X-Why-Me…Chapter 1
Chapter 1
“Seriously…”
“I mean seriously…”
Emily looked at herself in the mirror and turned this way then that way trying for the best vantage point to see herself as well…hot.
“Why me? What did I ever do to you?” She appealed up at the ceiling. “Angie has bigger boobs and a better figure than me and she’s like thirteen!”
Angie of course was Emily’s baby sister a whole two years younger and even at that age Angie could pass for sixteen or seventeen.
Emily looked thirteen.
Five four, perky A-Cups and one hundred and one pounds.
She frowned the stared into the mirror some more.
“Augh!”
Disgusted at her lack of progress she headed out of the bathroom to her bedroom and started grabbing her things to get ready for school. It was the one saving grace about this she supposed. Her sister couldn’t wear her clothes.
Not that their tastes matched.
Angie was a sugary lacey girl and while Emily sort of liked those tings too it was just too…just too much to take. She was the older sister and Angie made her feel inferior as a girl…better body, better hair, better eyes….
Oh Emily looked definitely nice, slender waist, nice hips but she just wasn’t putting weight on where she wanted…her binge attempt to gain weight last year had gave her a “Muffin Top.” It took a lot of time jogging and doing crunches to get rid of it.
And she took after her dad’s side of the family…Irish…she and brown hair but with a lot of red in it and she was pale…one might call it creamy or fair skinned but Emily called it bacon skin as she tended to fry instead of tan. And oh yes green eyes…can’t forget the green eyes. Angie was fair and blonde and blue eyed like their mom was.
Only her mom wasn’t a complete bitch about things.
She hated that Angie just ever so coyly and cutely lorded her attributes over her.
She hated being behind all her classmates. Most of them were changing, blossoming from the whole teen girl stages of puberty into heading towards being women. Emily just felt like she was getting left in the dust.
She debated the nicer bra and panties but actually went with her usual Hanes and cargo pants and a tee-shirt. She tended to go with girly logo styled tees because with not a lot up top the stuff on the shirt sort of said she was as much as a girl as the rest of them.
She was still trying to find some kind of image, something that fit her.
She headed upstairs from her bedroom in the basement…a plan her step dad had come up with because Angie was so smug it was leading to fights. Like most younger sisters more mature body or not she was always going into Emily’s room when she was upstairs.
The basement was a nice fit for her increasingly darkening moods too. Not hormones…no…but the lack of it…
She went to the fridge and took out some eggs as her mom was folding clothes. “Morning honey did you want me to make you something?”
“No…I’m good Mom.”
“Oh…still nothing?”
“No…”
“It’s okay honey we all mature at different rates.”
“Mom…I’m not blind…It’s your time, and even Angie is having her period…I’m two years older than her! I think that there’s something wrong with me.!”
She cracked her eggs adding salt and pepper into a bowl then some hot sauce and beat them with a vengeance.
“Your sister is an early bloomer Emily, you just have to be patient.”
Emily took some baby spinach from the fridge and put it into the frying pan. “Mom, I’m not stupid…thirteen’s pretty normal for her to start getting her period. Me on the other hand it’s like I’m stuck here.”
She gestured with her hands at her body.
“So you have a dancers build.”
“Great only I can’t dance.”
“You could get lessons, you’re good at sports.”
That was partially true like in school he was really decent at the sports they played but the teams all had these really pretty way more filled out girls than she was….
So she did what a lot of girls did…less than she could…if you can’t stand out in a good way then don’t stick out in a bad way. Really it was the same with her marks. No one likes a brain, and guys really don’t like a smart girl…well one smarter than them.
So she hid.
She bit her lip from tearing up and added her eggs to the spinach then some cheese. Her dad, well stepfather came in and sat down rubbing his face before standing back up and leaning over the table to kiss her mom.
Jake was okay, better than okay when her dad had left them it had really broke her mom’s heart and she remembered the fighting but not what the fights were about. She remembered how hard things had gotten because her mom had been the mom and housewife and she didn’t have a whole lot of job skills. Her dad being a deadbeat and not sending child support checks or alimony had sort of soured her with men a little. Losing the house and moving into a trailer park was a kick to her life ad her ego too.
The kids at school…well some of them loved that. Not because they hated her but kids love to just have someone to pick on. But then again it sort of cemented her status as not one of the socially accepted.
Not long after that her mom met Jake, and Jake had money, well sort of. He had a small airfield that was his families and between running that and the water bomber they had he made pretty good money.
And he wasn’t her dad.
She liked that about him and hated that about him for the longest time. It was only recently with the last couple of years they made peace.
No he wasn’t Angie’s dad either. That guy was a married man that had strung her mom along with promises and then when her mom was pregnant he ditched her and that’s when Emily’s father had found out.
Yeah her mom had an affair, and it likely broke their marriage the rest of the way. But he just left them, and it wasn’t just the lack of support it was that he never wrote, or called or sent presents. And while Emily had no illusions that her mom cheating was wrong…if her birthfather was like this. Then what was he really like as a husband when he was there?
She was old enough to know life wasn’t easy or clean.
So Jake got some slack, slowly going from Jake to…
“Dad, you want some of this?”
“Mmm…sure, looks awfully healthy though.”
“It has cheese, just ignore the calcium and think about the grease.”
She cut the omelet in fours because she wasn’t going to be one of those people that wouldn’t make breakfast or offer a share of what she made to everyone in the house.
Toast with some of the Jams in the house and coffee.
Angie came literally bouncing in from her jog and grabbed her share as a sandwich and ran upstairs without so much as a thank you. Emily glared at her leaving then just sighed…if she hadn’t all they would’ve heard on the bus ride into town would be. How much of a bitch she was because she didn’t make her some too.
She made herself a coffee a perk that she had over her sister, one her parents likely made up but no coffee until grade ten. Angie hated the fact that she wasn’t allowed coffee. And Jake/Dad banned Red Bull and energy drinks in the house or out of it. He hated them and thought that you should be eighteen or older to buy them.
He kind of had a point. She’d seen a girl that she didn’t really know once drinking a tall can of Red Bull while being pregnant. She didn’t want to think how effed up that kid would be.
She ate her breakfast and loaded the dishwasher and got her things ready and left to go wait for the bus.
Angie was almost late as usual but there enough to get onto the bus and catwalk her way to her seat with her friends.
Emily took her seat and put in her ear buds for her I-phone and listened to music into school.
School was okay, she didn’t really hate it but she wasn’t Angie who though she was two grades below her they went to the same school. There were different sections where they took classes between middle school and the older kids but that never seemed to matter in the mornings as Angie descended from the bus in all her bouncing preppy glory and was intercepted by her crowd of whatever Disney factory whatever was popular at the time.
Clones…sheeple.
Emily always thought the fact the most famous thing that researchers had cloned was Dolly the sheep.
Someone had a sense of humor in that lab.
She spied Jack sitting at his usual spot and he smiled when he saw her. There’s another point she had over Angie. Jack, her boyfriend. She’d been going out with him since the summer when they met when se was swimming with a few of the girls she knew while picking strawberries.
Jack was there with some of his friends picking corn on the other side of the river and both groups had the same idea of cooling off.
They both had some stuff in common but more than that he seemed to like her like her.
“Hey.” he smiled and passed her a Starbucks.
“Hey…thanks you treat me good.”
“You like coffee, you’re easy to please.”
They talked about going out and doing stuff that weekend before the bell rang and the day started.
The rest of the day was good until just before lunch when she was asked to go to the office. Her Mom was there.
“Hey? Is everything okay?”
“Yes I was just in town and I tried to get you on your phone but I couldn’t.”
“Cell-phone blocker in the school now mom. Too many people on them instead of class.”
“Oh, about time actually.”
Emily rolled her eyes. “So…..why are you here then?”
“Oh…I got you an appointment this afternoon with my Ogyn.”
“Oh…lovely.”
“Emily we really should have been to see her before this but you haven’t blossomed yet so I thought in wasn’t a problem but you’ve been getting more and more upset about it so…”
“Mom! Jeez not here it’s no one’s business.”
“Okay, okay I’ll pick you up after classes.”
“Okay…”
Her mom had left and before long it was still all over the school. Most if the guys tuned it out after all this was lady parts eeewy business and stuff they’d rather not think about. But the girls…
Yeah…well we all know how teenaged girls can be right? Emily sought out refuge in Jack’s arms and his hands and she let him get a hand under her top as they made out quite a bit. She hadn’t put out even though he was getting more and more ready for it more than she was…it was something that scared her, the thought of sex yes but she also was excited and horny too like any teenager would be.
But Emily dreaded the naked part.
Jake had had other girlfriends and they were all more filled out than she was.
So, he got some heavy boob action even if they were smaller than the ones the other girls had. Emily had really been thinking about going all the way. Jack had waited this long and had taken her out of dates even two really nice ones.
But the news was out…Emily had something wrong with her…I mean that goes without saying right like look at her. Then the speculation started, all those things that might be wrong with her in subtle looks and hushed whispers and just out and out conversations in the girls bathrooms.
“I hear she’s bone dry down there.”
“Maybe it’s a freaky shape inside.”
“I heard she’s never had her period yet.”
“What!”
“Yeah that’s what I heard too.”
“But she’s almost sixteen?”
“But she looks like she’s twelve.”
“……Giggle, giggle, whisper, giggle, snort of laughter.”
It really pissed her off. Emily stalked almost out of the bathroom stall and stared at them, glared at them.
“Fucking Republicans.”
Of course that went right over their heads but the tone hadn’t. And the fact she said something smart assed that they didn’t get. The cat glares of hate popped out and she could almost feel the daggers being mentally throw her way.
The bell had rung and she was kissing Jack when Catherine Edwards bounce swayed by and she gave her a look and gave Jack this look that was like he was something she scraped off her pumps.
“Eew fuck…you might as well be a pedophile.”
Emily felt like she had the wing knocked out of her and rage soon followed that. “How fucking dare you… you balloon titted…”
She stopped because people had laughed at what Catherine had said and Jack looked like he was…well he looked like someone punched him too and he was staring at her….
“Jack…”
“I…I’ve gotta get to class Emily…”
And he took off pretty fast.
Faster than she could go after him… - and the monitor in the halls seen her and glared at her in warning to go to class.
She made it to the bathroom before her nerves brought up the cob salad she had earlier.
The sort of remembered the guidance councilor getting her to the school nurse and taking some Gravol and water.
Her mom came to get her early.
Which resulted in a long crying session in the car…them some serious chocolate therapy on the way to the Obgyn.
Her Mom went in with her.
They took blood which stung but wasn’t a problem. She wasn’t squeamish like that but she was all nerves getting naked and into the paper gown.
She was a little freaked by the doctor giving her, her first breast exam. She wasn’t used to any female hands touching her than her own.
Then the pelvic.
It was scary and cold and…
Then she was asking.
“You’ve never had a period.”
“Uhm no.”
“Urination’s normal, a normal stream no spraying, leakage.”
“No, I’m kind good like that…I don’t really spritz unless I reeeealy have to go and stuff happens.”
“Stuff like?”
“Laughing hard, sneezing, hard coughs…like regular.”
“Do you feel this?”
“Yes.”
“And this, and this…and this?”
“Uhm Yeah…”
She took some swabs then even took her to this machine with the gel and made her drink a ton of water.
Emily was getting worried.
Especially when the Dr. was talking to her mom just past the curtain….she snuck closer to listen in…it was about her she had to know.
“I think, and I’m very certain that Emily is CAIS.”
“What’s that?” Her mom asked sounding really worried.
“I won’t know without more tests but Emily from the exam I just did isn’t built the way she should be…not at all really…she’s doesn’t seem to have been born with the right organs and the ones she has are…sort of an adaptation to the way her body deals with her hormonal issues.”
“What issues, what the heck are you trying to say.”
Emily was sort of scared but being a teen of this generation she was only half listening and the other half she was Googling CAIS on her smartphone.
“No!…No, no, no….!”
X-Why-Me…Chapter 2
Chapter 2
She had fainted and was slowly woken up with her mother shaking her gently. “Emily? Emily wake up you fainted.”
“I did?”
“Yes, you did.”
“I had the worst dream Mom.”
“It wasn’t a dream.” Her mother had this strange almost foreboding finality there in her voice.
“Mom?”
“You eavesdropped on me and the doctor and then you looked what we were talking about on Google.”
“But it’s not true right?”
“We haven’t got the DNA tests back those will take awhile but everything else says yes.”
“But it’s still not true, c’mon!”
“It is, look you’re just going to have to deal with it.” And her mother just…she just walked out of the exam room. “Get dressed Emily we’re going home.”
“Mom…?”
There wasn’t a response.
Emily wiped at her eyes and she might have shed a tear or too getting her clothes back on but she seemed to be kind of not able to cry it out like she might have she sort of felt like she might have already.
What was going on? Why was her mother acting this way to her? Was she suddenly not her daughter anymore? Her mind was racing going almost to one nasty thought to another why her mother might have been just acting like this to her. She almost shyly left the doctors office because this was their gynos office and all of a sudden she sort of felt like everyone was sort of looking at her like she was fake.
She was still shaken deep down as she went outside and got into the car where her mother was waiting and she didn’t say anything instead she just sort of bit her lips and chewed on her cheeks as her mother drove out of the clinic’s parking lot a lot faster than she normally did and was very, very quiet the whole drive home. Actually her mother never made a single stop or said a single word.
She got out of the cars and said. “You and your sister are on your own for supper tonight.” Then she closed the car door pretty hard and walked fast down the lane and to the hangars.
Emily got out of the car and went downstairs to her room and when she had closed the doors and fell hard on her bed was when she started to cry.
It was several hours later when she came too from crying herself to sleep and her eyes were crusty and she made her way slowly upstairs and her stepfather was there actually it looked like he was the only one there with most of the lights off in the house and she looked around.
“Where’s Mom?”
“In our room she’s passed out.”
“Passed out?”
“She’s not taking the whole thing so well and she ended up having a few drinks.”
“Okay…but mom’s never passed out drinking before.”
“Well…she was kind of getting worked up a bit too much Em so I kind of took over mixing her drinks and with it being vodka…”
“You gave her enough to get her hammered.”
“Yeah, she was…really freaked out.”
“I’m freaked out too.”
“You should be this is about you and not her but as much as I love your mother and your sister there are times when they really are cut from the same cloth. Sometimes your mom’s still the same person she was in high school.”
“You knew mom in school?”
“She’s like your sister everyone knew your mom back then.”
“And you?”
“Not so much, I was the geeky kid that was into computers and radios and tornadoes and strange stuff. The only reason I wasn’t placed into the completely ignored pile was the airstrip and well we had planes so that sort of made me kind of cool.”
“Oh…so you two didn’t back then.”
“Hell no, I went to school and your mom married your Dad until that went to crap and then she hooked up with a bunch of people after that and then she got in deep with your sisters dad.”
“Yeah not the greatest track record with guys.”
“That’s part of what we’re trying to keep your sister out of.”
“Huh?”
“You mom was one of the best looking girls in town but the thing is she knew it and she thought that it solved everything. Well that’s not what life is like outside of school.”
Emily looked at him and he was having a few beers but he wasn’t a drinker drinker just a wind down drink once in a while or like right now when he was cooking. Her stepdad didn’t cook a whole lot tending to leave that to her mom but he did sometimes like now. He was making home made pizza and he was cooking while drinking and talking. Emily took a seat at the kitchen table and she started to take the block of Gouda and started to grate it.
Yes Gouda he made this really good but different pizza with tons of ground beef flavoured with green peppers and onions and caraway that had a white sauce instead of tomato sauce that was something called beshem-something but with some horseradish in it. The smoky Gouda went really well with this and everyone liked the pizza too even the edge was good with egg wash and rosemary and caraway and celery salt and black pepper.
He looked at her and set down a PBR for her to drink. Yes he let her drink, once in awhile and usually never more than one or two beers at most. She liked that but wondered at the fact she liked beer at all wash genetic or something. She cracked it open and savoured the sort of being treated like she had enough on the ball to have a drink seeing as they were having a real adult conversation.
“So do you know why mom was so freaked out about this? I know why I am but…”
“Yes. I do and she doesn’t know that I know.”
“Will you tell me?”
“I’m still deciding.”
“On…”
“On the fact that you’re fifteen and while you might not be using your hormones normally you’re still pretty full of teenageryness so I’m trying to weigh if telling you something that you might or might not take well after everything else you’ve been through today is a good idea or not.”
“But…”
He just looked at her and shrugged. Yeah as much as she hated it he was immune to the pleading and begging and needling of her, her mom and her sister.
“Dad, you do know that just saying that sort of thing just makes me want to know all the more right?”
Then he made most of the whole freaky day better by nodding and coming over and kissing her forehead.
“I know but you’re a girl you can’t help it.”
And she could tell that he meant the “Girl.” Part even if he never emphasized it…maybe that was the good part. He said it just like he always would have.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 3
Chapter 3
Emily went to bed quiet and pretty despondent. Everything she’d know had just been tossed into chaos. She tried to get to sleep but every time she did her mind kept going over the stuff that had happened.
XY…
XY…
Genetic male.
But she wasn’t a boy, dammit she wasn’t!
Tears came and she’d sleep to bad dreams nightmares of getting hairy, of her small chest fading to real flatness, of her growing this disgusting flopping hanging thing between her legs.
Of standing in front of the class in a skirt and it flopping out of her panties and people pointing and staring.
Or having a boner and the same thing happening.
XY…
XY…
Two little letters ruining her life.
It took a huge effort to get up out of bed and to shower and get ready. God she had this almost perverse urge to raid her sister’s closet and go to school as frilly and as girly as possible.
Instead she just wore her usual style of clothes….comfy capris, sneakers and a cute t-shirt she had wished she’d fill out better…she even debated putting on make-up but she wasn’t really much of a make up kind of girl.
Depressingly she thought. ~Now I know why. ~
She’d always been a Tomboy; she was always small but kind of athletic she sighed and got her book bag and she trudged upstairs. She went for her usual coffee and her mother was up looking hung-over and she stared at her. They stared at each other.
“That’s what you’re wearing?”
“Uhm…yes?”
“Go change, wear a dress or a skirt…no more sneakers either that’s…that’s just…”
“Mom…”
“Go! Dammit I’m not having you parade around like some transsexual freak, you’re my daughter it’s about time you dress and act like it!”
Emily ran to her room crying…she passed her sister in the living room hall and she was smirking…
~Oh Christ she knows!~
She slammed her door shut and locked her door and slid down it crying…why? Why was her mom being so cruel to her? Didn’t she know that this hurt her as much as it did her…that she wanted to be that girl her sister was?
Well aside from being a bitchy little social climber.
Her mother came downstairs and began to hammer on the door ten minutes later.
Emily opened the door…blouse…that made her feel even flatter than she was which is why she never wore it and a skirt with Mary Janes. “Better…go on and get to the bus stop, here’s a twenty get breakfast at school.”
She took the bill and put it in her book bag and she left the house without a word. Her stepdad must be working.
Her make-up wasn’t that good she was sure of it and it felt like a weight on her face…she felt open and vulnerable and really hurt.
XY…
XY…
Did her mother hate her?
She looked at her sister who was actually made up really well and filled out her clothes…she was wearing jeans…and she filled them out with that perfect boy magnet heart shaped firm ass and her curvy hips offset by her bare midriff.
She gave Emily this look and a small little smile that was almost dismissive…like she was laughing at her without making a sound and Emily could almost hear her saying. ~Go ahead look, stare, want…you’ll never, ever be like me. ~
She even seemed to flow onto the bus when it pulled up and she went to her friends in the popular crowd.
But it started there…then…every seat she passed the kid in it said… “Dude…”
And it was the same thing at school.
They knew, they all knew…people she thought were her friends avoided her or called her “Dude.” Too.
Or “Pervert.”
Or “Freak.”
She got stares from the faculty.
Condoms in her locker.
Spat on by some of the holy roller kids.
There wasn’t even any LGBT help; it was like she had contracted leprosy.
The she ran into Jack who she hadn’t seen all day at the end of lunch and he was bruised and had a bloody lip.
“Jack? Oh my god what happened?”
He glared at her then yelled at her. “You! You fucking well happened! You lied to me, lied to all of us and this is how you fucking….aaah treat people?!”
She tried to touch him. “Jack I didn’t know, I’m still the same…………ooww!!!”
He punched her in the face…
She’d never been hit before in her life….it hit sooo hard…and fast…she heart something make this crackling sound…and there was so much blood! She was gagging on it as it poured down her throat and tears blinded her.
He hit her…
XY…
XY…
~He punched a guy didn’t he?~
Emily couldn’t stop crying…even when jack kicked her in between her legs screaming at Emily. “I’m not a faggot!”
She kept on crying….bawling…
She heard some guys close by laughing.
“Fag-fight!”
“Yeah!”
“Jack be nimble, Jack be quick Jack sure loves to suck the dick!”
Jack screamed and kicked her twice more…
She heard him leaving…screaming chasing someone, someone touching her…her sister…? It smelled like Angie’s perfume.
She freaked out and tried to swat her away…screaming…just screaming slapping and kicking and trying to defend herself.
Angie kept trying to hold her sister….that point driven home by the sounds she was making…the hurt, crying wail that only comes from a woman’s heart.
“Some one call 911!”
X-Why-Me…Chapter 4
Chapter 4
Emily woke with Angie’s arms around her? She was being held and shaken and her face hurt…she tasted blood.
She flailed wildly for a few minutes before she realized she was still in her bedroom and then did a wild scramble for the bedside garbage can and started to “Hamlet.” into it.
To “Hamlet” was a local thing that came off of a teenaged drunk from someone a few grades higher that stuck in the school. Due to the “Yorrick” sound.
Angie was sniffling and rubbing her back, she might have even held her hair if Emily’s hair hadn’t been so short. As it was the compassion was kind of surprising really her and Angie had seldom been getting along since Angie had her growth spurt and they had seemed to have switched ages.
“What…why…what… (Cough)… (Sniffle)…OW!!!”
“You were having a nightmare, and thrashing and stuff and when I went to wake you up you flung yourself out of bed Em…ya kinda did a face plant…”
“Oh fuck…I think I broke my nose.”
“Yeah looks like. It’ll match my black eye.”
“Black eye?”
“Yeah you socked me one.”
“Sorry…” Emily hunched.
“Yeah…Okay what gives Em you usually don’t flip out.”
“Mom never told you?”
“Uhm…no…but what’s the deal there too Dad said that mom got tanked?”
“You know I had to go and see our doctor right?”
“Yeah ‘cause you’re like not getting your sludge days.”
“Eeew…Angie…”
“Well what happened?”
Emily looked at her sister. Oh she had popped her a good one and the eye was really good and puffy. This was the first time they’d been this close in a long time. She really wasn’t sure that she could trust her with this…they’d been just so at odds and stuff lately and the dream…nightmare was still really fresh in her mind.
But she was her sister.
And their mom was out of it, and she really, really just needed someone. And that had her getting teary again.
“Hey, hey, hey…it’s okay…” Angie schooched over to her and hugged her.
“Why…(Sniffle.)…Why are you being so nice to me…(Sniffle.)?”
“Em…you’re my sister I don’t like you all the time an I don’t get you but I do love you.”
(Sniffle.) “You do?”
“Yeah I do’s” Angie said it like she used to talk when she was little and they were closer.
“Okay…(Sniffle.)…The doctor checked me over and stuff and they said I’ve got CAIS…”
“Huh?”
“I’ve got an X and a Y chromosome stuff.”
“Huh?”
“I’m a genetic boy…but I’ve got this thing where I don’t do the male hormone things so I developed in mom like I was a girl.”
“Whoa…so that’s why mom was freaked?”
“Yeah she was really off…I’m scared.”
“But you’re a girl?”
“Not technically…”
“Oh Bullshit Emily, I’ve seen you in the buff enough that you’re no dude.”
“Yeah but that’s the whole hormone thingy.”
“Uh-huh and the fact that you’ve got a boyfriend.”
“Had…Jack dumped me.”
“Good.”
“Good?”
“You deserved better than him anyways.”
Emily stared at her sister. She wasn’t expecting the support. “People are going to freak out.”
“Don’t tell them, I won’t.”
“You won’t?”
“Oh not about something like this, Jesus and My Little Pony Emily why the hell would I do that?”
“I thought that…”
“Don’t be a bitch Emily, I wouldn’t do that to you no more than I’d out a transgendered person.”
“A what?”
Angie sighed. “Transgendered y’know someone that’s the opposite sex in the wrong gendered body.”
“Like on Maury?”
Angie gave her a look. “That’s just way wrong on so many levels, that douche and others like him just effing exploit trans-people.”
“You know a lot about this stuff…why?”
“I had a t-girl in my cabin at camp last summer, and out of all of them she was actually one of the most awesome girls there…way, way better than some of the other bitches.”
“Oh, so you’re not going to…”
“Hell no.”
“Good…thanks sis.”
“Hey don’t thank me I’m so telling everyone that you’re such a klutz and a spazz that you whacked me in the face then took a flying face plant off the bed and busted your nose.”
“Gee thanks.”
Angie actually beamed at her. “No problem! C’mon let’s go find dad and see to your snoz.”
Emily let her sister help her to her feet and they went upstairs where their dad was up and making coffee with that bleary just woken up look and t-shirt and boxers on.
“We woke you up?”
“Yeah but it’s cool, this stuff comes with the job. Here em sit in the chair while I take a look at it.”
(Sniffle.) “Okay…”
“Well that’s a good sign, you sniffled and didn’t scream.”
“I did though.”
“But you’re not now.”
“Here…let me take a look.” That came from her mom in the doorway of the kitchen. She looked bad but sober, maybe hung over. Her eyes were very red though and it looked like it was from crying a lot.
“Mom?” Emily said quietly.
Her mother sighed and went over and hugged her. “I’m sorry honey…I lost it there and hearing that just brought up stuff.”
“Oh…” She didn’t get it and she looked over to Angie and Angie gave her this I don’t know either look. She looked back to her mother. “It’s okay…”
Her mother went to check Emily’s face. “No it’s not. I let my stuff get in the way of being your mother when life yanked the rug out from under you. I should have been there right from the get go. I’m sorry honey.” She kissed her on the forehead and smiled at her. “It’s not broken but you’ll have black eyes and a lot of red from it.”
