Good grief, I was thinking out loud as I looked at myself. Cat was by my side telling me I looked good, I was thinking this joke had gone a good bit further and far deeper than I expected.
It was our second year summer break, and 8 of us had rented a house in Blackpool for a fortnight. The idea was to just chill out and have some fun, before going on to summer jobs, home or whatever. A problem arose when we arrived and realised that the house had 4 double rooms, and there were 3 girls and 5 men making the 8. Being well prepared, we had all brought cases of wine or beer, so the first thing we did was to have drink as we brought our bags in, then we discussed the room allocation. Two girls siad they would share, but no two men fancied sharing a bed, and there was only one room with twin beds so we spent ages trying to persaude the men to share beds. Then for what reason I don't know what, I suggested we were all good friends and liberally minded, why don't we share with the opposite sex, this got a reserved nod, non of us had strong relationships, if anything we all tended towards promiscuity as a way of life. The men liked the idea, the girls wanted to select who they had to sleep with. Then Carl noticed that there were only 3 girls so that meant 2 men would be sharing. It was Cat who offered the solution, I become one of them.
There was a good laugh and a few more beers opened, and someone offered me a glass of wine instead of beer. I tried the 'You are joking' line, but over half were in favour of seeing me going over to the other side. I was the smallest, least manly, most delicate, and a few other things that I don't wish to repeat, but no matter how much I squirmed the fun had started and soon everyone wanted to see me as a girl.
Cat, Dawn and Steph took me to one of the bedrooms, first they discussed what I was going to wear and which of them was going to do what. Cat was in charge of hair, Steph clothes, and Dawn make up. I was showered, shaved all over, shampooed, conditioned, then allowed to dry myself, when I asked if anything was necessary they just put me down with 'Off course it is'
My hair was a mop on top of my head that I was always sweeping off my face, so while Cat dried and used her heated tongues on my hair, Dawn was combining their make up kits to create a pretty face on my facial features. When they were done Steph produced my outfit, a bra and knicker set, a sheer pink top, denim mini, footless tights and after some looking a pair of heeled sandals. It was now I said 'Good grief' I surprised myself at realising how feminine I looked, if I could stand on the shoes I would have really convinced myself.
The next stage in the evenings fun was to be presented to the rest of my friends, with a bit of a fanfare, the girls lead me into the main room and introduced me as Maria. They all said welcome and offered me more wine, then left to collect a take away as we were getting hungry. I stayed with the girls and found plates and cutlery, I was allowed to remove my shoes if I promised to walk on my toes and wiggle my bum, 'Like this' I said 'Bit more hips' they suggested and I was mincing around elbows in wrists out and feeling like a fool, but being told I was looking great.
Over the food we now discussed the sleeping arrangements, the result was two cups, one with 4 girls names, one with 4 boys names, and they were picked out randomly. Cat was first and got Pete, Steph got Paul, then it went quiet when the slip with Maria written on it came out, two men left, which would get me? Carl's name came out. He made a big show of taking my hand and getting me sit on his lap, even putting a hand around my waist. The other couples made no great show of affection, that was until later when the various sounds of sex could be heard in the building, all except my room. Carl had played the part downstairs, but once alone he backed off treating me like a man again. I did give him a peck on the cheek and told him it would be his turn tomorrow night with a real girl. And with that lay on either side of the bed and hoped neither of us touched each other.
The morning was a strange one, I had make up smeared about my face and my hair felt odd presumably from the stuff the girls had put on it the night before. I showered but soap did not seem to have a great effect on the redness of my lips or the dark colour around my eyes. I went to see what we had for breakfast and find out if they had something to clean me up properly.
Carl was already being ribbed about how had his night been with Maria, he was blushing and stumbling over his replies which made the game even more fun, but I was in my Mark clothes so the temptation to tease him with a kiss and tell lies about his performance would not be as much fun. But the girls did tease me, about Carl and about why I was in jeans and a sweat top. I clearly dissappionted them, I had thought it was just a one night bit of fun. I guess it was my reaction that made them bait me more, I fidgetted and blushed, they told me how good I had looked and that I had clearly had fun with Carl at least before everyone had gone to bed, so why not continue. I put up my defenses, basically saying no, then went of for a walk in what could be described as a sulk.
I had what turned out to be a nice refreshing walk along the seafront, found a nice bar and enjoyed just looking out at the sea. I thought about my situation in the house and amongst my friends, and considered how I should react if they wanted me to play at being the fourth girl again. I had plenty of time as it was late afternoon when I got back. Everyone else was there and the beer was out already, soon I was drinking wine and having it explained to me that they had discovered one of the gay bars, The Flying Handbag, and that would be our venue for the evening, and that they had already drawn for partners and moved bags about, I was with Paul. He seemed fine with the set up and added to the calls for me to go with the girls and refind Maria.
With a bottle of wine, I spent the next few hours listening more than being involved in their chat about what they should wear, but more startling was their talk about how the men performed, they were far more crude than I expected, until then I had only thought it was men that bragged about their activities. I was so wrong, but did learn an awful lot about how to please a woman. After the chat came the serious work of getting ready, all three had decided on a clubby look, they were in body clinging dresses and high heels, and looked gorgeuos, it was pointed out that I had a manly bump up front so tight clothing was not an option, and so I was dressed in the sheer pink top, with a black bra underneath, and the denim mini, but no leggings, this time they rubbed tanning lotion into my legs, as well as each others so we did not need tights. My nails, all twenty of them were painted pink, and my face was painted in a similiar style to the others, the going out look they called it, I just had it down as making them look great, on me not bad. My hair as well as theirs was restyled into rather fantastic shapes. Cat had two pony tails sprouting from her head that were fluffed out and spiked, Steph who had long hair, coiled it up on to her head leaving tendrils all round her face. Dawn had dyed her hair and now a rich red colour, she added gell to make her hair stand out with loads of extra body. Mine was wrapped in the curling tongues until my head was a mass of random curls except for the fringe which was gelled in place so it swept across my right eye and tucked behind my ear. The hardest part was shoes for me, my feet were a bit bigger than Cat who had the largest, so I had one chioce of heels with an ankle strap that adjusted for the extra length, the other thing I noticed was that my coloured toes looked very noticable poking out of the open end, which for some reason made me feel quite feminine.
The boys had been watching football on the TV and took 5 minutes to get ready, but before he left Paul told me I looked great and then gave me a kiss. I had prepared myself on my walk for the possibility of getting dressed as Maria again, and the chance that I might have to behave like a girl towards whoever I was paired with, but this kiss threw me. Paul returned changed and smelling of after shave, then taking my hand lead me to the kitchen, 'You look better than last night,' he started 'and you know what Maria I think we could have some fun tonight' he kissed my cheek, and I quickly thought, I could be a prude and not let him get near me, or I could just play the part and loose myself in Maria. It took seconds but seemed like minutes before I answered 'ok' and kissed him on the lips. When we parted he said 'Great' and put a hand on my arse and squeezed it, making me jump and swipe for his hand which he caught as we entered the main room, looking like we were holding hands. We were ready to have some fun.
The evening ended up being great fun, a few scary moments such as walking out the house thinking everyone must be staring at me, wobbling on the heels and a stranger taking a double look when I spoke. But mostly I saw myself as Mark having fun dressed up with friends having a laugh, though there was always that contact with Paul, I used his arm to steady myself, we sat together in the bar, when the others did some cuddling or dancing he would suggest we do the same. My position in the group was different as well, I was no longer one of the lads, and would be more in the girl group if there was a split, such as going for a pee, or getting up for a girls dance, I was even invited along when the 3 girls got up to go.
