---

 

 

The alarm rings, It’s another school day. I sigh and get up to do my business and get ready for another crappy day.

 

You must be thinking I hate school right now, actually I love to learn, I am a straight A student and a bookworm, the problem is that I’m a social outcast, ignored by most and bullied by some. I can’t seem to fit anywhere, even the nerds even though considered social outcasts by most, they get along fine among themselves, I on the other hand am always alone. Being small doesn’t help either, I am 16 years old high school sophomore and just about 5’4” all of the guys and most of the girls are taller than me.

 

After the shower I dried myself and looked closely at my face reflected by the mirror looking for any sign of facial hair and like always I find nothing. That’s another thing that makes me the laughing stock among the boys at my school, all of them are bulking up and shaving, and me, nothing, no bulking up, no shaving and my voice hasn’t cracked yet, that and that damn incident last year.

 

I wrap my towel around my waist and go to my room to change. Like always I get a baggy t-shirt and a pair of jeans. No I don’t care much about my appearance and why should I? No one will talk to me anyway.

 

I walk downstairs and my mother is setting up the breakfast table. “Good morning, sweetheart. Did you sleep well?” she asked me.

 

“Fine” I grunted

 

“Rough night?” She asked me.

 

“Weird dreams.” I said. It is true, lately I been having strange dreams, but I can’t remember them when I wake up, just a feeling that I had strange dreams, am I crazy or what?

 

I picked up a couple toasts with peanut butter and a glass of orange juice for my breakfast. “You need to eat more than that, son.” My mother admonishes me.

 

“I’m not very hungry mom.”

 

“I still think you should eat more, you are too skinny.”

 

“Mooom.”

 

“I know, I know. But I do worry about you.” She said.

 

“I have to go, mom. See you tonight.” I said giving her a peck on the cheek.

 

“Have a nice day at school, sweety.”

 

“Byeee!”

 

 

###

 

 

It was a pleasant day, and I started to walk towards the school like I do every day that the weather permits after all I live just under a mile away from it.

 

There was a nice breeze and just a couple small white clouds in the sky ‘It’s a shame to spend such a nice day inside a classroom.’ I thought to myself.

 

Walking lost in thought, I suddenly bump into something soft and fall down. I look up and that ‘something’ was the most beautiful girl I ever seen. Looking at her I completely forgot about my compromising position, lost looking at her deep green eyes.

 

“Hey, are you okay?” She asked me.

 

“Huh?”

 

“I asked if you are okay.” She repeated.

 

“I....I guess so.” I said trying to get up.

 

“Here let me help you.” She said while extending her hand to me.

 

I took it and she helped me up. “T... thanks” I murmured.

 

“You are welcome.”

 

“Sorry for bumping into you. I was lost in thought.” I said.

 

“Don’t worry about it, I wasn’t paying attention either.” she said and giggled. “My name is Jessica by the way, what’s yours?”

 

“S.. Sam.”

 

“Nice to meet you Sam, are you walking to school too?”

 

“Yes I’m a high school junior.”

 

“Kewl, I’m a junior too, maybe we will end up in the same classroom. I just moved into town so I don’t know anyone yet. Today it’s my first day at school.”

 

“I’m pretty sure you’ll have lots of friends soon.”

 

“Can we walk together to school?” She asked with pleading eyes.

 

“Sure, I don’t mind the company.” I said. ‘Too bad it will probably be the last time too. After today she will probably ignore me like the rest of the girls.’ I sighed

 

“I hope you don’t think I’m strange asking you this, but aren’t you a little young to be a junior?”

 

“I am 16 years old, Jessica.” I said and sighed again

 

“Really? I thought you didn’t look older than 13, 14 tops.”

 

“I keep getting that, it’s annoying sometimes.”

 

“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t want to upset you.” She said dejectedly.

 

“Don’t worry, it happens to me all the time, and it won’t be the last I’m sure.”

 

“A late bloomer?”

 

“I guess.” I said shrugging.

 

###

 

A few minutes later we were getting close to the school building and Jessica said. “It was great to have bumped into you, Sam. I feel like I just made my very first friend here.”

 

Hearing that my eyes started to water, It’s been a long time since anyone called himself or herself my friend. “Thanks for saying that Jess, but I don’t think you’ll want to be my friend when the school day is over.”

 

“Why wouldn’t I want to be your friend?” she asked me confused.

 

“You’ll see.” It’s all I said.

 

“I don’t get it. You seem very nice. You are not crazy are you?”

 

That made me smile a little and I said. “No, I’m not.”

 

“Why don’t we meet outside after school and walk home together?”

 

I shrugged and said. “Sure, why not?”

 

“Great, see you later then.” She said giving me a hug and then going inside.

 

 

###

 

 

Getting to my locker this morning wasn’t so bad, I was just tripped and had my books dropped on the floor once. Once I locked the door I was suddenly shoved against it and I heard someone say. “Get out of the way girly-boy.” I just sighed and made my way to homeroom.

 

I sat down on my usual place on the back of the classroom and waited for the bell to ring. ‘It’s going to be a looooong day.’ I thought to myself

 

Once the bell rang, Miss Bell, our teacher came inside, did the roll call and said. “Good morning class. Today we have a new student starting at our school, Miss Jessica Campbell. Please make her feel welcome here. Jessica, you can sit behind Stephanie.” She said pointing to the seat.

 

Jessica looked around before sitting down and our eyes meet. She gave me a smile and sat down. Soon the other girls were chatting with her. ‘That’s it. After that she will never speak to me again.’

 

During the day morning I had 2 other classes with her, I saw her looking at me sometimes but was always surrounded by the other girls wanting to get to know her.”

 

At lunch as usual I avoided the cafeteria, as I usually ended up with food on my hair or my clothes wet because some jock would ‘accidentally’ drop it all over me.

 

The afternoon was pretty calm and soon it was time to go home. I decided to not wait for Jessica as she probably won’t appear anyway.

 

When I got outside, she was already waiting for me. She didn’t seem happy to see me though. ‘I have a bad feeling about this.’ I thought to myself.

 

“Hi... Jess.” I said meekly.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me you were a boy?” She said accusingly.

 

“What?”

 

“I thought you were a girl. You should have told me you were a boy.” She said angrily.

 

“What the hell are you talking about? I never said I was a girl, and my name is Sam, not exactly girly, is it?”

 

“I thought it was short for Samantha.” She said.

 

“See? I told you this morning that before the day was over, you wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore.” I said with tears flowing and started to leave.

 

“Wait.” She said running to me. “I’m sorry. It was thoughtless of me to accuse you like that, and I still want to be your friend.”

 

“Really? Do you still want to be my friend?” I said sobbing.

 

“Of course I do. Come let’s go get something to eat, my treat.”

 

“Okay.” I said meekly.

 

###

 

We walked in silence to a dinner nearby and sat down in a booth, Soon a waitress came by and said. “Good afternoon girls, what can I do for you today?”

 

“I’ll just want a tuna salad and a diet coke please.” Jess said.

 

“And you miss?”

 

“Huh? The same I guess.” I said deciding to not to correct her and cause her embarrassment.

 

“Okay, so its 2 tuna salads and 2 diet cokes, right?”

 

“Right.” we both said at the same time.

 

After the waitress left, Jess looked at me and said. “The waitress thought you were a girl.“

 

“I noticed.” I said and sighed.

 

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

 

“And cause her embarrassment? It happens all the time, I’m getting tired of correcting people.”

 

“Are you sure you are a boy?” She asked me.

 

“Yes I’m sure, do I have to prove it to you?” I asked starting to get angry.

 

“I’m sorry. It’s just that you look so much like a girl that it’s hard to believe you are a boy.”

 

“I think it has to do with my puberty.” I said.

 

“What about it?”

 

“It didn’t start yet.”

 

“Have you seen a doctor about it? It’s not normal to get to 16 without starting puberty.”

 

“No I haven’t. Do you think I should?”

 

“Of course you should. What if there is something wrong with you? The sooner you find out, the sooner you can get it fixed.”

 

“Now you are starting to worry me.”

 

“My parents are doctors, my dad is a GP and my mother is a Pediatrician. If you want you could talk to them first.”

 

“You think they would talk to me?”

 

“I don’t see why not.”

 

“When do you think I should talk to them?”

 

“My mother must be home already, why not right after we leave here?”

 

“This soon?”

 

“Hey, no time like the present.

 

“You are not trying to wind me up, are you?” I asked her.

 

“Why would you think that?”

 

“Because I’m not used to people being nice to me, that’s all. I’m more used to people ignoring me or trying to beat me up.”

 

“You are having a hard time, aren’t you?”

 

At that moment the waitress get back with our orders so I just nodded. We ate in silence because I didn’t know what to say. It’s been so long since someone my age treated me like a friend that I just wanted to savor that feeling.

 

###

 

 

After we finished eating, Jess paid the bill and we walked to her home, once inside she yelled “MOM, I’M HOME!”

 

“Hey sweety, how was school today, her mom asked walking out of the kitchen.

 

“It was great mom, I also made a new friend. Sam, this is my mom. Mom, meet Sam.”

 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Sam. I hope my daughter has treating you well.”

 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Dr. Campbell. She has been great to me.”

 

“That’s good to hear, so are you staying for dinner?”

 

“We just ate a tuna salad, mom.” Jess said.

 

“Well, dinner will only be served at 6 so there is time till then for you to get hungry. Why don’t you girls go make your homework and I’ll call you when dinner is served.”

 

“Huh... mom?”

 

“Yes sweety?”

 

“Sam is not a girl.”

 

“What?” She asked and looked at me

 

“Sam is a boy.”

 

“Oh I’m so sorry, Sam.” She said to me.

 

“Actually that’s why I brought him here, mom. He said his puberty didn’t start yet.”

 

“Is that true?” She asked me.

 

“Yes ma’am.”

 

“My daughter made you open up to her, didn’t she?”

 

“I don’t know how she did it, but she makes you want to trust and talk to her.” I said.

 

“How old are you Sam?”

 

“16 and half ma’am.”

 

“No mam me young man, call me Cathy.” She admonished me.

 

“Okay ma’... I man Cathy.”

 

“That’s better. Why don’t we call your parents and ask them to come have dinner with us?”

 

“It’s just me and my mom, my father died when I was 12 in a car accident.”

 

“I’m sorry, Sam.” Both Jess and her mom said at the same time.

 

“Don’t worry about that, it was a long time ago.” I said.

 

I gave her my home number and soon she was talking with my mother while me and Jess were studying in the living room.

 

“Your mother will be here by 6, Sam. I think Rich will be here by then too.”

 

“Rich?” I asked.

 

“My father.” Jess told me.

 

“Oh great, I just met the girl today and she is introducing me to her parents already. This way I’ll be married by Friday.” I said trying to look serious and Jess started to laugh, and of course that made me laugh too.

 

 

###

 

 

We did our homework and Jess went upstairs to take a shower and change. I could use one too, but I didn’t have a change of clothes. When she came back downstairs she was wearing a tank top and tight shorts. ‘God she is hot.’

 

We went to the kitchen and asked Cathy if she needed any help. “Do you know how to cook?” She asked me.

 

“Yes ma’.. I mean Cathy. I often cook at home. It’s something that relaxes me.”

 

“Okay, then you can help me by chopping the vegetables that are on the table.”

 

“Yes, ma’am.” I said and did a mock salute.

 

Both mother and daughter started to giggle and I went to work on my duty.

 

With everyone helping, cooking became very fun and a pleasant activity, and before we noticed everything was ready and it was almost 6. We set the table want went to the living room wait for the rest to arrive. Like magic, as soon we sat down, Jess’ father arrived and less than a minute later my mom arrived too. Introductions were made and soon we were all having a very nice dinner.

 

“Everything is tastes great tonight Cathy.” Dr. Campbell said.

 

“I had great help.” She said looking at us.

 

“I hoped my son didn’t give you any trouble.” My mom said.

 

“Mooom.”

 

“Son?” I head Dr. Campbell ask.

 

‘Not another one.’ I thought to myself.

 

“I thought Sam was your daughter.” he said.

 

“Actually hon, that’s why Jess brought Sam here today. She met him when she was going to school today and they are in the same homeroom. She got him to open up to her and found out his puberty didn’t start yet.” Cathy said.

 

“How the heck she managed to get all that out of the poor boy?” Dr. Campbell asked impressed.

 

“What can I say? I have a gift.” Jess simply said like it’s no big deal.

 

“So, Jess, why did you bring him to us today?” He asked.

 

“Well, daddy, you know, it isn’t normal to someone to not have like started their puberty when they were over 16, right?”

 

“Right.” He said.

 

“So... Sam is 16 and half years old, but look like he is 13 or 14, so I thought you could like answer some questions or direct him to someone to check him up.”

 

“And I invited his Carla so she could be aware of what’s happening if she didn’t know already.” Cathy said.

 

“I had no idea he was worried about it, he never said anything.” My mother said.

 

“Mom, you already have a lot to worry about and I didn’t want to worry you.” I said.

 

“Oh sweetheart, I’ll always worry about you. You are my baby.” She said hugging me.

 

“Not in front of others mom, please.” I said blushing.

 

I looked at Jess and she was smiling. ‘At least she isn’t laughing at me.’ I thought.

 

 

###

 

 

After dinner, Dr. Campbell said he wanted to see me at the hospital he worked at 8:00 in the morning for a checkup.

 

We said our goodbyes and I promised Jess I would call her tomorrow.

 

Soon we were home and I went upstairs to have a shower and sleep thinking of the appointment tomorrow. ‘I hope there is nothing wrong with me, but if there is I’m sure they will be able to fix it, right?’

   

---

  To be continued....

  

---

I woke up early the next day nervous about the upcoming appointment. I had woken up several times sweating during the night, but again I couldn’t remember my dreams. I went to the bathroom and did my morning routine before changing and going downstairs.

I decided to cook breakfast for mom this morning, cooking always seems to relax me. I made some french toasts, scrambled eggs and a pot of coffee, my mom always liked her coffee black. After I set up the table, I went upstairs to call her.

I opened the door and said. “Mom? Breakfast is ready.”

She stretched, yawned and said “Thank you sweety. What time is it?”

“A little after 6:30”

“I’ll be downstairs in a couple minutes.”

“Okay.” I said and went downstairs.

I went outside and picked up the newspaper, I always loved the comics page. I brought it inside and put it on the living room coffee table. I wonder why is it called coffee table, as I never saw anyone put any coffee mugs or pots on one of those, there is always a pot of flowers or some other garnish in the middle, not to mention that sometimes people also use it to support their feet.

Yes, I am rambling, when nervous I tend to think silly things like that. I read the comics page and damn that Garfield is a funny cat.

My mom came downstairs wearing a bathrobe, and sat down at the table. “Hummmm, that smell delicious.” She said.

I sat down too and said. “Thanks mom.”

We ate and mom went upstairs for a shower and get ready to take me to the hospital. I got up, cleaned up the table and washed the dishes while I waited. Yep, you guessed, anything to avoid thinking about the appointment. The thing is I HATE NEEDLES.

Soon mom got back and we were on our way to the hospital.

###

While we were driving at the hospital my mother asked me. “Are you nervous, sweety?”

“Me? Nervous? A little I guess. What if there is something wrong with me?”

“I hope there is nothing wrong with you, but if there is I’m sure they will be able to fix it, right?”

“I guess.” I said dejectedly.

Arriving at the hospital, we quickly found a parking spot and went inside, there a receptionist directed us to the 3rd floor. We got the elevator and on the 3rd floor another receptionist said we would be called soon.

I rummaged through the magazines there, but nothing appealed to me, specially because I couldn’t find anything newer than 6 months ago. What do they want? Kill us with boredom or make us sick so they can get more money? Those magazines must be filled with germs and bacterias of hundreds of people. I bet that some guys even went to the bathroom and didn’t wash their hands before reading the magazines, ewwww.

“Everything is going to be fine sweety.” My mom said reassuringly and hugged me.

A few minutes later the receptionist/secretary, called my name and we went into Dr. Campbell office.

“Good morning, Sam, Mrs Evans.” he said greeting us.

“Good morning doc.” I said

“Good morning, Dr. Campbell.” My mother said.

“As we discussed last night, you are worried that your puberty didn’t start yet, right? Today I will perform a physical exam and collect some blood to do some tests, that hopefully will give us some answers.” said.

‘Dammit! I knew there would be needles involved.’

“Okay, young man, why don’t you go to the exam room, strip down and put on the gown that is there, I’ll be there with a nurse in a couple minutes.” He told me.

I went to the exam room and changed into a blue hospital gown. ‘These things are ugly and thin as paper, and somewhat uncomfortable, and why my ass is not covered? Oh oh, he won’t do a rectal exam, will he?’

Soon the Dr. came inside together with a nurse. He measured me, weighted me, probed me and I think the nurse took out a gallon of blood. Not that I saw it, because my head was turned to the other side and my eyes were shut all the time while she was taking my blood. Luckily there was no rectal exam this time.

Oh, they made me pee in a cup too, for a urine test.

After I put my clothes back, I went to the office and the Dr. was there talking to my mother.

I sat down beside her and he said. “Apparently you are very healthy, though slightly underdeveloped young boy. Your testes didn’t descent yet, but they are there. Now we have to wait for the test results come back, we can see where to go from there.”

“So you mean there is nothing wrong with me?”

“Other than the underdevelopment I didn’t find anything wrong, and if the test results come back the way I think they will, I think we could try to kick-start your puberty.”

“How?” Me and mom asked.

“Usually giving a shot of testosterone, starts the maturation process of the gonads, starting that way the puberty.”

Gulp, another needle. Just my luck.

“Couldn’t you give me one of those shots now and be over with it?” I asked

“First we need to wait for the test results to come back to see your current hormonal level. If the testosterone levels are low then we can try to use the shot.”

“And what if the testosterone levels are normal?” My mother asked.

“If the levels are normal, then it could mean Sam has some level of AIS.”

“AIS?” my mother asked

“Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome, meaning that if he has it, no matter how much testosterone we try to inject it won’t do any good because with the AIS the androgen receptors are defective.”

“So if I have that AIS thing what does it mean?”

“I think its too soon to say you have it, but if you do you probably have a form of PAIS that is a Partial Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome as you do have all the male genitals. But depending of how severe it is, it means that your body will never develop to be a man’s body and your body will slowly start to feminize itself because even men has small amounts of estrogen in their bodies.”

“You mean that I would become a woman?” I asked scared about the answer.

“As I said its too early to tell, we need to wait for the results to know where to go from there. I personally think that AIS or PAIS is not the case here. I think what you have is just a hormone deficiency.”

“When do you expect the results to come back, Dr.?” My mother asked.

“The hormone levels will take just a few hours, If you want we could meet again today at 5:00PM after my last appointment.”

“Thank you Dr.” My mother said.

“You are welcome, Mrs. Evans. It’s no big deal, really. I’m doing this as a favor to my daughter, she liked Sam very much.”

“I liked her very much too, Sir.” I said and blushed when I noticed who I just said that to.

“You seem like a very polite and nice boy, Sam, my daughter is lucky to have met you. But don’t tell her I said that. If you do I will deny, after all I still have a father image to uphold.” He said and laughed.

“Okay doc, I won’t tell her, it will be our secret.” I said and shook his hand to seal the deal.

“Deal.” he said shocking my hand.

###

We left the hospital in a foul mood, worried about what might be wrong with me. ‘What if I have that PAIS or AIS thing? Won’t I ever become a man? What does it mean?’

My mother seemed to pick up on my mood and said. “Don’t worry, sweety. You heard what the doctor said, it is probably a hormone deficiency, but if it isn’t just remember something, whatever happens, my love for you will never change, Okay?”

“Okay.” I said meekly.

###

The rest of the trip home we were silent, I wasn’t in the talking mood and mom probably noticed that and soon we were home.

I went to my bedroom and played some computer games to take my mind of what happened this morning and avoid thinking about what is about to happen later today. Yes I did want to search for more information on AIS and PAIS but I was scared of what I might find, so call me a coward if you want to.

At noon, mom called me to lunch, she had made one of my favorite dishes, beef and french fries. Yes I am a boy with simple tastes, well... almost, I do like to eat my french fries with mayo.

