Some ordinary events in the life of an unordinary child.
Scenes from a Kid’s Life
Group 1: Peppermint, Garlic, Soup
Copyright 2006 by Jan S.
Peppermint:
As they looked through the basket of teddy bears Ally and Rocky were laughing so hard that every face the coffee bar had turned toward them and — joy being contagious — every face had a smile. I wish I could tell you what they found so funny but I don’t know what it was. I really think I should know, but I can’t figure it out.
I do know a lot about everyone in this place.
I know what kind of car the woman that just ordered the double caramel extra whip mocha and low-fat muffin drives. (Hey, don’t laugh at her, we all make choices.)
I know that, while everyone watching these two thinks they are very close and long time friends, before the last few hours at the pool, they had met only once: at a wedding over two years ago, when Ally carried a pillow with two rings on it and Rocky tried not to walk too fast or throw the flower pedals too far. That time both were too restrained, by self-consciousness and by watchful adults, to become friends.
I know the old lady in the corner doing the crossword sneaks peaks at a dictionary hidden in her purse.
I know the only people in the shop worried that the two kids might be disturbing anyone are Grace, Ally’s mother who is in her mid-forties, and Annie, Rocky’s mom who is in her early thirties. The woman sitting with their mothers is Amy, the aunt of both kids, who is about thirty. The lump under the blanket over Amy’s left shoulder is Benjamin, who is six weeks old today and is enjoying his second lunch.
Rocky is wearing a green T-shirt and has a towel wrapped around her waist that she keeps dropping (she still has her swimming suit on too). Ally has a pair of blue warm-up pants on over his trunks and has on a red knit shirt. He’s better dressed because he is on his way to visit his grandmother who is in a nursing home where she is doing well, but not recovering, after having a stroke last spring.
Ally is nine — excuse me, almost ten — years old. He isn’t really skinny but is very narrow across the shoulders and waist and he is fairly short; he isn’t aware of this last because he is one of the oldest kids in his class. His hair comes to the bottom of his ears in an August-cut; that is it hasn’t been near a pair of scissors in nearly three months. It is brown, almost light enough to be called blond, and wavy, not quite curly enough to be called curly. His eyes are hazel, so they aren’t quite any color at all (or at least they seem different colors at different times). They seem large because his eyebrows are a little darker than his hair, the lashes are long and his nose is a bit small.
Rocky is around seven months younger than Ally and is almost exactly the same height as he and weighs a bit more. Her hair almost reaches her shoulders right now (and looks like a mane) but as it dries and gets brushed it will spring up to the nape of her neck. It is more than curly enough to be called curly and just light enough to be called blond; it has just enough red in it to be called strawberry blond. Her eyes are just dark enough to be called incredible (instead of simply green) and she has just enough spots on her face to be called freckled (in spite of the gallons of sun block lathered on her in her short life).
See I know all these things, and more, but the kids are still giggling and I still have no clue what the joke is. You may think: “It isn’t important. It’s probably something no one over ten would find funny anyway; we should just enjoy the reflected happiness and move on.” You’re probably right; all the things I have mentioned may affect the story while their joke probably wouldn’t. But you’re missing the ramifications! I’m supposed to be an omniscient narrator in this story, and here — in the first sentence of the first chapter — something is hidden from me! This could be big trouble later. My science may not be so omni!
Anyway, in a minute we’re going to face a more common omniscient narrator problem. Rocky is going to say something and five people will react at once. You’re going to have to read very fast so that it will unfold in real time. Get ready for it. Please.
The guy pulling drinks called “two kid’s peppermint hot chocolates” and as Rocky and Al walked over to get them he asked “What is it you girls find so funny?”
Ally said “Nothing, Rocky is just reeeal weird” (missing the chance to tell me the joke). Rocky didn’t answer but made a sound half way between a gulp and a snort and started laughing even harder. As Rocky walked toward the table she was laughing so hard she stumbled (I thank she was exaggerating her reaction a lot), while Ally just followed becoming confused. When she got there she pretended to fall across the table and said (this isn’t where you read fast, but get set), “Know what that man said?”
Annie decided Rocky had crossed the line; she said “Rocky calm down!”
Rocky tried to and switched to a stage wisper. (Get ready), “But he called Ally a girl.”
Go! Amy gasped and thought “Oh God! Another poor little guy” — Annie held her breath and thought “No, Rocky, don’t do this to him” — Grace just close her eyes, took an audibly deep breath and her mind went blank — Ben thought “Hey” and said “Whaa” then went back to his meal (this might have been because of his mother’s reaction rather than Rocky’s statement) — Ally just thought “Oh, that’s all” but his glee ebbed some.
Rocky, not showing a great deal of perception, continued, “Could we pretend that he is one.”
“No!” jumped out of Grace’s mouth
Wait — hold on, that is not the answer I wanted. This is going to be posted on TG sites. She has to go along with it! But that is all I can get to work. I tried to make her agree but she keeps being recalcitrant. It comes out “well — that — might — be — be —,” or something like that. This character must have come with some back story; this may take a while.
“Roxanna, stop it this minute,” Annie said, firing the first barrel of the triple-barrel-name. It, along with a stare from her aunt, was enough. Rocky got quiet very quickly although she had no idea what she had done wrong.
Grace asked Ally to go get the other drinks “one at a time — please”. By the time he got back with the first one Rocky had gotten her talking to and she said “I’m very sorry.”
“’I’s ‘k” he replied and went back for the other drink. Rocky getting in trouble bothered him much more than anything else that had happened.
When he returned the second time Rocky continued “I really really didn’t mean to tease you at all at all.”
Ally closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He really didn’t feel teased at all at all. And he hated it when people didn’t take “’I’s ‘k” to mean “It is all right; no problem; don’t worry about it; how about this weather?” Grace wrapped an arm around her son and asked if he truly didn’t mind when people thought he was a girl.
Ally tilted his head way to the left, as he always did when deep in thought, sighed deeply and didn’t answer by saying, “Yeah, it happens, I don’t know why. I’m surprised Rocky thinks it’s weird. ‘Cuz of my name ‘guess.” Of course the guy at the bar hadn’t heard his name but we take our rationalizations where we can find them. He shrugged and added, “I mainly don’t like the questions all the time.”
Grace squeezed him, smiled and said, “All right, I’ll stop annoying you.”
He squeezed back to let her know he didn’t mean her! “Can we sit over there? Please?” he asked.
“You MAY,” she answered which provoked an eye-roll from Ally. His mother was an English professor and that was often a bigger problem for him than being mistaken for a girl. Ally went over to a big upholstered chair by the window and plopped into it. He was followed by Rocky who plopped on top of him.
A woman near by got up to leave and Annie said, “If they’re bothering you I’ll quiet them down.”
The woman who should have said, “I’m afraid they will catch me cheating at my puzzle,” said instead, “No, please don’t hush them. I have to run. Hearing your girls laugh has been very pleasant.”
It took a good, solid twenty-two and a half seconds before Rocky and Ally started giggling again. It took longer for the women’s conversation to restart. Soon Grace told the others, about the houses Ally built with his plastic blocks, about the “architectural model” of a house he got last Christmas and, in a whisper, she described Ally’s secret stash of toys. She smiled and tried to laugh when she told the story of the time, about three years ago, when she had had Ally’s hair cut very short; while grocery shopping with Ally in the cart, an older woman had stopped her and told her about a granddaughter who had had leukemia but was in remission after twelve years, so there was hope and she would pray for them; it had taken Grace several minutes to figure out what had happened. She thought, rightly, that the mistakes people made weren’t only based on Ally’s appearance or simply his behavior but had more to do with his bearing or something even less tangible.
Amy took a deep breathe before starting and said “When Annie and I were kids there was a boy —probably, girl — that lived near us, very sweet, gentle kid. When — she — was sixteen…”
“Wait — stop — please,” interrupted Grace, “I know this story; or at least I know one’s like it and where it is going …” “Please, God — Oh, Please, God,” she thought during a pause then continued, “He isn’t a sad child; shy — yes.” A giggle from where Ally and Rocky were having a technical discussion about Marco Polo tactics belied the shy part, so she added with half a smile, “at least until this morning.”
“Mine too,” Annie inserted, also with the best smile she could manage.
Grace plowed on “But not timid or withdrawn at all — yet. Not depressed.” After a pause she said, “But even surviving that symptom, there will be other social diseases to worry about…”
Annie jumped in, “Grace we aren’t talking about being gay but even so heteros have the same...”
“No, no, no,” Grace responded, “I know, I know, … that is not what I mean. I know the difference too. Maybe I should have said ‘sociological diseases’, I was thinking of the self-righteous and deadly homophobes — not microbes. They don’t know the difference or care. They’re my true fear.”
Although she felt she was getting too emotional for the setting she added after a second, “I use the term symptom for these children, I shouldn’t have; they don’t have — — My baby is not sick — nor is it a condition. He is simply different. Unfortunately some people find that difference a problem …Their problem … That is how it becomes critical.”
“And difference” said Annie, “is treated with acceptance.”
“And with love. Huge doses,” Grace nodded, “Acceptance, love and compassion when it becomes too much or harm has been done.”
Annie knew she should let the topic drop but had a pressing question, “Why were you so quick — and adamant — when Rocky asked if Ally could play girl?”
“Our rule,” Grace said “Larry’s and mine. We do show him acceptance. We always accept and allow — things. No one ever told him to hide his toys or ever would; not even his brothers, it would make little difference to them; but we won’t make him display them either. You know, when the fear is far away, we even enjoy and embrace — the difference but we won’t encourage or force anything. The ideas must come from him alone. We follow his lead and let him decide when and what and how far.”
Well — I said there must be some back story with Grace. We should step around that anvil now. Annie, however, insists on one more question.
After a moment she said, “OK. It’s a good rule. A wonderful one but are you sure Ally knows about it? Does he know what will be accepted?”
Grace was saved from answering by one of the counter help coming over with a broom, she started sweeping near the kids and asked them, “How can you’ll drink hot chocolate when it’s 90 degrees outside?”
Rocky said, “B’cuz its sooo goood,” stealing Ally’s argument without remorse. But he had others.
Ally tilted his head to the right, as he always did when he thought he was about to say something grownups would find precocious, and said, “You guys sell tons of coffee and mostly it’s hot,” he took a sip of his drink for effect and added, “aaah, it’s not just for snow days anymore.”
A few minuets later our group was on the way out; the kids were saying good-bye like they had know each other for six years rather than six hours and like they would be apart for three years instead of three hours. As they hugged Rocky whispered to Ally, “I wish you were a girl, b‘cuz you would make a good friend.”
Now that could have — and should have — really bothered Ally but it didn’t. He could recognize a friend when he saw one, so he became bewildered rather than anxious.
Since I don’t want him to react right now, just then the girl who had been sweeping called from the counter, “Wait girls, I’ve got something for you.” She handed them two plate sized cookies, explaining they were day-olds but still good and were what made all the workers fat. When Grace and Annie nodded approval, they took the cookies and even expressed their gratitude unprompted.
At the door both kids held it open for a man coming in and he said “Thank you, ladies.” All right, I admit it; I’m pummeling Grace with minor characters.
When they got outside they found Amy’s car doors blocked by a giant SUV with no way to get Ben to his seat (It was the low fat caramel lady’s car). Ally offered to squeeze in and back it out but Grace said, “Over my dead body.”
Ally responded, “Only if you put it behind the car.” Yes, that is way to clever for any nine-year-old, but Ally has two big brothers that give him material and Grace knew what she was doing when she fed him the straight line.
All this had given Grace time to consider and as Amy started to crawl across the seat to get to the driver’s side and Annie held Ben she decided to take Ally inside and fix his hair. (Got her! — maybe) When they got inside the ladies’ room, over Ally’s minor reluctance, she said “Lots of people would be surprised to see you go in the other room.” He didn’t respond, so she asked, “How do you really feel about all that, Honey?”
“I don’t know,” he said hiding a sniffle, “it’s OK when people aren’t mean and call me names and stuff.”
“Does that happen a lot to you, honey? At school.”
“There are jerks that do but it’s ‘K, I can’t make people like me; I can just be nice.” Grace knew her own mantra and Ally went on, “It’s better ’cuz I got good at soccer now. It’s mainly about my name.”
Grace knew many boys could be named Sue and have many fewer problems. She also thought it was lucky that he went to a private school known for its tolerance and with students from an educated upper-class in a town also believed to be tolerant. But she was aware things were much rougher than Ally let on. She didn’t want to push him, however, so she shifted the topic a little. “We could start calling you something different. T.K. and Jim both change what they were called at about your age. They gave you that name, you know.”
“Yeah, they liked
Grace said, “Yes, but after you were born — they were four and seven, and still called Tommy and Jimmy and you’re father was, of course, Larry — they decide that every boy in their family must have a name that ended in ‘E’.” Ally snickered, he loved hearing about silly things his great big brothers did when they where small. Grace went on, “Most Alexanders are called Alex.”
“Mom! That’s silly.” he said, “There are two Alexs in my grade and two a year up and one a year behind…”
“And they are all girls,” Grace finished. “Well, I don’t think you can do it T.K.’s way. A.H. just doesn’t sound right, does it?”
Ally agreed. She had wet a comb and then combed the water through his hair and blotted it with paper towels. Now she brought out a round brush.
“How about using your middle name?”
“You know Etta on my soccer team? Her real name is Henrietta and she has Henry on her jersey.”
She didn’t think Henry had become a girl’s name yet, but she said “The girls are taking over all the names, aren’t they? There’s a girl Tommie in your grade too. What are boys called these days?”
He knew it was a rhetorical question though he didn’t know that word. “Girls do stuff then boys can’t but girls can do boy stuff,” he said.
It was a familiar lament rather than a new topic. Grace went on, “What about just Al?”
“We’re all called Al sometimes,” Ally said, meaning all the children named Alison, Alexis, Alexandra or Alexander. By now he had noticed she was taking a lot longer than usual to brush his hair, normally it was just smoothed down in five or six strokes without even a part. He decide, since his mom was going to visit her mom, she was making a big deal out of it; he would give her her rein rather than pull at his bit.
Apropos of nothing Ally asked, “Before I was born did you hope I’d be a girl?” At least Ally thought it wasn’t related to anything and he was right as far as the current topic, his self image and, even, the mistakes in the shop were concerned. It was probably due to the friendliness his mom had shown to Rocky, not that she was ever aloof with his friends but she had been extra interested in Rocky. Of course, Ally wasn’t really conscience of this feeling and couldn’t have expressed it. Grace, however, knew exactly why she took a special liking to Rocky. It was because of the special, immediate, and intense attachment her child had made with Rocky and the way he had opened up to her, he had never done that before and she knew he was discerning and careful in such things. That and Rocky’s evident attraction to Ally were all she need to be convinced that Rocky was a remarkable person.
But Grace had quite trying to follow the connections in conversations with children long ago. “Nope, not at all,” she answered.
The droop of his shoulders said Ally wanted more, so Grace said, “Before K.T. was born I had hoped for a girl, I had a boy and wanted something different. Well, I got a boy — by the time he arrived I was perfectly happy with that — but I got something totally different too. Have you ever notice how different your brothers are?”
“Oh, yeah!” Ally said and rolled his eyes for emphasis.
“Well I had noticed that before K.T. was even Ben’s size. And by the time you were on the way I had met their friends as well and knew the variety that was possible among children. I knew, boy or girl, the experience would be something new and wonderful. And was I ever right; I got something very wonderful and very special and very unique.”
Ally smiled but then the gleam of revenge entered his eyes and he said, “Mom, you modified a — a superlative!”
It was Graces turn to giggle and she said, “I did not. I modified an absolute, which is sort of the same thing.” Then she whispered, “Don’t tell anyone — I’ll lose my job.”
She had stopped brushing his hair but now added some last touches. She hadn’t really intended to do what she had done. She had gotten under his hair with a round brush and fluffed it out. This added to the wave and it now flipped a little at the ends all around. She had put a part in the middle and brushed his bangs, which could hide his eye brows, over to each side and made them curl some. Certainly boy’s had styles similar to this, flatter perhaps, not as soft looking; but she wasn’t sure she hadn’t violated The Rule.
Just as she finished Ally tilted his head to the right, a sure sign something was coming, and said, “I like the name ‘Ally’. It’s very unique.” And he meant it too.
Grace smiled, bonked him on his just brushed head and told him to look in the mirror. Trying to follow Annie’s advice and let him know what would be accepted but not lead him, she said, “If you wish to redo it the usual way, we can.”
“Nah,” Ally said, “I’s ‘K.” But he thought, “Gaa, it looks nice.” And he meant it too.
Garlic:
“Uncle Steve! Hi You’re back What you doing Can I help Is Rocky here?” Ally said before the door had finished slamming behind him.
Steve answered, also as fast as he could, “Nephew Alex! Hi, yourself Yes, I’m back Making dinner No, she went to get a movie for you to watch.”
Ally said, “What movie is she getting? What we having?”
Steve said, “Probably something with a talking donkey. Poulet aux quarante gousses d’ail. (Read that with a horrible accent. I would have used semi-italics if I knew how.)” The door closed again. Steve hollered, “Hi, beautiful!”
Grace answered, “Hi, handsome,” as she walked in with Ben.
“You’re not beautiful, you’re my sister.” Steve said as he hugged her, then asked how she was doing. He poked his son in the nose and then stared at him and tested his grip until he heard Amy come in.
“At last. The Love of My Life is finally home,” Steve said.
Amy and Steve embraced and kissed each other, he had been out of town for four days, but Amy said “I don’t think I’m the love of your life anymore. Ben has taken my place.”
“NO, no, no,” Steve said and pointed at Ben saying “Light of My Life”, then kissing Amy again said “Love of My Life. Get it straight.”
Ally had had enough of this stuff. Kneeling on a chair by the counter he said, “What do you want me to do, Uncle Steve?”
Steve said, “Ok, OK.” He carried Ally, chair and all, to the sink then put two garlic bulbs on the counter and said, “The first step in every recipe is to wash your hands, then we need forty cloves of garlic. The parts of these are cloves and your job is to count them and peel them.”
When Ally had just got his hands wet, Amy said she was going to go change Ben and Ally lost all interest in cooking.
“Can I help, please” he said.
Amy said. “Of course, that would be nice.”
But Steve objected, “What? He’s my sous-chef. You can’t have him.”
Ally over-acted dejection so Steve said, “All right, but hurry back. Make him a giraffe.”
Amy sighed; Ally glared.
So Steve added, “If you’re going to change him, change him into a giraffe.”
Grace said, “I like him the way he is.”
Ally caught on and said, “Anything but a toad, everyone always does toads.”
Amy groaned and said, “Oh god, it is genetic. I hope Benny doesn’t develop it. I’m going to change him into a clean baby, if that is OK with everyone.”
All agreed that would be fine.
As Amy, Ally and Ben left Steve asked Grace, “How was Mom?”
“In good spirits. Who knows how much of that is drugs though. She called Ally Danni the whole time.”
“There is a resemblance; you married your brother-in-law’s twin. Does he remember her?” Steve said.
“I did not, Charity did. It was before he was born but he knows the story. I don’t know if he knows the name.”
Ally and Amy reached the nursery and he held Ben’s hand, or rather he had his finger held by Ben, as the baby was undressed, wash, oiled, creamed, powdered, diapered and dressed; handing Amy each item as needed. Then he watched as Ben started his high tea and was impressed at how the baby dug right in.
When he returned to the kitchen Uncle Steve asked, “What have you done to my wife and child, young man?”
Ally explained Ben was nursing, adding, “I was a destruction.”
“A distraction, maybe?” Graced asked.
“That’s what I meant.” Ally said.
Sounding totally exasperated Steve said, “That’s all he ever does is eat and sleep; eat and sleep and cry; eat and sleep and cry and poop: Eat, sleep, cry, and poop, over and over again, day and night.” Once he saw Ally’s concern he said, “And it is the most amazing thing I have ever seen! I mean, Ally, you were a good baby and all but nothing like Ben. All YOU ever did was eat, sleep, cry and poop. But Ben! He is incredible!”
Ally was unperturbed by the comparison and asked, “Forty groves, right?”
“
As he started breaking up the heads he asked, “Isn’t forty groves a ton of garlic?”
Steve answered, “CLOves, CLoves … a ton? Nah, six or seven ounces at most, not nearly a ton.”
Ally mouthed “cloves” four or five times before he said, “Isn’t that a lot?”
“You might be surprised,” Steve said, “Garlic is a wonderful thing — it is very different when you dice it from when you cook it whole. So you have to be careful not to squish it when you peel it, OK. I could give you a chemistry lesson about it.”
Ally wouldn’t have minded the lesson but Steve continued, “You might not like it — yet. But try it — you never know. Ben doesn’t like it so I’m fixing some plain baked chicken for Amy. There will be legs for you and Rock too.”
He agreed to try one clove of roasted garlic and a bite of the chicken; he was adventurous though he didn’t think he was. It took him a second to make the connection between chicken for Amy and what Ben liked and that raised a new topic. “How did Benny learn to eat like that?” he asked.
Grace decided it was a parent question. “That is one thing that babies are born knowing how to do,” she said.
“Are there others?” Ally asked
“That is a very deep question, Ally,” Steve answered, “people have asked it for thousands of years and haven’t got close to an answer. There may be other things. But it’s not just a science question it involves philosophy and ethics too.”
Ally had not thought it was a science question. Science was what the planets were like, how caterpillars became butterflies, things like that; not what we knew or had to learned. He pondered this and then he asked, “Does he know he is a boy or does he have to learn that? There are only thirty-nine — CLoves — of garlic.”
“What! Oh No. Dinner is ruined,” Steve exclaimed. “We can’t make Poulet aux quarante gousses d’ail with only thirty-nine cloves,” he tried to say.
A worried Ally said, “Some are real big, won’t it be enough?”
Steve exaggerated a sigh and said “Maybe, but I can’t say thirty-nine in French.”
Grace said, “You can’t say forty in French either.”
Steve stuck his tongue out at Grace which cracked Ally up. “You’re sooo lucky you don’t have a big sister, they are always picking on you. Even when you’re all grown up.”
“I’ve got big brothers instead,” Ally said.
Steve shook his head saying, “Can’t be as bad. Can’t be as bad. You’re doing a very good job by the way.”
Ally wasn’t so sure about the first part of that statement but smiled about the second. He wasn’t distracted, however, and posed his question again. “How will Benny know he’s a boy?”
Grace and Steve looked at each other and Grace tried to evade the question, “Probably he doesn’t think about it yet.”
Undeterred Ally went on, “But when will he. How does he learn it?
“Well, no one will teach him the way they will teach him to read, Sweetheart.” Grace said. Although Ally did not seem upset by the topic she was anxious for him.
“Then he just knows how to act like a boy from inside.” Ally persisted.
Steve tried his hand at not answering, “No, Buddy. We learn behaviors from watching others. People who grow up in different parts of the world act differently because of what they see growing up.”
Ally was getting frustrated; he wasn’t getting answers but he persisted, “How does he know who to watch?”
“The simple answer, Ally, is that there is no simple answer,” Steve said, “There is no on-off switch. Some women like sports and are good at them, but some people think that’s a ‘man thing’; that doesn’t make them men. Right? Even if they are faster or stronger than almost any man in the world, they are still women. Some men like — Oh, cooking, even though some might call it ‘a girl thing’, it doesn’t mean they are women. So it’s not what we like or even what we are good at. None of that makes us in to one or the other?”
He let his frustration show when he asked, “I know about bodies and sex and stuff. (Well he did at the expected ten year old level.) What makes us act different?”
Grace misinterpreted the emotion, which was unusual, and said “Come here, Baby.”
She tried to sit Ally in her lap but he just stood next to her; he wanted information not comforting. And he didn’t want to be called baby either. He did, however, let her put an arm around him. He was the only one in the room that didn’t think he was talking about himself. Believe it or not, he wasn’t considering any personal ramifications; he was simply taking an interest in the universe around him; talking about Ben learning stuff.
Steve went on, “Well I don’t think that what makes us a boy or girl is totally what body we have or just about sex and stuff. How we behave or choose what behaviors we learn must, kind of, come from inside us. Scientist can tell how the brain works and that the brain of a man works differently in some ways than a woman’s. Maybe, just maybe, that is enough; that may be the thing that determines how we choose how to act and which behaviors we learn.”
“
But Grace didn’t stop. She added, “But I think that might be like being strong or fast. Some men will have brains that act more like a woman’s than most women have and the other way around.”
I know. This is a story not a gender development symposium and these people aren’t experts anyway. But Ally is tenacious and this, obviously, has personal importance to him even if he doesn’t think so. This is what and how he learned. She’s almost done, I promise.
“But I think there is more, sweetheart,” Grace continued, “something deep inside us and I call it the soul, but some people may want to call it something else, and I think it is that part that determines what role makes us comfortable and that determines which behaviors we choose.
“That is what I think, Allydally, maybe it is something within our brain, maybe it is something even deeper. I don’t really know the answer. Is that OK?” she ended giving him a hug.
Ally nodded, he liked it when grown-ups said they didn’t know and then told him possible answers. It meant he didn’t have to always be sure either. He straightened up; he had leaned so far to the left during this discussion that his shoulder had hit the table. Some may think that Ally would ask about changing bodies to match the souls at this point but Ally didn’t think so. He, finally, had enough information for now.
Steve attempted to get things back on course, “We need to get busy! We gotta brown the chicken, toast your garlic and get this stuff into the oven. It has to spend two hours in there. Wash your hands again; we don’t know where your mother has been.”
Ally smiled at the idea that his mom could be a contaminant but the word “soul” had reminded him of something else. He had wanted to be alone with his mom when he asked it but the mood felt right right now. Unfortunately for us, it isn’t any lighter than the last topic.
“Who is Danni?” he asked.
Again Grace didn’t try to figure out the connection, she just hugged him again, this time because she needed it. “Grama’s first grand — child. Remember I told you that because she is sick she can remember things from long ago better than recent things sometimes. I was very proud of the way you let here call Danni and she enjoyed talking to you too.”
“She was in the car with Aunt Charity and Uncle Gary?” he asked, meaning Danni not Grama.
“Yes,” Grace said, once again amazed at the ease with which children can speak of the dead they have never meet as if they knew them well, or maybe it is just that we have a hard time talking casually about them. “Had you heard of Danni before?”
Ally shook his head and said, “I knew they had a kid.”
Grace asked, “How did you know Danni meant a girl, Honey?”
Ally sniffed and said, “When I told Grama about soccer she called me a tomboy. How old was she?” Again meaning Danni; Grace had no trouble following.
“Ten,” she said, “a little older than you are now.”
“She must have been sad,” he said, this time meaning his grandmother. He needs to work on antecedents. “A daughter and a granddaughter on the same day,” he added, “and you and Uncle Steve, too”
“Yes, Allydally, it was very very sad,” said Grace, this time taking him un-resisted into her lap to hug him.
Ally had more questions about Danni but Amy, who had come in about twelve paragraphs ago, agrees with me that it is time to lighten up. Her segue, however, didn’t have as strong an effect as she had hoped.
She addressed Steve, “Did Ally tell you about the fun he had with Rocky today?”
“No, but Grace did!” he said, also happy to lighten up, “Looks like you have a great new friend, Buddy.”
Thinking of Rocky’s friend statement he just shrugged and said, “Yeah,” as he walked back to the counter.
Grace was surprised by the lack of animation, she said, “I thought you two were crazy about each other. Didn’t you like her?”
He smiled and said, “She’s real weird.”
Concerned Amy asked, “But you liked her, right?”
Hadn’t he just answered that? Grownups could be so obtuse! “Yeah,” he said and asked Steve, “Want me to start the oven preheating?” Ally asked.
“Nope, can’t with the clay pot,” Steve, who spoke Child better than he spoke French or his wife, answered,… Wait a second; I didn’t mean he spoke his wife — I meant — never mind … rewrite that sentence at you leisure — when you’re done please diagram Ally’s last statement about his grandmother.
Steve went on, “The wood elf should be here any minute. We have to hurry so you can take care of her …”
Ally looked the question, so Steve interrupted himself, “Bet you a nickel you know she is a wood elf the second she walks in.” It wasn’t a sure bet, but it was a good one.
“She’s no good in the kitchen;” Steve went on, “must be a girl thing or a wood elf thing. Here, take a stick of this (rosemary) and two — three of these sticks (thyme) and a big sprig or three of this stuff (parsley) and tie it up with this (twine) and make a bouquet garni (badly pronounced).”
Grace said, “Could he make a bouquet garni (well pronounced, she had studied in
Steve’s response was to stick his tongue out again. Ally and Amy both broke up this time.
Right on cue there was a knock at the back door but it opened before any possible response and Rocky charged in saying, “Ally, Ally, Mama says we can be friends.”
All the Adults were perplexed; Ally’s earlier reserve was explained and they all knew Annie was a private person; but they did not think she was that protective in that way. Ally thought any such announcement should be accompanied by a hug and jumped up.
Rocky, however, ran straight to Grace and said, “I got to ask you something!” pulling on her arm.
While this was going own Steve whispered to Ally, “You owe me a nickel, don’t you?”
Ally smiled and nodded; Rocky was wearing four shades of green and he guessed she did that a lot. “Plus her eyes,” he thought.
At the door to the mudroom she said, “Mama said to ask you first,” then she started whispering. She wasn’t very good at it, however, and the others heard, “… bead store … friendship necklace … too … can I, please.”
Even if there had been any possible way to say no, Grace wouldn’t have.
Rocky ran over and grabbed Ally and messed up his bouquet for the second time; she said, “Look what I made you; put it on; it’s for special friends; put it on.”
Ally ripped open the bag as if it didn’t have a top and just let it fall to the floor. The necklace inside was a single string of large beads; most were wood but every fifth bead alternated between gold and silver (in color at least) with two green glass jewels at the clasp. The jewels were Rocky’s signature obviously. He grabbed her around the neck more than he hugged her. His smile said, “Thank you, it’s wonderful”, but his words said, “Thanks, but I don’t have anything for you.”
Rocky treated that objection to a gift with all the respect it deserved, she said, “Put it on; see if it fits.”
So he did, with Steve’s help. “Nice bling, Ally,” Steve said, about two years too late. Then he said, “Let’s get this chicken in the oven, turn it to 350.”
Rocky said, “You’re cooking. That’s girl stuff.”
Ally said, “I like to do it.”
Steve said, “That’s sexist. Men cook better then women, all the great cooks are men.”
Amy and Grace let that go, but it took some effort. Amy said, “Al helped me with Ben too, Rocky. You won’t do that.”
“Yuck, he’s stinky. Did you really want to? Boys aren’t su’pos’ to.” Rocky said.
Ally was indignant but only in defense of Ben, “He is not!”
Annie called from the door and came in carrying a soccer ball. The first thing she did when she got to the kitchen was sit at the table with Grace for a private conversation. After a minute she called to Ally, “Hey, we got a movie for you and Rox to watch tonight. I thought you two could watch it next door, so your mama and uncle can visit, and then you could spend the night with Rocky.”
Judging by the air under his feet Ally thought that was a better idea than a banana split. Rocky, however, looked very, very concerned. She went over to Annie and put her mouth right next to her mother’s ear; but she forgot to whisper, “But, Mama, you got real mad at Blair for spending the night with a boy.”
There are well documented times when people become so happy they cry. There are also situations — usually introduce by children — that are so inherently sad that one must laugh uproariously. This was one of the latter and Annie did.
“Oh, Pumpkin. Oh, My Love, My Love.” She said, “That is so full of misunderstandings; I’m sorry babe, we need — that’s why you were so serious when you asked if Ally could be your friend — we need a long, long talk, Sweetie. But for now; most — very important: Rocky, you may have friends that are boys; you may have boyfriends; you may love boys and men, I do!; I loved your daddy and I still do and I know you do. And with special friends you may spend the night with boys — at least for the next couple of years; but, I guess you better let the mamas talk first, on that one. OK? OK, Love?”
Rocky nodded, she felt great relief slightly tinged with embarrassment, this had bothered her for two months and now she learned it shouldn’t have.
Ally asked, “Who is Blair?”
Steve opened his mouth but Annie stopped him; she wanted Rocky to answer. Rocky stared at Al; this was sometimes a tricky point and she considered absolutely everything she knew about Ally before taking the plunge. She said, “She’s my other mama,” then remembered and added, “Use to be.”
“You have two moms?” Ally asked, his head began moving to the left.
“My step-mama.”
What did that have to do with Annie? “She was married to you dad?”
In for a penny, in for a pound: “To Mama,” Rocky said. Neither of them thought about the legal or socio-political meanings of the word, neither did the adults. The word meant that two people had made a life commitment to each other; legal privileges, property rights and the other such matters were important and unfairly denied; but they were utterly trivial in the greater, truer meaning of the word; how could people who claimed greater religious insight miss that?
It took a very short time for Ally’s head to spring up straight, “Oh, that’s neat,” he said, thinking of his neighbors who had no mom.
“They’re not anymore,” Rocky said.
“Eaw, yeah,” he thought. He had had classmates and friends who had got divorced before (that’s the way he thought of it); it left him speechless; an arm around Rocky’s shoulder was the best expression he could manage; he didn’t know it was the very best expression.