No the big, and new turn came when we got back in the early hours, after a coffee, we all split up into our seperate sleeping arrangements. Steph had made sure I knew more of what to do before going to sleep, cleansing etc, but she also lent me a short nightie. I had not made my mind up whether I would sleep in it, but once I was alone with Paul he gave me a real kiss, 'wow' I thought as I did not pull away, maybe I had drunk more than I thought, then he asked if I was up for new experiences, I replied 'usually' 'in that case, shall we see how this situation works' 'uh?' 'as in, me man, you good looking girl' 'oh, I see' and I put my arms around his neck and pulled myself towards him.
That night was a revelation to me, Paul spotted the nightie and suggested I wear it over my bra and knickers. Once in bed and close I felt his erection pressing on me, and felt my own strengthening in the panties. This was such a turn on. By the time we gave up and slept, I had wanked him off, he had done the same to me, but most unexpected was that I sucked him off. Mainly because it is something I like girls to do to me and was very much feeling in the girl role at the time.
Monday morning rolled around, Paul was awake and looking at me when I woke. 'Did you enjoy last night?' still a bit asleep 'the bar was fun, yes' 'No I mean later' 'Oh as in ............' 'Yes' 'Did you?' 'You are one hot girl you know' 'oh' was all I could manage and made for the toilet.
I had to wait for Cat coming out, still in the nightie she looked me up and down 'Good night?' 'Think so' 'Well Maria we had better get you somethings of your own, we can't have you borrowing our stuff all the time' 'What' I replied 'If you are going to be Maria, then you need some clothes of your own' 'Is that necessary?....I thought it was just a bit of fun' unfortunately Paul came out of the room and joined in 'Fun? definitely, eh Maria' then slide his had around my waist and kissed me. I blushed deeply and went to relieve himself in the toilet.
I entered the kitchen some time later wearing a sweat top and the denim skirt, because no matter how hard I looked my own case seemed to be missing and had to borrow one of Paul's much larger tops and the denim skirt to hide my modesty, which was not really that necessary as the top came well below my hips. As Paul pointed out a particularly hot look, a woman in a loose mans top. This hunting meant that I had missed an interesting and for me important conversation, the other seven had discussed if I should stay as Maria for the duration of the holiday, or be allowed my case back. The vote was unanimous, though Carl, I learnt later was slow to be included. Then at Dawn's suggestion everyone contributed £20 so Maria could get some clothes of her own, this was less enthusiastically welcomed but eventually she got each member to pay up.
As I took in the results of their discussions, I did consider complaining and being angry, but I remembered what conclusion I had come to on my walk the day before, to go with what seemed fun, and the night with Paul had been a rather novel and interesting experience, so I asked just one question 'Do I have any choice?'. There was not a totally committed 'no' from all of them but enough to allow me to shrug and say 'In that case, what do I need?'
Dawn lead me away and told me I would have to start learning how to do my hair and make up myself, but for today she would style my hair and help with make up, Steph was going to lend me a knee length skirt, a cotton blouse and a jacket so I could go to the shops. That thought brought home that this dressing was not going to be just evenings mucking about in bars, but the duller and possibly more scary daytime stuff, like going to shops and really hoping no one took me for a man in drag.
It was a scary day, the three girls escorted me around the cheaper stores, buying tops, skirts, a jacket, 3 pairs of shoes, a selection of underwear, a red nightie and a pile of make up. I had little input into the chioces but trusted them not to pick anything which would make me look ridiculous. Then once back at the house I had a chance to try everything on, and have it critized by the three girls. Essentially what I had was two plainish skirts, three different tops, two going out sparkly tops and a couple of more revealing skirts as well as a pair of shorts I could wear anytime they said.
That evening dressed in a gold vest top and cream layered skirt, stood on top of some 3" heels I was partnered with Pete, who had decided they were going to visit a nearby pub, get some chips and return for a football match that was showing that evening. This order followed pretty much to plan, except only Cat of the girls stayed to watch the football, Dawn and Steph taking Maria into the kitchen to drink some wine and discuss boys. It was felt that Pete was the best, he looked good, respected their feelings and was good in bed. The others were better than Pete at something, but overall though not top scorer he was consistent at most things. I did wonder what the bedroom might hold later with that sort of recommendation. The football ended and a film followed, during which several drifted of to bed, either alone or as couples. Pete had got me to sit beside him and was doing some intimate touching which I responded to positively, then when I said it was a dull film and was going to bed he followed upstairs.
He caught me as we got to the top of the stairs, 'Paul tells me I could be in for an interesting night' 'Did he indeed' 'He said you had fun last night' 'Did he?' there was a pause while I turned to look at Pete and consider what Paul might have said, then stated 'We were experimenting.' 'Well I am up for some experiments as long as they are enjoyable' I then lent over to Pete and kissed him. He responded well and lead him into our room for the night. 'First experiment. How was it?' I asked 'Fine, what is the second?' In no time at all we were side by side on the bed kissing and fondling each other and generally getting ourselves aroused. 'Experiment number 2' I said as my hand went inside Pete's trousers and cupped his erection. 'Fine with that?' 'Yes' came the muffled reply as he brought himself under control. A little more massaging and I considered what to do next, kneeling above him, Pete's trousers became undone and I slid my lips over the erection infront of me. For the first time I felt like it was a truly female role I was playing and had no desire to use the erection in the knickers like a man would. I felt like a she as I bobbed up and down on the shaft, until Pete arched his back and exploded into my mouth. This felt so satisfying to me and I licked the retreating flesh making sure all the taste was gone. We lay alongside each other for a while, then I had to get up to clean my face and get ready for bed, coming back in the red nightie, 'My god, you are so sexy, bet you dont even realise it do you'. Pete pulled me into the bed and kissed some more. I tasted cum three times that night, leaving Pete sore and exhausted, but happy.
Tuesday morning and I needed no votes to persaude me to stay in female character. On reflection as I had lain next to Pete, the prospect of not seeing what else this role had to offer was slipping down the priorities. I wanted to try on a different skirt and top, have a go at doing the hair and make up, and then later see how Matt shaped up in the manhood stakes. Dawn helped with the make up, teaching how the different cosmetics work to create the face you want, then taught her student what the difference detween gel and mousse is and what curling tongues can do to create a style.
Later we 4 girls went down onto the beach and sat about gossipping, eating the food we had picked up on the way there, and enjoying the summer sun. I had a female moment when we were walking along the sea front and noticed the long sundress Cat was wearing and liked the way it swirled around her legs, there was nothing that new in thinking a girl is attractive, what was new was the thought for me, of how would I look in something like that.
Come five o'clock everyone was back at the house and there was no partner ballot that evening, everyone only had one person they had not partnered and I knew mine would be Matt. We had discussed earlier what we fancied doing that evening, the rest of the boys wanted to watch a boxing match on TV, but niether Matt or myself liked the idea, so Matt suggested going to the gay bar again, I felt this was a pretty safe option and dressed for the evening, mini puffball skirt and a lycra crop top, darker eye shadow and deeper lip colour and I was set for her first 'date'.
The walk on the 3" heels was not a fast one, but Matt did not seem to mind and would let me hold his arm for support. Once there and comfortably sat down with a drink, we chatted, clearly Pete had mentioned the experiments and Matt made it obvious from the places he put his hands that he was up for some experimenting. We danced to a few tunes and enjoyed the closeness of some moves. Then as I needed to pee I left him, while he went to get a drink. This would be a first, the ladies on my own, not with the others. After doing my business and a quick check in the mirror to ensure the face was still good, another girl struck up a conversation, at first the deeper than expected vioce did not register with me, 'You look good girl, and that man is divine, where did you catch him?' I was a little off gaurd, men's loos dont do chat like this 'He's a friend' I answered. 'Not seen you in here before, new round here?' then I twigged that this was another cross dresser, 'On holiday and it is my second time in here, good isn't it' the new friend gave me a good up and down look 'There are a few of us over in the corner, come over and say hello, and bring your hunk' Five minutes later me and Matt are chatting with four other TVs and surprisingly Matt was quite relaxed about it. It was getting late when they left to get a taxi back, but not before Cheryl had written a mobile number down for me.