Emily watched as her mom when to the fridge and filled two zip-lock baggies with ice and passed one to each of the girls. “Here this’ll help with the swelling.”
Her mom made herself a coffee and sat and rested her head in her hands on the table. Her dad started getting things out and looked at the girls. “I know it’s early but who’s for pancakes?”
“Okay!” Both girls said at the same time. He made the best pancakes and getting them was a treat that usually only came around when they had time for them he started to mix things together and their mother groaned when he turned the mixer on.
Emily smiled when he leaned over her mom’s shoulder and asked her. “Hung-over?”
Her mom just sort of nodded into her hands.
“Good.” He winked at the girls though when he said that.
Maybe this wasn’t going to be the end of the world after all. But she still…what was it about this that set her off like that?
X-Why-Me…Chapter 5
Chapter 5
*Two months later…
Emily sat in front of her computer trying to ignore the maddening itching ache in her breasts.
She’d hated being small and skinny and flat and she had never had a period…never would according to her doctors. Yes plural, since the whole thing with her being a CAIS XY person came out in her family she’d been to several specialists and even had her DNA tested for some disorder where she’d need kickstarter hormones.
It turned out she didn’t. The tests for the things they were looking for turned out positive for CAIS but not the other stuff. It was a bit baffling and disheartening for her especially as time had passed and she’d learned about CAIS women…shapely, lovely…not her.
Other than the obvious things she was healthy. Her vagina turned out to be shallow but not too bad at just over four inches deep on the shallow side of average and a bit narrower but according to her gynecologist not a big deal…ha..ha…lol…not.
Angie had tried to cheer her up with. “Hey to you every guy’s got a big one, enjoy it!”
A little off the mark but she actually was trying. She and her sister still had little in common save their share secret and She wasn’t going to tell anyone, neither of them were.
Her little sister was still very “Girly” and “Popular.” and Emily was well…she was still herself but a lot inside had changed. Jack being an ass and breaking it off with her because she was too much a “little kid” had hurt. This whole XY thing had thrown her and shook her up and she was still sort of trying to get a grip emotionally.
She second guessed herself a lot. CAIS girls were supposed to be pretty girly, and lovely, from the internet stuff she’d read but she wasn’t like them. But it seemed like puberty of some kind was starting to settle in and her doctor said that it might be the case too because she was XY she might be having her growth spurt more along the times that teen boys had tended to start theirs.
She knew she ached a lot lately and her boobs were driving her crazy…itches or no itches there’s only so much slimy creams she was able to stand applying to her skin. It was like some of those soaps with the moisturizers in them, she didn’t like those because she didn’t really feel clean afterwards.
Emily flipped through the pages of the online yearbook from when her mom was back in high school. They were doing okay now and her Step dad/Dad was probably the most to credit for that she was certain but she was also certain that she needed to know more about her family history, even the medical stuff especially about her birth father. Her mom didn’t really keep anything with him in it around the house. Whatever had happened was bad…bad enough to cut him out of their lives forever.
But even here in a book that should have stuff about him there wasn’t much like he was one of those kids that avoided the whole picture thing. Her mom was all over the place in them but her birth father she just got partial shots and there was one semi okay shot but it was a team picture.
She was looking because he wasn’t really clear in her own memories, when he’d been with her mom she’d been really little. The only thing she vaguely remembered was the fights and them yelling at each other.
But the team picture for the hockey team did show her a few things. He played goalie, they looked a lot alike so there wasn’t a whole lot of doubt who her bio-dad was and he was short.
Like five five in the graduating year short.
“Yeah…so that’s why I’m not all long legged XY beauty pageant stuff…Wow he’s short…”
She looked at stuff for the hockey team and he was good by what she knew about hockey…they went to state three times and won once…he had a great goals stopped record or she thought it was good. It got him a scholarship to Michigan State.
But he was a ghost, even on Google there was nothing except the hockey stuff….it was like he dropped off the planet.
He might even be dead…except she couldn’t find an obituary listing that fit him.
Emily got herself a bottle of juice from the mini-fridge she saved from the side of the road last week while passing some apartments in town that were used by the community college. She was with her Dad and it had been a cool sort of moment…apparently he had supplied his first place like this and was proud of her for keeping the tradition.
Angie was first very eww then a bit jealous as Emily has bought a used microwave and a toaster from the local good will from her allowance and had been making her bedroom more like her own apartment since it was in the basement.
Her dad was all for it because it was good practice for her own independence. It was just one of the changes she’d been making lately.
Letting her hair grow out.
Hitting the books harder, rearranging her room and turfing a lot of the old posters and stuff from when she was a tweenager, she was just getting started really even if she was still kind of lost….
The XY played on her head a lot.
She liked boys but she was getting these almost second guesses about her sexuality…she watched some of the girls some of the time and while she was pretty sure she wasn’t attracted to them it also was maybe like her tastes were changing…she could admit when she thought another girl was beautiful.
And some asian men/boys…were just…and while not a moody Emo-kid or a goth she found some of them hot too.
Unless they had those earring plug things…guy, girl those things were just gross.
She looked at her clock…she still had some time.
She logged onto Facebook under her real account she had two one was her public one and the other was her exploring one a phony one that she could be weird if she wanted. But she wanted to be herself as she went through the list of people on her dad’s team when she could find them on there and was contacting them asking if they knew anything about her dad…if they could tell her where he was, because she had some health issues and needed to talk to him.
That was her weekend pretty much and between that and homework and chores. She only gotten a few replies and they didn’t really know that much.
So she was checking again before getting ready for school.
Clive Reiner: 1 message.
She clicked on the message.
[Hello Emily, I went to Michigan State with Kevin. I don’t know where he might be but he has family in Seattle that he was close too so you might find some clues there. You father was a decent guy but a bit high strung and hot headed sometimes. I’m not sure if it’s a good idea to fill you in on this but you sound like Kevin left a big hole in your life and need some answers. Kevin left Fort Smith and went to college and after a few weeks he had gotten into a pretty hard partying crowd in school and then after Christmas break he had broken it off with your mother. All I know was you were coming along three months after the break-up and from what I remember you father dropped out of school to be with you and your mother at the time. I was under the impression that your mother had believed she’d be moving out of Fort Smith and in with him.]
She frowned at the screen and typed a thank you reply. It answered a few questions but not at the same time.
She loved her mother but she also had heard enough that she might have laid on the pregnancy pressure to keep him with her. Her mother was a local beauty but she wasn’t a good student…and god knows she’d screwed up stuff since that too.
She got ready for school and dressed extra warm as it was getting into December and she still was sort of very on the skinny side.
Long socks, her Uggs (Boots) jeans and a light soft tee-shirt under her zip-front school hoody and her newest fashion choice…a boys sized urban cammo jacket. She wasn’t sure why she liked it so much but she did.
Another XY mystery.
She went upstairs and walked with her sister down the driveway to the bus stop and waited a bit before looking over and watching Angie putting on hr make-up. She wore it at school a lot different than when she left the house.
“Found some stuff on my birth-dad.”
“Really like?” Angie gave her an honestly questioning look. Her father wasn’t a mystery to them, just an asshole that wanted nothing to do with Angie or really any of them.
“He was a goalie on the high school hockey team and good enough o get a scholarship to Michigan State.”
“Okay…and?”
“He left Mom here.”
“Well he was going to college.”
“She got preggers with me after x-mas break his first year.”
“Oh…”
“Yeah, he broke up with her then too.”
“So Mom…”
“Yeah maybe, he came back and gave it a go.”
“Oh…mom…jeezus. I’d never do that to a guy.”
“Yeah the guy said dad was off the rails partying in his first year too.”
“Well he was a jock and a first year isn’t that what you do half the time?”
Emily shrugged. “Maybe, the whole thing just kind of sucks to know.”
“Sorry?”
“It’s okay, I know why I’m so short and skinny though.”
“Oh?”
“Dad…he was like short, skinny too.”
“And he played hockey?”
“Goalie….I imagine he was fast.”
“Would that help?”
“Likely.”
“Going to try out?”
“Hell no, I suck at skating.”
“Yeah what about field hockey?”
“We don’t have a team.”
“Yeah, so…”
She shrugged again. “I dunno, the guy said dad might be over in Oregon that I might have family there. It’s a start of a lead.”
“So why are you even bothering Em he ditched?”
“I want to know, I want to know my family history and if there might have been any girls like me on his side of the family plus there’s other medical history in the family stuff I want to know about.”
“Like?”
“Cancer, heart disease…that stuff it runs in families.”
“That’s like important?”
“Yeah you too, what if that stuff runs in your family?”
“Shit yeah but I’d need a lawyer to find out.”
“You could always ask his wife.”
“No…I’m not gonna be that kid, the one that busts up a family.”
“Yeah…he’s a douche and so’s mine but I wouldn’t want to be the one that wrecks a happy family.”
“What if you find your dad and he’s got a family.”
“I’ll just try to talk to him like person to person…we’ve got Jake. I don’t want anything from him except information.”
The bus pulled up and they got on going their more peaceful but separate ways and Emily was lost in though until the bus stopped someplace new.
Well it wasn’t new it was the Sawyer farm but they hadn’t ever stopped there before. There was this girl there getting on the bus.
Tall, long, long legs in tightly faded jeans and curvy hips, small waist and a nice white blouse with a guys thin blue tie? It settled just nicely between her very prominent breasts…she had a cream colored knit sweater like coat with a hood that went down to her mid thigh and looked very stylish and expensive…nice jewelry…wearing a Vivienne Westwood ring…expensive and she was really beautiful…oval face, blonde but Nordic blonde with that pale hair and it was long and straight and shining.
The bus quieted down and they were all checking out the new girl. She had an old backpack over her shoulder with all these sew on patches that were flags and she had these beat up old white sneakers on…they oddly went with the tie look…
The new girl walked on looking for a seat and swayed just…
There was this knot in Emily’s stomach she’d never known before…and she couldn’t take her eyes off her…
She realized she was staring maybe more than anyone else and the girl stopped in front of her. “Can I sit with you? There’s no other seats.”
There was but some of the popular girls were already getting ready for war and had moved their books and packs to block the new girl from sitting with them. Tie…great looks…nice things but ratty sneakers…*Yeah…* she thought as she nodded and made room. *Heaven forbid she be interesting and not one of the sheeple*
“Sure…Hi…I’m Emily.”
She extended her hand and the other girl smiled a really nice smile, Emily hoped her hand wasn’t sweating…
“Kira.”
Oh that kind of fit and yet so wouldn’t go over with the crowd of popular sheeple girls at school. Too exotic in the land of boring….and of Brandi’s, Barbi’s, Ashley’s and Tiffany’s…
Proof of the I or E fad sound here her and her sister.
“You just move here?”
“Yeah two weeks ago.”
“Oh, never seen you around.”
“We’re renovating and stuff we just sort of got things where it’ll be us doing the rest in our spare time.”
“Makes sense, where are you from.”
“Los Angeles.”
“Wow, that’ll stir the pot here.”
“Yeah…I know but we had to move here.”
“Why?”
“The place was my dad’s grandparents place and we weren’t doing so well when the market crashed.”
“Oh, you look like you’re uhm…well off…?”
“For Wyoming? Yeah sure but for L.A.? things really got bad. Dad never said how bad but well were living here now because it’s free.”
“He find work here?”
“Him and mom are buying a restaurant in town.”
“Really, where?”
“The Cloverleaf?”
“Oh the old diner, downtown.”
“Yeah it needs a lot of work too.”
“Hey you guys need any help I’d be glad to lend a hand.”
“Thanks, I think we’ll need it.”
“Hey no problem welcome to Fort Smith, it’s not quite the middle of nowhere but the middle of nowhere took a shit here.”
Kira laughed and it was a good laugh too not a giggle but just a good laugh…it was also enough to get kids to turn around and stare at her. She leaned over to Emily and asked. “Okay so who’s who and why will they hate me.”
Emily swore that she was that close cheek to cheek almost that she could not just smell her perfume but Kira’s make up as well…hear her pulse hammering, or was that her own?
She licked her lips her mouth suddenly dry as she started to tell her about the people on the bus.
XY-Me…Chapter 6
Chapter 6
“Ohmigawd…lookit her boobs.”
“Gotta be fake.”
“Look at the clothes she’s wearing.”
“Heard she’s from LA.”
“Betcha she’s a bitch.”
“She looks like a whore.”
“You think she knows anyone like famous?”
Emily shook her head as she was getting things from her locker she had dished the dirt on some of the kids on the bus about who was who and what the were like with her to try and give Kira a bit of a leg up or head start when it came to the other kids in school.
Okay the girls.
The boys had the response of any guy seeing a tall, blonde bombshell with huge full breasts. They might say a few things but their hearts weren’t in it because they were already drooling.
And fantasizing.
And Emily wasn’t sure she wasn’t either.
As they had gotten off of the bus she was right behind Kira and had even walked her to the office so she could get all of her paperwork done and finished for her classes and she hadn’t been able to take her eyes off her that much.
Even now she watched her through the glassed in walls that made the school office up talking to the secretaries and the other people there and occasionally moving her hair aside revealing that really amazing model like face she had.
Kira was just kind of she didn’t know magnetic?
Emily had to make herself go and head to her classes but the rest of the day was like that and she must have replayed Kira getting onto the bus a dozen times in her head. She was having a crush make? On another girl? But was it another girl if she was XY? Was there something buried in her that was waking up?
She sort of tried to explore those thoughts again or at least a little bit as she was in gym class and she watched some of her female classmates. She was getting to where she could admit that some of them were attractive but being attracted…that was proving a different story.
She stared at some of the boys too still trying to get things right in her brain and while her trust of guys had been slammed a bit by jack and him not wanting to be with her because she seemed too much like a little kid to him or rather some of the others that had said stuff. There was a few of the guys that she did find cute.
Corey Wilson on the basketball team…tall and decently built, she had to admit she might have a thing for tall guys. He was seeing Anna Thompson but he was a friendly guy just the same and the few times she’d been around him made her sort of feel small in a good way.
Like she was even more girly and effeminate just by contrast. Then there was Nick Long who was another transplanted student but he had been here for like three years and even back then as young as he was he had come to town from Philadelphia and he had real tattoos at like thirteen and was one of the bad boys in school. Nick was actually pretty hot and good for a fantasy or two but he was a bit of an ass and a man-whore he hung around with the smoker-girls and the sluttier ones and he was known for sleeping around.
There were a few others but she didn’t get that twinge like she got with boys with the other girls in her classes.
She was still just in the dark as to why she was so into Kira like this, maybe it was the fact that Kira didn’t seen to care that much about how people were treating her. That kind of independence was actually pretty attractive.
She tried to enjoy gym class like she usually did but her breasts were still giving her that maddening itch and they were aching…heck everything was aching lately and she wasn’t used to it and she was sure that she might actually have to buy her first sports bra because she was sure that she was feeling some bounce in her breasts and it hurt.
She took two Midol from her purse and made it through to lunchtime.
Emily saw Kira when she came into the cafeteria sitting alone at the moment and getting eyed. Kira was beautiful and exotic and from Los angels it’d only be a matter of time before she would get approached by one clique or another as soon as they made their judgements about her she was too much of a temptation for the various flocks of sheep not to try to assimilate her and make her into one of theirs.
The cheerleaders were already giving her the serious looks and had their heads together.
Kira saw her and gestured her over. Emily went over a bit shy with her lunch and sat down. “So you’re surviving your first day?”
“So far but I’m definitely getting this feeling like I’m some prized cow up on the auction block.”
“That’s because you are.”
“Why?”
“Uhm let’s see, tall, blonde, beautiful and from LA they want to scoop you up to add to the cool factor of their little groups or size you up in case the have to destroy you.”
“Destroy me why? What’d I do I just got here.”
“Uhm hello…tall, blonde and likely already in the top five for hottest girls in the school.”
“What? No there’s beautiful girls all over this place.”
“Uhm…yeah not like you or some of the ones that really shine.”
“Emily I’m not that good looking.”
“Yes you are and you know it.”
“Yeah okay but it’s not natural beauty.”
“Really?”
“No I’ve had work done.”
“Really? I mean they’re already saying stuff like that but wow.”
“Can I ask why?”
Kira shrugged and Emily really couldn’t help but stare at the pleasant effect. “I had some medical issues and well I did the typical Californian upper middle class deal with the nose job and dental and stuff.”
“Boobjob stuff?”
“No actually it runs in the family on both sides I was actually starting to sprout when I was turning twelve.”
“Whoa, lucky.”
Kira shrugged again. “Maybe, ask me again in fifteen years.”
“Mine are finally kicking in.” She couldn’t help but to rub them a little just thinking about them made them itch.
“I can tell, that drove me nuts too and sore I think mine ached for the entire two years I was growing into my current size.”
“Well I had kind of medical stuff going on too plus apparently my birth dad was like a small guy and lucky me I got the genes passed along to me.”
“Hey, don’t knock small girls like yourself Em, pixies are cute.” She smiled and started taking out her lunch out of her backpack.
Emily blushed a little. “Cute, yeah I get cute a lot though.”
Kira stopped and looked at her. “Okay…I can see how cute can be a bad thing but I was kind of trying to be diplomatic and stuff.”
“Diplomatic? Why were you going to say something bad?”
“Well that’d depend on how you’d take it?”
“Take what?”
“Me saying that pixie girls are actually kind of hot.”
“Oh…” Emily blushed pretty red this time and Kira just smiled this incredibly sexy almost mischievous smile with those full lips and took out this container packed with ice and there was another container in it keeping really cold. Kira opened it up and the thing had those rolls of Sushi like she had seen on television. “Sushi?”
“I like Sushi.” There was that smile again and Emily had to take a minute before it clicked in what Kira was hinting at maybe with saying that with that kind of a smile on her face. She blushed again and whispered.
“Are you gay?”
“Sort of, sort of not. It’s more like I’m pansexual.”
“Huh, what’s that?”
“I like the person and not what’s between their legs or determined by their genetics.”
WTF!!!? Did she know!?
“Uhm…what?”
“You heard me, and I think you get what I said Emily.”
“Y..Yeah but…”
Kira took out a set of chopsticks out of her bag and opened the paper wrapper and snapped them apart. “So are you reconsidering me and you being friends?”
“No! Why would you say that?”
“You seem a little freaked out, like I just gave you the wiggins.”
“Wiggins? I’m not sure I understand…”
“Sorry it’s a Buffyism.”
“Buffyism like a cheerleader thing?”
“No Buffy the vampire slayer, it’s a cult following TV show.”
“Oh…I’ve never seen it.”
“Really?”
“Nope, too busy with school and stuff and it’s like pretty old right?”
“Yeah sort of but it’s a classic show.”
“Sorry.”
Kira shrugged again which was still just…Emily was pretty sure that she liked it. She also had the thoughts wandering in her brain that maybe because she had small breasts she might be attracted to girls with really big ones? She was pretty sure that if she was attracted to a girl that she might just be attracted to Kira.
People were watching Kira eat.
“You’re creating another stir.”
“I noticed why?”
“You’re eating Sushi, at school for lunch.”
“And…like I said I like sushi.”
“You’re in Wyoming Kira, we don’t do sushi here.”
“Well I do sushi.”
“And you’re standing out for it.”
“Oh well, I’m kinda screwed that way anyways so I’m just going to be me.”
“Well on the plus side I think that it’s high end cutting edge cool enough that you’re getting cool points for it and the haters are going to say of course she’s eating raw fish hippy food she’s from LA.”
“Ooooh, I’m so thrilled I’m getting cool points.” She rolled her eyes and took out a thermos and a white take out coffee cup and poured hot water into it and took out a packet of green powder and poured it in and stirred. It smelled as strange as the sushi did.
“What’s that?”
“Macha.”
“What’s macha?”
“Japanese green tea.”
“Oh…cool.”
“Oh whatever, you want to try a bite?”
“Of…”
“My sushi.” Again with that teasing smile.
“Uhm…..okay…”
“It’s hot…”
“How’s it hot it’s raw?”
“It’s spicy.”
“Okay, I’ll still try it.”
Kira picked up a piece of the sushi with her chopsticks like it was something she did all the time and she fed Emily the rolled up thing. The first thing that she tasted was the seaweed stuff that was the wrapped and it was strangely earth and salty but not like anything she’d ever had before and she wasn’t sure that she either loved it or hated it. Then the rice which tasted oddly sweet and tart in another flavor way she’d never known and then there was cucumber, and green onion and something else she’d never had before and then the fish…it wasn’t as slimy as she thought it was and it had another odd flavor and then it hit this full on bloom of heat all over her mouth that was only gentled by chewing it more and letting the seaweed and rice sort of damp it down and the flavors all melded together and played off of each other and just wow.
She liked sushi, she was pretty sure she liked sushi.
Then her own dirty thoughts decided to play with that mental comment all on their own making her blush again.
She swallowed and took a drink of her water. “Hey that wasn’t bad but really hot was that wasabi?”
“No, it was seracha. You can’t get any real wasabi here other than the powdered stuff and I don’t really like that stuff or the paste.”
“What’s seracha?”
“It’s an Asian sweet chilli hot sauce; I like it for stuff like the trout.”
“This was trout?”
“Yeah it’s the freshest thing here that I could get right now and they didn’t have any fresh salmon in.”
“Oh…”
She looked up at Mrs. O’Donnell who came over and took Kira’s cup of tea and glared at her. “You’re coming to the office with me right now young lady.”
“Why?”
“There are no drugs in this school!”
“Drugs? Excuse you?”
“What! Listen here you little so and so, I saw you making this marijuana tea you’re coming with me to the office.”
Kira leaned back on the bench to look at her. “No, you send someone for the police and the principal and the guidance councillor. I saw you talking with those two girls that have been giving me the eyeball all day. Until then you’d just came into the cafeteria so you’re lying.”
“How dare you accuse me of lying you little!” she went to grab Kira.
“Touch me and I’ll charge you with assault.”
Mrs. O’Donnell got really red in the face and someone had said something as the guidance councillor came over. “What’s going on here?”
Kira passed her pack to the guidance councillor. “Apparently she thinks I’m having weed-tea here after she was talking to the bubble gum sisters over there.”
“Oh really?” he looked at Kira who looked back completely unfazed and actually took up another roll of her sushi and ate it staring at both of them.
“Yes Mr. Porter I know the Mary Jane when I smell it and this stuff smells like it!”
He gave her this look and he looked through her pack until he pulled out a package that was very Japanese but also very clearly labelled Green tea.
“Really Martha, How about we leave Kira alone and you and I have a long talk down at the office.”
“But…but… no she’s a dirty little les…”
The guidance councillor gave her a glare. “I really think you’ve said enough.”
She stalked off taking the tea with her fuming. “I’m getting this tested!”
Mr. Porter looked at Kira. “I’m really sorry that this happened if you want to call your parents or lodge a complaint you’re entitled to.”
“Naw, we’re good. It’s just tea.”
“But she had…”
“Not really worth the hassle, but you’ll understand that I’ll likely never take any of the classes that she teaches.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure; it’s more of a giggle really to me.”
“I’m glad that you’re taking it so well I’ll tell you now that we won’t in the office.”
“Hey that’s fine it’s your faculty but just get her in line because the next kid she accuses of something like both of those things might be pretty litigious.”
“Again thank you for being so understanding.”
He left and Emily stared at her. “You should’ve said something; she was totally out of line.”
“No besides she’s old and she’s just an old fashioned bigot. Me not losing my shit over her shows those two over there that their little games didn’t mean shit to me.”
“Can I ask?”
“What?”
“Bubble-gum sisters?”
“Yeah…Blow me and Chew me.”
It started with Emily looking at the two of them and then a snort and a giggle and then just outright laughing as she had never heard two of the most popular girls in school referred to that way.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 7
Chapter 7
Oh she really knew she shouldn’t be laughing. If she was smart she’d just leave Kira to twist in the wind.
But she just couldn’t do that. She wasn’t like that and not only wouldn’t do that she really never’d do that to Kira.
She ate the sushi.
And she was thinking more and more that she might like Sushi too.
She admired her. Chic, unconcernedly styling, Cool, Calm…Mrs. O never even phased her in the slightest and she wasn’t even bothered by the peer pressure thing. It’s like Kira was rewriting how the world worked around her. It was damned amazing and thrilling and it was going to bring down the wrath of the locals and the sheeple with a fury.
They will not like her being that cool and a lesbian or Pansexual?…she’d never heard the term before but here it won’t matter there’s straight and there’s the people that are “Goin t’hell.”
Just thinking of it she looked over to (Snerk) where the popular kids were usually seated and they were together talking closely bent over their tables leaning in and babbling and talking fast and excited.
They reminded her of a bunch of chickens, especially those hens from like the Foghorn Leghorn cartoons…just like them all chicken gossiping.
But past them she saw more hateful looks coming from the straight laced, sweaters and long shirts, dress shirts and ties from the Christian kids…or the god-squad as some called them.
Now the majority of the kids here went to church and they were Christian in the average way that most people are sort of all Jesus-lite until they feel all threatened by something. But these kids were the hardcore Church nutters like the crowd that hung around Mandy Moore in the movie “Saved.”
Yes she said and thought nutters…Emily had enough in her life with some of the towns so called Christians when she was younger. When her Dad left and things had been happening then she remembered the way that her mother was treated by the people in the church when her Dad had left and when her Mom was treated while pregnant with her little sister.
“Looks like you made the God-Squad angry.”
“I thought that I would.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, unfortunately I’ve kind of stereotyped the place after googling it.”
“That was a good idea.”
“What stereotyping?”
“No, googling a place you were moving to.”
“Yeah I had a feeling.”
“They’d hate you on general principle you’re from LA, don’t you know California’s nothing but the land of sinners and heathens.”
“Well they’re kind of right on some places but I liked living in California, there’s a lot of really awesome stuff there I’ve never gotten to see.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, you never think of the stuff you want to see in your home state.”
Emily nodded, that was pretty much true though she really couldn’t think of anything she’d really want to see that badly here in Wyoming.
The bell rang and they headed to homeroom for afternoon registration.
“They take afternoon attendance?”
“Yeah, it’s this post columbine head count deal and a way to see what kids are skipping classes of the last half of school.”
“Oh weird, but I get it. We had campus security and metal detectors at my school.”
“Jeez, I thought you went to like a good school?”