Meanwhile, Annie had mentally left the room. She had told Rocky that Blair was her step-mother for four years, but she had forgotten that in the last two months — how could she have! It hadn’t been Blair’s choice of partner that had ended the relationship; she had looked past gender when choosing her partners too; she truly loved Rocky’s father; both had known that they could not make a life commitment to each other but had decided they could make a life commitment together; Rocky was the joy of both of their lives. It hadn’t been the infidelity either, that hurt a lot — more then there were words for — but the relationship might have survived it, in some form anyway. But Annie had learned things during the crisis–of hatreds and prejudices — Blair’s apologies and explanations had hurt her case more than the act — that Annie did not want in her life, or Rocky’s. But now she realized she had yanked a parent out of Rocky’s life and did not know how to deal with it. She decided she didn’t need to — couldn’t — deal with it just now and rapidly twitched her head to bring herself back. She but a dish towel to her eyes, of course her first thought on returning was of her daughter. She asked “You OK, Rock.”
Rocky nodded; she was, though she was missing Blair right now.
Annie smiled as well as she could and said, “I was thinking, I could spread out a sleeping bags and make you two a bed of the floor. Does that sound better than Amy’s couch, Ally?”
Ally demonstrated his amazing perception and decided that a joke was badly needed, “Wait, first Amy was going to make Benny a giraffe and now you’re going to make me a bed?”
Amy yelled, “I was not!”
Steve said, “Why don’t you two take the ball and go outside for a while?”
Ally objected, “We gotta do the vegetables; I know how to break the asparagus.”
Steve said, “We have an hour before we need to start on it. Go, go, go. And we will make a good team; I know how to fix the asparagus.”
Amy said, “Oh god, Grace you’re a doctor, can’t you do something to stop him.”
Grace said, “Of course, I’ll parse his sentences.”
Amy said, “Maybe you should apply irony? Except it’s probably the result of an overdose of that? Oh no, I’ve caught it.”
The kids decided that if the grownups were going to talk nonsense it was time to leave.
Soup:
“I don’t want to!”
“But that’s stupid!”
“Is not! And Leave Maggie alone!”
Annie started to get up from the couch where she had been abandoned to watch the talking donkey alone. The kids had only seen the movie four or five times each, so it wasn’t old, but they had decided the company was better than the movie and gone off to look at Rocky’s computer family.
“Ok, OK, Be a dumb creep!”
Annie moved a bit faster.
“You’re just a bossy bitch!”
“Roxanna Katherina Forde-VanGoran!” Wow, all three barrels! Rocky had used, if not the worst possible, one of the top three bad words according to Annie’s list. Still, that is quite a barrage in Rocky’s case; I’m surprised the recoil didn’t knock Annie down.
“Get in here right now! Alexander, you too!” she added, taking it easy on the guest.
Before they covered the fifteen feet to the den the kids said, “He keeps moving my furni … It was just an ide … he messed up Maggie’s h … I was fixi …”
Annie’s stare was more effective than any screamed “Shut-up” could have been; they still said, “ But … bu .. b … b …”, however. There are times to distract, times to process and times to separate the combatants. Annie had no doubt which this was.
“Grace is coming over in a few minutes,” she spoke very quietly, “I guess Ally should go back to Steve’s for the night. You two have spent enough time together for one day” It was a vicious parental attack, pitting strong desire against strong emotion. However, it had been surgically applied; with enough possibility in the voice to not bring on tears; with enough threat to obtain absolute silence and total attention. Ally touched his new beads and moved one up to his teeth. Rocky’s thumb migrated to the edge of her lips.
“I want one of you on the couch and the other in the chair in the study. (It was more playroom/computer room.) You will stay there for ten minutes with no TV or computer. Then we will see. Ally you get to pick, you’re a guest”
Ally didn’t answer but grabbed Bucephalus from off the couch where he had been left to watch the movie and carried him by one fetlock towards the study.
“If he gets his stupid horsy I get to have
Ally silently screamed, “’Stupid horse’? — he has won battles — had cities named after him … Humph.”
“And you better leave Maggie and Sandra alone too!” Rocky sneered as they passed on the extreme opposite sides of the hall. He hadn’t intended to play with them but still thought this was unfair; Rocky was making full use of the home court advantage; he couldn’t retaliate; his toys were 700 miles away.
Once they were seated Annie went to the kitchen. She had said ten minutes and had definantly meant five minutes, but after three she decided she had punished herself enough. “You can start playing again,” she called.
They both slumped toward the hallway and each stood in the door staring at the other for an hour, or an eon, or thirty seconds. Then they both grinned: very small grins at first. Once again my omniscience fails me: I don’t know who broke first. If this were Final Jeopardy, however, I would say “Who is Rocky?”
Eventually Rocky mouthed, “Sorry,” and Ally answered, “I’m sorry.”
Rocky said, “No, I’m sorry,” her grin growing.
She was answered by, “I’m sorrier!” They both knew this routine and did it well enough for Annie to peek though the door. They jumped onto the couch and started the movie, then Rocky jumped up and ran to get Maggie and her (Maggie’s) brush.
Ally asked very, very carefully, “Can I brush her hair? Please?”
It did not take any thought at all for Rocky to hand over the doll now, but she said, “Boys aren’t su’pos’ to do that. Can I hold Bu-ceph-e-lus?”
Ally ignored the comment, passed her the horse and started to undo the doll’s braid.
Rocky asked, “Why do you call him that?” She was stroking the horse’s nose in the just right way.
“He was Alexander the Great’s horse; the greatest horse in the whole world. This is Bucephalus the forth. You can call him Busef, if you want.” Ally said, keeping his utter amazement that she didn’t know this out of his voice.
“Oh, why is he forth?”
“The second my brothers gave me when I got home from the hospital,” he said, “but when I …”
“Why were you in the hospital?” asked a very concerned Rocky.
Ally laughed, “When I was born, Silly — Mom said he got to yucky to play with so when I was five they gave me Bucephalus III — he was in a bicycle wreck and lost a leg and part of his nose.”
Rocky giggled and Ally didn’t mind, but after three years it still made him sad so he patted the newer horse’s mane. “They are on top of my bookcase. Then Jim and T.K. got me this guy,” he said. And his brothers had too: on their on initiative and with their on money and without the impetus of a special occasion. And neither of them had been involved in the wreck, either. Not your run of the mill big brothers but Ally didn’t know that; his impressions were dependant on his own experiences and they were tough on him at times. He did, however, know that it was more than a connection to his namesake that made Bucephalus so important.
A few minutes later there was a knock and Annie let
Grace in; they talked in the entry a while and as they came towards the den the
kids heard: “Rocky got that lesson in
“I hope he goes along with it.”
“It will speed things up too: unless it slows them way, way down.”
When she walked into the room Grace said, “Hello, Rocky; Hi, Dally; been behaving yourself?”
His usual answer to that was a perturbed “Of course,” this time he answered “Yeah … mostly.”
That and the incline of Annie’s smile gave Grace all the details she needed but Annie said, “Perfect angels … mostly.”
Grace said, “I’m glad to hear it … Mostly. We need to get both of you washed and shampooed. I came over to help with that. It’s an important day tomorrow. Annie and I have been talking and we thought — if you agree — we would throw both of you in to a big pot and let you get clean at the same time.”
Modesty was still, more or less, just a set of rules to Ally. Casual nudity was infrequent but not unheard of in his home, even involving his big brothers and, very rarely, his parents. But this was different…
“Yeah; know what?” Rocky said, “I went skinny dipping
in
Annie said, “I figured that when I saw the freckles on your butt.”
Rocky feigned an attempt to slap her mother: because of the mention of her dermatological situation rather than because of the mention of her butt.
This was a whole new wrinkle in Ally’s considerations; He was the Garlic-eater (he had really liked it) while Rocky only took a piece to small to see; he couldn’t be out done now; … and if all the people here were OK with it as well as everybody in Europe …
“Sure,” he said and Rocky sprinted towards the bathroom.
Annie said, “You get them started, Grace. I like to brush Rocky’s hair right after it is rinsed.”
Before Grace and Ally reached the bath Rocky was undressed, her clothes carpeting the room, and was pouring bubble bath under running water.
Grace adjusted the water temperature and Rocky stepped into the water and then jumped out and got a bucket full of naked babies and other toys from under the sink. She started launching some of these towards the tub; she hadn’t used them in years but tonight called for something special. Grace knew this didn’t bode well for speeding things along but made no objection. Just as Rocky sat in the tub Grace asked her where the washrags were, and Rocky bounce up before she could be stopped and streaked to the linen cabinet leaving a trail of water behind her.
Ally was getting undressed slowly, not out of modesty, but because he was so interested in watching Rocky. What interested him most were her excitement, which he was catching, and her total disregard of her state of dress; but there were other things too. He eventually had his clothes off and went to stand by the toilet, with his back turned squarely to the other two. Rocky called, “Hurry up, Ally,” and he shuffled across the floor keeping his thighs held tightly together. The others didn’t notice what he had done until he said, “Look, I am a girl now.” He had his genitals hidden between his legs and was surprised and embarrassed the second he had said it.
Grace reminded herself that this was something like what she had wanted and expected; she knew it had been foolish to hope for more subtlety. Rocky was more clinical, she said, “That’s dumb. You don’t have a crack there or all the important stuff that’s inside.”
Red from embracement (over his joke) Ally climbed into the tub and set down. Grace said, “It is more than that, Al,” as she started to remove his necklace.
“No,” he said.
“He’s su’pos’ to never take it off,” agreed Rocky.
“Yeah — forever and ever,” Ally added.
“OK,” Grace said, “but not in the water. You can put it back on the second you get out. It will stay nicer, and forever will be longer that way.”
Ally acquiesced.
Then Rocky asked, “Is there a way that a boy can become a girl if he wants?
“If he goes all the way over the bar on the swing set,” Ally said and both kids started giggling.
Grace had expected this question for years and had a well rehearsed answer; and now it had come from an unexpected quarter and her Ally was being silly about it. She knew she could easily duck it. But decided not to.
“Nope,” she said nonchalantly, “unless there is some kind of magic I don’t know about, and I don’t think there is — swings don’t work — then a boy can never become a girl.” She stopped and counted off her well practiced three seconds while examining Ally: curiosity only; good she was in time.
“But,” she said and paused to make sure Ally was looking right at her, “sometimes there are girls that are born in the wrong body; they just know they are because their body feels so wrong to them. And it happens to boys to; they are in a girl’s body and know it is not right.”
“It’s their souls feel comfortable doing the wrong things,” said Ally, his eyes now tightly shut under an onslaught of shampoo.
“Exactly, Allydally,” Grace said and she thought, “He digested that fast.”
It was Rocky that asked, “How does that happen,” as she flop down on her stomach in the water. She was interested but mainly she wished Ally would hurry up with his shampoo, not that he had any control over it.
“Well,” Grace said, “sometimes when the baby is developing — growing before it is born, things don’t happen like they should; they don’t always grow in just the right way. Considering all the things that have to happen just right in that time, I think it is fantastic that problems don’t happen more often. Getting the wrong kind of body is like that.”
“What other things happen,” Rocky asked.
“Sometimes minor things like the birthmark on Ally’s ankle.” Grace said.
“That’s what that is,” said Rocky grabbing Ally’s foot to take a better look at the quarter sized strawberry mark and lifting it a lot higher than needed so that he slid down into the water.
When she got Ally upright again Grace said, “Sometimes very sad things happen that make it very hard, even terrible, for the person their whole life.”
Ally said, “Hey you’ve already done it twice!”
Grace said, “This is cream rinse. It will make your hair nice and soft and it smells good. See.” She squeezed some out on to his nose then continued, “Sometimes very horrible things go wrong and the baby dies. Sometimes the doctors can fix it and make it almost perfect; sometimes they can make it easier for the person but not perfect; sometimes there is nothing they can do.”
Ally asked, “Which one is people with the wrong bodies?” Finally the questions were coming for the right place.
“Well,” Grace then answered, “They can’t move the person into a whole new body, but they can make the body something they person feels better in, a lot more like the body they feel they belong in. They change some of the chemicals inside the body and some of the outside.”
She started Ally’s last rinse and hoped no more questions would be asked, she thought this was enough for now. A question did come, but it wasn’t exactly the one she had feared or expected. She didn’t realize how taken Ally had been with seeing Amy nurse Ben.
“Can the girls then have babies and fed them?” Ally asked.
“They can’t have their own babies, Sweetie, The girl parts for that are very special, and the boy parts that help make the baby are too, the doctors can’t change one into the other. But there are babies in the world that need moms and they could adopt one of those.”
“Ah, you have to have a perfect girl body to do all the nice stuff,” Ally said.
Rocky had seen Amy nine months pregnant and coming
home with Ben, it didn’t seem so nice to her. She also thought of cowboys and
football players but those didn’t seem as nice to her as they had a year or so
ago, she wondered why. Her musings were interrupted by Grace saying, “All
done.” And then as she hung up the shower head, which was attached to a hose,
back up she said, “
So Rocky now wondered why grownups only give you good ideas when they were banning them. The two of them each washed at least one forearm before they started pouring water over each others heads, bathing dolls, making hats out of bubbles and staging major naval engagements. They each got their anatomy lesson too; un-self-consciously and unconsciously, except that one of them had to point to where the pee came out: they were simply taking an interest in the universe around them.
After they had marinated long enough for the bubbles to melt most of the dirt, Annie and Grace came in and looked for any remaining stains. Ally was removed from the tub while Rocky got her shampoo. Grace started to dry him off but he yanked the towel away. He did comply however when she sat him on the countertop and started to blow dry his hair. This was weird; those machines were only for when there was a big hurry. His hair was brushed and was softer and fuller than before. Rocky was wrapped in a towel just as Grace started to fasten Ally’s beads back on. Grace said, “I will bring your church clothes over tomorrow; I left your boxers for tonight in the entry, I’ll get them.”
But Rocky said, “Wait. Wait. I have something special for us to wear. They match. Can you wear ‘em, please?”
Annie said, “Let Ally see first, then he can decide. If he wants to wear boxers he can.”
This worried Ally but not for the reason you may think.
Grace went to get the boxers and Ally walked towards Rocky’s room the towel around his waist so that he stepped on the bottom of it. In the bedroom most of the floor was covered by an open sleeping bag with a sheet and blanket spread on top, they were fold back near the two pillows as only a mother would set up a camp. Ally climbed on to the real bed to wait because there was little room to stand.
When the others got there Rocky also climbed across the bed to get to the dresser. For some reason they both protected the bed on the floor more than the real bed. She pulled out a pair of pajamas and a nightie, both were made of the same glossy blue material printed all over with clouds. Ally was relieved; it wasn’t that he disliked green but had worried about how extreme it might get. He said, “Wow. They aren’t wood elf clothes.”
Rocky stood upright, her arms akimbo, and said, “I am not a wood elf,” angry at Steve for spreading this slander to her friend.
Ally said, in as sincere a voice as he could manage, “We know you aren’t, Rocky … It’s just you always dress like one.”
She launched on to the bed and tackled him by the shoulders. Ally cheated; he tickled her. Annie smiled as she picked Rocky up and said, “Come on, Pumpkin, let’s brush your hair in the den and let Ally make his decision or you two will never get to bed and turn into real pumpkins soon.”
Rocky but her towel back around her chest picked up her wood tined brush and slumped towards the den; her hair was curly enough to defeat cream rinse; this wasn’t her favorite thing.
Ally looked at his choices arrayed before him. Even the nightie was similar enough in form and function to the over-sized shirts he wore to bed all winter that he didn’t think of any gender ramifications. With the conservativeness of childhood and to please Rocky he took the middle course. He pulled the shorts up and allowed Grace to tie their string. She asked if he wanted to wear the top: he never wore shirts to bed in summer but both parts had been given to him and he thought, wrongly, it might be the house custom, so he said yes. Grace held an arm hole open for him but he grabbed the top — that was far enough — “I’m not a baby, you know,” he said and slipped the top on.
Grace too had had enough; he should not have said that. She said, “Oh, Yes you are!” and pulled him across her lap and tickled him, then she cradled his head in her arms and chucked his chin. “You will be my baby on your hundred and eleventeenth birthday and I will tell you not to eat your cake to fast or dangle your participles even then. And guess what, so are your brothers and I never let them forget it either.” She kissed his nose.
This was his mom at her silliest and Ally liked it (he was incredulous about that last part though). “OK, Ok,” he giggled but he didn’t try to escape.
All but six people in the world, seeing Ally, snug in his mother’s arms with his rich hair, wearing beads and shimmery PJs with lettuce hems, would have seen a girl. Grace and Larry, however, would have seen their child, contented, loved, safe, and looked no further. Jim and T.K. would have seen The Little Pest and meant only the best by it. Rocky would have seen her new bestest friend, period, and would not even have thought to ask how he had become that so fast. (Ally had asked himself about it several times and given it up as imponderable but really nice.) Ally would have seen Ally with clean hair, nothing else meant anything really.
Ally reached up and stroked his mother’s cheek, and thought this a good chance, at last, to ask the question he had been about to ask six hours before. Nothing ever slips out of this mind. “Remember Danni,” he said.
Grace twitched, embraced him a tiny bit tighter and said “Forever and ever.”
“What was she like?”
“A very sensitive, kind, brilliant, gentle, shy but friendly, joyful, little girl. A whole lot like you,” Grace replied, not really meaning to apply “girl” to him.
The only thing Ally would have objected to was little, and he almost did but decided it would be useless. “When she died…” Ally said, he didn’t like that word, “I was …” now he paused because he thought himself to mature to use the next term, but he had no other, “…in your tummy, right?”
“Yes,” Grace said, tightening her embrace again and planning her next answer, she knew where this was going.
“Do you think she — her soul could have got into you — me?”
“No I don’t, Dally. Do you know the word for that?”
“Reun-par-asion?”
“Eew, erase that!” Grace said, rubbing her knuckles across his forehead. “Reincarnation,” She pronounced it slowly, “chew it up.”
Ally spoke the word five times very slowly, moving his jaw or making smacking sounds between each time.
“Now swallow it.” Grace said.
He smiled and said “Reincarnation gulp.” They didn’t do this as much as they once had.
Grace went on, “That is another of those things that people can never know for sure, and people think different things about it. It is a nice thought, that we might meet a lost friend again, but I believe, have faith in, something else. You know I’m going to become a Godmother tomorrow, right. Do you know what that means?”
“That you can have people rubbed out?” he giggled.
“Noooo,” she said, “not that kind of godparent, the real kind. It means I will speak for Benjamin when he is baptized and that means I promise to help him grow into a good person and tell him of my faith and that I will always care about him. And the most important part of that faith, as I see it, is that we go to heaven if we have done our best in life and cared about God. That also means we are, each and everyone, a special and unique person. You don’t have to be a new Danni to be a very precious, extremely special and most unique person, Allydally.”
He pondered for a while then smiled and said, “You modified an absolute — again.”
She returned the smile and said, “I know I did. And with a superlative, too! Every once in a while, I guess, we can break some rules — of course nothing parents or teachers tell you not to do.”
“Of course, Haha.” He said and twirled the mustache that he didn’t have. He had a well developed moral sense and knew the difference between rules and Rules, as she knew.
“I guess,” she continued, “we can break some rules because it feels more comfortable in the situation. And I feel comfortable describing you with a superlative and an absolute because you’re absolutely superlative.”
Ally couldn’t follow that — would have to get back to it later — but thought it called for a hug and he held on to Grace until she said, “Let’s go see what Rocky and Annie have gotten up to.”
They reached the den just as the movie reached the fake bloopers part and Rocky’s hair got its last stroke. Ally threw the nightie on Rocky and himself on the couch. Rocky pulled the nightie away from Annie and glared at her for trying to dress her. Once the movie ended Grace said good night to all and gave Ally a goodnight kiss and a giant hug, Ally was only slightly embarrassed that Rocky had witnessed that. As soon as Grace got out the door, Annie said, “Mush, Mush, to bed hurry! It’s almost midnight!” In truth it was only 10:17, but parental exaggerations in such situations are permitted buy established tradition. When they reached Rocky’s room, Ally crawled into the bed on the floor as Annie gave Rocky a goodnight kiss and a giant hug, Rocky was only slightly embarrassed that Ally had witnessed that. Then Annie tucked them both in, fluffed the pillows and smoothed out the covers to a state that would be impossible to maintain.
Just as she reached for the light Ally yelled,
“Bucephalus,” threw off the covers and dashed to the den. Then Rocky yelled, “
Back in Rocky’s room, Annie, admitting her mistake to herself, patiently went through her ministrations again. This time she got the light off and as she closed the door she said, “’Night. Sleep tight. Don’t bite the bed bugs.”
Simultaneously Rocky from training and Ally in reaction said, “Yuck.” This, of course, meant they had to lock pinkies and giggle. But both were happy to be in bed and both meant to go right to sleep, so they rolled on to their sides with their backs to each other.
After a couple of seconds Ally whispered, “Do you always sleep on that side?”
“Yeah, I think so.” Rocky replied and so they climbed over, under and through each other to trade sides. Then they had to do it again to retrieve their totems. Once they were settled again they both intended to go right to sleep again. But then Rocky thought of a really important question. “How do you make Ben into a giraffe?” she asked and soon they were laughing again.
Annie called, “That’s strike two; one more time and one of you will have to sleep in here.”
That was unfair! Rocky hollered back, “When was strike one?”
“When you two were changing sides,” was the response. How do mothers do that?
They both said, “Shhh” at the same time but were too worried to lock pinkies again. Instead they each put an arm over the other. Rocky’s eyes closed and the tip of her thumb went just inside her lips. This was too much for Ally. He stretched out his neck and kissed Rocky right between the eyes.
Rocky giggled silently and almost only mouthed, “Boys aren’t su’pos’ to do that.”
Ally pulled his arm back and said, “Shut up, I don’t care what boys are suppose’ to do.”
Rocky lean over and kissed his cheek and said, “You shut up, I don’t care either.” She was only just pointing it out, gee. But she never said anything like that to Ally again, not ever.
Ally slowly put his arm back across her shoulder and Rocky breathed again.
Ally’s eyelids finally floated downward; he had a lot of things he wanted to think about tonight and he began with, “If I …”
All right, this sentence is going to contain a grammatical error but it is what Ally thought and I have left it alone. I don’t think any child at the age of almost ten, even Ally with Ally’s mother, would understand the subjunctive. But even if Ally did know the rule I don’t believe he would want to admit this sentence contains a condition contrary to fact. Nor would he want to use the simple present in this sentence. So, as in may other things, Ally is locked into something that some consider wrong because it is the thing he feels comfortable with.
… and he began with, “If I was a girl, I would …” That was as far as he got; there were too many possible clauses for him to pick from.
He slept.
He dreamed.
Some ordinary events in the life of an unordinary child.
I should probably say more but I don't know a better description.
Group 2: Crystal, Leaves, Ribbon
Copyright © 2006 by Jan S
Crystal:
Ally was bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet so fast that the head of the black horse, carried lamb-style around his neck, kept hitting his arm. This was exciting — he was being included!
T.K. yelled “Don’t give him any clues!”
Jim was getting annoyed with his other little brother, “Come out and listen. I’m going to use the same words I said to you! But he won’t laugh at them.”
Ally was rubbing one of the beads from the string around his neck against his teeth. He was nervous — he had no idea what was happening.
T.K. squeezed through a crack he opened in the door and Jim said, “Al, today Dr. Harte subbed for Mlle. Coen and he gave us some thought problems instead of having class. He had this one set up in screened off parts of the Commons so we could each do it alone.”
Ally knew what that meant: the Physics-Calculus teacher had babysat a bunch of almost grownups in advanced French. The Commons is what the big kids called their lunchroom. He had heard Mrs. Garcia talking to Sra. McNealy and didn't think he would have gotten a free period but he knew things were different in the big building. He bit down on the bead.
Jim went on, “Dr. Harte couldn’t afford to buy a whole bunch of glasses to use and Mom wouldn’t let me use our good glasses either, so when you see the plastic cups remember they are really very fragile and very expensive crystal. OK? And you can’t touch them: no physical contact at all.
“There is a diamond sitting on the table, it looks like a wadded up piece of paper but it is a diamond. Your task is, simply, to pick up the diamond. Give me your steed so T.K. doesn’t think Busef told you the answer. You only have three minutes; I'll set the timer then call you in,”
If, somehow, you have gotten the impression you've entered some kind of television land forget about it. T.K. isn't a petulant Wally and Ally's world isn't the Beaver's. Usually by this time of night all these people would be in separate rooms, each with one or two screens turned on in front of them. Most parental contact around here takes place while a parent is driving someone somewhere and Grace and Larry both see Jim's new driver's license as a serious threat to family unity. They do have a rule that they sit down, with the TV off, and have dinner together twice a week, but sometimes that means eating at 5:30 and scarffing down the food. Ally's still young enough that both parents try to spend time in the same room as him most nights, at least watching a show or something, but Jim and T.K. no longer take part even in that since compulsion doesn't lead to anything that one can pretend is quality time. Tonight is a rare occurrence then; born of Jim's hope of stumping his parents. If you were looking for a way to get this family all in one room, however, this would be one of your better bets.
Jim turned Ally around before he opened the door. He asked “Did I do it fairly, T.K.?”
T.K. didn’t bother to answer.
When he was called, Ally pushed the door open and walked in with his eyes tightly closed.
T.K. said, “Oh, the little dummy. There is no way he will ever get it?”
Grace almost began to root for Ally. But only almost; she recognized the anxiety that caused T.K.'s behavior.
Larry grinned and kept assembling the casserole that would be tomorrow's and Friday’s dinner; he had no doubt what was going to happen and thought T.K. deserved it and might learn from it too.
Jim said with the patience he had only learned recently, “You can open your eyes, Ally, times ticking.”
Ally opened his eyes. He saw a large cone of plastic cups built on the breakfast table with a wad of paper in the very middle. There was a single chopstick sitting on a counter.
Ally smiled; he picked up the chop stick; he bashed the cups to all parts of the room until none were left on the table; he reached over and picked up the diamond. He turned around and stated to say "Is that all?" but decided he didn't need to.
Jim gaped at Ally — Larry chuckled and said, “Brilliant” — Ally started to dance — T.K. said “Ha! Told you, he didn’t even listen.” — Grace laughed and said “Of course, we showed Alexander the Great the Gordian Knot!” (She immediately regretted the ‘the Great’ part.)
Ally was jumping up and down and throwing in a few spins as well, he said, "Na-a, I didn't think of the story."
T.K. yelled, “But that can’t be right. You said you can’t touch the cups and they were fragile and he would have broken them all!”
Jim hadn’t perfected patience yet so he sounded a bit condescending, “T.K., you noticed the stick too and he can buy new glasses when he sells the diamond.”
T. K. burst, I thought he already had but he did now, "So everyone got it but idiot, dummy Tommy. Of course, cutie-pie, sweetie, precious little Ally the Great got it; he's brilliant, not like the stupid screw-up me." Then he started to storm out of the room."
Ally crashed, not physically, just emotionally. It wasn't the words that hurt so much; he knew the difference between words as tears and words as spears; sometimes he had to remind himself to look for the difference but, at least with his brothers, he could tell. What hurt much more was that he had hurt his brother, he would never mean to do that. Also there were second collision injuries: the emotional whiplash was horrible.
Ally ran towards a different door.
Larry grabbed his youngest and picked him up as he called to his middle child, "Get back here now, T. K."
T. K. shuffled back into the room; his steps implied remorse but his face still showed anger.
As soon as the door opened Grace started, "How dare you hurt others because of your frustration. Ally did nothing to you!"
T. K. said, "I didn't hurt him..."
"What?" Grace interrupted, "Sticks and stones can break one's bones/..."
T. K. thought, "Oh no, The Poem." He was sure he had heard this before he was born.
"...but doctors can soon mend them/ words can hurt over and over again/ who know when one will forget them."
Oy; an English professor who rhymes them with them? — Well, I guess it isn't really supposed to be literature.
"Or were you going to argue sarcasm doesn't count?" Grace asked.
T. K. just shrugged. He hadn't planed to argue for a literal interpretation or a lack of physical harm. He really planed to argue lack of intent but The Poem had given him time to realize it wouldn't work: his words had been reckless where Grace saw a very high duty of care.
Larry jumped carefully into the pause, "Grace, let me go first, I'm less angry."
Grace stared at him. She agreed with the count to ten philosophy and learning to take turns instructing children was one of the things that had saved their marriage the second time it needed saving.
Larry assured her, "I'm not letting him off. I recognize his crime."
Grace asked, "Both of them?"
That took Larry almost two seconds but he said, "Yes." Then he added, "I have no idea what to do about the second though," so she would know he did know.
Larry turned to T. K. and said, "Calm down and let's analyze this puzzle."
T.K. leaned back against the wall, put his hands in his pockets and looked somewhere in the direction of his father's knees. Everyone knew that was the best indication of listening they were going to get.
Actually, at most times Larry's words would have gotten a smile from Grace; five thousand times (without exaggeration) she had thought that the people who called psychiatrist annalist should spend some time around engineers. After a few years of marriage she had met enough engineers to know that with some their analysis, and with a few their vocalizations, didn't extend beyond numbers and names of esoteric symbols. She realized she had picked one of the most verbal of the breed.
Larry, of course, had analyzed this before he had asked Grace to marry him (or rather before he realized it was too late to ask and she had already accepted). He had concluded that it wasn't the dimples she still retained or her funny navel or even the interesting things she was still willing to do with the lights out that he loved; he was certain he had met his perfect compliment: the most analytical of all possible word-persons. Even after over two decades of marriage (and learning what literary criticism actually was) he was still sure he had come very close.
Ally was still sitting on Larry's hip and tried to get down. The tension was unpleasant: he didn't like watching people getting punished; and he hated being seen by his brothers when he was this upset. Larry said, "Wait, puddin', I want you to hear this too".
T.K. said, "Of course, make him hear why T.K. is the idiot of the family. What difference does it make?"
"Just stop, T.K.," Larry said, "before I get as mad as your mother. This wasn't an intelligence test."
Grace knew she had surrendered her turn but had to object, "And no one but you has ever said or thought you were stupid."
"Oh yeah! Why wouldn't you even let me try to get into that Young and Talented Summer thing Jim goes to?" T.K. said, trying to garner some sympathy or, better yet, change the subject.
"T.K.!" Grace said with an apologetic shrug to Larry, she hadn't meant to take over, "it's not that we didn't let you: we didn't make you. You should see those tests with some of the twelve and thirteen year olds cramming like it's doctoral comps just to go to camp. I wouldn't put you through that but you would have had to prepare a little. If you had wanted it and been serious about it I know there is no way you wouldn't have gotten in but it would have been useless if you didn't want it." Grace knew T.K. already had too many options for next summer; wilderness, wrestling and drama camps vied for his three weeks' commitment; she called his bluff, "There is still time for next year. Do you, truly, want to go to nerd camp?"
Jim said, "Hey!"
Grace said, "Sorry, Jim."
"No, that's OK. I just didn't know you knew its real name," Jim said.
Larry almost laughed but hid it by saying, "Don't distract your mother when she is yelling at your brother."
Ally turned his head towards the others for the first time but kept his face partially hidden in Larry's shoulder. "She's not yelling very loud," he said, "I've heard her do lots better."
T.K. noticed the small crack in the pressure cooker opened by his brothers. He proved Grace's point by applying a lever to it, "At least she isn't talking real soft and quiet. That scares the sh- sh- geewillerkers out of me."
Ahh, the lid was off. Larry chuckled, Jim laughed, Ally giggled and Grace smiled. She couldn't help it having been called on her best and most earnest tactic.
While Grace searched for her mood Larry took over again.
Ally stretched out perpendicular to his father and a perceptive Jim passed him Bucephalus. He laid the horse over his father's shoulder and laid his head on the horse, only partly because it was to his left.
Larry said, "I examined every inch of the structure. This is what I do and what I teach others to do, T.K., but it is axiomatic: there is always one sure way in. So I knocked part of it down; not as dramatically as Ally did, I just took down what I had to."
Ally blushed; he had deliberately 'broken' every glass and enjoyed doing it.
"Jim told me he just stared at the thing until the fifteen seconds warning and then knocked it down. Maybe he was breaking the puzzle in frustration or maybe it was an insight born of frustration."
"A little of both," Jim said, then to be totally honest added, "I hope."
Recently, as he began filling out college applications, Jim had announced he had always wanted to be a "doctor". This was a huge surprise to his parents. When he was five Jim was going to build a platform above the rainforest canopy so he could be an astronomer at night and a herpetologist by day. Since then he had always had an attachment to one natural science after another (except at T.K.'s age, when it had been philosophy and theology). But his parents, watching his interest rather than his fascinations, had always believed that Jim would wind up either as an historian or a cultural anthropologist if he were doomed to an academic life (which seemed likely). They took their earnest son's sincere declaration seriously, however, and admitted it had a different quality from his previous pursuits. (Neither had even pointed out to Jim that both his parents had Ph.D.'s, that there were several more such persons on his street as well as uncounted J.D.'s and a D.D.; so "doctor" didn't necessarily narrow things down much. That was difficult because both view prevarication as high humor. They did, however, make a bet on who would learn what specialty he had in mind first; he seemed determined to keep that a secret.)
"Maybe, but maybe it was the third possibility," Larry said "T.K., I think that what happened was that Jim faced the possibility of having no answer; the one thing that scares him more than having the wrong answer. Once he didn't care if it was right or not, he could then knock over the glasses.
"Your mother did it differently. I didn't know how she found the answer until she said what she did about Ally. She found it in a story, of course. I think if her review of literature had somehow failed her she may still have figured it out but when you have read a million books they can give you a few answers."
Grace wondered if she could have solved it some other way but she felt compelled, as always, to object to the hyperbole. "I don't think I've read nearly that many."