After lunch I went to the living room watch some TV, I zapped around the channels but there was nothing interesting in it.

Around 2 I was already bored and the anxiety about the upcoming appointment was getting into me. I went to my mom and said. “Mom, I think I’m going to meet Jess at the school gate, can you pick me up at her home for us to go to the hospital later?”

“Sure sweety, I’ll pick you up there around 4:00.”

“Thanks mom.” I said and gave her a peck on her cheek.

###

I texted Jess, telling her to meet me at the school gate after class and started to walk. I decided to do a long way because there was still some time until the end of class, but still I arrived about 15 minutes early, so I sat down on the stairs (out of the way of course) and waited for her.

A few minutes after the final bell Jess came outside running and gave me a big hug. More than a few raised eyebrows could be seen looking at us, but I didn’t care. I had other things in my mind.

“So how did it go this morning?”

“I’ll tell you on the way to your home, Jess.” Mom will pick me up in about a hour there to go back to the hospital.”

“There is nothing wrong, I hope” She said worriedly and we started walking.

“Probably not, he think it might be just a hormone deficiency and I probably need a testosterone shot to kickstart things.”

“So why the long face? There is something you are not telling me, isn’t it?”

“Gosh, there is no way to hide things from you, is there?”

“No way whatsoever.” She said with a smile.

“Well... he said if it isn’t an hormonal deficiency it might be PAIS, AIS or something like that, and said if it is the case I will never develop to be a man.” I said feeling tears beginning to form.

“You mean, Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome?” she asked me.

“Yes, do you know about it?” I asked her.

“I read about it. I want to become a doctor someday, so I usually read my parents periodics.”

“A smart girl, I like that.”

“You silly.” She said, slapped me on my arm and giggled.

“So do you want to know about AIS?” She asked me a couple minutes later.

“Actually not right now, maybe after we get to your home and I have a place to sit down.”

“Okay”

###

We arrived at her home and again she yelled telling her mom she was back home.

I think she will end up making me deaf someday.

Her mom came and greeted us. She asked me how things went and I told her all that happened in the hospital. After I finished she said. “Rich is probably right, but if it ends up being PAIS you might have a hard choice to make.”

“What kind of choice?” I asked already dreading the answer.

“The choice of not doing anything and have your body slowly feminizing itself, giving you more and more an androgynous to female looking appearance, with serious health issues in a few years, like osteoporosis due to the lack of hormones, or you can go the female way and start a hormone replacement therapy and your body will develop like any other girl.”

“You mean, become a girl?”

“Yes, the choice in that case would be between a feminine looking sick boy or a healthy girl.”

“So that wouldn’t be really a choice would it? I mean its a choice of a long healthy life against a life where any fall I could break a bone and die young, right.”

“It is a choice none the less, Sam. It will all depend of what you decide to do.”

“But I don’t know a thing about being a girl, and after last year, I don’t think anyone will accept me anyway?” I said starting to feel the tears running down my cheeks again.

“What happened last year, Sam?” Jess asked me holding me tightly.

“I can’t tell, you will hate me if I do.” I said crying.

“Unless you killed someone there is no way I can hate you.” She told me reassuringly.

“You can tell us, Sam.” Dr. Cathy said also holding me.

“Okay. (sniff)”

“You met Stephanie, right?” I asked Jess.

“The girl that sits in front of me at homeroom?”

“Yes. Until last year we were the best of friends since preschool. She lives just a few houses from mine and we were practically inseparable.”

“Why aren’t you two still friends? She seems like a nice girl.”

“Because that what happened last year was her fault, and because of that the bullying became even worse since then. And even the girls don’t talk to me anymore or ignore me.”

“What happened last year after all?”

“Well, it was a few weeks to Halloween and we were at her house planning what would we wear for the school’s party and she had the idea of me trying up one of her cheerleader uniforms.” I said looking at the floor blushing.

“So you went to the party dressed as a cheerleader and something happened there?” Jess asked.

“No, I never went to the party.”

“So what happened.”

“Well, she convinced me to try the outfit and she did my hair and put some makeup for the finishing touches. When I looked at the mirror It was a mix of shock and fascination, as I did look like a girl. We took some pictures and I changed back into my regular clothes before going home.”

“Until then I don’t see anything wrong, it was for Halloween, right? And even if it wasn’t there is nothing wrong with that.” Dr. Cathy said and Jess nodded.

“The next day I met Steph and we walked together to school like we always did, everything seemed normal until we reached the school. Kids everywhere were pointing at me and laughing saying ‘Look at the sissy’ and other things that I don’t even dare to repeat. When I reached my locker, glued on the door were the pictures we took the day before and the whole school got copies.” I said breaking down again. “She was my best friend dammit! Why did she do that to me?”

Both mother and daughter stood there hugging me while I cried. I think Jess was crying a little too.

###

A few minutes later I was finally getting my shit back together and the doorbell rang. It was my mother.

“Are you ready to go, sweety?” She asked me.

“Yeah, I guess.” I said. “Jess, can you go with me?”

“Are you sure you want me to?” She asked me.

“Yeah, you kinda make me feel safe, please?”

“Of course I will go with you. I mean, if my mom approves.” She said looking at her mom with puppy dog eyes.

“You can go, Jess, and the puppy dog eyes only work on your father.”

“Thank you, mom.” She said hugging her mother and giving her a kiss on her cheek.

###

We arrived at the hospital and went to the 3rd floor again, during all that time Jess was holding my hand reassuringly.

We sat down on the waiting room and I told her my thoughts about the magazines I had that morning. When I did so, she dropped the magazine she had in her hands and said. “Ewww. I’m never touching a magazine in a waiting room ever again.”

A few minutes later we were directed to the doctor’s office and when we entered Jess run to her father, jumped and gave him a peck on his cheek.

“Hi daddy.”

“Hi princess, what are you doing here?

“Sam asked me to come for support, it’s okay, isn’t it?”

“Sure it is, princess.”

We all sat down and Jess hold my hand tightly again. The doctor then said. “I got the tests results and you do have a hormonal deficiency, all other tests returned normal. I think we can do the hormone shot to kickstart your puberty young man.”

“When can I have it?” I said eagerly even though I was dreading the needle, but if it helps me, I’ll deal with it.

“Right now actually, lets go to the exam room away from the girls because the shot is on an embarrassing area for you.” He said and Jess giggled.

“Okay” I said following him to the exam room. There I lowered my pants a little, he cleaned one of my ass cheeks with a wet cotton with what I think smelled like alcohol and gave me the shot. Ouch! That hurts. I hope I don’t need another one of those.

We returned to his office and I decided to stand up, my behind was a little sore and I guess Jess noticed because she was still giggling.

“I want to see you next month to check up on your progress, Sam. Right now we did all we could.” He said and shook my hand.

“Thanks for everything doctor.” I said.

“You are welcome, son.”

“Lets go home mom. Come Jess, lets celebrate.” I said happily.

“Don’t worry Dr. Campbell, I’ll take good care of your daughter, my mom will see to it.” I said laughing.

“Okay son. I want her home by 9, it’s a school night after all.”

“Bye daddy.” Jess said happily.

###

We were reaching the elevator when I started to feel dizzy. “Mom, I don’t feel so good.” I said.

“What’s wrong, Sam?”

“I’m feeling strange, dizzy, it’s... getting... hard... to breath.”

“I’ll go get my dad.” Jess said and run.

“Hold on, Sam, help is on the way.”

It was the last thing I heard before everything went dark

---

To Be Continued...

  

---

(Jessica)

I ran back to daddy’s office and when I opened the door I said “Daddy, daddy come quick! Sam is not well.”

I didn’t even had to say that again, he was out the door in a flash and we run back to Sam. Things became a little hazy for me after that. I didn’t see much of what happened next. I saw my dad yelling something and a lot of other people running around and quickly taking Sam away.

Someone directed Sam’s mom and me to a waiting room and we stayed there hugging and crying for a long time. After the tears were gone we stayed there waiting in silence hoping that Sam would get better.

I don’t know how long we waited, but it seemed like ages when daddy came back. “Daddy!!!” I yelled and hugged him tightly. “How is he? Is he going to be okay?”

“How is my son, Dr?” His mother asked.

“He is going to be okay Mrs. Evans. He got a severe allergic reaction to the testosterone and went into an anaphylactic shock, but we were able to stabilize him.”

“So is he going to be fine?”

“Yes, Mrs. Evans, he is going to be just fine. But I’m still worried though.”

“Why? What’s wrong with my son?”

“For such a extreme allergic reaction to occur his body had to be already sensitive to the allergen, meaning that he was probably developing an allergy to his own testosterone and the shot just triggered it.”

“What does it mean?” She asked worriedly.

“It means we need to do some more tests to know for sure he is allergic to his own testosterone and if he is, we will need to remove his testicles.” He said dejectedly.

“My poor baby! Can I see him?” She asked trying to appear strong.

“He is in the recovery room unconscious, we don’t know yet when he will wake up, but you can see him for a few minutes.”

He then directed her to the recovery room. A few minutes later he came back alone, sat down beside me and hugged me. “How are you feeling princess?”

“I’m worried about him, daddy. Why did that had to happen to him?”

“I don’t know, but I suspect he will probably need a lot of support soon.”

“I will be there for him as long as he needs me to, daddy.”

“Don’t get me wrong princess, but you hardly know the boy. You just met him yesterday. Did he had that strong impression on you?”

“Yes, daddy. I don’t know why, but I liked him from the moment we bumped into each other. There is something special about him.”

“Are you in love with him?”

“I... well... I... think so.” I said blushing.

“Okay sweety, I won’t ask anything more right now, but you can always talk to me, you know that, don’t you?”

“Yes daddy, I know.” I said giving him a peck on the cheek.

“Is Sam really going to be okay, daddy?

“Physically yes, beyond that I don’t know.”

“Why?”

“If he is allergic to testosterone, he will never develop as a man and if he doesn’t start some sort of hormonal therapy he will have a lot of health problems.”

“You mean like female hormones?”

“Yes, sweety. And how do you feel about that?”

“Daddy, boy or girl Sam will still be Sam, for me there is no difference. And we were talking this afternoon about what if he needed to have to take female hormones.”

“And what did he say?”

“He said it wasn’t really a choice, become a healthy girl or a sick feminine boy. He is afraid though.”

“I would be too in his situation sweety.”

A few minutes later Sam’s mom came back and sat with us. “What do I do now?” She asked.

“There is nothing you can do right now, Mrs Evans. He will probably be sleeping for a long time yet. The best thing you can do is to go home, and sleep a little.”

“I don’t want to leave my baby’s side. He will need me when he wakes up.” She said crying.

“I don’t believe he will wake up soon, try to sleep at least a few hours and be back first thing in the morning.”

“I don’t want to be alone in that house tonight.” she said.

“Daddy, can she come to our house tonight? I don’t think she should be alone tonight either.” I said.

“What do you think, Mrs. Evans?”

“I don’t want to impose, Dr. Campbell.”

“You are not imposing, Mrs. Evans, and call me Richard.”

“Only if you call me Carla.”

“Come on Mrs. Evans, come with us tonight. Daddy can even bring you back here tomorrow morning. You won’t even need to drive.”

“Okay Jessica, but only because I really don’t want to be in that house alone tonight.”

“Daddy, can we go now?”

“Yes sweety, my shift ended a few hours ago.”

When we got home, mom was waiting for us in the living room.

“Hi Carla, how are you feeling?” She asked

“I’m so worried Cathy, he is all I have.” She said in tears.

“Don’t worry, Mrs. Evans. You heard my dad, he is going to be fine.”

“But how? He was just so happy when he got that shot thinking he would finally start to grow to be a man and that happens. How will he react when he learn the news?”

“I might have known him for a couple days, but I’m sure he will adapt, he is stronger than he appears.”

“I hope so, Jess. I really hope so.”

I woke up early the next day, still worried about Sam. It was a very hard night, It took me forever to sleep and I kept waking up all night long.

I went to the bathroom and had a nice bath trying to relax and it did help a little. After I left the bath I dried myself, changed and went downstairs to have breakfast. Everyone there already.

“Good morning.” I said.

“Good morning.” they all said back

Everyone seemed a bit down this morning, and we were all eating in silence when I said. “Daddy, can I go to the hospital with you and Mrs. Evans?”

“You should go to school, princess. There is nothing you can do at the hospital this morning.”

“But what if he wakes up? I want to be there when he does.”

“I don’t think he will wake up this morning.”

“Daddy? What are you not telling me?” I asked and noticed Mrs. Evans start to cry. “Is he okay? What happened?”

“I called the hospital a little while ago. Sam had a very difficult night.”

“What do you mean by that? What happened, daddy, please tell me.” I said crying.

“He had another shock during the night and went into cardiac arrest. The doctors were able to stabilize him again, but if we don’t operate him soon, It will probably happen again.”

“Operate? You mean take out his testicles?”

“Yes sweety, unfortunately there is nothing else we can do.”

“I still want to go to the hospital, daddy. I want to see him.”

“What if I pick you up at school as soon the classes are over and take you to the hospital?” Mom asked.

“I guess... but I don’t think I’ll be able to concentrate much today.”

I went to school and the morning went in a kind of blur, I couldn’t pay attention to what the teachers were saying. At lunch time Steph came to me and said. “Jess, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Why?” I asked not in the mood to deal with her right now.

“Please, It will only take a minute.” She pleaded

“Okay, what do you want?” I said coldly.

“I wanted to ask you if Sam is okay. It’s not like him to miss school.”

“And why do you care?” I spat

“Jesus girl, what is wrong with you. Why are you being like that?” she said.

“What’s wrong with me? I should ask you the same question.” I spat back

“What did I do to you for you to treat me like this?”

“To me, nothing, but Sam told me what YOU did to him. How could you do something like that?”

She then sat down and started to cry.

“Why are you crying? Feeling guilty?”

“You (sob) wouldn't understand.(sob)”

“I’m crying because I miss him so much, and that he never even gave me the chance to explain what actually happened.”

“What there is to explain? You dress him up one afternoon, take some pictures spread them around and the next day they are all over the school.”

“It wasn't me that did it, okay? It was my asshole brother. After Sam left that day, my mom called me to help her with dinner and I went downstairs to help her. I didn’t have the time that night to transfer the pictures to my computer. The next morning I met him and we walked together to the school like every other day, he is very funny and always made me laugh, and that day was no different. When we reached the school was when things got strange, people were pointing at him, laughing and calling names. We reached his locker and to my shock the pictures we took the previous day were glued all over it. I tried to talk to him, but he looked at me with the saddest eyes I ever seen and ran away from me. I found out later that my brother had picked up the camera and emailed the pictures to all his friends.”

“Why didn’t you try to talk to Sam and explain what happened then?”

“I tried, Jess. I tried for several weeks. Tried to talk to him at school, tried to phone him, email him and even tried going to his house, but he refused to talk to me.”

“And your brother?”

“He was a senior at the time and now he is away in college. I haven’t talked to him since he did that to Sam and ruined our friendship. Now that I told you what really happened, please tell me if you know if he is okay.”

“What makes you think I know anything?”

“Come on, I’m not blind. He didn’t came to school yesterday, but when the final bell rang, he was outside waiting for you. I saw how you hugged him. And the way you were acting today tells me it has something to do with Sam, am I right?”

“Yes, you are right, I know where he is.”

“Is he okay?”

“Not really, he is in the hospital, he almost died last night.” I said feeling the tears starting to flow.

“WHAT? Which hospital? I have to see him.” She said.

“My mother will pick me up after school, if you want you can come with us to the hospital.”

“Please, I need to see him.” she said pleadingly.

---

To Be Continued...

  

---

  
(Jessica)
  
After the final bell, Steph and I walked outside together to meet mom.

“Hi mom, this is Stephanie.” I said.

“THE Stephanie?” Mom asked raising an eyebrow.

“Yes mom, we talked and she explained what really happened. She wasn’t the one that spread the pictures, it was her asshole brother.” I said.

“Jess! Language!” Mom admonished me.

“Sorry, mom, but he is.”

“And I second that.” Steph said.

“Mom, Steph wants to go to the hospital with us.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” She asked me.

“I don’t know mom, but she is worried about him too, wouldn’t be fair to her to not have any news and he will need all the support we can get.” I said and Steph looked at me confused.

“Okay, Jess. It’s your call. Let’s go.”

We entered the car and soon we were on our way.

“What do you mean he will need all the support we can get?” Steph whispered to me.

“I’ll tell you later, okay?” I whispered back.

“Okay.”

  

  

We arrived at the hospital and went to find Dad to get some news and try to find Mrs. Evans. We found him and he took us to see Sam and his mom.

“How is he doing, Daddy?”

“The operation went fine and he is still asleep, but I think he might wake up soon.”

“That’s good, isn’t it?” Steph asked.

“Yes it is.” He said.

We arrived at his room and his mother was seated on a chair beside his bed and she looked very tired.

“Hi Mrs. Evans, have you been here all morning?” I said.

She turned her head and said. “Oh, hi Jess, ever since he came back from surgery.”
“Hi Mrs. Evans.” Steph said meekly

“Steph, what are you doing here? I thought you and Sam weren’t friends anymore after what you did to him.” she said angrily.

“Mrs. Evans, I talked to her and found out what really happened, she was not at fault, but Sam was too hurt to listen to her side of the story.” I said.

“Is it true?” She asked Steph.

“Yes, Mrs. Evans. My brother did it, and I haven’t spoken with him every since. He destroyed the one thing that I treasure the most, my friendship with Sam.” She said trying holding back her tears.

“It’s good to know you aren’t responsible for what happened Steph, specially now that he will need all the friends he can get to support him.”

“What happened to him? No one told me anything yet, just that he was in the hospital. What kind of surgery he had?” She asked and Mrs. Evans faced dropped.

“What happened Steph, is that he will have to make a hard decision in order to have a normal healthy life.” Her mother said crypticaly.

“I don’t understand.” Steph said confused.

“Yesterday we came in the morning to find out why his puberty haven’t started yet and the doctors discovered he had a hormone deficiency, and in the afternoon he got a testosterone shot to kickstart it.”

“That’s a good thing, isn’t it. But why he had to have surgery?”

“A few minutes after the shot he started to feel ill and collapsed. The doctors suspected he had an allergic reaction to the testosterone shot, but stabilized him. During the night he had another one and once again the doctors managed to save him, but they found out he developed an allergy to his own testosterone.” she said

“Oh my. Does it means the operation he had was to remove his...” she said raising her hands to her mouth.

“His testicles, yes.” I told her and Mrs. Evans started to cry again.

“My poor baby. Why did that have to happen to him.” She said.

Steph turned to me and asked. “What does it means to him?” She looked very worried.

“It means he will never grow to be a man because his body will reject any testosterone, his only option for a healthy normal life is to take female hormones.”

“You mean, turn him into a girl?”

“Yes, but it has to be his decision.” I said.

“Oh my, poor Sam, he didn’t deserve to have to make such a decision like this.”
  

  
(Stephanie)

“Mrs. Evans, did you eat anything today?” I asked.

“No, Steph. I been here all day.”

“Why don’t you and Jessica go to the cafeteria and eat something, I’ll be here with him. There are some things I need to tell him, even if he can’t hear me.” I told her.

“I think I could eat somethig. Thank you Steph. I’ll be back soon.”

“Thanks Mrs. Evans.” I said.

“Call me aunt Carla like you used to, Steph, and you too Jess.”

“Okay aunt Carla, thank you.” I said.

After they left I sat down beside him and holded his hands. “Hi Sam, I can’t tell you how much I missed you. I wish we had never taken those pictures. What my brother did to you was unforgivable. That day was the worst day of my life, when you looked at me like that and ran away I felt like I had lost a piece of myself. There isn’t one day that I don’t remember the look in your eyes, Sam. There is nothing in my life I valued most than your friendship, you were like a brother to me, even closer than my real brother. I hope that someday we can be friends again.”

I cleaned up my eyes and took his hand again, I felt it move, squeezing my hand and I heard a faint voice.

“Steph?”

  

---

  
To be continued....