“I did but there was a lot more kids and the cliques were really bad there and they were experts at making people feel like shit enough to do something stupid.”
“Like?”
“School shootings but suicide’s not to uncommon….we lost three in my class in like two years and there was likely a half dozen more attempts.”
“Shit, I thought things were bad here.”
“Likely are too.” Kira actually sighed and got her books and the two girls left to head their separate ways.
The rumor mill kept buzzing.
Kira brought drugs to school.
Kira was a lesbian.
Kira was here because she was arrested for being a hooker.
Emily was a lesbian.
That one was getting started since lunch and the fact she wasn’t a curvy girl and had been closer to being one of the skinny athletic girls that are apparently all lesbians. What she heard wasn’t as vitriolic as the way they were talking about Kira but more along the lines of…. “Ohhh, see we knew it.”
And Kira was still breaking the rules. She’d signed up for both woodworking and auto shop and that had apparently caused a big stink with the shop teachers saying that she’d get hurt or cause people to get hurt?
Something like that…?
No, while the school was open in who could take what legally there wasn’t anyone that bucked tradition and crossed the gender lines. Gay kids that had come out even ended up transferring usually or just stayed in hiding.
Boys didn’t take home ec. Not straight ones and Apparently not Kira either who said she didn’t think that class could teach her anything.
Word actually was she said she was a good cook and that she knew all she needed to know about the rest of the stuff.
Apparently she said to the home ec. Teacher she’d just buy her clothes and get the ones she needed fixed by the repair service offered by most drycleaners.
And there was the hint that she said that wouldn’t it be unpatriotic of her to deny the drycleaners her future business.
They had some pretty old fashioned teachers here but the actual faculty was pretty good.
But it was pretty clear that she wasn’t putting up with getting put in a box by anyone. Not the shop teachers or the Home ec. Teacher. Apparently the autoshop teacher had come around once Kira had started talking cars and that she wanted to restore them and even te woodshop teacher stopped grumbling too much when she explained she wanted to learn how to help her folks in renovating the Diner and the farmhouse.
But Mrs. Warren and Mrs. O were not Kira’s biggest fans.
And apparently Kira not towing the party line with how things “Have always been.” was really so much less than popular with the kids. They were getting stares while waiting for the bus and her sister was keeping her distance with her own circle of friends.
Damn and they’d just sort of started to get along too.
There was a yell from somewhere. “Hey fucking Dyke!”
They were looking around when a football came in out of nowhere, well there was one of the crowds where you couldn’t tell who through it. It was coming right at Kira’s head.
And she caught it.
Silence…she caught it pretty good too not like her trying to girl scared catch it but like it wasn’t a big deal. Kira held it up. “Who’s ball!?” she called out.
More silence….
“Okay! Thanks!”
And Emily almost lost it again as Kira took the football and with a big smile put it in her schoolbag.
Everyone looked shocked first by the catch and then she kept the ball! Some people might have tossed it aside or something like that but no one had thought that she’d keep it.
She had never seen the after school crowd that quiet before it was like this was so left field that they just didn’t know how to react and no one had claimed it and they couldn’t really without having to own up to what they did.
But not everyone was hating this happening either. The fringe kids, the ones that didn’t fit into the popularity models….Emily saw some smiles here and there. And before the idiots could get brave enough for something else they were all getting onto the bus.
It was a quiet bus ride and Emily and Kira talked about some of their classes and the teachers. Apparently they did try to get her to take “Hoe ec.” And the shop teachers weren’t so much trying to keep her out of their classes as trying not to snub another teacher but the woodshop teacher had been a lot more non-plussed to her being in his class because he’d said.
“Boys grow up around tools, especially power tools and a girl might get scared and be too timid to use a tool properly and get herself hurt.”
Kira passed Emily some gum.
“So what’d you do?”
Kira chewed. “I agreed, but I asked him isn’t what these classes are for? And I asked him that if I never had a husband or a boyfriend and needed some work done how would I know what I needed? How would I know that the contractor wasn’t ripping me off? Or what permits I’d need since a lot of contractors won’t bother.”
“And he said okay?”
“Yeah, he even said that they’d never covered permits before and a lot of home maintenance stuff.”
“So the autoshop teacher?”
“Pretty much the same thing, they were pretty open about the idea of girls actually at least knowing enough not to get screwed over.”
“But Mrs. Warren?”
“Oh apparently it’s my duty to cook and clean and sew and make a ever so perfect 1950’s home.”
“You said that?”
“Pretty much and I pretty much meant all the stuff I said too. She didn’t like me asking what kinds of cooking we were going to learn. Apparently she teaches “American cooking.” What do people honestly not get that this is a country of nothing but immigrants?”
“The Indians aren’t immigrants.”
“Okay but you think she’d teach Native American foods?”
“Not a chance, that much I know.”
Kira grinned. “Still not a bad first day. I eve got a new football out of it.”
Emily giggled. “Oh you made some enemies with that one.”
“Yeah.”
“It was still awesome though.”
“Hey, if they want it back they can just ask.”
“There might be some trouble.”
“Really?”
“Really, not yet you’ve still got them on the defensive but they’ll want to put you in your place too…they’re already trying it with me.”
“You’re catching flak?”
“They’re trying to start a lesbian rumor and they’re keeping it light so if I stop being your friend it might stop too.”
“Oh…”
“Well fuck them…they can say what they want. Nobody says who I’m friends with. I’ll never be one of those girls.”
“Em….thanks.”
It got to Kira’s stop and they shared a large hug before Kira got off the bus and even waved as the bus left again.
Emily waved back and smiled.
Her sister though looked less than happy all the way home.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 8
Chapter 8
It was a few stares and a bit of quiet for the rest of the bus ride home. She got off the bus with Angie. She shouldered her backpack and started up the lane. Angie wasn’t too long coming up from behind huffing from trying to catch up.
“Hey…”
“Hey, how was you’re day?”
“Not as interesting as yours.”
“So you guys heard it too huh?”
“About how my sister’s a lesbian?”
“Yeah…that’s what’s going on.”
“Is it true?”
“No…I’m friends with Kira and people don’t like her because she’s great looking and cool and she’s from California so the so called cool kids are threatened. No…the cool girls are threatened because I’d say every guy in school was drooling over her all day.”
Angie frowned at that in a sort of sour way. “She’s not even in my classes, or in my lunch break or nothing but all the guys were doing were trading phone shots of her.”
“See…jealous. I just want to be her friend Angie. She’s not the kind of person that’d hang around with someone like me okay?”
“There’s nothing wrong with you Em.”
“Oh so not even if I was a lesbian?”
“Emily.”
“Angie.”
They looked at each other and Emily didn’t often tease her younger sib, she usually never had the chance or the ammo. She smiled and slowed down and stopped walking at stared at Angie. Looked her up and down.
Angie slowed and stopped. “What?”
“What if I was a lesbian?”
“I…I guess that’d be okay.” Emily was still staring at her.
“Good.”
“Good why?”
“Well…Angela…I definitely have a type…Kira’s taller than me, with a nice full bust…and you’re…”
“I’m what…”
“You’re a lot like that too.”
“Emily!”
Emily stepped up close to her. “What…you are and you’re hot Angela…and it’s not like we’d be messing with kids and stuff because it’s not like I can get you pregnant.”
“Emily!!!”
Emily made kissy faces ay Angie. Who shrieked and fast backpedaled from Emily. “No!, no, no, no!”
Emily bent over laughing and Angie sat there blinking at her.
“You!, you bitch!, I’m going to…”
Emily giggled and ran up the rest of the lane with Angie in hot pursuit. “I’ll get you for that!”
“Oh sure you will I’m the dyke? You’re the one chasing a girl!”
They ran up to the house and inside dropping their book bags off and made a series of dashes around the house until Angie tackled her in the living room.
“Ha, got you!”
She started to tickle and pinch her sister.
T&P was a nasty way of getting even, first you’re tickled into laughing too hard to really defend yourself then the tickler pinches you but you never know where since you’re laughing so hard.
Emily saw only one way out after the fifth pinch.
She kissed Angie full on the lips.
If she had thoughts about what it’d be like kissing Kira…Angie wasn’t it. They both blinked at the kiss and recoiled away from each other with stereo. “Eeeewww!!!”
Emily grabbed some Kleenex and wiped her mouth while Angie grabbed a throw pillow and licked it like she was trying to scrub her tongue.
Then she hit Emily hard with it using a backhanded swing to the boobs. Emily went down holding her chest and seeing pain colors.
“Ow! Angie shit.”
“You Kissed Me!”
“You didn’t leave me any choice you weren’t fighting fair!”
“You Kissed Me!”
“I wasn’t fun for me either!”
“It wasn’t?”
“No! Yeech! It was like kissing all of Mary Kay.”
“Is not, that’s old lady crap.”
“Close enough, less is more little sister.”
“Then don’t kiss me!”
“It was a fucking joke.”
“That wasn’t funny it was disgusting.”
“Yeah it was Mary Kay.” She stuck her tongue out at Angie.
“What funny or disgusting?”
“Both.”
“So Funnigusting?”
“Funnigusting?”
“Laugh to you puke.”
“Angie…”
They looked at each other then they burst out laughing and ended up hugging and heading out to the kitchen.
Both parents were at the airfield working so most of the week supper fell to them and other chores. Angie started in of making a meatloaf. Their dad/step dad hunted and more so since the times got a bit harder. They did alright since planes and stuff were sort of a niche product but fuel went up and other costs so.
A pound of ground beef got two pounds of deer meat hamburger added to it. Yes three pounds of meat sounds like a lot but this would be supper and lunches for the next day or so.
Deer’s gamey so just by family tradition they added chopped up bacon into it along with bread crumbs and onion soup mix, some real onion, Worcestershire sauce and some eggs. Angie also tossed in some All bran too for both the flavor and the fiber.
Emily went out and she mowed the lawn and raked up the yard while Angie was cooking and then pulled some potatoes from their garden and carrots and let those dry a bit before going and getting a few wheelbarrow loads of wood from the shed and dumped them down the cellar doors. They had a wood and oil furnace in the other side of the basement from her room and they had lots of woodland on their property so it was a cheap way to clean things up and have some cheaper heat. A lot of people were going back to the older ways of doing stuff.
She got a basket and grabbed the potatoes and the carrots and some beets and headed inside to help make supper after she washed the veggies and them had a quick shower herself.
The potatoes were getting a mash skin on when they were done. The carrots were tip and tailed and put in a sauce pan. And the beets went in tin foil with some butter and salt and pepper to roast while the beet tops were added to some spinach from the fridge and would get done at the last minute.
They worked together and she made gravy off the juices that came off the meatloaf before they topped it with ketchup and a can of tomato soup. The gravy was just the juices with some A1 steak sauce and a beef bouillon powder then mixed with flour and some canned milk all whisked together and salt and peppered to taste.
Yes…if you’re cheap regular canned milk can be used to replace cream used in most sauces and a lot cheaper.
They usually just had whatever was in the house if they wanted dessert. With three girls in the house they had a lot of snack foods and stuff despite the fact they were all always watching their weight.
They did some laundry while stuff cooked and worked away at their homework until their parents came home.
It was pretty much a normal night and she ate supper with the family at the table. A standard of their house unless you had a very good reason. Then she settled in to watch some TV and some music videos while she surfed the net and checked her Face book.
Kira was definitely the talk of the kids here in town. Lies and insults were just starting and infighting with people that seemed to hate her for no other reason she was new and cool and threatened their hierarchy and then there was those that were talking about giving her a chance.
Then there was Kira’s own Face book page. “Kira Griffin”?
Griffin?
Emily wondered at that part since it wasn’t her last name but…oh wow it was her stage and screen name. There was no porn like a lot might have guessed but she had been in bit parts on several small TV shows nothing really mainstream and stuff but still…that and some modeling of some trendy urban clothes for the “Real-Sized” brand of clothes and some ski wear…it was more than anyone had really done here.
There was pictures and screen shots and even some clips there and lots of stuff for her modeling.
Then ping…she got a friend request from Kira.
She accepted and they talked and talked on chat until it was nearly midnight but it’d only felt like maybe an hour.
Kira must have gotten more friend requests but so far the only one from town…here was her.
Kira eve left her curious by saying. [Hey don’t eat breakfast I’ll bring it.]
[Okay.]
[Nighters Em.]
[Nighters?]
[Goodnight Emily, Sweet Dreams.]
She blushed at that and she went to bed a bit hyper and feeling oddly keyed up at the same time.
It was late or really early but Kira and more importantly parts of Kira’s anatomy woke Emily up. She had so vividly dreamed of touching and fondling Kira’s full big breasts and had woken up with her hands on her pillows.
God she ached…she’d never felt like this before and she was almost too hot, she was too hot and got naked in her own bed for the first time in her life.
The sheets were too much, too good, the feelings were just so stimulating being in the buff in bed…it was just so…college girl.
Her mind drifted along the naughty lines into fantasy…Her hands weren’t her hands as she touched herself…trailed fingers over her skin…cupped her small yet growing and aching breasts….Kira…Kira…Kira…toyed with her nipples played with them before she…she…slipped down and headed south…
Emily knew what she was doing…she had never really, really touched herself that much. She’d been scared of hurting something down there when they never knew what was wrong and she’d been plenty aroused before but this…this time she…
She knew she was smaller there and as she rubbed her sex Kira was lapping away but as she sank two fingers inside…Oh…oh…
“Oh…Kira…oh my fucking gawd…” The strap-on was so huge filling her up as Emily’s two middle fingers filled her and bottomed out inside of her.
“K..Kira..” She moaned as she pistoned her two middle fingers in and out of herself getting more and more wet and pleasure rippled through her body in waves. Her knuckle bumps riding over her strawberry sized clitty.
Her hips bucked and rolled naturally, involuntarily like and other girls and Emily rolled hard over face down as she felt a scream build inside her. Breasts aching and pressed hard into the bed she arched her hips free of the bed using her knees.
Kira had her face down in the bed ass up taking her from behind with the toy, toy, toy, toy…
“Kir…….ra…..” She screamed into the pillows as everything went electric-sex-camera-flashes through brain and body….!
She’d never masturbated herself to orgasm before.
She’d never even had an orgasm before.
She’d never sweated this much or panted this hard outside of running track.
Wow…holy moley big wow…an orgasm was one hell of a trophy.
And she’d never been so glad to have her bedroom in the basement.
Her Mom shook her awake. “Em…Em…Emily! Wake up you slept right through your alarm you’ve only got an hour before the bus gets here.”
She bolted up out of bed. “Shit!” And ran for her bathroom.
“Language young lady!”
“Sorry!”
“This room smells like sex!”
“Sorry!”
Emily double faced palmed in the shower. Her mother had smelled what she did last night. She was mortified, embarrassed and…
“I’m not washing these sheets young lady.”
“Yes mom!” Oh please stop.
“Use some baking soda in the wash water!”
“Yes mom!” Shut up, shut up, please just shut up she prayed.
“Next time use a towel!”
“Mom!!!”
She shrieked at her and washed hurriedly, and dried off fast and ran out and yanked the sheets off her bed so fast she nearly pulled the mattress off and ran to the washer and stuffed them inside and turned it on with lots of liquid soap.
Her mom gave her a look and had that smug parent smile on her face and tossed her the Febreeze. “Maybe you should get dressed?” then headed up stairs.
Emily cursed her way through things as fast as she could go. An hour, well an hour to get ready for school is really not nearly enough time for a teenaged girl.
She was panting and stressed and tired as she waited with Angie at the end of the lane to wait for the bus.
Angie was listening to her I-pod and looked at her.
“If you did lez out and had a sex dream about Kira what are you going to do when you see her this morning?”
Shock ran through Emily…she’d bee so busy she’d never even thought of that.
And then the bus was pulling up way too soon. Emily got on and noticed a few looks from some of the people that usually never bothered. It could be the way she was dressed or the fact she was getting associated with Kira.
She hated having wet hair, she barely really had time to get it combed right. And she was wearing a skirt for a change…well not a change she had wanted to. Had she wanted o look nice?
Skirt, fawn colored blouse, shoes instead of sneakers. But she was feeling the fall chill of no leggings or panty hose not that she owned panty hose. It was not her usual outfit.
The bus stopped at Kira’s house and the kids were all looking but trying not to look and Kira came up onto the bus.
Oh… Emily thought or rather her thoughts stopped at…Oh.
Kira was wearing these really expensive light brown knee high leather boots with a three inch heel, faded jeans that hugged her hips and everything else super tight but not in the embarrassing way that some girls wore them.
Of course not she’s a model.
She had on a light cream colored sweater that had a plunging v-neck that showed off those amazing breasts and her light coral pink bra, a high end bra too definitely Victoria Secret styled. She wore a fringed brown suede jacket that matched her boots and it all set off her blonde hair and her other touches were just amazing too from her light touch on her make up to the really nice but prolific earrings she was wearing and the cuff and bangle jewelry or the black stone wolf head pendant she was wearing on a black cord around her neck.
High end, casual, edgy, local too almost.
Emily felt her mouth get dry ad her breasts…she because so aware of her breasts. She’d ached in that last night way and she swore that her nipples were so hard they’d work their way through her clothes.
Kira had a take out tray of coffees? And her backpack over her shoulder and swayed and runwayed without even trying down to where Emily was sitting. The sheeple watched her, some now smiling at her some frowning and a few making room for Kira to sit now but instead she went to Emily and slid into the seat beside her.
She smelled so good.
“Morning.” Kira said smiling.
“Morning…you’re a model huh.”
“Was a model I only did it for a year.”
“Why just a year?”
“Couldn’t work it with my grades.”
“Oh.”
“Yep, breakfast?”
“Uhm…okay.”
Kira passed Emily one of the coffee cups thick waxed paper/cardboard types used by a lot of coffee places. It was heavy and it smelled awesome. She lifted the lid and saw this mess with what looked like apple pie filling on it.
“What’s this?”
“Kira Krunch Betty.”
“Huh?”
“Apple crisp but with granola instead of the oatmeal topping and instead of the thick bottom stuff I added in cereal.”
“Cereal?”
“Yeppers, some Cinnamon toast crunch and French toast crunch and just a bit of cream.”
Emily took the spoon she was offered and Kira took her own and settled her book bag so the tray was there with. “Coffees?” She asked. Kira nodded wedging her legs by her knees against the seat ahead of them.
Emily couldn’t take her eyes off the way that bunched up Kira’s breasts and it let her stare right into her cleavage.
She closed her eyes and crossed her legs over and over squirming a bit at the way the sight was making her feel.
She spooned some of the hot breakfast Kira had made to distract herself from the feelings she was having. Oh it was good, it was very, very good.
Hot crunchy granola clusters with almonds and dates all mixed in with the cinnamon and sugar from the cereal and the buttery almost pancake syrup from the other cereal all robed in hot apple pie filling and just enough cream to get you right in between the milk on cereal effect and melty vanilla ice cream.
She moaned around her spoon. “Oh…Oh Kira this is fantastic.” She was getting looks heck they were all getting looks as the smell was permeating the bus.
Kira smiled and it was so strong that close up. “Thanks it’s something me and a friend invented for cold surfing days.”
“You surf?”
“Not well but yeah a little.”
“Wow.”
“Not really I just lived close enough to the ocean to try it.”
“Still.”
Kira shrugged like all of these things she’d done didn’t matter at all with her and how cool it made her. She just ate her stuff and unlady like offered Emily. “Coffee?” with her mouth full.
Emily blinked and took the cup she offered. Didn’t she know how much more cool she was for not caring, for acting not perfect and normal? Looking down from her vantage point with Kira looking up at her that stunning face all the more perfect for the spoon in her mouth and the smile in her eyes Emily felt something seriously take this good? lurch inside her chest.
Oh god she was so into this girl. The head of feeling of a crush was definitely there. She watched Kira eat while she ate too and...
No one she’d ever known had made her or brought her breakfast before. Actually it was the first time she’d ever heard of it really. Well there was some kids that brought stuff into home room or the breakfast in bed thing but this, this was as out of the box as Kira was.
“Emily?”
“Hmm…Yeah?”
“You look really nice today.”
Emily blushed and smiled. “Thanks….you…you too.”
Kira look more that nice but Emily just wasn’t going to blurt out that she was beautiful, stunning, gorgeous.
And was the way Kira said it friendly or more than the friendly comment? It made her feel good all the same like when boys she liked said stuff like that. It wasn’t something that happened often either.
They sort of just smiled and shared breakfast like that all the way into school.
It was such a “sushi” moment right at the start of her day.
X-Why-Me...Chapter 9
Chapter 9
Emily couldn’t keep from smiling through most of the morning. The breakfast and the coffee on the bus was such a pleasant surprise for her that it still made her feel a warm and happy feeling inside.
It really sort of took the things she’d been feeling too about Kira and sort of framed them in her head in a new way. She knew that she might be crushing on Kira. But there’s a big difference between knowing that you’re crushing on someone and doing anything about it.
And there was still the fact that she was trying to figure out just what kind of crush she was having.
She had a sex dream about her. A lesbian sex dream but there was also that she really liked Kira as a person. Okay tow days is sort of hard to tell if you can like some one really or it isn’t there are some people that you just like or don’t right off the bat and then there’s the fact that she’s XY CAIS?
She had read more and more on the thing and she was really no closer in putting her tomboyish ways and looks to being genetically a boy. And she still wondered if it is true then was this influencing the way she was seeing Kira?
She was sort of thinking on that as she tried to read the sonnets assigned for English. She kind of felt a bit of jealously over some of the XY CAIS girls she had seen in her research, now she knew that she and other girls like that didn’t all fit in that category but some of those XY girls were really girly and they were gorgeous.
But Kira said she was cute.
Actually she said she was more than cute.
The bell rang and she headed out for the morning break for classes and she met up with Kira at the school canteen and Kira was all smiles as she was buying a chocolate milk and these mini ice cream cone snack things filled with marshmallows and colored sugar.
Emily got herself a diet Pepsi and sat beside here in the hall and waved off Kira’s offering hand. “Eww no thanks I’m not into that much sugar.”
Kira chewed the one she had going and swallowed. “I love these things and most marshmallow treats really I have a weird taste in the stuff I like.”
“Really, okay I know you like sushi but those are that weird.”
“They are home, where I went to school kids didn’t eat this kind of stuff that much unless it was like Easter or Halloween or Christmas. Otherwise it just wasn’t done.”
“Huh?”
“Just that whole preppy gotta look like a starving waif fashion thing that they obsess over.”
“Oh yeah I kinda thought that you were sort of like that with the California thing and the modeling and all that.”
“Oh it was that way for about four months of me modeling and when they told me that I needed to lose weight and that I needed to follow this diet and spend all my free time with this trainer I told them to fuck off and quit.”
“Oh…” Emily stared at her. That was brave not just quitting but being able to pass up all the fame or the money. “But you’re not afraid to get fat?”
“Not really, I really don’t dwell on it. I like doing physical things and I usually burn most of it off but I’m not scared of it actually. You get scared of it then it runs your life.”
“Yeah, I’ve always had the opposite problem; it just seems that I’ve always had trouble putting the weight on.”
Kira looked at Emily up and down in that appraising way and nodded. “I knew a few girls like you too back home and that’s no fun either.”
Emily nodded. “It’s the thing that’s kinda drove me batty for a long time and I’ve tried the sugars diet and the high fat ones too to try and get some weight on. I’m not too much of a sugar junky and I can take or leave most of the greasy stuff.”
Kira looked at her. “Ask the gym teacher, the guys coach.”
Emily looked at her sharply heart hammering. “W..Why?”
“He’s got guys trying to lose or make weight all the time he might know some stuff that will help you keep some weight on where you want it.”
“Oh…oh wow I never thought of that but you’re right.”
“You ask your doctor?”
“Not yet I just started seeing another doctor, I’ll bring it up with her too.”
“Good idea.”
The bell rang and the hugged…Emily found herself awash with this warm fuzzy yay feeling at the sensation of being pressed against Kira’s chest. She blushed and then went off to class where she was just more than slightly distracted in the quiet moments by that lingering memory.
That lasted into lunch where she ended up waiting for Kira who was getting her coat and heading off the school grounds.
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
“Where are you heading off to?”
“Over town to the diner.” Kira said. “You want to come with?”
“Uhm…sure.”
She normally ate at the cafeteria but they were allowed to head of campus on they lunches and free periods as long as they signed out. She signed out and got her coat and they walked over town. She had to keep a pretty good pace as Kira walked quite fast.
They went about five blocks before getting to the diner and it had been shut down for several years with the economy in the tank and had been started up a few times as different places to eat by different people but nothing had really stuck as a business here.
There was brown paper taped to the windows and doors to keep people from looking in and there was a home made drop box outside on the sidewalk with a sign saying. “Please feel free to tell us your favorites as we’re making our menu.”
Emily smiled at that. “Hey that’s kind of smart.”
“Dad’s idea because a lot of people have favorites and if the locals don’t like the food then you’re not going to get a lot of business.”
Emily nodded. “That actually makes a lot of sense.”
They knocked and went inside and there were these men there in painter’s coveralls and another in old clothes and the tools for applying the putty stuff for drywall. Three of the men she sort of knew and they were locals and that was a good sign that they were hiring locals to help with the work. Some of the other places didn’t do that and tried to do the work by themselves and one guy had tried to set up a pizzeria here on the cheap.
She introduced Emily to her dad. He was the guy mudding the drywall and he shook her hand. “I’m always glad to meet a friend of Kira’s.” Then he said to his daughter. “It’s really nice to see that you’re making friends this early, that’s a change for you.”
“Daaad…”
“Well I am it’s been awhile since you brought anyone around.”
“Well Emily’s not a fake like some of the others were.”
“Good, You here to give you mom a hand?”
“That and some lunch.”
“Have fun.”
Emily nodded to Kira’s father who was a pretty good looking guy actually with this sort of used to be a business guy look that had been pared down to just regular working clothes and a bit of unshaven scruff going on but in that handsome scruffy guy way. He actually sort of reminded her a little of Kevin Costner.
They went into the kitchen and there was a lot of this stainless steel big time kitchen stuff that she didn’t really recognize. Well the flat top and the walk ins were about that and the place was smelling of detergents and cleansers and there was the smell of baked goods too.