Ally said — remember Ally; this is a story about Ally; he's still being held by Larry, "Yeah, she's only read..." he drew some numbers in the air, "73,365, one for each day of her life," and giggled; a very small giggle (the tension hadn't vanished completely).
"What?" Grace said, "That would make me a hundred and ..."
"It would be seven weeks exactly before your two hundred and first birthday," T.K. said with out looking up, "there would have been forty-nine leap years, he didn't add those in."
Grace and Larry both laughed at "idiot Tommy." T.K. had no idea why.
"Then it was your turn, T.K. You spent the entire time pacing around, and hitting the table with the stick. And you asked Jim about the rules over and over. T.K., you were willing to argue the rules but you were the one making the rules. That is what this test is about. In spite of the seventeen black shirts you own and the seventeen holes you want to drill in your face, you are the one who builds many of the walls you resent. And all the black and red and studs and rings just represent another set of rules you're willing to adopt.
Seventeen was probably an accurate number for the black shirts but ten would have been closer to the number of piercings T.K. would have liked and, to be totally fair, it was only three or four days a week he wanted them. The rest of the time he wanted to get ten varsity letters. He wasn't sure why the two were mutually exclusive but after a month of high school he knew they were.
"I thought Ally would do this but was surprised at how fast. Very early, much earlier than any little person should — ow..." Ally thought he was required and expected to make a demonstration any time he was referred to as little so he had bopped his father on the head. "... young person should have to, Ally learned to examine situations and adjust to them or, sometimes, just stay quite and unnoticed."
T.K. said, "You mean because he is so..."
"Because he is so energetic," Jim said, preserving the taboo, "but doesn't like being the center of attention."
"The point is, T.K.," Larry said, "Ally knows, and I hope he never forgets, to look for the walls to the boxes. Sometimes he accepts them and keeps himself to himself; I wish he never had to be in those places but he does. Sometimes he knows it is OK to be who he is. He might stay in the background sometimes but he doesn't deny, or even really hide, who he is or try to be something else. And he knows he can find places where he will be accepted. He always fills the box to the best of his ability.
You always see boxes and try to break them down before you know how big they are and if you can't break them you try to mold yourself to them. But there are place where you can be less confined with less fight too."
Ally had no idea what these people were talking about. He didn't think he was energetic and knew nothing about any boxes. There were places with friends where he could be happy and there were places without friends where he was quiet; some so bad he didn't want to move, but that didn't mean he was sad in those places. And there were in between places too, like school.
Larry sat Ally on the counter so he could wrap up his casserole, "Now your mother's going to pass sentence; let's get out of here, Pud. Jim, you get to pick up the cups"
Ally said, "I'll help Jim and I'm pots 'n pans."
"OK, come see me before bed, Kid," Larry said and left.
Grace said, "All right, T.K. — no TV; Video games; phone; computer, even for homework, you'll be too tempted to chat; — nothing with an on switch unless it is in the kitchen for 24 hours for each of my children you insulted. You start when you get home Friday afternoon. You'll be done Sunday."
"But I didn't say anything about Jim!" T.K. said.
"I have three children, T.K.," Grace said, "it may not make sense to punish you for punishing yourself but I have to get you attention somehow. It hurts me too much to ignore it any longer. There are other ways to deal with those feelings, Honey."
"But ..." T.K. wasn't paying any attention to his mother's reasons or sentiments and started to point out that he was going to Carl's house Saturday night to hang out (not a sleep over, certainly not a slumber party, just hang out all night like real grownups do) but he realized that Grace knew that, so instead he said, "Soccer game Saturday?"
Grace said, "I'm punishing you not the team, you can fulfill your obligations even if they are fun ones."
T.K. tried to find a way to make Carl's house into an obligation.
Jim left to put the cups away. Ally walked over hugging Bucephalus and staring at the floor. "Mom," he said, he was old enough to know adults weren't always right but was a long way from old enough to enjoy pointing it out to them, "T.K. didn't hurt me."
"Why were you so upset then, Sweetie?" She knew Ally the Defender well.
"'Cuz I'd hurt him."
She stared at her child. She had felt the same emotion and knew that she couldn't punish T.K. without punishing Ally's compassion more. "I'm going to let T.K. off, Ally, but," she got down on a knee and held Ally's chin to look him in the eye, "I'm giving you a new rule until you are about as big as Jim. In a game with younger children it is OK to let them win or if you are way ahead in a soccer game and your team stops trying to score that is OK. But, Ally, I don't want you to ever, ever not try to do your best just to save someone's feelings, especially if they are older than you or if you don't know how well you can do. Your responsibilities do not extend that far, Allydally. Do you understand?"
Ally nodded. He thought this would be the hardest rule he had ever heard of.
Grace said, "Ally, even though you care about others, you have a right to feel good about doing well, maybe more so because you care so much. It will be hard sometimes but I want you to do it. T.K., you are off for one day."
T.K. stared at his sibling but addressed his mother, "Carl's Saturday night?"
"You can leave twenty-four hours after you get home Friday and not a second earlier. Also you will do Ally's chores for the rest of the week but do it out of gratitude not as a punishment, start with pots and pans tonight. Ally, come on you should take a bath tonight."
"I don't mind doing 'em. Honest," Ally said.
Grace smiled and said, "I won't punish you by not letting you help, Honey, but the jobs are T.K.'s. Hurry though it is getting late and you taking a bath." She left to read her 73,366th book.
Pot and pans wasn't a big chore; the dinner dishes had been done and only the things used on future meals were left. Ally took the first pan and put it in the dishwasher. T.K. was disappointed to see the machine was almost empty; he liked this job when it was a spatial-relations challenge.
T.K. was still watching Ally. Ally said, "T.K.?" but got no response so he went on, "I think you're real smart."
T.K. grinned and said "You're my number one fan," and grabbed a pot.
Ally returned the grin; it's nice to be appreciated. He wanted to give T.K. a hug, or even a kiss, but that, of course, was one of those walls that he was an expert at recognizing but knew nothing about.
T.K. continued thinking about Ally: he was sweet, cute, brilliant, precious. How in Holy Bloody Hell was he supposed to deal with that?
*******
Leaves:
Ally had just finished arranging his leaves: the reddest ones on the very ends, the yellowest ones in the very middle with the ones with both colors in between. Leah had taken a different approach, alternating red with yellow and a half and half right in the center. "That's pretty," Ally said.
"Thanks, so are yours," Leah smiled.
There was a simultaneous roar and groan from behind them and Etta said, "Did you see that? That Jacob kid tried to tackle with his feet, didn't reach for the ball or cut off the angle or nothin' and Becky stood there picking her nose like a fat blob."
Ally looked over. Becky wasn't picking her nose and the new coach told her to just stand in the goal. (She was an unfortunately large child and the coach, her parents and even Becky seemed to think this was a great use of her skills. She was the only girl that got to play the whole game.) But Etta could be cruel when she was frustrated. Last year she had been the Dragons second-half goalie and had only given up two goals in the last three games of the season; those were to her best friend's team that had been down 6-0 and their old coach had never mentioned them. In fact, that score had been a bad mistake; they had always stopped trying to score when up by five. Coach Edwards said he wanted to be the first team to score ten this year. So far the Dragons hadn't scored in two and almost one half games and had given up nine goals now, two today.
Etta said, "Ally, why don't you get the ball and take off with it today?"
Ally sighed, Leah said, "We're going to be fullbacks again." Last year's coach had tried to let everyone play up front for part of every game.
Etta kicked the ground.
T.K., Carl and Gail walked over from another field and T.K. said "I got a goal, Ally."
Ally was still kneeling but stretched his arm way up to give a high-five.
Carl, who played for the other team, said, "But we creamed 'em anyway."
"It was three to two and you only got those because Gail kept giving you the ball." T.K. said.
Gail laughed and said, "I had to; the commissioner was there and she knows I know you." Gail was too old for this league and was an assistant referee.
T.K. had been selected by his dream team, the Wizards; they weren't very good so even as a first year he was one of the better players but more importantly he got to wear almost solid black (even the socks) with some red stripes and a red lightning bolt 'W' on the jersey.
Gail asked, "How are the Purple People Eaters doing? Why aren't you watching the game?"
Ally, Leah and Etta had on purple jerseys and shorts with yellow stripes and green letters. Gail was allowed to tease because she had helped coach them last year when her little sister, Jenny, had been on the team.
Etta said, "We stink."
Ally said, "Coach Edwards makes us sit by the tree 'til half time."
"Gail, look how they run around and don't pass," Etta said, "Tell Ally and Leah to help me take the ball up the sideline. Bet it'd work."
Ally said, "He'd scream at us."
Etta said, "Gonna quit this stupid team, even at practice he only lets the boys do anything and we never scrimmage. Gail come back and coach us, Pleeease. (She really knew Gail was only sixteen and couldn't be a real coach.) Leah, will you help me?"
Leah nodded but Ally said, "We're suppose' to stay on the line 'til the ball gets past."
Last spring Ally had stayed with Gail and Jenny every afternoon after school. Gail liked Ally and she liked the babysitting money and she kind of liked Jenny but she loved soccer. She had played on the varsity team as a freshman. She made Ally run up and down the block and taught him to pump his arms and lean into the run. Then she had made them dribble the soccer ball up and down the street. They hadn't had room to work on passes but Ally and Jenny had become fast and very good ball handlers. Ally had just started to hate it when his old coach noticed and praised him. Then he got the ball around T.K. and T.K. had been both mad and happy enough for Ally to know it had been for real. He had dared to play at recess for the first time after that and had begun to love the game. He still did but this was no fun anymore.
Gail said, "Ally, if they run around like that the whole game they will get tired. If you're fresh you might out run them."
Ally just shook his head; he wanted to but he didn't want to.
"Ally, the girls want to," T.K. said, "why won't you? Why are you so afraid?"
Ally looked down at his leaves.
Gail said, "Shut Up, T.K.!"
The whistle blew and Etta and Leah went off to get the juice and orange slices that were theirs by right but Ally stayed and he wasn't crying.
He stood up and kicked his leaves (but not Leah's). He was thinking of all the times that people called him names and acted like because he liked some things that girls liked sometimes and liked to play with girls sometimes he was real prissy and scared of everything and cried all the time and things like that and that they were wrong because he wasn't like that at all and he did lots of stuff just like a regular girl would do and boys too but now he was scared to do what Etta wanted and now he did even want to cry and everyone knew boys didn't. And he still wasn't crying.
So it may have seemed like a non sequitur to the others but it didn't to Ally when he said, "I'm not a sissy; that means a scaredy-cat and a cry-baby and won't get dirty and play hard and stuff and you're just an — an — an — asshole." Then he very slowly followed the other Dragons and he still wasn't crying.
T.K. hadn't really meant to hurt Ally, he was just thoughtless sometimes — often, but now he tried to defend himself and said, "I was just trying to make him braver. It's embarrassing; people get on me about it."
Gail glared at T.K., she was getting unbelievably mad. She said, "Who care's if you're embarrassed. It ain't about you, Buster. Maybe if you were brave enough your 'friends' would shut up!" Her glare now took in Carl, so he quickly agreed with her.
"You're as bad as anyone, always ragging me about it," T.K. said.
"So, I'm a jerk. What's new? He isn't my brother. When Greg said something about Zack's R problem I nearly threw him out the window." (Zack was Carl's little brother. His R problem was he never said any.)
"OK," T.K. said, "You ever do it again I'll cream you." And T.K. did mean it.
"It's about time," Carl said.
"It's way too late," Gail said, "what if Ally were your sister, T.K., would you still treat him like that?" Jim and T.K. had always been among the best at treating her the way she wanted to be treated which made T.K.'s problems with Ally that much worse.
T.K. said, "You act like I don't care about him and that's just wrong! It was the girls' idea."
"Maybe it's worse for him, what would happen to the girls if the coach got mad?" Carl asked.
"See! Even Carl gets it," Gail said, meaning nothing against Carl, "Get a clue, T.K., or do you think you should call him all the names first and toughen him up? He's already tougher than you by a long ways."
T.K. walked off towards the end of the field. Who had declared it Bash T.K. Week anyway? You know, what he said was not that horrible and he would have had to be much more perceptive than he could be expected to be to know how bad his timing was. He wasn't any where close to a bully; he was short, slight and fair, like all the males in his family and had been the target of many bullies; he worried about Ally a lot. He walked over and kicked the back pole of the goal five times; he walked to the far side of the field: he came back and kicked the pole three more times; he walked to the corner flag and knocked it over a few times to watch it spring back up.
Ally had gone and leaned against Larry all during the half time. Larry assumed he was upset about the team because that had been the topic among the parents during the first half and he was, I guess, partially right. He also knew T.K. was upset about something but didn't think the two were necessarily connected and he was, I guess, partially right. Larry tried to cheer Ally up by telling him lots of the people watching knew how good he was and to play hard and try to have a good time.
As soon as Ally got on the field T.K. called him over and said, "I did not mean you were any of those things you said, Al. I know you a lot better than that. I just want you to do your very best. Remember that rule Mom gave you the other night. It isn't just for family, you know." Ally nodded, he had no idea what that rule had to do with this situation.
Coach Edwards yelled, "Greyson get on the field or quit the team. You girls stay back there. Boys, get to the ball don't let them even kick it! Pursuit! Pursuit! Let's go! Make some noise out there. Let's go! Joe, I want to see you at the front the whole time, Boy."
For most of the next twenty minutes the soccer ball went all around the middle of the field. Where ever it went six Dragons chased it. The other team had begun with fullbacks and midfielders and forwards but as soon as the ball got near any of them they joined the pack and soon all but their sweeper was chasing all around too.
After a while Ally forgot about the discussions with T.K. and Etta and whether or not this had anything to do with what his mom had said. The ball got into the penalty area about five times, so Ally got to play then but once the ball was back near the center line he dutifully returned to his spot. Most of the time Ally spent thinking about getting feelings hurt and how sometimes with the people that you would think that would be hardest it was the easiest, and about how the leaves changed colors and how now there were only a few but soon there would be zillions and that he wished he hadn't messed his up, and he wondered what would happen if he was a witch this year even if he was a real ugly, scary one.
Then the ball and the herd came up the sideline on Leah's side. She dashed out and kicked the ball, a great kick, clear across the field. It rolled almost to a stop between Ally and the center mark. Ally charged to the ball and looked up field; there was nothing in front of him; the goalie and the sweeper were standing talking inside the goal. He took off. He thought he was dribbling as fast as he ever had. As he entered the penalty area he heard Etta holler "here" the way she had been taught last year, but that was just to tell him she was close; he didn't need her yet. Then he heard Leah, further off but ahead of the pack. When he entered the goal area the sweeper finally challenged him and he tapped the ball over to Etta. She tried to make a one touch shot and slammed the ball at the goal. The goalie made a fantastic dive but the ball bounced off his stomach. Leah was there to get it and pushed it towards the middle. Ally got to it just before the sweeper and walked it into the goal. The Dragons went wild!
At least twenty or thirty Dragons patted his back or tried to pick him up as he went back up the field.
The referee gave the Dragons three tries to do a good kick-off and the coach told them to kick it up field like in American football. As soon as the ball got back to midfield the final whistle blew. The Dragons had lost 2-1 and were ecstatic.
The coach called everyone over; they all thought he was going to tell them they had done well. The first thing he said was, "That goal shouldn't have counted and I want have players who don't listen on my team. Golden, Yo and Greyson you're suspended for the next five games (they only played eight in the fall season) and you don't need to come to practice either."
Etta who had talked most about quitting was the first to start crying. "What for? What was wrong with the goal?"
"Because you were all in the goalies box and you were offsides and the ref's just gave it to you to be nice but I won't take pity goals. And I won't have disobedient brats who give me back talk on my team," Coach Edwards said.
Mrs. Yo grabbed Etta. She said, "You as..." but stopped herself and just pulled Etta away.
T.K. shouted, "There was nothing wrong with that goal. What are you talking about?"
Coach Edwards said, "Get the hell off my pitch. You don't belong here."
Larry put the car keys into Ally's hand and told him to go to the car. Then he said very calmly, "Coach, I think we should talk about this quietly and privately."
Ally walked about five steps away. He didn't want to be a disobedient brat and he was scared and the fear was here but the zone of safety emitted by his father was here too and his Dad might need him, so that was as far as he got. He stood and watched, biting down on one of his beads.
Edwards yelled, "Greyson, I am talking quietly, you're the people shouting. I'm the coach of this damn team and I'm going to let the boys who will be playing real sports later and know how do listen get the chance whether you like it or not. It's bad enough I have to let the girls on my team. They just like showing up the boys because they get there growth earlier, I know that. (These were eight and nine year olds. That hadn't happened yet.) But putting up with that little fruit of yours is even worse. Now they've given me a reason to get rid of them and I've done it. Why don't you keep him at home in a play pen or give him ballet lessens or something."
"You leave my brother alone!" T.K. said, "You don't know anything about this game and don't belong on the same field or planet with him."
Edwards said, "Ha, I know it's a pitch not a field, Twit. So this thing is yours to too, huh Greyson. You breeding little tootie freaks?"
Ally was frozen to his spot, staring intently at his father and brother. Still he noticed that there were still some Dragons around and that several, boys and girls, besides him were crying. He noticed that Joseph Edwards was crying as hard as anyone. He felt sorry for Joseph because he thought he'd get in trouble for that. I don't know how he found time to feel sympathy for someone else right now but he did.
Larry took a slow step forward. In his head he was shouting every curse and cuss he knew but not at Edwards, at civilization; he want to be a savage for thirty seconds — three. The single step had been enough, however, to intimidate Edwards.
"What, you going to come over and fight me," Edwards screamed, "That should be fun!"
T.K. had spent less than one third as long in civilization and also stepped towards Edwards. He said, "You total idiot — you ... (he was, it turned out, too civilized to use the word he wanted to use to an adult). Go wash your hood. Crawl under a roc..."
Edwards shoved him and knocked him to the ground.
Three other fathers encircled Edwards. Even he was smart enough to know he had gone too far. "Don't run up on me like that, Stupid Punk," he said. Then he turned around and shouted, "Quit acting like a damn wimp, Joseph. Get in the car." He added much more about people telling him what to do and political correctness as he walked away but no one listened.
Several parents were talking to Larry and T.K. and as soon as he was sure T.K. was all right Ally walked to the car. He didn't know that several Dragons put their arms on his shoulders and that some moms were following him too. He got into the back seat and but his head in his lap. He noticed he was shaking.
He listened to himself; he didn't hear sobs. He closed his eyes tight; there were no new tears. He looked inside his head; he didn't feel scared now.
He was trembling.
Someone was on the seat beside him — He was on his father's lap — T.K.'s hand was on his back — His head was gently pulled onto his father's shoulder.
T.K. started to say something but Ally and Larry would have disagreed with what he would have said. Larry put his fingers on T.K.'s lips then wiped some tears off T.K.'s cheek; not the names he had been called nor his own fear nor the bruise forming on his shoulder had caused those tears. Larry put that hand on top of T.K.'s hand on top of Ally's back.
Then he showed his good analytical and verbal skills and spoke the perfect words: None.
*******
Ribbon:
Ally put the book down and waited. He was wearing a blue T-shirt that almost reached his knees and announced his participation in a 10K three years before he was born. There were some strange holes around the neck because Jim had chewed on his collars until he was much too old to do that.
Ally sat up on the bed and felt behind his head. He flipped his hair back and forth a few times and smiled. It was T.K. that had taken a red, a yellow and a white ribbon during tonight's dinner and given Ally his very first pony tail; he had escaped a bath tonight so he still had it. The loops were a lot longer than his hair and he pulled them tighter then flipped it around again. It felt neat.
He was pretty high up right now because his bed was a captain's bed with three rows of large drawers below the mattress. It was a light cherry laminate, the same color as most of the furniture and the woodwork in the room. The walls were a bright yellow he had picked himself but they were almost hidden by posters. Among the bigger ones was one of a bunch of frogs with big red eyes sitting in a tree, one of a girl in a blue dress holding a hoop, one of a statue of a ballerina, one of a big dog running very fast, one of some boys painting a fence that he got for reading the fourth most books of all third graders during last year's read-athlon and, right over the long side of the bed, one of a girl in a green dress lying on the ground looking way off the other way. Although he had this picture before he knew Rocky and the girl's hair was a darker red and she was older, Ally had written Rocky's name at the bottom of it.
The bottom drawer of the bed, which was partly open, went its whole length and was once a trundle but the mattress had been replaced with a thousand or so plastic blocks. One end of the compartment had been divided into small bins to hold different kinds of blocks showing Ally's innate sense of order. The fact that more than half of the blocks were in a pile at the other end and the condition of the rest of the room indicated either that this sense of order wasn't a compulsion or a total lack of discipline; depending on how bad it got and the mood of the parent talking.
At the foot of the bed there was a menagerie of two bears, a panda (it's not a bear), an alligator, a fluffy dog, a fox, a snowman and a skunk. They kept Bucephalus company while Ally was at school. A lot of art supplies, several robots, soccer equipment, a jump rope, some jacks (Chinese and regular), some smaller animals including some very tiny ones in their own shop, and other toys sat with the large number of books on the shelves or spilled out from a box in one corner. In another corner there was a five story model of a victorian house with a round tower. The open back was towards the room showing a montage of furnishing in its many rooms. Some of the people from the block sets, three small bears that had once had careers as Christmas tree ornaments and some other small, possibly animate, objects were engaged in various activities throughout the building. Two floppy, faded and damaged Bucephaluses (Bucephali?) kept watch from their place of honor on a top shelf.
The stairway was on the opposite side of the wall from the long side of his bed so Ally always knew who was walking up and, often, where they were headed without even thinking about it. That is why he was waiting but he was still surprised when there was a knock at the door (that hardly ever happened).
"Yeah," he said.
"Is Mister Alexander H. Greyson in," Larry asked though the door.
One day every year his father called him that but he was tolerant of the eccentricities of the old so he smiled and said, "Yes. Come in Coach Gray." Most of his teammates knew Ally's last name but they all dropped the last syllable when talking to their new coach.
Larry came in and asked, "Do you think they call me that because of my hair?"
Ally did his best to put a grimace over his grin and said, "Nah. Your hair doesn't have very much gray at all. — It's mostly brown or white."
"Oh, Thanks a lot. I feel much better," Larry said.
"Sure, no problem," Ally answered, working hard to hold his straight face, "I do wonder why you cut that hole up at the top though."
"You had just better be careful, Youngster. Special day or not, you can go too far," Larry said, a smile negated the threat.
The bed was high enough that Larry had to boast himself up to sit on it, which he did, then he asked, "All ready for bed? Teeth? Everything? — That's quit a haul downstairs. We're going to have to hire some sherpas to carry it all up."
Ally nodded to the first parts of that. As for the last, he could have argued at length that Tinzing Norgay was the first man to the top of Mt. Everest (though, in his view, that didn't detract from what Hillary had done in the least) and something like it was another annual (actually twice-annual) line so he just grinned.
Larry asked Ally what he was reading and Ally said, "It's about Maggie's cousin and the man on the train works for the judge but Mrs. Ericson won't believe her so she hid it even though he keeps acting nice and she might not get to the senator on time."
Larry had no idea what Ally was talking about but he enjoyed Ally's assumption that he knew about everything Ally knew about too much to ask any questions and just said, "Wow. I hope it works out. I wanted to talk to you about a few important things, OK?"
Ally became very serious, this would be a horrible day to get in trouble and he didn't think he had done anything but sometimes you couldn't be sure. He took a bead and touched it to a tooth. He now had two strings on but the new one, which had silver beads with a wooden one every five and had two blood red stone next to the clasp, was too short to go over his chin so the same bead still got this chore.
Larry said, "The first thing is about last week, I've been waiting until it was far enough away to bring it up but I think you might think that happened because you did something wrong and, Ally, you certainly didn't! You just played hard and did your best and that is what you're supposed to do. The coach wasn't being fair, Ally, even the parents were upset. If he had treated everyone the same and you didn't like the job he gave you that would be different but he didn't.
"T.K. thinks he made you do something that was dangerous or at least turned out badly. Do you think that?"
Ally shook his head and said in a small voice, "I wasn't thinking about that at all."
"Good. Can you remember to say that to T.K. sometime — Now, the second thing, When you get older I'm going to give you a long speech about the three things I hope you will do when you are grown up, the things that will make me proud."
Ally did something impossible for an adult; he simultaneously let out an audible groan and giggled. The groan was for the mere thought of something his father would admit was a long speech. The giggle was for the "three things". Larry was famous, or infamous, among his children for 'three things' and 'third possibilities'. They were sure he pushed things together or added things just to make the right number. Even Ally had laughed the first time Jim said that that was the only reason for Ally's existence.
"Don't worry" Larry said, "I'm only going to give a little taste for now, Puddin.' Just something I think you might need to know early. — You know you can't make everybody in the world like you, don't you?"
"You can just be nice." Ally said. He had fallen over onto his left side as soon as his father started but was staring right at Larry's face.
"That's right and the importance of being nice doesn't stop even to mean people. They probably need the kindness most. But there are people who aren't going to like you no matter what and that is true of everybody else in the world too. No one can please everyone. Some of those people, Al, are going to think that you should be like them. That you should only like the things they like, and act like they act. Don't listen to them. Ever."
"Coach Edwards," Ally whispered.
Larry was nodding when he said, "We aren't doing names tonight but there are many, Kid. When you are doing things that don't hurt anyone else, or get in the way of what others are doing, then you MUST be yourself.
"There are a lot of people in this world and we have to take care of each other. For you, for now, that means just be nice; and thoughtful and considerate. But you also must be nice to yourself. If you like doing something or find something fun. Don't listen to the people that say you aren't supposed to, I'm not talking about things that might get you hurt, you know that, right? Or people who are trying to protect you. I'm just talking about ordinary things that you do or find interesting.
"Because, Al, you must find your own joy in your own self. That is the only way you can have joy to give to others and that is one of our duties in life. Some people may be mean, stay away from them when you can, you can't always change their minds and don't need to. When you find your joy and your passion you will also find the people, plenty of people, who you can please and who want to share your joy. And miraculously those will be the very people that please you the most. That is how you will know the people that were meant to share your life.
"I really believe that the people who want to tell everyone else what they should be like are the ones that have never found their own joy. They always think others are picking on them and use it as an excuse to be a bully because they haven't let them selves be happy. Don't let that happen to you, don't hide your light, Ally...Did you follow that, Pud."
"Uh-huh," Ally said, "Do things that make me happy, 'cuz otherwise I can't make others happy and then might wanna make people unhappy 'stead."
Larry smiled and said, "Very good. I'm glad someone around here has my talent for bravity. (I don't know if he was kidding or not. I hope so. At any rate Ally didn't get it.) Now we are done with this years lecture. You relieved?"
There is not answer for that kind of question so Ally just put his arms around Larry.
Larry said, "Now I have a third thing to ask you about." Are you surprised? Ally wasn't at all surprised there were three things to talk about.
"I know about some things you have, and you know I know about them, and I know your know I know, and on and on and on; but we never talk about them. — Could you show me your secret toys?"
Ally never thought of them as 'secret', just as his 'other stuff'. He had put them away several years ago because some kids had said things when they visited but he had friends (well at least one, Jenny, next door) that he brought them out for too. Some of the small items he had even taken to school a few times. But he knew what Larry was talking about and went to the back of his closet, under all the future hand-me-downs, and got a plastic milk crate. There was also a broken cradle full of tangled Mardi Gras beads and pieces of cloth but he thought this was what his father would want to see. It was a small collection but not that bad. Every year, after his birthday party, there was always an extra girl's goodie-bag (often with something nicer than what he thought the girls had received). Also at least once a year some old things were given to charity and he always got the job of checking to make sure nothing got mixed in by mistake and was told he could keep whatever he could use. His mother seemed to have a penchant for buying presents and then finding something else she preferred to give, especially for girls.
Larry took a long, pink feather boa out and put it across Ally's shoulders; he laid out the three fashion dolls and some of their clothing; he put another boa on Ally's neck and one on his own; he took out the chests of doll clothes and the box of costume jewelry; he put a tiara on Ally's head. He went through the crate one item at a time and spread all the miniature dolls and other things out on the bed until he got to the bottom and found a heavily jeweled wooden sword.
Ally remembered when he got this sword at a Renaissance Fair but had forgotten why it belonged in this box but it did. Larry, however, could remember the drive back from the fair four years ago when Ally cradled the sword in his arm, talked baby talk to it and then hummed it a lullaby. All four members of Ally's family had broken out in laughter. Well it was very cute! And Larry was certain that not even the boys had meant it derisively. The six year old, however, had been mortified and had not accepted the reassurances of goodwill.
Larry now cradled the sword in his own arms and hummed. Ally giggled and said, "That's just reeeeal silly."
"Ah," Larry said, "but sometimes silly is fun; and cute." He stabbed Ally in the stomach then knighted him with a tap on each shoulder. He decided to test his credibility with the last item in the box. "Is this guy still called Sammy?" he asked as he took out a baby doll whose hair and face were painted on and were faded. It also had a crack or rip by its ear and was missing a leg.
Ally nodded, he was surprised Larry knew that name.
"Do you know this guy is older than either you or T.K.? I remember when Jim and then T.K. use to play with him."
"Really," Ally said, amazed either of his brothers had ever done such a thing.
"Sure, they were practicing being daddies."
Ally believed his father but most of the boys he knew now were older and he only vaguely remembered when boys did that. Also he had never thought of any of the things he did when playing as being practice (except maybe soccer).
Larry put Sammy down and asked, "Doesn't he have a friend somewhere?"
Ally crawled to the foot of the bed and retrieved another baby from under the alligator and bears. This one had real hair and eyes that closed when he was laid down and his fingers, arms and legs were easier to move. He had a paper towel wrapped around his loins.
Larry took the doll and asked its name.
Ally blushed scarlet and hid his face when he said, "Benny." It had been Sally until recently and had also reached the bottom of the crate for a while.
Larry sat the baby on his knee, smiled and said, "That is a very good name. Do you have a way to feed it?"
Ally blinked at Larry several times then remembered and ran to the closet and looked in the old cradle. He found the bottle that would change from white to pink when it was held upside down.
Larry took it and began to feed Benny. He said, "You know that gift card you have down stairs, Ally?
$50! Wealth! "Yeah."
"That is enough for one new computer game or video game. But I think ... You might — could ... Maybe ...You know you could..."
I started to go back and remove everything I said about Larry's good analytic and verbal skills just now but I think those talents are what are causing the problems he's having.
Larry finally said, "If I made a suggestion, you'd do it even if you didn't want to, wouldn't you?"
Well Duh. Ally nodded.
"Even if I just said something would be a good idea you would do it. Even though you had a good idea of your own, right?"
Double Duh. Grin and nod.
"That's nice, I guess, but it makes it hard for me to mention an idea when I want you to make up your own mind. Don't do this just because I mentioned it, OK, Al? A new game would be a good use for that money, that's what we thought you would do with it; or you might have another idea too; but one possibility would be to spend it for the kinds of things you keep in this box. The decision is all yours, Ally. It's for what you want most."
Ally was getting ready to answer right then but then he started waiting for his mom. The knock came (second time tonight, wow.) and it didn't even open right away.
"Come in," Ally said.
Grace did a remarkably good job of not reacting to seeing her husband wearing a lime green feather boa bottle feeding a doll. She said, "Someone seems to think he is too old to tell me good night all of the sudden."
Ally walked on his knee across all the things on the bed to give her a hug and say good night.
She said, "Congratulations again, My Baby. Good night."
"Baby!?" Ally said.
Grace smiled and said, "Absolutely. Did you think I'd forget to remind you of that tonight of all nights?"
Ally shoulders collapsed as he (temporarily) gave up this endless and, apparently, hopeless battle. That got him a new hug, then Grace straightened his tiara and said, "You sure look fancy but I think some things are missing."
She dumped out the box of jewelry and put a rhinestone bracelet on each arm. Then she added three link bracelets to one arm and a woven one to the other. The Hope Diamond's big brother was put on one of Ally's hands while four smaller rings were placed on the other. Two broaches and a clip were stuck into his hair. She tried to use some stick on ear studs but the goop was all used up so she had to make do with the five plastic clip-on rings she found. She asked Ally if he would prefer to have some of the rings in his nose but he was giggling way too hard to make any coherent response. She finally said, "There, that should do it for now."
Larry was feeling very uncomfortable right now because for the second time tonight he was in the rare position of not knowing how to say what he wanted to say. He settled on, "Wow. Gorgeous."
Grace said, "Now that's accomplished I need to go and scribble all over some students' masterpieces. Turn around a second, Dally." She retied the bows in his hair so they could make it through the night and said "We are going to have to make a decision soon about all this hair, you know that?"
Ally shook his head wide and fast and then rolled it around. That wasn't a response; barbers, dentist and doctors were not things he thought he had power over. Grace and Larry knew he was just having fun with his pony tail and smiled at him.
Grace said, "Remember you haven't been elected president yet so you do have school tomorrow. Good night, Sweetie. Don't let your Dad talk too much longer, OK?"
"I won't, 'night," Ally said, just as if he could do something to stop his father, then kissed her cheek.
Larry said. "Great. You come in and find a nice calm child and create a gigglesquiggle and leave me to put it to bed."
"If you want a job done right, ask an engineer," Grace said and left.
As soon as Grace left Larry said, "You're Mom's right, it's late and I've got some problem sets to look at too. Just look at this mess. Can't you play with one thing at a time?"
Ally put his chin on his chest so he could glare at his father from under his eye brows. Larry finally laughed and started to fill the crate.