  

  

---

  
(Sam)
  

“Steph?” I croaked and opened my eyes

“I’m here Sam”

“Hi.” I said weekly

“How are you feeling?”

“Woozy, confused, thirsty.”

“Here, drink this. Slowly.” She said giving me a glass of water.

“Thank you.”

“I missed you so much!” she exclaimed and gave me a hug.

“Is it true?”

“What?”

“That it was your brother that did that?”

“You heard that?”

I nodded.

“Yes, it is true. I didn’t talk to him ever since. I’m glad he is away at the uni.” she said with anger.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For not letting you explain what happened before.”

“Don’t worry about it Sam, I would have probably done the same thing if I were you.”

“Why am I in the hospital, by the way.” I asked her confused.

“What do you remember?” She asked me.

“Coming to the hospital and get a shot, feeling ill and then nothing. How long was I out? And why do I feel like I was kicked in the nuts?” I asked and her face fell.

“You were unconscious for about 24 hours.”

“Wow. Did I sleep that long?”

We better wait for your mom to come back and call the doctor to explain what happened, Sam.”

“You are scaring me, Steph. What happened. I can see it in your face that something did happen.”

“Please, Sam. It will be better if the doctor tell you what happened, I can’t really explain it to you.”

“Am I dying?” I asked worriedly.

“No Sam, you are not dying nor you are sick.”

“Then why am I in here?”

“Please Sam, just wait a few minutes, okay?” she said and hugged me tightly.

“Okay Steph, just don’t leave me alone, please.” I said pleadingly.

“Oh Sam, you have no idea how much I missed you this past year.”

“I missed you too Steph, every single day.”

“Please, promise me something, Sam.”

“What?”

“Whatever happens, lets never be apart like that again, I wouldn't be able to handle something like that again.” She said in tears.

“I promise.” I said still hugging her.

  

  

A few minutes later mom came back with Jess.

“Sweety, you are awake.” Mom said.

“SAM!” Jess yelled. “You got me so worried.” she said and hugged me REALLY tight.

“Jess.” I said

“What?”

“I can’t breath.”

“Oops, sorry.” She said and hugged me not so tightly.

“I see you and Steph made up.” Mom said.

“Yeah.” I said and Steph nodded happily.

“Mom, what happened?” I asked her.

“I better call the doctor.” She said with a sad face.

“I’ll go get my dad.” Jess said.

“Thank you, Jess.” My mom said and Jess went to find her dad.

“How are you feeling, sweety?”

“Still a little woozy and I feel like someone kicked me in the nuts.” I said

“Language, young man.” Mom admonished me.

“Sorry, mom.”

  

  

Jess came back a few minutes later with Dr. Campbell.

“Hello Sam, how are you feeling?” He asked me.

“This seems to be the question of the day Doc. Everyone keeps asking me that. I’m a bit woozy, confused and I feel like someone kicked me in the... testicles.” I said and looked at my mom. “What happened?” I asked him.

“How much do you remember, Sam?” He asked me.

“Not much, I remember coming to see you, getting a shot and feeling I’ll a few minutes later. After that, it’s a blank.”

“There is no easy way to tell you this Sam, but you had a very strong allergic reaction to the shot, going into anaphylactic shock. Later that night, you entered into another shock this time caused by your own testosterone and went into cardiac arrest.”

“You mean I almost died?” I said interrupting him.

“Yes Sam.”

“Will it happen again?” I said feeling scared.

“We had to operate you so it wouldn’t happen again.”

“Operate me? What kind of operation?”

“We had to perform a bilateral orchiectomy.”

“And that means?”

“We had to remove your testicles, Sam.” He said sadly.

“You had to do what?” I asked and I felt Jess and Steph holding my hands.

“I’m sorry Sam, if we didn’t do that you could die. You are allergic to testosterone.”

“What does it mean?” I asked feeling faint, my mother was in tears now.

“It means you can't go through a male puberty. I'm sorry.”

  

  
(Jessica)
  

After daddy said that he would never be able to go through a boy’s puberty, I looked at Sam and he just stood there looking at nothing for a long time.

“Sam? Are you okay?” I asked him and he just stayed there without moving.

“Sam? Can you hear me?” nothing.

“What happened?” I asked daddy.

“I think he is just in shock right now.” He said. “He will probably go out of it by himself in a few minutes. If anything happens, call me, okay?”

“Okay daddy.”

  

  

(Sam)

I don’t know how long I stayed there without moving, I could hear them talking to me, but it sounded so far away. 'What will happen to me now? Why did that have to happen to me? What did I do to deserve this?'

I then started to cry and felt Steph, Jess and Mom hugging me.

“Mom? What will happen to me now?” I asked in tears.

“Oh sweety, whatever happens it will have to be your choice. Just remember that I will support you whatever you choose.”

“We will also support you, Sam.” Jess said and Steph nodded.

“Why do I feel like my life is over?” I asked.

“It’s not over, It is just changing, sweety.” Mom said.

“Will I have to make the choice we were talking yesterday?” I asked Jess.

“I’m afraid so, Sam.” She told me.

“So it’s not really a choice is it? If I want to have a healthy normal life, I mean.”

“You will always have a choice, Sam, and I will be at your side whatever you choose.” Jess told me.

“I guess. But before I choose I need to tell you something, Jess.” I said and blushed.

“What is it?”

“I think I fell in love with you, not that it will matters now anyway, but I had to get it out of my chest.” I said and started to cry again.

She looked at me in the eyes and suddenly she kissed me on the lips.

“I also fell in love with you Sam, and whatever you choose that wont change, I’ll be with you either way.” She said and kissed me again.

  

---

  
To be continued....

 

  

---

  

When our lips parted I was crying again, not from sadness or anger this time, but because I was happy that she felt the same way about me.

“What's wrong, Sam? Why are you crying?” Jess asked me.

“Nothing is wrong, Jess. I’m just happy you feel the same way about me. Is it true that no matter what I choose to do that won't change?”

“Yes it is, gender was never a big deal for me, what matters for me is the person itself. Do you believe in love at first sight?”

“I do, Jess. When I first saw you, I think I fell for you that very same moment.” I said blushing.

“So did I Sam, and at that time I did think you were a girl. When I found out you were a boy my feelings for you didn't change.”

“You did seem angry though.” I said.

“I was but after we talked I saw that you didn't lie to me. It was all my own misunderstanding.”

  

  

“Mom?”

“Yes, sweety?”

“What would you think if I decided to be a girl?” I asked her.

“I would love you the same way sweety.” She affirmed and hugged me.

“Good, because I do want to live a normal healthy life.” I finally said.

“Are you sure about that, sweety?” She asked.

I thought for a moment and said. “Yes, its not like I never thought about it before.”

“WHAT?” All three women said at the same time.

  

  

After a few minutes of an awkward silence mom said. “You mean you though about it before?”

“Yes. It just came back to me. I used to think that all the time.” I admitted. “Just not since....” and I broke down crying.

“It's okay, sweety. I'm here. You can tell us.” She said holding me.

“No I can't, you'll hate me if I do.” I said in tears.

“Look at me, sweety. You are my child and there is no way I could ever hate you. I will always love you.” She said looking deeply into my eyes.

“Do you promise?”

“Of course I do.”

“I didn't think about it since dad died because he died because of me.” I said crying.

“No, sweety. He died in a car accident. It was not your fault.” She said.

“No, mom, it was my fault. That day I was alone at home and I was trying out some of your clothes when he got home and saw me dressed up. He kept yelling at me and said he would go out for a drive and that I better be out of those closes when he came back or he would spank me. I changed back to my clothes and put all your things back. I went to my room and started to cry. A few hours later we got the news that dad died and it was all my fault. If it wasn't for me he would have never gone out and be still alive.”

“Oh sweety, Why didn't you tell me? I knew you tried on my clothes sometimes but I thought it was a phase, when you stopped I thought I was right. And your fathers death was not your fault, you can't blame yourself for his actions.” She said holding me tightly

“Because I thought you would hate me. When he died I promised myself that I would be the best boy I could be and make him proud, but I was never good at that and I thought that when puberty started I would became a better boy, one that would make dad proud.”

“That's not true. You are a great boy.” Steph said.

“It isn't? Steph, I know you always saw me like a sister, and I secretly loved it. When you dressed me up in that cheerleader uniform was the only time I dressed up since dad died and It was because you wanted me to do it for Halloween. I thought that it wouldn't hurt to do it just that once. I was so conflicted then, I did want to do it, but also I was ashamed of myself for wanting it so badly. I think that's why I was so hurt when those pictures came out.”

“I'm sooooooo sorry my brother did that to you, Sam. You didn't deserve that.” Steph said crying.

“It was not your fault, Steph. I should have known you would never do that to me.” I said crying too and we hugged.

  

  

“Life is strange, you know?” I said a few minutes later.

“How so?” Jess asked me.

“I guess I was never meant to be a boy. I tried to because of dad even though I was conflicted about it. In the end I guess the decision was made for me and I don't know if I would ever be able to make a choice it if all this didn't happen to me.”

“Are you sure about it, sweety?” Mom asked me.

“Yes mom, its the only way I'll ever have a normal, healthy and hopefully happy life. I hope it doesn't change how you guys feel about me.”

“No way, Sam.” Jess said and gave me a gentle kiss on my lips.

“I will always love you, sweety.” Mom said. “I loved you as a son and I will love you as a daughter.” She said and hugged me.

“I think it might change a bit.” Steph said.

“What?” I asked.

“Now we do get to be like sisters.” She said and giggled.

“Oh, I guess you are right.” I said.

“You will always be my best friend, Sam. I'll always be there for you.” Steph said hugging me.

“T..thank you guys.” I said trying to hold back the tears.

"You know it will not be easy, right? There are a lot of people that won't understand you and many will give you a hard time because of it." Mom said.

"I know mom, but I think that with you guys supporting me I'll be able to cope with it." I said and grabbed Jess and Seph's hands.

My stomach choose that moment to growl loudly and that set us all in a giggle fit. “I guess someone is hungry.” Mom said. “I’ll see if I can get the nurse to bring you dinner.”

“Thanks mom. I feel like I didn’t eat since yesterday.”

“That’s because you didn’t, silly.” Jess said playfully slapping me on the arm.

  

---

  
To be continued....

 

  

---

  

After my dinner, Dr. Campbell came in to check on me.

“How are you feeling, Sam?”

“I’m feeling fine, doc. I can’t wait to go home though.”

“We are just going to keep you overnight for observation and you’ll be able to go home tomorrow morning after your consultation with the psychiatrist.”

“A shrink? What for?”

“She will help you to cope with whatever decision you make.”

“I already made my decision, doc.”

“Oh, and what was your decision?”

“I want to have a healthy life. I’m scared senseless about becoming a girl though.”

“It’s understandable. I think you are a very brave person to do it though.”

“Thank you doc.”

  

  

A little after that, mom, Jess and Steph came back from the cafeteria.

“Hi sweety, how was the food?” Mom asked.

“Tasteless.”

“I think we have something to cheer you up.” Steph said.

“What is it?”

Jess then gave me a bar of my favorite chocolate.

“Ohhhh thank you.” I said ripping the packing.

“Aren’t you going to give us a piece?” Jess asked me.

“Hmmmm.... maybe. if you are good enough.” I said.

“And what do I have to do then?” She said almost purring.

“Give me a hug? Can’t be much more with the parental unit present.” I said making a puppy dog eye look.

“Sam!” Mom said and laughed.

“You are feeling pretty nervous, aren’t you?” Steph asked me.

“Why do you say that?” I asked back.

“When you are nervous you start making jokes and acting silly. Did you forget we grew up together? I know all your tricks Sam.”

“Yes, I am nervous. I am scared senseless, actually.”

“What are you scared of?” Mom asked.

“Everything. Myself, my decision, I don’t know. I’m so confused right now.”

“We are right here with you Sam. Things will get better I promise you.” Jess said holding me tightly.

“Thank you guys.” I said and yawned.

“I think its time for us to go, you need to get some sleep. It was a very stressful day for you. I’ll see you tomorrow, sweety.” Mom said and gave me a kiss on my forehead.

“Thanks mom. I love you.”

“I love you too, sweety.”

Steph came closer to me and whispered. “Good night sis.” and gave me a peck on the cheek and I blushed.

Jess gave me a light kiss on my lips and said. “Good night, lover. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay.” I said with a smile.

After they left I lay down on the bed and looked at the ceiling. ‘With them supporting me I think I might just make it.’ I thought to myself and soon was asleep.

  

  

*I’m walking down a beach, I can feel a nice summer breeze blowing, the sun is setting over the ocean and I feel the warm sand between my toes and I hear the sound of the waves. I walk for a bit, and adjust the skirt I’m wearing before sitting down and I look at the ocean, watching that beautiful sunset.

“Hi Sam.” I hear a familiar voice say behind me.

“Hi Jess. Come sit here with me.” I said patting the spot next to me.

She sat down beside me and we cuddled together enjoying each other’s company and watching the sunset. It is a perfect moment. I am happy and beside the one I love.

Jess looks at me and soon our lips met. We embrace each other and we kiss for a long time and the world around us cease to exist, at that moment, there are just the two of us and nothing else matters.

She looks deeply into my eyes and she says. “I love you, Samantha.”

“I love you too, Jessica.” I say to her and we kiss again and again and again.*

  

  

I wake up smiling, thinking about the dream I had and how good it felt before starting to cry.

A nurse come inside the room and asks “What’s wrong, honey? Why are you crying?”

“Nothing... (sob) is wrong. It’s just a dream.” I said.

“Bad dream?”

“No, good one.”

“So why are you crying?” She asked me confused.

“Because I remembered it. I haven’t remembered a dream in years.”

“Oh, I think I would be crying then too.” She said with a smile.

“Thank you.” I told the nurse.

“You are welcome, honey.” She said and left the room.”

  

  

After breakfast, a new doctor came in and introduced herself. “Hello Sam, My name is Amanda Walker. How are you feeling today?”

“Hello doctor, I’m feeling fine, thank you.”

“I came to talk to you I am one of the Hospital's psychiatrists.”

“Do I have to? I'm not crazy or anything like that.”

“I'm just here to help, you don't need to be crazy to see a psychiatrist. But you do have to see one if you decide to change genders and I'm here to help you cope with your decision.”

“And how do I do that?”

“Why don't you start talking about how are you really feeling right now?”

“Angry, relieved, scared. Angry because of what happened to me, It robbed me of any options I might have had and the choice was practically forced upon me, but I am also relieved because of it. It’s a hard choice and I don't know if I would have ever do it even though I had wondered for a long time that maybe I should have been a girl, and I’m scared because I don't know what will happen from now on; how people will react and mostly I'm scared that I might never be happy. I might not have been good at being a boy, but it was all I knew.”

“We all get a little scared when facing the unknown, its a natural reaction. You said you wondered for a long time that maybe you could tell me more about that.”

“Where do I start?” I thought for a minute. “I think it started when I was little, I never had many friends but as long I can remember I always had Steph, and we were always playing together. She was like my best friend and like a sister to me, we were inseparable. I always loved how she dressed and envied her a little, because I always had to wear the same old boring boy stuff. Of course I never told anyone, not even her. I always thought it was unfair how differently girls were treated by others and how I was supposed to act and I did get beaten more than a few times at school while growing up because of how I acted. I mean, why couldn't I play with the girls? Why the boys games had to be so rough? Was it me? I then started to think that maybe I should have been a girl.”

“And how old you were when you started to think that?”

“I think I was around 8, probably.”

“The way you said earlier, it sounded like you stopped thinking that way, when did that happen?”

“It happened when dad died. I was 12 at the time.”

“And why did you stop thinking you should have been a girl?”

“Because It was my fault he died. If he hadn't come home earlier that day he wouldn't have seen me trying on my mother's clothes and would have not left the house to cool down and wouldn't have been in the accident that killed him. After that I premised that I would become the best boy I could be, a boy he could be proud of.” I said in tears.

“So you are saying that you blame that you wanting to be a girl killed your father and you feel guilty about it?”

“I guess so.”

“Sam, whatever happened it was all his fault, you were only 12 years old and he overreacted. At least he didn't hit you, did he?”

“No, he didn't.”

“Have you thought that maybe he would come to accept you the way you are?”

“I don't know. I can only hope so. I guess I'll never know.”

  

  

We talked for a long time and I cried a lot. After we finished mom came in and gave me a big hug.

“Hi sweety, how are you feeling? How did it go with the shrink” She asked me.

“Did get the license number of the truck that hit me?”

“That good?”

“Yes, my head was thoroughly shrinked."

"Shrinked? Is that a word?"

"I have no idea" I said giggling. "What will happen now mom?”

“I think the doctor will make a final visit and then we can go home.”

“Great, I can't wait to go home.”

  

---

  
To be continued....

  

---

“Good morning Sam. How are you feeling today?” Dr. Campbell asked me soon after entering the room.

“I’m feeling pretty well, doc. I can’t wait to go home though.”

“You’ll be going home very soon, but before I wanted to talk to you for a minute.” He said looking serious.

“Is there something wrong?” I asked him.

“I think I owe you an apology.”

“What for? All you did was help me out.” I said confused.

“Sam, in my haste to help you I wasn’t as careful as I should and because of that you almost died. I should have made more tests and take things slowly.”

“Are you saying things would end up differently? And I mean about the final result having to make the decision I did.”

“I don’t think so. It would probably take a few days, maybe a couple weeks longer.”

“And I would be torturing myself all that time. I like to think you save me from a lot of pain.”

“Thank you Sam. You are an amazing person and I can see why my daughter like you so much.”

I blushed at that comment. ‘Does he know about us? Of course he knows dummy.’

“I also talked to the hospital administration about what happened and they asked me to talk to you and your mother about a settlement to avoid legal action of your part.”

“But we don’t plan on doing that.” Mom said.

“I know, and you know. But the higher ups don’t know about it.” He said with a smirk.

“The hospital offered to waive all its fees from your time here and also offered to cover any future procedure and medical bills referent to your transition.” He told us.

“Didn’t you risk losing your job talking to them?” She asked him.

“I did, but I had to make things right. If I lost my job here to make things right it would be worth it. The higher ups will keep a closer eye on me though after this stunt though.”

“We appreciate what you did, but you didn’t have to.” Mom said.

“Yes I did.” He simply said.

“Thank you Dr. Campbell.” I told him.

“You are welcome, Sam. I also set up an appointment for you with an endocrinologist here at the hospital tomorrow morning at 10:00.”

“Great, I’m just leaving the hospital to get back the very next day.”

“Well, we could keep you overnight if you want.” He said jokingly

“No thank you. I want to go home.” I said.

  

  

When we got home, I left the car and walked carefully inside as I was still somewhat sore down there. ‘Great, NOW I get a macho cowboy walk.’ I thought to myself and giggled.

I sat down on the sofa and turned on the TV. ‘Yuck, daytime soap opera. How people watch these things.’ I thought and zapped around the channels looking for something interesting to watch. I ended up watching the Discovery Channel as nothing else seemed to hold my attention.

At noon mom called me to lunch and after eating I went upstairs to use the computer a little and rest.

I think I ended up falling asleep because when I came to, Jess and Steph were there walking me up.

“Hi.” I said and yawned.

“Hi, beautifull.” Jess said and kissed me gently on the lips.

“Get a room you two.” Steph said and giggled.

I looked around and said. “I think we did.” and that set us all off.

  

  

“How is school?” I asked them.

“Its boring without you there.” Jess said and Steph nodded.

“Yeah, the bullies must be really missing me.”

“No you silly, we missed you, and apparently a few other people did too.”

“Who? It’s not like I have any other friends there.”

“A couple girls from our homeroom asked if you are okay.” Jess said.

“Huh?” I asked confused.

“It seems some of the girls got worried that you didn’t go to school since Monday and they asked us about you.” Steph said.

“That’s good I guess.” I said.

  

  

“Jess, do you know what your father did?” I asked her.

“You mean talk to the hospital administration?” She asked me.

“Yes, I still don’t believe he put his job on the line like that.”

“He was feeling pretty guilty about what happened. He wanted to do something to help you out. He said it wouldn’t be fair for your mother to pay the hospital bills for his mistake.”

