Mark Morford: San Francisco Newspaper Columnist Extraordinaire

For a light-hearted look at current events through a very slightly twisted mirror.

Originally a loop of fabric* at the back yoke of an Brooks Brothers Oxford shirt, especially the OCBD (Oxford Cloth Button-Down — actually an import from Jolly Old England, where the style was supposedly invented by polo players to keep their collars from flapping about untidily during chukkers) — fancifully-designed to allow the natty dresser to neatly hang said garment in the locker of his athletic club without mussing it. Back in those ancient times (The Fifties and early Sixties) the loop was known as a ‘locker loop’ and was almost a Brooks Brothers trademark, to the extent that they began including a ‘locker loop’ on their casual trousers, even though one might be so naíf as to believe that any one of the ‘belt loops’ used to hang the trousers from a leather belt might perfectly suffice.

It was a staple of the "preppie" look in days of yesteryear, and eventually achieved some status as a more-or-less visible signal that a young man was ‘going steady,’ similar in significance to a young lady wearing her boyfriend’s fraternity pin. The lady in question usually marked her ‘territory’ by reaching behind his neck and ripping off the loop entirely, although some fellows took the sensible precaution of neatly snipping the loop off with a pair of scissors, leaving behind short tags to indicate the absence of the loop. Brooks Brothers shirts weren’t inexpensive, even if one was a trust fund baby.

There are two main — and fairly plausible — theories used to explain the crooked path whereby the sturdy ‘locker loop’ became a ‘fruit loop.’

Theory A: A young man with no damage to his ‘locker loop’ had never had a girlfriend, and was thereby ‘proven’ to be a homosexual. One might think of this as the ‘scientific’ theory.

Theory B: The habitual contempt haboured by many Americans for members of the ‘upper classes,’ whom they likely thought of as ‘effete intellectual snobs’ at best, and therefor likely homosexuals, led them to focus on the prima facie evidence of effete intellectualism — the OCBD in whatever condition of ‘locker loop integrity’ as an unmistakeable sign of ‘unmanliness,’ the type of fellow who drank wine coolers instead of manly beer, and was thus at least a ‘pansy,’ if not a flaming ‘fag.’ One might think of this as the ‘œconomic’ theory.

As for the ‘fruit’ portion of the phrase, it likely originates — at least partially — in the Thirties, when the phrase ‘nutty as a fruitcake’ originated meaning simply ‘crazy,’ ‘silly,’ or ‘idiotic.’ At the time, homosexuality was classified as a mental disorder, to be ‘cured’ with ‘treatments’ of almost unbelievable barbarity, including induced convulsions — through electroshock or insulin injections — meant to ‘help’ the afflicted individual, and even lobotomy.

‘Fruit’ is entirely too precious to be wasted on mere mental patients, however, especially since there’s a parallel etymology through words which had previously referred only to female prostitutes, including a great many words which might strike a chord: ‘faggot, fairy, fruit, gay, punk, queen.’

In Polari, a type of cant with uncertain origins, but at least going back to ‘Punch and Judy’ performers in the Nineteenth Century (possibly up to two centuries earlier or more), thence to circus performers, actors, street pedlars, and thieves (not that these professions were or are mutually exclusive) and the ‘gay’ subculture, the word ‘fruit’ also means ‘queen,’ possibly down to the phrase ‘blessed be the fruit of thy womb’ referring to the Queen of Heaven. Queen originally referred to any woman, and is in fact (as kvin) still the Danish word for ‘woman.’ The ‘queen’ originally just referred to the King's ‘woman,’ but almost every word referring to women eventually becomes associated with something nasty, so soon enough became equivalent to ‘doxy.’

So we find two lines of potential etymology, one relatively recent, and another more ancient, all leading to stereotyping of gay men as either crazy or effeminate, maybe both, both views conforming to popular contempt and hostility toward anything not ‘manly,’ cultural misogyny seamlessly blended with knownothing bigotry.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fruit_%28slang%29#Fruitcake

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_symbols#Freedom_rings

* sometimes attributed to New England sailors who used the loop to hang their shirts to dry sans clothes hangers or clothespins. This seems unlikely, since sailors had very effective methods of hanging clothes to dry which didn’t depend upon fragile loops of cloth. One didn’t, after all, want to see one’s clothing fly off in a sudden squall.

And how *is* Stella doing these days?

Last we heard, she was still in hospital.

http://www.webcomicsnation.com/shaenongarrity/skinhorse/seri...

There's an interesting article on Bat For Lashes at the Guardian, a popular British singer and songwriter.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/2009/sep/06/bat-for-lashes-m...

I just saw Le Proces de Jeanne d'Arc (1962) (in French with English subtitles that are more or less adequate, as these things go) and was struck that the huge problem for the Holy Church of the time was Jeanne's cross-dressing. Evidently, hearing voices and seeing angels was more-or-less fine, but doing it whilst ‘dressed inappropriately’ was anathema. TMTC,tMTStS.

