsie has known originally. Cathy guessed what Tammy was thinking and whispered in her ear.

"Tammy, don't be worried. Mum told me just before my wedding, but I'd never have guessed otherwise. Andrea sent me a text while we were on honeymoon to let me know you were recovered from your little incident."

"Thanks, but did anyone else know, I didn't want to be a laughing stock."

"No, your secret is safe, girl's honour."

"Okay! It's silly stood here, let's find your mum."

The two walked into the sitting room where Joan and Elsie were talking quietly. Tammy went to turn and walk back out but Elsie stopped her.

"Tammy, Cathy dear, please come here but close the door, will you."

"If you insist Elsie."

"I do. I think I need both of you."

Cathy obviously knew more than Tammy thought, "hello again Joan. I saw Jill's car out front, is she with Angela?"

"Yes."

"I get the feeling she's put you through the mill?"

"You could say that, I can't say it was pleasant."

"I've known Jill a long time, she says that her first sessions with anyone are always the worst, it gets easier from there, not that I've ever been a victim, sorry, patient."

"I think the real victim here is Angela."

Joan brought Cathy up-to-date regarding her husband while Tammy explained how the few days in London had gone, emphasising that Angela had come out of shell and had even enjoyed the experience. Tammy however admitted she'd pushed too hard.

"I forgot that I'd had months of practice in the shop before I went outside, I knew how to make the clothes work for me, as well as my camouflage paint." That caused a giggle.

"Angela was thrust into the wide world too soon, but she survived."

There was a noise behind Tammy as the sitting room door closed.

"Only just!"

"Angela, I'd like to introduce Cathy, Elsie's newly married daughter."

Cathy stood and walked to Angela who was a little uneasy, Cathy kissed her on the cheek before suggesting she sat. Jill, in the meantime, had already taken a seat.

Elsie was the first to question Jill, "so how is Angela?"

"She'll live."

"Come on Jill, you know what I mean."

"Sorry Elsie, I think you know why I can't say anything more."

"Yes, in that case we'll just have to tickle Angela until she gives up and tells all."

That caused the room to descend into chaos, relieved only when Tammy asked Cathy about the honeymoon. As the details of Cathy's and David's experiences unfolded Angela become increasingly embarrassed, to Tammy's amusement.

"Angela, you have to get used to girl talk, even join in."

"But ...."

"But nothing. Are you a girl now?"

All eyes turned to Angela who burst into tears, all except Jill who's eyes were fixed on Tammy.

"Tammy, study, now!"

Tammy started to stand up but Joan intervened, "Tammy, please stay where you are. Jill, you may not be prepared to say what happens in your sessions but I can, especially if it concerns me."

"That is your right, but I would suggest that it's not appropriate right now."

"I feel it is."

Jill waited almost a minute with no words said. She then stood up and walked out of the room, heading for her car. Having said her piece she didn't want to be around to be picked apart.

Joan took a deep breath and started.

"Tammy, Jill thinks you have pushed Angela so far that she could never make a decision to become a boy again, it would cripple her emotionally. She says that is wholly your fault."

"Joan, I've already said I am sorry." Tammy was finding it difficult not to cry.

"Tammy, don't. I won't accept what Jill has said and, unless she retracts her allegation, we'll find someone else who can see Angela."

Joan walked over to Tammy and gave her a hug, Angela followed her mother to similarly embrace her. The room stayed silence as Tammy dried her eyes before a weak smile returned to her face.

Joan continued, to the room, "Angela has felt for years that she was different but it wasn't until she knew Tammy, instead of Tom, that Angela finally realised who she is. I think Jill has missed the point, Tammy is a catalyst not a cause, the result was never in doubt - it was just a matter of when and how?"

Angela picked this up, "I'd like to thank everyone here for helping me get to this point. Sure I was scared, very scared, but it's a journey I needed to make, even if I didn't know it at the time. I am now certain that I won't return to school as a boy, Tim has left the building. "

Everyone stood for a group hug, before the tears took over. The phone had been ringing whilst this was going on, but was ignored by everyone bar Richard, who had retreated to the study.

"Excuse me everyone, I have some news."

Richard waited for the room to fall silent, "George has been spotted in a car near Thurso railway station but it's not known where he went from there."
 