Matt had played the boyfriend part very well, his hands had been all over me, I especially liked it when he stood behind me and put a hand firmly on my arse and squeezed a cheek, thank goodness for two pairs of knickers restraining my reaction. When we got in we went straight to our room for the night and continued the kissing we had started earlier, then as Matt undressed and his appreciation of my attentions stood out in front of him, I fell before him and used my mouth to encourage him further, but he stopped me before he came. 'I would like to suggest I treat you as a woman, lie down, take off your panties and let me see if I can make you happy' He massaged some gel into my hole then slipped a condom over his pole, then took up the passion where we had left off. Soon he was entering a quite tight hole, and telling me to relax, which I was trying very hard too. Eventually he was inside me and starting to ride in and out, going deeper every stroke. Slowly I relaxed and Matt could move easily, then it happened I tensed and let out a sound of delight, 'Good?' 'yes, do it again', so he did until he thought he could last no longer, and I arched my back and panted as I came, clinging onto Matt. Lying beside each other I cuddled up close, 'That was great, where did you learn that?' Matt paused a while before answering 'I once had a friend and we tried out all sorts of stuff as teenagers learning about hormones.' 'Well I am glad you did, that was so fantastic.......I had better get myself ready for bed, see you in a bit'
Wednesday morning was a shock to me, first was how sore my arse now was, and how everyone looked at me when I went into the kitchen to get something to eat. Cat broke the silence, 'Well you lost it then?' 'what' I replied 'your cherry' Cat answered. The blush was noticable but I denied again 'what?' there was a collective tittering, Carl joined in, 'We could hear you, and you are walking very gingerly this morning, which sort of confirms what we suspected' I took a coffee and walked out not wishing to get into such talk so early in the day.
As a distraction I offered to go with Dawn to pick up some groceries for the day, in just a plain skirt and top I felt girlie but dull. I mentioned this to Dawn who commented how some girls like to be ultra feminine while at the other end of the spectrum are the almost boy looking t shirt and jeans girls, and it did not depend on how pretty the girl was rather how the girl felt that made the difference. I expressed the idea that maybe as a girl I was more to the feminine end of the spectrum, Dawn remembered how the long sundress had been commented on the day before and suggested they go and buy her something long and flowing. Two hours later they arrived back with the food and a dress that had a full bodice and from below the bust line had acres of soft material flowing down to an uneven hemline somewhere near the floor. I loved the feel of it, but more importantly I had chosen it, it was mine and defined something of the girl in me, not what others thought the girl might be.
Over lunch there was talk about bedroom arrangements now everyone had shared with everyone else. A couple did not want to do the random again, maybe they had had a bad night with someone and wished to aviod a snorer, who knows. This discussion lead to a complicated system where everyone put down their prefered partner as well as their second and third, then Pete would go away and work out if he could get everyone with their first or second chioces. No one knowing if they had been first chioce or not. I put down Matt as first chioce, and Paul as second, Pete as third. Then went of to read a book I had brought to read.
Dawn and me cooked a big stew for the evening and as everyone sat down, Pete produced his results. I had got Paul who came and sat beside me. He was obviously up for a good night as he took me for a walk along the beach later, then a drink, followed by a long session in bed. I was thankful I had been prepared and had bought gel and condoms during the shopping trip. Maybe because Paul was not the first, or he was still unsure of how to make love to a woman who did not have a conventional pussy, but it did not have the fireworks of the night before. It was good and reconfirmed that I liked being the woman, but Matt was still the best.
Next day I had a call from Cheryl, inviting her to meet for lunch at a cafe. In my long dress I kept the appiontment with a now modestly dressed Cheryl, who looked like any other woman if a little tall, unlike the tart she had appeared to be the other night. We chatted about what we were, how we came to be cross dressers, Cheryl intrigued that I was doing it to even up numbers in the group. Then we both went back to Cheryl's house some way from the front. We had talked of styles and how to disguise the male give aways when dressing, but as it was all new to me, Cheryl offered to show her what she meant in a practical way.
Once a cup of tea had been organised, Cheryl showed me the tricks to her figure, as she undressed the corset was obviously pulling the waist in, but the realistic bust and neat crutch took a bit more explaining. I was fascinated as I saw the naked Cheryl emerge with hidden cock and balls below, and a false chest above. Seeing how I was enthralled by this, Cheryl who enjoyed the flattery she was recieving, as well as the oppurtunity to show off, offered to give me a good naked look. An hour later I walked out of the house with a realistic bounce to my chest, due to me now having C cup falsies glued there, and tape restrianing a flat crutch that did not matter in the dress I was wearing but felt sure would enhance anything a little tighter. The girls noticed as soon as I walked into the house, the more prominent chest was clear beneath my dress. I was immediately taken into a bedroom and asked to reveal my changes, for some reason I went all coy about being naked when a few days ago I happily stood in front of them while they transformed me into Maria. I did not go past underwear but they all told me I should try something tight fitting later.
About eight, the four of us were ready and went to collect our respective partners, I had got a good reaction from the girls, but the boys just stared at me. The tight skirt revealed nothing and the sparkly vest top revealed everything, I went over to Paul put a finger under his chin and made a joke about shutting his mouth, while the others reminded theirs that they were supposed to be with them. We had a good night out, I felt most at ease in the gay bar, so that is where we ended up. I would even say I was getting used to heels as I managed to dance in them, but did hang onto Paul's arm on the walk back. Once in the bedroom he helped me underdress and was shocked that I maintianed the figure in bra and pants, he was so excited his erection was rock hard without help and just went inside me without any warm up routine. I did get some tingles before he came, but nowhere near as good as I wanted. Later when I was cleaned up and ready for bed, I explianed to him that I was not going to be any easy lay, I wanted my moment as well. If he wanted me to satisfy his needs he would have to fulfill mine. He promised to make me come next time, maybe the fact that I was sucking his cock at the time had some bearing on the answer but I had made my point.
We were half way through the first week and I was totally taken with whole new experience, and just wanted more. I dressed in a tight top and the shorts that day. I went for a bus ride with Paul to Fleetwood, wandered around the shops, then walked barefoot along the sand to meet the others. As we walked I tried to explian how I was feeling and expressed my desire to experience as much of this femme life as possible in the next week and a half. I also tried to understand how I was enjoying gay sex, liked looking at boys and being Paul's partner, but had never before considered myself gay at all. Paul just kept it simple, I looked like a hot girl, so he would treat me as one. That night he was as good as his promise and made me pant before I tensed and arched into his thrusts. My last words were thank you, before I fell asleep exhausted.
On Thursday things got a little tense around the house, Matt and Steph who had been sharing made it clear they wanted a change and the others fell in with the idea of have a change around, the outcome of this was that I ended up with Matt, who in his preferences this time had put me top. So after a shuffle around of clothing, I was sharing with Matt and quickly asked for a little passion which I willingly complied with, soon I had my skirt around my waist and his knob inside me making me want him more. We did venture out to eat and get a drink, but by the time I finally put on my nightie to sleep in, he had been inside three times and made me come every time. This only reinforced my desire to live out the holiday as Maria and make the most of this short time.