She saw this woman there wiping and scrubbing away at what looked like a giant sink set up. She was in work boots and faded jeans that she filled out as well as Kira did and she was this tanned ash blonde in a simple tank top and she smiled as they came in and straighten up from where she was washing.
“Hey honey who’s this?’
“Mom this is Emily, she’s a friend from school.”
“You’re making friends that great honey! I’m Kelly I’m so glad to meet you!”
She swayed over to them and hugged Emily. She was definitely Kira’s mom, she was very attractive and she was very large busted she might even be an E cup.
“It’s very nice to meet you ma’am.”
Kira’s mom smiled and she looked at the girls. “Here for lunch?”
“That and to help out Mom.” Kira said.
“Well you don’t have that much time off but if the two of you can take the trash bags out in the back to the dumpster that’d be a big help.”
Emily nodded. “Sure thing we’ll be happy to.”
They went out back and there was a lot, a lot of garbage with everything from just dirt and stuff in general to the stuff they tore out and were throwing away like old wallpaper and drywall chunks and a lot of general garbage too. It still looked like there was a lot of stuff they were going to have to do to get the place ready and everything but there must have been close to twenty bags of garbage and trash to take out back to the dumpsters.
They were washing up at the sink in the back of the diner and she looked at Kira. “You guys are getting a lot done.”
“Thanks we’ve been at it for nearly two weeks and that’s like the third time I’ve dropped that much trash in the dumpster.”
“Two weeks?”
“We had to get the farm and the house in order and fixed up some too so there was a lot of that kind of stuff to do too.”
“Oh, I suppose.”
“The house is really a work in progress.”
“I can see how it might its pretty old.”
“Old but kind of neat, I’ve never been in a place that had a stone laid basement before.”
She nodded. “There’s a few places like that around here. I’ve never been out to your farm.”
“You’re welcome to come any time that you want to I’ll remind you that it’s still a work in progress.”
“Okay…okay I won’t expect much.”
“It’s why I wanted to take shop, especially wood shop with the folks here then I can learn to do stuff that I want to get done at home and stuff.”
“Makes sense but what if they don’t do those things as projects in class?”
“I’m going to ask questions, lots of them and I had the impression that after I talked to the shop teacher that he might actually be game for that.”
“Really?”
“I think so, I’d really rather know how to block drafts and weather strip my windows and stuff than make a spice rack.”
Emily laughed. “That’s so true actually like Home Ec. There’s stuff there that we should know too that they don’t teach. I think how to shop and get deals and stuff should ne taught or like not just cooking and sewing but other stuff like how to clean a stove or an oven the right way or how to fix little things like a toilet without having to call a guy to help or a plumber but they don’t teach that stuff.”
Kira nodded. “One of the reasons why I’m not taking that class is the whole oh no…I’m a helpless girl mentality the teacher is pushing.”
“Maybe I’ll start asking questions too?”
“You should and get ready to complain when she has an ancient freak out.”
“Yeah well welcome to Wyoming. Where the internet is scarce and marryin yer cousin ain’t.” Emily put on her best red-neck drawl and Kira laughed which was very cool because she usually wasn’t the funny one.
They headed out into the kitchen where Kira’s mother was taking out a large rectangular pie out of one of these ovens with side by side doors? It smelled really good. It was actually the best piece of chicken pot pie she had ever had with a really great creamy gravy and just regular veggies in it like chunks of potatoes and peas and carrots with maybe a few really small chopped up bits of other things like maybe celery it wasn’t fancy but it was really good. You could taste and tell that her mother had roasted the chicken before she added it into the filling and the top crust was really great and not pie crust like the bottom but it was puff pastry.
Emily moaned her way through half of her piece and leaned on the counter when she was done really full. “Ma’am that was amazing.”
Her mom beamed. “Really you think so I sort of stole bits and pieces of the recipe from a few places that I’ve been to.”
“Really it was fantastic.”
“Good! Hopefully I’ll be able to sell them along with serving them.”
Emily nodded. Actually she didn’t know anyplace other than the Whole-foods supermarket across town that made home made ready to take home and cook or already cooked anything. It wasn’t as back-water as she let on half the time really there was just a lot of mid-west attitudes about people and how they should be but at the same time people were still really busy and this might do pretty well.
They said their good byes and headed back to school taking it a bit slower from both of them being full while Kira filled Emily in about the state of the farm house and her room.
It was all in all a pretty great way to spend her lunch break. She had a great dinner and she kind of felt like she got something accomplished from giving them a hand.
The afternoon flew by pretty fast and she stayed past the first bus run to try out for the girl’s basket ball team. She’d thought about it for a few years in a row now but this year. She wasn’t even sure why but she kind of seen herself in a varsity jacket walking beside Kira as they’d been walking back from the diner.
Emily admitted that she really should have paid more attention to the girls playing on the team before. While she could keep up with them in running her ball skills weren’t good at all and most of these girls had been playing since middle school.
She was kind of bummed out and to make matters suck a bit more even here the rumors were floating around about her and Kira. That they were lesbians and that they took off today to make out and that Kira was all butch-gay and was in shop.
Emily could’ve argued but she wasn’t just in the mood after the whole idea of her getting a varsity jacket to wear was drifting away from her. And there was no way that she was going to put herself at the non-mercy of the cheer bitches from hell and try out for them.
She felt someone watching her and looked back behind her and saw Trent Lincoln and her Ex-jack following her and she didn’t like the way that they were looking at her. She started walking faster and faster and so did they and she heard Trent yell at her. “Where you going dyke?” and Jack calling after her. “I want a fucking explanation Emily! You’re not going to fucking humiliate me again.”
Again? WTF?
“Again? Jack you dumped me!”
“You wouldn’t fucking put out but you’re spreading you legs for the California slut!”
“We’re friends!” she started to run. There weren’t a whole lot of people around this late after school and those that did stuck to the gym which was behind her or the music rooms or the cafeteria while waiting for the late bus run.
She was scared.
And they had a look in their eyes that really made her think that they wanted to hurt her.
Trent nearly caught her and ripped off her back pack, and then jack tried to grab her and then Trent and she wasn’t so much as running now as trying to just keep out of their reach from their grabs and she even threw herself into one of the walls to bounce away from it to sort of surprise them and change direction. She did and narrowly avoided Trent and got passed them and scooped up her backpack and ran down the hall towards the cafeteria with them chasing her.
Jack was really pissed and mad dog angry. “You little lezzie twat I’m going to show you wha…” Hs threat was cut off in a squelched sound of pain and she looked back to see Matt Hunter one of the football players standing over a fallen Jack and Trent was trying to back pedal and stop and ran into Matt’s big fist whether he wanted to or not.
Jack was curled in a ball around his stomach, he’d definitely been hit.
Matt looked at her. “Emily, you want to press charges on these two?”
She looked at Matt. “I…I…I don’t know…”
“I’m a witness.”
“I…I…” She really didn’t know what to do, she had been having those feelings and yet she hadn’t done anything but be Kira’s friend and they tried to do this? Jack was acting like he might have been going to…she started to cry.
She didn’t know what to do!
Trent tried to move and Matt clobbered him again driving him to the floor and pointed a warning finger at Jack. “Stay the fuck down.”
Emily had never seen a guy do what Matt just did and hugged herself after dropping her backpack and she couldn’t stop shaking.
Matt looked at her and reached in his pocket and took out his cell phone. And he dialled. “Hello 911? I’d like to report an attempted assault and an attempted rape.”
She heard him talking and everything felt kind of grey and then went black.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 10
Chapter 10
Things went from black to this fuzzy grey and Emily could smell something sweet yet not cloying this really lovely almost mixture or flowers, citrus and vanilla…Kira’s perfume.
But it was after school?
After school.
Jack and the asshole…
Grabbing her, trying to grab her! Oh my god they were going to!
“Aaah!!!” She sat up with a scream and planted her face into Kira’s shirt and cleavage.
“Oh god you’re okay…” Kira said her voice flooded with relief. Emily hung on and cried into Kira’s chest and it took a few minutes before she felt safe…and that she felt…oh.
They were so soft and they felt so amazing it actually sort of stunned her a few minutes. She slowly pulled away and rubbed at her eyes and blushed. It wasn’t just Kira there but her sister and the principal and Matt as well as a police officer, actually a female state trooper since there were no women on the town police force. Well not as patrol officers…and her folks were there.
She was in the hospital? She didn’t remember getting there and she had a painful bump on the back of her head too.
Her mom looked at Emily her eye’s looking red from crying and was hanging onto her dad.
It went a little chaotically at first with several people wanting to know if she was okay and trying to fuss over her and the police/Trooper matron asked then to please wait outside.
They left willingly but looks of concern too and she sat with the female officer and went through a short but really detailed account of what had happened. Except for Matt…Matt had come to her rescue and she didn’t want to get him in trouble and she said that she hadn’t really seen what had happened with that because it all happened so fast.
She wasn’t sure that the officer really believed her but she also didn’t seem too interested in what Matt had done other than stop them.
The officer made it pretty short but it still had made Emily pretty shaky afterwards reliving what had happened. All Emily had to do was close her eyes and it was all there. Jack his face this red twisted mass of anger…he hated her and Trent…she really didn’t know Trent but what she did know wasn’t good. A few of the girls that had dated him had said he was a jerk.
Turns out he was a homophobe too.
But were they right? Am I gay?
Heck I’m XY…I might be CAIS but is it possible to be…like me and still be naturally attracted to girls?
She got up and checked her things open and noticed that her top had been torn at the neck, she hadn’t noticed that at the fight or the chase or whatever you could’ve called what had happened but it just gave her the chills.
She slipped out into the hall where everyone was waiting and her mom was the first one to hug her and then Angie then her dad. It felt good actually and she just sank into all the hugs and stuff.
The principal went over to her when the hugging was done. “I am so sorry that this happened Emily, I really am and I can tell you that some of them chasing you were caught on the school’s security cameras and I won’t tolerate these things happening at my school. The two boys have been expelled for the year alright?”
“Okay…I mean yes sir.”
“I mean it we’re not going to have these kinds of things going on here.”
“It…they thought I’m gay sir.”
“That doesn’t matter Emily, everyone has the right to have a peaceful education in my school and I’ll make sure that this gets a whole lot more attention.”
“That might be good sir; I mean…I…isn’t it hard enough being different?”
“Yes, yes it is and trust me things are going to be different.”
“Thank you sir.”
He shook her hand and she shook it back and he left talking with the officer and Matt came over and she hugged him hard. “Thank god you were there Matt, you saved my life.”
He blushed and he shrugged. “I have sisters and a mom and a girlfriend I just couldn’t just watch right?”
“A lot of people might have…they thought I was a Lesbian and wanted to do things…”
“Yeah there’s no shortage of fucktards is there?”
(Sniffle-smile.) “No…too bad I was dating one of them.”
He passed her a can of Mountain Dew out of his pocket. “Look I want to talk to you later okay? I have to go though the coach and my folks want to talk to me and stuff.”
“Okay…are you in trouble?”
“No, not likely but this did bring stuff up at least for the team. I think my folks just want to see if I’m okay and that I’m not going to be in any legal trouble.”
“If you are? If Jack and Trent are going to press charges?”
He smiled and shrugged like it was nothing. “You’re okay; it’d still be worth it.”
Emily smiled and she blushed and she felt the stirrings that she’d get with boys kind of there with Matt. It was too bad he had a girlfriend….she watched him go but getting hugs from her mom and a big hand shake from her dad and a bit too friendly of a hug from Angie who she was sure pressed her chest into him a bit too much. If she did Matt said nothing and waved goodbye to them all.
She looked over at Kira who smiled at her and she felt like crying all over again and sort of just wanted to slip into her…
Kira just walked over to her and wrapped her up in a hug. “It’s okay Em I’m here.”
“Thank you…” she wanted to know why she was here because Kira had left before she had but at the same time she was so glad that she was here and holding her that she didn’t even want to bring it up.
She was getting this “look” from Angie but luckily her mom didn’t seem to catch it.
She sort of knew what this could look like but she felt good here, safe. And Kira’s embrace was stronger than she thought it would be it. It was nice, not like strong like Matt would be but different.
And Matt…she definitely felt that pull that guys always had there so…was she gay, straight? Bisexual?
Her sister coughed and she looked up from Kira’s shoulder. She hadn’t even noticed that she had put her head there. “Mnn….?” She had also almost fallen asleep right there too…it was like Kira had melted the stress away.
Angie looked at her. “C’mon mom wants to get you home.”
Emily looked and they’d already left ahead of them likely to go and get the car. “Okay, I’ll be right there.”
“Fine…don’t be too long; mom’s going to watch you like a hawk for awhile after this.”
“Okay…”
Angie left but gave the two of them another look before going and Emily blushed. “Angie thinks that I might be a lesbian because of the way that we just clicked.”
“Well given where you buried your face when you woke up it almost looks that way.”
“Sorry I didn’t mean to do that.”
“I wasn’t complaining Emily.”
“What?”
Kira looked at her and she could see the shimmer there of tears? “Kira?”
Kira bit her lower lip. “I like you Emily, I do I like you a lot…and I’m…I’m attracted to you…I know that this is maybe a shock to you or maybe not but I want to get to know you better….if that’s just as friends great but…you deserve to know that I’ve been kind of crushing on you a little since we met…”
Whoa…
It was shy, Kira was scared but she was so brave and that shy made her look all the more beautiful all at the same time.
“I…I like you too Kira…you’ve…god, I never…and girls and you…and…”
Kira move her arms from Emily’s side to the curve of her waist…. “So….we get to know each other better…?”
Emily nodded…. “I…I…I’d like that too Kira.”
Kira gave Emily this sweet dizzying smile. “Thank you Emily…”
She leaned in and gave her this whisper soft kiss on her cheek and let her hands go. “Call me, okay?”
Emily only nodded as Kira left and she started to follow her but Kira went into the ladies room and Emily walked to the lobby and outside where her family was waiting in the car. Her dad got out and opened the door for her looking at her.
“Are you going to be okay kiddo?”
“What…oh yeah...I’ll be okay daddy I guess…it’s just been a hell of a day.”
“I can only imagine honey.”
Emily slide into the car thinking.
No….you really can’t.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 11
Chapter 11
Kira bit her lower lip. “I like you Emily, I do I like you a lot…and I’m…I’m attracted to you…I know that this is maybe a shock to you or maybe not but I want to get to know you better….if that’s just as friends great but…you deserve to know that I’ve been kind of crushing on you a little since we met…”
The attack had really messed Emily up and she had a few bruises and they were pretty bad but that night when she’d gotten home it just kept popping up. How pissed they were and how much Jack and Trent wanted to really hurt her.
And then there was Matt showing up and being so darned great…and saved her.
But Kira too, she dropped everything she was doing and rushed to her and then she’d pretty much admitted she liked Emily.
So the first night home after all of this she bounced between nightmares of Jack and Trent hurting her or worse to being awake and thinking about Kira.
And Kira was seriously easy for her to think about.
She ended up not getting more than three spotty hours of sleep and her Mom had phoned her in as being “sick” and that she was going to take some time. That was one of the surprises in this. Her mom. She was sort of either expecting her to baby her and smother her or be in that social shock my daughter’s a lesbian or something freak out like she had when they had found out that Emily was CAIS. After all it was what everyone was likely talking about with what Jack and Trent had been ranting about.
Instead she was there and supportive, quiet hugs at first and she ran her a bath but she sort of gave her comfort and space and even kept Angie from getting smothering close. It was nice Angie wanted to be there and do the sister thing but…
She just felt so…raw.
And there was this look in her mother’s eyes that said she knew. Women…regardless of what kind of women that they are usually and unfortunately have been victimized by men…not all men but some asshole or assholes will have crossed their paths. And her mom…given her reputation…she’d likely been more than likely…experienced in someone being assaulted.
And despite the way she and her mom usually were this sort of made up the difference.
Angie did though get up extra early the next morning and came down an hour before she usually did to get ready for school and she crawled into bed and held Emily.
She really did appreciate the gesture.
It was a little weird being home alone from school and not being actually sick. Her dad checked on her.
“Hey kiddo you doing okay?”
Emily shifted under her comforter. “Yeah, I guess dad, just kinda…I dunno, messed up?”
“You want to talk?”
“No, I’m just trying to wrap my head around what Jack did.”
“I don’t get it either Em; no guy should act like that.”
“But why do the dad? What’s wrong if I was into Kira and not him?”
“Some guys…I don’t know Em, I was going to say some guys get jealous but I don’t get it either. There’s jealous sure and even mad yeah but getting violent….I just don’t get it honey.”
“Dad…that’s okay that’s a good thing.”
He looked at her and slid him hands into his pockets. “So Kira huh?”
Emily blushed. “Yeah…maybe, I don’t know.”
“She’s a looker.”
“Daaad.”
“Just saying, if you are thinking you might like girls you could do a lot worse.”
“I know.” Emily flopped backwards on the bed. “It’s not just that she’s so gorgeous but she’s brave too and she’s nice.”
“Nice is good, nice is really good.”
“Really? It seems all the popular girls are bitches.”
“Being good looking doesn’t make someone a good person Em I always like to think life kind of actually starts after high school.”
“Mom says that high school’s the best time of my life.”
Her dad shrugged. “Honestly your mom’s saying that because that’s when she was on top.”
Emily looked at him. “Does that make you mad?”
“No, not really. I mean I get it, I get her and she’s been through a lot. Honestly Emily I love your Mom, but I love her because of her scars.”
“Huh?”
“When we were your age your mom’s not the kind of girl that I’d have gone out with.”
“But she was pretty and popular don’t all guys want the cheer-hottie?”
“Not me and a lot of other guys too and that’s not because we were mad because we weren’t good enough like some of them say. Some of us just wanted the nice girl, someone that fun to be with and go out with and you like.”
“And if I want that too? With a girl?”
“Honey, love and caring and all those good things have never, ever depended on gender.”
“And Mom? You love her now?”
“Oh definitely honey. You’re mom is such a decent person, sweet and loving too.”
“Mom?” She asked sort of surprised.
“Emily your mom wears some of the thickest armor; she’s had to grow it.”
“Dad…?”
He sort of had this soft smile on his face. “She can tell some of that to you on her own honey.”
“Dad?”
“Yes honey?”
“Thanks, I mean…I mean it helped.”
“You’re welcome honey.”
He left and her mom came down. “Hey…”
“Hi Mom.”
“You need anything?”
“No, I think I’m good.”
“You’ll be okay here alone?”
“Yeah I think so.”
“Okay, do me a favor?”
“Sure mom.”
“Come upstairs and lock the doors behind us?”
“Okay mom.”
She still took her comforter and had it wrapped around her as everyone left and she watched the car go and went to make a pot of coffee. And looked around for some comfort food before she went back downstairs to her room to look on her computer.
She abandoned her food search in the need for some comfort and ended up running herself a hot bubble bath and sinking into it with a wince for her bruises. Definite bruises on her shoulder and her hip from bouncing herself off the wall to get away.
It felt good though once the heat got in there and she started to relax and think. She was always thinking lately ever since she had found out about being XY CAIS, it had changed things. She knew it hadn’t really changed everything but it had changed everything.
Genetically a boy.
It worms its way into a persons head.
Emily pulled her legs up and felt her body…she had a female body, well except for her insides…she never felt like a boy she really didn’t know how a boy felt? But inside…now? She was sort of sure she didn’t feel all girl now.
It made her wonder, and she was kind of sick of asking herself why me?
Emily sighed and slid a hand down her body, down the curve of her pelvis and slip her fingers over her labia.
Sigh…no boy could feel like this right?
Emily shivered in a good way as her fingers made the nerves down there dance with joy. She bit her lip and inhaled through her nose as she sank two fingers inside and the fullness mixed with the heat of the hot water.
It was nothing like…boy’s could feel this, the feeling of something this…she moved her fingers deeper and back and forth her clitty rigid enough she let each finger slip passed either side of it.
She moaned, bit her lip some more.
She was a girl…Her name was Emily, she’d always been raised as a girl she had parts like a girl and a boy would never want more of that feeling as she moved her fingers inside and outside of herself.
Emily slipped into that place where you close your eyes or they go half lidded as you think about that someone else that was doing the things to you that you were doing but wanted them to.
Or as Angie would crudely say picturing someone doing you while she was Jilling-off.
At first it was a boy, she was thinking of a guy and it was pretty ambigious too, the guy she just sort of couldn’t get him to take shape as she was in the middle of the fantasy of him moving inside her and she arched her back and panted through her first orgasm and it was halfway into her second when he became Kira wearing a strap on toy…or it was Kira’s fingers sinking into her.
And this time Emily was sure that it made a difference. That it being Kira made her want it more, want her touch and made her wetter.
Emily lasted until her forth before she was spent and at the same time she was done because it wasn’t her. There was sort of this point were all that release was great but it was just that release and not what she was really was craving and that was to be with Kira.
She wasn’t even sure if the need was entirely sexual and or that she just wanted to be with her, to share the same space with her.
Sated and pruned from being in the bath that long she dried off and crawled back into new pajamas and her cookie monster slippers and she got another coffee and went upstairs and got the lap top and she moved herself and her comforter into the living room and she watched TV and surfed the internet looking up CAIS girls online and seeing just what was what while she ate Honey Nut Cheerios right from the box.
Emily thought after a few hours of reading and munching that she was actually really lucky. Some CAIS women were not as lucky as she was. Oh there were some of them that sort of hit this stereotype that being CAIS XY was like this recipe for super female but for most it wasn’t she saw and read stories of CAIS girls that were like her slender and not really busty or some that seemed to be overburdened with huge bust and their bottom conditions all seemed to be a gambit too many XY CAIS girls were shallow like Emily was and some of them even more. Some of these girls almost lacked a clitoris or had an oddly shaped one and some girls were so small inside they needed lube and dilating before they could even get close to intercourse.
And some of the pictures and things she had seen where pretty graphic and at the same time made her feel that she was a lot less freaky that she thought she was.
It was about two on the afternoon before she got dressed out of her Pj’s and went outside and got some of the wood in and worked away at her chores. There was only so much TV and computer she could watch without feeling like a slug.
She even took advantage of the time home to wash and put some potatoes on to bake slowly for supper and cook up some hamburger patties in some frozen gravy with lots of onions all nice and slow like homemade Salisbury steaks she’s open some canned veggies to go as a side and she made one of the few desserts that she could make well from Home Ec. Peanut putter pie.
She used just a graham wafer crust and she took a bowl of Jello brand Butterscotch pudding mix and she added 2 cups of microwave softened peanut butter to it and blended it all together by the time the pudding set up the peanut butter would be all through the pie. Some whipped cream on top and that’s it.
He sister came home first and she had Emily’s homework with her and the second night home was still kind of quiet but a bit less strained. She went to bed early or rather to her bedroom and worked away at her homework until her phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Hey, how are you feeling?” It was Kira’s voice and she could feel this little zing happen through her.
“Better now that I got to her from you.” Emily blushed and she smiled and grabbed a pillow and tucked it under herself hugging it.
“Really?” There was an anxious sound in her voice?
“Yes really…I’ve been thinking about what you said.”
“You have?”
“Yes, a lot.”
“Oboy…and?”
“I like you too, I really like you too.”
“Really!?” Emily smiled and bit her lips.
Kira sounded so happy about that and it gave her those awesome tickling warm butterflies inside. She’s never really gotten that kind of happy return from someone before that liked her.
“Yes really.” She couldn’t help it but she laughed as she said it.
“Wow…” Oh that was sexy and breathless.
Emily smiled just at the sound of that and at the thought of (Did I do that?) it was really heady and very buzzy happy feeling. Then there was a crashing sound in the back ground and there was the sound of breaking fragile things and she winced.
“You’re at the diner?”
“Uhm yeah, dad tripped over something. I got to go there’s white bowls and plates everywhere.”
“Okay…be careful.”
Kira laughed and it was a really nice laugh too. “Okay, I will are you sure you’re okay?”
“I will be now.”
“Okay I’ll see you later?”
“I’m…I’m uhm taking tomorrow off too, Mom want’s me to decompress I think.”
“It’s a good idea; it takes awhile to shake it off.” Kira’s voice was kind of serious sounding, like speaking from experience.
“Are you going to be okay Kira? It sounds like this brought stuff up?”
“Yeah, just some bad memories from home.”
“I thought people’d be cool about you out there in California.”
“Just some, Just some Em.”
“Hey…”
“Yeah?”
“Hugs.”
“Thanks, I’ll talk to you later?”
“Sure.”
Emily went to bed and she had lots of good dreams that night, good Kira dreams and some were spicy and hot but others we her mind drifting to the maybes and other things that might be. Like kissing or walking and holding hands or just cuddled together watching a movie.
The next morning was sort of the same drill except for having been woken by a rude dream of Trent and some faceless thugs breaking up her and Kira’s date with a baseball bat and a lot of nasty words she had slept well.
She had breakfast with the family and Angie took her assignments she had finished with her to drop them at her classes which was nice and her dad was getting ready to take some clients out to some fishing lodge place with the float plane.
She started the dishes and her mom was making herself another coffee for the road and Emily turned around and leaned against the sink.
“Mom…?”
“Yes honey?”
“I think I might be a lesbian.”
“………………………”
“Mom?”
“………………………”
“Mom…..?”
“I…I heard you….are you sure?”
“Kind of….there’s this girl that I really like.”
“Oh….”
“Yeah….”
“Are you sure?”
“No…we’ve never done anything not even like the light stuff but we’ve both kind of said that we’ve liked each other.”
“Oh…”
“Mom?”
“Yes Emily?”
“Are you okay?”
“No…but…but I will be…I’ll try to give this a chance.”
“You will?”
Her mom looked at her and she was upset Emily could just tell by the color and the expression on her face but her eyes were teary too. “Yes baby I will, I reacted so badly when all this CAIS stuff started and I shouldn’t have.”
“Okay….I love you mom.”
Her mother came over and hugged her tightly. “I love you too Emily. And thanks for telling me…like before you and this girl got started…It’ll take time to get used to.”
“I know mom, for me too…heck I never planned any of this.”
They hugged and her mom left and made her lock the doors again. Emily couldn’t help a bit of a cry as she did the dishes. She knew she was lucky as far as reactions went and stuff but it was till sort of scary and there was still the fact that as time went on her mom still might not be good with it.
And then there was how she acted before.