 
Tamara's Début concludes with the next chapter.

Tamara's Début   Final - Part Twenty Four   by Shiraz

 
 
Friday 12th December Continued
 

Elsie was the first to break the silence. “Come on, we can’t worry about one wee man, we’ve got more important things to do. Tammy, what’s in that bag on the table?”

Tammy picked it up and found her name printed on a label, which was also acting as a seal. Tearing through the label to access the bag she found a three month supply of birth control tablets. She checked the instructions on one of the boxes, reading that these were the 28 day variety, “take one every morning, even during your period” it said. She held the box in her hand for a few moments before starting to cry.

Elsie seemed to have known all along what Jill had left and just smiled before going to give Tammy a hug. “Welcome to womanhood, Tammy, you’re on the pill!”

There was a knock on the door and Leanne entered: “Excuse me, Miss Small, your wig is clean and in your room.”

“Thank you, Leanne.”

Angela scooted up the stairs to fix her appearance, although no-one had yet commented about it. Tammy went to her own room so she could make an appointment with Sandy, acknowledging that her hair needed some TLC.

“Hi, Tammy, it’s Debbie.” Tammy racked her brains before realising she was Sandy’s older daughter.

“Hi, Debbie, what are you doing there?”

“Mum needed a hand today, one of the usual girls slipped on some ice and is laid up at the moment. Anyway, I take it you need to see Mum on Monday?”

“How did you know?”

“There’s nothing we don’t know, everyone talks when they’re in the chair. It’s just a shame that the hairdresser’s code prevents me from saying too much!”

“Thanks, I wonder what other secrets are out there?”

“Secrets, I shouldn’t worry about them, you don’t have any, not anymore!” The two giggled at each other down the phone line until Tammy heard Sandy tell Debbie to behave.

“Right, Tammy, let’s get this done before mum throws a hissy fit. Cathy is in at eleven so how about midday?”

“That sounds okay.”

“Do you want to see Joanne as well, she said you enjoyed the torture?”

“Do I have to?”

“Tammy, it’s a small price to pay when you want to wear sheer stockings.”

“Thanks, does she have a free slot?”

“Eleven thirty?”

“Only half an hour?”

“That’s normal for a repeat, she said you probably won’t want another Brazilian until January, unless you’re planning a winter in the sun?”

“Not that I know of, I think I have other plans right now.”

“Sorry, I forgot; you’re back at school on Tuesday.”

“How did you—never mind.”

“I’ll see you later, Mum’s approaching with a scowl on her face.”

“Bye.”

Downstairs, Elsie and Cathy had just finished an animated mother and daughter chat. Joan had sat quietly in a corner until Cathy excused herself to return home, Elsie then turned her full attention to Joan.

“Joan, I said earlier that you don’t have to worry about the cottage. The governors feel that if they are to accept female students in the sixth form then they will need female teachers on the staff.”

“But I only taught at primary level and I’m badly out of date. George insisted he wouldn’t let me work after we moved up here, he said it was up to him to support me.”

“I’m sure it won’t be a problem. We’d like to offer you the post of pastoral manager with responsibility for the welfare of the female sixth-formers. The salary is £28,000 and the contract would include the tied cottage and Angela’s fees, we would also arrange for you to attend any courses you might need. All we’d ask is that you agree to a contract before Christmas, or preferably on Monday when the governors should agree the necessary changes and authorise contracting an architect and agree in principle to the building work.”

“Building work?”

“They can now see a future for female boarders, not just day students, so intend to build a ten bed boarding unit, all en-suite, ready for September next year.”

“That’s a little different from the ancient building the boys use.”

“Yes, but the law has changed somewhat since the school was built, we have to abide by many more regulations now; that’s the official line anyway. What’s your answer?”

“I’d love to, but what about Angela?”

“Again, on Monday I believe they’ll accept Angela without waiting for all of the same paperwork that Tammy needed, although that won’t be school policy for now. Your daughter is a trailblazer.”

“Wow, but I thought Tammy had that title.”

“I suppose they’ll have to share it. Anyway, unless there's an unforeseen problem they can both return to school on Tuesday, your contract could start the same day.”

“Thank you. I’ll do it.”

“Right, by the way your manager will be the new deputy head, Yvonne Stewart, my son-in-law David’s big sister.”