Except for his necklaces and bows all Ally's finery was removed. He decided to hang the boas on his coat pegs, he got the sword and tossed it towards the other toy box; it no longer belonged with these things. He left the crate sitting beside the closet door.
Larry asked, "Water in your cup? Need a bathroom run?"
Ally was set and jumped on to the bed and started to crawl under the blanket Larry had pulled back but suddenly someone pulled his pony-tail. He was stunned and outraged until he realized that Larry was simply demanding a good night hug. That done, he got into bed. Larry placed every animal in its right and proper place and lifted Ally's arm up to put Bucephalus just right; he had to guess about Benny but got close (well, he put him on his stomach and his head was going the wrong way, but he was close). He smoothed out the cover and pulled them right up to Ally's chin and kissed Ally's forehead. "Get to sleep fast OK, it's late," he said and waited until he hit the light switch to add, "Good Night, Pud'. See you in the morning."
Ally said, "See ya', 'nite. — Hey, Daddy."
Larry stopped in his tracks. Under the influence of two big brothers, Ally had practically stopped calling Larry that until last week. Larry thought that 'Dad' was probably the harder title to earn, especially when it was bestowed by someone taller than the person addressed, as with Jim. But 'Daddy' was nice too and, defiantly, created bigger grins. If his basso profundo was supposed to make him sound stern it utterly failed. "What, Ally? It is late."
"'K, but know what Rocky's Mom says?"
"What?" still profundo.
"Don't bite the bed bugs."
Larry chuckled and lost the voice, "That is the second piece of excellent advice I have heard that came from that lady. She must be very, very wise. You be sure to follow it. OK? Good night, Sweetheart."
"'K, 'nite, Daddy." Ally said as he giggled.
Hold it. Read that sentence again — the one before that. — Larry did call Ally that. Neither of them seemed to have notice.
Ally waited again. His daddy had done a really good job of tucking-in and he hated to mess it up but he had an essential chore to do before he could go to sleep. Once he heard his daddy leave the stairs he sat up, pulled Benny over by an ankle and hiked his shirt up to his arms. He held the baby on his chest and hummed an unknown song as he rocked back and forth.
After a minute he realized Benny couldn't be too hungry because he had had a bottle earlier so he burped the baby over his arm and laid him down, on his back with his head towards the head of the bed. Ally then kissed Benny on the forehead and whispered, "Ga' nite, Sweetie. You're going to get some new clothes soon," and Benny smiled.
I know. I know, but Ally and I discussed this and we agree; Benny smiled. It couldn't have been gas, he had just been burped.
Ally's head finally reached the place it belonged at this time of night and he got himself almost as snug his daddy had made him.
I don't know what it is about '0'. But people always seem to make a big deal out of any number that ends with it. As Mrs. Garcia pointed out to Ally, none of them are really that important or interesting. They are never part of important ratios, they are never prime or perfect numbers, they don't appear in the Fibonacci sequence (at least not to the point anyone I know has computed it). The multiples of twelve have a lot more factors and the binary numbers are much more useful. As for legal rights and privileges, 16, 18 and 21 are more important than any age ending in a zero. Ally considered all this but he didn't care. He had a whole 'nother digit now!
"10!" he thought.
He slept.
He dreamed.
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Copyright ©2007 by Jan S
Before we start I have to say, "Thank You!" to my wonderful friends, Daphne and Kristina, for all their prodding, encouragement, proofreading, and much more.
Piranha:
"Yea!" Ally yelled, and he jumped into the air. I'm not really sure why he did that, and he wasn't really sure either. It wasn't that he was especially happy right then or anything; it's just that he almost always did do that -- almost everyone else always did that too -- when they went through the school door at three-fifteen; so he had done it today.
Then he remembered T.K. and Jim were getting out early today, and he wouldn't have to spend any time at all in the after-school-care room, and -- better still! -- Jody was coming home with him today. Now he was particularly happy, and he skipped the rest of the way to the waiting wall.
When he reached the group waiting for their rides David laughed, then started jumping up and down, and said, "It's funny when your hair bounces like that."
Ally stopped and looked at David. David had been nice lately, but Ally needed to think about it. He decided that David's mouth looked more like a grin than a smirk, so he started jumping up and down to make his hair fly some more.
David's back pack was hanging from one arm, so he strapped it across his chest, and though neither he nor Ally had ever seen anyone dance the Watusi, they began jumping up and down as high as they could. Alex, Leah and Austin joined in; they and Ally put their backpacks across their chests too. Although he had never seen a mosh pit, Austin started bumping and bashing into the others, who bashed right back. Jody came over, and at first he tried to stop all of them, but Ally pulled on his sleeve and he started jumping and bumping with the rest.
Soon about ten kids were moshing without music, and more were strapping on their packs. Ms Hawkins, who was in charge of the carpool line today, hollered, "OK. Knock it off! That's real funny until someone gets hurt."
David yelled back, "Yeah, then it's hilarious."
Ms Hawkins stared at him, and David tucked his chin onto his chest, turned around and scuffled away; well that was always funny when his teenage brothers said it.
The others slunk along behind David, and Alex pushed her backpack out and whispered to Ally and Leah, "Look, I got giant boobs!" then she sashayed the rest of the way. Ally and Leah laughed (and Leah blushed). Ally pushed his backpack up and walked funny too, but not for very long.
Ryan ended their giggles when he yelled, "Hey David, you dancing with all your new girl friends?"
David yelled back, "Get lost, you jerks!"
Leah might have been even more annoyed than David. She yelled, "Like any girl at all would come close to you two."
Ryan and Michael came towards the others and, in a stage whisper loud enough to be heard by almost everyone in the line, Michael said, "Look, Ryan, Ally's started growing titties. He really Is a girl," then he snickered.
Most of the kids just ignored them; Ally stared at the ground and took his backpack off.
"Jus' go away," Leah said, "Din't ya listen to Ms Chen yesterday at all?"
"Yeah; yada, yada, blah-blah," Ryan said, "We waste an hour on how we gotta be nice to people that act weird. Yeah."
Ally thought Ryan would have thought any lesson was a waste of time but stayed quiet. He wished Leah would shut up as much as he wished Ryan and Michael would disappear.
But Leah didn't. "We all like Ally and like how he acts too. It's OK with us, so why don't you stop making fun of people?"
"'Cuz I don't think creeps should be let do whatever, and regular people can't. That's why."
David jumped into it and said, "You think you're regular? People don't like what you do 'cus it is always bossing around and bugging people. That's what's being a creep, Ryan."
Michael said, "Eww, big talk from little Davina?" and laughed.
Leah said, "Gah - you's are such pains!"
David hands were balled into fists, but he tried to be calm. "Just go bug someone else, would ya'," he said.
Alex said, "Oh - Just Stop It!! Ryan, people really wouldn't mind you if you weren't mean. You can even be funny sometimes." She didn't know if she believed that or not, but it seemed like a good thing to say to stop a fight.
Just then Ms Hawkins, who was busy stuffing kids into cars as fast as she could, called out, "Ally Greyson, Jenny English, come on, your car is here." When she looked at the group around Ally all she added was, "Jody, get back with your class. Hurry, Ally."
Ally called back, "Jody's coming with me."
As Ally walked away Alex said, "Be sure to ask if you can come to my house on Thursday, Al."
Michael hollered, "Are you going to go play dollies, Ally? Awww."
Ally stopped. He took a deep breath and turned around. He said to Alex, "'K, should I bring Angie or not?" But just then Ms Hawkins called again, and he didn't hear the answer.
I know you may be wondering if things escalated to a real fight. So am I, and so is Ally. Ally will find out as soon as he can, but I'm afraid the rest of us aren't so lucky. I have no idea what's going to happen. I guess that isn't part of our story and so it's hidden from me. In a way that's good news though, because it means it didn't affect Ally either.
Ally, Jody and Jenny quickly climbed into the car. Jenny, T.K. and Jim traded hellos, but Ally and Jody stayed quiet. Rather than wait in the line to turn onto the street near the lower school, Jim turned onto a small drive, went across the parking lot behind the big building, and out the back exit. This way probably wasn't any quicker, but it had the advantage that you spent more of the time actually moving.
Both Ally and Jody kept thinking about Ryan and Michael until the car turned onto a curbless road that cut through a park, but then they finally started talking of other things. A few miles later they veered onto the left fork at a Y, and Ally said, "Pull on your ears, Jody! Hurry!"
"And puff your cheeks out, too." Jenny added.
Jody looked around the car. Why were they teasing him like this? But the big kid in the front seat was doing it too; even the guy that could drive had puffed out his cheeks and was pulling on one ear. So he went along.
The driver, Jim, said, "OK, it's safe," and everyone let go of their ears and breathed out.
Ally said, "I hope you did it in time, Jody."
"He doesn't use this road much, so he's probably safe," Jim said.
"Why do we got to do that?" Jody asked.
Jenny asked him, "Didn't you see the sign?"
"Ugh — Nah."
T.K. told him. "It says, 'Road Narrows Ahead', and there's no way to know whose head it's going to narrow."
"So you got to make your head really fat when you go on this road," Ally added.
"That's not what it means!" Jody said.
"Can't be sure," Jim said.
Jenny said, "Yeah, there was a man that used to make deliveries around here, and his head got so thin he could stick it through the mail slots in doors."
"They fired him," Ally said, "'cuz people thought he was peeking into houses. It's too big a chance."
The car pulled up to a stop light, and Ally was about to show Jody that he could blow out red lights when Jenny noticed who was in the car in front of them. "Ew, it's that little jerk, Zack Dawson," she said, "Honk the horn, Jim! Come on, please!"
Ally knew that Hannah and Josh car-pooled with Zack and said, "Yeah, honk."
Jim might have tapped the horn but just then the light changed, and both cars turned left onto a wider road. Jenny and Ally urged Jim to pull next to the other car, but Jim didn't react; he just continued to drive his usual two miles over the speed limit (that is, it's his usual when someone under fifteen or over twenty is in the car), and the gap between the cars widened. Ally and Jenny were getting aggravated, and Jody was getting excited too, but nothing would get Jim to try harder.
"You were in class with them thirty minutes ago," T.K. said.
The three kids in the back seat ignored the non sequitur and began bouncing in their seats. Jim let a car pull out of a parking lot and get between them and the Dawsons. Then Mrs. Dawson changed lanes and got even further ahead. All seemed lost when she came up to the next light just as it turned yellow, but for some reason she did stop. The Dawsons were in the other lane and a car ahead.
The wait seemed to take for ever; then a bus turned into their lane. But when the light changed the car beside them turned left, and Jim was able to change lanes and get around the bus. Both cars went through two lights; other cars got between them but all of them soon turned and the Dawsons were just in front of them again. Mrs. Dawson moved into the right lane; Jim followed. She turned right; Jim followed, but again the Dawsons were pulling ahead.
They came to a stop sign with a long line and they caught up. At the next stop sign Mrs. Dawson pulled behind the cars turning left. Jim got into the line of cars going straight and pulled up beside her!
There were only four feet and two bits of glass between Jenny and her prey; she waved her arms wildly. Carl Dawson, in the front seat, was the first to notice her. When Zack turned his head, she smiled at him and then remembered and shot a visual raspberry at him. He fired back by rolling his stuck out tongue and crossing his eyes. Ally tried to get Josh's and Hannah's attention by putting his thumbs in his ears and wiggling his fingers. Just as Josh's thumb reached his nose they heard it:
BAM!
OK - how many of you thought there was going to be a car chase AND a gun shot anywhere in this story? Come on, raise your hands. -- Ha! Excuse me while I slick back my hair.
Everyone in both cars looked around to see where the shots were coming from rather than taking cover. Then they saw Dr. Mueller and Greg limping through the intersection. Well, actually it was their car that was anthropomorphically limping on a flat tire. But who would be shooting at Greg's tires?? Oh - maybe the bang was just the sound of a blow out; I guess we will have to wait till later for the gun shot.
The cars at the stop sign had to wait while the Muellers got through the intersection, then Jim followed them into a parking lot by the fields where Ally had soccer practice.
T.K. said, "Come on, Jim! Don't stop! I don't want to see him. They'll be all right. Just go!"
"We're going to help, T.K. Just get over it," Jim said as he got out of the car.
Greg told Jim, "I can change a tire. We don't need your help."
That got him an evil look from his mother, but Jim smiled and said, "Well, you've got it whether you need it or not. At least I'm going to help your mother; I'm not dealing with you or T.K.
Jenny, Jody and Ally had followed Jim, but T.K. still sat in the car glaring at a book. Greg opened the trunk and started to take out the spare.
Ally hadn't seen Greg since he had changed how he dressed and T.K. had gotten mad at him. Today Greg had a unicorn with a small diamond for an eye in each ear lobe. He also wore a silver bracelet and a red choker that held a cameo brooch of a white flower.
Ally was staring at Greg, and when Greg was taking the jack to the front of the car he got up the courage to say, "I like you're pin. Can I see it?"
Greg didn't speak, but he bent over and tilted his head so Al could take a close look at the brooch. "It's nice," Ally said, "Can I ask ya' a question?"
Again Greg said nothing, but he looked at Ally while he turned the jack handle.
Ally looked at the others. Jim, Jenny and Jody were all over by the wheel where Jim was starting on the lug nuts. He and Greg were at the front of the car, and Greg's mom was in between the groups. He said in a whisper, "Do you think -- want people to think -- -- are a girl?"
Greg dropped the jack handle. "Shit," he said. (Greg didn't scream, and he didn't seem like he was going to be mean, but he did seem real, real mad to Ally.) After several seconds he said, "I just am me. I want to just be just me. That's all." Then he walked away even though the car wasn't all the way up yet.
Dr. Mueller came over as Ally picked up the jack handle and tried to turn it. He said, "I'm sorry. I didn' mean to be mean."
Greg's mother said, "We know. It's not your fault. He's having a hard time just now, Ally, and he doesn't know if it's a big mistake. Why don't you get T.K. to take you and your friends to the swing sets? OK."
Ally got T.K. out of the car, and when Greg saw him he yelled, "I'm not contagious you know. You don't have to treat me like a piranha, creep."
I'm pretty sure that Greg meant to say 'pariah', but 'piranha' is what he said and, since the spellchecker allows it, that's what I typed. Besides, T.K. probably would have treated a flesh eating fish just like he was treating Greg these days and with better reason.
T.K. did about the meanest thing Ally thought he could have done; he didn't even turn around; he just kept walking.
Ten steps later Ally fell back to walk with T.K. and said, "I don't get it, T.K."
T.K. said, "Neither do I, Al. And neither does anyone else either. Not Jim or Mom or Dad, but they'll just pretend to."
After another ten steps Ally said, "I gotta get something. I'll catch up."
Ally ran to his car and got a ribbon that he had tied to one of his pens. Then he walked over to where Greg was talking to his mom, and he asked Greg to help tie his hair back.
Pirouette:
Ally walked into the kitchen rubbing one eye and didn't say a word as he climbed up onto the counter top to get a cereal bowl.
Larry turned from the coffee pot, saw Ally's maroon sweatshirt, and yelled, "Field trip!"
Ally moaned and used his non-eye-rubbing hand to swat away his father's enthusiasm. T.K. came in and asked, "Why do the shrimps get a fieldtrip the week before spring break anyway?"
Grace was coming from the cellar with a jug of milk, and she answered him. "Because the weather is getting nice, the daffodils have their first buds, and the teachers aren't crazy enough to try to hold their attention. Good morning, T.K." She put an arm across T.K.'s shoulder and gave him as much of a hug as he would abide; then went over to kiss Ally's forehead and wondered why he had let the shrimp remark go unchallenged
"So why do we have about three tests everyday this week then?" T.K. asked.
Jim had come in and, as he stuck a piece of bread in the toaster, he said, "That's because your teachers are all crazy; teaching freshmen does that to people. Besides, tormenting you guys is the favorite pastime of everyone in the big building."
T.K. groaned to show agreement with that second sentence.
Grace said, "They're doing you a favor, letting you get some grades on the books before you forget it all next week."
T.K. put two splashes of coffee in a mug and filled it with milk. "But Jim doesn't have to do anything anymore." he said.
With a dramatic flare Jim said, "That's because:" then he pulled open his jacket and showed his T-shirt which said, "We're In!" and the last two digits of this year.
Larry said, "But he has less than two months until the APs. Dum-dum-duumm. Guess what he's going to be doing over spring break." Then he asked Ally, "What do you want for breakfast, Huevos Rancheros, Eggs Benedict, or this round oat cereal?"
Well, of course Larry didn't really say "round oat cereal", he just used the name but, since no one has asked me about a product placement (in spite of my plug in the last group), I'm still stuck writing descriptions of brand name products. This would have been a great place to mention any breakfast food, don't you think?
Grace said, "Eggs Benedict sounds great."
"I'll make up for it at the beach next year. I'd like some Huevos, Dad." Jim said.
Ally pointed at the yellow box.
"Don't build your hopes too high, Jim. Your college life is not going to be the stuff reality shows are made of." Grace said.
"I know. Florida will be fine for next year; I don't expect to go to Cancun until I'm a junior. I've decided not to take American History II or Calc BC; just the French, Bio and Psych."
As he poured out Ally's cereal Larry said, "We'll discuss it, Jim. If either of you wants to make one of those, I'll take some too."
"Someday Ally's going to surprise you, and you'll be trying to make Hollandaise until noon," Grace said.
"No, he won't because I'll stop offering the week before he turns twelve."
Jim said, "Where are you guys going today, Al?"
"The planetarium and then a movie 'bout the Great Barrier Reef," Ally said without much enthusiasm.
Larry said, "I really have a hard time seeing the connection there."
"One's way, way up; and one's way down, 'guess."
"The planetarium is in the same building as the giant movie screen," T.K. pointed out, and he thought, ~Duh~, but didn't say it.
"Do you need a lunch?" Larry asked, and Ally nodded.
"Peanut butter? With a banana, honey or jelly?" Larry asked, although he had already taken a banana from the fruit bowl.
Ally just nodded again, and Grace asked if he was feeling OK because he was being so quiet. Ally shrugged in response.
With a mouth full of cereal T.K. said, "I won't be home for dinner. I'm going to the mall with Carl."
Grace glared at T.K., and Larry said, "Aw, they're always so cute when they forget the difference between a request and an announcement. Sliced or smushed?"
"Sli-ushed," Ally said. "Can I take a yogurt drink too?"
"Is it OK if I go to the mall with Carl and eat there tonight?" T.K. asked and grabbed the half banana Ally had turned down from his father's hand.
Grace said, "It won't stay good out of the refrigerator for that long, Dally. You can take some baby cheeses if you like, but they will be very soft by lunch time. It's a school night, T.K. I thought you had tests all this week."
"We'll be back by eight; I gotta go get that computer game I pre-ordered." T.K. said.
Grace shook her head and said, "That's too late. Ally, I'm putting carrot and celery sticks in here, and I want you to eat them, or would you like some green beans instead? They're still snappy. Do you have your school shirt on under that in case it gets too warm?"
Ally first nodded and then shook his head, T.K. moaned and said, "Mom! I have to get that game!"
"Sorry, T.K., but the store will hold it for you until the weekend. And, Ally, change to some long pants too. I think it is still too cool for shorts."
"Mom!" T.K. said.
"Mom!" Ally said.
"Wait!" Larry said. "Jim, if you join in a couple of notes below T.K., I think we will have a major chord."
Jim was the only one to smile.
"Lots of people wear shorts all the time; Sarah never wears anything else," Ally said.
"Mom, it's a massive seller, if I don't get it before then all the good names'll be taken," T.K. pointed out.
Grace, who wouldn't have known what an MMORPG was if you spelled it for her, was unmoved by T.K.'s argument. She said, "Ally, I think it is silly to do that when it's still cold."
Jim said, "I have to be at the school 'til five, I could pick T.K. up on the way home."
Larry said, "That way you could load it before dinner and get on sooner, T.K."
Grace was the one who agreed to the offer. "All right, but only until dinner, and only an hour a day until this weekend if you have that many tests, and none on days you have play rehearsal."
T.K. sighed. When would he learn that all pleas for sympathy would backfire on him? "I only have one more test and two quizzes really."
"Is Greg going with you this afternoon?" Larry asked.
"No."
Grace said, "How long are you going to keep this up with him, T.K? He hasn't done anything to you."
"Why do you act like I'm doing something to him? I just don't want people to think I'm -- something I'm not. OK?!" T.K. said.
"What? You mean like a good friend?" Larry asked.
At the same time, Grace said, "Those aren't the kinds of people whose opinions matters, T.K."
T.K. felt like each of his parents had grabbed a horn from his dilemma, twisted it and used it to attack from opposite directions. "Look, I'm not being mean; I'm just staying away from him is all," he said.
"But," Larry said, "you are staying away just when he is going through a lot, and when he needs you most! Has Carl abandoned him too?"
"Gawah -- It was his decision, and he told Carl he isn't really gay anyway. Don't ya' see? He is just doing it because if he acts that way people leave him alone more."
"You mean people don't call you 'fag' if you say you are one? Maybe not out loud at our school," Jim said, "but Greg's smart enough to know the feelings of the worst people get worse, and he goes out in the bigger world too, you know."
Larry shot a Keep-Out-Of-It look at Jim and said, "He is exploring, T.K. But that doesn't mean he doesn't need his friends any more."
T.K. said, "So you think I should tell everyone I'm gay just to be nice to him?"
"No," Grace said, "we think you should just be nice to him just to tell everyone it doesn't matter to you. And it shouldn't."
Larry said "Look T.K., I think fifteen is very early for someone to make that kind of life decision, but it is Greg's choice. . . ."
"It's not a choice; people just know!"
"Oh, T.K.," Grace said, "It isn't so easy as that. Some say they always knew, and it is probably true in a way, but there is a huge difference between knowing and realizing or admitting."
Larry added in a softer voice, "And not every adolescent that worries or is unsure whether they are a homosexual or not is one, Tommy. My guess is that only five or ten percent of them are."
Grace said, "Hurry, Ally, and get changed, and you can't wear shoes with wheels to the museum. You know that; it was in Mr. McGee's note."
Jim laughed and said, "Looks like it's time for a makeover, Ally. Uhh, why does Ally have to change pants because it's cold and shirt because it's hot?" That got him a displeased stare from Grace.
"I was wondering about that too, Grace," Larry said.
"Because I'm a mother, not a weatherman, that's why. Hurry, Dally, it's getting late. And all of you just stop acting like I'm being bossy."
Ally slid off the counter and headed upstairs.
As the door closed behind him Grace said, "Do you think he feels all right?"
T.K. said, "Yeah, you'd think it would be nice to not have his constant chatter for one morning, but it just feels strange."
Jim said, "I don't think Ally likes going on group trips, remember that day camp. . ."
That was all Ally heard as he shuffled upstairs. He put on his maroon knit school shirt then replaced the sweatshirt, and he changed into his hiking pants with the removable legs. He planned to unzip the pants legs unless it was real cold when they got on the bus. They wouldn't be as short as the shorts he had been wearing but were still a lot shorter than what real boys usually wore.
He thought about why he wasn't excited about the trip too. He had been to the planetarium before, but it was still real neat, and the movie on the giant screen sounded OK too; some of the sharks were supposed to be gigantic and look like they were swimming right at you. He knew Josh was probably going to scream real loud, just because he could get away with it.
But still he felt weird about class trips.
Later that day, as they are waiting for the door to after-school-care to open, Jody will ask Ally who he sat next to on the bus. Ally will say, "Lisa" and ask if Jody had sat next to a girl too. Today is going to be the first time that they don't have boy and girl lines or sides of the bus while on a fieldtrip. The innovation will lead to lots of conversation and more than a few complaints, but by the trip back to school most of the students will have adjusted.
Ally is going to enjoy most of this trip much more than he usually did, but he won't really be aware of the reason. Also, the worst part will remain just as bad as ever, and although he won't see the connection, this afternoon he will ask Jody, "Don't you hate when we have to go to the bathroom all together right after lunch?"
"Yeah but I guess it's just so people won't leave the movie," Jody will answer.
"But we got to stand around by the door forever and everybody could see us. BL-yuck."
"You dummy. Everybody's got to go sometimes," Jody is going to say, "so it's no big deal, Ally. At least there's people, I don't like going into 'em when no ones around, 'cuz of weirdoes. And it's not like school where it's a good place for fights, 'cuz so many kids are there."
Ally will shrug his shoulders at that. This isn't one of his favorite topics and, though he won't be sure what the point is, he will know that Jody missed it completely. Ally isn't frightened by those rooms, and he likes it better when they're empty. If he has to use them, he gets in and out as fast as possible. He always uses the stalls too (except at school, where for some dumb reason, people get teased for that.) so he won't be seen as much, but it isn't because of what he is doing. Waiting in the line in the museum was like being seen inside that place by strangers for that whole time he was by the door, and he just didn't like it; it just never feels right somehow.
Ally will then change the topic back to riding with girls on buses, but that conversation won't take place for almost eight hours, and it is awkward telling a story in the future tense, so let's get back to the past.
As soon as Ally walked into the kitchen Grace said, "OK, hurry and get outside before Jenny's pounding at the door. Al, you forgot to take your hair down, come here."
"I'm gonna start wearing it in a ponytail to school," Ally said.
Graced sighed. "We can talk about that, but not for the first time on a fieldtrip day though, Dal."
"Why have you decided to do that, pud?" Larry asked. He wasn't contradicting Grace, just impatiently curious.
"I wanna see what happens; see if it fits in the box."
"What, Ally?" Larry said.
"Long time ago you said I was good at figuring out how big boxes were; I want to see."
Larry turned around and pretended to rinse a knife; he said, so only Grace could hear, "Sometimes I hate it when they remember what I say."
"Why are ponytails so important though, Dally?" Grace said. She got the community brush that lived with the stacks of mail on the never used breakfast table and started on Ally's hair.
Ally shrugged. Jim said, "They're a banner, when that works other. . ." He was cut off by two icy stares.
T.K. drew the same stares by saying, "There are guys that wear pony tails sometimes in my class. It's no big deal any. . ."
Ally said, "Both of the Singhs have really long hair. You know they're not brothers?"
"Which is why they wear turbans," Larry said (He was talking about the long hair part, not the brothers part. You probably got that.) We're not changing religion so you can let your hair grow, pud. Now stop avoiding the question."
"I just like it is all, and I'm tired of it mattering all the time. Just forget about it, I guess."
Jenny walked in without pounding on the door and said, "Hey Greysons, you forget we got school today?"
Jim and T.K. went outside; Grace held on to Ally's hair and quickly pulled it into a ponytail before she kissed the top of his head and pushed him towards the door. Ally tried to push the pony tail higher and make it stick out a little as he walked to the car. It was only made with a plain elastic band, but at least it was a start.
Grace called from the door, "Bye, and Dally, leave the legs to those pants in Jim's car so you won't lose them, honey."
Ally did a pirouette and waved to Grace.
Party:
Ally got to Alex's house late because his recorder choir practices after school on Thursdays. (Oh -- I haven't told you yet that he is going to start flute lessons next month, have I? Well he is. He already has the flute and everything. He has to use a flute with a curved end until his arms get longer, and he doesn't like that, but the teacher showed him how to blow across the hole already, and he has been practicing that real hard.)
When Ally arrived Alex and Leah were sitting on the den floor, already busy. They weren't here to play. This was a meeting.
Alex's birthday was the next week, during the vacation, and her party was going to be two weeks later. However, because she was having to wait, Alex had finagled a deal with her mother. Usually she would have been able to have a regular party with ten people (one for each year of her life), or a sleep over with half that number, but now she was going to have both! A sleep over for five, and five more people could come but have to leave early.
Before Ally even had his jacket off Alex said, "OK, Ally, what do you think of this stuff we have for the boys goody bags: rubber band airplanes, these stickers of sports stuff, the little men with parachutes, and either the plastic spring things that go down stairs or these balls." She showed him a catalogue picture of a super bouncy ball that looked like an eye ball with veins and blood and stuff.
"Eeww, yuck," Ally said, "but I guess they'd like those eye balls."
"See, told ya,'" Alex said to Leah.
"What are the girls getting," Ally asked, and Alex showed him he finished list: a tiny, funny looking doll with spiky hair to brush; a set of Chinese jacks; some barrettes; and a pack of five colors of glittery nail polish.
Alex barely gave him time to read the list before she said, "And here's what we got figured out to do. There's not much for the first part 'cuz we were waiting for you."
She showed him a piece of paper that had been marked off in fifteen minute increments. There was a thick line at nine o'clock, and below that was almost full with things like "make popcorn", "watch movie ??" (The question marks meant they hadn't decided on which movie yet.), "bake cookies", "ghost stories", and "pillow fight". It went all the way to one AM and still didn't have "go to sleep" written in.
The only things filled in so far in the top part were one fifteen minute period that said, "eat dinner"; another single period said, "cake and ice cream"; and the last two periods were marked, "open presents".
"So what do you think we should do when people are coming?" Alex said.
"The dancing video game," Ally answered, that seemed like a no-brainer to him because it was fun to watch too. "You want to borrow our pads, so more people can do it at once?"
"Oh, yeah. I'll ask my Daddy if he can set it up like that. Then how about a limbo contest? Would the boys like that?"
"Ya' think we could do real dancing too, or would the boys all freak, Ally?" Leah asked.
"They'd do limbo, maybe; and some might actually dance, 'guess. Who's all coming."
"Oh, so far we got us, my cousin, and Hannah, Josh, and Sara. . ."
"Better have Matt if Hannah's coming," Ally said.
"Yeah, him, but they broke up, you know."
"Nah," Leah said, "they got back together last Tuesday."
"Matt played soccer today, so they might 'a broke up again," Ally said
"Then we couldn't 'cide for the last two," Alex said.
"What about Jody?" Ally asked.
"He's to bossy, Ally," Leah said.
"Nah-uh, not really," Ally said. "He's just scared of stuff and worries all the time, but he's getting lots better. Really." Ally knew things about Jody that he couldn't tell the others, and he didn't think he could push very hard for his friend when it was Alex's party either, but he hoped she would ask Jody.
"David's been being real nice," Alex said, "and Leah thinks Brandon is cute."
"Not!!" Leah said, but her blush belied the word.
They continued like this for quite awhile, going back and forth among the sections of Alex's charts and lists. It was already dark outside when Ally said, "Are you going to have the movie about the high school guys who put on a musical?"
Alex said, "Ugh, people are tired of it!"
"Oh," Ally said, "but you can just forward to the dancing parts to dance with 'em, that's what my friend, Rocky, and I do, and skip all the dumb parts."
Leah wasn't as tired of the movie as Alex was, and said, "Know what, if we started that right after the presents the guys that had to leave would be happy to get out of here."
Everyone laughed, and Alex wrote that down on the schedule.
Just then Mrs. Adams (Alex's mom) yelled, "Your daddy and sister are finally here, Alex. You three need to get your things picked up and come eat."
In the kitchen Mrs. Adams handed Alex a bunch of forks and spoons to put on the table and asked if they had everything worked out, but before anyone could answer Alex's sister, Megan, came through the back door and dropped her backpack on the floor with a loud thud. The first words she said were, "Are they all going to be here for dinner?"
"Yes, they are, Megan," Mrs. Adams said as she placed the food on the table.
Megan rolled her eyes up to the ceiling but then said, "Hi, Leah. Hello, Ally. Ally is T.K. going to the spring dance tomorrow?"
Ally shrugged his shoulders and said, "Don no."
Mr. Adams came through the door and pushed Megan's pack out of his way with his foot.
Megan said, "Is he meeting someone there?"
"Don no," Ally said again.
"He's not meeting up with Alison, is he?" Megan asked.
Ally shrugged again, and Mrs. Adams said, "Megan, if he doesn't know if he's going or not, how could he know about his plans? Pick your books up and wash up. We're all ready."
Mr. Adams finally got his turn and said, "Hello, everyone. Hi, kitten. Have you three been playing hard today?"
"Daddy!" Alex said. (She couldn't believe he had said that. It was just such a little kid question, and he had called her "kitten" in front of her friends too!) "We've been working."
Mrs. Adams took over and said, "They have everything planned out for Alex's party. We will have to look over it later and see if we will be able to afford the house payment this month."
"We didn't spend lots," Alex said, "Daddy, can you hook up a second dance pad to the video game machine?"
"I think I can. I'll have to look at it. Is that what you're going to do all night," Mr. Adams asked.
"Nah," Alex said, "that's just while people are coming in."
Ally said, "We gotta have something to get the boys attention right away, so they don't all start playing their mini video game things all night."
Mr. Adams said, "If you haven't thought of a menu yet, Alex, what do you think of putting my special pizza stones in the oven and making a really giant pizza, and then we could let each kid make an individual pizza too?"
"Ummm," Alex said. She wasn't real sure that the others would appreciate her father's weird hobby, and building the pizzas seemed a bit like the crafts projects they had always done at little kid parties, but Ally and Leah both thought that was a great idea.
Alex was still a bit worried and asked, "Do you really think the boys would like that, Ally?"
"Sure," Ally said, "It would be neat." Not even Alex thought about how this messed up the intricate schedule they had made.
Megan had just come back and, as she took a seat at the table, she said, "I can't believe you're letting her have a boy-girl party. You still won't let me have one."
"Oh, Meg," Mrs. Adams said, "It's not like that. They aren't having boy friends just yet."
Her sisters complaint had made Alex feel very mature. She said, "Some of my friends go steady all the time."
"Oh? Who?" Mr. Adams asked.
"Matt and Hannah do sometimes," Alex said, and Leah and Ally nodded in agreement.