She wiped her eyes and she went online again this time trying to find out more stuff about her father. This time she remembered that Seattle was in Washington State and not in Oregon.
It took her a lot of time looking and going over the things that she had looked up before and it still led up to nothing really there were little snippets of the stuff she had already had learned but that was it.
She’s even logged into a genealogy site to try and research his side of the family which was interesting she had some Dutch and some Scottish in her family who had come out this way in the western expansion and worked as farmers and ranchers and in some of the mines.
She was actually getting into it and she was reading in on one of her great uncles that was a WW2 pilot that had come back from the war to start a crop dusting company when she saw a tag pop up from and Erica Stevens. Emily logged into the chat function and sent her a poke.
[Hello Erika?]
[Yes?]
[I’m Emily.]
[Hi Emily nice to meet you.]
[Likewise, it’s weird to meet family here that I don’t know.]
[Not really, I’ve met some other’s distant relatives and things.]
[Oh, it’s my first time on this thing.]
[I’m on here a lot looking up things, or trying to.]
[School project?]
[No, looking up names and then trying to backtrack my medical history.]
[Oh, wow I should have thought of that.]
[Oh?]
[My dad bailed out when I was little and split, I’m here looking for clues.]
[Oh…that sucks sorry.]
[It’s okay, I’m used to it but I have a sort of condition that it would really help if I knew more on.]
[Me too.]
[Looking for a donor…lol.]
[…Yes.]
[Eep, shit sorry!!!]
[……….Rotfl!]
[Bitch you were lying!]
[You started it making the joke.]
[Okay, okay so why are you looking for medical stuff?]
[Genetic condition….]
[Really?]
[Yeah…I’m a girl only I’m not.]
[……………..holy shit….]
[PAIS…I don’t process my guy stuff right and I’m not a girl and stuff but I’ve never ever felt right with the guy bits.]
[It might run in the family.]
[Huh?]
[I’m XY CAIS.]
[Whoa…]
[Yeah.]
[You on Facebook?]
[Yeah.]
[Switch over?]
[Okay.]
They both ended up switching over and she sort of felt a kinship to Erika especially after seeing her pictures. Before getting made up she looked like a freckly but very pretty and femme boy and just with her regular make up she didn’t just pass but she was pretty.
They talked and chatted trading stories and Erika lived out on the East coast in Rhode Island and was twenty three and going to community college while trying to transition.
There was a lot different with their situations but there was a lot there Emily just identified with and everything.
Then Erika had an idea.
“You family runs a business right?”
“Yeah?”
“If you can find your dad’s social security number then you could do a background check on him like for his record of employment maybe and that might spit out some of his addresses or the places that he’s worked.”
“I can do that?”
“Maybe I don’t know but you’d need his social first and it might work? Hey even if you got just a list of past employers you could call them for his mailing addy and stuff.”
“Okay, I’ll try that.”
“Cool.”
“No meeting you was very cool, please let’s keep in touch?”
“I’d really like that and hey maybe if your family’s good with it I might hop out there when I get sick of here.”
“That’d be cool.”
They logged off and she heard a car pulling up and saw Matt pulling in with Angie and a quick look showed she’d spent most of the day talking with Erika. She unlocked the doors and opened them and looked at her little sister who looked all too pleased that she was in the car with Matt.
Angie pretty much strutted herself inside and Emily looked at Matt who came up to the deck.
“Hey, how are you holding up?”
“Good, I’m okay how about you?’
“Three days detention for mostly not getting the faculty involved.”
“That’s not fair.”
He smiled and shrugged. “It’s actually pretty fair considering the violence and stuff. It could have been worse with the schools policies.”
“Yeah well they didn’t stop Jack.”
“No, or Trent or some of the others in that whole bunch.”
“Whole bunch?”
“Teananderthals. Red-necks, the whole anti-gay anti women pro-job anti-Obama racist bigoted bunch.”
“Oh…you mean most of town.”
He shook his head. “No not really….well yeah but we’re trying to make it better.”
“We?”
“I’m into the LGBT rights and stuff.”
“You’re gay?”
“No…but some of my friends are and I stick by the people I care about not their sexual orientation or gender identity.”
“Wow…”
“Not really Em, it’s actually about 80/20 for in school.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, we’re the next generation and I don’t know about my friends but I’m already tired of the bullshit.”
Emily nodded. “Me too.”
Matt nodded. “That bullshit these days sometimes equals bullets.”
Emily nodded. “People with no hope and nothing to live for generally don’t have anything to lose when they hit the breaking point.”
Matt nodded. “I guess I have a different perspective on it my dad’s older sister was in the Kent shooting.”
“Oh…? I don’t know that one.”
“Happened a long time ago but dad’s been on the whole topic ever since.”
“Cool though it’d be hard sometimes right?”
“Yeah but just watching the news and I get it.”
“I don’t watch the news too depressing.”
“Yeah but I can’t help it. I need to see and hear the BS out there.”
“You’re smarter than the average jock Matt?”
“Well gee ummmm golly thanks.”
She laughed. “Sorry it’s just y’know the stereotype. Thanks for bringing Angie back even though she was way too happy about being in the car with you.”
“No problem, I was actually wanting to talk to you.”
“You were?”
“Yeah, I’d like to actually ask you a favor?”
“Uhm me?”
“Yeah, you. I saw the way that you pinballed off the wall to get away from Trent and jack and I was wondering if you think that you’d be interested in playing lacrosse?”
“Lacrosse? But there isn’t a girl’s team.”
“Nope but the team has an opening as of last week since Craig Phillips broke his leg.”
“And you want me to play?”
“I was thinking about it. Emily you’ve done track, you can run and jump and stuff and that showed me you’re really agile and there’s no guys that have tried out that are any good. The guys that could fill in are all in other sports and can’t fit the time in.”
“So you ask any of the other girls?”
“No, but I will…I’ll talk to the coach about try outs for the girls.”
“Can we play?”
“There’s nothing in the rules that says a girl can’t. And you’re a sub player so it’d been likely more okay or they’d have to forfeit the season.”
“But why you? You’re not on the team?”
“Student council.” He smiled.
Emily thought about it and there was an odd sort of appeal to it and it might even maybe just be like the thing that gave her this whole cushion when she might eventually come out.
“Okay…you get some other girls to try out and get the coach and the team on board and I’ll do it.”
“Cool thanks.”
“Uhm Matt?”
“Yeah?”
“How the heck do you play it anyhow?”
Matt smiled at her. “I just so happened to have a ball and some sticks.”
X-Why-Me…Chapter 12
Chapter 12
Emily ran and ran and ran trying to get her racket under the ball before it was passed to the guy in the other team. She jumped up a little and she snagged the ball out of the air and with a tennis grunt she whipped in back towards her team mates.
Yes she had joined the boy’s lacrosse team.
That had been as much a shock to her mother as her coming out to her had been and she wasn’t exactly "for" her doing something that was so “butch.”
But to Emily this was fun. She’d never been a girly girl not in her head she liked sports and doing stuff like that and part of her did wonder if it was part of her being XY but not at the same time.
She was sort of just adjusting to everything. Since she no longer had the ball she wasn’t really afraid of them hitting her and recent experience said that they would try when she did have the ball. They shot her some dirty looks as they re-routed and chased after Lee who she had passed the ball to and she ran after them trying to be someone to pass to if needed again.
She was actually pretty good like Matt had said and she was pretty good on the field from when she used to run track.
And her heart skipped a little beat when she heard Kira cheering for her.
Those loud finger whistles and “Yeah way to go Emily!”
She had come out to her family and Kira had said how much she had really, really liked her and after she had come back to school things had sort of started. They still ate together at lunch and she still shared a bus seat with her and they held hands there on the bus sometimes at first where no one could see them.
Then it was afterschool stuff…since she had joined the team she had afterschool practices getting taught and up to speed and everything so she could play and that usually carried her there past the time that the buses ran so she’d go over town and help out at the diner.
That was an awesome two weeks…it wasn’t open then and they were helping with everything but when they weren’t needed they found a place and hung out and talked and listened to music or did homework and just like in one of those teen novels it was during homework when she had just about all the pent up feelings that she could stand and she had kissed Kira.
A real kiss too…fully on the lips and Kira was so sexy and soft and those full plump lips and just everything made her all gooey and wet inside and even eventually through her panties some nights when the kissing led to touching.
It was and still was over the shirt touching but Kira had such a nice full curve bum and those amazing breasts that even through her shirt or shirts and bra were just amazing…and she was pretty sure she drove Kira into that inhale…inhale…sigh with a shudder of having an orgasm in her panties.
Emily doing that to a girl as sexy and hot and amazing as Kira was so much a turn on that she had gotten very, very familiar with masturbation.
Mostly in the shower or her bath though she took a beach towel to her at nights and there were some nights where she’d roll over and bite into her pillow as she arched into her mattress pushing her breasts into the bed and hunched herself up and slid a hand into her sex and didn’t stop until she was so sated and tired that she couldn’t hold her hips up off the bed.
The hormones were really starting to kick in too. She’d been on them for just a little while before the attack and now they were hitting her really hard. Aching joints and really sore and sensitive and aching breasts that nearly drove her insane and she was craving foods too. Apples were a seriously craving and so was milk anything and protein too, she liked meat well enough or as well as any other girl usually did but lately she would find herself drooling at the smell of a good hamburger.
But all of that was paling in comparison to the way that she would get so horny that she thought that she’d go mad some nights.
The thought of Kira and hot amazing she was…it didn’t take much.
Like seeing Kira today at the game.
She looked great as usual, Kira used to model and it showed she might not dress like rich but she always looked good.
Country-rock style cowboy hat on and a cropped top with this elastic bottom that completely hugged and framed her amazing ripe lush full breasts and at the same time prevented trashy side and under boob stuff and showed off her navel.
And she was in such…good shape…not ripped but you could just see maybe the hint of ab definition on Kira so she had this yummy flat tummy that Emily so wanted to touch and taste…
They the faded designed hip hugging low cut jeans set off with a local styled cowboy/girl tooled leather belt and an oval belt buckle to. There were local bits of stuff slowly creeping into Kira’s wardrobe and she wore them so much better than the girls around her did.
And those Shakira…hips don’t lie hips of hers.
And the high top city styled Nike women’s shoes that still sort of screamed L.A. Leather jacket and movie starlet blonde long and beautiful hair Kira was still the bomb here at school and slowly winning was people over.
That was the girl whistling and screaming and even jumping and bouncing cheering her on.
There were some looks at that still.
People were assuming things still.
But this time they were actually true.
“Emmy!”
Lee passed to Roy and Roy passed it back to her and she caught it getting passed her little lump of fear. Emily actually feared flubbing a catch or a pass or a throw more than a lacrosse hit.
There were some stereotypes about being a girl that she really wanted to avoid. She didn’t even worry about scoring too much…she’d take a shot and hey the two points she’d scored in eight games was awesome. She just didn’t want to have some of the people that had been critical of this and her to point to her screwing up and saying. “There…see.”
And there were a few…a couple of the really old faculty that were near retirement and kept saying that boys should be boys and girls should be girls and we all about wanting the whole country to revert to the 1950’s.
A back pass is a common thing they do it often in sports and she caught the pass and ran and looked for her opening and dodged through the guard of one of the guys on the other team until she saw that Alex was open and she whipped the stick hard and set the ball to him and he caught it and did this spinning thing he did where he kept up the momentum of the catch and he sent it almost all the way across the field to Lee who was in position by now and he did a catch and snap-shot into the goal.
Whistles blew and cheers and the guy she slipped past cross checked her down into the field getting her even more bruised and muddy.
“Whoops sorry I couldn’t stop before the ref blew.” He didn’t look sorry and the coach was yelling at the reff about and illegal check and she waved it off.
This happened to players all the time. She was given the ball at the new mark for the foul and she looked at the guys who nodded to her and she left her mark and started to jog it in as far as she could before they came at her and she hop passed it to Alex as he ran by her and they went after him like a bunch of dogs and she took a hard bracing breath and she sprinted down the field and across going for the far side.
She was glad the she had taken track but Emily was also thinking about taking up training jogging again.
It was the boys on the boys again as they passed and blocked and she slowed to a light jog and waited for the ball and Lee passing it her way with one of his long bomb passes another prayer and a lump in her throat and she missed the pass by about four inches and it hit the ground and bounced and she scrambled to recover the ball and two of their player came at her and she had just gotten the ball when they had gotten to her.
The first hit was the worst a cross check to her torso and mashed her aching sensitive breasts into her padding with sharp sudden force and the other check hit her side and drove her to the grass.
She just laid there breathing a second and she heard Matt yelling from the side lines. “C’mon Em! Just like in the Robin Hood movie.”
She didn’t get it….but got up and yelled at him annoyed and confused. “What!? Which one!?”
“Costner’s!”
“What does that have to do with this!?”
He gestured upwards with his hand. “Get up, move faster…” Like Morgan Friedman’s character did at the river seen with the staff fight.
She shoved off the ground rolling her eyes at him and gave him her middle finger as she ran passed to catch up with the others who were all the way down their end getting closer to their goal.
Kira screamed cheerfully and whistled once she was up and that made her smile and when she ran passed Kira…
Kira mouthed to her…
I love you…
Emily felt something jump inside and while she knew it wasn’t like the whole big get married I’ll love you forever love it was still.
It was someone other than her family saying that to her and she felt a second wind kick up in her and she ran faster back into the game.
…………………………. It had been a really hard game and she hadn’t scored a single point but she passed the ball decently had been hit three times and had an interception. Lee had carried the game scoring them the win by a single goal and Emily was happy…she was dirty, bruised but she was tired and happy.
She took the cold bottle of water from Kira in the changing room and drained it fast enough that the water spilled down out of the edges of her mouth.
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome you were great out there.”
“I don’t know about great but I didn’t mess up and just playing is better than the team having to forfeit the season.”
“Well I thought you were awesome.”
She blushed a little. “Thanks Kira the cheering helped.”
Kira grinned. “Well I can’t say doing the cheer thing hadn’t crossed my mind before.”
“Really you could y’know.”
“Not that interested besides I only really like cheering for you.”
Emily stepped closer and pushed up on her toes and gave Kira a light kiss which turned heavier and heavier.
They started touching too and Emily felt herself get achy and hot and turned on in a very short time and she pulled away hesitantly. “I’m…I’m a mess…”
“Yeah you are, you also might have to wash your stuff like three times just to get all of the grass stains and the sod out.”
Emily nodded and started to get undressed and winced just trying to get her jersey off until Kira helped her and then Kira winced. “Ow…..bruises…”
Emily looked down and there were a lot of little bruise everywhere but several good sized ones peeking from around the edges of her sports bra. “Gah…oh this is going to suck.”
Kira said really shy softly. “Well…it could…” And bit her lip…but the look in her eyes.
“I’m not sure I’m ready for sex…Kira…”
“No…not sex…I’m…I’m not ready either just…something else…some tenderness?”
“Tenderness?”
Kira nodded.
Emily bit her lip thinking about it then nodded. “Help me get out of these pads?”
It was slow and it was quiet in the changing room and Kira unhooked the pads bit by bit stopping only between these sexy slow deep leaning down kisses.
Kisses with shivers as Emily reached up and took off her hat and ran her fingers through Kira’s hair or reached out and cradled Kira’s large breasts in her hands…a little squeeze through the shirt and the bra…tracing a thumb over her nipples raise them up and made them so perfect and pointy through the shirt.
And it was so like some blonde beautiful sexy goddess taking of the armor of some lady knight.
X-rated Marion Zimmer Bradley….Sword and Sorceress…
Very Mercedes Lackey…
Two people, two women in front of each other young and shy yet light touches, shy caresses as one slowly releases the warrioress from her armor and the other releases her sweet muse from her trappings…
Armor…pads…sports bra.
Leather jacket…Cropped sports top…VS angels’ collection lace pink bra.
Kira sat down on the bench straddling it and she leaned in and kissed Emily deeply and sweetly.
Emily turned her body and straddled the bench and scooted close to Kira and kissed her back…long and deep and over and over again and each sort of melting and leaning into the kissing until their breasts just touched…just at first and cool air and passion aroused and that sensation of the sweetest softest skin just touching together so..so…
So featherlight erotica.
Each one falling deeper and deeper into the kiss and their sexual natures getting tease by that whisper kiss of nipple to breast and breast to nipple and nipple to nipple until they moved first one then the other with aroused and shaking hands and eyes filled with wonder and wide with excitement and hope and fear…
Longing…as Kira’s almost hot to too hot touch settled onto Emilie’s skin.
(Triple inhale gasp.) “Kira…”
“Oh…Emily...”
Kira’s smooth hot silken touch hands glided over Emily’s almost rebudding breasts soothing and intoxicatingly erotic at the same time. Long delicate fingers touching her in ways that sent such powerful sensations through her body into her spine and up into her brain…into her mind like an unlocking key to her new sexual consciousness.
And down, down, down lighting this amazing fire inside of her loins…hot dampness and herself inside herself hardening with need.
It hurt so good.
And the feeling as Emily touched Kira’s tanned perfect skin, those lush taut amazing breasts actually shivered a little in her hands as the muscles in Kira’s torso twitched involuntarily matching with the hardening and stiffening nipple and the widening waking of all those nerves and blood vessels in her aurelae.
Hot silken touches to both, tenderness and contact…real person to person…another person touch where it’s intimate, caring wishing only good only pleasure and softness and those passionate honey tears.
Pads of fingers, the lifting of heft and weight from someone so gentle.
The sexy tiny scrape not scrape on the touch of fingernail.
Breaking from kisses to dip down and see her body tip back in an arch offering the sex sweet skin, the sexy lovely dream of the taste of her skin.
Emily cried…tears that she could explain as she gasped…sucked air… “Kira, Kira, Kira…oh it’s happening…” her hips rolled pressing herself into the bench with need…so hard, so wet, so aching and only rolling and grinding her hips was even coming close to touching on what she needed.
So hard she felt herself peeking through her folds and then slipping back in as she pushed her pelvis in against the wood.
Until…
Emily reached up in abandon and slide the fingers of both hands into Kira’s hair and shoved her chest into her wanting asking pleading.
“More…more, please don’t stop…please, please Kira…Uhn…Kira…don’t stop…”
She pulled Kira up as she lost control and shuddered and pressed her mount to the bench and crossed her legs beneath it to hold onto the wood with a death grip.
Hip roll…press…mini-roll after roll and shuddering and she had to kiss her…had to…kiss her and slipped her tongue in passed Kira’s plumb sweet sexy lips until she found her tongue there and slid hers around her’s over and under and back and forth a stabbing into her caress with each shuddering thrust her body made into the wood until she couldn’t breath.
She broke the kiss but didn’t move and pressed her fact to Kira’s and just breathed and panted as she stared into those amazing eyes.
Tears slipped down Kira’s passion glistening face and she was panting too her eyes wide and just glowing with this flush under her skin as well.
Emily’s hands slip out of Kira’s scalp and combed through it and slid down to the small of her back and they kissed again.
Just sweet again and over and over slow and beautiful as they held each other with real partner and lover and beloved intimacy breast to breast contact.
“Emmy…”
“Hmm…”
“That was beautiful… (Sniffle.)”
“Are you okay?”
“Yes…it’s never been like that…it’s never felt like this before.”
“Well…me neither…”
“But you’re a virgin…(Sniffle.)”
“If it’s never been like this then so were you right?”
Kira nodded and stared deeply into her eyes and her cool sweet princess next door looked so different like this.
Scared, hopeful, vulnerable.
“Emmy…I think I’m falling for you really hard.”
“Me too…”
There was a female cough and they jerked and eeped. Emily saw her mom there staring at the both of them a sort of semi amused and sort of angry and a pretty serious look over all of it.
“Good…then maybe since you’re definitely a lesbian Em you could invite your girlfriend over to the house for us to get to know her.”
“Mom…..”
“You were taking a lot longer than before young lady so I came to see if you needed any help. How about you get cleaned up and showered and changed and you can join Kira? Is it? And me then.”
“………………okay….”
“Good, we’ll have supper at the diner tonight I think….Kira?” That last part was this whole parental come with me tone.
“Yes ma’am?” (Sniffle.)
“Relax, get dressed though I’m not going to kill you.”
“Okay…”
Kira looked at Emily biting her lip and giving her this help me look.
Emily sat up and kissed her in front of her mom…well what was done was already done as far as that went. “I won’t be long.”
Kira nodded and slide her bra on fast and the top as she went outside with Emily’s mother.
Emily stared at the door.
This would have to be one of the quickest showers of her life.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 13
She pulled Kira up as she lost control and shuddered and pressed her mound to the bench and crossed her legs beneath it to hold onto the wood with a death grip.
Hip roll…press…mini-roll after roll and shuddering and she had to kiss her…had to…kiss her and slipped her tongue in passed Kira’s plump sweet sexy lips until she found her tongue there and slid hers around her’s over and under and back and forth a stabbing into her caress with each shuddering thrust her body made into the wood until she couldn’t breath.
She broke the kiss but didn’t move and pressed her fact to Kira’s and just breathed and panted as she stared into those amazing eyes.
……….
“Good…then maybe since you’re definitely a lesbian Em you could invite your girlfriend over to the house for us to get to know her.”
“Mom…..”
“You were taking a lot longer than before young lady so I came to see if you needed any help. How about you get cleaned up and showered and changed and you can join Kira? Is it? And me then.”
“………………okay….”
“Good, we’ll have supper at the diner tonight I think….Kira?” That last part was this whole parental come with me tone.
“Yes ma’am?” (Sniffle.)
Chapter 13
Emily’s mind raced and raced but it was also kind of like spinning car tires on wet grass. Well wet something else really and she eased off of the bench still sore but way more wobble leggedly and she headed to the shower stall and turned the water on.
Just the cold making her Eeep! And gasp for breath and as unlady like as it was she moved her body so that the really cold water was falling on her vagina first in an attempt to shock the heat inside of her down to where she could think.
The cold was working but the hard little streams of water were not as her body adjusted to the chill.
She turned the hot water on and she stepped under in and she grabbed her poof and her body wash and lathered up and washed which just led to her mind making her hands doing things that she wanted to keep doing and to touch Kira and have Kira touch her until she rested under the spray of the water her forehead pressed to the tiles and her feet squared and open and Emily slid her hand down to her sexy.
She knew she shouldn’t be doing this…
Her mom and Kira could be right outside in the hall…
Oh…they could be right out in the hall.
Kira could be right out there in the hall.
Emily used the sudsy slickness to rub her hand, the cleft from her fingers makings these little bumpy textured furoughs for her sensitive labia and her protruding tip of her clitty.
Jilling off, rubbing one out…dipping the slick…
She rode her palm and moaned and rode her fingers even harder as she curled them inwards and sank her middle and ring finger into her pussy and her middle finger at as far as she could reach in bottomed out and with those two fingers filling her tight little XY-box… Okay she snorted at thinking that…a sort of self twisted inside joke…but her clit was right in between the two fingers as she moaned as quiet as she could under the shower fingering her need out finishing with her closing those two fingers on her clit harder until the gripped and still moved her wrist and her hips and she literally jerked off her Jill as close to a guy as she could get.
Seeing stars wasn’t even enough to describe it when she got off and needed to thump the wall with the side of her fist and then hang onto the shower neck to stand on her feet.
It took a few minutes to get her breath and she turned the hot water off again to shock herself and rinse off the suds and soap.
Emily took her time getting dressed with all the bruises from the game and went with soft yoga pants and a thin tee-shirt under her spare in class team jersey and she slipped some flats on and headed outside after getting all of her gear.
Kira wasn’t there or her mom in the hall and she got some friendly greeting from the other players and their girlfriends and family and saw both of them waiting for her in the car.
Kira got out and sort of got a look from her mom as she went and she took Emily’s gear and told/asked Emily’s mom. “Could you pop the trunk please?’
There was a look back in the mirror, look ahead at Em’s mom momentary mom vs. girlfriend showdown there.
It happened pretty fast but it definitely happened.
Emily wasn’t sure how to take that…or act with that, it’s her mom who’s far from perfect but still her mom and then there’s Kira…sort of girlfriend though not official and not perfect either most likely and there’s that little thing already there.
She was almost tempted to smile at it.
In a regular situation this could be the same thing with her boyfriend and her dad.
She let Kira take her stuff and she opened the back door for her like a…is it being a lady to open a door for a girl?
In any event it was likely a better idea for her to sit in the front with her mom giving the two of them and buffer between them for the seats. Kira smiled and slid into the seat all very lady like and Emily did that bite both her lips smile thing as she closed the door for her like a mannerly guy would.
Her mom huffed a little.
Emily got into the car and her mom drove not too fast but still kind of determined through town until she got to Kira’s family diner and found a place to park and they all went inside. She was pretty sure that her mom had a sort of frown on her face when Kira opened the door for her.
The place was pretty busy with it being one of the new places in town there was a sort of bright and shiny new place factor going on and she smiled at how many people were there eating.
It wasn’t all the fancy California food that so many people were expecting. It was well for one there was an order of meatloaf that went by that looked really good with some veggies and what looked like mashed potatoes.
They looked for a booth and had to settle for the counter to wait and Kira went out back and came out wearing an apron around her waist and a yellow tee-shirt with the logo yellow ribbon diner printed on the front and on the back support our troops.
All the staff were wearing them and it was showing the locals more than they thought. Emily nodded personally she thought it was smart and they did move back here onto a family owed farm so they’d like have roots here one way or another and family in the service.
It’s the mid-west if you don’t have family serving or have served you know at least a dozen families that do.
They waited awhile and her mom was looking over the menu in an almost studied way until Kira’s mom was able to come over.
“Hey what can I get you girls?”
Emily’s mom looked at her. “A place to talk we really have to talk about our girls.”
She blinked. “Okay what happened?’
Emily’s mom shook her head. “Not here.”
“Oh…”
“Yes Oh you don’t know this town can we talk in private?”
“Come on back then, we can talk while I’m working.”
“This is serious maybe we’ll come back; I want your attention about this.”
Kira’s mom looked at Emily’s mom. “I already know and you can come back out back and we can talk.”
Emily looked at her mother who had her lips pursed and stared at Kira’s mother who shrugged and turned around and left just like Kira would with her “it’s not all that” kind of attitude.
“Okay…Emily lets go with.”