“I guess we ended up more than that. The hospital offered to pay for all medical costs related to the transition.” I told them

“That’s great.” Jess and Steph said in stereo.

“Okay, you two are doing that a lot now.”

“Doing what?” They said doing it again.

“Talking like that, you two look like twin sisters doing that.”

“I guess we did hit off pretty well, didn’t we?” Steph asked.

“Yes we did.” Jess agreed.

“What are you doing tomorrow, Sam?” Jess asked me.

“I have an appointment with an endocrinologist at the hospital tomorrow at ten, but nothing after that. I think I’ll stay home as I’m still a bit sore.”

“Can we come around tomorrow then?” Steph said.

“Of course you can. Are you planning something?”

“Hmmm... no?” Steph said trying to look innocent. I look at Jess and she had the same look.

‘Oh, god they planning something. What they up to?’

  

---

  
To be continued....

 

  

---

I woke up feeling refreshed after a good night of sleep. Sleeping in your own bed is definitely better than a hospital one. The soreness seems to be a lot better today too. After my morning routine I went downstairs and mom was already making breakfast.

“Good morning mom”

“Good morning sweety, how are you feeling today?”

“I’m feeling pretty good actually, the soreness isn’t so bad today.”

“That’s good sweety. What do you want to eat today?”

“Hmm.... scrambled eggs? They are looking pretty good today. I could smell them all the way upstairs.”

“Of course sweety.” She said and served me a plate.

“Thank you mom.”

  

  

After breakfast we got ready for my appointment. It seems I overslept a little today and time was getting short. No wonder I had such a good night of sleep, I think I slept over 10 hours. Yeah, yeah, I’m rambling again but who can blame me, right?

We arrived at the hospital a little before 10 and we were directed to the 3rd floor once again. ‘Are all the doctors offices on that floor?’ I asked myself. We went to the reception and sat down, I looked at the magazine rack but I refrained to get one. I came prepared today, I brought my own magazine, thank you. And no I will not say which magazine it is. Let’s just say it’s some reading material that Steph and Jess want me to read and Jess said she would give me a reward If I do it. Those two seems to want me to learn all the girly stuff pretty fast, I dread to think what they planned for later today, and I think mom is on it too, they spent a lot of time talking to mom and giggling yesterday.

The receptionist brought me back from my mental ramblings and directed us to the doctor’s office. When I entered, the doctor greeted us. “Hello Sam, Mrs. Evans, my name is Melanie Walker, but call me Mel.”

“Okay Doctor Mel” I said.

“Just Mel please, the Doctor thing makes me feel old.” She said. Mel is a very attractive woman that looks to be in her late twenties.

  

  

“Sam, I reviewed your file and I see you had a rough time this week.”

“I can’t really say that, I was unconscious most of the rough parts. Of course the aftermath was pretty stressful too, but I’m dealing with it and have some great people supporting me.”

“That’s good, because you will need all the support you can get.” She said. “Okay Sam, first thing we will have a small allergy test, It won’t take long and will just require a few small injections.”

‘Oh God more needles.’ I thought to myself. “Okay.” I said a bit fearfully.

“Don’t worry it wont hurt and we just want to be sure there will be no other incident like last time you came to this hospital.”

  

  

In the end the allergy test was a bit anticlimactic. The amount of injections I had this last week seems to be having an effect on my fear as it wasn’t as bad as it used to. I think it might be a good thing because I will probably see a lot of needles in the near future.

“Sam, everything looks fine and the tests show you didn’t have any reaction to the hormones.”

“That’s a good thing, right?”

“Yes, its a very good thing. I’m going to give you a booster shot and prescribe you some hormone pills too. Also I think you might benefit from a growth hormone with some low dosage shots over the next few months, it might help you grow a few more inches.”

“Really? That will be great. Did you hear that mom?”

“Yes I did, sweety.” She said and gave a hug.

The doctor then gave me the shots and damn my bum is sore. Before leaving the hospital we went to the pharmacy and got our prescription, apparently they are covering the drugs too which I think its good as I have no idea how much would all this cost but I know that probably the treatment isn’t cheap.

  

  

After lunch mom left saying she had some errands to run and I went back to my reading as Jess said there would be a pop quiz about it, and to every right answer I’ll get a reward, at least I think what she said, I was a bit distracted at the moment as she said it whispering into my ears and nibbling it making my entire body tingle.

A few hours later mom came back with a bunch of groceries and started to make dinner. I offered to help but she told me to stay in the living room and wait for the girls. ‘What are they planning? Mom is definitely on it too.’

A few minutes later the doorbell rang, I went to open the door and it was Jess and Steph carrying a few gym bags that seemed pretty full, with then there was someone else that I recognized being Liz from our class.

“Hi, why all the bags?” asked them.

“Aren’t you let us in? These things are heavy.” Steph said.

“Oh, okay.” I said and let them in.

After they entered and put the bags inside, Steph said. “Sam, you know Liz, right? She is one of my best friends.”

“Hi Liz.” I said shyly.

“Hi Sam, Steph told me a lot about you.” She said and gave me a hug.

“Really? What did she tell you about me?”

“Well... I think its better she tell you that.” Liz cryptically said.

“Steph?” I said looking at her.

“We better sit down, it will take a while.

We sat down, Jess and I cuddled together on the love seat, Jess and Liz sat on the sofa and Steph started to talk.

  

  

(Steph)

Jess and I were sitting together at lunch when Liz approached up and asked if she could sit down with us, and of course we said she could. After she sat down she turned at me and said.

“You are looking much happier these last two days Steph, something good happened?”

“Yes, I got my best friend back.” I said happily.

“You mean Sam?”

“Yes, we finally made up.”

“Is everything okay? last time I saw Sam was Monday.”

“Yes, everything is okay now, Tuesday Sam had a severe allergic reaction in the hospital and had to stay there until yesterday.”

“Oh god, but everything is okay now, right?”

“Fortunately yes, she had a rough time these last few days.” I said noticing the pronoun slip a bit too late.

“She? I knew she was a girl, I thought she looked too cute in that cheerleader uniform to be a guy. Some people said she is a guy, but no guy look like that. Half the girls in our class think like that too, the other half doesn’t know what to think of Sam. She talks and act like a girl, but is always wearing boy clothes. I personally think she would look very pretty if she dressed up a little more.”

(Sam) “What?”

(Jess) “Shush, let her finish the story.”

“Liz, we have been friends for a while now, and what I am going to tell you is something I, Sam and Jess would like to keep quiet for now, okay?”

“A secret? I can keep secrets and you know it.”

Jess looked at me and said. “Ohhh, I wonder what kind of dirty she has on you Steph.”

“No dirty, quite the opposite, but that’s all I’m saying.” Liz said.

“Okay, meet us after school and we will talk while walking home, okay?” I said.

“This is better be good. Who am I kidding, knowing you it will be big.” Liz said.

  

  

After we school we met up and started to walk home, Liz lives pretty close to us.

“Now spill it, girl. I hardly been able to pay attention to class after lunch.” Liz said.

“Like you ever pay attention.” I said poking my tongue at her.

“Come on, don’t make me beg.”

“Okay, okay, don’t do the puppy dog eye thing on me, that only work with the boys.”

“Dammit.” She said and pouted.

We then told her everything that happened since Tuesday.

“So you are saying that Sam doesn’t have a choice but become a girl?”

“Pretty much.” I said.

“It must be very hard.”

“I think so, but I know Sam and I know she will do well.”

“So that’s why you are using female pronouns?”

“We need to get used to it and so does Sam, and I kinda always saw her like a sister to me, long before all this happened.”

“And you want to keep this under wraps?”

“I think it would be best, as you said, many already think Sam is a girl and the rest is uncertain, other than a few assholes. Can you keep it a secret?”

“Of course I can, but I think it would be good if we could bring a couple more girls up to date, and I think I know exactly who we can trust.”

“We are going to Sam’s later, would you like to join us?” Jess asked.

  

  

(Sam)

“And here we are.” Jess finished her tale.

I looked at Liz and asked her. “Are you okay with all this?”

“Of course I am, I kinda saw you as a girl for a while too, so it’s not a big change.”

I went to her with watery eyes and gave her a hug. “Thank you, Liz.”

“You are welcome, Sam.”

I looked at the bags again, looked at the 3 girls in my living room and said. “What is the bags for? What are you guys plotting?”

Jess get up got closer to me and said. “Well, we need to bring you up to date on being a girl so we planned something special for tonight.”

“What is it?”

“Something every girl goes through while growing up and you missed a lot of it, and its really fun.” Steph said.

“What is it? Can someone tell me?”

The three girls looked at each other and then said in unison “Slumber party!”

  

---

  
To be continued....

  

---

“What?”

“Slumber party, silly.” Steph said. “You need to learn a few things about being a girl and this is the beginning of your education. You have no idea how many times I wished I could have invited you to one of my parties.”

“But... but..”

“Come on Sam, it will be fun.” Jess told me.

“Okay. I guess there is no escaping, is there?”

“Smart girl.” Liz said.

“So, what is in the bags?”

“Just some things the three of us found in our closets that we grew out of, maybe we can find you some things for you to wear.”

“Why do I feel like I just became your personal Barbie doll?” I said and the three girls giggled.

At that moment mom comes into the room and greets the girls. “Hi girls, Is everything ready for tonight?” She ask them.

“Yes, Mrs. Evans.” Jess said.

“Call me Carla, girls. Mrs. Evans makes me feel so old.”

“Mom, you knew they were planning this, didn’t you?”

“Yes sweetie, and I think it will be fun.”

Then I just shook my head and sighed. ‘Resistance is futile’ comes into my mind and I giggled at the geekyness of the thought.

“Why are you giggling?” Jess asked me.

“Nothing, I just had a silly thought.”

“Come on, tell us.” Steph said.

“Resistance is futile.” I simply said. Jess and Liz looked confused and Steph just giggled.

“You are such a geek, only you to quote Star Trek in this situation” Steph said.

  

  

“So, what are we doing first? I have no idea what goes on in a slumber party.” I told them.

“First thing you’ll have a bath and save your legs and armpits, you don’t have much hair, but even a little is a no no.” Jess said. “After that, go into the shower and wash and rinse your hair.”

“I’m going to fill the tub and add some bath salts.” Mom said.

“After that we will have a little fashion show, and you Sam is the model.” Steph said with an evil gleam in her eyes. I look at Jess and Liz and notice they too have the same look in her eyes. ‘Yes, they are Borgs alright, and they plan to assimilate me, and mom is one of them.’ I thought to myself. Yes, I do like Star Trek.

  

  

I went upstairs and entered the bathroom, the tub was filled and it had bubbles in it. I can’t remember last time I had a bubble bath. I got into the tub and the water was warm and smelled like flowers, I lay down on the tub and start to bathe myself, after that I feel the bath feels so good that I decide to relax a bit. I guess I dozed off because I heard my mom calling me and the water was getting cold.

“Sweetie, are you okay in there?”

“Yes, mom. I think I dozed off for a bit, the bath was so relaxing.”

“Okay sweetie, don’t take too long.”

After that I shaved my legs and armpits. I was feeling pretty proud that I managed to not hurt myself. I got into the shower and washed my hair and rinsed like I was told to. Getting out I dried myself and the shaved legs felt so smooth and kind of nice too. After I dried myself I saw a pair of panties and a bath robe waiting for me. I looked at the panties and wondered which side was front and which was back. I decided to try it on both ways and I thought the way it felt better was the right one, I hoped.

I put on the panties and they felt pretty god at the first try, took them off and tried the other way and it felt just wrong, so I took out again and put back on like the first time. It fit pretty well and quite snugly, even my small boy bit seemed to disappear when I wore it. .‘It’s a good thing I guess.’. I looked in the mirror and I was starting to look like a girl, a flat chested one, but a girl none the less. I think I was mesmerized by the image because the next thing I remember was mom knocking on the door again.

“I think I’m done, mom.” I said putting the robe on. I opened the door and they were already waiting for me in my room.

“Hi.” I said shyly and blushing.

“Come on in, Sam. We won’t bite.” Jess said. “At least they won’t.”

I slowly entered my room and I saw a bunch of clothes spread all over my bed. I was having mixed feeling about it, I wanted to try them on but was scared too, reluctant even and I guess the girls noticed.

“Sam, they are just clothes. You don’t have to be afraid. I know this is all new for you and if you don’t want to do it tonight we won’t force you.” Mom said and the girls nodded.

“Thanks mom, but I think I’ll try them on. I know you all put a lot of thought in this.

“Are you sure?” She asked me.

“Yes mom, I’m sure. Thanks for asking though.” I said and hugged her. “So are you Borgs ready to assimilate me?” I asked with a smile and they laughed.

  

  

“Okay Sam, do you have the panties I left for you in the bathroom on?” Mom asked me.

I blushed and said. “Yes mom.”

“Good, then you can take off the robe as you’ll have a bit of modesty, but if you are uncomfortable I can ask the girls to wait outside for a bit until you have a bit more cloth on.”

“It’s okay mom, as long they don’t laugh at me.” I said and the girls all promised they wouldn’t.

I took out the robe and heard some gasps.

“Mom, Is there something is wrong?”

“Sweetie, have you been taking a good look at yourself in the mirror lately?” She asked me.

“Why? Is there something wrong?” I asked looking at myself.

“It’s not that sweetie, but I think you were starting to show some signs of feminization. Your waist is starting to look like a girls one.” mom said.

“You think so? I didn’t notice.”

“Yes it does, Sam.” Steph said and the other two nodded. “Your waist didn’t look like that last year.”

“I guess it doesn’t really matter now. It might make things a bit easier instead.” I told them. “And I think more changes will happen in the next few months.”

“Are you sure you are not a girl?” Liz asked me. “Because from where I’m standing, I see a pretty if not a bit underdeveloped girl. I can’t even see sign of your... well.. you know.”

“I’m not a complete girl yet, if that's what you mean, Liz. And I hope that was a compliment.”

“Yes it was. You are too pretty to be a boy.”

“Thanks Liz.” I said. “Okay girls, your Barbie doll is ready, what are we going to try first?”

  

  

The next hour or so passed pretty fast. The first thing they did was to get me into a bra and put some padding gel into it to give me a more girlish figure. I was a bit reluctant at first but by the time I tried the 5th (or was that the 6th) outfit I started to get into it and had a good time. I tried every type of clothes, dresses, skirts, tops, jeans, etc. I felt like a Barbie doll and strangely enough I enjoyed it. I ended up wearing a black skort, something I didn’t even know existed, I think it’s a mix of skirt and shorts and pink top with a Hello Kitty picture on it in the end. I think they wanted me to look like a 13 year old girl with that combination, but I think it looked cute so I didn’t mind much.

We went downstairs and mom ordered some pizza for us. After dinner they started to teach me how to do my nails, Jess did mine first and had me try to do hers after. It was not as easy as I thought it would be but in the end I think I did a good job with her hands and feet. We both had our nails painted a very subtle shade of pink that looked pretty cute with my Hello Kitty top. Come on, I am entitled to some cuteness. I missed a lot of growing up as a girl, so no judging, okay?

After nails it was makeup time, they started to explain about foundation, blushes, mascara, eyeliner and many other stuff that I can’t even remember the name. We spent a lot of time doing each other’s makeup and it was quite fun even mom was having fun. After makeup they started to mess with my hair, trying to give it more shape. My hair isn’t long, but it’s not short either, its big enough to tie in a small pony tail behind my head. When they finished with it they made me look into a mirror and what I saw surprised me. Looking back at me was a pretty girl, she looked younger than I am, but she was very pretty. I kept looking at the reflection for a long time before collapsing and started to cry.

Mom came to me and holds me tightly. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?” She asked me worriedly.

“Nothing (sob) mommy. It’s just...” I couldn’t find the words

Jess also came to me and started to hold me tightly too. “It’s okay Sam. I’m sorry we made you do this, we never meant to hurt you.” She said with tears in her eyes.

“It’s not that (sob) Jess. I’m not hurt. (sob). It’s just that I didn’t expect what I saw.”

“What is that?”

“The real me.”

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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I think I cried myself to sleep, because the next thing I remember was waking up on the sofa with my head on Jess’ lap and she was gently caressing my hair.

“Hi sleepyhead.” She said.

“Hi. How long was I asleep?”

“Just a couple hours.”

“I’m sorry.”

“What for?”

“For ruining the party.”

“You didn’t ruin it, Sam and the party is not over yet, but I think we should fix your makeup, you look a mess.”

She went with me to the bathroom to help me with my makeup. I looked at myself in the mirror and I looked a total mess. My makeup was completely ruined. I think I looked like a clown raccoon. Jess used some cold cream to remove the makeup and 10 minutes later we came out of the bathroom with my makeup fixed.

Arriving at the living room the other girls were there waiting for us. When we entered the room they all stood up, came to me and downed me in hugs.

“Thanks, guys.” I said feeling the tears trying to leak again.

“No crying, you just had your makeup fixed.” Steph told me.

“Then don’t do things to make me teary. That or I’ll have to forget makeup for the rest of the night.”

The rest of the night was pretty fun, we watched a couple movies, talked about a myriad of subjects. I never thought girls were so open about so many things, so different from the guys that seem afraid to share things with each other.

When we were finally ready to change into our sleepwear, mom came up to me and gave me a pink silky nightgown. It was a good thing I had already removed my makeup because it was beautiful and I felt the tears building up again. When I put the nightgown on, it felt so silky and nice. We put a few sleeping bags in the living room and started to talk again for a long time.
Just before we went to sleep, I turned to the girls and said. “Thank you everyone for an amazing night. I had a great time tonight and learned a lot too, and it’s all thanks to you.”

“You are welcome Sam.” We also had a great time Steph said.

“And you were a great Barbie doll.” Liz said and we giggled.

“We better enjoy it while we can Liz. Something tells me that soon she will giving us fashion lessons.” Jess said and kissed me on the cheek.

“I think I’m going to sleep now, I can’t stay awake a minute longer.” I told them and soon I was in the land of nod.

  

  

*I was walking around a park, the same park I used to come with my father when I was little. I went to the playground and sat down on the swing. It was a nice warm day, the skies were blue and there wasn’t a single cloud around. I was lost in thought when I heard a familiar voice that I never thought I would hear again.

“Hello princess.” The voice said.

I turned around and there he was. “DADDY!!” I yelled, run to him and gave him a big hug.

“How are you, princess?”

“I’m sorry Daddy. I’m so sorry.” I said crying.

“There is nothing to be sorry, princess. It was my all my fault. Instead of trying to understand what you were going through I had to lose my temper and storm out.”

“I tried to be a good boy for you daddy, I really tried.”

“I know you did, but you shouldn’t have to. It only made you suffer and I’m sorry for it. It was my own fault I got killed, you need to let go of the guilt, princess. You look so pretty, so much like your mother.”

“Oh daddy, I missed you so much.” I said holding him tight

“I missed you too princess, and I miss your mother so much.”

“But… how? I mean how are you here?”

“I needed to talk to you, princess. I needed to tell you that I’m proud of you, you are a very brave girl.”

“But you hated when you caught me dressed up. I could see the anger and disappointment in your eyes.”

“I was a fool sweetie. I never thought of myself as being a bigot, but when I saw you dressed I had to get out, I was so mad that I had to get away or I would end up doing something I knew I would regret. While I was driving I started to cool down and think about things. In the end I was mad at me for the way I acted and I had hurt your feelings. I was on my way home to apologize when the accident happened.”

“I’m so sorry daddy. I wish you were still with us.”

“Don’t be sorry, princess, I know you feel guilty for what happened but you need to let it go. I wish I could be with you and your mom too, but it was not meant to be. I need you to let go the guilty, princess.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s the only way I’ll be able to move on. Don’t worry, I’ll always watch over you and your mother. I love you both very much.” He said and kissed my forehead.

“Does it mean I’ll never see you again?” I said in tears.

“Not like this, but I’ll always be in your heart and will always watch over you.”

“I don’t want you to go daddy.”

“I am already gone, princess. It doesn’t matter how much I would love to stay with you I can’t, it’s time for me to move on. It’s time for you to move on too. Please, do this for me. I want you to be happy, and tell your mom that I’ll always love her.”