"And," Mr. Adams asked, "what do fourth graders do when they go steady?"
"They talk during recess and stuff," Alex said.
Mrs. Adams said, "It's just practice dating, honey."
"Matt went over to Hannah's house last week," Leah pointed out.
"Tommie said she went to a movie with Austin," Ally said.
Mr. Adams looked at his wife and said, "You said it was practice dating when Megan met up with boys at dances."
"This is practice practice-dating then," Mrs. Adams said grinning, "I think we called it being friends."
Mr. Adams flashed his eyebrows and then asked the three younger children, "Are any of you going steady with anyone."
"No!" all three answered with a barely contained sense of shock.
"Welll. . ." Alex began, but Leah quickly jumped in -- she was afraid Alex was about to mention Brandon -- and said, "Ally is going steady with Jody."
"Oh, Beee Quiet!!" Ally said, and all three giggled.
Mrs. Adams said, "I don't think that would really count. Leah, are you going out of town for the spring vacation?"
Leah just shook her head because her mouth was full. Ally said, "I'm going to visit my Grama and my blood sister, Rocky. Then we get to fly back all alone."
After Ally explained what a blood sister was and why he had one the rest of the dinner conversation centered on everyone's vacation plans and the spring soccer season.
After dinner Ally and Leah helped Alex clear off the dinner table. While they were doing that Mrs. Adams said, "Oh, I forgot to tell you, your cousin has another party to go to that night and won't be able to come to yours, Alex."
"Ohhh, shoot." Alex said.
"Don't be like that. You two will be together for the family party and will spend lots of time together while you're out of school. Besides, now you can add another friend."
"Yeah, I guess," Alex said. "'K, who else should I invite, guys?"
"There's sure lots of parties that day. Jenny's having one and Kevin too."
"Probably everyone born in March has to have it that weekend, because of the vacation and all the holydays," Mrs. Adams said. "Who do you have so far?"
Alex started counting the names off on her fingers. "Ally and Leah," she said and paused for the giggle, "Hannah and Sara, Josh, Matt. . ."
"Then we decide on Brandon and Jody," Leah said.
"One more - Umm," Alex said, "Oh yeah, ME. That's nine. Who else?"
"David'd be good. Or Austin."
Alex and Leah laughed. "I don't think my Mom would let them spend the night, Al."
Leah said, "I hope not! We already have you and Jody and Josh, Matt and Brandon for the first part remember, Ally."
"Oh yeah," Ally said and pretended to laugh at himself. He began to suggest Cynthia but decided it wasn't his business since he wasn't spending the night.
"I guess I'll ask Amanda," Alex said.
Just then the doorbell rang, and Mr. Adams yelled, "Leah, your dad's here."
Ally said, "I should go too. Bye."
Mrs. Adams chuckled at Ally's abruptness, but said, "OK. Are you walking, Ally?"
"Yes," Ally said and then remembered and added, "Thanks for dinner. It was good."
After the rest of the goodbyes Ally started on his three block trek home. He walked slowly down the dark streets, but he knew these streets well and the people in many of the houses too.
All the crocuses were completely gone, only their skinny, spiky leaves remaining. After he turned the corner he began counting the daffodil buds along the way.
He stopped in front of Mrs. Polanski's house, as he always did, and petted The Last Elm. He knew it was a plague survivor and he was lucky to know an old elm, but now it was very old even for a tree. He looked up to see if its leaf buds were doing OK, but the branches were too high, and it was too dark
He saw a real big, yellow daffodil that was already open and reached out to pick it but stopped. That would have been a very mean thing to do to a flower just for being in a hurry.
By the time he had reached his front door he had counted forty-two daffodil buds, eight in his yard, and that was only the ones near the sidewalk.
He went into the kitchen to give his report to his mother. She kept the debriefing very short tonight though, and only asked what he had eaten, if he had a good time, and if he had finished his homework before recorder practice. Then he watched the last half of a cops and robbers show with his daddy before he was sent to take a bath.
After his bath his mom came upstairs, and they read a chapter of The Phantom Tollbooth. Usually they alternated, each reading two pages at a time; tonight Grace didn't pass him the book except for one turn. Ally didn't laugh during the story, he only grinned, even though Milo was making unwarranted assumptions so he could jump to the Island of Conclusions.
When Grace had kissed him and turned off the light Ally rolled over, hugged Bucephalus, closed his eyes, and softly cried.
Ally slept.
Ally dreamed.
Group 3: Champagne, Ice, Crumbs
Champagne
"Aunt Amy, can we borrow a knife, please?" Rocky called as she ran into the kitchen.
"And some matches," Ally added, following close on her heels.
The two kids had found a surefire way to get the attention of the five grown-ups sitting around the kitchen. And even their baby cousin seemed to be watching them intently.
"WHAT?" Annie and Grace yelled at the same time; they didn't seem to know you were supposed to lock pinkies when that happened.
"Why," Larry asked calmly, "do you need some matches, Ally?"
"To ster'lize the knife," Ally answered.
"OooK," Larry said, "and what are you going to do with a sterile knife?"
"Cut our wrists," Rocky answered matter of factly.
"We're gonna 'come blood brothers," Ally informed them, his head tilted all the way to the right, a grin on his face.
"Ahh, I see. — T.K.," Larry said, the last two syllables about three times as loud as the rest.
T.K. walked in laughing; he was pretty sure this wasn't real trouble.
Jim came too, just to watch, and did a quick survey of the room. His mother and Rocky's mother were unreadable, but they weren't mad. His father was trying hard not to show he was amused, while his Uncle Steve didn't care if his amusement showed or not. His Aunt Amy was feeding the baby, and he couldn't see her face. His cousin, Benny, was very amused, but since his face was covered in green goop and he was six months old, that probably didn't matter. Ally and Rocky seemed befuddled and expectant, but that wasn't unusual.
T.K. said, "Hey, I did tell them to ask you for the knife and to sterilize it. It's Jim's fault; he told them they weren't really cousins."
"You don't need quite that much blood," Steve said as he got up and left the room.
Ally's head swung like a pendulum to the other side and he asked, "If Uncle Steve and Aunt Amy are both our aunt an’ uncle, why aren' we?"
Grace said, "Cousin means you have at least one grandparent in common, but you two don't have to be related to be very special friends, and that is just as important as being cousins, even much more important."
"But we want to be!" Rocky said, "Aren' we even second cousins?"
Steve came back carrying a bottle of rubbing alcohol, cotton balls and a small needle as Amy explained, "Second and third cousins refer to different generations. When either one of you has kids and Ben has kids, they will be each other's second cousins."
Grace said, "Steve, you're not actually going to do this to them!"
"Sure I am," Steve said, "You're not actually going to argue symbolism isn't important, are you, Grace? Go ahead, I dare ya'."
Grace was routed by that argument, so she said, "Go and wash your hands really, really well."
As Steve poured the alcohol over the needle in a saucer, Annie asked, "Are you both very sure about this? It's going to hurt, you know."
Both kids nodded vehemently and yelled "Yeah!" from the sink.
T.K. asked, "What about removed, like first cousins once removed? Is that what they are?"
"No," Amy said, "Removed refers to being of different generations, Ben's kids will be your first cousins once removed and you theirs. Your grandchildren will be his first cousins twice removed and so on. That's expert legal advice for free; I was in Wills and Estates before I learned that."
Larry said, "I think T.K. should do the honors; that way when their fingers get infected and fall off, they'll blame the right person."
"No," Grace said. T.K. was both hurt and relieved by her lack of faith.
Unfortunately, he was immediately pleased and distressed by Annie. "Grace, I think T.K. would be just perfect to perform this ceremony. I can't imagine a better officiator," she said.
Steve said, "T.K., wipe their fingers with alcohol first, and do them quickly so they don't have to keep the blood going."
"And not very deeply at all," Grace added, "we don't need a fountain."
"OK, guys," T.K. said, "Come on over here, and I'll make you blood brothers." Nervous about stabbing people or not, he was determined to seem confident and to play the role to the hilt.
Rocky put her right arm across Ally's shoulder, suddenly anxious now that it was about to happen. Ally's tell-tale bead was between his teeth, and he put his left arm across Rocky.
Rocky said, "Shouldn' we be blood sisters 'cus I'm a girl or something?"
"You can have blood sisters too, I think." Jim said.
"Blood cousins." offered Steve.
"Blood siblings," said Amy.
"Blood sisters is best," Rocky said. "It's easier t' 'splain."
"'K," said Ally.
T.K. asked, "Both blood sisters, Ally?"
"Uh-hah, it's better, 'guess, 'cuz Rocky's a girl," Ally said.
"All right, put your hands on the table." T.K. said, "No, your left hand, Al. It's closer to your heart." He appreciated symbolism too it seems. Ally put his right hand on top of Rocky's rather than replace the bead.
T.K. said, "After I poke you, squeeze it with your thumb to get a drop of blood out, like this. Then lock your fingers, make sure the bloody parts touch, and pull real hard, like this, and say…."
"Forever," Jim suggested.
T.K. said, "Forever, three times slowly: forever...forever...forever. Right together or it doesn't take. OK?"
Both kids nodded nervously.
"Dearly Belove-id," T.K. intoned, "We are gather-id here today to join this Ally and this Rocky in the bless-id state of Blood Sisterhoodliness...."
"Get on with it, Ham," Larry interrupted, mildly amused.
"OK, close your eyes real tight and get ready."
They were jabbed and both giggled instead of screaming — nurses hurt a lot more. Grown-ups were such scaredy-cats.
"F-f-forever...f-forever...f-forever," they said just right together. They appreciated symbolism too, it seems; they did feel different and special. They threw their arms around each other and got a round of applause.
Ally gave T.K. a big hug too and kissed his cheek even. T.K. didn't sometimes mind that as much kinda as he used to. Then Rocky did the same and T.K. blushed; then he blushed twice as much because he had blushed.
"We should do it for Maggie and Angie!" Rocky said.
"I can't do that," T.K. said, "dolls got no blood."
Ally and Rocky looked at each other, then at the ceiling. Some people just never get it, do they?
Ally said, "They're cousins already anyway."
Annie said, "Put some alcohol on your fingers again, and then I have good news and bad news. Which do you want first?"
"Good!" Rocky said and Ally nodded.
"Lisa's mama called and asked you two to come over for lunch. Or I should say you four; Maggie and Angie were specifically included."
"Is Cynthia coming too?" Rocky asked, very excited.
"That was the plan, I think," Annie answered.
"That means Rose will be there too. It'll be an Appleby fam'ly 'union!"
"You mean the other has Johanna? Cooool!" Ally said.
Jim said, "There's going to be eight of you in one house! Wow!"
Rocky threw her head back and her hands up. Ally slumped over the table. How was one supposed to deal with such ignorance?
Ally said, "You knooow who Maggie and Angie are, and Rose and Johanna are their other cousins."
"Yeah, Jim," Annie said, "the Appleby cousins are famous. They live in the 1890's, in all different parts of the country, and they have adventures and have books written about them. And still they will come and live with you if you want them to. How can you be so ill informed?"
"Unfortunately," Larry said, "when they move in with you, they bring a thick catalog of things for your parents to buy for them."
Rocky decided these people were getting close to teasing. She said, "Is it time to go yet?"
Ally turned to Rocky and said, "You know what we could do?"
Grace jumped in and said, "Wait, Ally, the bad news — you have to be back by two-thirty for some serious downtime."
Annie said, "Rocky, that means totally quiet time, understood?"
Ally didn't let Rocky answer. "Maybe we can have a New Year's Eve party with all the Applebys."
Annie sighed and said, "Rocky, did you understand me?"
Rocky said, "Yeah. Can we go now? We can take their nightgo...."
"Slow down, you two," Larry said, "and pay attention."
Uh-oh, those words never preceded anything good, and they noticed they were being tag-teamed too. These people had obviously been plotting something behind their backs.
"I want this clear now," Grace said. "If you're going to stay up until midnight tonight, you're going to spend an hour and a half on the bed reading and doing quiet things this afternoon."
"'K, 'K," Ally said, that was all way to far away to worry about now.
"We haven't got to the worst part," Annie said as she wrapped an arm around Rocky. "Rocky is going to be at home and, Ally, you will be upstairs over here for that time."
"WHAA!" Shock! Abhorrence! Heresy! Anathema!
"Either that or go to bed at the regular time tonight," Larry said. "At two o'clock today, you will have been here for seventy-two hours, Ally, and, except for your visits to Grama, almost every second of that you have been with Rock. You two sleep together, dress together, wash together, brush your teeth together. Do you even go to the bathroom together?"
Ally and Rocky blushed and almost giggled; they had only done that twice, but weren't about to discuss it in public.
"I'm certain ninety minutes apart won't cause your ears to fall off," Larry finished.
But could he be totally sure, just because it had never happened before? Ally and Rocky looked at each other. They were outnumbered by much larger foes. Eventually they decided, either by telepathy or empathy, that that was a long time away, and the sky might fall first or, although it was far less likely, the grownups might see reason and change their minds. So they would go along with it for now.
Ally said with great sadness, "While 'm gone, can ya' bring Bucephalus over an' my little 'corder an' Benny and his new...."
Larry said, "While you're getting the dolls, put the things you absolutely need for those ninety minutes in Annie's entry. I'll get Steve's wheelbarrow and bring them over."
Rocky asked, "When do we get to go?"
Annie said, "By the time you get all ready, it won't be totally ridiculously early."
Rocky had her coat on by the end of that sentence and was moving to the back door as she said, "Mama, can you call Cynthia and 'mind her to bring Rose' ni'go'n. Maggie can wear her new blue dress and her hair in a French brai..."
Ally followed doing the counterpoint, "They need to take their dolls too. I'll put Angie in her dress with the pearl buttons and her buckl...."
The door closed on the last words of both parts, but Annie answered the air, "The number is written down next door, and you are big enough to use the phone, but she will probably bring it anyway. Bye, My Love."
Larry said, "Have fun, Puddin'."
Grace added, "See you at two-thirty. I love you."
Jim and T.K. both laughed at these signs of early onset senility.
The stop next door took much longer than either Rocky or Ally had expected. Maggie and Angie had to be completely changed, and in their case that meant new bloomers and two new petticoats each, as well as new dresses, and then both had to have their hair fixed. (Things that neither Grace nor Annie would have dared try with their dolls.)
Ally had to find his new copy of The Book of Three (He had read it before, but never in a hard cover!) and put it in the entry. Benny (Ally's Benny, not Amy's) and two changes of his clothes and his bottle also had to be placed in the entry, along with Bucephalus and Ally's alto recorder (He had a tenor one too, but hadn't learned the fingering for it yet.) and music books. Ally's backpack had to be emptied in order to carry the things Maggie and Angie were going to need.
Then disaster struck: Maggie had misplaced her doll! The study and Rocky's room were ransacked in the search before she was found visiting three girls that were her height and were in a rock and roll band together. Then the two rooms were half unransacked, out of fear, I think, but it might have been consideration.
Finally, they dashed out, without gloves and with hoods down, into the almost January Midwest.
All right. Now I'm going to take a bit of revenge on screenwriters, playwrights and directors everywhere. You know, they never have to explain settings or describe rooms; they don't have to give details of appearance or clothing; movements, entrances and exits seldom have to be addressed at all. Of course, I draw attention to certain items by just mentioning them, but for creators of visual narratives all that is unimportant. Those things are only discussed with grips, gaffers and other lackeys, and then it all blends together in a general background texture.
So, we are going to move down the street, without a pan or a fade or a dolly truck, and continue this story and, since this will all blend together in Ally's memory, it remains a single scene for us. Try that Opie, I mean Howard. And while we're on the topic, how would you handle a string of sub-vocalized thoughts, Spielberg? You guys don't even like soliloquies anymore.
"Thus with imagined wing our swift scene flies in motion of no less celerity than that of thought...Play with your fancies and in them behold...a city on th' inconstant billows dancing, for so appears this fleet majestical holding due course to Harfleur. Follow, Follow! ...to France."
Or at least to Lisa's house, five doors down the street.
Ally and Rocky reached Lisa's walk hand and hand at the end of a noncompetitive skipping contest but, as they started up the walk, Ally suddenly got much slower than Rocky. Annie must have foreseen the troubles getting ready, because while they weren't totally ridiculously early, they were slightly ridiculously early. However, they were close enough to the right time for Lisa to open the door before they got to the porch.
"Hi, Rocky. Hi, Maggie. Hi, Angie," Lisa called from the door.
"Hi, Lees; is Cynthia here yet?" Rocky said.
"No, she can't come 'til after lunch becuz her grandmom is here."
Once Ally got in the door, Lisa said hi to him and Ally answered, not so loud that anyone could hear, but they both saw his lips move.
Lisa was wearing off-white cargo pants with lots of pockets — even some below the knees, a long-sleeved red knit shirt and thick argyle socks. Her very blonde hair was in a bun because she was dancing at her church that evening. .
She took Rocky's coat and hung it up for her. Rocky had on forest green corduroy overalls and a very pale green sweat shirt with a store name in silver sequins on it (It might have once been white and gotten washed with almost anything else Rocky owned.), and teal trainers over kelly green socks. Her hair was braided in new pigtails.
Ally was left to find a hook for his own coat, but it wasn't hard. He was wearing jean-cut navy corduroys and a roll neck sweater that was knitted out of different colors of yarn, so it looked like it had small horizontal stripes of bright red, bright yellow, burgundy, mustard, dark blue, tan and dark brown. His shoes were white and so were his crew socks. His hair was parted in the middle and was now kept just long enough to make a ponytail (his preferred way to sleep these days). It hid his ears and, if he had had a regular collar, it would have reached the bottom of it.
Rocky said, "This is Ally. We just 'came blood sisters today; see." Well, Rocky was sure she could see a tiny red spot on her fingertip anyway.
"How do you become that?" Lisa asked and after Rocky explained, rather than be excited and happy for them, she said, "Eww, gross." Then she asked Ally, "Why did you bring Angie out without her cape? She could get a cold."
Ally felt bad; he had tried to zip Angie inside his coat, but couldn't, and this attack on his mothering skills by a stranger seemed a bit much. He had to explain that he had only got Angie this Christmas and that he didn't have her cape yet.
Lisa said "Really, I thought Rocky said you were ten. I got Johanna when I was seven. This year I got her a new dress — she has five now — and her desk and her canopy bed.”
Ally could not think of a good excuse for waiting so long to get Angie, but did have a mild comeback. "Angie has three dresses already and a canopy bed too."
"I also got a new charm bracelet and this locket of real silver and a new 'puter game to design clothes with," Lisa said.
I think I should explain. Lisa isn't always this catty — well, she can be a lot worse actually — but she isn't always. Just over four months ago, she’d learned that she had been downgraded from co-bestest friend to mere co-best friend, and she had not taken it too well. This is her first meeting with the new, and solo, holder of the title she used to share with Cynthia. She didn't really think this was the best way to get the title back, but it had presented itself.
"Oh, I got a locket too," Ally said, and he wondered if bragging was contagious. He also felt what he was saying was sort of a lie. "Grama gave it to me, and it is really, really old. It's a silver heart and has an angel like carved into it." The truth was that his grama had told Steve to give the locket to Danni and that is what the gift tag had said, but the package had been delivered to Ally to keep safe for Danni forever. (The last five times he had seen his grama, she had called him Danni.) Grace had removed the pictures of herself and her sister as very young girls and replaced them with pictures of Grama and Danni.
Lisa asked if she could see it and was told that it was only for very special occasions. She tilted her head just enough to imply that she didn't consider such things real presents.
All right — hmmm. This party is going to last for three hours, and a lot is going to happen that I want to tell you about, but we don't need to witness everything. Actually, I've already discovered we can't; my perspective, it appears, is limited to what helps the narrative. So I'm going to cut from important conversation to important conversation and leave out much of what happens in between. Yes, yes, I'm going to do a montage in text. I know — I'm stealing this from movies; Howard and Spielberg could probably do it better. And right after I gloated about my advantages over them too. Doesn't it always turn out that way? So imagine a split screen with these bits flashing up on different parts or something like that:
***
Lisa quickly agreed to the New Year's Eve party idea (At last, one point in her favor; she did have an absolute veto, it being her house and all.) and even thought the Applebys should be in their nightgowns if they were going to be up that late, but decided that it was only polite to wait for Cynthia to get here with Rose before they were changed. She admired Maggie's French braid and decided to give Johanna the same. Ally had Angie's hair in an Alice-In-Wonderland, and Lisa prodded him to do a French braid too, until he admitted that he didn't know how.
"That's 'cause you keep your hair so short. Does your mother want you to be a boy or something?
Ally opened his mouth to explain; he said, "I — can get it ready faster this way. 'guess." When he started to say something else, it just wouldn't sound right.
He watched Rocky and Lisa do Johanna's and Angie's hair and almost learned how to do it.
***
During lunch Lisa said, "Gosh, maybe you're not such a tomboy after all. I mean, Rocky told us about you and soccer and building houses and stuff, but at least you eat like a human and not like a boy, the way Rocky does sometimes.
Ally knew that the only reason he was eating slowly and politely was because he was in a strange place. "I just like little bites sometimes. Sometimes I eat lots faster," he said. He really wanted to say more but couldn't.
Rocky stuffed an entire quarter sandwich in her mouth and said, "WWat yoooa meaon Yi aat wike ya bouy?"
Ally and Lisa laughed really hard and got their hands ready to slap her back when she choked, but she didn't.
***
"My teacher says I'm not s’pose to go on point yet ever," Lisa said, "but I can, see? Try it." And then she did a pirouette, but not on point.
Rocky was able to get on to her toes and stayed there almost a whole nanosecond. Ally couldn't even get close.
Lisa said, "Ally, you should take lessons. You're real narrow the way a bal'rina should be."
Ally shook his head. He thought Lisa looked wonderful doing her moves, but one person's sneer one time had ruined the idea of taking dance lessons for him forever.
***
Cynthia finally (!) arrived. Everyone ran to the entry; Ally stopped at the door. She was wearing a rainbow-striped stocking cap with three different colored pompoms and a dark blue canvas coat with red collar and cuffs. She had on denim jeans with the cuffs rolled up to show the plaid lining. When she took her hat off, Rocky and Lisa went wild (Ally would have gone wild too, but he was way too busy being shy.). Every hair on her head had been strung with beads about half way up; there must have been about a thousand beads, they thought. Her black, straightened hair wasn't braided, just pulled through, and then each strand was tied off. Unfortunately, she said, her brat little cousins had used a bunch of the beads, but they could all do theirs when the brats went away. Ally was very disappointed because he knew he would be gone by then too.
Then Cynthia took her ugly coat off, and Ally saw something even more wonderful. She was wearing a yellow very, very fuzzy v-neck sweater with little silver beads sewn around the collar that he thought was magnificent. Rocky and Lisa didn't pay any attention to it, but Ally wished he could just touch it or, at least, say how great it was.
Cynthia finally noticed Al, and ran over to him and said, "You must be Ally. I've been hearing about you for ages and ages and ages, and now I get to meet you. It's like meeting someone real famous. I'm Cynthia."
Ally grew a huge smile and managed to say an audible, "Hi."
Then Cynthia said, "That's a really neat sweater. It's got so many colors."
Ally replied, "I think your sweater is real great too. Can I pet it?"
Cynthia giggled and said, "Sure, it doesn't bite." And Ally giggled and blushed at using that word too (Being shy is counter-productive, isn't it?).
Cynthia rescued him. "Wanna swap?" she said.
Ally was startled by the generosity, he said, "Huh?"
"Not forever. I'd get skinned if I didn't wear it home." Cynthia rolled her eyes to stress that. "Just for t'day."
"But I might mess it up," Ally objected.
"Then you buy me a new sweater. That's what parents are for." Cynthia giggled; she wasn't nearly that mercenary or callous, and she trusted Ally.
When Ally got the sweater on, he didn't even think about being in someone else's house and went and stood on a chair so he could look in the mirror in Lisa's living room. Cynthia's pale blue turtleneck had looked better under it than his royal blue crewneck, but he thought that he looked pretty
***
First, Rose's hair had to be fixed like Maggie's, Angie's and Johanna's was. Then they were changed into their nightgowns. Of course, Cynthia had brought Rose's nightgown just in case. While everyone was busy changing the Applebys, Lisa said, "I hope I get Angie some day; she has the prettiest ni'gown — 'cus a' the lacey ruffles on the front and cuffs— and I want a nightie like it."
Ally said, "They can get each other’s clothes and stuff; they trade things in the books. Can't they?" He had Rose's bed and hoped this was permitted.
Lisa said, "Yeah! Shoot, now I gotta wait for my bird'day."
"I like the yellow ribbons on Johanna's n'gown. It's my fav'rit color," Ally said.
Cynthia said, "My favorite is blue, either bright like your shirt or real light like mine," and lifted up Ally's sweater to show everyone.
"Mine is either pink or red, can't 'cide," Lisa said.
Ally said, "Rocky's is purple." And everybody laughed except Rocky.
Finally, Rocky said, "Na-uh, I really like orange!" and started laughing too.
Rocky asked Ally, "You gonna wear your nightie like Angie's for the party t'nite?"
"That was sent by 'stake, I think," Ally said, "'Cuz I never wear 'em."
"But ya can wear it once; you brought it. It'll be pretty, and I'm gonna wear mine to match Maggie's ni'gown."
"I'll ask Mom if it's 'K. Maybe I could wear Da -- the locket too, 'cuz it's an 'casion," Ally said.
"If you never wear nighties, what d'ya wear to bed?" Lisa asked.
"Ni'shirts — ol' T-shirts, mostly."
"See," Lisa said, "your mom does want you to be a boy."
"Gah, Lees," Cynthia said, "I wear T-shirts a lot too. She doesn't have big brothers, Ally, You don't know 'bout hand-me-downs, Lisa. Wait 'til Scot wears your old nighties someday."
Lisa and Cynthia started laughing.
Ally started to say something but still couldn't make the words sound right, so he laughed too.
Then Rocky did.
***
At exactly ten hours and thirty minutes before the real time the top was popped on the champagne. — Well, it was sparkling cider, but it popped and fizzed and did all the important stuff. — All eight of them kissed all eight of them and yelled "Happy New Year" and then went outside and popped a whole bunch of those things that pop when you throw them down hard.
None of the Applebys seemed at all cold, in spite of being out in just their nightgowns.
***
"Really, you've only read four of the Appleby books? What do you read then?" Cynthia asked.
“Right now I'm reading the Prydain series 'gin. It's really neat! I got all five in hardback for Christmas," Ally said.
"What's it 'bout?" Cynthia asked.
"This boy named Taran," Ally said; then he smiled as he added, "He's an 'sistant pig-keeper."
Rocky laughed; she had just finished reading the series, and that was what you should say to someone who hadn't read it.
"Eww, bluck," Lisa said, "and you like that?"
"No, it's real, real good, Lees. I'll lend it to ya," Rocky said.
"Lend it t' me first. I want to read it," Cynthia said.
Ally said, "I was almost Taran for Hol'ween this year. It's great."
"My mom wouldn't let me be even a vampire," Lisa said, "I gotta be something girl. But you two are part boy anyway, I think."
Cynthia was appalled that Lisa would say something like that, but Rocky thought it was kinda funny.
Ally started. "I real..." but couldn't get it to sound right.
***
As he and Rocky got their coats on, Ally said, "Thanx for invitin' me. It was lots and lots of fun."
Lisa said, "Bye, Ally, nice to meet you. You are really nice, even if you are almost as much a tomboy as Rocky," and gave Ally a good hug.
Ally said, "I'm not really a tomboy, I'm..." but what he wanted to say just wouldn't sound right.
Lisa said, "I know! Your mom keeps doing boy stuff to ya'. Make her stop!" and stomped her foot, which made Ally laugh.
Cynthia gave him an even better hug and said, "I think you're even sweeter than Rocky, and I didn't think that was pos'ble. Make your parents move!"
***
Screen goes totally white. The whole screen does a slow fade-in to Rocky and Ally walking up the street. Ally is about six steps behind with a backpack over just one shoulder. Both carry their dolls, who are still in their nightgowns; Rocky carries hers with her arm across her chest; Ally's dangles at his side by just one hand as if she has no feelings at all. Just as the screen reaches full brightness, Rocky turns around and says:
"You u'set 'cus they thought you were a girl?"
Ally shook his head; some things were bothering him, but that wasn't one of them at all. He said, "You didn' tell 'em I was, di'cha?"
"’Course not. Why would I?"
Ally just shrugged; he had never imagined Rocky had, but he wondered how they didn't know he wasn't a girl. Rocky slowed down so they could walk together and took Ally's hand.
There were three things that did bother Ally right now. The first was not that he had never told Lisa and Cynthia that he was a boy, that didn't bother him at all. But it bothered him a lot that it didn't bother him. He took honesty seriously, and lies of omission usually counted to him. The second thing was that he had tried to tell them the truth, but every time he had started to, it had felt like he was about to tell a lie. He could not understand that.
It was too close to the beginning of his life and too close to the events for him to think about them so clearly, however. He knew there were two things, and he knew what they were, but that is not the same as being able to put a name to them. It was a confusion to him rather than a puzzle. So he could not talk about these things yet. Not even to Rocky, and that was a gigantic 'even'.
The third thing was clearer to him. He could talk to Rocky about it and finally, he said, "I suck at being a boy, and I stink at being a girl."
Rocky stopped walking and let go of Ally's hand. Then she put her hand on Ally's forehead like she was checking for fever — a strange gesture, but something she liked to do when people were feeling bad. She started to say that Ally was wrong about both, but then realized — or rather felt — she had no idea what being good at being a boy or at being a girl would really mean. Instead she said, in what she thought was a huge understatement, "You are the best — the most very most bestest Ally in the whole wide entire universe."
Ally took her hand again and wordlessly dared her to try to beat his new world-record-breaking highest skip ever. And she did!
Ice
"Fields or doors, Ally? Jenny?" Jim asked.
"Fields!" they said together.
"Are you nuts?" Gail said, "It's below 20 degrees out there."
"Yeah," Ally said. "Ms. Welton will probably cancel outside recess 'gin."
"'Sides we aren't old and decrepit like all of you," Jenny added.
Jim tried to do a creaky old person's voice, "That's right, Young-un, life ends at thirteen, and then it's all downhill."
"No kidding," Jenny said, "Look at T.K., he's already dead, just still moving."
T.K. said, "Just let them out on this side, then we can go behind the field house and skip the kiddy line."
"He speaks!" Jenny shouted. Those were his first words since he had gotten into the car, and she had a totally unrequited crush on him.
"You want to get out here?" Jim asked.
"Yeah, that's better." Ally said. The lower school carpool line was extra long because of the cold weather, and they could play soccer longer if they ran across the fields.
"OK," Jim said, "but take your stuff to the pavement before you start playing, and keep your hoods up and your coats zipped."
"Yes, Mothhheeer," Ally said with an excessive amount of exasperation in his voice. Then he stuck his tongue out at the back of Jim's head and Jenny followed suit. They thought it was a waste of a perfectly good expression, but they had forgotten about the rearview mirror.
"Don't stick your tongues out at me, or you'll have to walk to school tomorrow," Jim said.
Jenny said, "Oh no, he already has parent eyes, poor old thing."
T.K. said, "Hurry or you're going to make us late again; just get you stuff and go."
Jenny and Ally rolled their eyes at each other; every morning they were in the car at least five minutes before anyone else, and every morning they were accused of making the others late while they were getting out.
Ally said bye and closed the door.
Jenny said, "Good bye, T.K., it has been a pleasure talking to you," then closed her door.
Gail turned around and smirked at T.K.
He said, "Don't look at me like that; I'm nice to them in the afternoons, aren't I? You don't have to ride back here with them first thing every day."
"T.K., you need to start drinking coffee or go to bed earlier," Gail said.
Ally and Jenny ran over to the game field and took a sharp right; they would have had to be chased by several tigers before they would have stepped onto that piece of ground. Then they jogged towards the tiny creek that bisected the school's land. Just as they turned to follow the creek that would bring them to the two practice fields that served as the lower school playground, they heard several teachers start clapping their hands and saw that even Ms. Yunger, herself, had come out to chase everyone inside. She was the Lower School Head and always smiled and joked and knew everyone's name, but she was also the person you saw when you got into really bad trouble, so, even if that had never happened to them, all the students thought she was the most intimidating person in the world.
Ally and Jenny, with no more reason to hurry, slowed to a walk and strolled along the creek. The creek was about three feet wide at its widest and two feet deep at its deepest, but its banks were totally unkept so it was hidden by thick brush, and only the most intrepid of salamander hunters ever ventured down to it. (Which, of course, was the reason the area was unkept.)
When they had just reached the far side of the game field, Ally and Jenny heard a splash and then sobs. They went over to the edge of the thicket and saw a boy sitting in the water with ice cubes (really, very thin sheets) floating around him; he kept putting his head in the water as he cried.
Jenny whispered, "Do you know who it is?"
Ally nodded and said, "He's in the new class." (The school added a roomful of students at fourth grade but didn't mix them in until fifth.)
Jenny said, "I'll get Ms. Hawkins." She dropped her books and sprinted away.
Ally called, "Hell-O."
The boy said, "Damn it. Damn it. Just go away. Go away and leave me alone."
Ally made his way through the brush and said, "Aren't you cold?"
"'Course I'm cold, Idiot. — — — goddamn mother-fucking asshole shit headed bastard sonofabitch."
Ally tried not to be impressed; he had heard his peers use all those words but never so smoothly or all at once; even T.K.'s friends weren't so eloquent. He reached the edge of the creek just beside the boy and said, "Com'on, you're gonna get sick."
