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Tim had finally come out to his father about wanting to be a girl. Discover what happens next: Does David, Tim’s father, continue to help his son, now his daughter, achieve her ambitions? Are prayers really answered in the way we think they are? By Sara D. |
A prayer Answered Characters
Sandra Lynn Davidson our star
David Davidson, Sandra’s Father
Claudia, Sandra’s dearly Departed Mother
Brian Allen Jones, Sandra’s best friend now boyfriend
Lisa Ann Brain and Sandra’s adopted Daughter.
Janice Jones, Brian’s mom
Francis Simmons, Maternal Grandfather
Melissa Simmons, Maternal Grandmother
Thomas Davidson, Paternal Grandfather
Joann Davidson, Paternal Grandmother
Linda, Brian’s Sister in college
Amy, Sandra’s friend
Matt, Amy’s boyfriend
Gina, Sandra’s friend
Paul, Gina’s boyfriend
Kim Sanders, A new friend to Sandra
Emily Sanders, Kim’s Mother
Thelma Louis, Sandra’s Therapist.
Pastor Dean, Pastor
Kevin Chambers-Nemesis, bully, And now is Brenda
Brad Chambers - Kevin Chamber’s dad.
Mrs. Bridget Sherman, Principal
Ms. Paula James, English teacher.
Mr. Ed Thompson, Gym teacher.
Mr. James Benison, Vice Principal
Ms. Emily James, Secretary to the Principal
Dr. Frank Jenson, ER doctor
Betty Smith, Nurse at the hospital
Kelly Smith, Betty’s sister.
Officer Ben Thomson, COP.
Yellowstone High School, Sandra’s school “The Yellow Jackets”
Sally, TS specialty store owner
Melanie, Dress shop sales women
Marge, manager of Claudia’s Salon
Mindy, assistant manager
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Tim had finally come out to his father about wanting to be a girl. Discover what happens next: Does David, Tim’s father, continue to help his son, now his daughter, achieve her ambitions? Are prayers really answered in the way we think they are? Gratiously edited by stanman63. Chapter One By Sara D. |
As I drove the 20 minutes it took to get home I thought about what, besides his mother’s death from cancer, could be bothering him. Claudia had not only been my wife, but my best friend as well. We met while I was in the military, and married just a few months later. Sadly, she was diagnosed with a malignant tumor that had attacked her brain and nervous system just two days after Tim’s sixteenth birthday. The doctors couldn’t do anything for her, and her death came and went too quickly. It was hard to deal with, as both Tim and I were in depression for the first month after her funeral. It was a sad time in both our lives; I sought the help of a therapist for us both. Thelma was such a big help with our grieving, that I thank God every day for her help.
Both Tim and I bonded over the next month. Then mysteriously, in the third month Tim once again seemed down, which explains my trip home today. I parked the truck in my driveway and walked into the front door. The house was quiet when I entered and closed the door behind me. I thought the house was empty. I thought maybe Tim was not yet home from school, that is, until I heard soft whimpering coming from his open bedroom door.
Then I heard him quietly praying and this is what I heard.
“Dear Lord why haven’t you heard my prayers? I’ve been good; I have great grades and a loving father. Why is it so hard to get what I need? I mean, since mom died I haven’t had the chance to be me, the real me. I miss mom so much, Lord. I miss our time together as mother and daughter.”
I kind of cringed at what I had just heard; had I heard him right? Mother-daughter time? So I continued to listen, as I might learn what had been bothering him.
“I just wish I could tell Dad how I feel. I want to be Sandra again; just to wear girl’s clothes again would be wonderful. Please Lord, hear my prayer and grant my wish. All I want is to be a good girl, just like when mom was still here. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.”
Tim had finished and began to cry softly again. I had to do something, but thought it better not to barge into his room. So I quietly went back to the front door, opening it, and then shut it loudly and announced I was home.
“Tim, I’m home, I got some time off from work until Monday, and I would like us to spend some time together.”
I waited patiently for an answer, I was pretty sure he was composing himself, not wanting me to see him crying.
“OK, Dad, give me a while. I’m just going to jump in the shower,” Tim answered as I heard the door to the bathroom closed behind him.
I sat down on the edge of my bed and closed my eyes and tried to think. As I did, all of the wonderful memories of dressing myself as a woman came back, which led me to my wife Claudia in the first place?
I met her at the mall one day while I was shopping as Sara and went into a salon that had a new line of cosmetics. I thought it was high time I went in and got some proper makeup and none of that cheap crap from Wal-Mart. So with my head held high I walked into Claudia’s Salon and saw the most beautiful woman I had seen in a while.
I couldn’t help but smile at her as I walked up to the makeup counter. She stood 5’6” hand long brown hair. She was not too thin, with a small chest and a perfect pearl white smile.
As I approached her I was instantly attracted to her, “Good afternoon Miss, I’m Claudia. How can I help you today?” she’d said sweetly.
“I’m Sara, and I’m interested in getting some decent makeup. I need everything,” I said, a little hesitant at what her true reaction would be to me.
“Well, let me help you choose the right color combinations for your skin. I will help you choose what is right for your complexion.”
Claudia began to work on color choices and found what worked for me. I was enjoying this very much and could not stop myself from smiling at each new application of makeup.
“You have very nice skin; I think this color will do you wonders,” she said, handing me a mirror. I couldn’t get over how good she’d made me look. All the stress of going out dressed and going into the mall had melted away.
“Thank you, Claudia. You did a wonderful job, I just wish I could look this good more often,” I said with a sigh.
“Oh you can, my dear. It truly is easy, and I would be glad to show you how,” Claudia said with at smile.
“Really you would do that for me? I hardly know you.”
“Yes of course I’ll teach you, anyone that is willing to spend $200.00 on makeup is worth my time,” Claudia said with a smile.
This beautiful woman sitting in front of me had my full attention, and I even began to flirt with her a bit. “You’re beautiful yourself, Claudia,” I told her with a smile and a flick of my hair from the blond wig I had on.
“Thank you, Sara, I am flattered. You are beautiful, too, but I bet you’re handsome when not dressed up.” Claudia said with a bigger smile while caressing my hand. “I wouldn’t mind meeting your other self some time, maybe for a movie and dinner, say, this Friday evening.”
‘What? Did I just hear her right? She is asking me out on a date. Holy crap, this girl just asked me out. I can’t pass up an opportunity like this. A woman who obviously knows I am a cross dresser, and just asked me out.’
Before I could say anything she said, “Unless you’re not into dating girls?” she pouted.
“Of course I like girls!” I said, sounding offended. ‘I mean, come on, I am a guy under all of this.’ “Sorry if I came off a little brash, I would love to go out with you. I’m David, by the way, when not dressed like this,” I indicated the black Mini and white blouse I had on.
“That would be nice, meet me here at the mall on Friday. I close up the shop around seven.”
“I can’t wait,” I said with a gleaming smile. “I will see you on Friday then.”
“OK David … Sorry, Sara,” She said, correcting herself, thinking I preferred the Fem name.
“It’s OK Claudia. I go by David most of the time anyway,” I told her. With all that said and done, I purchased my new makeup selections and departed. I stopped on the way home to get gas and changed into my male self once again. I got back to my apartment and thought about my upcoming date this Friday. It would be hard to have to wait such a long time, this being Sunday and all. Friday did come quickly though, and I met up with Claudia at her Salon at about 6:45.
I walked up to her and said, “Hello again, Claudia, how are you today?"
“Oh, um hi, who are you? Do I know you?” she said with a puzzled look.
I guess she did not recognize my voice or my face from Sunday. I felt kind of bad and felt she was just teasing me last time into thinking she would actually ask me out, “It’s me, I came last Sunday. I’m David, remember?” I told her hoping it would jog her memory.
“Oh my, it is you. I am so sorry, I didn’t recognize you,” she apologized and looked me up and down while smiling. “Hmm, I was right, you are very handsome, David.”
“Thank you, you look very nice tonight, too. I like your top.” I felt it was necessary to comment on her top. It was gorgeous on her, short sleeved shirt pink and yellow in color that brought out her great completion. “It really suits your complexion.”
“Thank you. No man has ever told me something like that. I might just have to marry you some day,” she said with a snicker.
“That would be wonderful,” I said, blushing.
She locked up her shop and took my hand as she led me to the theater. We continued to talk on the way to the movie. “You know, now that we might see more of each other, I get to pick out what you wear on our next date,” she said with a smile. “And I think a nice pink dress I saw in Macy's would be perfect for you.”
“Oh my, really, that would be fantastic.”
I was visually excited about what she has in mind and she noticed, “Oh, you like that idea, huh? This could be a very interesting relationship.” We continued to the movie and after it went to dinner.
I have to say I’d had a wonderful time with Claudia and told her so.
“This was a fantastic evening, Claudia; I’m having a great time. We should get together again, soon.”
She had a content look on her face which made me smile again, “I think you are right, we should go out again.” Claudia said, while stroking the top of my hand.
Six short months later Claudia and I married in a beautiful ceremony and our lives together started. We purchased our first home two months into the marriage and Tim was born just ten months later. We made an agreement that while Tim was young I would not dress as Sara at home. This was OK with me, as I did not want to do it in front of my son anyway, so we only dressed as ‘sisters’ once in a while and had not done so in a long time. We were parents now and were preoccupied by raising our son.
+++++++++++++++
I shook those wonderful memories from my head as I heard the shower shut off and Tim shut the door to his room. I had not even thought of dressing since Claudia died. The cancer had taken her so quickly that it was such a shock to all of us.
Then I remembered what Claudia had said to me with her dying breath, “Take care of Tim, he is more like you then you know.”
I now understood what she had meant. I just wish she had explained things before it was too late, but I understood why. She was keeping a secret that Tim had entrusted to her. I could not fault her for that; now I had to take care of my son.
‘I have to do something. I know now that he wants to dress as a girl. He even has a name for himself. And I completely understand how he feels, especially at sixteen and what I felt at that age as a closet cross dresser. But now, how do I help him without causing him to withdraw further? I want him to know it’s OK and that I will still love him, even if he wants to be a girl.’
‘I just don’t know where to start. It’s hard to understand kids these days. Fashion trends and sexuality are more easily accepted, but how do I let him know I am OK with it? In addition, he may think I have a religious problem with it. We do go to church each Sunday. He may think that I hold some of those ideals to heart. Which I don’t, like most Christians, I believe in God, but I don’t think it is wrong to be gay, bi, transgendered or whatever. He made me and my son to who we are. And I think it is his will that my son be that way he is and the same as for me. I will find a way. I just need time with my son this weekend, and maybe I will come up with a plan.’
I gathered myself together and waited for Tim in the living room. He soon came out and sat next to me on the couch, “You got time off from work, Dad. That’s great. Can we go to the tractor pulls on Saturday?” he asked excitedly. ‘Now that’s my boy,’ I thought to myself, but as I looked at him I could see the pain in his eyes and I felt bad for him.
“Of course we can Tim. You know how much I would love to do that with you. How about we go out to dinner tonight, and maybe even to the mall after?”
“OK dad that sounds good, can we go to the Outback?” he asked with anticipation.
“Can we go to Outback? You know that’s my favorite place. Sure we can.”
We were soon out the door and drove to Outback and were quickly seated. I watched as my boy ate his dinner, a little light for a sixteen year old boy. But for his stature it was normal. He is not overly tall at 5’4”, 110 lbs. Skinny by my standards, hell I’m the same height, but outweigh him by at least 90lbs, easy. Oh well, I’m not such a young man any more.
His light blond hair had grown since the funeral; I wondered to myself what he would say if I suggested a cut to the shoulder length wisps of hair on his head. Maybe another time. We finished our meal and I paid as we left.
As we drove to the mall I asked, “So Tim, is there anything you need while we roam the mall?”
“Not really, but if I see anything I’ll let you know,” Tim answered with a knowing smile.
I’m sure in his mind he was screaming at himself to tell me what he really wanted, but was too afraid to talk to me about it. And I could tell by the sad look on his face that he was struggling with himself.
As we entered the mall it was filled with the familiar sights of families, teenage girls and boys wandering around, flirting in a typical fashion. As we walked the mall I watched my son watching all the girls walk by. He had good taste; most of the girls he was eyeballing were very pretty. I was the same way when I was his age, looking at the girls and wanting to be them, or with them. I wondered if he was thinking the same thing.
My feet were getting a bit tired so I indicated a bench to sit on. Tim and I sat and I noticed we were across from Forever 21. I saw Tim was discretely looking into the store at all the nice clothes they had. Also, I noticed him starring at a very pretty young lady inside the store who seemed to be about his age. She had long brunette hair, green eyes and was wearing a green skirt and white top. I could only chuckle to myself and think that my boy has a crush on her.
“She’s very pretty, Tim. You should go talk to her. Do you know her?”
“That’s Kim; she’s in a few of my classes. She is pretty, huh Dad,” Tim said and I knew he was thinking to himself how nice it would be to wear the outfit she had on. ‘But would she go out with a guy that wanted to be a girl?’
“I don’t think she would want to go out with a guy like me, Dad.”
“Why is that son?”
“I don’t think I’m her type.”
“You will never know unless you talk to her, Tim. I remember how embarrassing it can be to talk to such a pretty girl. Go on, go talk to her.”
“I can’t, Dad. She won’t want to date a guy like me,” Tim said with a sad face.
“What do you mean a guy like you? You’re not telling me you’re gay, are you. Not that I would care,” I said, opening the door for him to tell me how he was feeling.
“I’m not gay, Dad!” Tim almost screamed, and then paused for a minute. “You wouldn’t mind if I was?”
“Of course I wouldn’t mind. You are my child, and I love you unconditionally and would not care if you are gay or whatever.”
“Really?” he said with a little excitement.
“Yes, I will love you no matter what. So are you saying you are gay then?”
“I said I’m not gay, Dad, just different.” He said blushing.
“Different how?”
“You sure you won’t get mad?”
“No I won’t get mad. Just tell me.”
“Dad, it’s um uh …” I could tell Tim was struggling to get out what he wanted to say. “Dad … I want to be a girl,” Tim finally said, then looked down at the floor.
“A girl, what makes you think that you want to be a girl, Tim?"
“It’s how I feel, Dad. I’ve known since I was around six. Mom knew how I felt; I just made her promise not to tell you. She even bought me some clothes I could wear and I could be myself with her,” Tim spilled the beans. Then he continued, “Ever since mom died I have not been dressed in those clothes, hoping the feelings would go away. But they haven’t, they’ve increased. More and more every day I wish I could just magically turn into a girl just like Kim. That’s why I know she would not go out with me; she’d have to be a lesbian. All I know is, Dad, is that I really want to be a girl. Mom and I had good times together. She always helped be dress, and when I was thirteen she taught me how to do makeup.”
“I am very proud of you Tim for being able to tell me how you feel. You know, you and I have a lot in common, did you know that?” I felt it was a good time to come clean about myself.
“How do you mean, Dad?” Tim had a puzzled look.
“Well when I was your age I had faced the same issues as you do. I never did tell anyone in my family about Sara. Your mother was the only one who knew of her.”
“Who’s Sara, an old girlfriend?” he asked innocently.
“No Tim, I am Sara. At least I used to be before you were born. I’m a cross dresser too, but stopped when you came to your mom and me. I had more important things to worry about, like raising a son for instance.”
“You wear women’s clothes? I never knew. Mom said you and I had a lot in common but never told me about this. Do you think you will dress again, Dad?
“Maybe someday, but first let’s deal with you. What would you like to do?”
“If you would not mind, I would like to do some shopping for a few new clothes, as I’ve outgrown what I have stashed,” Tim said with a half smile.
“Sure, how about you lead the way?”
“Thanks, Dad.” Tim said, and gave me a hug. Tim hadn’t done that since his mom’s funeral, and I felt good that he had finally come out of his shell. Well, at least I hoped that is what was happening.
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Tim had finally come out to his father about wanting to be a girl. Discover what happens next: Does David, Tim’s father, continue to help his son, now his daughter, achieve her ambitions? Are prayers really answered in the way we think they are? Graciously edited by stanman63. Chapter Two By Sara D. |
A son no more stood in front of me and entered the changing room. I looked at my new daughter in a new light. I was thinking of Tim as Sandra now, my daughter. It’s going to be a long road for her, I have to support whatever decision she makes for herself. I knew her answer even before she did. The glow on her pretty face as she stepped out of the fitting room in that red satin dress. It fit perfectly except for needing help in the chest. If you’ve ever seen the look on your child’s face on Christmas morning getting that special toy they’ve always wanted then you know that look. A look of contentment and utter love, I could not help but smile at her as she twirled around happy as can be.
“I love it dad, what do you think?” Sandra said with great anticipation.
“I think it suits you well Sandra, you are certainly a beautiful girl even without make up,” I said then realized I had used her feminine name, oops.
“Thank you dad, I am going to need more than this you know. I hope you can handle the shopping needs of a sixteen year old girl.” Sandra said with a grin then paused as she realized I called her Sandra. “You just called me Sandra, how did you know.” She asked puzzled.
“God has mysterious was of answering prayers Sandra, and in a way told me to be at home to answer it and here we are.”
“Thank you, I love you daddy," Sandra said as she hugged me.
Sandra and I spent the rest of the evening shopping at several stores; I must tell you I feel broke now. I am really going to need to work more hours to make up for this. As we got home and I helped her put away her new things I wanted to see what she felt about what was next for her.
“You know Sandra, your dad is going to have to work overtime to make up for all of your new clothes, shoes, make up and jewelry, “ I said with a chuckle. “I don’t want you to put all of these clothes away and then not wear them.”
“Oh daddy, don’t worry I intend to never wear boys clothes again. In fact if you will let me, I would like to throw them all out.” Sandra said with conviction.
“What about school sweet heart; aren’t you afraid what will happen when you show up dressed as a girl.” I asked now truly worried as to what might happen to my baby, I don’t want her to get hurt.
“I can’t hide who I really am anymore, if they can’t accept me like I am then they were never friends to begin with. Besides, Sandra has more friends than you’re aware of dad.”
“As long as you are sure about this, I will contact the school and tell them of your decision. But I am sure they will want you to talk to a psychologist to confirm you are truly going to transition.”
“We can talk to Thelma, she knows all about me dad, she told me when I was ready she would be able to help.”
“Am I the only one that was kept in the dark about my daughter?” I said with a fake pout.
“Daddy, you were only kept in the dark because I was afraid of what you would think about me being a girl. Mom kept insisting you would be OK, but I never got over that fear and then mom passed away before I had the courage to talk to you about it. Now God has answered my prayer and here I am, I’m putting away my new clothes and planning on living the rest of my life as me, the real me Sandra,” She said sounding much happier and content than she ever has in the past few months.
It took us about an hour to put away all her new things and to box up her old clothes. I put them in the garage later in the night and sat down and watched television. Sandra joined me a bit latter wearing her new pink satin nightie and snuggled up to me. I felt content and happy for my new daughter and felt the day was productive and healing in a way. What will the future hold for me and Sandra? I just hope I am doing the right thing.
Shortly after she laid her head on my chest she fell asleep, she was asleep for a few minutes and I began to get tire myself. I felt bad about waking her but we both needed the rest. As I tucked her into her bed I gave her a kiss on the forehead and said good night.
“Good night Sandra, sleep well,” As I left I heard her pray once again and knew I could hear her.
“Dear lord, I want to thank you for answering my prayer. I have the most wonderful daddy in the world. Bless him and keep him, in Jesus name I pray. Amen.”
“That was nice sweetie, now get some sleep.”
“Good night….daddy.”
I closed her door and went to my own room and got under the covers and slept better than I had it months. ‘Thank you God for my beautiful daughter’. I prayed just before falling to sleep.
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Sandra is David’s new daughter and is happy and content. Sandra takes over the story as we follow her through her exposure to Brian her best friend and has an appointment with a psychiatrist Dr. Louis. Authors note: I’ve never written like this, two people telling different sides of the story. I Hope you like it. Graciously edited by stanman63. Chapter Three By Sara D. |
What a wonderful feeling to wake up to all these new clothes and to never have to put on another stitch of boys clothes again. It has been a tough couple of months for Dad and me; with mom gone we both were hurting. But now I have a better outlook and more to look forward too.
I just wish mom was here to witness the re-birth of her daughter to the world. I went and took a shower and made sure I was clean and neat, shaving my legs and underarms as I had in the past. I dried off and looked at the mirror and started to dry my hair as the familiar female face appeared once again. I couldn’t help but get excited and things arose as I applied makeup once I was happy with my hair.
I was interrupted by a knock on the door, “Sandra, I called the school about you so you won’t be going today I also made an appointment with Thelma at ten, so take your time sweetie and I’ll make us some breakfast.”
“OK Dad, I’ll only be a few minutes.”
Well I did have practice you know, mom taught me well when we had our time together. I just hope Dad and I will be able to connect in a similar fashion. I guess I’ll find out soon enough. I walked back into my room after finishing a great job on my long blond hair and makeup, if I say so myself. I could not help but staring at the pretty teenage girl staring back at me in my dresser mirror.
I now had the task of picking out what to wear. I don’t mind you know, the time it takes to pick the right outfit, with all these new selections before me I was just a little overwhelmed. I finally decided on a black stretch skirt that came to just above the knee with a complimentary red blouse, black tights and my new black one inch pumps. After that I sat at my desk and filed and then painted my nails a lovely lavender color to match my eyes.
I was so happy at this point I could not help but get frustrated again with things arising when not wanted. I realized I needed to take care of things, grabbed a towel from my laundry hamper and relieved the pressure. I must say I never once experienced such an unbelievable orgasm in my young life, it’s a good thing I had that towel or I would surely had to change.
Once things were back to their normal size I once again tucked myself and gave my front a more lady like look.
I walked out and joined my dad who was just finishing setting breakfast on the table; I took a seat and saw him staring at me.
“You look beautiful this morning Sandra, I can see that your mother indeed did teach you a lot. Nice choices on your outfit, a little sexy for a meeting with your shrink, but you are sixteen after all,” He said a little sternly.
“Daddy…..all girls my age dress this way, well most of the time,” I said in aggravation.
“I know Sandra, I was with you at the mall and completely understand that the way you dress is an expression on how you feel and a statement to the world you are indeed a girl, which no doubt no one will argue after seeing you like this,” he said with compassion and understanding.
“Thanks Dad, what did the school say when you called them?” I asked as I ate some bacon.
“I just told them your decision to attend school as Sandra and that we are working with a therapist who will provide written verification on your intent to transition to a girl full time. They said they have had others in the past and currently so there’s no problem with the school. All your teachers will be told to expect Sandra Monday morning, and Mrs. Sherman wishes you good luck and wanted to see you first thing on Monday before first period.”
“OK, thanks Dad. You know I’ve been thinking about a few things this morning. I know I want to be a girl, but after what happened while getting dressed I am not sure about changing everything,” I told him then explained about the experience in my room.
“Well that is for you to decide Sandra, and Thelma will be able to help you find out what you are indeed meant to be.”
Dad and I finished breakfast and talked the whole time, he’s great and I can’t get over how cool he is with all of this. I was still thinking about if I really want to keep it or not. You know my thingy, I was unsure. I was chewing my last bite of egg when the door bell rang. It was Friday morning about 7:30 am, 'Who could that be?' I wondered.
Dad must have seen the puzzled look on my face. “Do you want me to get that Sandra?”
“No, it’s OK. I will have to face the world soon enough,” I told him and got up and went over to the door and opened it and when I did standing there looking me up and down was my best friend of fourteen years Brian.
'Oh ooh, I thought I’m not ready to confront him right now. He’s going to think I’m gay, I don’t even know for sure myself which way I will go. I like girls, but do I like boys? I don’t even want to go there right now. He is kind of cute though, did I just think that? Oh crap, I guess I had better invite him in and explain.'
But before I could say one word, “Hi, is Tim at home?” He asked smiling at me.
“Umm…Sure…..Yah, just a second, come on in a take a seat, Hi,” I said not knowing how to continue. “I’m Sandra, but you can call me Sandy.”
“It’s nice to meet you Sandy,” He said sweetly, obviously attracted to the girl I was portraying. He then saw my Dad. “Hi Mr. D. where’s Tim?” Brian asked and sat across from my dad at the table.
I guess I should describe Brian for you, he’s 5’4”, brown hair, green eyes and tan skin and a slight European accent. His family moved from England when he was younger and he picked up a little of that accent from his folks.
I took the same seat I had occupied prior to answering the door, and as I sat I took a deep breath and began.
“Tim is right here Brian,” I said gesturing to myself. “I am Tim, was Tim I mean.”
Brian looked at me with wide eyes and stared at me, again looking at me up and down. It was very hard to read his expression an almost stale look appeared on his face then one of recognition once he realized I was not kidding him.
“You’re shitting me right? This has got to be some sort of joke, right? You’re pulling my leg?” He said then laughed.
“No I am not kidding Brian, this is me now, the real me. I’ve always felt I should be this way, I just need time to figure out what is next and I also need your support.”
“What are you some sort of fag or something? Come on what the fuck is this shit? You’re supposed to be my best friend and now I find out your some sort of fairy, a freak. I’m out of here!” he said with anger and left my house in a hurry.
I was just in such a good mood now I’m sad again. Had I truly hurt my friend or what? I sat and started to cry and Dad came over to me and gave me a hug and comforted me. I continued to cry softly into his shoulder then he said something I will never forget.
“Sandra, I love you and no matter what, I will support you. You have to understand that Brian has to figure this out in his head, he’s your best friend in the whole world and he probably feels you betrayed him and killed off his one true best friend,” Dad said a little teary eyed himself. “Don’t let one person make you second guess the way your life is destined to go. He will be back, I promise.”
“Thank you Daddy, I feel a bit better now,” I then went to the bathroom and fixed my makeup as my mascara had run while I was crying.
We sat and talked a while waiting for the time to go by, I began to understand my dad more and more after this. We did have a lot in common in dressing but he never felt like a girl he told me. He just liked the clothes, me I knew from a young age I was meant to be a girl full time. But now I was unsure of things and hoped that Thelma would be able to help. Once enough time had passed Dad drove me downtown to Thelma’s office. I was a bit apprehensive when we arrived but found the courage somewhere deep down to get out of the car. I entered her office with my head held high and with confidence as my dad and mom had told me to do.
I sat in a chair as my dad filled out a few forms at the reception window, I looked at the pile of magazines on the table in front of me and picked out a Seventeen magazine and began reading it while waiting for Dr. Louis to call for me. A few minutes later the pretty receptionist called me in.
“Ms. Davidson, Dr. Louis will see you now,” She said as she ushered me into the back of the office into Thelma’s treatment room.
I walked in and was greeted by Thelma, “Well, it’s nice to finally meet you Sandra, please have a seat and we will chat.” She said nicely, “You look very nice by the way; pretty even. You make a very nice looking girl Sandra.”
“Thank you Thelma,” I said a bit embarrassed.
“I see you finally came out to your dad. Congratulations on getting this far. He’s told me that you plan on living like this full time, possibly permanently.”
“Kind of, I am not sure now, what I mean is that while I got dressed this morning something happened that made me think I am not completely sure what I’m supposed to do,” I then recounted what had occurred that morning in my room and the use of the towel.
“Your reaction is perfectly natural Sandra, as you are still physically male and you still have male hormones running through you this was bound to happen. This is why we are here, to find what is right for you. Are you second guessing being a girl?” she asked that motherly way she had.
“Absolutely not, I am a girl I just don’t know how I feel about my male parts; it felt so good, so right. I just I don’t know if I’m willing to part with it right now. Is this something I need to decide right away?” I said almost in tears.
“No, you can take your time in deciding what you ultimately want. You have time to decide, what would you do if you were told you had to go back to being a boy?”
“I would tell whoever that was to piss off, I am a girl, and I just need to figure things out. What I am sure about is that I do want to look as much like a girl as possible, you know hormones and stuff.”
“I can definitely tell you are sure you are girl, mentally anyways. Even in your past sessions you were sure you were a girl then, you just had to come out of your shell and show the world that you really are a girl. If you want I can prescribe hormones for you, you will need a shot and then take pills every day.”
“Thelma, I am mentally prepared for that, I have dreamed of being a complete girl for a long time. I know what will happen and that it will take time to see changes and what it will do to my male libido.”
“You’re a smart girl and I am sure this is right for you, I just need your father’s approval and I will write a letter explaining the situation to the school and it will allow you to attend school as a girl.”
“Thank you Thelma, you are such a help. I know that talking to you in the future will help me in the decision.”
With that I hugged her goodbye and told Dad that she wanted to speak to him. I picked up the Seventeen magazines and finished reading it while I waited for Dad. When he returned he sat next to me and patted me on the shoulder.
“You sure you want this?” he said smiling.
“More than anything Daddy, it’s who I am, and who I’m going to be.”
“OK, I just wanted to be sure you were sure about this,” he said rubbing my shoulder and with that the nurse came and took me back and gave me a shot in the bum, and it hurt. I was then handed a prescription for hormones to pick up on the way home. Dad and I picked up the prescription at the pharmacy and went out for lunch.
After lunch and as a surprise Dad took me to Mom’s old salon. He still owned it but had Marge running it now that Mom was gone. I was soon seated by Marge at a nice salon chair and treated to what I have to say was luxurious. Once she had finished I saw she had put highlights in my hair. As I was drooling over the teen girl in the mirror I felt a small prick in my right ear then the left as Marge pierced my ears then put some lovely emerald studs in the new holes. I could not feel more feminine at this point. The experience had felt so wonderful but those same feeling I had that morning returned as things became uncomfortable for me down there. I know once I was home and had some privacy I would once again need that towel.
Dad drove us home and as we drove up to the house I saw Brian waiting on our porch for us to get home. I cautiously walked up to the front door.
“Hi Brian,” I said quietly and looked at the ground, I began thinking about apologizing to my best friend about the long time lie but he said sorry first.
“I am so sorry for earlier Sandy, can you forgive me? I should not have cursed at you and I should not have left the way I did,” Brian said with emotion.
“I’m the one who should be sorry Brian. I should have been able to tell you about this a long time ago, and I was just afraid what you would think about me.”
“It’s me who’s at fault Sandy, what I said, the words I used were wrong. You are my best and only friend; we have stuck together since we met.”
“Thanks Brian, you are a true friend and I forgive you as long as you can forgive me for hiding it from you,” I said and was surprised when he gave me a friendly hug.
“I forgive you Sandy,” He said patting my on the back with a slight sniffle. “I do love you, you know that don’t you.”
“Yes of course, I love you to Brian,” Then Brian got a big grin on his face and looked me in the eyes.
“You know, I’ve never had a girlfriend, will you be my girlfriend? Please?” He said with honesty and sincerity.
“Brian!” I had to think, do I want this, what will Dad think. I turned and saw he had been standing off to the side letting us talk without intruding. He shrugged as in it was my decision. “I honestly don’t know Brian, I mean you’re cute and all, and I guess we could give it a try for a while to see what happens.”
“Yes! I have a girlfriend. Yah me!” He said jumping with glee. As a nerd I could understand why.
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Sandra has started her transition and will attend school as a girl. Also Brian has asked Sandra to be his girlfriend, how did Brian go from being pissed to this in one short day. Follow Sandra Saturday and going with Dad and Brian to the truck rally. Chapter four By Sara D. |
“Brian, what happened after you stormed out and what made you change your mind about me?” I asked as we walked into the house went to my room and sat on my bed. Dad walked past my room and saw us but went into the den, obviously to give us space to talk.
“As soon as I got to school and calmed down a bit and then I started to feel guilty about what I said. All the memories of our time as best friends came to me and I could not help but smile at all the good times we have had. I also felt bad because in the back of my mind when I first saw you this morning I thought you were pretty hot and was thinking on how I could ask you out. And when you told me who you were, I guess I kind of just flipped out without thinking about your feelings and I guess it kind of pulled at my own feelings of not wanting to be considered gay for liking you. What I mean is I have always liked you, even as Tim, but now that you are Sandra I am sure I like you even more than before. I was just afraid you would not want to be my friend if you knew I was gay. And I am sorry for the way I acted earlier.” Brian said with compassion and warmth.
“That does explain a few things, and I appreciate your honesty Brian, I like you too, but I am still unsure of what my feelings are about liking boys or girls in a relationship way. I was like you said, afraid of what you and others would think, that is why I need time to figure things out. Things are going to be different for me on Monday. Everyone at school will know immediately who I am and what I’m doing. I have read many web sites and stories of how transgendered kids and teens are treated. Some are treated well while others are hated and betrayed. I’m not sure I want to drag you along with the bad parts, finding out that I want to be a girl is one thing, but those also knowing you’re my boyfriend might make things for you bad as well.”
“I know you're right about that but I am still your friend and will support you in this no matter what.” Brian said.
“You may change your mind after Monday, Brian. I know that I have feelings to sort out and I’m not sure I want the added stress of worrying about what might happen to you.”
“I understand Sandra and I will give you the space you need until you decide what is right for you, I’ll be patient and will wait.” Brian said with a slight smile.
“What are you smiling at?” I asked him with my own smile
“I just can’t get over how pretty you are, and how lucky I am to have a friend like you,” he said as he took my hand in his.
I kind of shrugged as he held my hand the let it happen, what the hell I thought to myself. I am a girl now, isn’t this what happens between a girl and a boy that are friends. Shit I didn’t know or how I’m supposed to feel right now. “Brian you’re a good friend and I do love you too, but let’s take this slowly and see how we feel down the road, okay?” I asked him and smiled.
“You're right Sandra; I’m just excited about all of this. I mean look at you.” I saw our two faces in the mirror over my dresser. “You're prettier then my sister and most of the girls at school, it’s uncanny.” Brian said and I had to agree that I did look beautiful if I must say so.
Brian and I spent about an hour just talking and every once in a while him or I would hold the others hand. It never got any further than that. My dad knocked on my bedroom door about that time and I got up and opened the door. If you must know it was never locked.
“What’s up Dad?” I asked as he came in.
“It’s getting late you two. Brian it’s time for you to be getting home, you can see Sandra again tomorrow.” My dad said smirking and then smiled at us.
“Ok Mr. D. I guess it is time to go, it’s almost 9:30.” Everyone I know called my dad Mr. D. “See you tomorrow Sandra.” Then he gave me a friendly hug goodbye.
After Brian left I followed Dad into the living room, I was sure he wanted to talk. I smoothed my skirt under me as I sat.
“So how is Brian taking all of this?” Like he didn’t know. Dad’s cute sometimes, always knew how to start a conversation. I was realizing how stupid I was about not telling him about me when Mom found out.
“He is actually excited about it to be honest, Dad. He acted pissed this morning because he has always felt feelings for me. But I am still unsure of how I feel about him, boys if you know what I mean.”
“I understand how you feel honey, not knowing for sure is normal. You're only sixteen and just started hormones as a girl. You may find in time you like boys more and more as you get older. Just take your time and at least you know you have a friend that will be there for you when you need him. Also be careful because as pretty as you are now, even knowing you were once a boy. Boys at school are going to find you attractive and will flirt with you. And no matter what happens, even if you decide to marry a man or a woman, I will still love and support you.”
“I love you Daddy.” I said with tears in my eyes and gave him a big hug.
“I love you to sweetie.” Dad said with a tear in his eye. “There must be something in my eye,” he said as he smiled at me breaking the hug.
“Oh Daddy, you’re such a kidder.” I said as I lightly punched him in the arm, God I love that man I’m so blessed to have him as a daddy.
“I know sweetie, you better get cleaned up and ready for bed.
“Thank you Dad.” Again I hugged him tight and thanked God for answering my prayer. “Dad?”
“Hmm?”
“I love it when you call me sweetie…. It sounds so feminine.”
“You’re welcome, now of to bed with you.”
I cleaned off my makeup in the bathroom then undressed in my room. I placed the skirt and blouse in the laundry hamper, and then I washed out my bra, panties and pantyhose in the sink and hung them on the towel rack. I showered and shaved everywhere again and then put on a fresh pair of panties and put on my lavender nightie. I lay down and thought about my day. As I recalled all the feelings of the nice clothes and Brian, thing arose and I again had to use that stupid towel to clean up. But I was starting to like that feeling. I knew from the moment I got that shot earlier that this feeling would not last for long and it would slowly fade away. I was ok with that. I then fell asleep.
I woke the next morning with an erection as normal, but it coincided with a very vivid dream I had. I was standing on the Alter with a beautiful white wedding dress and was kissing Brian at the completion of our wedding. I was in love and melted into his arms. We were then in bed together, what was weird is that I was still physically a male and enjoyed what Brian and I had done. I really need to talk to Dr. Louis about these feeling, did I jump the gun on the hormones. Is it too late? No, I’m a girl why am I feeling this way. I want to be a complete girl, but why am I masturbating, why does it feel so good, and why am I so confused? I succumbed to the urge and once again needed a towel to clean up. I then thought as long as I have the equipment I might as well enjoy it while I can. But I’m still confused.
I then dragged myself to the bathroom, showered, put makeup on, and dressed. I put on a clean pair of panties, bra and then pulled out a pair of black tights, pink skirt and red blouse. I then fixed up my hair and went down stairs where Dad was cooking breakfast.
“Good morning sweetie, you look beautiful this morning.”
“Thanks Dad, we're still on for monster trucks right?”
Dad smiled and said. “Of course, I told you I have the tickets, remember I have three, one for Brian.”
“Oh that’s right cool.” We always took Brian; he loves it as much as Dad and I. “What time are we going to leave?”
“Around 10:30, well stop and get snacks on the way.”
“Ok, I’ll call Brian and see if he still wants to go.” I dialed his number and he answered in a sleepy voice.”
“He…Hello”
“Good morning sleepy head.” I said in a cheerful voice.
“Hi Sandra, what time is it?” He asked sounding a bit more awake.
“Its 8:30 now get up and get ready; Dad and I are taking you to the monster truck show today.”
“Monster trucks, hell Yah! What time does it start?” Brian said now fully awake and excited.
“At noon, you excited about going?” I asked teasingly.
“You know I am I love monster trucks. Thanks for asking, and I even get to go to my favorite past time with the most beautiful girl I know.” I could almost hear him smiling as he said that and I could not help but blush. “I just need to get up, take a shower and get dressed. What time does your Dad want to leave?”
“Around 10:30 as to get good parking and to walk around the parking lot so we can drool over all the modified trucks that will be there.” I said getting more excited every minute; you see I have this thing for big trucks and classic cars. I may want to be a girl but I still like flashy cars.
“Ok I’ll be around your house about ten, is that okay?”
“Yes of course its okay you goof. I can’t wait to get going.”
“Me too I’ll see you in a bit, bye for now.” Brian said with anticipation.
“See ya.” I said as I hung up the phone. Now what am I supposed to do for the next hour and a half while waiting for Brian to show up? I spent about twenty minutes in front of the mirror making sure I looked presentable, then I admired my girlish figure for another ten minutes, I could not get over the feeling of that skirt and tights I had on. I know, a bit much for a monster truck rally, forgive me it was my first date. Yes I am calling it a date. I figure what the hell. I might as well enjoy Brian’s company as a girl while I’ve got him wrapped around my finger. I snickered as I thought about it.
Well that really girly episode in front of the mirror only lasted half an hour, what to do for the next hour while I wait? I was getting impatient so I called Brian again; I know girls don’t call boys.
“Hello.” Brian answered
“Hey Brian, are you ready yet? I’m getting bored and was wondering if you wanted to come over now and we could talk while we wait to go.” I asked a little anxiously.
“Sure, I’ll be right over. I am a boy after all. It doesn’t take me forever to get ready,” he said with a laugh.
“This is true, but I’ve been ready for hours and I am antsy for you to come over.”
“You are, really? That’s great I’ll be over in a sec,” he said and hung up.
I heard a knock on the front door only a matter of minutes later and answered it. Brian took one look and I then smiled ear to ear.
“Gosh you're pretty, Sandra, I don’t know how you’re able to look so dammed sexy having been a boy just two days ago. But I’m not complaining.” He then took my hands in his and I could not help but blush again as I smiled back at him. I was feeling extra special and feminine with all this attention I was getting from him in the last ten seconds. Who cares, I was feeling lovely and Brian likes me. I guided him into the house and he said hello to my dad who just walked out from the den.
“Good morning Brian, how are you today?”
“Just fine MR D. Thanks for letting Sandra invite me along.”
“You’re always welcome, Brian, even more so now. Sandra’s going to need support from friends like you Monday.”
“Thank, I will always support her, no matter what happens. Even if she doesn’t want to be my girlfriend in the end, I will be there for her.”
“That’s very adult of you Brian and I would be proud to have you as Sandra’s boyfriend if you so choose.”
“Hey, don’t I get a say in all this?” I said trying to sound hurt and pouting.
“Of course you do, sweetie, you’ll get to pick out the dress for your wedding day once Brian and I are done planning it.” My dad said sarcastically.
“Daddy, that’s not very funny. I haven’t even picked out my dress for prom yet.” I retorted.
“Touché my dear, you have some wit. That’s my girl, just like Dad.” Dad said with pride then changed the subject all the while Brian was quite the whole time. “So who’s on for cotton candy and pink popcorn when we get to the stadium?”
“Me….ME!” Brian and I said simultaneously, Dad knowing those were our two favorite snacks to get while at the show.
We then got into the car and made our way to the show, Brian, Dad and I had a wonderful time and got to see lots of tricked out cars and trucks. Had you been there you would have seen a father and daughter accompanied by her boyfriend. Brian made several attempts to hold my hand and I never once objected. I felt very feminine when he did it. And I would always smile back at him to reassure him I was okay with it. The more I thought about it the more I became sure about which direction I would go. Don’t get me wrong though, I was also thinking about experiencing things before I was complete. I will just add it to the list of things to ask when I see Dr. Louis again.
Brian, Dad and I chatted about all the cool stuff we saw while driving home. Brian and I were in the back seat and he kept really close to me the whole time. I did not mind one bit. Just the way it felt when he would brush up against my nylon covered legs felt exhilarating. I think I will be ok with a boyfriend at some point, which will of course be Brian I am sure, at least I think I am sure; it’s just one more thing to add to my list.
“Did you two have fun today?” Dad asked breaking my deep thinking, and then I realized I was staring into Brian’s green eyes and he was doing the same.
“Yes, I think we both had a great time. I am really glad Sandra invited me along, it sure was nice being seen with the most beautiful girl in town,” he said sweetly and smiled at me as we got out of the car.
“Thanks for coming Brian, I had a wonderful time.” Then I did something totally unexpected and on impulse, I kissed Brian on the cheek and giggled like a little school girl after. He gave me the most wonderful smile.
“Thank you Sandra, that was nice of you to invite me. I sure do enjoy being with you.”
“Me too, I think we should go out again.” I said then wondered if I would regret it later, nah, never mind I am sure I want too.
“How about we go to a movie after church tomorrow? I wouldn’t mind seeing Madagascar 2.” Brian asked.
“Oh yah I would like to see that. Is that okay with you, Dad?”
Sure it’s okay. Would you like to borrow the car? I wouldn’t want to be a third wheel.” Dad said smiling.
“Thanks Dad.” I then started to laugh a little since Brian couldn’t drive yet because he had failed the written test and I had my license already.
“What’s so funny?” Brain asked.
“Well I’m the girl and I’m the one who will be driving. I just found that to be funny.
“Ha Ha, very funny Sandra, I’ll see you tomorrow then. Mom wants me home for dinner.”
“Your mom, how’s she taking all of this?” I asked forgetting all about him and his family. I was so stupid not to ask how things are at his house and family. I was only thinking of myself.
“Well … Um I haven’t told anyone yet. I was going to do that tonight. And I think it would be best to introduce you later, after I break the ice per say.”
We parted ways with a hug and I walked into the house in a dreamy state with Dad not far behind. I sat on the couch, took my shoes off and relaxed through a quiet dinner. After cleaning up and getting ready for bed, Dad reminded me of church.
"Don’t forget to wake early. You’ll need extra time to get ready for church.” Dad said with a big smirk.
I hadn’t thought about church since this began, heck it had only been a few days. Crap, what will Pastor Dean think? Hell what will all the other parishioners think? I’m in big trouble. Dad must have seen the horrid look on my face because he told me not to worry.
“Don’t worry; Pastor Dean is okay with you attending church as Sandra. He is very progressive and says that you are most welcome as always and that no one at the church will bother you. In fact, most of them may ask as to why you were a tomboy. Pastor Dean is understanding and compassionate. You have nothing to worry about sweetie.”
“Thanks Dad, good night.”
“Good night my daughter, I love you.” Dad finally said as I started off for my room.
“I Love you too, Dad.” I then gave him a big hug and went fast to sleep.
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Sandra goes to church and spends her first date with Brian at the movies where she meets a new friend. Janice Brian’s mom has a chat with Sandra’s Dad David. Chapter five By Sara D. |
“Wow, don’t you look gorgeous?” Dad said with a smile. “Everyone is going to be so pleased to see my beautiful daughter.” He continued with pride. “I’m so proud of you Sandra, you’re the perfect girl and I hope that you find what you want in life truly and emotionally.” He said and I could not help myself and gave him a hug.
Everyone at the Calvary chapel was definitely pleased to see the girl I had become. Everyone I spoke with including Mrs. Clements the older ultra conservative said it was about time I came out of my tomboy stage and acted like a true girl. I couldn’t help but smile and think only if she knew the truth. I had to stifle a snicker as dad and I took our usual seats in the pews. As we were walking out of the church Pastor Dean stopped us and gave my shoulder a friendly squeeze as I walked up to him.
“You’re very brave to take the steps you have to become who you were meant to be, it took a lot of courage to come out to your father and the rest of the world. Some people will ostracize you for your decision but I believe god has a plan for all of us and you are only fulfilling part of that plan. I will pray for you and ask god to guide you and keep in mind he loves all his children.”
“Thank you Pastor Dean, I have prayed to god and this is how it was answered.” I pointed to my dad. “A loving and understanding father who accepts and loves me unconditionally.” I told Pastor Dean and then looked at my dad as he blushed.
“You have a very special daughter, and you have a kind and blessed heart. May God continue to guide and protect you.”
“Thank you Pastor Dean, Sandra and I will see you next Sunday.” Dad said as he shook Pastor Dean’s hand in appreciation.
Dad and I then walked out to the car. I overheard one small girl say what a pretty dress I had on and ask if she could get one like it. She must have been nine or ten and was talking to an older female, possibly her mother. Dad started the car and we pulled out.
“Sandra, are you still planning on going to the movies with Brian?”
“Yes, of course I am. It’s still ok with you isn’t it?” I asked kind of wondering if he was truly ok with me dating Brian.
“Of course it’s ok. I just wanted to be sure, as you will have the car and I could use the time alone to think some things over while you’re on your date.” He said cryptically.
“What things?” I asked prying into things I probably shouldn’t be asking but was curious if it was about me.
“Oh just things about me, it’s nothing to do with you. Well maybe just a little, I’ll let you know what it’s about at another time ok.”
“Sure dad, I’m just worried that you might be struggling with your identity as well and I love you no matter what.”
“Don’t worry about me sweetie, I just need time to think.”
As we pulled into our driveway we were met by Brian and his mom. I felt butterflies in my stomach and my heart started to beat faster. What I feared the most was that I could not make out by the look on her face whether she was going to accept me or beat the crap out of me for making her son want to date me. I was a little apprehensive but had little choice but to get out of the car and face these fears head on. I saw Brian smile at me as I got out of the truck and I felt mildly better as I approached Mrs. Jones.
“Well I must say you are much prettier than Brian lead me to believe, so it must be true that you are embarking on is destined to happen. Turn around and let me get a proper look at you my dear.” Mrs. Jones said with a growing smile.
I spun around for her and faced her again. I was feeling ultra feminine because of the way I was dressed and the response from my fellow parishioners at the church. I was on cloud nine and no matter how this proceeded I knew I was meant to be a girl. Dad joined me in the few seconds it took to do the twirl and focus on my feelings. He put his arm around my shoulder and brought me close to him in a half hug.
“Good morning Janice, I see you are here to meet Sandra.” Dad said confidently.
“Why yes I am, Brian told me about his new girlfriend and who she is so I had to see if he was joking or serious. By looking at Sandra I can see why Brian is head over heels for her, she is quite beautiful and feminine. May we go inside for a chat?”
“Of course, I’ll make a pot of coffee and we can talk. I know Sandra is excited about her date to the movies with Brian latter so while they are away it will give us some time to chat.”
“That sounds nice; I would love a cup of coffee and chat with you David. I am sure Brian will treat Sandra like a lady.” She turned and gave a stern look at Brian. “Won’t you Brian?”
“Yes Mother, I will treat her like a princess.” Brian said like he meant it.
The four of us walked into my house as we sat on the chairs and couch in the living room I made an effort to sit next to Brian. I felt protected sitting next to him, and I was realizing how handsome he truly is. I think I might have misjudged my attraction to boys in an effort to be more masculine for my father. But that was fading away fast and I was truly feeling more feminine by the minute. Mrs. Jones sat in a chair next to my dad and spoke first.
“Well it seems you two have quite an adventure ahead of you today. A first date for both of you and the first time Brian will be out with such a pretty girl.”
I then realized Brian had not told his mom about yesterday. “That’s not completely true Mrs. Jones; Brian was with me and dad at the truck show yesterday.”
“Oh, I know all about that, what I meant was with you on a true date alone and without your father. By the way please call me Janice.”
“Ok Janice, I’m glad Brian was truthful about me and us. I don’t want any lies complicating things, in keeping with that I must tell you all that I am feeling extremely feminine and I get aroused by wearing these clothes. I’m not saying I don’t want to be a girl, I’m just stating this as not to hide anything from any of you especially you Dad.”
“The feelings you have are perfectly natural and will subside as the female hormones start to take effect in a few months.” Dad explained to me again and to Brian and Janice. “The doctor said you will continue to experience male sexual urges for a while so don’t worry about how you feel, it’s perfectly normal. I am glad you feel you can share this with me and with Janice and Brian here, it makes it easier to explain.”
“Thanks dad.” I then looked over to Janice and asked. “Janice I want to know if you are ok with Brian asking me to be his girl friend at this point. I must tell you I am still uncertain with my feelings for him, I know that I find him attractive and would not mind dating him. What I am saying is that I might want to experiment with my boy parts before I can’t use them anymore.”
“I’m happy that Brian is happy, if you find you want to experiment sexually with Brian I’m ok with it, you two are sixteen and are definitely old enough to decide for yourselves if you want to do that. I will not stand in the way of true love. Which I can see by looking into both of your eyes that this is what is happening.” She then looked over to my dad. “Don’t you think so David?”
“Absolutely, the day that Tim told me he wanted to be a girl and transformed into the beautiful Sandra sitting before us I knew that this was a definite possibility that she would date a man. What I am truly happy about is she has found a fine young and understanding man.”
Dad made all my fears melt away as soon as he finished. I felt better now about his acceptance and understanding about how I was feeling and what might happen if Brian and I date.
“Well then I am glad you two are going to the movies together. This will set the stage for future adventures for the two of you, I am confident that you will succeed in your dream of becoming a true woman and my Brian will be happy with you.” Janice said with a small tear of joy in her eye.
“Thank you mom, I know that Sandra and I will do our best to make you proud and I will be a good boyfriend to her and I will protect her no matter what transpires in the time to come.” Brian said with a smile.
“You’re too much Brian. Now I know why you’ve been my friend since we’ve known each other and I am very glad to call you my boyfriend.”
Janice, Brian, Dad and I all talked for about an hour after this. Many subjects were discussed emphasized were safe sex and what might happen when I show up at school. Brian and I listened intently to our parents discuss what we already knew about safe sex and how to use condoms. I wasn’t even thinking that far ahead but I paid attention anyways and even learned a few things. I thought it would be embarrassing discussing future sex as a woman from Janice and what to expect. She was thoughtful and very informative, I am sure I will learn much more as time goes by from my doctors and psychologists. After the earful from both our parents I took time to change into a light pink t-shirt and red shorts for the trip to the movies with Brian.
Brian and I walked out of the house and finally out of our parent’s eyesight. I drove us to the mall and parked on the theater side. Brian reached for and held my hand as we walked into the mall entrance. I felt more feminine as time passed. I wasn’t even thinking about how I would be seen as we bumped into Amy and Gina from school just inside the mall entrance. Amy is the only other person who knew of Sandra before mom passed away. She hasn’t seen me for months and I wandered how she would take it seeing me again and what she might say to Gina who didn’t know about me.
“Sandra, I haven’t seen you for ages, how are you?” Amy asked as she gave me a hug.
“I’m good, you know Brian.” I was pleased to see Amy and wondered if I should go ahead and let Gina know who I am or was.
“Oh yes, hello Brian.” She greeted Brian with a hand shake and introduced me to Gina. “Gina this is Sandra, an old friend of mine.”