“I will daddy. I love you so much.” I said hugging him with all my strength.

“Good bye Samantha, my beautiful daughter.”

“Good bye daddy. I love you.”*

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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I woke up the next morning with tears in my eyes. ‘It was such a nice dream.’I thought to myself before noticing that someone is behind me spooning on me, I turn my head and see Jess sleeping next to me. I stayed there enjoying the warmth of her body next to mine and hearing her breathing until my bladder threatened to explode. I got up as slowly as I could to not to wake her up and went to the bathroom.

Coming back to the living room, she was yawning and stretching. ‘She looks so cute waking up.’ She looks at me and a big smile appears on her face.

“Good morning.” She whispered to me not wanting to wake up the other two girls.

“Good morning, beautiful.” I whisper back to her and give her a light kiss on her lips.

We walked together into the kitchen where mom was already having a cup of coffee. “Good morning, mom” I said giving her a kiss on her cheek.

“Good morning, sweetie. Good morning Jess.”

“Good morning Aunt Carla.”

“Aunt Carla, I like that.” She said with a smile. “Did you girls have a good sleep?”

“I slept wonderfully.” Jess said.

“I slept well too.” I said. “I had a very nice dream.”

“What was it about?” Mom asked.

“I dreamed of Daddy.” I said and my mom looked a bit shocked.

“You too?” She asked.

“You dreamed about daddy too?”

“Yes I did, and it was a very nice dream. Why don’t you tell me about your dream first and I’ll tell you mine afterwards?”

I told mom about my dream and what daddy said in it. ‘When did I start to call him daddy?’ I thought to myself. When I finished telling her my dream we were both crying and hugging each other and Jess had tears in her eyes too.

“It was a nice dream, wasn’t it?”

“It was great sweetie, and I think that was really your father.” Mom said.

“How?” I asked her a little shocked.

“Let me tell you my dream and you’ll see.”

  

  

(Carla)

I was in my bathroom having a nice warm bubble bath when I suddenly heard his voice. “Hello my love.”

I turned to him and screamed while jumping out of the tub “STEVE!!!”

I ran to him and started to kiss him. “I missed you, you… you jerk.” I said hitting him on the chest over and over. “I missed you so much. How did you dare to leave us like that?” I said in tears.

“I’m so sorry, honey. I wish I could have been there for you and Sam.”

“I wish you were here with us too.” I said giving another lingering kiss. “Oh my. Look what have I done. You are all wet now. Come with me into the tub like old times, we can talk while we bathe.”

“I thought you would never ask.” He said and started to undress.

We both got into the tub and snuggled together. I could feel Little Stevie perking up and I said. “Hmmm, it seems someone else missed me too.”

(Sam) “Mooom, too much info.” I said shocked and mom blushed a little.

(Jess) Shush, it’s just getting interesting and we are all girls here, we talk about those things.

(Carla) “Sorry sweetie, but don’t worry it won’t go further than that.”

(Sam) “Okay mom.”
(Carla) “So where was I? Oh yes.”

We both got into the tub and snuggled together. I could feel Little Stevie perking up and I said. “Hmmm, it seems someone else missed me too.”

“I wish I could make love to you honey, but my time is short.”

“I wish we could make love too, I missed you so much.”

“Honey, I’m sorry I couldn’t be here for you and Sam, I was an ass that day and I needed to get out. When I saw Sam dressed up I got so mad that I almost hit our child. I had to leave or I would do something I would regret for the rest of my life. While I was driving I saw that I overreacted and felt so bad about the way I treated Sam. I was going back to apologize to her when I got killed in that accident.”

“Did you just say her?”

“Yes, my love. I did, and I’m very proud of her. She looks so much like you when you were her age.”

“You know she blames herself for what happened, don’t you?”

“Yes I do, and I feel sad she feels that way. I also know she tried to be a boy so I could be proud of her. I am proud of her because she is being true to herself now. I have always been looking over you and Sam, and always will, but it’s time for you to move on my love.”

“What do you mean?”

“Honey, it’s time for you and Sam to move on. I want to see you both happy. I don’t want you to be alone for the rest of your life. You are still young and need someone to love, someone that can be there for you and love you back. Please honey, do it for me. I can’t move on myself unless I know the two of you are going to be okay. I will always love you and you will always be my soul mate.”
“I love you too, Steve.”
“Good bye my love and take care of our daughter.”
“Good bye, my love.” I said giving him one last passionate kiss.

  

  

(Sam)

When mom finished telling her dream we were all crying again, it was a good cry. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

“Mom, that was really daddy, wasn’t he?”

“I think so sweetie.”

“I miss him so much.” I told her.

“I miss him too.” She said hugging me.

We were still crying when Steph came yawning through the door.

“Is everything alright?” She asked us.

“Everything is just fine, Steph. We just miss my dad and wished he was here.”

She walked towards me and gave me a very tight hug. “I’m sure he would have been proud of you, Sam.”

“I’m sure he would.” I told her hugging her back. “Now I think it’s time we start making breakfast.”

  

  

Liz woke up while we were preparing breakfast and joined us in the kitchen. “Good morning.” She said sweepingly.

“Good morning.” We said back

“How long have you been up?”

“A little while, you were sleeping so peacefully that we didn’t want to wake you up.”

“Oh Sam, I think you were the first one to fall asleep yesterday, but considering how you were last night we decided to postpone the penalty for today.” Liz told me.

“Penalty?”

“Yes, the first one to fall asleep pays a penalty, but we won’t tell you what kind of penalty it usually is, but next time all bets are off. I won’t protect you next time.” Jess said.

“So what do I have to do today to pay for it?”

“Nothing much, just play Barbie doll again… at the mall.” Liz said.

“Huh?”

“Shopping.” Steph told me.

“What for?” I asked confused.

“You need to start your wardrobe. The things we brought were just to give you a head start so we could take you shopping today. It will be so fun.” Jess said.

“You planned this all along, didn’t you?” I asked Jess giving her a questioning look.

“We all did.” Mom said.

“You too?”

“You think I would miss going with my daughter to her first shopping spree? We have so much to do today. Now let’s eat and get ready for some fun.”
  

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To be continued....

 

  

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We all had a nice breakfast together and soon we were all getting ready for the mall.

“Steph, I have no idea what to wear.”

“Let’s find something practical you’ll need to try out a lot of clothes today and it will be better if you wear something that it’s easy to put on and take off easily.”

Looking around my wardrobe where some of the outfits of previous night were hanging I asked. “What do you suggest?”

“What about a skirt and top? Maybe even a sundress, as it is still quite warm.”

“As long I don’t look like a 13 year old again I think I’m fine with either. Maybe wear something to wear with trainers as I don’t have any shoes yet.”

“What is taking you two so long?” Jess said entering the room.

“Sam here is having trouble choosing an outfit for today. She says she needs something that goes with trainers because she doesn’t have any shoes.”

“Darn, I knew we were forgetting something yesterday.” Jess said slapping her forehead.

“What about Jeans and a top?” Steph asked.

“That will work, but I wanted to see her in a skirt or a dress.” Jess said.

“Tough luck, you’ll have to wait until we are in the mall trying clothes.” I said and poke my tongue at her.

“You are really getting into being a girl aren’t you?” Liz asked me from the door.

“Come on in Liz.” I told her. “It’s not that I’m getting into it, I think I just stopped trying to be something I’m not. I think the dream I had last night helped too. I’m sure I’ll be reluctant at times, but it’s probably because I’m not used to all this.”

“Well, you are doing a great job Sam, and you’ll have to tell me your dream sometime.” Liz said with a smile.

“Thank you Liz, I will. Now let’s get ready so you girls can have your evil ways with me at the mall.”

  

  
We were in the car heading to the mall when mom said. “First there is a place we should stop before going to the mall.”

“And where is that, mom?”

“You’ll see.” It was all she said.

A few minutes later we were parking, we left the car and mom led us into a prosthetics store. “Mom, what are we doing here?”

“You’ll find out soon, sweetie.”

I looked at the girls and they seemed a bit confused too.

A middle age woman greeted us. “Good morning ladies, what can I do for you today?”

“Hi, my name Is Carla Evans and I talked to you yesterday on the phone.”

“Oh, yes. We have what you asked right here. Would the young lady like to come with me?” She asked looking at me.

“Me?” I asked pointing at myself.

“Yes you, I need you to come with me so we can fit them properly.”

“Okay.” I said wondering what mom is up to. Sometimes I think she likes to see me sweat a bit.

I followed the lady into the back room and mom followed us. “Could you please take off your top and bra and lie on the table for me?” She asked me.

I looked at mom and she gave me a nod. “Okay” I said again.

I took off my top and bra and lay down on the table. The woman came back with a box on her hands. She opened it and took something that looked like two small breasts from it. ‘Boobs? I’m going to get boobs?’

“These are just a full A cup as your mother requested, she said you are probably going to start developing soon and don’t want them to look too big. Also they will look and feel a lot better than the padding you were using.”

“Okay.” I said yet again. ’What is wrong with me? It seems the only thing that gets out of my mouth is okay.’

She then positioned them over my chest and marked the spots. She applied something cold on my chest and the breasts, put them on me again and asked me to hold them in place for a few minutes.

A few minutes later she said I could stop holding them and I could get up. I got up and I felt the little weight they added to my chest. “Are they glued?” I asked.

“Yes, I used a special glue to hold them in place. They come with the solvent to take them off too. But you can keep them on for about 4 weeks before needing to take them off and clean them and your chest.”

“How are you feeling, sweetie?” Mom asked me.

“Different I guess.”

“I hope you don’t mind this little surprise. I know you’ll be growing your own soon, but I thought you might like a little head start.”

“I loved it mom.” I said hugging her.

“Just one more thing, let me apply this semi-permanent makeup to hide the seams.” She said and gestured me over to her. She then worked her magic and soon I couldn’t see where my skin ended and the fake breasts started.

“This looks good.” I told her.

“Yes it does, and the size fits your perfectly.”

“You better put back your bra and top back on because the girls are waiting for you.”

“Okay mom.” I said and began to dress myself.

Going back to the front of the store the girls were there waiting for me. “So what happened back there? You were long for a long time.” Jess asked.

“Mom just gave me a little gift.”

“What is it?” They all asked together.

“Don’t you girls see anything different in me?” I asked them.

“She is a girl alright.” Liz said and giggled.

They all looked at me up and down when mom got out of the back room holding the padding on her hands. The girls looked at mom and at me and they said together again. “You got breasts.”

  

  
Mom paid the woman and soon we were on our way to the mall. Arriving there we quickly found a parking spot. Getting inside I was starting to get nervous. ‘What if someone recognizes me? Will they know what I am?’

Sensing my discomfort Jess and Steph grabbed my hands reassuringly and led me inside. “Thank you.” I whispered to them.

I was still nervous and I needed to go to the bathroom badly. “Steph, I have a problem.” I whispered to her.

“What is it?” She asked me.

“I… well… I need to go to the bathroom.” I whispered

“That’s all? I think we all could use it right now.” She said.

“Use what?” Jess and Liz asked.

“The bathroom, Sam needs to go.”

“Steph!” I said blushing.

“Don’t worry, Sam. Haven’t you notice girls always go together?” Mom told me.

“Well… yes.”

“So let’s go.” Jess said holding my hand and leading me to the ladies room.

Reaching the door for the ladies room I stopped dead cold. “What’s wrong?” Jess asked me.

“I don’t know if I can go in there.” I told her.

“Of course you can, you are a girl.” Jess said and led me inside and the others followed us in.

I got inside and quickly went into an empty stall. I sat down to pee of course. After I finished I used a piece of toilet paper to clean myself and flushed. I got out and washed my hands. I was almost leaving when Mom called me back in. “You need to touch up your makeup, sweetie.” She said.

I went back to the mirror and I touched up my lipstick. It still feels a little strange to wear makeup.

  

  
We got out of the bathroom together and they said we should get some lingerie first. We went to one of the lingerie stores in the shopping and of course I was a little reluctant to get inside at first, but the girls dragged me inside quite easily. I looked around and I felt like I was drowning in a sea of femininity. There were girl’s undergarments everywhere from simple to extremely sexy. The girls seemed to have a good time looking around and I tried to join them so I wouldn’t attract attention. Mom picked up 3 packs of 6 colored panties each. Luckily all we had to choose were some bras for me to use. I didn’t want sexy bra, just plain ones for now until I get more confortable. After trying out a few we found some plain bras in several colors, and again we got a few colors. ’I never knew girls wore so many different colors of bra and panties.

After the lingerie store we went to several clothes store and they made me try half the stores each time we entered one, I ended up owning several new outfits, enough to not use the same thing for two weeks and the girls said that they would teach me to mix and match so it appears that I’m always using a different outfit.

After we left the bags we had with us in the car, we went back in and decided to have some lunch. Arriving at the food court we got our lunch and found an empty table for us. We were eating and talking when a couple girls from our school came up to us and greeted us. It was Mandy and Karen two of the cheerleaders. “Hi guys, nice to meet you here.” Karen said.

“Hi Karen, we came here today to buy some new clothes for Sam.” Liz said.

They looked at us and stopped at me with her mouths open. “Sam? Is that you?” Mandy asked.

“Hi Mandy. Hi Karen.” I said shyly.

“Wow you look great. So you decided to give up the tomboy look?” Karen said and Mandy just stood there looking me funny.

“Kind of.” I said.

“We thought it was about time she started to dress a little better.” Steph said.

“She? So Sam is really a girl?” Mandy asked us.

“Do you think I look like a guy?” I asked her.

“Well… no, but some of the guys keep saying you are a boy.” She said.

“That shows how blind they can be.” Jess said.

“Well, they are wrong but not completely wrong.” I said.

“What do you mean?” Mandy asked me.

“You noticed that I wasn’t in school most of the week right?”

“Yes I did. What does it have to do with it?”

“Well, I was at the hospital. It seems I was born with a defect that made the doctors think I was a boy. That’s what they found out there.” I said. ’It’s not exactly a lie, is it’? I mean I was born with a defect and the way to fix it is me becoming a girl anyway.’

“Is it true?” Karen asked.

“Yes, my dad is one of the doctors treating her.” Jess said.

“So you thought you were a boy?” (Karen)

“Not exactly, I kind of always knew I was a girl. That’s why I was always depressed I think.”

“It must have been tough.” Karen said looking thoughtfully

“Yes it was.” I said.

“Well, I for one I’m glad you are one of the girls.” Steph said.

“Me too.” Said Jess.

“Me three.” That was Liz.

“So what are the plans for after lunch?” Mandy asked.

“We were thinking of raiding some shoe stores. Sam needs to get quite a few pairs.” Mom said.

“Can we join you? It sounds fun.” Karen asked.

“Of course, the more the merrier. We need to beat the tomboy out of Sam, and that’s what we are doing today at the mall. We are girls on a mission.” Steph said.

“And Sam makes a very cute Barbie doll.” Liz added and I blushed.

“I wish I came by earlier. I would love to see that.” Karen said.

“So would I.” Added Mandy.

“I’ll tell you what, help us to choose some new shoes to Sam and we can get her to model what we bought today later.” Jess said.

“It’s a deal.” Both girls said quickly.

“And let’s not forget we need to get her ears pierced too.” Steph said.

“Oh yes. I was forgetting that.” Mom said.

’Dammit, more needles?’

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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After lunch I and my increased entourage of female teenagers went to a shoe store to pick me a few pairs of what they called essential shoes. Once inside each girl went to a different direction like they were on a mission, and I guess they are.

After a few minutes Jess came to me and asked. “Sam, do you know your shoe size?”

“Actually I don’t. Maybe we should check my trainers to find out.” I told her.

“Okay, but I think we will need to convert it to girls size.”

I took my trainers and gave it to Jess for her to check it.”

“Hmmm… Sam?”

“Yes?”

“I just noticed something about your trainers.”

“What is that?”

“They are girl ones.”

“What? MOM!”

Mom came to me and said. “Hey sweetie, is there something wrong?”

“Mom, Jess just told me that my trainers are girl trainers, is it true?”

“Yes they are. There are no male shoes your size. It was either that or get children sized trainers.”

“Which is my shoe size?”

“5 in women size, but I did get you some that looked pretty much unisex.”

“Wow Sam, your feet are small.” Liz said.

“Oh well. I guess I can keep my trainers then.” I told them

“Yes you can, but we need to get you at least one pair of trainers that are a bit more feminine.” Jess said.

After what seemed an eternity and trying several pairs of different styles of shoes I ended up with a pair of trainers, a pair of 2 inch black shoes, a pair of sandals, a pair of Mary Jane's and a couple others that I can’t remember the name yet, totaling six pairs of shoes. The girls told me that soon we would need to get more shoes as there is no such thing as too many shoes in the girls vocabulary, but six pairs was a good start.

After we left the shoe store was time to have my ears pierced. We went into a store and looked around the earrings available. The salesgirl came to us and said. “Good afternoon ladies. Is there anything we can do for you?”

“Yes, we came here today to have my daughter’s ears pierced.” Mom said pushing me to the front of the group. ‘Grrrr, thanks a lot mom.’

“We have several pairs of starter studs and the piercing is free.” She said showing us some earrings.

The girl’s suggestions were a bit over the top on the feminine size, hearts, butterflies and such. In the end I chose mom suggestion. It was a simple stud with a small deep red stone that the sales lady said it was garnet and according to mom it is my birthstone.

The salesgirl said she would use a piercing needle because it was better than use a piercing gun and less traumatic for the earlobes. ‘Dammit I knew there was going to be more needles’

She then cleaned up my earlobes and before I knew it I was the proud owner of pierced ears. ‘That was it? I didn’t feel a thing.’

I looked at myself in the mirror and the earrings looked pretty good on me. The girl then explained how to care of my brand new holes while they healed.

After paying we left the store and mom asked me. “It was not so bad, was it?”

“No mom, it wasn’t. Actually I didn’t feel a thing.”

“Then maybe we should go back and ask for another hole?” Steph asked.

“Noooooo!” I said and they all laughed.

  

  
It was time for us to go home and to another part of what the girls called my “education”, meaning model everything we bought today. Luckily Karen drove to the mall so we didn’t have to try and fit 7 people inside mom’s car.

Arriving at home, everyone grabbed a couple bags from the trunk and brought upstairs to my room. Entering the room Karen said. “I think we need to do some remodeling here, this place is just too plain.” And the other girls (including my mom) agreed. ‘Oh, oh! I bet they are already remodeling my room in their heads’

We started to take the outfits out of their bags and it was apparently the time to start the modeling. It took me almost 2 hours to model all the outfits we bought today, including several changes of shoes. It was very tiring but really fun and educational. They even made me model several variations mixing and matching several times.

My mom asked the girls if they would like to dine with us and they called their parents before accepting. My mom then asked what we would like to eat and we said we would like to have pizza tonight again.

“So what are the plans for tomorrow?” Jess asked us while we waited for the pizzas to arrive.

“I don’t have anything planned. I was thinking maybe stay at home and relax a little. Today it was a very tiring day.”

“Actually tomorrow morning Sam has an appointment at the beauty salon for a little makeover.” Mom told us.

“Ohhhh, can I go too?” Steph asked.

“I want to go too.” Jess added.

“I think we all want to see Sam new look tomorrow.” Liz said and the girls all nodded.

“The appointment is at 10:00, so why don’t Jess and Steph meet us here at 9:00 to go with us and the rest of you girls meet us there at noon and we can all have lunch together?” Mom asked them.

“Okay.” They chorused.

  

  
The pizza arrived and I think we talked more than ate. I even was able to be part of the conversation, after all half the time they were talking about me. After a while I started to get misty eyes and Liz was the first one to notice.

“What’s wrong Sam?”

“Oh, nothing, It’s just that for the first time in my life I feel like I am part of a group, that I belong with you guys. Corny I know.”

“It’s not corny at all, Sam.” Steph said and Jess hugged me tightly.

“And you do belong with us.” Jess said and all the girls agreed.

