Shattered - A Poem

A million pieces of my soul
scattered on the floor
from words said
from deeds done
a childhood that was taken
stolen in the harshest way
a loss of pure innocence
never to be regained

I want to scream
yet I make no sound
I want to cry
but the tears cannot flow
dreams, they do not come easy
yet I live my nightmare

The questions abound
visions of the past
reality or illusion?
What was done?
More importantly, why?

And who am I?
Am I light or dark?
Angel or Demon?
Holy or evil?
Man or Woman?
Straight or Gay
Pure or tainted?
Do these questions even matter
or are they the ramblings of a damaged mind?
Can't the universe go on without me?
Do I matter at all?
Would the world even miss me if I were gone?

Surely life is something more than this
questions of a more nobler sort
not to be stuck in one moment in time
way back in the past
though it seems as only yesterday

A little child
the beast
a white world turned blood red
a cry that was never heard
if it was ever made at all

a tear
a release
a promise
a secret
a lifetime to figure it out