Friday gave me an oppurtunity to live out a new part of the life I was creating. Cheryl called and asked if I was free at the weekend, of course I was, I was on holiday. Well she had a costume for a gay pride float and the girl who should have been wearing it was ill so would I fill in for her, I did try to resist and thought of a few negatives like I was still unsure of myself, but she just said nonsense, and I should be at her house for seven for a fitting. I explianed to Matt where I was going and told him I would be looking forward to satisfying our needs later which seemed to make him happy. Any way I turned up at Cheryl's in a loose top and puff skirt. I was treated to kisses all round and told to make myself at home, the drinks were in the kitchen. I had two shorts before I had chance to take stock and take a soft drink. My costume was a spanish looking outfit, bolero jacket with puffy sleeves, and a wrap around skirt that did not quite wrap all the way round, leaving my bikini briefs on show, I objected to being so exposed in public, but then I got a look at the others, Cheryl was in a similar outfit but with less of it, Julie was in a gold swimsuit, and Kay was in a body fitting black catsuit that made her look quite severe, but at least she was not going to be showing her knickers. It had been explianed that it was to raise funds for AIDS care, and found myself agreeing to meet them the next day. I also found out that CDs are quite varied sexually. Kay's wife came by later to pick her up, and Julie made a pass at me asking if I fancied going out after then round to her place, the implied sex was easy to spot. I was a little confused that another man in a dress could fancy me and told her I needed to get back, but not before she had made it quite clear I was her type as she kissed me very passionately before I left. I was ready for Matt when I got back and I was not dissappionted with his attentions.
The next day I meet up with the women as they decorated the truck they were using as a float, Matt came along to give a helping hand along with a few very well toned men who made it clear Matt could join them anytime, but I was just a girl. With an hour to go I found myself in a camper van changing into my costume and doing my make up in a more dramatic stage style, Kay produced some platform heels for me to wear, they looked frightening but when I stood still I realised the heel - platform hieght was not that great and soon gained the confidence to walk in them. Matt loved the look, and as we kissed slid a hand over my exposed bikini knickers, which just made me more uncomfortable as the tape fought with my penis.
To say I had a fantastic time parading around, letting holiday makers take photos with me, teasing men who clearly knew we were men, yet still reacting well to our our flirting, and being given drinks along the way until I had no idea how much I had drunk just that I was very happy with the world. The afternoon left me with a great feeling and buzzing from this new found experience, I was really enjoying dressing up as a woman, and behaving as one even in a very public place like a carnival. We came to the show ground where the trucks parked up and we got a rest, Kay's wife had made us some food to eat and four outragouesly dressed men sat around and ate quite understated sandwiches and drank coffee from a flask, before we let the judges assess our float before we dismantled it. I felt a bit deflated to see it all go and as the truck drove off I did wonder what next. We were still all in our costumes and with Kay in her dominatrix outfit and us looking like drag queens, she took on the role of her outfit and told us we were going out, when I asked if I could go and change she went all severe and told me I looked great, why waste it, then looked at the three of us, and she started telling us we were her sissys to do with as she pleased, any displeasure would be punished and we were to follow her instructions without question. I was getting worried as I had heard about domination games and did not fancy it, then Cheryl started laughing followed by Kay and Julie, I missed the joke as it was at my expense, but apperently my face was a picture. We did go back into town still dressed, just to see what reaction we would get from the places we visited. Matt joined us and got sucked into the general high spirits of playing to the crowd as we paraded around. Eventually tired and drunk I made it to bed and for the first time in days went to sleep without sex.
The Sunday was a bit of an anticlimax after the fun of Saturday. I was quizzed about the parade by the girls and Matt obliged with showing his pictures on his camera. Me in costume, me on the float, me flirting with the crowd, Kay trying to look dominating, Matt kissing me. All had some story to them and the girls loved the idea of me, the quiet lad being so extrovert in my new persona, all I could do was smile and make no comment as I knew there was some truth in what they were saying.
Later we went out as a group, I modestly wore trousers and a feminine top. All we did was walk along the front, sit on the sand and chat. The significant part for me was that I was either in the girls group or with with Matt, I was not one of the lads anymore. In a week I had shifted my own self image to that of a girl and was behaving as one more and more. In one conversation the girls asked me what I would do with the remaining week. I was certainly going to stay as a girl but beyond that I did not have much idea of what I could do. So as the boys went of the play in the water they came up with a plan let me experience some of the more feminine things involved in being a girl, then we walked back through the shops to pick up some vital products before heading to the house and my new experiences.
First off they made me washed my hair and then without telling me what colour it was they dyed my hair, while that was working a lump of ice and a needle had my ears peirced and hoops inserted. The hair was then rinsed and finished, my shock when I saw I was now blonde with what to me looked gigantic 2" hoops left me wondering if I was right to want more girlie experiences, but before I could air any concerns they were plucking more eye brow hairs out. We decided that enough had been done for a day, but that I could be finished off properly Monday morning.
Matt made me feel better by telling me how great the new hair colour looked, and asked if I was planning anything else, I answered truthfully that I was not entirely sure as he lifted my arse and pushed his dick inside me until I moaned with pleasure and pumped his semen into me.
The next morning once we were all up and functioning I was told the next stage of my femininisation would happen. First up was having long nails glued to my fingers and painted a rich pink colour, then I was given what they called a master class in make up, which was very informative as they shared tips on how to do things, then at the end before my lips were made up a clear liquid was brushed on them which made them sting, when I asked what it was Cat would only say wait and see. I had no chioce and watched as my lips swelled from their normal thin line to much a fuller mouth, then coloured I knew I had much sexier lips. But they were not finished with me, I was taken to a hair salon much against my wishes, firstly because it would be expensive, then because I might be found out, then because I did not want a new style. They just railroaded me into the shop, paid for me, had a word with the stylist, then sat and waited. It was like a torture being watched by them, and being under such scrutiny by the the staff. But in the end my blonde hair was striaghtened and curled under my chin, giving it a very nice look. The girls all approved of the new look and told me one last thing that we had to do was shop. I was not given much chioce once again I was taken rather than went. By mid afternoon I was all kitted out. A black slip with a sheer black over dress, niether barely covering my black thong, and on my feet they had found what were termed fuck me heels, I just knew they were high and thin. Early evening I was given a final once over in Cat's room before Matt was told they had a treat for him, at which point I was paraded out infront of him and the other three lads. I felt so embarrassed to be there on show, rather like a prize animal being offered up to be judged. Matt came out with a 'Fuck me' comment which got the response that, that was not the idea, rather he fucks me and he had better go and smarten up and take me out somewhere special so I could get the full benefit of looking so great. Then one by one the other girls came into the main room all dressed up and telling their partners that they were not being left out. Soon four very sexy women were being escorted by four ok lads to a bar, then a club and finally to bed where their hours of sexual frustration were released.
The Tuesday morning was largely missed due to hangovers and tiredness, but as Matt and myself came to life I realised how much I liked the feel of my silk nightie and the soreness between my legs reminding me of past pleasures, so when Matt said 'Penny for your thoughts' I told how much I liked being his girlfriend, how it was not planned, or even considered before we came but I was now a committed girl who only had a week left before I had to go back to being a lad and start my summer job packing boxes in a warehouse. Matt's response was encouraging if a little selfish, he suggested I make the most of the week, be as girlie as possible and for his part he would treat me as his woman, and when I questioned if that included screwing me, he just said of course it did, and being girlie in his eyes was to be sexy. When I suggested he would like me to flaunt myself all the time, short skirts, high heels etc, he only said 'That would be nice'. I let me hands explore his body while this conversation ran its course, finishing up with an erection in my hand, which I rather too willingly ducked under the sheets to bring to a climax with my mouth. When I came back up I told him 'Treat me well and I shall make sure that dick is sore by the time we leave' he turned to smile at me 'That could be a challenge, but one I will enjoy taking on. Now then my lovely chick, I think a mini skirt this morning and the see through top if you don't mind'
The week rather continued in this vain, I would dress as he asked, which was usually in a tarty fashion, and I looked forward to getting his prick to touch that button inside my hole which made me tense and shudder until my body erupted. I also lost any sense of decorum, shamlessly flaunting myself infront of him encouraging him to get randy even in the morning in front of our friends who later told me that they were growing sick of my exhibitions, but at the time I did not care.