Mandy came to me and said. “You know, when you first told us you were a girl I was a bit skeptical but after all we went through today I can’t see how anyone could ever think you were a boy. You are a bit green yet, but everything about you screams girl. I feel that you suffered a lot and I would be honored if you could consider me a friend.” And she hugged me.

“Thank you. I’d like that very much, Mandy.” I told her hugging her back.

Too soon it was time for everyone to go home and after everyone left I went to have a nice bath to relax. After the bath I dried myself, put on a new pair of panties and a new nightgown. I was so tired that I think I fell asleep even before my head hit the pillow.

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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“Wake up, sweetie.” Mom said.

“Five more minutes.” I grunted.

“You said that the last time.” She told me.

“You didn’t call me five minutes ago.” I said yawning.

“No, I called you ten minutes ago.”

“I don’t remember it, so it didn’t happen.” I said and turned to try to sleep again.

“Your friends will be here soon, its past 8:00.” She said and opened the curtains of my bedroom window.

“EEEK, too bright.” I squealed and tried to hide my head under the covers just as mom took them out of bed.

“Okay, okay, I’m up.” I said dejectedly and made a beeline to the bathroom.

Waking up with breasts, even small as mine were it is something new and a bit strange to feel their weight hanging down from my chest. ’I guess I’ll get used to them soon.’ I looked at myself in the mirror and my hair was a mess, but with my new assets I didn’t look like a 12 — 13 year old girl, I guess I look more like a 14 or 15 years old. After I took care of my morning routine, I went downstairs and mom was waiting for me with breakfast ready.

“Did you have a good sleep, sweetie?” She asked me.

“I was having a great one until someone decided I had to get up.” I said shooting daggers at her with my eyes.

“I see that didn’t change. You still get mad when I wake you up in the morning.”

“Why wouldn’t I be? I was having such a nice dream and you woke me up in the middle of it.”

“Really? What was it about?”

“Well… It was… I… I… can’t remember” I said blushing.

“Hmmm, let me guess. You were dreaming about Jess?”

“M... maybe?” I was turning a deeper shade of red.

“You don’t need to be ashamed, sweetie. It’s a natural thing to dream about the one you are in love.”

“Don’t you think it’s a bit strange?”

“What?”

“That I have known Jess for less than a week and already fallen in love with her?”

“Not really, I fell in love with your father the day I met him.”

“I didn’t know that. How did you two met?”

“We were in our high school senior year but we didn’t have any classes together. One day I was late for an English class and was running on the hall, when he appeared from nowhere and I bumped him falling down on my pretty behind. When I looked up and saw him I was already smitten.”

“Mom?”

“Yes, sweetie?”

“Did I tell you how I met Jess?”

“Not that I recall, why?”

“Because it was very similar to the way you and dad met, but I was walking and bumped Jess, and I was the one that fell down. I think I fell for her the first time I looked up and saw her eyes. I guess it was pretty similar to the way you and dad met.”

“It sure looks that way sweetie, but we never know what the future holds. Your relationship with Jess might grow deeper and last for a long time or it might end pretty quickly too.”

“I hope it doesn’t end.”

“If it’s meant to be, it won’t. I just want you to be happy sweetie. I don’t care if you date a boy or a girl as long you are happy.” She said and hugged me.

  

  

After breakfast I went upstairs to change and get ready before the girls arrived. I changed and was fixing my makeup how the girls taught me to, I went with a very light daytime look, basically all I could do for the moment without looking like a clown. I used just a bit of mascara and lipstick. It’s strange how things can change in such a short time. I guess in the end things worked out for the best, even if I almost died in the process. I guess that in a way it is exactly what happened. That night the boy me died and let the girl me to surface. Don’t get me wrong, I know I am the same person as before, it’s just the way I look at things changed. And I had more fun these last couple days than ever before. Yes, things have been happening pretty fast but I think if it wasn’t that way I would still be moping around thinking and afraid of doing things, mom and Steph know that and I guess that’s why they are pushing me. If they didn’t I probably wouldn’t have met Liz, Karen and Mandy yet and they seem to be pretty nice girls. That’s another thing I seem to have made more friends this weekend than on my entire life before. Oh well… I guess it’s time I stop rambling and go back down before Jess and Steph arrive.

I went downstairs and sat beside mom on the sofa. She had a very thoughtful look before looking at me and say “Sweetie, we are not going to fast, are we?”

“Well, you are doing things pretty fast but I’m not complaining, actually I’m having a lot of fun and made quite a few new friends.”

“You know that if things get too fast for you, you can just tell us, right?”

“I know mom.” I said and hugged her. Yes I’m becoming a hug addict. What can I say? They do feel nice.

  

  

“Mom, something has changed, hasn’t it?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, we never used to talk like this. I feel closer to you now than before.”

“I guess I’m starting to relate to you as my daughter, and girls usually share a lot more than guys.”

“I noticed that, and I like the way we are relating to each other now, it feels good. I think that’s something I always wanted.”

At that moment the doorbell rang and I ran to open the door. “Hi Jess, Hi Steph.”

“Hi beautiful.” Jess said and gave me light kiss on my lips.

“Hi Sam” Steph greeted me.

“Hi girls, are you ready to go?” Mom said.

“Hi Aunt Carla, we are ready to go.” Jess said.

“So let’s go give our little Sam here a makeover.” She said and we left the house.

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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Arriving at the salon mom talked to the receptionist and soon I was being directed to one of the chairs where a hair stylist was already waiting for me. She was a very pretty girl on her early twenties I guess with a short but very feminine hairstyle.

“Hi, you must be Sam.” She said

“Y…yes.”

“My name is Amy. Do you have any preference for a hairstyle?”

“Not really, Amy. My two friends together with my mom brought me here today. It’s my first time at a hair salon.”

“So you want to get rid of the tomboy look?”

“Yes, Pretty much.”

“Let’s see what we can do then.” Said and started to mess with my hair a bit. “Your hair isn’t very long, it’s pretty short actually, but I think I know just the style for you, if you decide to trust me.”

“Okay.”

Next I had a very relaxing time while my hair was shampooed and my scalp massaged. A few smelly chemicals were also used on my hair, something that I think it was a hair dye because it had the same smell as the stuff my mom uses sometimes at home. I had my nails done and after a while I had my hair washed again. Amy then started to cut my hair and talk a lot at the same time. It was kind of relaxing actually because while we talked I didn’t pay much attention to what was happening to my hair. After she started to pluck my eyebrows and damn it hurt. She plucked a lot of my eyebrows out and I hope there are some left. She also used some makeup on my face, saying it was a very light daytime look.

When she finished styling my hair she turned the chair so I could look at what she did. When I looked at the mirror I saw something that I didn’t think it was possible. Looking back at me was this pretty blonde girl with a very short but still very feminine hair style. (I need to show you guys a picture later.) Her light makeup was also very nicely done.

“Wow.” Was all I could say and Amy beamed at that.

“Do you like it?” She asked me.

“Like it? I love it.” I told her.

“Let’s go show your new look for your friends and your mother.”

“Okay.” I said and followed her.

Arriving at the reception area, Mandy, Karen and Liz had already arrived and they were all in deep conversation. ’Wow, it has been over two hours?’ I thought and looked at my cell phone watch and indeed it was over noon already.

They all looked at me and for a moment it seems they didn’t recognize me and suddenly I heard Jess and Steph squeal at the same time. “Sam!!!”

“Ouch, my ears. You two will still make me deaf screaming like that.” I told them.

“Wow you look amazing.” Steph said.

“I am at loss of words, you look so… so… beautiful.” Jess said and hugged me tightly.

“Thank you, Jess.”

I looked at the others and their mouths were hang open and mom had a tear in her eyes.

“Mom? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong, sweetie. You look so beautiful.” She said.

  

  
Mom paid and I think left a very generous tip for Amy by the look on her face. Soon we were all having lunch in a very nice dinner.

“I can’t believe how beautiful you look.” Liz said.

“Thanks, Liz.” I said blushing.

“I can’t see how anyone could ever think you were a boy.” Karen added. “I can’t believe I used to think you were one.”

“I don’t blame you, Karen. I didn’t know for sure myself until I almost died last week.” I told her.

“WHAT?” Both Karen and Mandy screamed.

“You two didn’t know? That’s why I been out of school most of the week.”

“No we didn’t. What happened?” Mandy asked.

I looked at Liz and Steph who both gave me a little nod like saying I could tell them what happened.

“I had a severe allergic reaction to a shot that was given me Tuesday to kick start my puberty. I was still trying to be a boy my dad could be proud of, but what happened was that my body is extremely allergic to testosterone and I almost died. Actually from what I been told I did have a cardiac arrest during the night.”

“You mean your heart stopped?” Karen asked.

“Yes it did, but as you can see they clearly were able to resuscitate me. The thing is that because of that I could never be able to have a male puberty, and the only option for me to have a normal healthy life was to have a female one.”

“Oh god, it must have been a hard decision to make.” Mandy said.

“Actually, not so much.” I told her. “I guess my brain was always wired like a girls. I was shocked at first but now I think I am the person I should always have been. I hope you girls don’t think I ever tried to fool you. The person you see in front of you is the real me and not that boring, quiet and depressed geeky boy.”

“All I can say is, wow. I would have never guessed. You look so natural.” Mandy told me.

“It is natural. This is the real me.”

“Then I would be proud to still be your friend.” She told me.

“Me too.” Karen agreed.

“Thank you.” I told them with misty eyes.

“I hope to see the real you at school tomorrow.” Liz said.

“School?”

“Yes, silly. School.”

“Mom, what am I going to do? All my records show me as a boy and that’s who they are expecting tomorrow. If I show up like this I don’t know what will happen. The teachers expect me to be a boy and I don’t know if I can be him anymore.”

“Don’t worry sweetie. I’ll call the hospital tomorrow morning and try to sort things out. You can stay home tomorrow.”

“Thanks mom.”

“I got an idea.” Liz said.

“What?” We all said together.

“Something that will probably make things easier for you when you go back to school.” She said cryptically.

“What is that?” I asked her.

“You know how the rumor mill works at school, right?”

“Yes I do, so?”

“So we can start a rumor Monday. One that says you are really a girl and was at the hospital because you almost died before they found out. I think that’s close enough to the truth for it to work. Not that a complete lie wouldn’t but keeping as close to the truth as possible will help us to keep our stories straight.”

“I think it can work.” Jess said.

“I think so too.” Steph agreed and the other girls nodded.

“So are we all in agreement on how to help out Sam at school?” Jess asked.

“Yes!!!” they all chorused.

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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After lunch we decided to go watch a movie, so we went to the cinema to see what was showing. After a lot of discussion we decided to watch Inception. Most girls seemed to want to watch it because of Leonardo DiCaprio. I would rather watch Resident Evil: Afterlife in 3D myself. (Yes I did watch the other 3 movies and played the games.)

Mom said she would pick us up after the movie and we went to buy our tickets. Once inside we went to the concession stand to get some sodas and some candies as we were still a bit too full to eat popcorn. After we paid, we were going to the theater room when we met two boys from our year and I froze, they were jocks from the football team. I never really talked to them, but at least they weren’t among the ones that usually bullied me.

“Hey, girls.” The tall one, Stan said. Stan is about 6’4” with short black hair.

“Hey.” Karen said.

“What are you going to watch?” Mark is also a big guy but a couple inches shorter than Stan with blond hair.

“We are going to watch Inception. And you?” Mandy asked them.

“Cool, we are going to watch the same movie.” Mark told us.

“Who is the new girl?” Stan asked looking at me.

“Who? Me?” I asked nervously.

“Yes, I don’t remember seeing you before, and I would certainly remember a pretty face like yours.” He said with a big smile.

“I… I…”

“Stan, you are scaring the poor girl, she is incredibly shy.” Liz told him.

“Sorry, I just wanted to know her name.” He told her.

“I can’t believe you don’t recognize her, she has been in our English class since freshman year.” Liz said and he looked confused.

“Well, she didn’t use to look this good. We are just trying beat the tomboy look out of her.” Steph said and I was holding Jess hand tightly afraid of them and she squeezed my hand reassuringly.

“Tomboy?” Mark asked and Stan kept looking at me.

“You girls are trying to say that this girl is Sam?” Stan asked.

“Yes, can you believe that such a beauty was hidden under those clothes and ragged look?” Mandy asked them.

“Unbelievable.” Both boys said.

“I though Sam was a boy.” Mark said.

“Apparently Sam has been a girl all along but was misidentified at birth.” Liz told them.

“How so?”

“Well, she went to the hospital during the week and they just found out.” Mandy said.

“Are you shitting me?” Mark said.

“Does she look like a boy?” Jess asked.

“No she doesn’t.” Stan said.

“I have to agree with you on that. She is too pretty to be a boy.” Mark agreed. “This must be hell for you.” He added.

“What?” I asked him.

“Find out that you are really a girl.” He said.

“Actually now I’m happier than before, I always knew something was off and I never fit in. When I found out I am a girl, things actually started to make sense. I’m happier now than ever before.”

“I can’t say I understand, but if you want I’d like to be your friend. There are a lot of guys at school that I think will try to give you a hard time.” Stan said.

“Thanks Stan.” I said and give him a kiss on his cheek and he went red.

“Hey I want to be your friend too. Does it mean I also get a kiss?” Mark quickly said and the girls giggled.

“Sure, Mark.” I said and give him a kiss on the cheek too.

“Okay, okay. That’s enough. Let’s go in or we will miss the trailers.” Jess said.

  

  

The movie was great, and to be able to snuggle with Jess in the dark of the theater was even better. No we didn’t kiss, there were too many people around and I don’t know if we are really dating or not yet. I know we have feelings for each other, but we still didn’t have a proper date yet.

After we left the movies we went outside to wait for mom to pick us up.

“Sam, if anyone gives you a hard time at school, just come to us, okay?” Mark said and Stan nodded.

“Thanks guys, I hope things go well at school. I know that some will never accept me, but so far I been very lucky to have made such good friends in so little time.” I said getting my eyes misty again.

Mom soon arrived and we said our goodbyes. Entering the car mom asked us. “How was the movie, girls?”

“It was great mom, the movie was pretty nice and a bit crazy too, and the company was even better.”

“Who were the two boys with you?”

“They are from our school, mom.”

“Did they recognize you?”

“Not at first but they are some of the nice ones. When we told them who I was they were pretty cool about it.”

“That’s great, sweetie. I hope things won’t be too hard for you at school.”

“I hope so.”

“I talked to Jess’ father today and he managed to get you an appointment with the psychiatrist tomorrow at 10:00. Don’t ask me how he managed that on a Sunday but I’m glad he did it. He also said he will give us some papers we need for us to send the school and start the ball rolling on your name and status change.”

“That fast?” I asked her.

“That’s dad for you. When he puts his mind on something there is no stopping him.” Jess said proudly.

“He also invited us for dinner tonight. Steph can go too if she wants too.”

“Do you want to go Steph?” I asked her.

“That would be great.” Jess added.

“Sure, just let me call mom and tell her that I’m going to have dinner with you guys.” She said and picked up her cell phone. A quick call to her mom and we were set.

“So, are we going home first or are we going to Jess’ place already.”

“I think we can go to her place already, unless you want to go home and change.” Mom said.

“I think she looks great already.” Jess said.

“Then it’s settled.” Mom said.

  

  

It didn’t take us long to get to Jess’ home and as soon Jess opened the door she yelled again. “MOOOM! I’M HOME”

“Ouch! My ears. Do you have to do that every time?” I asked.

“Ooops, sorry.” She said and gave me a light kiss.

“Hmmmm…. You are forgiven.” I told her with a smile.

“Hi everyone. You got here early.” Cathy said.

“I told them to mom, that way we can spend some time chatting.” Jess said.

“Also I could help you out in the kitchen.” Mom said.

“That would be great Carla. Sam you look simply stunning.”

“Thanks aunt Cathy.”

“Aunt Cathy?”

“You don’t like it? It’s just that Jess and Steph call mom aunt Carla and I though…”

“Don’t worry Sam. I liked it.” She said.

“Thank you.” I told her shyly.

“Let’s go upstairs and talk girls.” Jess said, grabbed my hand and Steph’s and dragged us upstairs.

  

  

We talked for a long time, it felt nice to be close to Steph again and to cuddle with Jess was great too. I love Steph like a sister, but with Jess it’s something completely different, the feelings I have about her are so strong that’s scary. I can’t imagine myself without her anymore.

“Are you okay, Sam?” Jess asked. “You got a little quiet all the sudden.”

“Sorry, Jess. I was just thinking.” I told her.

“About?”

“Us.”

“What about us? Are you having second thoughts?” She asked worriedly.

“It’s not that, Jess. It’s just that I fell in love so quickly and so strongly about you that it’s scary. And we didn’t even had a single proper date yet.”

“I know how you feel, Sam. I feel the same way and it is scary, but it’s scarier to me not to be with you. And we do need to have a proper date real soon.”

“Do you think that’s how love really feels like?” I asked her.

“I don’t know, but I sure want to find out if this is really love.” She said and gave me a lingering kiss.

“Get a room you two.” Steph said in mock disgust.

Jess looked around and said. “Steph, this is my room.” And I giggled at that.

“Touch锝 It was all Steph said before giggling too.

  

  

Dinner was great and we had a lot of fun talking. Jess’ dad said I looked amazing and was impressed how fast I seemed to be adapting. What can I say? This is who I am and when I stopped pretending to be something else most things came naturally. Aunt Cathy seemed impressed too and the girls just said they were great teachers and I was an even greater student.

The dinner passed quickly and soon it was time for us to go home. We said our goodbyes and Jess walked us to the car.

“Goodbye, beautiful. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” She said and gave me a quick kiss.

“Thanks lover. Call me when you get back from school.”

“Bye Jess.” Steph said.

“Bye Steph.”

We drove Steph home first and soon we were parking at our garage.

“It was a great day mom, thank you.” I told her and hugged as soon we entered.

“Thanks, sweetie. I’m glad you had fun.” Mom said.

“Good night mom.”

“Good night, sweetie. Sleep well.”

“Thanks mom, you too.”

I went upstairs and took a quick shower before getting ready to bed. I lay down and started to wonder what the future will bring. Right now things look pretty good, but will it last?

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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I woke up at 8:00 the next morning. At least I don’t need to wake up so early while I’m not going to school. I do miss school though, especially now that I seem to finally have made some friends.

(Insert morning routine and uneventful breakfast here, you know the drill)

We left home a little over 9:30 and soon we were at the hospital, It didn’t take long for me to get called in for my appointment with Dr. Walker.

“Hello Sam. How are you feeling today?” She asked me.

“Hello Dr. Walker. I’m feeling pretty well, thank you.”

“Your appearance changed a lot since last time I saw you.”

“In a good way I hope.” I said smiling.

“If you are feeling good about yourself I can’t see how it would be any other way.”

“Thank you Dr.”

“Please call me Amanda.”

“Okay.”

“So, what brings you here today?”

“I’m worried about going back to school. The staff expects a boy to show up and some of the students already expect me as a girl.”

“You already met some of your classmates as a girl?”

“Yes, and they were very nice to me. We even met a couple of the boys of our year yesterday at the movies.”

“Apparently you had a busy weekend. Why don’t you tell me about what happened since I last saw you?”

I told her everything that happened since I got out of the hospital, the slumber party, shopping, the trip to the salon and the movies. I also told her about my dream with daddy.

“You really did have some pretty exiting days. How do you feel about it?”

“I had the time of my life. I had lots of fun. I did get a bit uncomfortable sometimes but it passed quickly.”

“You do seem to be adapting to being a girl much faster than I expect.”

“I think what happened is not that I am adapting to be a girl, I just stopped pretending to be something I’m not. I also think that my dream with daddy helped a lot too.”

“It was a very nice dream. Do you think he would have come to accept the new you?”

“Now I’m pretty sure he would. When I woke up the morning after the dream I thought it was just a dream, but I’m not sure about it anymore.”

“What do you mean? You think it might really been your father?”

“After I told mom about my dream she told me the dream she had with my father the same night, and in both dreams he did accept us and asked us to move on and to say goodbye. He also said he was proud of me for finally being true to myself.” I said feeling the tears building up. “Since then I felt much more comfortable in my own skin. I guess that was a defining moment for me.”