"I wanna. I wanna. I wanna die. — Just go — Goway! Goway."
"Wha' hap'ned?"
"None ur 'amn bidness — u so lucky, Ally, play with girl, OK. With boys; lots a friends, no one mind, can do anything, every like; not me...teased, laugh. Wish I wa' b you."
"Come on; Let's go." Ally looked for Jenny and grown-ups; he saw trees and bushes.
"NO! No. — I — just fix'n Tam's hair, call pussy; just fix'g 'er hair, six. Cry woul coul'n' — so he hit — he not 'pose to there, he s'po to 'gone. No' father real, you know that — he not. Hate 'im! He- he — 'cus a me, 'cus I horrible."
Ally tried again softly. "C’mon inside."
"Shit,fuck,damn go go who care's — 'bout me. No on — I can't nothing — go! — Hell hit again."
Ally had come to the end of his words. He had to do the only thing he had to do. He sat in the water and tried to put an arm around the boy, but the boy's head jerked away and he yelped in fear.
Ally saw the red mark turning blue on half the boys face, The boy yelled, "Go away!" then moaned, now much quieter, "die, die... always wrong — 'ca him. He'll kil'. I wish wo'd then be dead."
Again Ally put his arm around the boy, much, much more carefully; this time keeping his hand far from the boy's head. He found eight more words, but only eight: "I will be your friend forever. Don't die."
"No don' wan — Not with him. He hate.... Damn fu — bas — ," and now the boy had also come to the end of words.
I am a narrator. I can tell you all that happens around me if it helps this story; I can hear and report sub-vocalized thoughts; I can interpret minute emotional responses, often better than the character can. But all I interpret, hear or tell depends on the dramatis personae within my perception. Now there was no thought, no act, no time.
Jenny was the first person Ally saw. Mr. McGee, his teacher, was the first to reach him. Ms Hawkins was right behind. Mr. McGee picked Ally up. He carried Ally out of the thicket. Without putting Ally down, he made a call on his cell phone.
"I'm 'K," Ally said, "Help 'im. — Don't call his father–Don't call his father. — Help 'm–I'm 'K."
Ms. Hawkins, Jenny, and the boy came out. He wasn't resisting, but he wasn't helping. Mr. McGee put Ally down. He went back to the others.
Mr. Jeffers, the grounds keeper, was coming on his cart very fast. He stopped and Ms. Welton, the nurse, got on. They sped past Ally to the others. The boy was wrapped in a blanket. Two big bags were pushed off the cart. The boy was put on the back. Mr. Jeffers wrapped Ally up and carried him to the cart. Jenny rode up front, Ms. Welton on the tailgate. They went to the back door. Mr. Jeffers carried the boy in. They disappeared.
Ally said, "Don't tell his dad. Don't. Don't — don't."
Ms. Welton led Ally and Jenny past the lunchroom ladies into the hall. She removed her gloves and rubbed her hands. She felt their necks and foreheads. Ms. Yunger was there; she felt their necks too. She guided Ally and Jenny towards the office. Ms. Welton was gone.
Ally said, "Don't let him take him; don't tell him."
They got to the office; Ms. Yunger said, "Yolanda is Dr. Paulsen on her way? Jenny, who drove you this morning; did you come together?"
Jenny said, "With Jim."
Mr. McGee had just come in from the front. He said, "Ally's brother, a senior."
"Ally, go into my office and take off everything that is wet. Jenny, you too in Eliz...Ms. Chen's. There are towels for you. No one will come in. We will get you more blankets and clothes. Elizabeth, can you get some soup or broth for them from the lounge before you go to the infirmary? Yolanda, have Patty page Jim Greyson and tell him to drive to the backdoor — tell her to open the bookstore and get three — six sets of sweats,...
Ally said, "Don't call his father; don't let him come please!"
"...youth medium or smallest adult. Send them with Jim. Have him stop by the field house for six pairs of socks. Don't tell her anything else now, Yolanda, there isn't time anyway. John, your class? Peggy's?"
Mr. McGee said, "In art, Trish is free 'til 9:30. Peg's has scheduled gym. She's in the infirmary."
Ally said, "Don't tell his father. He's scared. Don't tell him. Don't let his father come!!"
"Good, stay here. Call Mr. Larski or his associate, Kandon or something. Tell them all you know. Tell them I say hospital, definitely, and to let the hospital report first. Dr. P. will want to know what he said as soon as she gets here. Don't let anyone in with them except...."
Ally screamed, "Don't Tell His Father! Don't!! Don't Let Him Come!!!"
Ms. Yunger wheeled on Ally, in the process she went from eighty mph to ten. She put a hand on Ally's arm and two fingers under his chin — she looked into his eyes — she spoke very slowly: "Ally, I will not tell anyone — I will not leave him alone with anyone — I will not let him go with anyone — until I am thoroughly, totally, positively certain — that he will be absolutely, completely, utterly safe. — I promise. — I promise. — I promise."
She raised her eyebrows and waited patiently. Ally nodded once, and she got back to eighty like her name was Unser instead of Yunger. "You two hurry, out of the wet things. Giddy-up. And rub your legs and eat your soup! John, no one in there except Linda; she will check as soon as the other one is OK; Jim with Ally, I guess. Yolanda, call me in the infirmary with his pediatrician's number, then call some coach and have someone get six pairs of socks out to Jim Greyson; tell them to steal them. There have to be twelve clean socks in there somewhere." She was out the door on her way to the infirmary before she finished.
With his nod, Ally's speed had dropped even faster than Ms Yunger's had. It had started higher and ended slower. Now he was suddenly very, very cold. He and Jenny turned and headed towards the back offices, and Jenny asked, "Who was that kid, Ally?"
It took a lot more words than he wanted to speak right now, but Ally managed to say, "Joseph Edwards."
Crumbs
Benny fell right on the top of his head and rolled down three steps.
Ally sighed very, very deeply. He had been trying to carry Bucephalus, Angie, Benny, Andre (Why do skunks always have French names?), a brush and a ponytail holder all at the same time and to keep them all comfortable. And his nightie kept sliding off his shoulder because the twelve buttons, which were in back, were all unbuttoned too. He sat everybody down, hiked up his sleeve and then tried to pick all of them back up.
Jim came around the corner and looked up the stairs. He smiled at Ally's predicament but only because Ally was turned the other way and couldn't see him. He said, "Ally, what are you doing? Trying to get me in trouble? You're supposed to be asleep."
"I need help with my buttons," Ally said, "and with my ponytail."
Jim had seen Ally in bed, in a nightshirt and with a ponytail (which Ally fixed without help every night) a half hour ago. He walked up the stairs to Ally and said, "What happened to what you were wearing?"
"It had toothpaste or something on it." It was a horrible excuse, but it was the best Ally had been able to come up with.
"And you don't have anything left that you could get into alone? You hardly ever wear this one," Jim asked as he started on the buttons.
That would have defeated the whole purpose, Jim. "I wanted to wear this tonight," Ally said.
Jim looked at Angie, Benny, Bucef and Andre. He knew Ally didn't usually need this much company to walk downstairs. "Does this have something to do with yesterday, Al?"
Ally was perfectly still and perfectly quiet. That was more affirmative than any affirmative answer could have been.
Jim said, "Want to watch this movie with me? I have to watch it for English class."
"'K. Is T.K. watching too?"
"Nah, he's upstairs playing with his dumbbells."
"You mean Carl and Greg are here?"
Jim laughed, mainly over how fast the promise of company had cheered Ally up. He had finished the buttons and the ponytail and asked, "Do you have something on your feet? Lift up your hem so I can see."
Ally lifted his nightie up to his knees. He was wearing the bright yellow and bright red striped socks that had been part of his witch's costume last Halloween. T.K. had been able to get out of art class just before the lower school parade and party; he had helped Ally paint his whole face green, paste on the ugly nose and eye brows, and ratted Ally's hair. Ally had looked spooky enough to impress everybody, and even the worst of the boys had not mentioned that the costume included a dress. The only problem was it took two whole days to get out all the tangles T.K. had made out of his hair. Ally was thinking about maybe being a good-witch next year.
Jim picked up the skunk, the two dolls and the brush, leaving only the horse for Ally, and took her hand.
Halfway to the den, Ally said, "I felt lonely."
Without letting go of her hand Jim pulled Ally's arm around so he could have an arm across her shoulder.
"Mom and Dad really didn't want to go tonight, you know. It's more a meeting than a party. They thought you were doing OK but were still very worried. But they have bosses too."
Ally sighed. He didn't want anyone to get in trouble or to worry about him or to even stay home. He just wanted them to be here.
"They are proud of you," Jim said.
"PPhfffft," (That's not exactly the sound Ally made, but it's as close as I can get to it.)
"Ally," Jim exclaimed, not loudly, "you're a hero."
"GruPhpffftt" (Ditto previous parenthetical.) It was when Jim talked this kind of nonsense that Ally realized Jim had somehow, at some time, become a grown-up. That made him very sad and very happy.
"You made a sacrifice, one that might have turned out to be dangerous, in order to help someone else. That's one pretty good definition of a hero, even without the danger part. And it's one of Mom's and Dad's too. — Plus you got to ride on Mr. Jeffers' cart; that must have made you a hero to everyone from fifth grade down."
Ally gave a tiny chuckle. That last part was kind of true, at least. That morning he and his mom, Jenny and her dad, Ms Yunger and Ms Chen had all had a meeting. They decided that all they would tell the other students was that Joseph had felt bad and went to the creek to be alone, and that Ally had tried to help him, and they had gotten wet. They had agreed that was all true and any more might hurt Joseph. But it was OK to say more to Jim, T.K. and Gail; Ally had made sure of that especially. Afterwards, Ally had had to talk to just Ms Chen about being sad for a while.
Ally started to go to his usual chair, but Jim grabbed the pillows out of it and threw them at an arm of the couch. He motioned for Ally to lie down and then put a throw over her. He sat at the other end of the couch, placed her feet on his lap and turned the movie back on. After three lines, he thought that this might not be an appropriate movie for her, but decided it was too late.
About then Ally jumped up and started bushing crumbs off the couch onto the floor. Then he looked at Jim, and both of them said, "T.K.'s spot." When he saw the pinkie pointing at him, Jim remembered what to do so fast that Ally never knew he had forgotten.
Afterwards, Ally held his palm up to Jim's and said, "Your hands got Mom's shape and Daddy's size, that's why you're so good a p'ano player."
Jim paused the movie. That had been said so many times in this house that he knew Ally was just making noise. He said, "And you have totally Ally hands. That's why you're such a good recorder player."
Ally gave Jim's arm a head butt, then sat on his knees and leaned against Jim, his legs hidden by the nightie.
Jim asked her, "You think you will take piano again after I leave for college? You'll be able to get to it to practice then."
Ally really didn't want to think about Jim leaving right now, but new instruments were another thing entirely. He said, "Maybe or the flute." He locked his hands together and twisted his arms around in front of his chest in unusual contortions, as if to prove that he was ten and could, then added, "Or maybe the trumpet or drums."
Jim laughed and said, "Either of those would make Mom real happy. She just got T.K. trained to use headphones on his amp."
Ally smiled and said, "Da'n't help much. Do you gotta scream and grunt to play g'itar?"
"If you're T.K. you do, I guess."
It was quiet for ten or fifteen seconds, and Jim reached for the remote; just as he pushed the button, Ally said, "Jim, why would someone want to die?"
Jim re-pushed the pause button not quite fast enough to confuse the electronics. That was one hell of a question to throw casually at someone, but Jim did his best. "Part of the reason might have to do with the way the parts and the chemicals in the brain work together, Al, but I think the main thing is that the person just can't find his or her own joy,"
"You mean, they listen when people tell them they aren' s'pose to do things they like, and arn' nice to t'mselves."
Jim wasn't surprised that Ally had already heard that part of his father's speech. He wondered if his father knew that T.K. might need it early too, but thought that one more year might not be too late.
"That's right, then they don't have joy to give, which is a very hard thing. Sometimes the things those people say get inside you, and even after the people are gone, they eat at you like a monster from inside. It must be a lot of pain."
Ally was very quiet, but Jim didn't restart the movie yet, he squeezed her a little tighter and said, "You know what homonyms and synonyms are, right?"
Ally nodded. They had just finished that stuff in English — again — this year.
"There is another kind of nym too."
"Yeah, antonym."
"And another, Smarty, do you know it?"
Ally shook his head.
"Heteronym. It means two words spelled the same but pronounced differently for two meanings. Can you think of any?"
"Like tear and tear?" Ally said proud that he found one so fast. That one still threw him once in a while.
"Project and project."
Ally said, "Does and dose."
"You mean does and does, but my favorite is Ally and ally? Do you know what ally means?"
"Oh, like a friend in war. I don' think people wou'd pick me for that."
"Nah. We need allies in any kind of trouble, and I think it is perfect for you. Joseph was very lucky to have you for an ally yesterday. I don't know what will happen to him, Ally; it might be very hard for him to beat all the monsters, but I know you helped him fight one monster and will be his ally again if you have the chance. — Will you be my ally, Ally? I'll be yours."
Ally just snuggled up even closer to Jim and didn't give a verbal answer. He knew that he had just received a wonderful promise and didn't know what to say.
Well, you knew we were going to have to face the Ally/ally thing sooner or later, didn't you? And we will probably have to deal with it again. Jim wanted to proclaim Ally Ally the Ally or Ally Ally, but I begged him not to do that. I always capitalize epithets, and can you imagine having to deal with that kind of confusion in text? I'm also going to insist that, if — when — it comes up in the future, no one begins a sentence with a-l-l-y with the common meaning, so you can count on the capital letter to tell you what is meant.
While I have you here, you might have noticed we are also confronting another kind of confusion. Jim has switched the pronoun set he uses when thinking about or interacting with Ally. That, at least, will be short lived. Soon Jim is going to change to the same practice in that area that, I believe, Rocky must find very easy and natural. While what Jim is going to do may be practical for him and easy for Rocky, I think it would be very cumbersome to try to do this whole narrative their way. Therefore, even though I know it is imprecise, until Ally tells me that something else is better — and only Ally gets a vote, not even I do — I am going to stick to the established custom and practice. It is, after all, what Ally feels most comfortable with at this time.
Blame the flaws in the language or your imperfect pen. (Pen being a metaphor for me, although I use a keyboard. I'm not talking about the leaky thing you use on envelopes.) I will, however, make at least one symbolic change due to the statement Ally's going to make. You're not actually going to argue symbolism isn't important, are you? Go ahead, I dare ya'.
While we were talking about all that, Jim actually got to watch two whole scenes and a little more. Ally was busy processing and digesting stuff, and biting on a bead. Now he is antsy again. He said, "I can't understand them, what's happening?"
Jim pushed the pause button again and felt sure that it was possible to watch TV with him in the room when he was ten. (How soon we forget!) He didn't let any impatience show to Ally, however. "That's because this was written four hundred years ago, and they use old words, but if you read some and listen some, then suddenly it becomes easy. At least it did for me. Watching is easier than reading, because the actor's expressions and movements give you clues. But you have to pay real close attention at first."
"But wha' 're they doin' now?"
"This is a silly play. It's about a girl who runs away because this evil king — he's called a duke, but in her country he is like a king — anyway, he wants to kill her. Doesn't sound silly yet, does it? But it is. She goes into the woods and disguises herself as a boy. Then she meets this boy who is also hiding from the evil king and is in love with her, but he doesn't recognize her because of her disguise. And then she and the boy decide that she will pretend to be the girl she really is, so he can practice talking to her. So there's a girl pretending to be a boy pretending to be a girl. Sound silly to you yet?"
Ally nodded and laughed. He said, "Then when she is pretending to be a girl the second time, she could pretend to be a boy again!"
Jim said, "Back when they first did this play, girls weren't allowed to be actresses, so it would have really been a boy playing the part."
"What if a girl really, really wanted to be an actress back then and pretended to be a boy so she could...."
"Been done, at least once."
"And she got this part! Then it would be a girl pretending to be a boy pretending to be a girl pretending to be a boy pretending to be a...."
"Ally, gee, how many layers do you think this cake needs?"
Ally snickered and snuggled back up next to Jim and tried to watch the movie. Soon he had a bead between his teeth again. He almost got through two more scenes before he said, "Jim?"
Jim silently moved the pause button above cell phones on his list of the necessities for a civilized life. "Yes, Ally?"
"Have you ever tried to tell someone somethin', and when you started to say it, it felt like you were lyin' or makin' a x-cuse, though you weren't."
"That might have happened; but I don't remember it. I guess it would mean I didn't really, deep down, know what the truth was. Has that happened to you?"
Ally nodded but didn't say anything else. Just after he restarted the movie, Jim got an inkling as to what that might have been about and thought his answer might have been too straightforward.
Jim knew he had made an assumption about Ally; it was an assumption he was absolutely convinced was true. However, he was empirical enough that that certainty made it even more important for him to test and prove the assumption. He knew if he were to make understanding his two siblings his life quest, as he intended, it had to be done.
He also felt that this was not the best time to probe Ally. She had much on her mind, he knew, and was still under some stress because of yesterday. He did not want to add to that. Plus he had a family taboo, of a least four or five years standing and which had gotten stronger each year, to overcome.
All of this did not make this the ideal time to talk to Ally, but it is not easy to get any ten-year-old in a quiet and pensive mood, especially if you’re a big brother who can't demand attention the way a parent can. Although he knew that the information would not be perfect or conclusive, Jim decided the time was now, even if he dared only to broach the topic peripherally.
So he interrupted Duke Senior and asked her, "Ally, do you ever wish you were a girl?"
Ally tilted his head to the left, but only a little, and said, "Yeah, sum'times."
That was about all Jim had expected really and, as expected, it didn't help at all. It didn't tell him about Ally's view of herself. He did note, however, that the question did not seem to bother her, even now. Her answer had been a simple statement of fact. The bead had not even gone to her mouth. But then Ally said something that changed everything.
Ally said, "Oth'r times I wish I was a boy."
That was all. Still no squirming, no bead, no distress. Again, a simple statement of fact.
Jim tried to hide behind the imprecision of a child's speech but found no succor there. He felt sure this was scientific serendipity. The flaws in the experimental design had rendered an exceptional and unexpected datum.
Jim wondered how Ally could only feel lonely following something as odd as the event with Joseph. He wondered what ancient sages, who found the question "Who am I?" ineffable, would do facing this child's question. He said to Ally, "I'm glad we're allies. I think you are a hero every day, not just yesterday."
Ally shook Ally's head then put it in Jim's lap. Ally's legs were pulled further inside the nightie. Ally hugged Bucephalus.
Jim put the throw back over Ally; he kissed Ally's forehead, then started the movie. With one finger, he caressed the arc of Ally's ear.
I hope he watches this play again before the quiz and pays attention to the ending next time.
Ally slept.
Ally dreamed.
who learns about the universe in the usual way: by growing up in it.
Scenes from a Kid's Life
Group 4: Dances, Storms
Scenes from a Kid's Life
Group 4: Dances, Storms
By Jan S
Edited by Amelia R (Many Thanks.)
©2006 by Jan S
Dances:
"By the foot prints in the butter," Josh said.
"You know how to tell if your house has mice?" he asked next.
"Which one do you want?" Sara Stern's mother asked Ally.
"Could I have the one with the all red jelly beans? Thanks," Ally said.
"Careful some of those are cinnamon," Mrs. Stern said as she put the cupcake on his plate.
"Your elephant is afraid to come inside. I want that red one there. Know why elephants have round feet?" Josh said.
"You like the hot ones?" Matt asked.
"I'm not demanding, but you have to say either please or thank you," the mother said to Josh.
"So it can walk on lily pads," Leah said. "That's old."
"You can have my red one, Ally," Alex said, "but I want it back if it's cherry." Matt and Hannah gave Ally some red jelly beans too.
"Either please or thank you," Josh said and put his red jelly bean next to Ally's plate.
Mrs. Stern tried not to smile and asked, "How many elephants can you get in your car, Josh?"
"Thanks, they're good, but you gatta save some juice to be safe," Ally said.
"You want it back after Ally's chewed it!" Hannah said, "That's soo gross."
"Seven," Josh said, "Two in front, three in the middle and two in back, I got a minivan. Why did the elephant paint his toe nails red?"
Alex said, "I was only kidding."
"To hide in the cherry tree," Hannah said. "Can I have that pink one?
"Now you're doing real old ones, Josh. Change subjec'," Leah said
"Say please, Hannah." Mrs. Stern said.
"Please," Hannah said and whispered, "Hannah," hoping the mother couldn't hear her and the kids could.
Josh said, "'K, this isn't an elephant joke. What's gray, has a trunk, is real big and likes peanuts?"
Hannah, Alex, Matt and Ally answered Josh by a staring at him. Leah said, "You call that not an elephant joke?"
"It's not. It's a beech tree with a squirrel in it joke," Josh said.
Hannah was holding a little red and white bear, and it jumped across the table to attack the bear by Josh's plate.
Matt said, "Come on, Ally, let's have a bear fight too."
"No! Mine's a nice bear," Ally said.
"Gaa," Alex said, "you're such a girl."
Matt said, "Mine'll fight yours, Alex."
"Nah," Alex said, "mine's a nice bear too."
OK — Confused yet? We really did jump into the middle this time; maybe I should explain the ground situation a little. This is Ally's class's Valentine's Day party, and they are all in the lunch room working on their sugar buzzes as fast as they can. The little bears were gifts from Mr. McGee to all the kids in his class. They had been holding a piece of candy, but the candy is long gone, and the bears are starting to get restless.
The other fourth grade classes are also in the lunchroom at their usual lunch tables. The fifth graders are having their party at the other end of the room, where the sixth graders usually sit during second lunch. (The sixth graders don't get a Valentine's party because they are going to have their first official real dance today after school — even though it's going to end at six-thirty, they think that makes them real hot shots — and all the little kids have to have their parties in their classrooms.) Still, there are a lot of kids in the room, and most of them are talking at any given time. The main way they can tell this is a party, and not a class or assembly, is because they don't have to take turns talking, and I don't have the heart to make them be orderly. Soon, however, they will cut out the chatter and get down to the serious fun.
"Hey," Ally said, "know what I saw in the newspaper? Scientist found out that dinosaurs use' to have races 'gainst each other."
"How could they find that out?" Matt asked.
"Yeah, that's dumb, Ally." said Leah.
Ally said, "Na-uh, they found dinosaur tracks, so they must a had races on them."
Hannah, Leah, Josh, Alex and Matt all groaned. The three closest red and white little bears, including Alex's who was supposed to be nice, became enraged and tried to attack Ally's bear. Ally, however, was fast enough to save her.
Leah said, "I'm gonna ask Mr McGee to move you from next to Josh, Ally. The class doesn't need two of him."
Alex asked, "Hey, who gave you that little box of chocolates, Ally?"
"I don't know; didn't have a name on it," Ally said.
"Boy, someone has a crush on you!" Leah said.
Josh said in a squeaky falsetto, "Ally has a secret girl-friend. Ally has a secret girl-friend." And they all giggled because, even if he was often a pain, Josh was never mean.
Ryan, who was at the far end of the next table, said, "Hah, probably a boy-friend if it's Ally." David and Michael laughed extra loud.
Leah said, "Just i'nore 'em, Ally. They're jerks anyway." Ally already was ignoring them. The only thing that bothered him was that David had laughed; he was Ally's bus buddy on field trips, and he was nice, and funny, until he got back together with Ryan and Michael.
Matt said, "Know that real big hill by that church with the big tower? Know what happened on that last snow day?"
Alex said, "It's a steeple not a tower, Matt."
"A steeple is like a tower," Hannah said in Matt's defense.
"You can't shoot arrows from a steeple," Josh put in.
"Could if you were skinny enough," Ally said.
"Whatever! I'm trying to tell a story here," Matt yelled.
"We were sledding on that hill, OK," Matt finally got to say, "and Alex's little brother hit a big stick going down. The sled jumps about twenty feet in the air (He kneels on the lunch room bench and raises his arm to stress the height of this feat.) and goes off this way; Alex's brother fell off, and he goes this way. He rolled about twenty feet and then slides about twenty more until he hits a tree. (Ally, who had just eaten three cinnamon jelly beans, took a big gulp of fruit punch at this point. It was poor timing.) Everybody is running to him and making plans for his funeral. Then her brother jumps up and yells, 'Put the stick back — I wanna try it again!' and her mom falls right over backwards."
Matt almost fell off the bench demonstrating, and all the kids started laughing extra hard. Red punch came out of Ally's nose, and the laughter got even louder. Everyone in his class and lots of other fourth graders looked over at their table. "Who gave you the bloody nose, Ally?" Josh yelled, which caused even more juice to escape through Ally's nostrils and everyone at all the nearby tables to join the laughter.
Mr. McGee strolled close to the table and, finally, Ally got a chance to swallow while Leah asked, "Did she really faint?"
"Nah, she was making snow angels when we got back to the top," Alex said, "but it was still real funny."
Hannah said, "Know what Josh and I did, we built a snow fort and...."
"Yeah, and we and Zack Dawson took on everybody on our street from other schools," Josh cut in.
As Josh and Hannah told different versions of the same snowball war, Ally looked around the room to see if anyone was still looking at him because of the punch snorting thing. One boy was: Joseph Edwards; his gray eyes stared intently at Ally from under his dark brown hair. Ally put his hand up by his shoulder and gave a very small, clandestine wave. Joseph quickly, and without any acknowledgement, turned away to look at the backs of the other kids at his own table.
That bothered Ally a little; when Joseph first got back to school, Ally had tried to talk to him a bunch of times, but Joseph had walked away and ignored Ally every time. Ally had had to talk to his mom about it. She had reminded him of the fox in "The Little Prince", and told him to just wait and be ready, because Joseph might be ready to be friends later. So Ally turned around to wait some more.
"That happened when they were in the fort," Hannah said.
"Oh, yeah,...but,..." Josh said.
"Hey!" Leah shouted, "Look what they're doing!"
Alex said, "What? Why can't we do that too?"
In one of the great injustices of the modern world, four TV screens and a whole bunch of pads for the dancing video game were being set up over by the fifth graders.
"That's not fair!" Ally said.
"Let's go talk to Mr. McGee," Josh said.
Josh, Leah, Ally and Alex instantly formed an ad hoc delegation and stormed over to where Mr. McGee was standing with some other grown-ups.
"Mr. McGee, how come they get to do that, and we don't?"
"It's unfair we can't too!"
"Why do only they get to?"
"Yeah, why not?"
Mr. McGee looked shocked, but then said, "Who says you can't? Who says you can't? Who says you can't? Who says you can't?"
The committee passed quickly from indignation to embarrassment to giggles. The fifth graders were going to get to go first, but they could go to the front of the line once the older kids had all had one turn. There were lots of other things to do while they waited, Mr. McGee told them. Regular dancing for the brave would take place on the stage, tables were set up for a tournament for the people who had brought their collectable card decks (no keepsies allowed), and some other games and contests were being set up too.
"And," Mr. McGee added, "three of the room mothers have brought stuff to do face painting. I know some of you guys are way too sophisticated for that, but they brought special colors, and I hope at least you four will let them paint you anyway."
I don't know about Alex, but Leah and Ally didn't think they were too sophisticated to do that, and Josh probably couldn't have thought of anything he was too sophisticated for. They were, however, happy to have an excuse not to have to pretend to be, even if it was as lame a one as being nice to a grown-up.
"But first, you have to clean up your table. That's not the lunchroom ladies job," Mr. McGee said.
Alex and Josh ran, and Leah and Ally skipped back to their class. After they told all the tables the news, Hannah said, "Wow, this is sooo much cooler then the parties we had when we were little kids." Then quickly stuffed the last of her cupcake in her mouth and asked, "Who's done it before? What's your longest combo?"
Most had done it and had combos of six or seven steps. Ally said, "I got a ten once but that was just lucky; my brother gets fifteens all the time."
Ryan came over from the other table and said, "Figures you would play girl video games too. Why don't you come to the card tournament, Ally? I'll kick you butt; I set up my deck last night and it is unbeatable."
Ally said, "I don't even have any of those cards. I do other things."
"Yeah," Hannah said, "Not everyone cares about that stupid game, Ryan."
"It's not stupid," Ryan answered, "you're just too dumb to figure it out. Too bad they don't have a doll corner. Ally probably would a' liked that."
Matt said, "Just go away, Ryan."
"Yeah, buzz off," Ally said.
"Well — look he even got a pink cupcake. I bet he's got dolls; he always reads Appleby doll books durin' quiet readin'," Ryan said.
"So what?" Leah said, "They're good. You should try one if you ever get up to reading chapter books."
"I read chapter books now!" Ryan said.
Mr. McGee came over to check the tables and sent Ryan off to get a sponge. Matt had wiped their table already, and Ally's group was ready to go. All six of them entered that Kid-at-a-Carnival space that we seem to lose the key to at puberty; their one and only task in life was to have fun, and they meant to do just that to the best of their ability and as fast as possible.
Josh, Alex, Leah and Ally rushed over to get their faces painted (Since Mr. McGee had given them that duty.). Alex got a Cupid painted on one cheek, and Leah got really neat looking roses painted on both hers. Ally asked for a red heart right where his third eye would have been. The lady added a pink outline and a pink arrow, and then she gave Ally a pink nose and red cat whiskers too. Josh got his face painted like a dog, complete with floppy ears; the lady put a heart shaped pink spot on one ear to make it valentinesy.
Josh went to the card tables after that; Ally, Alex and Leah went up on the stage to laugh at Matt and Hannah who were dancing. Soon the three of them were in a circle, moving to something like the rhythm; between songs a mother told them they were all good dancers and should go find partners; all three screamed and ran off the stage like she had yelled "Fire!"
They ran all the way to the mat where people had to put their hands and feet on different colored dots so that they got all twisted together. The girls almost didn't get to do it because they were wearing skirts, but Leah had shorts on under her skirt and lifted it up to prove it, so she could play. Alex wasn't, so she didn't and couldn't, but she didn't mind watching.
Ally's hair kept getting into his face at first, so Alex took off her hair band and gave it to him. It was a special one for today, white with red and pink hearts all over it. Ally started to put it on like a sweat band, but Leah stopped him before he messed up the heart on his forehead, and he put it across the top of his head and under the hair in back. After three rounds of the game, all of which ended in a massive heap with no clear winner, Alex noticed that some of the fourth-graders were doing the dancing video game, and they charged off to get in line.
Josh, David and Michael got in line right behind Ally and the girls. David and Michael had had their faces painted too: David had a tiger face, but with red stripes instead of black; Michael hadn't given in to the ladies, and his whole face was covered in dark green and olive drab camouflage. Ally, Alex and Leah gave each other knowing smiles; there were lots of heart shapes hidden in the camouflage, and they suspected Michael didn't know that.
The first song at the dancing game didn't go very well for any of them; with six people using each screen, it was necessary to watch different colors to tell how you were doing, and that was confusing. On the second song they all did better; Ally, Leah and Josh all got combos of four, but Alex and David got the highest scores out of the six.
After their second turn, Ryan came over, and David asked about his card game. Ryan mumbled something about not having enough energy in the middle of the deck, so Ally said something about fixing it and doing better next time. Ryan told Ally to mind his own business and got David and Michael to leave with him.
During the next round the kids were doing real well until the machine threw four doubles in a row at them; first a vertical, then two horizontals, then a vertical again. Alex got physically befuddled and fell down right across Josh's pad, and he fell on top of her. Several mothers jumped up, but no one was hurt, and everyone was laughing too hard to be mad, even though the spill had caused lots of people to miss a bunch of steps.
After that turn Josh saw Matt over at the free throw hoop and decide to go give him some advice, and Leah realized she needed to go to the restroom. She grabbed Ally's and Alex's hands to make them come with her. While walking down the corridor, Leah reenacted Alex's spill and sprawled on the floor. As she got up she said, "You should have just done a complete spin in the air instead."
Alex decided to try it even though it hadn't been serious advice. As she spun in the air, her skirt flared out enough to offend Leah's sense of modesty, so she wrapped her arms around Alex's legs to smooth the skirt down and both of them went sprawling across the floor yet again. By now all three were locked in a giggle fit. Alex looked up and down the hall to make sure it was safe and then tried to see just how high she could get her skirt to go. Leah decided she could do that too, in spite of her modesty, because she had shorts on under her skirt. Ally then started to twirl, but no matter what, he couldn't get his pants to flare out.
Just as they started to get dizzy, all the giggling turned Leah's need into an urgency; she grabbed the others’ hands again and pulled them to the girls' room door at a run. As he was pulled through the door, Ally yelled, "Aaarrghh," and Leah finally let him go as their laughter got even louder. Ally did one more spin then skipped through the next door and towards the fixtures on the back wall.
"Hey, girls don't belong in here."
Ryan, David and Michael were sitting on the sinks. Ally took a deep breath and continued towards the back.
"People with ribbons in their hair aren't 'lowed, Ally. Do ya' gotta' be so weird?" David said.
While Ally took care of business, Michael said, "He's got a pussy on his face, probably has one in his pants too. Must be pretending. Girls can't pee that way."
"Yeah, you need a wiener to do that, Ally," Ryan said through his laughter. "Do you have on panties too? With sweet little hearts on 'em?"
Ally finished and turned around. He said, "Ha, Ha," and decided this was a good time to break the rule about washing hands.
"Ha, Ha!" Ryan squeaked. "You're way too smart for us, aren't you? Always talking about how smart you are. Even know how to play our 'dumb games' better than we do. Just like a girl."