“I see what you meant by looking after your family.”

“Perhaps, but she won the post on her merits not through nepotism, although a personal recommendation doesn’t hurt! She’s been teaching at a girls school in Dundee and was appointed a Deputy Head there last year.”

Meanwhile, upstairs, Tammy had put the phone down and was now looking at the little box of pills. The instructions said to take one at the same time every day, in the morning. It was now gone four, and quite dark outside, but she wanted to start the pills straight away. She poured a glass of water from a jug and tried to break open the box but it wouldn’t open easily. In the end she ripped the box open, sending the blister packs scattering across the floor. She picked up one of the packs and pushed out one of the little pink pills, holding it between two fingers.

Tammy was about to say thanks to any deity who would listen when there was a knock at the door, Angela walked in without waiting.

“Oh, you’re busy.”

“Yes.” Tammy popped the pill in her hand and washed it down with water, the magical moment lost. “What is it?”

“Do I look alright?”

“Yes, fine.”

“I’m sorry, Tammy, it’s obviously a bad time.”

Tammy stood and went to give Angela a hug, “no, I’m the one who should be sorry. These pills mean a lot to me but you mean more, I’d just forgotten. The wig looks fine, by the way. You just need to touch up your makeup.”

There was another knock on the door, this time Angela opened it.

“Excuse me, Miss Small, Dr Hoskins is waiting in the study to see you.”

“Thank you, Leanne. Sorry, Tammy, I have to go.”

Tammy just sat down and started to cry. She didn’t know why, it was way too soon for the pill to have any affect, if at all. Finally, she went to the bathroom to clean off her make-up, kicked off her shoes and laid on the bed. Within a minute she was asleep.

Downstairs Angela and the Doctor were exchanging pleasantries.

“How are you today?”

“Much better.”

“Have you been taking paracetamol?”

“To be honest, I forgot but I haven’t felt like I needed anything.”

“I see the bruising on your face has faded somewhat.”

“I’m using concealer so it won’t show so much. I don’t want to be a spectacle at the theatre tonight.”

“I thought I said you needed rest, Miss Small?”

“You did, but the theatre needs a lighting technician and I’m her, otherwise there's no show tonight.”

“Are you fit?”

“Not as much as I’d like to be, but I’ll survive.”

“I see. I didn’t write a sickness certificate for you, did I?”

“No, but Dr Davison did one yesterday. It’s valid for a week but I want to go back to school on Tuesday if that’s alright?”

“That’s apparently not up to me.”

“Sorry Doctor, I didn’t ask for the certificate. Is that all?”

“No, I’ve asked Helen Yates to see you about a full blood screening and I’ve had a request from Professor Julian Roberts asking me to make a formal NHS referral to him, he included that he hoped to see you in early week of January. Drop by the surgery next week so my nurse can take some blood.”

“It sounds like you're not entirely happy with this?”

“I feel like I’m being undermined, but I suspect that’s not your causing. Anyway, if you feel dizzy at all, give me a call. If you feel worse than that, call an ambulance, but I think you know all that. Good day.”

The doctor left, leaving Angela standing in the study doorway, unsure what had just happened. Richard was the closest and went straight over.

“What’s up, Angela?”

“I get the feeling Dr Hoskins doesn’t like me,” she went on to repeat her conversation with the Doctor.

“Angela, it’s not personal, Dr Hoskins is a senior doctor who just doesn’t like the way that medical personnel can talk to each other about his patients without going through him. He used to like to know every one of his patients and all of their problems, whether medical or otherwise. Now anyone can bypass him if the reason is good enough.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, now get along to the sitting room for a sandwich before we head into town. Do you know where Tammy is?”

“She was in her room ten minutes ago.”

Richard climbed the stairs to freshen himself before knocking gently, then entering Tammy’s room.

He first saw his daughter comatose on the bed, fully dressed, then the glass over water next to the remains of the box of tablets, blister packs littering the floor. He rushed over, fearing the worst, to find only a single pill missing from one pack. The print next to the missing pill said ‘Fri’.

He crossed to the bed and gave Tammy a nudge. Her eyes blinked a few times before opening fully. Richard now noticed how her mascara had run, making black trails down her cheeks.

“Dad, I’m sorry.”

“What for?”