“I can’t say for sure if it was your father or not, but I’d like to believe it was him letting you know that he would be proud of you as long you are true to yourself. You carried a lot of guilt over his death, didn’t you?”

“More than I can say with words. Now I see that I’m not responsible for his actions, but I still wish he could be here with us. I miss him so much.”

  

  
We talked for a long time and in the end she called my mom to talk to her for a bit, so I waited in the reception area. Luckily I brought a magazine with me as I still refuse to touch the ones there.

After about 20 minutes my mom left her office with a smile but looked like she had been crying.

“Are you okay, mom?”

“I’m fine sweetie. It was just a little emotional, that’s all.”

“I’m glad you are okay, mom.”

“Thank you, sweetie. Also I have some good news for you.”

“Oh? Tell me.”

“She gave me the papers needed for us to change your status. You need to think of a middle name now.”

“I already have the perfect one mom, Erika.”

“You mean after grandma?” she said sniffing.

“Yes mom. Do you think she would approve?”

“I’m sure she would. That’s exactly the middle name I was going to give you if you were born a girl.”

“I’m happy you liked it. I don’t remember grandma much, but I know I loved her very much and she was always very nice to me.”

“I think she was the first one that ever noticed you were a bit different, sweetie. She used to say that you should have been born a girl. You were such a sweet child. She used to say you acted exactly how I did at that age. Sometimes she treated you like you were her granddaughter and you seemed to love it when she did that.”

“How old was I?”

“I think it was when you were around 4 or 5. She died not long after that. I still miss her.”

“I miss her too, mom.”

  

  
We went home, mom made a few phone calls and we had a nice quick lunch.

“Sweetie, we need to go to your school in a bit. I made an appointment with the principal to talk about you.”

“Okay mom. I’m going to change then. I don’t want him to have any doubts that I am a girl now.”

“Thinking back I see you were always a girl, sweetie. I’m sorry I didn’t notice it before.”

“Don’t worry about it, mom. It’s true it wasn’t easy for me, but I don’t think I would change anything.”

“You mean If you had the chance to be born a girl you wouldn’t take it?”

“I think I wouldn’t mom.”

“Why not?”

“Because I am who I am because of everything I went through. If I was born a normal girl I wouldn’t be me anymore. I would be someone else. I like to think that what I went through and what I am going through will make me a better person in the end. All the good and the bad things that happen in our lives define who we are. It doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be tempted though.”

“Are you sure you are only 16?”

“Why do you say that?”

“That was very deep, sweetie. It is the kind of thing I would expect to hear from an adult and not from a teenager.”

“Mom, I have been thinking a lot and this is just one of the things I been thinking about. If anything in my past changed it would mean that my life would have been different now. That also means that maybe I would have never been friends with Steph or fallen for Jess. Who knows, I might have ended up a real bitch.”

“That’s a very mature way to see things. I really did miss seeing my daughter growing up, didn’t it?”

“Just in some aspects, in others I am still like a little girl that needs her mommy.” I said and hugged her.

“Just don’t grow up too fast. I do want to get to know my daughter before she spread her wings.”

“I won’t mom.”

  

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To be continued....

 

  

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We arrived at school a little after 2:00 and soon we were in the principal’s office reception area where someone new was sitting at the secretary desk. She looked at us and said. “Good afternoon. What can I do for you?”

“We have an appointment with Principal Addams.” Mom said.

“Mrs. Evans, right?”

“Yes, and you are?”

“I’m Megan Wells, I just got transferred here this morning.”

“What happened to Miss Jenkins?” I asked her.

“I’m not sure yet, but seems she messed up pretty badly and got fired this morning.”

“Oh. I wonder what happened.”

“I think you will find out pretty soon. You know how the gossip grapevine works in a high school.” She said and I nodded. “Let me tell him you arrived.” She added.

She then used her intercom to talk to Mr. Addams and she lead us into his office. Once inside he greeted us.

“Good afternoon Mrs. Evans, what can I do for you?” He asked. “Oh, and who is the young lady with you today, a new student?”

“Not exactly, she is the reason we came to see you today.” Mom told him.

“Go on.” He said with a curious look.

“I got these papers to change my daughter’s name and status in her school records.” Mom said giving him the papers.

He looked at the papers and then looked at me and asked. “You are telling me that this young lady is your daughter Samantha that used to be your son Sam?”

“Yes, Mr. Addams. Is there any problems with that?”

“Not at all Mrs. Evans, actually Miss Jenkins was fired this morning because of a student that was wrongfully identified as a boy at birth came this morning to talk to me before heading to class. She arrived and Miss Jenkins went ballistic on her and got fired. I won’t allow bigotry in this school, be it from the staff or the students.”

“Anyone I know?” I asked him.

“I can’t tell you that, but I’m sure you will find out soon.”

“Will I have the same problem with Miss Wells that the girl had with Miss Jenkins this morning?”

“No you won’t. I talked to her lengthily today and she is a very nice young woman.”

“Why are you so accepting?” Mom asked him.

He looked at us for a moment, then looked up like he was remembering something and said. “What I’m about to tell you, I don’t want to become public knowledge, okay?”

“Okay, we won’t say a word to anyone unless you say so.” Mom said and I agreed.

“I had a younger brother that was killed while on high school. He was pretty much like you, but he didn’t let anyone know about his feelings. He was always depressed and I had no idea how to help him. One day I got home after a football practice and found him dead in our room. He took a full bottle of sleeping pills and left a letter for us asking for our forgiveness but he couldn’t live a lie anymore. In that letter was all his feelings and that he couldn’t take it anymore. At that time he started to bulk up and grew up a lot, I think that’s what took him over the edge.” He told us sadly.

“Oh God! I’m so sorry.” Mom told him and I was in tears.

“Ever since then I read a lot about transgender issues. I wanted to understand him and what I found out really worried me. I found out that many transgendered people were bullied all through their school years, and many killed themselves. The chance of a transgendered person to kill himself or herself is much greater than the general population. When I got this job I promised myself to never allow that to happen to my students, but I didn’t count on Miss Jenkins cover up to the bullies when someone that looked a little different was bullied like you or the other girl.” He said and mom looked at me with a worried expression.

“Did you ever think about killing yourself Sam?” Mom asked me.

I didn’t say anything, just looked at the floor ashamed and mom hugged me.

“Oh sweetie, don’t ever think about it again. You are everything I have left and I love you. Promise me you always tell me when something bothers you.”

“I promise mom. You are the reason I never did anything, you know. I couldn’t bring myself to bring you such a pain. I love you too much to hurt you mom.” I said and we hold each other crying for a few minutes.

“Okay, ladies. I gave the papers to Miss Wells and tomorrow we are expecting Samantha to come to class.” He told us.

“Huh? When did you give her the papers?” I asked him.

“I gave her the papers while you were having your little moment. I thought you two would like a few moments for yourselves.”

“Thank you, Mr. Addams.” Mom told him.

“Call me Adam, Mrs. Evans.”

“Only if you call me Carla.” She said with a smile.

’Is he flirting with mom?’ I thought to myself.

“That’s a deal. I’ll keep an eye on Sam for you Carla.”

“Thank you Adam. Mrs. Addams is a very lucky lady.”

“I’m not married Carla. I haven’t found the right woman for me yet.”

’I think they both are flirting. I have to get out of here.’

“Mom, I think I’m going to wait for the girls outside. I’ll see you at home soon, okay?”

“Are you sure you don’t need a lift, sweetie?”

“Yes mom, I’ll walk home with Jess and Steph.”

“Okay sweetie, see you at home.” She said and kissed me on my cheek.

“Bye mom, thank you Mr. Addams.”

“Goodbye Sam and see you tomorrow.” He said.

  

  
I left the room and saw Miss Wells seated at her desk. “Goodbye, Miss Wells. It was nice to meet you.”

“It was nice to meet you too, Sam. If you don’t mind me say so, I think you are doing the right thing. You are way too pretty to be a boy. I am still having trouble believing.” She told me.

“Thank you Miss Wells. That means a lot to me.”

“I hope you don’t have much trouble, but if you do, come to me and I’ll handle it, okay?”

“Thank you. I will.”

“See you soon, Sam.” She said and finger waved at me.

“Bye.” I said waving back the same way and went my way to the entrance of the school before the final bell rang.

  

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To be continued....

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Previously:
 
“It’s true, Jess.” Sam never went on a date before. The old Sam was too much of a loner. We did hang out a lot together until last year, but we always were like sisters.” Steph said.

“Ohhhhh!! That will be so much fun. What do you think of a dinner and movie?” Jess asked.

“It sounds good to me.”

“That’s settled then.” She said.

“Oh, I have a problem though.” I said.

“What is that?” Steph asked.

“I don’t have anything to wear.”
 

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Chapter 24
 
Jess and Steph looked at me funnily for a few seconds after I said that and started to laugh.

“Why are you two laughing? Did I say something funny?” I said pouting.

Jess came to me, gave me a big hug and said. “I’m sorry we laughed, Sam. It’s just that…” she stopped uncertain of what to say.

“Just that…?” I said.

“I’ll answer that, Jess.” Steph said. “Sam, how long have you been living as a girl?”

“You know how long, Steph.”

“I know, but I want you to say it anyway.”

“I guess since Friday night, when the both of you and Liz made me your personal Barbie doll.”

“So, that’s how many days?” Jess asked me.

“Can’t either of you do math?”

“We can, but I think I know where Steph is getting at.” Jess said.

“Let me see…. Today is Tuesday so it makes 4 days.” I said. “Just 4 days? I can’t believe it.”

“Yes, Sam. It has been only 4 days. Of course you made the decision a few days before.” Jess told me.

“And you took being a girl as a fish to the water.” Steph added.

“But I am just being myself.” I said.

“We know that, but you kinda surprised us when you said that.” Jess said.

“Said what?” I asked confused.

“Did you forget already?” Steph asked me.

“The ‘I have nothing to wear for my date’ thing?” I asked.

“Yes, we just went to the mall this weekend and your mom bought you several new outfits, you didn’t use almost anything yet.” Steph said.

“I know, but I don’t have anything that neither of you didn’t see me wearing already. I had to model them all to you and I wanted to wear something that Jess didn’t see me in.” I said in tears.

“Oh sweetie, don’t cry.” Jess said holding me tightly. “I can understand that.”

“Sam, what made what you said earlier so funny is that it reminded us of our own reactions right after getting asked on a date before.” Steph said.

“Really?”

“Yes, Sam. We might have everything we need but for a date we always want to look extra special and have doubts to what to wear and the ‘I have nothing to wear’ bit comes to our minds, sometimes we even say it out loud too.” Jess said. “I do see your point now. It’s true that I saw everything you have already. Actually we helped you to buy everything you have now.”

I look at Steph and see her eyes practically scintillating now.

“Huh, Steph?”

“Yes?”

“Why are your eyes scintillating?”

“I just got a little idea, that’s why.”

“Do I dare to ask what it is?”

“Oh, I see.” Jess said.

“See what?” I was utterly and completely clueless now.

“I know that look.” Jess said.

“What kind of look is that?”

“It’s the let’s go shopping look.”

“Oh, I thought it was the ‘Are you ready to be a Barbie doll again?’ look.”

“Well… actually Sam isn’t technically wrong, because she will feel a little like a Barbie doll again.” Steph said and giggled.

“But if we go shopping Jess will see the outfit before our date.”

“Just the both of us, silly. Jess won’t come this time.” Steph said.

“Oh.”

“Also I want to get me something new, just in case.” Steph added.

“In case of what?” I asked.

“In case I get a date Friday too.” She added.

“Do you think he will ask you out?” Jess asked.

“I hope so.” Steph said with a dreaming look in her eyes.

“I noticed how you two have been exchanging looks today. I think he might. Maybe if we have a little word with his sister she might help to make it happen.”

“You think it will help?” Steph asked.

“I think Sam is right, she can help. I know she noticed the way you two look at each other too.” Jess said.

“I think everyone saw it at lunch today.” I added.

Steph blushed and said. “Was it that obvious?”

“Only a guy wouldn’t have noticed.” Jess said and giggled.

“I’m glad I’m not one then.” I said.

“No you are not. You are becoming a very girly girl.” Steph said and giggled.

“I guess it’s because I am making up for the lost time.”

“I don’t mind you being a girly girl, as long you are my girly girl.” Jess said and gave me a light kiss on my lips.

“I don’t mind it either.” I said and smiled.
 

 
As soon I got home I opened the front door and yelled “MOOOOM I’M HOME!!”

’I’m starting to act just like Jess.’ I thought to myself and giggled.

Mom came downstairs and said.

“Hi sweetie. Did you take some lessons from Jess? How did your first day at school go?”

“Hi, mom. Sorry about that, it’s just that I’m a little excited right now. Things went pretty well at school I think but a little strange too.”

“Let’s hear why you are excited first and then you tell me about your first day back at school. How does that sound?”

“I have a date Friday night and I need to get a new outfit.” I said.

“A date?”

“Yes, Jess asked me out on a date.” I said.

“That’s great sweetheart, but why do you need a new outfit? I thought we bought quite a few just a few days ago.”

“But Jess saw me wearing them all. I want to wear something she didn’t see me wearing yet.”

“Okay sweetie, do you want me to take you to the mall?”

“There is no need mom, Steph and I will go there tomorrow after school, right after we walk Jess home.”

“Do you need a lift?”

“Maybe to get back home. I don’t want to impose, mom.”

“You are not imposing, sweetie.”

“Okay.”

“I just got an idea.” Mom said.

“What?”

“Call me when you are almost done and we can grab a bite to eat at the mall. That way I don’t need to cook tomorrow.”

“I’d like that. I think Steph will too.”

“I’m glad you two are friends again. She has been very good to you.”

“I know. I can’t believe how stupid I was to think she would do anything to hurt me. I still feel bad about it.”

“You were feeling hurt and betrayed, when something like this happens it can be devastating, especially when its someone you trust and love.”

“That’s true. I was a mess after that, wasn’t I?”
“I won’t lie to you, Sam. Yes, you got me worried for a while. You were always so sad and refused to talk about it.”

“I’m sorry mom. I promise I’ll never bottle up things inside again.”

“You know you can always talk to me, right?”

“I do, and I promise I’ll always talk to you when something is bothering me, or when something makes me happy or I’ll just talk to you because I love to talk to you.”

“Thanks, sweetie.”

“Oh, I just remembered something.”

“What is that?”

“Don’t you have a date Saturday?”

“You know I do.”

“I’ll have to talk to Steph than and you HAVE to come to the mall with us. You need something new too. I want my mom to look the best for her date.”

“How did you know I was thinking of buying something new for my date?”

“Mom, you didn’t buy new clothes since dad died. I think it’s time for you to start renewing your wardrobe and I want to help.”
“Okay, sweetie. If Steph agrees I will go to the mall tomorrow with you to get a new dress for my date. We can start building up my wardrobe a little later when we have a little more time.”

“Okay mom.”

“Now tell me about your day.”
 

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Previously:
 

“I’ll have to talk to Steph than and you HAVE to come to the mall with us. You need something new too. I want my mom to look the best for her date.”

“How did you know I was thinking of buying something new for my date?”

“Mom, you didn’t buy new clothes since dad died. I think it’s time for you to start renewing your wardrobe and I want to help.”
“Okay, sweetie. If Steph agrees I will go to the mall tomorrow with you to get a new dress for my date. We can start building up my wardrobe a little later when we have a little more time.”

“Okay mom.”

“Now tell me about your day.”

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Chapter 25
 

Mom and I talked about my day for a long time and she got upset when she found out about the reporters in front of the school this morning but somewhat relieved that they weren't looking for me. I am still a bit worried that they might come to create more problems when they find out about me, I also want to talk to Joan about that sometime, it must be hard to be in the spotlight like that. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that it isn't me that they weren't after, but I don't think it's right for her to go through that alone, although I have no idea what I can do to help.

After dinner I went to have a long relaxing bath, and do my homework. I sighed when I thought about it as I still have a lot of homework to do because of all the homework I missed from last week.

After I finished my homework for the day I went to bed and thought about everything that happened these last couple weeks.

I still can't believe it has just been four days since I started to live as a girl. Has it been just four days? Maybe I'm thinking about it the wrong way, it has been four days that I stopped hiding who I am. I still wonder if daddy would accept me, I like to think that the dream I had about him was more than just a dream, but the doubt still pains me a little. I miss him so much.

There is also something else nagging me, but I can't really put my finger on what it is. The change in Tom's, I mean Tommy's behavior seems too drastic in such a short time. I'm still going to keep my eye on him for a little while before deciding if I can trust him or not. I'm glad he saved me from David today, but it could be a set up. One more thing to talk about with Joan. He said she forgave him and if she really did so I guess I can too, but first I need to talk to her. Also I need to find a way to talk to her about Steph's interest in her brother. I think he is interested in her too.

Thinking back I hadn't much time to myself these last few days, everything happened so fast and I still didn't have the time to just think about it. Not that I would want it to be any other way. I had more fun these last four days than I had in years, and it's good to be able to be myself too. It has been a bit overwhelming but worth it. Of course I need to talk to the girls to give me a little quiet time for me sometimes so I can just relax and think about things.

 

 

* “Wake up pumpkin.” I hear a voice say I slowly open my eyes and see dad sat down on my bed.

“Dad?”

“Hello pumpkin.” He said with a big smile on his face.

“DADDY!!” I yelled and gave him a biiiiiiiig bear hug. “I missed you sooooo much.”

“I'm happy to see you too, princess.”

“What are you doing here? Is this another dream?”

“If this is or isn't a dream is up to you to decide, and I'm here because you brought me here.”

“I brought you here? How?”

“You are having trouble moving on, you still feel guilty about what you are doing and unsure of my acceptance of you.”

“How can I be sure of that? You died because I dressed as a girl and you freaked out. How can I not feel guilty about it?”

“Princess, you need to stop blaming yourself. I am the only one to blame for what happened. I made you suffer in a way no parent should ever make their child suffer.”

“But... but... if... I... hadn't...” I tried to say between sobs.

“Don't cry, princess. It was not your fault.” He said holding me tight. His embrace made me feel so warm and safe.

“I don't want you to leave, Daddy. I need you so much.”

“I know you need me, but I don't have a choice. This is the last time I am allowed to talk to you. You need to move on, if not for you, for me, please.”

“You mean this is the last time I'm ever going to see you?”

“Yes, princess. This is the last time you will see me as your father.”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“I think I talked more than I should. I'm sorry princess, but I can't talk about it.”

“I'll I ever find out what are you talking about?”

“Maybe. It will be up to you.”

“Okay. Can I at least have one last hug and kiss?”

“Of course you can, but first I want to give you a little farewell gift.” He said and showed me a necklace with a small round pendant in the shape of a familiar symbol.

“That's so pretty, daddy. What does this symbol mean?”

“That's the yin-yang symbol, do you know it?”

“I heard about it, but I'm not so sure about the exact meaning.”

“That symbol has a lot of meanings, but one of the most common is the feminine/masculine meaning. Each half of the symbol represents one of the opposites and together they represent the unity, completion.”

“But why are you giving me this?”

“You are just starting a journey to find yourself. I am giving you this so you remember where you came from and where you are heading, also to remind you that no one is completely feminine or completely masculine. That's what the dot on each half of the symbol means. We all have a bit of both. Don't be afraid of showing some boyish interests and qualities they are part of who you are and wouldn't be healthy to push that part of you away, the same way it wasn't healthy for you to hide who you are.”

“I think I see what you mean. I will always treasure this, daddy.”

“I know you will, princess. Now give me one last big hug and a kiss.”

“I love you daddy. It is so hard to say goodbye.” I told him while giving a very big hug.

“I know it is. I feel the same way. I love you Sam, and I always will. I want you to live a full and a happy life. Also there is one last thing I need to tell you before I go.”

“What is it?”

“Soon something will happen, something that will make you very happy.”

“What will happen?”

“That I can't tell you, just keep your mind open and pay attention to yourself. There will be some pain but in the end you will be very happy.”

“Pain? Is there needles involved? I hate needles.”