I managed a couple of nights out with Cheryl and her friends, and without Matt realised that I could have quite a selection of interested parties who would like to be entertained by a person such as myself, I was slowly recognising how many different oppurtunities could be available if I ever fancied to live a wilder sort of lifestyle. But for then I chose to stick with Matt as it was proving to be great fun.
That was until Saturday, we had to be out for midday and this meant I would have to be going home as my parents would expect me to be, their son. Friday saw us all out having a good time in the bars, then back in our beds entertaining our partners until the early hours if the sounds of sexual activity was anything to go by, for Matt that meant he penetrated me twice and I finished him off with a final blow, before he gave me his leaving present, a dildo, which he inserted and switched on so I could continue my pleasures and remember him when he was not around to service me. I lasted one orgasm before I removed it and had to accept I needed sleep.
The morning was not just about packing and tidying, for me it meant also removing all the femininization bits. I was sad to see my body regain it's boy shape, and the genitals reappear, then the nails came off, but even with a good shower and plenty of make up removal I was unable to do anything about my hair, the girls suggested I dye it back to my natural colour and mybe get it cut, I could let the ear piercings heal, but probably because I wanted to hang onto the echos of the holiday I replaced the hoops with small studs and did nothing to my hair letting fate decide what would happen to it when I judged the response from home. As for the clothes I put them at the bottom of my bag so it was not to obvious if I needed to get something out.
The parting at the station as we seperated either in cars or onto a trian for me was awkward, I was now a bloke the same as Matt and that meant our view of each other had somehow changed, I managed to hug the girls but without the familiarity of the past days. Then as I finally said good bye on the platform to Cat when my train was due to leave I felt a deep sadness at what I was leaving behind and would possibly never experience again. I had a couple of hours to watch the scenery go past and I felt my holiday being left behind, but that was replaced by a sense of forboding as the train get ever closer to my home town and the inevitable meeting with my mother at the local station as she had promised to collect me and my luggage, but what would she make of the blonde neat hair I now wore, and with no option of calling anywhere on route to change it, I could only sit and worry about the possible outcomes...............................................................
What will happen to Mark when he gets home, what will his mother say, what will happen when he meets up with his friends when the new term starts. I leave this open, maybe some one would like to write a part 2 or make suggestions for a continuation.
Lauran (keep smiling)
I carried my bags along the platform, I could see her waiting beyond the barriers but she kept looking at the other travelers clearly not spotting me. I was nearly stood infront of her before I saw any recognition, then it was a mixture of her usual pleased smile and a questioning look. I put my bags down and we hugged as usual, she said the usual greetings but as we stood close after the hugs her hand went to my hair and she ran her fingers through the side, 'This is a surprise, quite a bold statement' then she saw the pierced ear lobe 'And those are pretty' I was starting to blush but knew I had to just take whatever was coming, I was there and with no way of going back in time to change things I was going to find out how she reacted to me, the only thing I could keep to myself was the history of why I had done these things. She continued 'I am taking it that you had an interesting time with your friends?' We picked up the bags and started to move towards the car park, but she stopped as we passed a coffee shop. I had said nothing until then 'Let's have a coffee before we drive home' I understood this as we need a chat as we never did this detour as she considered station coffee a rip off and tasteless.
'So Mark, you are very quiet, I can see you had some new experiences, care to tell me about them'. Even though I had spent hours thinking about this conversation, now it had started I was nearly panicking in my head, not sure what to say, lie, tell the whole truth or something in between. I stared at my steaming coffee and mumbled 'It was just some fun with the girls really, they wanted to see how I looked and I went along with it' her hand came over and touched mine 'The hair does look nice, takes a little getting used too but I like it, do you like it?' I looked up into her eyes 'Yes but I am not sure I should keep it, a bit shocking and girlie isn't it' 'Perhaps it is but it suits you, maybe we could get you some plainer studs but I do like the hair' after a minute I asked 'I was thinking of getting it dyed back to my natural colour and having a trim' she came back immediately with 'Why, you are young and if you don't do these things while you are less restricted you never will, once you have a job and have to conform to dress codes such fun with how you look will be missed. No if you like it then you keep it and don't mind what others think.' We sat and drank our coffee, she filled me in on home gossip, but besides very sketchy details I hardly gave any information about my time in Blackpool. But just as we were finishing she came out with 'Those hoops are very pretty, not at all what a boy would choose, and the hair has been cut well and coloured properly, those girls must have been having a great time making you look this good, I am guessing it was not a drunken dare.' I was blushing again as I agreed that they were having fun, but did let her know I had been a willing partner in the fun, I had allowed them to do these things to me. 'That is interesting, I would have thought you might have been under some pressure to let them carry out the styling in particular, but if you say not then you clearly must like the idea of looking like this as well as the reality'. Sometimes I do wish my mother was not a solicitor as she can put things into words in such a way as to make me squirm. This time she had voiced how I had got my feminine hairstyle willingly, she made it sound almost as though it was my chioce, which when considered coldly it was, I could have said no at any point or left the house, I did not have to end up looking like this. So I asked 'What do you think dad will say? I can get it changed easily' she was looking into my eyes when she answered 'We can stop somewhere on the way home if you must, but this is part of you, your personal expression of who you are. Your dad might say something, but just remind of those student photos of him in his hippy kaftans and long hair. Besides I like a prettier Mark, for some reason it suits you in a way that your past style has always made me think you were just following your groups style without thinking, this has shown some thought, and quite a lot of courage. Yes I approve. Come Mark lats get home.' And that was it she had concluded her discussion on the subject.
Once home I unpacked and carefully hid my Marie items, I replied to a text from Matt who asking how things had gone, I answered, OK. Mother even lent me a pair of small gold studs which proved tricky to get in as the holes had not healed completely. My next challenge was when father came home, I kept that image of him as a student in my mind as he walked in wearing his pin stripe suit. 'Good hoilday son?' 'Yes thank you' and that seemed to be it, he went through his coming home routine of kissing mother, undressing to his shirt and trousers, getting a scotch, then looking at the post. A short while later we were eating our family meal when out of the blue he asked 'Is that it then?' I was unsure what he meant or even if he was talking to me, 'Do you have any other fashions you are going to try out, or is this it?' he was looking directly at me, I just said 'Sorry?' he continued 'Well are you going to go for reds or greens, have a mohican, tattoo yourself, pierce your nose etc?' I was understanding now 'Oh no this was it, I don't think I shall be trying out anything too extreme' he smiled at me 'So you are happy with your feminine style? Good, it suits you though I was unsure when your mother told me on the phone, but now I see it in the flesh as it were, I can see how it does work well'
That had gone far better than I had ever hoped for, no serious objections from my parents, even positive acceptance it appeared if being told I suited a feminine style was positive. The next day I had to start work at the warehouse so covered my hair with a beannie hat and spent my day working harder than I have ever done in my life. I managed two days and then my world changed. We had our evening meal together and I don't know what I ate or drank, but I was relaxed enough when getting ready for bed to catch a glimpse of my nightie and decide to wear it that night. The big event happened in the early hours, I woke feeling really sick and just had time to make it to a toilet and throw up, as I knelt there in the post sick weakness my mother, as she had done since I was child, came in to make sure I was alright. She wrapped me in a dressing gown and gave me a glass of water, before making sure I was over the worst and taking me back to bed and making sure I was comfortable.
In the morning I woke feeling terrible, father had looked in on his way to work and made some remark about hoping I felt better soon, then mother came in to see if I was wanting any breakfast. I was alert enough to keep the duvet pulled up, but also had to acknowledge that she must have seen my nightie in the night. She rang work and told them I was sick, then brought me some toast. Soon I was feeling better and it was decided I had eaten something which had disagreed with me and now my body had got rid of it I would soon be up and about.