“Hi Sandra it’s nice to meet you.” She shook my hand and looked me up and down. “You look familiar; do I know you from somewhere?”
“I don’t think so Gina, you just probably seen her around and now you know her.” Amy said trying to come to my rescue.
“It’s ok Amy, I can’t hide forever.” I paused to take a deep breath.
“Hide from what? Are you in trouble?” Gina Asked
“No I’m not in trouble, I’m not who you think I am, at least who I used to be.” I said with trepidation.
“What do you mean, who you used to be, are you in some sort of witness protection program?” Gina asked looking puzzled.
“No nothing like that.” I paused again. “I used to be Tim but now I’m Sandra full time.” I said with slight trepidation.
“Tim Davidson from school?” She asked with a questioning look and then gave me another once over trying to figure me out. “No way you’re too pretty to have once been a boy; you’re pulling my leg?”
“I’m afraid not Gina, what I told you is not a lie.” I looked over at Amy for confirmation.
“She’s telling you the truth Gina, I’ve known about Sandra for a long time, but never thought she would have the courage to go full time. I guess I was wrong.”
“Wow, I can’t get over how pretty you are Sandra. You seem to be more confident and more alive since I saw you last week. I will be your friend too if you like. I think it takes a lot of guts to do what you’re doing and I’ll help you if you like.”
“I would like that Gina; I’m going to need all the support from friends like you and Amy.”
“What about Brian?” Gina asked confused that I left him out.
“Well I’m counting on him too, he’s just more than a friend and I think him and I will be together a lot more.”
“Oh, um that’s cool I guess.” She said a little hesitant and looked to be thinking a bit then she smiled. “Wow Brian nice choice, she’s definitely a pretty girl; you two are a good fit.”
“Thanks Gina, I think.” Brian said looking at me with a puzzled look.
“I’m not implying anything by what I said Brian, I’m sorry if I hurt you.” She said sounding like was sorry.
Amy then changed the subject. “What are you two doing at the mall today, a bit of shopping?”
“No, Brian and I are on our first real date and he’s taking me to the movies. Which of course if you must know I drove.” I said jabbing Brian in the ribs.
“Hey that’s not fair, I can retake the test next week, there’s no need to poke fun at me because you have a license and I don’t.” He said mock pouting.
“I’m just trying to prove girls are better than guys at driving.” I said with at smile, Amy and Gina both smiled and nodded in agreement.
“What movie are you here to see, maybe Gina and I will join you if you don’t mind.”
“Brian’s taking me to see the new Chronicles of Narnia movie, you both are more that welcome to come with us.”
“That sounds good to me, what about you Gina?” Amy asked her friend.
“I would like that, let’s go.”
The four of us went to the theater and got our tickets, Brian bought mine. We also grabbed some popcorn and drinks on the way in. The movie was great and I felt closer to Brian as time went on. He held my hand through most of the film and I did not mind at all. It was actually quite nice. After the movie stopped the four of us met outside. This was the first time I needed to use a public bathroom since this all began. I asked Amy for a little support.
“Amy I need to use the bathroom, can you go with me?” I asked a little hesitant wondering if I should hold it till I got home, but my bladder was telling me otherwise.
“Sure we girls need to stick together.” Amy followed me into forbidden territory as I felt a little flush as I entered the much cleaner than the boys room I remember. Amy then whispered into my ear. “Just remember to sit.”
I gave Amy a quick smile of understanding, went into the stall, sat and did my business making sure to use paper and flush. I then came out of the stall and washed my hands. Amy joined me in the same then pulled a stick of lipstick out of her purse and touched up her lips. I followed suit and did the same, Gina came out of the last stall as we finished. I was about to leave when Amy stopped me.
“We came in together, we stick together girl, don’t forget that.”
“Thanks Amy, I won’t forget.”
With that completed and me feeling a whole lot better about my day, the four of us walked out of the mall and parted ways. I said goodbye to Gina and Amy with a half hug to each of them and gave Gina my number. Brain and I climbed into my car and I drove us home. On the way Brian was a little quiet and I asked what was up.
“You ok Brian, you sure are quiet?”
“Oh it’s nothing Sandra, I was just thinking about how nice of a time I had with you. I did have a wonderful time with you today.”
“Thanks, I did too. It sure was nice to meet a new friend too.”
“Yah, that was nice of Gina to be ok with you.”
“I like her, she’s a nice person and I think she will support us at school along with Amy.” I said with assurance.
“I think your right, at least I hope so.”
I pulled the car into the driveway and we got out. Brian offered his arm and escorted me to the porch. He seemed a little apprehensive as what to do next so I eased his fears, leaned in, closed my eyes and kissed him on the lips. I then just melted into his arms and let it happen. It lasted about thirty seconds but might have well been an eternity. It was nice, no it was great. Brian slowly broke the kiss looked at me with puppy dog eyes.
“Wow Sandra, that was great.”
“Yah, I thought so too. I would definitely like to do that again.”
“Me too.”
We then pressed our lips together once again. I took this time to experience his lips more closely. It was much better this time nothing holding either of us back. We then broke the kiss once again after about a minute.
“That was much better than the first time Brian, and I am happy you are my boyfriend.”
“I am happy to Sandra, I love you very much.”
“I love you too Brian.
We hugged each other before departing our separate ways. Brian gave me a small peck on the cheek as he left.
“I’ll see you in the morning Sandra.” Brian said as he looked to be walking on air as he strolled home.
I closed the front door by leaning on it with my back; I then sunk to the floor with my knees up and swooned from all those wonderful feelings of the day. I quickly recovered when I heard my dad walk up.
“Have a good time on your date sweetheart?”
“It was wonderful dad; I had a great time and met a nice new girlfriend of Amy’s too.”
“That’s nice, I’m glad you were able to have a good time and meet new people as the new you. Janice and I talked a lot about you and Brian while you were at the movies. She would like to be included in your transition, a feminine fill-in when and if you need it. She said she’s not trying to take your mothers place, but she is willing to help you along if you should ever want it.” Dad said with a smile on his face. I could tell dad liked her and maybe he was attracted to her, Janice had been a widow since Brian was a baby. Maybe, just maybe I thought to myself.
“Well I’m tired and I’ve already eaten plenty at the theater. Besides I need to plan my outfit for tomorrow.” I said with a grin.
“Ok, you have a good night.”
“Good night dad.” I said then went off to my room.
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Sandra returns to school as her new self; full of confidence but with a little fear of what might happen. Will Sandra be accepted or hated and what will happen if she runs into Kevin Chambers (the school bully) is feeding the fear. Things get a bit dicey in this chapter, therefore is now for more mature audiences. Chapter six By Sara D. |
“Good morning dad.” I said cheerfully.
“Good morning sweetie, you look nice.” Dad responded, just a tad tired looking. “Don’t forget Mrs. Sherman wanted to see you before classes today.”
“I know dad, don’t worry I’ll be fine.” Daddy can be such a worrywart sometimes. “Brian is walking me to school.”
“Sandra; now if have any trouble you call me immediately. Understood young lady?” He said a little brazen.
“Yes sir, Daddy…” I said with emphasis and puppy dog eyes.
“That look had no effect on me first thing in the morning missy. Now off to school with you.” He then swatted me on the butt playfully as I tried to escape from him to school.
“See you after school dad.” I said trying to get the last word in. “Love yah.”
“Love you more pumpkin.” Dad said with a smile.
I then walked out of the house with my books in my bag and met up with Brian who was waiting on the porch.
“Good morning Sandy.” He said brightly.
“Good morning to you to Brian, ready to come to my rescue if need be?” I said in my best helpless demeanor.
“Of course, I will be your knight in shining armor.” He knew as well as I did, we were not the most popular or physically skilled people in school. I mean we got by with playing sports and stuff but you know the drill, we were more into books, good grades and computers.
We walked the rest of the way to school chatting about our upcoming spring dance and who we thought would go together. I was never planning on going to what I thought was a stupid dance. Truth be told I never thought I would have the courage to ask someone. Brian was ever the gentleman and asked me to go with him.
“Um…Sandy…Um will you go with me….Please?” He asked obviously unsure of how I would answer.
I turned red and thought for a second; seeing he had a worried look on his face I made my answer. “Yes, I will go with you.” I then gave him a hug.
“That’s great Sandy, you and I will have a wonderful time. Hopefully I will have my license by then that way I can drive you for a change.”
“That will be the day, and you know what, I will help you study for the test. When are you up for it again?” I asked knowing full well it was this week.
“I have an appointment on Wednesday after school. I’ve already studied till my brain hurts. Hey you could quiz me later, after school.”
“Ok, it’s a date then.”
We shortly arrived at school; I was feeling a bit apprehensive about what might happen. Then I remembered what mom had told me. ‘Hold you head high and be proud’. So that’s what I did. Brian was a help too. He gave my hand a squeeze as we entered the main hall and walked towards the principal’s office. There were only a few others milling about as it was still quite early. I had at least another 45 minutes till the first bell rang.
I gave Brian a hug as I went into the office and checked in with the secretary Ms. James. He wished me luck as I went in. I walked up to Ms. James who had a bright smile she handed me a clipboard and I signed in. She took the clipboard and looked at my name and smiled again.
“Mrs. Sherman is expecting you Sandra, might I say you make a lovely young girl.” She said brightly. “You may go in.”
“Thank you Ms. James.” I could not help but smile back at her. Mrs. Sherman must have spoken with my teachers and staff over the weekend.
“Come in my dear.” Mrs. Sherman said as I peeked into her office. “Please have a seat and we will chat before first period.”
“Thank you Mrs. Sherman I’m sure today will bring new experiences.”
“Yes, of that I am sure of; you are an exceptional student and young woman. What you have chosen for yourself is a hard and long road. We here at Yellowstone High will not stand in your way, the staff here are committed to your safety and well being.” She said in a motherly way and with compassion.
“That is good to hear Mrs. Sherman; I am still a bit nervous about running into Kevin Chambers.”
“Well just steer clear of him as much as possible but if you should need any help, all the teachers here have been briefed on your situation and are instructed to help when the need arrives. I’m sure you just have jitters. What I really wanted to talk to you about is important also. I want to maintain the dignity of this school and all the rest of the students here. What I am saying is that while you’re at school you’re allowed to use the female restrooms and facilities required for Gym. But I must make myself clear that you must maintain modesty and not let your secret out. And if at any time I find you are enjoying your time with the other girls I will put that to a stop immediately and expel you. I want you and the other students to have a place for learning.” She said sternly making her point.
“I understand completely Mrs. Sherman, I’m not doing this on a lark or to get into those places to see the girls, I am a girl on the inside and I’m on the way to change the outside to match.”
“Of that I am sure; I’m required by the school district to outline the rules that apply to students with a status such as yours. I’ve also read the letter from Dr. Louis and she has confirmed that you are in a real life test and are living as a female. You should also know that we as a school have been aware of your desire for a while. Your mother, god rest her sole, wrote me a letter explaining that in the future you may want to live as a woman and sent it to me to prepare for that day. I will give you a copy of the letter if you like. It’s a nice read I recommend you read it.”
“Thank you Mrs. Sherman, I will do as you ask and I will make you and the school proud. I won’t let my grades slide and I will continue to excel in all my classes. I have friends that already know about me and have pledged to come to my aid if needed, but I don’t think I will need it.” I told her confidently.
“That’s good to know.” She opened a drawer and pulled out an envelope, stood up and motioned for me to follow her out of the office. “In this envelope is the letter your mom sent me, I think it will help you understand her more.” She then handed the letter to Ms. James. “Emily will you make a copy of this letter and give the copy to Sandra.”
“Yes of course, just a sec.” She said cheerfully and made a copy of the letter, then she folded original and put it into an envelope and handed it Sandra.
“Thank you Ms. James, I’ll read it later.” I said anxious to read the letter.
“You’re welcome, and it was a pleasure to meet you Sandra.”
“Have a good day Sandra, come by anytime to just talk if you need to.” Mrs. Sherman told me.
“I will, and thank you again.”
I walked out of the office into the main hall with my head held high and a new confidence. I felt like nothing could stop me from achieving my goal. Brian was waiting patiently for me to appear. When I met his gaze he gave me the brightest smile yet. God he’s cute, now I know why I’m falling for him.
“How’d it go?”
“Ok, Mrs. Sherman just wanted to make sure I was aware of the rules for me and using the female facilities and said I was welcome at school and she was available to talk to.”
“Well that’s good; it’s almost time for first period so I’ll see you at lunch.”
“Thanks for everything so far Brian, see you at lunch.”
“Good luck Sandy.” Brian said as he walked away. I clenched the letter Mrs. Sherman had said was from my mom, I then carefully put the letter away for later reading.
I slowly walked down the corridor to my first class which is Math. I sat at my regular seat and watched for reactions of the others as they came rushing in as the bell rang for the class to start. To my surprise no one gave me a second look, except one boy who looked at me and smiled. My fears were slowly fading as the class went on.
This experience was the same for the next three classes up English were Ms. Landers gave me a smile and whispered in my ear. “Good luck sweetie, if you need anything just ask me.” Now I know why she’s my favorite teacher. I took my normal seat and Amy took hers next to me.
“How’s your day going Sandy?” Amy asked as she pulled out her English paper.
“Good, no one has really said anything yet today. It’s just been a normal day.” I answered kind of surprised by the reaction, well lack of one so far.
“That’s good, you want company for lunch?”
“Sure I’d like that. Oh yah, guess who asked me to the spring dance?”
Amy gave me a knowing look and smile as if she had to guess. “Brian for sure, it’s not that much of a stretch to guess he would ask you. He’s head over heels in love with you Sandy. I’ve never known him to be in such a good mood since the real you arrived.”
“Thanks Amy, I am sure lucky to have a boyfriend such as him. And I know that he and I will be together for a long time and that I love him as well.” I truthfully told Amy, we were then interrupted by Ms. Landers.
“Girls!” She said sternly. “It’s time for class to begin.”
“Sorry Ms. Landers.” Amy and I said at the same time, looked at each other and laughed that we did that.
At lunch Brian, Amy, Gina and I sat and had a boisterous chat. We talked about all sorts of things, of course the two top topics were the so far non-reaction of other students, and in fact I had a few comments like. ‘It’s about time she dressed like a girl.’ One boy said in the hall in passing. I even walked past the well known school bully and thorn in our side for years, Kevin Chambers with no reaction. It’s been a good day so far. The second topic was what we girls would wear to the dance. Of course I had just the dress in mind, the white one from yesterday. Amy and Gina said I would look beautiful in anything, as they had not seen me in it yet.
“Sandy, you looked gorgeous in that yesterday.” Brian said then blushed.
“Thanks Brian.” I was equally embarrassed at the comment. He thought I looked gorgeous; he’s quickly earning more points. “You would look nice in a Tux. Think your mom would get you one?” I asked the stuck out my tongue at him.
“For a date with you, I am sure she would.”
“That would be cool; I could get Matt to get one too.” Amy smiled, Matt is her boyfriend and he’s pretty cool. In fact I haven’t seen him yet today. “Oh here he is.” With that Matt sat next to Amy and gave her a peck on the cheek.
“Hi Amy.” Then nodded at Gina and Brian then looked at me trying to figure me out, then asked. “Who are you, are you new here?”
“No silly, Sandra’s been going here for a long time.” Amy said before I could answer.
“She has? I don’t remember seeing her before today.” Matt said confused.
“Well before today you haven’t seen her, she was someone else.” Amy continued.
“Someone else, what do you mean, who?” He was still confused and I could tell.
“Matt, I used to be Tim, but now I’m Sandra full time.”
“Oh, ok that cool, nice to meet you Sandra.” Matt said as he shook my hand in a friendly manner. I was stunned, that was it. No reaction other than that’s cool. I was expecting to get bludgeoned to death once people started to realize who I used to be.
He must have seen my confusion at his reaction.
“Don’t worry Sandra, while I don’t understand why you would want to be a girl, it’s none of my business and I won’t let on that I know who you used to be.”
“Thanks Matt.” I said truly grateful, Amy must have felt the same way as she just given him a kiss on the lips.
“You’re a great boyfriend Matt; I love you for being you.” Amy said with glassy eyes. “We’ve been talking about the spring dance and what we’re going to wear. Would you be willing to get a tuxedo? Brian’s going to wear one with Sandy.”
“Um… Sure, that would be kind of neat.” He then must have realized what Amy had implied by saying Brian and me. “Brian um…you’re going with Sandra?” He said with a strange hard to guess look.
“Yes Matt, I am. She is my girlfriend so why not.”
“Oh, ok. You’re getting Paul to wear a tux Gina?” I think he wanted to change the subject as I’m sure he did not know how to respond to the realization of Brian and I being a couple.
Gina piped in. “Of course, he will have little choice once I tell Paul.”
“Tell me what Gina?” Paul said as he sat next to her.
“That you’re wearing a tuxedo to the spring dance with me and the rest of us.” Gina said as an order to Paul.
“Ok Gina, but if I’m going to wear a tux to the dance I want to get a kiss afterwards.”
“It’s a deal.” Gina said with a smile.
I was listening intently on how these two girls had their boys twisted around their fingers and was learning quickly the power we girls had over our men. I was enjoying how easily the boys had agreed to wear tuxedos to the spring dance which was traditionally a casual dance. I am sure in short order the rest of the girls in the school would learn of our plan and that the dance would soon be a very formal function.
It did not take long for Paul to get a funny look on his face when he looked at me in recognition shortly after agreeing to Gina’s ploy.
“Hey, I know you from somewhere.” He said to me.
I sighed and took a deep breath to explain things again but did have to again. But this time Matt came to my rescue and retold what we had already talked about. Once he was convinced he just sort of shrugged as in a ‘whatever’ attitude and continued to take a bite out of the burger he had been eating.
“You’re not angry or feeling weird about me?” I asked puzzled once again.
“Nah, it doesn’t bother me one bit. I think it’s courageous you have the balls to dress as a girl at school. You look good as a girl by the way.”
Gina got a huge smile on her face and she too gave her boyfriend a kiss in thanks. “You’re the best, you know that don’t you.”
“Thanks Gina, if she’s your friend then she is my friend. What’s your name by the way?”
“Sandra, but you can call me Sandy. All my true friends call me that.”
“It’s nice to meet you Sandy.” He said with a smile and hand shake.
We then continued talking about the dance like normal teenagers and then went on about nothing in particular until the bell rang to go to fifth period. The rest of the day went uneventful. I thought my first day at school would have been a night mare but was just a normal day for me. Even changing for Gym was not a problem with the other girls. I didn’t even take a second look at any of them as I changed inside my cubical. Like Mrs. Sherman had told me to do.
After grabbing the letter Mrs. Sherman has given me I left walked out of school and I met up with Brian at the entrance to the school.
“How was the rest of your day?” Brain asked interested.
“It was good, I’m just surprised that no one really cared or did not realize who I used to be. Especially Matt and Paul they are a trip and nice.
“Well I hope you don’t think they’re cute, I might get jealous.” He said with a look that would kill.
“Don’t worry you’re the only man for me.” I said then did the unexpected thing. I kissed him on the lips and melted into him completely. After a few exciting minutes we broke the kiss and held hands all the way home. As we stood staring at each other on my porch, Brian finally found his voice again.
“I love you Sandra, I can’t wait till the dance. I am truly excited about it, more of what might happen afterwards.” Brian said implying a possible sexual encounter after the spring dance.
“We will cross that bridge when the time comes Brian, I am still unsure if I want to do that yet.” I said out loud but immediately began thinking about what is would be like to be with him that way, to actually experience oral sex with him came to mind. Would I do that to him I’ll have to think about that later.
“I know Sandy; you can’t fault a boy for dreaming can you?” Brian said hopefully.
“No I guess not.” I answered honestly.
“Sandy I just want to be honest with you; I would love nothing more than to experience sex with you before you decide to change things down there.” He said glancing at my crotch.
“Well to be truthful with you, I haven’t figured if that’s the way I want to go fully. I know I’m a girl, but I might decide I want to keep my boy parts but still be a girl. I know it’s hard to comprehend but that is how I feel right now.”
“I love you Sandra Davidson.” Brian said as he gave me a big hug then kissed me more deeply than before. I once again melted into him and swooned in the pleasure and passion of the kiss. I could not help but feel true love for Brian, and my boy parts were in full agreement and starting to make its approval known. I broke the kiss because I knew Brian had to have felt that.
“Sorry for that Brian, I can’t control it.” I said still holding my hands around his neck.
“It’s perfectly ok Sandy, its part of you and it natural. And part of why I love you so much.
“Thank you Brian, I should get going and get to my home work.” I said trying to get alone so I could think and read mom’s letter.
“Ok Sandy, I’ll see you in the morning.” Brian then kissed my lightly on the lips as he left to go home.
I gathered myself up and walked into my bedroom and closed the door. I needed some privacy and time to think. Being a teenager I was thinking about what Brain had said and I was wondering what it would feel like to give Brian oral sex. I began to get excited the more I thought about it, I had to pull my pants and panties off to release the pressure building down below. I once again had to use my favorite towel to clean up the mess one I was done. I knew at this moment that I would never want to rid myself of my favorite new toy. It was too pleasurable to get rid of. I knew I wanted to be a girl, just now I would be a girl with extra parts, who knew.
Once I regained my composure, I pulled out the letter and began reading.
Dear Principal Sherman,
Bridget, as you know my son Tim attends your school in the 10th grade. He is an above average student pulling a 3.5 GPA and has good friends. Why you ask am I writing you. Well here is why. Recently I became ill and found it hard to concentrate and do daily tasks and simple house chores. After a long round of test at the hospital I was diagnosed with cancer and was given only a few months to live. I, along with my loving husband David, and Tim, were devastated, to say the least. I knew something was wrong as soon as the doctor walked in. The horror on David’s and Tim’s face made my heart hurt more than you can imagine. They were just told they would lose their wife and mother. I don’t want to die, and as a Christian I knew I would be ok in the house of the lord. But I was still sad. It’s been hard this last month, back and forth from home to stays in the hospital has been stressful financially and emotionally. I’ve been considerably weaker and been in the hospital for a week now, the doctors say I will not be able to go home. David’s wants me to pass at home, but doesn’t think Tim could handle seeing his mother fade away to the ultimate death.
As a mother of a son you know how hard it is to relate to your son, as I have relating to my dear son. I know my death will leave a whole in his and my husband’s lives. I know that David will take care of my son; he is a great husband and understanding and compassionate father. I was truly blessed to have met and finally marry him. He is my will always be my friend and lover. So you know that Tim and David will ultimately be ok.
What I am writing to you for is to give you my written permission for Tim to attend school as a girl named Sandra when she decides to come out of her shell. It was certainly hard to relate to my son, but the day I caught Tim in my underwear I met my daughter for the first time. My 12 year old son was standing looking at himself in the mirror admiring how he, no, she looked while wearing my undergarments - a simple pair of cotton panties and bra. They were obviously too big for her and she really needed something that fit. I could not help but smile, so much like her father, but with a small difference. This one was a true girl on the inside. I could tell immediately that she was different from my husband’s cross dressing. The look on her face, and stance was much different than what I had experience with David. Yes David used to cross dress when we were first married. I thought it was a hoot and loved it. We were soon given the happy news of my pregnancy and David and I decided that his dressing would stop. Time passed and David and I loved Tim with all our hearts, even given the obvious fact that she was effeminate at a very young age. David always told me that Tim would find himself and not to worry that he would love our son no matter what.
Well I walked up to Tim and startled him when I asked. “Would you like help?” I think he would rather have been caught stealing then being caught as he did. This experience ultimately leads to the frequent dressing as a girl over the next four years. I even taught my new daughter how to do make up and how to act and present herself. Tim had asked me not to reveal our little secret to his father and I promised I would not. I don’t know why Sandy was afraid to tell his father, he would be ok with it. I will try and find time to talk to David before it’s too late.
Well now you know that Sandra will need a helping hand and to experience life as she was meant to. She’s at a vulnerable stage and will be sixteen soon. She has a friend at school named Amy and she has been friends with Sandra for a while, but she will need yours and the rest of the staff’s help too. If Sandra does not come out of her shell a few months after I am gone, will you help her.
Thank you Bridget, you’re a good friend and I know you will help. Give this letter to Sandra when it’s right. With all my love, God bless you.
Claudia Davidson.
P. S.
Sandra, if you’re reading this, I am sorry I had to leave. You are now who you were meant to be. I love you Sandra. LOVE MOM.
I put the letter down and started to cry, I missed my mom dearly and this letter held a connection to her. It also explained a few things and let me know it was ok to be Sandra and that I was going to be ok. And no matter what she and dad loved me. I don’t know how long I cried but they were tears of joy and sadness at the same time. I soon heard the sound of the front door closing as dad got home. I quickly wiped my eyes off and regained my composer again and went out to meet dad. I just wanted to hug him, and I did as we ran into each other in the hall.
“What’s the matter sweetie, tough day at school?” He said with a look of concern.
“No, Mrs. Sherman gave me this letter mom had written to her a week before she died.” I said with a few more tears and handed the letter to dad.
Dad led me to the living room where we sat down and dad read the letter. I stared at his face the whole time to get any tell tale signs of how he was taking it. When he finished he put it down and gave me a hug.
“It was a nice letter, your mother loved us both very much and I miss her too. This does explain why Mrs. Sherman was so accepting when I called and told her you were attending school as a girl.”
We then just sat and comforted each other for a while. I then remembered that Brian has asked me to the spring dance.
“Um dad, would it be ok if Brian and I go to the spring dance together in two weeks.” I asked a little apprehensive.
“Of course you can go on a date with Brian; he is your boyfriend right?” Dad said with a snicker. “I would not expect you not to go. You are sixteen and able to date anyone you want. Just be careful sweetie and have fun, what are you planning on wearing?”
“The dress from yesterday, Amy and Gina and I are getting the guys to wear tuxedos to the dance. We’re going to set a trend and make this a formal dance.”
“I see you’ve learned to manipulate your boyfriend. A skill worth any good woman, a skill your mother had in quantity and I loved her for it.”
“Thanks dad, I have some homework to do, then bed. I’ll see you in the morning.” I then gave him another hug, just for being a great dad. I spent the next hour or so working on my English and math assignments then fell asleep soon after.
I woke the next morning well rested and ready for a new day, I found that dad had put mom’s letter on my dresser. He must have done that after I fell asleep. I folded it neatly and put it back in the envelope Ms. James had given me. I then felt ultra feminine today and I put on a nice auburn v-neck top, and black cotton skirt that came up to the tops of my knees, not overly short but extremely feminine especially with the jet black nylons and my new black pumps on. I gave dad a hug and said good bye on my way out. As always Brian was waiting for me on the porch. As our eye met I thought his eyes would pop out of his head.
“Good morning beautiful.” Brian almost exasperating in excitement, he was truly looking to be taken aback by my choice of attire today. “You look great Sandy.”
“Thank you Brian, I feel extremely feminine today and want to show it.”
“Well you pull it off nicely.” Brian said as a compliment and I was not going to argue.
About half way to school I broke our conversation about nothing and let the cat out of the bag about how I felt about my boy parts.
“Brian I’ve decided that I don’t want to change things down below, I want to keep my penis but I still want to present myself as a girl and to look like one as much as possible. The hormone I’m on will take care of that, by this time next year I’ll have breasts and my penis will probably become smaller, but it will still work. I thought it would not be fair unless I told you this. I haven’t told my dad or my therapist yet. I’ll tell dad tonight and Dr. Louis on Thursday during our next session.”
“That’s wonderful news Sandra, I can’t be happier. I mean if you had surgery to become a girl for real I would still love you. But knowing I will still have you as you are is exciting. If you know what I mean, sorry it’s just I’ve been fantasizing about you for ages and now that you have made this decision I am elated.” Brian said truthfully.
We arrived at school, once there we ran into Gina, Paul, Amy and Matt.
“Wow Sandra you look hot today.” Matt said as we walked up then fell back a foot as Amy elbowed him in the ribs.
“Matt I’m the only girl for you, and you better not try and get anywhere near Sandy.” She said in mock jealousy.
“No worries here Amy, I’m not interested in Matt. For me it’s all Brian.”
“Well that’s good, you do look nice today.” Amy finally admitted.
“Thanks.” That’s when the first bell rang and we were all of to class. The day went just like yesterday. I was just another girl at school, just one who had finally come out of her tomboy stage and decided to dress like a girl. I gathered that from a few more overheard comments from a few boys and girls I ran into throughout the day. I couldn’t be happier and was having a wonderful time. Mrs. Sherman commented on my attire and said I looked nice and even Mr. Thompson the Gym teacher said I was a nice looking girl, he being ultra masculine and known for his view on gays. I was surprised that the reaction was so mild and I found myself relaxed and falling into a normal teenage girl day. After great lunch with all my friends and Brian I was walking with my head held high. My day could not get better, I was elated and the clothes I had chosen for today enhanced the feeling. No one could ruin my day.
I was on my way down the hall after visiting the girl’s room after lunch. I was opening my locker to get my books out for my next class when I all of a sudden I heard from the school bully Kevin Chambers and my stomach turned over into knots.
“WHY YOU FUCKING FAGGOT, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING. YOU FUCKING PEACE OF SHIT HOMO.”
Then I heard Brian say in the distance.
“KEVIN, YOU BASTARD NO!!!!!!!!”
Then everything went dark as I felt a sharp pain in the back of my head.
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The long awaited return of Sandra and her friends. Find out what happened and how things change for Sandra and how this attack affects the perpetrator. Chapter Seven By Sara D. |
“Oh thank God you’re ok; you were kicked in the head by that rat bastard Kevin. He got his though.” Brian said looking pissed off and then happy I was conscious.
As the fuzziness continued to wear off, I began to hear the driver in the front making calls on the radio, about my condition. I heard the following which made no sense to me.
“Inbound one female juvenile, sixteen with a contusion and a two inch laceration to the anterior portion of the lower head and neck area, unconscious for five minutes, on line with fluids and 10 CC’s.”
I could not understand the rest; I was now looking over at Brian who still had a worried look on his face.
“My head hurts.” I squeaked out then heard the guy in the back with us tell the driver my condition up date.
“She’s conscious.”
“That is good to hear.” The driver responded.
“What happened after I blacked out?” I asked Brian who was still squeezing my hand, he did not have time to answer because the ambulance stopped and I was quickly wheeled out and was hurried into an examination room where a bunch of people in white coats and smocks were waiting to examine me.
I presumed the man in the white coat was the doctor as he began looking in my eyes with a light. He looked at the monitors hooked up to me and then took a gauze bandage to the back of my head. After a few minutes he sighed in relief and explains to the others my condition.
“It looks as if we have a very lucky young lady here, but just to be sure I want a CT scan of her skull and then get a local and stitch up the cut in the back of her head. It does not look to bad and will probably heal with a very small scar. How do you feel young lady?”
“A little out of it, my head hurts and my vision was blurry when I woke up in the ambulance.” I said feeling a little scared I might be hurt more on the inside. “You’re sure I’m ok.”
“Yes, I just want to rule out the possibly of brain injury but you do have a slight concussion, and will need stitches in the cut on your neck, most likely two or three will do, it’s not that bad of a cut.”
“What’s a concussion doctor?” I asked not knowing what it meant.
“That means your brain is bruised and it will clear up in a few days to a week. I will send a letter requesting you not participate in any physical activity for the rest of the week and will see you next week to take the stitches out and follow up on you then. Does that sound ok?”
“Yes, thank you, Doctor?”
“Sorry, I’m Doctor Jenson a Pediatric resident here at Mercy hospital.
“Thanks for taking care of Sandra.” Brian said.
“That’s my job, take care of the injured and cure their ails.” Dr. Jenson said chuckling. “Are you Sandra’s boyfriend? I heard you’re the one who fought off the bully who attacked her?”
“Yes I’m her boyfriend, and yes I took care of that bully, and good I hope.”
“I heard he’s ok, just a broken spirit and bloody nose from what the school nurse has told the police.”
“Police, Brian’s not in trouble is he?” I asked concerned for Brian.
“That’s something he will have to ask the investigating officer. He’s waiting outside in the hall for you, if you would like Brian I’ll tell him your waiting for Sandra’s test results and will be out in a while.”
“Thanks Doctor, I’d like that.”
With that the Dr. Jenson walk out and spoke to the tall black officer in the hall, the officer smiled and nodded an affirmative and Dr. Jenson walked back in the examination room and was soon followed by a large piece of equipment being pushed into the room by a large guy in scrubs and an ID that read D. Jones, Orderly.
“Ok, the portable CT scanner is here so I’ll go ahead and get that out of the way, thank you Rick.” Dr. Jenson said to the big balding man.
“No problem Frank.” The orderly said and walked out.
Dr. Jenson the pushed it the rest of the way over to the bed I had been lying on and had me lay down and then turned on the machine. It made a low buzzing sound for a few minutes then Dr. Jenson turned off the scanner an pushed it into the far right corner of the exam room. He then sat at a computer terminal and brought up what could only be pictures of the inside of my head. He studied several images for a few minutes then stood up and came over to the side of the bed.
“Your scans are clear of any damaged, just a small bit of bruising from a mild concussion. You’ll have to stay in the hospital overnight for observation, but you will be able to go home tomorrow afternoon. Your principal Mrs. Sherman has informed me she has contacted your father and he’s on his way here.”
“Thank you.” I said relieved dad was coming to the hospital. A second later a short and skinny female nurse walked in with a tray and syringe and set the tray on the table next to the bed.
“Brian you can go out and speak to Officer Thompson while the nurse tends to Sandra’s stitches.” Dr. Jenson led Brian out to the corridor while I had stitches put in.
Once the nurse used the syringe, the area around the wound became numb and all I felt was a slight tug as she did the stitches. The nurse, Betty, finished in just a few minutes.”
“There we go, all finished. I was able to close the cut with just two stitches and used glue on the rest. It’ll heal nicely and most likely not leave a scar, and if it does it will be small and hidden by your hair.”
“Thank you nurse, will it hurt?”
“Call my Betty; it will be sore for a few days. Just keep it clean and covered until the stitches are removed. You’re a very pretty girl, how old are you?” Betty said sweetly
“I’m 16 Betty, and a sophomore in high school.” I answered.
“Is that cute boy in the hall your boyfriend?” Betty continued to talk as she tapped a bandage on the wound.
“Yes, that’s Brian, my knight in shining armor; apparently he stopped the boy who kicked me from doing anything else.” I told her very proud of him.
“Do you know why that boy did this to you?” She asked innocently unaware of my secret.
“Yah, I think it’s because I used to be a boy.” I told her a bit scared of what she might think.
“Oh, well I guess he’s just another boy not secure with his own manhood.” She said calmly and unaffected.
“You don’t mind?” I asked confused.
“No not at all, in fact my sister was just like you and has grown up to be a very special sister and friend.” Betty said with a grin. “I’ll give you her email and maybe you can talk to her if you like.”
“That would be great, thank you.” I said excited about talking with another person who had already gone through what I am.
“I’ll be back with her business card in a few minutes; it’s just in my locker down the hall.” Betty then left and Brian and the police officer walked in right as she left.
“Hello Ms. Davidson, I’m Officer Thompson and I’m investigating the attack on you at school today and I have a few questions to ask you.” He asked gently.
“Go ahead Officer Thompson; I’m ready to answer any questions you may have.” I was wondering how I could help I really did not see anything.
“Ok Ms. Davidson, at any time in the past few days did you at any time do anything that might be construed as flirting or inappropriate touching to Kevin Chambers?”
“Absolutely not Officer, I haven’t even spoken to him in at least a week.” I said a little mad at the question.
“Ok, calm down Ms. Davidson, I just need to get all the info from everyone involved and I’m not pointing fingers of blame at you.” Officer Thompson said in a calming tone.
“Sorry, Officer Thompson, but I am still a bit fuzzy and I did nothing to deserve this attack.”
“I realize that, you’re too lovely a young lady as far as I have seen and heard from many people at your school.” He said with a smile. “You have a lot of good friends and teachers who came to your aid and defended your honor when Kevin started spreading that you not only flirted with him, but you also exposed yourself to him in a sexual manner.”
I turned beet red in anger at such an outlandish lie. “How could he say such a thing, I was just getting my next class books out of my locker when I heard that piece of shit yell then the next thing I know I’m in an ambulance. No way is that horse’s ass going to get away with telling lies. What a piece of shit.” I almost screamed in anger, I don’t even remember ever being this angry before. I’ve always been passive and shy up till now.
“It’s ok to be angry Ms. Davidson, from what Brian and the other witnesses have told me this was a total unprovoked attack and that the perpetrator will be dealt with. I’m going to speak to his father once I’ve completed my interview with you.”
“Please call me Sandra, and thank you.”
“You are welcome.” His smile then turned to a frown. “I sorry but I have to ask you this final question, part of what Kevin was spreading at school after this incident was that just a few days ago you used to be a boy. All I see in front of me is a very nice girl, but does this rumor have any truth to it? He asked gently.
I started to wonder if I was in some sort of trouble for becoming a full time girl. I began to worry I might have to go back to being a boy, no way that was happening. I’m a girl now and no way is someone going to force me to change who I am. Officer Thompson must have seen the unhappy expression on my face.
“Look Sandra, not that it matters one way or another, but I am obligated to get the facts in this case. It will have no bearing on you and will only be used against your attacker in such cases that involve discrimination against persons in your alleged situation.”
“Yes it is true I was once a boy. I am a girl now and no one is going to tell me otherwise.” I said still a frustrated about what happen and what might happen when I return to school in a few days.
“Thank you for your honesty Sandra, It will indeed help if this incident goes to court. It’s up to you, as I said I will be contacting Mr. Chambers in a few minutes. At that time I will come back and discuss what might happen next. I’ll return shortly and once again thank you Ms. Davison.”
“You’re welcome Officer Thompson; I just hope that piece of shit Kevin get what he deserves.” I said still feeling hurt and angry at my attacker as Officer Thompson walked out the shaking his head.
“Watch your language young lady.”
“Daddy!!” I squealed my father walked in with an expression of worry that changed to a smile once he realized I was ok. My head hurt as I sprang up from the bed and jumped to my feet to hug him and I wobbled a bit.
“Careful Sandra, I don’t want to be the one who causes you to get hurt more.” Dad said with a smirk.
“Oh Daddy, I’m fine. The doctor said I can go back to school on Thursday, but I have to stay overnight for observation.” I told him trying to be smarter than him.
“I know sweetie, I just spoke with Dr. Jenson. He told me you’re a very lucky girl.” Dad gave me a big hug then turned to Brian. “I understand I owe you a great debt of gratitude young man for saving Sandra from a severe beating. You sir have my thanks and eternal appreciation, and Sandra is very fortunate to have a boyfriend like you Brian. You’re mother will be very proud of your actions today, and I will be sure to tell her how I feel about it.”
Brian could not help but turn red in embarrassment. “Thank you Mr. Davidson, I just reacted to protect the girl I love. I would not know what I would do if I had lost her. She’s my best friend and girlfriend in the world.” Brian said and smiled at me.
“I love you Brian.” I let slip out and gave him a kiss on the lips. We held it just for a few seconds and then were interrupted by the door opening and Officer Thompson came back in.
“Hello, I’m Officer Ben Thompson you must be Mr. Davidson.” The policeman said as he shook dad’s hand.
“Why yes I am, are you going to arrest the person responsible for this unprovoked attack?” Dad asked sternly.
“If I may sir may I speak to you outside regarding that point?” Officer Thompson asked and gestured to the corridor just outside my room.
Once they left the room I could see Dad and Officer Thompson talking through the glass in the door to the room. It looked like a civil conversation and not heated. I could see my dad nod his head from time to time in the affirmative. I began wondering what they were talking about; I did not have to wait long because they both came back in a few seconds later.
Dad came up to me and put his hand on my shoulder in a comforting manner. “Sandy, Officer Thompson has spoken with Mr. Chambers, Kevin’s dad about this. His initial reaction was one of shock and embarrassment. He said he is truly sorry for what his son has done to you. He has requested to meet with you and me to discuss alternative punishment other than arrest. He does say he will support whatever decision you make.” Dad said then squeezed my shoulder for support.
“Ok Dad, I’ll meet Mr. Chambers and talk with him. I’ll certainly hear what he has to say then make a decision then.” I told him a bit apprehensive.
“That’s very grown up of you Sandra, you must be very proud of your daughter Mr. Davidson.” Officer Thompson said.
“Yes I am very proud of Sandra; she is a very responsible and tender young lady.” Dad said then smiled at me.
“Mr. Chambers said he could be here in about an hour, he said something about needing to take care of his son first then he will meet with you here.” Officer Thompson explained.
“Thank you Ben.” Officer Thompson shook dad’s hand then left to wait somewhere for Mr. Chambers to show up.
“Honey, you should get some rest and Brian and I will go and see if we can fetch you something to eat.”
“Ok dad that sounds nice, I’d like some ice cream too.” I said greedily knowing I would get what I wanted.
“Of course your majesty, you ask and you shall receive.” Dad said jokingly. “Come on Brian let ‘Princess Sandra’ rest while us men fetch her some food.”
“Yes sir.” Brian continued. “My lady.” Brian said bowing as he exited the room. I’ll have to get him back for that one for sure. I took dad’s advice and lay down and closed my eyes and thought about what dad and Brian might talk about while out. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew I was being woken up by someone tapping on my shoulder.
“Wake up Sandra, Brian and I have returned bearing a back of food.” Dad said holding a McDonald’s bag.
“Yummy and an ice cream cone too. I love you guys, thanks.” I said very appreciative of the food and ice cream. “What did you talk about while out.”
“Not much.” Brian said while fidgeting, I guess I’ll have to ask him later when we are alone, and I know just the trick to get him to talk.
“Here’s your food, enjoy.” Dad said as he handed me the bag, I opened it and found my favorite nuggets with sweet and sour sauce and fries. We all ate quietly until we were done eating. I gobbled down the last of the nine piece and last fry just as a very tall balding man knocked on the door to the room I was in. Dad got up and asked if he could help the man, he introduced himself as Mr. Chambers.
“Sandra this is Mr. Chambers, and he would like to talk to us about what happened today.” Dad said as he led the very muscular man into the room. I felt overwhelmed by his stature; he defiantly towers over the smaller Kevin.
“Good afternoon Sandra, my name is Brad Chambers, and I would like to first off apologize for my son’s actions against you today. He had no right or reason to do what he did. He will be held accountable for his actions which is why I am here today. I wanted to discuss with you, options other than having him arrested. He is a good boy; it’s just he has had problems relating to other kids his age. And if what I have in mind is ok with you, I think it might even help him become a better man.” Mr. Chambers said in a very soft spoken tone, he really seemed different sounding than he looked, very educated and caring.
“What do you have in mind Mr. Chambers?” I asked very curious.
“First of all Kevin will be required to apologize to you personally and in front of the whole tenth grade. I have also decided he needs to learn what it’s like to be perceived as he put it, ‘An outcast and a freak.’ His punishment will be to dress completely as a girl for fourteen days starting Monday. That way he will experience some of the things you might be going through. I can only imagine what it might be like but I have a great respect for you and Kevin needs to learn that and how to treat those around him.” Mr. Chambers was direct and to the point. “How do you feel about that Sandra?”
“I’m unsure of what to think, I do appreciate the respect you have shown me but I don’t know if this will work. What if he tries to injure me again?” I asked for assurance Kevin would not hurt me again.
“Don’t worry about that Sandy; I’ve got your back.” Brian said with a big smile and acting tough.
“I will guarantee that if you tell me that Kevin hurts you or anyone else he will be arrested for this action. In fact I’ll give you my cell number and you can get in touch with me at anytime you feel I need to be informed of any actions he takes.” Mr. Chambers said with conviction.
“I think I can live with that., I thank you for coming and apologizing to me personally Mr. Chambers.” I said honestly.
“You are very welcome Sandra, all my best to you and your father. Don’t forget to call.”
“I won’t Mr. Chambers.” With that Mr. Cambers handed me his business card and left. I then turned to Brian and dad. “What do you guys think about this?”
“I think it’s a hoot and great karma, I can’t wait to see Kevin at school trying to hide behind girls clothes.” Brian said with laughter.
“You two need to tread lightly on this subject. If Kevin gets picked on at school, who’s to tell anyone they can’t pick on you for the same reason Sandra, and even you Brian. You are dating and some might consider you gay for dating Sandra, even if she is a girl on the inside. Some might not see it that way, and if they see you two in on the fun of what will happen at school with Kevin. Then they will see you as a bully also and open for payback.” Dad said sternly.
When dad put it that way I had no choice but to agree. I would certainly not partake in any bullying or teasing when I saw Kevin next. I hope Brian feels the same way.
“Your right Mr. Davidson, Sandra we have to be careful and not in any way tease Kevin. I will still protect you if he becomes violent.”
“I was thinking the same thing Brian, it’s a good thing you and I think alike. If you didn’t then I would dump you.” I put that last part in just to put Brian in his place.
“Well you are my princess after all. I will only follow your lead my liege.” Brian said with a bow for emphasis.
“You’re such a kiss ass Brian.” I said then hit him on the shoulder.
“That’s quite enough you two, or I’ll have to ground you both. It’s getting late and visiting hours are almost over, so we will have to say our goodbyes and let Sandra get her rest.” Dad came over and gave me a hug and a kiss on the forehead. “I’ll see you in the morning sweetie, I’m stopping by on my way to work then I will pick you up on my way home.” He said smiling and patting me on the shoulder then looked at Brian. “Brian I will leave you and Sandy alone so you can say your goodbyes and then I’ll drive you home.”
“Thanks Mr. Davidson.” Brian said blushing.
“You’re welcome Brian, and please call me David.”
“Yes Mr. Da.… I mean David.” Brian corrected himself.
My dad then walked out and left us alone. I looked over at Brian and thought how much I love him. He saved me from being injured further, I had to thank him. “Brian I am truly thankful for helping me today. I didn’t mean to sound bossy earlier.” I said apologetically.
“Don’t worry about it. Your dad and I were only teasing you, besides I do think of you as my princess.”
“You’re a kiss ass Brian, come here.” I told him patting the spot on the bed next to me. Brian cautiously sat down, and I looked into his eyes, I realized right then I loved him more than anything. I then put my hand on his cheek and pulled him into a passionate kiss. I felt tingly all over, and was getting excited. He’s a good kisser, and I like what he’s doing with his tongue. I melted into him and let the kiss linger and for the first time in my life I let my hand fall to his lap and touched another penis. I could tell he was excited as I was even through the fabric. I had to cool down or I would make a mess, so I broke the kiss but still looked into his eyes and lost myself in them.
“I love you Brian.” I simply said.
“I love you too Sandra.” He said blushing but meant it. “That was fantastic; you think you might be ready for more?” He asked honestly and I could not blame him.
“Of that I am sure of Brian, I do want more, to be honest I’ve given it a lot of thought and I want to experience everything with you.” I told him sort of hesitant.
“You do? That’s great.” Brian said excitedly.
“Yes, I’ve soiled plenty of towels just fantasizing about it. If you know what I mean.” Shit, did I just tell him I was masturbating thinking about him, yep sure did, oops.
“I know exactly what you mean Sandra; I can’t wait to experience more with you. Maybe we can do more once the dance is over next Friday?” He said in a question. “Yes an after dance celebration dance just you and me alone.”
“That sounds great Brian, and I agree.” I was excited about it myself and wondered what it would be like. “It’s late and I wish you didn’t have to go, but the orderlies will kick you out promptly at 8 o’clock.”
“I know and I hate leaving you here alone.” Brian said with sadness. “I’ll see you tomorrow ok?”
“Of course silly, I can’t wait to see you again, good night Brian.” I told him then kissed him again, but not as long as before.
“Good night my love, see you soon.” Brian said as he walked out then he blew me a kiss at the door. God I love that man, I thought to myself, and fell fast asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.
I was woken up by a light tapping on my shoulder; I opened my eyes to see my dad standing over me with a smile.
“Good morning sweetie, have a nice sleep?” Dad asked pleasantly.
“Good morning dad, yes I slept well enough. My neck is kind of sore though but I feel better today.”
“Well that’s great honey, how would you like to get out of here?” Dad asked.
“Go home, absolutely. But I thought the doctor wanted me to stay the whole day?”
“I just finished talking to him, he said that you’re doing well enough to go home and back to school tomorrow.”
“That’s great dad, what about work?” I asked hopping he would not get in trouble on my account.
“Don’t you go worrying about it? My boss John is very understanding and told me not to worry about missing work.” Dad said easing my fears.
“I won’t dad, so the doctor says I’m ok then?” I asked just to be sure.
“Yes Sandra your fine, we just have to come back on Monday to get the stitches out.”
“Well I’m glad about that, let’s go home.”
Dad handed me a bag with some clothes in it. A simple yellow shirt and jeans and clean panties bra. I guess he’s a simple man. I dressed and soon dad and I were on our way home. It was a quite ride home. I just kind of zoned out and gazed at the passing buildings and passersby. I guess I wasn’t really in the talkative mood at the moment, which is almost a miracle for a teen aged girl. I then remembered about the dance and what Brian had said. I began to wonder what dad would think if I asked him about it.
“Dad, Brian asked me to the spring dance and I said yes, is that ok.” I asked a little red faced.
“Yes of course its ok, I expected that he would.” He said with a smile.
“Thanks, there is another thing I wanted to talk to you about, and it’s a hard subject for me to talk to you about.” I said a little slowly trying to get it all out.
“You can tell me anything Sandra, no matter what it’s about. I am here for you.” Dad said patting my knee and then turned into our driveway. “How about we get something to drink and sit and talk?”
“Ok.” I had not realized we were that close to home, I followed dad into the house. “I’ll have some iced tea please.” I asked as he opened the refrigerator.
“That sounds good, I’ll have one too.” Dad said and grabbed the container and two glasses from the cupboard and handed me a glass then poured it for me then poured himself one. We then took our drinks into the living room and sat down.
“So what would you like to talk about Sandy?” Dad asked with no concern as he looked to know what I would be asking.
“It’s about Brian and me. It…It’s.” I stumbled a bit. “I’ve been thinking a lot about being with Brian more intimately.” If my face was not red before, it sure was now.
“You mean sleeping together?” Dad said without a change of expression, little or no surprise. I was stunned to say the least.
“Yes.” I squeaked out. “You don’t mind?”
“What you and Brian do in private is your business. I just want you to be sure that this is what you want. I knew right away that your mother was the one for me. And I’m sure you feel the same way about Brian, am I right?” Dad asked with a smile.
“Yes, I love him more than anyone. I just now realized my feelings for him were deeper than I thought. I always thought I wasn’t gay. Now all I can think about is being with Brian.” I said not sure if what I said made any sense.
“Labeling yourself as anything is to early Sandra, whether you’re straight, gay, transgendered or somewhere in-between does not matter to me. I will still love you unconditionally.”
“Thanks dad, I love you.”
“I love you too sweetheart.” He then gave me a big hug then released me a few minutes later. “Let’s sit back down and finish our chat shall we.”
“Ok.” Dad and I talked for hours, mostly about school, Brian, the Spring Dance and of course he asked me again about Kevin and his punishment. I won’t bore you with all the details. It was a wonderful afternoon that I got and bonded closer to my dad. I have to say I felt much better after I talked to him about my feelings about my identity and not knowing which road I would ultimately take. He just sat and listened to me go on and on. He knew exactly when to interject with an idea or suggestion. He also told me not to stop questioning the world and my decisions. It’s the adult thing to do to look at the issues we are face with from multiple angles. For that I love and cherish my dad.
After our long talk dad asked if I would like to go out and get something to eat later. I said yes, and at that very moment there was a knock at the door. I went and opened it and standing there was Brian.
“Hi Sandra, I’ve missed you.” Brian said then gave me a hug. I’m beginning to love hugging him. He felt so warm and I could not help but melt into him. I looked into his deep brown eyes and kissed him.
“Hi yourself.” I said after breaking the kiss.
It took Brian a second to get his composure back. “I’m glad you’re out of the hospital.”
“Me too. Brian, would you like to come in?”
“Yes Please?” Brian said politely.
Brian and I sat and began talking. Dad excused himself and let us be. It was nice of him to give us space, even after I told him I had these feelings about Brian. The more we talked the more I felt at ease with him, Brian is such a good friend and I must be truthful, he’s very attractive too. We must have talked for hours about school. The biggest thing Brian had said had happened that the other students were all coming together in support for me. I could not believe that was happening, Brian explained that Kevin had spread rumors about me around school before he had hit me. No one believed him, and if they did no one seemed to care. I guess I will find out tomorrow when I get back to school.