“I’m getting wound up too easily, I’m going to hurt someone if it continues.”

“Do you want to see Jill?”

“No, definitely not today, I just need to get it out of my system.”

“How about you do that on the stage this evening?”

“Perhaps?”

“There’s no ‘perhaps’ about it, young lady. Get in that bathroom and fix your face, you need to have something to eat before we leave.”

“Yes, Dad.”

Richard left her bedroom and walked down to the sitting room, satisfied he’d sorted out his daughter. A minute later, he was talking to Elsie when there was the sound of glass shattering coming from upstairs. They rushed up the stairs to find Tammy coming out of her room.

“What happened?” The two adults asked simultaneously.

“Sorry, I accidentally kicked the table and the water jug fell. I was just on my way to find something to sweep up the glass.”

“We’ll arrange that, come down with us to have some tea, I think you need to wind down a little?”

“No argument there.”

Tammy followed them into the sitting room as Leanne headed up the stairs, dustpan and brush in hand.

“Dad, what do you think will happen?” Tammy was not talking about the play.

“I wish I knew but you won’t be alone, the same goes for you, Angela.”

“Thanks, but I’m still not sure. He could do anything.”

“He could, but the police know he’s in town and will have officers looking for him. He’ll make a colossal mistake if he comes to the theatre this evening.”

“I realise that, it’s just that we keep getting glimpses of him, so to speak, then he vanishes.”

“Tammy, don’t forget he lived in Thurso for seven years. He has friends who won’t know what’s been going on, or have even been fed lies.”

“I s’pose so. It’s just so frustrating.”

“Don’t dwell on it, how about you read through the script after you finish that sandwich?”

Tammy wandered back to her room, which was now tidy and clean, evidence of the broken jug had been removed. She sat in the armchair and began to read. It only seemed like five minutes when there was a knock at the door, Tammy was too immersed in the story to not the passage of time.

Richard walked in and smiled at his relaxed daughter.

“Come on, give yourself a wash then join us downstairs, it’s time to go.”

She cleaned her face, removing all her makeup, Joanne would have had to do that anyway. She made certain, however, that she had sufficient supplies in her bag for after the performance. She was downstairs in about ten minutes, Richard noted that this was a new record for her.

“Come on, coats, hats, boots! Let’s be careful out there!”

The two Land Rovers were parked outside the door. The gamekeeper was driving Elsie’s vehicle, Michael was not confident on the ice. Richard took the wheel of his own, although he wouldn't be driving back.

The ride down to the town was mostly in silence. It had been dark for over two hours. The temperature, which had barely registered zero degrees Celsius during the daytime had now dropped to five below. Thankfully the roads were clear but the two drivers needed all the concentration they could muster. They reached the theatre car park without incident, but it was now just gone six.

"Angela dear?"

"Yes Mum."

"Your sister sent me a message, good luck she said."

"Suzie?"

"Well, how many sisters do you think you have?"

Angela and Tammy hurried in through the stage door and directly to the lighting console or dressing room, as appropriate.

Angela settled down and checked her notes. She then ran through a test, making certain none of the stage lights had blown, before relaxing and setting the auditorium lighting.

Tammy dropped into a chair after changing out of her own clothes and putting on a gown. The back of the chair now bore her name, a sheet of paper was held by some strips of sticky tape. It looked amateurish but made her feel important.

“Hiya, girl.”

“Hi, Tanya.”

“Are you ready for this?”

“If I’m not, I’m in the wrong place.”

“That’s the spirit!”

Joanne now approached the two. “Come on, clean your faces for me.”

“I have,” replied the indignant Tammy.

“You need to moisturise before I put this stuff on,” she pointed at the pots in front of them, “and use these wipes first. Let's do it properly now so I don’t want to have to completely reapply your makeup during the interval.”

Tammy did as asked before Joanne returned to her a few minutes later.

“I’m glad you decided to visit me in my torture chamber on Monday, you’ll have the boys lusting after you on Tuesday.”

“Joanne, two small problems, make that three. Number one is that I don’t know what I like, I mean whether boys or girls. To be honest it might be girls; why am I telling you this?” Tammy went deep crimson.

“Because I care, because we all care, and you need to work this out for yourself soon.”

Tanya joined in, “so what’s the other two?”

“They knew me as a boy.”