Rough times or not Emily could tell her mom’s inner cheerleader wasn’t happy and not being in charge.
Old habits really and she was sort of being out cheerleaded since Kira’s mom so fit the bill too.
They headed out back and Kira’s dad wasn’t there and Kira’s mom went back to cooking and gestured to this small table up against the wall with some things on it but there were two folding chairs. They took a seat and Emily’s mom looked over and said.
“I caught Kira and Emily right on the verge of having sex.”
Kira’s mom nodded. “They’ve been co-crushing ever since they met.”
“They’re girls…they were in the locker room, anyone could have walked in on them.”
“Well that’s true but Kira’s still saving up for a car.”
“No, you’re missing the point they’re lesbians.”
“And…?”
“Look where you come from out there it might be all find and dandy to have your kid be gay but here that’s a license for them to get hassled and attacked and beaten up.”
“That’s illegal, and if they try something here we’ll fight it.”
“Oh you’ll fight it, just like that huh?”
“My daughter’s a lesbian…not exactly the first time that we’ve had to deal with bigots and haters we had to deal with them back in California too.”
“Really?” Her tone a bit sarcastic.
“Oh, you have no idea what we’ve been through. California isn’t just actors and surfers and hippies you can find lots of hate filled people there just as much as you can find them here and we’ll deal.”
“You’ll deal?” More sarcasm. “Okay you might have some haters but here being gay can get you lynched.”
Kira’s mom turned to Emily’s mom looking both mad and really hurting and there were tears there starting. “We’ll deal because we don’t have a choice…we don’t have anywhere else to go…we lost everything and this… (She gestured around.)…this put us in a big whole as it is…This is it this is home now and I have a daughter that needs to be who she is because the last time we went with her hiding it…it almost killed her.”
Emily’s mother just looked at Kira’s and blinked a few times. “I…I didn’t know…I’m sorry.”
Emily got up and went out front to the main part of the diner and she looked for Kira who was smiling and taking peoples orders and looked just amazing and sunny and beautiful…had she done something like trying to kill herself.
Not this time, no…hell no.
She bit her lip and she coughed really loudly. “Excuse me, everyone excuse me I need to say something okay.”
Everyone sort of stopped and looked at her. She felt both of the moms’s coming from out back and she took a few more steps ahead.
“Look, I just found this out about me and I’m as new to this news as you all are hearing it but I figure people will talk and people will hate or not so I might as well just say it to you all and let the shit fly were it goes.”
Emily’s mom squeaked out. “Emily language!” which made people chuckle a little.
She took a breath. “I’m gay, I’m a lesbian and I like girls. Well actually I like a certain girl a whole lot and I think she’s amazing. It was all going to come out anyway and I’m not going to sneak around…what’s the point these days? Thanks…?”
She took a few steps over to where Kira was staring at her in open shock like this was really the last thing she was expecting and she sort of straightened up from where she was leaning over taking someone’s order and shyly bit her lip in this sexy way and Emily went right up and stood on her tip toes and kissed Kira long and deep and slowly pressing herself close and tight to her.
It was almost pin drop quiet except for the sounds of the kitchen going on and then the scrap of a few chairs and close to five people left…some tossing money down angrily and some left not even paying.
Kira and Emily broke the kiss and stood there together kind of like each was holding the other protectively and looked the ones that stayed in their eyes and it sort of felt like a long time until one of the men at the counter asked for a refill of his coffee and like a switch everything went back to normal again.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 14
Chapter 14
“You’ll deal?” More sarcasm. “Okay you might have some haters but here being gay can get you lynched.”
Kira’s mom turned to Emily’s mom looking both mad and really hurting and there were tears there starting. “We’ll deal because we don’t have a choice…we don’t have anywhere else to go…we lost everything and this… (She gestured around.)…this put us in a big whole as it is…This is it this is home now and I have a daughter that needs to be who she is because the last time we went with her hiding it…it almost killed her.”
Emily got up and went out front to the main part of the diner and she looked for Kira who was smiling and taking peoples orders and looked just amazing and sunny and beautiful…had she done something like trying to kill herself.
Not this time, no…hell no.
She bit her lip and she coughed really loudly. “Excuse me, everyone excuse me I need to say something okay.”
Everyone sort of stopped and looked at her. She felt both of the mom’s coming from out back and she took a few more steps ahead.
“Look, I just found this out about me and I’m as new to this news as you all are hearing it but I figure people will talk and people will hate or not so I might as well just say it to you all and let the shit fly where it goes.”
Emily’s mom squeaked out. “Emily language!” which made people chuckle a little.
She took a breath. “I’m gay, I’m a lesbian and I like girls. Well actually I like a certain girl a whole lot and I think she’s amazing. It was all going to come out anyway and I’m not going to sneak around…what’s the point these days? Thanks…?”
She took a few steps over to where Kira was staring at her in open shock like this was really the last thing she was expecting and she sort of straightened up from where she was leaning over taking someone’s order and shyly bit her lip in this sexy way and Emily went right up and stood on her tip toes and kissed Kira long and deep and slowly pressing herself close and tight to her.
*And Now…………..
It had seemed pretty tense with the people leaving and then it was sort of anticlimactic as things sort of just went back to normal and Emily pulled back from the kiss with Kira with a smile on her face. Kira was still staring at her looking very shocked but also…well her nipples were winning the fight with her bra and to Emily it looked amazing.
And it so felt like someone had lifted a weight off of her shoulders too. Or maybe that she had dumped all of the baggage about being gay?
Her mother was there right beside her and took Emily by the arm. “We’re going home.”
“Mom…”
“No, you have no idea Emily.”
“I’m from this town mom, I know what I did.”
Her voice got quiet. “We have to go, you think you know but you really, really don’t Emily you’ve never been on this side of things here in town.”
“But if I run from this mom they win.”
“No if they beat you half to death they win.”
“Mom…”
“No.”
They locked eyes and Emily was surprised to see the look that was there in her mom’s eyes. It wasn’t the anger that she had seen there before like from when she had caught them in the locker room it was fear.
Her mother was scared for her.
She kind of knew that things had go wrong several times with things in her mom’s life but the look that was there had her actually feeling the hairs sort of standing up now on the back of her neck.
“Okay…okay…I’ll go.” She pulled her arm away and went over to Kira.
She slipped her hands into Kira’s and she bit her lip looking at her. “My mom’s freaked out at what happened did I just screw things up?”
Kira shrugged. “I couldn’t stay in the closet forever either sooner or later things would happen…people are too damned nosey and wouldn’t let it go even if they didn’t have proof.”
Emily nodded. “I have to go so mom doesn’t stroke out or something but call me later?’
“Definitely…and for the record I did love what you did.” Kira was looking at her in this way that felt so good…it was this kind of sweet and yet she could tell that she was happy too and sort of proud of her?
She felt like a boy that did something really cool that made his girl sparkle. It was a really damned nice way to feel.
And it was Kira, Kira deserved better than to be treated the way that she had in the past.
They kissed again and it was so tempting to keep going and going because it felt so good and Kira tasted so good and her hands ached to just reach out and touch her, feel her skin and her curves but that might be definitely pushing it.
He mom coughed pointedly several times until they broke the kiss and her mom took her arm again and led her outside to the car.
Emily blinked as her mom turned them both back around and back into the diner.
“Mom what?”
“We’re just going to stay here until the police arrive.”
“Police?”
Emily went to the diner door and looked around not seeing anything out of the ordinary except for.
Someone had already keyed the car and at least one of the car tires was slashed from what she could see.
“It had to be one of the ones that left here mom.”
“Emily we can’t say who did it or why, we have no proof.”
“Mom it was like ten minutes ago, c’mon.”
Her mom looked at her but pulled her over quietly. “We have zero proof right now Em, and if we go around saying stuff like that no matter how much it makes sense that’s us…us picking a fight with them.”
“That’s….”
“That’s how we used to do things Emily.”
“You used to?”
“Em, I was a real bitch back in high school and even after that until I was knocked down a few dozen pegs by life but when I was your age until twenty five or so I was a raging bitch.”
“Mom!” She sort of knew it but she wasn’t prepared to hear her say that.
“I was popular and I was good looking and I knew it and I and most of my friends were bullies Emily. We’d work someone that we decided we didn’t like until they were the ones reacting and then we could point the finger at them and say they were causing all they trouble. They will keep doing this too they’ll want us to react so they can beat of their drums and drive us into doing something stupid.”
Emily looked at her mom in shock while her mom was talking to the town police on her cell-phone.
It was a tense few minutes with Kira hanging close to Emily and Kira’s mom was there too with things having slowed down some more as another three customers had paid and left.
Emily was hunched with her hands in her pockets leaning on Kira. “I thought I was doing the right thing…but.”
“Em it was going to come anyway, you’re right we might as well face it.” Kira gave her one of those amazing smiles of hers and slipped from beside her to behind Emily and hugged her close pressing into her.
Emily had to admit that aside from the semi-erotic feelings that were there from that it was extremely comforting to be held by a girl like Kira.
It took another twenty minutes for the police to arrive and while Emily hadn’t had a lot of contact with them before this she wasn’t too impressed with them showing up this late and the very pork rind friendly appearance of the lone officer that showed up.
He got out of his patrol car and walked around their car looking at things and then he came into the diner. He was looking instantly at Emily and Kira and he had a scowl on his face.
Her mom stepped in front of him and they started talking and then Kira’s mother asked him to go out back with her. Emily’s mother went with the two out back looking steamed.
Emily didn’t know what was going on but ten minutes later he came out with a cd case and he was looking pissed off and was talking on his shoulder mic for his radio and got into his car and pulled off pretty fast.
Emily saw her mom come out looking a little red faced from likely being angry and a little smug too. She went over to the counter beside the girls and she ordered a couple of milkshakes.
“Mom?”
“Ted’s pissed that he has to go and do his job.”
“Huh?”
“The diner has video cameras front and side and back.”
Kira slipped behind the counter and started making the milkshakes. “We learned the lesson the hard way from back in California, we even have them in here and at home.” She said quietly.
Emily looked at her mom. “So they saw who did it?”
Her mom nodded. “Ruth Bingham and her boyfriend.”
“Are we pressing charges?”
“Damned right we are, no one messes with my daughter and gets away with it.”
Kira set the two milkshakes in front of them and Emily took hers and took a sip, the chocolate was more than welcome at the moment. “Thanks Mom.” She set her shake down and hugged her tight.
It was really pretty cool how protective she was being.
“It’s going to get worse kiddo.”
“I can handle it I’m your daughter.”
Her mom just looked at her pretty deeply. “Actually you remind me of your father.”
“Really?”
That was the first time that she had ever really mentioned it save for that’s where she got her hair color and her height from.
“Yeah…definitely.”
X-Why-Me... Chapter 15
Chapter 15
It took awhile before things got interesting with things being pretty heated as the fat cop showed only he had with him two other cops and the Sheriff.
Okay Emily thought the Sheriff looked like he knew what was going on and he looked more capable than the other guys. He was younger too by at least between ten to twenty years too depending on what cop you compared him too and he didn’t look like a foot chase would be cause for him radioing 911.
He was taking pictures and then he was looking at something on a computer tablet before coming in.
He talked to her mom.
She called him Stone.
Okay Stone as a first name was…
Holy shit she thought he looked like her sister.
She watched as they talked and she looked at her mom and it was a close vibe but as far as she could tell it wasn’t an I’ve slept with him/her kind of vibe between the two of them.
He left after the local Budget renta-car was there with a car for them to use while their car was taken and towed to their house.
“Mom?”
“Yes honey?”
“Uhm why aren’t we using the garage?”
“Mr. Peter’s said that he’s too bust to change out our tires.”
“Oh but there’s…oh…”
Her mother nodded. “It travels faster than in my day though.”
Emily looked at her. “It’s likely all over Facebook and Twitter.”
“It just happened?”
“Mom, it takes no time these days.”
“Yes technology’s just great…” he mother frowned as they drove following the wrecker and the sheriff.
“Mom?”
“Yes Em?”
“The sheriff…he looks like Angie.”
“He’s her uncle.”
“I’ve never seen him come over.”
Her mother looked over at her a moment and there was a bit of that sad kind of look she’d get sometimes there.
“I wasn’t exactly welcome and I’m still not where Angie’s father’s concerned. I was the other woman remember.”
“So the whole bunch is like that?”
“Pretty much…Stone’ll likely get an earful just doing his job with this today.”
“But it’s his job?”
“And this is a small town, people won’t care about his job they’ll care that you’re my daughter and that you’re a lesbian.”
Emily clenched her hands. She knew what her mom said was right but still she just couldn’t help but get angry at it, at these people just what right did they have to act like that and what business of it was theirs?
They pulled up to the house and the sheriff did all the sort of paperwork stuff with her mom with the tow truck and Angie was home and was looking at Emily as she took her things and she headed into the house. Emily could see her looking too at her uncle and she was pretty sure that Angie knew who he was but she didn’t say anything about it as she opened the door for Emily.
She looked at her little sister.
“Sorry Angie…it…it just came out.”
Angie looked at her. “It’s okay…I mean it’s not and it’s already started and stuff but with me…and you it’s okay.”
“It is?”
“Yeah…I’m not one of those idiots that think gender or sexuality is a choice…you’re my sister.”
She hugged her. “Thanks…that means a lot.”
“It’s going to be bad Em but not as bad as it could be, it’s not as red-necked here as it seems.”
Things seemed to go in this weird fast but slow thing as the afternoon went on to evening and Emily cleaned her pads for lacrosse and washed her uniform and her clothes and did her homework and had supper with her sister and her mom.
Her dad was in later having had to get things and go out of town to pick up new tires for her mom’s car.
After supper she helped her dad set things up for the house…some cameras and a bunch of motion lights and going with him and taking the power saw and cutting down a couple of trees for the old back woods road that led onto their property.
“Dad? We really need to do all of this?”
He was digging, here and there where he figured a car or truck might try to go around stuff or even an ATV not trenches but these foot and a half deep good sized pot holes.
“Honestly I home not but people are kind of already being really shitty about this and it’s not really something I want to chance…they really could try this road and come onto the property here and I’m not chancing my family…so they can see the road’s blocked off I got signs up and if they still try well their busted axles aren’t our fault.”
She nodded but she was really hoping that it wasn’t going to come to this.
“You think they’ll do something?”
“Your mom and I grew up in this town and you and Angie might have a different generation with things and all but a lot of the assholes we went to school with are still here and so are their kids.”
She chuckled as she gripped the handles for the wheelbarrow. “I think I might go to school with some of the children of said assholes.”
He chuckled too and he grabbed the roll of barbed wire and they started going along the property line actually five feet in from it just to avoid some legal trouble and putting up fencing using the trees there back along the ridge and the road and they tied off the bright orange lumber/logging tape to it in a lot of places just so people wouldn’t be as apt to claim they didn’t see the fencing there. There were also several no trespassing signs and private property sighs as well.
It was fairly late by the time they had the signs up there and some up in the front part of the property.
Someone had done a drive by ball bat to their mailbox as they’d found it a dozen yards from where it was supposed to be on its post.
Emily wasn’t too happy as she hugged everyone but headed down to her room and turned on her computer.
She was looking to have a lot of blocking and reporting and stuff to do on her FB page. Emily booted up her computer and her accounts and she made a new folder just in case…
Yes…there it was starting with all the hater bullshit that you’d expect from people. There were a lot of anti-gay stuff and lesbian stuff on her page, hate messages from people she went to school with.
But nowhere near all of them.
Matt…the football guys, the guys on her team and a decent amount of others including some pretty surprisingly popular people we supporting her and Kira. Sure there were a lot of messages from those that were pretty nasty and things but there was a lot more tolerance than she thought that there’d be.
She smiled at the support and the kindness and she started first with the haters…doing screen captures of their comments and saving them to the folder she made and then she started to report them to Facebook and blocking others and she then started to thank the people that were being so kind in all of this.
She finished up with an entry on her page.
“Thank you all of you for being so good about me coming out. Honestly I never really knew that I was a lesbian or that I had these feelings until I was lucky enough to meet this brave and wonderful and special girl. I guess it just shows that you really can’t control who you fall for.”
Emily had it up for maybe five minutes before she had Kira pop up on her chat box.
“You fell for me?”
“Yes. *Blushes* falling.”
“Me too. *Shy smiles.*”
“How’d things go at home tonight?”
“Okay, we have a really long lane and there’s an old farm gate that we never us but we’re using it tonight.”
“Dad and I set up cameras and fences and made booby traps.”
“Booby traps?”
“Yeah he dug holes around the back road into our place big enough to drop a tire all the way in. And we put up signs.”
“My dad thinks we’ll be okay what isn’t farm fenced is kind of a boggy area and we already have cameras.”
“Because of California?”
“Yeah.”
“Was it bad?”
“Yeah and no…signs and stuff like bags of dog poop and messing with our garbage and spray painting stuff.”
“Any violence?”
“Yeah…at school.”
“I got a lot of people saying good things as well as bad.”
“They’re you’re friends…I got a few but it’s mostly just hate stuff.”
“Save it for proof and then report it and block it.”
“I already did.”
“You going to school tomorrow?”
“Yeah…I want to.”
“Me too.”
“Bring a couple of changes of clothes.”
“Why?”
“There a lot of accidental spills.” *Did air quotes*
“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“I can’t wait.”
“Me either.”
“Emily?”
“Yes beautiful?”
*Blushes* “I have an idea.”
……………………………. THE NEXT DAY.
Emily shivered a little as the wind whipped around her knees. The plan was that a lot of people would just think that they’d be all lesbian and that they’d butch it up or just wear jeans and stuff.
Not today…today she was wearing a dress…a sort of nice one with a kind of faux native print to it like a Pocahontas kind of thing and she had some bangles on and one of her nice crosses on a chain and she wore thing high stockings to go with the dress and her one inch heels.
Angie had helped her with her make up and her hair using the whole look to go with her being an autumn and she even had a purse with her along with her backpack and she wore her lacrosse varsity jacket to go with it.
She got on the bus and there were several kids not there that were almost always there and all the conversation stopped as she got on and she got this look from the bus driver with a nod and a smile. It was a much younger guy that old Harry.
Everyone was looking at her as she took her seat and then things slowly went back to normal as they drove until they picked up Kira.
Emily’s breath caught in her chest.
Kira had he hair styled very simply instead of her usual city kind of demi-spike thing and it looked actually blonder in this honey colored way and a bit longer. A country cloth dress like the kind with the small little flowers on it but with a short skirt to it and a low cut bodice that was boosted even more by a fancy bra.
White stockings and ballet flats and a soft looking sweater completed this look…girl next door meets super sexy lesbian goddess.
She actually stood for her as Kira got on the bus with some coffees from home.
The kids on the bus looked stunned.
Wait till they see then both at school.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 16
Chapter 16
Emily just stared at Kira as they rode on the bus and she couldn’t help but to take it all in. She was so beautiful in that seriously stunning way. Her outfit screamed Hollywood sexy even with the country styling and the cute long and tall socks that screamed thigh high stockings.
Was she just…
Was she getting so into this now because she had come out? Was she this “Raging lesbian?” She just couldn’t stop staring and al of the stuff Kira was doing, wearing was just drawing her in.
It couldn’t be the XY thing right? She read and read and read on it and she was kind of disappointed…she wasn’t tall or as beautiful or even as girly as the things have said. She was short and skinny and sort of a tomboy at heart.
Or was the tomboy thing a lesbian thing?
The feelings though made her really feel her own girlness…the dress was distracting and she knew her nipples were hardening…actually felt good and yet strange too she’d never had this happen a whole lot.
It was the whole Low-E thing likely for most of that too. The hormones were sort of helping it was still just the start but the sex stuff…all of it went with that. Though her hardening nipples were also making her breasts itch and ache a little too.
Kira passed her a coffee. “Wow Emily you look amazing.”
Emily couldn’t help the little shiver in the way that Kira said it. It was breathy but in the breathy way you say something when you’re actually impressed.
She took the coffee and blushed. “God, thanks I feel so self conscious.”
“Really?” Kira swept her skirt part and sat reminding Emily that she had to do the same.
“Yeah, I never really wear dresses that much.”
“Why not you look awesome in them?”
“I kind of live in the boonies Kira, they’re not y’know good for doing stuff outside and then there’s the bugs and well mom and Angie.”
“Sorry, if I’d known you weren’t into them we’d have tried something else.”
“No, this is actually kind of okay…I think maybe attitude helps too? I think I skipped some of me growing up right stuff with the hormone thing. I‘m still getting used to them running through my system.”
“Well yeah I can get that. But the clothes have an attitude thing too. I mean I love my pants and my jeans and stuff but there’s nothing like a skirt to make you feel sexy and a dress to make you feel beautiful.”
Emily smiled and took a drink of her coffee. “You nailed both today.”
Kira smiled around her coffee. “Well I might have had a bit of a reason to go a little further.”
“Yay me?” Emily smiled a little raising her eyebrow.
“Definitely you.” Kira said it slowly but in that way that girls do that makes you want to kiss them.
“You know I want to so PDA with you right?”
“People will freak, but I thought of that.”
“Oh?”
Kira took Emily’s hand in a handshake. “We do this…when my thumb strokes on top of yours I’m kissing you.”
Emily blushed because it was this slow sensual stroke. She stared into Kira’s eyes. “And when I stroke under your thumb?”
Kira smiled then closed her eyes as Emily stroke her thumb under Kira’s into that bend of the knuckle just behind her thumbnail. “It’s…lower…” Oh Emily thought…felt…it was so good and Kira said that so.
Kira’s eyes opened. “Yes…and when I touch the knuckle over your index finger…that bump…”
Emily blushed as she did and she could swear that she could so picture the touching again over her own, and Kira’s thumb doing that.
She swallowed and nodded. “We could do that.”
There were some looks from the other kids now and then but they just sat together drinking their coffee and holding hands…concealed by the bus seats but both girls smiling all the way to school.
The bus pulled into the school and there was a lot more kids out there than before and she swallowed and she got off the bus holding hands with Kira.
There were some murmurs and so dirty looks but Matt came out of the crowd with a couple of the football team and Craig Phillips was there too on his crutches and Lee and Roy and the other guys from the lacrosse team.
“Guys?” She asked.
“Hey.” Matt smiled and hugged Emily and Kira.
Some one in the crowd yelled. “Dykes!” A guys voice and some girl yelled out. “You’re goin t’hell!”
Then someone threw a cup of coffee at them from back in the crowd and Craig batted it away with his crutch.
There was some others starting to get rowdy. And others getting in their way and then.
“ENOUGH, THERE WILL BE NO MORE OF THIS NONSENSE AT THIS SCHOOL!”
The principal was there with the football coach and the lacrosse coach and some other faculty there and a megaphone. He lowered it as all the kids turned to look at him.
“Get inside all of you.” He said with the tone of a man that would take no more bull. The kids started to break off into groups and some were going up to him.
“It’s not right God say it’s not right.” One girl.
“It’s a public school miss Lang, we follow the constitution here.” He replied.
“One nation under god!” She shouted at him.
“I can’t allow one religion’s views over another’s miss Lang.”
“There’s only Christ Mr. Connors!”
“And I believe there’s nothing he said about those that are gay there young lady.”
She stormed off inside and took out her cell phone and seemed to get even madder.
“Damned faggits they’re going to wreck the place.” Doug Price added stalking past.
“Watch your mouth mister Price, I won’t have slurs in this school.”
The kid frowned at him but shut his mouth and headed inside.
“I’m leavin, I’m not going to school here with this sick stuff going on.” Melody Campbell huffed. “And I’m telling my father and the pastor too.
“You have a good day then miss Campbell. In fact anyone else here who doesn’t want to go to class at a school that stands up for all it’s students whether gay or straight, black or white, christian or otherwise can be considered free to go.” He added raising his voice.
She left too in a huff but headed for off the school grounds and cussing at her phone. There were a few doing the same too and at least twenty headed for cars with threats of telling their parents and others and all having trouble with their phones.
Someone yelled. “Hey! None of the phones are working!”
Emily checked hers and couldn’t get a signal. She looked at Kira who was smiling a little.
“You’re phone work?”
“Nope, not going to try it though.”
“Why not?”
“Because the principal did it.”
“Huh?”
“He put in a cellphone blocker here. No wireless at all.”
Matt looked at Kira. “People are going to flip out.”
She nodded. “They are but the school can do it.”
Emily looked at her. “Why?”
“Cyber-bullying. I’ve see this done on TV most of the worst cyber bulling starts at school, and then afterwards this cuts out them from getting organized.”
“But people live on their phones.”
Craig grinned and went with them on his crutches. “Being off line will be good for people for awhile.”
“But the parents?”
Matt put his phone away after he checked it. “They’ll have to deal or fight with him I guess.”
Craig nodded. “He won’t give. There’s too much phone abuse in just texting and using them in class time.”
Emily shrugged. “Well soon a lot of the screeching won’t be about us being out.”
Kira nodded. “That might be why. But it’s nice having the administration on your side for once.”
They all looked at her.
Kira sighed. “My situation was causing a disturbance at the school that threatened the academic well being of the other students.”
Emily leaned in and hugged her. “It’ll be okay, Kira this time’ll be different.”
Kira gave her this smile and slid her hand together with Emily’s and ran her thumb over Emily’s in a slow sweet swirl and then she returned the favor.
“It already is better.”
………………………….The announcements over the PA system certainly took a lot of the students before the pledge of allegiance by shock and surprise.
Principal Connors came on saying.
“Some of you may have noticed that your cell phones, tablets and laptops are not getting access to the wireless signal. This has started as the implementation of a new school policy to curtail the distraction of social media and texting during school hours with the exception of lunch hours. You parents and guardians will have received e-mails this morning and as always they will be able to reach all students through the office land lines and each teacher will have of course a staff phone in case of emergencies. There will be mini pizzas and franks and beans as the lunch specials today.”
Needless to say a lot of the other kids freaked out. Emily found it sort of okay actually since she’d never been married to her phone and not a part of the school’s in crowd enough to be texting or getting texts in class.
But by second period there were signs of some kids having withdrawal from not being in constant electronic contact with the not really matters oh so life and death stuff that some of them needed so badly.
Though it still never stopped her getting looks.
Stares.