When she came in later with a drink she brooched the subject of my nightwear. 'I think you need to explain why you were wearing a nightie last night' the truth was I could not think of a good excuse 'I can't explain it really, I got it while I was on holiday and I like wearing it. That is about it.' She looked at me for a moment 'It is a very nice one, silk?' 'Yes' I confirmed 'Good chioce, have you any others?' 'No I only bought the one' she was clearly thinking about how to manage this news 'Would you like me to lend you a clean one, that one will need a wash now?' I was taken aback by this offer, so she said nothing more just got up and left, returning a few minutes later with a cream full length satin nightie and a matching wrap. 'You ought to have a shower now, get the smell of you and freshen yourself up' as she said this she lay the garments on my bed in full view, there was no mistaking the offer she was making, but I was very worried about this development in the opening out of my secrets.
Slowly I got up and showered and allowed my weakened body to enjoy the warm water washing over me, I washed my hair as well, then dried myself slowly as speed was not going to happen at that time. Then as I went back into my room and saw the satin clothes mother had left for me I just thought 'Where's the harm' and slipped them on and went to get the hair dryer so I could get my hair looking right. Because of the niose I did not hear mother come into the room until she was beside me, 'Here let me do that' and she took the brush and dryer from me and very carefully brushed out my hair curling it under at the bottom. When she was finished, she left me of only to return with some spray lacquer and told me to close my eyes. 'All done. You do suit your hair like that you know.' I could feel her hand through the satin as she rested it on my shoulder. 'You feeling any better? because you are looking much recovered' I told I was feeling a bit better and thanked her for doing my hair, then after a pause thanked her for not being mad at me for wearing a nightie. I was stood at the time and got a big hug 'If my child wishes to wear something as nice as silk or this satin, then I have no problem with it' she stepped back then asked 'Do you like the satin?' I was a little lost for words but managed 'Very soft isn't it' she smiled 'I would say sensual, men don't know what the are missing' I noticed but did not comment on the way she had used the word men there, as though I was not one of them, this was to much for my frail state to handle and went to lie on my bed and watch some daytime TV. Alone I tried to watch, but all I could think of was what had happened and seeing and feeling the cream outfit wrapped around my was not helping me get any rest.
Mid afternoon there was another probing by my mother. She came in with a sandwich and a drink for me to find me sitting up, so she invited me to join her downstairs, immediately I said would get dressed, her response was to pass me a pair of her slippers, and tell me there was no need. So we ended up sat at the kitchen table eating when the probing started 'So I am guessing there's more to this holiday than you have let on so far, anything you would like to tell me dear' She never called me dear, but then she had never styled my hair or given satin nighties before. 'I am thinking somewhere along the way your friends got you all dressed up as a girl, was there just you or did the others dress as well? And I am also thinking you liked the way you looked, not surprising as you do look very feminine dear, even without make up.' Maybe it was because I was still weak, maybe I could see she had worked out most of it for herself but I felt a tear in my eye, and the stress of keeping this from her cracked me. I told her everything, well nearly everything. The dressing so we had four boys and four girls, the having my clothes hidden so I had to live fulltime as a girl, the being taken for a girl when out, the deeper friendships I made with the girls, the fun I had discovered from having such a different chioce of clothes to wear. We left the kitchen for my bedroom where I showed her my small collection of clothes which she studied carefully making sounds which refllected her view of certian styles. Eventually I stopped and she summed up what I had said 'So you have lived as Marie for two weeks and from what I can tell you have found it very satisfying being taken for a woman, but you never mentioned the boys, where did they figure in the picture. If you were not one of the boys and was one of the girls, can I assume you paired off in some way' she was still probing, but I was getting myself together again after the crack in my defences had let her know how much I had liked being Marie. With me clamming up she decided to make up scenarios and see how I reacted. She touched a few items like a mini skirt and the high heels, and commented that these items were definitely not designed for comfort but for their effect on the opposite sex, and seeing as how I had more than one such item as well as a short silk nightie, she surmised that I been playing the part of a girlfriend to one of the lads, and seeing as there was a sexy nightie in my things, then it did not take much to think I had slept with a man. My head was down as she worked out the truth from the evidence, in the end all I could say was 'Sorry' 'What for' she asked, 'Your son has let you down, I am supposed to be a man, be like my father, get married, have kids, all that stuff' I was beginning to tear up again, so she sat beside me and hugged me. 'There is nothing to be sorry about, you have enjoyed yourself, seen another side to life, experienced things I never thought you would, but I am pleased that you have, there, there, dry your eyes, good job you had not got make up on, it would be a mess right now' that got a smile from me 'That's better. Now what you have to think through is, whether this is just a phase you will grow out of, or something that goes much deeper.' she paused so she could lift my chin and look me in the face 'As far as I am concerned, and I know your father will back me up, you have to be you, if you deny yourself who you truly are it will just frustrate you and cause other problems if you try and be someone you are not.' a pause for breath 'Right, that's enough I have some work to do and you have some thinking to do princess' she hugged me and kissed my cheek. 'I suggest you get some paper and make notes, then see if you have a clear answer' and with that she left. My clothes were all out and needed putting away which would be easy compared to the task she had given me, which was not helped by the final word she spoke, she had called me princess, a clear indicator of how she thought I should proceed.
The evening was thankfully easy to handle, father was working late and I was not up to eating a full meal so ate some toast in my room. I had done as mother had asked and made notes, and for and against lists, but had not come out with a clear chioce. I must have fell asleep on my bed as I woke with a start to find father in my room sat at the bottom of my bed looking concerned. 'You feeling better' waking up I said 'much better thanks' then he looked at my body or more precisely my mother's cream satin wrap that is was wearing. 'I hear you and your mother have been having a chat today' I thought of him in his kaftan 'Yes we have' 'Come to any conclusions yet?' he asked 'Not yet I'm sorry, all a bit complicated when you think about it' He looked at me and seemed to be taking care of his next words 'Well you have not changed out of the feminine things your mother gave you earlier, so I would take that as a strong indicator. You could have refused at the time, you could have changed knowing I was coming home, but you have not, therefor I think this is going far deeper than a student prank.' He gave me time to absorb what he had said 'It is for you to decide, but whatever you feel is right then I shall support you be it as Mark or Marie' this was all said in his serious vioce, then he got up to leave and put an affectionate hand on my arm and quite casually said 'Sleep well, you should be fine in the morning dear' he always called me son, this was getting as though they wanted me to be a girl, what with all the words of support and terms or endearment, it was as though I could dress and no one would bat an eyelid.
The next day I made it into work, but still not 100% it was tough with all the lifting and not having eaten much the day before. I got home completely washed out but ready for a nice meal and sleep. Mother took a call from her sister after the meal and I cleared away the pots and tidied the kitchen while father went to watch the TV. It took me a while to finish but as I did she put the phone down on clearly what had been a more serious call than a gossiping chat, she thanked me for doing the cleaning then went to sit with my father and shut the door behind her, clearly I was not to be included in this conversation so I went upstairs to rest and get ready for bed though I still had a couple of hours before I would sleep.