“How many actually knew you well?”

“Not many, I suppose, I didn’t associate myself with the rest of the sixth form much outside of lessons.”

“So is that going to be a problem?”

“I wish I knew, it would take only one student to ruin it for me, after all it only took one teacher.”

“Tammy, John told me that he’s organised the first fifteen rugby squad as your personal protection team.”

“You’re kidding me!”

“Yes I am, and you almost fell for it. Anyway, he’s told them that you’ll be sorting out girlfriends for all of the naive spotty ones. Seeing as they will already be very frightened of girls after years in that prison, I mean school, they’ll run a mile and leave you alone. He’s also made a few veiled threats through the prefects to the rest of the school.”

“What, he’s told them?”

“No, calm down. He’s said there’s a couple of girls joining the sixth form and they’d better show respect, especially as you’ll be a prefect yourself.”

“Now you truly are kidding me.”

“No, that’s gospel. You’ll be told on Tuesday just before assembly, when the rest of the school will be told of the new arrangements. Anyway, what’s excuse number three?”

“Girls, that’s enough. I have a job to do.” Joanne was quite insistent.

Tammy wondered just how much John Hibbert had told his girlfriend but was lost in thought about the play while her torturess fiddled and faddled with brushes and other implements.

Suddenly there was a loud screech outside, followed by a bang. Tammy and Tanya jumped in their seats wondering what to do. Tammy wondered if this was the start of a bad evening but wardrobe needed them so they were shuffled off to see Sarah.

Outside, Harry Davison was trying to explain to a young police officer how he’d lost control of his car on the ice, hitting the high wall at the far end of the overspill parking area, much of the wall was now nestling around his BMW.

“Could you blow into this, Sir?”

Inside, Richard, Elsie and the rest of the McPherson household were in the small theatre bar, sipping their drinks, Richard included. It had been agreed that another member of staff would drive Richard’s Land Rover for the return journey and both vehicles were now parked a few hundred yards away.

Harry Davison burst into the bar, quite red in the face, shouting into his mobile phone. He quietened as every head turned towards him—particularly his daughter’s, who had arrived just behind him.

“Yes I know it’s Friday night! I want it in the garage and ready tomorrow!”

There was a pause, “how the hell would I know that? Look, just come and get it!”

“Bloody garages. Bloody police. Bloody weather.”

“Dad, calm down.”

“Okay, okay, a large Oban should help. No ice, I’ve had enough of that.”

The barman seemed to know what Harry had wanted before the order was given and the glass arrived, accompanied by a jug of highland water. Harry poured a little of the water into the single malt before sipping it.

“That’s better.”

The bar was starting to fill when Andrea and Alison arrived, just ahead of Cathy and David.

“Hello girls, glad you could make it, you too David.” Elsie took command of the welcomes. Richard went and kissed the three girls gently. Joan was hesitant but the girls seemed to sense this and approached to her.

“Joan, I’m glad you could make it.”

“Sorry, I don’t know you?”

“Silly me, I’m Andrea, Elsie's niece. You have a lovely daughter, where is she?”

“In there, playing with the lights.” Joan gestured towards the auditorium.

“We’ll see her later, no doubt. This is my sister Alison, you know Cathy, don’t you, and of course David."

The bar was starting to fill up. The performance, the first of five, was sold out. Mind you, so were the other four. No tickets had been sold for the cancelled performance the previous day, as it was for the press and local dignitaries who preferred not to pay for their tickets, many of whom now couldn't obtain tickets for the main performances.

Thankfully most of the audience either hadn’t yet arrived, it was still not quite seven fifteen, or they had already gone to find their seats. One of the problems at the theatre was the lack of a ramped entrance into the foyer, meaning disabled ticket holders often had to be admitted through a fire exit,

The small box office, next to the bar, was fielding enquiries about spare seats and returns. The three returned tickets that the theatre knew about had been taken up by those on the reserve list, cold callers and drop-ins didn’t stand a chance.

Elsie, Joan and Richard were starting to relax and enjoy the evening.

The programme, which was on sale in the foyer, had photos of all the cast, but not in character, including a short biography of each of the leading actors. Tammy’s was short—she’d not given much away.

“Tamara Smart is a new addition to the Mill Theatre Company having previously only acted in school productions. She hopes to be available for our next production in April, exams permitting.”