I see that certain parties are telling us that “ObamaCare” will mandate free sex changes, which seems a very positive step.

http://www.aipnews.com/talk/forums/thread-view.asp?tid=6737&...

I think the world would be much improved if certain among our political class were among the first beneficiaries of this new draft, and was wondering if it were too early to start the nomination process.

Oxumaré

At last, the secret GLBTQ agenda is revealed to the world! Mwahh-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa.....

If the plan succeeds, everyone will soon be female, or a reasonable facsimile.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/scienceandtechnology/science/scie...

Not only that, men are doomed to extinction, eventually...

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/scienceandtechnology/science/scie...

Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.

Puddin'

In most Shamanic traditions, a religious belief system that pre-dates all the mainstream religions, and appears to be almost universal amongst the peoples from whom most modern cultures drew their inspiration, so might be seen as the authentic root from which all later variations of religious belief sprouted, gender expression is seen as a special power bestowed by the higher powers, and some degree of transsexuality and/or transvestism was and is essential to the role of spiritual advisor to the community, because of course the spiritually-limited, those who weren't able to incorporate the full gamut of human traits and aspirations, were necessarily mundane.

The religious outliers that denied such fluidity were primarily the creatures of warlike cultures that forced ‘conversion’ at the point of a sword, unlike most Shamanic cultures, which were relatively peaceful, so the spread of "organised religions" can be overlaid directly on the map of conquest with very few excursions from the general rule and almost total overlap. Because of this link to violence, almost all the ‘mainstream’ — thus bellicose — religions are relentlessly patriarchal, since male warriors formed the basis of almost every historic army.

In the grand scheme of things, ‘Changing Woman’ the dynamic and ever-fruitful alternative to static (often destructive) masculinity, is a useful antidote to the sexist, masculinist, narrative many have grown up with.

Blessed be,

Puddintane

_________

Auferre, trucidare, rapere, falsis nominibus imperium; atque, ubi solitudinem faciunt, pacem appellant.

-- Tacitus

Slaughter, plunder, usurpation of power they call empire; they make a desolation and call it peace.

-- Tacitus

Now here's a sight you'll rarely see at your local natatorium:

Picture Source

Puddin'

P.S. If you follow the Picture Source link, you'll discover that the tiger's name is Odin and he was six years old when the picture was taken. At the source, you can also enlarge the picture and have a better view.

Here's a Mail story about him with more pictures: Mail Article

Here he is on YouTube: Odin Swimming

...of course, is this:

Why Men Make Lousy Advice Columnists

Although details are sketchy, it seems that the good officers of Texas have decided to raid a gay bar and arrest some patrons for public intoxication while said patrons were seated at the bar drinking, and on the anniversary of the Stonewall riots.

http://blogs.dallasobserver.com/unfairpark/2009/06/on_40th_a...

I don't usually frequent bars, but had always imagined that the primary purpose of going to a bar was to drink intoxicating beverages, and that tea is rarely served, but I reckon I must have been wrong, at least in Texas.

Puddin'

I'm sure everyone will be pleased to note that the Virgin Mary seems most likely to have been a feminised man.

I'm sure there's a really great story there as well...

http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/blog/2008/dec/30/virgin-bi...

It turns out that snails, often confused with toads, are also well in advance in many scientific and social science explorations*, are prone to form male/male romantic attachments in which one partner eventually changes sex so they can settle down into normal married life with children.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/blog/2009/jun/17/same-sex-...

Cheers,

Puddin'
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* See The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Grahame
'I wonder,' [Toad] said to himself presently, 'I wonder if this sort of car STARTS easily?'

I would not enter in my list of friends,
Who needlessly sets foot upon a worm.
An inadvertent step may crush the snail
That crawls at evening in the public path,
But he has the humanity, forewarned,
Will tread aside, and let the reptile live.
--- William Cowper

The year's at the spring
And day's at the morn;
Morning's at seven;
The hillside's dew-pearled;
The lark's on the wing;
The snail's on the thorn;
God's in his heaven --
All's right with the world!
--- Robert Browning
(I had to add a quote from Browning,
just because many don't realise that
snails weighed heavily in his notion
of the proper order.)

Before the British arrived upon the scene, there was only Winter, as detailed in the tiny slice of British history Churchill missed, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe.

In this holy text, we see that cold, bitchy Winter is personified by femininity, with all the general nastiness this entails, until conquered by The High King, who alone has the right to rule because of his sacred masculinity, and the winter of our discontent is finally made glorious summer by the son of Man, who is the natural ruler of the entire world because he is a British male, even though apparently a mere child, and all the other races (pardon, talking animals) his natural inferiors. Noblesse oblige.

It's quite touching, when one thinks about it...

Cheers,

Puddin'

...you see something like this on your daily commute.