"Ashley told us you got a dumb little dolly you took to Leah's house," Michael said as he moved in front of Ally. "So prove you ain't wearing panties like your bow."
"I'm not; so just let me go."
"Prove it, and let me try on your ribbon and see if someone gives me a box of candy," Ryan said and got right in front of the door.
Ally gritted his teeth, then lifted his shirt and showed the top of his underwear. "Boxers. OK? Now get out of the way."
David said, "Let him go, Guys; we're gonna get in huge trouble."
"OK," Ryan said, "but from now on, girls gotta bring a box of candy anytime they come into the boy's bathroom, Ally."
"Yeah, like you make the rules, Ryan," Ally said.
"He's gonna go tell, Ryan. Jus' let him go," David said.
"Look, I'm tired of them making fun of me, so he can start doing something for me, and he better not tell," Ryan said, "or I'll give him a real bloody nose, and no one'll think it's cute and funny this time. Now give me the ribbon."
"Get out of the way, Jerk," Ally said.
Ryan grabbed the hair band and yanked Ally's head forward. Ally put his arms up and knocked Ryan back into the door handle. Ryan swung at Ally but completely missed him. "Watch it, Freak," Ryan said and grabbed Ally's neck. He pulled the hair band off and tried to push Ally to the floor. Ally was crying as he grabbed the hair band and tugged on it. Michael wrapped his arms around Ally's chest and began tugging on him.
David grabbed Ally's and Ryan's wrists and tried to pull them apart; he yelled, "Stop!!"
Ryan stomped on Ally's foot and kicked his shin. Ally kicked back hard at Ryan's knee and tried to kick Michael with his heel. "He even kicks like a little girl," Ryan said.
The restroom door opened, and Joseph Edwards hollered, "Hey! Leave Ally alone!"
Michael said, "Ooh, the cry-baby sissy has come to save the uber-sissy."
Ryan turned around; without letting go of the head band, he said. "What ya' gonna' do? Cry on us, Edwards?"
Joseph yelled, "Don't call me that! Get out or else!"
Ryan mocked, "Gweet out or telse. Wa Wa Wa."
Joseph lunged at Ryan, knocking him into the others. David was pushed backwards into the latch of one of the stalls, opening a gash on his back, and he cried out. The hair band ripped, and Ryan let it go. Ally fell into Michael; his head smacked into Michael's nose, and Michael's head smacked into the wall. Michael grabbed Ally's necklace (the gift from Rocky) as he hit Ally in the mouth with the other hand. The necklace broke, strewing beads all over the floor, and Ally's lip bled. Ally flew at Michael, fist flailing at Michael's face until Michael buried his head in his arms crying.
Ryan had grabbed Joseph and then kicked his feet from under him. Ryan tried to pin him to the floor, but Joseph had twisted away and pulled Ryan to the floor. Now bawling, Joseph knelt over Ryan, swinging wildly at the back of the also bawling Ryan's head, while David tried to pull Joseph away.
The door opened again, and Mr. McGee came in.
Storms:
–FLASH–
One...Two...Three...Four...Five...Six...Seven...Eig -
–BOORRMB–
It was a dark and stormy night. Ally was lying in bed and counting his heartbeats: eight heartbeats — just over five seconds — over a mile. The lightning was hitting almost half way to the grocery store or just inside the big park, depending on the direction. A few years ago, back when lightning had scared him, his father had told Ally how to figure out how far away it was (or at least sort of just about), and he knew how far it was to those places because his father told him when they rode their bikes there, and he liked knowing stuff like that.
Ions, atoms with extra electrons, little tiny bits that carried electricity, or sort of did, got into big groups in the clouds and then decided to move to the ground where there weren't enough of them; or just the electrons did; or the other way round; or something like that. He'd have to ask someone to explain it — again. He always understood it for a little while after it was explained. He liked knowing stuff like that too, but he kept forgetting it. He didn't think he was very smart.
Why did Ryan think he acted like he was?
It was all his fault. He had messed up real bad.
–FLASH–
One...Two...Three...Four...F -
–BRRROOM–
You couldn't do what you wanted because people would always hurt you because of it. You had to hide some things you like. You even had to hide how smart you were lots of times. T.K. had told him this in the car.
The rain was going to melt his snowman, but that was OK; he was already looking yucky and didn't have a head anymore. It would also get rid of all the piles of snow by the streets, and that was all hard and real dirty. If Ally had thought of the meteorology unit in Earth Science, he would have remembered that thunder storms in February were unusual, but he lived far enough south that they did happen. They happened about as often around here as February snow storms, and that had happened this year too.
His lip tasted funny from where it had been bleeding.
–CLAAARK–
He hadn't seen the flash. Had his eyes been closed?
Jim didn't think T.K. was right about that, and sometimes you had to be careful, but it was OK to be what you were. But T.K. said even math (T.K.'s favorite thing in the world — except maybe the guitar) was all made up and you couldn't prove things with it, you just had to act like it all fit together, so nothing was fair or made sense in the world. Ally didn't follow that at all; what did arithmetic have to do with fights? And Jim had said that T.K. was sad because he had just read a book on math that had upset his entire world, and because T.K. had a crush on someone and wouldn't even tell anyone who it was.
–FLASH–FLASH–
One...Two...Th -
–CRAAOORRooomBroorrr–
Yikes!
T.K. said Jim should shut up and that wasn't true.
Ally wasn't afraid of thunder and lightning any more, of course. He was almost ten and a half after all. He had slept through lots of storms and didn't see why this one was being different.
He wanted to give something a hug, but Bucephalus was piled in a pile on the floor with lots of other stuff. He would never be able to chase after Darius III again. Now he couldn't get back in time to beat the Persians anymore.
His special Valentine's present was in the pile too. He had said he wanted it a lot, but he hadn't been happy about it, and he had to tell everyone what he had decided during dinner instead of waiting, and would never ever get to use it.
A tear rolled down Ally's cheek.
The present was supposed to have been brought by the Easter Bunny and laid with his eggs. Not that Ally believed in the Easter Bunny, or even Santa Clause, anymore, but it had used to be fun to pretend. But his mom had given it to him early to cheer him up, and it had made him even sadder.
He liked Easter; everybody wore really pretty clothes and was happy on that day. Of course, he didn't. He always wore just a blue shirt, dress-up pants, hard shoes and a yellow tie. But some people got to wear pretty stuff.
It wasn't fair — why did it matter —
–FLASH–
Why couldn't he wear just a hair band even? Why were people mean? He hated them, hated them....
–BOOooRrrm–
Oops, he had forgotten to count.
His daddy was disappointed in him. Hate didn't do any good. Love meant wanting the other person to be happy before you could feel happy, so hate meant wanting the other person to be sad before you could be happy. He didn't really want that, he guessed, and that wasn't real happiness at all. It wasn't good to hate, but he couldn't help it.
Fishermen sometimes wore spikes on their shoes. T.K. had read about it in a science-fiction book. When the boats sank, they would stand on their friends and put spike marks on them, trying to reach the air. That was OK if you were drowning, but not in a dining room. Teasing was like that — they were afraid, so they tried to push others down to feel bigger.
Then why didn't they pick on big people?
He was a freak. Why couldn't he be like everybody else?
Why? — He had to be, had to be, had to be.
His daddy didn't have a Porsche because of the seven day rule that Ally had never heard about before.
–FLASH–
One...Two...Three...Four...Five...S —
–BooAomb–
His mom invoked it about once a year and made his daddy wait when he wanted to buy a new car; that was why he and his brothers had to go to a private school. So he had to wait a whole week before he could get a burr haircut or paint his room brown, even though those were really his choices to make.
But he wasn't going to change his mind. He couldn't.
Jim was real mad at him. When he was going back to the table, Jim had walked past and just stared at him meanly. He was sorry, but he didn't know what to do. He didn't want to get hit anymore.
Two tears rolled down Ally's cheek.
It wasn't just kids that tried to get bigger by standing on top of people. There was someone that had written books saying that was the right way to act. Jim had had to read one of them. People had a duty to take what ever they could, even if it meant hurting others, and giving people help was bad.
But his daddy said that even cavemen knew they had responsibilities to their groups, and warlords in the Middle Ages knew they had to take care of the people who worked for them and helped them. His mom said the lady that said that was really very, very sad too. She had taken most of her ideas from other people, then mangled them, and then told everyone how much smarter she was than the people she stole from. And the people that were best at following her philosophy were the people that that lady had hated most; they just used different words. So that at least her followers told you they were liars and cheaters, so maybe that was better.
The whole idea of people thinking that had made Ally shiver. And why did grown-ups always go off the subject and have discussions like that. It didn't help at all. Ally didn't know yet that his family was incredibly bad about that kind of thing.
–FLASH–
Ally guessed he should feel sorry for people who thought like that too, even grown ups, because it was just an excuse for feeling scared too.
–Booorrmm–
How was it possible to feel sorry for people who teased all the time and pushed people around all the time and tried to make everyone be like them and do what they wanted? Even if they were just trying to build them selves up, and they were just scared? You really should feel sorry for them, not hate them, but that was real, real hard. But don't tell them you did because they really, really didn't like that. It was a secret revenge. That was a funny idea to T.K. and his daddy.
–FLASH–
One...Two...Three...Four...Five...
–KRaabooomoom--i
Josh had a big floppy dog that stayed on his bed all the time; Matt had three bears, but he kept them on a shelf. Maybe it would be alright to just keep Bucephalus?? No No No.
Boys could, but he couldn't. People would find out. Leah had told Ashley about Angie. But she wasn't mean at all and liked Ally. You just couldn't keep secrets. Can't keep that kind of secret at all, ever. So he couldn't do those things anymore.
He couldn't fix Angie's hair any more or dress her. Couldn't change or feed his Benny, or like babies at all. He couldn't wear ponytails, even to bed. Couldn't wear his beads, even though they were really boy beads, and stupid Michael had broke Rocky's. Couldn't wear Danni's locket. Couldn't look pretty, or even want to. Couldn't like pretty things, like flowers and butterflies. Couldn't like yellow anymore; or ever, ever wear pink or purple. Or teal or turquoise or.... Couldn't even know the names of those colors. Couldn't skip, or twirl, or spin, or giggle or laugh, except in just the right way. Couldn't like puppies or kittens. Couldn't call things cute or sweet. Couldn't cry...cry...not ever, not ever, no matter what, ever again.
He wasn't going to be weird anymore!
More tears rolled down each of Ally's cheeks.
–FLASH–
One...Two...Three...Four....
Maybe when he was visiting his grama and Rocky, he could do those things? Cynthia and Lisa had liked him. They didn't know he was a freak; maybe he could do things he liked there. But no — no, not even then; he might forget. He had to stop being strange, a freak, everywhere.
–BBRrooomm–
Besides, it made everyone one mad and unhappy, not just him.
–FLASH–
His mom had been yelling in the dining room while he was washing his face during dinner. Yelling about making decisions and this, maybe, being the start....
–CARaaaboom–
...and being a little kid longer not being an easy answer, unless you were absolutely sure it was right; but if it was right, then that is what would happen, but later; the decision did not have to be final yet.
Ally had waited in the hall, because he wasn't sure who was getting yelled at or what it was about. He hoped it wasn't about him, because he sure didn't want to be a little kid any longer at all.
She had said happiness was as important as air and water, but safety was even more important, and babies fighting was nothing like what could happen later — so the argument wasn't about him — and things were better for people in Jim's school because the other kids were older and the school encouraged tolerance, but they still had troubles with some students, just not openly, and Jim didn't know about it, and also they had to go places with people not in his school and might be scared in those places.
At least it was Jim that was getting yelled at, and that was good — because it wasn't his daddy, but it was still real, real bad.
He wasn't supposed to put his tongue on the sore on his lip.
Then his daddy had told Jim to spare them his great and vast eightteen-year-old's wisdom, and Jim had left the room and stared at Ally as he went past in the hall. And he didn't know why Jim was mad at him too. And he didn't know why his parents were mad at Jim, but thought he should help Jim, but couldn't because he didn't want his parents mad at him. He thought a real boy would have gone in and fought for Jim, but he just couldn't right then.
Jim hadn't even come back for dessert, even though it was a special Valentine's Day one.
Why did Valentine's Day have to get ruined? It was supposed to be about love, but now, forever, he would remember it as about hate and fighting and being a boy and being weird.
–FLASH–FLASH–
His daddy had told him he could still play with what he wanted at home and no one would hurt him; that was when he told them he didn't want to be a freak anymore anywhere. That made his mom and daddy and T.K. very sad and quiet, and he got to go upstairs and go to bed.
–BBbbooooormBrooorrrm–
Why couldn't this stupid lightning go away and let him go to sleep? He didn't want to think about this stuff anymore.
Why, why, why? Why wouldn't they leave him alone? Why was he like this? A weird freak.
He had to do the right things from now on. He couldn't hold hands ever; if he put his arm around someone, he had to make it into a head lock, and he had to make it look like that was fun. He couldn't lean up next to people; now he had to push and shove and wrestle and be rough. He had to start playing shooting and chasing video games and talk about them all the time. He had to get some of those stupid, collectable battle cards and learn all about them. He had to learn to slide tackle, even if it was illegal in his league and on the playground. He had to stand right, with his arms crossed all the time or in his pockets, and his shoulders up; he couldn't cross his legs when standing around, because when boys did that it meant they had to pee real bad. He had to do more ninja kicks and jumps; he could do those now, but from now on he couldn't laugh when he did them; he had to look mean. He couldn't look happy ever actually; he had to look cool and tough and serious, except when something was funny or someone else was embarrassed. He would have to act dumb in class and make fun of the lessons, but show off too. And he had to be cross and bossy a lot. He had to make sure he didn't look cute — Ever!
Of course not all boys were like that....
–FLASH–
Josh was always laughing and happy, and he was real good at history and spelling too, and he was sweet. Matt was a real good scientist and always tried to help people, and he was real nice, Ally thought. And Joseph Edwards was cute too.
–KkRraabooormb–
But Ally didn't think he could be like that; it was too close to what he was now. He wanted everybody to know he wasn't weird any more. He wanted to be the toughest of all. He wanted to — had to — go from being uber-sissy to being uber-boy.
He wanted to be really gigantic so he would never have to be scared. He wanted to be really, really strong. He wanted to not be Ally anymore. He wanted to scare everyone. He wanted to be left alone, forever. He wanted to run away — and not be weird. He wanted to shrink down in to something no one could see. He wanted to shrink down and just disappear. He wanted to not be anymore.
–FLASH–
–The power went out. It had seemed dark before, but there had been light coming through the window from a street light, and Ally's clock-radio had had lighted numbers, so it was much darker now. Also the sounds of the house, like that of the air being forced through ducts by the furnace and that from the bathroom space heater that someone had left on, which hadn't been really heard before, now were silent and were missed.
–Crraaaccckoom–
Of course, being almost ten and a half, Ally wasn't afraid of the dark, even this very dark that surrounded him now, especially now that he was going to act totally like a boy. Yet, still he thought about the flashlight on the shelf across the room. If it wasn't for all his girly stuff stacked up in the middle of the room, it would have been easy to get, even in the dark. As it was, he would have to walk carefully around the edges of the room to get to it.
But was that allowed for a boy? He knew boys were allowed to own flashlights, some had lots of them, but were they allowed to use them when they weren't doing something? Just because it was dark?
Why did boys have to have all these stupid rules? Girls didn't have them; they could just do what they wanted and no one teased them for it. They could wear pretty stuff or yucky stuff. They could dance and giggle and skip and sing and hug and act just as they wanted, but boys always had to worry about what others would think. It was like they had to always be putting on a show. How was he going to learn all these rules?
Jim and T.K. would make fun of him or try to talk him out of it; plus they were old and might have forgotten things. More so with his daddy. Josh would just get real silly about it, and Matt, he thought, would try to help but wouldn't understand the question. Joseph Edwards?
–FLASH–
Joseph and he had had to sit together for a long time on the infamous green couch in the office. That was where you waited for Ms. Yunger when you were in bad trouble, and everyone could see you and knew why you where there. Ally had never sat on it before, and to him sitting there had been a punishment in itself. Joseph hadn't seemed to mind though. He talked and talked to Ally; he told Ally about his stepfather leaving and about changing his name to his mom's old name and about his real father and half-brother being in a plane crash. He acted like Ally was a long lost friend all of a sudden after ignoring him for all that time. That was the one good thing about the day, because Ally thought of Joseph as a long lost friend too.
Ally hadn't said much back to Joseph, and he hoped Joseph wouldn't stop being friendly because of that.
It was Ms. Chen that finally called them into the office instead of Ms. Yunger, and she had called Joseph Jody. Ally wondered if that was part of the name change that Joseph had talked about. He hoped it was, because Jody was a much better name for a tamed fox than Joseph. Ally thought of Jody as a tame fox because of the story that his mom had reminded him of, and because it seemed he had finally come all the way over to Ally. When Ally thought of Jody that way, for the first time in a very, very long time, he smiled.
–Boobbrroom–
Finally! — An active verb! That's the first motion that has taken place in this scene, unless you count thinking, rolling tears and rolling thunder. That verb turned out to be 'smiled' too; who would have thought it? I was becoming afraid Ally might never do that action again.
We've also almost made it through a whole chapter without a single set of quotation marks, and that's pretty unusual for a character driven story too. After the last chapter, where we started in the middle of a crowd scene dialogue and followed it with a litany of party activities, I thought I'd — well, abuse you in the opposite way this time. Sort of even things out a little — uh; maybe not. Anyway, I'll probably have to lose this whole scene when I write the screenplay.
I know some might feel that Ally's thoughts should have been marked off as quotes, but it really wasn't like that. All these thoughts raced through his brain quickly. He didn't have to think in details to recall the events; he didn't have to paraphrase each discussion to remember its import. Nor were all of his thoughts fully formed. So this was really a combination of exposition of antecedent action and dialogue, extrapolations from associations and emotional reactions, with only a few implicit thoughts. Trying to distinguish one from the other would not make Ally's feelings and ideas any clearer.
Now Ally is about to start doing things the way a protagonist should in his own story. Who knows, he might even have a coherent thought or two as well.
Ally decided that it would be OK to keep the flashlight in his bed as long as he didn't turn it on. He walked around the perimeter of the room, touching the walls and bookshelves as he went, and the only thing he stepped on was his Degas poster with the corner he'd ripped that afternoon. When he reached the flashlight, he thought of a good boy excuse for needing it and decided to head to the bathroom.
We always tell children to appreciate the small things in life, but surely some things should be such givens that they don't need that kind of appreciation. Never the less, Ally did appreciate the fact that he didn't have to be careful walking into this bathroom. In this house, at least, they were safe.
The little room was very warm because the space heater had been left on so long, and it felt really nice to Ally. He set the flashlight on the counter, and noticed in the mirror how red his eyes were. After putting some water on them, he looked at his eyebrows. Before, he had always liked his eyebrows; they reminded him of his mom's. She didn't have real dark, hard looking ones like some ladies, but kept them just a little dark, like Ally's, and soft. He had still liked touching them sometimes when she held him, but now that couldn't happen anymore. He supposed he needed to start wanting thick, bushy, gray eyebrows like his daddy.
Ally looked in the mirror some more and practiced scowling, or looking tough or cool, but didn't think he could get it right at all, so he turned off the light in frustration. Probably because of the warmth, in here the darkness felt very comforting rather than eerie.
He crossed the room and felt for the edge of the toilet. Then he aimed by sound as he urinated. I mention that only so you won't mistakenly read a Freud-Erikson scatological creativity metaphor into the shift that Ally makes as he emerges from this small, warm, safe, dark room.
Ally waited till he had opened the door to turn on the light. As he did, he actually kicked the wall and thought, "To heck with it. I just don't care." By which he meant, of course, that he cared a whole, whole lot, but that he had realized it would be as hard, and scary, to hide from those cares as to face them.
It took him three skips to reach his bedroom door. In spite of the flashlight in one hand, he had his nightshirt off before he got all the way inside; then he pulled off his boxers too and kicked them into a corner. He gave Bucephalus an extra tight hug by way of apology. He set Angie's bed up, gave her a kiss and tucked her in deciding that she could wait until tomorrow to wear her new nightgown. He put Benny, Andre, Frosty and the other important creatures on his bed.
Then he opened the box and took out his beautiful, brand new, antique nightie that looked just like Johanna Appleby's. He gave it a hug too, before he slipped into it. The buttons were on the front of this one, and he did them all the way up, then he tied the pretty, yellow, satiny ribbon at the collar into the very best bow he could. There was no way for him to tie the ribbons on the cuffs, but that didn't matter.
He found his big, yellow, cloth covered scrunchie, and put his hair into a ponytail just a little bit higher than he ever had before. He thought he would wear it to school tomorrow — but maybe not. But he would wear his bright yellow pullover — and his pink knit shirt too. And he would skip and spin around while he was in line! Even though that would make Mr. McGee cross. And he would look right at Ryan while he did it, and he’d grin.
"I'll be happy," he thought, "That'll show 'em."
Ally slept.
Ally dreamed.
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Group 5: Songs; Stories
Ordinary events in the life of an unordinary child.
Ally heard the piano; he threw his pencil up in the air and ran out of the room.
©2006 by Jan S
Edited by Amelia R.
Songs:
Ally heard the piano; he threw his pencil up in the air and ran out of the room; he thought that Jim was home, and he badly needed to talk to Jim, and he badly needed an excuse to quit doing homework.
Whenever he divided a half a cake by one fourth, he kept winding up with more cake than he started with. How dumb was that? Why couldn't math be logical? And finding out why Jim had been mad at him last night was way more important anyway.
When he got to the living room, the piano player stopped playing and waved to him. Ally said, "Oh, it's only you."
Larry answered, "'Only me?' I like that!" But since Ally's expression hadn't matched his words, neither did Larry's.
"I thought it was Jim. I got to talk to him. Can I listen?" Sometimes when his daddy played the piano it meant he wanted to be alone.
"Sure, come and sit with me, puddin'. Jim is the usual piano player in this house, isn't he? Want to talk to me about it instead?"
Ally sat on his heels on the bench and leaned against his father. He said, "Nah, it's got to be him."
"OK. I'm sure glad to see a much happier kid in this house than the one who was here yesterday. Did you have a good day today?" Larry said.
"Yeah, mostly."
"Learned something in every class?"
"Yeah, mostly."
"And you've got your homework done?"
"Yeah, mostly."
"Is you brain stuck?"
"Yeah, mostly."
Larry thought real hard, then said, "Hummm, who did you play with at recess?"
"Yeah, mostly."
Ally's ribs were tickled until he said, "Jody, mostly; and Alex and Leah."
"Who's Jody?"
"Joseph Edwards; 'cept he's Jody Ducoux now. Can I spend the night over at his house Saturday?"
The fact that Ally looked straight down at the keys when he asked that question was enough of a warning for Larry to avoid the pitfall. He asked, "Didn't your mother pick you up at school today? And did you already ask her that question?"
Ally nodded, so Larry shook his head and said, "You know that's not fair, Al."
"But I need to be nice to him."
"OK, but you can't play us against each other. And I think we need to get to know them better before a sleepover. Is that what your mom said?"
Ally nodded and said, "But...."
Larry reached across Ally to reach the high end of the piano. He played the melody of a Rolling Stones song and said, "You know this song. Sing the next line."
Ally sang in a very high treble at the same time that Larry sang much lower, trying to imitate a Brit trying to sound Country-and-Western. They sounded terrible, but luckily, Larry stopped playing after only two lines:
"You can't always get what you want; you can't always get what you want...."
Ally looked down at the keys some more. "You always play just that," he said; then continued singing at the top of his range: "...you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find you get what you need. Yeahhhhh. I'll talk to mom some more."
Larry chuckled and said, "I think that's OK, but remember three things: there is a fine line between 'try, try again' and begging, whining and pestering; 'because I want to' is not a good reason to keep the discussion going; and third, 'because I really, really want to' is the same argument as the other one."
Ally thought about that until Larry asked if he had any trouble at all at school.
Ally said, "Yeah, some."
"Uh-oh; what happened, Pud?"
"Division by fractions; how come when you divide a half a cake by a fourth of a cake you wind up with two cakes? Least I do."
Larry almost laughed. That was not the kind of trouble he had been asking about, and that answer was the best news he could have heard. "We'll look over it after dinner. Your arithmetic is OK, but how do you divide by a fourth of a cake, maybe with a fourth of a sword, but with a fourth of a cake it would just make a big mess."
"I don't get it," Ally said, his head leaning far to the left.
"A number is abstract, Ally. It doesn't have to be a fourth of a cake."
Ally looked totally flummoxed and his head tilted a little more, but he said, "I know that, but still, even if you divide a half cake to one fourth of a person and they get two cakes, that means the whole person would have eight cakes. Where did all the extra cakes come from?”
Larry put his head in his hands; he was now chuckling aloud. Ally said, "Don't laugh at me!" and head-butted Larry's arm.
"I'm sorry, Sweetheart; your logic is impeccable, but your understanding is absent. I need to think about how to explain it. After we eat, we will look at it together. At least you know how to do it, even if you don't know why. You'll get there and go 'AHA, of course!'"
After he played a simple etude, Larry said, "You know Jim and T.K. have play rehearsal. They won't be back until you're in bed. Did you need to talk to Jim about something very important?"
"Oh, I wanted to ask why he was mad at me last night."
"Al, Al, he wasn't mad at you at all. I don't think you could make him mad these days; he is so much on your side, but he thinks he — never mind."
"We're allies."
"Oh, I see; that's good. He wasn't even mad at your mom and me, Pud. He was worried and frustrated, and he was mad because the world is unfair, and the shortest distance isn't always a straight line, and because he is eighteen, and because...." Larry sighed and then shrugged and then grinned at Ally.
"Were you mad at Jim?"
"Nah — Yeah, a little bit. Having smart children is my punishment for loving a brilliant woman, Al. You be careful about things like that. — I take it you've got all your things put back away now."
"Yeah, mostly," Ally said with a smile, then he got serious again and said, "Mom was real mad at him though."
"Your mother mad at her child? Never! Irked, cross, peeved, perturbed, irritated, maybe. But not mad. Annoyed; she does get annoyed. Never get your mom annoyed, Ally. She already has two closets full of noids that your brothers got her."
"That's mom's joke."
"She lent it to me because I like it. You want new material all the time like I'm a TV show or something?"
"I like 'Be alert; the world needs more lerts,' better," Ally said and leaned against Larry again.
Larry played another short piece, and then Ally asked quietly, "Were you mad I was going to throw things out?"
Larry shook his head several times. Then he said, "I thought you were being very extreme, Ally, but you have to explore different ways of doing things, I think. It's like math; you have to keep looking until you have that Aha-experience. I wish I could keep you safe and happy forever, and I try my hardest, but if I just gave you the answers, even if I knew them, that wouldn't give you understanding or make you happy. It can be hard at times, deciding what to allow, what to require, and what to forbid; that's why they don't let just anyone become a daddy."
Ally hugged Larry and put his head on Larry's shoulder. He said, "I was being mean to myself."
Larry shrugged and said, "Maybe. Pud', maybe. It is hard to know sometimes which is being meanest to yourself. That is why they don't let just anyone become a human, — or especially an Ally." He wrapped his right arm around Ally and kissed his forehead.
Ally thought this conversation was too serious and wanted to say something happy, but he had a hard time coming up with something. Finally, he said, "David Grimell found almost all of Rocky's beads."
"Yea!" Larry said.
"He wouldn't go to the doctor's 'til he had looked."
"Did he have to go to the doctor's because of your fight?"
"He had to get four stitches in his back."
Larry stared at the keyboard and then shook his head. "And you wondered why you got a detention. Ally, even though they know you didn't start it, the school has to do something when someone gets that hurt, and you and Joseph did get very mad and kept hitting after you could have stopped."
Ally didn't need to be reminded to feel bad about that, and especially about David getting hurt worst of all, but he still said, "David wasn't mad at Jody or me; he said it was Ryan's fault, and he wasn't going to hang out with him anymore. But I know I should have left, I guess."
"Yes, I guess you should have." Larry thought about Ryan; as horrible as Ryan's behavior had been to his child, he could not help but feel sorry for a child whose behavior was costing him friends. He wondered what he would feel for an eighteen-year-old Ryan, and decided he might still feel sorry for him but in a different way. He wondered where the dividing line was.
After Larry played another short exercise, Ally said, "I got a question."
"Almost three hundred thousand kilometers per second."
"Huh?"
"That's the answer to your question."
"Na-uh."
"Sure it is. Your question is: 'What is the speed of light?' and that is the answer."
"No, I was gonna ask if I can go to the bead store tomorrow and get the stuff to fix Rocky's beads."
"That's the wrong question. I gave you the answer to the right question. Actually, it's two hundred ninety-nine thousand, seven hundred ninety-two, point — ugh — four five eight kilometers per second. That is a very good question and a very important answer."
"Daddy!"
""What? First you complain about my old jokes, and then you get annoyed when I use a new one. Oh well, you will think it's funny next time — or the twentieth time. Where do you keep your noids, Al?
"Come on, can I go?"
"But this is important. It is one thing that always stays the same, any time and any place in the whole universe. You can rely on it, Al. Well, almost anywhere you can; in some weird places things get real weird."
"OK, like where?" Ally said, kind of wanting to know and kind of wanting to play along just to get done with it quicker.
"OK, like black holes and way out between the galaxies. Even things like time and distance and mass might all get mixed up in those places."
"Oh yeah, things are wacko those places, but is it OK if I go to the bead store tomorrow, or not?"
"I guess so, if you can figure out how to get there. Your after school schedule is beyond me, Pud."
"Tomorrow I'm in after-school-care while Jenny has her dance class, and then Jim brings us home. On Mondays, we're in ASC 'til T.K. finishes wrestling, and then we ride the second bus. On Tuesdays, Gail comes on the first bus with us, and then Jim brings T.K. home, and he and Gail go...."
"Stop — stop; don't ruin the mystery; all I know is Jim, Gail and T.K. had it all worked out, and track season and the play are going to mess it all up, and parents are going to have to get involved again. I bet Jenny won't mind if Jim takes you to the store tomorrow. Are you going to wear them every day again?"
"Yeah."
Larry nodded.
"Real boys wear 'em too. Some of T.K.'s and Jim's friends have earrings too. Can I get my ears pierced?"
"Someday you can, but let's wait awhile," Larry said.
Ally accepted that with a sigh. He said, "T.K. is mad at Greg, because his mom gave him some heart earrings for Valentine's, and he wore them to school."
Larry sighed now and said, "I thought that was coming."
"But he's been wearing earrings for a long time. Why is T.K. mad now?"
"Probably the kind of earrings, Al. Greg is ready to make an announcement and T.K. isn't, and he is afraid that people might think the announcement applies to Greg's friends too. T.K. doesn't even know whether the announcement is true about himself or not. But Jim thinks he knows the answer already."
"What announcement?"
"That he likes to wear pretty earrings," Larry said.
"T.K. doesn't; hoops and plain studs, maybe."
Larry leaned his head over to bump Ally's. He said, "Greg wants people to know the real Greg, because it is easier to find your real friends when you don't have secrets. But before you can do that you have to be sure who the real you is. And it's a problem because some people might decide they don't like you right away too"
"Is T.K. going to stop being his friend if he finds out the wrong thing?
"I sure hope not. T.K. is kind of afraid that if he is different from Greg, Greg won't want to be regular friends anymore anyway. That makes him feel — well, it makes him feel a lot of things."
Larry looked down at his hands and was a little surprised to realize he was playing an old Ricky Nelson song. He kept playing until he reached the refrain and then sang it twice: "It's all right now, I've learned my lesson well; you can't please everybody, so ya' got to please yourself." Then he bumped Ally again.
Grace came down the stairs and into the living room. "I was wondering why my serenade was so eclectic. Are you two busy?"
"We're having some deep discussions," Larry said, "but you can eavesdrop."
Grace sat on the bench on Larry's other side, facing backwards. She said, "It's microwave appreciation night tonight. There are lots of leftovers in the refrigerator. Did you know you're an only child tonight, Dally?"
Ally nodded, and Larry said, "That's going to happen a lot between now and the performances. I hope we don't get bored after Ally is in bed."
Grace said, "Maybe I can find a way to entertain you," and fluttered her eyelashes.
Larry fluttered his eyebrows back at her and made a growling sound.
Ally said, "Eww, yuck — Geesh."
Grace and Larry smiled at Ally, and Larry said, "Ally had trouble at school today, but only with dividing fractions."
"Oh," Grace said, "T.K. got in trouble with Mrs. Garcia during that unit too. She almost kicked him out of class."
"He did? I thought he was always great at math," Ally said.
"He is. But at that part he kept telling everyone how easy and cool it was, and he kept trying to take over the class until Mrs. Garcia got fed up."
Ally moaned; some people had all the luck.
"You have to remember that mathematicians aren't like most people, and see things their way, Dally. If I said to you, 'I don't got no bananas,' you would know I'm speaking incorrectly, and that I mean I don't have any bananas. A mathematician would ask where the bananas I don't not have are.
"When dividing fractions, remember that it already has been divided; one-third is one divided by three; so dividing by it is double-dividing, which is like undividing."
Larry said, "Double-dividing? Undividing??"
Ally said, "So a fourth into a half is like a fourth a person has half a cake already, so the whole person woulda had two cakes! Easy-Peazy." He put his fists on his hips, glared at Larry and said, "Why didn't you just say that?"