An hour later my parents knocked on my door and entered, I was wearing my mother's night clothes curled up on the bed reading a Cosmo magazine. Father started 'There you are, something has come up with you auntie Jen' I could tell from their tone and body language this was not going to be an easy chat. 'Thing is' mother put in 'Jen needs some time away and was hoping her kids could stop here for the summer' I was confused 'Why ask me, we have spare rooms and they can't be that horrid' 'Well not as we know, but then we have not seen them for years have we? Anyway Lucy is eight and she looks fine, though besides at the christening I have not seen her and Brendan is sixteen and looks ok.' an awkward pause before mother continued, 'What we thought was, they come and stop here, they will need looking after, Lucy especially, and we were thinking that this job of yours seems a little beyond you at the moment with you being sick. What if you let Brendan have the job and you stop home and mind Lucy' I nodded to say I was following their suggestions 'And what if because you no longer are going to work, you live as Marie while you are minding Lucy?' That last sentence stopped me in my tracks, 'But they must know I am Mark, your son' they had clearly thought about this, 'Lucy does not know you, and Brendan is old enough to understand such things' 'And what happens When Lucy tells her mother' 'We will explian everything to Jen beforehand to make sure she is fine with the arrangement. Any more questions?' I thought for a minute 'Why are you so keen to let me do this, most parents would want their son's to become men not women?' Father answered that 'We think you need to be helped making your mind up, and this will commit you to being Marie fulltime, and then all of us can see how well you handle being a girl, with there being a date set for the end of this trial period. It just seems a good oppurtunity if you want to use it' I was letting this offer sink in as they left, mother saying she was going to call auntie Jen and tell her I would not mind looking after them. Five minutes later I went downstairs to tell them I would do it as Marie, mother gave me a big hug and phoned her sister to explian the arrangements.
Mother sorted everything out, she spoke with auntie Jen, who I was told was fine with the situation, she rang work and they accepted that I was not up to the job and were pleased she could send a replacement, obviously they would need to make sure he was suitable but in principal it was fine. Then she decided I needed some more suitable clothing if I was going to be Marie all the time, the kids would be coming on Sunday, so that meant Saturday was shopping day. I had not shopped with her for years but did remember she was good at it. I was not sure if it would be a good experience or not.
My parents fit into the gender stereotype very well, father is a man and wears suits for work, has a set of scruffy gardening clothes and a small collection of not so casual clothes for when he is trying to be not at work. Mother though a successful solicitor does not wear trouser suits and do the power dressing very well, she wears softer and more feminine styles almost stating that she is not trying to be a woman in man's world as some women do with their masculine styles.
The Saturday morning started with me dressing for the first time fully as Marie at home, I had given the breast forms back so had to rely on socks in my bra, and to keep on mother's good side wore the long sun dress instead of a mini skirt, which had the bonus of not needing to hide my male bump to tightly. I had had a shower involving a full body shave, mother had dried my hair and given it the volume I had seen on holiday, I used her cosmetics to do my face, keeping it simple and impressing her with my abilities, even getting a compliment about how good I looked, how well I applied the products and how I must have taken the situation on holiday more seriously than she at first imagined. Once ready I was given a little pep talk about how I should behave and look from that day on. Until the cousins went home I was not to wear any Mark clothes, in fact I would have to bag everything up and put them in the loft. I was going to hopefully project the image of a feminine girl, therefore I would not be getting any flat shoes, a heel she reckoned would keep me in mind of the fact that I was a girl, at least to those who saw me. She would prefer I wore skirts and dresses, but even if I wore trousers I should wear heels and the trousers would need to be tailored women's styles. She had done some research and had found a local supplier of breast forms which she said were not cheap but would be toned to my skin colour and I would be expected to wear all the time, even in bed. She was also prepared to buy a contraption which hid my genitals between my legs and importantly for her it seemed would make it impossible for me to stand when urinating. I had little trouble agreeing to these wishes as I had already spent over a week in that situation, but nodded and said the right words so she knew I was in agreement. She did however make some demands which as she put it would limit any easy flipping between genders, she wanted me to have extended acrylic nails, I had the choice of french tips or ovals, but not whether I had them or not. My eyebrows were to be shaped, and tinted along with my eye lashes. And I should have a nose stud, this was something she had seen on young women and thought it appropriate that I have something so definitely female in the middle of my face. While on the subject of peircings, as soon as my ears had healed I was to wear clearly visible jewelry, her suggestion being hoops no smaller than 30mm or pendants no shorter than 50mm, just so I know they are there and others can see them, necklace, bracelet and a ring were also on the list of regular decorations she wanted me to wear. Then when I was all sorted I should have a spray tan while wearing a bikini set, I asked why, so I have clear girl tan lines which will stop me from going anywhere as a boy and being topless. She also said when it tones down I will look good.
For my part I did not have any immediate problems with her proposals, I wanted to find out just as much as she did, whether living as a woman was the future for me. Mid morning we left father reading his paper and drinking coffee. He gave mother a kiss as they always did, but followed that by unexpectedly kissing me on the cheek and telling me to have a good day. Up till then we had barely touched, he barely touched other men other than to shake hands, but women he would hug and kiss in greeting. This simple action told me I had moved gender in his eyes, I was his daughter now, which took a little getting used too as the reality of what was happening sunk in.
The day with mother was exhausting, interesting, illuminating and totally enjoyable. We first had an appointment at a place that helps men like me, cross dressers, she had found this shop on the internet and was assured they could supply breasts and what they called gaffs. Mother rather took control and soon I was in a changing room, stripped and being examined for skin colour and size. The whole procedure took about an hour to complete before I walked out to meet mother fully dressed but sporting a very realistic pair of gel boobs, tear drop size D I was told, and was not sporting anything visible between my legs. With the use of ice, surgical glue and a specially shaped penis holder I now looked female naked. I was completely amazed and knew mother would want to see the new me when we got home, but I was a little unsure as to how she might react to the transformation. Anyway we paid and left for the shops. After a preliminary look around to see what styles we liked, we rested for coffee and cake. It was in the cafe that I had a few more rules laid down, just so I was clear about things, I was not to look 'common' anyone can look like a cheap tart she informed me, her idea was that I should be feminine, chic if possible. I agreed to aim for chic, but did point out how many girls my age do wear flat shoes, mini skirts, jeans and revealing tops. She just said that was no reason for me to copy them, but did point out again why flats and jeans were not to be in my current wardrobe, though did accept that depending on how this trial period went she would not be controlling my wardrobe in the future.
After our coffee we started buying. A soft cotton skirt. Sleeveless cotton blouse. Silk blouse. Knitted vest top. Several underwear sets. A lightweight jacket. A handbag. Two pairs of sandals. They were clearly for summer and the colours reflected that, pastels, cream and white, nothing strong. All fitted into her image of a smart young woman that I was going to be. This was she explained just a basic starting wardrobe, I would expected to add to these clothes over the next few weeks as my style developed. This bare list does not convey the fear I had as we tried on things to make sure they fitted, nor the embarrassment of having your mother come into the changing rooms with you, to check that I looked good. Anyway that fear overcome and feeling quite drained she informed me we had an appointment at Nailz, and directed me to the shop where an over made up assistant escorted me to her station and asked me what I wanted, I told I was not sure and asked what was popular and most of all smart, not tacky. I walked out some good while later with long french tips, the tips a dusky pink the same colour as my toes. Then I spent time with a girl who waxed my eyebrows into fine arches and tinted them and my eyelashes black. Physically I had rested but psychologically I was shattered. so I easily accepted the offer of a nose stud, not because I did not want one or anything like that, more I could not be bothered thinking for myself, if she had said we are going to put a bull ring through your septum, I would probably come out of the shop with a nice gold ring below my nostrils. Instead I came out with pink stone on the side of my nose which honestly looked very much the part we were aiming for, obvious and pretty.
We got home to find father in the garden, he wanted to know about our day and what we had bought, so I went and changed into the silk blouse, and a long skirt. When I returned my parents were sitting on the lawn drinking white wine and looking pensive. 'Princess, we feel we ought to explain some family history to you.' The princess missed me that time, it was the tone that caught my attention. I took a glass and sat down then they told me why I had not seen my cousins for so long. My father and uncle had fallen out big time possibly ten years before when father accused his brother in law of beating auntie Jen. Jen admitted it was true but would not leave him, father responded by saying that he could not be held responsible for his actions if they meet, so the two families never meet, mother and her sister did meet and talked on the phone, but we also lived at opposite ends of the country, which suited father as he never had to find an excuse for not visiting. Aunt Jen now had cancer and she was starting the chemo which she knew would lay her out for long periods and looking after a family would be too much for her to cope with, so that was why we were hosting my cousins. Quite straightforward really.