Richard picked up six copies, one would go into an archive he was building, the rest were for those present.

At ten to eight an announcement requested the audience to take their seats. Richard and Elsie held back in the bar, finishing their drinks, while the others went into the auditorium. They were putting their empty glasses on the bar when the five minute warning was heard.

All at once raised voices could be heard coming from the direction of the box office.

“I’m sorry, Sir, but as I said, we have a full house—there are no tickets available for tonight’s production.”

There was a scream, a second scream and a grunt were then heard from the foyer. This was followed by a thud. Richard told Elsie to stay where she was then carefully pushed the double auditorium doors open far enough to see what was happening.

Next to the box office, a man — perhaps in his late twenties — lay face down with his feet pointing towards where Richard stood. Kneeling over the prostrate man was PC St James — dressed for the theatre. The incapacitated man was obviously unhappy about being on the floor but every attempt to speak, or swear, ended up as a grunt while the officer restrained him.

Across the foyer a chef’s knife was lying on the floor, the blade was about ten inches long, pointed, and it looked dangerously sharp, the edge was glistening in the bright lighting. As Richard surveyed the scene two more police officers, this time in uniform, came in from the car park. The first handed PC St James an evidence bag and a pair of gloves, while the second escorted a distraught theatre volunteer into the bar, pushing past Richard who retreated temporarily. Once the PC returned to the foyer, Tammy’s father returned to his viewing position, forcing the doors a little wider this time.

Stuart St James said nothing although he plainly knew that he was being observed. He gave the two uniformed officers space, getting up from his restraining position, so they could pick up the prone man who was clearly intent on escaping. As he was slowly brought to his feet he started swearing loudly in a heavy brogue. He then swung his head towards Richard and went silent for a second, rage in his eyes. Richard was now able to identify the man as John McPherson, Elsie’s eldest son.

The knife was still only six feet away at this point, and although John’s hands were firmly locked behind his back there was still a risk he’d attempt to retrieve it.

“Mr McPherson, I suggest you go quietly with these officers, it will only hurt you otherwise.”

The former school employee was starting to thrash, despite PC St James’ warning, but stopped long enough to glare at Tammy’s father. He opened his mouth to say his piece but was yanked backwards on his heels, silencing him.

“Officer, what just happened?”

The plain clothes PC bent down to pick up the weapon and placed it in the bag. He sealed the bag before answering. “Mr Smart, I presume? I’m afraid it’s a little too soon for me to comment but you may be able to make an educated guess. We’ll have to interview Mr McPherson when he’s calmed down so we can discover his reasons.”

“I thought he was locked up?”

“So did I, I’ll find out why not when I get back to the station.”

“Are you not staying for the performance?”

“I don’t have a ticket for tonight, I just wanted to blend in with the rest of the audience. I’ll be here for the last performance on Sunday.”

“So will I. See you then.”

“Goodbye, Mr Smart.” The PC left the building holding the bagged knife

Elsie had heard Richard’s conversation and was now stood in the doorway, beside him. An usher came up behind her, plainly unaware of the recent event.

“Madam, Sir, please take your seats.”

Certain they could no nothing to help, both walked into the darkened auditorium, past many rows of seats. They had just sat, in the second row, as the house lights dimmed and the curtain rose.

The lights shone bright as Bernado and Riff, played by John Hibbert, walked on stage to start the play. A few minutes later Tanya and Tammy made their appearances as Maria and Anita. Their accents were perfect as Maria complained to Anita about her lack of a boyfriend. Both were wearing stage wigs and looked nothing like their normal selves under the heavy greasepaint.

Tammy, at the start of full rehearsals had initially been hesitant about her on-stage relationship with the Bernado character but knew that she had to fully immerse herself in Anita, regardless of how she had to respond to the other characters, especially Bernado.

By the time she was singing ‘America’ Tammy had long forgotten any first night nerves and was enjoying herself. Tanya had caught her eye during the song and winked, they would pull this off!

The interval was taken so the scene in the bridal shop could be prepared, Tammy and Maria headed back to their named seats where a bottle of chilled water awaited. Outside the theatre it was sub-zero, in metric terms, but inside it was hot—almost unbearable—especially under the stage lighting. Joanne came back to the two stars to tidied their make-up.