It must have gotten late because dad came out and asked if Brian and I would like something to eat. We both said yes, and the three of us went out to dinner at Outback. It was a very nice and quiet dinner. I knew Brian and I both enjoyed the time with dad. I asked him if it would be ok if we go to dinner with his mother some time. He agreed and said Saturday would be perfect.
We soon found ourselves once again staring at each other on my porch waiting for the other to say good night. I took the lead and kissed him good night. It was another great kiss that once again led me to think about spending time ‘Alone’ with him. I don’t think I will be able to wait any longer, if I do I might explode in anticipation. I asked god for patience and went into the house and went to bed as I was tired.
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Sandra returns to school and finds she has a few new friends. How long will Sandra and Brian wait until there affections override their common sense? Chapter Eight By Sara D. |
“Brian, were you able to get your driving test done last night?” I asked Brian while waiting for the signal to change for us to cross the street to get to school.
“No, I was too worried about you and hurried home to see if you were ok, so I rescheduled it for this evening at six.” Brian answered.
“I’m sorry you missed the test Brian, but I am glad you were able to get the appointment changed.”
“I’d change the rotation of the Earth for you Sandy, I love you.” Brian said smiling at me. “So what are your plans for tonight?” Brian asked as my face became flush in embarrassment.
“I have an appointment with Dr. Louis tonight at 6:30, but I should be home by eight at the latest.”
“Is it ok if I come and see you when you get home?” He asked and looked so cute while saying it, almost like a puppy.
“Of course baby, you can come over anytime you want.” I then leaned over and gave him a peck on the cheek.
“You sure know how to please a guy Sandy.” Brian said while blushing.
“I know, I learned a lot from watching the other girls for years. I’ve practiced in the mirror a million times being a true girl.”
“I see, that’s how all you girls do it, you all get together and manipulate us guys into doing what you want.” Brian said chuckling.
“You know it buster.” I replied as the light changed to green. Brian and I crossed the road and went toward the front of our school. We were greeted by our friends Amy, Matt, Gina, Paul and Kim who were all standing in a group by the front doors. They were milling about just chatting and looking to be waiting around for something to happen.
“Hey welcome back Sandy!” Amy yelled to us as I approached the group. “How are you doing?” Amy asked as she gave me a friendly hug.
“I’m doing ok, just a little discomfort from the stitches.” I turned my head and lifted my hair to show them the bandage.
“How many stitches did you have to get Sandy?” Matt asked with concern in his voice.
“Just two stitches, the doctors and nurses at the hospital were great and took good care of me.” I answered with a smile that Matt was concerned.
“It’s great to see you back Sandy, a lot has happened already since Tuesday. We have all heard what Kevin’s punishment is to be.” Gina said snickering.
“Well Brian and I will not be partaking in any bullying or tormenting of Kevin. We do not want this to come around and bite us in the ass.” I told Gina and the rest of the group.
“That’s probably a good idea. I think we all should just stand back and watch what happens for the next few weeks.” Amy told everyone; Paul, Matt and Gina all agreed.
“So is what I have been hearing about you true Sandra?” Kim asked but not in an unkind way. I had never really talked to her in the past so I was unsure how I should respond. Amy must have seen my concerned look on my face and came to my aid.
“Does it matter Kim, one way or the other?” Amy asked Kim and looked at her for an answer. Kim looked to be thinking for a few minutes.
“Well no, I guess it does not matter and I would not mind being her friend. What do you say Sandra? You’re pretty popular now that everyone knows who you are.” Kim said then offered me her hand in friend ship. I took the opportunity and welcomed her as a new friend.
“I am glad you can see beyond the past Kim, I don’t want secrets to come between any of my friends. So yes at one time I once was a boy, but now I am a girl; and please call me Sandy.” I told her, her expression did not change and she accepted me as I am.
“I’m glad to finally meet you Sandy and I will be your friend.” Kim said sweetly.
“Thank you Kim, I could always use another friend.” Our attention was now turned elsewhere when Paul noticed a blue sedan pulled up next to the school entrance.
“Hey check it out, I think that is Kevin’s dad’s car pulling up, and that does not look like Kevin getting out.” Paul said and we all looked in the direction of the car.
The girl that got out of the car surprised me; in the back of my mind I was sure to see a boy in a dress. What I did see is a very pretty red haired girl in a cute dress. Someone had gone all out to dress this girl properly. There was no evidence of a boy left in the girl who was walking up. I looked at her face to try and see if she was miserable, to my further surprise there was no mistaking that this was a girl and she was happy. It was all in the eyes and face, her demeanor and look was bright and cheerful, not that of a boy in a dress as I was expecting. I knew then that something other than being a bully was bothering Kevin. The new girl approached our group of stunned teenagers. All of my friends had the look that I had, she was beautiful, and she then walked up to me and stood right in front of me with a pretty smile then formed into a pout.
“Sandra, I am truly sorry for what I had no right to do to you. Will you accept my apology?” She said with compassion and caring and as if she had come upon an epiphany.
“I will consider it if you tell me why you did it in the first place Kevin?” I asked a little angry because I was reminded of what happened by the soreness in the back of my head.
“Please let me explain, and please call me Brenda that’s my true name?” Brenda said with humility and continued. “I was hiding my true feelings from myself and the world and I became insanely jealous of you and your courage to become who you were meant to be. I could not see past my own fears of becoming what I was meant to be, a real girl.” Brenda finished with tears in her eyes and I began to feel the pain she had been fighting as much as I was just one week ago.
“I forgive you Brenda, I understand how you feel. Most of the people around you now are my friends, and if you are telling the truth, I am sure all of us can be friends together.” I said with a smile and looked at my friends for assurance, everyone except Brian nodded.
“Oh thank you Sandra, you are one of a kind. I am just so happy to have found myself and I would like to be your friend as well, all of you. I’m going to need it.” Brenda said looking at all of us and smiling.
“Welcome to our group Brenda.” Amy said being the first to accept Brenda as a friend. “I am sure all of us can put what has happened in the past and keep it in the past.” Gina, Paul, Kim, and Matt all shook her hand in forgiveness and welcome. Brian gave Brenda a hard look then his expression softened.
“What the hell, no hard feelings?” Brian finally asked and offered Brenda his hand in friendship.
“No, no hard feelings Brian. I am so sorry for hurting Sandra.” Brenda said then smiled at us all. “You are all good friends to each other; I just hope you can accept me as you have accepted Sandra.”
Everyone in the group nodded their okay, and then we all walked together into the school auditorium. We all took seats together in the bleachers except Brenda whose dad escorted her up to a podium that was set up in the center of the basketball court. Brenda looked very nervous as she walked up to the podium to address the tenth grade seated before her. Principal Mrs. Sherman then walked up with her and spoke first.
“Students, please settle down and give your attention to Brenda Chambers.” Mrs. Sherman said into the microphone loudly and everyone sat down and got quiet.
Brenda stepped up to the microphone and cleared her throat as she held index cards in front of her then began. “My fellow Yellow Jackets good morning. My name is Brenda Chambers. I am here to publicly apologize for my actions against Sandra Davidson on Tuesday. On Tuesday I lost my senses due to extreme jealously and my former self Kevin kicked Sandra in the back of the head. What I did to Sandra was uncalled for and a deplorable action of my former self. I realized I was jealous of her courage and willingness to live as she was meant to and I could not bring that courage to the surface until I was confronted by my father. For my actions I am truly sorry and have personally asked for forgiveness from Sandra. She has graciously accepted my apology and has even agreed to be my friend. Not a friend of Kevin’s, he is gone now but a friend to me, Brenda Chambers. Thank you.” Brenda began to cry softly as she finished her speech, and I could not help feel for her. So I stood up and started clapping and hoot and hollering in support for her. I think it was the right thing to do. Once I started the whole class followed my example and was soon told to quiet down by Principal Sherman.
“Can I have your attention please?” Mrs. Sherman said yelling into the microphone. “Settle down, settle down.” She said again and it became quiet. “Thank you Brenda that was a lovely speech. What all of you should take away from today is to accept other people no matter what. Each and every one of you is unique in your own way and must learn to be mindful of those around you and how your actions might affect them.” She paused for a second to catch her breath. “Thank you all for showing your support for Sandra and for Brenda, their challenge is not over yet. So I ask you all to be a friend to them, if you find you can’t I ask you to mind your own business. You are all dismissed.” Mrs. Sherman then gave Brenda a friendly hug and looked over at me and smiled and then dismissed us all.
The rest of the day went pretty mildly, . I ran into Brenda a few times between classes and she seemed to be in a very good mood and alive for the first time. I could not see the former bully when I looked at her.
We had a substitute in English today and I completed my research on the net for a book report quickly. I used my free time and searched for and download a name change form. I read the directions and then filled it out and printed it. I will have to have dad sign it before submitting it to the court.
After school let out, Brian walked me home and said.
“Sandra, will you come over to my house for a while before we have our appointments tonight?”
“Sure, I’d like that.”
“Great. Maybe we can invite my mom and your dad to dinner tomorrow night?” Brian asked.
“That’s a great idea. I bet your mom and my dad would have a lot of fun together.”
“I’m sure that they would, in fact your dad asked me a lot about my mom the other night. He seems to be quiet interested in her.”
“Oh really, that is interesting. I wonder if my dad is attracted to your mom. That would be so neat.” I told Brian thinking it would be nice for dad to have some companionship, even for only a night.
“I think he is, but what if they were to get married at some point, wouldn’t that make us brother and sister?” Brian asked with concern.
“Step siblings at the least, but who cares, I love you and you love me right?” I asked him just to confirm his feelings for me.
“Of course I love you Sandy.” Brian said with a smile. “Your right, let’s not worry about that.”
Brian and I then walked into his house and were greeted by his mom. She looked happy to see me and gave me a hug. “I am glad you are ok Sandra, how are you feeling?”
“I’m ok Mrs. Jones and I am feeling fine other than a small amount of discomfort where the stitches are.”
“How many times do I have to tell you to call me Janice?” She said laughing.
“Sorry Janice, I was just being polite.” I told her.
“Nonsense, you are Brian’s girlfriend and so close to us that you are considered family.”
“Thank you Janice, that makes me feel accepted.” I blushed and smile at her.
“You’re welcome. What are you two up to today?” She asked looking at Brian.
“Sandy agreed to help me study for my test tonight; she’s a very good driver.” Brian said meekly
“That’s nice; go ahead I’ll leave you two love birds alone, have fun.”
Brian and I went into his room and shrugged our shoulders about what she was talking about. I think I helped him study for about ten minutes before we were kissing. I could not help myself, he was just so cute sitting there taking in what I was saying. It was another magical kiss, and I again melted into him. He’s just so gentle and caring I knew I would not be able to wait much longer before we would take the next step. I had to stop myself and ask God for patience again. I knew it was too soon to take that step.
“That was wonderful Brian, but I stopped because I need to get a few things straight with Dr. Louis tonight before I allow us to get to the next step. I feel that I need to get an answer from her first.” I told him, and he looked to understand.
“Don’t worry about it Sandy, I can wait. I admit I want our relationship to go to the next step, but I will respect your decision not to go to the next level, if that is your choice.”
“Thank you Brian, your one in a million, you know that.” I told him. “And I do love you.”
“I love you to Sandra.” Brian reassured me. I just love how he called me Sandy when we were being casual and Sandra when serious.
I continued to grill Brian on his knowledge of the rules and laws for his driving test for the next hour. Once I felt he knew what he needed for the test I suggested his mom take him for a quick drive and then parted way’s as I had to get to my appointment as well.
“Good luck my love.” I told Brian and gave him a peck on the lips as he got into the driver’s seat of his mothers blue Ranchero.
“Thanks.” He said smiling and putting on his seat belt. He looked just adorable adjusting the mirrors and seat for comfort. Dad had always smiled at me each time I got behind the wheel and did the same. Brian then pulled out of his driveway and waved good bye to me. I walked home, got cleaned up and redid my makeup for my appointment with Thelma. Dad was already home.
“You ready to go Sandy?” Dad asked and handed me the keys to his F150 truck.
“Yah… Sure, thanks dad, I’m ready.” I loved driving his truck, and we were on our way.
About five minutes into the drive a heard the quick yelp of a police siren and saw a cop behind us. I knew I didn’t do anything wrong so I wondered why he was pulling us over. I looked over at dad with a shrug and a question on my mind.
“Dad, I did nothing wrong, why is he pulling us over?”
“I haven’t a clue sweetie, just ask when he gets here.”
“Ok, I’ll ask him.” I said a little worried as I pulled off the road and stopped in a safe area. The policeman walked up to my window as I rolled it down.
“Good afternoon Miss, I’m Officer Sinclair and the reason I pulled you over is your right side tail light is out.” The officer explained why he had pulled me over. “Can I please see your driver’s license, registration and proof of insurance please?” He watched me closely as I fumbled around in my purse for my license. Dad all the while was calm and quickly pulled the registration and insurance cards out of the glove box. Now I realized why having a purse is a nuisance at times, everything ends up on the bottom. Once I found my wallet I handed everything to the officer and he looked at them briefly.
“Thank you Miss, I’ll be back in a second, I just have to check your record.” He then went back to his patrol car and I looked over at dad.
“What kind of ticket am I going to get for this dad?” I asked worried as I had an impeccable driving record for the two months I had been driving.
“Probably just a fix-it ticket, as the registered owner I am ultimately responsible for the truck.” Dad told me easing my fear of getting my first ticket.
A few short minutes later the officer once again came up to the driver’s side window.
“Everything seems to be in order, I will just give you a warning this time Miss, please get the light fixed before you drive again.” The Officer said politely. “One more thing, there is a problem with your driver’s license it has you down as a male. I checked the records on the computer and they match the records of a Tim Davidson, would you mind explaining this?” The officer looked confused as he looked at me; I knew the picture on the license resembled me so he must have thought the DMV had made a mistake. I knew it was wrong to lie to the police so I had no choice but to tell him the truth.
Speaking slowly I told him the truth. “Sir, my driver’s license is correct at least for the gender for now. My name is legally being changed to Sandra Ellen Davison in a few weeks. I am a transsexual and I’m in RLT.” I told him hoping he would understand and be lenient.”
“I assume your this young ladies father and can vouch for her?” The officer asked dad.
“Of course sir this is my daughter and what she said is true. We are actually on our way to her psychiatrist for an appointment, and as the registered owner of the vehicle I will also take care of the burned out tail light as well.” Dad explained to the Officer.
“Ok then, you have nice day and drive safely.” He said without reaction to my situation then handed back my license and the truck paperwork. He then left us be and drove off in search of his next violator.
“You know it’s not right to fib to the police Sandra, but he did not check on the lie you told about you name change.” Dad looked at me with that look; I guess I should let the other cat out of the bag to him.
“I was actually truthful to a point dad.” I said looking at him for a reaction then dug out the name change application which was folded in my purse’s outer zipper. He looked at the form for a few minutes then looked at my face.
“Are you sure about this?”
“Absolutely sure dad, I know who I am, and I think at some point I want to marry and this is one step in the right direction to obtain it. Just having my license have my true name and updated picture on it will help when asked about who I am when situations like this one happen again.”
“Your right of course sweetie, I just wanted to be sure you had thought it through, and you obviously have, we are running late so let’s get to your appointment.”
“Yes sir.” I said and drove us the rest of the way to Dr. Louis’ office.
Soon I was waiting in the reception area of Thelma’s office, and was ushered in by her clerk. I sat down on the couch in her office and was greeted by Dr. Louis who followed me in.
“Good evening Sandra, I hear you had an eventful week so far.” Dr. Louis asked and continued. “Care to tell me about it?”
“That’s the understatement of the year, . I had a good day at school Monday, Got kicked in the head on Tuesday, missed school yesterday and today I made friends with the person who kicked me in the head who is now a girl like me.” I said quickly and out of breath.
“Anything else happen?” She asked for more.
“Yes there is more.” I paused for a second to catch my breath. “It’s only been eight days and my emotions feel like a roller coaster ride. I know I am a girl on the inside and want to be one completely. It’s just that when I’m with Brian my male parts get excited and when I am alone I use them for pleasure. I’ve kissed him almost every day so far and I simply melt into him. He is just so cute, and I want to experience more with him as I am. These feelings are confusing the hell out of me.” I told Thelma.
“All these feelings are natural, you are still physically male and the female hormones and testosterone blockers won’t take effect for several weeks. You are still taking your pills daily aren’t you?
“Yes I am and I haven’t missed a dose yet.” I answered truthfully.
“Well that is good, I am sure that with time you will figure out what is right for you. You can still be a girl and keep you male parts if that is what you decide. Just keep in mind that your testicles and penis will become smaller as time passes. We can’t tell for sure what size you will ultimately be, but if you want to experience sex with your male parts it is something you must consider.”
“I am aware of the side effects and I am sure what I am doing is right. I haven’t felt so good since the last time mom and I had a day out together. I just wanted to voice my concerns to you and I think I have come to a conclusion, at least for now. I know for at least the mean time, until I turn 18 I will enjoy what I have and then make the ultimate leap and become a full woman at that time.”
“That very well may be the choice you make. That is why these counseling sessions are so important and why we don’t make rash and unalterable decisions in these cases. It gives you time to live as you think you should and find out if this is right for you. I know from your past sessions that it is right for you. You are more mature, well rounded and seem more an alive.”
“Thank you Thelma.”
I then related what had transpired at school with Brenda and how I accepted her apology and even consider her a friend. I knew that forgiveness was what God taught and I felt that I needed to know what Thelma thought about it.
“You know Sandra; there are many adults who would not have forgiven the way you did. I am proud of you, and your beliefs in God and his teachings will only enhance and enlighten you in life.” Thelma said and drove home my own beliefs and made me feel better. “You may find Brenda to be a better friend than an enemy in time, even lifelong friends.”
“I think I’d like that.” I paused then thought for a second. “Thelma, thank you for your advice and counsel, I feel much better about myself and who I am. May I give Brenda your card; she may need someone to talk to?” I asked.
“Of course, and I would be glad to talk to her. Well that wraps up our session for today, see you next Thursday.” Thelma smiled and led me to the reception area.
“Thanks Thelma, see you Thursday.” I then approached dad and told him I was ready to go.
“How was your session?” Dad asked as we walked out to the car.
“It was great, very enlightening. I understand why I feel the way I do and I know which direction I want to go.” I told dad and looked for a reaction and he smiled.
“What direction is that sweetie?” He asked concerned with my decision.
“For now I am going to continue my hormone treatments to become as female as possible then make a decision as to surgery when I am 18. I know Brian will be ok with my decision as he has made it clear he is in love with me no matter what.”
Dad just looked like he normally did then he got a sad look on his face. “Sorry Sandra, you good old dad just got a little sad remembering the good times I had with your previous self. You must know I support you in what you are doing and I love you very much.” Dad then gave me a hug and I hugged him back tightly. We then got into the car and began to drive home.
I broke the silence a few blocks down the road. “Dad, when can we drop of the name change paperwork?”
“I signed it already while you were in with Thelma. If you would like the courthouse is on the way home.”
“Ok, thanks dad.” I said and turned on the next corner into the courthouse. Dad and I walked up to the night clerk’s window and waited our turn. The lady at the window smiled at us as the man who was in front of us left.
“Next” She said as I stepped to the window and handed her my name change paperwork. She looked it over and then stamped and dated the forms. “Everything seems to be filled out correctly and in order. May I please have a copy of your doctors RLT letter for the file please?” She asked in a professional manner. I pulled the letter from my purse, unfolded it and handed it to the clerk.
“Here you go.” I said quietly.
“I’ll be back in a jiffy” She said then walked over to a copier to make a copy then handed back my original. “Your hearing is set for 3pm Tuesday in courtroom number four.” She handed me a copy of the schedule. “Good luck and have a nice evening miss.”
“Thank you.” I said then walked back out.
“That was easy.” Dad said as we walked out.
“Yah it sure was.”
“I’ll pick you up at school at 2:30. I’ll call and make sure they let you out early so we won’t be late.”
“Ok, thanks dad.”
We were soon home and we were greeted by Janice and Brian. Brian had a huge grin and a piece of paper in his hand. I could not contain my excitement and ran up to him and gave him a hug because I knew he had passed his driver’s test. “You passed!” I said excitedly and then kissed him.
“Yes, thanks to your tutoring.” Brian said with a smile and hugged me tighter. “Mom, Sandra and I would like to know if you would like to join us and David to dinner tomorrow night.”
“Yes I would like that.” Janice said and smiled at my dad.
“I would like that too.” Dad responded and gave us a knowing smile.
Brian and I then went over and sat on his back porch while dad and Janice kept talking on the front porch. I was looking at the stars as it began to get dark and felt good about myself. Brian was doing the same and I looked over into his beautiful eyes and lost myself in them. I leaned over and kissed him on the lips and melted into him. Both of our emotions took over and I let it happen again. I felt his hand slide up my thigh and he began to rub me through the jean’s I was wearing. It felt wonderful, and I did the same. He was certainly hard when I felt him and once I rubbed him he broke our wonderful kiss.
“Sandra, I want you so bad. I don’t know if I can wait any longer. Please will you sleep with me?” Brian said almost begging.
“I do want to Brian but I want to wait until the time is right.” I told him.
“I can wait.” Brian said sort of pouting.
Brian and I sat quietly snuggling for about an hour when he broke the silence.
“Sandra, I love you no matter what. And now that I’ve finally had you, please will you think about not having surgery right away when you’re eighteen. I am kind of hoping you will keep yourself just as you are, I know I’m being selfish, but I just wanted to be truthful with you.”
“I will have to think about it before I give you an answer Brian. I do love you and I did enjoy what just happened and I want to do it again. But in my heart I am a girl and I think I need time to see if that is what is right for me.”
“I can respect that Sandy, however you are a girl. In your heart, mind and how you present yourself is all woman to me. I love you just the way you are.” Brian told me and I agree with him. I just needed time to think.
“I will let you know soon Brian just be patient.”
“No problem, I will wait for you forever.”
I then kissed him and cuddled with him for a while. His mom and my dad came out to find us about a half hour latter.
“How are things with the two love birds?” Janice said noticing our disheveled looks.
I kind of jumped when I heard her say that. Janice seemed to understand the look on our embarrassed faces.
“It’s ok for you two to kiss. The two of us don’t mind.” Janice said and nudged my dad for an agreement.
I gave Brian a peck on the lips as dad and I walked out. I was obviously tired after our encounter.
I grabbed my purse as I walked to my room. I pulled the court paperwork out to look at it again when I did the card the nurse from the hospital gave me fell out. What was her name, oh yah Betty. I looked at the card and contemplated emailing her then made the decision to do it. I turned on my computer and began writing.
‘Dear Kelly,
My name is Sandra and your sister Betty was kind enough to give me your email address. I hope you don’t mind that I am writing you but I am a girl in a similar situation to yours and I need advice. I don’t want you to think that I am some sort pervert or something but I have a few questions about the feelings I am having. I am in love with a very passionate and caring guy. I know he loves me very much, and the feelings I get are more than I can ever explain. I know in my heart I am a girl. But after my experience tonight I am thinking about not changing my male parts. I have always believed that surgery was the only option for me. But now I am not sure that is right for me. I love Brian and He loves me, and he told me he loved me the way I am. If you have any advice for a confused teenager, please respond and email me at '[email protected]'.
Thank You
Sandra Davidson.
I sent the email and then went to sleep as is was now past eleven.
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It's Friday and the dinner date for all four is tonight. Do David and Janice have fun and spend more time together? How does Sandra and Brian's relationship grow? Chapter Nine By Sara D. Edited by "STANMAN" Thank You!!! |
Today started out as another good day. I felt especially feminine and I wore my pink skirt and white top. Brian complimented me on my appearance and I blushed in appreciation.
School was it usual place, and everyone milled about talking in groups, as usual. Amy, Mat, Gina, Paul, Kim, Brian and I had just sat down for lunch when Brenda asked if she could sit with us during lunch. None of us objected as she sat next to Kim. Kim even smiled at Brenda and I began to wonder if Kim was now interested in her. I then asked Brenda if I could see her alone for a second after we ate.
"Brenda, I would like to talk to you privately after lunch. I have a person you might like to talk too. She has helped me a lot."
Brenda smiled, "OK."
Brian leaned over and whispered, “What's that about?"
I whispered back, "I'm just going to give her my psychiatrist's card."
"Oh,” He simply said.
Amy then spoke up and reminded everyone of next Friday's spring dance and that we were all going to dress up nice and the guys would wear tuxedo's and us girls would wear our prettiest gowns. The spring dance is always at the end of the first term and I then remembered that meant report cards were coming out and I was struggling in science class for an A. I was having a hard time remembering the periodic table and got a C minus on our last test. I shook that thought and focused on the dress for the dance next Friday.
"I wish I had someone to take me to the dance," Kim said over the rest of us speaking all at once. And without missing a beat Brenda spoke up.
"I'll take you to the Dance Kim," Brenda said smiling that quickly turned into an expression of embarrassment when we all looked at her with confusion. "What, so I like girls,” Brenda quickly said unfazed.
"I accept you invitation," Kim replied before any of us could say or do anything, and then gave us a look that said 'what'.
We all looked at each other and shrugged. I felt the need for some comic relief.
"So, who is going to be wearing the tuxedo then?" I snickered.
"Not me," Kim answered.
"Not me either," Brenda also said.
"This should be a very interesting dance, two boys going together one of which is living as a girl, and two girls, one of which is also a boy living as a girl," I said to lighten the mood and question that might be in the minds of my friends.
"It will not bother me, not as long as I have Amy," Matt told us.
"Same with me," Paul piped in and gave Gina small hug.
Lunch continued on and us girls talked about are dresses and what might happen after the dance. It was nice to have all these good friends and I was glad to have them all. The bell quickly rang for fifth period and we were all of on our separate ways. Brenda found me at the door to the lunch room.
"What did you want to talk to me about?"
"I have a card from my psychiatrist; she's great and is willing to see you, if you are interested,” I said then handed her Thelma's card.
"Thelma Louis, Like in the movie?" She asked, laughing.
"No silly, her last name is pronounced LEWIS. I thought the same thing when I first met Thelma, but she quickly corrected me during my first session. Just call her Thelma, she'll tell you that first thing for sure."
"Ok thanks Sandra, you're becoming a true friend."
"You're welcome Brenda, and please call me Sandy."
I also wanted to ask her about Kim, but thought it better not to bring it up just yet.
"Thanks again Sandy, see you later."
"See yah,” I said and headed for Science.
Brian once again was a gentleman and walked me home, walking hand in hand all the way to my front porch. I knew that tonight was going to be a special night, not only for us but for my dad and Brian's mom Janice.
We were all going out to dinner, which would give me and Brian a chance to hook up our parents.
Brian turned to me as I unlocked the front door to my house, "So, do you think it still OK that your dad and my mom might see more of each other after tonight?"
"Of course not, I think it's cool that they seem to like each other," I responded and led the way into the house and to our surprise, dad and Brian's mom were sitting and chatting on the couch, very close together I might add.
"Hi kids," said Dad.
"Hi Dad, hi Janice,” I greeted them.
"Hi Mom, hi David," said Brian.
"How was school?" Dad asked as I took a seat on one of the chairs across from the couch and Brian did the same, he looked like he was wondering what was going on.
"It was good, you two seem to be having fun talking," Brian answered with a smile.
"Listen kids, we have something important to tell you," Janice stated then paused. "David and I have decided to get married, I know it will come as a surprise to the both of you; we were just talking about how to tell you guys." Janice explained to them.
I was astonished, and I could tell that Brian was, as well.
"We talked a lot last night, and in the past and have been seeing each other for a while. We both have a lot in common, and I like that he has a feminine side as well," Janice finished.
Brian looked as if he just swallowed a bird and began to cough, "...Fem... Feminine Side," He then looked at me for an answer I think Brian was just a little shocked.
I wasn't sure if I should be the one to explain; I knew of my dad's past but did not know all the details as we have yet to talk about it. Dad was the first to speak up.
"When we moved into this house 17 years ago, Claudia and I were greeted by a lovely woman and her husband, we became fast friends. Jake and I would watch the game together and Janice and Claudia would shop together. One day, Jake ran into Sara, she was dressed very nicely in a sheath dress, makeup and hair done really nice. It only took Jake about ten seconds to figure out it was me. I was worried but Jake took it in stride, asked if I were gay. I answered no of course reminding him I was married. We had a laugh at my expense but he accepted me because he and I liked the same foot ball teams and watched them on weekends. Soon after he must have told your mother Brian, and we girls were soon shopping together." Dad paused for a second to look for reactions from us. I did have one, this I had to hear more about.
"Please Dad; tell us more,” I told him with a knowing smile.
"Of course sweetie, as I was saying we had a great time together. Soon your mother and Janice became pregnant and I made up my mind to not dress while you were a young child. Sadly Jake was shot and killed while trying to save the life of a police officer, he was a great man Brian." Dad paused and had a sad face as if remembering something.
"Your dad was much quicker at getting out of the car than I; he and I were driving home from a foot ball game when we came upon a lone cop struggling with an armed man. Brian your dad saved that cops life that night, but was shot and later died at the hospital. Sandra's mom and I agreed I would be a surrogate father for you. That is why we always included you when going on trips and outings together with us. I must say you have turned out to be a very compassionate and caring young man. And I am proud to have you as my daughter's boyfriend." Dad finished and let what he said sink in.
Brian looked at my dad for a moment and smiled then gave my dad a great big bear hug, "I would be very happy to call you dad. I love you and Sandra very much,"
Janice and I then both joined in the hug. I could not believe this was happening so fast. Brian is my boyfriend and now my brother as well. I thought about how I might feel if this were to happen. But having my dad and Janice getting married shocked me and I did not know what to think.
"I am proud of you too Sandra, you are a lovely girl and I always wanted a daughter to spoil. I know I can't take your mothers place but I will try to embrace her memory and treat you like you are my daughter."
Janice said squeezing us tighter in the hug.
I now had tears of happiness in my eyes, as did the rest of my family, "Janice, I would be grateful to have you as my mother. I know my mom is smiling in heaven now, that you and dad have made this important decision."
I told her really happy. No kidding, it hit me like a bolt of lightning; I felt a tingling sensation throughout my body and accepted it.
We all then sat down and talked for a while. It has been one hell of a roller coaster ride these last eight days. Wow what a week, and many more to go. I think we are going to be ok. Brian and Janice went to their house to freshen up, and dad and I decided to do the same.
I went up to my bedroom and took off my school clothes and jumped into the shower. I used my good lavender body wash and shampoo. I remembered to run the razor on my legs, pits and private parts to make myself hairless.
I did not have to worry about chest hair, I did not have any. I dried off and went back to my room and dress for our night out. I wanted to look fantastic so I decided my LBD. It has a nice v neck with spaghetti straps and falls to an inch above the knee, I also wanted special panties and bra, and I chose the red satin set and quickly had the panties up my legs.
I once again got excited and had to push myself between my legs to give me a flat front. I then put on the bra and inserted my homemade bra inserts. I then sat and did my makeup and hair. Once I was dressed and ready I joined dad who was looking pretty strapping himself in a pair of grey slacks and a red button shirt.
"My, don't you look beautiful tonight," Dad said looking me up and down.
"Not bad yourself," I said giving him a peck on the cheek for just being him. The door bell rang and I opened the door.
"You look gorgeous Sandy." Brian said returning the compliment.
Brian sure cleaned up nice; no he was very attractive in his black slacks and black button shirt. He looked hot, if I say so myself, "Brian you look wonderful." I told him as I ushered him into the room.
"Janice you look absolutely stunning!" Dad exclaimed as he got a good look at Brian's mom.
"You look very handsome David,” Janice responded.
"Shall we go?" Dad asked us all.
We all grabbed our coats as it was chilly and headed out for dinner. This time dad took us all to Cattleman's. Dad must have called ahead and made reservations because the place was full. We were quickly seated and asked what we would like to drink by our hostess. Dina our hostess came back shortly and gave us our drinks, I had an iced tea and so did Brian. Dad and Janice both had wine; I guess Brian and I will be driving home tonight.
"Brian, will you be a dear and drive us home tonight?" Dad asked as he handed Brian his truck keys, and if I did not know better you would have thought dad handed Brian a brick of gold as he clutched those keys.
"Of course, it would be my pleasure,” Brian said with a huge grin.
Our waitress soon came by and asked what we would like to order. We all ordered and chatted while waiting for our dinners. The night was starting off very nicely. I began to talk about the spring dance and what our friends had decided to wear.
"It sounds like a lovely evening you have planned. Do you have a dress?" Janice asked.
"Yes, I was thinking of the white dress I wore to church on Sunday,” I told her.
"Heavens no, while that dress is quite beautiful, you need a proper and lovelier dress to match the tuxedo that David will be getting Brian. We will go shopping tomorrow, and I have always wanted a daughter to do that with and it will be fun."
I had little choice; an outing with Janice to by a dress would be enjoyable. And who was I to argue, heck I've only been dressing full time for a week.
We spent the rest of the evening talking about the dance and the fancy dresses and tuxedos we were all going to wear. Janice perked up at that.
Dad just smiled and nodded in agreement, "Brian, I'll take you and we will get you all sorted out with a great tuxedo."
I was looking at Dad, waiting for him in expectation. I knew he was up to something from the smirk he had on his face.
Dad then looked at me. "What color dress are you thinking about Janice, so we can get Brian the right color cummerbund?"
"I was thinking a light peach would suit Sandra's complexion quite well.
Why don't we all go together then meet up later and then compare."
"That's a great Idea Janice."
We finished our great meal and headed home. My head was filled with two great things. Dad and Janice were getting married and Janice was going to take me shopping for a formal dress tomorrow. What a great life. As Brian pulled dad truck into our driveway. We all got out of the car and Brian and I headed for the back porch to be alone.
"Brian, how do you feel about what your mom and my dad said?" I asked as we were looking at the beautiful sky again. The night felt magical again.
"I feel good to tell you the truth, your dad has been like a father to me for a long time. And besides what they have done for us with the hotel makes me tingle." Brian said with a smile
"Me too, I can hardly wait. I am nervous though, I think about us being Step brother and sister and how that might change things,” I told him.
"Don't worry; nothing will ever change how I feel about you Sandra."
I could not help myself; I kissed Brian deeply and let his tongue explore my mouth. I quickly melted into him and could feel him get excited. I could tell he knew I was excited as well. We parted after several minutes.
"It is truly a beautiful night; the sky is so full of stars," I said.
"But not as beautiful as you Sandra, I love you.' Brian interjected, He looked at me deeply and I lost myself in his eyes. This just reaffirmed my love for him.
I then heard a loud bang and then glass breaking from inside the house.
Brian and I both looked at each other and ran into the house to see what was happening.
As we entered the living room my dad and Janice were getting up from the floor and a lamp had broken from failing from the table next to the couch. Janice's blouse was open exposing her bra and dad's pants were around the ankles. Janice and dad's faces were a mess of smeared lipstick. I could not help but laugh at catching them in such a compromising position.
"Um... Sorry kids, we kind of got carried away,” Dad said pulling up his pants and Janice finished closing her blouse both trying to not be embarrassed.
"We should have been more careful, we will be in the future,” Janice said with a very red face, and then began to join me in laughing. "It looks as if you two have also been a little careless."
I began to blush now and I could see a worried look on Brian's Face.
"Listen kids, it’s OK with us if you explore your feelings for each other, Janice and I sure have." Dad said and continued. "In fact, I will go ahead and spring our surprise on you now."
"What surprise is that dad?" I asked wondering.
"Janice and I have agreed to get you a Limousine for you and your friends to make your night more magical and fun."
"Really, your not are kidding us?" I said all giddy.
"No I'm not kidding; we have also gotten you a reservation at the Luxor Hotel for the night. We agree that you two need the time to be alone together and experience what both of us had at your age." Dad explained more.
I was completely stunned by what dad was implying and had to ask the obvious question. "Are you sure it's OK that we do that Dad?"
"We both know just by watching you two how much each of you loves one another. We feel that it's only right, at this early stage in your transition you are able to have this experience and ultimately it might help you decide your future."
I could not help myself and had to give my dad a hug for such an opened minded decision for Brian and me.
"Don't worry Dad, we will do the right thing and I will treat Sandy like a princess." Brian said joining the hug.
I knew that our lives from here would be interesting and that Brian would soon be mine. I was certainly excited about the prospect of spending the night at a hotel with Brian.
We continued to talk for another hour about our future, mostly about dad and now my new mom's wedding. It was getting late so I said good night to Brian and Janice.
"I'm getting tired, good night Brian, and I hope you don't mind, good night Mom," I said with a smile at Janice.
"Not at all Sandra, good night, I will see you all tomorrow."
"Good night, my princess," Brian stated. "I love you."
"I love you too, Brian."
I walked up to my room in a daze, and wondered what I might discover tomorrow as I cleaned up and went to bed. I heard dad come in and close up the house about an hour later and I quickly fell asleep thinking about tomorrow.
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A day at the mall with my soon to be new mom was great, that is until my maternal grandparents showed up at the house. Chapter Ten By Sara D. Edited by "Michelle B." Thank You!!! |
I woke up early to get ready for my shopping trip with my newly announced mom to be. I knew in my heart that she and I would get along very well. I mean Brian and I have been friends forever and she had been dating my dad for months in secret. She won’t take the place of my real mother, but it I know it will be nice to have a mother figure to help through the rough areas in life.
After a quick shower I slipped on my panties and bra. I glanced at my computer and remembered the email I had sent to Kelly Smith and I that had totally forgotten to check for a response. I logged in and check my mail and sure enough she had written me back.
’Dear Sandra,
Do not think for one minute you are a pervert. Your feelings for your boyfriend and how you perceive your female self are in conflict. Your final decision as to which direction you ultimately go is for you and your psychiatrist to determine. If you decide to stay physically male be aware that with long term female hormones your male parts will function rarely or not at all. My advice to you as a woman who has gone through the exact feelings you are going through is to enjoy life and to take all decisions in life, one day at a time. If it is your decision to remain physically male, I encourage you to seek the help of Dr. Johansson, an Endocrinologist, who is well known for developing a special hormone cocktail for people that are like you. His contact info is below. Please don’t hesitate to write again. Good luck Sandra, you may email me anytime you have more questions.
Your new friend
Kelly.’
(Dr. Tim Johansson, 415 S. 1Oth Street. 1-800-555-1212.)
Wow, I thought ‘a Doctor that specializes in girls like me’. I will definitely have to ask Thelma about him at our next session. I then sent a quick thank you to Kelly and signed off the computer.
“Honey its Janice, can I come in?” I was in the middle of sliding my skirt on when she knocked at my door.
“Sure, come right in.” She opened the door and saw my half dressed state of a skirt and bra. I had been stuffing my bra with makeshift forms since day one. I was still waiting for the boob fairy to show herself. I know it’s only been a week and a half since my shot and daily doses of female hormones, but a girl can dream can’t she. Janice came over to me and looked at my chest.
“My my, we are definitely going to have to get you a more realistic pair before the dance.” She said indicating my breasts. “Would you like to get a pair of real breast forms Sandy?” Janice asked while smiling.
“Of course I would, that would be great. I know they are expensive but I’ll help pay.” I told Janice.
“That’s not necessary I will take care of them for you and it would be my pleasure to purchase them for you.”
“That would be outstanding. Thank you very much I can’t tell you how much that would mean to me.” I cannot believe Janice would buy breast forms for me. I know today will be special for me and I will listen to whatever she has to teach me. I know that she will be a great mom once she and dad are married.
“I’ve always wanted a daughter and today will be a very special day for us. I’ve never had the chance to do this before and I cannot get over how much like your mother you are.” Janice said putting a hand in my hair and straightening it out while I was doing my makeup.
“Thank you for saying that. It means a lot to me, and I know today will be a special day for me as well. I just hope dad and Brian have a good time as well.
I’m sure they will have a good time. You know your father and shopping, always hopeless and in need of help from us women. But I think in this case your father’s keen knowledge of fashion will help.” Janice said snickering.
I could not help but laugh myself. “You knew my parents before I was born, and you were able to see my dad dressed up, how did he look?”
“He actually looked good, and along with your mom we looked like a bunch of sisters out for a day of fun.” She told me as she helped me finish getting dressed.
Soon Brian, Dad, Janice and I were on our way to the mall, once dad parked his truck Janice and I went to David’s Bridal and Dad and Brian were walking to the Men’s Warehouse. Dad told us he would meet us at the food court in a few hours.
Janice led the way then stopped turned and said. “You know it might be a good idea to get the breast forms first Sandra. It will make trying on dresses easier.” She grabbed her phone and called dad. “Dave, I’m taking Sandra outside the mall for a quick drive, I have the spare key to the truck.” She paused to listen. “I’m going to take her to Sally’s, sorry I forgot I wanted to take her there in all the excitement this morning. She already knows. Ok I’ll tell her, love you to, bye.” She hung up and put the phone back in her purse. “Your dad said to have fun picking out your new chest.” She said laughing.
We arrived at Sally’s and Janice lead the way in and we were greeted by an older woman. “Good morning, Welcome to Sally’s,” She said offering her handshake to us. “I’m Sally what can I do for you ladies today?”
“Hi, I’m Janice and this is my soon to be step daughter Sandra, and we are here to get her natural breast forms, she needs a pair that we can glue on for a formal dress.”
“Ok not a problem, um is Sandra on hormones? I only ask because it helps in the fitting and future natural growth.”
Janice looked at me and I knew she wanted me to answer. “Yes, I’ve been taking them for a week now.”
“A week, ok so it will be months before you start showing growth, how old are you dear?” Sally asked unfazed.
“Sixteen,” I said blushing.
“Perfect, just come back to the dressing room and I will measure you and get you fitted.”
I followed her back into the changing room where she asked me to take my top and bra off. She looked at my makeshift breasts.
“Tsk, Tsk, a girl your age deserves something much more real looking.” Sally said laughing. She then pulled out a measuring tape and pulled it across my flat chest and then pulled out a chart. “Just give me a second and I’ll go get a pair for you to try.”
I looked around aimlessly at the changing room floor while I waited for Sally to return. She returned shortly with a box that she opened as she sat.
“I picked a B cup for you, it will match your size perfectly and is practically the same as the make shift ones you were using.” Sally then placed the first one up to my left breast and held it there.
“Oh, that’s cold.” I said startled.
“Sorry dear, now these forms will transfer you body heat and you will be able to feel slightly when someone special touches them. Do you have someone special?” She asked smiling.
I couldn’t help but blush. “His name is Brian; he’s taking me to the Spring Dance.”
“Oh, isn’t that nice. You’re such a pretty girl; I must say you have made the right choice. I know I did.” Sally confessed.
“You’re a… I mean you used to be…” My voice trailed off.
“Born a man yes, but I am all woman now. That’s why I opened this place; it’s for girls just like us.”
“Wow, cool.” I responded then got quiet when she put glue on the breast form and placed it firmly on my chest. She repeated the step on the right side then said she was finished. Sally then showed me how to conceal the edges of the forms with make-up.
“There, all done, you can put your bra back on honey.”
I paused for several seconds staring at my chest in the mirror.
“Honey when you get the real thing, you’ll be in front to a mirror for hours, I remember doing that when mine started to bloom.” She said smiling the closing her eyes as if remembering something.
I finally had my fill and put my bra and top back on and left the changing room to show Janice.
“My now that’s better isn’t it?” Janice asked and noticed my beaming smile.
“Oh, my yes and I am so thankful,” I started to tear up and gave her a hug. “Thank you mom, I love you.”
“You’re welcome my dear new daughter, I love you to.”
We were soon on our way to the mall, and once there we walked over to David’s Bridal.
“You’re smiling brightly” Janice said looking at me “Spill.”
“I just love the way these feel when I walk.” I said indicating my new breast.
Janice just smiled at me and nodded. “Watching you mature into a young woman is going to be such a joy Sandra.” She then gave me a hug.
As we entered the store we went over to the display of prom dresses that had been set up for prom season. The store had been separated into sections one side for wedding apparel and the other side was for formal.
I was soon overwhelmed by all the beautiful dresses hanging around the store. All the lovely colors and silky material were sending my mind into overdrive as a gently touched the material of gorgeous lavender dress. I was drawn to it as if by instinct. I had found a Lovely Satin and Lace Empire Cut Long Formal Dress with a semi mermaid cut and a spaghetti strap top.
“What a wonderful choice Sandra, It’s perfect. Would you like to try it on?”
“Of course I would.” I said beaming.
We found one in my size and looked for someone to help us.
“Hi, can I help you with something?” A very pretty woman in her thirties asked.
“Yes we would, Sandra here would like to try on this dress.”
“Oh, that is a nice dress, and it suits your completion very well” She held the dress up to me and it fell to the floor and I just loved how it felt when I held it. “Here go ahead and go into this changing room, holler if you need any help, just asks for Melanie.”
“Go ahead Sandra, I’ll wait our here for you.” Janice said as she sat in a chair outside the changing room.
I pulled off my shoes, and placed my skirt and top on one of hooks provided. I then carefully pulled the dress over my head. I shuddered as the silky material fell into place around me. I ran my hands down my sides and I tingled with excitement. Oh no, I thought, my panties are not going to be able to hide my growing appreciation for this dress. What am I going to do? I looked at my reflection in the mirror and there was no hiding how I felt about this dress. I tried to readjust, but it was too painful to push back between my legs.
“Mom, Janice, I need a little advice in here.” I said with panic in my voice.
“What is it dear?” I turned around with embarrassment. She could not help but chuckle. “Oh my, um…It’ll be ok Sandra; I will think of something,” She paused a second and then said “try and think about wearing boy’s clothes, maybe that will help.” Janice quickly walked out, I assume to let things calm down a bit.
“I tried my best, and I thought about how it felt to wear boy underwear just ten short days ago.” Oh how icky I thought then calmed down enough to push myself away safely hidden with a smooth front. I will definitely have to see if we could ask Sally if she had something that might help me out of situations like this.
“Mom, I’m ok now.” I said and stepped out of the dressing room; I got a glance at myself in the bigger mirror across the store and fell in love with the dress.
“You look stunning Sandra; you’re going to send Brian over the edge when he sees you in that,” Janice said beaming with pride. All I could think was, ‘I certainly hope so.’
“What a beautiful dress for such a lovely young woman.” Melanie said walking up to us holding a pair of 2” lavender pumps. “I thought these would be perfect for your daughter.” Mother and daughter, I loved how that sounded, as I said it few times in my mind. I knew then that Janice is my mom now.
The shoes matched the dress perfectly. I stumbled a bit as I walked around and I got used to my heels.
“First time in heals I guess, just walk around the store while you mother and I bring this up.”
“Yes please, I just love this dress.” I said walking around the store and quickly got used to the pumps. As I walked around I bumped into Kim.
“Hey Sandra, I see you’ve found a lovely dress.” Kim looked at my chest strangely and then smiled.
“Yah thanks, you too?” I asked the obvious.
“Yep, I’m here with Brenda.” She turned to the changing room next to the one I was just in and out walked Brenda in a nice plumb colored sheath dress with a plunging neckline.
“Hi Sandy, Kim what do you think,” Brenda said with a feminine glow.
“Sexy my dear, don’t you agree Sandy.” Kim asked me.
“Very nice. I’ve got to get going, I need to change and I have a lot more shopping to get done. I’ll see you later ok.”
“Ok Sandy we will see you later.” Brenda said.
“By Brenda, Kim I’ll see you Monday at school.”
As mom completed the transaction with Melanie I changed back into my regular clothes. Once back out into the store after changing I found mom holding the dress carrier and a box with the shoes in another bag. She handed me the dress bag and we walked towards the door.
“Have a nice day ladies, come back again anytime.” Melanie said waving as we left.
“Sandra you have wonderful taste and you picked out a very lovely dress. But next time you must try on more than one dress.” She told me, I thought she was mad at me now.
“I’m sorry mom; I’ll be a better girl next time.”
“Honey, I love it when you call me mom, but you did nothing wrong sweetie, it’s just as women we have the distinct privilege to try on multiple types of clothes when shopping, even if you don’t plan on buying something we always try it on.” She said teaching me how to be a proper woman.
“Thanks mom, I’ll remember that. Um…I hope you don’t mind me calling you mom, I know you and dad aren’t married yet.”
“No not at all, as long as I can refer to you as my daughter.”
“I would like nothing more.” I then gave her a hug and wiped a tear from my eye.
“None of that Sandra, you’ll ruin your makeup.” She said teasing. “Now let’s go see if our boys need help with picking out a tux.” She said which made me laugh.
We made our way to the Men’s Warehouse and met up with Dad and Brian who were just finishing looking at cummerbunds.
“Oh good you’re here, I see you have a dress bag, just in time to get a matching cummerbund.” Dad said then got a good look at me and his eyes went wide. “I knew you were going to Sally’s but I never guessed you would look so natural.” He said then gave me a hug and whispered in my ear. “I’m kind of jealous you know.” I was a little surprised and whispered back.
“Daddy” I said in mock disgust then I hugged him tighter and wondered if he would ever dress up again. But for now I think he is more worried about me.
Brian got a good look as well and then whistled. “You look great, wow.”
I didn’t realize having these forms would make such a big difference in my appearance.
“Thank you Brian, dad” I then unzipped the dress bag and as I pulled it out I heard gasps from both of them.
“My now that is a gorgeous dress you have Sandy.” Dad said as I draped it across my arm. “Ok now let’s pick out the perfect one.”
We all looked around and mom found the perfect cummerbund to match my dress. Once we looked at it in the light I carefully put the dress back into the bag. The sales guy came by and asked if Brian was ready to see if everything fit.
When Brian came out all dress up I couldn’t help but smile. He looked stunningly handsome. I thought about putting a little blush on his cheeks to bring them out then giggled out loud that I was thinking about something like that.
“What’s so funny Sandy?” Brian asked.
“It’s nothing, I just thought of something funny.”
“You think I look like a dork, don’t you.” Brian said with a frown.
“No Brian you look fantastic.” I said.
“Then what?” He said wanting to know.
“Look I just thought I could put blush on your cheeks to make them stand out more, then giggled that I thought of that.” Boys can be such babies sometimes.
“You know Brian Sandra is right, it would bring out your cheeks and make you just so much more handsome.” She teased.
“Mom, that’s not funny.” He said then smiled at me. “On the other hand I would do anything for you Sandra.”
I could not help but blush at that statement then thought about actually asking him to see what he would look like. After changing back into his street clothes Brian joined us at the counter. After settling the rental price we were told we could pick up the tux Thursday afternoon.
“We can pick it up after my appointment with Thelma. Brian I would like you to go with me. I have something to discuss with you.” Brian gave me a confused look. “I tell you and Thelma Thursday ok, it’s actually a good thing.”
“Ok.”
“Well now that the shopping is over with lots of time to spare, how about we men take our ladies to a movie then dinner afterwards?”
Mom and I both agreed.
“I think mom and I would love a movie.”
“Sandra, you just called Janice mom, that’s wonderful.” Dad said with a huge smile.
“Yes, I know. I see her as my mom now; I know you will not mind.” I looked at his broad smile and knew that he was pleased.
“I’m very pleased; it means you’ve accepted Janice as my future wife and a mother to you. I could not be happier, as I am with you and Brian as a couple.”
“Thanks dad.” I said then gave him another hug.
After our short emotional pause the guys took us to the movie theater and asked us what we would like to see.
“Terminator Salvation is what I would like to see” I said quickly “The previews were pretty cool.”
“Sounds good to me what do you think about it?” Dad asked mom.
“Ok with me” Mom responded.
“Cool, I really want to see that” answered Brian eagerly.
We bought our tickets, popcorn and drinks, we then picked seats in the crowded theater. Soon the movie started and Brian and I were cuddling. I looked over at dad, and he and mom were doing the same. Once the movie was over we talked about how much better the movie could have been and then headed out. Mom and I stopped by the restroom and fixed our lipstick before coming back out. I stopped a second and asked her the question that was looming on my mind.
“Mom I was thinking, do you think Sally has a device that will help with what happened in the dressing room earlier?” I asked quietly.
“I am sure she does, we will just have to go by after church tomorrow and ask.”
“Ok thanks for understanding.”
“That’s what I’m here for sweetie, to answer all your questions no matter how embarrassing they may be. Remember that you can ask me anything you wish, even about sex, when you’re ready of course.
“Thanks mom, I love you.” I gave her a quick hug.
“What a nice mother, daughter talk.” Some unknown woman said as we walked out and joined the boys and made our way to the parking lot.
“Have a nice chat in the bathroom ladies?” Dad asked.
“Just girl talk David, if you must know.” Mom answered giving me a knowing look.
“I think Outback Steak House sound good for diner.” Dad said while we were getting into the truck.
The line waiting to get into Outback was not too long thankfully and we were seated in about twenty minutes. We had a nice quiet dinner and we all enjoyed talking about the spring dance and what was planned for mom and dad’s wedding.