There was even a few girls that complimented her on her outfit. Like Jennifer and Bianca in English as the teacher was writing some sonnets down on the boards
“Thanks I’m trying something different with coming out as a lesbian and playing for the lacrosse team I was expecting to get tossed into all those stereotypes.”
“Oh okay, but is Kira going to be the top? Is that right?”
“I dunno, the only time we did stuff’s been face to face. I’m not sure there is a top.”
“Oh…what’d you do?”
“Hey…I don’t kiss and tell.”
“Okay, but you look good.”
“Thanks, but I mean I’m with Kira and she’s so…and she was a model too.”
One of the others that was listening in nodded. “Yeah, I’m straight and Kira’d still make me have a maybe column.”
They actually laughed a little together.
Not every one was against them.
Actually a good half she figured really didn’t care.
Maybe this wouldn’t be as bad as her mom thought?
By morning break she watched as dozens tried their phones and many more went to he office to voice their displeasure.
She was getting looks though from some of the students still as she went to the cafeteria to meet up with Kira.
But the worst trouble-mothers were at the office. She met up with some of her team on the way and then she saw Kira waiting for her there with two coffee’s and a handful of chocolate whoopee pies and they all sort of sat together.
Kira shook her hand and thumb-kisses with her a few times before they stopped to eat. A few of the kids at the table had odd but inquisitive looks at them doing that and the two girls sat together and joined in on the conversation over the new policy.
Emily fed the last of her cookie to Kira and Mrs. O’Donnell came over in a huff.
“Stop that!”
Kira chewed, looked right at her and slowly chewed and then icked her lips. “Stop what?”
“You two feeding each other…it’s dirty.”
“Emily…? You washed your hands right?”
Emily swallowed, this was…she never stood up against authority…she bit her lip a second. “Of course I did.”
Kira stared at Mrs. O’Donnell. “See not dirty.”
“You…you two both know what I mean it’s dirty and disgusting and I won’t have any of it here!” He voice had climbed into the shrew ranges.
Emily looked at the woman and then at Kira and then back at the woman. “You seem upset Mrs. O’Donnell, if it’d help I’m sure my girlfriend wouldn’t mind making you a soothing cup of green tea.”
Mrs. O’Donnell purpled. “You little fr…you keep that commie tea…of course you turned out like this just look at your mother.”
“Mrs. O’Donnell that’s more than enough!” They all looked over to see this nicely put together native American Woman in a smart looking blouse, jacket and skirt combination.
The old biddy turned on her and sneered. “I have the right to say whatever I feel is right to educate the students here Mrs. Connors.”
“Actually you don’t and you certainly don’t have the right to harass our students here.”
“You’re not a teacher here. You’re just the wife of that hippy principal here.”
“Actually I am a teacher here since there’s been a vacancy since this morning.”
“Vacancy?”
“Mr. Brewster was fired for breach of teacher student ethics.”
The old biddy paled and the principals wife continued. “He was caught photocopying hate literature leaflet’s you wouldn’t know anything about that would you?”
“No! Of course not there’s just…there’s just a time and a place for such…things…and public isn’t one of them.”
“Well you’re more than welcome to take that up with the school board and the union anytime. But holding hands and feeding a cookie to someone hardly is an over the top public display of affection.”
“Well…well it’s not right…” She huffed off and was mumbling and muttering the whole time and Mrs. Parsons gave the kids a nod before heading off to keep watch over things in the cafeteria.
Kira smiled at Emily. “Girlfriend huh, we haven’t even had a first date yet.”
Emily grinned back. “My mom does want to get to know you more we could have supper and an in house date.”
“In house date?”
“I found out we can watch that Buffy show on Netflicks together.”
“It’s a date then.”
There was a sigh and they looked down the table at Emily’s team mate Alex. “I so wish I could find a nice guy to do that with too.”
Everyone there just kind of stopped since this was the first time a jock in school admitted to being gay.
Matt leaned over and hugged him around a shoulder.
The bell rang to get back to classes, and they all got us and left together as a loose sort of group but one that was trying to be there for each other.
Emily smiled a little and took Kira’s hand once they were clear of the crowd. “Walk you to class?”
Kira smiled at her. “Please that’d be really nice actually.”
X-Why-Me… Chapter 17
Chapter 17
*Before…
Emily grinned back. “My mom does want to get to know you more we could have supper and an in house date.”
“In house date?”
“I found out we can watch that Buffy show on Net flicks together.”
“It’s a date then.”
……………………The bell rang to get back to classes, and they all got up and left together as a loose sort of group but one that was trying to be there for each other.
Emily smiled a little and took Kira’s hand once they were clear of the crowd. “Walk you to class?”
Kira smiled at her. “Please that’d be really nice actually.”
*And Now…
The rest of classes seemed to go so slowing for Emily; I was Kira of course ad how she had gotten under her skin. Dating, well sort of dating and then there’s this…there was this feeling under her skin of being with someone.
It was exciting.
Kissing Kira was exciting, touching was exciting.
It was very much in the forefront of her thoughts that she hadn’t seen Beth Tailor and Veronica West come close enough to…
Beth spit on her and Veronica held her cross on her neck like it was her middle finger.
Beth… “Dyke.”
Veronica… “Whore…you’re goin to hell.”
Emily stopped shocked and…honestly it hurt but she wasn’t in tears as much as it made her mad. She wiped at her jacket with some Kleenex and watched them go with some more of the girls they were friends with.
Sorta friends with.
Those kind of kids really did tend to eat their own.
And not in the good way…. (Blush) there she was thinking of Kira again.
Emily let out a sigh and headed to German and saw a few friendly faces from the people on the team mixed in with some of the ones that were ticked off at her.
Nothing happened except Mr. Kirkland decided to teach some of the LGBT terms to them in German. It wasn’t a dig but he did use what he could to teach including his tablet with things from a German newspaper.
You could even talk to each other in class provided you did it in German.
It’s the mid-west German’s a popular language choice these days instead of just Spanish. You took Spanish though all the way through middle school.
Class went buy pretty quickly and then it was off to practice. They were putting security cameras up in the hallways and there was a leaflet stuffed in the sides of everyone’s locker.
It read. “Do to the incidences of both live and as well as online bullying we have placed recording security cameras in all of the schools main halls, locker areas and cafeteria as well as the parking lot.”
It was signed by the Principal and all the office staff from the VP to the Guidance councilor and even the secretary.
There was a lot of buzz about that and she headed to practice her shoulders a little slumped.
She smiled as Craig Swung up beside her with some of the others on his crutches. He smiled back. “Hey, how you holding up?”
“Better, the shock’s wearing off and stuff from coming out. Have got a lot of dirty looks though.”
“Yeah, old fashioned hate’s still a ‘Lifestyle choice’ that’s en vogue around here.” Craig stopped and used his back to shove open the door and hold it there while taking the opportunity to do air quotes.
Emily grinned. “You know we could use that.”
“Huh?”
“As like some slogan or something against the haters.”
“Cool I thought of something?”
“You’re a smart guy Craig; don’t put yourself in the dumb jock roll. Smart’s still sexy when it comes to girls.”
“And you would know….?” His face was kind as he said it a joking kind of look.
“I’m bisexual actually or whatever. I liked boys before Kira and still do it’s only Kira’s the girl that made me realize that I like girls too.”
“Oh…cool, there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“Nope…I mean I guess not it’s still really new to me though.”
“I don’t blame you for dating Kira though…I mean I’m seeing my girlfriend but I can still look y’know and Kira’s a serious catch.”
Emily laughed. “Top ten counting Lynn of course.”
“Of course.” He grinned back.
Practice was in the building instead of outside and it was mostly exercising and hitting the weight room and doing strength training stuff and a lot of time doing speed trials on the bikes there was a lot of bikes in here to use for training since most of the teams used them for training.
Emily hadn’t really done this kind of thing really since joining the lacrosse team but she was actually enjoying it. It wasn’t a butch thing but it was more like that guys on the team were friends and she enjoyed the company and the team banter and stuff and the praise.
That was to her pretty cool getting praise from a bunch of guys for stuff way outside the whole normal range of girl stuff. Like her bike times or her lift weights. It was really nothing of course compared to them but she still enjoyed it and the thought of getting and staying in shape for Kira.
Ab’s…if she could get abs then Kira might be able to touch them and more while they were making out and making her way down…
Lee looked over at her. “Wow uhm Emily are you cold?”
“No…oh shit…”
She stopped working the butterfly press to cover herself she was poking and noticeable through her sports bra. It might not be a big deal some of the time but she was only wearing her thin jersey and she was showing through that too.
She turned red.
Lee and the guys just looked at her. James one of the other guys just looked at her and shrugged. “Kira?” he asked.
She blushed and nodded. “And I’m on hormones.”
“Hormones like what for?”
She looked at the guys. “I can’t have kids; you know the whole no period thing right?”
They nodded.
“Well it’s because of all of that I don’t make enough and that’s why I’m playing catch up with all the other girls.”
Lee nodded. “Cool so the hormones are like going to make you like super horny?”
The guys through towels at him. “Lee don’t be an ass!” Was the general shouting.
She nodded still blushing. “And like all my emotions are like getting whacky too or whackier.”
James nodded. “So like puberty.”
She nodded. “Yeah a sort of second one…again.”
He shrugged. “Em don’t sweat it. It’s like no different that us popping wood.”
Heh…really like it she sort of thought to herself ruefully. She just nodded though than say anything.
“Look it don’t take a lot for us guys sometimes, pressure, friction, thinking of girls.”
“Or hot guys!” Alex said.
There was a pindrop silence.
Lee mouthed off saying. “And there went my boner.”
There was some laughter but James leaned on the universal. “No…that’s my point, you’re into girls and have a smoking hot girlfriend and Alex is gay and who knows what else might trigger who let’s just let it slide with the comments okay everyone? This stuff happens and we can either talk about it when it happens or we can just let it happen and not embarrass that heck out of each other.”
Lee went… “But girls like to talk about their feelings.”
Emily knew he was joking and she smiled a little and started using the machine again. “Lee?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m not the one that brought it up.”
She smiled some more as she sort of scored a point and the weight room burst into laughter.
Angie had actually waited after her classes to meet her once she got out of the gym and the showers so they could take the late bus home. Kira was over at the diner working and it was kind of cool that she had stayed.
She went over to the stop and smiled a little at her sister. “Thanks for staying?’
“Had to, I had afterschool detention.”
“What for?”
“Crank O’Donnell she was really pissed off and I got a detention for smarting off at her.”
“What happened? Her beef’s with me and Kira not you.”
“Oh…well her beef with you has turned into her beef with me and my whole family situation.”
“She went there?”
“Oh yeah she said the town was going to hell with us all being over run with the devils own…the sodemites, the heathens and the offspring of adulterers.”
“That old so and so.”
“Well yeah she’s like ancient and I think that the only thing keeping her alive’s like hate and old lady crazy.”
Emily smiled. “So what’d you do to get detention?”
Her little sister smiled. “Well since she said that while looking right at me then. I looked right back at her and did my best imitation of her and said….Hey you dykes get off my lawn!...so I was given a detention for smarting off and using the D-word.”
Emily giggled since when Angie said what she did she did the imitation again and it was pretty funny.
“So sorry sis to cause you all this grief.”
Angie hugged her. “Honestly not a big deal. I mean this was going to be thrown in my face the first time I dated someone that the in crowd or the better than you people thought that I shouldn’t be dating.”
“Yeah but still.”
“No…we’re cool on you being a lesbian and stuff that’s actually not a big a deal as people being pissed with me through you that the phones don’t work.”
Emily winced she knew that was going to happen.
“Sorry.”
“Yeah well they’ll have to store it up until after schools and stuff.”
“Yay, I can’t wait.”
The busses came and she got on with her sister and there were a few kids that avoided them and there were some that as Angie had said kind of blamed her for the phone thing. Even as small a rinky dink place as this and living out in the boonies they had cell and smart phones.
So most of the bus ride was telling them over and over what was announced and that she and Kira had nothing to do with what the administration had done.
Everyone went quiet though when the pulled up to the end of their driveway and there was a Barbie doll with Dyke on it in black marker hanging from a noose at their mailbox.
Emily took out her phone and called 911
“Hello? I’d like to report a hate crime.”
……………………………………….The police had come along with the sheriff and her dad drove down once they had called him. The bus driver had actually called it in too on the C.B. and said that they couldn’t leave.
It was only actually twenty minutes before the cops and the sheriff had showed up and took the statements.
Some of the cops still looked like they were wanting to say something snide about the whole thing and the bus driver made a point to say and make sure it got down in his official statement that. “It was there when we pulled up.” Parent’s…some very pissed parents showed up to get their kids once their statements were taken.
And the sheriff stopped two of the town police from touching it without gloves….
“What?” He grumped.
“Gloves first its evidence.”
“It’s a doll fer christsakes.”
“Its evidence now all of you guys do this right.”
“It’s on camera.” Angie said and they looked at her and saw she had her smartphone pointed at them.
The cop got very red faced and likely would have said something but…
But their dad and then even their sort of uncle the sheriff moved between them. “Just bag it and seal it before this get’s any worse.”
There was muttering and stuff but they complied and took statements and since they were out of town limits the sheriff took the evidence.
The police officers there didn’t look happy.
There were some mutters too as they left first and pissed looks at the sheriff and the bus driver but a lot for Emily and Angie and their dad too. Emily didn’t hear what was said but they used the f-bomb a few times.
She looked at her dad and he waited until the cops had left and offered his hand to the bus driver who shook and the sheriff who just looked at him and his hand and headed towards his car. “I have to get this to evidence and do up a report, good evening all.”
He left with a nod and got in his truck and drove off and the bus driver left after that saying he had to do the same after getting the bus back to the garage.
Emily looked at her sister and her Dad and her throat hurt and her mouth was dry.
“I’m so sorry you guys, I’m sorry.”
Both of them hugged her and she started crying and they hug walked her up the drive way to the house.
X-Why-Me…Chapter 18
*Before…
She looked at her dad and he waited until the cops had left and offered his hand to the bus driver who shook it and the sheriff who just looked at him and his hand and then headed towards his car. “I have to get this to evidence and do up a report, good evening all.”
He left with a nod and got in his truck and drove off and the bus driver left after that saying he had to do the same after getting the bus back to the garage.
Emily looked at her sister and her Dad and her throat hurt and her mouth was dry.
“I’m so sorry you guys, I’m sorry.”
Both of them hugged her and she started crying and they hug walked her up the drive way to the house.
*And Now…
It took a little while for Emily to calm down after everything that had happened and her mom was being really cool and really supportive to her through the entire thing and sat with her on the couch with a flannel blanket fresh out of the dryer with a dryer sheet tossed into it.
She knew her mom was mad and she knew that this might not be the end of things either. She absolutely just hated the way that they were all acting out there!
She wasn’t the one hurting anyone they were!
She had fallen asleep at some point and she opened her eyes when she heard a car door close outside and she got up and draped her blanket around her and she saw Kira and her dad and her mother coming in and there was some handshakes and stuff with the parents and Kira was just coming inside the living room when she realized that she’d been here and crying pretty much ever since she got home.
She covered her head with the blanket like it was a hood. “Don’t look I just woke up and I’m a serious mess.”
Kira chuckled. “Em, I’m kind of planning on us being together long enough that me seeing you with bed head and having morning breath is normal.”
Whoa…really?
“Really?”
Kira laughed. “Yes really jeeze you know I like you girl.”
“But we barely know each other…”
“Says the girl that had her hands driving me crazy in the girl’s locker room after her game the other day.”
Emily seriously blushed. “I was…that was…”
Kira walked over and even as dressed down as she was in a Spurs? sweatshirt and these really great looking embroidered and faded jeans she still seemed to glide and sway when she moved.
Kira was so awesome to watch.
Emily just sort of stared at her though as Kira came right over to her and used both her hands to pull back the flannel blanket from her head like she was pulling back the hoof of a cloak or something like that and she tucked an errant strand of hair away from Emily’s face before she leaned down and kissed her.
It really, really felt so good after a long shitty day. Emily inhaled and smiled if a bit shyly and then rested her head on Kira’s amazing chest and hugged her. “Thanks, you have no idea how much I needed this right now.”
She could feel Kira kiss the top of her head. “Yeah, I kind do. I’ve sort of been through this before Em…”
(Sniffle.) “Yeah…sorry.”
“It sucked but it’s actually kind of good since I get to be here and I get to be with you.”
Emily smiled a little more and she lifted her head and looked at Kira. “You’re amazing you know that?”
“No…I’m really not.” Kira looked kind of serious and a little sad?
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
“I…I’ve been kind of keeping some stuff to myself because of stuff like this and now it’s sort of happening again and you really need to know Em before…well in case you decided to change your mind about us.”
Kira actually looked around the living room to see who was there or might be listening and Emily did too and seeing no one she took Kira’s hand and walked her to the stairs and down into her bedroom.
“You can tell me anything Kira…life’s…life’s pretty strange y’know and trust me I get strange.”
Kira nodded and she sat down on the steps and she put her knuckles to her mouth and sat there a few minutes and said while looking at the floor.
“I’m a boy.”
“You’re a boy…you don’t look it.”
“I know…I had work done remember.”
“Okay…so you have a…?”
Kira nodded.
“So why do you look like this?”
Kira still just kept her eyes on the floor. “When I was twelve I started getting this thing, its called gynocomastia and I started growing these.” She gestured at her breasts.
Emily sat on the floor and nodded as she pulled her knees up.
“They just wouldn’t go away either because in some cases they do…some people get it and it goes away and then there was the whole surgery thing and I…I just couldn’t it freaked me out and that’s when I was noticed by the modeling company.”
“Did they know?”
“No…and with stuff dropping off in the economy and I knew we were going broke because I’d heard mom and dad talking about how much money we lost when the market dropped out from under us and stuff so I told the modeling guys sure and then told mom and dad.”
“And they never knew you were a boy?”
“No…I take after mom and I wasn’t exactly looking like a guy and my face and stuff hadn’t changed and we decided to try it out.”
“So how’d Kira come about?”
“The first six months it was okay, scary but okay and instead of getting teased and even before my breasts started I was teased because I still sort of looked…girl. I was getting complimented I changed schools and other kids liked me and stuff.”
Emily nodded. “Okay and…?”
“I was enjoying being a girl so I got really kind of foolish.”
“Foolish?”
“I was going to therapy and they wouldn’t budge on me going and doing hormones and stuff so I went to Chinatown on advice from a kinda sorta friend and I bought breast cookies.”
“Breast cookies!? What the fuck are breast cookies?” Emily said shocked and actually giggling.
Kira covered her face with her hands as she turned red. “They’re these estrogen kind of cookies they have like this Asian yam stuff in them that’s supposed to make boobs get bigger.”
Emily looked at her own chest. “Got any left?”
“No!” Kira sort of faux kicked at Emily a little.
Emily snorted. “Ate a lot of them huh?”
Kira did this really cute really embarrassed whine. “Yes…and Mom’s genes caught up with me and that’s what happened here.”
“Okay but you said you had work done?”
Kira sighed and lowered her hands. “When my parents figured it out I was so grounded and my therapist took it just as bad and stopped my sessions for a while or the gender sessions and decided that I had other problems and I was seriously grounded and then…then someone found out about me from before at the school I was going to and it was out…I was a tranny and I never even knew that I was out until a bunch of people jumped me and beat me up really badly.”
Emily moved and sat up on her knees and rested her hands on Kira’s. “I’m sorry..”
Kira shrugged. “I was in the hospital and I needed reconstructive surgery because they broke stuff in my face and while SRS was totally out of the question dad paid for Facial feminization surgery and stuff.”
“But how?”
“Mostly the money I had for modeling that we saved up and stuff and some legal stuff from the assault…the police did find out who did it and stuff and there was a settlement…”
“Settlement they hospitalized you!?”
“They were charged it’s just two of them had money and dad was out for blood and mom’s brother is a pretty mean lawyer so…”
“So…?”
“So that’s sort of it…I had some things done and the modeling company didn’t renew my contract over the whole thing.”
“Assholes”
“No, no not really they didn’t fire me and stuff or try and like sue me for damaging their brand it could have gone a lot worse really Emily.”
“Still…”
“People aren’t that open in California, That Prop eight stuff was alive and well.”
Emily shook her head. “So you guys can here to get away?”
“Yeah…even after everything that happened school was a nightmare in all these shitty little ways and the money thing really was happening and we were losing things so we did have here to come to as an option and we sold stuff and we moved.”
“Here?”
Kira looked at her and she smiled. “Well I wasn’t supposed to be dating and stuff but you just happened Emily and…”
Emily sat up a little higher and kissed Kira.
It didn’t matter, it really didn’t matter…she was really debating too on letting Kira know her own little secret but…not right now…not after everything today and this.
Kira was really scared because Emily could feel her shaking as she kissed with her.
She broke the kiss and looked Kira in the eyes.
“It doesn’t matter.”
(Sniffle.) “It doesn’t?”
“Nope, not a bit you’re still the most beautiful girl in the state.”
Kira gave her this; a little teary but really amazing smile.
“You’re so amazing Em.”
Emily shyly smiled back.
“Ditto beautiful, Ditto.”
X-Why-Me?… Chapter 19
Chapter 19
*Before…
It didn’t matter, it really didn’t matter…she was really debating too on letting Kira know her own little secret but…not right now…not after everything today and this.
Kira was really scared because Emily could feel her shaking as she kissed with her.
She broke the kiss and looked Kira in the eyes.
“It doesn’t matter.”
(Sniffle.) “It doesn’t?”
“Nope, not a bit you’re still the most beautiful girl in the state.”
Kira gave her this; a little teary but really amazing smile.
“You’re so amazing Em.”
Emily shyly smiled back.
“Ditto beautiful, Ditto.”
*And Now…
It was one of those sort of surreal moments like in the locker room for Emily and she took a breath and kissed with Kira. It was really light and soft and slow but it was just one of those moments where she just had to.
Just one more kiss before she told her.
And a deep breath.
“Kira…”
“Yeah Em?” Kira looked at her still with a little trepidation there but licked her lips a little nervously.
“I have something to tell you to…”
“Oh?”
Kira did that sexy Kira eyebrow raise. She was so good at that, how was she so good at that when she wasn’t born a girl and still was so…so hot.
Maybe there was a whole lot more to this business of sex and gender stuff.
Emily swallowed.
“I’m kind of like you are.”
“Huh?”
That started a nervous giggle out of her. Huh was the last thing she thought that she’d hear from Kira.
It was very, very everyday compared to the way that Kira seemed so with-it usually.
“Okay…” Emily took a minute to breathe. “Okay I’m like XY.”
“Pardon?”
“I…I was born different I have a condition…kinda like you but uhm different.”
“And it’s called XY?”
“It’s my chromosomes.”
“Oh…Oh!...so how does that work?”
“I have what they call CAIS. It’s basically I don’t process male hormones and even though biologically I’m XY which usually means boy since I couldn’t I grew up like this and thinking that I was a girl until I found out.”
“Whoa…” It was the first real kind of California thing she heard out of Kira or well the first stereotypical thing because here Whoa was definitely surf inflected. It made her smile.
“So you’re on those hormones because?”
“I don’t produce enough Estrogens to actually carry me through developing all the way like a regular girl would…I mean I won’t develop but it’s been like a really light and really long slow puberty.”
“Oh…is that normal?”
“Oh God Kira nothing’s been normal since I’ve found out.”
Kira looked at her and leaned forward again and kissed Emily lightly.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It doesn’t?”
“Nope…I’m still super into you.”
They kissed again and again and were kind of getting into it until the parents slipped passed and pointedly coughed several times.
Emily blushed at her step-dad who just grinned; her mom gave her the parental I caught you necking on my couch look and asked. “I thought you two were going to watch TV?”
“Oh that’s right I was going to show you Buffy. I still can’t believe that you’ve never seen it.”
“I was too busy to be into TV back home…sorry?”
"No, no it’s cool I get to show you this and stuff.”
Kira grinned…Emily seemed really excited and there had to be a lot of relief over everything she’d been holding back.
They got the remote and started to key the show up on Netflix and as soon as it started to play Emily took the remote and the blanket she had and sidled up close to Kira and they started watching the show starting with season one.
The parents were cooking and hanging out in the kitchen and they were doing a deer roast that Emily’s dad had got last year and the air was filling with the smells of cooking garlic and onions and other nice things.
Her dad usually did the cooking when it came to stuff like the deer meat or venison if you wanted to be like technical and stuff and he’d thaw the roast out all night and when it was ready to cook he’d get the roaster on the stovetop burners and get it hot and use it to sear the roast to seal in all the flavors.
He’d rub the roast in layers with some A1 Steak sauce and after it soaked in some soy sauce and then he’d rub butter all over it that had diced onion and garlic in it and salt and pepper. The butter was because the meat didn’t have a lot of fat in it and her dad trimmed almost all of the fat away anyway because that’s where on venison where most of the heavy gamey flavors lived.
Once it was seared off he’d toss more onion into the roaster and diced celery and diced carrots and once they started to cook a bit the roast would go back it and he’d add some thyme and rosemary and peppercorns and then some water and it’s go in the oven.
It was actually really, really good once it was all done and the pan liquid made a really good gravy.
A lot of people were fussy when it came to stuff like that but Emily and her family lived outside of town and it had always been a staple in the house. A family of four in these times her dad often relied on some of the things that his family had always done. Hunted and snared and putting in a garden and having wood heat and such.
With a sometimes iffy business like running a small airstrip it was a good thing that he did because some year’s people just didn’t have the money to fly or take lessons.
The smells of baked potatoes and other veggies joined the roast and her mom came into the living room and slipped in to get the scrabble board and the dictionary from the entertainment stand and headed back to the kitchen.
Despite how things had gone it was kind of shaping up to be a pretty decent night really.
About the third show in Kira leaned forward to watch a little more getting into it and she wrapped her arms around Emily and Emily could feel Kira’s breasts pressing into her back.
Oh…oh wow it made her own nipples harden.
She closed her eyes and just concentrated on that feeling and the memories of the locker room when she had Kira’s breasts in her hands and under her fingers and she fought the urge to squirm as she felt herself stirring down below and getting excited.
That was one of the things about being on her hormones was suddenly stronger urges.
Then like magic Kira kissed her neck.
“You taste as good as you smell Em.”
“Oh…”
It was like her blood started pumping faster, a lot faster.