“Girls, I was watching from the wings—you’re fantastic. I can see you’re enjoying yourselves.”

“Joanne, what was that crash we heard?” Tammy suddenly became tense as she remembered earlier.

“Oh, some older guy crashed his car into a wall. Jim, the theatre manager, said the police breathalysed the driver, but he couldn’t work out who it was. He was letting a wheelchair in through the fire exit at the time. They can’t use the main entrance, but apparently the theatre has funding to do some building work in the Spring — you know, a new bar, foyer and disabled access, that sort of thing.”

Tammy relaxed, “thanks.”

Back in the bar it was crowded, the talk was the production and the cast. No-one except Elsie and Richard seemed to be aware of what had happened and there was little point in alarming everyone. What concerned Richard, however, was that the police had left the building.

The five minute call came too soon and before long the two girls were under the lights, standing on the set at the start of the second half.

Tanya, as Maria, began her ditzy solo, telling everyone just how pretty she was, Tammy, as Anita, watching. The play continued into the murder scenes; this was the end of Riff. The assault on Anita soon followed, although Iain Brown, the Director, had insisted this had to be symbolic.

The end of West Side Story came several minutes later. As the curtain fell, the audience erupted — almost everyone were on their feet.

Iain Brown, the director, appeared on stage to continued applause. One by one the cast came round the curtain to line up in front of the footlights. The applause continued and flowers were thrown on stage for Tammy and Tanya.

As Tanya bent down to pick up one bouquet, a wheelchair user suddenly jumped from his chair and rushed forward. He grabbed the girl and pulled her from the stage.

“I told you I’d get you, you pansy!”

Tammy could only look down as George Small moved to hit the dazed Tanya, however several men launched themselves at George and pulled him away before he could strike the girl. The place was in uproar but one man was in control.

Iain Brown jumped from the stage and restrained George.

“George Small, you are under arrest for common assault. You do not have to say anything but it may harm your defence if you do not mention, when questioned, something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence. Do you understand?”

Richard looked slightly confused but Stuart St James solved that problem when he arrived, slightly out of breath.

“Sorry, Sir, just back from booking a prisoner in.”

“Apology accepted, Constable, can you ’cuff this man?”

“Of course, Chief Inspector.”

Elsie was tending to Tanya when Sandy arrived from several rows back.

“My god, what did he do?”

“We think he was going for Tammy.”

“It’s that George, isn’t it. The guy’s stark raving mad. Tanya dear, can you sit up?”

Tammy had come down from the stage and helped Tanya sit up.

“I’m sorry Tanya, I’m sorry Sandy, I'm sure he was trying to get at me.”

“Tammy, don’t beat yourself up. I might have fallen a little awkwardly, but I’m fine, just a wee bit winded.”

“Are you sure?”

“Tammy, I’m sure. I’ve been doing taekwondo for a year, mum thought it might be good for keeping me fit. The first thing you learn is how to fall, I was able to roll enough to stop me getting hurt.”

Tanya stood and gave Tammy a hug.

“Hey, Tammy, how’s that for a stage début?”

“Memorable.”

Iain was back on the stage and was handed a microphone. The theatre settled down.

“Ladies and Gentlemen. I’m afraid that one of the cast has been assaulted but the perpetrator has been arrested and is on his way to a cell.”

There was a gasp from those members of the audience who still weren't aware what had happened.

“If the entire cast could rejoin me on the stage?”

Tammy and Tanya climbed up the steps to the side of the stage and rejoined the rest of the cast. John Hibbert was looking very concerned, he’d wanted to intervene to protect his girlfriend but the adults had arrived there first.

“Could we have a big round of applause for the entire cast of West Side Story?”

The noise in the theatre was thunderous, this continued as each member of the cast was introduced, leaving the four main characters until last.

“And, finally, in her début for the Mill Theatre, let me introduce the fabulous Tamara Smart.”

The applause continued as the cast left the stage, Angela finally raised the house lights, the sign that the audience should head for home. The audience could now see George Small being led away in handcuffs.

It was gone ten but Tammy was finally back in the dressing room having her stage makeup removed before re-dressing in her street clothes. She applied a little of her own makeup — just for presentation — before crossing the auditorium to meet her father in the bar.