We were soon on our way home with a bag of leftovers. The sun was just getting low in the sky as we pulled onto our street. I noticed my grandparents (from my mom’s side) car in front of our house, I called my grandfather ‘Papa’. I was scared because I knew my grandfather was ultra religious and I felt butterflies in my stomach as we pulled into our driveway.
Brain was the first out of the car and rushed to his house to use the bathroom followed by the rest of us.
“Hello Francis, Melisa how are you doing?” Dad asked as he greeted them.
“We are doing great, thanks for asking David. We came by to see how you and Tim were doin…” She stopped mid sentence when she got a good look at me as I came into view from around the back of the truck.
“What the hell is going on here, why in heaven is Tim dressed as a girl? This is an abomination against God. You!” Granddad pointed at me “Get the hell out of that dress.”
“I will not, this is who I am!” I said sternly and standing up for myself.
“Dad, you need to calm down, Sandra is my daughter and I will raise her as she needs to be raised and not by some outdated rules written thousands of years ago.” Dad shouted at granddad almost in his face.
Grandma had a pissed look on her face and got in between dad and granddad. She was suddenly pushed away.
“Out of my way woman, this is between me and these heathens.” Granddad yelled and grabbed my arm. “Tim is coming with me to get this demon cleansed from his soul now!”
“The hell she is Dad, you will let go of my daughter right now.” Dad yelled.
“Don’t you call me Dad you son of a bitch, this is between me and Tim, he obviously needs spiritual guidance and I will see that he gets it.” Granddad continued to pull me away towards his car. I was terrified and he was hurting me.
“Papa, you’re hurting me” I cried “Please let me go.” I then saw that grandma was already on the phone and just hung up. I continued to struggle against him.
“Get in the car now unclean one, do not struggle I’ll hurt you more.” He screamed and tried to pick me up but I was staying firmly on the ground using all my weight, he was not strong enough to pick me up. I soon heard the relieving sound of an approaching police car. It pulled up and a familiar cop got up, screaming at Papa.
“Let go of that girl now.” Officer Thompson ordered.
“This is my grandson, and I am taking this deviant to get cleansed, this is none of your business Officer.” Granddad said definitely.
“No, I said to let her go. You will be arrested if you do not immediately comply.” He ordered again.
Granddad reluctantly let me go. “You must know that this is a boy standing here and I am going to see that he is saved.” He said to the cop.
“Ben you know our family and Sandra’s history. Francis is confused as to her gender identity and started a ruckus.” Dad explained.
“No Mr. Simmons, you will leave this girl alone, I have your license number and I saw you assaulting this innocent girl. If I see you here again without permission I will arrest you for trespassing.” Officer Thompson explained to him.
“Innocent, this ‘girl’ you say is going against everything that Leviticus said in the bible.” Granddad spouted out, I always hated it when he quoted bible law that has been outdated since Jesus spoke to his disciples as Pastor Gene had taught us.
“I am a girl Papa, you just have to get past your prejudices and accept me how I am.” I said now fully crying.
“Now I ask that you leave and calm down, and maybe you can call us and talk.” Dad said.
“Not in my life time, let’s go home and away from these deviants Melisa.”
“No, I am staying here with them.” Grandma said angrily.
“Fine with me, I’m out of here.” Grandfather said and squealed the tires as he left in a hurry.
“I am so sorry,” Grandma said and held open her arms to me. “I never thought in a million years he would react this way. Your mother told me about you years ago and I never told Papa as I knew he would reject this but not like he did.” She then hugged me and started to cry with me.
“Its ok grandma, I’m just sorry that he will miss out on me growing into a woman and getting married.” I said then grabbed Brian into a half hug as an introduction. I then wiped my tears from my eyes.
“Well no matter what I will support you, even if that means leaving your grandpa, I will cross that bridge when it comes.” She said the looked at Brian. “And I’m guessing this strapping young lad is your boyfriend.”
“Yah, he is” I finally found my smile again “This is Brian.”
“This has been a rough night; I’ll pull out the spare bed for you Melisa. Oh, by the way this is my fiancée Janice.”
“Pleased to meet you” Grandma said shaking mom’s hand. “What’s in the bag? Sandra… right?”
“Sandy for short but yes, mom and I got it today at David’s Bridal.” I called her mom before I thought about it.
“Mom” grandma looked confused.
“I’m sorry grandma, with Janice getting married and me needing one I consider her my mom. I know she is not my real mom, but I need her. And just to be clear I will never forget my real mom.” I explained to her hoping she would understand.
“I don’t mind honey; I grew up without a mother from the age of 14, so I know exactly how you fell.” She said with a smile.
“Thanks for understanding grandma, now would you like to see the dress.”
“Would I ever” grandma said excitedly “how about you boys get the bed ready while we girls have a fashion show.”
Dad and Brian readily agreed and grandma followed mom and I up stairs. I opened my closet door and I hung up the dress bag and unzipped it.
Soon I was in my bra and panties, grandma noticed my new attributes.
“Are those real?” She asked confused, as she had just seen me a few weeks ago as a boy.
“No grandma however they are very life like aren’t they.” I said with what happened outside quickly fading away to the excitement of putting my dress on again.
“Yes, now let us see you in that dress.”
I finished with the dress and then slipped the pumps on and stood proudly for grandma and mom. Everything felt right about this dress and my soon to be night to remember with Brian.
“You look beautiful Sandra; I can’t believe I never got to see you before today. You mother was absolutely right to say you were just lovely.” Grandma said giving me a hug.
I soon had to take the dress off so I would not get it dirty before Saturday. We all then went back out to see how the boys were doing. We all sat together quietly for the rest of the night. No one had the energy to bring up what happened tonight. I soon felt myself being nudged awake from Brian’s lap. I guess I was drained, both physically and emotionally. I soon went to bed and fell asleep soon after putting on my nightie.
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Sandra’s Grandfather causes more problems and a few unexpected parishioners come to her aid. Chapter Eleven By Sara D. Edited by "Michelle B." Thank You!!! |
“Well good morning Mrs. Simmons,” Pastor Gene said with a smile, “It’s good to see you again. Where’s Mr. Simmons?”
Grandma looked a bit upset and turned red. “That man will not be welcome here today, as he is not a true Christian and accepting of Sandra,” She said angrily.
“Mrs. Simmons, you should know all are welcome in God’s house. Each of us is but forgiveness away from Life.” Pastor Gene said with a calming voice. “What by chance has he done to upset you? I may be able to help you.”
Grandma related what had happened the night before, Pastor Gene looked surprised and then upset when she was finished.
“Yes that is a reason to be upset, but you must forgive him or your heart will be clouded with hate and will not allow you to live,” Pastor Gene said. “And if you have a hard time with it. Prayers are the way to ask for help.”
We thanked Pastor Gene, and Grandma and I found seats in a pew a few rows from the front. We were sitting and waiting for dad, mom and Brian to join us. Dad had stopped to talk to Pastor Gene. Once done Pastor Gene shook dad’s hand and smiled brightly. Brian was nowhere to be found and I looked over at dad as he took a seat next to grandma and mom.
“Where is Brian? I don’t see him,” I asked.
“I’m not sure Sandy; he was just right behind us. Why don’t you go and look for him?” Dad suggested.
I got up, and using the side door, I made my way around to see what he was up to. As soon as I stepped around to the front of the church I saw Brian being shoved aside as grandpa made his way inside the doors. I saw the look of surprise on Brian’s face as he followed grandpa into the church. He has pushed is way through the parishioners being greeted by Pastor Gene and stood at the front of the church.
As soon as grandpa reached the front he began to spew with more anger than the night before. “Listen friends, I come to warn you that Satan is among us disguised as the deviant standing at the doors. That child needs to be sent away from this house of the Lord.” He spat while pointing at me. “This…This is no girl before you. That thing… is… was a boy and is an abomination before God.” He continued glaring at me and around at the people just taking their seats on an otherwise beautiful Sunday morning.
I’ve never seen Pastor Gene move so fast; he stood right next to my grandfather looking very displeased. “Sir, you are in my church and no one here is an abomination, all here are children of God, including the lovely young woman you are speaking about. Everyone is welcome here, regardless of their situation.” Pastor Gene told him.
“No Pastor, that thing is a boy and should live as God made him, not some sort of pervert.” Grandpa spat some more still glaring at me.
“This girl is welcome here anytime she pleases,” a guy in the middle shouted out.
“Yah, we all wish you to leave,” another said in agreement.
“You are all allowing Satan in your presence. You are all dammed and will burn in hell for allowing this,” Grandpa continued to argue.
“Sir, you are the first person in my 30 years as Pastor I have had to ask to leave. You are not welcome.” Pastor Gene said in disgust.
“I will not leave until all of you cast out this disgraceful child.” He said again pointing in my direction.
“Sir, you are now ordered to leave.” Officer Thompson said as he stood up. “Or I will arrest you for trespassing,” He said then spoke to Pastor Gene “with your permission of course.”
“Yes of course if he does not leave immediately you may do so.”
Grandpa huffed and puffed for a few seconds then must have made the only smart choice this morning and left the church, but had to have the last word as he stepped out of the door. “You are no longer my family; all of you can go to hell.” He screamed looking directly at me then over at dad and grandma who was now giving me a hug, then he slammed the door to the church and left.
Grandma hugged my tighter and looked at me as she wiped the tears from her eyes. “I am so sorry Sandra.” She said as dad also came over and hugged me tight.
Pastor Gene then spoke to everyone. “What you heard from that man was not what we here believe. Those who believe in such ideas are wrong. God loves all his children, Jesus died on the cross for us.” Pastor Gene then began the service. His message was of love, acceptance.
I felt better once the service was over and that grandpa would not ruin my relationship with God. We all thanked Pastor Gene as we walked out. The five of us piled into the truck and headed home. I was just staring out the window as we drove.
“Are you going to be alright sweetie?” Grandma asked.
“I’ll be ok grandma, it just hard to think about what grandpa said and believes,” I said as I felt tears in my eyes.
“We are all her for you Sandy,” Brian said as he held my hand “and remember I love you.” He then leant over and gave me a kiss on the lips.
“I love you to Brian.” I said and blushed as dad; mom and grandma were all looking at us smiling.
We drove a few minutes and arrived at the house with a surprise waiting for us, Linda, Brian’s sister was home.
“Linda my dear, it is good to see you,” mom said hugging her daughter. “When did you get here?”
“Just now, I had to visit once you called and let me know you were getting married and I was getting a new sister.” She said then gave me a smile. “You must be Sandra.” She then shook my hand then smiled, “Sisters hug.” She said and squeezed me into a nice warm hug. Linda then gently pushed me back and looked me over. “You look fantastic; I think I’m going to love having you as a sister. You’re much better looking than that lanky boy that I used to know.” She said and giggled.
I had to giggle too. “Thank you Linda, you can call me Sandy for short. Most of my friends do.”
“Nice to see you again Linda,” Brian said and gave his sister a small hug “you know um, Sandy and I are seeing each other right?” Brian said blushing.
“Yes, mom has told me all about you and Sandy. I think you make a wonderful couple.” She said then smiled. “Weird though.” She said and laughed obviously joking.
“Weird? Sandy and I love each other.” Brian said sounding hurt.
“I was kidding brother dear, I was only joking. You’re such a dumb ass sometimes. I was just thinking with mom marrying David that if you continue to date Sandra, and one day you’ll be marrying your sister.”
“Yah Brian, she was only kidding. I got the joke.” I told him then gave him a peck on the cheek.
“I know that, I was just pulling her leg to get a rise out of her.
“Let’s all go inside,” Mom said as she led us into her home “and have a nice talk.”
“That’s a nice Idea, I would love to talk to you all” Linda said then looked over at grandma “I’m sorry, you look familiar but I don’t know you.”
“Hello, I’m Melisa Simmons, Claudia’s mother.” Grandma said shaking Linda’s hand.
“Oh yah, nice to see you again, we met at the funeral.” Linda said somberly. “Sorry.”
Grandma looked a little pained as she probably remembered mom’s funeral. “Yes, it was a tough time for us all.” Grandma said then remained silent until we all reached mom’s kitchen and sat down. “Anyone else care for some tea?” Grandma asked.
“I would love some.” Mom said and got up and started gathering the pot and tea bags. Grandma got up and gave her a hand.
Linda didn’t wait long and started asking me all sorts of questions. “So Sandra, how long have you been a girl?” She asked.
“All of my life.” I told her.
“What I mean is how long have you been dressing as a girl?” She said and her hand on mine. I knew what she meant, but I wanted her to know that I have felt like a girl for all of my life.
“Almost two weeks full time, and off and on with my mom from the time I was young.” I answered honestly.
“Two weeks wow, you look to have been at it a lot longer than that. I would never guess you were once a boy meeting you for the first time.
Linda, Grandma, Mom and I continued to chat. Dad and Brian excused themselves to the garage to do guy stuff. Too much estrogen in the house for them I guess. We talked for hours and had several cups of tea and crackers. It was nice being one of the girls, and we talked about more than just me. Linda asked me about Brian, and the dance. Mom told her about the hotel after the dance. She asked about my dress, I told her I would show her it after dinner.
Later, Dad and Brian returned to the kitchen and asked if we wanted BBQ. We all agreed. Brian helped dad with the steaks, and I helped with the salad and bread. It turned out to be a nice day and great evening.
After we were all stuffed with meat and bread, Linda asked, “Can you show me that dress Sandy?”
“Sure” I answered, and led Linda into my house and to my room.
Linda looked around my room, possibly noticing the lavender color of the paint, my pink bedspread and makeup table. “Nice room, much different from before.” She said and sat on my bed.
“Thanks, don’t you want to see the dress?” I asked her, she looked un-interested.
“Sure.”
I grabbed the dress from the dress bag and showed it to her. She looked at it wide eyed. “That is a lovely dress Sandy, but I really just wanted to talk to you in private.”
“Oh, um... ok.” I said worried.
“I wanted to ask what you thought about my mom and your dad getting married and about you and Brian as well.”
“Sure, I think their getting married is great. I love her and I know dad loves her too. She’s been great to me, I consider her to me my new mom. I miss my true mom more than you can know, but I know in my heart that she is smiling from Heaven that I have her.”
“That’s good; I know she loves your dad. I just don’t know how to feel about it. It was kind of abrupt that mom called me and told me two days ago.” She said pausing, “She talked about you, about Brian and you a lot of things came out and I just wanted a chance to really talk to you.”
“I’m glad we have this chance, I’ve always been jealous of how feminine you are and your grace.” I told her honestly.
“Well thank you, I’ve always had suspicions that Brian had the hot’s for you before, and to see you together now is kind of confusing. Have you two slept together?”
“Not yet, but I want to badly,” I told her and asked, “Can I be frank with you?”
“Sure, that’s what future sisters are for,” Linda said smiling.
“I am happy, but I am still unsure of how I should proceed. Brian say’s he loves me as I am. I like the way it feels when I use my equipment. But in the back of my mind I still want to be a full woman. What’s it like to be with a man as a woman?” I asked her.
“You honestly want to know?” She asked looking embarrassed.
“Please,” I said trying to look innocent.
“First tell me what you and Brian have done so far.”
“Besides kissing I fondled him, he tried to touch me but I stopped him.”
“Ok, so you want to know what it’s like to have a guy inside of you.”
I nodded my head yes.
Linda then very graphically explained how it felt to be a woman with a man and how I might not feel the same. She told me about another girl like me she met at college. Her friend had said that the sex after a sex change was great but sounded different from her own experiences. This is something I will have to ask Thelma on Thursday.
“Thank you Linda for being so informative, it gives me something to think about and talk to my Therapist and Brian about. I hope he understands that I am conflicted about all of this.”
“I am sure that Brian will accept you no matter what Sandy. He obviously loves you and will treat you with respect.”
“Thanks Linda.” I told her then gave her a hug.
“You’re welcome; now let’s see how that dress fits you.”
I took of my other clothes and grabbed the dress.
“Are those real?” Linda indicated my new breasts.
“Not yet, but these are the best money can buy. Thanks to our mom.” I said smiling and hopping she would accept me saying ‘our’ mom.
“Mom always knew how to make me happy and feminine, now she has another daughter to play with.” She said giving me a hug.
“Thanks.” I simply said then wiggled my way into that wonderful dress. Once I had it on I twirled for Linda showing her.
“Wow, you look great in that. I know you’ll have Brian eating out of your hand next Saturday.”
“You think so?”
“Absolutely,” Linda said with a smile “I should be getting home now; it was nice talking with you Sandy.”
“Same here Linda. Thanks again and I hope we can be great sisters.”
“Me too,” she said giving me a hug “Bye Sandy.”
“Bye.” I walked her to the door and ran into dad coming back. “Hi dad.”
“Hey sweetie, did you show Linda your dress? You’ve been with her for a while.” He said innocently.
“Yah dad and we had a nice chat. Can I talk to you about something?” I asked knowing it was time to tell him about my thoughts.
“Sure honey, what’s the matter?” He said and invited me to sit with him at the couch.
I sat down and let my feelings flow. How I felt about wanting and not wanting to change at the same time. How I wanted to be with Brian as I am now, and as a complete woman at the same time. I told him I felt conflicted, and thanked him for the opportunity he and mom were giving us next Saturday, but I told him I had these feelings.
Dad sat there looking stunned for a few seconds before speaking. “You know I love you no matter what Sandra. It’s your decision on how to go forward, sex is an important part of any long term relationship, but not the only part. You must find what is right for you. Don’t make a decision you will not be happy with for the sake of another. This is something I am sure you will deal with for a while until you figure out what you want. Let me ask you this, are you a boy in a dress, or are you a girl?”
“I’m a girl dad. I know that for sure. It’s just that I get excited by the clothes and I like how it feels when I… you know.” I told him honestly.
“From what Dr. Louis has told us, those feelings will fade with time as you continue on your hormones.”
“What about taking medication to keep me partly a boy.” I then related what Kelly had said in her email.
“That’s a crock, when I was in my 20’s before the Navy, I looked into that. It’s all a sham and the drugs they give you are harmful. Don’t even explore that, Promise me.”
“Ok dad, Thanks for listening.” I said feeling a bit down at hearing it may not be possible to get the best of both worlds as I thought I wanted it.
“Honey this is something you will have to talk to Dr. Louis about.” He finally said.
“Your right dad, I am sure she will explain and help me to figure this out. Night dad.”
“Good night sweetie, by the way you look wonderful in that dress.” He then gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek.
“Thanks.” I then went up to my room took off the dress and went to bed.
I woke the next morning from a dream I had. I was a complete woman and was with Brian. It felt so real, and I had feelings of this is how it should be.
Monday was the usual start to the week and wasn’t any different for me, it was the same because Brain and I walked to school as normal. We were joined by Amy and Gina and we were all soon talking about the dance. Brian let it slip about the hotel, and I was expecting outrage.
“You guys are so lucky; I wish my parents would allow Paul and me to do that.” Gina said jealously.
“Me too. My parents would kill me if I even suggested such a thing.” Amy said as we arrived at school.
The school was bustling with activity and we soon were seeing the posters for the spring dance showing it to be formal, thanks to my friends. We had gotten together as a class and decided a formal dance would be great and everyone we talked to was talking about how cool it would be to have a formal dance for the junior’s and were all excited about Saturday.
The rest of the week went by quickly and I was soon in the waiting room at Thelma’s office.
I entered Thelma’s cozy office and was greeted by her. “Good afternoon Sandra, how was your week?”
“It was busy.” I simply said. I then related all that had happened with grandpa, the time at the hotel and how I felt about me, the email, and the dream. I left nothing out.
“Sandra, you are a complicated girl. You have feelings that a few like you have had. It’s just a way for you to try and figure it out. And yes it’s true that there is only one path, male or female. The hormones that you are one will ensure you have a feminine body and the blockers your on will prevent you from developing as a male. Are you having second thought?”
“Absolutely not, I am a girl.” I said almost screaming.
“I was just checking to see if you are sure yourself. Look these feeling although rare are normal. This dream of yours could be how thing should be, but a dream is just that. Explore your feelings, but be careful this Saturday and expect the unexpected. You may be surprised.” She said finishing.
Thelma concluded our session talking more about the changes I will experience with the hormone use and how my brain will ultimately change as well. I might see things differently, or my femininity will be enhanced.
I left feeling better about being able to voice my feelings and concerns and I was soon thinking about the dance.
Friday came and went quickly. The only thing of note was that Brenda and Kim were more open about their relationship and had gained a few female friends along with Amy, Gina and I as we chatted during lunch.
Saturday I woke early and was welcomed in the living room by Linda, mom and grandma who said they were all here to help me get ready.
“It’s so early what needs to be done?”
Mom responded, “Everything my dear. I made an appointment at your mom’s salon for nails, hair and makeup. I invited your friends Amy and Gina, to meet us there.” I could not help but smile at the idea.
Dad drove us to the mall and parked the car. He and Brian planned to go to the movies while we girls were primped and prodded.
We were greeted at my mom’s salon ‘Claudia’s’ by Marge the manager and her assistant Mindy.
Marge, who had been mom’s closest friend at the salon before she died, led me to her station and began working on my nails. Mindy began working on Amy and Gina waited patiently for the other girl to become available.
Marge expertly filed and polished my nails. While I was under the nail dryer, she began working on Gina. Amy was soon seated next to me and we were both admiring our nails. Mine were a dark pink, and Amy’s were a light red. Once the machine beeped its completion Marge washed and then began to style my hair. It was much longer than the last time and I was happy to be without a wig. Once I was done, Marge talked me through the steps she was taking to enhance my features and what type of make-up she was using.
Almost three hours later all three of us were done and admiring each other in the salon mirrors. I thought all three of us looked fabulous. I was startled by two handsome guys whistling their approval when dad and Brian walked into the salon to pick us up.
Both men had the look of astonishment on their faces and they took in what Marge and Mindy were able to do for us. I was impressed as I know they were too.
“Wow you look great!” Brian was the first to find his voice, “I’m going to be the luckiest guy at the dance tonight.” He then looked over at Gina and Amy "And Paul and Matt I am sure will feel the same way.”
“Thanks.” All three of us said at the same time. Dad then drove us all home, us girls agreed that we would meet at my house and then have the limo take us to the dance from there.
Once I got home I had to pry myself away from Brian, he was in awe and didn’t hesitate to let me know.
“Brian, I have to get ready, I’m going to my room to put the dress on and you need to go get into you tux.”
“Your right as always my love, I will see you shortly.” He said trying to kiss me.
I held him away for a moment, “You will have to wait, for right now I don’t want you messing up my makeup. He walked away like a sad puppy.
I first put on the powder blue satin panties and matching strapless bra. I made sure my breasts were glued securely and then stepped into panty hose, I then followed with the dress with mom’s help and grandma zipped me up. The satin of that lavender dress felt wonderful. I pushed those thought from my mind and mom handed me my 2” pumps and I slipped them on. Both mom and Grandma smiled as I stood and twirled around. I saw my reflection in the mirror and knew what I was doing was right. I thought to myself, I am a girl and I knew what that meant, and I also knew I had to tell Brian tonight.
“What’s the matter sweetie?” Mom asked as I wiped a tear from my eyes, careful not to mess up my mascara.
“I just realized how much I love being a girl, and I don’t want to disappoint Brian.” I said regaining my composure.
“Listen honey, I know with assurance that my Brian loves you with all his heart. He always has, and no matter what you decide to do physically, he will support you.” Mom told me then gave me a hug.
“You are a unique woman and you are lucky to have such an amazing man at sixteen.” Grandma said joining the hug.
“Thanks you two, I appreciate your support and understanding.”
“You’re welcome. Now how about we go down stairs and break the hearts of the young men waiting there,” mom said smiling. “Just give us a few seconds to get into the living room first.”
“Ok,” I said and waited a minute to let them get to the living room.
As I stepped onto the bottom step I was announced.
“Arriving is our princess, Sandra.” Mom said proudly.
I stepped into the living room and was greeted by the flash of dad’s camera and the audible gasp of Brian.
“My God, Sandra you’re beautiful, you are truly a princess.” Brian said admiring me with the cutest smile.
I took his arm as he offered me corsage. “It’s beautiful, thank you.” Brian finished pinning the corsage on left side of my dress. Once he was done I kissed him. We were both in a sea of flashes from dad’s camera.
“You two make a wonderful and cute couple.” Dad said finally lowering the camera. The doorbell rang and Amy, Matt, Gina and Paul came in.
“Wow you all look nice.” Mom said to them. We were all then grouped together for more pictures first as couples, then just the girls and lastly just the guys.
Soon we were driving away in the limo waving to my parents and on our way. Once we arrived at the dance hall we could not see one couple that had not dressed up. Amy and I were glad that the idea had caught on. Everyone looked nice; most of the students were gathered around the tables and chatting. Our group found an empty table and set our stuff on the chairs. Brain and I grabbed our snack plates and made our way to the buffet table. The food looked great and I could tell everyone was enjoying themselves.
We finished eating and then hit the dance floor. The music was mostly new but the DJ threw in some classic rock and slow dance music from time to time. Brian and I were on the dance floor for almost an hour. We bumped into Brenda and Kim who seemed to be enjoying each other’s company. Both of them were beautifully dressed, each of them had on dresses that complemented the other.
About fifteen minutes later Kim came up to us in a panic. “Have either of you seen Brenda?”
“Not since we bumped into you earlier.” I told her.
“Dam, I knew I should have gone with her to the bathroom. She had to use it but I was talking with Mrs. Sherman.” She said in one breath. “We have to find her. I saw her talking to some guy by the door just before she went into the bathroom and haven’t seen her since. I checked the bathroom and all inside. Can you guys help me find her?”
“Of course, I’ll check both bathrooms again, Brian can you check outside?” I asked.
“Sure, I’ll check the parking lot and the back side as well.” Brian made his way to the front door.
“Kim you should go talk to Principal Sherman and make sure she knows we are looking for Brenda.” I suggested.
“I already did, I’ll go with you and help you check the bathrooms and behind the stage.” She recommended.
Kim and I checked and could not find Brenda anywhere inside, so we went outside to help Brian. I knew it was important to find Brenda, girls like us need to stick together.
When we got outside we both turned as we heard a loud scream. We saw a man pushing Brenda against the back wall and push a knife into Brenda’s stomach. The ear piercing scream could be heard across the parking lot. I then saw Brian run toward the guy.
“Hey!” Brian yelled at the guy and took after him tackling the offender into some bushes around the corner.
We then heard a quick chirp of a siren on the other side of the building. Kim stopped to take care of Brenda and I ran to see what happened around the corner. I saw the cop get out of his car and place Brian and the guy in handcuffs. ‘Oh no. Now what?’ I thought as I approached them.
“That tall guy attacked my friend around the corner!” I said screaming.
The officer pushed both of them into the back of his car and drove around the corner to see about Brenda. I ran up to Kim who was on the phone with 911. The cop got out of the car and checked on Brenda’s condition and started calling for an ambulance. He then grabbed a bag out of his car, told us to keep clear and told Kim to hold the cloth over the wound while he called for backup.
Two more police cars showed up. He told them to look for the knife in the bushes and directed the ambulance crew over to Brenda as soon as it showed up. Other students started coming out of the dance obviously hearing the sirens. Mrs. Sherman was close behind them, she gasped as she got up to us.
“My God what happened to Brenda?” She said fidgeting.
“She was… she was attacked by that man in the cop car…” Kim hardly got out.
“Who? Brian?” Mrs. Sherman asked only seeing Brian through the back door?
“No, the other one” as I pointed to the dirt bag behind Brian.
The EMT’s quickly gathered up Brenda and left for the hospital. The cops separated Kim and I and questioned us. I told the first cop that I heard the scream and turned to see him stab Brenda and Brian run after him. He then got the same story from Kim. He let Brian out of the car and asked for his side. He told the cop that he saw Brenda trying to get away from the man but the creep ‘his words’ had pushed Brenda against a wall and then heard her scream as he saw him stab Brenda in the stomach. He then ran after the bastard to stop him from getting away. The cop took the cuffs off of Brian and thanked him.
The cops had found the knife and questioned almost everyone. We were all shocked as we did not know why that man had attacked Brenda; he was conveniently being quite once he was arrested.
We were told by Mrs. Sherman that she would contact our parents and that the dance was concluded. I told her we were going to take Kim to the hospital and check on Brenda. I then got on my cell and let dad know what was going on and were we were going. He said he and his mom would meet us at the hospital.
We found our limo driver and he quickly got us to the Hospital. Gina’s mom had showed up and took her and Amy home, along with their dates. When we arrived we found that Brenda was being seen in the ER. Brenda’s father showed up just behind us and frantically asked the ER staff about his daughter’s condition.
A doctor I recognized came out shortly and spoke. “Mr. Chambers, I’m doctor Jenson, your daughter was stabbed in the abdomen, and the knife thankfully it appears to have missed any major organs but did nicked her large intestine. She has been taken surgery to take care of that and to check for other injuries. I will let surgeon talk to you when she gets out of surgery.”
“Thank you Dr. Jenson. Do you know what might happen?”
“No, the surgeon will be best to answer those questions; surgery is on the second floor. I’m sorry but minors are not allowed up there.” He said looking at Kim, Brian and I.
“Look kids, I know you are now close to Brenda, and I thank you for that. I will give your dad a call and let you know what happens.” Just then Dad and mom both walked in followed by haggard red headed women.
“Kimmy, what happened.”
“Mom,” Kim looked as if she saw a ghost. “My date was attacked and stabbed at the dance.” Kim said in a panic.
I was confused as I looked at both their reactions and Mr. Chambers’ reaction. Mom and dad looked confused too.
“Brenda was attacked by a man who was outside the dance, but I tackled him before he could get away.” Brian told Mrs. Sanders.
“Who’s Brenda?” Mrs. Sanders asked looking even more confused than before.
Kim looked as she was about to puke “my date.”
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The story continues at the hospital, with Brenda’s life on the line everyone is on edge. A short chapter. Chapter Twelve By Sara D. |
“Kimmy, what happened.”
“Mom,” Kim looked as if she saw a ghost. “My date was attacked and stabbed at the dance.” Kim said in a panic.
I was confused as I looked at both their reactions and Mr. Chambers’ reaction. Mom and dad looked confused too.
“Brenda was attacked by some man that was outside the dance, but I tackled him before he could get away.” Brian told Mrs. Sanders.
“Who’s Brenda?” Mrs. Sanders asked looking even more confused than before.
Kim looked as she was about to puke “my date.”
“Your date” Mrs. Sanders said as she sat next to her on the bench seat? “Are you telling me you went to the dance with another girl?” She took a deep breath. “It’s ok if you did.” And Mrs. Sanders comforted her daughter by taking her hand in hers.
“Sort of” Kim said squeezing her mom’s hand. “Can we talk about this later; I just want to hear how Brenda’s doing.”
“Sure honey, let’s go see how your friend is doing.” Mrs. Sanders said calmly.
“That’s a good idea” Mr. Chambers said “I need to see if she’s going to be ok.” He was visibly shaken as he pushed the button on the elevator control.
As we all reached the nurses’ station, an older gray haired nurse showed us into the surgery waiting room. We all sat down except for Mr. Chambers, obviously stressed over the situation.
“Do you know how my daughter Brenda Chambers is doing?” Mr. Chambers asked the nurse.
“I know she was rushed into surgery, and I can’t tell you more than that at this point. Dr. Morris and his team will do everything they can, and will update you on her condition as soon as they can. Until then I suggest you try and rest while you wait.” The nurse said as she went back to her counter.
We all tried to pass the time with outdated magazines and channel surfing with the television in the waiting room. Mr. Chambers alternated from sitting on a chair to passing the room several time in the past hour. Brian and I kept fiddling with our clothes the entire time; Brian was fiddling with his bow tie while I continued to smell my corsage and nervously pulled on my necklace. I pulled my cell phone from my purse and informed dad of what had happened and that Brian and I were ok and were waiting in the hospital. He told me to call him back as soon as I learned more.
Amy, Matt, Gina and Paul were picked up shortly after I hung up and taken home by Amy’s parents. Amy and Gina both asked me to call them and give both of them updates.
About and two hours into our waiting I was staring at the clock and just before 11pm a doctor walked into the waiting room with a very grim face. And as I looked into his face I could feel in the pit of my stomach and my head started to spin and in the my heart I just knew he had bad news.
Mr. Chambers stood up from his half seated position and faced the Doctor as he walked in.
“Mr. Chambers, I’m Dr. Morris the ER surgeon, I have news about your daughter Brenda.” He said somberly, you could see the blood drain from Mr. Chambers face and Dr. Morris began again. “Your daughter was brought in with severe damage to her lower abdomen and groan area, it took us several hours to repair her tissue and we were able to stop the bleeding. As of right now she is stable but critical condition.”
“Oh thank God” Mr. Chambers said and sat down with relief.
“Your daughter is going to have a long recovery ahead of her, most importantly we need to watch for infection and keep a close watch on her groin area. We were able to stitch her up well enough for now, but since there is excessive swelling in the area we have to closely watch her so that she does not lose use of her genitalia.” He said the last part quietly as to protect her secret.
“It’s ok Doctor, everyone here knows about her former self and she is seeing a therapist to transition at some point.” I looked over and saw a very confused look on Mrs. Sanders Face. “What do you think the outcome will be?” Mr. Chambers asked.
“Like I said, it will be touch and go from here, abdominal surgery has risks of infection, we found a few small injuries in her intestine and cleaned the area as best we could, but the risk is still there for infection and your daughter needs to be closely watched for now. She’s in recovery now and should be awake in a few hours. If you wish to stay here Mr. Chambers that is your decision, as for her friends, visiting hours are 8 am to 10 am and 4pm to 10pm, and I recommend you let her get some rest until tomorrow evening before to many visitors come to see her.”
“Thank you Dr. Morris” Mr. Chambers told him as he gave the doctor a handshake. Dr. Morris then walked out and then Mr. Chambers turned to us. “Thank you all for being here to support Brenda and giving me the support I need at this time as well. You all must be tired, and I am sorry you missed out on your night. Kim you are welcome to come by and see Brenda any time you wish.” Mr. Chambers said and gave her a hug.
“Thank you Mr. Chambers, I know it’s going to be a rough road ahead and I will support Brenda all I can.” Kim said turning to her mother.”
Mr. Chambers turned to the rest of us “Thank you all for being here for Brenda and me” he said “It’s been a tough road for us all.” He finished and half smiled at while glancing at me, in an obvious attempt to apologize for things past.
Brian and I gave our goodbyes and left the hospital, while Kim went home with her mother. I pulled out my cell and texted Amy and Gina about what the doctors had told us. I then called my dad and told him that Brian and I were on our way home.
When we arrived home both mom and dad gave us big hugs as we got out of the now empty limo. “I am so glad you two are alright” dad said while squeezing me tight. “And you too Brian, Mrs. Sherman explained what had happened and I am very proud of what you did.” Brian smiled and thanked dad then told him “Officer Thompson will be here in the morning just to get your statement; he also said he wanted to thank you as well.
“Ok, I’ll be ready.” Brian simply said.
“Well I am tired and need sleep.” I told everyone.
“You’ve both had a long night, I am sorry it did not go well” Mom said “good night to both of you, I’ll help you with your dress Sandy.”
With mom’s help my dress was off and in its carrier in no time. “Good night sweetheart” she said and kissed me on the cheek, “sleep well.”
“Thanks, you too” I said returning the kiss on the cheek.
As I turned to my mirror to clean off my make up, I couldn’t help but think to myself ‘Is this all worth it.”
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Here is the last chapter for Sandra and her gang of friends.
“WARNING: TEAR JERKER ALERT” YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. The Final Chapter By Sara D. |
Of course I am silly I reassured myself.
I shook that thought from my fussy morning brain. I dressed in a simple pair of peach shorts and t-shirt before joining the rest of my new family. As I entered the bacon aroma filled kitchen I saw that mom and dad were close together at the stove, mom with the bacon and dad with the eggs. Brian had just placed the O.J. on the table and reached for glasses and smiled as he noticed me enter the room. I quickly scanned the kitchen and grabbed the needed plates, silverware and napkins.
We all sat and had a nice breakfast, mom and dad continued to snuggle close, and mom constantly nestled her head on dad’s shoulder as he ate his last few bites. Once we were done with cleaning up, we all gathered in the family room waiting for Officer Thompson to show. We were quietly watching TV when the doorbell rang at 10 o’clock.
“Good morning Ben” Dad said as he greeted Officer Thompson at the door “come on in; please have a seat in the living room.”
“Thank you” Officer Thompson said as he greeted the rest of us.
“Would you like some coffee?” Mom offered as she got up to go to the kitchen.
“Yes, please. Black” Officer Thomson said as he shook Brian’s hand. “Good morning Brian, I must say that we at the station are thankful you are ok, while a dangerous act in stopping that man last night, you did the right thing.”
“Thank you Officer Thompson” Brian said and then sat on the couch next to me.
“You may both call me Ben” He said as he sat on a chair next to the coffee table.
“Here’s your coffee” Mom said and handed Ben a cup, she then joined dad on the sofa across from the couch.
“Thank you Janice” Ben said as he raised his cup. “Brian now what I would like to do is record your statement for the record of what occurred last night. Once we are complete here I will transcribe it and then bring it back in a few days for you to sign. Does that sound ok?” Ben asked.
“Sure, that’s ok with me.” Brian told Ben.
“Ok then” Ben pulled a small digital recorder from his pocket; a beep was heard as he pressed a button “Officer Ben J. Thompson badge number 387 Sunday April 16, recording the official statement of Brian Allen Jones regarding case #11-15-2236. What follows is the statement of record. Please state your full name and address for the record please Brian.” Ben then pointed the recorder towards Brian.
Brian then began “I am Brian Allen Jones of…” he gave a full account of what he saw and left nothing out. I could not help but smile at him, such a trooper.
Once completed Ben then spoke into the recorder once again “this concludes the statement of Brian Allen Jones for case number…” He then stood up and thanked all of us. “Thank you again, I’ll be in touch with you soon, if you remember anything else here is my card.” He said as he handed a white piece of paper to Brian. “One more thing” he said as he stood close to Brian “like you, your father was a very brave man. And I for one live each and every day thankful for what he did for me all those years ago.” He said as he gave Brian a friendly squeeze of his shoulder.
Brian and I both gave him a blank stare; I then remembered the story dad had told us about him and Brian’s father. “Remember Brian, the story my dad told us.”
“Oh yah,” Brain said with a smile “So you’re the one my dad’s actions saved.
“He’s the one” Ben said with a smile then shook Brian’s hand once again then took his leave of us. I’ll be in touch.
The rest of the day went slowly, with church being back to normal and Pastor Gene being his jovial self made for a nice sermon. As we all sat at the table to relax after church and a late lunch the phone rang.
“Hello” dad answered the phone and sat down “speaking.” He responded to the obvious question. I then saw his facial expression change from hope to utter despair and horror. “No!” He exclaimed “When, how?” He said now visually upset. He listened for several minutes, I watched in uneasy anticipation for him to tell us all what was going on, what happened. My heart was beating faster and I was sweating now as all I could think about was Brenda.
Dad hung up the phone softly and then looked straight at me with sad eyes. My heart began to sink as I knew it was bad news.
“Sandra, Brian” he began somberly “I am very sorry, but Brenda passed away this morning.” He said visually shaken.
“What, How!” I said screaming and began to cry “Oh my God; why???” I said between crying, I then felt Brian squeeze close to me. I looked at him and he too was visually shaken.
“A blood clot got into her brain and cause a stroke, the stroke caused her to stop breathing…” He stopped mid sentence because it was too hard to continue then he took a deep breath. The doctors worked on her but were unable to bring her back.” Dad said then we all hugged each other and cried.
I stood hugging Mom, Dad, and Brian for a while. My heart hurt and felt heavy. That SOB who stabbed her, he’s going to pay for this I thought. This is worth it and I am going to show the world.
“What did you say honey?” Mom asked as I realized I spoke that last bit out load.
“After last night” I said wiping my eyes free of tears “I was thinking, was this worth it. Emphatically yes it’s worth it. No son of a bitch is going to change who I am. I am a woman and I am letting the world know it!” I said loudly.
“We know you are sweetie” Dad said letting go of the hug.
We sat together in silence for the rest of the night. I wandered several times what Mr. Chambers was taking all of this, should I call him, should I call Amy and Gina, but it was too hard to pick up the phone. I just could not act. I just sat with and cried. After a while I went up to my room and lay on my bed. I little bit later Brian joined me, we talked about Brenda and how we should go see Kim and call Amy and Gina. I just could not bring myself to do it.
I was awakened by dad “Honey time to get up, you to Brian.” He said as I became conscious of sleeping next to Brian for the first time in the same bed.
“I’m up, I’m up” I said sleepily rubbing my eyes awake.
“Mom and I have decided to keep you two out of school today, the rest of your friends were already told. And if you like the six of you can spend the day together or alone. They will all be here at ten with their parents and you can decide then.” Dad said and hugged me as I was now fully awake and standing.
“Brian, you and I will get things cleaned up while Sandy gets ready.”
“Ok” Brian simply responded.
The both left and I then took a well needed shower. Once I was clean and dressed I joined the boys and mom in the kitchen where I was offered a cup of coffee. While I’ve never had it, I gave it a try and loved it immediately.
We all ate a small breakfast and talked about the impending funeral for Brenda. It was hard to talk about, between me and mom crying and Brian and Dad being stone quiet the atmosphere in the kitchen was thick.
Soon we were greeted by Amy’s parents, followed by Gina, Matt and Paul’s parents. We spent the greater part of the rest of the day just talking and then more silence and crying. It seems Mr. Chambers had decided on a funeral on Friday and we were told the rest of the school had an assembly with counselors provided. All this time I never even thought about talking to Thelma about how I was feeling at this moment.
It is so hard to deal with unexpected death and the feelings that go with it. I knew then I would call her once everyone else had left. That is exactly what I did once everyone was gone. We had decided to all meet at Amy’s house and hire the same Limo Company to take us all to the service on Friday.
I told Brian that I wanted a few minutes alone and went into my room and closed the door. I picked up my phone and dialed Thelma’s number.
“Hello, Dr. Louis speaking.” She said in her usual cheerful voice.
“It’s Sandra Davidson.” I said with sniffles.
“My dear Sandra, what’s the matter.”
“My friend Brenda, she died yesterday” I then related the whole story to her. And over the next half hour Thelma just listened to me.
“I am so sorry to hear about your friend, I know you must be hurting and thinking about yourself as well. Don’t hold your feeling in my dear, let them out.” She said in a comforting tone then continued. “You are going to have a tough time getting over this loss, but with family and friend to talk to you will eventually feel better. You must also know its ok to feel differently each day. You might even be pissed off ant the perpetrator of this, don’t worry all the feelings you are going through are normal healing process.”
“Thanks for listening Thelma, you have been a great help, and in more ways than one” I said just before finishing “and just to put you at ease, I am a woman, this experience has not changed that.” I said confidently.
The rest of the evening brought more silence between us, and then I broke it with. “We need to talk about this; Brenda was my friend, if only for a short time. I feel we need to get through this together and not in silence.
“Your right honey, I’ve just been selfish and thinking about what if it had been you in that dark parking lot.” Dad said emphatically, I don’t know what I would do without my darling daughter.
“I feel the same way as your dad does.” Mom interjected.
We sat and talked the rest of the evening and each of us talked about our feelings and how we as a family would progress.
We all then retired for the night after dad told us we could stay out of school tomorrow if we felt we needed it.
Brian and I slept in separate rooms that night; it just didn’t feel right to be together just yet.
When I woke the next morning I felt marginally better, and thought it would be good for me to go back to school. Brian agreed with me, if you can imagine two teenagers agreeing to go back to school so soon.
“What a bad choice that was” I told Brian as we walked home.
“I know what you mean, all those reporters and cameras were awful and intrusive. I can’t believe they wanted to talk to us. I’m just glad that you stood up to the one lady and told her were to stick it.”
“Yah, what a bitch she was, pushing that microphone in our faces like that. I know she didn’t know anything about us or what happened. All she wanted was our reactions for ratings, how low can you get.”
“No kidding, I’m such a lucky man to have such a smart and quick thinking girl and got us out of that mess so quickly.” Brian said.
“It’s a gift” I simply responded and smiled.
The rest of the day was a disaster as well; none of the teachers seamed in the mood to do any actual teaching, the counselor was annoyingly pushy about how everyone was feeling. ‘Ok I’ve told you a dozen times already, I am doing fine’ well almost, just leave me alone at school.
Once home we relayed what had happened at school, Dad sat down at the kitchen table smiling at me.
“Way to put the woman in her place Sandy.”
“What, you saw that?” I said surprised.
“Yep, it went out live, and you know what?” Dad responded.
“What?” I asked.
“Mr. Chambers called and said thank you.”
“For what” I asked “all I said was, why don’t you leave us alone and let us grieve.”
“For That” Dad said simply and then gave me a hug.
“Well then tell him ‘you welcome’.” I told him and smiled for the first time in two days, I think.
The rest of the week went by slowly, the mood at school improved on Wednesday as the TV crews were gone along with those counselors. The teachers were still in a funk and we learned little but it got better on Thursday. Everyone seemed to be in a better mood. As those who knew Brenda vaguely moved on to the newest hot topic in town. I wasn’t following what was going on so I have no idea what is was, and to be frank I was in no mood to care.
That afternoon in Thelma’s office was a basic repeat of our phone conversation and then she asked if I was going to speak at Brenda’s funeral tomorrow. I hadn’t even thought about it until she brought it up.
“Um, I don’t know. Am I supposed to?” I asked confused and concerned.
“All those close to the deceased will be asked to speak if they wish to. It is a good way for some to have closure for those they have lost.” Thelma explained.
“I’m not sure; I’ll have to think about it.” It that moment I thought about what would I say. “I guess I will.” I finally stated.
Thelma then ended our session with. “With all you are going through and what is to come, you must remember that family, friends and those closest to you are there for you and you them, and salvation comes from love and faith.”
“Thank you Thelma” I said as we parted ways for the session.
Friday morning came too quickly and I had no idea of what I would say if asked. I dressed in a black dress and minimal makeup. Mom came in my room just as I was brushing my hair.
“You look nice, are you about ready.” Mom asked looking at me through the mirror above my dresser; I could see mom was also in a black dress but with lace across the chest.
“Just about” I answered at I put my brush down and went with her to the car where we met up with Dad and Brian who were both wearing suits and ties, Linda joined us on the drive way coming home to be with us from college.
We all met up at Amy’s house as planned and piled into the two limos one by one. It was a tight fit but comfortable enough for us, good thing it was two stretch limos for all 18 of us.
I have to say this now that Pastor Dean is a moving but somber speaker.
“Today we lay to rest a very loving and dear child of God; her short life was brought to an abrupt end by an evil and unjustified act. While on earth Brenda had her short comings, but true friendship and love brought her to the right path. Brenda is with God now as no child can know evil. It was evil who took this lovely girl from us. I pray that God comfort her in his house and console and comfort those who loved Brenda. Now let’s bow our heads in silent prayer.” A few minutes past and he spoke again.
“The family has asked that anyone wishing to speak about Brenda may do so now.” Pastor Dean said as he handed the microphone over to Mr. Chambers.
“I would first like to thank all of Brenda’s family and friends for coming and supporting us today.” Mr. Chambers said somberly and holding back tears. “Brenda, all those sit here today will miss you and pray for you. Daddy loves you.” He said then broke down into tears and collapsed into the fetal position on the floor. Pastor Dean had to help him back to the pew.
I wasn’t sure if it would be right for me to say anything, but looking over and seeing Thelma a few pews back and her visual encouragement I then found the courage to stand up and talk about my friend.
As I approached the microphone I felt uneasy, I still had nothing to say about her, what could I say, I then just let it out.
“My dear friend did nothing to deserve this end to her life, Brenda was my friend. She had a funny way of showing it the first time I met her once I became Sandra. She was just as confused as I was, she just didn’t have the courage yet to show the world who she really was.” I paused for a second.
“Once she realized who she was, we quickly became friends and kindred spirits. She once told me a few days after letting go of her inhibitions that she could not understand why she waited so long to see the light. I simply replied, ‘because you should have hit your head on the ground instead of mine’ she looked at me shocked and shamed at the same time, but I had at that moment already forgiven her and meant it as a joke, and until the day she was attacked it was a private joke between us. I love and miss you Brenda, my friend.” I finished and cried all the way back to my pew.
Pastor Dean took back over after a few more people spoke about their friend and Pastor Dean spoke about how hate causes blindness and faith causes everything to become clear.
He concluded the service in the chapel and we all then made our way to our prospective vehicles for the funeral procession. There must have been over 100 cars in line, with the Hearse first followed by the family limo and our two close behind.
It was a somber moment when Pastor Dean laid Brenda to rest at the casket was lowered into the ground, the last time I was a witness to this was for my mother.
“Ashes to ashes, and dust to dust, by the sweat of your face you will eat bread, til you return to the ground. Because from it you were taken; for you are dust and to dust you shall return.” He said as a final prayer, and then concluded the service.
Most everyone at the service gave Mr. Chambers their respects and departed our group was last. I think I gave him the tightest hug because he groaned as I did. I tried to apologize but he had nothing to do with it as polite as he is.
We left as a group and then went our separate ways when we reached Amy’s house. We had a quite dinner at home that night and weekend.
Life moved on, Monday brought the same challenges back as well as some new ones. Brian was called as a witness the Brenda’s now classified Murder. It was hard to watch as he and others explained in detail what had happened. It turned out that Brenda had begun babysitting for this man a few weeks prior, and once he found out he had made up his mind that it was his duty to protect his six year old daughter and the world from Brenda. He made no excuses and no remorse for what he had done. Even his defence attorney turned red as he addressed the court at his sentencing hearing as he spat hate and was thankful the world was rid of Brenda.
He got life, the bastard.
We learned that his daughter was now a ward of the state; his wife had died giving birth. I felt bad for her and found Lisa had a strong connection to Brenda when we talked to family services when we asked about it. I told Brian we had to do something, but what could a couple of teenagers do with a six year old. Well we found a way. We mentored her through the rest of the school year and summer and her and I became inseparable as I began to develop. Brian took notice and we were becoming closer each day. We decided it would be best to wait and were older to go further. It was such a miracle to watch him mature into a man that year.
That June after we graduated mom and dad married. It was a great day for us all. Mom was gorgeous, and Linda made a beautiful bridesmaid. And lolly me was a cute and voluptuous ring bearer. I know I was a little old but I did not care.
The day after I turned 18 and with Thelma’s final blessing I was scheduled for surgery. I woke up two months later a complete woman and happy. Brian proposed once I was coherent enough and was giddy as a school boy. Lisa was like a daughter to us now and once I was healed enough we petitioned to have her come live we us in our new apartment.
Dawn from family services could not be happier and offered up adoption instead.
Brian and I could not be happier, we were immediately granted to be her foster parents for the time being while the adoption process was worked out.
Epilogue:
I stood at the altar staring at my soon to be husband. After all these years and all of our struggles here I was standing in my long white gown holding hands with Brian. I knew our lives together would be great if not interesting. I listened as Pastor Gene began to speak and began our ceremony.
“Today we are gathered to join in holy matrimony Brian Allen Jones and Sandra Lynn Davidson. These two come before God and the Great State of New Hampshire to join in an unbreakable union. God has answered the prayers of these two, and we are proud to have them before you all as witnesses of their undying love of one another and their daughter Lisa.” He paused and our beautiful daughter of ten joined us at the altar as ring bearer. I could not be more proud of her, as she stepped up with the pillow with our rings on top tied with a yellow ribbon. She smiled and showed her pretty white teeth and red colored lips.
Once the beautiful ceremony was over and Brian and I were dancing the first dance, I could see that Mom and Dad were dancing lovely together. They looked so happy together and so were Brian and I. Brian guided me around the dance floor and could not help but smile at all our guests. Kim was sitting alone while Gina and Paul were talking with Amy and Matt who were showing off their new born son Jason.
Our first dance was over and then Dad and I heated up the floor for the father daughter dance. He was so gentle at first but then we both got carried away and just had fun. You could not get the smile off of my face with blow torch.
THE END...
Welcome to the World of Amaria. A NON TG Science fiction novel.
Title’s for chapters:
Chapter 1: The Apprentice.