Larry looked back and forth from Ally to Grace and then let his head fall on the piano keys with a clang. "I don't know. I don't know," he said. "Some things in math can only be explained to some people by English majors, I guess."
Grace said. "It's OK, Dear, I'm sure there are some things you understand just fine."
Larry sighed and said, "Let's go see how hot we can make the microwave."
"Wait, Mom, I gotta ask you something."
Larry said, "Two hundred ninety-nine thousand, seven hundred ninety-two, point four five eight kilometers per second. I all ready told you."
Ally smiled and bumped Larry, then he said, "It's about Jody's; seriously."
Grace said, "Dalleeeey."
"Just two things; promise."
Grace looked at Larry, who was softly playing some exercises again and actively not looking at Grace. She said, "Only two things."
"'K, I promised to be Jody's friend, so I will be, and it doesn't matter how well we get to know them, anyway."
"You are a very nice and an honorable person, Ally-Dally. But I knew that, didn't I? You can be his friend without an overnight this weekend though."
Ally sighed, one card played and no improvement. He said, "OK. You reminded me of the fox in 'The Little Prince', remember? So, I waited patiently and was available, like I was s'posed to. Now Jody has come over and been tamed; I can't push him away even a little bit now, the first time, or he won't ever be as tamed as he would have been."
When arguing with people that live half their lives in books, using literary analogies really gives an unfair advantage. Neither of her older children had ever realized how well such arguments worked on Grace, and she hoped Ally wasn't going to get too good at it. It is even worse using that book against someone who admires it and thinks of you as her Little Prince and her Rose.
Grace hit Larry on the arm. He stopped playing and said, "I just told him trying again didn't mean pestering forever and to have good reasons to discuss."
Grace grinned at Ally. She wasn't the kind of person who thought changing one's mind indicated weakness or lack of intelligence; she knew the opposite to be true, but she didn't like showing how fast she did it. She said, "I'll think about it and tell you in the morning."
Ally knew his mom well enough that he didn't have to wait until the morning to get happy. He thought, "Allll riight!" but didn't say it.
Larry said, "Let's eat. I don't feel like not having some of the lamb chops from Tuesday."
"There's not none left," Grace said.
Ally asked, "Can I play you a song first? Josh taught me it."
"Josh, huh?" Larry said, "And you can play it on the piano?"
"Yeah, kinda."
"OK, one quick time," Grace said.
"'K." Ally flicked his hair back with the backs of his fingers; he stretched his fingers out way in front of him like he was warming up for a concerto; he used his right index finger to pound out a march rhythm on a note somewhere near middle-C. After eight notes he began singing: "This is the song that never ends; it goes on and on my friends; some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, and they'll be singing it forever just because: this is the song that never ends; it goes on and...."
Larry picked Ally up and carried him under one arm toward the kitchen. Ally's voice got louder to make up for the lost accompaniment, but he never missed a beat.
"...on my friends; some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, and they'll be singing it forever...."
Stories:
"I Am Too!" Jody yelled as he opened his front door.
"You Are Not! I Am!" Ally screamed from right behind him.
"No Way! — We're Here!" Jody shouted.
Jody's mom walked to the entry hall while saying, "I and the neighbors heard. What are you two arguing about already? — Oh my gosh!"
"Ally says he's dirtier than I am," Jody said with a grin threatening to break his face.
"I am! By lots," yelled Ally.
"That is a contest with absolutely no winners. Get those shoes off right away!"
Grace followed Jody and Ally, carrying Ally's backpack and sleeping bag. She was still uncomfortable about this overnight, and she knew Ally was a little nervous too, in spite of his commitment to be Jody's friend. Her anxiety had increased when she picked the two children up from their Saturday detention and found that Ally had obtained a ponytail during the day. Jody, however, didn't seem affected by it at all, and the two of them were getting along very well and having a great time. That had eased her mind some; now she was watching closely for the reaction of the woman who had once married the former Coach Edwards.
As she walked in, Grace gave Ruth a small shrug and half a smile. She said, "I'm afraid I'm delivering damaged goods."
Ruth returned Grace's smile but still addressed the kids. "What in the world have you two been up to?"
"We got to clean out all the flower beds all along the front of our building, and then had to spread out some new dirt on top," Jody said.
"Yeah. If it had been rainy or something, we woulda had to just clean blackboards and stuff. And Mr. Jeffers let us ride on his cart and said we were the best workers ever and if we have another riot next month we can come back and help plant the flowers." Ally added.
"This was supposed to be a punishment!" Ruth said, "And I think that if Jody gets in any more fights, Ms Yunger might have other plans for him."
"No," Jody said, "Ms Chen was there and said she would tell us when the right time to get in trouble was, but to be good 'til then or we couldn't." Once his shoes were off, Jody said, "Come on, Ally. Have you played that video game where you roll stuff up into giant balls?"
"Yeah, T.K. rolled up the Eiffel Tower and Taj Mahal. Let's go."
"Hold it, right there!" Ruth said in a sham panic, "You're not going anywhere but the showers."
Grace said, "Ruth, I should take Ally home and bring him back in a better state."
"No," Ruth said and then went over to Grace and whispered, "I don't want to end this party; I haven't seen him this happy in a very, very long time." Then she said in a louder voice, "You two get upstairs. Jody, show Ally your bathroom, and you use mine."
Ally asked, "Can't we just do it together?"
"No, I think not; not this time," Ruth said, "It will be quicker, and you'll do a better job separated."
Jody said, "Go real, real fast, Ally."
Both kids had gone up about four stairs when Ruth said, "Jody."
Jody ran backwards down the stairs, like a reverse button had been pushed, then turned and looked up at his mother; Ally imitated him.
She said, "Don't sit on anything or touch anything until you're clean, not even the walls."
Both kids nodded and charged back up the same four stairs before Grace said, "Ally-dally! Don't I even get a goodbye?"
They ran backwards down the stairs again, and Ally spread his arms to give Grace a hug, but she said, "Stop! Don't you dare hug me right now." She kissed her fingers and put them on Ally's dirty forehead, and then turned him around to remove the ponytail holder.
Ruth said, "Grace, do you want to wait until Ally is fit for a proper goodbye; coffee is made, and I think we should get to know each other."
T.K. was waiting for taxi service to the mall, but the invitation definitely took priority and, all by itself, had eased some of Grace's anxiety about the overnight. She handed Ally his backpack, and said, "That sounds wonderful, thank you. Al, wash your hair too; there's shampoo in the front pocket. Remember, your church clothes are in the big part, so wait until you are clean and dry before you open it and put them somewhere to keep them nice. OK?"
Ally agreed, and he and Jody were back up the four steps once more when Ruth again said, "Wait, Jody." So again, he did the reverse running thing. His mother said, "When you're done with the shower, get the nail file and bring it downstairs."
Jody nodded again and ran back up the stairs, but apparently he had become stuck; as soon as he reached the fifth step he went in reverse all the way back to his mother, turned around and looked at her, then went back up the stairs to the same point. He did this twice more before Ruth gave him a push and said, "Get upstairs, Jobo. If you're stuck in a loop, I might have to reboot you," and she swung her foot in his direction. That got him unstuck, and he reached the next floor.
When the kids were gone at last, Ruth said, "Grace, come on into the kitchen. Let's talk."
Grace asked, "About little boys with pony tails?"
Ruth answered, "About happy little boys with ponytails. That is a real eye opener for me and, after the last three years, it makes some very painful mistakes hurt even more."
A little while later, not nearly as long as you thought it would take, Ally came out of the bathroom. He was carrying his backpack and wrapped in a towel with wet hair and the skin on his face and hands now visible. He looked at all the doors in the hall and had no idea where to go. Just as he was about to call out, Jody came through one door, identically dressed and improved, and yanked him towards another door. Ally closed the door after they went in, but Jody immediately opened it halfway.
The room they were in was like no kid's room Ally had ever seen. There was a dresser with nothing but a clock on top of it, a desk that was perfectly arranged and one floor-to-ceiling bookcase with almost half the shelves empty. The only things on the walls were four posters of football and basketball stars, and the bed had a cover stretched tightly over it that had the local football team's logo on it. The only things close to toys in the entire room were the sports equipment, and that was neatly placed on a special rack.
Jody jumped on to the bed, and Ally said, "I got stuff in here to show ya'." He opened his backpack and pulled out Bucephalus.
Jody said, "You still got stuffed animals?"
Ally took a deep breath before he said, "Uh huh, this is Bucephalus. He's special."
"Like Alexander the Great's horse? How come you got him?" Jody was looking at Bucephalus like he wanted to give the horse a hug, or maybe just pet him, but didn't dare.
"'Cuz my name is Alexander. Duh." Ally said, but he was happy that Jody already knew who Bucef was.
Jody said, "Oh, 'course. I thought it was just Ally," and he didn't say anything else about keeping stuffed animals.
"I got stuff for you," Ally said as he pulled out two books and a paper sack. He showed Jody the copy of "The Little Prince", and asked if he had ever read it. Since he hadn't, Ally said. "You got to. 'Specially the part about how to tame foxes; you can keep that my mom said, 'cuz we got about four copies still. This one you can only borrow, it's real sad but good; my mom made me read it, and it's about a boy named Jody, so you will stop telling me that's a girl's name." Then he handed Jody a copy of "The Yearling".
"My–X-step-father said it was, but my mom's started using it again since he left." Jody said. "You sure read a lot. And you should have a red backpack, since you're like Santa Claus."
Ally giggled. (I don't know if he noticed the effort it took for Jody to mention Mr. Edwards.) Then he handed Jody the bag and said, "Here, this is the only real present. 'Cuz you're my friend now."
Jody grinned very wide and said, "But I got nothing for you."
Ally rolled his eyes. "Just open it already and put it on! 'Sides you gave me a box of candy for Valentine's, and all I gave you was a card."
Jody grimaced, which was an admission about the candy, and he said, "It was a really nice card. I saved it." Inside the bag was a string of beads exactly like the one Rocky had made for Ally, except the wood beads were a darker color and the end pieces were yellow stones instead of green glass.
Jody smiled, but then he looked worried. He said, "Ally, you know that wearing beads and playing with girls and talking about girl stuff is why Ryan and those guys fight you?"
Ally bit on one of his beads for a second; he hadn't gotten the bead with the teeth marks in the right place and was having to train a new one for that job. "'Course I do," he said, "but I don't know why that makes them. These aren't girl beads, for real, Jody; lots of boys wear them too. You don't got to wear 'em all the time, or at all, but just keep 'em."
"No, I like 'em. Really. It's just — You hook it on me. I'll wear 'em, at least sometimes. It's like yours were — hey, yours are fixed. Just noticed."
"Yeah, David found all but three of 'em, and I got a new string. He wouldn't go to the doctor's 'til he'd found them." The thought of all of that still made them both feel bad, and Ally added, "I think David might turn out to be all right."
Jody shrugged. In his world, a person turning out to be all right was not something to be anticipated. He said, "Don't know. Don't you worry 'bout getting teased at all, Ally?"
"I just don't care 'bout those rules anymore." Ally had thought about this discussion and had some suggestions planned. "If you don't want to be my friend 'cuz of that it's 'K. You don't got to get teased 'cuz of me. I'll still be nice."
"NO! Na-uh, I didn't mean that! I think it's neat the way you just do things."
Ally grinned at Jody, and Jody grinned back.
Ruth called up, "Hey, did you two get lost? Ally's mom needs to leave soon."
"OK, we're coming," Jody answered.
"I just brought church clothes. Should I put on my pajamas?"
"I guess. I'll wear mine too."
Jody pulled out a typical pair of solid blue slip-on boy pajamas with ribbed cuffs and ankles. Ally noticed that even the insides of his drawers were very neat. Jody looked around the room; then he went over and sat on the floor in a nook between the end of the bed and the closet door before he removed his towel and started dressing.
Ally dropped his towel by the bed and then took out his pajamas. The bottom part had multi-colored stripes and flared legs. The top was mostly white but the short-sleeves, the patch pocket and the reinforcing around the v-neck were all made out of the same material as the pants. Many people would not have recognized them as girl pajamas; Jody apparently didn't.
They started down the stairs, and after four steps, Jody went in reverse again, pulling Ally back up too.
"Gee, are you a yo-yo or something?" Ally asked
Jody said, "We got to have something on our feet; you got slippers or want to borrow some socks?
"Oh, I brought my witch socks from Halloween, but forgot. My daddy says bare feet hibernate in winter."
Jody found that a lot funnier than Ally thought he ever had, but he had heard it even before he understood it. Once they were shod — or socked — they went to the kitchen.
It took Grace a second before she could greet Ally. He always had one pair of regular pajamas that he kept for sleepovers, but what he was wearing was not his current pair. She had never seen these before.
Jody showed Ruth his beads and asked if it was OK to wear them. She said, "Of course it is. They look wonderful." Then she leaned over and whispered to him, "He's not coming back, Heart. He's not coming back."
Ally hadn't heard that and said, "Where are the video games, or do you want to do something else?"
Ruth said, "I doubt we're done with you yet. I'm glad the mud monsters have been vanquished, but let me see your hands."
The hands were good, except that small gardens threatened to sprout from under each fingernail. Ruth took the nail file that Jody had remembered and started digging. Grace had already taken a similar implement from her purse and called Ally over.
"I can do this myself," Jody said.
"So can I," said Ally.
Grace answered, "Maybe, but we can do it better, faster and deeper. Plus we will keep the dirt on the napkins. We still like doing things for you sometimes, too. Is that so terrible?"
Jody and Ally sighed and held their hands still. At least the embarrassment wasn't too bad when they were both in the same predicament.
Ally took a look around the room while he was immobilized; it looked pretty much like most of the other kitchens he had seen, but there was a den that opened up off one side. In the den, there was a couch with a back facing the kitchen. Above the back of the couch, there was something that startled him: four dark brown eyes were staring at him; those usually came in twos.
He lifted his free hand and wiggled his fingers towards the eyes, and two identical smiles, each with the same missing tooth, appeared below the eyes. Both grins and all the eyes were framed by brown hair almost as light as Ally's. While the eye and hair colors had come from the far opposite side of the gene pool from Jody's colors, every other feature of the faces proved it was a single pool.
Jody saw where Ally was looking and said, "Oh, those are our house-gremlins, Bam and Wam."
"Those aren't our names!" was the stereo response.
Ruth said, "Ally, those are Jody's sisters, Tamar and Camille. We usually call them Tammy and Cammy or Tam and Cam, and sometimes things that rhyme like Jam and Lamb, but we Do Not call them Bam or Wam."
"Hi, Tam; hi, Cam," Ally said and smiled.
The two six year old girls came over the top of the couch and into the kitchen. They both said, "Hi," in unison, and then one said, "Can we get manic'urs too?" at the same time the other asked, "Is she spending the night?"
Ruth said, "Girls this is Ally, and yes, he is spending the night. Ally this one is Tam (She put a hand on one head.), and this one (She changed heads.) is Cam. As soon as I'm finished with Jody, Tammy, it will be time to make dinner. I'll do your nails another time, Swee'pea."
"Is Ally your girl friend, Jody?" Tammy asked.
"Ally isn't a girl; he's my best friend." That last part had popped out; Jody didn't use that term a lot, but it made him smile now.
It gave Ally a huge grin too. "How do you tell them apart?" he asked Jody.
"Don't know. Just do. But it doesn't matter; if you call one they both come. Watch. — Ram!"
The girls both reached over and hit Jody on the arm; both were giggling.
Grace had finished Ally's fingernails. He started using the brush he had brought downstairs and asked her for his ponytail holder. Grace told him it was too dirty to put in clean hair and to leave it down tonight.
Ally gave a big sigh, and Ruth came to his rescue. She opened the sugar bowl and revealed it held a slew of hair gizmos; Ally looked through the barrettes and elastic bands, but most were too small to hold a ponytail. The reason for that was reveled by Cammy, who said, "Do pigtails; they're cuter."
"My hair is too short for that," Ally said.
"I think I could do it if you wanted, Ally," Ruth said, "I'm a pigtail pro."
Ally smiled and went over to Ruth. She sat him on her knee and brushed his hair hard. She managed to make two passable pigtails, and Ally handed her two mismatched holders; one with two yellow daisies on it, and one with one yellow and one blue teddy bear on it.
Ally went over to try to see his reflection in the oven door, and Cammy said, "You look sweet. Why don't you do yours, Jody?"
Jody closed his eyes for a second, but then surprised everyone by saying, "OK," and getting onto his mother's knee. His hair was longer than it had been last fall, but still barely touched the top of his ears. Ruth managed to make a spike on one side, but then gave up.
"Let's do this instead," she said, and put two barrettes, one with a row of white flowers and one with a row of yellow flowers, on each side of his head.
In a breathless voice Jody said, "Aren't I beautiful?" and he flicked his wrist.
Tammy said, "That's cute."
Cammy said, "You look nice, Jody."
Grace said, "I have to run, or T.K. might go crazy from mall separation. Ally, run upstairs and bring me your dirty clothes."
When he came back down with his clothes in a paper sack, Grace was alone in the entry and sat on the steps to talk to him. "Ally, where did you get those pajamas," she asked.
"I borrowed them from Jenny."
"Why, Sweetie?"
"I don' know. — but — I guess, I promised to be his friend forever, so I'll be nice to him, but — I guess, but I really want Jody to really be my real friend, and he can't be really if he doesn't know who I really am. If he doesn't like me, I'll still be nice to him, 'cuz I promised, but I want it to be the real me he doesn't like or that he does."
Grace looked into the eyes of her so wise child and asked, "And the real you wears pajamas like these to bed?"
Ally looked down at his red and yellow socks and shook his head. "No, the real me wears Johanna Appleby's nightie to bed. This was a comp-a-mise. I was too scared — still."
Grace wrapped Ally in her arms. She had to admit that Ally's insight or intuition or luck, whichever it was, appeared to have worked out fine with Jody and Ruth Ducoux, but she wanted to cry out, "Be careful, very careful, My Baby." That discussion would have to wait for another time, however. Instead, she said, "Talk to me about it next time, please, Ally. And really have a really good time tonight, really. OK?"
"'K, will," he guaranteed her with a smile, then said, "Don't get too bored without me tonight." and kissed her cheek.
"I'll try not too, Dally. Maybe your Dad will come up with some entertainment." She grabbed both of his pigtails and pulled his head close to kiss his nose.
Jody and Ally each got to roll up one giant ball of school supplies in the video game before it was time for dinner. Before they even sat down, Cammy and Tammy asked what was for dessert; apparently, they needed that information to decide how many green beans to eat. Ruth said, "I'm going to make some cookies after I finish the kitchen, so you'll have time to get an appetite back after eating all your vegetables."
"I bake cookies all the time. Want us to help?" Ally asked.
"Well, thank you, but I'm just making the kind that you break apart and put in the oven," Ruth said.
"That's OK, that's the only kind I know how to make," Ally said. Actually, that was the only kind Ally had thought you could make at home.
Tammy said, "Jody's not s'pose to do kitchen work. That's not for boys."
Ally said, "That's just silly. My uncle is a real good cook. He says all the best cooks are men."
Tam said, "Well, that's what our daddy said."
"He wasn't our daddy!" Jody said; he was almost growling.
Ruth put a hand on Jody's arm and said, "It's all right. We've discussed this, Jody. Tam, we can repeal those kinds of rules now."
Ally tried to change the subject by asking about the two Appleby Dolls he had seen in the Den. Rose, it turned out, belonged to Tam, and Johanna belonged to Cam. They had got them for Christmas, and they were prized possessions. The one great disappointment was that they had just found out that Rose never, ever wore anything pink in spite of her name.
"Yeah," Ally said, "That makes lots of people mad. In one of the books it tells how Rose got fed up, 'cuz her mother would never let her wear anything but pink and, eventually, she got her to not make her anymore."
"Have you read the book?" Tammy asked.
"Yeah," Ally said. "My friend, Leah, has some of the other cousins' things that are pink, and sometimes she pretends that it is before that story and puts Rose in them. Can't do that all the time though, because Rose might get mad."
"They're not 'posed to get the others' things," Cammy said.
"Na-uh. We decided it was 'K, 'cuz they trade things in the books all the time. My Angie sleeps in Rose's bed every night, and she likes it."
Simultaneously Jody asked, "You have a doll?" and Cammy asked, "Can you bring Angie over to play next time?" and Tammy asked, "Can I get some of those things, Mama? Ally, will you come help me pick?"
"Sure," Ally said, which was his answer to all three of them.
At the very same time Jody said, "No! He can't; he's going to play with ME."
Again, Ruth put her hand on Jody's arm to calm him down.
Jody said, "They're trying to steal my friend again."
"No, they're not, Jody. They are just being friendly, and so is Ally," Ruth said. She was a middle child; maybe that gave her insight into the current dynamic. "I'll tell you what; after dinner you stay here and help me — I'll teach you to bake cookies — while Ally gets to be the big kid for a while. Later, you can have Ally all to yourself." This would also give her the chance to talk to Jody alone.
Jody was far from happy about that plan, and he let that be known, but Ruth insisted, and he went along.
You know, Jody and Ally have a lot to do before Jody is ready to deliver his last line. Any parent knows the trouble with sleepovers is they last all night and part of the morning. We don't want to spend that long, however, so I'm going to fast forward through some parts of it. A dramatist would call it a dumb show; but that sound rather derogatory, don't you think? You might want to watch closely, just in case something important happens in the pantomime.
–{Fast forward}
Ally and the little girls marked almost every pink item in the Appleby Catalog. — Ally was given a pinafore and a kerchief from a costume box so he could visit the play grocery. — Tam put on a tiara and a long renaissance gown from the box; Cam donned the bottom of an Arabian princess costume, the top of a mermaid outfit and a crown. — Ally was handed a tiara to wear on top of his kerchief. — They fixed the hair of three miniature pop-singer dolls. —Jody stood in the door waiting to be invited in. — They played a board game. — Tam put a tall, pointed, pink hat with a tulle train on Jody's head. — The game rules suddenly allowed jumping off the slides and ladders by throwing your piece in the air. — Jody added the top from the Arabian princess costume to his outfit. — Everyone was rolling on the floor laughing. — Jody found a green and yellow dragon under a bed and played catch with it. — Ruth came in and curtsied to the four princesses. — When everyone was sitting perfectly still, she sat down a tray of milk and cookies on the floor and left.
–{Play}
Umm — some of you might be wondering why I don't just use the names of games and toys and stuff rather than describing them all the time or using the made up Applebys. It's not that I'm worried about trademark litigation; it's because I'm waiting for someone to offer me some money for a product placement. You know, I could write a scene where everyone enjoys a certain cereal or goes to a particular burger chain or something, and it would cost a lot less then it would to get your box sticking out of a trash can in some Hollywood production. If you know anyone in marketing, spread the word, but until I see the bucks, these kids will just keep playing with fashion dolls and plastic blocks and eating generic foods. I know most people fast forward through the commercial rather than the story, but this time the advertiser held the remote. Sorry about the interruption. Now back to our story.
While they were eating the cookies, Ally asked if he could fix Rose's and Johanna's hair after Tam and Cam had gone to bed (He had been looking for a gentle way to tell them the dolls' hair was a mess.). They agreed as long as Ally would bring them back and put them in their beds before he went to sleep. Then they asked Ally about other Appleby stories from the books and which were the best. Ally told them very short versions of how Maggie and Angie had saved the library by getting the deed to the Senator in time; and about the time Rose and Johanna found out who was trying to make the Widow Mathews think her house was haunted. When they asked for a third story, he said it was someone else's turn, and they turned to Jody.
Jody's first attempt was the story of "Jordan Rella and His Wicked Twin Sisters", but Tammy and Cammy would have none of that; they wouldn't even let him get to the part about the platinum loafers and turning the cucumber into a jet.
So Jody tried again; he looked at the dragon he had played with earlier and said, "OK — OK — This is a short one, 'K? Once upon a time, this guy (meaning the dragon) tried to settle down in an old abandoned farm, because he just wanted to raise cabbages. He liked cabbages; they were pretty and round and the same color as he is. And he didn't have to actually eat them, just grow 'em. But the Blue Knight came along and said, 'You are a dragon. You can't raise cabbages.' Then the knight tried to trap the dragon in the old farmhouse forever, and his big horse trampled around and messed up all the pretty cabbages. So the dragon flew away, so they wouldn't hurt more cabbages. He ran to his friend who lived up in the hills."
Jody went over and got another dragon off a shelf, this one was green and orange, then continued. "He was a shepherd, and he lived in a cave. They lived there for a while, but then the Blue Knight found them, and he said, 'Dragons aren't supposed to raise sheep; get in your cave and stay there forever.' The dragons tried to fight back, but if they had breathed fire on the knight they would have hurt the sheep, so they didn't. The knight said, 'Wa, Wa; what wimpy dragons you are; you can't even fight like dragons.' So the two dragons went up into the mountains and hid, but they were sad because they didn't have any sheep or cabbages. The end."
Tammy said, "That's a bad story; it's got a sad ending, and 'sides dragons are s'pose to be the scary ones and knights good."
"Na-ah," Ally said, "Can't always tell. I liked that story, 'cept the ending. I think they should find a friend to help them beat the Blue Knight. You should do a part two: 'The Return of Bam and Wam'."
Ruth had come back upstairs to get the girls ready for bed and had been standing, unnoticed, in the door listening to the end of the story. She said, "And I know a good person to be that friend, but right now it is time for the girls to get in the tub."
Tam and Cam ignored Ruth and said, "We don't like those names," and "Who are they."
Ruth said, "I'll explain it to them, Ally. You and Jody go on downstairs."
Alright — we don't really need to watch every detail of each round of the video game either. Let's move quickly to bed time.
–{Fast forward}
Jody took the plate and tray to the kitchen; Ally carried the two Appleby dolls and their brush. — They jumped onto the couch. — Jody began rolling up flowers in the video game, and Ally started brushing Rose's hair. — Jody put his feet on the dolls during Ally's turn at the video game. — Ally braided the doll's hair during Jody's turn. — Jody brushed Johanna's hair during Ally's turn. — The little girls ran into the room wearing pajamas and with feet that had morphed into rabbits; each presented Jody a dragon. — They both hugged Jody and kissed his cheek; they hugged Ally and Cammy kissed his cheek. — They ran back upstairs. — Ally showed Jody how to do a French braid, and together they finished the dolls' hair. — They each sat with their feet in the lap of the one playing the game for one turn. — They each sat with their head in the lap of the one playing the game for the rest or the turns. — Ruth came in; she left. — Ally finished his turn, and he moped up the stairs carrying a doll and a dragon; Jody moped behind him carrying a doll and a dragon. — They crept into the girls' room and put the dolls in their beds. — Ally and Jody rolled out two sleeping bags next to each other on the floor of Jody's room. — They decided to open the sleeping bags and put one on top of the other — Ruth came in with a pillow, and she took the cover off the bed and put it on top of the sleeping bags. — She hugged Jody and kissed his forehead; she hugged Ally too. — Ally and Jody got between the sleeping bags — Ruth turned out the light but left the door open halfway.
–{Play}
Ally said in almost a whisper, "Your room is really clean and neat." He thought Jody might have cleaned up just for him and thought he should say something.
"Uh-huh. I like it that way. I kinda get worried when stuff is messy, 'guess."
"Better not come into my room then."
"Doesn't bother me other places."
"That why you keep your stuff downstairs?"
"Na-uh; my–Xstepfather– made me; 'cuz I had ta come up here when I'uz bad."
"Oh." Ally tried to find a way to say something about a grownup being real stupid. He couldn't believe that Jody had ever been all that bad. He bit on his bead.
Jody took another deep breath and said, "MyXstepfather — also said I didn't play with stuff right and had to be watched. I treated robots and transforming things like dolls, he said. So all I got is blocks and guns and knives and junk. Also I don't like playing in here anyway, because it's lonely."
Ally tried to change the subject and said, "Oh — I didn't know you liked football and basketball so much to have posters though."
It didn't work. "I don't. —My Xstepf...."
"Just say 'he'."
"HE said that was what boys should put in their room. I couldn't put my own drawings up even, 'cuz he didn't like them. I don't even like soccer like you do, Ally. He made me do lots of sports stuff, but he always got mad. I use' to like gymnastics, but He said that was a girl sport."
Ally thought Jody was probably crying, though he couldn't see the tears. "Are you un-adopted now, Jody?" That would mean Edwards was gone for good.
"He — never really 'dopted us; it cost too much. He just made us change our names and said that made us his and was cheaper. And he said our real-daddy's name wasn't American and neither was Ducoux. And names had to be in his family."
"What was your daddy's name?"
"Lundke. My mama doesn't want us to use that name until we're grown up; 'cuz they tried to stop us from getting any of our daddy's money. It's my middle name now."
Ally thought a minute and said, "Well, he's right; that's not American. I've never heard of anyone named American though. His name wasn't American either."
Jody stared at Ally, and Ally continued, "You know Jenny English, in fifth grade. She lives next door to me. Her name is English, but she's American; don't think she's even ever been to England."
Jody finally started giggling.
"Oh — know what? The teacher next door to my kindergarten was French. I mean her name was Mrs. French, but it wasn't; 'cuz that's English not French."
"Huh?"
"Well the French would say Frans-say, not French; so it was French but it wasn't. Joseph American; that's OK; 'guess."
"Be quiet! I was being serious," Jody said and stuffed a dragon in Ally's face.
"'I know," Ally said.
"Ally, know what? —He was real nice at first, and then he moved in and started getting meaner and meaner. Don't tell anyone, but I was on time-out for hours all the time, and then last summer he started whipping me and sometimes made my bottom bleed, and I couldn't go to the doctor or tell Mama 'cuz he'd do it more. I thought it was 'cuz he got to know me better. That's a secret, please."
Ally put an arm over Jody and said, "'K, but it was just him."
"Mama says she thinks it was because he found out he couldn't have our money. He tried to steal some anyway and might go to jail. I hope he does."
"He can't come back though now, right?"
"Mama got him out twice, and he kept coming back. She says there is an Ar-res-training order or something now, so if he tries again he goes right to jail."
Ally hugged Jody tighter, and Jody moved closer to Ally. The dragons and Bucephalus were smushed between them. After a bit Ally said, "Now you got two dragons to help you fight monsters and blue knights though."
Jody chuckled and said, "You're so silly. And you messed up my best way to tease the twins too."
"Hee hee hee."
"Why are you so brave, because it's not really 'cuz of Bucephalus?"
"Huh? I'm not brave."
"Well, you do things and don't worry about getting teased. You even wore a ponytail today. It's like you aren't scared of getting hit at all."
"I don't wear it around most people, you know? Jody, I tried to act like a real boy, you know? That hurt a lot too, and it lasted longer than getting hit and stuff too. And it didn't make it less scary either. I don't want to anymore."
"Yeah, being scared hurts a lot too though."
"Uh-huh. I thought 'bout this; we could be secret friends, at home friends and not hang out together at school."
"No. I don't want that; I want to be real, real friends."
"Ignore those guys, hang with the good people and have fun. They hate that."
"Yeah," Jody said giggling.
They heard Ruth on the stairs and got very, very quiet, but it was too late. She said, "You two hush and go to sleep. Don't make me get fussy and ruin the whole night."
Jody said, "OK, Mama."
Ally said, "Sorry."
Ally hugged Bucephalus. Jody stretched then cuddled his two dragons. The tip of his thumb went inside his lips just the way Rocky's did, and Ally grinned at him.
Jody said, "You going to tease me 'cuz I do that; I just do it at night."
"Course not," Ally said, "I know someone else that does it just like that."
"It made — MyX — him real mad, and I had to paint this yucky stuff on it. But Mama and I tricked him. We left the very end alone, and he never knew."
Ally smiled at Jody. He had lots of kinds of friends. Josh and Leah and those guys were his friends because he had fun with them, and they didn't argue very much. Rocky was special because, even though they argued sometimes, they always wanted the other to be happy and almost always knew what the other was thinking about. Jody was special in a different way; it wasn't just they got along and liked each other. Ally thought that in Jody he had found someone who really needed to be taken care of by him, not just someone to be nice to and play with. That was very important, and that thought was almost too much for Ally. He almost stretched his neck out to kiss Jody right between the eyes, but he didn't know if Jody would like that, so he just stroked the back of Jody's head instead.
Jody grew a grin on either side of his thumb. He had other friends, a few at school and some from his old school too. Friends were people that you liked seeing and liked doing stuff with, and usually friendships took a lot of work so people wouldn't argue and fight and get tired of you. Ally was different from that, he thought. With Ally, it wasn't going to be hard to take care of the friendship; he felt sure they would always get along and like each other. Jody thought that in Ally he had found someone who really needed to be taken care of by him, not just someone to be nice to and play with. That was very important, and that thought was too much for Jody. He stretched his neck out and kissed Ally right between the eyes.
Ally giggled and said, "Boys aren't suppose' to do that."
Jody said, "Shut up! I don't care what boys are suppose to do."
Ally knew what he should say next, but he was giggling way too hard to say anything at all. He kept trying but couldn't, and he was sure Mrs. Ducoux was going to hear and get mad, so he stuffed Bucephalus's ear in his mouth.
Jody was totally confused. Ally wasn't going to tease him for saying that, was he? But why was he laughing so hard? Jody sat up and stared at Ally.
Finally, Ally got it together enough to sit up, and he kissed Jody on the cheek and pulled him back down. Jody stared at Ally and started giggling over how silly Ally was.
Soon Jody's eyes drifted closed.
Even though he was still giggling, and he was biting on Bucephalus's ear again, Ally's eyes closed at the same time.
Ally slept.
Ally dreamed.
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