“Dad, that was supposed to be me on the floor!”

“Tammy, it might have been, but it seems that Tanya is none the worst for her experience, fortunately.”

“I thought the theatre was being watched?”

“It was, but the police had to deal with another, earlier, problem.”

Richard wondered if he should say anything more but decided that it was safer to say nothing, especially as Tanya had now arrived from backstage, and was hugging her mother. Both girls were soon swamped by the remaining members of the audience — some even wanting them to sign their programmes.

Eventually Elsie decided they ought to head back to the house. She made a quick call on her phone then gathered her clan. As they went out into the frozen air, two warm Landrovers pulled up outside the theatre entrance. Within seconds they were all aboard and moving. Snow was falling again but the wind, thankfully, had died down as they wound their way away from the theatre after a memorable evening.
 
Fin.
 
 
To be continued in Tamara's First Christmas

 

Smart Family & household
Tammy/Tamara/Tom Smart	Principal character / 'Anita' in West Side Story
Richard Smart	Tammy's father
Tara Smart née Simpson	Tammy's mother
Small Family
Tim/Angela Small	Schoolfriend of Tom/Tammy
Joan Small	Tim/Angela's mother
George Small	Tim's father & School Teacher
Suzie Small	Tim/Angela's sister (in England)
McPherson Family & Household
Elsie McPherson	Head of family / School Governor
Cathy Stewart née McPherson	Elsie's daughter
David Stewart	Cathy's husband, brother of Yvonne
John McPherson	Elsie's eldest son / School Catering Manager
Michael McPherson	Elsie's youngest son
Alison & Andrea McPherson 'A&A'	Elsie's Nieces / Nurses at The London Hospital
Thomas	Butler
Leanne/Anna	Chambermaids
Jonathon	Gamekeeper
William	Groundstaff
School Characters
John Hibbert	Sixth form student 'Riff' in West Side Story
James Hunter	Sixth form student
Dr Steven McIntosh	Headteacher / Brother of Elsie McPherson
Anne McIntosh	Wife of Headteacher
Mrs (Janet) Adams	School secretary
Harry Davison	School Governor / Father of Dr Jill Davison
Rev Franklin	School Anglican Chaplin
Mr Mike Thompson	Deputy Head
Yvonne Stewart	Deputy Head
Mr Wright	English Literature tutor
Mr Carmichael	Business Studies tutor
Theatre Characters
Sandy Franklin	Musical Director Town library manager
Iain Brown	Theatre Director Senior Police Officer
Thurso Characters
Sarah Bonney	Boutique owner
Emily Bonney	Student in Dundee, daughter of Sarah Bonney
Sandy Smith	Hair stylist
Tanya Smith	Sandy's daughter / 'Maria' in West Side Story
Debbie Smith	Sandy's daughter
David Smith	Sandy's son
Joanne	Beautician/Torturess
Frances Ernesto	Hotel/Bar manager
Mr (George) Doherty	Bank Manager
Mrs Janet Doherty	Wife of George Doherty
Jeremy & Robert	Bank assistants
Julie	Cathy's friend
Sharon Pike	Editor, Thurso Echo newspaper
James Dougall	Thief
PC Stuart St James	Police & Truancy Officer
DC Ben Franklin	CID Officer Husband of Sandy Franklin
PCs Andrew & Neale Fraser	Police Officers, DJs and Shinty Team members
Medical Characters
Dr Jill Davison	Psychologist
Dr Hoskins	McPherson Family Doctor
Professor Julian Roberts	Glasgow Royal Infirmary Gender Identity Clinic
Dr Helen Yates	Endocrinologist
Dr Hughes	Police Medical Examiner
Other
Wendy Roberts	Wife of Prof. Roberts
Jeremiah Smith	Solicitor, Smith, Smith & Smith, Edinburgh
Gerald Watson	Solicitor, London
Tanya	Richard Smart's PA (London)
Sally Yates	Airline passenger/Psychiatric nurse
James Yates	Husband of Sally & brother of Helen Yates
Becky Yates	Daughter of Sally & James
Alfredo (Freddy) Giovanni aka Alban Berisha	Friend of Tara Smart & lousy driver

A fuller character index is available, and covers characters present in all the books up to (at present) Tammy:It's Complicated