“I can't tell you that. I love you princess, but it's time to say goodbye.”

“Goodbye daddy, I love you.”

“Goodbye, Samantha. I am proud of you.” *

 

 

I woke up feeling refreshed and thought about the dream I had with dad. I still wonder if it was a dream or not. Either way I felt a lot better about myself after the dream, just like last time.

I yawned and stretched before getting up and make a beeline to the bathroom as my bladders feels to be above max capacity already. After relieving myself I take out the nightgown to take my morning shower. I look at myself in the mirror and suddenly I see it. I look down and see the necklace dad gave to me in my dream hanging down from my neck. I reach for the pendant and start to cry. 'Thank you daddy. I now know that it was really you talking to me. I will always treasure this. I love you.' I though to myself looking up towards the heavens.

 

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Previously:
 

I yawned and stretched before getting up and make a beeline to the bathroom as my bladders feels to be above max capacity already. After relieving myself I take out the nightgown to take my morning shower. I look at myself in the mirror and suddenly I see it. I look down and see the necklace dad gave to me in my dream hanging down from my neck. I reach for the pendant and start to cry. 'Thank you daddy. I now know that it was really you talking to me. I will always treasure this. I love you.' I thought to myself looking up towards the heavens.

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Chapter 26
 
I took out the necklace and carefully placed it on the sink counter before having my shower as I didn’t want it to get wet. The dream I had last night was still clear in my head, like the other times I dreamt about dad. Unlike other dreams these feel different as I can still remember them clearly. I’m starting to believe they were more than simple dreams, especially after seeing the necklace. I do believe now that dad would have accepted me and I think the necklace was the way for him to prove to me, eliminating the doubt that lurked inside of me.

After I left the shower I dried myself and took the necklace again. When I grabbed it, the pendant felt warm to the touch and I felt a feeling of love, caring and protection, just like I used to feel around dad when I was young. It was an overwhelming feeling and I started to cry again, wishing he was still with me. I know I need to move on but it’s so hard, but I’ll do my best for his sake and mine too.

I got dressed and went downstairs where mom was still making breakfast. She looked at me and said. “Honey, have you been crying?”

“It shows?”

“What’s wrong? Bad dreams?”

“No mom, I had a wonderful dream, but I think it wasn’t a dream at all.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because of this.” I told her and showed her the necklace.

“That’s a pretty necklace honey, but why does it have to do with your dream?”

“I had a dream about dad again and in the dream he gave me this necklace and when I woke up I was wearing it.”

“Are you sure you didn’t have that necklace before?”

“Mom, did you see it before?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“And no, I didn’t buy it yesterday either.”

“Are you psychic now?”

“No mom, it’s just that I would have though the same thing if I were you.”

“But how could your dad do something like that?”

“I don’t know mom. All I know is that he did it. And that’s not all, mom. I took it out to have my morning shower and when I grabbed it after I dried myself it felt warm, touch it.”

She then came closer to me and touched the pendant, when she did so I saw her face change and she started to cry.

“Mom? Are you okay?”

“Oh sweetie. Why didn’t you tell me that I would feel that?” She said hugging me.

“Feel what?”

“I felt like your father left a piece of himself there. I could feel his love for you and for me.”

“That’s what I felt too. I guess it was his way to say he accept me and will always watch over us.”

“I guess it might be so.”

 

 

After breakfast, I left home and met with Steph and Jess.

Hi, Steph. Hi beautiful.” I greeted them.

“Hi sis.” Steph said.

“Hi sweetie.” Jess said and gave me a big kiss.

“Get a room you two.” Steph mock admonished us.

“I think you are jealous of us.” I told her.

“You can bet your pretty little behind I am.”

“Hey! It’s not that little.” I tell her.

“No it’s not. It is perfect.” Jess said and smacked my bottom.

“Hey. That hurts.” I said and rubbed my poor little behind.

“So, how are you this morning?” Jess asked me.

“I dreamed about dad again, and this one was pretty weird. Well… not the dream that was weird, what happened when I woke up was.”

“Ohhh, you have to tell us.” Steph said and Jess agreed.

I told them about the dream and what dad told me, showed them the necklace and told them what mom and I felt when we touched the pendant.

“That is pretty cool.” Jess said.

“And a little freaky.” Steph added.

“That’s true, but now I feel better about myself.” I told them.

“Really?” Steph asked.

“I thought you were adapting well.” Jess told me.

“I am, but you know how fast things are going. I didn’t have time to catch my breath yet, and this is just my 5th day since I have been a girl full time.”

“If you want we can slow down a bit. I guess we have been pushing it a little.” Jess said.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m having a lot of fun too. I never had so many friends before and I guess things will slow down naturally over time. And I bet Joan is feeling the same way.”

“I guess she might.” Steph said.

“You know, I been thinking. Do you think it’s a coincidence that Joan and I went through similar things at the same time and go to the same school? I mean what are the odds?”

“It must be. What else could it be?” Steph asked.

“I don’t know. Maybe it’s fate?” I asked.

“Do you believe in fate?” Jess asked.

“I guess so. Maybe everything happens for a reason. Maybe there is no such thing as coincidences. Think about it. If I didn’t bumped into you last week I would still be a lonely boy with no friends and Steph and I wouldn’t still be talking. Maybe it was fate that brought us together.”

“I can see that, but that would mean that there is some force or someone behind that manipulating our actions.” Jess said. “And I don’t know if I like that idea.”

“I don’t think it’s like that, Steph. Fate might have brought us together, but we decided to stick together not some invisible force or entity.”

“You mean like god?” Steph asked.

“That or a writer with a very twisted sense of humor.”
“Okay, now you are pulling our legs. That’s the most absurd thing.” Steph said and giggled.

“I know, things were getting a bit heavy and I wanted to light up the mood.”

“I’m glad that your sense of humor didn’t change.” Steph said.

“Why would it change? I’m still the same person inside. The only thing that changed is that I’m much happier now.”

 

 

We arrived at school and met with Joan, Josh and Mindy near the entrance, they were accompanied by another girl that I haven’t met before.

“Hi guys.” I greeted them.

“Hi Sam, Jess, Steph.” Joan greeted us. “I’d like you guys to meet my cousin Diana, she is starting here today.”

“Hi Sam, Joan told me a lot about you.” Diana said.

“Nothing bad I hope.”

“Not at all, she really likes you. She said that in some ways you two are very similar.”

“I guess so. Probably our stories are written by the same writer.” I said and giggled, together with Jess and Steph.

Diana, Joan, Josh and Mindy looked a bit confused and we told them about we said before and soon they were all giggling and laughing.

“Gosh that was so absurd that was funny.” Josh said.

“That’s not so absurd.” Diana said.

“Why not?” Mindy asked.

“Well, many people believe in God or some sort of creator, maybe the writer analogy is not so far off.” Diana explained.

“But wouldn’t it mean we act and say whatever the writer wants us to?” I asked her.

“Probably not, have you ever heard of the multiple universes theory?”

“You mean like the theory that there are an infinite number of universes?” I asked her.

“Yes, and if there is an infinite number of universes I wouldn’t be surprised than in at least one of them someone is writing our stories. It doesn’t mean that someone can influence our actions though.”

“So you mean that the stories we read and movies we watch somewhere in another universe they are real?” Steph asked.

“Exactly.” Diana said.

“I see what you mean, but it’s all a theory, right?” I asked.

“Right.” Diana agreed.

“I sure hope there isn’t a writer telling your story for all his or her world to read.” Joan said.

 

 

We entered the school building. I walked closer to Joan and said. “Joan, can I talk with you for a minute in private for a minute?”

“Sure, let’s go to the ladies and we can talk there.” Joan said.

We went together to the ladies room and after checking it was empty I said. “Joan, I wanted to talk to you about your brother.”

“What about him?”

“I wanted to know if he is seeing someone.”

“Why? Are you interested in him? I thought you were dating Jess.” She said.

“I am dating Jess, and no I’m not interested in him. I’m asking because I have a friend that thinks he is cute and was interested in him.”

“You mean Steph?”

“How did you know?”

“I see how she and Josh keep looking at each other. It’s quite cute actually.”

“So you think he is interested in her?”

“Definitely.”

“Do you think you can convince him to ask her on a date?”

“I can talk to him, but I can’t promise anything. He never been on a date before.”

“Are you kidding? Someone cute as him never been on a date before?”

“No, I’m not kidding, and to tell the truth I never been on a date before.”

“But I thought you were dating Mindy.”

“We are together, but we still need to go on a proper date yet.”

“I’m going to have my first date with Jess Friday night. It will be my very first date. I’m so nervous.”
“Maybe I should ask Mindy on a date.” Joan said with a faraway look in her eyes.

“You should. If it wasn’t our first date we could double date.”

“I think it would be fun, maybe we can double date soon.”

“I’m sure it will be fun. So are you excited about the slumber party Saturday?” I asked her.

“I’m a little nervous about that. And there is the mall raid in the afternoon too.” She said.

“Yeah, I guess the other girls will make us model half the clothes of the mall each.”

“We are going to be their very life size Barbie doll.” She said and giggled.

“I’m pretty sure that’s what they are planning. I went through that last weekend. I had to try a lot of different outfits in the mall and then I had to model all my purchases at home later that night.”

“Oh Gosh, we are doomed.” Joan said giggling.

“You can bet your life on that. Resistance is futile.”

“Oh my, are you a trekkie too?”

“I do like Star Trek, and I can tell you this, the girls are like the Borgs, they want to assimilate us.”

“I can see that.” She said and giggled.
 

 

We were about to leave the ladies room when she notices my necklace. She looks oddly at it for a few seconds and says. “That’s a pretty necklace. Is it new?”

“Yes it is.”

“Where did you buy it?”

“I didn’t. It was a gift.”

“That’s a nice gift. Did Jess give it to you?”

“No it was someone else. It is a very special gift.”

“Can I take a closer look?”

“Sure.”

She then comes closer and gently raises the pendant. When she did so her eyes opened wide and she said. “Where did you get that?”

“What do you mean?” I ask worriedly.

“That is no ordinary necklace. There is something very special about it.” She said.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I tell you.”

“Don’t worry about it, I know you won’t lie to me.”

“How do you know that?”

“I just know it.” She shrugged.

“Okay, it might sound strange but my dad gave it to me.”

“Before he died?”

“No, last night.”

“How?”

“I had a dream about him and he gave it to me in the dream. When I woke up I was wearing it.”

“Oh wow.”

“Do you believe me?”

“How can I not? I can sense something special about the necklace, like it was filled with spiritual energy. Did you feel anything when you touched it?”

“Yes, I felt my father’s love for me.”

“Yes, it is a very special necklace indeed, but why the yin-yang symbol?”

“My father said something about it representing unity, that each one of us have a masculine and feminine side and the yin-yang symbol shows the balance between them and also to remember where I came from and not to be afraid of showing some boyish characteristics.”

“I think he is right.” She said and looked at her bracelet. “And it’s a bit eerie that he chose that symbol.”

“Why is that?”

“Can you see my bracelet?”

“Yes, it is very pretty.” I said looking at it.

“Look closer.” She said lifting her arm and moving her palm upward.

“Oh my God.”

 

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Previously:

“Yes, it is a very special necklace indeed, but why the yin-yang symbol?”

“My father said something about it representing unity, that each one of us have a masculine and feminine side and the yin-yang symbol shows the balance between them and also to remember where I came from and not to be afraid of showing some boyish characteristics.”

“I think he is right.” She said and looked at her bracelet. “And it’s a bit eerie that he chose that symbol.”

“Why is that?”

“Can you see my bracelet?”

“Yes, it is very pretty.” I said looking at it.

“Look closer.” She said lifting her arm and moving her palm upward.

“Oh my God.”

 

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Chapter 27
 

On her bracelet I see the same yin-yang symbol, but unlike my pendant the one in her bracelet is incomplete, showing only half of it.

“That’s so freaky.” I tell her. “But why your bracelet only has half of the symbol?”

“Josh’s has the other half of it. It has to do with our nature.”

“You mean the twins thing?”

“Partially I guess. It’s a little complicated.”

“What do you mean by complicated?”

“I’m sorry Sam, but I can’t tell you that, at least not yet.” She said sadly.

“But will you tell me eventually?”

“Probably. I don’t know why but I feel some connection to you.”

“Is it the symbol thing?”

“Maybe, but I think we met for a reason. I don’t think it’s a coincidence. Would you mind if I let someone take a look at your pendant? She is more knowledgeable about these things than I am.”

“What kind of things?”

“Sam, it might sound strange, but do you believe in magic?”

“To tell you the truth, if you had asked me that question yesterday I would say no, but after what happened to me last night I think I might. Do you think the pendant is magic?”

“I’m not sure. I mean, I sensed something in it when I touched it, but I can’t say what.”

“And do you think that person you want to take a look at my pendant might know?”

“I think so.”

“When can I meet her?”

“You already did. Today is her first day here.”

“You mean Diana?”

“Yeah, I think we can show her during lunch if you are up to it.”

“Sure. I want to know as much as you do. But I won’t take the necklace off.”

“Not even if it is dangerous?”

“How can it be? All I feel from it is a sense of love and protection. I feel it is the most precious gift my father could ever have given me.”

 

 

We left the ladies room and met Jess. It’s amazing how things can change in just a few days. I never had many friends before but now it seems my circle of friends keep growing almost daily.

“Sam, are you okay?” Jess asked me.

“I’m fine, why?”

“You seemed a little distant for a bit.”

“Sorry, I was just thinking how much things changed. I was a loner and now I feel like I’m making new friends almost daily. It’s a bit overwhelming.”

“I know what you mean. To tell you the truth I didn’t have many friends either, but ever since I met you things changed. I don’t mean I was a loner, but I only had very few friends. You know it’s amazing that ever since you let yourself be yourself you seem to attract people to you.”

“Is it a bad thing?”

“As long people don’t start hitting on you, no.”

“Or hitting me.” I added sadly.

“I pity the fool that tries to do that.”

“Why?”

“Because if someone tries something to you, will make a lot of enemies. By now not even most of the jocks will try to do anything to you. Not with half of the cheering squad on your side. If any of them try anything they won’t get a date for the rest of the year.”

“Oh.”

“Now let’s go to class before we get late.”

 

 

The morning passed slowly, it was a bit hard to pay attention to the classes. I kept wondering what is going on. My life has become a little crazy lately. It feels like my life ended up in the Twilight Zone.

“Are you okay?” Jess asked me as we left the classroom for our lunch break.

“I’m fine.”

“You don’t look fine. You seem worried and you been distracted the whole morning.”

“Sorry, it’s just that I think things are finally catching up on me. It feels like my life is completely crazy lately.”

“Do you want us to slow things down?”

“It’s not that part of my life that feels crazy. I think my last dream with my dad and the necklace appearing in the real world like magic when I woke up did that.”

“Oh. I think I know what you mean. I would think my life was crazy if that happened to me too.”

“Also I have the feeling that something bigger is happening and I’m not comfortable with it. I wonder why dad gave me this necklace. It feels that is more than just showing me his acceptance and his love for me.”

“You think there is a way to find out?”

“Yeah. Joan talked to me this morning and wants to show the necklace to Diana.”

“Her cousin? Why?”

“She said she is knowledgeable in these things, whatever she meant by that.”

“Did you and Joan set up a meeting place?”

“Not really. I thought of going to cafeteria like usual and meet her there or on our way. I don’t want to miss lunch even though the cafeteria food sucks big time.”

“The food is not that bad.”

“I had better meals in the hospital Jess. I guess that means something, don’t you think?”

“Okay, you do have a point.” She said and giggled.

 

 

We met with Joan and Diana just before we arrived at the cafeteria.

“Hey Sam, Hey Jess.” Joan greeted us.

“Hi Joan.” We said back in stereo.

“You two met my cousin Diana earlier today, right?”

“Yes we did. Hi Diana.” I said.

“Hi Sam, Hi Jess.”

“I told Diana about the necklace. You want to go somewhere more private for her to look at it?”

“Can Jess come too?” I asked.

“I guess so.” Joan said. “What do you think, Diana?”

“I don’t think it will be a problem.” She said.

“Okay, What about we pick something to eat and then go outside? Fortunately it is not too cold today.” I said.

“Already thought of that.” Diana said and showed us a big paper bag that I haven’t noticed before.

“Is there enough for the four of us?” Jess asked.

“I think there will be enough for all of us.” She said smiling.

 

 

We went outside and found a quiet spot for us to seat and talk, luckily the day was a bit cold but not uncomfortable.

“That is the necklace Joan told me about?” Diana asked me.

“Sure. You think you can tell me something about it?”

“I hope so.”

“So you want me to just show you or you want me to take it off?”

“No need to take it off. But I would like to touch the pendant if you allow me to.”

“Sure.”

She reached out and picked up the pendant, looking at it for a little while with an puzzled look on her face.

“Hmmm… that is interesting. I don’t think I saw something like that before.” She said.

“So you can’t tell me anything about it?” I asked her.

“No, I know what this is.” She said.

“Can you tell us what it is then?” Joan asked.

“Is it dangerous?” I asked worriedly.

“No it’s not dangerous, quite the opposite actually and yes I can tell you what it is.”

“What is it then?” I asked.

“Before I answer that I want to know how you got it. It might answer a few questions I have and give you a better answer.”

“Didn’t Joan tell you?”

“No, she didn’t. I asked her but she felt you should tell me with your own words.”

I told her about my dreams with my father and what he said when he gave me the necklace. Somehow I felt that I needed to be completely honest with her.

I finished telling her and she looked thoughtful for a little while and said. “Thank you for being honest with me. It did answer the questions I had about it. When I first looked at it I sensed something in it. At first I thought it was some sort of spiritual amulet. I was right at that, but it is also much more.”

“What do you mean?” Jess asked.

“That pendant is overflowing with spiritual energy and I sense a small fragment of a soul in it.”

“You mean the pendant is alive?” I asked her.

“Not really. It’s more like an imprint. It’s a very small fragment. I believe your father did that for the feelings it conveys.”

“Are you telling me that I have a little piece of my father with me? If so, why did he do that?”

“There can be a lot of reasons, but I think the main one is to show you his love for you. There are other properties to the pendant too.”

“Which kind of properties?”

“As I said before it is overflowing with spiritual energy. That energy is interacting with your own energies and creating some sort of feedback. Some of that energy is some sort of healing energy and some of it is a protective kind. I never thought a human soul could do something like that.” She said sounding amused.

“So is Sam’s necklace magic?” Joan asked Diana.

“Not on the usual sense. That necklace uses another form of magic, a form of spiritual magic. It’s power comes her father’s love and concern for Sam’s safety and happiness.”

“You said it has some sort of healing energy. Can you tell what kind of effect it will have on Sam?” Jess asked.

“I’m not sure. I never encountered this kind of spiritual healing energy before.”

“You think it is something to heal her spirit?” Joan asked.

Diana shook her head and said. “No, her father already did that on those dreams. That is something else. I think it probably might help her heal faster from injuries, I’m not sure. All I can see about it is that it is active right now, slowly doing whatever it is meant to do.”

“Oh gosh, since when my life became this crazy?” I asked

“I think the moment you bumped into Jess.” Diana said. “That encounter started a chain reaction of events that brought you to where you are. You think you would be happier if that never happened?”

“No way, before I was miserable and lonely. Now I have friends and someone that I fell in love with.” I said holding Jess’ hands tightly. She looked at me and gave a heart melting smile.

“Yes, my life seems like something out of a Twilight Zone episode right now but I wouldn’t change a thing. I just hope things get a little more normal over time.” I said.

“I think normal is overrated. My life was always normal and it was B O R I N G. Things are much more fun now with you around, and it doesn’t matter how crazy things get I’ll be right next to you.” Jess said and kissed me.

“Thank you, Jess. I don’t know if I could deal with everything that is happening to me without you.”

“I can’t say I understand what is happening but I know one thing. When I met you I felt something that I never felt before. It felt like we connected on a spiritual level and it scared and amused me.”

“I know exactly how you feel. I felt the same way. I guess love at first sight do exist.” I said.

“I think it was probably more like love at first bump.” Joan said and we all laughed.

 

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