Chapter 2: Discoveries
Chapter 3: Hidden Truth
Chapter 4: The Declaration
Chapter 5: The Response
Chapter 6: Joyce’s find
Chapter 7: Amarian Explorer
Chapter 8: Jordan’s experience
Chapter 9: Earth Conference
Chapter 10: The Exchange
Alien names:
Planet Amaria, (Amarian, Amarian's plural)
ASI (Amarian Space Institute)
Manara - ASI research station
Anali — research assistant to Kuval
Kuval — station administrator senior station scientist
Ardin — associate station scientist
Linaria — apprentice/associate scientist
Dr. Binaji — Space station doctor
Celine — Computer Tech Video portion of signal
Danie — Computer Tech Video portion of signal
Fianne — Engineer Video portion of signal
Niara — Engineer Work on Audio portion of signal
Athia — Engineer Work on Audio portion of signal
Pardja — Engineer Video
Quint - Engineer assist astronomers
Emil — Support staff 1 cook, brother of Amil
Amil — Support staff 2 cook, brother of Emil
Marna — Support staff 3, housekeeping, has not been introduced yet.
Rindan — Astronomer locates origin of signal
Timit — Astronomer 2 locates origin of signal
Limie — ground control and shuttle engineer.
Sural — senior ASI commissioner
Hemis — Chancellor
Kethen - Journalist
Diaria — Camera woman
Verana — Linaria’s mother
Jindan — Shuttle craft used to transport supplies and personnel to Manara space station.
Jualdia — College that Kuval, Sural and Linaria attended.
Amarian Explorer — Space craft that goes to Earth.
Lindinberry Juice — Tree grown fruit, green and red in color, sweet and tangy.
Chinat — Fowl of Amaria, large bird of the sky
Shamist — Amarian space probe
Dr. Surmat — Anthropologist
Dr. Gilia — Linguist
Dr. Lumar — Linguist
Professor Zerela — Designer and builder of Amarian Explorer.
Earth names:
John Steve Carpenter — President
Anthony James Roberts — Vice President
Joyce Ellen Stevens — SETI head scientist
Lenny David Larson — SETI researcher
Tim Douglas Wallis — SETI researcher in Porto Rico
Mat Lin Phillips — NASA Administrator
Carl Herman Ulbrich — NASA Scientist
Henry Jack Peterson — Secretary of Homeland security.
James Allen Anderson — Secretary of State
Linda Christina Dawson — Secretary of the Air force.
Thomas Linwood Lindsay — General of the Air Force.
David Rosenberg — Colonel in charge of Nellis Air Force Base
Mike Edwards - Air Force Major in charge of security at Nellis AFB
Kuval, Manara Space Station’s administrator and senior scientist stared out his large oval window towards his home planet Amaria, a blue and green planet with cloud formations over most of the larger of the three continents. Must be raining today he thought as he reflected on his twenty years of service to ASI (Amarian Space Institute). Kuval could not believe the progress made so far in technological growth in the last few years, he was happy with the contributions that his station had made for this endeavor over the last year. Kuval then poured himself a hot cup of his favorite tea as he sat back down at his console in the center of his small office; a glass top desk with four black legs attached in a circular fashion and was surrounded by four walls, one of which had a large monitor screen on the right side of the office. His desk is adorned with a computer console a writing utensil holder, made by his son while in the first year of education. Also atop his desk were folders strung about with pictures and identifying papers of resent applicants for the apprentice program for the upcoming year. After many weeks of consideration of all the great applicants he had, he found his new junior apprentice to join his team. A Lovely short young woman with brown eyes and hazel eyes, twenty five years old and educated the ASI Technical Higher Learning Center Jualdia, with a degree in mathematics and science. He had chosen her not for her grades or degrees but on her application letter she had written. Linaria had spoken about her tough upbringing and efforts to make it through school while working at school library to earn her way through school and her dream to become a member of ASI Research Station Manara as a lofty goal to set.
Kuval sipped at his tea and then pressed the intercom button. A buzz is heard in the outer corridor. “Yes Kuval, what can I do for you?’ Anali, Kuval’s medium sized 24 year old research assistant with blond hair asked.
“Can you have Ardin report to my office please?” He asked politely.
“Yes sir, right away.” Anali put through a call to the stations associate scientist.
Kuval took another sip of his tea and set it down as his intercom buzzed. “Sir, Ardin is on his way up, he should be here in a few minutes.”
“Thanks Anali, that’ll be all for now.” Kuval waited a few minutes by sipping the last of his tea then setting the empty cup in a water basin attached to a wall. He glanced at his refection in the mirror hanging above the water basin and looked at himself. “I’m getting grey around the top; my age is catching up with me.”
“Nonsense sir, you’re still looking young and fit.” Ardin said with a chuckle as the tall 30 year old with brown hair walked into Kuval’s office. Kuval offered Ardin a seat, and as he sat Ardin asked. “I assume you have found our new apprentice for this year?”
“Yes, yes I have, and I think she will bring new ideas and talent to our staff here.” He said as he pushed a paper jacket containing Lanaria’s stats and letters in it over to Ardin. Ardin studied the material in silence for a few minutes and the set the file down. “Impressive sir, one of the top candidates, I agree; she will make a great addition to our staff.”
“Good, now that I got that done I need you to go down to Amaria and escort her up to Manara. Brief her on the way up as much as you can, then I will cover everything else when she arrives.”
“Ok sir, I will. When do you want me to head down to the planet?” Ardin asked a little excited, he always enjoyed taking a little time off on the surface for a little entertainment and distractions, he loved his work but it could be a little dull at times without new discoveries.
“Tonight and I want you back her in three days. I don’t want you to spend too much time indulging yourself. I want you back promptly.” Kuval handed Ardin another file containing a picture and name of the new apprentice.
“Yes sir, I will not let you down.” Ardin said a little disappointed at the time constraint place on him. Oh well he thought next time. As Ardin left the office, Kuval picked up the buzzed the intercom.
“Anali, can you put me through to Limie in ground control please?”
“Yes sir, just one moment please.”
Kuval spent the few minutes straitening up the mess on his desk as he waited for the communication to go through. Just as he finished putting away the files in storage the intercom buzzed once again so he could call Limie at ground control because the Jindan Manara’s only shuttle was on the planet for minor repairs and upgrades.
“Sir, I have Limie for you, Go ahead.” A clear deep voice could be heard over the intercom. “Limie here, what can I do for you Kuval?”
“I am good thank you; I have a new apprentice coming to the station in three days. Can you send the shuttle Jindan up to the station at once? Ardin will ride it down and pick up a student named Linaria. Please schedule them a return trip in three days please.” Kuval explained to Limie.
“I’m good, let me check the maintenance record and see if it’s ready to go.” Kuval could hear the tell tale signs of Limie checking the computer terminal at his end. “Yes, it’s ready to go. I will get you a pilot immediately and send it up within the next few hours.” Limie said with assurance.
“That’s great, thank you.” Kuval said with appreciation for the quick turnaround of the Jindan’s maintenance.
“Any time sir, have a good day.”
“You have a good day to good bye.” Kuval then ended the call by pressing a button on the communications panel then asked his assistant to make an additional call. “Anali can you put me through to the ASI commissioner’s office please.” He once again asked politely of his assistant.
“Just one moment sir.” Anali responded.
While waiting for the call to go through he used his computer terminal and reviewed the latest telescope radio recordings, pausing on a few and marked them for future scrutiny. Not too long after finishing his intercom buzzed.
“Sir, I have Commissioner Sural for you, go ahead sir.” Anali said as she transferred the call to Kuval’s office.
Kuval was happy to speak to his long time friend. “Sural my old friend, how are you this fine day?”
“I am doing fine Kuval, and you?”
“Great day here in orbit, I called to let you know that I have chosen this year’s apprentice, her name is Linaria and is from your own school, Jualdia.” Kuval said to his friend, happy with his decision.
“Yes, I know her, she is an outstanding student and will make a valuable researcher and assistant, I will inform her immediately” He said proudly knowing that other schools had just as good or even better candidates. “I am positive she will be ecstatic, when should I tell her to be ready to go?”
“In three days, Ardin will meet Linaria at the school and bring her to Manara the following day, please tell her of the departure day.” Kuval instructed Sural to convey the itinerary to Linaria.
“Ok, I will let her know the great news, can you send me the travel arrangements.”
“Yes, of course I am sending the information now.” Kuval punched a few buttons on his terminal and transmitted the information to Sural.
“Got it my friend, have you found anything interesting this week?”
“Just a few radio signals that I think will be a good first try with Linaria and her skills, but nothing exciting yet.”
“All right then, you have a good day, I will speak with you again soon.” Sural said to his friend.
“Ok, Bye my friend.” As Kuval ended the call he went back to his terminal logging radio transmissions for further interpretation.
Sural got up from his desk in the middle of a lavish office surrounded by book shelves, animal skin covered chairs, a red and yellow floor covering with window looking out on the campus of the school. He walked out the front door to the green of the courtyard he strolled to another building with the same red and blue colors three stories high. He made his way to the front door of student housing and walked down the left hallway of the first floor and knocked on the third door of the room on the right. A lovely young lady of twenty five opened the door. “Hello commissioner, what can I do for you today?” Surprised by the visit by the commissioner and gestured for Sural to come in.
“I am here to give you some wonderful news to tell you.” Noticing her expression changed from questioning to total excitement.
“Good news, what news is that?” She said with continued excitement and anticipation noticeable by here constant fidgeting knowing that she had applied for an apprenticeship on the Manara space station.
“As I am sure you are aware that the ASI station Manara was in the process of choosing this year’s apprentice. Well, get a hold of yourself, you are the one they have chosen, congratulations.” As Sural gave Linaria a quick smile and handed her the document with her travel itinerary.
“Oh wow, Kuval choose me. I can’t believe it. I am ecstatic!” Linaria was clearly excited. “When do I leave for Manara Space Station?”
“The day after tomorrow, go ahead and pack your things and go to the transport station and a scientist from the station named Ardin will meet you and take you up to Manara.”
“Ok thank you, I am so grateful for this opportunity I will pack up tomorrow and I will make you proud of me.”
“Of that I have no doubt.” Sural said with glee. “I am already very proud of you just for being selected.”
“Thanks again Sural, have a good day.”
“I will, you do the same.” As Sural turned and walked down the corridor.
Linaria slung herself on a chair and cheered to whole world. Her excitement could defiantly be felt. She sat and began to comprehend her future. She then took stock in the belongings she should take to the station. She then got up from the chair and almost floated towards her closet, opening the door and grabbed from the top shelf a bag in which to pack her belongings. She then thought to that she defiantly had too many things to bring with her. She thought, ‘I am going to have to box up some of my things and put them in storage for a while.’ Then she laid her bag on the chair and left her room in order to contact her mother and give her the great news. Linaria punched a few buttons and made a call to her mother Verana who was also a graduate of Jualdia school of music and was well known for the music she had composed.
“Hello.” A musical voice answered the communication.
“Mom, it’s me, I have some great news.” Linaria said excitedly she could hardly contain herself. “I’ve been selected as this year’s ASI Space Station Manara new apprentice. Can you believe it?”
“Lin my dear really, that’s wonderful. I am so happy for you Linaria; this is a wonderful opportunity for you. Congratulations you deserve it.” Verana said with glee and pride.
“Thanks mom, I know I will do my best and make you proud.” Linaria said with assurance.
“When do you leave for the station?” Her mom asked.
“The day after tomorrow, I am to meet a male named Ardin and he is to take up to the station and brief me on what is to be expected.” She told her mom.
“Well call me when you get there, and keep in touch with me ok.”
“I will mom, I’ll talk to you soon, bye.”
“I’ll look forward your first call, bye.”
As the call ended Linaria walked back into her room and lay on her bed contemplating her future. She then fell quickly asleep and dreamt of the trip ahead of her.
Linaria woke up early the next day. She had slept very well and was still excited about her selection. She then began grabbing her things and began to pack them into suitcases for her trip tomorrow. Linaria spent the rest of the day packing and organizing her things. Later that evening she decided to go and see her friends for some last minute fun.
Ardin found himself once again in the space port on Amaria, it had been almost two months since the last time he had step foot on his home planet. He walked out into the bright sunlight and into the square just outside of ASI’s transportation center. A large rectangular building with two floors and a tower with window’s all around in the center of the square. He briefly looked around and took a deep breath. He was certainly glad to be back, even for a short time. He then walked across the square to the community transport station and boarded a transport that was heading towards the school where he is to pick up Linaria. Ardin sat in a seat towards the front of the transport, a four wheeled vehicle shaped in a cylindrical cigar shape with large windows and 30 seats for passengers. It pulled away from the stop and Ardin put his head back and closed his eyes for the rest of the trip to Jualdia. Ardin woke up just as the transport stopped and he heard over the intercom. “Last stop Jualdia station.” He then got off of the transport and walked up the steps to the administration building. As he approached the center desk in the rotunda he saw a young woman sitting at the desk, he smiled at her and asked. “I am here to meet Linaria, I am from Manara Space Station, I’m Ardin, and can you get a hold of her and let her know that I am here to pick her up.”
“Yes of course, right away sir.” The young receptionist said. “You can wait over at those tables for her to arrive.” She indicated with her hand pointing to tables along the wall. She then went to her terminal and began to type.
Ardin then turned to walk away and then sat at an open spot at one of the tables, picked up a pamphlet and read it as he waited. After just a few minutes he recognized Linaria walk up to the center desk probably asking the young receptionist where he was sitting. Ardin then stood up and walked over to where Linaria was standing and offered his hand in hello. Linaria turned around and saw Ardin walk up to her, she then knew this must be her escort to the station. She smiled brightly as she shook his hand. “Hello, I’m Linaria; you must be Ardin from the station.”
“Yes, I am. I am pleased to meet you. I am here to make sure you get up to the station safely and I will brief you on the way up.”
“Oh great, nice to meet you to, I am totally excited about going to the station.” She said with glee.
“We are scheduled to leave for Manara in two hours; I hope you are ready to go.” Ardin asked.
“I am defiantly ready to go; I just have to grab my things and go.”
“That’s good, I will help you with your bags and then we will take the transport to ASI transportation station, have you ever been in space?”
“No, this will be my first time. I am really looking forward to it.”
“Well let’s do this then.” Ardin said with a smile.
Ardin followed Linaria out of the administration building towards student housing. Linaria opened the door to her room for what could be for the last time. On the floor just inside were three bags all packed and ready to be taken. Ardin walked into Linaria’s room and picked up two of the bags and Linaria picked up the last one.
“Is there anything else?” Ardin asked as he prepared to walk out with the heaviest of the three bags.
“Nope, this is all, let’s get going.” Linaria said as she walked out of her room and looked the door as she closed it.
Ardin lead the way across the school campus to the transport station. They waited a few minutes for the transport to show up. Once the transport arrived Ardin and Linaria boarded the transport to ASI transport station and sat in the middle. A few more students boarded the transport, the doors closed and the transport departed. Ardin asked Linaria if she had any expectations. “Linaria, what do you think of being selected for this assignment?”
“I feel ecstatic, and I know that this experience will be a great one, and that I will do my best to contribute to the mission.” Linaria said with a little pride.
“That’s what I was hoping you would say, Kuval had to pick just one person out of hundreds for this opportunity and he took a while to pick just the right candidate. After he told me I was coming to the planet to bring you up I read your record and knew he had chosen the right person.” Ardin said with true admiration for Kuval’s selection.
“Why thank you Ardin, I appreciate that.” Linaria said
After only a few minutes the transport arrived at the space port and Ardin and Linaria got off and walked towards the front doors. Linaria was taking it all in, turning her head side to side admiring all the Amarian Transport station and space port had to offer. Several green white and blue flags were flying overhead with the light breeze, the sun was just about half way across the sky as Linaria looked towards the deep blue and pondered what was to come. Ardin once again picked up a bag and walked into the front doors, holding the double glass doors open for his new colleague. As Linaria walked into the space port, she could clearly see the space transport on the landing pad and was surprised by its size.
The ship had a clean design to it, grey with green and white emblem of Amaria on the front and side with a triangular shaped nose with a large rectangular body and a door on the left side and a hatch on the rear, with emergency escape stenciled above it. Ardin could tell that she was intrigued and told her the name of the craft that would be taking them both up to Manara.
“That’s the Jindan; she’s going to be taking you to your new home for the next year.” Ardin explained.
“I can’t wait, can we board her?” Linaria asked excitedly.
“Of course, we will just put your things in the back and climb on in.” Ardin said as he guided Linaria into the shuttle craft for the first time.
Inside were to pilot seats in the front, a storage area off to the right side in the back with supplies stenciled with Manara Space Station. Ardin and Linaria set her bags next to a big grey box in the storage area. Ardin then gestured towards the seat on the left side of the pilot’s station and he took the seat on the right. Ardin could not help but see the confused look on Linaria’s face, sensing she had a question on her mind Ardin explained.
“Well we will just call this your first lesson in piloting the Jindan, you have to learn sometime. So sit back and listen and I am sure you will pick it up very quickly.” Ardin waited a few seconds for the realization of piloting the Jindan for the first time to sink in. “First of all we need to do a preflight of all in flight systems. In the right side of your seat there is a pocket an inside you will find the check list required.”
Linaria reached into the pocket with her right hand and pulled out a red rectangular tablet computer with a buttons on the bottom and right hand side. She placed it on the console in front of her and looked over at Ardin. “Ok, now push the lower left button marked with the square symbol and it will turn on the pad. In case of a failure of the pad there’s a copy of written instructions in a pouch under your seat.” Ardin instructed.
Linaria pressed the button marked with the triangle with her right thumb, as the computer pad powered up she could see the check list appear and it had ‘Welcome to the Jindan, press the enter key to continue’.
“The enter key is on the right hand side marked by a star on the button.” Ardin explained.
Linaria pressed the star on the pad and the check list loaded and listed all the procedures to get started. “There’s a lot here.” Linaria said with a little apprehension.
“Don’t worry; it becomes much easier as you get practice. You will get twice a week lessons until you are ready to pass the final check ride.” He said to calm her fears.
Linaria looked at the first set of instruction and began slowly inputting commands and pressing buttons on the front and left side console. The Jindan came alive as systems were powered up. Finally as Linaria finished the first set of instructions the last step was for the cabin door to close. As she pressed the switch for the door to closed she heard a soft whoosh as the door closed and the cabin pressurized.
“Ok, Linaria now that the preflight is complete are you ready?”
“Yes I am.” She answered with excitement.
Ardin began with. “All we need now is departure clearance and we can go.” Ardin was writing on a pad of paper and handed to Linaria.
“What’s this?” She asked.
“It’s our call sign and departure clearance instructions to ask departure control.
“Ok thanks. Departure control this is Jindan one zero six, request departure clearance to Manara Space station.” Linaria said perfectly and with confidence.
“That was very good Linaria.” Ardin said pleased with her performance.
“Thank you.” Linaria responded and departure control came through seconds later with the clearance for them to leave.
“Jindan one zero six, this is departure control, you have clearance to depart with an initial heading of one eight zero then climb to one zero thousand feet and then enter normal orbital approach.”
Ardin interjected immediately. “Repeat what they said with the clearance so they know you understood.”
“Yes sir.” Linaria took a deep breath and repeated departure controls instructions. “Departure control Jindan one zero six departing for Manara Space Station on an initial heading of one eight zero then climb to one zero thousand feet and then entering normal orbital insertion.” “
That was great Linaria, now let’s go.” Ardin said and pointed to power and pitch controls. “Now select full power and a 15 degree pitch on the pitch control.”
“Will do, by the way you can call me Lin for short.” Lin said as she adjusted the power and pitch controls. The Jindan then rose with grace and ease into the air, turning as it lifted above the space port. Off into the blue sky, higher and faster as it gained altitude.
“This is easier than I would have thought Ardin. Thanks for letting me pilot us to the station.” Lin said with glee and appreciation. “
You’re welcome; now once we reach 100,000 feet input the following into the navigation computer.” Ardin handed Linaria another piece of paper he had written on. Lin looked at the papers instructions and nodded her ok. Once the shuttle craft reached 100,000 feet a beeping sound could be heard in the cock pit. Lin entered the data the Ardin had given her and once she hit the accept button the Jindan accelerated at a great rate and turned full nose up towards space. A few seconds later the sky faded to black and the star could now be clearly seen. Off to Linaria’s right the moon of Amaria could be seen a reddish brown orb that lumbered in orbit of her home planet.
“Wow, would you look at that. This is great, it’s so…beautiful. I can’t believe the view.” Lin exclaimed with pleasure and wonderment of a child.
“Yes it is, now take a look overt to your right.” Ardin gestured towards the Amarian Space Station Manara. “Oh my, that’s…that’s amazing. I did not realize that it was that big.” Lin was exasperated with her new home for the next year.
As the Jindan continued turning the whole station came into view. A circular inter ring that has a dish antennae at the top pointing toward deep space. The center ring has four sections coming out in a spoke pattern at 45 degree intervals that are about half the size of the inner ring. The surfaces are white and dark grey in color. Each section has viewing ports on either side and they are spaced evenly and have an oval shape to them. The spoke closest to them was different from the others; it clearly had a docking port at one end obviously to accept the Jindan. As Lin took in all of this new experience she felt a rush of excitement and an almost childish glee as the Jindan approached the station.
“The station is amazing Ardin, what’s it like inside?” Lin asked.
“It’s like any research station on Amaria, work stations, offices and laboratories in each section. The center is the main section and houses all the computers and radio telescope receivers and is where we will be working.” The Jindan took a sharp right turn towards the spoke with docking port one painted on the side closest to the edge of the port. On the port door was written ‘Caution, do not open inner door prior to pressure equalization.’
Suddenly the Jindan came to a complete stop just a few feet from the port. Ardin explained the next task. “Ok Lin, now we need to get clearance to dock and use the thrusters here.” Ardin pointed to the thruster controls. “Just use one or two bursts on the right side to ease us over then when you here the proximity alarm hit this button here.” Ardin pointed to a button marked coupling lock engage/disengage. “I’ll request clearance for you while you study the thruster controls.” Ardin then pressed the communications button and requested clearance to dock. “Manara Space station this is Jindan one zero six requesting clearance to dock at strut one with two person and cargo on board.” Ardin completed the request and waited for clearance to come in.
Kuval’s voice came through the com and gave clearance. “Jindan one zero six, this is Manara, clearance granted and welcome home.”
“Alright, now like I said just one push on the thruster control, no more than one at a time, just to nudge us softly to the dock port and the engage the locking clamps.”
Linaria took a deep breath then reached over and pressed for right thrust. A small hissing sound could be heard as the Jindan slowly eased to the left and in a few seconds the proximity alarm sounded. Linaria had her finger lingering over the engage button and pressed it once. A loud clunk was heard and the Jindan was safely docked to Manara. Ardin looked over at Lin and said. “Now press the pressure equalization button above your head on the left and when it turns greet from red you may open the door.”
Lin pressed the button, a whoosh; the same as before on takeoff was heard once again. The indicator light flashed red three times then changed to green indicating a good seal and the pressure in the Jindan was the same as inside the station. Lin then pressed another button and the door on the left slid open with ease and at the same time the door to the strut opened and a white light illuminated the entrance to the station. As Linaria stood up and walked towards the back she noticed an older gentleman standing in the corridor, he was tall with grey hear and green eyes. “He sure looks distinguished.” She thought to herself. Linaria smiled at the new man as he entered the Jindan.
“Welcome aboard the Manara Space Station my dear, Welcome.” Kuval extended his hand in friendship towards Linaria. “How was your trip Linaria? By the way I am Kuval, Senior Scientist and Administrator her at Manara.”
“I am very pleased to meet you sir.” Linaria grasped is hand and shook it in greeting. “Thank you for this opportunity to be an apprentice here. I know I will do my best and try not to mess up.”
“Don’t worry about it Linaria, we are all known to make a few mistakes from time to time, just as long as we learn from them and not make the same ones twice, don’t you agree Ardin?”
“Yes sir, absolutely.” Ardin answered remembering his first big mistake and not backing up the nightly radio telescope recordings. Luckily he had recognized his mistake and corrected it on his own the next day. “Lin I know I have made a few myself.
“Well that makes me feel a little better. Thanks for your encouragement and acceptance.” Lin responded to their statements of not being perfect. She honestly felt better.
“Lin?” Kuval questioned both in general.
“Yes sir, I like to be called Lin for short. It’s what my mom has always called me since I was little.”
“Ok and you may call me Kuval, short for Kuval he snickered at his own joke.
“Well I guess a tour of the station is in order, I will have some of the maintenance personnel collect the cargo and put your bags in your living space.” Kuval directed her down the corridor toward the center of the station.
Lin was taking all of it in with excitement and glee of a child again. “I can’t believe this place, it’s wonderful, and how many people are working on the station Kuval?
“In total 17, three radio telescope scientists, including you, two computer engineers, five maintenance personnel, three support personnel who cook and clean, a doctor and two astronomers…..oh and my very special assistant Anali, she’s your age so you just might like her.”
Kuval lead Linaria into the center of the station turning towards the right, Ardin went to the left. “Sir I will me you and Lin in the computer center when you are done with her tour.”
“No problem, see you in a few.” Kuval answered back. “He’s probably going to raid the kitchen.” Kuval again laughed at his own joke.
“Thanks for the lesson.” Linaria told Ardin as he proceeded down the center corridor.
“You’re welcome.” Ardin said as he disappeared around the next corner.
“I knew he could not resist giving you a lesson in piloting the Jindan. So, how was it for you?”
“It was fun and easy too. Only hard part was the docking. I was worried at fist but got through it.” Lin answered Kuval.
Kuval continued showing Lin around the station, stopping at each cubicle and explaining its function. He showed her the communications center, astronomical center, medical bay, living quarters and engineers cubical. When they stopped at the dining hall there was Ardin sitting at one of the three tables eating away.
“Hi you two, enjoy the tour so far Lin?” Ardin wiped sauce from his chin that had dropped onto his chin.
“Let’s leave those two alone, they need their privacy.” Kuval laughed loudly obviously referring the huge sandwich that has all the fixings dripping out of it.
“You’re so comical Kuval, very funny.” Ardin even laughed at the joke this time.
Kuval then lead Lin to the grand finale, the computer and radio telescope center. A large door opened as they approached, a young woman with blond hair and about the same height as Linaria came through the door almost bumping into Kuval. “Whops, sorry Kuval, Oh hi you must be the new apprentice Linaria right.” Anali said she would have shook Linaria’s hand but had a handful of file folders and looked to be in a rush. “Nice to meet you Linaria, I will chat with you later I’ve some filing to do at the moment.”
“It’s no problem Anali nice to meet you to, call me Lin.” Lin shouted as Anali darted down the corridor.
“She’s a great assistant; I never have to get on her case on anything.” Kuval said with admiration. “She’s your room mate as well; I almost forgot to tell you.”
“That good, I was afraid I would be lonely up here, but now I’ll have someone to talk to.”
“Shall we go in?” Kuval gestured towards the still open door to the computer center.
Kuval lead the way and inside. Lin was astounded at the sight before her, computer consoles along the right side of the room, radio receivers on the left, and three work centers in the center all with access to the mainframe. Kuval took her on a tour of the space and explained each consoles purpose. Then he led her to the door at the end and stated. “And this is my office, and that desk with the big pot on it is Anali’s desk. Kuval continued and ended up at a desk with only a keyboard and monitor on it. “This will be your work space here.” Kuval said as he tapped on the metal surface of the desk. “You may do with it as you please. Just keep it clean.
Lin pulled out the chair that was under the desk turn it and sat at her desk. “It’s nice sir. I brought some pictures I can put on it, thanks.”
“Ardin’s desk is across from yours.” Kuval pointed to the desk with about ten folders strewn about the surface in a haphazard fashion. “He never cleans his desk; he’s usually down in the radio center adjusting frequencies. Well that’s the end of the tour; you may go to your quarters I showed you earlier and unpack your things. Dinner will be in two hours, I’ll see you then.”
“Thank you for the tour Kuval, I enjoyed it immensely.” Lin said honestly, and then she looked around the center of the room once again to take it all in. She then walked over to the door and walked down the corridor towards the living quarters. As Lin entered her new living space she saw that her bags had been placed on an empty bed on the left side of the room. She then walked over to the oval window looking off into space and then once again she got a look at Amaria. “Beautiful.” Lin muttered to herself reflecting on her new surroundings.
“Yes it certainly is beautiful.” Responded Anali as she entered the room they now were sharing, Anali also saw that Lin was startled as she spoke. “I’m sorry Lin; I did not mean to scare you.”
“It’s alright Anali; I was just enjoying the view when you came in. Don’t worry, I am ok.” Lin said as she smiled at her new roommate.
“Good, so what do you think of all of this?” Anali asked as she gestured around towards the rest of the station.
“It’s a lot to take in at first glance, but I think I will get used to all of what goes on here.”
“I’m sure you will Kuval was scouring the applicants for this position a great deal over the last month. I think his choice is a good one. Anali said in a friendly manner.
“Well thank you for being so kind so far, I am sure you and I will be great friends in no time.” Lin said with assurance and hope that they would truly become good friends. “How long have you been on the station?” Lin asked her new companion.
“Since the beginning, Kuval brought me with him after the station was brought online a year ago; I’ve been working for him since I left school. This is by far the best job I have had.” Anali said with pride and accomplishment in her voice.
“That’s great Anali, I just hope that I do well and contribute to our planets future in one way or another. I can’t wait to meet the rest of the crew. I’ve only seen a few of them while on tour with Kuval, they were all too busy to chat, but I am sure I will get to know them all shortly.”
“Oh you will meet all of them for sure, when Kuval said you were to meet him in the dining hall later, that’s for all of us to get together each night and discus our progress and anything else that comes up we need to talk about.” Anali explained their weekly get together's.
“Oh really; he left that part out, well now I am really looking forward to dinner now.” Lin said as she unzipped her back and began putting away her clothes in a reddish brown chest of drawers that was inset into the wall of her side of the grey and white room.
“Well I am sure you will enjoy it. Here let me help you put your things away.” Anali offered and then helped Lin put her things away. After about 30 min they had finished putting away everything and straitened up the room. “Well Lin I think we should go ahead and get ourselves to the dining hall.”
“Ok, just lead the way.” Lin said pointing down the right corridor with her hand.
“Just follow me milady.” Anali said as she chuckled.
Anali and Lin walked casually down the corridor and entered the large dining hall. Both of the tables had been pushed together into on long table, in a conference style. Once they entered they noticed that Ardin was already seated on the left of the head of the table in the first seat. Lin smiled at Ardin for a brief moment of recognition. Ardin then pointed over to the right side just across from him indicating were Linaria would sit this evening.
“Sit right over their Lin, would you like anything to drink while we wait for the others?”
Linaria made her way over to that side of the table Ardin had indicated, she took her seat and Anali sat right next to her. “Um… yes please, I’ll have Lindinberry juice.”
“I’ll have Amarian ale and one Lindinberry juice for Lin.” Ardin asked Emil the cook behind the counter.
“Sure Ardin, just one minute.” Emil said then turned to pour the drinks that Ardin has asked for. After pouring the drinks Emil came out of the kitchen and handed the drinks to Ardin and Lin. “Hello my dear, you must be the new apprentice.” Emil asked with a smile.
“Yes, I am Linaria but you may call me Lin for short.” Lin said as she stood and offered to shake Emil’s hand in greeting. Emil took her hand and shook it in welcome as the both smiled. “Welcome Lin, welcome to Manara and I hope you like what I have cooked for dinner tonight, roasted chinat.”
“I am pleased to meet you.” Lin answered, chinat is her favorite fowl. “Chinat that sounds good, I’m sure I will enjoy it.”
Lin sat back down still smiling and took a sip from her cup. At the same time Kuval followed be everyone else came into the dining hall. All of them took seats at the tables that had been put together. As they sat Emil came out and took the last seat open on the right side. Everyone at the table was talking to each other and the volume was loud.
Ding, ding, ding, ding, could be heard as Kuval stood up at the head of the table and hit the side of his glass with his spoon and spoke. “Can I have your attention please?” Everyone quitted down. “I would like to introduce to you Linaria, she is from Jualdia. She is also our very first apprentice scientist here on Manara.” Kuval pointed to Linaria and she stood up and greeted everyone with a nod. Kuval then began introducing all members of the team; he started with the doctor who was sitting to the left of Anali. “Starting on your left next to Anali is our station doctor Binaji, Across from him is our two computer engineers Celine ad Danie, then there’s Fianne who is sitting next to Danie.” Each person stood and gave a welcoming not as they were introduced. “Next to the doctor is Niara one of our station engineers, the other four are Fianne, Athia, Pardja, and head engineer Quint. Next to Quint is Amil and Emil, there brothers and our cooks and next to Pardja is Marna, he’s housekeeping. Next to him are Timit and our station astronomers. And that’s everyone.” Kuval then sat back down as all those in attendance greeted Linaria.
“Thank you all for that great welcome, you are all very kind. Please call me Lin.” Lin told them all as she shook everyone’s hand and finally sat down.
Amil and Emil both stood up at the same time and Emil spoke. “We will be right back with our dinner, roasted Chinat.” Amil and Emil went into the kitchen ad they both grabbed plates of food and put them in front of everyone. Each person politely waited for everyone to be served. Everyone chatted throughout the meal; they talked about all that Lin should expect while on the station and what they all did on a daily basis. When everyone had finished eating Amil stood up and said. “If everyone is finished please place your dishes into the wash bin in the kitchen, Emil and I will clean in here and put the tables back. Lin was the second to get up just after Kuval gathered his dishes and headed for the kitchen. Lin followed suit and placed her dished in the wash basin then left. Kuval and the rest left the dining hall for their living quarters. Kuval then said good night to Lin. “Lin I will see you in the morning, have a good night.”
“Thank you Kuval, I will.” Lin said as she walked back to her room, as she entered her room she went to the bathroom and cleaned up and then got ready for bed. She then sat at the desk were the communications panel in their room was. She pressed a few buttons and a call went through. “Hello mother, how are you?”
“I am fine Lin baby, how was your trip? Verana asked her daughter.
“It was fun, I got to pilot the Jindan up to the station. And I did well at it too. I also met everyone that works here at a big dinner get together we had tonight. Everyone is really nice.”
“That’s great dear, how’s your room?”
“Its fine, I have a girl named Anali as a roommate. She’s very nice and friendly.”
“Good, what else did you do today?”
“Well my boss Kuval had a coworker Ardin, he’s nice too by the way, teach me how to use the telescope and computers.”
“He's nice huh?” Verana questioned her daughter.
“Yes, nice, don’t worry I’ll be careful. I just wanted to tell you that I was ok and got here ok. I’ll call you once a week.” Lin told her mother.
“That sounds fine honey, you do well and I am proud of you. Have a good night.” Her mom said with excitement.
“Thank you mom, good night.” Lin ended the call then went off to bed as she was tired from this first exciting day and fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
This is a NON TG element Science Fiction Fantasy. Follow the Amarian's as they discover radio and television signals from earth. Linaria continues to work on the radio signal discovery. Please comment on characters and flow.
“Very well, thank you and good morning to you too. You ready for your first official day of work?”
“Absolutely, I am so excited about this day.” Lin responded as she finished getting dressed for the day. She wore a grey and green jumpsuit that all the team members had been wearing the previous day. Kuval had given her three sets the day before.
Anali began getting herself ready for her day. “If you hang back for a few minutes I’ll go to breakfast with you.”
As Lin started for the door she stopped turned around and said. “Yah, ok that sounds nice.” She then walked over to the big window and once again looked off into deep space. “I think it’s more beautiful today than it was yesterday.”
“I was the same way when I first got here last year, but I have to admit, it never does get old.” Anali said as she joined Lin at the window after finishing getting dressed. She looked out the window for a few more minutes with Lin and asked. “Well I’m ready to go, shall we go eat.”
“Yes, I like the way these jump suits fit and look. They’re very form fitting.”
“You’ll learn to have a love hate relationship with them. The men like the way the fit us as well. If you know what I mean.” Anali explained the minor distractions she had caused wearing the thing.
Lin and Anali walked out the door of their room to the dining hall. As they entered there sitting at the table were Ardin and Kuval. They both had plates full of fruits and cereals in front of them. Anali and Lin grabbed trays and plated and filled up with what they wanted and sat across from Ardin and Kuval. As they sat Kuval greeted them. “Good morning ladies, how are you getting along today?”
“Fine thank you, Anali had been a helpful and a real dear since meeting yesterday.” Lin said with appreciation.
“That’s nice to say Lin, thank you. You’re nice too.” Anali said while lightly blushing.
“Well I am glad you two are getting along.” Kuval said and then turned and looked over at Ardin. “After breakfast will you take Lin to the computer center and get her fixed up and then both you two come to my office for a briefing.”
Ardin smiled and asked. “The usual computer access levels then.”
“Yes of course, and show her how to save and mark signals that will need further study as well. That should take you about an hour; let’s say we meet in my office in an hour and a half.”
“Ok sir, I take care of it.” Ardin then looked over at Lin and said. “Whenever you’re ready I’ll take you to get all of that done.
“Thanks Ardin, I’ll be finished in a few minutes.” Lin said and saw that Anali had given her a big smile and nod towards Ardin. She must think he likes me Lin thought to herself. Lin sat quietly as she finished her breakfast then she got up and Anali and Ardin followed suit. They all put their dishes away and left the dining hall for the central hub of the computer center. Once they entered Anali took her a seat at her desk and logged into her computer. Ardin motioned to Lin to sit at the computer at her desk. She sat down and waited for instructions. “So what do I do now Ardin?” Lin asked as she looked at the monitor screen sitting of the left side of her new desk.
“Well first of all we need to get you access to the system.” Ardin explained as he took the keyboard and typed his login information. Once the system had logged him on he then set up an account for Lin, as he did so she watched everything he did. Ardin then pushed the keyboard over to Lin. “Ok now just enter a password and you’ll be all set up. If you need anything printed out, the printer is right over there.” Ardin pointed to a printer on the left of the room. Once Lin entered her password Ardin instructed her on how to save files and flag them for further study. Lin practiced with a few of the newest radio recordings and when she finished the last one in the quiche Ardin showed her how to log off of the system. “Very good, you got the hang of that quickly. Well now that that is done well head on over to Kuval’s office for his brief.” Lin then stood up as the computer logged off and walked with Ardin into her new boss’s office for the second time.
As they approached Ardin smiled at Anali and told her. “We are here to see Kuval for Lin’s brief.”
“Go right in, he’s waiting for you.” Anali responded as she pointed towards the office as to direct them inside.
“Thank you Anali.” Lin said with a friendly tone. “Let’s have lunch together later and have a chat.”
“Ok Lin, I will meet you there.”
Lin and Ardin entered Kuval’s office, as they did Kuval stood up and gestured to two chairs that were placed in front of a large wide screen monitor hanging on the right side of Kuval’s office. They both sat in a chair and Kuval pressed a button on a remote that he had pulled out of his top left hand drawer. “Ok Lin, Ardin, here is the latest radio telescope intercepts. I have flagged the first three myself, the next two are from Ardin and the last one is one you flagged just a few minutes ago. I know you flagged two more but this one is the most interesting and we will look at it first.” A list of six radio signals with date and time stamps in them were listed on the monitor. Each file name had the operator’s name, time of signal, length of signal and sequence number. Kuval then pointed at the screen and the first radio signal was highlighted, and then scrolled to the bottom of the list, indicating it in bold which selected the file name of ‘lin1040_045.rt1’. Then a large graph appeared on the screen with variations of signal strength, quality, frequency and duration of recording. Kuval asked Lin if she could explain what was displayed. “Lin, why flag this one in particular, can you explain what we see here? Go ahead when you’re ready.”
Lin took a deep breath and began. “Well sir, as you can see by the strength and duration of the wave form and the duration of the signal it appears to be radiation surge in a fluctuating frequency it is indicating a possible discovery of a rotating star.” Lin finished with assurance that she was correct. Kuval an Ardin looked at each other briefly and then over at Lin.
“That is correct Lin, very nice catch. Since the point of origin is not known you get the privilege of naming this new pulsar Lin. That’s great for you, congratulations.” Kuval said with admiration.
“Thank you, I would like to name it Verana Sol, after my mom.” Lin stated with a smile and glee.
“Ok, I will take the necessary steps in naming this pulsar as ‘Verana Sol’ and log it in.” Kuval said with a smirk.
“Can you show me how that works?” Lin asked.
Kuval motioned for Lin to come over to his desk. “Here sit at my console and I will show you how it’s done.”
Lin sat at Kuval’s desk and waited for instruction. “Ok, now what do I do?”
Kuval instructed Lin on how to prepare the documents for naming a newly discovered celestial object. He also showed her how to schedule visual telescope time so that she could take a look at the pulsar itself. The astronomers would download the images onto the server for review later so each person could share and contribute to all the discoveries on Manara. After Lin finished she stood up and thanked Kuval. “There you go Lin, now you know how to do the request. It should only take a few days for ASI to process it. You will get a confirmation when it clears. Now that that is finished you may go to your desk, Ardin will you show her how to position the radio telescope and record a few local signals for a live demonstration?”
“Ok, no problem.” Ardin said and led Lin to her desk.
Lin took a seat at her desk and Ardin began showing her how to program the radio telescope to change position. Lin realized this was a little more time consuming than just looking at the recordings that Ardin showed her earlier. Ardin had showed her the outer most gas giant planet in their solar system. She was glad for the experience. Lin had learned of it properties in school, but this was different. It was great to see the data come in live and made it more real. ‘Thanks Ardin, this is great.”
“You’re welcome Lin; now if you have any questions just go ahead ask ok. Go ahead and try it out for yourself for the next couple of hours and see what you can find.”
“Ok, thanks again Ardin.” Ardin then took a seat at his own desk and logged in. He began reviewing more of the latest recordings as he had to catch up for the time he was away on Amaria. “I think she will do fine.” He thought to himself and began working.
Lin spent the next several hours looking for and studying signals from the telescope. She was truly enjoying herself. She just hoped that the novelty would not were off and become boring after a while. Lin was engrossed in a signal that she had just found and was startled out of her chair when someone tapped on her shoulder.
“Oh I sorry Lin, I didn’t mean to scare you. I just thought you might go and have lunch.” Anali said with a smile.
“It’s ok, I guess I was occupied by this signal and did not realize you had walked up behind me. Lunch sounds great, let’s go.” With that said Lin and Anali walked out of the room towards the dining hall for some needed food. As Lin and Anali entered Amil greeted them.
“Hello again Lin, how’s your first day going, and how are you Anali?” Amil said with a grin.
“I am doing fine, thanks.” Anali said and looked over to Lin.
“I’m having a great first day, I’ve learned so much already but I have a long ways to go to learn everything.” Lin responded with a great big smile.
“That’s great Lin, we are all glad you are getting along so well so far. Enjoy your lunch you two.” Amil said as he went to the kitchen to serve the two young ladies.
As Amil came out with their plates Rindan and Timit joined them at the table. Amil saw them and greeted them as well. “Good after noon gentlemen, I be right back with your lunch.”
“We are doing fine Amil, where’s Emil?” Timit asked as he and Rindan took their seats.
“He’s over in spire number one; he’s helping Pardja repair damage to the airlock.” He gave a stern look over at Lin. “I guess Linaria did not slow down enough and now it’s not sealing right.”
Everyone could tell that Lin had a terrified and worried look on her face. “Oh my, did I break something. Oh dear, I am sorry.” She said truly embarrassed. “I’ll go and see if they need any help.” Lin started to get up from her unfinished lunch to see if she could help. As she did everyone started to laugh, she now had a puzzled look on her face. “Why are you all laughing?” She asked the group. Then her expression changed to one of relief once she realized they were playing a joke on her. At the same time Emil walked in to the dining hall. “You guys, you got me. I was thinking my stay here was over before the end of my first day.” Emil then spoke once his laughter at Lin’s expense had subsided.
“Well it’s tradition to poke fun at the new guy here. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive us. But it’s all in good fun.
Lin sat quietly then began to cry, then broke into hysterics. Emily had a look of concern thinking he had truly embarrassed Lin. He went over to her and tried to comfort her. As he knelt down beside her she looked at him and smiled. “I got you Emil; I’ve been able to produce tears on command since I was little. It only works about twice.”
My mom figured it out pretty quickly when I was young, but I’ve seemed to take the bait and fell for it beautifully.” Lin explained as she now began to laugh, Emil’s expression changed into a big smile, he stood up and took his seat once again.
“Well she’s going to fit in here just fine.” Anali said smiling at her new friend. “I think Emil was almost going to throw up there, he was so worried. Great one Lin, I’ve got remember that one. You are going to have to get Ardin with that one for sure. Maybe we will run into him on the way back.” Once everyone calmed down they all continued to eat their lunches and talked about their day so far. Lin told everyone about her earlier discovery and everyone congratulated her. After finishing lunch Lin stood up.
“I should be getting back to work now, It’s been a really enjoyable lunch, and thanks again for the welcome.” Lin said smiling at Emil. Lin an Anali walked together out of the dining hall back towards the center of the station. Once down the hall they bumped into Ardin.
“Oh good, you’ve had lunch, I assume you were welcomed properly in there?” Ardin said with a smirk.
“It was awful Ardin, they all made fun of me, I’m off to Kuval’s office now to make a complaint.” Lin said with tears in her eyes once again.
“Oh my, could they have gone overboard.” Ardin thought to himself with a worried look on his face as he suggested the particulars of this morning’s prank. “I’m so sorry Lin, they should not have pushed it as far as this and make you upset. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you? It was my Idea.”
“Yes there is.” Lin said sternly, waiting for a few minutes for her payback to sink in. “You can now go and tell Kuval all about how you upset me and take the blame for all of this.”
“This girl has got talent.” Anali thought to herself, enjoying Ardin’s reaction.
Lin continued. “And further more I think you should be expelled from the station for such and outright unforgiving action.” Then she hit him playfully on the right shoulder in disapproval and giving Ardin a sick feeling and looked horribly embarrassed and sorry. “Are you sorry for this Ardin?” Lin asked overstated.
“Yes, please forgive me.” Ardin answered sweetly.
At this point Anali could no longer contain herself and began to giggle, which in turn caused Lin’s expression to change to a smile and she too could not hold it and laughed as well. Soon both of them were laughing uncontrollably in the middle of the hallway. Ardin’s expression changed immediately. “You were kidding the whole time? Why that was unfair, you are good Lin, you had me going. Yep you’ll fit in just right around here, especially around Emil and Timit. Well I guess I got what I deserved, I’m off to lunch. And Lin, very well done today so far, go ahead and get another couple of hours on the telescope and then we will get together later and see what you’ve come up with.”
“Ok Ardin, thanks for the laugh.” Lin said as she and Anali walked away towards the center once again. As they arrived Kuval came out of the door and said hello.
“Hello ladies, enjoy your lunch?” Kuval asked with a questioning look. “Having fun at Ardin’s expense I presume?”
“Yes, Lin here got everyone at lunch and Ardin just now. She got all of us pretty good.” She smiled at her friend, Lin returned the smile.
“Well I guess I will hear all about it as I am off to get lunch. Lin I have an area of space I would like you to look at over the next couple of weeks, it’s an area we’ve not studied yet. I sent the coordinates to your work station. See you two ladies later.” Kuval said as he left for lunch.
Lin and Anali took seats at their desk and continued their work. Lin looked at the coordinates Kuval sent her. The coordinates were in quadrant seven in the southern sky. An area that held many mysteries as the station had the only telescope capable of viewing this part of the sky. A telescope was under construction for just this endeavor but had fallen into some technical difficulties. This must be why Kuval wants me to study this area, to get a head start until the new ground telescope was finished in the next few months. Lin spent the better part of the next few weeks learning all that she could about this area of space and cataloging all that she discovered along the way. She would report to Kuval and Ardin at their daily meetings. So far nothing out of the ordinary had been found. Lin fell into a routine over the next two weeks. Anali and Lin had become fast friends along with Emil and Timit. Everyone on the station was getting along well working towards a common goal. Lin’s routine was welcome as she was really enjoying all that the station has to offer. It had just become her fourth week on Manara and Lin was steadily working on an area of space she had been studying all this while but in an unexplored area of it. She soon began adjusting the frequencies of the telescope and got excited when she discovered something exciting on a high band frequency. It looked close to what Amaria had using in communications circles but a few decades out of date. She immediately tagged the signal for further study and recorded it for about thirty minutes. Astonishment and curiosity overcame her as she stopped the recording. She got up from her desk and went over to Ardin. “Hey, I’ve found a very interesting and puzzling signal in quadrant seven. The one Kuval’s having looking at over the last couple of weeks. I think we should let him know.”
“Sure, ok. You have the file number handy?” Ardin asked with excitement leading the way to Kuval’s office. So far for the past few weeks Ardin and Lin had worked together well and could almost anticipate each other when it came down to a discovery noteworthy enough to present for naming, certification and Kuval’s attention. Ardin opened Kuval’s door and Lin followed him in.
“Yes, I have it written down on this pad.” Lin answered showing Ardin the white pad of paper she had in her left hand.
“Come in you too, I assume you have something to show me.” Kuval asked with anticipation, every time they had come in together there was yet another great discovery. To date, together they had found two planets of Amaria size, one red gas giant star and a super nova.
“Yes Kuval, our local discovery hog here has yet another file for us to look at.” Ardin said with a smile towards Lin. “I have yet to look at it, but Lin’s expression when she came over was enough of an excuse to show you for me.”
“Ok then, have a seat and we will take a look at it. I’ve already screened it briefly as soon as Lin flagged it. I must say, what you have found is extraordinary Lin. This could be a find of a life time if we are right.” Kuval grabbed the remote from his desk and then pointed it at the screen on his wall. The signal was now clearly displayed with all the data elements in a column on the ride side. “I immediately saw why you flagged this signal Lin, It is indeed very interesting.” Kuval then looked over to Ardin. “What do you make of it Ardin.”
Ardin studied the data from his seat, his expression changed to that of surprise as he stood up as to get a better look at the data stream. “You have got to be kidding me.” Ardin said with hesitation in his voice and then looked over at Lin. “Do you realize what you have found Lin? This signal is from a non terrestrial source, not from around here for sure. I my word, this is fantastic.” Ardin said with excitement.
Lin could feel a tingly sensation from her feet to her head as she realized what Ardin was saying, she has stumbled on an alien signal. That meant there work was going to pay off at last. She was now shaking with excitement as she was sure Kuval and Ardin must be, they both had great big smiles and then they both sat back down. Lin could not sit, she was still too excited. She looked over to Kuval and asked. “Are we sure this is not a naturally occurring radio signal Kuval?” Lin asked to be the voice of reason and not to jump to a conclusion to quickly.
“Yes, it’s defiantly not from our neighborhood, we will have to get everyone in on this one, figure out the distance and possibilities are endless. We need to tread lightly as not to cause alarm before we know what this means and is.” Kuval sated with more excitement than he could bear and took a drink of water from a glass that was on his desk. “Ardin will you go ahead and have Anali get a meeting together with everyone and I will disseminate tasks for everyone to accomplish. Lin you stay here in the meantime and we’ll look at this signal anew and see if there is more to it.” Lin pulled up her chair closer to Kuval’s desk; Kuval then had the live feed from the radio telescope liked to the screen on the wall. At the same time Ardin left the office and walked over to Anali’s desk to have her request the meeting. Kuval and Lin studied the live feed for several minutes until Ardin’s return. As Ardin entered the office again he told Kuval that everyone would be in the office shortly. Kuval then stood up turned the monitor off and motioned for Ardin and Lin to join him at a closet on the left side of the room, as he opened the door he handed each of them two chairs, they both got the idea and set the chairs up in a semi circle around the display screen on the wall. Kuval pulled out five more chairs, as Lin and Ardin finished setting up the last of the chairs Celine and Dania the two computer technicians arrived and walked into Kuval’s office.
“What the big news?” Celine asked of group.
“Lin has discovered something big, have a seat and I will explain once the other have arrived.” Kuval instructed them.
Celine and Dania took a couple of seats in the front close to the screen as they did the rest of station crew necessary began to arrive. The five engineers, Fianne, Niara, Athia, Pardja and Quint all arrived and took seats close together, followed by the astronomers Rindan and Timit all of them began to talk back and forth wondering why they had been called into a meeting with everyone. Generally if a signal or discovery needed conformation it was just sent to the operators for further study. After everyone was seated and calm Kuval stood up behind his desk. “Welcome everyone, I have called all of you here today to first let you know that Lin here has discovered something astounding, also to inform you of what we need to accomplish over the next few days. That being said, first all current projects are suspended until further notice without my prior approval, second, no outgoing communications are to be made with the same restriction, thirdly, I need everyone on their toes with this one. Finally here is the signal. Kuval turned the monitor back on with the remote. Everyone’s attention was now directed towards the screen as they were all curious about what Lin had discovered. “As you can all see at this point, Lin found a radio signal with a frequency close to that of what we on Amaria used decades ago. Also you can see by the strength and modulation of it indicated a great distance away but a powerful enough source to reach us. This radio signal has data in it. Which you all now realize the implications of such a discovery by now? So here are you assignments hence forth. Lin and Ardin are to start searching for and recording more of the signal, Celine, Dania, I want you to dedicate all computer memory to recording and backing up the signal; you may request additional computer storage from home as necessary. Fianne and the rest of you engineers I need you to make sure that Celine and Dania have uninterrupted power, and help with deciphering the data portions of the signal and assist Timit and Rindan in their distance and point of origin calculations. Timit, Rindan that’s your task. I’ll let that information sink in for a few minutes.” Kuval then sat down and watch as everyone erupted into mass congratulations to Lin and questions as well.