As I listened and the wine relaxed me, and my feet stopped aching I was able to enjoy the summer sun on my skin and feel the breeze run through my skirt and over my bare legs. I could get used to this I thought, it just felt so luxurious as I sat back on the lounger. Then I thought what about my uncle and maybe neighbours, my concern must have shown in my voice, uncle would not be told, the kids sworn to secrecy as he would not be understanding, the neighbours I was reassured hardly knew who I was since we had moved with father's job, I had started uni and they had not made many friends, and I had only meet the odd local such as postmen on the few weeks I had been with them. So it was easy for Mark to just disappear and for Marie to take over. I was then asked 'Are you sure this is what you want to do?' I looked at them, then as I took a moment I emptied the last of my wine and I considered how I looked, 'Yes.......I am sure'. 'Good, because this is how you will be until the end of summer, we will not have you doing this living as a woman at anything less the 100%' I topped up the wine glasses 'I do understand, and I do want to find out if this is the real me' Then gave each of them a hug and thanked them for being so generous in giving me this opportunity.
That night I had a new nightie to wear but it did not help me sleep, I was still concerned about exposing my new self to our visitors. I spent an age getting ready not knowing what to wear for such an occasion, in the end I wore a white skirt and pink top and joined my parents for the drive to the airport where we would collect the children from.
The meeting was as strained as I expected though mother did try her best to keep the chatting going. I knew this was going to be hard but just focused on being the feminine me that I had developed over the past weeks. Lucy was a cocky young girl who was a proper girlie girl, she was all dressed to look pretty, whereas Declan was a boy, well built and scruffy in jeans and hoodie, very stereotypical, but that was fine with me, just as long as they did not expect me to conform to their image of what a lad should look like.
We had a very formal evening, they were shown their rooms, and around the house. We had a meal mother prepared while they unpacked, everything was ok, just a little stiff and conversation forced. Possibly the shock of knowing their mother is so ill, maybe being in a strange house, maybe being with a boy who wants to be a girl. Who could tell but I decided to let them have some space and did not go in being pushy and over friendly. It was once I was alone with Lucy on the Monday that I had my first question 'Is it true you are really a boy?' I answered honestly 'Yes I was born a boy' she let this sink in 'so why do you want to be a girl?’ I had rehearsed this one. I asked if she liked being a girl, she said yes she did, so I asked what is wrong with me wanting to enjoy being a girl as well. This logic stopped any more questions, she just asked if I was somehow born with the wrong body, like I should have been born with a girl’s body but I came out with a boy’s by mistake. I liked the idea and said yes I was a girl inside, just the outside lets me down.
After the first few awkward days with Lucy we seemed to click. I took her shopping, on top of the house keeping money I had of mother, there was also a clothes allowance which she said I would need as I would not want to be wearing the same outfits all the time, nor would she want to see me in the same stuff day in day out. So we went to the stores to see if I could find something nice. I came home with a nice lemon sundress, a bikini which was not skimpy, and a sarong. Lucy took great delight in helping me choose, and though I treated it as a game I think she rather took her role as fashion advisor more seriously. I treated Lucy to her first proper bikini as well, which went down well. Mother came home to find us sunbathing in the garden talking about Lucy's boyfriends.
Part of the deal was that I look after the house as well, so I would clean and cook, sometimes with Lucy helping. But I made the effort everyday to do something with her, taking her swimming, to the ice rink, the pictures or just a walk in the park. But what she liked most was being a girl and shopping, sometimes we just went to the shops and looked around never really intending to buy, just browsing and trying on. She soon found out I was easy to manipulate, during the second week I was up late so made everyone’s breakfast in my night clothes, I was still in them when Lucy got up who told me they were gorgeous, within minutes it seemed I had been persuaded to buy her something similar because she was getting to grown up for little girl pajamas. Sure enough that night she slept in a pink satin nightie proudly showing it of to mother before bed. Unexpectedly this incident gave me an insight into why my mother had been so tolerant, as I took Lucy round the shops I got pleasure from helping the little girl dress up, which I reckon could have been subconsciously in mother’s acceptance of Marie.
A change in the parent child relationship happened quite unintentionally, the children were encouraged to ring their mother often so their contact remained strong. This lead to a conversation with Lucy that mother was listening too. I asked Lucy if she was going to call her mother, to which Lucy replied she would call her mummy after tea, but followed it up with another question about why do I call my mummy mother and not mummy. I said I had never thought about it, I had always called her mother and was not that sure she wanted to be called mummy. Lucy with childhood confidence assured me that all mothers like to be called mummy, and when she has children they shall call her mummy. At this point I turned to mother and asked which she preferred, mother, or mummy. Lucy went over to her and informed her she was a mummy, which seemed to sway her answer. 'We could try mummy, now we have two princesses in the house it will fit us better I think' And so from then on I always referred to her as mummy or mummy dear, and she hardly ever called me by anything but an affectionate term like sweetheart or princess.
The six weeks of the holidays rolled by very quickly, Lucy had become my best little friend who would confide in me some of her deeper thoughts, but she was at her best when she was being really girlie and guiding me through the maze of women's styles. Our best times being when we styled each other hair, she had some curling tongues which meant I could make her long hair into a mass of curls. She in return would blow dry my hair giving it such volume I was genuinely in awe of her abilities.
All this time I had kept in touch with Matt and the others, letting them know some of the developments in my personal affairs, for some reason I did not feel able to fully admit to them that I was living full time and could not imagine returning to being a dull boy any time soon.
September came and auntie Jen was still not well, mother or should I say mummy took the kids back to see her and for whatever reason when she came back a few days later, Lucy came with her, Declan it was felt could look after himself and help his father look after Jen, but Lucy given half a chance asked to come back and stop with us. This meant school enrolment and other stuff that my parents sorted out, but what it did mean was that the conversation I was going to have with my parents when mummy got back was impacted on by the presence of Lucy. We were supposed to be having a chat about how the summer had gone with me being a girl, and what was going to happen from then on.
The first thing to discuss was whether I had succeeded in my aim of living as a woman. It was agreed that I had, surpassing any worries that I might have been an odd looking or behaving girl. The second topic was how to proceed if I stayed female, I was unsure about going back for my final year, but father wanted me to complete the course, and then there was Lucy. I suggested that I take a year off, which would mean I go back and continue with the year below who would not know me, which would make things easier. In the mean time I would be around for Lucy. I also included that during that year I could seriously move myself towards true transitioning which would make my return to uni easier. I could see the permanency of this idea was unsettling my father who though he said nothing was reluctant to admit the loss of his son. So made special efforts to be as girlie as possible, highest heels, most body flattering dresses and most important, treat him like a man, let him feel in charge and pander to him so he feels important. Within a week he had been onto the university and arranged everything, even down to my name being changed for when I start in a year’s time.
Then the topic of how far does wanting to be a woman mean when it came to my physical body. I said I was 99% sure that I wanted to live as a woman, the odd things that tugged me towards being Mark again were more than outweighed by the prospect of giving up my new life. Within the week I had seen our GP, been referred to a specialist and had a series of counseling sessions set up, which culminated in the professionals agreeing that I was suitable for gender reassignment. They advised a period of full time living but I was impatient persuaded my parents to at least allow me to get me breasts enhanced. And for my Christmas present, that is what they gave me. They also made me work at father’s office doing telephone answering and filing while Lucy was at school, so I was forced out into the big wide world.
My transition I know went very smoothly, no major obstacles outside what went on in my head. By the time Matt called to tell me had got a 2.1 and a job in a retail chain, I was happily wearing a bra which supported my very own breasts, was due to take my final year, following which I would go for the full reassignment and besides not having ovaries, would become the full woman I desired to be.