“Mmmm…” Kira said doing it again and more…her lips parted and tasted skin, then there was the graze of teeth and more kissing.
Jack had never make her body feel like this…she swore she could feel her pulse hammering through her breasts and more. It was like her body was pulsing. Now she squirmed.
“No…no fair…”
“Why?”
“You’re making me feel so good….” (Gasp.)
“Well that’s kind of the idea Em.”
“It’d…it’d be rude not to return the favor.”
She felt Kira hug her suddenly and tightly.
“You accepted me for me Em…you didn’t freak out and you didn’t hurt me…You are making me feel good.”
Hurt her…
That and the pressure of the hug the tightness and the things that Kira had said before kind of painted an unhappy picture of things that she’d gone through.
And losing people that you thought were your friends, and people that should have still cared no matter what.
Kira acts tough but that was likely because she had to.
Very much faking until you make it.
Emily reached up and took her hands and hung onto the arms that were around her like clasping onto the blanket she had and she lean back and into her.
“I can’t help it Kira, I can’t you’re just easy to love.”
There was a sniffle and she felt Kira laying her head on her shoulder and she tilted hers until they were resting like that together.
They’d just taken a whole bunch of little opening up steps with each other but they were important ones.
X-Why-Me?… Chapter 20
Chapter 20
*Before…
Kira acts tough but that was likely because she had to.
Very much faking until you make it.
Emily reached up and took her hands and hung onto the arms that were around her like clasping onto the blanket she had and she lean back and into her.
“I can’t help it Kira, I can’t you’re just easy to love.”
There was a sniffle and she felt Kira laying her head on her shoulder and she tilted hers until they were resting like that together.
They’d just taken a whole bunch of little opening up steps with each other but they were important ones.
*And Now…
It was Emily was pretty sure the single best night and sort of date in her life. Kira there with her arms around her and all of that security and safety and softness and caring and the list of all those positives just kept going on and on and on.
Together watching Buffy on Netflix for Kira’s first time and the semi comedy and the laughing that came with it.
Laughing together.
There was a really, real thing about being with someone that GOT you she thought. Even with what had happened and what they had talked about.
Kira was still Kira and Kira was really so damned awesome and so really not a boy.
That actually kind of helped too.
Kira’s status as it were sort of made the whole XY thing that she was dealing with easier to take actually.
It was because Kira was such a girl…actually really more a young and very much in the heavy duty idea of woman that it was helping. Here was very arguably the hottest or one of the hottest girls in school and she was XY too.
Emily smiled at the other though as she punched in the stuff for the next show. Kira looked at her and she did that sort of sexy eyebrow thing.
“You’re really happy.”
Emily nodded. “I am, this is so much more then kind of date that I think I’ve wanted.”
“So not like your ex?”
“No, not like Jack. He was all about him and when it wasn’t about him it was about sex stuff.”
“Well we’re being pretty darned sexy and stuff right now.”
She looked at Kira. “Trust me it’s completely different.”
Kira nodded. “I know, I did have a boyfriend y’know…and this is extremely different.”
Emily smiled and leaned in and did a little nuzzle and a kiss. “Good different.”
“Best different.”
It was just that…so different it was this whole best sort of different Emily though as she did these little make out kisses with Kira between the parents coming and going until the food was ready.
Okay that had become sort of a have to hang with the parents thing as they ate and supper was good it wasn’t fancy stuff either it was just one of the things that’s made all over the place a roast the only thing different was the deer part.
It wasn't even that odd in these parts actually, especially if you fit in a certain income range.
Kira was having seconds. “This is really good, totally mid-west.”
Emily’s Dad beamed. “Thank you I’ve a good hand at stuff like this and Hamburger Helper and pretty easy stuff like that.”
Emily nodded as did her sister. “Yeah, Mom’s not a cook.”
Her mother went. “Hey! I can cook.”
Both daughters gave her skeptical looks.
She reddened blushing and mumbled. “I make good salads.”
There was some chuckling and Emily smiled as her dad slipped an arm around her mother and kisses her cheek. “You make kick ass salads hon.”
It was so one of the reasons she liked her step-father and felt okay about calling him Dad.
But it was true…it was true that he mom could cook but she wasn’t good at it. She might not burn things and she was definitely not a good from scratch cook but she could cook. And she made really good salads. Emily was pretty sure that was from practice, her mom ate more salad that anything else because of well…trying to stave off that whole getting older and fatter thing.
She looked over at Kira’s mom who was eating with gusto and piling the macaroni onto a slice of buttered bread like a folded over half sandwich and was rolling her eyes in enjoyment.
Though Emily thought she must store a lot of her food energy in her boobs.
Which had her looking at Kira again and her very generous figure.
Gosh she was so beautiful and yes even knowing all the stuff to know about Kira she was still so really stunning and she even ate in this sort of sexy way…not even dainty bites just bites but she so definitely seemed to enjoy it that she just looked…
Emily thought to herself… ‘I might just have a little bias there.’
It was still just this whole chaperoned parents and family getting together get to know everyone date but it was still really, really good.
Kira looked at the parental units. “We sort of hogged the TV and living room while you all were cooking Emily and I can do the dishes if you want.”
That went over actually pretty okay.
After the food was to be had and dessert passed out. Her Mom made chocolate pudding in parfait glasses with alternating amounts of whipped cream and the random bit of crumbled chocolate chip cookie and some mini marshmallows.
That she was good at too.
She smiled as her little sister left with the parents as they all took their desserts and headed out to the other room talking and leaving Emily alone with Kira who had started filling the sink full of dishes and water.
“I’ll wash you dry?”
“Good plan I know where everything goes.”
“Kind of the idea.” Kira said smiling as she was putting her hair back with an elastic tie and looked at Emily with this really cute sort of look.
Emily blushed and smiled as Kira was doing that because Kira with her hands like that were doing really interesting things to her breasts.
Kira noticed of course and she did that sexy eyebrow thing and slipped over to the sink. “Any tunes?”
Emily nodded a little wow-dry-mouthidly and went to turn on the radio on the kitchen counter and turned it to the local rock station and then got a towel to start drying dishes as Kira washed them. “I never really thought of doing dishes as part of a date before.”
Kira nodded. “Me either but I think it’s a good thing.”
“A good thing?”
“Well if we can do this and have fun then it’s a definite plus because there’s always going to be dishes.”
“Well that’s true…okay I kind of like that idea.”
“Me too.”
It kind of started when a song that they both liked came on and Kira started to sing along a little, it was that knows the chorus but not the words thing and Emily joined in and soon this led to that whole moving back and forth in that pre-dancing sort of shuffle that you sort of do when your hands are full and busy all the way into the next sink full of dishes and Kira drying off her hands and taking Emily’s and starting to dance with her as Cheryl Crow’s *All I Wanna Do is Have Some Fun.* started playing.
It’s that fun dancing, that sort of shimmy just a little, sort of moving back and forth too and lots of eye contact and lots of smiles.
It was fun.
It actually felt like a date more and more.
It was turning into one of the sweetest things that Emily could ever really remember. A few more dishes and another song hand on hips and some swaying.
“I like dancing like this Kira.”
“Me too, I never got to do this before.”
“You’ve never danced? You’re pretty good.”
“No, not a lot of the people I dated were into dancing.”
“Really?”
“Too self conscious I guess, we were kinda just kids.”
“We’re still kids Kira.”
“I feel older Em, just too much sometimes.”
“I…yeah I can see that.” And with everything so far that had happened she was sure that she’d be feeling the same thing before too long. Actually she did sort of feel older now, before all of this her life didn’t feel so heavy.
“But this, this was really worth it Emily, god this feels so normal.”
“Well we’re hardly normal.”
“No but it’s good enough, close enough.”
Emily was going to say something else but she just felt it instead that whole push pull as she stood on her tiptoes and pulled Kira into a pretty strong kiss.
All the way into hearing her parents doing the really pointed coughing.
Her Mom was there watching red faced and her Dad there with just a grin. “Dishes done we’re breaking out Trival Pursuit.”
She broke the kiss and looked at the kitchen. “Yeah, just give us a second and we’ll be right out.”
It only took a few moments to wipe down the sink and counter then they joined everyone in the living room sharing a space on the floor around the coffee table.
X-Why-Me?… Chapter 21
*Before…
“But this, this was really worth it Emily, god this feels so normal.”
“Well we’re hardly normal.”
“No but it’s good enough, close enough.”
Emily was going to say something else but she just felt it instead that whole push pull as she stood on her tiptoes and pulled Kira into a pretty strong kiss.
All the way into hearing her parents doing the really pointed coughing.
Her Mom was there watching red faced and her Dad there with just a grin. “Dishes done we’re breaking out Trivial Pursuit.”
She broke the kiss and looked at the kitchen. “Yeah, just give us a second and we’ll be right out.”
It only took a few moments to wipe down the sink and counter then they joined everyone in the living room sharing a space on the floor around the coffee table.
*And Now…
Emily frowned and looked at the game board.
“This really, really isn’t fair. Trivial Pursuit for you in like old people history for us.”
Kira burst out laughing as the adult’s sort of look insulted.
Okay Emily sort of started to laugh as the whole insult of it started to resonate with her mom and the look on her face was priceless.
Which made everyone actually laugh and even her mom was actually sort of cool with it.
But she was right it was all this like old stuff that they didn’t know and their parents did and so they were getting their butts kicked.
She looked over at Kira who was sitting on the floor with her semi-sideways just like she was even though she was actually equipped differently and she looked just the same as she did. And her Emily’s mom too who was sitting the same way on the couch.
Angie who was more into her tablet that playing was the only one sitting oddly doing that tweenager sitting on her knees with her legs actually bending outwards in a way that actually Emily used to do when she was younger too.
Now that kinda hurt.
She smiled at Kira who smiled back and they slipped their hands together.
Gosh Kira was still so beautiful, stunning actually Emily found herself looking at her more and more and their eyes meeting a lot during the game.
There was some eye-rolling by Angie and some looks from the parents but it was still all okay.
Even if they had been like super chaperoned.
The game was done and that was sort of the signal for like that one last adults having coffee and Kira and Emily took theirs and went out to the yard by her parents car and sipped at their coffee and leaned on the car.
Kira was looking out into the trees and she was smiling.
“I really didn’t want to come out here. I was so scared of being here and it all just being so much against me or anyone like me that I just…I am so not as tough as I act.”
Emily leaned on Kira’s side. “That makes sense, and I know you’re not as tough as you act. And y’know you don’t have to be okay?”
She shrugged. “It’s just that I met you and I had like stuff change and I’ve been through this stuff before and I kind of want to protect you.”
Emily looked over at Kira. “You know I’m good with that too right?”
Kira smiled and it was just…with the light in the night falling on her off of their porch and the whole sort of backdrop of the woods around their house and things it just sort of made Kira have this almost otherworldly look.
She was…with the hair and those eyes of hers and it was just catching so right. Emily stepped in and she kissed Kira again.
She just had to.
And kissing.
Kira smiled and actually said what was in Em’s head. “Mmm…Kissing is of the good.”
She wrapped her arms around Kira’s waist and sort of hung on to her by that and she kissed her again until he parents used the automatic car starter to sort of startle them out of making out and Emily blushed after she ended up making an Eeep sound and Kira had that look like she was so cute and more on her face.
Emily just looked back at Kira with the thought in her head of.
‘Everything will be worth it; everything will be worth it if she just keeps looking at me like that.’
There’s parental love and there’s stuff from sibs and even things from friends but when you really meet someone that see’s so much more than those bits of you and you can see it on their face it’s well.
It changes you.
Like when those science guys will say the moment that you observe someone you change it.
The minute that you experience someone else loving you it changes you because most people that haven’t felt that haven’t like felt that they were ver worthy of it.
Kira’s parents came down and they got ready and headed out and they let them have one final kiss/peck before they left and they drove out and Emily watched them go with a sigh.
A big happy sigh and she went back inside with her coffee and her mom sort of had that trying to work it all out still expression going on and her dad being a buffer between them and Angie was looking at her.
“Kira’s nice, Kira’s nice and she’s waaaaaay hotter than you so don’t mess this up dummy even if it’s like you and her doing the whole lez thing.”
Emily looked at her. “What lez thing.”
“Fast and all girly love and smoopy.”
“Smoopy?”
“Yeah Smoopy, like two puppies in love and stuff and fast. You gotta slow down cause you too are too young to be getting a U-Haul and stuff.”
“Angie!” That came from her mom.
Emily smiled both from that kinda sort of teasing from Angie and the whole amount that it sort of freaked out her mom who was still in that place between having a daughter that was actually like genetically a boy and having a daughter that’s a lesbian.
She headed down to her bedroom. “Smoopy I like that.” She said to herself as she got ready for bed and for school the next day and well thinking.
Not about all the could be’s that might really suck tomorrow but of Kira and kissing with her and then she took a bath and sank into the water thinking of taking a bath with Kira.
She closed her eyes and let her fingers drift.
Let them be Kira’s fingers.
Touching and tracing, taking soapy bubbles and leaving trails of them on her skin.
Hands touching her breasts.
Her so much more sensitive breasts now that she was taking hormone supplements and she arched in the water.
XY, XY, XY…. That certainly wasn’t getting in the way of the intense pleasure ache and not ache that felt sooo good as she touched her breasts and she felt the ache of want and need in her groin and crossed her legs in the water.
Used the meat of her thumb and forefinger to sort of be soft but firm and to mimic Kira’s mouth on her nipples…the soft skin but pressure and the kneading-suckle on her nipples.
She dreamed and dreamed until she just couldn’t stand it anymore and slid a hand down under the water and fingers in enough to find her clit.
She could still call it that right?
It wasn’t technically one; it actually didn’t have all the right parts and the formation and all of that stuff she’d been reading about. It was close but it was different.
XY, XY, XY… she gasped as the first little quake shook her down below.
Would Kira care if she wasn’t like other girls?
She hoped not, even with the way that Kira was it was one of those things…people could be funny and odd and scary even.
XY, XY, XY… Kira’s tongue…Kira’s fingers.
Emily arched.
She swore softly as she went flowing over the edge and out of herself.
Goddamn that was incredible.
She sank under the water and she held her breath thinking and feeling and trying to sort things out.
Kira knew and she knew about her and nothing had changed tonight but everything had changed tonight.
She knew about Kira.
And she knew about all of the crap that she lived through before this.
And kind of like what Kira had said she wanted to protect her too.
XY, XY, XY… Kira…girlfriend…she had a girlfriend.
XY, XY, XY…being on the team, playing and doing stuff and feeling stuff that wasn’t like the old her.
XX Emily had a whole lot of other thoughts about her life back then.
And Jack.
Oh god what an asshole why did she ever go out with him!?
XY, XY, XY… so maybe all of this is a good thing?
She surfaced and sat there for a little longer before getting out and drying off and taking a good long look at herself.
There was a lot of her there that XX Emily didn’t like about herself.
Short and not so curvy and nothing like even her little sister who was a total clone of their mom.
There was a lot to be insecure about from the XX point of view especially when you get raised around other women and girls where looks had a standard and looks meant stuff.
She turned here and there and went from side to side.
She was a girl….everything in the right places just not as much and just not as popular stuff either.
But looking at it from the whole XY place now.
That…all of it.
Well it wasn’t so bad actually.
She even pulled her hair back, looked and checked she headed back into her bedroom and slipped into bed.
She really needed to think about this some more.
A lot more.
But maybe, maybe she was more than either of those two little letters.
The thoughts felt like progress.
And she went to bed smiling.
*Before…
XY, XY, XY… so maybe all of this is a good thing?
She surfaced and sat there for a little longer before getting out and drying off and taking a good long look at herself.
There was a lot of her there that XX Emily didn’t like about herself.
Short and not so curvy and nothing like even her little sister who was a total clone of their mom.
There was a lot to be insecure about from the XX point of view especially when you get raised around other women and girls where looks had a standard and looks meant stuff.
She turned here and there and went from side to side.
She was a girl….everything in the right places just not as much and just not as popular stuff either.
But looking at it from the whole XY place now.
That…all of it.
Well it wasn’t so bad actually.
She even pulled her hair back, looked and checked she headed back into her bedroom and slipped into bed.
She really needed to think about this some more.
A lot more.
But maybe, maybe she was more than either of those two little letters.
The thoughts felt like progress.
And she went to bed smiling.
*And Now…
It’d been a long time since Emily had woken up smiling and just thinking about what happened in the tub made her blush.
Last night though even with the parental supervision had been amazing and it really wasn’t going away either.
There was a lot of things going on that should have made her feel worse but last night, the “date” the dance and other things.
It wasn’t like that with Jack or the other guys she’d dated.
This felt light.
And she guessed that was the big difference why the morning felt better.
She looked at the clock and sighed and climbed into the shower and got ready for school opting for some cute leggings that looked like a white knit print and a mini skirt and went for a change with the push up bra her mother bought for her to “help” with her chest issues. She kinda wanted the extra help today.
Well honestly she wanted the help for Kira.
That was the thing she decided to go with today, femme it up and be as pretty as she could.
Which sort of felt good too, she hadn’t felt like her old self since she found out about the whole CAIS thing. She went with a pick scoop neck that went with the bra and showed it off a little which was what she was hoping for.
There was a fine line with school faculty sometimes.
The same went for her make-up there was a certain amount that was okay otherwise you got punished or were just one of the outcast kids like the Emo kids or the Goth kids who got bullied for being different.
Still today she was going “girlie” something her mom would likely be thrilled about but it wasn’t to please her mother.
Emily checked everything twice over opting out on the lipstick until after breakfast.
Satisfied she took her hormones and her vitamins and headed upstairs grabbing her book bag and her lacrosse jacket and workout clothes as she went.
Angie was already up and was in a heated debate with their mom over her detention.
“You’re young Angie you should have just let it slide.”
“Mom, she’s an old bigot why should I let it slide?”
“People will remember why you did that and this isn’t the kind of town where all that misguided liberal stuff flies.”
“Misguided Liberal stuff? Mom she was preaching at us.”
“And you should just let it go. People talk Angela.”
“Well if they can talk then they can learn something right?”
Emily looked at her mom and her mom just looked frustrated and a mix of sad and mad both.
Their mom said. “People judge, and that follows you.”
Angie rolled her eyes. “Well if that follows me they can kiss my ass.”
“Angie!”
Emily tried not to laugh.
Then again it was Angie who was as headstrong as she was pretty and popular.
“What?”
“People will talk, people will hold that against you here and that’ll make finding a guy and a job a hell of a lot harder.”
Angie looked at their mother. “You sound like I’m going to stay here in town.”
“You’re not?”
“Hell no.”
Emily’s mom nodded as she surprised both of them. “Good.”
Emily asked. “Good?”
“Good, I want neither of you two stuck here like me. I was stuck here because I made a lot of wrong choices. I love you both but there’s not a lot of future or freedom in a little podung town like this.”
Emily looked at her. “Mom you did alright.”
Angie added in with. “Yeah Mom you did okay.”
She looked at the both. “I married your dad, I got lucky. There’s a whole lot of girls in town just like I was or worse off that are stuck here. I want, I really want better for both of you than any of that.”
Emily looked her mom in the eyes and she was really serious.
She knew that getting pregnant with her threw all of her plans off when her bio-dad or donor took off.
She hugged her and her mom pulled a frowny face. “Get ready for school both of you.”
Emily nodded. “Yes Mom.”
“Emily…”
“Yes Mom?”
“You look nice today.”
“Thanks mom I’m trying to get me feet back under me.”
“Good, just because you have a girlfriend and that you’re on the lacrosse team not does that mean that you have to fit some weird lesbian mold or something.”
Emily blushed. “Mom!”
Angie cackled.
Emily gave her the finger.
Angie laughed at her. “Keep you finger boner to yourself.”
Their mom yelled “Angie!”
Angie cackled again.
Emily blushed and grabbed some cereal and pop tarts and drank a quick cup of coffee as her mother frowned about her drinking it.
“You’re too young for coffee.”
“Coffee is of the good, coffee keeps people alive.”
Her mother was going to say something when their dad came in. “They both get that from you.”
And he got a punch in the shoulder from her mom. “Don’t take their side.”
“Ow, I’m not, but they take after their mother in a whole lot of ways. And some of them are very good ways.”
He kissed her around her grumbles and he passed both the girls a twenty for lunch money.
Angie squealed.
Emily tucked her’s away. “Thank you I might by my girlfriend lunch.”
“That’s the point, some good to offset the bad.”
Their mom stared at him then them and then him. “They’re going to earn that, twenty dollars for lunch is too much.”
“Yes they will I’ll have lots of chores for them to do down at the strip.”
“We have new clients?”
“We do and I’m going to be busy with them and being in and out of the lakes for most of the week.”
“Lunches?”
“They paid for full service so yep.”
She smiled. “Well that’s good news, I’ll get started on things as soon as the girls get ready.”
Emily shoveled her food down and washed it down with coffee and went to go and brush her teeth.
Angie joined her and they touched up their make-up and added lipstick and went to go and wait for the bus.
It was a little early so it made for a bit of a longer wait and Emily smiled when she seen it pull up and she got on. There were some looks from some of the other kids there and she looked for Kira who was in her usual spot smiling at her and she went and joined her.
Kira looked really good.
That lick you lips sort of good-nerves kind of hot.
Her hair was down in that sort of California easy tumble that she managed so well and she was wearing a nice pendant necklace and these really expensive and definitely city looking earrings. The kind that well looked like real gold and then there were the ones with the stones in them that looked real too.
Kira was one of the few non Emo-Goths with multiple piercings and hey all looked great on her.
Just like the really thin black sweater or like long sleeved tee shirt she had on that hugged her like a second skin while showing nothing but still somehow made her boobs look amazing and huge.
Bangles and bracelets and rings on her wrists that looked really good with her dusky grey-blue suede jacket that she was wearing and real denim jeans and not the Walmart stretch jeans and killer boots.
She sat with her and she smiled at her and they kissed.
People stared, and stared hard.
Right there on the bus with girlfriend on girlfriend lipstick on lipstick kissing.
They did that until the bus driver coughed over and over again.
“Girls, the school board still owns the buses. Calm it down okay.”
Emily grinned and Kira said. “Sorry, sir Emily’s just too cute, you know how it is.”
There was some laughs and some giggles and there were some more stares as this wasn’t something that kids did around here or at least not in public.
Emily blushed. “Too cute?”
Kira smiled. “Definitely, right in that whole literally could not help myself. You look amazing today.”
“Thank you and you look amazing as usual.”
“Old habits die hard plus I don’t want them to have the satisfaction.”
Emily smiled and slid her hand in with Kira’s. “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”
“Really, so we’re going to war today?”
“Well I wasn’t planning on it, but I’m not going to just take it. My mom took people’s shit when she was pregnant with me and after. I’m not letting them walk over me.”
Kira looked into her eyes with this excited light. “You look really, really cute when you’re determined.”
“Good I want to be on my girlfriend’s mind all day.”
Kira smiled. “Well that’s already accomplished, you were on my mind already.”
They got really close to kissing again.
Angie threw a wad of paper at them. “Hey you two heard the busdriver, do I need to get a hose.”
Kira laughed and Emily just sort of stared grinning just a little as she pictured her in that tight black top and it and Kira soaking wet.
Kira leaned in close. “What has you looking like that?”
“I kinda want to really have a hose right now.”
Kira grinned and whispered to her. “Well with your condition you’re out of luck and trust me it’s over rated.”
Emily burst out laughing at the self punning joke Kira made getting looks as they pulled into the school.
Everybody stopped talking as The Sheriff was there and were hauling Doug price off with him swearing.
“Dykes, you let these dykes in and doing whatever you want and we’ll have the faggots here next! We’ll have the trannies in here and then...then you’ll have people with animals!”
He broke free and ran away or tried to until one of the deputies took him down with a football tackle.
It was quiet on the bus.
So quiet.
Until Kira quipped. “Well that is going to leave a mark.”
Which started some nervous snickers.
The bus driver waited until the police had him in the back of the car before opening the doors and the kids poured out looking to hook up with friends to find out what had happened and what had been going on.
The driver looked at Emily and Kira as they were getting off.
“Just be careful you too.”
Emily nodded and determined she took Kira’s hand as they got off the bus together to stares.
They headed to the bus entrance and they were met and actually cover blocked by the guys on the team. Alex was grinning and passed them coffees from Caribou Coffee and he had a thing of fritters in a box too.
Kira took hers and a pastry. “Mmmm...chocolate hazelnut…”
The guys were watching her eat.
Emily was watching her eat.
She gave them all a mischievous hot girl squint smile with her mouth sexy full before taking a drink of her coffee.
Emily coughed pointedly. “Uhm guys hello, she’s taken.”
Alex looked at her the Emily then at Kira. “Seriously! Right on! We have our first official out couple in school history!”
Emily blushed. “Well yeah okay...what happened?”
Craig spoke up. “Dougie decided to try to take a baseball bat to Mrs. Connors car with her in it calling her a fag lover and a prairie nigger.”
Emily glared at where they drove off with him.
Lee added in. “With her in her car.”
Kira swore. “Shit, is he psycho?”
Matt nodded. “Pretty much, he was looking for you two before that.”
Emily stopped.
Matt looked at her. “We told him that we’d kill him if anything happened to the two of you.”
Kira stopped and looked at them. “Why? I mean amazingly, hugely thank you guys but why?”
Craig stopped and rested on his crutches. “We’re not all redneck assholes here, and Alex is gay and has been in the closet well until he just came out and you girls were here for that. We’re a team, we’re friends.”
Emily swallowed a lump in her throat. “Guys, thank you that’s amazing.”
Lee grinned. “Well I at least had an alterior motif. If you and Kira are alright and you’re on the team well then maybe I’ll get to watch you and kira making out.”
He stopped and looked at both of them back and forth a few times. “Seriously, could I watch?”
Everyone laughed because he was clearly just being a goof and laughed again when Matt and Craig both paintbrushed him in back of the head at the same time.
They laughed a little bit more as they just ate the fritters and turnovers just heading in and hanging around the lockers and having fun until the first bell rang.
Emily smiled as she headed to class.
All this bigoted stuff was likely far from over but for the first time she had friends at her back and she was pretty sure actually meant it unlike some of her old friends that left her in the dust as they developed faster than her.
Friends and a girlfriend.
She could handle this.