After several minutes Kuval stood once again and excused everyone from his office, Anali came in shortly after and helped Kuval put away the chairs with Lin. As Lin finally walked back to her desk she felt a little overwhelmed with the attention she had received. There was now a lot of pressure on her. As she sat Ardin noticed from his desk that Lin look apprehensive. “It’s going to be ok Lin; we will all help you in figuring out what this is and how to proceed from there ok.”
“Thanks Ardin, I will do my best to help in any way I can.” Lin said a little apprehensive. She felt that her contributions to come would be hard to come by and was wondering if Kuval had indeed made the right choice.
“Listen Lin, you have already contributed greatly so far, your skills as a researcher and scientist has surfaced since you came here. You should be proud of your accomplishments. No one could have done better than you.” Ardin told her and he meant it.
“You are the best Ardin, I feel better now. I guess I am just a little overwhelmed, but what you said helped. I know I will be able to help. I am excited beyond anything before this.” Lin responded to Ardin smiling and excited with what was to come. “I guess we should get back to work huh?”
“Yes, we certainly should. I’ll get started with your last recording and you get to the live feed and see what else you can find.”
Lin and Ardin had been working at their desks for several hours when Celine walked up to Lin’s desk thrilled with something she had found out. “I’ve found something interesting in the data; it indicates that there is defiantly more here. I have been working on a portion of the signal for over an hour and I came up to show you what I found, if I may?” She said indicating to Lin’s terminal and then opened a file she was referring to. “Here’s what I have been working on. As you can see here in the data portion there is a variation in signal strength, frequency and modulation, it indicates an audio track to the data. I was unable to decode that portion as of yet but here, listen to what I have extracted from the recording so far.” Celine pulled up the audio she had and played it for them, at first only static could be heard, but soon you could hear vocalization in the sound. It was defiantly speech of some sort. “As you can here it is something talking here, it’s a language far different from any here but you can hear the changes in pitch indicating educated speech patterns. There is more, I have the computer extracting more. It took about a half hour to extract this much.”
Both Ardin and Lin looked at Celine with amazement realizing what was in the signal. “I can’t believe this, this is incredible. Lin you are going to be famous. Ardin told them both. “Wow…… that is all I can say, wow.” Ardin was animated with excitement for all of them, he could hardly contain himself. As he looked at Lin he could tell by her mannerisms she was the same.
“This is wonderful news Celine, thank you for brining this to our attention. Kuval said as he walked up to Lin’s desk. No one had noticed him walk up. “Lin you should be congratulated again, this discovery will certainly change our planets view of the universe. I am certain you will be famous as Ardin said.” Lin gave them all a hug in appreciation.
“I am so happy that this has happened, you guys have helped me learn all of this since I arrived on Manara. I am proud to work with all of you; this is going to be a team effort. I don’t want to take all of the credit. Celine is the one who found the audio track, and I am sure everyone else will contribute to it as well.” Lin explained.
“That is very kind of you Lin, are you sure about this?” Celine asked Lin.
“Yes I am. Kuval will you wait and don’t announce this until we have more and then report to ASI our discovery.” Lin asked indicated everyone at the station.
“Of course, if that is what you want, then that is what will happen. You will ultimately get the credit for the initial find as that part is already done and logged in the system. But everyone else will share in the findings.” Kuval explained to them.
“Thank you Kuval, I feel much better, the butterflies in my stomach have finally stopped doing somersaults.” Lin said with a smile as she sat back down at her desk, Celine grabbed a chair and began helping Lin with the live feed. Lin began to see there was more and more coming in. After recording the signal for more than an hour Lin and Celine decided to take a break for dinner. Lin invited Anali and Ardin to join them. As they sat eating their dinner Emil took a seat at the table and asked about what all the excitement today was about.
“What’s going on today, everyone seems to be in a great mood but very busy at work. No one came in for lunch today.” Emil asked confused, normally no one missed a meal on the station.
“We have found a very interesting radio signal today and have been very busy analyzing it. I guess all of us were too engrossed in what we were doing and missed lunch.” Lin explained to Emil.
“Oh I see what type of radio signal did you find?”
“We can’t discuss the particulars yet; we are still unsure ourselves and are still working on it.” Celine told him. “I sure you will hear all about it soon enough.”
Lin cool tell Emil was a little disappointed about not being told what was going on. “Emil, it’s not that we don’t want to tell you about it, it’s just Kuval told us to not to talk about it too much.”
“It’s ok, you can tell him Lin.” Kuval said as he walked into the dining hall. “We can trust everyone on the station.” As Kuval grabbed himself some food from the kitchen Lin and Celine let Emil in on what had happened up to this point.
“Wow, that’s amazing Lin you should be very happy about you discovery.” Emil stated with a smile.
“I’m not going to take all of the credit; I’m going to share in the fame with everyone here.” Lin told Emil. “I’m sure Amil and everyone else will hear about this very soon.” As Lin finished speaking Dr. Binaji walked in.
“What’s everyone talking about? I heard a rumor.” Binaji asked everyone in dining hall.
“Well have a seat and I’ll tell you all, Anali will you contact everyone and tell them I would like a full staff meeting here in five minutes.” Kuval instructed realizing now would be a good time to inform everyone at once.
“Sure thing Kuval, I’ll get on it right now.” Anali then stood up and went to the communications panel next to the door of the kitchen. She pressed the intercom button for an announcement. “Attention all station personnel there is a full staff meeting in the dinning all in five minutes.” Anali made the announcement and repeated herself to make sure it was understood.
“Thank you Anali, we will just wait for everyone to get her then I will explain everything.”
Emil could not contain his anticipation as the doctor looked at him for answers. “It’s great news Binaji, great news.” In the next few minutes all of the staff arrived and took seats at the dining tables.
“Well I guess some of you are now wondering why you have been called here.” Kuval began to explain the events of the day. Once he finished the full story everyone congratulated Lin on her discovery. Lin’s face turned red in embarrassment as they did this. “Now that all of you know what’s expected I would like all of us to meet in central and report on any further findings as I am sure all of you including myself will be working late.” Kuval told the group. Dinner progressed for the next hour as everyone was updated on their individual progress so far. Everyone went back to their stations once dinner was over. Everyone including Lin worked late into the night. Several hours later one by one all staff member began to depart to their rooms as everyone was now tired from the day’s events.
Lin was sitting on her bed trying to unwind a little when Anali came in. “What a day huh Lin, I am exhausted, you?”
“You bet I am. I’m going to bed now.” Lin said as she lay down on her bed she fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
Lin woke up the next morning feeling much better and was sure today would go by smoothly. Not that yesterday was bad she thought, but very busy. She took a shower and began to get dressed; as she did Anali woke up rubbing her eyes and sighing. Lin smiled at her friend. “Sleep well?”
“Yes thank you.” Anali said yawning. “Give me a few minutes and we’ll go to breakfast together.”
“Ok, sounds good to me.” Lin answered her friend as she finished dressing. Then the both left together for breakfast. Once they had finished eating and cleaned up the both departed for the center of the station to begin work.
Lin sat comfortable at her desk and logged into her work station and began to work. She brought up the latest recording from the night before, as she had found something extraordinary once again. In rapid succession the rest of the team appeared in the center of the station, all with news of what they had discovered during the late hours of working. Kuval came out of his office and saw that everyone had gathered for their reports. “Good morning, it looks as if all of us had a late night. Does anyone have new findings from last night?”
“I do!” Lin almost squeaked as everyone stared at her. “You won’t believe what I found late last night. I was adjusting the telescope off access and doing frequency shifts to confirm the signal. Well I found a secondary signal on another frequency a few megahertz down from the first signal, and a much stronger signal than the first. I was so amazed by I recorded it for four hours last night. This signal was much easier to pick up as if whoever sent it upgraded the signal, almost as if it was sent several years later but with much more power. It has an astonishing amount of data also.” Lin explained hardly containing her excitement. “This signals much as the first will need expert decoding, we are going to need more help with this one I am sure.”
Everyone was stunned with what Lin had just said, unsure what this could possibly be. A discovery of this magnitude twice in one day was astounding too them all. Kuval could see the questioning looks on all of his team and thought for a few seconds more until he spoke. “I am sure all of you are as surprised as I am about all of this. Lin you did another amazing job, you are now famous even if you don’t want it. Let’s all take some time to digest this and meet again in my office in hour.” Kuval instructed everyone. “Lin may I see you in my office?” Kuval indicated toward his office with a smile, and bring up your newest recording.”
“Sure thing Kuval, I will be just a minute.” Lin said as she gathered a notebook off of her desk that had research information in it. She turned towards Kuval’s office and saw that he had leaned over and said something to Anali who was now on the communications channel which she had a head set for that was now sitting on her head. ‘I wonder who she’s calling.’ Lin asked herself as she walked into Kuval’s office. Kuval was sitting at his desk and as she took one of the chairs in the office the display screen came to life and she then opened her note book in order to tell Kuval the correct file number to bring up. “Sir the file number is lin0245_240.rt18.” Kuval selected the file and opened it. The monitor on the wall sprang into life and displayed the data Lin had recorded earlier. The wave form and frequency variations were defiantly more pronounced as the previous recording. This defiantly indicated a substantial amount of data. Not only audio but there is an indication of a very strong secondary channel that could be construed as video data. This was truly an extraordinary discovery Lin had made Kuval thought to himself as he studied the data stream.
“This is wonderful Lin; wow is all I can say.” Kuval said with admiration, he and Lin were startled by and interruption of the intercom buzzer. It was Anali announcing the call Kuval had requested.
“Kuval I have ASI commissioner Sural on the com for you.”
“Thank you Anali.” Kuval said to the intercom, the call was transferred to his office and began to speak to his good friend once again. “Sural my friend, how are you this fine day.”
“I am great Kuval, and you?” Sural responded wondering why his friend would be calling this early in the day.
“Wonderful, I have Linaria in my office with me, and we are calling you to discuss extraordinary discovery she has made yesterday.” Kuval began with excitement. “It’s so big that I had to call you first thing and explain.”
Sural could hear the excitement in his friend’s voice and got excited about what the news had been. Over the last few weeks Lin had indeed discovered a few new objects, stars and even a black hole. She certainly was a great asset to ASI and Manara space station.
“Is it that exciting my friend?” Sural finally asked after taking a deep breath.
“You may want to sit down; it might just blow you away.” Kuval warned his friend.
“I am sitting, spill it. What have you found Linaria? Go ahead my dear.”
“Yes sir, I will start at the beginning if that’s ok.” Lin said and felt as she might be sick; she grabbed a hold of herself and calmed down before beginning. “It a few weeks ago when Kuval asked me to study quadrant seven, you know where we found the latest star clusters. Anyways yesterday I stumbled onto what looked like an interesting signal. I recorded it and brought it to Ardin’s attention immediately. He was as surprised as I was and lead me to Kuval. Kuval put the recording on his screen and studied it for a time and then realized as Ardin and I did, this signal’s origin is not from around here.” Lin took a deep cleansing breath and let what she had said sink in for a few seconds.
“Oh my, um wow.” You could hear the excitement grow in Sural’s voice. “You are all in agreement then, that this is a truly a signal of extraterrestrial origin?” Sural finally asked not sure if he wanted what was surely the only answer that the well trained staff of Manara could give.
“Yes sir.” They all said in unison.
“I need to think for a second to take this all in.” Sural told them.
“Um, there is more to tell sir.” Lin told him with little trepidation.
“More, there more you say. I may have to schedule a trip to the station and get a briefing in person. If you are going to tell me what I am thinking you will.”
“Yes sir, we have confirmed that the first signal I recorded contains vocal data. And the signal I recorded late last night has the potential for video data in it.” Lin explained to Sural and let this piece of huge information sink in further, only silence on the other end could be heard as Lin, Kuval and Ardin waited for Sural to respond.
“What you have just told me is beyond amazing Lin. Kuval you and your team has done a superb job thus far. I would like to come to the station as soon as possible. When can the Jindan be back on Amaria Kuval?”
“As early as this evening letting you leave as early as tomorrow morning.” Kuval responded then looked over at Lin and Ardin. “Would you two like to take the Jindan down and escort Sural up to the station?” Kuval asked them with a smile of pleasure on his face.
“Yes, of course I would be delighted to pilot the Jindan again.” Responded Lin, it had been a week since she had been qualified as a pilot for the Jindan.
“I will go too.” Ardin said quietly.
“Well, ok then. I will see you two in the morning. I want a full brief on the way so I can be up to speed and able to assist you once I arrive. Kuval I will see you tomorrow afternoon, have Emil prepare a nice dinner for all as we will celebrate. As for now I would like to keep this classified for now on.”
“Sure thing Sural, see you tomorrow, bye for now.”
“Ok my friend, you sure now how to make a friends day brighter.”
“Call ends.” Kuval said to the intercom which disconnected the communication. “You too had better get done what you can and then head to the planet after lunch. Lin I am sure you will want to work on the signal a bit more so you can be prepared for Sural’s brief.”
“Yes Kuval, that is for sure. I will do my best not to embarrass myself or you.”
“Of that I am sure Lin, you have proven yourself most capable since arriving here, and you have my fullest confidence.” Kuval said with sincerity. Lin and Ardin excused themselves and went back to their desks. Lin worked on the signal for about three more hours when she was finally interrupted.
“Would you like to get lunch Lin?” Ardin asked as he put his hand on her shoulder.
“Why yes, thank you. I would have worked right through lunch hadn’t you came and got me.” Lin and Ardin departed for the dining hall. They met up with the rest of the crew who were all just starting sitting down to eat.
“I heard you two were headed down to Amaria to fetch the commissioner of ASI himself.” Emil asked them as they took seat at an open table.
“Why yes we are, we are leaving after lunch and coming back tomorrow. He wants to celebrate with all of us for the signal we found.” Lin told Emil nicely.
“Yes, Kuval just called and told me. Now I have to scramble to get a banquet together by tomorrow. Thanks a lot for the trouble Lin.” Emil said with a smile.
“I know you’re kidding me Emil, I’ll let it pass this time. I am too hungry to play your games right now. Can you just go away? Lin said laughing.
“Yes madam.” Emil said as he slithered back into the kitchen. He came out shortly and handed both of them their lunches. “I hope you like this; it’s a special selection of fish for our heroin.” Emil told Lin as he put down the plate in front of Lin.
“You’re just full of jokes today mister, aren’t you?”
“Always, you know me I can’t help myself.” Emil laughed at himself.
“Oh yes, we know you too well Emil.” Ardin said with a smirk. “You just can’t wait for someone to say something you can twist to humor yourself.”
“Yep, well I’ll leave you two alone.” Emil said with a wink towards Ardin as he disappeared into the kitchen. The sound of water could be heard as dishes were being cleaned in the kitchen.
“What was that wink about?” Lin questioned Ardin
“He thinks I like you and well he’s right. I do like you Lin.”
“You do, I like you too.” Lin said smiling
“Really, that’s great, I was hopping so. I did not say anything because I did not want to ruin our friendship.” Ardin told Lin honestly.
“Same here, let’s just see how things go, we should take this one day at a time.”
“I agree Lin; we will take it slow, for now.” Ardin said smiling back at her.
Lin and Ardin sat in silence as they finished their lunch. Then they got up and left towards Jindan’s docking port stopping by their perspective rooms for a change of clothes for the next day. Once they reached the Jindan Lin and Ardin boarded then Lin completed the preflight and departed for Amaria. They landed at the space port in short time. The grabbed a late transport to towards Jualdia school and stayed in a lodge near the campus. The next morning while finishing getting dressed after an early start Lin heard a knock on her door, she opened the door and it was Ardin. “Hello, good morning Ardin, you’re up early.” Lin greeted him with a warm smile.
“Good morning to you too, would you like to grab some breakfast before we head over to Sural’s office to pick him up?” Kuval asked Lin politely.
“Sure, I would like that.” Lin answered with a bigger smile than before.
Ardin lead Lin to the diner that was part of the lodge they were staying at. The café was small but nice. The server took their orders and came back with drinks soon after. Breakfast went by fast for them and soon they were on their way walking through the campus of Jualdia. A short time passed as they were enjoying each other’s company and arrived at Sural’s office.
“Good morning Linaria, Ardin nice to see you both.” Sural said to them as they entered his office. “I’ll be ready to go in a few minutes; I just need to grab a few more things.” Sural stuffed a few more papers into his case and grabbed his bag. “Ok I’m ready, let’s get a move on.” Sural followed Lin and Ardin across the campus to the transport stop and boarded the first one to arrive. In short time all of them had stowed Sural’s bags into the Jindan and were on their way to Manara space station. Lin briefed Sural on all that had transpired the last few days. Sural was truly astonished; this discovery truly meant that their understanding of the universe and their own world would be changing fast. Lin’s brief lasted over an hour when Sural patted her on the shoulder and told her that was a great brief. “Thank you Lin that was a great brief. I understand now why you had informed me so quickly. Now I think I will get a little rest for the remainder of the trip, just wake me up about a half hour prior to reaching the station. I don’t want to miss the view.”
“No problem sir, we have about another hour and a half. I’ll wake you up.” Lin told him as Sural then leaned back closed his eyes for the remainder of the flight.
This is a NON TG element Science Fiction Fantasy. More about the signal is found, Linaria and friends work together to get to the answer and plans are in work for a special visit. Please comment on characters and flow.
“I am glad you liked the trip my good friend.” Kuval said as he walked up to Sural and gave him a friendly hug and pat on the back. “Welcome to Manara.” He said as they broke the friendly embrace and the two friends smiled at each other and began reminiscing about old times as they walked towards the dining hall. Lin and Ardin could not help themselves smile as the two were talking back and forth about years past and wondered if they too would be doing the same thing when they were older. Kuval explained the functions of the work spaces as they passed them along the way.
“Here’s the dining hall; I took the liberty of assembling all of the station staff here so we can all join in the brief.” All of the staff of the station had gathered in the dining hall and were in groups chatting as Kuval lead Sural and Lin to the head of the table were there were three chairs set up. “Hello everyone, please take your seats, Sural you take the seat on the right, Lin the one in the middle and I’ll take the last one.” Sural, Lin and Kuval took their seats along with the rest of the staff. “I am sure most of you know the commissioner of ASI Sural here. He is here because of our discovery and is here to help facilitate informing the chancellor and the rest of Amaria. He is also here to make sure we have enough resources allocated to make all of this happen.” Kuval explained to the staff of Manara space station.
Sural stood and greeted everyone. “Thank you for the welcome Kuval, as you said I am here to assist you in getting all of you what you need. Keep in mind that this will become a topic of high visibility once it’s announced. Be sure and warn your families of impending contact with news media that will surely want to know more about each of you. I am having the head of the journalism department come up to the station with two news crews in five days in order to record for Amaria your discoveries. Lin you will be our star and the leader of the team.” Sural instructed eloquently to the group then smiled at Lin and indicated for her to address the group on the plan they had discussed on the way to the station.
Sural had talked Lin into accepting the lead roll and the additional task of being the face of Manara for the news crews. “Thank you Sural for this opportunity to present to the world our discovery. I know all of you have already put long hours and have worked hard to accomplish our goal of translating the audio portion of the first signal. Our plan now is to dedicate most of our efforts in decoding the video portion of the second signal. We have over four hours to work with and I am sure there is probably more. I made the suggestion of having the space probe Shamist that is almost ready for launch reprogrammed and sent in the direction of the signal. If it works as I think it will we can use it as a booster and get more and better quality signal as its distance to the original source becomes less. I am sure all of you are surprised with this as the Shamist was to be utilized for other scientific research, but I think having this capability will greatly assist us in our endeavors. Two of you will continue to work on the audio signal. I would like you Niara and Athia to focus on that aspect. I know you have a great task ahead of yourselves and if you need assistance don’t hesitate to ask. Once we are done eating I will lay out everyone else’s tasks at a meeting in Kuval’s office in one hour.” Lin explained her and Sural’s plan and she then sat back down taking a deep breath. She was wondering if everyone would accept her as the leader of the team.
“As you all know Linaria was my choice for junior apprentice on Manara and has my full confidence in team leader for this, Linaria will you please stand up?” Lin stood back up with a confused look on her face. “Everyone please rise for an announcement.” Kuval paused for a second smiled at Lin and then made his declaration. “Linaria in recognition of your continued excellence and steadfast devotion to your duties Junior Apprentice I hereby give you the distinct honor and position as a full staff member and title of sis associate scientist for Manara Space Station and the Amaria Space Institute and now have the full rights and privileges of such an appointment. You have my congratulations.” Kuval handed Lin a certificate indicating her selection, and at the same time Emil came out of the kitchen with a cake with congratulations Linaria on it and as he placed it on the table in front of her everyone at the table stood and clapped fiercely in congratulations and each of them came up to her and shook her hand, all except Anali who gave her a great big hug. As she stood in disbelief and an incredible smile and red flushed face. "By the way this was their idea.” Kuval indicating everyone seated at the table. “Everyone insisted on it, I am sure they must have been thinking the same thing because each of them came to me within minutes of each other and my office was soon overflowing with your friends.”
Lin could not believe what has just happened, she could not be happier that at this moment, and could no longer hold back here tears. “I don’t know if I truly deserver such an honor I’ve only been here three weeks, thank you everyone, you are all great friends and coworkers I accept this appointment with happiness and humility.”
“We all love you Lin, you are most welcome.” Anali said holding back her own tears for her friend.
Another round of congratulations started as everyone come up to Lin and shook her hand or gave her a friendly hug. After everyone had made their way to Lin and took their seats Sural was the last to congratulate her and handed Lin a patch for her uniforms jumper that read ‘Linaria, Associate Scientist at the top and at the bottom Manara Space Station, ASI. “Congratulations Lin, you deserved this appointment. Kuval called me last night after you and Ardin left for Amaria. You almost caught me with the certificate when you got to my office earlier.”
“I can’t thank you enough for this; I will proudly serve ASI and all of you to the best of my abilities.” Lin said with modesty. Shorty after everyone finished their cake and final congratulations as the left only Sural, Kuval, Lin and Emil remained in the dining hall. “Thank you for a wonderful night Kuval.” Lin thanked them.
“You are most welcome my dear.” Sural said with a smile. “Now I think all of us should get back to work and prepare for our next meeting shall we?”
“Yes of course, Lin would you gather your research and notes then come to my office when you’re ready. You have about 20 minutes as the celebration when a little longer than I had planned, you are going to have to make up for lost time little lady.” Kuval snickered to Lin as all three of them walked out of the dining hall, leaving Emil to clear the mess.
“See you all later at dinner, nice job Lin.” Emil yelled towards them as the disappeared down the corridor.
Lin arrived at her desk with Sural following behind her, Kuval continued to his office handing Anali a folder as he past her desk. Lin offered Sural a seat next to her desk and then sat herself she then logged onto her computer and grabbed her research folder and jotted down a few notes as she waited for her computer to log in. Lin then opened up the live feed of the signal and began recording more so she would have more data to work with for the decoding portion of the project. Sural was sitting intently watching everything she was doing for several minutes.
“You have quite a knack for this. It took me years to master this type of system.” Sural said to her with little envy.
“I had help, Ardin is a wonderful instructor and well I kind of picked it up pretty quickly.” She boasted but not on purpose. Sural could understand that she was trying to justify to herself her new position.
“You’re doing fine Lin, just keep up the good work, and of course we will all help.” Sural reassured her.
“Thanks, well here is the latest recording from quadrant seven.” Lin pointed at her computer screen. “It defiantly has more data than expected compared to the first one. I am going to run a few algorithms on it and see if we can get a look at what seems to be an image. It will take several hours to run, hopefully we will have something by the time are meeting is over.” Lin then pressed for the program to run then picked up her folders and indicated to Sural Kuval’s office and got up and led the way. Lin smiled at Anali as the passed and went into Kuval’s office. Sural took a seat in the back row of chairs; Lin took a position to the left of the screen at a podium Kuval had set up for this occasion. Members of the team began falling in and taking seats as Lin was making final preparations for her presentation. Once everyone was seated she began by turning on the screen with the remote that Kuval had conveniently placed on the podium. Everyone was sitting in silence while Lin went over everyone’s responsibilities. “Celine, you Danie, Fianne and Pardja will work with me on the video portion of the signal, Timit and Rindan I need you guys to get distance and location figured out, Quint you’ll be helping them out with calculations, otherwise you can help Celine and the rest. I think we should meet every day to discuss any issues that may arise, and I think that we can best accomplish this during evening meal. This will give Niara and Athia a chance also to give us feedback on theirs as well.” Lin explained the project ahead of them. “Are there any questions at this point?”
“I have one.” Ardin spoke up wondering why he had been excluded in the teams. “What is my job going to be?”
“Oh yah, you, um well, I guess you can help out Emil and Amil in the kitchen.” She told him laughing.
“You are bad, you know that don’t you.” Ardin told her smiling at her joke.
“No I didn’t forget about you, you are going to have the toughest job of all. I want you to handle the arduous task of getting together three linguists and see if we can translate the language if at all.” Lin told him, the look of shear fear appeared on his face, he had realized the difficulty of not only the possibility of translating the unknown language but finding three linguists to bring to the station would be demanding.
“Thanks, I think. Sural do you have any recommendations as to who I could recruit for this insane task?” Ardin asked the commissioner of Jualdia.
“I might know a few; I’ll get back with you at dinner tonight. I will make a call and have some names for you to decide from by then.”
“Thank you, I will do my best.” Ardin then sat quietly as Lin finished her presentation.
“Now that you all know your tasks I ask that you all look at the extracted recording I will be sending you later today. I have the computer running an algorithm on the signal to see if we can get an image or an idea of what we are dealing with. That’s all for now, see you all at dinner.” Lin excused them and everyone but Ardin and Kuval remained.
“I hate you, you know that don’t you.” Ardin told Lin playfully. “Just kidding, I will have my choices to you by the morning.” He then turned to Kuval and excused himself. “See you at dinner.” Then smiled at Lin. “You too, BOSS!” He turned towards the door to leave and get back to work when He stopped and turned back to Lin. “Wait a second; I just had an interesting thought what if instead of three linguist I get two and on anthropologist as well, if we do in fact get a look at an actual picture we may want an anthropologist to give us an opinion on what we are looking at.” Ardin said with a smile as if he had an epiphany.
“That is a wonderful idea Ardin, Sural what do you think about it?” Lin asked.
“I agree an anthropologist will make a great addition. I will add a few of those names to the list as well. Kuval, how will these additions affect space available on the station?” Ardin then walked out as Sural asked about station capacity he wanted to make sure the station could handle the additional personnel.
“With adding those three to the 19 we have now we will have 22 bodies that will leave space for two more for a total of 24. So if you are thinking of brining some journalists aboard keep that in mind.” Kuval explained to him. “And we have enough supplies, food and water for another week with our current inventory.”
“Ok, that’s good news, I will defiantly be considering media presence in the future, but for now I want all of us to focus on the task at hand in the mean time. I will consult with the entire team before progressing that far. I don’t want that type of attention interfering with progress.” Sural assured them of his not wanting this to go public too quickly.
“Well that’s it for now, if there is nothing else I will get back to work.” Lin asked.
“No that’s it as far as I can tell; you did a nice job Lin.” Kuval told her.
“Thank you Kuval.” Lin smiled at Kuval as she left his office and returned to her desk. Sural remained in the office to get some names for Ardin.
Lin sat at her desk and brought up the extracted data that the program that she had been running to see how much had been completed so far. The status bar showed about twenty percent done thus far. Lin audibly sighed as this would take a lot of time to finish the rest. She then sent the data to Celine and walked out of the center office down to Celine’s cubical. As she entered the mainframe area she walked up to Celine and greeted her with a frown. “Hi Celine, I sent you the data that my algorithm extracted and it’s only twenty percent done. It’s going to probably take until tomorrow afternoon to finish the entire file.” Lin explained to her a little disappointed that they did not have more to work with.
“It’s fine what you sent Lin, this task is new and I know you’re doing your best. Don’t fret this is more than I expected in this short of time. You should be happy we have anything to start with, this small of a file will give us a chance to calibrate our machines and make it a bit easier to do that.” Celine told her squashing Lin’s fears.
“Thanks Celine, I guess we should get started.” Lin said humbly, Celine, Diane and Fianne worked on the signal for the rest of the evening, as a group they all worked as a team and came together and found the signal defiantly had off set carriers and that is far but that is as far as they had gotten. After closing out the work stations they had been using and go to dinner. “I think we should call it a night and get back at it in the morning it’s about five minutes until diner anyways.” Lin told them as she yawned and got up. The four of them walked slowly to the dining hall and took seats at the almost full tables. The four girls were the last to show and Lin grabbed the glass of water that was on the table and drank it whole. Diner appeared quickly as Emil and Amil placed the food on the tables, each smiling at everyone as they progressed down the tables.
“You look a bit tired Lin.” Emil said with a slight smile trying to brighten her up.
“Yah I am tired as are all of us I am sure, thanks for the smile Emil I feel better now.” Lin smiled back at Emil thankful for his sweet attitude. Lin then informed everyone of their progress so far and let everyone else update the team on their progress as well. So far the find of the offset carrier was the only progress so far. “I know all of you have put in a hard day, we should all get a good night’s rest and start fresh in the morning.” Everyone agreed and finished eating. As they all started leaving for the night Sural stopped Ardin just before he got up to leave.
“Ardin I have a list of names for you to consider here.” Sural explained as he handed him a folder with names in it. “Just don’t reveal the purpose to any of them until you have made your choice and then explain it to them once they agree and arrive on the station.”
“Ok I will get on it right away, thanks for getting this to me early; the extra time will be nice.” Ardin thanked Sural then walked out of the dining hall. “Hey Lin, thanks again for this opportunity to select these team members. I gave it more thought today and realized this is an important decision.”
“You’re welcome Ardin. Have a good night.” Lin was pleased that Ardin took to this task easier than earlier. She then walked out of the corridor towards her room.
“Good night Lin.” Ardin said to her as they separated in the hall.
As Lin walked into the room she saw that Anali had already changed for bed. “What a day, I thought It would never end. If you don’t mind I want to call my mom and give her the good news about my appointment.” Lin asked her friend.
“Of course I don’t mind, I finally get to meet her if I can.” Anali asked excited for Lin and wanted to meat Verana.
“Sure you can talk to her with me, you’re my best friend.” Lin said as she gave Anali a hug then they walked over to the communications screen on the wall. Lin placed the call and Verana Lin’s mother answered.
“Hello Lin, it’s nice to hear from you.” Verana said with a big smile, pleased to see her daughter again after a long week.
“Hi mom, this standing next to me is Anali.” Lin pointed to Anali and embracing her arm.
“Hi Verana, it’s nice to finally meat you.”
“Same her Anali, you are a lovely young woman, in fact Lin has told me all about you.”
“She’s done the same with you. How is your flower garden coming?” Anali asked because Lin had told her that her flower garden had been trampled by some rodents.
“It’s going fine, thank you. Lin so how are you doing?” Verana was anxious to here this week’s events.
“Things are wonderful, especially today mom. I have wonderful news.” Lin told her mom hardly able to contain her excitement.
Lin’s mom’s expression changed instantly, she knew that look was genuine exhilaration in her daughters face. “What the great news honey?”
“You’re not going to believe this but I have been officially appointed to the position as an associate scientist and a full staff member here at Manara.” Lin paused so that could sink in.
“Oh my Lin, that is wonderful, I am so proud of you. How did this come about?” Verana asked with joy for her daughter.
“It just sort of happened mom, it was a group effort. Everyone got together and told Kuval how good I was performing and he decided to give me a full time position. I can’t tell you how happy I am mom. It is simply magnificent to be offered such a spot.” She told her mom not able to hold back the tears of happiness that were welling up.
“Oh now you’ve got me started, now I am crying too.” Anali whipped tears off of her cheek and looked at the screen an saw that Lin’s mom was doing the same and then gave Lin a great big hug. “This hug is for you Verana since you can’t be here in person I’m doing it for both of us.”
“Thank you Anali, you are a true friend to Lin, and I consider you now family.” Verana exclaimed to Anali with affection, Thinking of her as family and becoming so close to Lin.
“That’s wonderful Verana, thank you; your daughter has been like a sister to me. I could not be happier.” Lin then gave Anali a big hug.
“Well Lin you have done well, you keep it up and don’t forget to call me.” Lin’s mom said with a smile.
“I won’t mom, it’s getting late and we have lots to do tomorrow and need to get to bed now. I love you mom, good night.” Lin told her mom as she smiled back.
“I love you to honey, sleep well Anali you too Lin.” Verana said not forgetting to include Lin’s new friend. “Bye.”
“Bye mom.”
“Good night Verana.” Anali said and reached up and pressed the disconnect button on the com panel. “Your mom is a wonderful woman Lin; I wish mine were still around.” She told Lin a little sad.
“I’m sorry Anali, I did not know.” Lin then hugged her friend. “You are part of my family now.”
“Thank you Lin.” Anali hugged her tighter and then felt tired. “We should get to bed now.”
“Your right, I am tired.” Lin and Anali broke the hug then changed for bed, once they booth laid down they fell fast asleep.
Lin had gotten an early start the next morning with Celine and her crew trying to get the visual convert and get a look at it. Things were progressing slowly for several hours and everyone was getting frustrated about not being able to come up with a translation matrix for the video.
Timit walked in with some good news and everyone was happy for the interruption. “I have some great news, Rindan and I with the help of Pardja have located the source and distance of the signals.”
“That’s great Timit.” Lin answered him with glee then asked. “Is it possible for to show us were it is on our star map?”
“Yes it’s possible, Celine if I can borrow a terminal I will show all of you now?” Timit explained as he Celine offered him her chair and computer terminal. He then brought up a map of their home galaxy, it had arrows pointing to discoveries that the station had made. All of which except one were within close proximity to the Amarian solar system. A single blinking red arrow was pointing to a far off location half way across the swirling spear shaped galaxy in a region of space known for great amount of stars. “As you can see by the long range image of the area we now know that the signal originated in this general area. It’s about 70 solar years away from us. If the Shamist is launched on time next week we should be able to get a better view of the area and see if we can detect a solar system by the end of the month.” Timit explained to Lin, Celine and the rest.
“That’s great news Timit; at least we know that the signal did not come from one of our other space probes or satellites for sure now.” Lin said to everyone relieved and glad for the confirmation of what they already suspected.
“How is it going for you so far?” Timit asked the group.
“We are having trouble converting the video, the encoding is far different from what we use and we are trying to decode it into a file type that will display on our system for us.” Lin explained the difficulties her and Celine were having, then Timit made a suggestion.
“I know you had Pardja working with Rindan and myself, but now that part is complete maybe fresh set of eyes will reveal what you are looking for.”
That’s a good idea; we need a break from staring at these computers for so long. Why don’t you let him know we would like his help?” Lin asked Timit and nodded her thanks.
“Sure, I will be right back.” Timit then walked out to get Pardja.
Lin, Celine and the rest then stood up to stretch and took a break while waiting for Pardja. It took just a few minutes for him to arrive. “Thank you for coming Pardja.” Lin explained to him the troubles they were having.
“I will gladly help ladies; this is one of my specialties. I took a secondary course in graphics media and video editing and transmissions. Maybe this will help.”
“I certainly hope so; we are at a loss for answers right now.” Celine told him with a frown.
“It’s nothing to fret about Celine; I had similar problems earlier this year with a project.”
“He’s right Celine, that’s why we are a team and work so well together, we all fill in where and when needed.” Lin then patted Celine on the shoulder for support.
“Ok, I’ll get started then.” Pardja took a look at what the girls already had done to this point and began writing his own decoding protocol. The girls sat wide eyed as Pardja’s fingers glided over the key board effortlessly and in a short time an image appeared on the screen and then a silence fell over the room followed by a load gasp by everyone. On the screen was a figure of a person not unlike the Amarian’s, there were differences of course, but the grainy picture made a full identification difficult. But at least they could see a partial image at last.
Lin then stood up and walked over to the communications panel and made and announcement and everyone in the room understood the reason. She pressed the general announcement button the spoke. “Attention all staff, this is Lin, please report to computer center immediately, we have found something amazing and you all have got to see this.” Lin emphasized the announcement and waited for everyone to show. “Pardja will you close that image for now, I want to see everyone’s reaction at the same time.
In a short time the rest of the station staff piled into the computer center were the mainframe was located. Whispering and chattering grew loader as the room filled up as they were wondering why they were summoned.
“Ok everyone gather round and pay attention to the middle screen as I pull up what we have found.” Pardja said with a big grin as he pulled up the image on the center screen. All those that had just gathered gasped as once again the screen was filled with the blurry image of a figure with a head and arms. Soon the room erupted in muttering conversation as they were talking about the image displayed. “So what do you think of Lin’s discovery now Kuval.”
“I….uh…um….I am at a loss for words, this is just astonishing, wow.” Kuval had trouble with getting his words started as he was extremely excited about what they were seeing. “Lin this is astounding, Pardja you did a nice job on that, is there a possibility of cleaning up the image?” Kuval finally asked.
“Yes sir, I will just have to tweak the program a bit and should be able to have more by the tomorrow evening. This is just one frame from the whole recording I would like to see more as I am sure all of you do as well.” Pardja explained.
“Oh yes of course we will want to see the whole recording, we are just excited about just seeing this little bit, it sure gives us a lot to talk about.” Kuval finally said and after a deep breath then looked over at Ardin. “How is your selection going Ardin, we will need those quickly now, now that we have an image and part of the first audio to work with.”
“Funny you should ask sir, I was on my way to tell you of my selections when the call came over to meet here.”
“That’s great, who did you choose?” Kuval said anxious to hear about Ardin selections.
“For the anthropologist I chose Dr. Surmat, he came highly recommended by his colleagues, and for the linguists it’s Dr. Gilia and Dr. Lumar.” Ardin let everyone know of his choices.
“That’s great timing, I know of Dr. Surmat well, Gilia and Lumar I have heard of. Their reputations are well known, nice choices Ardin, have you spoken to them?”
“Yes, they are only aware that they are needed for consultation on a secret project for ASI, and I told them to prepare to be away for a week or more. I will meet them at ground control this evening and brief them of the actual task on the way here.”
“That a great plan Ardin, you have my approval to leave at once.” Kuval said.
“I will go also, I need to be on the ground to help coordinated anything you might need, and that will free up space for other’s as you might need.” Sural told Kuval.
“Ok sir you two have a safe trip.” Kuval said to them both. “See you tomorrow afternoon Ardin.” Kuval said turning toward Ardin.
Ardin and Sural left and headed for the Jindan.
Lin stood and asked for further help. “I know it’s getting close to lunch but I would like everyone’s help in the continued decoding and translation of these images. Say let’s get back here in one hour, which gives us time for lunch.” Everyone agreed then they set off to lunch. Emil had a spread laid out on the tables as the team entered the dining hall. “I hope you all like the food Amil and I laid out for you, I know you all have been working hard, enjoy.” Emil told them with a bright smile.
Everyone sat and loaded their plates and then enjoyed the lunch. “Thanks Emil, this is great we needed that good food to keep us going, nice job.” Lin said thanking him and the rest agreed by nodding their heads as their mouths were full of food. The staff finished and then departed the dining hall for the computer center, all thanking Emil and Amil for the lunch as they did and were quickly at work again.
The team refreshed their ideas before getting back at it then Lin had an idea that she had just vaguely remembered something from her mathematics courses. “I have it, what if the originator of this signal uses math based on ten instead of eight.” Lin enquired the group then continued. “Wouldn’t that make more sense at the data we have been looking at?”
“Your right Lin this could be the key to all of our problems.” Pardja said with a sigh of relief, he was sure he would have taken a week to think of that. “I will tweak the program and run it on the frame from before and see what we get. Lin can you help me with the math on the conversion please?”
“Of course, just tell me the line you need it in and I’ll insert the equation into the code.”
“Line 1097 if you please?” Pardja instructed her. “Thank you for the help.”
“No, thank you Pardja this just proves that our team works together and we’ve accomplished a goal.” Lin thanked him for his efforts as well. Pardja took about an hour to rewrite the code and had Lin insert her equation into the code, once that was completed he made a back up copy and then looked over at Lin and Celine who were sitting next to him. “Are you ready?” He asked as he indicated the run command on his terminal that was highlighted on the screen.
“Yes.” Both girls answered Pardja simultaneously, then Celine turned around too Dania, Fianne and asked them. “You two ready to assist with extra data storage and memory requirements?”
“We’re standing by Celine.” Fianne answered for both of them, and had allocated more space to the new program.
“Thank you, you have a go Pardja.” Lin said after giving a nod to the two girls on the other side of the computer center.
Pardja than selected run and the system began to hum and the team began to wait for what was to come in the next few hours. They took this time to contact Niara and Athia and inform them of the new program and that they should use it for their efforts as well. Niara was the one who had answered the comm.
“Thanks for the information; we’ve been struggling for hours. We will try that on our next run.” She thanked Pardja for the copy of the program he sent her and got back to work.
The team in the computer center was waiting patiently at the terminal for the program to run. Pardja brought up the progress bar and it indicated 30 percent done after about 45 minutes. He looked over at his companion team and asked if anything else could be done. “What else can we do while we wait?”
“Not much, all of this area’s computer power is dedicated to the task.” Fianne Answered and no sooner than completing that sentence the com buzzer had suppressed all the other sounds in the room. Lin got up and pressed the com button to answer the call.
“This is Lin speaking.”
“Kuval here, I have great news Lin, the Shamist launched just over an hour ago and will be in place in two months.” Kuval told her with pleasure.
“Oh, that is great news and a week ahead of time.” Lin then thanked him. “Thanks for the update.”
“You’re welcome, ASI thought it would be a great head start, and we will be linked to it once it comes online and have full access to all its systems at that time, how’s your progress so far.”
“Slow sir, we have the entire system here occupied with decoding the images with a new program. It has promise so much so we sent a copy to Niara and Athia.”
“Ok good; keep in touch see you all at diner, bye.” Kuval finished then the com went silent.
Lin sat back down at the terminal she had called her desk for the last few days. She had not been to her own real desk since starting the work in the computer center. Oh well she thought to herself. Pardja brought up the progress bar from time to time, it was agonizingly slow. The team past the time by filing paperwork and walking around each of the servers making sure they got any needed attention. The day moved slowly until it was time for diner. The progress bar showed 33 percent done and would take well into the next morning to finish the entire recording. Pardja realized this and brought this up to the others. “The status bar is at 33 percent and is going to take until at least until tomorrow. I think it would be a good idea to leave it as is and adjourn until tomorrow.”
“That probably good idea, we have no need to sit here and stare at these screens while we wait.” Lin motioned with her hand towards the monitors in front of them. They then all secured their terminals and left for the dining hall were everyone had gathered and discussed the day’s events.
Lin was in her room shortly after and was sitting on her bed massaging her neck muscles as they were tight. She then dressed for bed and fell asleep in little time and slept well that night and woke up early again. She then grabbed a light breakfast stopped by her own desk to see if she needed anything from it and proceeded to the computer center to work. As she arrived Celine and Pardja were close behind, they all sat at their respective terminals and unsecured them. Pardja quickly brought up the results of the program that was running the night prior. To everyone’s delight the status bar indicated complete and ready to view. The teams attention was focused on the center monitor as Pardja linked the video to it. A video of what could only be of that of a person appeared on the screen. It was of an alien possibly male with dark hair with a tan shirt and tie on. In the background was what looked like a graphical map of a land mass with smaller graphics of what looked like clouds and water particles under them and text of some sort that no one could even begin to decipher. The man seemed to be talking and pointing at the map and gesturing across it, as the video played the scene changed to five graphics of what appeared to be a star with clouds in front of the first and second, then just the star on the rest with the same type of text underneath. The team was perplexed at what they were looking at. The scene changed again to that of another male with grey hair and a black jacket on. Pardja then pressed pause to stop the video at this point to reflect on what they had just seen. “I think we should stop at this point to ask everyone to the big screen in Kuval’s office and get everyone opinion on this.”
Lin could not agree more. “That’s a great plan Pardja; I’ll give Kuval a heads up and make an announcement to be in his office in ten minutes.” Lin then got up and informed Kuval and made the announcement. Ten minutes later all the station staff has gathered in Kuval’s office. Lin was the first to speak and answer the multitude of questions flying around the room. “I have asked you all here because my team and I have finally found a program that would decode and display the video of the signal.” Lin nodded at Kuval and the screen on his office wall came alive and played for everyone it stopped at the same point as before and Lin gave her opinion. “It looks as if this male person is describing the map behind him and indicating the text displayed in various regions of the map. Also as you saw the scene changed to a display of solar graphics with clouds and text under the five depictions. Pardja and I discussed this on the way here and have concluded that this person is discussing this planets weather patterns. What we are unsure of is weather this is a prediction of coming events or past tense. We are pretty sure it’s a prediction and is an information type of announcement, much like our daily weather announcements on Amaria. Then the scene moved to that of a second announcer which is where we stopped the recording and came to show everyone what we have found. Any questions so far?” Lin asked as she took a moment to breathe.
“Can we see the rest of the recording Lin?” Ardin asked as he walked in with three new team members with wide eyes and jaw’s on the floor.
“Your back, that’s great.” She then looked over at the three new people standing in the door way of Kuval’s office. “Welcome to our team.” She then walked over to the first and introduced herself. “Hi I’m Linaria, but you can call me Lin, I’m the team leader of this project.” She said to the balding anthropologist with thick glassed on his face. He shook her outstretched in thanks.
“I’m Dr. Surmat; I would like to thank you for choosing me for such an important project. I was sure this was a joke until Ardin assured us on our trip here.” Surmat said then let go of Lin’s hand. She scooted over to the next new victim and offered a hand to her.
“Welcome to Manara Space Station.”
“Thank you; I’m Dr. Gilia, one of the linguists.” Gilia a short round woman said with a smile shaking Lin’s hand gracefully. Lin scooted down one more time to the last new victim.
“Glad to have you part of our team.” Lin said gratuitously to the last.
“Thanks, I’m Dr. Lumar; I can’t tell you how much this assignment means to me. Thank you all for the opportunity to serve ASI.” Lumar nodded at all that were gathered. “This is quite a welcome, to see such a thing is extraordinary.” Lumar indicated to the paused video on the screen. Lin then stepped back and nudged Kuval to say something.
“Yes welcome all of you to the Amarian Space Institute’s Space Station Manara.” Kuval said to them all then began to introduce the rest of the team, and brought Ardin and the new staff members up to dated as of their progress. It took about an hour then Kuval asked for everyone’s attention. “Now that all the pleasantries are done and you have all been briefed of our progress, with no future ado, here’s the video from the start.” Kuval pressed start on the remote and the video played again from the beginning. As the video past the point where everyone had seen it before the announcer was indicating an inset video above his head. Everyone sat in silence as they were taking in what was showing before them. Kuval pressed a button to pause the video when the inset screen stopped and addressed the group. “Any thoughts about what we just saw?” Kuval asked the group.
“It looks as if the announcer is describing some sort of structural fire that was showing in the inset video to the viewers watching.” Dr. Lumar gave his opinion. “This must be like our evening news programs back on Amaria.”
“I agree, he’s obviously informing the viewers of what is going on and with the other announcer giving weather forecasts would make a lot of sense.” Lin gave her point of view.
Everyone was soon agreeing with Lumar and Lin and the room erupted in more questions to answer. Dr Gilia and Dr. Lumar were discussing the audio for a few minutes. Dr Surmat then spoke up. “I’ve been quite so far, as I was considering a few things I could discern from the video, the species is very close to that of an Amarian, the first has a skin pigmentation close to ours which means their blood is based on iron like ours. The hair and eye coloring are pretty close as well, and upper body build is about the same, it looks like the two that we saw share the same genders but like us have different builds. We can’t determine the exact height of the male because it appears they are sitting. It appears they have five fingers on each hand like us. The man in the second scene had a finger adornment which what meaning it has can’t be determined. As you can tell I am quite please at this discovery and paid close attention to the details. I will study it in closer detail later.” More questions were raised as Lumar finished his assessment. Then Lin broke the chattering.
“I think we should all consider studying each frame closely for clues to the language, and see if we can get more out of the video. Let’s finish watching what we have, there approximately 30 more seconds left to play.” Lin then nodded at Kuval.
“Yes that’s a good idea, it will most likely reveal more questions but it might answer a few as well.” Kuval stated to the staff, everyone got quiet and watched the last 30 seconds. On the screen the video played again and the play back split in two, on the left was a black background with white text scrolling up from the bottom, on the right was a small video playing of different scenes of several types. When the picture changed again the audio volume increased and the video changed to that of a male figure sitting in front of what looked like a large viewing screen that had its own video in it. He had a cylindrical metal container in his hand that he brought up to his lips and brown liquid flowed into his mouth. The expression on his face changed to one that emulated refreshment. And that’s when the video ended.
“Well that was interesting, that man must have been thirsty or maybe he was just showing that he liked the liquid to the viewers, just like we do here with Lindinberry juice.” Lin extrapolated her thoughts.
“The written text at the lift side of the screen seems to be organized and in a clear type set. It might assist us in translating this language; it will give us something to work with.” Dr. Gilia explained. “Dr. Lumar will need some space to work and few interruptions for a few days.”
“That’s not a problem; we will set you up with a couple of work stations later in the afternoon, Ardin will you see to their needs.”
“Of course, this way please. Ardin led them out of the office to an empty cubical next to the computer center. Kuval assured them. “For the rest of you I would like everyone to get back to working on the signal and see if there is more. Lin if you would stay behind a second.” Everyone left Kuval’s office and went back to work. Lin remained as requested. “Lin my dear, this proves life on another planet, we are all going to be famous. I would like you to be the face that announces this to the masses. I’ve already discussed this with Sural and he agrees this was your discovery after all.” Kuval asked her to be the planets newest celebrity in a roundabout way.
“Of course Kuval, I’ll do my best, when do you figure it would be a good time to announce this.” Lin asked wondering if were too soon.
“Sural will return to the station in one week with journalist and a camera person. We will prepare them and then announce at the end of next week.”
“Ok sir, I will prepare a speech for the occasion, Is it ok if I get help from the linguists?”
“It’s your team, use them as you see fit.” Kuval reminded her of her position.
“Thank you Kuval, I guess I need to get back to work.”
“I won’t keep you then, off you go.”
Lin left Kuval’s office and went back to her desk and worked on a schedule for herself for the upcoming week, she needed time for both the video recording and her speech she now had to write. ‘I’ll ask Lumar or Gilia for help when I check on them later’ Lin thought to herself, then went back to work on her schedule. After finding time for both tasks she got up and went down to where Gilia and Lumar had been given space. Inside on the table were two computer terminals that were linked to the computer servers in the next room. Gilia and Lumar appeared to be hard at work and were unaware of her entrance into the sparse room. She paused to watch for a minute then asked how they were. “Sorry to bother you, I just wanted to check on you and see if you needed anything?”
“Oh hi Lin, no Ardin got us everything we needed so far, be sure and thank him for us.” Gilia answered with a generous smile.
“Ok, if you need anything more, just tell Ardin or me. Oh and on another topic, if either of you has time I could use some advice on a speech I have to write for the announcement to the people in one weeks time.
“Um sure, that would be a great pleasure for me, I would be honored to help you Lin, just let me get some headway here and I’ll get with you after the diner meeting.” Gilia offered her help without reservation.
“Thanks Gilia I really appreciate the offer of help. I know we are all busy with this work, but as this team has already proven it’s a team that works well together.” Lin thanked her then left them to their work. She felt relieved that she would have help with the speech.
Lin then went back to work with Pardja, Celine and the rest of the video team for the rest of the day. Soon everyone was again gathered in the dining hall for the evening meal and sharing of each team discoveries. Kuval stood and welcomed everyone to the tables and thanked Emil and Amil for the great feast sitting in front of them. “May I have your attention please, I would like to personally thank all of you for your exemplary hard work today, and the discoveries have been tremendous and breathtaking. I can’t express how happy with all of you and especially Lin for heading up this great team of individuals.” He raised his glass in honor of all. “I toast you all and may our team preserver throughout; and the best is yet to come.” Kuval sat back down and then everyone began to eat and talk about their day’s events. The biggest discussion had been that of Niara and Athia they had the best news so far other than the video being played to the end. Niara was their spokes person.
“We have listened to the full audio of the first recording and found structure in what is being spoken. We forwarded are results to Gilia and Lumar fist thing this morning, well I think they should be the ones to announce what we have., Gilia, Lumar you have the floor.” Gilia and Lumar stood with huge smiles and the look of relief on their faces.
Gilia thanked Niara for the opportunity to speak. “Thank you Niara, well as Niara told you she sent Lumar and me the recording of the first signal, and comparing that to the text and audio of the video signal Lumar and I have been able to translate a few key sentences from the first and the entire second recording.” Gilia then let Lumar take over from her.
“What we have so far from the two recordings, the first is quite remarkable and answers a few lingering questions, one of which is how advanced is this civilization and will they be able to understand us. Yes the will and quite frankly pretty easily if we decide to respond at some point. Here is what we have.” Lumar paused for everyone to settle from the excitement and read from the paper he had folded in the top pocket of the jumpsuit he was wearing. “Discovery, Huston, what is your current roll rate? That was the first part now here is the second. Huston, Discovery, our roll rate is zero point five degrees starboard. That’s was the second part and now for the last. Discovery, Huston roll rate zero point five confirmed, we advise re-entry at 1830 Zulu. The rest of the signal was degraded too far to get more, but does answer a lot of questions. This portion indicates transmissions between a ground controller and a space varying vessel possibly in orbit of this planet and is evidence of our first question that yes they are technologically advanced.” Lumar paused to let this new information sink in then began again. “The second signal has even more information to work with; the fact that we had text and hand gesturing also aided us on translating this language as far as we have and is a great breakthrough in further translations to come. I will now turn this back over to Gilia for the next translation.”
“Thank you Lumar, I know each of you are probably wonder how we got this done so fast, all I can say is we got lucky and found a common root in the language structure, and as Lumar suggested, with the addition of the elements in the video assisted us in the initial translation. What we got from the video confirms earlier opinions, it’s from what this planet calls a news hour and we were looking at the reporter as he was called, give a weather forecast for the next five days and then switched to another reporter and he described a structure fire that had been three peoples home and was started by an electrical surge. The news hour ends with credits of names to those associated with the broadcast and then switches to an advertisement for a liquid drink of some sort.” Niara then sat back down and Lin and Kuval stood, Kuval smiled at Lin and indicated she could go first and sat back down.
“That was impressive, we now have more to work with, and we know that this species have advanced technology but about a hundred years behind Amaria, and it seems like us they inform the populous of changing situations and broadcast them as we do. No I suggest we finish our dinners and discuss what we should do next.” Lin sat down and Kuval stood up.
“Thank you Niara, Athia that was very informative, as to what’s next. ASI mandate is very clear any information, communication or signal of any sort that proves without a doubt alien life is to be reported to the Chancellor one the discovery is confirmed and evaluated. I will call Sural tonight and let him know of our progress. I once again congratulate you all for your hard work. Lin your team was come together nicely and I have been able to just run the station. That’s all for tonight, enjoy the rest of your meal and have a great night.” Manara space station was quite that night as everyone slept well after a long day of work.
Back on Amaria Chancellor Hemis an aging black haired man was having a hard time digesting what Sural had told him tonight. He was so astonished and pleased he told Sural to take him and a broadcast crew to the station the next day. He also requested for Sural to keep his visit secret as he wanted to surprise the crew of the space station.
Just a short story I needed to write.
Birthday List
By Sara D.
“Andy it’s time to wake up” mom yelled through my locked door.
“I’m up, I’m up” I said sitting up stretching my arms above my head. I wiped the sleep from my eyes as I opened my door and walked into mom at the bathroom.
“Don’t doddle I want to get your school clothes shopping done so hurry it up” mom said as she swatted my but as I went into the bathroom to shower.
I was quickly done in the shower and dressed to go with mom for my ‘back to school’ shopping’ ugh. It’s too soon I grumbled to myself as mom drove us to the mall.
Mom parked just outside of JC Penny, and like every time before we had to walk past the girls section to get to the boys and men’s sections. As was now just big enough at 5’2” to fit into both boys large and men’s small we would most likely be shopping in both sections.
I let an audible sigh as I tried not to look at all those lovely clothes hanging on the racks. “Huh.”
“I know you don’t like shopping honey, but you need new clothes, you are starting high school after all.” She said with a smile.
I thought to myself ‘I just hate shopping in the wrong section’ but I schlepped along and got new clothes for the ninth grade.
Once our shopping and my terror of having to pass by girls clothes in each store it became clear to me what I had wanted, no needed I needed girl’s clothes. I would never openly admit that to my parents in a million years, they would kill me.
So with a heavy heart I helped mom load my new wears into the back of the car and we headed home.
As we pulled into the driveway mom asked me “Andy I want you to make a list for your 14th birthday for me. I know it’s still a month away but now that we’ve got the school clothes you need you can make a list of what you really want for your b-day.”
‘What I really want’ I thought to myself Hmm... “Ok” I simply answered.
After I had all the new clothes stripped of their tags and put away I logged into Face book to see what all my friends were up to. It seems all my friends’ parents; mostly mothers had the same idea.
Shawn wrote: Don’t you hate school shopping; I mean WTF is with new clothes every year.
Tim commented back: I know I hate that too. I just wish my mom would let me be. She is always excited about shopping and I shudder every time she takes me.
So I commented too. Andy: I know what you guys mean, ugh. IDK what I wear just as long as it fits. Now she wants me to make a list of what I want for my b-day. Mothers are so needy.
We went back and forth for a while in chat and then decided we would use our last few weeks of summer left to goof of as much as possible. The hills just outside our subdivision of houses provided us with entertainment for hours. On previous visits Tim, Shawn and I made jumps, turns and mud holes for our fun. So that afternoon we met at the park and rode our bike for the rest of the day.
Once we were done and I had put my bike back into the garage I went back into my room and played around for a bit. After about an hour I was interrupted by my dad yelling at me that dinner was ready.
“Be down in a sec. dad” I answered back.
“How was your day?” Dad asked us both.
“OK, I guess” I said quietly.
“I heard about your shopping trip with mom, I know you had fun with here didn’t you?” Dad said with a laugh, knowing full well I hated it.
“Oh Richard stop teasing him, you know he doesn’t like shopping with me.” Mom scolded him playfully.
“I know Mary, I’m sorry Andy.” Dad looked at me a smiled; I knew he was just hounding me for a laugh; he and I shared the same sense of humor. “Mom also tells me you’re going to make a birthday list.” He continued his ribbing. “Make sure you put what you really want.” He said in a serious tone. “You’ve done well in school and around the house, don’t ask for anything too over the top but ask for it if you want it.” He said with a smile and continued.
After helping dad with cleaning the kitchen and dishes I went back to my room and played on the computer some more. While I waited for the game to load I thought about the list, so I opened up a word document and thought ‘what the hell’ and began typing.
I started typing.
Andy’s Birthday List
Mom and dad this list is what I really want for my birthday. I am being totally serious and truthful. Please don’t be mad at me, this is who I wish to be.
I would love to come home one day and find my boy’s underwear replaced with the prettiest girls panties.
I would love to find that my shorts had been replaced by skirts and girly shorts.
I would love to find a new bikini and one piece swim suit waiting for me and our pool.
I would love to open up presents containing my own make-up and jewelry.
I would love for mom to really take me shopping and get a few dresses, and at least one that was beautiful.
I would love to open an envelope and find a gift certificate for a manicure and a pedicure.
I would love to call you mommy and daddy, and you to call me Andrea or Andie for short.
So I finished up the list and printed it out. I gave out a chuckle as I read what I had printed. Who am I kidding; I thought as I crumpled it up and threw it away in the garbage can in my room.
The next morning I was again rushed awake to help my dad clean up after a water leak at my grandmother’s house. When we returned home after a long day we all sat and ate dinner while watching television. As I brought the first bite of chicken to my mouth my mom spoke.
“I found your birthday list today Andy” she said looking at me for a reaction.
“That’s good” dad simply said.
“Are you sure this list is exactly what you want?” She asked smiling.
I turned bright red and I wished the floor would open up and swallow me and take me away. Mom continued to stare at me for an answer. I swallowed hard, found the courage.
“Yes it is mom” cringing from the beating I was to get but did not.
“Ok, I’ll see what you and our father can come up with.” She said simply as she handed the list over to dad.
Dad just read the list to himself for a few minutes then asked. “Is this list for real son?”
“Yes dad” I simply replied.
“Ok then, now let’s go clean up the kitchen for mom.”
I was walking on egg shells the rest of the night, was she being serious. I thought about that list all while helping dad with the dishes again. I looked at him for some sort of reaction to the list; all I got was a friendly smile. Once we were done with the dishes and I put up the towel from drying them dad looked at me then gave me a hug.
“No matter what Andy, your mom and I love you.”
“I love you to daddy.” I answered testing the waters of the list.
“Now off to bed with you,” he said releasing the hug “Night.”
“Good night dad.” I said as I headed to my room.
I ran into mom in the hallway and she stopped me for a minute.
“Just a sec Andy,” she said holding the list out “what are your favorite colors?”
I thought about is for a second “Peach, purple, blue, red, pink, yellow” I answered; “anything pretty.”
“Ok, you’re sure about this, there’s no turning back once we start down this road. You need to understand that.” She said giving me a hug.
“I understand perfectly mother, I need to do this I need to find out why I want the things on that list.” I answered truthfully.
“Ok honey, get some sleep.” Nothing else was said and I undressed and went to bed.
The next morning I woke up feeling that last night was just a dream. I got myself dressed and ready for the day. As I sat with my parents eating Sunday brunch nothing was said of the past evening. It must have been a dream I reassured myself.
Andy sat staring back and forth at his parents trying to figure things out but kept quite through brunch. He was certain that his mom and dad understanding about his birthday list had to have been a dream, all be it a good one.
“Andy I want you and me to go shopping for another pair of shoes for school, you need a good pair of Gym shoes” mom said while clearing her dishes from the table.
“Ok mom” I sighed.
I cleaned up my dishes and disappeared into my room and flung myself on my bed. ‘It was a dream’ I thought and looked into the waste basket beside my computer desk and found the paper I had crumpled up just as I had left it, bummer.
I logged onto Facebook and looked at the latest posts from Tim and Shawn, noting new from them. I fiddled around on eBay doing a little “shopping” and began to think about all the possibilities and what if’s. Who was I kidding?
“Andy! Time to go” mom bellowed.
We arrived at the mall again and mom and I when threw Penny’s again. Look at all those clothes I thought as I pretended to briskly walk by. Before we got through the women’s section to get to shoes mom stopped looking like she spotted something.
Mom made her way to a rack of shirts and chose a few that looked pretty.
“I just need a few tops for work, I’ll only be a moment” She said as she took the shirts to the fitting room. “Just wait out here for me.”
I looked around and could not hold back the possibilities any longer. I had to touch the material of the clothes that were surrounding me now. I strolled over to the edge of the junior section as I knew mom would take longer than promised. I found a rack of skinny jeans and just fell in love with them. On a rack near them were some nice shirts that I liked as well. I wandered what size I might be as I fantasized about trying them on. I then saw it, only a few racks away, the most beautiful dress I ever saw.
I quickly went over to the rack and looked at the dress, a short sleeve tunic dress that was blue and white and looked to be just above the knee. I had to look at it further and I pulled it from the rack and held it up to my body. My eyes were closed with fascination as I opened my eyes and looked at myself in a mirror. I had to have this dress; if nothing else I had to at least try it on, but how. I turned from the mirror and just savored the dream a bit more before returning the dress to the rack.
“I have to have this dress” I said in a whisper.
I turned around with the dress one more time before hanging it up and pushed right into my mom who was now standing behind me.
Author’s Note: I am back from a long hiatus, please forgive my absence. I will attempt to finish this and The house fire now that my muse is back.
These are the choices I have made over the years, I hope you enjoy my stories of memory and experiences of the past.
Chapter 1
I have made a choice, not sure if it was the correct one, but here we are day two of my decision to see what happens.
A long time ago when I was seven, I realized that I had a strong attraction to girls’ clothes. My first memory was wearing my sisters’ panties under my pajamas. My act of borrowing her clothes grew as I got older and began to keep clothes that my sister no longer wore and hid them my closet. The clothes that got me excited most were her leotards and swimsuits. More than anything once piece swimsuits were the biggest draw to wearing women’s things.
My cross dressing grew stronger as I approached my teen years, at 12 I was regularly wearing panties to school without getting caught. On a few cold days while wearing a jacket or sweater I wore a bra to school from time to time but my dressing up was always in private.
The year of my 13th birthday was the biggest step in my dressing, I was offered the chance to dress in my sister’s cheerleader outfit for Halloween, I resisted at first, but my mom talked me into it. On Halloween my first time out fully dressed in a white and red skirt, top and bright red underpants. My mom had insisted I wear shorts under the skirt, but more than anything I wanted to wear my red satin panties I had bought just for the occasion. So, once I was dressed and make up was complete, I went to my room and took off my shorts and put the panties on then slid the shorts back on. Nobody expected anything and I left the house to meet up with my friends who all lived on the same street. My first choice made that day was to lose the shorts and stash them behind the trashcan on the side of the house. What a great feeling it was on that cool October night to walk around in a skirt and panties with everyone going along with how I was dressed and how good I looked.
When I returned home after a wonderful night of candy hording, I slipped into the shorts I had stashed and went back into my house without anyone knowing. It was a glorious night to say the least. I was tired and my parents were getting ready for bed and told me to get cleaned up. I entered the bathroom gazing into the mirror of the bathroom and enjoying how I looked, I jumped into the shower after my costume off, making sure to keep “my” panties hidden. Once I took a shower cleaning off all the makeup I went to bed.
I remember this day still 38 years later.
This was the first of many choices I’ve made over the years
To Be Continued...
Part 2
I have made a choice, not sure if it was the correct one, but here we with another of my choices, lets see what happens.
Weeks after my wonderful night on Halloween I soon turned 13, I was lucky to receive cash for my birthday from my parents and grandmother. I had a wallet full of $40 dollars burning a hole in my pocket.
Of course, my mom suggested I put it into my savings account. I had opened one up at a local back and had about $200 saved up. But me being 13, I wanted to spend it. We ended up compromising and I put $20 into my savings account.
So, the Saturday after my birthday I rode my bike to the local mall and went to Montgomery Wards to shop around. Back then they were the cheaper version of a Sears/Kohl's. Any ways they always had sales and it was my favorite place to browse. It being fall their selection was more geared toward cold weather. I browsed around until I found the clearance racks in the junior’s section. To my luck I found some one-piece swimwear on the racks and got excited.
I could not believe my luck and started to run my fingers along the gusset to get a feel of the material. It was luxurious feeling that material, I knew immediately I wanted this suit. It was a pink tank suit made by Speedo. I must have been lost in thought because I was startled when a sales lady tapped my on the shoulder to get my attention. I got scared and my heart was in my throat as I turned to the sales lady behind me.
“It’s OK, if you would like you can try that on in the fitting room.” She said and pointed over to the fitting rooms.
I was frozen in place and suddenly lost the ability to speak and mumbled something incoherent. She just grabbed the swimsuit off the rack and gently guided me to the fitting rooms. She ushered me in and closed the door. “Take all the time you need.” She quietly said.
I just stood there in that small space wondering what the hell just happened. I’ve been giving permission to try on the most beautiful swimsuit I’ve ever encountered. What to do, is all I could think about. I then ever so quietly opened the door to the fitting room and looked around. No one around, the lady must have given me some space or was helping someone else.
Now the choice, my 13-year-old then dropped that swimsuit on the floor and ran out of that store as quickly as I could, unlocked my bike and peddled as fast as I could towards home still with that $20 dollars in my wallet.
Looking back to then 1983 I could have made a different choice but was stuck with it. More choices are to come.
You know the usual rules, you should not be here unless your 18. Go away otherwise, because if you don’t, well someone might find out about your little problem and confront you. Maybe you’ll get what you have always wished for. You know what you want, to be girl, or dress like one or maybe get that cute pink satin dress with white tights and Mary Jane’s.
Unfortunately this story is a product of my imagination and not true in any way shape or form. I have taken parts of my own life to throw in a bit here and there. I hope you enjoy this story as much as I did writing it. This story was graciously edited by Elen. Coming very soon, My Life in a Dress, part II. Comments are always welcome. Email me at [email protected]. Flames will be ignored and purposely deleted on receipt.
Prolog:
I have a problem and I need to tell someone. So here you are dear reader, I need to use you to pour my heart out and I’ll use your shoulder to cry on metaphorically. I guess I should start with who I am. Well my name is Mathew. I’m 14 years old and a skinny 5’3”, dirty blond hair, and hazel eyes. I am your average boy, and I like all boy stuff, I’m doing great in school, have plenty of friends, and I am not bullied at school. I also have a girlfriend Karen; she’s a gorgeous brunette with emerald eyes, and is 5’2”. I share my time with her with my best friend Josh who is also 14. He is 5’5” with brown hair and green eyes. All three of us hang out together all of the time. I don’t mind having a third wheel and neither does Karen. So what’s the problem you ask? I have good grades, a girlfriend and I’ve known her since we were nine and best friends since we were in diapers. Well I guess that’s why I am here, to tell you all about it. My problem is that I’ve started to have feelings for Josh. Don’t ask me why, but they’ve become stronger over the last year and even stronger after what has happened. I can’t believe that this could have happened to me. Not Matt. I can’t be gay, bi or whatever. I mean I have always been in love with Karen. We’ve done things together I would never do with Josh. Josh and I have been best friends since we could crawl but you should know best friend and girlfriend relationships, well they’re different. For me, it’s much different than you could possibly imagine. Well, I guess since you got this story off of Big Closet, you probably know what the gist of the story is going to be about. Don’t you girls? I guess I shouldn’t make you, dear reader, wait any longer. Yes of course I am a cross dresser. You should know that by now at least. And I thought all you authors and fans were smarter than that. Boy, what was I thinking? You don’t care do you? Why should you? You don’t even know me. I’m just some guy out in nowhere land typing a story for your enjoyment.
Wait; please don’t go I was just trying to be funny. I’m sorry, forgive me. Ok, thank you for continuing. I have a few acknowledgments to make first. They’re for a few of my favorite authors out there. Why you ask again? Because this is my story and I can, that’s why. If your story is listed here, I thank you so very much. Your stories helped me to find who I am and what I want.
Show Me The Money: By Arecee - Please don’t stop writing this story.
The first week of my life/the second week: By Amanda Louise - You left me hanging at the second week.
Standing Up to Life by: Tiffany Shar — You too girl, please finish.
I love you guys.
AND NOW:
Matt’s Dilemma
By:
Sara D.
Ok, so I left you hanging at my problem. I love two people, and they are both my friends, one’s a boy and the other is a girl. I know I have feelings for both of them. I get that butterfly feeling in the pit of my stomach every time I am with them. I know it’s not just one or the other. How you ask? Well, I get that feeling whether I’m with Karen alone or Josh alone. Hence, my problem. Do I tell them how I feel? Karen knows how I feel. God, I must tell her ten times a day that I truly do love her. But after what happened today, I am pretty sure Josh knows how I feel. Crap, I just about jumped him while we were in his room earlier. I’m not 100% sure because I ran home, threw myself on my bed, and started to cry. I haven’t cried for years. What the hell is wrong with me? I need to talk to someone. Maybe my Mom. But that’s not likely to happen. I don’t think I’m ready for that discussion with her yet. I mean she’d understand about my feelings, I’m sure. But, how the hell do I talk to her about my feelings? It would be too awkward.
I could call Karen and explain things to her. We already share a pretty big secret already anyway. Just to bring you up to date I’ll tell you. IT’S ALL KARENS FAULT! Well sort of. I never really complained at any point while this occurred. I guess it all started when Karen moved in next door. Josh and I were both nine. We were playing outside with our bikes when an angel came out of the back of a moving van we had watched drive up an hour ago. We were loitering around the truck for about 15 minutes to see who was moving in. I immediately fell for this girl. I should have put my bike down on the sidewalk next to the grass separating our yard from hers, and do the gentlemanly thing. Introduce myself and offer to help her with a box. Of course, I didn’t do that. I was nine. Both Josh and I were too nervous to talk to her and rode off on our bikes to the park. Sorry, I’m a boy, that’s what we do. I was never feminine at this point in my life. I just knew I liked girl’s clothes. It really didn’t start to happen until the day after they had moved in and came over to meet us. At our front door were her mother Janet and her father Lance. Standing behind them was that angel again. She had on a gorgeous pink dress that came to her knees with pink and white tennis shoes on. I couldn’t help but stare at her. I was wishing I could wear what she had on. I was ignoring her parents. They were adults, so I could care less what they were talking about. I guess I was staring too long because that little angel that was standing there gave me a funny look and stuck her tongue out at me. Oh, it’s on now girly. What else could I do? You’d think I do the adult thing and turn the other cheek. Nope not even close. I did what all nine year old boys would do. I stuck my tongue out right back at her, with a little more emphasis for good measure. I then felt a sharp pain in the back of my head where my mom had just smacked me.
“Mathew Drayson. That’s not the right way to introduce yourself. You apologize right now mister, then go to your room and think about what you did.”
“I’m sorry.” I didn’t even know her name yet and she had already gotten me in trouble. My Mom smacked me on the butt as I walked up the stairs to my room.
“Ouch!” I yelled in surprise, trying to win sympathy from anyone in the room. I didn’t get it, but it really didn’t hurt either.
I sulked in my room for hours it seemed. I did what my Mom asked and thought what I had done. Yeah right. What I thought about was how I could get back at that little minx.
Mom came up to my room a little later and asked if I had thought about what I had done. “Mathew, did you think about what you did? You know it’s not nice to treat people that way. Especially the ones you just met.”
“Yes Mom. I’m sorry but that girl started it.” I said, shifting blame to her. It was her fault anyway, wasn’t it?
“Don’t put fault on that girl. Her name is Karen, by the way. You need to accept responsibility for your actions young man.” Mom said sternly as she sat on my bed next to me.
I thought about it for a second and felt sorry for making my Mom mad. “I’m sorry Mom, but she did stick her tongue out at me first.” I said again as I tried to get out of trouble.
“I don’t care what Karen did, you need to learn how to be a gentleman, and not do things like that to girls.” I thought she was mad before, but now she had turned red and was fuming. Now I’m in trouble. How do I get out of this one? I already said sorry twice, now what do I do.
“I expect you to act better Matt. No television for you tonight. Now get ready for bed.” She said finally and closed the door hard as she left me to myself. I was now feeling pretty lousy. I didn’t mean to piss her off and now I don’t get to watch TV. Oh well, I guess I’ll read a book. You guessed it. This is where I learned to love reading and my grades started to go up. I grabbed a book off of the shelf. It was called “Sphere”. Yes, I know they made a movie about it. But the book was great. My love for science fiction and fantasy books just grew from this first book. I must have read for hours because when I finally set it down it was almost midnight, and I had school in the morning.
I woke the next day tired. But I think I had a new outlook that morning. I don’t know. Maybe it was my Mom yelling at me or maybe it was the book. Who knows, I’ll blame it on Mom for now I guess. As I walked out to the corner, I met up with Josh. We hurried off to school as we were running late. We had gotten probably 15 feet from our houses when we could hear the unwelcome screech of a female voice.
“Wait up guys, let me walk with you.” My little angel with horns on her head said.
We both ignored her and walked a little faster to try and stay ahead of her. To no avail I might add. She actually skipped up to us in order to catch up. I mean such a girl thing to do, huh? Then the little thing practically sang as she looked right at me and spoke. “I’m sorry for getting you in trouble yesterday. It’s entirely my fault.”
What, an apology? This was unexpected. Who was I to argue with the angel that was looking at me with that cute smile and long luxurious hair in a pony tail? She had on another cute dress. It was purple with flowers on the bodice. She was wearing white tights and the same shoes as the day before. God, how I wish I could borrow those clothes, for just ten minutes. That’s all I would need.
She continued in her musical voice. “So we can get together at my house after school ok?”
Boy I was just head over heels for this girl already. I’m in big trouble. Oh, did I mention I missed everything else she just said? I must be under some sort of spell. Now I’ll have to ask her what she said.
“I’m sorry, what did you say before?” I asked politely.
“I said I would make it up to you with some cookies and milk at my house, as a peace offering. My Mom and I baked them last night. My Mom said something about the smell of fresh cookies making a new house smell like home.”
“Um, ok after school then.” Ending what I was hoping was the last of this conversation and I would have it quiet for the last two blocks it took to get to school. Boy was I wrong. I don’t think she even stopped talking to breathe. I thought this would end as we reached school and we would go our separate ways. I was in the 4th grade and I hoped she was still in 3rd grade. Nope, not a chance. She sat next to me on the right side while Josh took his usual seat to the left. We were the second row back in case you were wondering. I sighed at the thought of sitting next to her for the next month. School was ending soon for the summer holidays. I couldn’t wait. So much goofing off to do and little time to do it. My daydreaming of summer ended with our teacher taking roll and introducing the new girl.
“Everyone this is Karen Somers. She’s new here. I expect you all to treat her with respect and help her get around for the next few days.” Mrs. Thompson looked right at me with that statement.
Why me? I thought. I mean she’s a nice teacher and friendly. But why should I take time out of my busy day and help out that little devil? “Because she’s cute you dork.” A voice in my head told me. Now my own head was messing with me about this girl. I guess I shouldn’t argue with myself. So I swallowed my pride and agreed.
“I’ll do it Mrs. Thompson.” I answered and gave Karen an evil smile. She must have missed it because she was giggling and told me we were now friends.
“Oh goody Matt. You and I are now friends.” Karen stated as a matter of fact.
Oh goody huh? Now I have a girl telling me what to do already.
“I guess.” I answered her.
The class went on after that. I won’t bore you with what happened at school the rest of day. It was just a normal day. I did show Karen around all the hot spots and such, that’s all. Josh and I left school for home with Karen close behind. Again she skipped to catch up. I saw her come up and for some reason butterflies decided to do somersaults in my stomach as she talked to me.
“Hi Matt. We’re still on for cookies and milk, right?” She said with a tone of voice that said I would be there.
“I have to ask my Mom first.” I told her, I prayed my Mom wouldn’t let me go over. Come on I was still nine and really only wanted to play with Josh.
“Ok, I’ll have them ready for you when you come over.” Karen said. She was sure I would come over.
I tried to walk the rest of the way home in silence but as you might have guessed, Josh and I learned everything from her last school; friends, pets and, everything leading up to the move to next to me. For some reason, I was listening to every word she was saying. There was that spell she had me under again. I was daydreaming as I imagined I was the one in that purple dress skipping along the sidewalk home. We finally separated when Karen skipped up to her front door and told me she would see me in a few minutes.
“Don’t be long Matt, I’ll be waiting.” She said as her walked into the open door then closed behind her.
Josh was now laughing hard as the door closed.
“What’s so funny?” I asked my best friend.
“You and your new girlfriend, that’s what.” He said holding back his laughter.
“She is not my girlfriend Josh, that’s not funny.” I pleaded in my defense. “I never said that she was.”
“Well I think you will be very shortly. I saw how you were looking at her. You’re in love my friend.” Josh said as he punched me on my shoulder and ran off to his house with laughter.
Oh joy. Now my best friend is plotting against me with this girl. I then realized I was now skipping up the walk to my front door. What the hell was that about? I stopped myself and looked around to make sure no one saw me. As I entered my house my Mom greeted me with even more scheming against me.
“Matt, Karen’s mom called and told me that you wanted to go over and spend time with Karen. I think it’s a great idea for you to meet someone new. You go ahead and go over. Remember to behave and don’t forget to thank Mrs. Somers. ”
“Yes mom.” I put my school bag down and turned around down the walk of death to Karen’s house.
I knocked on the red front door and awaited my fate. My butterflies were doing a circus act now. I could not get the vision of that girl out of my head. And I did not want my feelings to be known about how I felt about her and her clothes. The door then flew open and my little angel was there to greet me.
“Matt! You’re here, come in.” She said with excitement and led me to the kitchen. As I walked in her mom greeted me.
“Nice to see you again, Matt. How was school?” Karen’s mom asked. And even before I could answer, once again that girl was in charge and answered for me.
“It was great mom. He showed me all around school and introduced me to his friends and everything. I like him.” She said embellishing a bit. “That’s why I invited him over for cookies; as a thank you.”
“That’s nice Karen. Thank you Matt for being nice to Karen.” Her Mom said as she placed a plate of chocolate chip cookies and two glasses of milk on the table. The cookies were fantastic. Karen and I ate the whole plate. She kept smiling at me between bites. I couldn’t help myself and I smiled back. I wasn’t forcing them. Once we had finished the cookies Karen got up grabbed my right hand and dragged me out of the kitchen.
“Let’s go. I want to show you my room.” She said dragging me down the hall to her room. I had no choice but to follow with a dumbstruck look on my face. When in Rome I guess. Her room was filled with boxes and her clothes were strewn about haphazardly. I was taking a look around to get a feeling for the room when my focus stopped and fell on what was hanging on the closet door. It’s was a gorgeous, white satin flower girl dress with lace. It looked to be about knee length, and I was stunned with its beauty and elegance. How I wanted to walk over to that dress and just touch it. I came out of my daydream by some nudging from Karen.
“Matt, are you OK? You seem to be daydreaming.” Then she looked in the direction of my gaze. “That’s a flower girl dress I wore to my aunts wedding last month. It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”
“Yes, I wish I could wear it.” Oh shit, did I just say that out loud? Now I’m in for it. The look on her face was not one of surprise or disgust as I thought it would be. It was one of understanding.
“You want to try it on?” She asked, but didn’t wait for me to answer.
She took the gorgeous dress off its wooden hanger and brought it over to me and put it up to me. My heart was beating so fast I thought it would burst from my chest. I reached out my shaking hand to touch the material of the dress. Something else unexpected started to happen. I got hard.
“What the hell?” As the satin of the dress touched the fingers of my hand, my skin tingled. “What was I doing? Was I under her spell again?”
“Here.” She said as she handed me the dress. “Take your shoes, pants and shirt off first.”
I didn’t even think. I just did as I was told and soon my clothes were on the floor. I had my arms above my head and the dress fell into place on my body as I lowered my arms.
Oh wow, I was excited now. The dress felt luxurious and I could not believe I was standing there wearing a dress for the first time. A dream of mine I had had forever and I felt as if I was going to faint with all the feelings going through my mind.
“You look pretty in that dress Matt.” She said as she stepped back to get a better look. “How does it feel?”
“Wonderful, thank you for letting me try it on.” I said.
I was now looking into her eyes and I was getting even more feelings coming to my mind. I think I fell in love with her right then and there. “You’re pretty and cute too.”
“Thank you Matt. Have you done this before?” She asked indicating the dress I was wearing.
“No, but I have been dreaming of this for a long time, thank you.” I answered then went to her and gave her a hug. Even I was surprised as I did this. She was surprised too, but receptive. Then we broke the hug. I began to worry she would tell someone my secret.
“Please don’t tell anyone.” I pleaded.
“I would never do that. Not without your permission. By the way you’re my boyfriend now.” She said sweetly.
“Um, ok. Can I do this again sometime?” I asked hesitantly.
“Of course you can, I like you dressed like this. Maybe next time I will help you dress properly.”
“Thank you, Karen.” I gave her another hug.
“You’re welcome, now get changed before my Mom catches us.”
I took the dress off and put my own clothes back on. Once I finished she again ordered me around. I must confess I was putty in her delicate hands.
“Now help me clean up and put my things away.”
“Ok.”
I won’t bore you with every experience that we had over the last five years involving my dressing. Just that we did it a lot and makeup made its début when we were twelve.
Now back to my original problem, I guess I’ll call Karen. I grabbed my cell and pressed the button to speed dial her number. It rang only once and she answered.
“Hey, Matt. What’s up my love?” She said with her usual musical voice.
“Hello my angel. Can you come over and talk?” I asked a little hesitant.
“Sure, what’s the matter honey?” She asked with concern.
“I need to talk to you about something. Can you bring something special for me? It’s been a bad day.”
“Of course baby, I’ll be right over.” She knew that when I had a bad day I would always ask for something special from her wardrobe. She knew what I liked and always brought sexy clothes and undergarments. She arrived at my house ten minutes later with her pink backpack that she always brought my special gifts in. Karen then dropped the bag and hugged me tightly.
“What’s the matter baby?” She said as she squeezed me tighter.
“God, I love you Karen.” I told her as I hesitated to tell her my feelings. “Can we go up to my room first?” She knew it meant I wanted to wear what she had brought.
“Of course, I brought you something sexy today.” Karen said with a grin. She took my hand in hers as we walked up the stairs to my room. She placed her back pack on my bed and took out what I could only describe as sexy as hell. Red satin panties, matching bra, black mini skirt and red blouse with black pantyhose and red pumps. I quickly undressed and slid the panties up my hairless legs. I’ve kept them that way since puberty started, and I pushed my hairless self between my legs and pulled the panties up tight. God I loved the feeling of satin panties. Next came the bra which I learned to fasten without problems years ago, followed by the pantyhose. I rolled them up and pulled each leg up one by one until they were situated correctly on my waist. Next was the skirt that fell to about 3 inches above my knees. And finally the red blouse and pumps were put on. The blouse was made of silk, which of course made shudder. Karen always knew how to comfort me, and this outfit did it. I looked at myself in the mirror on the back of my closet door and drooled at the teen girl staring back at me.
“Come on let’s do your make up today. It will make you feel better.”
I had never put make up on at my house because my Mom got off work around six and I liked to have it on longer. We always did at Karen’s because her Mom got home around nine, and her Dad at ten. I must have been out of my mind because I agreed.
“Ok, let’s do it. Keep an eye on the time so I can clean up before six.” She then led me into the bathroom across the hall and did her magic. She put on pink lipstick, light blue eye shadow and mascara on me. Once she was done, she announced I was beautiful. She then played with my long hair putting it in a page boy style, and I was done.
“You look beautiful Mattie. Now let’s sit and talk about what’s bothering you.”
Before I sat on the end of my bed I took another look at the cute teenage girl in the mirror then sat next to Karen. I looked at her worried face. She had the look that I felt. I mean I felt good with the clothes on and the makeup job was great, but now I had a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I guess those butterflies found their way home. I was lost in thought and mindlessly rubbing my stocking covered legs trying to find the words that I wanted to get out.
“Before I start, I just want you to know that I love you very much and that nothing could come between us. Ever since we met I’ve been in love with you Karen. The clothes, the support over these last five years has been unbelievable.” I paused to reflect and gather my thoughts for a moment.
“I love you more than anything, Mattie.” She said as her arm went around my shoulder and used my girl name. “I will always love you, even if you want to dress like this full time.”
She must have thought this is what I wanted to discuss. Our time together with me dressing has become almost a daily thing. I’ve even started wearing panties to school on occasion, when I didn’t have gym.
“So tell me. What are you thinking about?”
“It’s about Josh.” I stopped there not knowing how to get the rest out.
“What about him, has he done something?” Karen asked concerned.
“No, it’s me. It’s how I feel about him.” I started and then lost the words. Then Karen leaned over and planted a kiss on my lipstick covered lips. It was wonderful. Her kisses could cure any bad feelings I had.
“It’s ok Mattie, whatever it is we’ll work it out.” Karen comforted me and squeezed my shoulder. I then leaned into her shoulder and began to cry again. “It can’t be that bad. Can it?”
Somewhere I found the strength to stop crying and I wiped my tears with a tissue that Karen had grabbed from the night stand next to my bed. “Uh oh, no mascara, she had used the good stuff, oh well I deal with that later.” Now I started to laugh uncontrollably, and she did the same when she realized that I was holding a tear soaked tissue with no mascara on it. I felt better now than I had all day.
“Maybe these feelings for Josh will go away in time.” As long as I have Karen for support maybe this will pass. Not likely, I know how I feel and I want to act on them. It’s probably lust. I mean he is cute and sexy. Did I just think that? I’m in big trouble.
“Karen I’m having sexual feelings towards Josh, and I think he knows.” I finally spit it out after all of that.
“Oh is that all? I thought you were going to tell me you wanted to dress as a girl full time. Either way I would have been OK with it. In fact I think it’s OK if you have feelings for him. It’s kind of my fault anyway. I have taught you how to be more feminine over the years and you took to it very easily. I mean look at you. You’re a beautiful girl.”
“I am aren’t I? So you’re OK with me having feelings for Josh?” I asked still a little hesitant.
“Sure. And if you want to experiment with him, I’m OK with that too.”
“Really, you would be OK if I wanted to do stuff with him?” I asked excited and horny. I’m 14, so sue me.
“Absolutely, I have one condition though.” Karen stated with a smile. “I get to watch, and you have to be dressed as you are.”
“Um, OK. You’re sure?” I asked, getting more excited as I imagined the possibilities.
“Oh yes. I’ve wanted to see you do that for a long time. I just didn’t suggest it until I was sure you would go for it.”
“Ok, um… What about Josh? I don’t think he would be game.” I was now feeling those butterflies again. Would Josh want to get with me sexually? Not a chance, for sure.
“I wouldn’t be too sure about that.” She said as a matter of fact. “We’ve known you might be interested in him for a while, but wanted to wait for you to confirm our suspicions first. Now that you have, all you have to do is tell him.”
“You’re kidding right?”
“Nope. But it’s up to you to explain your clothes.”
“How am I going to explain all of this?
“Oh, we’ll think of something.” At that very moment our conversation ended with the realization that the front door to the house had just closed down stairs.
“Oh shit. It’s my Mom. Now what do I do?” I indicated how I was dressed.
“I guess now is a good a time as any to let her know about Mattie.” She said snickering.
“I guess you’re right, but I don’t want to give her a heart attack. Will you go talk to her in the hall first and ease her into it?” I said in almost a panic now as those butterflies were joined by a herd of elephants.
We then heard my Mom yell up the stairs for me.
“Matt! I’m home. Are you in your room? I need to talk to you about something.”
“Yeah, Mom. Just a minute. Karen is here.” I yelled back at my Mom, then looked at Karen now in a full panic.
“GO! Please help me through this.”
“Don’t worry sweetie. I’ll help you.” Karen assured me as she walked into the hall and closed the door until there was just a crack in it. I guess so I could hear them, which I did.
“Hello Mrs. Drayson.” I heard Karen say.
“I keep telling you, call me Linda. How are you Karen?” Mom asked my girlfriend.
“Sorry Linda, I keep forgetting. I’m doing great, thank you.”
“What’s Matt up to?”
“Well…we sort of need to tell you something?” I heard the nervousness in her voice. I was breathing hard with anticipation and mindlessly rubbing my legs again.
“Oh! My goodness. No.” I heard an audible inhale as my Mom was expecting something bad.
“You’re not pregnant are you?” She asked with fear in her voice.
“Absolutely not. It’s about Matt.” She squashed the first fear and brought a new one.
“He’s OK isn’t he? Is he hurt?” My mother asked with anguish.
“No, of course not. He’s fine. He just wants to show you a new outfit that he’s wearing.” I could hear the kindness in her voice. “But before you go in don’t freak out when you see him.” I then stood up and smoothed out the skirt and blouse and awaited my fate. The door to my room opened and my Mom walked in. She gasped as she saw me standing in the middle of my room in that black mini skirt, blouse, red pumps and makeup.
“Oh my” She paused as she looked me up and down. “Wow you are a very pretty girl. What’s your name, honey?”
“Mattie” I squeaked out. I then saw Karen just behind my mom for moral support.
“Well it’s about time I finally get to meet you.” Mom told me with a smile.
“What!” Both Karen and I said at the same time as we looked at each other in shock.
“Oh I’ve known for ages. I found some things of yours Karen. Then I saw Mattie wearing a bra a while back. I knew that you would come to me in time and I didn’t want to press the issue.”
I couldn’t help myself and gave my Mom a great big hug. Karen joined in for a group hug.
“You don’t care that I like to dress like a girl, Mom?” I asked just to be sure.
“Of course I don’t care. You are my son, and I love you no matter what. How you decide to dress is your business. You make a very pretty girl. I am happy that Karen has chosen to not abandon you and that you can share this with her.” Mom then turned to Karen. “How long have you known about this Karen?”
“Well um...” Now Karen was trying to get the words out. “For five years since we first met at my house for milk and cookies the day after we met.” She said quietly.
“That long? How did this start?” Mom asked both of us as she sat on the bed. Karen and I sat with her, me on the left and Karen on the right.
Both Karen and I related the story about how this all began. My Mom gave both of us a hug with either arm. “I am so happy you finally told me about this and the whole truth, It makes me proud and delighted you two are able to share this and still be a couple.” Mom said with a smile and patted my on my knee.
“I love her more than anything, Mom. I think Karen and I are sole mates.” I said smiling at Karen.
“I love you too, Mattie. Nothing could separate us.” Karen said with honesty.
“Well it seems you two have figured out your love for each other.” Mom then paused; probably trying to form what I knew was on her mind. “Um have you two um… you know… slept together?”
“Mom!” I shouted. “Sorry, I know you are worried about us. But no, we have not ‘Slept’ together.” I told her the half truth. I wasn’t ready to tell her about our time together with us and our oral pleasuring of each other.
“Is that true Karen?” She was giving Karen a questioning look that screamed ‘Don’t lie to me’.
“Sort of, we have done a few things together.” Karen was obviously more open to discussing our tirades than I was.
“Like what?” Mom asked.
Karen looked embarrassed but admitted to our giving each other oral pleasure. “Well Mattie and I have given each other oral pleasure. But that as far as it’s gone. I will admit I would like to do more with Mattie.” Her face became flush and red as she completed that statement.
“Oh, um... Well I guess I will have to get Mattie some condoms pretty soon then. Won’t I?” Mom asked looking right at me.
“I guess that would be a good preventative measure should Karen and I decide to go that far.” I finally found my voice and I sounded almost adult about the issue.
“That’s very adult of you Matt. As a boy, you need to know the responsibilities of preventing unwanted pregnancies with your girlfriend. Now this does not give you two kids permission to have sex and be for warned I will be calling your Mom about this Karen.”
“That’s OK, Linda. My Mom already knows about our activities. I tell her most everything. She’s still in the dark about his dressing in my clothes though.” Karen told my Mom.
“Oh I doubt that, I’ve had a few conversations with her as to where the panties I found came from and she knows of your secret as well. We both think it’s cute and don’t care either way Mattie. We love you both and accept you as you are.”
“Thanks Mom.” I said with tears in my eyes and hugged her tightly. And at that very moment we all realized we had company. I turned around to the door to my room and saw Josh standing there with his mouth open and a very confused look on his face.
“Um…Uh Hi. I rang the bell and when no one answered, I came to see if Matt was in the shower or something. But this is… well an unexpected find.” Josh said as he walked up to me and looked me over.
“Wow, Matt you make a pretty girl, I never thought you would look this good…sexy even.” He said at last as his eyes were jetting around taking all that I was in.
“Thanks Josh. Karen and I were just explaining this to my Mom when you walked in.” Josh was still looking at me. Man, those eyes of his were burning my sole. I could lose myself in them for days.
“Wait. What did you mean you never thought I would be this pretty?” I asked puzzled at what he had just said. Did everyone know about my cross dressing?
“Well I’ve sort of known for a while Matt, or is it something else?” He asked.
“It’s Mattie. Not much of a stretch, but that’s me as long as I dress as a girl and it’s kind of been going on for years Josh. It was high time I told someone other than Karen. Funny thing though, Karen and my Mom had the same suspicions as you probably did.”
“Just so you know Matt, I’ve known for about a month. I saw you at school one day and I could see that you were wearing panties. I saw the red when you bent over to tie your shoes.”
“Why were you looking at my ass Josh?” I said hopping for the best outcome. As I looked at his face turned bright red and finally smiled.
“Because I think it’s a nice ass.” Josh admitted and came to me and put his hand on my shoulder. My Mom’s expression changed to that of utter surprise.
“Am I missing something?” My Mom asked. All three of us kids kind of shrugged and I thought it was my responsibility to let that cat out of the bag.
“Well Mom…that’s another thing I wanted to tell you today. We just hadn’t gotten that far yet when Josh came in. What I am telling you is that I’m in love with Karen and I’m in love with Josh. I had already told Karen of my feelings for her and for Josh. She said she was OK with it and if I decided I wanted to act on them it was OK.” I left the part of her wanting to watch out. I didn’t want to freak out Mom too much in one day.
“Does that mean you are bisexual, Mattie?” Mom asked with an expression that was hard to read.
“Yeah, it does Mom. I hope you are not disappointed or hate me.” I was a little scared what her reaction would be to hearing her son was not only a cross dresser but also bisexual.
“I could never hate you Mattie. You are my child and I love you unconditionally. I’m just a little overwhelmed. Standing in front of me is a beautiful teen-aged girl that is my son and he has now admitted she has feelings for her girlfriend and his best friend. I refer to you as both because I’m not sure which you prefer. I will need a little time to adjust to my new daughter.” Mom had a small smile on her and then came closer to me. “Come here sweetie and give your Mother a hug.”
I did just that and held my Mom tightly and cried lightly into her shoulder, I then felt two more sets of arms wrap around me as Josh and Karen joined in the hug.
“We all love you Mattie, no matter what happens from this point forward.” Karen reassured her approval.
“Yeah, Mattie. Well, I guess you know, I love you, too.” Josh said quietly, probably not sure how to feel.
“You do?” I said as I broke free of the embrace and wiped the tears from my eyes.
“I just said that Matt. I do love you, very much. You are my best friend and maybe after today, even more.” He said hesitant to the reaction that might come.
“It’s OK if you want more from your relationship with Josh.” Mom said reassuring me. “I know this part of you is new to me but I will not stand in the way of whatever you three decide is right for you. And no matter which way you decide to go Matt I will support you.”
“Thanks Mom. You’re the greatest. Karen, Josh and I will talk about it more. I think a nice walk to the park would be nice and help to clear our heads.” I recommended.
“That’s a great idea Matt. I guess Josh and I will wait downstairs for you to change.” Karen said as she stood up.
I thought about that for a minute and thought, screw it. “That’s not necessary. I would like to go as I am. Now is the best time to take another big step and let Mattie out for a walk.”
“Are you sure about that Mattie? I mean you look nice and I’m sure no one would recognize you. I just want to make sure you are ready for such a big step?” Mom asked with a concerned look.
“Yeah I’m sure. I have always wanted to do that and its high time Mattie left the confines of Karen’s or my room.” I said with assurance. I really was excited to step out into the real world for the first time.”
“Ok Mattie it’s your choice. Watch out for my new daughter, you two.” Mom instructed Karen and Josh.
Karen and Josh followed me out the front door of my house and, no sooner had I stepped out into the open, those damn butterflies showed up. I froze in fear, but Karen nudged me out farther.
“You look beautiful Mattie, go ahead.”
I swallowed hard and took a few more steps. As Karen, Josh and I reached the sidewalk, we headed towards the park. This took us right in front of Josh’s house. His Mother was outside getting ready to leave. She waved at all of us and smiled at us as we walked past.
“Josh, please come over here for a second.” Josh’s Mom called to him.
“Uh oh. Now what? I guess we’ll have to explain all of this once again.”
“Sure Mom, what’s up?” Josh greeted his mother.
“Hi Mrs. Benson. How are you?” Karen said sweetly as we approached Josh’s Mom.
“Fine. Thanks Karen. Josh, who is this young lady?” Mrs. Benson asked while smiling at me.
“Hi Mrs. Benson. It’s me, Matt. But you can call me Mattie.” I thought I might as well get that out of the way. Mrs. Benson smiled even more brightly than before and I got another big surprise.
“You look nice Mattie, your Mom and I have talked about this a few times and we were wondering when Josh would introduce us to the girl next door.”
“You knew too?” I asked puzzled.
“Yes, it was the little things. I know that Josh had feelings for you for a long time. And when I found out you were into girls clothes, I had hoped you two could have a relationship.” Turning to Karen she said. “Karen I know you and Matt are boyfriend girlfriend, but I hope you understand that all I am hoping for is my son to find his true love.”
“I never told you anything Mom. How did you know? Josh asked surprised as I was.
“A Mom knows her children honey. And the way you two looked at each other over the last few years gave me clues. How do you feel about this Karen?”
“To be honest Mrs. Benson, it kind of turns me on, and I told them that I will be involved one way or another if they decide to act on their feelings.” Karen told her of our deal.
“Wow, I’m impressed with your attitude Karen. I will tell you all now, that if you act on your feelings, that all of you need to act responsibly.” Mrs. Benson commanded.
“Oh we will Mom. In fact, Mrs. Drayson insisted on the same earlier.” Josh assured her.
“So what are you three up to now anyway?” Mrs. Benson asked.
“We were just headed to the park to clear our heads and have a talk.” Karen told her.
“Ok you three, be safe.”
“We will Mrs. Benson. Today is a first for a lot of things. Like today is my first time out fully dressed as Mattie. I kind of like it. I might do this more often. Well, except for at school.” I was truly enjoying being outside, the way the skirt and pantyhose felt was fantastic. “We’ll be back in a little while.”
Karen, Josh and I continued our walk to the park. Once we arrived, we picked a table to sit at. Karen and Josh both sat on either side of me as I sat in the middle of the table’s bench. Josh put his arm around my shoulder and Karen put hers around my waist. I could get used to the attention I was getting. The only problem was that I was getting hard. I was straining against those pretty pink panties I was wearing. With all the attention along with being in the park dress, I was I was in sensory overload and needed relief soon. Karen started rubbing my tummy. This did not help my current situation, and Josh started south and put his hand on my left breast.
“I love you both, but if you don’t stop what you’re doing, I’m going to make a mess in my panties.”
“I don’t care Mattie. I’m so hot for you right now, we need to find a place to go.” Karen said putting her and up my skirt and found Mattie junior. I audibly moaned my approval.
“I can’t agree more, but where can we go?” Josh interjected.
Karen was now sliding her hand inside my panties and stroking my hardness. I turned towards Josh and smiled at him. He then leaned in and our lips met for the first time. I melted into those pert lips of his and felt his tongue slip between my lips. My senses surpassed overload into imminent danger of explosion now. I broke Josh’s incredible kiss and pulled Karen’s hand from my panties.
“Stop please you’re going to push me over the edge.” I pleaded with them both.
“You’re just so hard to resist Mattie, I love you.” Karen said and kissed me next. Oh I could definitely get used to this for sure.
“Hey, I love you to Mattie. I need to have you soon or I’m going to blow. That kiss was fantastic.” Josh said with a huge smile.
“I know I almost blew when you did that. Let’s go somewhere quick.”
“I get to watch remember.” Karen instructed. “We can go to my house; Mom and Dad won’t be home for hours.”
“Ok, let’s hurry.” I said leading the way to Karen’s. We couldn’t get there fast enough. As we entered her room, she took me into an embrace that would melt a witch’s heart. I even lifted my leg. It was so intense. Then Josh butted in.
“Hey I want some too.” He whined.
“Oh alright, I get to watch.”
“I want to watch you two also. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to see two girls make love.” Josh said with a smile of anticipation.
I could see the lust in his eyes and I am sure he could see in mine. I took him in my arms and we kissed for the second time. I was in love with the second person of my life, it was fantastic. I wanted more. I broke our kiss and slowly went to my knees. I know what I wanted now. I pulled down his pants and underwear and slid his hardening cock into my mouth. I was soon sucking him for the first time and loved it. The feeling of the hardness and the soft skin on my tongue was amazing. I pulled him out temporarily to get his hairless balls into my mouth and rolled them around with my tongue. They felt wonderful in my mouth but I missed the main prize and slipped his shaft back into my salivating mouth. It was not long when Josh let out a loud moan and I felt jets of his sperm flow into my mouth and down my throat as I swallowed all he had to offer. When he was done, his legs buckled and he sat on the floor with me never letting his cock fall from my mouth. I finished cleaning him up and let his flaccid cock fall onto his flat stomach. At the same time I heard a squeal from Karen and saw her playing with herself feverously as she came with a shudder.
“Oh my god. That was too hot to watch Mattie, I must see the encore now.” Karen said almost out of breath.
“Oh yeah Matt, that was amazing. You were great and now it’s my turn. I called you Matt because I am going to suck a boy’s dick and not a girl’s clit right now.”
“I don’t care what you call me Josh. I’m too hot to care right now, so go for it.”
Josh complied. He raised my skirt and lowered my pre-cum covered panties. He did not hesitate to put me in his mouth. He was sucking me like a pro. I was surprised that he was able to deep throat me in one shot. His mouth felt amazing and I knew I would not last long. I had Josh pumping my cock in and out of his mouth and Karen fingering herself next to me. I then shot my load down Josh’s waiting mouth without warning. I was surprised again when he willingly swallowed my gift to him. He quickly cleaned me up and did not miss a drop.
“That was so good Josh, thank you.” I said breathlessly.
“I know I loved every second of it and well definitely do that again. I love your cock Mattie.”
“I love yours too Josh, I guess it’s my turn to help out Karen?”
“You got it. Now get those pretty lips and tongue over here and finish me off.”
I immediately did what I was told and started to lick up and down her pussy. I found her clit and she then started to buck wildly. She had an orgasm in short time. I guess watching Josh and me made her hot. We all lay on her floor together as our teen bodies recovered quickly.
“That was the most incredible thing I have ever experienced. It was so hot watching you two.” Karen explained still coming down from the intensity of our play.
“It was wonderful wasn’t it?” I added. “I love both of you so much. We should get cleaned up and get home.”
“You girls need to fix your makeup before we go, unless you want to look like a couple of tarts.” Josh said laughing.
Karen and I looked at each other in the mirror. Both of our faces looked disheveled and needed fixing. Karen and I redid our makeup after washing our faces and cleaned up our hair. After we finished, we walked out to get Josh’s assurances that we looked presentable.
“Josh, how do we look?”
“Beautiful. Good enough to kiss.” Josh said with a grin.
The three of us walked out of Karen’s house and went over to mine. Mom was watching television when we all walked in.
“How was your walk to the park?” Mom asked as the three of us sat down on the couch.
We all gave each other a knowing look and I answered her. “It was good Mom. We discussed our options and came to an agreement that the three of us are now together. I now have a girlfriend AND a boyfriend.”
“I see. And did you have fun over at Karen’s?” Mom asked with a smirk. She obviously knew more than she was letting on.
“What do you mean Mom?” I asked nervously.
“I saw the three of you go into Karen’s house over an hour ago.”
“To be honest mom I had sex with Karen and Josh. It was wonderful Mom.”
“I knew something like this would happen. I am just glad it was with people you love. I expect you to be careful and use protection from now on.”
Mom talked to us about lots of things for the next half hour. Then when she finished, Josh and Karen left to go home. Mom and I were still sitting together on the couch.
“So Mattie, now that you have been out dressed like that in public, what’s next?”
“What do you mean Mom?” I asked puzzled.
“Well, are you planning on being dressed as a girl more often?”
“I guess I will. I have wanted to go out in public as Mattie, and the urge is stronger now that you and Josh both know.”
“Well it’s OK with me if you want to. However, if you decide to do it again, I would like to help you.”
“You do? That would be great Mom.” That being said, I went to my room, took a shower and changed for bed. I went to sleep knowing I had a great Mom, a beautiful girlfriend and a sexy boyfriend. I then dreamt of being at school as Mattie and being accepted.
TO BE CONTINUED
This is my first attempt at an erotic story of any type. It is my sincerest hopes that you will enjoy this story. All warnings apply; if you are under 18 go away. If you enjoyed this story please e-mail all responses to me at [email protected]. This is not your typical story about a boy who needs to or has to dress like a girl. I thought some people would like something a different. I revised this story to fix grammar and spelling errors. The content has not changes and I fully intend to continue this series. I just hope I got all of them. Hope you enjoy this story as much as I did writing it. I know it’s been a long time coming, things in my life prevented this from occurring before. My apologies for the delay in a proper re-write.
This story is copyrighted by the author and is allowing free distribution to Crystals Story Site, Fiction Mania and Big Closet. Please look for more stories from here soon.
And now!
My Life in a Dress
By Sara D:
Chapter one: Finding out who you are.
Well I guess I should start by telling you a little about myself. My name is Shawn and I am a 14 year old boy, 5 foot 5 blond hair 110 lb. and I have fare skin. I have always liked being a boy and doing boy things. I liked playing with hot wheels, trucks and riding my bike. The only difference in me from other boys my age is that I am Gay, and I have a major crush on my best friend Josh. I can't help myself. He is just beautiful. He's my age, 5 foot 6 brown hair, a smile to die for, light skin and a body that could kill.
Josh and I have been friends since the two of us where in diapers. I and as long as I can remember I have always had a crush on him. Only till recently did I realize I was falling in love with him. Because every time I look at him I felt strange and I would get hard on just looking at him. It all came to light between us l one day during lunch period while day and Josh interrupted my day dreaming and said. "Hey, Shawn are you all right man?"
"Huh, oh sorry I was just lost in thought." I said recovering from the daydream
"Ok man. If you need to talk about something I am here for you". And that's how he is. A really nice guy, one of the reasons I love him so much. But as usual I kept to myself, feeling, that if I told him the truth I would lose our friendship forever. On the other hand I would do anything to get into his pants, Hey I'm a teenager I think about sex. Allot! Ok so get off my back. Well anyway after we were finished eating we went outside to take our afternoon stroll to look for chicks as he would call it. Josh would look at girls and say how cute they were, and point out which ones he would like to go out with. I would always respond with my usual agreement even though I never cared what any of them looked like.
After our stroll we headed for Gym class. Josh and I had our lockers next to each other. No let me tell you I have seen Josh naked a few times at his house and during gym class while changing but today was different. Today while we changed for gym he took of his boxers and revealed he had a hard on. This is the first time I saw him with a boner, and there I was staring right at it. Oh my god I thought. Then with a sly grin, he says, "Ok that's it, you and me are going to talk after school." Then he left to go to class.
The entire time during gym class he would not look at me. All this time I was sweating buckets, thinking he was going to pummel me or worse. After class was over he was his good old cheery self and changed in front of me without any more words said until we started to walk out to our next class when he said. "Don't forget Shawn I want to talk about this after school". This made me worry even more. The rest of the day went really slow. Josh and I met after school and started to walk home. He was quite at first but then he started to speak.
"So Shawn, tell me what's up with you?"
"I don't know what you are talking about" I responded hoping he would drop it.
"Come on Shawn, I'm still your best friend, just tell me the truth."
"The truth about what?" I was still afraid to say what I really wanted to.
"Bro., come on I saw the way you were looking at me at lunch and then I again saw you staring at my dick while changing for gym today."
"You saw that?" I said trying to shirk my desire not to talk about this.
"Yes, come on tell me!" He said with a roar.
"Are you sure you want to hear it?"
"Yes Dam it, SPILL IT!" He yelled.
"Ok man." And I actually started to tear up a little. He then put his hand on my shoulder and rubbed it in a friendly manner.
"No matter what I will always be your friend."
I tried to get the words out and my voice cracked as I began. "Look Josh, I'm Gay and I think I'm in love with you." Holly crap did I just say that, it just came out. I then tried to take back what I had just said. "Sorry man, I did not mean that."
"Yes you did, and I still am your friend but I don't like you in that way. Let's go home, ok."
"Ok, you really don’t care?" I said.
“Nope.” He answered and we were quite the rest of the way home to my house. We had plans to do home work together today and when we reached my house I expected him to go home but he said. "Hey we are still on for home work and play station right?"
"Are you sure you want to." I responded
"Yes dummy, like I said I'm still your friend even if you want to suck me off." He said with a snicker. And that's how it went for the rest of the day, I could not believe it he was cool with it even if I would never get any of him but that's cool I'd rather have him as a friend than not at all. Weeks went by as they always do. Josh would sometimes make fun of me by, saying something like. ‘Hey that guy has a nice cock, why don't you go suck him.’ Or he would flash his but at me and say ‘I bet you wish you could touch this’ and I would smile and think hell yes. Other than that everything went normally for us. We still hung out together. The only difference was he was a little shy when changing in front of me during gym class. The more and more I thought about Josh, the more in love I became with him. To the point it hurt to think about it, knowing I would never be able have him. Then one day while surfing the Nifty archive for stories I think I found an answer. I was doing my usual reading teen boy stories then I scrolled to the bottom and found a transgender story for teens. I got interested and started to read it. It was about a boy who wanted more than anything to be a girl and it ended up him going on a date with a friend of his and kissing. Which intrigued me to no end and I thought to myself, I wonder if I could dress as a girl and find a way to go on a date with Josh. I got up and went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror and wondered if I looked feminine enough to do it. I was still unsure, so I went to ask my mother. Now let me tell you now my mother has always known I was gay and that I had a crush on Josh. We never kept any secrets from each other. So I asked her. "Mom, do you think I look like a girl?"
"Why do you ask honey?" she said with a worried look.
"Well, I just want to know if I could pass for a girl if I dressed the part." I asked again.
She looked at me quizzically for a second then said. "Is this a way to try and go out with Josh?"
"Yes." I responded a little embarrassed.
"Do you think that is a good Idea?" She asked with concern in her voice.
"It's the best one I can think of mom? I don't know what else I can do, and I love Josh so much I would do any think to go out with him."
"I know honey I just don't want Josh or you to get hurt."
"I know mom, but will you help me look pretty. If it does not work at least I tried." I answered hopefully.
"Ok, honey I'll help. I know how much you care for Josh, but as soon as you get serious, like kissing, I want you to tell him who you are."
"I will mom, don't worry."
"Ok honey, I trust you to make the right decision. How do want me to help?"
"Well I want to be pretty for him and I need the right clothes so I guess we should start by going shopping."
"Ok, we will go Thursday after school so you can be ready by Friday for Josh, but that part is up to you ok."
"Ok mom, you got a deal."
So that was the deal, mom would help me dress as a girl and I would find a way to get a date with Josh once I was dressed properly. I went to my room to think about how to make it happen. Then it came to me in a flash every Friday Josh and I went to the local arcade to play our favorite game. I could just show up their dressed as a girl and play that game and see what happens. So now I have my plan. Well Thursday finally came and I rushed home from school. I ran into the front door of the house and yelled "Mom I'm home let’s go!"
She responded "Not so fast young man, or should I say young Lady, get your but into the shower and use this cream on yourself from the shoulders down."
"What is this for mom?"
"It's hair remover, it will help you fit the part of a young lady."
"Ok thanks mom."
I went to my room shucked my close off and jumped into the shower. I washed my hair and then used the cream mom handed me. I waited a few minutes to rinse off, I watched in amazement as my body hair washed down the drain. I was completely hairless from the neck down. It looked weird but felt very nice. I then dried off and went back to my room to get dressed. As I walked into my room my mom followed me in, she had a small shopping bag with her and she handed it to me. With a puzzled look I asked. "What's in the bag?"
"Proper undergarments for shopping to get girls clothes honey go ahead and put them on and then get dressed in some jeans and a T-shirt."
I took the bag and said. "Ok, thanks again mom.”
She then left the room and I dropped my towel and opened the bag. I was amazed at what I found inside, a pair of pink satin panties, and matching bra. I thought how cool, an early start. I put them on but realized that the bra was a little difficult at first but I got it on by pulling around front and clasping it together that way. I then pulled up the panties and I must confess the felt wonderful. I finished with a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and pulled on my shoes and ran down the stairs to let my mother know I was ready to go. She grabbed her purse and we left for the mall. My first ever trip to shop for girls clothes. I had no idea what my mom had planned for the afternoon. I was a little scared but otherwise ok about not knowing what was to come. We soon arrived at the mall and mom parked outside a major department store. We walked in and went straight for the juniors department and boy was I in for a learning experience. I had been in that area before, but I never really paid any attention. I never would have guessed that there was so much to choose from. We started to look around and my mom bluntly said. "What would you like to get?"
"I have no idea, what do you think?
"Ok Shawn let’s see".
We looked around and she would ask my opinion about a certain dress or skirt, I had no clue. All I wanted is to look good so I picked a few out and said. "We should try these."
"Ok." She said and she pointed me towards the dressing rooms. I then turned white, she can’t be serious oh my god, I thought, is she crazy. She obviously saw my misgivings and horror. "You'll have to try them on to get a proper fit so you look good for Josh."
That did it I was in the dressing room in a second. Both dresses I had picked out fit good and looked really nice. With some padding up top, a wig and makeup I think this is going to work. That's when my mom asked to see me so she could see how the dress fit. I hesitantly stepped out of the safety of the dressing room and showed my mom. At the same time the sales lady walked up and asked if we could use any help. We both said no. Then she surprised us both by saying "That dress suits your daughter very nicely."
"Thank you." My mom told her.
After putting my heart back in my chest I put on my regular clothes. We went to the counter to pay for the things we liked. I ended up with two dresses, one skirt, a few blouses, 3 pairs of panty hose and 2 pairs of shoes. I did not get heals though I wasn't ready for those yet. My mother and I then walked out of the mall and she drove for a block or so and pulled over and surprised me and said. "Are you ready for the next step?"
"What step is that?" I asked a little confused.
"You will see in a minute, go over to that bathroom in the park and take an outfit and put it on then I'll tell you where were going."
I was a little apprehensive but did as she asked. I think she was having more fun with this then I was. I walked towards the bathrooms and stopped in front of the men's room and looked at mom for assurance. She casually pointed towards the women's bathroom. I looked over and got the hint. I walked into forbidden territory and started to undress. There I was a boy in the women's restroom in nothing other than a bra and panties. I then set my clothes on the bench and started to pull out the items I would be wearing. I first pulled out a package of tan nylons and put them on. Let me tell you, they are harder to put on then it looks. I got them on eventually. I then took out the dress and slipped on over my head, again did not look quite right. I then got an idea. I then grabbed some toilet paper and stuffed the bra until I was satisfied with the size of my new bust. I pulled out the white flat shoes and slipped them on. I looked in the mirror and saw myself in a dress for the first time. Ok for a start oh well I'm not done yet, this is just the beginning. I then folded my old clothes and put them in the bag I brought with me. I then straightened the dress and walked out to the car. As I opened the door and sat my mom corrected me by saying I should smooth the dress under me before I sit. So I tried again and did it right.
She then said. "You look nice sweet heart, by the way have you thought of a name for yourself yet?"
"Um No, I haven't." I thought for a few seconds then thought of my favorite character, How about Sara?"
"That's sounds perfect, Sara, yes perfect."
"Thanks mom."
We then began to drive of too who knows were. We then pulled in front of my mother's beauty salon. I then felt really uneasy. But she promised only her friend would their and would not tell anyone else. So I reluctantly walked into the salon. I was greeted by Carol my mother' hair dresser and close friend.
"Hello Fran and this is?" she said.
"This is my daughter Sara." Mom pointed to me.
"Well hello Sara and welcome, come over here and sit" She pointed to one of the chairs next to a sink and mirror.
I started to feel a little better when I saw she was not going to freak on me. Mom must have briefed her beforehand. As I sat in front of Carol she asked. "Have you given any thought to what type of hair style you would like?"
"No, not really, I just thought I could get a wig of some sort or pick form a selection." I responded hoping she would have one that I would like.
She then said. "That sounds good and easy. Let's see what we have and then you can pick any color you like."
"Blond" I said a little too quickly but no one seemed to notice.
"Ok, let me go and look."
As she left for the back room my mom smiled at me and said. "Are you sure you want to do this?"
"Yes mother more than anything." I answered.
In a few minutes Carol came back out with a nice looking Strawberry blond wig. She placed it on my head and adjusted it a few times then asked what I thought about it. I looked in the mirror and saw a cute teen aged girl in the mirror looking back at me.
"Wow, even without makeup I look like a girl." My mom shook her head in agreement. Then Carol led me to another table in the salon and began to apply makeup on my face. While she was doing that another woman from the salon took my right hand and began clipping and shaping my nails. After both were done I got to look at myself in the mirror and was totally amazed at how I looked. Even to me I looked like a babe. I thought to myself that I am going to pull this off with ease, I am going to make Josh's heart pound.
"You know Shawn; you look relay good, pretty even." My mom said looking at me with a smile.
"I know mom, it's almost scary." I said looking at my new self.
"I guess I should call you Sara from now on?" Mom said rubbing my shoulder.
"Yes, I should say so, so that we don't confuse anyone for now." I told her confidently and was sure no one would realize I was a boy in a dress.
Then I got a good look at my finger nails, they were longer than before. My mom must have seen my puzzled look on my face. "Honey, you know we will be able to remove those before you go back to school Monday."
"Oh, ok. They do look nice though.” I really did like the look that the nails and make up completed. “Thanks for all the help today Carol, I love the look.”
"You are so welcome Sara; I just hope I get to see you again some time.”
"You will see me for sure, see you next week." My mom answered and looked me over one more time.
“Have a good day Carol; I will see you soon too.” I told her, I had just realized I loved all this extra attention from my mom and had decided that Sara had to come out again some time.
My mom and I walked out of the Salon to the car and drove home. On our way home I told mom of my plan on how to bump into Josh Friday. She said it was a good Idea.
Friday morning I woke up and got ready for my day. Today being a school holiday, I knew Josh would be at the arcade early, so I gave him a call.
"Hello."
"Hey Josh its Shawn. Are you still going to the arcade today?"
"Hell yes, you ready to get your ass whopped?"
"Ha" I laughed. "In your dreams, well anyway I can't make it. I have to go to the doctors with my mom today."
"I hope it's not fatal." He chuckled.
"No my mom wants me to get a checkup and the only appointment they had was for today, but I will try and make it later in the afternoon."
"Ok Shawn, I'll see you later."
"Ok, later dude, bye."
After Josh hung up I check myself in the mirror and made sure I looked nothing like my old self, but what I saw was Sara, the new me and I must say I liked what I saw then wondered this is going to work. I then walked to the corner and waited for the bus to take me to the arcade four miles away. Within five minutes the bus arrived then I was on my way to the arcade. No one on the bus gave me a second look as I sat and waited for the bus to get to the mall.
Chapter 2: The Arcade
I arrived at the arcade in good time and I got off of the bus and walked to the end of the mall where the arcade was. As I walked in Josh was at our favorite game playing away. I walk up behind him cautiously as if I was interested in the game he was playing. He was doing well but not as good as me. I watched for a few minutes. Then he lost the game at a level I had beaten long ago. He turned around, saw me and smiled.
He greeted me as I walked up closer to the game. "Hi, do you know how to play this game?"
"Just a little bit." I answered.
"Would you like to play two players? I'll pay."
"Sure, I'd love too."
He then put in the right amount of quarters for two players and then we began to play. At first I was keeping myself from going a level above him, but after a while he was making the same mistakes he always did. So with sure experience I past him up and won the game and I even beat my own highest score. We both entered our initials and ended the game. He looked at me weird then smiled at me and said. "Either your good at this game, or It was just luck?"
"It's just luck I guess?" I said.
He then asked me "Hey would you like to grab a bite to eat with me?"
"Yah, I would love to." I said anxiously and I thought to myself, this is actually working.
He held out his hand and I reached for it and I held his hand for the first time. Oh what a feeling, I was so nervous. I began to perspire. I hope he doesn't notice. We walked out towards the food court and got some burgers and cokes. We sat down and began to eat.
He then asked "You sure were good at that game, are you sure you don't play it much?"
"Like I said, I've played it a few times before I guess I got lucky, like you said."
"Uh huh sure!" He said with a laugh. "My name is Josh, what's yours?"
"Sara" I said.
After our lunch Josh stood up and asked. "Hey, would you like to go see a movie with me today?"
"Yes!" I said, just a little too enthusiastically.
He then said "What would you like to see?"
I had to think quickly. "Um, How about Mission to Mars?"
"That sound great, let's go." Josh agreed to my movie choice.
So off we went to the theater and arrived ten minutes before show time, what luck. Josh bought the tickets, took my hand in his and led the way towards the concessions line. He bought us some popcorn and some drinks. We then choose seats in the back of the theater and sat down and waited for the movie to start. The lights went down, the music started and the film began. After a while he reached for my hand and held it in his. We sat like that for a while. Then during the dance scene he put his arm around my shoulder and put his hand on my right breast. I could feel it and I shuddered. I fell totally in love. I knew then that I had him, and thought what the hell and I put my left hand in his lap and felt his manhood for the first time in my life. It was wonderful and he was hard. I ran my hand up and down the shaft several times and at the same time was also looking into his gorgeous eyes. He had a very content look on his face then leaned toward me and touched his lips to mine and we kissed for the first time. It was the most wonderful feeling in the world but soon realized my promise to my mom and I got scared at the same time so I pulled away from him and said, "Sorry I can't do this Josh" and then ran out of the theater towards the front doors.
Josh caught up with me as I reached for the door to open it; he grabbed me by the arm and yelled. "Shawn, wait!"
I thought I was going to die. He knows who I am and as I turned to face him with tears welling in my eyes and said.
"How did you know?"
"I've known since the arcade"
"What, how?" I said.
When you won the game you used your usual initials."
"Oh shit" I said.
"Yep, that's when I realized who you were and how you were dressed and said what the hell, if he is willing to dress like that and look as good as you do why not humor him."
"Really?"
"Yes really, but something happened while we were eating."
"What's that Josh?"
"I was thinking about you, I began to realize I was attracted to you, the real you. I’ve been hiding my feelings for you a long time and not acting on them, for fear you would hate me. After you told me how you’re truly felt I was stunned and happy at the same time but for some reason I couldn’t find the courage to tell you how I felt for you. Then during the movie I thought now is the time to show you how I feel and too see might happen. I love you as you, or as Sara, I don’t care which. I love being with you more than any person in the world.
"It was wonderful Josh; I love you so much too, what happens next?"
"I know, I think we should find somewhere else to talk"
"Ok, how's my house sound?"
"Good, let's go."
"Ok." About fifteen minutes later we arrived at my house. My mom's car was in the driveway and we entered the house and my mom was sitting in the living room, she smiled at us and motioned for us to sit. I smoothed my dress, took Josh’s hand in mine and we sat on the couch next to each other. Mom smiled at us and started asking questions.
“So how was your date?” Mom finally asked smiling bigger.
Authors Notes
I ended it here because this is where the original story I posted all those years ago ended. I changed the wording to make it work together a little better and to give myself a place to start the next chapter.
Coming soon, Chapter 3:
I know some of you asked me to keep the story clean. My story must move forward and Josh and Sara’s relationship must also move forward, so in chapter 3 you will find descriptions of their budding relationship, including sexual. I apologize for those who asked for a clean story, but it’s how I see them growing into a true relationship. But I do promise to keep it from becoming too graphic, it’s my intent to keep this series rated R. Thanks again for reading. Sara D.
By SaraD
Nick finally finds the courage to venture out of the house dressed as Nicole only to return to a house on fire with his parents screaming to firemen to rescue him from the burning house. Special thanks are in order to Michelle B. for editing this for me.
By SaraD
All the preparation, practice and the many hours in front of the mirror, dressing and applying makeup, had finally, in my mind, come to a conclusion. I was going to venture out of the house for the first time. It was just after midnight, I had it all planned out, I knew exactly what I was going to wear. A beautiful blue and white sheath dress, tan pantyhose and two inch blue open toe heels. I had shaved my under arms and legs in the shower before I faked going to bed.
I already had on my light blue satin panties; I then added the matching blue satin bra. I shivered as I pulled the pantyhose up my smooth legs. I slipped the dress over my head, stood at my mirror and looked at the familiar feminine figure staring back at me. Nicole stood five foot five, had long wavy brown hair that touched her shoulders, green eyes and lightly tanned skin from the summer sun. I sat at my makeshift vanity, a towel set on top of my dresser. I put on a light shade of blue eye shadow, pink lipstick, blush, black eyeliner and finally did my eye lashes.
My plan was working as I had hoped; mom and dad were in bed as well as my twelve year old sister. Once I was satisfied with my look I grabbed my shoes and carefully climbed out to the window. Once I was safely on the ground I slipped on my heels and walked quietly out the back gate.
I loved the feeling of the breeze as it tickled the fabric of the dress against my nylon covered legs; it’s such an exhilarating feeling.
I began walking down the sidewalk heading for the park three blocks away. I made it all the way and sat on one of the swings. I felt much younger than my fifteen years as I began to swing back and forth. I lost track of time since I did not have on a watch. I thought it best to get home before someone realizes I was out of the house. Besides, I did not want to be caught dressed as a girl. I knew I would tell my parents, just not yet. You know what it’s like, all the fear and anxiety.
I put my luxurious night behind me and began the three block walk home. I did not hurry as I wanted to relish in my accomplishment of getting this far. It was easy after all, no one was out and there were very few cars on the street at this time of night. I made it to the first corner and stepped out into the street to cross and I heard the loud wail of sirens from my right. I looked and saw two fire engines, a police car and an ambulance barreling past me. I didn’t think anything about it because this street was the main thoroughfare and was often used by emergency services. I once again began to casually walk the rest of the way home.
As I turned the corner to get to my street, I saw all the flashing lights of the fire, police and ambulance. I realized immediately they were fighting a blazing fire at my house. My heart leapt into my throat as I approached my panic stricken family. I saw that my dad was yelling at a fireman to rescue his son from the now engulfed house.
I looked at the faces of my sister and mom who were sobbing uncontrollably. I knew then they were crying because they thought I was asleep in my burning bedroom.
I looked around and saw that firemen were frantically pulling hoses out and watched as they began dowsing the flames with water. The thick black smoke made it hard to see the house; all I could see were bright flames breaking through the front windows and engulfing the roof. A brave fireman quickly swung a fire hose in that direction to prevent the flames from spreading to the house next door. The front door of our house was broken in by another fireman who rushed in with an axe. I was frozen in place as I tried to go and comfort my family as I struggled with being caught.
I finally found the courage and walked as quickly as I could, in my heels, to let my parents know I was ok. Slowly and fearing for my life, I walked up to my mom, as she turned and saw me. She gasped in relief as she realized I was out of the house.
“Oh my God, Nick your ok.” Mom said and gave me a hug.
I could feel her wrap her arms around me squeezing me tightly. My dad turned his head and he also breathed a sigh of relief.
“Thank God you’re safe.” He joined mom and then my sister in a group hug.
I was visually shaking in fear and pain. Not for just being caught dressed as a girl but also for watching in awe as all of our memories were being whipped away by the fire. We all just held each other for a while and then after a few minutes, we were backed away by the firemen to the opposite side of the street.
“It’s much safer on this side of the street.” The fireman said. “I’m glad to see you found your daughter and that she is safe.” He said running off and helped battle the blaze.
Dad, mom and Heather all looked at me with a confused look but seemed to be too emotional to ask the obvious question on their minds. Mom just gave me a look then they focused on the efforts of the firefighters. The firemen quickly had the flames under control as they worked to put out the fire. The fire was soon out and a group of firemen were hosing down the hot spots. I could see as the smoke began to clear that the firemen had cut a hole in our roof and the front of our house was completely destroyed. The only portions of the house that were spared were the back and the garage.
A tall slender firewoman wearing a white shirt walked up to us once the chaos had subsided.
“Hello, my name is Kathy Doran, and I’m the Fire Inspector for the county. We found the initial source for the fire; it was an electrical short in the front room.” She said in a monotone voice. “I will give you a full report once I complete my investigation. Here is my card; you can give it and my report number to your insurance agent… MR?” She said handing my dad a card.
“Carlson? Thank you Ms. Doran, My family and I appreciate the actions of the fire department for what they did in trying to save our home.” Dad said visibly upset.
“That is what we are here for Mr. Carlson.” She said as she shook my father’s hand. “My, don’t you have on a pretty dress.” She said looking at me. “What’s your name sweetie, were you coming home from a date?” She said trying to lighten the mood.
Mom and dad both looked at me and I swallowed hard and smiled at the fire inspector.
“I’m Nicole.” I said not knowing how to answer the second part of her question.
“You have two very lovely daughters Mr. and Mrs. Carlson.” She said sweetly. “Oh good here comes Red Cross.” She said as a white van with a red cross on the door pulled up.
I could have just died right there, she had no clue I was a boy, and to make it worse I could not tell if mom and dad were upset about how I was dressed. A nice looking lady with a Red Cross t-shirt came up and greeted us.
“Hi, my name is Samantha Thompson from Red Cross; I am here to help you, and please call me Samantha.” She said somberly.
My dad, ever strong, answered for us. “I’m James Carlson, Samantha this is my wife Karen and.” He paused for a second looking at me then at my mom.
“These are our daughters Nicole and Heather.” Mom quickly piped in saving my dad from an obvious dilemma as what to say.
“I am very sorry for the loss of your home. As the regional manager for Red Cross, I am here to help find you a place to stay, clothes to wear and food to bide you over until your insurance company takes action.” She then handed my dad a packet of information and food vouchers. “It’s good that you have two daughters. It makes it easier to find you a place to stay tonight, just give me a minute to make a few calls.” She said quickly as she made a few calls on her cell.
A fireman came over and gave each of us a blanket to keep us warm. He must have thought I was cold because I was shivering in fear of what might happen next.
Samantha quickly got off of the phone and explained what would happen next. “I’ve got a place for you at the YMCA for tonight, a room for you and your wife Mr. Carlson, and a bigger room for your daughters that can hold 15 girls.”
“You don’t have anything else were we could stay together?” Dad asked probably fearing I would be discovered as a boy.
“I’m afraid not for tonight at least, you can find a hotel tomorrow if you like. I had our phone center check and there are no vacancies for tonight. I am truly sorry for the inconvenience Mr. Carlson.”
“Don’t be, you’re doing what you can to help us and I thank you for what you are doing, and please call me James.” Dad said politely.
“No problem James. If you will come with me, I’ll take you to the YMCA and get you settled.”
The four of us piled into the van; Dad took the front passenger seat, mom took the next seat and I began to slide in next to her.
“Smooth your skirt and watch your knees honey.” Mom said calmly as I complied and sat next to her. I gave her a half smile as Heather climbed in next to me. I was surprised when mom put her arm around my shoulder and hugged me to her. “Everything will be ok, you’re very pretty.”
“Thanks. Are you mad at me?” I asked as I began to cry again.
“No I’m not mad sweetie, just disappointed you thought you couldn’t come and talk to me about this.” Mom said looking at me.
“I was afraid of what you might think.”
“We can talk about this later.”
“Ok.”
As I said that I looked over at my sister to try and gage how she felt seeing me all dressed up as a girl.
“I’ve known for age’s sis. You’re not very good at hiding your things. I’m not mad; I think I will love having a sister.”
I gave Heather a hug and we cried the rest of the way to the YMCA. Our emotions weren’t under control. As far as we knew we had just lost everything in our home. The next few days were going to be stressful.
We finally arrived at the YMCA and were greeted by volunteers. Each of them was very nice and tried to help us as much as they could. In the reception area we were asked a few questions. A nice woman brought us to a counter and asked mom.
“Good evening my name is Donna, what are your ages and sizes; I need those so we can get you some clothes and some pajamas for your daughter there.” She said pointing at me and smiled. “That’s a pretty dress.”
Mom spoke before I could answer, not that I could.
“Nicole she’s 15 and a size?” She looked at me because she obviously did not know my female clothes size.
“I’m a size nine.” I said quietly and mom continued.
“Heather is 12 and a size six.” Mom finished.
Donna then led us to the back room where we were able to pick out clothes for each of us. She handed me a white cotton nightie.
“This should suit you for the night. You and your sister go ahead and pick clothes to tide you over for a few days.” She led us to some shelves in the back of the room with donated clothes in each cubicle with sizes labeled on each shelf. I looked through them and found a nice pair of flared jeans and a pink t-shirt. Heather picked almost the same colors I had.
“Look, our clothes will match for tomorrow.” Heather said showing me her choices.
“I remember saying something similar to my sister when I was your age.” Donna said and handed my sister and I packages of panties, they were all white cotton. She then led us to the shoes and Heather and I picked from the pile. I picked a simple white pair of walking shoes and Heather did the same.
Donna had us gather up our things and we met back with our parents. My mom and dad both had their hands full of clothes as Donna led us to the sleeping area. Mom and dad were given a small room with two small cots and a chair. Mom still looked sad, and dad was putting on a brave front.
It took me by surprise when dad asked if he could hug us kids.
“Come here and give your dad a hug.”
Both Heather and I obliged and hugged him tight.
“I love you too more than anything; I was really scared when I thought you were trapped in the fire Nicole. I was so relieved when you showed up ok.”
Did dad just call me Nicole; He was referring to me by my female name and only after hearing it for the first time tonight.
“I love you too,” Mom said joining the hug. “Now you two get some sleep and we’ll talk in the morning, we are going to have a lot to talk about.”
“Thanks Mom, dad, I love you too.” I told them.
“I love you both too, and Nicole.” Heather said putting emphasis on my new name.
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Author’s Note: The End, or is it, you decide. Please leave feedback.
Nick woke up jittery and was worried what his parents might be truly thinking. Special thanks are in order to Michelle B. for editing this for me.
By SaraD
I woke up with jittery nerves and I was worried about how my parents would react to seeing me dressed as a girl last night. I knew dad was a man’s man and that I would probably catch hell today. Mom came in to wake us up. She saw me already awake and sitting on the edge of my bed sweating.
“What’s the matter sweetheart, aren’t you feeling well.” Mom asked with concern.
“I’m scared mom of what dad will say to me.”
Mom looked at me and then spoke in a comforting tone. “Look Nick, your father and I talked last night. While he does not understand why you were dressed as a girl he is willing to talk to you about it. We will talk while eating some breakfast.” Mom said as Heather opened her eyes.
“Mommy, was it a dream last night.” Heather said looking sad.
“No honey, unfortunately it wasn’t. Your father and I are just happy the two of you are ok. Go ahead and get dressed and then we will have a talk.”
Heather looked at me and smirked. “We’re going to talk about you being a girl I bet.”
“Yes Heather, we are going to be talking as a family about how Nick is dressed.”
“I thought her name was Nicole mom?” Heather asked mom, I could not help myself and I had to hug Heather tight.
“I love you Heather.” I said to her.
“I love you too sis.” She said back.
“Ok you two, now hurry up and get dressed. Your father is waiting.”
“Ok mom,” we both said in unison.
Heather and I put on the clothes that we had picked out the night before. I could still smell the faint aroma of the perfume I had used the night prior. Heather even helped me with my clothes. Neither of us had makeup, but I was pleased that I still looked feminine as I could still see traces of mascara. Once we were done I felt a little fear as we began to walk out of the cubicle we had slept in. Heather grabbed me by the arm and dragged me along.
“Come on Nicole, you can’t hide forever you know. Daddy will still love you; he might kill you, but he still loves you.” She said with a laugh.
“That’s not very funny; I’m scared enough as it is.”
“Sorry Nicole I was just trying to make you laugh.”
Dad and Mom were waiting for us in the lobby of the YMCA; Dad was on the phone yelling at someone. He saw us come up, his face was red and the slammed his cell phone shut. Dad must have left early and picked up the car from the house. I wanted to ask about the house and if there was anything that we could save, but he looked really mad.
“Get in the car.” Dad yelled as he got into the car then slammed his door shut. “I hope you’re happy with yourself Nicole.” He screamed and threw the morning paper in my lap. I looked at it then back at my dad in confusion.
“Read the front page you fucking sissy.” He yelled.
I could not help it and I started to cry. Why he was so mad at me.? He seemed ok last night.
Mom, bless her soul, spoke up for me. “James don’t you dare call Nicole a sissy. We don’t even know why she was dressed that way last night.”
I regained my composure. “I’m sorry for hurting you; I just needed time to figure things out. That is why I dressed up last night and went out. I needed to know I could do it on my own before I talked to you about how I feel.” I said between sobbing.
“Quit your crying boy, or I’ll give you something to cry about. Now you just read that article and you will see what kind of trouble you’ve gotten all of us into.” Dad was visibly pissed at me and I felt responsible, but what could be in the paper that made it so bad.
I heard a slap and saw my dad’s head move to the left. “I already told you not to talk to her like that James; if you do that to our child one more time. I swear to GOD I will leave you and take the kids with me!” Mom said with anger and a very red face. “You can read the article when you feel like it honey. Nothing was your fault.” Mom said in a much calmer tone.
I picked up the paper and unfolded the local section dad had thrown at me. On the front page of that section there was a picture of the four of us standing in front of our burning house with a fire truck behind us. You could clearly make out our faces and who we were. I paused as my stomach became tight and read the head line.
‘Family Left Homeless After Devastating Fire.’
I also looked at the caption under the picture.
‘James Carlson and his wife Karen and their daughters Nicole and Heather are pictured standing in front of their lifelong home.’
I read the article and it had our address and it listed the house as destroyed and that nothing inside the house was salvageable, with the exception of the garage. I swallowed hard at the thought of everyone I knew would know I dressed as a girl.
“I’m sorry mom, dad. I did not mean for this to happen.”
“It’s not your fault sweetheart; we will get through this as a family.” Mom said and turned around and comforted me by rubbing my knee.
“Look son, we are going to have a rough time ahead of all of us, and I think all the stress from last night just caught up to me. I am sorry for yelling at you.” Dad said as we pulled up to a red light. “I should not have said the thing I did.”
Dad turned around to me and kind of gave me a half smile, and then I saw the love in his eyes.
“Can you forgive me for all of this?” I asked.
“Forgive you; I should be to one who is asking for forgiveness.” Dad said as the light turned green. “We will figure out as a family how to confront those who might have questions about why you are dressed as a girl.”
Dad continued driving and eventually we pulled up to our fire damaged house. The house looked bad, the whole front of the house had been charred by flames and you could see directly to the back of the house. As we all got out, I could see that the red car from the fire department was parked in the front. We were greeted once again by the same fire inspector from last night.
“Mr. Carlson, I have finished my investigation. You and your family are now allowed access to the house to see if you can find anything that you might be able to salvage. I am truly sorry for your loss.” Mrs. Doran said. “Here is a copy of my findings for your insurance adjuster.” And she handed the report to my dad.
“Thank you Kathy, Is there any areas we should avoid?” Dad asked.
“Just stay clear of the kitchen area, the roof over that area was cut open by the firefighters and the ceiling in there is still soaked in water and might fall. Otherwise the rest is ok, just be careful and watch your step.”
“Thanks.” Dad said and then motioned for us to follow him in. “Let’s go, Nicole I want you to keep an eye on Heather.”
“Ok dad.” I was a little surprised he used my girl name, but I wasn’t complaining.
“Now Heather I want you to be careful and listen to your sister.”
“I will dad.” Heather said then gave me a slap on the shoulder and mouthed ‘sister’. I pinched her left arm and then smiled at her. We walked carefully into the house. There was little left to salvage. I found a few photo albums of ours that were left untouched by the fire. There was nothing left of any of my personnel stuff in my room, no clothes, books and even my computer were gone.
All of us were equally upset at how much we had lost. Dad was glad that most of the tools were spared in the garage; he had us help him put some of them in the back of the car.
“That’s enough for today; I am so sorry that we came up with so little. We will just have to start over.” Dad said trying to sound brave but doing a bad job of it. Dad then drove us back to the shelter and sat us all down.
“Please sit down Nicole, Heather, your mom and I want to talk to you.” Dad said as we sat on their bed. “It’s pretty clear that we will need to do some shopping for clothes for all of us after seeing the house today. We have all lost years of memories. We will just make new ones.” He said again.
“What we want to know from especially you Nicole is what type of clothes are we to get you.” Mom paused for a moment. “Think this through before you decide, this is your chance to be honest with us and tell us how you truly feel and how you want to spend the rest of your life. No matter what you decide your father and I will support you.”
I thought about it for a minute and decided it was time to come clean with my parents and tell them the whole truth and leave nothing out. “Mom, Dad, I have been feeling out of sorts for years, almost like I was supposed to be someone else. It is a most unusual feeling not knowing who you are. One day about a year ago I found one of Heather’s skirts in the laundry hamper. Something came over me and I had to try it on. It was certainly a bit tight but I got it on. I looked at myself in the mirror in the bathroom and everything felt right.” I paused for a second to catch my breath. “All the weird feelings I was having were gone and I found myself feeling ok for the first time in a while. It scared me a lot and I didn’t think about it for a few days until I saw another of Heathers skirts, and one again I just had to try it on. All the feelings of being different went away for a while but I was scared at what was happening to me.” I paused in case mom or dad had questions.
“I can imagine you were quite scared.” Mom said looking at me with wonder. “How did you get to look so good last night?” Mom asked.
“I’ve had a lot of practice mom. After doing some looking around the internet I found web sites with stories and articles about people like me. Many of the stories were based on magic or other stuff. I found myself identifying with the ones were the person always felt they were always girls. I also began reading your magazines. The articles had tips on all sorts of subjects, and I studied them and made notes on how to apply makeup and how to dress properly for a girl my age.” I paused again to catch my breath.
“So what you are telling me is that you feel you are a girl on the inside and want to make the outside match?” Dad asked looking at me with a strange look as if he was surprised he actually asked that.
“Yes that is what she is saying James.” Mom said sarcastically. “Go ahead and finish honey.”
“Well after I got that paper route, I started saving the money I was making. After I thought I had enough money, I went out and got clothes my size and some makeup. Once I had it, I began to practice. Last night was a big step for me. I knew it was only time before I knew I had to tell you how I felt. But I needed to know I could dress up completely and going out last night was to feel the freedom of dressing as a girl outside the confines of my room. It was an exhilarating night that is until I saw the house was on fire.”
“It sounds as if you were trying to overcome your fears. What would you like to do from here? Like I said, it is up to you as how we proceed, with the help of professionals of course.” Mom told me.
“To be honest, I would like nothing more than to live and dress as a girl from this day forward. I know I will have hurdles to overcome.”
“Yes you will and I want you to realize that most people may not like what you are doing. You will be faced with ridicule from some of those you encounter. I want you to think about taking some self defense classes so you can protect yourself.” Dad said sternly.
“Ok dad that is reasonable and sounds like a good idea.”
“That’s good; I will call my friend Mark Tyler and set up classes for you once we get settled. Now we need to get some basic clothes for each of us and find a more permanent place to stay. I say we split up, Karen you take Nicole and Heather shopping for clothes and pick me up a few things. I will look around to see if I can find us a place to stay together until our home is ready.”
Dad then drove us to the local mall and Mom, Heather and I stepped out of the car. Dad leaned over to the passenger side. “Let’s keep in touch; I’ll pick you up in a few hours, otherwise call me when you are ready.”
“Ok James and make sure you are careful by yourself today.”
“I will Karen, I love you all.” Dad said and then drove off leaving us at the mall.
I began to walk to the doors of the mall and then stopped dead in my tracks; there standing in a group of girls was Amy Reed my current girlfriend. She saw my mom and sister walk up, and then her eyes went wide when she looked at me. I thought for sure she would laugh and break up with me. She left the girls she was with behind and walked up to us.
“Hello Mrs. Carlson, Heather.” She said greeting us then whispered to me. “What’s your name?”
“Nicole.” I said and began to tremble.
“You look nice Nicole, nice to meet you.” She then gave me a friendly hug. “What are you doing, are you out shopping today?”
“Basically.” I answered, and then told her about what had happened last night as we walked into the mall. The girls she had been with had gone somewhere else. “What about your friends?” I asked.
“I am so sorry to hear about your house, please if there is anything I can do to help, ask.” She said then explained about her friends. “We were done for today, Carla’s mom was due to pick us up. I just told them I saw someone I knew and would find another way home.”
“You are more than welcome to get a ride with us later, I am sure that Nicole will want help picking out a new wardrobe.” Mom told Amy.
“I’d be happy to help her.”
We all walked into the first store and Amy began picking out clothes for me to try on. I was overwhelmed with anticipation and excitement at being able to try on girl’s clothes and use the women’s fitting room. It turned out to be a nice day for shopping and after visiting all the stores we were all loaded down with bags of new clothes and shoes. Mom gave dad a call on the cell to pick us up as we were walking towards the exit. He told mom it would take about 45 minutes to get back to the mall.
“Well that gives us time to see if we can get into the Salon.” Mom stated then led us into what had been forbidden territory for me.
“Good afternoon, what can I do for you ladies?” The nice woman at the counter asked.
"My daughters and I would like our hair and nails done, and Nicole here,” Mom put her hand on my shoulder “would like her ears pierced.”
I kind of cringed as I thought about the impending pain, but was relieved that it did not hurt at all and I had some nice new gold studs put into the new holes. Once I was told how to care for my new earrings and how to prevent the holes from closing up, I enjoyed the feeling of my new jewelry.
I must tell you the experience of the salon girl putting on the full set of nail and how it felt when she shaped and polished them was exhilarating to say the least. Amy kept smiling at me the whole time while watching. I knew that our relationship after this would be interesting to say the least.
“Now that you’re done, how are you feeling?” Mom asked as she paid the bill.
I was staring in the mirror and did not hear what she had said. “Huh, what?”
Amy came up to me and whispered in my ear. “Your mom wants to know how you feel now.”
“I feel happy and overwhelmed at the same time, I know that there is a long road ahead of me, but I know now that this is right.” I said honestly.
“I am happy for you Nicole, and I will support you, you are after all my girlfriend.” Amy paused for a second. “I have to tell you I love you more now than ever, it’s sexy seeing you dressed so pretty.” She whispered to me.
It was my turn to look at her with wide eyes, she simply smiled at me knowingly and left it at that. We all grabbed our bags and headed out to wait for dad. He was already waiting for us as we got to the side walk. He has standing by the car with a smile as we walked up.
“My don’t you all look nice. Nicole you look beautiful. Are those earrings?”
“Yes daddy, all girls my age have them.”
“I was just wondering” he paused for a second then noticed Amy “Hello Amy, how are you taking all of this.”
“Just fine Mr. Carlson, I think Nicole is very brave. I will certainly have an interesting conversation with my girlfriend later.” She answered.
“Girlfriend?” Dad looked confused “Your still dating?”
“Of course we are daddy, why wouldn’t we? The clothes I wear do not change how I feel about Amy.
“I guess you’re right. By the way I’ve found us a nice apartment to stay in while the house is being rebuilt. The insurance company will replace everything. Our coverage was good and the company is being very helpful and gave us money to live on for the time being.”
With our near future taken care of, dad helped us put all the bags in the trunk. We dropped Amy off at her house, picked up our belongings at the shelter and drove to the apartment that would take the place of our home for the time being.
Once I got the lay of the new three bedroom apartment, I put all my new things away. I was still amazed at how much I had gotten, I now had all the clothes I would need to start living as I should. As I put away my last dress in the closet, I could not help smile at my good fortune in the guise of a destructive and painful fire.
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Author’s Note: The End, or is it, you decide. Please leave feedback.
Nichole was contemplating all the things that had been happening to her and her family. She sat on her unmade bed and stared at all her new clothes and began to softly cry. Edited by STANMAN63, thank you.
By SaraD
I was contemplating all the things that had been happening to all of us as I sat on my unmade bed and stared at all my new clothes and began to softly cry. I am not sure why I was crying. I then felt a light hand on my shoulder as Heather sat on my bed next to me, “What’s the matter big sister?” Heather said looking at me then she began to cry herself.
I gave her a hug just for being there, trying to comfort the both of us. I knew the past was going to be hard to forget. The fire had destroyed our home, but seems to have given new life to our family.
“I’m not sure why I was crying Heather; it must be that I finally have time to really think about things. I miss my old room as I’m sure you miss yours too.”
Heather wiped her tears and looked at me. “Yes, I miss my room too.” Heather continued to stare at me. “You know, you’re quite pretty.”
I blushed a little at her comment, and it made me feel wonderful. “Thanks Heather.”
“So tell me, Nikki, how come you never told me about you?” Heather asked kindly.
“Scared, I guess. And I’m sorry about borrowing your stuff without asking.”
“Don’t worry, sister dear, that’s what sisters are for, sharing.”
We then I heard a knock at the apartment door, and shortly after mom yell down the hall, “Nichole, Amy is here to see you.”
“OK, mom. Can you tell her I’m in my room,” I hollered back.
Amy then came into my room and joined Heather and me in talking.
“Having a nice chat?” Nichole asked as she sat at my computer chair.
“Yes we were indeed, Nikki was explaining how she was sorry for using my makeup and why she never told me about being my sister.” Heather said with a smile.
“A nice sister to sister chat, I loved having those with Susan. Now that she is in college, I don’t’ get to talk to her as much. But, now I think it would be nice to have another girl to talk to,” Amy looked right at me and smiled. “What do you think Nichole, my dear?”
“That would be great, Amy! I’ve always wanted to do that, and now I can do that with you and with Heather,” I told her with a smile.
“I know I’ve always wanted help from an older sister, now it looks as if I’m going to be helping her,” Heather said with a laugh. “I’ll leave you two alone so you can talk. See you later, sis,” Heather said as she closed my bedroom door.
“Does all of this mean you are gay Nikki, do you want to be a girl, physically?” Amy asked as she looked at me with a soft face.
I knew these questions were coming and I could not lie to Amy. “No, Amy. I am not gay, but yes, I do feel I need to be a girl. I am one on the inside, now I just have to match the outside. I hope you understand, and I love you, Amy.”
Amy’s face changed from soft to a smile. “I understand, Nikki. But if you can still love me, and you are a girl on the inside. Well that means you are gay, well at least a lesbian. I must be honest with you Nikki, I find it a bit weird that you are a girl, but I think I can live with being with you as a girl. I do love you, very much.”
Amy then leaned over to me and kissed me lightly on the lips. Her kiss felt apprehensive at first then she kissed me harder and I responded and kissed her back, “Wow that was incredible. I never realized kissing another girl would be that nice.” Amy said with a smile. “I know we have kissed in the past, but this was much better.”
“I know, it felt so natural and gave me the chills. I think you are right when you said I am just a lesbian trapped in a boy’s body. Now that everyone knows who I really am, I can freely admit it.”
“What are you going to do for school when summer is over?” Amy asked, concerned.
“Just go back to school like nothing happened. Some people will recognize me from the paper and try belittling me. But I will just hold my head high and smile.”
“Well good for you Nikki and I will support you.”
“Thanks, Amy. you’re the best girlfriend a girl could have.” I told her, smiling big. “Care to give me a hand and help me make my bed?”
“Sure,” Amy said without hesitation.
We had the bed made in a short time and a few minutes later mom called me down for dinner. Amy turned to me as we stepped out of my smaller new bedroom. "Will you go to the movies with me, tomorrow?" She asked with a smile.
"As a date?" I asked a little confused.
"Of course, silly. You are my girlfriend."
"Yes, I will go with you, Amy." I said then gave her a warm hug.
Mom saw us enter the kitchen and smiled.
"Amy, are you still OK with all of this?" Mom asked as we sat at the table.
"I'm OK with it, Mrs. Carlson. In fact I was just telling Nikki how nice it will be to have another girl my age to talk to."
"I know that from experience a good girlfriend to talk to is nice to have."
Dad joined us at the table and we sat quietly for a few moments.
"Mom, Dad, is it ok if I take Amy to the movies tomorrow for a date?" I asked it this way to let my parents know that we were still dating and to see what my dad would say. I got to see his reaction, he spit out his milk all over his shirt and wiped is chin off.
"A date?" he simply said trying to think of something to say.
"Of course a date, honey. They are still a couple and I for one will not stand in the way of true love." Mom said to dad, he still had a dumbfounded look on his face. I think he had it in his mind that I would be dating boys.
"Thank god for that, at least you still like girls." He said without realizing what he was implying.
"Honey, that means Nikki and Amy will be seen as lesbians," Mom said and then laughed, Amy and I could not help but laugh ourselves even Heather was laughing.
Oh, that is funny." Heather said
While dad just sat there and stared at the four of us girls with a stern look then his expression changed to a smile.
"I give up, you can have a relationship with whomever you want, boy, girl, or whatever. That goes for you too, Heather, when you are older of course. I think at least this way I will go gray a lot slower if I just go with the flow."
We all got up and gave my dad a hug.
"You are a wonderful husband and father, I am so lucky to have you," Mom said with a huge smile.
We all then sat back down and finished dinner.
"That was a very nice dinner, Mrs. Carlson," Amy said hugging my mom goodbye "Thanks for inviting me, Mr. Carlson." Amy said.
Dad then turned bright red as we all realized that dad had asked her over. I when straight over to him, he flinched for a second, probably thinking I was mad. I just hugged him tight and told him that I loved him, "I love you, Daddy. I love you, Mom." I said with a tear in my eye. "Thanks for understanding.
"For my new daughter, I would do anything. I realized the love you have for Amy and that you will need support from her now and when you return to school in September."
"Thank you, Daddy." I said as I squeezed the hug harder.
"You're welcome sweetie."
As I broke the hug, I gave Amy a hug and a little kiss goodbye, "I will see you tomorrow and Amy what will you tell your mom about us?"
"I haven't thought about it yet, I'll think of something. Don't worry." Amy said as she kissed me on the lips.
"MMM." I let slip at we parted and Amy left.
"It's so refreshing to see to young people in love," Mom said as we went into the kitchen to clean up.
I helped mom and Heather clean up, nothing new there. I then took a shower and slipped into my new nightie and was soon asleep.
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Author’s Note: To be continued, and as always please leave comments.